May 2, 2025 • 33 mins
Have you ever stood in front of the mirror and couldn’t face what was looking back?
In this raw and real episode of Rooted & Recovered, Dan and Justin dive into Step Four of the 12-Step Program: “Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.” This is the step that many people want to skip—but it’s also where true healing begins.
Together, they confront the painful but powerful truth: freedom is often hiding behind the very thing you refuse to face. From their own stories of brokenness to the woman at the well in John 4, they show how Jesus doesn’t turn away from our mess—He meets us there and invites us into healing.
What You’ll Hear:
- Denial, defensiveness, and distraction will keep you stuck
- Lamentations 3:40 calls us to examine our ways and return to the Lord
- True healing begins with bold honesty: Psalm 139:23–24
- You are not guilty of what others did to you—but you can surrender the pain
- Jesus knows every secret—and still stays
Key Scriptures:
Lamentations 3:40, Psalm 139:23–24, John 4 (Woman at the Well), Revelation 3:20,
Final Key Thought:
God can’t heal the version of you that you're pretending to be. He heals the one you're willing to bring to Him.
Your scars don’t scare Jesus—they invite Him in.
If this episode speaks to you, please share it. Someone you know is carrying what they were never meant to carry, and this might be the truth that sets them free.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:00):
This world doesn't hand outhealing.
It offers quick fixes, cheaphighes and empty promises, but
real recovery.
It takes roots.
Roots that dig deep into truth,into identity, into the
unshakeable grace of God.
We're not here to sugarcoat thestruggle.
(00:22):
We've lived it.
Addiction, shame, relapse,regret, but we've also seen
resurrection.
We've seen what happened.
Happens when broken people getanchored in something real
rooted and recovered is morethan a podcast.
It's a battleground for thesoul.
A place where scars tellstories, where scripture speaks
(00:43):
louder than shame, where freedomisn't just a word.
It's a war we win daily.
So if you're tired of surfacelevel answers, if you want truth
that convicts, hope that heals,and conversations that cut
through the noise, you're in theright place.
Welcome to Rooted and Recovered.
Justin (01:06):
Welcome everybody to another episode of Rooted and
Recovered.
I'm Justin Miller, along withDan Pyles.
today.
I got a question.
Have you ever stood in front ofthe mirror and you just didn't
wanna look?
You ever just stood there andthought, man, I can't look in
the mirror.
I can't face what's on.
I can't face what's in thatmirror?
(01:30):
Guys, a lot of us find ourselvesthere in our recovery.
A lot of us find ourselves therein our life, and if we're being
honest, there's times when I dothat, there's times I guarantee
when Dan does that.
But guys, there's a truth.
That we need to realize youcan't heal what you won't face.
(01:55):
Step four tells us, madesearching, and fearless moral
inventory of ourselves.
That means looking at ourselvesreal, raw, and honest, and
asking the question, what am Itoo afraid to admit even to
(02:16):
myself?
Dan (02:18):
this step right here, step four, I'm gonna let you know
right now.
It's tough.
This is a tough step, butJustin, this step right here,
step four is where healingreally starts because step four
tells you that in me that wemade a searching and fearless
(02:43):
moral inventory of our selves.
When you talked about thatmirror moment, I had a mirror
moment.
Eight years ago, I seen myselfin the mirror after a 14 year
addiction.
Justin, I had that mirror momentwhen I seen what I thought I had
(03:07):
control of what I thought.
I was.
I was in charge.
I wasn't addicted, I wasn'tstruggling.
I wasn't this, then I seenmyself in the mirror and there's
a, there, the, the reality is,the truth is just in that you
(03:32):
and I can't heal what we won'tface.
I believe for myself a hundredpercent.
And maybe you can too, maybeJustin, maybe you can testify to
this and maybe the listener, thelistener can testify to this,
that you can't heal what youwon't face.
It wasn't until I probably sawmyself in the mirror hundreds of
(03:53):
times, but it wasn't until thatrock bottom moment that I
finally saw, like really sawmyself in the mirror and I was
like, oh boy.
This is a little bit different.
The, the question that I had,and you brought up a great
(04:13):
question, Justin.
The, the question that I've gotfor myself and for you Justin,
and even for the listener, iswhat if the freedom.
And that's what we sodesperately need.
Justin, is freedom.
We're looking for freedom forsomething from addiction, from
pain, from trauma, from, fromjust the emotional turmoil of
(04:37):
life.
What if that freedom that youare so desperate for is hiding
behind that thing that yourefuse to face?
Think about that for just amoment.
What if the freedom that you areso desperately needing in your
(04:57):
life right now is hiding behindthat thing that you refuse to
face?
Because I'll tell you, thisfamily, I tried it.
I can testify to this.
You will never outrun What youwon't confront,
Justin (05:15):
You know when you said something earlier, Dan?
This is one of the hardeststeps, right, to get real, to
get raw, to get honest, to lookat that person in the mirror,
that if I'm being honest, Ididn't even like myself when I
looked in that mirror.
And there are still days when Ilift my head and look in the
mirror and I say, man, what am Ilooking at?
(05:35):
But Dan, there's hope.
There is help.
That is why it is so importantthat you don't skip these steps.
Look, if you're having troubleadmitting something even to
yourself, go back to step oneand realize that you're not in
this alone and that your life isunmanageable and that you need
(05:55):
the power of God to help you andthen surrender your will to him
and what he does.
He comes in and he fills youwith his presence.
The Holy Spirit is the powersource of God that he places in
you.
When you truly surrender, nothalf-heartedly, but
wholeheartedly, and then you cannot only pick up your face and
look in the mirror, you can say,that's not who I am, and I want
(06:18):
healed from this because that'snot what I wanna be anymore.
That's not what I want toidentify with anymore.
But man, it takes us being realand saying, what in my life?
It is not who I want to beanymore.
Dan (06:33):
And there's so much truth in that.
There's power in self inventory.
And one of the things that wetry to do, Justin, is we, we
protect ourselves with denial.
We protect ourselves withdefensiveness, and every once in
a while we try to throwdistraction in that.
And what a deadly combinationbrother.
(06:55):
Denial.
Defensiveness, and distraction.
We say things like, I'm fine.
We say things like, that's inthe past, I've moved on.
But behind closed doors, we'restill bleeding Justin, but
behind closed doors will, we'restill hurting, but we look at
(07:16):
people in church and I'm fine.
We look at people at work and wetell everybody, I'm fine.
We look at past traumas and wetry to convince ourselves and
we, we fail at it justmiserably.
Justin, we fail at it.
We try to tell ourselves that'sin the past, I'm moving on, but
(07:39):
behind closed doors stillhurting.
Some of us are still cryingourselves to sleep from past
traumas and pains.
But I love what the Bible tellsus, Justin, in the Book of
Lamentations, and I love thisbook just completely.
There's one of my favoritescriptures of all time here.
I'm not gonna say it today,that's for another episode.
(08:03):
But one of my favoritescriptures of all time is in the
Book of Lamentations.
What I love about Lamentationsis Jeremiah the prophet wrote
this and he's lamenting.
Because the, the kingdom ofIsrael and Judah have fallen,
bro, they have been takencaptive and God warned them
(08:25):
through the prophets for yearsand years and years, but they
just didn't listen.
Now Israel is in their rockbottom moment and the prophet
Jeremiah.
Writes a powerful scripture inLamentations 3:40 says, let us
(08:46):
examine our ways and test themand let us return to the Lord.
Now I wanna talk about thatscripture for just a moment.
It says, let us examine, andthat's what step four is, bro.
We're examining ourselves.
We are taking a real selfinventory of ourselves.
(09:08):
We are examining ourselves andtesting them.
What are those things in my lifethat I'm hiding?
What are those things in my lifethat I'm, that I'm showing
people?
The good side of me, my churchface, my work face.
My happy face, but inside I'mcrying.
(09:31):
I'm hurting, and I love thispart.
And let us return them to theLord.
Not to drugs.
Not to alcohol.
That's not what Jeremiah said.
Let, let's take an inventory ofourself and, and let's return
back to dope as a comfort.
Return back to alcohol as acomfort.
(09:51):
Turn back to whatever type ofaddiction that you have.
He says, let us return thesethings that we've examined to
the Lord.
Why family?
Because that's the only placeour help is gonna come from.
Justin.
It's from the Lord.
That's what David said.
He said, my help comes from theLord family.
(10:13):
That's where your help is gonnacome from, from the Lord.
And as good as all theseprograms are, as good as all
these steps are, as good as all,our clinicians and, and
everything that you and I have,all the available resources that
you and I have.
As good as they are, they arepeople, Justin, they are things
(10:36):
and they are going to fail us,but God will never fail us.
will never fail us.
And that's what Jeremiah'ssaying here.
He's let, he's examiningeverything that Israel did
wrong.
And there was a lot, Justin readthe Old Testament.
(10:57):
You read First and Second Kings,and then you get into the
Chronicles and you will see howafter David and Solomon, how
just after generation, aftergeneration, these kings get
further and further and furtheraway from God to where God
eventually has to take his handoff of them and they're crashing
(11:18):
and burning.
And Jeremiah's sitting here andhe's lamenting and he's looking
at these things and he'sexamining them and he's testing
them.
And one of the most importantthings that he does is he
returns these things back to theLord.
Justin (11:34):
You know something about that Dan Israel at this time in
Judah, that he's lamenting over,they were being taken captive.
But the thing that was thepeople that were taking them
captive.
We're the very same people thatthey let come in and trade with
them when God said not to.
(11:55):
So my question is to thelistener, what are you allowing
in your life?
What are you trading with theworld that God says not to,
because that's what's gonna takeyou captive.
That's why it takeswholeheartedness.
What are you flirting with?
You can't walk with the Lord anddance with the devil on the side
and think that you're going toget to where you need to be.
(12:17):
So when it says examine.
Your ways.
It doesn't say examine theirways.
God knows that's wrong.
You should know it's wrong.
If you're sitting here andyou're wondering why you're
still struggling with youranger, what are you flirting
with in the world that invitesanger in?
If you're sitting here andyou're still wondering why
you're having financialproblems, what are you playing
(12:39):
with in the world that you keepspending your money on that you
know you shouldn't?
Because that's what's holdingyou captive.
Is it the social media?
You wonder why you don't have agood marriage, that you sit on
your sofa and you watch Facebookfor three hours.
I know I've done it.
I've caught myself doing it timeand time again, but what does it
say?
Examine your ways, test them,and return to the Lord.
(13:00):
That's the beauty of it.
God is saying, return to me.
Don't wait in the wilderness.
Just come like we talked aboutlast week.
Dan (13:08):
And that's the key thing, Justin, that that's the key
right there.
That is right here will save youyears and years and years of
heartache and struggle.
Family that I went through thatso many of us have went through
is giving it back to God, theonly one that can take the
(13:29):
weight.
The only one that can take thepain that are suffering, who
wants to?
Justin?
Who wants to?
The Bible tells us to cast allour cares.
Some version say in anxieties,says to cast all your cares onto
(13:49):
the Lord because he cares foryou.
I don't know too many peopleunless there's money attached to
it that want to hear about yourproblems.
Care enough about you toactually let you drop a bunch of
heavy weight on them.
But Jesus loves you and I somuch listener that he will take
(14:12):
your pain.
He will take that thing thatyou're hiding, and, and tucking
at in the back of the closet andyou've been telling everybody
you're fine, you're not.
Stop lying and let's be realwith ourselves.
I'm talking to that personthat's been going to church and
saying, that's in the past I'vemoved on, Jesus loves you so
(14:33):
much that he's willing to takeall that hurt, all that past,
all that trauma, all thatweight.
Take it off you.
And here's the thing, Justin, ifyou leave it, you don't have to
come back with it.
Justin (14:50):
It's like a bandaid.
We have coping mechanisms in ourlives that we grew up with, and
that's just changed over time.
But we like to put that bandaidon it.
We like to just keep slapping abandaid on it and then we'll
slap another one and then we'llslap another one and then we'll
slap another one.
And what happens is that woundthat was meant to heal, because
(15:11):
let me tell you, time does notheal all wounds, what does
cleaning that wound, because ifnot, it'll fester and it'll
start to infect every other areaof your life.
Sometimes the problem you haveisn't your real problem.
It's something else that youjust don't want to admit.
If you open up and let Jesus inand you expose it to the light,
(15:32):
my mom used to tell me everynight she'd put a bandaid on me.
'cause I'd fall down a lot.
I was a little fat kid whotripped over his own feet.
So when I went down, I went downhard and every time my mom would
put a bandaid on it, she'd putNeosporin on it, and then when
I'd go to bed, she'd say, okay,take that bandaid off so we can
let it air out.
So what are you not willing tolet air out?
(15:54):
Because Jesus Christ, if youexpose it to the light, there is
a healing that cannot be foundanywhere else.
Psalm 139:23-24, this is, it's adangerous prayer.
I'm just gonna be honest withyou guys.
This is why you need the HolySpirit.
This is why you have to have thehelp of God.
Search me, oh God, test mythoughts, know my heart, and
(16:19):
point out the things in me thatoffend you.
Are you willing to look at Godand say, search me, because
guess what?
God already knows you.
So when you ask him to searchyou, it's not him searching you.
The part comes when it says.
Point out the things in me thatoffend you and place me back on
(16:43):
the path of righteousness.
So many of us want to come toGod with this baggage, but we
don't want to set it down.
We wanna say, God, that thatbackpack's mine, that, that you,
you can't handle that.
Who are you to think God can'thandle it?
And who are you to think thatGod doesn't already know?
(17:03):
It takes us coming to thatmoment of real, raw, honest that
I can't, like we said in thevery beginning, when I can't,
God can
Dan (17:14):
so good.
You sitting there talking aboutthat cut and I was thinking,
when I was a kid, we'd sit thereand, Justin just fly up and down
the, the road on our bikes andevery once in a while, man, you
didn't check your shoestringsand they'd get tied up in the
pedals and the next thing youknow, you are just toppling.
(17:35):
And having road rash and cutsand, and bruises and scrapes and
all that stuff.
And you'd walk in that house andbefore they put the bandaid on
it, man, my mom would get thatold antiseptic spray.
Spread all over you, becausemom's, my mom was like but we
gotta clean it first before wecan put a bandaid on it.
(17:57):
We gotta clean it.
And Justin, man, that part stungso bad.
It was so uncomfortable.
But Justin, like you said, ifyou didn't clean it and we left
it, it spreads, it would becomeinfected.
And then what would turn intowhat was a little scrape.
(18:17):
Now you're dealing withsomething even more major.
Think about this.
This is why David said thisprayer.
Search me God, know my heart.
See if there's any offense inme.
That's what the NIV says.
See if there's any offense inme.
Why?
(18:38):
Because if we don't remove that,what's it do?
Justin?
It's gonna infect and it's gonnaspread.
Are we willing to allow God todo that in our lives?
That's why I told you at thevery beginning of this podcast,
this is a tough step.
This is where a lot of peopleget hung up.
(19:00):
We got, we have no problemsaying that, God, I, I'm
powerless.
We got no problem realizing thatthere's something bigger than
us.
We don't have a problem withsaying, God, not my will, but
your will.
But now God's saying, okay,here's some things that we need
to clean out of you before itcauses something even deeper.
(19:25):
That's where things start to getrough, but God, Justin, God
doesn't search you to shame you.
He searches you so you could beset free.
Think about that for just amoment.
Family, God already knows.
(19:47):
That's the thing he alreadyknows.
So when we make this prayer, Godsearch me, know my heart.
He's not doing it to shame youbecause God's gonna do what
you're gonna ask him to do.
He's going to expose things inyour life.
That could be stumbling blocks.
(20:07):
He's gonna expose people in yourlife.
Come on now.
He might start exposing peoplein your life that could be a
stumbling block for you.
Are you bold enough to step intowhat you're praying?
Because it is a bold prayer?
It is a dangerous prayer, butthis is where real change
happens.
(20:28):
Are you willing?
To allow God to search you, toexpose those things, those
people that could be aninfection in your heart, in your
life, that's gotta get cleanedout.
He's not doing it to shame youfamily.
He's doing it to set you free.
(20:50):
John chapter four.
I encourage you to go read thatJohn chapter four.
You'll read about this woman atthis well, but.
Just to break it down for you.
the Bible tells us she came tothis at noon.
She was alone because of herpast.
I'm sure she was ashamed.
(21:11):
I'm sure she was coming at a hotat the hottest time at noon.
Come on, bro.
In the desert.
I'm sure she was trying to avoidpeople.
Jesus met her in a place ofisolation, and that was what was
so powerful because see, thedisciples didn't want to go to
(21:34):
Samaria.
They sat and complained thewhole time.
So Jesus sent them off to go dobusy work.
Jesus knew exactly what he wasdoing.
and this woman comes here that'sbusted.
Broken, just baggage boundwoman.
Justin comes in alone, ashamed,trying to avoid, the, the eyes
(22:00):
of people and Jesus and all hislove and his compassion meets
her in that place of isolation,and he didn't expose her her
sins to embarrass her.
He exposed her to offer livingwater, and that's what was so,
that was what was so powerful.
(22:22):
Jesus didn't avoid her story,Justin.
He stepped right into it.
And he said, I know all of it,and I'm still here.
Family.
He knows everything about you.
The worst parts of you, thoseparts that you don't ever want
to let in.
You know what I'm talking about?
Those parts of our lives,Justin, that are tucked deep in
(22:45):
the closet that only very fewpeople know.
I'm telling you right now,Jesus.
Knows all of it.
And Jesus is saying today thatI'm
Justin (22:57):
still here.
I love that'cause that that'sthe question for the listener
today and even myself.
What part of my life is Jesussitting there waiting for me to
meet him at?
And we talk about that, and oneof my favorite parts of that
scripture is she has this talkwith Jesus.
(23:19):
She has this encounter and hetells her.
What she did.
You're right, you don't justhave five husbands.
You don't just, you're notmarried.
You have five husbands andyou're not even married to the
guy you're living with.
And then she says, surely thisman is a Christ.
Why?
Because he knew her.
(23:39):
He knew the parts of her thatnobody else knew, and then the
pot, she went there for waterwith shame.
Jesus filled her with thatliving water and the pot she
came with.
She left at the well, and shewent and ran and told others
about Jesus Christ and who hewas and the Messiah.
And that is what Jesus wants usto do.
(24:00):
He wants us to bring that brokenpot that don't hold the right
kind water, and he wants us toget filled with him.
The living water the Bible tellsus what is the greatest
commandment.
To love the Lord your God withall your heart, all your mind,
all your strength, all yoursoul.
You know what I think we fail torealize that word all means all.
He doesn't just want the part ofyou that you show, the world
(24:22):
that you smile and show thechurch on Sunday mornings.
He wants the part of you thatgoes home and cries until your
pillow at night because youcan't get it right.
He wants the part of you thatyou don't want anybody else to
see.
He wants that part of your heartthat's been stomped on 50
million times and you feel likeyou just.
Can't let anybody in becauseguess what?
He can't come in.
(24:42):
Revelations 3:20 behold, I standat the door at Knock, Meaning,
if you just let him in, he canchange.
But in order to let him in, yougotta come to that door and that
door is that problem that you'renot willing to face?
Is he knocking on your hearttoday and saying, let me come
in.
Let me change you.
(25:05):
Answer it, get real, get raw,get honest.
It's gonna hurt.
One of the hardest things forme, Dan, when I was in my
recovery and this, so myrecovery, I, I was already clean
from drugs and alcohol.
My recovery was over life.
And I said that in thebeginning.
It's, it's a, it's a lifetime ofbad decisions and the
consequences afterwards.
(25:27):
And I was sitting there and Iwas working my inventory and I
thought about my son.
I love my son to death, but ifI'm being real, I was angry at
my son for what his mom did withhim to me.
She would use him as a tool toget what she wanted out of me.
(25:47):
And it hurt, but I had to getreal with myself and say, I'm
upset over this God, and itneeds healed.
And when it did.
It changed.
Now that doesn't mean therelationship just sprouted and
bloomed and all these greatthings happened, but that
resentment, I was open, my hearttowards him changed.
(26:11):
And here's the thing about it,guys.
God doesn't want to change theother person in your life.
He wants to change you.
He's not trying to changeeveryone around you.
He wants to change you in themiddle of your circumstances.
But we gotta be willing to getreal, get raw, and get honest
and say, Lord, I need change.
Dan (26:30):
So good Justin.
And that's the thing, Goddoesn't walk away when he sees
the real you.
Amen.
God doesn't walk away when hesees the real me.
He leans in and just like he didwith that woman you see the, the
truth didn't shame her guys.
It set her free.
The truth shall set you free.
(26:53):
That's what the Bible says.
It set her free and that sametruth, that set that woman free
is standing in front of youright now.
That
Justin (27:06):
same truth, The Bible says if you want to be forgiven,
confess your sins to God.
Confess your trespasses to oneanother and pray for one
another.
So that you may be healed.
If you want healed, it's gonnatake you getting real.
It's gonna take you getting raw.
(27:26):
It's gonna take you gettinghonest.
And that truth that Dan talkedabout, you shall know the truth,
and the truth shall set youfree, not, might not, maybe
shall.
That's an all-encompassing word,meaning will and continue on
even after.
Dan (27:45):
And that truth is standing.
Here today, that truth issitting in front of us today.
That truth family is in thispodcast, not me or Justin, but
I'm talking about the HolySpirit.
I'm talking about Jesus.
You don't have to haveeverything fixed right now,
(28:05):
family.
You're not gonna have everythingfixed.
But in this step, as we getready to wrap this podcast up.
You got to be honest becausefamily, that's where healing
begins.
You seeing God as good as he is,as great as he is, God can't
(28:28):
heal the version of you you'repretending to be.
He heals the one Justin you'rewilling to bring to him.
I want you to think about thatfor just a moment.
Family.
'cause I've been there.
I brought the fake side of me toJesus.
I brought the I'm okay and I'mnot okay side to Jesus.
(28:52):
I brought the I'm fine and Iwasn't fine side of me to Jesus.
I brought the, it's in the past.
Side of me, and it wasn't in thepast side of Jesus, but it's in
this step.
Justin, as we get ready to wrapthis thing up, this is in this
step where you gotta get realwith yourself.
(29:13):
You gotta be honest withyourself.
You gotta be open with yourselfand stop giving God the version
of you that you are pretendingto be.
'cause he can only heal whatyou're willing to bring to him.
And in this inventory this step,are you willing to give him it
(29:34):
all?
Are you willing to allow Godinto your heart and into your
life?
And make that bold prayer,Justin, search me God, examine
my ways.
Are you willing to do thattoday, Justin, as we get ready
to wrap this podcast up,brother, is there anything that
you want to share with ourfamily as we get ready to close
(29:56):
for this week?
Justin (29:59):
Once again, guys, I wanna say thank you for
listening.
Thank you for letting us intoyour hearts.
Like Dan said, there's a truthhere with us, and it's not us.
It's the Holy Spirit.
And guys, if you're strugglingto take that next step to get
(30:19):
real, to get raw, to get honest,go back to step one.
Understand that when you can't,God can.
And guys, if you need help, ifyou need somebody to talk to,
reach out.
Every week we ask for supportand you guys get it.
(30:39):
We don't want your money.
We're just asking for prayer.
But guys.
Let us know how we can supportyou, because this is not just
about me and Dan.
This is not just about rootedand recovered.
It is about the family ofChrist.
It is about the forever familythat we become a part of when we
get real with ourselves andsurrender our lives to God,
(31:04):
guys, let your prayer request bemade known.
We are here for you because weare here for each other man,
like and subscribe to the page.
Share it with others.
Help us get this message out andman, give it to God.
Dan (31:23):
Amen, let me give you a final key thought.
Family.
That woman she didn't leaveashamed.
She left revived.
See, she came with all kinds ofsecrets.
In one encounter with Jesusfamily, she left with a
testimony.
She came to avoid people, andshe left running, telling
(31:45):
everyone, brother.
And if Jesus could meet her inher shame and her lowest, he'll
meet you in yours.
So you gotta stop hiding behindyour pain that you were never
meant to carry family.
Today's the day, we gotta faceit, we gotta speak it.
(32:06):
And more importantly, we gottasurrender it because your scars
don't scare Jesus.
They don't scare him.
What they do is they invite himin and what he did for her,
he'll do for you today.
If you will allow him.
(32:26):
Like Justin said, he's knocking.
Let him in.
Open the door and let Jesus intoday.
Guys, we thank you so very much.
You are loved, you are seen, youare not your past.
So until next time, familiesstay rooted, stay recovered, and
(32:47):
let's get to work.
You are not just surviving.
You are becoming, becomingrooted in truth, becoming
recovered by grace, and becomingthe person God always knew you
could be.
Thanks for joining us on Rootedin Recovered.
If this episode stirredsomething in you, don't keep it
(33:10):
to yourself.
Share it, live it, let it takeroot.
We'll see you next time righthere where scars become
testimonies and hope rises fromthe ashes.
This world doesn't hand outhealing.
It offers quick fixes, cheaphighes and empty promises, but
real recovery.
It takes roots.
Roots that dig deep into truth,into identity, into the
unshakeable grace of God.
We're not here to sugarcoat thestruggle.
(00:22):
We've lived it.
Addiction, shame, relapse,regret, but we've also seen
resurrection.
We've seen what happened.
Happens when broken people getanchored in something real
rooted and recovered is morethan a podcast.
It's a battleground for thesoul.
A place where scars tellstories, where scripture speaks
(00:43):
louder than shame, where freedomisn't just a word.
It's a war we win daily.
So if you're tired of surfacelevel answers, if you want truth
that convicts, hope that heals,and conversations that cut
through the noise, you're in theright place.
Welcome to Rooted and Recovered.
Justin (01:06):
Welcome everybody to another episode of Rooted and
Recovered.
I'm Justin Miller, along withDan Pyles.
today.
I got a question.
Have you ever stood in front ofthe mirror and you just didn't
wanna look?
You ever just stood there andthought, man, I can't look in
the mirror.
I can't face what's on.
I can't face what's in thatmirror?
(01:30):
Guys, a lot of us find ourselvesthere in our recovery.
A lot of us find ourselves therein our life, and if we're being
honest, there's times when I dothat, there's times I guarantee
when Dan does that.
But guys, there's a truth.
That we need to realize youcan't heal what you won't face.
(01:55):
Step four tells us, madesearching, and fearless moral
inventory of ourselves.
That means looking at ourselvesreal, raw, and honest, and
asking the question, what am Itoo afraid to admit even to
(02:16):
myself?
Dan (02:18):
this step right here, step four, I'm gonna let you know
right now.
It's tough.
This is a tough step, butJustin, this step right here,
step four is where healingreally starts because step four
tells you that in me that wemade a searching and fearless
(02:43):
moral inventory of our selves.
When you talked about thatmirror moment, I had a mirror
moment.
Eight years ago, I seen myselfin the mirror after a 14 year
addiction.
Justin, I had that mirror momentwhen I seen what I thought I had
(03:07):
control of what I thought.
I was.
I was in charge.
I wasn't addicted, I wasn'tstruggling.
I wasn't this, then I seenmyself in the mirror and there's
a, there, the, the reality is,the truth is just in that you
(03:32):
and I can't heal what we won'tface.
I believe for myself a hundredpercent.
And maybe you can too, maybeJustin, maybe you can testify to
this and maybe the listener, thelistener can testify to this,
that you can't heal what youwon't face.
It wasn't until I probably sawmyself in the mirror hundreds of
(03:53):
times, but it wasn't until thatrock bottom moment that I
finally saw, like really sawmyself in the mirror and I was
like, oh boy.
This is a little bit different.
The, the question that I had,and you brought up a great
(04:13):
question, Justin.
The, the question that I've gotfor myself and for you Justin,
and even for the listener, iswhat if the freedom.
And that's what we sodesperately need.
Justin, is freedom.
We're looking for freedom forsomething from addiction, from
pain, from trauma, from, fromjust the emotional turmoil of
(04:37):
life.
What if that freedom that youare so desperate for is hiding
behind that thing that yourefuse to face?
Think about that for just amoment.
What if the freedom that you areso desperately needing in your
(04:57):
life right now is hiding behindthat thing that you refuse to
face?
Because I'll tell you, thisfamily, I tried it.
I can testify to this.
You will never outrun What youwon't confront,
Justin (05:15):
You know when you said something earlier, Dan?
This is one of the hardeststeps, right, to get real, to
get raw, to get honest, to lookat that person in the mirror,
that if I'm being honest, Ididn't even like myself when I
looked in that mirror.
And there are still days when Ilift my head and look in the
mirror and I say, man, what am Ilooking at?
(05:35):
But Dan, there's hope.
There is help.
That is why it is so importantthat you don't skip these steps.
Look, if you're having troubleadmitting something even to
yourself, go back to step oneand realize that you're not in
this alone and that your life isunmanageable and that you need
(05:55):
the power of God to help you andthen surrender your will to him
and what he does.
He comes in and he fills youwith his presence.
The Holy Spirit is the powersource of God that he places in
you.
When you truly surrender, nothalf-heartedly, but
wholeheartedly, and then you cannot only pick up your face and
look in the mirror, you can say,that's not who I am, and I want
(06:18):
healed from this because that'snot what I wanna be anymore.
That's not what I want toidentify with anymore.
But man, it takes us being realand saying, what in my life?
It is not who I want to beanymore.
Dan (06:33):
And there's so much truth in that.
There's power in self inventory.
And one of the things that wetry to do, Justin, is we, we
protect ourselves with denial.
We protect ourselves withdefensiveness, and every once in
a while we try to throwdistraction in that.
And what a deadly combinationbrother.
(06:55):
Denial.
Defensiveness, and distraction.
We say things like, I'm fine.
We say things like, that's inthe past, I've moved on.
But behind closed doors, we'restill bleeding Justin, but
behind closed doors will, we'restill hurting, but we look at
(07:16):
people in church and I'm fine.
We look at people at work and wetell everybody, I'm fine.
We look at past traumas and wetry to convince ourselves and
we, we fail at it justmiserably.
Justin, we fail at it.
We try to tell ourselves that'sin the past, I'm moving on, but
(07:39):
behind closed doors stillhurting.
Some of us are still cryingourselves to sleep from past
traumas and pains.
But I love what the Bible tellsus, Justin, in the Book of
Lamentations, and I love thisbook just completely.
There's one of my favoritescriptures of all time here.
I'm not gonna say it today,that's for another episode.
(08:03):
But one of my favoritescriptures of all time is in the
Book of Lamentations.
What I love about Lamentationsis Jeremiah the prophet wrote
this and he's lamenting.
Because the, the kingdom ofIsrael and Judah have fallen,
bro, they have been takencaptive and God warned them
(08:25):
through the prophets for yearsand years and years, but they
just didn't listen.
Now Israel is in their rockbottom moment and the prophet
Jeremiah.
Writes a powerful scripture inLamentations 3:40 says, let us
(08:46):
examine our ways and test themand let us return to the Lord.
Now I wanna talk about thatscripture for just a moment.
It says, let us examine, andthat's what step four is, bro.
We're examining ourselves.
We are taking a real selfinventory of ourselves.
(09:08):
We are examining ourselves andtesting them.
What are those things in my lifethat I'm hiding?
What are those things in my lifethat I'm, that I'm showing
people?
The good side of me, my churchface, my work face.
My happy face, but inside I'mcrying.
(09:31):
I'm hurting, and I love thispart.
And let us return them to theLord.
Not to drugs.
Not to alcohol.
That's not what Jeremiah said.
Let, let's take an inventory ofourself and, and let's return
back to dope as a comfort.
Return back to alcohol as acomfort.
(09:51):
Turn back to whatever type ofaddiction that you have.
He says, let us return thesethings that we've examined to
the Lord.
Why family?
Because that's the only placeour help is gonna come from.
Justin.
It's from the Lord.
That's what David said.
He said, my help comes from theLord family.
(10:13):
That's where your help is gonnacome from, from the Lord.
And as good as all theseprograms are, as good as all
these steps are, as good as all,our clinicians and, and
everything that you and I have,all the available resources that
you and I have.
As good as they are, they arepeople, Justin, they are things
(10:36):
and they are going to fail us,but God will never fail us.
will never fail us.
And that's what Jeremiah'ssaying here.
He's let, he's examiningeverything that Israel did
wrong.
And there was a lot, Justin readthe Old Testament.
(10:57):
You read First and Second Kings,and then you get into the
Chronicles and you will see howafter David and Solomon, how
just after generation, aftergeneration, these kings get
further and further and furtheraway from God to where God
eventually has to take his handoff of them and they're crashing
(11:18):
and burning.
And Jeremiah's sitting here andhe's lamenting and he's looking
at these things and he'sexamining them and he's testing
them.
And one of the most importantthings that he does is he
returns these things back to theLord.
Justin (11:34):
You know something about that Dan Israel at this time in
Judah, that he's lamenting over,they were being taken captive.
But the thing that was thepeople that were taking them
captive.
We're the very same people thatthey let come in and trade with
them when God said not to.
(11:55):
So my question is to thelistener, what are you allowing
in your life?
What are you trading with theworld that God says not to,
because that's what's gonna takeyou captive.
That's why it takeswholeheartedness.
What are you flirting with?
You can't walk with the Lord anddance with the devil on the side
and think that you're going toget to where you need to be.
(12:17):
So when it says examine.
Your ways.
It doesn't say examine theirways.
God knows that's wrong.
You should know it's wrong.
If you're sitting here andyou're wondering why you're
still struggling with youranger, what are you flirting
with in the world that invitesanger in?
If you're sitting here andyou're still wondering why
you're having financialproblems, what are you playing
(12:39):
with in the world that you keepspending your money on that you
know you shouldn't?
Because that's what's holdingyou captive.
Is it the social media?
You wonder why you don't have agood marriage, that you sit on
your sofa and you watch Facebookfor three hours.
I know I've done it.
I've caught myself doing it timeand time again, but what does it
say?
Examine your ways, test them,and return to the Lord.
(13:00):
That's the beauty of it.
God is saying, return to me.
Don't wait in the wilderness.
Just come like we talked aboutlast week.
Dan (13:08):
And that's the key thing, Justin, that that's the key
right there.
That is right here will save youyears and years and years of
heartache and struggle.
Family that I went through thatso many of us have went through
is giving it back to God, theonly one that can take the
(13:29):
weight.
The only one that can take thepain that are suffering, who
wants to?
Justin?
Who wants to?
The Bible tells us to cast allour cares.
Some version say in anxieties,says to cast all your cares onto
(13:49):
the Lord because he cares foryou.
I don't know too many peopleunless there's money attached to
it that want to hear about yourproblems.
Care enough about you toactually let you drop a bunch of
heavy weight on them.
But Jesus loves you and I somuch listener that he will take
(14:12):
your pain.
He will take that thing thatyou're hiding, and, and tucking
at in the back of the closet andyou've been telling everybody
you're fine, you're not.
Stop lying and let's be realwith ourselves.
I'm talking to that personthat's been going to church and
saying, that's in the past I'vemoved on, Jesus loves you so
(14:33):
much that he's willing to takeall that hurt, all that past,
all that trauma, all thatweight.
Take it off you.
And here's the thing, Justin, ifyou leave it, you don't have to
come back with it.
Justin (14:50):
It's like a bandaid.
We have coping mechanisms in ourlives that we grew up with, and
that's just changed over time.
But we like to put that bandaidon it.
We like to just keep slapping abandaid on it and then we'll
slap another one and then we'llslap another one and then we'll
slap another one.
And what happens is that woundthat was meant to heal, because
(15:11):
let me tell you, time does notheal all wounds, what does
cleaning that wound, because ifnot, it'll fester and it'll
start to infect every other areaof your life.
Sometimes the problem you haveisn't your real problem.
It's something else that youjust don't want to admit.
If you open up and let Jesus inand you expose it to the light,
(15:32):
my mom used to tell me everynight she'd put a bandaid on me.
'cause I'd fall down a lot.
I was a little fat kid whotripped over his own feet.
So when I went down, I went downhard and every time my mom would
put a bandaid on it, she'd putNeosporin on it, and then when
I'd go to bed, she'd say, okay,take that bandaid off so we can
let it air out.
So what are you not willing tolet air out?
(15:54):
Because Jesus Christ, if youexpose it to the light, there is
a healing that cannot be foundanywhere else.
Psalm 139:23-24, this is, it's adangerous prayer.
I'm just gonna be honest withyou guys.
This is why you need the HolySpirit.
This is why you have to have thehelp of God.
Search me, oh God, test mythoughts, know my heart, and
(16:19):
point out the things in me thatoffend you.
Are you willing to look at Godand say, search me, because
guess what?
God already knows you.
So when you ask him to searchyou, it's not him searching you.
The part comes when it says.
Point out the things in me thatoffend you and place me back on
(16:43):
the path of righteousness.
So many of us want to come toGod with this baggage, but we
don't want to set it down.
We wanna say, God, that thatbackpack's mine, that, that you,
you can't handle that.
Who are you to think God can'thandle it?
And who are you to think thatGod doesn't already know?
(17:03):
It takes us coming to thatmoment of real, raw, honest that
I can't, like we said in thevery beginning, when I can't,
God can
Dan (17:14):
so good.
You sitting there talking aboutthat cut and I was thinking,
when I was a kid, we'd sit thereand, Justin just fly up and down
the, the road on our bikes andevery once in a while, man, you
didn't check your shoestringsand they'd get tied up in the
pedals and the next thing youknow, you are just toppling.
(17:35):
And having road rash and cutsand, and bruises and scrapes and
all that stuff.
And you'd walk in that house andbefore they put the bandaid on
it, man, my mom would get thatold antiseptic spray.
Spread all over you, becausemom's, my mom was like but we
gotta clean it first before wecan put a bandaid on it.
(17:57):
We gotta clean it.
And Justin, man, that part stungso bad.
It was so uncomfortable.
But Justin, like you said, ifyou didn't clean it and we left
it, it spreads, it would becomeinfected.
And then what would turn intowhat was a little scrape.
(18:17):
Now you're dealing withsomething even more major.
Think about this.
This is why David said thisprayer.
Search me God, know my heart.
See if there's any offense inme.
That's what the NIV says.
See if there's any offense inme.
Why?
(18:38):
Because if we don't remove that,what's it do?
Justin?
It's gonna infect and it's gonnaspread.
Are we willing to allow God todo that in our lives?
That's why I told you at thevery beginning of this podcast,
this is a tough step.
This is where a lot of peopleget hung up.
(19:00):
We got, we have no problemsaying that, God, I, I'm
powerless.
We got no problem realizing thatthere's something bigger than
us.
We don't have a problem withsaying, God, not my will, but
your will.
But now God's saying, okay,here's some things that we need
to clean out of you before itcauses something even deeper.
(19:25):
That's where things start to getrough, but God, Justin, God
doesn't search you to shame you.
He searches you so you could beset free.
Think about that for just amoment.
Family, God already knows.
(19:47):
That's the thing he alreadyknows.
So when we make this prayer, Godsearch me, know my heart.
He's not doing it to shame youbecause God's gonna do what
you're gonna ask him to do.
He's going to expose things inyour life.
That could be stumbling blocks.
(20:07):
He's gonna expose people in yourlife.
Come on now.
He might start exposing peoplein your life that could be a
stumbling block for you.
Are you bold enough to step intowhat you're praying?
Because it is a bold prayer?
It is a dangerous prayer, butthis is where real change
happens.
(20:28):
Are you willing?
To allow God to search you, toexpose those things, those
people that could be aninfection in your heart, in your
life, that's gotta get cleanedout.
He's not doing it to shame youfamily.
He's doing it to set you free.
(20:50):
John chapter four.
I encourage you to go read thatJohn chapter four.
You'll read about this woman atthis well, but.
Just to break it down for you.
the Bible tells us she came tothis at noon.
She was alone because of herpast.
I'm sure she was ashamed.
(21:11):
I'm sure she was coming at a hotat the hottest time at noon.
Come on, bro.
In the desert.
I'm sure she was trying to avoidpeople.
Jesus met her in a place ofisolation, and that was what was
so powerful because see, thedisciples didn't want to go to
(21:34):
Samaria.
They sat and complained thewhole time.
So Jesus sent them off to go dobusy work.
Jesus knew exactly what he wasdoing.
and this woman comes here that'sbusted.
Broken, just baggage boundwoman.
Justin comes in alone, ashamed,trying to avoid, the, the eyes
(22:00):
of people and Jesus and all hislove and his compassion meets
her in that place of isolation,and he didn't expose her her
sins to embarrass her.
He exposed her to offer livingwater, and that's what was so,
that was what was so powerful.
(22:22):
Jesus didn't avoid her story,Justin.
He stepped right into it.
And he said, I know all of it,and I'm still here.
Family.
He knows everything about you.
The worst parts of you, thoseparts that you don't ever want
to let in.
You know what I'm talking about?
Those parts of our lives,Justin, that are tucked deep in
(22:45):
the closet that only very fewpeople know.
I'm telling you right now,Jesus.
Knows all of it.
And Jesus is saying today thatI'm
Justin (22:57):
still here.
I love that'cause that that'sthe question for the listener
today and even myself.
What part of my life is Jesussitting there waiting for me to
meet him at?
And we talk about that, and oneof my favorite parts of that
scripture is she has this talkwith Jesus.
(23:19):
She has this encounter and hetells her.
What she did.
You're right, you don't justhave five husbands.
You don't just, you're notmarried.
You have five husbands andyou're not even married to the
guy you're living with.
And then she says, surely thisman is a Christ.
Why?
Because he knew her.
(23:39):
He knew the parts of her thatnobody else knew, and then the
pot, she went there for waterwith shame.
Jesus filled her with thatliving water and the pot she
came with.
She left at the well, and shewent and ran and told others
about Jesus Christ and who hewas and the Messiah.
And that is what Jesus wants usto do.
(24:00):
He wants us to bring that brokenpot that don't hold the right
kind water, and he wants us toget filled with him.
The living water the Bible tellsus what is the greatest
commandment.
To love the Lord your God withall your heart, all your mind,
all your strength, all yoursoul.
You know what I think we fail torealize that word all means all.
He doesn't just want the part ofyou that you show, the world
(24:22):
that you smile and show thechurch on Sunday mornings.
He wants the part of you thatgoes home and cries until your
pillow at night because youcan't get it right.
He wants the part of you thatyou don't want anybody else to
see.
He wants that part of your heartthat's been stomped on 50
million times and you feel likeyou just.
Can't let anybody in becauseguess what?
He can't come in.
(24:42):
Revelations 3:20 behold, I standat the door at Knock, Meaning,
if you just let him in, he canchange.
But in order to let him in, yougotta come to that door and that
door is that problem that you'renot willing to face?
Is he knocking on your hearttoday and saying, let me come
in.
Let me change you.
(25:05):
Answer it, get real, get raw,get honest.
It's gonna hurt.
One of the hardest things forme, Dan, when I was in my
recovery and this, so myrecovery, I, I was already clean
from drugs and alcohol.
My recovery was over life.
And I said that in thebeginning.
It's, it's a, it's a lifetime ofbad decisions and the
consequences afterwards.
(25:27):
And I was sitting there and Iwas working my inventory and I
thought about my son.
I love my son to death, but ifI'm being real, I was angry at
my son for what his mom did withhim to me.
She would use him as a tool toget what she wanted out of me.
(25:47):
And it hurt, but I had to getreal with myself and say, I'm
upset over this God, and itneeds healed.
And when it did.
It changed.
Now that doesn't mean therelationship just sprouted and
bloomed and all these greatthings happened, but that
resentment, I was open, my hearttowards him changed.
(26:11):
And here's the thing about it,guys.
God doesn't want to change theother person in your life.
He wants to change you.
He's not trying to changeeveryone around you.
He wants to change you in themiddle of your circumstances.
But we gotta be willing to getreal, get raw, and get honest
and say, Lord, I need change.
Dan (26:30):
So good Justin.
And that's the thing, Goddoesn't walk away when he sees
the real you.
Amen.
God doesn't walk away when hesees the real me.
He leans in and just like he didwith that woman you see the, the
truth didn't shame her guys.
It set her free.
The truth shall set you free.
(26:53):
That's what the Bible says.
It set her free and that sametruth, that set that woman free
is standing in front of youright now.
That
Justin (27:06):
same truth, The Bible says if you want to be forgiven,
confess your sins to God.
Confess your trespasses to oneanother and pray for one
another.
So that you may be healed.
If you want healed, it's gonnatake you getting real.
It's gonna take you getting raw.
(27:26):
It's gonna take you gettinghonest.
And that truth that Dan talkedabout, you shall know the truth,
and the truth shall set youfree, not, might not, maybe
shall.
That's an all-encompassing word,meaning will and continue on
even after.
Dan (27:45):
And that truth is standing.
Here today, that truth issitting in front of us today.
That truth family is in thispodcast, not me or Justin, but
I'm talking about the HolySpirit.
I'm talking about Jesus.
You don't have to haveeverything fixed right now,
(28:05):
family.
You're not gonna have everythingfixed.
But in this step, as we getready to wrap this podcast up.
You got to be honest becausefamily, that's where healing
begins.
You seeing God as good as he is,as great as he is, God can't
(28:28):
heal the version of you you'repretending to be.
He heals the one Justin you'rewilling to bring to him.
I want you to think about thatfor just a moment.
Family.
'cause I've been there.
I brought the fake side of me toJesus.
I brought the I'm okay and I'mnot okay side to Jesus.
(28:52):
I brought the I'm fine and Iwasn't fine side of me to Jesus.
I brought the, it's in the past.
Side of me, and it wasn't in thepast side of Jesus, but it's in
this step.
Justin, as we get ready to wrapthis thing up, this is in this
step where you gotta get realwith yourself.
(29:13):
You gotta be honest withyourself.
You gotta be open with yourselfand stop giving God the version
of you that you are pretendingto be.
'cause he can only heal whatyou're willing to bring to him.
And in this inventory this step,are you willing to give him it
(29:34):
all?
Are you willing to allow Godinto your heart and into your
life?
And make that bold prayer,Justin, search me God, examine
my ways.
Are you willing to do thattoday, Justin, as we get ready
to wrap this podcast up,brother, is there anything that
you want to share with ourfamily as we get ready to close
(29:56):
for this week?
Justin (29:59):
Once again, guys, I wanna say thank you for
listening.
Thank you for letting us intoyour hearts.
Like Dan said, there's a truthhere with us, and it's not us.
It's the Holy Spirit.
And guys, if you're strugglingto take that next step to get
(30:19):
real, to get raw, to get honest,go back to step one.
Understand that when you can't,God can.
And guys, if you need help, ifyou need somebody to talk to,
reach out.
Every week we ask for supportand you guys get it.
(30:39):
We don't want your money.
We're just asking for prayer.
But guys.
Let us know how we can supportyou, because this is not just
about me and Dan.
This is not just about rootedand recovered.
It is about the family ofChrist.
It is about the forever familythat we become a part of when we
get real with ourselves andsurrender our lives to God,
(31:04):
guys, let your prayer request bemade known.
We are here for you because weare here for each other man,
like and subscribe to the page.
Share it with others.
Help us get this message out andman, give it to God.
Dan (31:23):
Amen, let me give you a final key thought.
Family.
That woman she didn't leaveashamed.
She left revived.
See, she came with all kinds ofsecrets.
In one encounter with Jesusfamily, she left with a
testimony.
She came to avoid people, andshe left running, telling
(31:45):
everyone, brother.
And if Jesus could meet her inher shame and her lowest, he'll
meet you in yours.
So you gotta stop hiding behindyour pain that you were never
meant to carry family.
Today's the day, we gotta faceit, we gotta speak it.
(32:06):
And more importantly, we gottasurrender it because your scars
don't scare Jesus.
They don't scare him.
What they do is they invite himin and what he did for her,
he'll do for you today.
If you will allow him.
(32:26):
Like Justin said, he's knocking.
Let him in.
Open the door and let Jesus intoday.
Guys, we thank you so very much.
You are loved, you are seen, youare not your past.
So until next time, familiesstay rooted, stay recovered, and
(32:47):
let's get to work.
You are not just surviving.
You are becoming, becomingrooted in truth, becoming
recovered by grace, and becomingthe person God always knew you
could be.
Thanks for joining us on Rootedin Recovered.
If this episode stirredsomething in you, don't keep it
(33:10):
to yourself.
Share it, live it, let it takeroot.
We'll see you next time righthere where scars become
testimonies and hope rises fromthe ashes.
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