August 7, 2025 • 19 mins
If you’ve ever questioned whether you’re confident enough to make a career pivot and start over, this episode is for you. Today, we're redefining what it means to be confident—no perfection required.
You’ll learn:
✅ A powerful new definition of confidence that sets you free from self-doubt
✅ How to reclaim your power by shifting your mindset and trusting yourself
✅ The truth about being “too confident” (and why most women have nothing to worry about)
✅ 4 strategies to boost your confidence fast—without waiting to feel "ready"
Whether you're dreaming of becoming a coach, launching a consulting business, or stepping into the spotlight as a paid speaker, this episode gives you the mindset and tools to lead with self-belief and step boldly into your next chapter.
Confidence isn’t something you’re born with—it’s a muscle you build. And with the right tools and support, you can strengthen it and finally reinvent your career.
If you're looking for additional support through coaching, visit my website to learn more about working together and my signature program EDIT Your Life™: www.karinfreeland.com/life-coaching
Book a call now!
Not ready for coaching? Join my Facebook Group community here.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Karin Freeland (00:00):
Welcome to Rock Your Reinvention, where I help
high-achieving career women likeyou get unstuck, make your
corporate exit strategy, andsuccessfully transition to your
next chapter.
Hi, I'm your host, KarinFreeland, a certified life coach
and corporate exit strategist.
Whether you want to start abusiness, become a speaker, or
something else, I'm here to giveyou the tools and strategies to
(00:23):
shift your mindset, build yourconfidence, and take bold
actions so you can rock yourreinvention.
Ready?
Let's go.
Today, we're talking aboutself-confidence.
I recently did a presentationon the keys to executive
presence for a local nonprofitthat I'm part of.
(00:44):
And after the meeting, a youngwoman came up to me and asked a
few questions.
She said, how do you portrayconfidence without being seen as
cocky or overconfident?
How did you become soconfident?
Were you always this confident?
And I thought it would bereally valuable if we spent some
(01:05):
time talking about confidencetoday, because this is one of
the most valuable muscles tobuild when you are reinventing
your life, making career movesor going through a transition of
any sort.
And it is a muscle, it is askill that you can build and get
better and better at.
(01:25):
Why is this so important?
Because you're undoubtedlystepping out of your comfort
zone if you are going through atransition.
And that takes guts.
That takes confidence.
Going after your dreams is away of reclaiming your power,
reclaiming who you are.
(01:45):
Now, if you've read my book,Grab Life by the Dreams, you
know I give you a new definitionfor confidence in Chapter 8.
But I want to make sure I shareit again so that you've got it
fresh in your mind.
This is how we defineconfidence at Karin Freeland
Life Coaching.
Confidence is a deep trust inyour own capabilities and a
(02:11):
desire to try something new ordifferent.
Understanding that even ifthings don't work out as
intended, you'll have learnedsomething in the process.
And what I love about thisdefinition, it takes a lot of
the pressure you may have feltoff the table, right?
(02:33):
And that's just a false ideathat confidence goes hand in
hand with perfection or that youhave to know all the answers to
be confident or you have tohave a certain amount of
experience before you can feelconfident in a specific area.
And it's just not true.
In fact, with this newdefinition, you can actually
(02:56):
embrace failure with gracebecause you know that even if
things don't go exactly how youhoped, you've learned something
along the way.
This is empowering.
It's freeing.
So now that we have our newdefinition, we can start
addressing the questions thatthis young woman posed.
(03:17):
And for starters, I love thatshe asked about seeing as cocky
or overconfident.
That certainly isn't how anyonewants to be portrayed.
And I hear this from so manywomen.
They don't want to sing theirown praises because they fear
being seen as arrogant, asbraggadocious.
(03:38):
And I told her that she was atzero risk of this happening
simply because she was concernedabout it.
cocky people don't worry aboutbeing seen as cocky.
So the fact that she had thewherewithal to not want to be
seen that way gave me theassurance cockiness was not in
her nature and it should giveyou the same assurance as well.
(04:00):
Now, if you're still worriedabout seeming cocky, I would
invite you to look at yourintentions.
For example, If you were tospeak up in a meeting to share a
personal story, and it's comingfrom a place of genuinely
wanting to communicate a helpfulpoint, that would most likely
(04:21):
come across as confidence.
But if you spoke up from aplace of showing off or trying
to one-up a colleague, then itmight translate as cocky.
Intention has a lot to do withhow you're perceived.
Same thing with going live onsocial media.
I hear this all the time frommy clients who are in business.
(04:41):
They're like, oh, I don't wantpeople to think I'm bragging or
I'm always talking about my bookor my podcast or whatever it is
that they're trying to promotein their business.
And I have to remind them, whatis your intention?
Yeah, if you're going out thereto brag on yourself, that
probably doesn't feel good.
If you're going out there toserve your clients and make sure
that they get this valuableinformation that they need, then
(05:04):
it's going to come across as,Confident, right?
You're going to be seen assupportive, caring, all those
good things.
So generally speaking, mostwomen, not all, but a good
portion of us have little tofear when it comes to being
overconfident.
And you know what?
Given my choice, I would ratherhave to reel you in than push
(05:28):
you to be more confident.
Now let's go ahead and look ather second question.
Were you always this confident?
confident.
And I had to laugh, not at her,of course, but at myself when
she said this, because just twonights earlier, I was practicing
the workshop that I had justdelivered in my home office.
(05:50):
I kept flubbing my words,forgetting the points I wanted
to hit on the slides, forgettinghow my stories tied back to
that specific key to improvingexecutive presence that I was
supposed to be describing.
And I came downstairs andcompletely deflated.
And my husband of course couldsense it.
So he asked me what's wrong.
(06:10):
And I went into that full innercritic beast mode.
It sucks.
The presentation sucks.
I suck.
It's too much info, not enoughmeat.
I don't know why I do this tomyself.
I need to stop signing up forspeaking gigs.
This is going to be a disaster.
And of course he looked at melike I had 10 heads.
He's like, Karin, I'm sure it'snot that bad.
(06:33):
You've been a paid speaker forfive years now.
You're always your worstcritic.
Besides, you got two days togo.
You'll be fine.
You always are.
And I wanted to believe him,but there was still a part of me
that was certain this was goingto tarnish my brand as a paid
speaker forever.
Sound familiar?
Has your inner critic gotten alittle too big for her britches?
(06:56):
Now, about this time, the womanthat I'm telling the story to
lets out an audible gasp.
And she goes, what?
Are you kidding me?
We all love this presentation.
It was so good.
And of course it was good,right?
Because I am a good speaker.
I practice the crap out of it,right?
(07:16):
There were so many reasons whythis would be good.
And that's not being cockyagain, right?
That's being confident.
That's trusting in ourselves.
That's believing that we can dothe things that we set out to
do.
So she said, well, what did youdo?
Wow.
Did you have the confidence tocome out here and deliver this
tonight if that's how you werefeeling two days ago?
(07:38):
And it was a great question,but it took me a minute to
answer because I forget thatsometimes what comes so easy to
me, correcting my mindset, doesnot come easy to others.
And so here's what I would havesaid if I'd had more time to
formulate a thorough answer.
For starters, I went back to mydefinition on confidence.
(08:01):
I could confidently show up anddeliver that presentation
because deep down I knew that Iwouldn't let myself down.
I trusted myself.
I also knew I'd rally for twodays until I knew every story,
every line, every bullet byheart.
I also knew that I'd inevitablyscrew up something because,
(08:24):
well, I'm human, but that Iwould learn in the process.
Therefore, it's all aworthwhile experience.
And that's why committing thisdefinition to memory or putting
it in your phone as a reminder,having it written in your
journal, somewhere that you cango back to is so important.
And you can always come back tothis when you need a confidence
(08:47):
boost.
But then I turned to some moretangible tactics.
I went and I read all of myreviews and testimonials from
past speaking gigs.
The ones with the five stars,the ones that talked about my
energy and how I made theaudience feel, the reviews that
commented on my knowledge andexpertise, just doing that one
(09:11):
little activity boosted myconfidence by 80%.
To get the last 20% of the waythere, I prepped, and prepped
during my remaining time.
I even showed up early on theday of the presentation to do a
dry run in the actual meetingspace before anyone else got
there.
I made sure I got dressed in mymost confident outfit with a
(09:34):
pair of snakeskin heels thatmade me feel like a badass.
Not actual snakeskin, just aprint.
No animals were harmed whileboosting my confidence.
And I sat my inner critic downfor a little heart to heart and
reminded her that I'd done a lotof research and worked on this
presentation for over a month.
It was solid and she needed toget on board with me.
(09:57):
And you can use thesestrategies to help you boost
your confidence too.
One of the benefits of being acoaching client of mine is that
you have access to me via Voxer,which is a free app in the app
store, that allows us to go backand forth in real time between
sessions.
And my clients love that theycan reach out to me for a pep
(10:19):
talk and help boosting theirconfidence when they need it.
But if you're not coaching withme, you can always get a
confidence mentor.
This is just someone who can bethat mirror for you and shine a
light on your talents andabilities, kind of how my
husband did when I was having mymeltdown.
They can point out when yourdoubts are unfounded and
(10:42):
encourage you to take that leapof faith when you need an extra
push.
Don't be afraid to ask afriend, a colleague, a spouse,
anyone who might be interestedin supporting you to be your
confidence mentor.
And it's so easy.
I'm sure even if you don't haveformal reviews or testimonials,
(11:06):
I'm sure you have some glowingperformance appraisals or some
emails that have been sent aboutwhat a great job you did at
your work or something, right,that you can go back to in those
moments when you're feeling alittle low that will boost up
your confidence.
All right, now let's go back toher other question, which was
(11:28):
how did you become so confident?
And that's why you're reallylistening to this episode, isn't
it?
Because you want to get thetips and the strategies that you
can employ today to boost yourconfidence and reclaim your
power.
Before I share them, I want youto remember that this is years
in the making, okay?
There is no silver bullet.
(11:48):
There's no overnight fix forconfidence.
But if you follow these tips,you can and you will improve
your confidence.
The first piece is positiveself-talk.
And I know that this is not thefirst time I've ever mentioned
this on the show, but there's noother way around it, right?
(12:09):
You have to stop speaking sonegatively to yourself.
If you have a negative thought,you need to catch yourself.
You need to shut it down andthen feed your brain something
nice.
Oh, Karin, you can't leavecorporate and run a business.
You don't know the first thingabout running a business.
(12:29):
Hey, it wasn't nice to talk tome like that.
I didn't know how to work incorporate once upon a time
either, and I learned how to dothat pretty well.
I know I could learn to run abusiness and succeed.
Bam, shut down, just like that.
And if you're an advancedstudent, you'll create a list of
(12:50):
confidence-boosting positiveaffirmations, and you will
repeat them daily.
Yes, daily for at least 30days.
It's gonna take that long.
You've got a lot ofconditioning and a lot of
rewiring to do, right?
If you are prone to thatnegative talk, it's gonna take
some time to get into that newrhythm.
So be aware, catch yourself assoon as you see what you're
(13:14):
doing, shut it down, replace itwith a positive thought and have
those daily affirmations.
And I'm telling you, the morepositive talk you can give
yourself, you become yourbiggest cheerleader. The second
thing you can do is to act asif.
Now I talk about this in mybook, Grab Life by the Dreams,
(13:37):
as fake it till you make it.
And essentially what this meansis that you're going to ask
yourself the question, whatwould the most confident,
successful version of me do inthis situation?
And then you go do that thing.
The most confident, successfulversion of me would start that
podcast and stop worrying aboutthe tech or stop worrying about
(14:00):
if anybody's going to listen orstop worrying about if I'll have
enough to say, right?
The most confident, successfulversion of me would just press
record and start getting thoseepisodes done.
The most successful, confidentversion of me would quit my six
figure job and figure out how tolead that business and how to
replace my corporate income.
The most confident, successfulversion of me would write that
(14:23):
book that's been on my heart for10 years and put pen to paper
and hire an editor and invest inmyself right i cannot tell you
how many times this one simplelittle question has gotten me
unstuck and moving forward andwhen you believe in you others
will believe in you that's whyconfidence is so powerful it's
(14:46):
also very magnetizing you knowwhen you see someone who is
confident you are just drawn tothem and I know that you want to
have that same effect in yourlife as well.
Okay the next tip I want to runby you is own it and you might
be like what do you mean by ownit you have to stop dwelling on
what you don't possess Theskills, the title, the money,
(15:12):
the possessions, whatever it isyou're harping on that you think
you don't have and need, let itgo.
Shift your focus to what you dohave.
The skills you possess, thematerial goods you do own, the
money that you do have in yourbank account, the title that you
(15:33):
do currently have.
Own who you are.
and where you are in yourjourney.
And the sooner you start doingthat, the sooner you're gonna
display self-confidence.
Because when you are in a placewhere you are just constantly
like, well, I don't have this,I'm not good enough, you just
can never feel like you're goodenough.
(15:55):
So I really wanna challengeyou.
If you were gonna stake a claimtoday on who you are, what are
all the amazing qualities andtalents and abilities that you
have?
Make a list of that, own it,focus on those, leverage those
to get where you want to go.
(16:16):
And the next thing you can dothat's gonna really boost your
confidence is celebrate youraccomplishments.
I tell you, as women, weusually do a really bad job at
this.
We achieve something and thenwe just move on to the next
thing with little more than aquick like, oh yeah, we got that
done, okay, next.
but that's the quickest way toforget how amazing you are.
(16:39):
You know, the other night aftermy presentation, I celebrated
my accomplishment.
It was nothing crazy.
I treated myself to a beer onmy couch and I don't really
drink very often.
So it was a huge treat.
It was a hot, hot summer nightand a German Pilsner just
sounded so delicious.
I had one that was it, but itwas just like the perfect way to
(17:00):
unwind and be like, you did it.
You got through this and youcould do it again.
I really wanted to make surethat my brain had something to
connect to my success and to beaware of that and to remind my
inner critic, remember you werefreaking out about nothing.
When you do this, it helps youclaim your power and boost your
(17:23):
confidence.
So is there something recentlyin your life that you have
forgotten to celebrate?
Go ahead and celebrate it now.
It's not too late.
Do a little something.
It doesn't have to cost muchmoney.
It doesn't have to be anythingextravagant, but just a little
something to tell your brain andconnect that amazing success
with the reward.
So I hope this helps you seethat confidence is a skill.
(17:49):
It is a muscle that can bebuilt and strengthened.
You're not alone if you don'tfeel as confident as you want
to.
Most women don't, but we justkeep putting one foot in front
of the other and pressingforward.
forward.
As you heard, I was not alwaysthis self-confident.
I still struggle with it fromtime to time.
But now you have some tools andstrategies to help you build
(18:15):
your confidence and pull it backup when you feel like you're in
a slump.
And of course, if you're askingthe question, how do you
portray confidence without beingseen as cocky or overconfident,
you're probably at zero risk ofdoing that.
So you can keep calm and beconfident.
Thanks for listening and keepflexing your confidence muscle.
(18:36):
Thanks for tuning in.
I hope you're inspired to takeaction by committing to one of
the tips or strategies we talkedabout in today's episode.
If you want more accountabilityand support, I've got your
back.
Book a complimentary empoweredexit strategy call today.
Visit karinfreeland.com tolearn more and book your
(18:58):
45-minute session.
Until next time,stay fabulous.
Welcome to Rock Your Reinvention, where I help
high-achieving career women likeyou get unstuck, make your
corporate exit strategy, andsuccessfully transition to your
next chapter.
Hi, I'm your host, KarinFreeland, a certified life coach
and corporate exit strategist.
Whether you want to start abusiness, become a speaker, or
something else, I'm here to giveyou the tools and strategies to
(00:23):
shift your mindset, build yourconfidence, and take bold
actions so you can rock yourreinvention.
Ready?
Let's go.
Today, we're talking aboutself-confidence.
I recently did a presentationon the keys to executive
presence for a local nonprofitthat I'm part of.
(00:44):
And after the meeting, a youngwoman came up to me and asked a
few questions.
She said, how do you portrayconfidence without being seen as
cocky or overconfident?
How did you become soconfident?
Were you always this confident?
And I thought it would bereally valuable if we spent some
(01:05):
time talking about confidencetoday, because this is one of
the most valuable muscles tobuild when you are reinventing
your life, making career movesor going through a transition of
any sort.
And it is a muscle, it is askill that you can build and get
better and better at.
(01:25):
Why is this so important?
Because you're undoubtedlystepping out of your comfort
zone if you are going through atransition.
And that takes guts.
That takes confidence.
Going after your dreams is away of reclaiming your power,
reclaiming who you are.
(01:45):
Now, if you've read my book,Grab Life by the Dreams, you
know I give you a new definitionfor confidence in Chapter 8.
But I want to make sure I shareit again so that you've got it
fresh in your mind.
This is how we defineconfidence at Karin Freeland
Life Coaching.
Confidence is a deep trust inyour own capabilities and a
(02:11):
desire to try something new ordifferent.
Understanding that even ifthings don't work out as
intended, you'll have learnedsomething in the process.
And what I love about thisdefinition, it takes a lot of
the pressure you may have feltoff the table, right?
(02:33):
And that's just a false ideathat confidence goes hand in
hand with perfection or that youhave to know all the answers to
be confident or you have tohave a certain amount of
experience before you can feelconfident in a specific area.
And it's just not true.
In fact, with this newdefinition, you can actually
(02:56):
embrace failure with gracebecause you know that even if
things don't go exactly how youhoped, you've learned something
along the way.
This is empowering.
It's freeing.
So now that we have our newdefinition, we can start
addressing the questions thatthis young woman posed.
(03:17):
And for starters, I love thatshe asked about seeing as cocky
or overconfident.
That certainly isn't how anyonewants to be portrayed.
And I hear this from so manywomen.
They don't want to sing theirown praises because they fear
being seen as arrogant, asbraggadocious.
(03:38):
And I told her that she was atzero risk of this happening
simply because she was concernedabout it.
cocky people don't worry aboutbeing seen as cocky.
So the fact that she had thewherewithal to not want to be
seen that way gave me theassurance cockiness was not in
her nature and it should giveyou the same assurance as well.
(04:00):
Now, if you're still worriedabout seeming cocky, I would
invite you to look at yourintentions.
For example, If you were tospeak up in a meeting to share a
personal story, and it's comingfrom a place of genuinely
wanting to communicate a helpfulpoint, that would most likely
(04:21):
come across as confidence.
But if you spoke up from aplace of showing off or trying
to one-up a colleague, then itmight translate as cocky.
Intention has a lot to do withhow you're perceived.
Same thing with going live onsocial media.
I hear this all the time frommy clients who are in business.
(04:41):
They're like, oh, I don't wantpeople to think I'm bragging or
I'm always talking about my bookor my podcast or whatever it is
that they're trying to promotein their business.
And I have to remind them, whatis your intention?
Yeah, if you're going out thereto brag on yourself, that
probably doesn't feel good.
If you're going out there toserve your clients and make sure
that they get this valuableinformation that they need, then
(05:04):
it's going to come across as,Confident, right?
You're going to be seen assupportive, caring, all those
good things.
So generally speaking, mostwomen, not all, but a good
portion of us have little tofear when it comes to being
overconfident.
And you know what?
Given my choice, I would ratherhave to reel you in than push
(05:28):
you to be more confident.
Now let's go ahead and look ather second question.
Were you always this confident?
confident.
And I had to laugh, not at her,of course, but at myself when
she said this, because just twonights earlier, I was practicing
the workshop that I had justdelivered in my home office.
(05:50):
I kept flubbing my words,forgetting the points I wanted
to hit on the slides, forgettinghow my stories tied back to
that specific key to improvingexecutive presence that I was
supposed to be describing.
And I came downstairs andcompletely deflated.
And my husband of course couldsense it.
So he asked me what's wrong.
(06:10):
And I went into that full innercritic beast mode.
It sucks.
The presentation sucks.
I suck.
It's too much info, not enoughmeat.
I don't know why I do this tomyself.
I need to stop signing up forspeaking gigs.
This is going to be a disaster.
And of course he looked at melike I had 10 heads.
He's like, Karin, I'm sure it'snot that bad.
(06:33):
You've been a paid speaker forfive years now.
You're always your worstcritic.
Besides, you got two days togo.
You'll be fine.
You always are.
And I wanted to believe him,but there was still a part of me
that was certain this was goingto tarnish my brand as a paid
speaker forever.
Sound familiar?
Has your inner critic gotten alittle too big for her britches?
(06:56):
Now, about this time, the womanthat I'm telling the story to
lets out an audible gasp.
And she goes, what?
Are you kidding me?
We all love this presentation.
It was so good.
And of course it was good,right?
Because I am a good speaker.
I practice the crap out of it,right?
(07:16):
There were so many reasons whythis would be good.
And that's not being cockyagain, right?
That's being confident.
That's trusting in ourselves.
That's believing that we can dothe things that we set out to
do.
So she said, well, what did youdo?
Wow.
Did you have the confidence tocome out here and deliver this
tonight if that's how you werefeeling two days ago?
(07:38):
And it was a great question,but it took me a minute to
answer because I forget thatsometimes what comes so easy to
me, correcting my mindset, doesnot come easy to others.
And so here's what I would havesaid if I'd had more time to
formulate a thorough answer.
For starters, I went back to mydefinition on confidence.
(08:01):
I could confidently show up anddeliver that presentation
because deep down I knew that Iwouldn't let myself down.
I trusted myself.
I also knew I'd rally for twodays until I knew every story,
every line, every bullet byheart.
I also knew that I'd inevitablyscrew up something because,
(08:24):
well, I'm human, but that Iwould learn in the process.
Therefore, it's all aworthwhile experience.
And that's why committing thisdefinition to memory or putting
it in your phone as a reminder,having it written in your
journal, somewhere that you cango back to is so important.
And you can always come back tothis when you need a confidence
(08:47):
boost.
But then I turned to some moretangible tactics.
I went and I read all of myreviews and testimonials from
past speaking gigs.
The ones with the five stars,the ones that talked about my
energy and how I made theaudience feel, the reviews that
commented on my knowledge andexpertise, just doing that one
(09:11):
little activity boosted myconfidence by 80%.
To get the last 20% of the waythere, I prepped, and prepped
during my remaining time.
I even showed up early on theday of the presentation to do a
dry run in the actual meetingspace before anyone else got
there.
I made sure I got dressed in mymost confident outfit with a
(09:34):
pair of snakeskin heels thatmade me feel like a badass.
Not actual snakeskin, just aprint.
No animals were harmed whileboosting my confidence.
And I sat my inner critic downfor a little heart to heart and
reminded her that I'd done a lotof research and worked on this
presentation for over a month.
It was solid and she needed toget on board with me.
(09:57):
And you can use thesestrategies to help you boost
your confidence too.
One of the benefits of being acoaching client of mine is that
you have access to me via Voxer,which is a free app in the app
store, that allows us to go backand forth in real time between
sessions.
And my clients love that theycan reach out to me for a pep
(10:19):
talk and help boosting theirconfidence when they need it.
But if you're not coaching withme, you can always get a
confidence mentor.
This is just someone who can bethat mirror for you and shine a
light on your talents andabilities, kind of how my
husband did when I was having mymeltdown.
They can point out when yourdoubts are unfounded and
(10:42):
encourage you to take that leapof faith when you need an extra
push.
Don't be afraid to ask afriend, a colleague, a spouse,
anyone who might be interestedin supporting you to be your
confidence mentor.
And it's so easy.
I'm sure even if you don't haveformal reviews or testimonials,
(11:06):
I'm sure you have some glowingperformance appraisals or some
emails that have been sent aboutwhat a great job you did at
your work or something, right,that you can go back to in those
moments when you're feeling alittle low that will boost up
your confidence.
All right, now let's go back toher other question, which was
(11:28):
how did you become so confident?
And that's why you're reallylistening to this episode, isn't
it?
Because you want to get thetips and the strategies that you
can employ today to boost yourconfidence and reclaim your
power.
Before I share them, I want youto remember that this is years
in the making, okay?
There is no silver bullet.
(11:48):
There's no overnight fix forconfidence.
But if you follow these tips,you can and you will improve
your confidence.
The first piece is positiveself-talk.
And I know that this is not thefirst time I've ever mentioned
this on the show, but there's noother way around it, right?
(12:09):
You have to stop speaking sonegatively to yourself.
If you have a negative thought,you need to catch yourself.
You need to shut it down andthen feed your brain something
nice.
Oh, Karin, you can't leavecorporate and run a business.
You don't know the first thingabout running a business.
(12:29):
Hey, it wasn't nice to talk tome like that.
I didn't know how to work incorporate once upon a time
either, and I learned how to dothat pretty well.
I know I could learn to run abusiness and succeed.
Bam, shut down, just like that.
And if you're an advancedstudent, you'll create a list of
(12:50):
confidence-boosting positiveaffirmations, and you will
repeat them daily.
Yes, daily for at least 30days.
It's gonna take that long.
You've got a lot ofconditioning and a lot of
rewiring to do, right?
If you are prone to thatnegative talk, it's gonna take
some time to get into that newrhythm.
So be aware, catch yourself assoon as you see what you're
(13:14):
doing, shut it down, replace itwith a positive thought and have
those daily affirmations.
And I'm telling you, the morepositive talk you can give
yourself, you become yourbiggest cheerleader. The second
thing you can do is to act asif.
Now I talk about this in mybook, Grab Life by the Dreams,
(13:37):
as fake it till you make it.
And essentially what this meansis that you're going to ask
yourself the question, whatwould the most confident,
successful version of me do inthis situation?
And then you go do that thing.
The most confident, successfulversion of me would start that
podcast and stop worrying aboutthe tech or stop worrying about
(14:00):
if anybody's going to listen orstop worrying about if I'll have
enough to say, right?
The most confident, successfulversion of me would just press
record and start getting thoseepisodes done.
The most successful, confidentversion of me would quit my six
figure job and figure out how tolead that business and how to
replace my corporate income.
The most confident, successfulversion of me would write that
(14:23):
book that's been on my heart for10 years and put pen to paper
and hire an editor and invest inmyself right i cannot tell you
how many times this one simplelittle question has gotten me
unstuck and moving forward andwhen you believe in you others
will believe in you that's whyconfidence is so powerful it's
(14:46):
also very magnetizing you knowwhen you see someone who is
confident you are just drawn tothem and I know that you want to
have that same effect in yourlife as well.
Okay the next tip I want to runby you is own it and you might
be like what do you mean by ownit you have to stop dwelling on
what you don't possess Theskills, the title, the money,
(15:12):
the possessions, whatever it isyou're harping on that you think
you don't have and need, let itgo.
Shift your focus to what you dohave.
The skills you possess, thematerial goods you do own, the
money that you do have in yourbank account, the title that you
(15:33):
do currently have.
Own who you are.
and where you are in yourjourney.
And the sooner you start doingthat, the sooner you're gonna
display self-confidence.
Because when you are in a placewhere you are just constantly
like, well, I don't have this,I'm not good enough, you just
can never feel like you're goodenough.
(15:55):
So I really wanna challengeyou.
If you were gonna stake a claimtoday on who you are, what are
all the amazing qualities andtalents and abilities that you
have?
Make a list of that, own it,focus on those, leverage those
to get where you want to go.
(16:16):
And the next thing you can dothat's gonna really boost your
confidence is celebrate youraccomplishments.
I tell you, as women, weusually do a really bad job at
this.
We achieve something and thenwe just move on to the next
thing with little more than aquick like, oh yeah, we got that
done, okay, next.
but that's the quickest way toforget how amazing you are.
(16:39):
You know, the other night aftermy presentation, I celebrated
my accomplishment.
It was nothing crazy.
I treated myself to a beer onmy couch and I don't really
drink very often.
So it was a huge treat.
It was a hot, hot summer nightand a German Pilsner just
sounded so delicious.
I had one that was it, but itwas just like the perfect way to
(17:00):
unwind and be like, you did it.
You got through this and youcould do it again.
I really wanted to make surethat my brain had something to
connect to my success and to beaware of that and to remind my
inner critic, remember you werefreaking out about nothing.
When you do this, it helps youclaim your power and boost your
(17:23):
confidence.
So is there something recentlyin your life that you have
forgotten to celebrate?
Go ahead and celebrate it now.
It's not too late.
Do a little something.
It doesn't have to cost muchmoney.
It doesn't have to be anythingextravagant, but just a little
something to tell your brain andconnect that amazing success
with the reward.
So I hope this helps you seethat confidence is a skill.
(17:49):
It is a muscle that can bebuilt and strengthened.
You're not alone if you don'tfeel as confident as you want
to.
Most women don't, but we justkeep putting one foot in front
of the other and pressingforward.
forward.
As you heard, I was not alwaysthis self-confident.
I still struggle with it fromtime to time.
But now you have some tools andstrategies to help you build
(18:15):
your confidence and pull it backup when you feel like you're in
a slump.
And of course, if you're askingthe question, how do you
portray confidence without beingseen as cocky or overconfident,
you're probably at zero risk ofdoing that.
So you can keep calm and beconfident.
Thanks for listening and keepflexing your confidence muscle.
(18:36):
Thanks for tuning in.
I hope you're inspired to takeaction by committing to one of
the tips or strategies we talkedabout in today's episode.
If you want more accountabilityand support, I've got your
back.
Book a complimentary empoweredexit strategy call today.
Visit karinfreeland.com tolearn more and book your
(18:58):
45-minute session.
Until next time,stay fabulous.
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