29: Igniting the Sacred Feminine with Madhura Joshi

Send us a text

The sacred feminine is rising, not to reject masculinity but to restore balance in our lives and on our planet. In this soul-stirring conversation with feminine leadership coach Madhura Joshi, we explore what it truly means for women to "come back home" to themselves.

• The feminine journey is about "coming back home" to ourselves in a deep and sacred fashion
• Our culture has conditioned women to look outside themselves for validation when everything we need is inside
• The current feminine movement isn't about divorcing or being better than men, but finding sacred balance
• Women lose their power when they get stuck exclusively in masculine energy
• The connection between feminine energy and physical wellness, including vaginal health
• Madhura's personal transformation story after breaking free from a restrictive marriage
• The importance of women understanding their desires and learning the art of receiving
• Simple practices to reconnect with your feminine energy like mirror work and embodiment
• How to balance masculine and feminine energies in dating and relationships
• The power of surrender as a key aspect of femininity

Madhura shares her powerful personal journey from feeling shackled in a restricting marriage to experiencing a profound transformation after embracing her authentic feminine power. Her story illustrates how many women have disconnected from their feminine essence – not because they want to, but because they've never been taught how to access and embody it. We discuss how this disconnection manifests physically, emotionally, and energetically, and why reconnecting with your feminine core is crucial for your wellbeing and creative power.

This episode challenges common misconceptions about femininity and strength. Unlike earlier feminist movements that sometimes positioned women against men, today's feminine awakening is about balance and wholeness – understanding that both energies are essential but that many women have been forced to operate predominantly from their masculine side, depleting their true power source. We examine how this depletion affects everything from sexual wellness to financial abundance.

If you've been feeling exhausted, disconnected, or out of alignment, this conversation offers practical wisdom for reconnecting with your feminine essence through simple practices like mirror work, embodiment, and learning to receive. We discuss the art of surrender, the power of feminine sexuality, and how to bring these energies into modern dating and relationships.

Whether you're just beginning to explore your feminine nature or looking to deepen your connection to this sacred energy, this episode provides both the inspiration and practical guidance to support your journey home to yourself. Connect with your divine feminine power and watch how it transforms not just your life, but ripples out to heal our world.

You can find Madhura Joshi at:

https://therealmadhura.com/ 

https://www.instagram.com/therealmadhura?igsh=OTQ1dXA5cm04NW83

Looking for confirmation, guidance, or support in an area of life where you feel stuck, stagnant, or simply unclear of what to do next? Let's connect: book a complimentary Discovery Session with me, today!

Book a 30-min Discovery Session Here

Visit my YouTube Channel

Intuitive Mentor Mom on IG

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The sacred feminine is on the rise, and it's not
about rejecting our masculinecounterparts.
In today's episode, we explorethe igniting of the feminine
within, how it shows up, how youcan cultivate it, the
importance of our femininesurrender and more.
Listen in today with my friend,madhura Joshi, who's a feminine

(00:23):
leadership coach.
We're about to get started now,so here we go.
Welcome back to the IntuitiveMentor Mom podcast, where we
explore strategies forpracticing more self-love,
gratitude and finding new waysto empower ourselves in this
ever-changing healing adventureof life happening for us.
I'm your host, tara Michelle.

(00:44):
Let's get started.
All right, welcome back to theshow.
Us.
I'm your host, tara Michelle.
Let's get started.
All right, welcome back to theshow.
Everybody, I'm so excited.
This week I am here with one ofmy beautiful it's funny, I want
to call you like a soul sister.
I was going to say like aspiritual colleague.
So Madhura the real Madhura sheand I met through we actually
met in one of our spiritualcommunities and I've known you

(01:07):
for well.
I've known you virtually nowfor oh my God, it's been about
six or seven years.
It's been a long time.

Speaker 2 (01:15):
Probably longer than that.

Speaker 1 (01:17):
Yeah, cause I've been working with Tracy for almost
nine years now.

Speaker 2 (01:23):
Yeah, so I think since the beginning.
I think I came in before I gotpregnant.
Yeah, so he's going to be 10 inSeptember.
So that's amazing, that'samazing.

Speaker 1 (01:34):
So we y'all are going to be talking about?
We're going to be talking aboutigniting the feminine this week
and I'm really excited.
Medora is actually a leadershipcoach, she's a speaker, she's
an author.
I will be putting all of herinformation down in the links,
or I should not say the links,but in the show notes below.
We were recently on a weekendevent and really talking about

(01:57):
this igniting of the feminine,and so I wanted to bring her on
the show because she herself hasgone through a massive
transformation, and so much sothat now she gives back to the
world and supports women throughthis type of transformation.
And I think you're going to beintrigued by her story.
I know I have been as I'vewatched it over the years and

(02:18):
then I myself have gone throughmassive levels of transformation
in the realm of, you know,really igniting who I am on the
feminine and all of the thingsas woman and queen and all of
that.
So we're going to talk aboutthat today.
And welcome to the podcast,madura.

(02:39):
Thank you so much for being aguest with me today.
I'm excited.

Speaker 2 (02:42):
Thank you for having me.
I'm super excited to be hereand talk about all the things
feminine and what women arecraving on this planet, and I
think, what the planet iscraving.

Speaker 1 (02:55):
And when you say what women are craving, how do you
see it?
What do you see as womencraving right now?

Speaker 2 (03:01):
I think women are craving coming back home.
Let's put it that way.
It's this coming back to selfin a very deep and sacred
fashion, where they feel seen,they feel heard, they feel
desired, not just by the outsideworld but by themselves, like
for themselves.

Speaker 1 (03:21):
It's this coming home to realize who they were born
to be, their purpose, theirmission, that kind of thing 100%
and I love that you said this,coming back to self, like inward
, because I feel so much of ourculture, so much of our world.
And, by the way, I wanted tomention, madhura is actually in
Canada.
I'm in the US, so those of youin Canada you need to seek her

(03:43):
out anywhere in the world, seekher out.
But if you want to like see herreal, live and in person and
all your speaking events, arethey in Canada?

Speaker 2 (03:51):
No, I'm actually in Miami in September, I believe,
oh my God, yes, so I'll be in.
Miami at a woman's conferencein September on women's
leadership and feminineleadership, and I'm in Dallas
for another conference in August.
So and when.

Speaker 1 (04:08):
When you're in Dallas , you have to let me know,
because I'm just two and a halfhours from Dallas, perfect, yes,
so let's plan that.
And Rebecca, rebecca is inMiami, so we should let her know
when you're going to be there,cause then you guys should maybe
meet.
But absolutely we have to meetour people in person.
But I but I share all thatbecause I want all of you out

(04:30):
there listening, you know, ifyou get an opportunity to work
with Madura or see her speak oryou know, just experience her,
it's awesome virtually here.
We've been on a lot of programstogether, but one of the things
I wanted to point out thatyou'd mentioned is this inward

(04:51):
Because, as I was saying before,I got totally derailed by a
squirrel moment is so much ofour culture has been designed to
have us look outside ofourselves for the validation or
look outside of ourselves forthat thing that we think we need
, when it is always inside.

(05:11):
It's always been inside.
The whole job is an inside job,and what I constantly talk
about on this show is if yourworld is reflecting in a way
that you don't like it, it issimply reflecting what's
happening on the inside or whatyou haven't been looking at from
the inside.

(05:32):
So I love that you said that,cause I do think you know, and I
think one of the things I worryabout right now which it's not
my problem to worry about, butit does come up for me is as we
are moving and stepping intothis female feminine movement
again.
What I don't want to see happenis what happened back in the

(05:54):
movement back in the 40s and 50s, where it's we're divorcing men
, we're better than men, we'reequal to or better than men, or
we can do what you can do.
I'm not saying there's anythingwrong with that.
Well, yes, I'm going to admit Idon't like that program Because

(06:15):
I don't believe we can do itwithout the yin and yang, and I
do feel that movement servedsomewhat of a purpose in the
spiritual evolution of things,but hopefully to show us that
that level of contrast is notwhat I feel this movement is

(06:36):
about today.
This is really something deeper, something more sacred,
something more spiritual.
I don't know.
Tell me your thoughts on that,because I see it as so much more
.
The word tribal comes up, but Ido see this thing where there's
a lot of male bashing again orI don't need men, or I'm great

(06:58):
without this partner, okay, butthere's still the yin and the
yang I think.

Speaker 2 (07:07):
I think we went into this whole me too movement and
went and the pendulum swang inthe complete opposite direction
for where it is there's nobalance anymore, this whole
notion of I don't need a man, Ican do everything by myself.
We are not create.
Women are created to doeverything by ourselves.

Speaker 1 (07:27):
Neither men or women.
Neither men or women, we're not.

Speaker 2 (07:31):
we're not.
We are created to be incommunity.
We are created to be couples,we are created for companionship
, all of these things.
And let's be real, we can'tco-crecreate, we can't reproduce
without one or the other, andthey certainly.

Speaker 1 (07:47):
They certainly are trying to push that movement
that we can and I'm like it'sit's no, not no the sperm and
the egg still need to cometogether.

Speaker 2 (07:57):
It doesn't work if you know you can't you
physically, it's physicallyimpossible.
So if you tell me that, I'mgoing to tell you you're smoking
a joint that I don't wanthonestly right, because I think
women, we for us to be soft, tosurrender, we need the masculine
because, again, if we're doingall of the things, we are not in

(08:20):
our feminine, we're in ourmasculine and that takes away
our superpower, that takes awaythe essence of who we are as
women.
I'm not saying I'm not handyand I can't do things.
Absolutely Do I want to.
Absolutely not.
I don't want to be shovelingthe snow all the time.
I don't want to be taking outthe trash.
I don't want to do those things.

(08:41):
I want to be nurturing, I wantto be soft, I want to surrender,
I want to be in that magneticenergy that brings women in and
people in, not this whole.
I can buy my own flowers.
That song drives me bonkers.
Get it that.
Hey, yeah, you were cheated onand I get yeah, we all can buy

(09:03):
our own own flowers.
It's not that we cannot beindependent women absolutely,
and it is actually attractive ifwomen have their own thing
going on yes but hang your penisat the door when you walk
through that door.
Yes, because it's.
It is such a we are giving awayour power when we're not

(09:23):
leading into that.
So I think, yes, this movementof I can do it by myself, yes,
we're divorcing men only becausethe men that were raised
there's this, there's this senseof.
I think there's a generation Idon't know what it is where
mothers did not raise men, theyraised boys and they just

(09:46):
emasculated these men.
So we have all these boys thatare in men's bodies, expecting
the entitlement of.
I'm just going to work but I'mnot going to do anything to fill
the cup of my partner, andshe's going to do everything and
I'm going to sit on my ass andthat's what's happened.

(10:06):
So, yes, a lot of these womenare coming out of these
marriages, going I can't do thisanymore.
I'm drained, I'm getting sick,I'm carrying weight.
I've aged 10,000 years from thepoint of that and I'm not
fulfilled.
I haven't had an orgasm.
I haven't.
I don't know what desire feelslike I don't even know what I

(10:28):
want anymore.
So I think that's there's forwomen.
Women want to come home tofeeling that desire, feeling
taking care of, not necessarilyin the financial aspect of it,
but in the spiritual.
In the financial aspect of it,but in the spiritual, emotional

(10:49):
framework of what it is to be awoman, because we are supposed
to be soft, so we can supportour partner in their evolution
through our spiritual gifts.
Because women are creators Ifyou give us a house, we create a
home.
If you give us sperm, we createa baby.

Speaker 1 (11:05):
We are meant to.
We, we are the creation.
Yeah, we are the Velcro.
We are the Velcro of theuniverse.
We are the we are the creationaspect of all.
What I love, too, is you weretalking about bringing it back
to balance.
You know I'm and I don't wantto strip any independence away
from anybody.
You, you want to go beindependent.

(11:26):
You want to know what thatfeels like.
You want to do that.
I invite every woman who feelsshe needs to do that.
Go do it and then come back tome when you're exhausted, tired,
your adrenals are shot.
Yep, you've lost your own senseof femininity because you
haven't balanced it.
So it is.
It's about coming back.

(11:46):
It's.
It's about coming back tocenter and balancing it and,
like you said, yes, hang yourpenis at the door.
You know it, it's, and it'sfunny cause I can hear people
are going to get like all aboutthat, but it's, it's.

Speaker 2 (11:59):
It is cause there's a lot of angry women in the world
it's it's.

Speaker 1 (12:01):
it is because there's a lot of angry women in the
world.

Speaker 2 (12:05):
There's a lot of angry women.

Speaker 1 (12:07):
Oh, this is what I was going to say.
They absolutely, because youalso said this earlier you, you,
you diminish and lose yourpower when you were stuck in
that masculine and that isexactly what that dark or elite
system wants.
What that dark or elite systemwants.

(12:28):
Hence the movement, because webecome less powerful
energetically and spirituallywhen we are focused solely in
the masculine.
You literally diminish.
And when I say that, I just seeovaries like shrivel right,
like they dry up and shrivel andit's like you're drying the
seeds of the tree and over timethat erodes a culture, it erodes

(12:50):
a society, it erodes the family, it erodes every living,
breathing aspect and function ofthis planet.
When that energetic, feminineenergy, the source, your tanks
are dry period, your tanks.

Speaker 2 (13:07):
They're dry, your tanks are dry and it also stops
you as a woman.
If your tank is dry down there,if you've cut off your
connection to source throughyour womb energy, you're cutting
off your source to money, andthat's what women don't get you

(13:27):
want.
Sure, you can have all the toysin the world, but there is
something to be said abouthaving an orgasm through an
intimate connection with a humanbeing, yes, and so, yeah, no, I
hate to interrupt, but thisjust popped in my mind.

Speaker 1 (13:42):
Okay, this just popped in my mind.
So you know so many women,especially in my age bracket I
can't remember how old you are,but in my age bracket you get
into that paramenopausal,premenopause and all
post-menopause, and there's thiswhole thing about the vagina
drying up.
Sex hurts Sex.
Okay, so I don't experience anyof that.
I don't experience any of thatat all.

(14:04):
Okay, now, yes, I'm doinghormone therapy, but I, I I also
practice trying to balance thatfeminine masculine thing.
So, as you were talking, I justdawned on me I was like, oh my
God.
So any of my friends are thewomen that I know that are
struggling with this dry vaginasyndrome, which is incredibly

(14:27):
Vagina syndrome, which isincredibly.
It's incredibly painful, right,but when we look at it from the
perspective of an energeticpossibility, I'm curious if
those women are operating deeplyfrom a masculine state and how
present are they to that truefeminine balance within their

(14:47):
life?
Are they cultivating ornurturing that balance or are
they literally holding all themasculine?
Now, I haven't asked enoughwomen, but I would be so curious
to do a study like that.
Just go ask those women, likethose women who are dealing with
and in their OBGYN's office andgetting those treatments, to
help with that.
I want to know what yourday-to-day life looks like.

(15:08):
And I wonder and I bet you, Ibet you they're all so stuck in
their masculine, eitherforcefully stuck there because
that's the role they play intheir families and that's how
their husband treats them, orthey choose it because they've
bought and sold into thatparadigm.
That's wild that that just cameup while you said that.

Speaker 2 (15:30):
So anyway, yeah, I think there is that piece, but I
also think it's because we werenever taught to be women.
No, we were never taught to bewomen.
We were taught how to havechildren, how to run a household
, we were taught to cook clean,all these things that are
innately, I guess, within us aswomen.
But we were never taught.
We weren't taught about desiresin the bedroom.

(15:53):
We weren't taught about, hey,what makes you feel sexy and
sensual and confident andmagnificent?
Nothing, we were taught.
Yes, make sure you dressappropriately when you walk out
of the house, but there isnothing about how to be a woman,
like how to truly surrender tobeing a woman.

Speaker 1 (16:12):
And it's also like I see there's a lot of like men's
groups, right, like men, go bemen out in the jungle or
wherever, but we don't reallysupport that for women.
We don't really say but wedon't really support that for
women.
We don't really say hey, ladies, you need to go out into the
trees and put on something lightand flowy and sing and frolic
and play with each other's hairand put braids and flowers, like

(16:35):
being in that energy.
And I'm not saying that doesn'thappen.
There are many spiritual groupsand communities that create
that, but it is not created in aWestern culture per se.
It is not even in our religiousculture.
Now, I shouldn't say thatbecause I know there's a lot of
religious cultures where theyhave women's groups and men's
groups in the whole nine yards,but it's not the norm.

(16:56):
It's not the norm Because ifyou foster that creation energy,
it just doesn't align with thatelite system at all.
You know which?
I feel that is where we arecoming back to, or we're coming
back to home, and I feel like wecan go on and on.
But I really want to talk aboutyour story and I want to.
I want to ask some questionsand share um, because it's I've

(17:20):
had.
I've gotten to witness yourbeautiful transformation over
the years.
And so a little bit about herbackground, y'all.
She when her and I met on onthe community like we would do
weekend events and thingstogether, but what I eventually
started learning is that she wasnot in the best marriage.
Her marriage was rocky, it wasstruggling, and what was

(17:43):
interesting is her and I wereboth in a weekend event and I
think that was the same weekendthat I was talking about my
situation with my now exboyfriend at the time and Tracy
was doing a lot of work.
You were talking about all thestuff happening in your marriage
and literally and I'll sharethis, I know we talked about it

(18:03):
earlier but what I saw is likeyou were literally shackled,
like no freedom, no, there there, like you could not breathe.
And after that weekend I feellike it was shortly after that
event he passed away.
Yeah, he passed away literallylike within the week.

(18:25):
And then I shouldn't say namesmy ex and I we broke up
literally within the weeks.
It was like it was.
It was insane, and I do feel itwas definitely more inside of
this energetic evolution thatwe've all been walking through
over the last few years.
But what I got to see is, rightafter that, you like blossom

(18:49):
beyond repair.
Everything about you changedthe way you wore your hair,
changed the way you dressed,changed the way you showed up.
The real Madura came out Liketell us about that story,
because that was wild, and I'msure that there are people
listening that are maybe movingthrough something similar, not

(19:09):
saying that their partners aregoing to pass.
That was something that wasvery strange and like just I
don't want to say coincidental,but it yeah.
I'll let you talk about it.

Speaker 2 (19:18):
Yeah, it's all good.
Um, so definitely like in EastIndian culture, divorce
separation is still very taboo.
It's this you say yes, you getmarried and you're in it for the
long haul, doesn't matter howshitty it is, doesn't matter if
you are dying inside, if he'snot beating you, and even then

(19:40):
if he's beating you.
So many women struggle withthis.
So many women stay in abusivemarriages and the emotional
abuse and mental strain and inour in my case, it became the
case of becoming a caregiver andmy late husband had muscular
dystrophy and unfortunately, hemade choices in his life that

(20:02):
the journey was his passing atthe very young age of 41.
He barely hit 41.
He turned 41, december 15th andJanuary 4th they had found him
dead.
So, but I had, I was yeah, I wastotally shackled.
I could not and I had seen thesigns, like something kept

(20:23):
telling me I'm just, I'm nothere, like this is not where I'm
meant to be.
This marriage is draining mylife force, energy out of me,
because I was pouring into thisother human in my life, as also
as a mom of a young child, and Iwas going back to school to get

(20:43):
my certification as a, as acoach, an executive coach, and
so all of these different thingswere lining up and I wanted a
second child.
So I planned that to the teambecause I was like I know when
I'm ovulating.
I'm going to have this child sothat my boys have, or my
children will have, a sibling.
I wanted I'm an only child, soI wanted to make sure that my

(21:04):
children will have a sibling.
I wanted I'm an only child, soI wanted to make sure that my
children I at least have two andso they would have each other.
And yeah, it was just.
It was as if this big elephantcame off of me.
So I asked for a separation inFebruary of 2021 and he was

(21:27):
still in the house.
We had become roommates for along time.
Like, he moved out of thebedroom the day my eldest was
born because he said I need toget rest.
So I think that was thebeginning of the end in many
ways, because we didn't share sothe intimacy factor.
I had shut off my feminineenergy.
I had.
I remember telling girlfriendif I never have sex again, well,

(21:49):
that's fine, it is what it is,because I was so trained and I
was so blocked and.
I just had nothing in me.
No libido, no, nothing.
And I chalked it up tobreastfeeding and children and
all of all of that.
But it was so much more thanthat.
It was just I was.
My adrenals had failed.

(22:11):
I was in constant survival mode, because you're again when
you're taking care of someonewho is sick.
I guess he went to work and allthat, but I was still doing
everything else, whether it wasshoveling the snow, taking out
the garbage, the kids, the dogs,all of us.
It was my responsibility andthat that was that right and

(22:33):
yeah and so I think in thatprocess Tracy came into my realm
of.
Okay, I need, I don't know howit came about.
I can't remember exactly how Iwas introduced to Tracy, and
then I think that's when we gotintroduced Tara, but yeah, so I
just had switched off.

Speaker 1 (22:53):
So you'd mentioned, february 21st was when you guys,
when you made the separation 21yeah and then stayed.

Speaker 2 (23:01):
He stayed in the house and I think I just made
sure that I was never around,Like I made sure I was busy.
I focused on my business.
I was just like I'm done.
I'm done, I need to focus on me, I need to focus on the boys.
Because I said to him in thatmoment I said I have to raise
these children.
I cannot be raising you two.
I felt like I had threechildren.

Speaker 1 (23:22):
And I know a lot of women struggle with that.

Speaker 2 (23:28):
Yes, how quickly after that did he pass.
So then he moved out January2022 and by Feb 20 or sorry,
january 2022, or Feb sorry, feb2022, he moved out.
Feb 2022 he moved out and byjanuary 2023 he passed, so 11

(23:52):
months to the day.
Pretty much was so wild.
He passed, yeah, he passed away, and um, and I know we were
talking about the dream that Ihad, so yeah, during this whole
separation, the dream duringthis whole separation period and
you know they say dreams havedifferent connotations to it.
So I had this dream that I wasspeaking at his funeral and I'm
thinking, okay, maybe this isthe death of the marriage

(24:12):
because our marriage was comingto an end.
So, and I had written it out inmy journal to the point of like
, where I saw my kids sittingwhere I was sitting, everything,
the picture on the screen, allthe stuff right and uh, and I
remember looking back at itafter he passed and I was like

(24:34):
what in the heck it was to the t, like it was to the t, and I
think it was a couple years orit was a year after I asked for
the separation, so just beforehe moved out, and he hadn't
moved out yet.
So I was like the dream wasthat it would.
It started that his father wasby his bedside and then I was

(24:54):
speaking at his funeral.
I'm like how is that possible?
Because he's still in the houseand it looked like a different
house, all together in adifferent room.

Speaker 1 (25:02):
So it was a very deep premonition, premonition that
came up knowing yes.

Speaker 2 (25:10):
And it was wild and I remember telling, telling my
mom after he was in the hospitaland like he's not coming out of
this room, and she's like no,it'll be fine, it'll be fine,
like it's not, like this is thebeginning of the end.
I didn't know how much longerlike he came out of the hospital
and then, I think, within amonth, he, he, finally passed.

Speaker 1 (25:31):
Where do you think the root of that knowing comes
from, Like when you sit withthat in your body where do you
think that comes from?
I think profound.

Speaker 2 (25:39):
I've always had that.
No, something has always toldme I think it's just come a long
way, as my spiritual gifts havegrown and I've connected to God
in a different way, but I thinkGod has always protected me.
God has always protected me,given me downloads in the sense
of, hey, you need to prep this,or somebody will come in and

(26:01):
tell me, hey, you need to getthis, hey, you need to get this
done, or you need to get thisdone, or whatever it might be,
and so I think it's just a giftI've been given.
Sometimes it's scary becauseI'm like I shouldn't know this,
this, this like so I never saidit to anybody because I'm like,
no, this is well.

(26:21):
I didn't say it out to thefamily.

Speaker 1 (26:23):
I said it to some friends.
I'm like I had this weird dream.

Speaker 2 (26:25):
I'm like, well, it could be nothing, it's maybe
just the marriage collapsing andthat's the thing.
But I've always yeah, for aslong as I can remember, I've
always had those dreams.
So I think it's just somethingthat that's one of your gifts.
Gifts no-transcript.

(27:10):
Because I was like I don't evenknow what an orgasm feels like
anymore, Like I had no clue whatthat felt like.
I didn't know where I was goingto be going, what was gonna
look like for my business.
And I remember when I asked forthe separation is when I
chopped my hair and I chopped itshort and I went purple but

(27:33):
purple highlights in my hair andit was kind of this freedom and
he and I did it because hehated short hair, hated short
hair.
He was like like never gonnacut your hair short.
And when I asked for theseparation I was like screw you,
I'm cutting it, I'm chopping itand all of that energy they say

(27:53):
with all that energy leaveswhen you've chopped your hair,
it leaves with whateverstagnation and what you're
cutting off from the past.
So I chopped it off, went intopurple, which was a lot of fun.
It was fun, it was funky, itgave me a different vibe and it
was something that I that washer kind of that Phoenix rising

(28:18):
type of energy of okay, let'sstep out into the world in a
different, different way, in adifferent way, and I had done a
photo shoot at a full, fullthing, which was really neat.
It was a really neat experienceto go through and be myself,
and that's when I had startedtalking on stages more and more

(28:39):
about the, the power of thepussy, and not in in the way of
that word, how it's shown up insociety, but really as women.
That's where our creativesource, that's where we we have
to tune into her or her to guideus, because she is our guide,

(29:00):
of course.
Yes, I remember so many womenbeing like oh my God, but so
many women are blocked.
Oh my God, but so many womenare blocked off because of
religious, religious ties, ties,mindset, all of the things, all
of it.

Speaker 1 (29:17):
I mean I look back and I love what you say, power
of the pussy.
And I look back.
You know in a little bit, and Ithink you know a little bit
about my background, withdancing for a number of years as
a young person, you know, andall of that stemmed from the
physical and sexual abuse as achild, having zero self-worth
but also believing in my mindthat the only way to find love

(29:39):
in my life was through sex.

Speaker 2 (29:41):
Yep.

Speaker 1 (29:42):
And that is a big program that we have in this
culture and in this country.
And I've had to totally chopthat one down.
And only now, you know, walkinginto year 55 soon, not yet, but
only recently, in the lastthree years, two years, have I
really really started to perfectand hone and own the sacredness

(30:07):
of the pussy.

Speaker 2 (30:10):
I'll say those words.

Speaker 1 (30:11):
The sacredness of my sexuality and what I have to
bring and how deep and raw andpure and amazing that can be.
And I saw how I had used it asstrategy, either to stay safe or
to try to be loved, and it tookme years to really break free

(30:33):
of that.
And then here I am, a dancer inmy 20s.
And what are you doing?
I mean the power of that.
You're utilizing it to makemoney, to pull money out of
other people's pockets to put inyour own and you become wildly
masterful at the strategy of asexual seduction.
And my first, my one of myfirst coaching businesses where

(30:54):
I worked with women throughworking with women on body image
and and really honing their,their sexuality, their sexuality
and their femininity but it wascalled Simply Seductress, and
so that went on for a few yearsand then I was like that that is
the wrong name, that's notright, because it's not about
being a seductress.

(31:14):
But I could see where that wastied to and where that came from
, because there was this part ofme as a young girl that really
believed if I become this, thenI will attract that person I
want.
Where, today and now being ononline dating, and God, that's a
whole nother conversation wecould talk about.
Everybody wants to throw outtheir sexuality right away to

(31:37):
try and hook you.
And I'm like, bring me afucking brain, please, and bring
me some fucking interestingconversation.
And like, like, really light myfucking fire, okay, not with
your dick and not with your dickpics.
And no, I'm not going to sendyou pictures of me.
For fuck's sake, I'm not doingit.
You know, like all the timesend me a picture.

(31:58):
It's like fuck, really Like doyou have a brain or a mind?
Like that's what's interesting.
But it was, it was me having tolearn.
But recently I was talking tosomebody.
It was so funny and he wasn'tasking me out.
Okay, he was wanting to do alot of chatting and a lot of
video chatting.
But I'm like, when is dudegoing to ask me out?
And in a moment I saw myself goto I'm going to become the

(32:23):
seductress to get him to ask meout, and it was so subtle that I
missed when I made the switch.
And then what's interesting,what I love about this story is
he got scared and then he likeshut the whole thing down
altogether, like oh, I was atthe wrong time and all this
bullshit and I'm like what?

(32:44):
But then I was like, oh my God,I totally fell into my own
strategy.
He picked up on that too,because he doesn't want that
either.
Like we're both dealing withour shit right now and so, and
so you know, and I and I let itgo.
But I was able to see when Idid it in the switch that I made

(33:05):
and catch that for myself LikeTara, you don't want to do that,
like I don't want to do that.
And it isn't that I don't wantto do it, or it isn't that I
don't want to give it.
I absolutely would love to giveit up to the right person, but
it's not the way in which I wantto use that power.
100%.

Speaker 2 (33:23):
And that power, 100%, and that's power that we have.
We have, and that's, I think,what women forget is people have
gone to war because for us, yes, wars have been created because
of women, yes, and we hold thismonumental, magnificent power
within us.
And seduction is an art and itshouldn't, it's a very there's a

(33:51):
fine line between using it forthe good and for the bad.
So when you say that art ofseduction and like that magnetic
energy, it's not a bad thingand it can be used really
beautifully in a very beautifulsense, and I think women need to
learn the art of seduction,because we don't even know that
part anymore.

Speaker 1 (34:12):
We don't know how to seduce people not in a, but I'm
going to say it's seducing self.
It's seducing self because theart of seduction it is.
We'll kind of shift gears here.
It's amazing.
Like I, I, I, you know, it'sfunny when I used to dance on
stage and people would say, youknow, the clients would be like

(34:34):
you, look possessed up therebecause I'm so in tune with
music and my and music, justlike it goes right up that that
vessel, it goes into thatfeminine core of me and it
explodes through my whole entirebody and I move with that and

(34:54):
and that.
That's always what I've wantedwomen to experience.
You find that for yourself,that's sacred and that's yours
and then you can give it whenyou choose someone's worthy of
receiving, because that's yourenergy, that's yours and you

(35:15):
don't have to use it to get thisthing.
Like you know my mom'sgeneration, like you got to find
a man.
You got to find a man to takecare of you.
You just got to do the thingsbecause you got you know, like
gone are those days, like it'snot about the man taking care of
me, but it is about it's aboutthis this coming together of the
man brings his power, hispresence, his provide, his

(35:37):
sacred protection and I bringthat sacred nurture, that sacred
feminine, that sacred seduction.
It's like when I don't know ifit's sounding right, but when
you lock that together it's awhole different energy than I
need to find a man or I need tofind a woman, like this thing

(35:58):
that we all run around trying todo.

Speaker 2 (36:00):
And yeah, we're chasing the outside instead of
chasing the inside.
We're chasing outside of usinstead of seducing ourselves,
to loving ourselves, to enjoyingwho we are, at our core and the
essence of our being.

Speaker 1 (36:19):
And I think most women don't even know the
essence.

Speaker 2 (36:20):
Oh God, they don't have a clue, they don't even
know the sweetness or the fruitof who they are?

Speaker 1 (36:26):
Nope.
They don't and so afraid tofind it, so afraid to find it,
so afraid to feel it and soafraid to even talk about it.

Speaker 2 (36:35):
Because there's shame around it.
So a lot of women there's shamearound enjoying sex, there's
shame around physical abuse inat childhood, like there's so
much shame and I'm I'm like youin the sense of I tried to
control my.
I thought, okay, that's theonly way to find love based on
my, the sexual abuse I had whenI was a child, and it's this.

(36:59):
And so when you're older andyou're like, oh, yeah, and then
it's the promiscuity and there'sjust there's so many different
pieces of the puzzle that comeinto play and it's like, okay,
well, I get to control thenarrative of this, so I get to
control the man instead of theman controlling me.
Right, and you lose yourself inthat sense because you're not.

(37:25):
It's not coming from a place ofcontrol of self, it's coming
from a place of but if I controlit, then they can't hurt me of
controlling another, another.
And so it's very interestingwhen it comes into the play of
that feminine and women beingscared Because, again, their

(37:46):
mothers you've always been toldbe seen and not heard.
Your desires don't matter, yourpleasures, the only reason you
have sex is to procreate.
The only reason it's alwaysabout your husband's pleasure,
um, or your partner's pleasure.
It's not about you, you don'tmatter.
But let's be real, we didn'tmatter why.

(38:06):
Why do we have one?
Why do we have a clitoris Like?
But we have the one?
If we look at the penis and welook at the clitoris, the only
job of the clitoris is pleasure.
The penis is a multi-tool, sowhy?

Speaker 1 (38:27):
that's never looked at it like that.

Speaker 2 (38:30):
I'm like okay, it's a multi-tool and that's why, if
you look at cultures differentcultures I know it happens a lot
in Africa is they actuallycircumcise women.
They cut off the clitoris sothat women can't feel pleasure,
and it's that they're cuttingoff from what they're meant to

(38:53):
experience in life, which blowsmy mind, and they're still doing
it to today.
Yeah, it blows my mind.

Speaker 1 (39:02):
It's amazing the different traditions we have
throughout the world, all in thename of God, whatever.

Speaker 2 (39:11):
And I don't even, I don't quite I have to do more
research into why they still dothat tradition of technically
castration.

Speaker 1 (39:23):
I would guess Well, I feel like, why do we still do
it here in the States?
I mean, I, my ex-husband and Ihad a big fight over whether or
not we were going to circumcisemy son and he won, and my son
got circumcised and I was pissedand and because I see it as
some form of mutilation and Isee it as a man who's
uncircumcised gets more pleasure, has more sensitivity and you

(39:44):
know like he should have thatright and why are we what are we
?
what are we cutting off?
Why?
And it's religious, it'sreligious, it's religious, yeah,
and it's.
You know, my mom and I had aconversation oh, but it'll be
cleaner and he won't getbacteria.
I'm like, I'm like, okay,that's the dumbest story I've
ever heard, because women, girls, little girls, have a hot,

(40:04):
moist pocket.
Okay, that all kinds of thingscan get in there, and nobody's
telling them, yeah, no, nobody'stelling us, like we're going to
get infections, like it's sucha.
It's the insanity of the thingsthat we have programmed people
to believe.
And it's like leave the bodyalone.
It's a beautiful thing and itwas.
It was meant and designed to beexactly as it is.

(40:24):
You don't need to touch it Now.
Granted, if you want to gochange your body later as an
adult, you want to fix, clip,snip, dip, whatever, but when
you are born that way, justleave it.

Speaker 2 (40:35):
Just leave it.
Yeah, I agree, like my boys, myboys are not circumcised.
And then my eldest kept gettinginfections and he wasn't able
to pull the skin back and I saidto him I said, look, you need
to put this cream on, because ifyou don't, we will have to,

(40:56):
because again it's going tocause problems of growth.
So in those circumstances I getit.
But, yeah, me and my latehusband had that same.
We argued about that.
It's like, oh, I wish I had.
And I said you made a choicewith me.
We agreed not to.
And now you're coming back atme with this.

(41:17):
Yeah, if you want it and cause,I told him.
I said you wanted to do it.
You could have taken him.
Yeah, you could have come withme and taken him and I would
have done, but I'm not.

Speaker 1 (41:26):
I wasn't going to go by myself.
Yeah, yeah, they did it with myson.
They did it 14 days after birthon a table with a local, and I
watched them mutilate my childwhile he laid there screaming.
I'm crying and my ex-husband isfeeling like shit, only to find
out later that his brotherbecause for him it was a

(41:47):
religious thing and then he wentand asked his brother and his
brother was like we didn't dothat, and then he felt bad and I
and I kept trying to find allthe evidence.
And I'm not saying thatsomebody is not going to get an
infection, right.
It's.
It's, it's possible.

Speaker 2 (41:59):
Little girls get infections, we get infections,
but it's like it's just you kindof have to hit or miss it and
then later on they put themunder full general anesthetic
and then they have to do it.
If they have to do it, yes, butthat's as a parent teaching
them to be like, okay, you'vegot to pull it back and clean,
and yes.
And so I think it's just yeah,it's all these things that we do

(42:22):
in society based on religionand all this stuff.
But I think, as women, we havejust been told that we're not
supposed to do all the thingwe're not supposed to feel.
We're not supposed to dressprovocative, whatever it is,
because some women feel sexy insweatpants and a hoodie.
Yes, some women feel sexy in adress.
It doesn't matter what you wear, it is, it's a it's a inside,

(42:48):
it's a it's a inside job, insidejob.
It's how you feel inside job andwe, and so that's that's how
that evolution came.
And as time went on, and yeah,she evolved and then now she's
who I am today, which Iabsolutely.
I love who I am today and it'sit's about an embodiment.
That's, I think, what came outof everything.

(43:09):
After I could breathe a bit,but yeah, it's, it's this whole
elephant.
When you go through thesescenarios in life and you, you
realize, okay, I don't I don'twant to live like this, like I
want to.
I want to embrace the life thatI have and I think women are so
scared to embrace that.
And there's I had I had aconversation with someone and

(43:31):
she's she's like, oh, I want tobe more intimate with my husband
.
I said, okay, is that comingfrom you or for him, from him?
And she said it's coming fromme.
I'm thinking, okay, what's,what's the hold up here?
And it was it's about.
I always believed it was aboutmy, it's only about my husband's
pleasure.
And I said, well, where do youthink that came from?

(43:52):
And it was it.
We kind of had to unpack that alittle bit, but that's that's
another thing that women was.
We kind of had to unpack that alittle bit, but that's that's
another thing that women have inthe back of their mind.
It's like it's all about him.
And I'm thinking you realizethat the more if he's turned on
by you and the more sex you havewith your husband, the more
intimate you're going, becauseyour body as women, the more we
have it, the more we want it.

Speaker 1 (44:15):
More than men I feel like.
Okay, and I'm going to prefacewhen it's good.

Speaker 2 (44:21):
Yes, no when it's bad when it's good.
When it's bad, you want toavoid it like a 10-foot pole.

Speaker 1 (44:27):
Yeah, because one of the things that I always would
talk about in the workshops thatI did with women it's about
allowing a man to get in tunewith you and have him listen to
your body and have him bepresent with your body.
But it's not even about beingpresent with your body, it's
being present with your essence.

(44:48):
But you first have tounderstand your essence.
You have to know who youressence is, what your essence is
.
To even call him in becausethat is what we're doing we're
calling him in and I feel likethat is when that seductive
piece comes in, but it isn'tfrom a place of manipulation,

(45:09):
it's from a place of love,because it's like, from a place
of like I am.
I am embodying the wholeness ofmyself, falling deeply in love
with me in this moment, to callyou into me and to call you up
into your strength and yourpower, to claim me, to possess

(45:30):
me in this moment, like that'swhat I'm like.
Fucking claim my shit, likeexactly, throw me over the
shoulder and take me to the cave.

Speaker 2 (45:37):
Just have your way with me.
But again, a woman, you'reright, women, don't?
They don't?
They don't have those timeswhere they're just sitting with
themselves and, I think,understanding who you are, who
you are, what turns you on?
Do you know what turns you on?
And it's not in the sense andand this comes with regards to

(45:59):
life as well as in the bedroomis that what turns you on in
life, like?
What activities are you doingday to day?
What is your business?
What is your job?
Does that turn you on?
Does that light you up?
Are you excited?
And it's not always going to be, because that's not life.
But if 80% of the time to 90% ofthe time you absolutely love

(46:20):
what you do and you're drawn tothat and you get lit up and it's
like this drug, an aphrodisiac,then you're on the right track.
If you're constantly contractedand you're on the right track
right if you're constantlycontracted and you're dealing
with it just because, oh, Igotta deal with it and that's

(46:41):
what it was like and you knowthis being in those marriages
where it's you feel constructedand shackled and just yes, then
sex becomes painful.
Well, it becomes a job.
It becomes a job, but your jobphysically becomes painful like
it, and it doesn't matter whattheir size is.

(47:01):
Your whole system shuts downshuts down.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
Yep and 100%, and your pussy's like ain't nope
it's.
It's even more than that.
It's like because I've been inthose relationships.
It is the.
Every cell in my body wants tovomit.

Speaker 2 (47:18):
And.

Speaker 1 (47:18):
I'm just doing what I know I have to do to survive
this moment.

Speaker 2 (47:22):
Yeah, it's the visceral experience.

Speaker 1 (47:25):
And if there are any, anyone, any one of you, man or
woman, in that positionlistening to this podcast,
please shoot me a note, please,and reach out to us, because
that is not a place you want tobe, and there's a lot to heal,
and there's a lot to clean upand there's a lot to sort
through and and I don't wishthat upon anybody, because that

(47:50):
is the ultimate form of just.
I don't know It-abuse, it'stotal abuse.
Yeah, it's absolute abuse.
It's like absolute abuse insome of the worst forms, in my
opinion, and and you know.
But I also look back and say,well, I've experienced that, I

(48:13):
now know what that is, I nowknow what I won't do, and I've
experienced it more than once.
You know I had to.
I had to peel it back in layersand and find it newly and
differently and then realize, ohshit, I'm here again.
You know, and you know when Iwant to go back, cause one of
the things is I was going to ask, you know, I do want to ask you
what is this?

(48:33):
What is one step a woman can doto start this journey?
But one of the things I used to,a few of the things I used to
have women do in the workshopsthat I did is there's a lot of
women who've never even lookedbetween their legs and don't
even know what their vaginalooks like.
So that was part of thehomework you're gonna go home,
you're gonna spread your legs,you're gonna sit in front of a
mirror and you're gonna look allin there and you're going to
know exactly what it looks likeand you're not going to say it's

(48:54):
ugly, it's beautiful and you'regoing to find out, is yours.
You know, large, small,whatever, like it's all
different shapes and sizes.
And then the other thing that Ilove doing, and I still do to
this day, is the being exercises.
I'd make people go out into theworld and into public.
I mean you go to the grocerystore and I want you to be with
everybody and say hello and justmake eye contact and say hi and

(49:17):
like, if they are making eyecontact, you make eye contact
and you just say hello and inthe amount of shifts that would
happen for women, just in thatexercise, like people are nice
out there.
It's like, yeah, they are.
Oh my God.
People were responding to meand people were just coming up
to me and talking to me.
I'm like, yes, because you'reamazing and you're beautiful,

(49:39):
you exist, you are, you're seen.
And then they are seen and, ohmy god, you made their day
because you just saw them andthey haven't been seen in a
while and and a smile goes sofar.

Speaker 2 (49:53):
A smile goes so far, a smile goes so far.
And to answer your questionabout the one step, I truly
believe, just like the mirrorwork, of looking at your vagina
it's standing naked after ashower or before a shower and
just looking at yourself head totoe and actually saying what

(50:16):
you appreciate about your body,like I love my eyes, I like my
smile, I love my stomach becauseit yes, there might be stretch
marks, but you know what?
I had two babies.
It has a baby in there.
I grew things in there.
As women, we are so afraid to beafraid to look and be

(50:39):
vulnerable in that sense.
And if you don't love whereyou're at, you'll never get to
where you want to go.
No, and it's not to say becausenone of us are perfect, we're
not perfect.
We're always growing andevolving and expanding and
contracting, depending on theseason that we're in.
Yeah, but it it comes down tolook in the mirror and truly

(51:03):
embrace the queen, the empress,the goddess that you are,
because you are, and it doesn'tmatter what shape or size you
are you can be the tiniest womanor the biggest woman, but there
are women out there that havethis confidence, and they are
not petite, no, you know whatGood on you?

Speaker 1 (51:24):
I don't either, girl.
I sometimes I'm like damn,she's wearing that and I, but I
can't I won't even wear that,you know.

Speaker 2 (51:32):
But again, it's that confidence and and yes, there's
other things to be said aroundall of that, like I know, um,
why can't I think of her name?
She is, her last name is Cameron, but she had actually hid
behind her weight for years andshe used it as this wall of
protection and I think a lot ofwomen, when we have that excess

(51:56):
weight it's.
It is a wall of protection,because if they see me like this
, they don't get to see who I am, and so it doesn't allow women
to be the size that they'remeant to be, whether that's a
bit bigger or smaller orwhatever that looks like.
And so we, we protect ourselvesand we make a choice and we
decide in that moment that, okay, I'm deciding to be this, I'm

(52:18):
deciding to be too thin, too big, whatever that is.
And it's not about body shaming, it's about a decision that you
make not to be your authentic,beautiful self Self.
Yeah, because you're hidingaway from the world, yes, so,
yeah, as you're, you're hidingaway from the world.

(52:40):
And, yeah, coming into front ofa mirror and touching, like
feeling what your body feelslike, yes, and and learning how
to have sex with yourself.

Speaker 1 (52:50):
What does an?

Speaker 2 (52:51):
orgasm.
Feel like for you.
Where are your points Ifsomeone were to kiss you?
Do you like it?
On your neck, do you like it?

Speaker 1 (52:58):
And it's an embodiment practice of receiving
, receiving period, period, that, that, that word and that thing
right there, that's really whatit all comes down to.
And when a woman can't receive,she can't be in her feminine
Cause.
Guess what feminine is?
It's about receiving.
That's the feminine.
It's receiving and, yes, likeit is giving, it is giving and

(53:24):
it's, but it's it's giving inthe space of creation.
But receiving it's like we haveto receive and that's being
feminine and we're so, we're soprone to not.
We're just just say no, justsay no, just say no.
Like if someone just says, hey,can I give you a pencil?
No, I got it.
Like, just let them get you thepencil.
When people say, hey, you needhelp with the groceries, a lot

(53:45):
of times I'll say no, but a lotof times lately, when I find
that I'm saying no a lot, I'mlike, oh shit, I'm too in my
masculine.
So then I'll start saying, yes,I'd love help.

Speaker 2 (53:53):
Yes, please help me, please, please carry the one bag
, or even just asking, askingfor help, or asking saying, hey,
you know what this is going onthis weekend.
Can I, can we meet on thisSaturday and like, put it up
there and stop expecting and Iknow a lot of women there's so
much out there, especially inthe dating world is around this

(54:16):
whole notion that he should knowhe needs to lead.
He can't leave without youtelling him what you need.
You can't read your mind.
It took me a little bit becauseI'm like I don't want to feel
needy, I don't want to comeacross as too strong, and I was
listening to this one guy hisname is Benny or something and I

(54:37):
really like what he saysbecause he's like, throw him the
keys If he takes it, great, butif he doesn't, then you know
where you stand.
But you need to tell him hey,this weekend I'm free,
especially for those single momsout there dating.
You need to tell the man hey,you know what?
I don't have my kids thisweekend, or I?

(54:58):
I look I'm busy for these days,but can we meet this day?
and if he can't, he can't, yes,but don't you gotta ask in order
to receive.

Speaker 1 (55:10):
You cannot just sit here and say kumbaya and expect
it to him to know what you'rethinking, to know what, what
works for you, to know what youwant, and it is totally unfair
if you are waiting and testinghim for that.
That is such fucking bullshitLike do not test your man or any

(55:30):
man Like and I yeah, I'm intests.
We do test.
I know we test.
I know that's like a thing thatwe do, but don't purposefully.
Well, I'm just going to waitand see what he does.
I'm going to wait and see if hecalls.
I'm going to wait and see whathe like.
No, just tell me, you know whatI'd really like for Valentine's
day?
You know what I'd really likefor my birthday?
Oh, by the way, my birthday'snext week.
I know you have a lot on yourplate, you know.

(55:53):
Like, whatever it is, I mean, II'm totally in the dating scene
these days and I was recentlytalking with somebody and
there's a little, a little.
He's a bad texter.
I'm just going to say it andand his bad texting tends to.
I shouldn't say it's bad, it'sjust it's bad.

(56:13):
It's it's bad Most, most people, when you text, you just
respond Okay, most, everybodydoes that.
He doesn't always respond.
And here's well, here's what Isaw.
Here's what I learned aboutmyself, because when we talk
about attachment style althoughI'm secure today, what I my my
opposite of that is anxious.
So I noticed when there wouldbe this gap in the texting it

(56:38):
would trigger the anxiety and Iwas like, oh, and then I started
.
I was talking to a friend.
I wonder how many hours goes bybefore it hits that I then
become anxious about something.
So I used it as an opportunityto learn about myself.
But I also knew that we hadn'teven met yet.
So I can't ask this guy for any.
I there's like I can't have anyexpectation.

(56:58):
But in him and I talked aboutthis, which was great, and I
told him, I said, if we ever gotinto a relationship, here's
what I know I would ask for.
Is that if you say, hey, we'regoing to talk on X night and you
can't talk on that night, justlet me know you can't talk on
that night night, don't call metwo days later and then tell me
oh, it's like, just tell me,because then I won't go to the

(57:20):
place of thinking all thethoughts I just thought and then
he's in trouble, I'm in trouble, but that's communication.
But I also know that it wasn'tsomething I could ask before I
met the guy.
No, no.
And if we get into arelationship because he still
has a little bit of that pattern, but we're not in a
relationship, we're stillgetting to know each other there

(57:41):
would come a time when I'd say,hey, could you do that for me?
Because it would really make.
This is how I feel.
This is the difference it couldmake for both of us.
It's like that's how you bringthose communication and
conversations forward.
It's like because there's goingto be things that he needs to
feel safe and there's thingsthat you or myself need to feel
safe.

(58:01):
Until we get to that place ofsecureness within our
relationship, that then it's.
It just doesn't matter, butit's, it's the beauty of
communication, and ladies don'tthink they know what to do or
what we're thinking.
It's just not fair.

Speaker 2 (58:17):
They don't and it isn't fair.
And it's this whole notion of,oh, a man should always lead,
but that's not the case.
Because, again, leading doesn'tmean you have to do everything,
and I think that comes in.
You're still in your femininewhen you say, hey, what's your

(58:39):
schedule like this weekend?
Um, for us to meet up.
That's not being needy, that'snot being oh, my god, I'm coming
over to, I'm coming on toostrong.
That's letting him know thatyou want to see him so that he
can then say, because, again,they also have their anxieties

(59:00):
that are they good enough foryou?
Do you like them that way?
They need that because theyalso have the baggage as women
we bring, because we've dealtwith the idiots and they've
dealt with the bitches.
It's the way it's straight.
And they've dealt with thebitches Like, yes, it's the way
it's straight.
They have and those anxietiescome up for them too.

(59:20):
And I think we don't, we don'tlean into that that knowledge
for for ourselves or for womenor for men, and dating scenarios
where we look at it, go, oh,there's the anxiety piece from
their side.
And it's like, okay, I'm goingto squash it by showing up for
them in this moment, so thatthey don't overanalyze, because

(59:45):
they do the same, like if we sayto them oh, I have something to
tell you.
They're going to thinkeverything under the sun.
Just like if they say, hey,something's come up and do you
have time for a call.
You're thinking the world isabout to end.
As a woman, because again wewant to feel chosen.

(01:00:07):
We want those desires to be met, so we're also anxious.
So until we get to that securespace where we know, okay, this
is it, we're locked in.
Yes, we both have to give eachother the keys.

Speaker 1 (01:00:21):
Give each other the keys, give each other grace and
space and allowance.
My favorite word these days isallowance.
Allow people, allow people tomake mistakes, allow people to
fall down and allow people to bevulnerable.
Allow, give people grace andallowance, because we are not

(01:00:43):
perfect and I do believe we'vecome to this place where we have
this high expectation of damnit.
You need to be this way oryou're out.
You know, and I think guysthink something.
Well, I shouldn't say all men,but there are men that think
that about women and there arewomen that think that about men.
I mean, there's guys that thinkthat I'm the one that's supposed

(01:01:04):
to be doing all the callingbecause Bumble has, you know,
bumble has made it that you knowit's my job now and I'm like,
dude, it's a two way street andI honestly want you to show a
little bit more interest to likeit's a two way thing.
You want to hang out with me?
Then like let's show up foreach other, but don't just wait
for me to do for it, and maybeit's the younger generation, not

(01:01:47):
necessarily the oldergeneration.

Speaker 2 (01:01:49):
I don't know if you've been married.
Rules are different becauseyou're older and you know what
the hell you want and it's likeno, I want to say good morning,
and then they'll say it.
It doesn't always have to bethe guy that messages you first.
I don't like.
If I'm thinking about, I'mgonna tell you, I'm thinking
about you.
I don't need to play that gamethat I'm gonna sit here and pout
and wait till he texts me first.
Why, like?

(01:02:11):
Why?
Why can't men also be chosen?
And yes, it's, it's goingagainst the whole feminine
movement of I don't need no mantype bullshit yeah, yeah, it's
like you're going to cuddle yourpillows for the rest of your
life.
Go for it.
I guarantee you ain't going tobe that great, like it's.

Speaker 1 (01:02:31):
Let them forward to the day.
Yeah Right, I want someone inmy bed?

Speaker 2 (01:02:35):
I do.
I want to wake up.
I want to wake up besidesomeone who means the world to
me and who I mean the world tome and who I mean the world to
them.
I desire that and I'm not goingto apologize for that If that
makes me live backwards and allthis stuff.
Yes, I am an independent woman.
I'm a feminine woman.
I teach feminine leadership,but doesn't mean I don't desire
to have companionship.

(01:02:57):
Yes, companionship andpartnership and laugh with and
move around with and do lifewith we're not supposed to do
life alone?

Speaker 1 (01:03:08):
No, because if you were, you'd be here alone.
I'm going to shift gears alittle bit, just because I know
we're let's see what is.
Oh yeah, we're running out oftime here, but I want to shift
some gears I want to talk aboutbecause we've got this new moon
energy coming in.
Well, forget the new moonenergy coming in.
Well, forget the new moonenergy coming in Like it's here.
I feel it.
I have had so much go down thisweek, but I want to read this

(01:03:31):
post from Rewilding for Women.
I'm sure some of you have heardof her.
She's out there on Instagram,but she had this post recently
about the Gemini new moon and itgoes like this it's not about
more crystals, rituals ormantras.
This Gemini new moon is askingfor your presence, for the part
of you that remembers how toburn with devotion, embody the

(01:03:53):
holy and rise again and again,each time more whole.
That's the work now, that's thegift, and I love that because I
really feel it embodies back towhat we're talking about is
it's like embodying the holywithin you and really going
inward.
So I would love to hear yourthoughts on that and just

(01:04:15):
talking about that as we wrap upthe call and you know, when
we're looking at this, you knowigniting the feminine within and
inside of this new moon, energywhich I would imagine many of
you are feeling.
I feel like I'm shedding a tonof stuff.
That is no longer serving me andI'm really having to step out

(01:04:35):
into the truly truth of who I amand trust in God and trust in
my knowing that all is well.
But but it's and it's not about.
It's not about who do I, who doI need to be for you, because
you're you're.
It's not about me being thepeople, pleaser.

(01:04:55):
Oh yeah, it's really about mebeing who I am, and you will
either appreciate it or not.
Period, yeah so I think yes,yeah, it's.

Speaker 2 (01:05:08):
It is about going within and I think the more that
I went within myself on thejourney that I've been on, the
more magnetic my energy became,because, again, people are drawn
to high frequency.
People are drawn to your joy,your vibration is different,
you're, happier you're, and sureyou'll have your days like

(01:05:31):
these new moons, that lasteclipse and that thing can be
gone a year oh, yeah, I think ayear.
Yeah, I, I'm, I'm, I'm excitedabout what's happened this year
and all the things, but I'm donewith this year too.

Speaker 1 (01:05:49):
Yeah, we're only halfway through.

Speaker 2 (01:05:50):
We're only halfway through and I feel like it's
gonna be a roller coaster forthe rest of the half.
Which, hey, I'm on it, I'mproud, I'm happy, but it's just
one of those things where I'mlike I want to chop someone's
head off, like I the patientlevel, but it is.
It's about going within andit's not about doing anything
specific.
It's not.
It's not about doing.

(01:06:10):
It's about looking withinyourself and asking what do you
create, what are you desiring toexperience?
And then, from that place ofalignment and intentionality,
then go out and ask so that youcan receive that full ask and
you shall receive, whether it'sasking God or asking the

(01:06:33):
universe, whatever you believein, but you have to first ask
and allow yourself to believethat you can receive it.
So, being in that vibration,allow yourself to believe that
you can receive it.
So being in that vibration.
So for me, it's, it's all it hasbeen.
Be me and the right people willbe attracted to me, and the
rest, they can all fucking fly akite?
I don't, and I think it camewhen I turned 40, when I turned

(01:06:58):
40 in December, there was thisenergy of I don't give a fuck,
like, I don't care if you agreewith me or don't, if I'm not
impacting your life, like, ifit's not something that's really
impacting your life, I don'tcare, I'm going to live my life.
Finally, for me, and if you aregoing to jump on this bandwagon

(01:07:23):
with me, great, if you're not,there's the door Adios, I don't
need to be anybody other thanmyself because, yes, that people
pleaser era of me is over.
And I think women especiallycome to that at 40.
Up until 40, they're treadingin that and trying to escape and

(01:07:46):
getting to that point, but 40hits and there's a light switch
that goes off where we finallycome in, and I know it gets
better even, and you couldattest to this as you get to 50.
It's even better.

Speaker 1 (01:07:58):
Well, I feel like to what you're saying.
You know, if people are feelingthat at their 40s, that means
we've really jumped a big jump,because it used to be that you
really felt that in your 50s.
And that goes to show theamount of work that all of us
have been doing as a community.
To have those of you feeling itearlier is important.

(01:08:19):
But I see that because I feeleven these 20 somethings and 30
somethings, they are more wideawake than we ever were myself
at that age and I attest that tothe work that we're doing as a
community and as a whole.
And when I say community, Imean globally and spiritually.
And you know, one of the thingsI wanted to add before we wrap

(01:08:42):
things up.
But I wanted to add is that youknow, I think some women will
think that they don't even knowwhat they want.
You know they have no.
It's like their days are sostacked where it's this, to this
, to this, to this, to this,that you're literally surviving
your day, especially if you havekids, for fuck's sake, to this,
to this, to this, that you'reliterally surviving your day,

(01:09:02):
especially if you have kids, forfuck's sake.
And if you're a single parent,even if you are a married parent
.
It's like 11 o'clock comesaround and you're like I'm still
have a million things to do,but I have to shut it down and I
don't even have a second tothink about.
What is it that I myself trulywant?

(01:09:23):
And that's when I say eitherlie on the floor in your bedroom
or go out in the backyard andlay under a tree or in the grass
and just sink yourself into thesurrender of that moment and
allow your body to tell you whatit?
needs, because we forget tosurrender, and surrender is

(01:09:46):
another key piece to femininity.
You must surrender, you mustlet go and let God and you.
And that's like when I lay onthe floor, that's when I know
I've fucking had it, because I'mlike, okay, the floor is just
going to ground me and pull meto my center, and that's when I
just shut everything down,because if I'm in this standing

(01:10:08):
mode, I mean I'm going, going,going, going, going, going,
going, going all the time, andsometimes I have to do that
where I just have to stop.
And what is it I really want?
I don't even know, I don't even.
I just want to cry.
You want to cry, Then cry cryout loud, let it fly.
Yeah, you want to rage, thenrage.

(01:10:29):
You know, somebody said youcan't rage.
To fucking go out and rage Justlike, lose your shit.
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:10:37):
Screaming, pillow screaming a car.
Yes, like I've told clients,sit in your car and just yell if
you need to get it out or takea pillow.
If you don't want to go intoyour car and scream into that
pillow, and let it go.

Speaker 1 (01:10:53):
I always say to ride a roller coaster.
If you can go someplace andride a roller coaster, that is
one of the best ways.
Or jump out of a plane.
I mean, maybe you can't affordthese things, but these are
things like I like people.
I'm just going to go to anamusement park, but sometimes I
will do things like that Go ridea roller coaster, because you
will get it out.
You know you'll get it out.

Speaker 2 (01:11:15):
Yeah, absolutely, and I think it is.
It is all about surrender andthat is a piece it's letting go
of control.
It is all about surrender andthat is a piece it's letting go
of control.
And when you let go of controland you let, let go and let god,
life actually starts happeningin a very magical way, and it
might not look like the way thatyou want it to look, and that,

(01:11:38):
I think, is a piece of thepuzzle that women need to
understand.
It's not going to look what youhave a plan, that whole, that
whole thing is.
You make a plan and God'slaughing at you because your
plan is never going to be asamazing as what God has for you.
Yes, and so it's it's it's.
Let go.
Yes, take action, take intent.

(01:11:58):
Don't just sit there and expectit all to happen.
Show up, be you, beauthentically yourself and allow
the people to fall in love withthe true essence of you,
because that those masks need tocome off, because, at the end
of the day, it's that whole umsomeone I think it was in
Notting Hill, actually she saidyou go to bed with she's lying

(01:12:20):
in bed with Hugh Grant, and itwas you go to bed with she's
lying in bed with Hugh Grant,and it was you go to bed with
this version of me and then youwake up with this version.
Why can't you go to bed with thesame version you wake up with?
Go to bed with that version,because that version is
beautiful as she is.

(01:12:41):
She doesn't need to wear masksanymore.
And I think we need to let goof those masks Because, yeah,
sure, we put on makeup, but atthe end of the day, you see
women who have so much makeupbecause they're hiding behind
that, and then they wake up inthe morning and it's like who
are you?
Like it's a different version.

(01:13:02):
Or they wake up and put makeupon before they see their partner
or their spouse or whatnot.
That always blows my mind I'mlike I do not have the time or
the patience or the energy toget up.
So I'm what.
I'm not good enough as as I am.

(01:13:23):
Yes.
It's wild, that's wild andthere's a lot of people that do
that it's here, like it's such asad scenario for me that a
woman like I think it was Napoli, ever after Napoli, it was
where she had to cause that'swhat her mom instilled in her,
so she would wake up, make sureshe looked like she was a

(01:13:47):
million bucks lying and thenpretend that that's how she woke
up.
I'm gonna wake up with messyhair.
I'm going to wake up lookinglike I look after I come home
from the gym, like that's how Iwake up.
Yeah, if you like it, great, ifyou don't, I don't care,
because this is what you getright.

Speaker 1 (01:14:05):
What you see is what you get.

Speaker 2 (01:14:07):
Yes, when I go out I'll put myself together.
But you can't keep hidingbehind the facade of who you
truly are not, becauseeventually, eventually that's
going to crack and you're gonnaget older, you're gonna age.
But why not age gracefully, inknowing that you were beautiful

(01:14:28):
as you are, you were a goddess.
You own it.
And if they can't handle it,but that's their problem.
And I'm not saying have thisbitch attitude that you block
everybody off, like there's thewhole notion of a man smiles at
a woman and automatically she'slike I have a boyfriend.
He didn't say it, he gave you asmile.

Speaker 1 (01:14:47):
He's like complimenting you.
He said you look beautiful hewants to have a conversation.
Is there an?

Speaker 2 (01:14:53):
ulterior motive?
Maybe, maybe, but maybe notMaybe.
He just wants to have aconversation, and so you have
the conversation and you go onyour way.
You don't have to entertainanything more than that.

Speaker 1 (01:15:06):
Yeah, it's funny, there's I don't know if you're
familiar with I can't rememberher name, but she does these
things called flow dreams summermixed traffic yeah, summer
mixed traffic.
And there's one that I listenedto every now and then, but it
talks about cause she's got allthese ones about self-love, but
there's one about I don'tremember how she says it, but

(01:15:26):
it's basically receive the lovethat people give, the way that
people give love.
So I practice it all the time.
If someone's just going to giveyou a smile and say hi, just
receive it.
Who cares what the ulteriormotive is?
And say, hi, just receive it.
Who cares what the ulteriormotive is?
Like they're just providinglove the way they know how, in

(01:15:47):
that moment and I take that onin my dating too, because you
meet- an array of people andyeah, and I and I typically used
to just be like, oh, cuttingthat person off or blocking that
person or this, that.
But now I just I receive thecompliment or I receive the love
.
The way they give it Doesn'tmean I'm going on a date with

(01:16:08):
them, but I also don't need tobe rude to them, and that's I
think that's something I wishthat we as the female collective
would stop.
Stop being rude and being meanand hurtful.

(01:16:32):
Yeah, because that continuesthe divide.
And remember the concept ofdivide and conquer.
Well, if people were to reallylook at that right now, we're
divided now by race, we'redivided by gender, we're divided
by fucking whatever the city,the state, the neighborhood of
the country, I mean and they'redividing sex in a multitude of

(01:16:52):
different ways and, and you know, they're dividing the feminine,
masculine, like, like.
Just remember, conquer anddivide, divide and conquer.
That's how they destroycommunity.
And how we rebuild community isbringing back the peace, the
kindness, the love, theacceptance, the allowance, the

(01:17:12):
grace, and just be kind to theworld.
Bring love for God's sake.
But that's my big push healinghearts.
I also want to heal people.

Speaker 2 (01:17:21):
Yeah, think I think we just.
And why, why is it so?

Speaker 1 (01:17:26):
it's that whole receiving, receive the
compliment if someone says ohyou're beautiful, thank you,
thank you, oh, I like your shoes, thank you, thank you you don't
have to, you don't have to belike, oh, I need to sleep with
this man, no, or you don't haveto think that he wants to sleep
with you.
He's just telling you he likesyou.

Speaker 2 (01:17:47):
He's like he may, he might want to dance if you're in
a club, but other than that youdon't have to do anything you
don't feel comfortable with.
Why is it that and it's this,this snobbish mentality that
some women have that you walkinto a bar and you're like
nobody can touch me yes, andthen nobody is going to touch

(01:18:09):
you and you're going to not bein relationships, you're not
going to do things because youhave this wall up and you're
craving love and connection.
But when you walk out into theworld, it's this massive bubble
that no one can enter becausenobody's worthy of that right.
And so there's this push andpull of but I, I desire this.

(01:18:29):
And there's all the men arejackasses and assholes and scum
and this that the other they'renot.
No, but they're not I'm notsaying there aren't a bunch of
frogs out there that you kind ofmight have to.
Definitely aren't, definitely.
But again, you also have tounderstand, okay.
Well, where are they comingfrom?
And I'm not, and that comesgrace.
Are they coming from a placewhere they've been hurt and they

(01:18:51):
haven't done the work?
If they haven't done the work,yes you 100, 100, but if they've
done their work.

Speaker 1 (01:18:58):
There are genuinely good humans out there, well, and
I want to say this too thereare some worthy who may not have
done their work, who want to dotheir work with you, and you
have to discern that because youmay be the person to help make
that difference with them, asthey will with you, and that is
also something I think it's.

(01:19:19):
I feel we all have to get offof our high horses and start
really seeing everybody as weare all equal, just trying to
survive.
We are all trying to do thevery best we can.
We all have trauma, we all haveshit, and I'm not saying you
got to put up with everybody'sshit.
But there are some peopleworthy of just feeling it out a
little bit more, just get asense of who they are, and and

(01:19:43):
then you get to decidepowerfully, choose.
But we can go on and on aboutthis topic and I was like it's
it's a good one, but I do so.
Madura, how can people find you?
Where can they?

Speaker 2 (01:19:55):
find you?
Yeah, you, you can find me onInstagram, linkedin, facebook,
tiktok, I believe.

Speaker 1 (01:20:05):
I'm on all the social media, so if you're looking at
me on Instagram.

Speaker 2 (01:20:07):
It's at the real Madura and I've got a lot of
yeah, a lot of how to be onthere and just me being, and
it's it it is about.
It's about coming back to self.
It's about coming back to whoyou, the essence of you, because
once you're the essence of you,that's the beauty of it.

(01:20:28):
And it might not look prettygetting there, yeah, there'll be
a lot of tears and if you'redoing your work, there's going
to be, yeah.
So that's where you can find me.

Speaker 1 (01:20:38):
Yes, well, I will make sure to put all of the
information down in the shownotes and then to all of those
that are listening.
I will be putting together aheart healing workshop.
I do not have the dates, butplease stay tuned because that
is coming up in the next episode.
I'll be putting moreinformation out there.
Out there about that and forthose of you listening, thank
you so much.

(01:20:58):
Just always great to have youand reach out to us.
If there's anything that wetalked about that was triggering
or inspiring or exciting andyou want more information or you
just want to have aconversation, please reach out.
Madhura, thank you so much forbeing with us today.
It's just always a pleasure andfun and maybe we could do it

(01:21:20):
again.
And then, please, when you werein Dallas.
Yes, you have to tell me yeah,cause we will make plans.
All right, we will stay tunedfor the next episode in a couple
of weeks.
See y'all soon.
Have a great day.
Thank you for coming on thishealing adventure today.
If you're starting to see howeverything is falling into place
for you, consider rating theshow and sharing it with one of

(01:21:42):
your friends.
Keep that spirit alive and joinme next week.
Same place, same time.
Have a great week.