May 23, 2025 • 77 mins
Here's the edited release of Tales from Romanistan: A Night of Romani Storytelling, our first live show, in New Orleans, LA at Cafe Istanbul, 3/28/2025!
Hosted by Paulina Stevens and Jezmina Von Thiele, Produced by Bimbo Yaga, Cast includes Tsarina Hellfire, Moonbear, Milly Raccoon, Bimbo Yaga, and our editor and musician, Viktor! Photos by Arian Aragon. Special thanks to our cast, crew, and everyone who attended! Special shoutout to the sweet couple who flew in from Ohio! And thank you to our sponsors for this event, Weiser Books and Emerald Comics Distro.
Jezmina's poem "White Caravan" first appeared in Zoeglossia.
Thank you for listening to Romanistan podcast.
You can find us on Instagram, TikTok, and Facebook @romanistanpodcast, and on Twitter @romanistanpod. To support us, Join our Patreon for extra content or donate to Ko-fi.com/romanistan, and please rate, review, and subscribe. It helps us so much.
Follow Jez on Instagram @jezmina.vonthiele & Paulina @romaniholistic.
You can get our book Secrets of Romani Fortune Telling, online or wherever books are sold. Visit romanistanpodcast.com for events, educational resources, merch, and more. Please support our book tour fundraiser if you can.
Email us at romanistanpodcast@gmail.com for inquiries.
Romanistan is hosted by Jezmina Von Thiele and Paulina Stevens
Conceived of by Paulina Stevens
Edited by Viktor Pachas
With Music by Viktor Pachas
And Artwork by Elijah Vardo
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:07):
hi everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
You're about to listen to our first ever live
podcast recording in new orleans, yay we are going to be jumping
in from time to time with ourlittle commentary, kind of like
in the old school dvd commentary, if y'all remember that, and we
(00:29):
will be in the back of yourmind.
Some of our transitions don'ttranslate as well into our
podcast, but don't worry, we'llbe around to fill you in with
what's going on yeah, some actslike, for instance, dance
numbers, might not translate sowell and maybe we don't have the
rights to the music, so we willtell you what happens.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
But we have so much happening Lots of people talking
, interviews and things that youcan listen to and we are going
to input a few recordings ofjust the pieces raw for you to
hear.
So don't worry, there's plentyto enjoy.
But let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Welcome to Romanistan .
Speaker 1 (01:26):
We're your friendly neighborhood gypsies.
I'm Paulina and I'm Jez and yay.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Everyone, we are so happy tohave you.
This is our very first livepodcast recording for our very
first festival, so this is partof our Welcome to Romanistan
(01:51):
Festival and we are sharing ourpodcast, which has been created
to celebrate, uplift andspotlight Romani people and
creators from all backgroundsthere will be music, dancing,
drag poetry and a little bit ofgypsy magic.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
But why are we actually here?
Speaker 1 (02:15):
We're here because of the festival and we just wanted
to bring this to you as a liveexperience, so you get to
participate in one of ourfavorite pastimes, which is
storytelling, and there are somany ways to tell a story, and
for so long, because of diasporaand lack of education resources
(02:38):
, we have been an oral tradition, and so this is a really fun
example of what we do when wetell stories in our own ways.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
And what a better way to celebrate Romani culture
than a you know, a variety showstarring talented queer and
trans Romani performers.
Also, I wanted to ask you guysdo does anybody know who Romani
people are?
You may have heard of us.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Show of hands.
How many of you know who Romaare?
We expected it from this room.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
How about Gypsies?
Have you guys heard of Gypsies?
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (03:18):
and so you know we like to give a little history.
You might already know this,especially if you're here, and
we so appreciate that, butbasically, roma are a diasporic
ethnic group, originally fromIndia, but a long time ago, and
so Roma people left India aroundthe 10th century when the
Ghaznavid Empire was invadingand low-caste Indians and
(03:40):
migrants were rounded up tofight the invading army.
And so since then, since thewar was lost and the army was
likely captured and brought west, roma have been enduring really
interesting obstacles.
We've brought with us ourculture and our resilience and
our trades and our spiritualpractice and our language
throughout all these years, andwe've also survived 500 years of
(04:05):
slavery in present-day Romania,deportations, multiple
genocides, all types ofpersecution, and in that we have
created survival trades likeperformance and fortune-telling,
metalworking, horse trading,things that are often passed
down through our families, andPaulina and I recently wrote
Secrets of Romani FortuneTelling together to share what
(04:27):
that is like.
We have a beautiful merch tableover there with treats from our
cast, as well as handmade tarotbags, if you wanted something
to store your tarot decks in.
Go wander over there.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
You guys have also.
You may have heard of thestereotype of the gypsy fortune
teller, and it is a stereotype,but we just so happen to be
gypsy fortune tellers.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
And first, just for a moment, the word gypsy too,
because we're throwing thataround a lot.
But you know again, I think weknow that you know, but gypsy is
one of those words that cameinto creation because when Roma
were moving from place to placein many, many centuries of
persecution, there was amisunderstanding somewhere down
the line.
Either we created that rumor orsomebody else did that.
(05:19):
We were from Egypt, and so alot of documents especially
around, like decrees limitingwhat Roma could do or even
deporting Roma, referred to usas Egyptians, and so it's one of
those words that it's been usedas a slur, especially in
America.
If you're Roma, use it all youwant, or don't use it.
If you're not Roma, no need tosay it, because it is a
complicated word.
(05:39):
We both grew up saying it andwe're going to use it really
casually because it's likeyou're in our living room, roma
have a culture of hospitalityand we're inviting you in.
But yeah, it just that's a wordthat can be a little confusing.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Yes, and we'll tell you guys a little bit more about
ourselves.
So I am a Romani gypsy from theMachuaya subgroup and I had an
arranged marriage when I was 14.
I don't know, I'm sorry.
I was engaged at 14.
I was married at 17, and Ididn't really go to school.
(06:14):
Also, the only job I was reallyallowed to do was
fortune-telling, and so that'sjust kind of what I continue to
do.
I actually left my closedcommunity and I opened a
holistic wellness business, andwe also do the Romani podcast,
where we lift the voices ofRomani people from around the
(06:35):
world and other allies andobviously our book.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
So, yeah, yeah, and you might have found Paulina
through the podcast by the LATimes Foretold which tells your
whole story of, you know,leaving your arranged marriage
and fighting for custody and allof that.
So if you haven't heard that,you must Forgot about that.
Yeah, we fill in each other'sbios a lot.
It's hard to talk aboutyourself.
So I grew up in New Hampshire.
(07:01):
I mixed and assimilated.
I grew up in New Hampshire.
I am mixed and assimilated.
My grandmother comes from aSinti family, which is just
another subgroup of Romanipeople, and she grew up in Nazi
Germany, hiding her ethnicity inplain sight, which was very
complicated, and so when shecame to the US she really was
not planning on sharing herculture.
(07:23):
She didn't really share thatmuch with my mom and her
siblings until they were grown.
But when I was born she wasreally afraid that her cultural
connection, her knowledge youknow everything she carried with
her from the trades to you know, spiritual practices and
everything else would be lost.
And so my grandmother startedteaching me and everything else
would be lost.
And so my grandmother startedteaching me fortune telling as a
(07:46):
trade when I was about fouryears old, and so I was raised
the way that maybe my mother andher siblings would have been
had there not been such pressureto assimilate, especially after
the war.
And now I am a writer.
I read tarot, palm and tealeaves for clients individually.
(08:08):
I also love to do a party.
I love to be at a gala, Iperform a lot with Poetry
Brothel Boston and I do somespoken word, and I love to teach
divination workshops, holdrituals online and in person,
and I do a lot of creativecoaching as well.
(08:28):
So we are so excited to bringyou our beautiful cast tonight
and we are also doing a lot ofperformances all throughout the
weekend, and so keep an eye onwhat we're up to.
But our performers tonight comefrom a variety of backgrounds
and experiences and, becausethis is still a live podcast
(08:49):
recording, we're going to dowhat we do best.
We're going to interview, atiny little interview with each
performer about theirfascinating bios, and then we
will send them off into theiracts, and we are also going to
have a little burlesque, alittle drag, and so you know
consent is key.
You are welcome to tell theperformers how much you love
them by applauding and tippingthem generously, but no touching
(09:13):
, and if the performer comesaround to you and goes to touch
you.
You're welcome to say no thankyou, or you can just enjoy the
moment, but please hands toyourself.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
But you can touch their hearts with your cash.
Yes, you can just enjoy themoment, but please hands to
yourself.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But you can touch their hearts with your cash.
Yes, you can.
We have a tip bucket rightthere that goes right to our
hearts.
And so, let's see, we wanted tointroduce our first person
who's been performing this wholetime for us.
This is Victor, our editor andmusical producer for Romanesan
Podcast.
He is our token gajo fortonight and he specializes in
(09:52):
flamenco fusion guitar,injecting flamenco musicality
and techniques into hisperformance.
Victor is also asinger-songwriter and performs
in the New England area.
Performs in the New Englandarea.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Thank you, victor.
So I think we're going to havea great show, and I also want to
introduce one of our performersand our show producer for the
night, bimbo Yaga for the night.
Bimbo Yaga.
Bimbo Yaga is the trans MILF ofyour wet dreams.
(10:32):
Here to haunt your nightmareswith sensual spells of emotional
domination.
Bimbo Yaga.
Speaker 4 (10:41):
Are you going to?
Speaker 2 (10:41):
cast a spell on us tonight.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I certainly am gonna cast a spell on us tonight.
I certainly am going to cast aspell on you tonight, more of a
cord-cutting ritual, okay.
Speaker 4 (10:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
So yeah, Can you cut the cord?
Okay, oh, okay.
So one thing that we heardheard was we heard something
like an exorcism.
Like, did you used to dabble insomething like that?
Speaker 3 (11:10):
So yeah, cord cuttings are like a mini
exorcism for your soul, for yourheart.
But it's true, I was a teenageexorcist.
I learned the art and trade ofexorcism both from my family and
also I was apprenticed to aChristian mystic who did
hands-on healing in thespiritualist traditions when I
(11:33):
was 15.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Can you tell us details, please?
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Do you want to hear about my exploits and how I
stumbled into being a teenageexorcist?
Yes, yes, how I stumbled intobeing a teenage exorcist?
Yes, yes, well, I was studyingmusic with a woman whose name is
Liz McDevitt and my mother wasa good friend of hers and she
(11:58):
had a friend whose name wasJackie McCloskey.
She became my teacher.
I got a reading from JackieMcCloskey.
We traded readings.
So I was 15 years old and she'dnever met a gypsy before and I
had never met a gajo woman whohad done tarot card readings
before.
So I was like this is veryinteresting.
So we traded readings for fourhours and at the end of that
(12:21):
four hours I said, oh, I want tolearn more about what you do.
And she says, okay, cool, well,I'll take you out for chicken
wings.
My favorite meal is chickenwings.
And so she was like we'll gofor chicken wings and then, yeah
, we'll talk about you know whatI do, what you do.
So we get in the car and we'redriving to chicken wings and I
(12:45):
see the chicken wing place justdriving by and just you know,
we're passing the chicken wingplace and I said, oh, jackie, um
, there goes the chicken wings.
And she said, oh, no, I have tostop at a client's house first
before we get chicken wings.
And I said, oh, what kind ofclient?
And she, oh, just somebodywho's going through a hard time.
(13:05):
And I said, oh, that's so nice,this lady is nice, a very
generous spirit.
So we go to her client's housewhen I lived in Okeechobee,
florida.
If you're familiar with Florida, okeechobee, florida, is a very
po-dunky town in the middle ofnowhere, swamp.
So we went to the middle ofnowhere of the middle of nowhere
(13:27):
in Florida.
We're driving.
All of a sudden thestreetlights are gone, all of a
sudden the road is gone andwe're driving into somebody's
swamp home.
We get there, we pull up andI'm like, wow, this person, I
loved it.
I grew up in a swampy ruralarea too.
So I was like this is wild,wild.
So we get in there and sheopens the door.
She's like now, whatever you do, don't panic.
(13:48):
And I said what?
So we go in and I had never meta fully ascendantly possessed
person before.
This person was deeply taken bysomething.
Their face was contorted, theywere sweating, they were
(14:10):
spitting.
And Jackie said, oh, I haveyour medicine.
And the person was like fuckyou, basically, and I don't want
no medicine.
And I said, jackie, what's themedicine?
And she says, oh, you, you haveto figure out how to get this
thing out of this person.
So I performed an exorcismthrough laying of hands and with
(14:36):
the assistance of my teacher,jackie, and, long story short,
it was successful.
Yay.
So we leave the house.
I was not feeling very well andI said, jackie, I don't feel
very well.
And she said oh, don't worry,it'll be fine, Just give it a
(14:57):
mile or two.
So we drive a mile or two awayfrom the house and I said,
jackie, you have to pull over.
And she said oh, good girl.
So she pulls over, I open thedoor, I stumble out, I throw up.
This is a very gross story, bythe way, I love it.
Ok, I throw up all over theswamp and the side of the car
(15:17):
and I'm crying.
I can't even put to words howabsolutely magical it was,
though, because there'sfireflies and there's the
cicadas and there's all thefrogs in the swamp and there's
me hurling this spirit out of mybody and I was exercising.
(15:37):
And she picks me up and she'slike now, next time, don't suck,
it, don't swallow.
And I said, said, excuse me.
And so we get back in the carand she's like how about those
chicken wings?
So we went for chicken wings,and that's how I started my
apprenticeship as an exorcistwhen I was 15 years old.
(15:59):
But don't worry, tonight Iwon't be sucking or swallowing.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Only cutting, only cutting.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
All right, so Let me move over to this other
microphone.
Have you ever been in love?
Hmm, yeah, is anybody currentlyin love?
It's spring.
(16:39):
It's spring and love is in theair.
But in order for love to enteryour heart, sometimes you have
to make a little room for it.
Right, it's a little bit ofroom, so what?
we're gonna do tonight, if youconsent, is I'm going to lead us
(17:01):
through a cord-cutting spellFor anybody who has lingering
threads of energetic longing orregret or rage between them and
the heart of a former lover or aformer place that you lived, or
(17:22):
a part of your history, anaspect of your history that
you're struggling to move onfrom.
We're going to lovingly wrap itup, tie it up, and we're going
to pull it out of our heart sothat we can make some room for
the new things coming.
Does that sound nice?
Yeah, a little emotional springcleaning, right?
(17:45):
Y'all want to do something likethat?
Okay, well, I need a volunteer,and you're all are so far away.
I need one volunteer to yeah,yeah, so, jim buckle up, jim.
(18:07):
What I need you to do is grabthis and slowly take this around
to every person and everybody.
Just hold on to this thread.
Does that make sense?
Just weave it through?
No down.
Just the audience for now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know Imisinstructed you.
(18:28):
You got it.
You got it and then pass itaround.
So grab a little bit there yougo and then pass it around.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
While that's happening, I needeverybody to think about the
chords that they need cut, okay.
Okay to think about the chordsthat they need cut.
(18:50):
Okay, and I am going to read avery ancient, powerful gypsy
spell of chord cutting that Ihave right here in my little
book of gay poetry that I wrotewhen I was 20.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
Yes, you can applause for that.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
Has anybody written bad gay love poems or straight
love poems?
Anybody wrote bad love poems.
Raise your hands, okay.
So what I want you to do is, asI pour my heart out to you, I
want you to think about all thebad love poems you've ever
written.
And this is a breakup poem.
It was a very bad relationshipand a horrible breakup.
(19:37):
So while you're thinking about,these chords you need to cut,
I'm gonna cast this, spell youready.
Everybody got the thread.
Lilies of my learning, the sunin its blue and golden
(19:57):
generosity wasn't enough.
I still remember your cold,pushing back my lips, forcing my
teeth against my betterjudgment, even the crows, two by
three, dancing through the iceof your stair.
(20:18):
Well, they still sang caw, caw,caw.
My tongue lilted and theirwords were mine for a time, a
cacophony of you're so beautiful.
I forgot the sourness of yourfingers against my lips and the
(20:40):
paper cut kiss at the airport.
That meant goodbye.
Your baggage on the curb burnt,with my silence.
I was a little unhinged backthen.
A truth I boxed silent thatmaybe I was wrong to promise you
(21:02):
forever.
But what would you have saidhad you known that while you
packed your bags last night, ourlast night I busily tilled
under our garden that roses nolonger grow for you here, just
(21:27):
the lilies of my learning.
Applause, applause.
Now applaud you in thosemoments of writing terrible
breakup poetry.
I'm so proud of you.
Better out than in, better outthan in.
(21:47):
So I want you to think aboutthe cords you have to cut and
just grab your thread on eitherside, just wrap your hands
around and when you're readyjust break
it.
Just break it and have twoseparate pieces, or three or
(22:09):
seven.
Some of you have been sluts,little busy sluts.
I see you back there.
You have these two separatepieces of this thread.
Now, right, you can whipyourself, you can whip someone
with the other hand if you wouldlike, if they consent.
What I want you to do is I wantyou to gather up these threads
(22:39):
and just think that part of yourlife, think those relationships
, think yourself and thank Godyou've moved on.
Stick one in one pocket, excuseme, and one in the other pocket
.
And when you leave here tonighton your walk home, whenever you
(23:02):
feel inspired, take one pieceout and give it to the tree,
give it to a shrub, and thenlater take another piece out and
give it to another tree,another shrub, another piece of
beautiful green.
And when you do give theinvitation to the spirits that
(23:23):
tend to those trees and say makea better home for this than my
heart was, will you promiseyou'll do?
Just because you've cut thecord doesn't mean that these
pieces don't deserve care andopportunities for future
(23:44):
possibility.
Right, just not at my table,thank you.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Thank you, Bimbo.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
Yaga, give it up for Bimbo.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
Yaga, we are cleansed , we are cured.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
I do feel cured.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
That open space of all the love you can manage.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Thank you.
Thank you Wonderful.
Next we have Millie Raccoon.
Where are you, millie?
Come on over, come on over.
Trained by campfires and tavernjams all over the world, millie
(24:37):
Raccoon got her folk musicstart with traditional Turkish,
egyptian and Roma tunes for abelly dance troupe honoring Roma
heritage on her father's side.
Her current original music isinfluenced by classic country,
early jazz and other antiquatedAmericana.
There is a connecting thread ofspirituality, healing and
liberation weaving through herwork.
Let's welcome Millie with around of applause.
(24:59):
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Speaker 7 (25:05):
So our question to you in what way do you feel that
music heals you?
I think the way it's healed mepersonally is it's given me a
purpose and a community and apath in what was otherwise a
(25:27):
kind of isolating, directionlesslife.
I was estranged from my familypretty young, and so having a
connection with music and thepeople I was able to connect to
through that filled up a lot ofthose holes and fed my soul when
(25:50):
I first realized what washappening.
And it also gives me a sense ofbeing able to help other people
in some way, whether it'sinspiring or uplifting or even
just being relatable throughsong, because you know, a lot of
songwriters process theirridiculous situations through
(26:12):
song and it creates somethingbigger than themselves that
other people can take from aswell.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Thank you for sharing that.
Thank you so much.
Well, we can't wait to hear youperform yeah, whenever you're
ready.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
The way she cried, she lost her eyes.
Her lashes left her lids.
Speaker 8 (27:21):
Her prideful mind.
He could not find her lovinglips.
He did Her face.
(27:43):
She pressed into his chest,told him she must go.
It's in my mind to find a homeand a husband, for to know the
end is nigh and that is why I'mnot asking you to marry me.
(28:04):
The tides will turn and theearth will burn, and the wind
and sands will bury me.
She wandered for a hundredsongs Along the mountainside and
(28:28):
in the town she'd look aroundFor the ladies of the night.
She'd barter false affectionsfor food and feather bed.
She thought of her lost lover.
(28:55):
In the final words, he'd saidthe end is nigh and that is why
I'm not asking you to marry me.
The tides will turn, the earthwill burn and the wind and sands
(29:19):
will bury me.
She learned of flesh andpleasure her body.
Speaker 6 (29:29):
You could own.
Speaker 8 (29:44):
At night she sang so sweetly the other whores to hear
.
Speaker 4 (29:54):
They said go to the city lest fate imprison you here
she was given gifts aplenty bymen she did not know.
Speaker 8 (30:37):
But one who'd heard her singing gave her an old
banjo Soon she played forpayment, her freedom.
She had found Not whore norwife, but mighty bard.
(31:03):
She troubled the world around.
The end is nigh, and that iswhy I'm not asking you to marry
me.
The tides will turn, the earthwill burn and the wind and sands
(31:27):
will bury me.
She rose her song for forests,for trees, to give us bread, for
whales and fish in oceans thatgreed would put to death.
(31:50):
And when the earth was wholeagain, she'd find the love she
once knew and say I see theworld you saved, and now I'll
(32:11):
marry you.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
I'll marry you.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Thank you, millie Raccoon, everybody Chill.
Thank you so much, Millie.
What is the name of that songand how can people find your
music?
Speaker 7 (32:30):
That song is called the Tides Will Turn.
I have physical copies of CDsat the merch table, but also my
name is Millie, with a Y raccoonwith two Cs, and I'm on all the
things on the internet Spotify,youtube, everything, whatever
(32:53):
they are.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Wonderful.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Next we have Moonbear Agulad.
Welcome Moonbear.
Also known as Butylene O'Kipple, a gender expansive, two-spirit
artist and energy worker ofMexican indigenous North African
Romani and mixed oh sorry,north American Romani and mixed
(33:26):
European heritage.
Their 30-plus years as aperformer and musician continue
to be fueled by curiosity andself-discovery, while exploring
the intersections of ancestorveneration, energy work, dance,
mediumship and drag.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
So welcome Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
We would like to know what is the relationship
between divinity and drag inyour work.
Speaker 5 (33:56):
Do I not look divine?
Speaker 1 (33:58):
You do indeed, wearing a lowly scarf which you
can purchase over at the merchtable, diclo.
Speaker 5 (34:05):
Collective.
In my experience, the two havebeen very clearly intertwined in
my life.
I think there's something aboutskirting masculinity while also
averting transmisogyny that hasallowed me access to
(34:29):
transesters and ancestors thatwere finally able to see me in
my fullness, and so my spiritteam greatly expanded once I
started expressing myselfdifferently and really just
putting myself out there toperform in this way, and it's
been a journey of self-discovery.
(34:51):
All my performance is rooted inmy own life experience, so it's
always like a little piece ofmyself that I'm giving to the
audience and also for me it'svery much blended with what I
call the medicine of the momentand what's going on in the ether
, what's going on in the greaterculture, and how can I
(35:12):
reference that in a way thatsubverts expectations and brings
joy somehow, or catharsis orwhatever it is, to my audience.
And so it's all been one big,juicy, sticky, lovely mess.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
That is so gorgeous.
I love that, and we can't waitto see what you get up to.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
I'm very excited personally.
Okay, and I believe you'reperforming an interpretive drag
ensemble set to the poem WhiteCaravan, written by Jasmina in
honor of their mother after herdeath.
Speaker 5 (35:55):
Yeah, no stress.
I cannot wait and I will cry.
I probably will too.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Let's cry together, we're ready, we're ready, we're
about to listen to our very ownJez's poem, white Caravan, where
Moon Bear performs a dragtableau with music by Lady Baby
Miss.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
This was such a powerful performance.
So first, white Caravan is adeath fugue that I wrote after
my mother died and I wrote it inher voice.
Wrote it in her voice andMoonbearer did this incredible
performance where they seem likethey're coming home from work
(36:41):
after a long day and are veryslowly, slowly, undressing as
though in front of their vanityand are you know, braiding their
hair, their long dark hair, andjust acting out this very
emotional poem, and then at theend they cut their braids off
and I was just so moved I mean Ididn't start crying on stage,
(37:06):
but it was only by the grace ofGod.
I had never seen anyone performanything to anything I'd
written and it was just sopersonal.
And Moon Bear really didcapture my mother's energy, and
so I think she really would haveloved this.
Speaker 2 (37:23):
You guys can also check out some pictures of the
performance on our Instagram, atRomanistan Podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Yeah, also so, because we wanted to have a very
clear recording.
This recording that we'resharing with you is pre-recorded
of me reading the poem withLady Baby Miss's music, so
please enjoy.
White Caravan a death fugue inmy mother's voice.
(37:53):
A death fugue in my mother'svoice.
My white caravan clomps throughthe desert, color scorched
ecstatic.
The wagon burns because I'm hotshit.
(38:14):
My ancestors are diasporic,skull-polished, hard-knocking.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
I'll come to them around the fire, my red horse
waiting.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
I had nightmares of molars rolling over floorboards,
freed from their skeletonshelves, leaping like lentils in
a rattle German gypsy, ahandful of teeth I used to a
family legacy.
Every organ is hardening such arare disease.
Once my daughter spread mymother's playing cards across a
(39:12):
table, red and black, winkingwhat I already knew to cover the
mirrors very soon, mama do you?
have anything to ask the cards,yeah, what the fuck?
I never told fortunes like heror my mother, damn it.
(39:37):
I was an aerobics instructor,horse trainer, dog groomer.
I kept accounts.
I was a shop clerk leg salesgirl, bodybuilder, perfect score
GED when I was 30.
I could have kept going.
Something stopped me.
(40:12):
My skin thickened over my littlewagonavan door, blessed above
with a horseshoe and bells, Iinvite the soot of evening to
cover, throw pillows and scartissue to smother me good like a
measured father Develep, like ameasured father devla, my white
(40:40):
father peddled me while mygypsy mother froze like a fawn
in the light of a new country, anew language, she leaned into
horror, weaned on the Naziregime, fresh off the boat into
the arms of her own privatetyrant.
Horse-drawn teacups, shudder,all porcelain and wet leaves
(41:10):
clattering down my calcifiedlungs as I breathe and breathe.
I used to stand on my redhorse's back as she galloped,
our hair braided.
Now watch the pinchers of thescorpion weave getting closer to
(41:37):
me.
That's the boxer I would bet on.
And who can forget the sting?
I'm looking for death.
The beautiful woman who willstop my wagon and take me where
the dunes open to reveal acompressed gem of endings where
sand closes over my head.
(41:57):
As I look up at the night'sbody, the moon is a tendon-rod
joint for me to scream at.
Once I loved her and only spokesoft words Lachy, lachachi.
Goddess of the good, I'mentitled to my anger and my
(42:23):
angels.
When scorpions crack from theirbacks, rise between my busted
spokes, they are, for three days, delicate.
I have always been so delicateand no one has treated me that
(42:48):
way.
I am transforming, spitting upthe black shell.
I am playing with my medication.
I am bored of this business ofsickening.
My mother says I was born withone foot on the other side
(43:10):
because I could see spirits andpredict the deaths of everyone I
met.
I've been saying I'd like tojump in with both feet.
I'll go out with sirens blaring, flooding the desert inside me,
blue and red, my daughter andmy husband frantic, breathing me
(43:36):
with their hands.
I'll go out on a new moon inaugust when the prayer fire
burns outside, just after mydaughter asks for my healing at
the edge of the woods.
Beliefs have never healed meand if I were to be buried, I
(43:57):
would be buried standing.
Instead, I will burn withungodly clacking.
When I am decanted, I will beash blown back into my
daughter's hair as she prays meinto her meadow grass and ocean
(44:17):
water, with whiskey and flowers,mixed in with the old ash of my
red horse, her breath blowinghot, carrying me off, and I will
be her ancestor working an oldtrade, a good job.
I feel better guiding her fromhere.
Thank you so much.
(44:53):
You know, my mother reallyloved two things, and that was
drag and attention, and I justcan't imagine a better way to
pay tribute.
Thank you so much.
Thank you, moon Bear.
We are going to take a littleintermission.
(45:13):
Please feel free to refreshyour drink and we will be back
in just a few minutes.
We can do it before the play.
Yeah, yeah, awesome, thanks.
So we're playing it right here.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (45:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 4 (45:34):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah .
Speaker 3 (45:43):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:57):
Welcome back to Romanistan.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
We're your friendly neighborhood gypsies, actually.
We're your friendlyneighborhood gypsies actually,
millie Raccoon.
So if you can make your way, wehave another question for you,
(46:30):
though.
Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, okay.
So you've played everywhere,from taverns to belly dance
stages.
What's the wildest or mostunexpected place your music has
taken you?
Speaker 7 (46:51):
So I can kind of turn this question inside out or my
answer, because I think it'skind of ordinary for me to play
in wild places and I've playedall kinds of really wild places
all over the world and someplaces where people think I'm a
little strange and surprising,and so I would say the place
(47:16):
that I least fit in, that I everplayed was at this country
music festival in rural Nebraskafor farmers.
And the connection of why I wasthere in the first place is
because I play country music andso I was like that'll be cool.
(47:38):
But I was about to do this songfor them called the Saturn
Return of the Country Witchesand it's about farmers who are
witches and I wasn't thinkingthat hard about it.
They're kind of very likeconservative Christian people
and all I said was, oh, I'mgonna do this song about these
(48:01):
two farmers that I know and it'sreally neat to be playing for
this festival of all farmersbecause I'm from the city and I
don't really know that manyfarmers and it was just like
completely silent and they justlike did not like me once I said
that it was very clear that Iwas.
(48:22):
They weren't my target audiencenecessarily.
Speaker 2 (48:25):
But I still did the song that does sound pretty wild
, so so.
You can perform.
Speaker 1 (48:34):
Amazing segue, Paulina, but that does sound
pretty pretty wild.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah, it's tough when you'rewith a tough audience.
I bet you nailed it, though.
Speaker 8 (48:44):
Thank, you Addicted to the sadness I feed it till it
(49:51):
grows Larger than my destiny.
A fork in every road, a fork inevery road.
I'm a slave to my freedom.
Every road, a fork in everyroad I'm a slave to my freedom
can never be tied down.
I run around in circles, awayfrom where I'm bound, away from
(50:13):
where I'm bound, my mother andmy sister's about to die of
thirst.
To be a better human, or try tosave the earth.
Try to save the earth.
I'm a wolf in sheep's clothing.
(50:34):
Everywhere I go, they put me inthe madhouse if they knew what
I know, knew what I know Thank,you Got all these superpowers.
(51:37):
Only myself to save.
I rescue all the villains toprove that I am brave.
To prove that I am brave, Ichoose the meanest teachers, the
fastest way to learn.
The body of a mother, wisdom ofa crow, wisdom of a crow.
(52:00):
They pretend they don't knowbetter, like they don't know the
rules.
I'm building a secret lair Deepbelow their souls, deep below
their souls.
I'm waiting in the darkness,praying the sun won't rise.
(52:22):
One day I'll rise up, singing.
I'm taking root to fly, takingroot to fly, thank you.
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Amazing Millie.
Thank you so much.
Ten out of ten Ten out of ten.
You can, of course, tip ourperformers Welcome back from our
intermission.
Thank you so much for everyonecoming back.
We are so excited to bring MoonBear back to the stage.
Woo, woo, woo.
Applause for Moon Bear.
Welcome back.
(53:55):
Woo, woo, woo, woo.
And we are so excited to askyou another question, because
this is still a Romanistanpodcast, even though we have a
much more exciting format.
We'll have to do this again.
Speaker 5 (54:11):
So much to talk about .
Speaker 1 (54:13):
So much to talk about .
So we would like to know, inall of your years of walking
between worlds as a medium, whatis the most dramatic or bizarre
way a spirit has revealeditself to you?
Speaker 5 (54:30):
Oh, that's a fun one, I would say.
I think it was in my third yearactually studying with Bimbo
Yaga, who's also my witch mom wethis was, I think, maybe 2000.
So, like stuff had already shutdown and we weren't doing like
(54:53):
in person visits, you know.
But that was like that wouldhave been the time that we would
have started doing like, thetime that we would have started
doing like you know, in-personvisits, and um, we did so.
So we were doing remote visits,um, for a, an apartment
building on Capitol Hill inSeattle which I'm familiar with.
I had done work in the buildingbefore um, and so for many
(55:15):
reasons I was insecure.
You know about like a doinglike a distance, uh, reading
like that, you know, or it'slike halfway across the city, uh
, and you're like, well, is thisgonna work?
you know, um, and impostersyndrome and what have you of
course, of course relatable andso, um, we were assigned little
teams in our circle and I wasassigned, uh, the basement to
(55:38):
investigate and just see whatcomes up, you know.
And so we're doing our journeys.
You know, we're like we eachkind of like splintered off and
we were investigating in our ownways and I was like mm-hmm, and
Beyonce started like playing inmy head.
I was like, I was like, oh my,my gosh, I'm totally doing this
(56:01):
wrong.
You know, I'm completelydistracted.
I just want to, you know,listen to beyonce, apparently,
and and and, but.
But then we come back and, uh,you know, everybody's giving
their like amazing insights andyou know, uh, it was like oh
yeah, this lines up with whatthe client said, and blah, blah,
blah.
And then I, finally, I was justlike, okay, so spirit was
(56:23):
singing Beyonce.
It was like, and specificallyto the left, to the left,
everything you own in a box tothe left.
And um, oh right, and we wereon a video call with the client
you know the manager of thisbuilding and her face just kind
of dropped and and and she waslike, uh, to the left of the
(56:44):
basement there had been a tenantthat passed away in his
apartment above that and no onefound him.
So he disintegrated and thefloor came through and all of
his stuff had still been fallenthrough the floor, just to the
left of the entrance of the tothe basement, and it was an old
(57:09):
bag so he was literally like uh,could you get my stuff out of
the basement?
finally, and I would love tomove on, so and he told you
through songs.
Speaker 1 (57:21):
Yeah, through.
Speaker 5 (57:22):
Beyonce songs through what a character yeah, yeah
that's incredible and alsohorrifying and upsetting, and
like oh, truly, truly.
Speaker 1 (57:33):
But I love the sense of humor honestly right, yeah, I
know, yeah and know.
Speaker 5 (57:38):
If who can't gaslight you but a spirit, yeah, wow.
Speaker 1 (57:44):
That was incredible.
Thank you so much for sharingthat.
So, you are about to do anotherperformance for us.
I think that is so nice of you.
Speaker 5 (57:51):
So this is like, uh, this is like the breath of like
kind of what I do as a dragqueen, Like I take what I do
seriously but not myselfseriously in any kind of way.
Speaker 1 (58:01):
You can't take yourself too seriously, right?
Speaker 5 (58:03):
I always fuck it up when I do and uh, and so
sometimes, like wheneverpossible, I'll do something like
really deep and gut-wrenching,you know, such as like uh,
beautiful poetry written about avery intimate time an ode to my
dead mom in front of me.
Speaker 1 (58:18):
Yeah, amazing.
Speaker 5 (58:20):
And sometimes what we all need is just a gay anthem,
just like that song in the clubthat you know all the words to
and you just need to scream itin your underwear with your
friends or whatever.
So this is a little example ofthe latter.
It's not too serious, it's justkind of silly, but if you know
(58:42):
the words you should sing alongwe can't wait moon bear gave an
amazing performance, lip singingto robin's, dancing on my own
in a slightly ruined prom dress.
Speaker 2 (58:55):
Unfortunately, we can't play the whole song due to
copyright issues, but you canjust imagine how the rest goes.
Speaker 1 (59:02):
Thank you.
Oh, my god, give it up for MoonBear.
Oh, amazing.
Well, we have a very specialact for you, who we are not
going to introduce because shedoes not need an introduction
introduce, because she does notneed an introduction.
(59:25):
Next we have Serena Hellfire,the Mae West of the French
Quarter, and she gave anincredible burlesque performance
in a red and black ensemble,dripping in jewels, wearing a
crown very vampire-esque energy,and she was just incredible.
Unfortunately, we cannot shareall the magical things she did
(59:50):
with fans and her gestures andglances, but she does give such
a fun interview and you'll justhave to catch her in New Orleans
yourself, or really?
She travels all over the world,so you could probably find her
anywhere.
You just have to time it in NewOrleans yourself, or really?
She travels all over the world,so you could probably find her
anywhere.
You just have to time it rightwith the gods.
Oh, my goodness, thank you somuch for being here.
(01:00:25):
Fuck that wig.
Fuck that wig.
Speaker 2 (01:00:35):
Everyone just witnessed the May West of the
French Quarter.
Witness the Mae West of theFrench Quarter.
Serena Magdalena Hellfire hasbeen on behind and in front of
the stage professionally since2002.
She is a queer, sinti, gitano,kale, roma, gypsy witch and
(01:00:59):
performance artist.
She less vampire cabaret, swingnight at always lounge cabaret
and many other productions inthe beautiful city of new
orleans.
She is also one of the maincrew members of the
international endless nightfestival, baby, the inner
vampire court since 2011,.
(01:01:21):
And Madam Hellfire has sungwith the slick, skillet
serenaders.
So, serena, your name aloneconjures fire and death
priestess lineage.
How do you channel yourwitchcraft and vampiric energy
(01:01:42):
into your performances and areyou casting spells on us right
now on stage?
Speaker 6 (01:01:48):
Well, I mean, the wig did come off and I always roll
around with a head covering.
So probably, yes, maybe ofcourse.
I'm so excited to see both ofyou and be in this beautiful
space with all of you sexywitches.
Yeah, oh, my God, goodness,where to begin?
(01:02:12):
Let's see, I started reallysinging and dancing when I was
this big.
Sorry, this big Fans are in theway.
How I channel everything?
I have a very regimentedmorning ritual.
(01:02:33):
I do cards with the cats andElva knows it's like, hey, guess
what I'm doing.
And the cats actually sit onthe cards that I'm supposed to
pay attention to.
I have four altars.
I do a lot of death and ancestorwork.
That is my lineage here in NewOrleans.
(01:02:56):
It's kind of we're a portalanyway, so it's we're either
partying or celebratingsomeone's death or just having a
good time.
So it's just been kind ofnatural for me and my family.
That's what we have always done.
How do I channel it?
Like this, we do all kinds oflike creating this festival.
(01:03:18):
Like creating this festival.
We have, like I personally do,so many shows where I talk about
death or I'm always some kindof intermissary.
Being from the realms, I'm adevotee of Hakate and Lilith and
Sarakali, and that's.
I feel like that's just what wedo, especially in these times.
Like so how I channel all thefire and rage and that stuff.
(01:03:45):
It's hard.
It's hard being a Romani queerwitch and not one to blow things
up, is that allowed?
But also these two over herewe've been doing some really fun
things called, you know, queerwitch cabaret, and we've been
really just kind of embodyinglike the four, you know the
(01:04:08):
quarterly, like four seasons,and just kind of recreating
those old myths, because theworld has forgotten and they
need to remember.
Get this microwave for me, orI'm just going to take over the
show.
I'm so excited to finally seeyour faces.
I know, it's like I just tookmy wig off.
(01:04:29):
my titties are out it's like Ijust kind of wanted to do some
floor work, but I know if I getdown on the floor she's not
coming up oh gosh, we have onemore question for you.
Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
What role does glamour magic play in your work
on the stage, your time off thestage?
Speaker 6 (01:04:53):
I'm kind of good at that.
I don't know if you've noticed,I really do like blurring the
lines between reality andfantasy and I've been doing that
since I was a kid.
I am heavily versed in therealm of the theater and it
(01:05:13):
really kind of anytime.
So the reason why I'm reallykind of weird about like get
ready at the venue and I'm likeI cannot because I literally
have a whole space in my housewhere I literally channel that
character and I channeled it myancestor, altar, is literally
right next to my boudoir andMagdalena helps me put on this
(01:05:35):
face.
So that's, that is how I dothis.
It's all glamour.
It's all glamour and hellfire.
Is that a show?
Tops are talking right, glamourand hellfire.
Speaker 1 (01:05:50):
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for sharing your magic
and your gifts with us.
We're so happy to see you.
No, it needed to Everyone.
Please a round of applause forthe infamous Zarina Hellfire.
Thank you.
Paulina and I are going to becrossing the lines from hosts to
(01:06:25):
performers for just a brief,brief, little interlude.
I hope you will indulge us.
Paulina will be beginning withtwo short poems.
Speaker 2 (01:06:36):
I've actually never read poetry out loud.
Speaker 1 (01:06:39):
Let's do a little round of applause for Paulina,
because we've gotta celebrateyour first time.
Speaker 2 (01:06:49):
So the first one is for anyone who's ever smoked a
blunt the warm, thick, brownbetween my fingertips, ashes
falling on my hips, fire burningon my lips at the tip,
(01:07:10):
overstuffed just enough.
Not my lover or my friend, I'llstill crave you till the end.
One more short one, okay.
He said I miss the old you.
(01:07:31):
I said I thought I told you Oldme was the broke me, old me was
lonely, old me was below me,old me don't even know me, but
old me still got a hold on me.
Speaker 1 (01:07:52):
New me said screw me.
Even new me outgrew me.
Thank you so much, paulina.
What a wonderful experience, ohmy goodness.
Speaker 2 (01:08:03):
So now Paulina is going to introduce me, because
I'm going to read some poems too.
Everyone give a round ofapplause for Jess Jasmina
Bontila.
Hello.
Speaker 1 (01:08:19):
I am gathering my poems.
Can you hear me, okay?
Amazing.
So my first poem is called theHermit and it is inspired by the
tarot card.
(01:08:40):
Babe, I'm in the woods.
You keep calling them yourwoods, your woods, and the
fond-nose.
Possession is not affection.
Let me hold up my lantern toyour bullshit.
I've been living in the margins, illuminating a manuscript of
human folly and hope, of dragonschasing rabbits and rabbits
(01:09:02):
wielding hatchets.
My whimsy is not for humanconsumption.
I think I'm human by mistake.
I think I'm gender by default.
I think I've been erased.
I keep seeing fascists when Ileave the woods.
Keep seeing why my grandmothertold me to never tell anyone
(01:09:25):
we're gypsies and I toldeveryone we're gypsies.
When so much of your family diesand so much of your country is
just killing you, you might begrateful that your survivors
have not survived to see this.
You might live among the deerand step out on humankind.
(01:09:50):
Hold my lantern while I'mreclaimed by pines.
Let me draw you thigh deep intothe wetlands with the promise
of light.
Let me turn into a crane andbreak a rapist's arms.
Let me enact forest law.
I want to be left alone.
(01:10:14):
My body is moss and mushroomsthe only system I want to be a
part of.
Let me use my staff fordefensive magic or studying my
gait.
The woods age you, but in atimeless way.
Silver birch bark curling uplike snakes.
(01:10:38):
Society ravages you.
Gray hair doubled by a winterof billionaires throwing Nazi
salutes on autoplay.
A crow ate my phone and I amhere to lead you to madness.
Because you should not followme.
Follow the weird, earnestlantern glowing in your chest
(01:11:02):
into the woods, intoxicatinglydark, lit by bleeding heart
flower stalks.
Thank you so much.
My next poem is called LadyMacbeth.
Through my Gender Reveal Partyshe did.
(01:11:25):
When I was 12, my English classread Macbeth aloud from our
seats, rotating the parts untilthe lines sounded never smooth,
but not quite as bad as thefirst time we stumbled through.
Soon I got to play Lady Macbeth.
(01:11:46):
I had already read it and Iknew what I was in for.
I trembled like I was fallingin love.
I loved this terrible woman.
It's not unusual for the babyqueers to love a villain or for
the multi-ethnic kids toidentify with the outcast.
It was also that my motherconvinced me for weeks before
(01:12:11):
the play that the world wasgoing to end.
She made me recite all myregrets in the bathtub the night
.
It was to happen that I havenever been kissed, never been in
love, and all my sins againsther.
I stayed awake till sunrise,curled on the carpet beside her
(01:12:31):
bed, waiting for the comet toobliterate us and let heaven eat
my shame.
In the morning my mother wasunrepentant and acted as though
nothing had happened, and Isuppose in a way it hadn't.
Years later, when I was 19, mymother would fill the house with
gas and very casually try tokill us, and no one was
(01:12:55):
surprised.
We didn't even call the police,we just put her back to bed.
I was taught to love terribleand complicated women early.
But it wasn't even that.
It was actually the line whenLady Macbeth strode into the
forest because her husband wassuch a fucking pussy and she
yelled unsex me here to the darkspirits of the wood so they
(01:13:20):
could take her womaness and freeher to do what she must in an
English class at 1 30 pm, afterwe were all too sleepy from
chicken nuggets at lunch, Istood up when it was time, when
no one asked me to, and screamedUNSEX.
Speaker 8 (01:13:41):
ME HERE.
Speaker 1 (01:13:48):
It wasn't just that I was navigating abuse or that I
thought taking my girl skin offmight save me from my cousins
the cannibals, it wasn't that.
Unsex ME HERE.
I wanted to say it over andover again like a chant, so
happy the trees had lifted LadyMacbeth's femininity from her
(01:14:09):
shoulders like a cloak thatdragged dead leaves behind her
so she could go and do hermurder.
I didn't want to murder, but Iwanted the forest to take me so
I could be the forest, formlessand powerful, an agent of
multiplicity, freedom and chaos.
(01:14:30):
Un-sex-me-here.
Lady Macbeth threw me thatgender reveal party before I
even knew what it was.
That gender reveal party beforeI even knew what it was.
My English teacher let me keepreading that part a couple of
more times until everyone in theseventh grade knew I was going
through something.
(01:14:51):
Thank you so much, everyone,for being here.
Give yourselves a round ofapplause for coming out to
(01:15:12):
support a really weird gypsyqueer trans podcast and variety
show from people you've neverheard of, who aren't in any way
famous, and yet we keep writingbooks and making weird stuff and
selling it in corners of bars.
Give yourself a hand for beingjust as weird and awesome as
(01:15:33):
everything out here.
Speaker 2 (01:15:35):
And if you all look under your chairs, you will find
we cast a dispel on you.
No, just kidding, you're cursed.
Speaker 1 (01:15:42):
Welcome to the family .
Thank you so much.
Thank you, thank you and thankyou so much to our incredible
cast.
Please support them, find themonline, tip them, buy their
stuff, go to their shows andthank you to Victor for scoring
the whole thing.
He's gonna edit this later.
(01:16:05):
It's going to be, great.
Thank you, victor.
Good night everyone.
Thank you so much for sharingour first live show with us.
(01:16:36):
We are so grateful to our cast,to bimbo yaga for producing.
I mean, every performer wasjust so incredible and also
thank you to everyone who cameout.
Some a really lovely coupleflew in all the way from ohio
and we were just so moved andexcited.
So thank you so much extra.
Speaker 2 (01:16:55):
Thank you guys yeah, we are totally like stunned and
so happy and and we appreciateyou guys as much as we can Like.
We have maximum appreciation.
We are mad.
Speaker 1 (01:17:09):
We love you so much, you, the max.
Yeah, it was such a blast, whata wonderful time, and we hope
to do it again someday.
Speaker 2 (01:17:18):
Yeah, and we hope you guys liked the show and we love
you to our listeners we do.
We love you very much.
hi everyone.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
You're about to listen to our first ever live
podcast recording in new orleans, yay we are going to be jumping
in from time to time with ourlittle commentary, kind of like
in the old school dvd commentary, if y'all remember that, and we
(00:29):
will be in the back of yourmind.
Some of our transitions don'ttranslate as well into our
podcast, but don't worry, we'llbe around to fill you in with
what's going on yeah, some actslike, for instance, dance
numbers, might not translate sowell and maybe we don't have the
rights to the music, so we willtell you what happens.
Speaker 1 (00:49):
But we have so much happening Lots of people talking
, interviews and things that youcan listen to and we are going
to input a few recordings ofjust the pieces raw for you to
hear.
So don't worry, there's plentyto enjoy.
But let's get started.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Welcome to Romanistan .
Speaker 1 (01:26):
We're your friendly neighborhood gypsies.
I'm Paulina and I'm Jez and yay.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Everyone, we are so happy tohave you.
This is our very first livepodcast recording for our very
first festival, so this is partof our Welcome to Romanistan
(01:51):
Festival and we are sharing ourpodcast, which has been created
to celebrate, uplift andspotlight Romani people and
creators from all backgroundsthere will be music, dancing,
drag poetry and a little bit ofgypsy magic.
Speaker 2 (02:11):
But why are we actually here?
Speaker 1 (02:15):
We're here because of the festival and we just wanted
to bring this to you as a liveexperience, so you get to
participate in one of ourfavorite pastimes, which is
storytelling, and there are somany ways to tell a story, and
for so long, because of diasporaand lack of education resources
(02:38):
, we have been an oral tradition, and so this is a really fun
example of what we do when wetell stories in our own ways.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
And what a better way to celebrate Romani culture
than a you know, a variety showstarring talented queer and
trans Romani performers.
Also, I wanted to ask you guysdo does anybody know who Romani
people are?
You may have heard of us.
Speaker 1 (03:07):
Show of hands.
How many of you know who Romaare?
We expected it from this room.
Speaker 2 (03:12):
How about Gypsies?
Have you guys heard of Gypsies?
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (03:18):
and so you know we like to give a little history.
You might already know this,especially if you're here, and
we so appreciate that, butbasically, roma are a diasporic
ethnic group, originally fromIndia, but a long time ago, and
so Roma people left India aroundthe 10th century when the
Ghaznavid Empire was invadingand low-caste Indians and
(03:40):
migrants were rounded up tofight the invading army.
And so since then, since thewar was lost and the army was
likely captured and brought west, roma have been enduring really
interesting obstacles.
We've brought with us ourculture and our resilience and
our trades and our spiritualpractice and our language
throughout all these years, andwe've also survived 500 years of
(04:05):
slavery in present-day Romania,deportations, multiple
genocides, all types ofpersecution, and in that we have
created survival trades likeperformance and fortune-telling,
metalworking, horse trading,things that are often passed
down through our families, andPaulina and I recently wrote
Secrets of Romani FortuneTelling together to share what
(04:27):
that is like.
We have a beautiful merch tableover there with treats from our
cast, as well as handmade tarotbags, if you wanted something
to store your tarot decks in.
Go wander over there.
Speaker 2 (04:43):
You guys have also.
You may have heard of thestereotype of the gypsy fortune
teller, and it is a stereotype,but we just so happen to be
gypsy fortune tellers.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
And first, just for a moment, the word gypsy too,
because we're throwing thataround a lot.
But you know again, I think weknow that you know, but gypsy is
one of those words that cameinto creation because when Roma
were moving from place to placein many, many centuries of
persecution, there was amisunderstanding somewhere down
the line.
Either we created that rumor orsomebody else did that.
(05:19):
We were from Egypt, and so alot of documents especially
around, like decrees limitingwhat Roma could do or even
deporting Roma, referred to usas Egyptians, and so it's one of
those words that it's been usedas a slur, especially in
America.
If you're Roma, use it all youwant, or don't use it.
If you're not Roma, no need tosay it, because it is a
complicated word.
(05:39):
We both grew up saying it andwe're going to use it really
casually because it's likeyou're in our living room, roma
have a culture of hospitalityand we're inviting you in.
But yeah, it just that's a wordthat can be a little confusing.
Speaker 2 (05:54):
Yes, and we'll tell you guys a little bit more about
ourselves.
So I am a Romani gypsy from theMachuaya subgroup and I had an
arranged marriage when I was 14.
I don't know, I'm sorry.
I was engaged at 14.
I was married at 17, and Ididn't really go to school.
(06:14):
Also, the only job I was reallyallowed to do was
fortune-telling, and so that'sjust kind of what I continue to
do.
I actually left my closedcommunity and I opened a
holistic wellness business, andwe also do the Romani podcast,
where we lift the voices ofRomani people from around the
(06:35):
world and other allies andobviously our book.
Speaker 1 (06:39):
So, yeah, yeah, and you might have found Paulina
through the podcast by the LATimes Foretold which tells your
whole story of, you know,leaving your arranged marriage
and fighting for custody and allof that.
So if you haven't heard that,you must Forgot about that.
Yeah, we fill in each other'sbios a lot.
It's hard to talk aboutyourself.
So I grew up in New Hampshire.
(07:01):
I mixed and assimilated.
I grew up in New Hampshire.
I am mixed and assimilated.
My grandmother comes from aSinti family, which is just
another subgroup of Romanipeople, and she grew up in Nazi
Germany, hiding her ethnicity inplain sight, which was very
complicated, and so when shecame to the US she really was
not planning on sharing herculture.
(07:23):
She didn't really share thatmuch with my mom and her
siblings until they were grown.
But when I was born she wasreally afraid that her cultural
connection, her knowledge youknow everything she carried with
her from the trades to you know, spiritual practices and
everything else would be lost.
And so my grandmother startedteaching me and everything else
would be lost.
And so my grandmother startedteaching me fortune telling as a
(07:46):
trade when I was about fouryears old, and so I was raised
the way that maybe my mother andher siblings would have been
had there not been such pressureto assimilate, especially after
the war.
And now I am a writer.
I read tarot, palm and tealeaves for clients individually.
(08:08):
I also love to do a party.
I love to be at a gala, Iperform a lot with Poetry
Brothel Boston and I do somespoken word, and I love to teach
divination workshops, holdrituals online and in person,
and I do a lot of creativecoaching as well.
(08:28):
So we are so excited to bringyou our beautiful cast tonight
and we are also doing a lot ofperformances all throughout the
weekend, and so keep an eye onwhat we're up to.
But our performers tonight comefrom a variety of backgrounds
and experiences and, becausethis is still a live podcast
(08:49):
recording, we're going to dowhat we do best.
We're going to interview, atiny little interview with each
performer about theirfascinating bios, and then we
will send them off into theiracts, and we are also going to
have a little burlesque, alittle drag, and so you know
consent is key.
You are welcome to tell theperformers how much you love
them by applauding and tippingthem generously, but no touching
(09:13):
, and if the performer comesaround to you and goes to touch
you.
You're welcome to say no thankyou, or you can just enjoy the
moment, but please hands toyourself.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
But you can touch their hearts with your cash.
Yes, you can just enjoy themoment, but please hands to
yourself.
Speaker 1 (09:27):
But you can touch their hearts with your cash.
Yes, you can.
We have a tip bucket rightthere that goes right to our
hearts.
And so, let's see, we wanted tointroduce our first person
who's been performing this wholetime for us.
This is Victor, our editor andmusical producer for Romanesan
Podcast.
He is our token gajo fortonight and he specializes in
(09:52):
flamenco fusion guitar,injecting flamenco musicality
and techniques into hisperformance.
Victor is also asinger-songwriter and performs
in the New England area.
Performs in the New Englandarea.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Thank you, victor.
So I think we're going to havea great show, and I also want to
introduce one of our performersand our show producer for the
night, bimbo Yaga for the night.
Bimbo Yaga.
Bimbo Yaga is the trans MILF ofyour wet dreams.
(10:32):
Here to haunt your nightmareswith sensual spells of emotional
domination.
Bimbo Yaga.
Speaker 4 (10:41):
Are you going to?
Speaker 2 (10:41):
cast a spell on us tonight.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
I certainly am gonna cast a spell on us tonight.
I certainly am going to cast aspell on you tonight, more of a
cord-cutting ritual, okay.
Speaker 4 (10:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
So yeah, Can you cut the cord?
Okay, oh, okay.
So one thing that we heardheard was we heard something
like an exorcism.
Like, did you used to dabble insomething like that?
Speaker 3 (11:10):
So yeah, cord cuttings are like a mini
exorcism for your soul, for yourheart.
But it's true, I was a teenageexorcist.
I learned the art and trade ofexorcism both from my family and
also I was apprenticed to aChristian mystic who did
hands-on healing in thespiritualist traditions when I
(11:33):
was 15.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
Can you tell us details, please?
Speaker 3 (11:38):
Do you want to hear about my exploits and how I
stumbled into being a teenageexorcist?
Yes, yes, how I stumbled intobeing a teenage exorcist?
Yes, yes, well, I was studyingmusic with a woman whose name is
Liz McDevitt and my mother wasa good friend of hers and she
(11:58):
had a friend whose name wasJackie McCloskey.
She became my teacher.
I got a reading from JackieMcCloskey.
We traded readings.
So I was 15 years old and she'dnever met a gypsy before and I
had never met a gajo woman whohad done tarot card readings
before.
So I was like this is veryinteresting.
So we traded readings for fourhours and at the end of that
(12:21):
four hours I said, oh, I want tolearn more about what you do.
And she says, okay, cool, well,I'll take you out for chicken
wings.
My favorite meal is chickenwings.
And so she was like we'll gofor chicken wings and then, yeah
, we'll talk about you know whatI do, what you do.
So we get in the car and we'redriving to chicken wings and I
(12:45):
see the chicken wing place justdriving by and just you know,
we're passing the chicken wingplace and I said, oh, jackie, um
, there goes the chicken wings.
And she said, oh, no, I have tostop at a client's house first
before we get chicken wings.
And I said, oh, what kind ofclient?
And she, oh, just somebodywho's going through a hard time.
(13:05):
And I said, oh, that's so nice,this lady is nice, a very
generous spirit.
So we go to her client's housewhen I lived in Okeechobee,
florida.
If you're familiar with Florida, okeechobee, florida, is a very
po-dunky town in the middle ofnowhere, swamp.
So we went to the middle ofnowhere of the middle of nowhere
(13:27):
in Florida.
We're driving.
All of a sudden thestreetlights are gone, all of a
sudden the road is gone andwe're driving into somebody's
swamp home.
We get there, we pull up andI'm like, wow, this person, I
loved it.
I grew up in a swampy ruralarea too.
So I was like this is wild,wild.
So we get in there and sheopens the door.
She's like now, whatever you do, don't panic.
(13:48):
And I said what?
So we go in and I had never meta fully ascendantly possessed
person before.
This person was deeply taken bysomething.
Their face was contorted, theywere sweating, they were
(14:10):
spitting.
And Jackie said, oh, I haveyour medicine.
And the person was like fuckyou, basically, and I don't want
no medicine.
And I said, jackie, what's themedicine?
And she says, oh, you, you haveto figure out how to get this
thing out of this person.
So I performed an exorcismthrough laying of hands and with
(14:36):
the assistance of my teacher,jackie, and, long story short,
it was successful.
Yay.
So we leave the house.
I was not feeling very well andI said, jackie, I don't feel
very well.
And she said oh, don't worry,it'll be fine, Just give it a
(14:57):
mile or two.
So we drive a mile or two awayfrom the house and I said,
jackie, you have to pull over.
And she said oh, good girl.
So she pulls over, I open thedoor, I stumble out, I throw up.
This is a very gross story, bythe way, I love it.
Ok, I throw up all over theswamp and the side of the car
(15:17):
and I'm crying.
I can't even put to words howabsolutely magical it was,
though, because there'sfireflies and there's the
cicadas and there's all thefrogs in the swamp and there's
me hurling this spirit out of mybody and I was exercising.
(15:37):
And she picks me up and she'slike now, next time, don't suck,
it, don't swallow.
And I said, said, excuse me.
And so we get back in the carand she's like how about those
chicken wings?
So we went for chicken wings,and that's how I started my
apprenticeship as an exorcistwhen I was 15 years old.
(15:59):
But don't worry, tonight Iwon't be sucking or swallowing.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Only cutting, only cutting.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
All right, so Let me move over to this other
microphone.
Have you ever been in love?
Hmm, yeah, is anybody currentlyin love?
It's spring.
(16:39):
It's spring and love is in theair.
But in order for love to enteryour heart, sometimes you have
to make a little room for it.
Right, it's a little bit ofroom, so what?
we're gonna do tonight, if youconsent, is I'm going to lead us
(17:01):
through a cord-cutting spellFor anybody who has lingering
threads of energetic longing orregret or rage between them and
the heart of a former lover or aformer place that you lived, or
(17:22):
a part of your history, anaspect of your history that
you're struggling to move onfrom.
We're going to lovingly wrap itup, tie it up, and we're going
to pull it out of our heart sothat we can make some room for
the new things coming.
Does that sound nice?
Yeah, a little emotional springcleaning, right?
(17:45):
Y'all want to do something likethat?
Okay, well, I need a volunteer,and you're all are so far away.
I need one volunteer to yeah,yeah, so, jim buckle up, jim.
(18:07):
What I need you to do is grabthis and slowly take this around
to every person and everybody.
Just hold on to this thread.
Does that make sense?
Just weave it through?
No down.
Just the audience for now.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know Imisinstructed you.
(18:28):
You got it.
You got it and then pass itaround.
So grab a little bit there yougo and then pass it around.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, okay.
While that's happening, I needeverybody to think about the
chords that they need cut, okay.
Okay to think about the chordsthat they need cut.
(18:50):
Okay, and I am going to read avery ancient, powerful gypsy
spell of chord cutting that Ihave right here in my little
book of gay poetry that I wrotewhen I was 20.
Speaker 4 (19:11):
Yes, you can applause for that.
Speaker 3 (19:14):
Has anybody written bad gay love poems or straight
love poems?
Anybody wrote bad love poems.
Raise your hands, okay.
So what I want you to do is, asI pour my heart out to you, I
want you to think about all thebad love poems you've ever
written.
And this is a breakup poem.
It was a very bad relationshipand a horrible breakup.
(19:37):
So while you're thinking about,these chords you need to cut,
I'm gonna cast this, spell youready.
Everybody got the thread.
Lilies of my learning, the sunin its blue and golden
(19:57):
generosity wasn't enough.
I still remember your cold,pushing back my lips, forcing my
teeth against my betterjudgment, even the crows, two by
three, dancing through the iceof your stair.
(20:18):
Well, they still sang caw, caw,caw.
My tongue lilted and theirwords were mine for a time, a
cacophony of you're so beautiful.
I forgot the sourness of yourfingers against my lips and the
(20:40):
paper cut kiss at the airport.
That meant goodbye.
Your baggage on the curb burnt,with my silence.
I was a little unhinged backthen.
A truth I boxed silent thatmaybe I was wrong to promise you
(21:02):
forever.
But what would you have saidhad you known that while you
packed your bags last night, ourlast night I busily tilled
under our garden that roses nolonger grow for you here, just
(21:27):
the lilies of my learning.
Applause, applause.
Now applaud you in thosemoments of writing terrible
breakup poetry.
I'm so proud of you.
Better out than in, better outthan in.
(21:47):
So I want you to think aboutthe cords you have to cut and
just grab your thread on eitherside, just wrap your hands
around and when you're readyjust break
it.
Just break it and have twoseparate pieces, or three or
(22:09):
seven.
Some of you have been sluts,little busy sluts.
I see you back there.
You have these two separatepieces of this thread.
Now, right, you can whipyourself, you can whip someone
with the other hand if you wouldlike, if they consent.
What I want you to do is I wantyou to gather up these threads
(22:39):
and just think that part of yourlife, think those relationships
, think yourself and thank Godyou've moved on.
Stick one in one pocket, excuseme, and one in the other pocket
.
And when you leave here tonighton your walk home, whenever you
(23:02):
feel inspired, take one pieceout and give it to the tree,
give it to a shrub, and thenlater take another piece out and
give it to another tree,another shrub, another piece of
beautiful green.
And when you do give theinvitation to the spirits that
(23:23):
tend to those trees and say makea better home for this than my
heart was, will you promiseyou'll do?
Just because you've cut thecord doesn't mean that these
pieces don't deserve care andopportunities for future
(23:44):
possibility.
Right, just not at my table,thank you.
Speaker 1 (23:52):
Thank you, Bimbo.
Speaker 4 (23:54):
Yaga, give it up for Bimbo.
Speaker 1 (23:55):
Yaga, we are cleansed , we are cured.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
I do feel cured.
Speaker 3 (24:03):
That open space of all the love you can manage.
Speaker 1 (24:10):
Thank you.
Thank you Wonderful.
Next we have Millie Raccoon.
Where are you, millie?
Come on over, come on over.
Trained by campfires and tavernjams all over the world, millie
(24:37):
Raccoon got her folk musicstart with traditional Turkish,
egyptian and Roma tunes for abelly dance troupe honoring Roma
heritage on her father's side.
Her current original music isinfluenced by classic country,
early jazz and other antiquatedAmericana.
There is a connecting thread ofspirituality, healing and
liberation weaving through herwork.
Let's welcome Millie with around of applause.
(24:59):
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Thank you so much for beinghere.
Speaker 7 (25:05):
So our question to you in what way do you feel that
music heals you?
I think the way it's healed mepersonally is it's given me a
purpose and a community and apath in what was otherwise a
(25:27):
kind of isolating, directionlesslife.
I was estranged from my familypretty young, and so having a
connection with music and thepeople I was able to connect to
through that filled up a lot ofthose holes and fed my soul when
(25:50):
I first realized what washappening.
And it also gives me a sense ofbeing able to help other people
in some way, whether it'sinspiring or uplifting or even
just being relatable throughsong, because you know, a lot of
songwriters process theirridiculous situations through
(26:12):
song and it creates somethingbigger than themselves that
other people can take from aswell.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
Thank you for sharing that.
Thank you so much.
Well, we can't wait to hear youperform yeah, whenever you're
ready.
Speaker 4 (26:41):
The way she cried, she lost her eyes.
Her lashes left her lids.
Speaker 8 (27:21):
Her prideful mind.
He could not find her lovinglips.
He did Her face.
(27:43):
She pressed into his chest,told him she must go.
It's in my mind to find a homeand a husband, for to know the
end is nigh and that is why I'mnot asking you to marry me.
(28:04):
The tides will turn and theearth will burn, and the wind
and sands will bury me.
She wandered for a hundredsongs Along the mountainside and
(28:28):
in the town she'd look aroundFor the ladies of the night.
She'd barter false affectionsfor food and feather bed.
She thought of her lost lover.
(28:55):
In the final words, he'd saidthe end is nigh and that is why
I'm not asking you to marry me.
The tides will turn, the earthwill burn and the wind and sands
(29:19):
will bury me.
She learned of flesh andpleasure her body.
Speaker 6 (29:29):
You could own.
Speaker 8 (29:44):
At night she sang so sweetly the other whores to hear
.
Speaker 4 (29:54):
They said go to the city lest fate imprison you here
she was given gifts aplenty bymen she did not know.
Speaker 8 (30:37):
But one who'd heard her singing gave her an old
banjo Soon she played forpayment, her freedom.
She had found Not whore norwife, but mighty bard.
(31:03):
She troubled the world around.
The end is nigh, and that iswhy I'm not asking you to marry
me.
The tides will turn, the earthwill burn and the wind and sands
(31:27):
will bury me.
She rose her song for forests,for trees, to give us bread, for
whales and fish in oceans thatgreed would put to death.
(31:50):
And when the earth was wholeagain, she'd find the love she
once knew and say I see theworld you saved, and now I'll
(32:11):
marry you.
Speaker 2 (32:20):
I'll marry you.
Speaker 1 (32:22):
Thank you, millie Raccoon, everybody Chill.
Thank you so much, Millie.
What is the name of that songand how can people find your
music?
Speaker 7 (32:30):
That song is called the Tides Will Turn.
I have physical copies of CDsat the merch table, but also my
name is Millie, with a Y raccoonwith two Cs, and I'm on all the
things on the internet Spotify,youtube, everything, whatever
(32:53):
they are.
Speaker 1 (32:54):
Wonderful.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (33:01):
Next we have Moonbear Agulad.
Welcome Moonbear.
Also known as Butylene O'Kipple, a gender expansive, two-spirit
artist and energy worker ofMexican indigenous North African
Romani and mixed oh sorry,north American Romani and mixed
(33:26):
European heritage.
Their 30-plus years as aperformer and musician continue
to be fueled by curiosity andself-discovery, while exploring
the intersections of ancestorveneration, energy work, dance,
mediumship and drag.
Speaker 1 (33:44):
So welcome Thanks for having me.
Speaker 2 (33:49):
We would like to know what is the relationship
between divinity and drag inyour work.
Speaker 5 (33:56):
Do I not look divine?
Speaker 1 (33:58):
You do indeed, wearing a lowly scarf which you
can purchase over at the merchtable, diclo.
Speaker 5 (34:05):
Collective.
In my experience, the two havebeen very clearly intertwined in
my life.
I think there's something aboutskirting masculinity while also
averting transmisogyny that hasallowed me access to
(34:29):
transesters and ancestors thatwere finally able to see me in
my fullness, and so my spiritteam greatly expanded once I
started expressing myselfdifferently and really just
putting myself out there toperform in this way, and it's
been a journey of self-discovery.
(34:51):
All my performance is rooted inmy own life experience, so it's
always like a little piece ofmyself that I'm giving to the
audience and also for me it'svery much blended with what I
call the medicine of the momentand what's going on in the ether
, what's going on in the greaterculture, and how can I
(35:12):
reference that in a way thatsubverts expectations and brings
joy somehow, or catharsis orwhatever it is, to my audience.
And so it's all been one big,juicy, sticky, lovely mess.
Speaker 1 (35:30):
That is so gorgeous.
I love that, and we can't waitto see what you get up to.
Speaker 2 (35:36):
I'm very excited personally.
Okay, and I believe you'reperforming an interpretive drag
ensemble set to the poem WhiteCaravan, written by Jasmina in
honor of their mother after herdeath.
Speaker 5 (35:55):
Yeah, no stress.
I cannot wait and I will cry.
I probably will too.
Speaker 2 (36:01):
Let's cry together, we're ready, we're ready, we're
about to listen to our very ownJez's poem, white Caravan, where
Moon Bear performs a dragtableau with music by Lady Baby
Miss.
Speaker 1 (36:21):
This was such a powerful performance.
So first, white Caravan is adeath fugue that I wrote after
my mother died and I wrote it inher voice.
Wrote it in her voice andMoonbearer did this incredible
performance where they seem likethey're coming home from work
(36:41):
after a long day and are veryslowly, slowly, undressing as
though in front of their vanityand are you know, braiding their
hair, their long dark hair, andjust acting out this very
emotional poem, and then at theend they cut their braids off
and I was just so moved I mean Ididn't start crying on stage,
(37:06):
but it was only by the grace ofGod.
I had never seen anyone performanything to anything I'd
written and it was just sopersonal.
And Moon Bear really didcapture my mother's energy, and
so I think she really would haveloved this.
Speaker 2 (37:23):
You guys can also check out some pictures of the
performance on our Instagram, atRomanistan Podcast.
Speaker 1 (37:30):
Yeah, also so, because we wanted to have a very
clear recording.
This recording that we'resharing with you is pre-recorded
of me reading the poem withLady Baby Miss's music, so
please enjoy.
White Caravan a death fugue inmy mother's voice.
(37:53):
A death fugue in my mother'svoice.
My white caravan clomps throughthe desert, color scorched
ecstatic.
The wagon burns because I'm hotshit.
(38:14):
My ancestors are diasporic,skull-polished, hard-knocking.
Speaker 2 (38:30):
I'll come to them around the fire, my red horse
waiting.
Speaker 1 (38:35):
I had nightmares of molars rolling over floorboards,
freed from their skeletonshelves, leaping like lentils in
a rattle German gypsy, ahandful of teeth I used to a
family legacy.
Every organ is hardening such arare disease.
Once my daughter spread mymother's playing cards across a
(39:12):
table, red and black, winkingwhat I already knew to cover the
mirrors very soon, mama do you?
have anything to ask the cards,yeah, what the fuck?
I never told fortunes like heror my mother, damn it.
(39:37):
I was an aerobics instructor,horse trainer, dog groomer.
I kept accounts.
I was a shop clerk leg salesgirl, bodybuilder, perfect score
GED when I was 30.
I could have kept going.
Something stopped me.
(40:12):
My skin thickened over my littlewagonavan door, blessed above
with a horseshoe and bells, Iinvite the soot of evening to
cover, throw pillows and scartissue to smother me good like a
measured father Develep, like ameasured father devla, my white
(40:40):
father peddled me while mygypsy mother froze like a fawn
in the light of a new country, anew language, she leaned into
horror, weaned on the Naziregime, fresh off the boat into
the arms of her own privatetyrant.
Horse-drawn teacups, shudder,all porcelain and wet leaves
(41:10):
clattering down my calcifiedlungs as I breathe and breathe.
I used to stand on my redhorse's back as she galloped,
our hair braided.
Now watch the pinchers of thescorpion weave getting closer to
(41:37):
me.
That's the boxer I would bet on.
And who can forget the sting?
I'm looking for death.
The beautiful woman who willstop my wagon and take me where
the dunes open to reveal acompressed gem of endings where
sand closes over my head.
(41:57):
As I look up at the night'sbody, the moon is a tendon-rod
joint for me to scream at.
Once I loved her and only spokesoft words Lachy, lachachi.
Goddess of the good, I'mentitled to my anger and my
(42:23):
angels.
When scorpions crack from theirbacks, rise between my busted
spokes, they are, for three days, delicate.
I have always been so delicateand no one has treated me that
(42:48):
way.
I am transforming, spitting upthe black shell.
I am playing with my medication.
I am bored of this business ofsickening.
My mother says I was born withone foot on the other side
(43:10):
because I could see spirits andpredict the deaths of everyone I
met.
I've been saying I'd like tojump in with both feet.
I'll go out with sirens blaring, flooding the desert inside me,
blue and red, my daughter andmy husband frantic, breathing me
(43:36):
with their hands.
I'll go out on a new moon inaugust when the prayer fire
burns outside, just after mydaughter asks for my healing at
the edge of the woods.
Beliefs have never healed meand if I were to be buried, I
(43:57):
would be buried standing.
Instead, I will burn withungodly clacking.
When I am decanted, I will beash blown back into my
daughter's hair as she prays meinto her meadow grass and ocean
(44:17):
water, with whiskey and flowers,mixed in with the old ash of my
red horse, her breath blowinghot, carrying me off, and I will
be her ancestor working an oldtrade, a good job.
I feel better guiding her fromhere.
Thank you so much.
(44:53):
You know, my mother reallyloved two things, and that was
drag and attention, and I justcan't imagine a better way to
pay tribute.
Thank you so much.
Thank you, moon Bear.
We are going to take a littleintermission.
(45:13):
Please feel free to refreshyour drink and we will be back
in just a few minutes.
We can do it before the play.
Yeah, yeah, awesome, thanks.
So we're playing it right here.
Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 3 (45:28):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.
Speaker 4 (45:34):
Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah .
Speaker 3 (45:43):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1 (45:57):
Welcome back to Romanistan.
Speaker 2 (46:02):
We're your friendly neighborhood gypsies, actually.
We're your friendlyneighborhood gypsies actually,
millie Raccoon.
So if you can make your way, wehave another question for you,
(46:30):
though.
Yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, okay.
So you've played everywhere,from taverns to belly dance
stages.
What's the wildest or mostunexpected place your music has
taken you?
Speaker 7 (46:51):
So I can kind of turn this question inside out or my
answer, because I think it'skind of ordinary for me to play
in wild places and I've playedall kinds of really wild places
all over the world and someplaces where people think I'm a
little strange and surprising,and so I would say the place
(47:16):
that I least fit in, that I everplayed was at this country
music festival in rural Nebraskafor farmers.
And the connection of why I wasthere in the first place is
because I play country music andso I was like that'll be cool.
(47:38):
But I was about to do this songfor them called the Saturn
Return of the Country Witchesand it's about farmers who are
witches and I wasn't thinkingthat hard about it.
They're kind of very likeconservative Christian people
and all I said was, oh, I'mgonna do this song about these
(48:01):
two farmers that I know and it'sreally neat to be playing for
this festival of all farmersbecause I'm from the city and I
don't really know that manyfarmers and it was just like
completely silent and they justlike did not like me once I said
that it was very clear that Iwas.
(48:22):
They weren't my target audiencenecessarily.
Speaker 2 (48:25):
But I still did the song that does sound pretty wild
, so so.
You can perform.
Speaker 1 (48:34):
Amazing segue, Paulina, but that does sound
pretty pretty wild.
Oh my gosh.
Yeah, it's tough when you'rewith a tough audience.
I bet you nailed it, though.
Speaker 8 (48:44):
Thank, you Addicted to the sadness I feed it till it
(49:51):
grows Larger than my destiny.
A fork in every road, a fork inevery road.
I'm a slave to my freedom.
Every road, a fork in everyroad I'm a slave to my freedom
can never be tied down.
I run around in circles, awayfrom where I'm bound, away from
(50:13):
where I'm bound, my mother andmy sister's about to die of
thirst.
To be a better human, or try tosave the earth.
Try to save the earth.
I'm a wolf in sheep's clothing.
(50:34):
Everywhere I go, they put me inthe madhouse if they knew what
I know, knew what I know Thank,you Got all these superpowers.
(51:37):
Only myself to save.
I rescue all the villains toprove that I am brave.
To prove that I am brave, Ichoose the meanest teachers, the
fastest way to learn.
The body of a mother, wisdom ofa crow, wisdom of a crow.
(52:00):
They pretend they don't knowbetter, like they don't know the
rules.
I'm building a secret lair Deepbelow their souls, deep below
their souls.
I'm waiting in the darkness,praying the sun won't rise.
(52:22):
One day I'll rise up, singing.
I'm taking root to fly, takingroot to fly, thank you.
Speaker 1 (53:35):
Amazing Millie.
Thank you so much.
Ten out of ten Ten out of ten.
You can, of course, tip ourperformers Welcome back from our
intermission.
Thank you so much for everyonecoming back.
We are so excited to bring MoonBear back to the stage.
Woo, woo, woo.
Applause for Moon Bear.
Welcome back.
(53:55):
Woo, woo, woo, woo.
And we are so excited to askyou another question, because
this is still a Romanistanpodcast, even though we have a
much more exciting format.
We'll have to do this again.
Speaker 5 (54:11):
So much to talk about .
Speaker 1 (54:13):
So much to talk about .
So we would like to know, inall of your years of walking
between worlds as a medium, whatis the most dramatic or bizarre
way a spirit has revealeditself to you?
Speaker 5 (54:30):
Oh, that's a fun one, I would say.
I think it was in my third yearactually studying with Bimbo
Yaga, who's also my witch mom wethis was, I think, maybe 2000.
So, like stuff had already shutdown and we weren't doing like
(54:53):
in person visits, you know.
But that was like that wouldhave been the time that we would
have started doing like, thetime that we would have started
doing like you know, in-personvisits, and um, we did so.
So we were doing remote visits,um, for a, an apartment
building on Capitol Hill inSeattle which I'm familiar with.
I had done work in the buildingbefore um, and so for many
(55:15):
reasons I was insecure.
You know about like a doinglike a distance, uh, reading
like that, you know, or it'slike halfway across the city, uh
, and you're like, well, is thisgonna work?
you know, um, and impostersyndrome and what have you of
course, of course relatable andso, um, we were assigned little
teams in our circle and I wasassigned, uh, the basement to
(55:38):
investigate and just see whatcomes up, you know.
And so we're doing our journeys.
You know, we're like we eachkind of like splintered off and
we were investigating in our ownways and I was like mm-hmm, and
Beyonce started like playing inmy head.
I was like, I was like, oh my,my gosh, I'm totally doing this
(56:01):
wrong.
You know, I'm completelydistracted.
I just want to, you know,listen to beyonce, apparently,
and and and, but.
But then we come back and, uh,you know, everybody's giving
their like amazing insights andyou know, uh, it was like oh
yeah, this lines up with whatthe client said, and blah, blah,
blah.
And then I, finally, I was justlike, okay, so spirit was
(56:23):
singing Beyonce.
It was like, and specificallyto the left, to the left,
everything you own in a box tothe left.
And um, oh right, and we wereon a video call with the client
you know the manager of thisbuilding and her face just kind
of dropped and and and she waslike, uh, to the left of the
(56:44):
basement there had been a tenantthat passed away in his
apartment above that and no onefound him.
So he disintegrated and thefloor came through and all of
his stuff had still been fallenthrough the floor, just to the
left of the entrance of the tothe basement, and it was an old
(57:09):
bag so he was literally like uh,could you get my stuff out of
the basement?
finally, and I would love tomove on, so and he told you
through songs.
Speaker 1 (57:21):
Yeah, through.
Speaker 5 (57:22):
Beyonce songs through what a character yeah, yeah
that's incredible and alsohorrifying and upsetting, and
like oh, truly, truly.
Speaker 1 (57:33):
But I love the sense of humor honestly right, yeah, I
know, yeah and know.
Speaker 5 (57:38):
If who can't gaslight you but a spirit, yeah, wow.
Speaker 1 (57:44):
That was incredible.
Thank you so much for sharingthat.
So, you are about to do anotherperformance for us.
I think that is so nice of you.
Speaker 5 (57:51):
So this is like, uh, this is like the breath of like
kind of what I do as a dragqueen, Like I take what I do
seriously but not myselfseriously in any kind of way.
Speaker 1 (58:01):
You can't take yourself too seriously, right?
Speaker 5 (58:03):
I always fuck it up when I do and uh, and so
sometimes, like wheneverpossible, I'll do something like
really deep and gut-wrenching,you know, such as like uh,
beautiful poetry written about avery intimate time an ode to my
dead mom in front of me.
Speaker 1 (58:18):
Yeah, amazing.
Speaker 5 (58:20):
And sometimes what we all need is just a gay anthem,
just like that song in the clubthat you know all the words to
and you just need to scream itin your underwear with your
friends or whatever.
So this is a little example ofthe latter.
It's not too serious, it's justkind of silly, but if you know
(58:42):
the words you should sing alongwe can't wait moon bear gave an
amazing performance, lip singingto robin's, dancing on my own
in a slightly ruined prom dress.
Speaker 2 (58:55):
Unfortunately, we can't play the whole song due to
copyright issues, but you canjust imagine how the rest goes.
Speaker 1 (59:02):
Thank you.
Oh, my god, give it up for MoonBear.
Oh, amazing.
Well, we have a very specialact for you, who we are not
going to introduce because shedoes not need an introduction
introduce, because she does notneed an introduction.
(59:25):
Next we have Serena Hellfire,the Mae West of the French
Quarter, and she gave anincredible burlesque performance
in a red and black ensemble,dripping in jewels, wearing a
crown very vampire-esque energy,and she was just incredible.
Unfortunately, we cannot shareall the magical things she did
(59:50):
with fans and her gestures andglances, but she does give such
a fun interview and you'll justhave to catch her in New Orleans
yourself, or really?
She travels all over the world,so you could probably find her
anywhere.
You just have to time it in NewOrleans yourself, or really?
She travels all over the world,so you could probably find her
anywhere.
You just have to time it rightwith the gods.
Oh, my goodness, thank you somuch for being here.
(01:00:25):
Fuck that wig.
Fuck that wig.
Speaker 2 (01:00:35):
Everyone just witnessed the May West of the
French Quarter.
Witness the Mae West of theFrench Quarter.
Serena Magdalena Hellfire hasbeen on behind and in front of
the stage professionally since2002.
She is a queer, sinti, gitano,kale, roma, gypsy witch and
(01:00:59):
performance artist.
She less vampire cabaret, swingnight at always lounge cabaret
and many other productions inthe beautiful city of new
orleans.
She is also one of the maincrew members of the
international endless nightfestival, baby, the inner
vampire court since 2011,.
(01:01:21):
And Madam Hellfire has sungwith the slick, skillet
serenaders.
So, serena, your name aloneconjures fire and death
priestess lineage.
How do you channel yourwitchcraft and vampiric energy
(01:01:42):
into your performances and areyou casting spells on us right
now on stage?
Speaker 6 (01:01:48):
Well, I mean, the wig did come off and I always roll
around with a head covering.
So probably, yes, maybe ofcourse.
I'm so excited to see both ofyou and be in this beautiful
space with all of you sexywitches.
Yeah, oh, my God, goodness,where to begin?
(01:02:12):
Let's see, I started reallysinging and dancing when I was
this big.
Sorry, this big Fans are in theway.
How I channel everything?
I have a very regimentedmorning ritual.
(01:02:33):
I do cards with the cats andElva knows it's like, hey, guess
what I'm doing.
And the cats actually sit onthe cards that I'm supposed to
pay attention to.
I have four altars.
I do a lot of death and ancestorwork.
That is my lineage here in NewOrleans.
(01:02:56):
It's kind of we're a portalanyway, so it's we're either
partying or celebratingsomeone's death or just having a
good time.
So it's just been kind ofnatural for me and my family.
That's what we have always done.
How do I channel it?
Like this, we do all kinds oflike creating this festival.
(01:03:18):
Like creating this festival.
We have, like I personally do,so many shows where I talk about
death or I'm always some kindof intermissary.
Being from the realms, I'm adevotee of Hakate and Lilith and
Sarakali, and that's.
I feel like that's just what wedo, especially in these times.
Like so how I channel all thefire and rage and that stuff.
(01:03:45):
It's hard.
It's hard being a Romani queerwitch and not one to blow things
up, is that allowed?
But also these two over herewe've been doing some really fun
things called, you know, queerwitch cabaret, and we've been
really just kind of embodyinglike the four, you know the
(01:04:08):
quarterly, like four seasons,and just kind of recreating
those old myths, because theworld has forgotten and they
need to remember.
Get this microwave for me, orI'm just going to take over the
show.
I'm so excited to finally seeyour faces.
I know, it's like I just tookmy wig off.
(01:04:29):
my titties are out it's like Ijust kind of wanted to do some
floor work, but I know if I getdown on the floor she's not
coming up oh gosh, we have onemore question for you.
Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
What role does glamour magic play in your work
on the stage, your time off thestage?
Speaker 6 (01:04:53):
I'm kind of good at that.
I don't know if you've noticed,I really do like blurring the
lines between reality andfantasy and I've been doing that
since I was a kid.
I am heavily versed in therealm of the theater and it
(01:05:13):
really kind of anytime.
So the reason why I'm reallykind of weird about like get
ready at the venue and I'm likeI cannot because I literally
have a whole space in my housewhere I literally channel that
character and I channeled it myancestor, altar, is literally
right next to my boudoir andMagdalena helps me put on this
(01:05:35):
face.
So that's, that is how I dothis.
It's all glamour.
It's all glamour and hellfire.
Is that a show?
Tops are talking right, glamourand hellfire.
Speaker 1 (01:05:50):
Oh my gosh, thank you so much for sharing your magic
and your gifts with us.
We're so happy to see you.
No, it needed to Everyone.
Please a round of applause forthe infamous Zarina Hellfire.
Thank you.
Paulina and I are going to becrossing the lines from hosts to
(01:06:25):
performers for just a brief,brief, little interlude.
I hope you will indulge us.
Paulina will be beginning withtwo short poems.
Speaker 2 (01:06:36):
I've actually never read poetry out loud.
Speaker 1 (01:06:39):
Let's do a little round of applause for Paulina,
because we've gotta celebrateyour first time.
Speaker 2 (01:06:49):
So the first one is for anyone who's ever smoked a
blunt the warm, thick, brownbetween my fingertips, ashes
falling on my hips, fire burningon my lips at the tip,
(01:07:10):
overstuffed just enough.
Not my lover or my friend, I'llstill crave you till the end.
One more short one, okay.
He said I miss the old you.
(01:07:31):
I said I thought I told you Oldme was the broke me, old me was
lonely, old me was below me,old me don't even know me, but
old me still got a hold on me.
Speaker 1 (01:07:52):
New me said screw me.
Even new me outgrew me.
Thank you so much, paulina.
What a wonderful experience, ohmy goodness.
Speaker 2 (01:08:03):
So now Paulina is going to introduce me, because
I'm going to read some poems too.
Everyone give a round ofapplause for Jess Jasmina
Bontila.
Hello.
Speaker 1 (01:08:19):
I am gathering my poems.
Can you hear me, okay?
Amazing.
So my first poem is called theHermit and it is inspired by the
tarot card.
(01:08:40):
Babe, I'm in the woods.
You keep calling them yourwoods, your woods, and the
fond-nose.
Possession is not affection.
Let me hold up my lantern toyour bullshit.
I've been living in the margins, illuminating a manuscript of
human folly and hope, of dragonschasing rabbits and rabbits
(01:09:02):
wielding hatchets.
My whimsy is not for humanconsumption.
I think I'm human by mistake.
I think I'm gender by default.
I think I've been erased.
I keep seeing fascists when Ileave the woods.
Keep seeing why my grandmothertold me to never tell anyone
(01:09:25):
we're gypsies and I toldeveryone we're gypsies.
When so much of your family diesand so much of your country is
just killing you, you might begrateful that your survivors
have not survived to see this.
You might live among the deerand step out on humankind.
(01:09:50):
Hold my lantern while I'mreclaimed by pines.
Let me draw you thigh deep intothe wetlands with the promise
of light.
Let me turn into a crane andbreak a rapist's arms.
Let me enact forest law.
I want to be left alone.
(01:10:14):
My body is moss and mushroomsthe only system I want to be a
part of.
Let me use my staff fordefensive magic or studying my
gait.
The woods age you, but in atimeless way.
Silver birch bark curling uplike snakes.
(01:10:38):
Society ravages you.
Gray hair doubled by a winterof billionaires throwing Nazi
salutes on autoplay.
A crow ate my phone and I amhere to lead you to madness.
Because you should not followme.
Follow the weird, earnestlantern glowing in your chest
(01:11:02):
into the woods, intoxicatinglydark, lit by bleeding heart
flower stalks.
Thank you so much.
My next poem is called LadyMacbeth.
Through my Gender Reveal Partyshe did.
(01:11:25):
When I was 12, my English classread Macbeth aloud from our
seats, rotating the parts untilthe lines sounded never smooth,
but not quite as bad as thefirst time we stumbled through.
Soon I got to play Lady Macbeth.
(01:11:46):
I had already read it and Iknew what I was in for.
I trembled like I was fallingin love.
I loved this terrible woman.
It's not unusual for the babyqueers to love a villain or for
the multi-ethnic kids toidentify with the outcast.
It was also that my motherconvinced me for weeks before
(01:12:11):
the play that the world wasgoing to end.
She made me recite all myregrets in the bathtub the night
.
It was to happen that I havenever been kissed, never been in
love, and all my sins againsther.
I stayed awake till sunrise,curled on the carpet beside her
(01:12:31):
bed, waiting for the comet toobliterate us and let heaven eat
my shame.
In the morning my mother wasunrepentant and acted as though
nothing had happened, and Isuppose in a way it hadn't.
Years later, when I was 19, mymother would fill the house with
gas and very casually try tokill us, and no one was
(01:12:55):
surprised.
We didn't even call the police,we just put her back to bed.
I was taught to love terribleand complicated women early.
But it wasn't even that.
It was actually the line whenLady Macbeth strode into the
forest because her husband wassuch a fucking pussy and she
yelled unsex me here to the darkspirits of the wood so they
(01:13:20):
could take her womaness and freeher to do what she must in an
English class at 1 30 pm, afterwe were all too sleepy from
chicken nuggets at lunch, Istood up when it was time, when
no one asked me to, and screamedUNSEX.
Speaker 8 (01:13:41):
ME HERE.
Speaker 1 (01:13:48):
It wasn't just that I was navigating abuse or that I
thought taking my girl skin offmight save me from my cousins
the cannibals, it wasn't that.
Unsex ME HERE.
I wanted to say it over andover again like a chant, so
happy the trees had lifted LadyMacbeth's femininity from her
(01:14:09):
shoulders like a cloak thatdragged dead leaves behind her
so she could go and do hermurder.
I didn't want to murder, but Iwanted the forest to take me so
I could be the forest, formlessand powerful, an agent of
multiplicity, freedom and chaos.
(01:14:30):
Un-sex-me-here.
Lady Macbeth threw me thatgender reveal party before I
even knew what it was.
That gender reveal party beforeI even knew what it was.
My English teacher let me keepreading that part a couple of
more times until everyone in theseventh grade knew I was going
through something.
(01:14:51):
Thank you so much, everyone,for being here.
Give yourselves a round ofapplause for coming out to
(01:15:12):
support a really weird gypsyqueer trans podcast and variety
show from people you've neverheard of, who aren't in any way
famous, and yet we keep writingbooks and making weird stuff and
selling it in corners of bars.
Give yourself a hand for beingjust as weird and awesome as
(01:15:33):
everything out here.
Speaker 2 (01:15:35):
And if you all look under your chairs, you will find
we cast a dispel on you.
No, just kidding, you're cursed.
Speaker 1 (01:15:42):
Welcome to the family .
Thank you so much.
Thank you, thank you and thankyou so much to our incredible
cast.
Please support them, find themonline, tip them, buy their
stuff, go to their shows andthank you to Victor for scoring
the whole thing.
He's gonna edit this later.
(01:16:05):
It's going to be, great.
Thank you, victor.
Good night everyone.
Thank you so much for sharingour first live show with us.
(01:16:36):
We are so grateful to our cast,to bimbo yaga for producing.
I mean, every performer wasjust so incredible and also
thank you to everyone who cameout.
Some a really lovely coupleflew in all the way from ohio
and we were just so moved andexcited.
So thank you so much extra.
Speaker 2 (01:16:55):
Thank you guys yeah, we are totally like stunned and
so happy and and we appreciateyou guys as much as we can Like.
We have maximum appreciation.
We are mad.
Speaker 1 (01:17:09):
We love you so much, you, the max.
Yeah, it was such a blast, whata wonderful time, and we hope
to do it again someday.
Speaker 2 (01:17:18):
Yeah, and we hope you guys liked the show and we love
you to our listeners we do.
We love you very much.
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