Malachi Wrap-Up & Contradictions: Ezra’s Ghostwriter Gig, Divorce Drama, and God’s Eternal Grudge

📝 Episode Summary:

Five years, countless smitings, and one accidental Rickroll later, we’ve officially finished the Old Testament—and we’re sending Malachi off with a bang (and a Bon Jovi cameo). In this wrap-up special, the hosts dig into the so-called “minor prophet” who might not even be real—spoiler: Malachi probab...

Malachi 4: Frolicking Calves, Ashy Corpses, and the Old Testament’s Murdery Curtain Call”

📝 Episode Summary:

We did it—five years, countless smitings, and more divine mood swings than a soap opera marathon—and Malachi 4 finally drags the Old Testament across the finish line. The chapter itself? A tiny four-verse fireball where God promises the wicked will be torched into stubble while the righteous get to skip around l...

Malachi 3: Tithes, Threats, and That Petty Little “God’s Naughty List”

📝 Episode Summary:

We dive headfirst into Malachi 3—the Old Testament’s penultimate guilt trip—where God allegedly sends a “messenger,” talks about refiner’s fire, and then pivots straight into shaking down the peasants for tithes. Yes, the chapter that prosperity preachers love to tattoo on their wallets makes a cameo, and we drag it appropriate...

Malachi’s Divine Dung-Fest: When God Calls You a Poop Face and Means It

This week, we dive headfirst into Malachi Chapter 2, where God’s big message to the priests boils down to: You’re all unworthy, you give me crappy sacrifices, and also—poop face. No, really. The Almighty threatens to smear dung on their faces because apparently that’s the ancient Hebrew equivalent of “bless your heart.” From hypocritical Levite nost...

Moon Shit and Menstrual Calendars: How Judaism Synced Up with Space

📝 Episode Summary:

Strap in for a lunar-laced detour from our usual Bible bashing as we dive headfirst into ancient Israel’s moon obsession, and no, not in a sexy Wiccan way. This isn’t your typical “let’s stare at the stars” moment. We’re talking about how the Jewish calendar was built around the moon’s ass and how fire poles, moon seekers, and period-power...

Suck My Johnson (Act): How the IRS Just Gutted Church-State Separation (and Called It a ‘Family Discussion’)

📝 Episode Summary:

Buckle up, blasphemers—this week’s episode of Sacrilegious Discourse takes a red-hot poker to the Johnson Amendment, that dusty 1954 rule designed to keep churches from morphing into tax-free political machines. Spoiler alert: the IRS just whispered “go ahead” to pulpit endorsements—so long as it’s ...

Malachi, Messenger of Mayhem: When God Hates Esau and Slams Your Goat Sacrifices

📝 Episode Summary:

Welcome to the divine roast of Malachi Chapter 1, where God kicks things off by saying “I love you” and then immediately follows it up with a detailed description of how much he hates Esau. Romantic, right? In this snark-laced breakdown, your favorite atheist duo dives into the last book of the Hebrew Bible—Malachi (or as we l...

Zechariah’s Zombie Apocalypse, Divine Meltdowns, and a Bible Book Wrap-Up from Hell

📝 Episode Summary:

Hold onto your prophetic horses—this ain’t your grandma’s Bible study. In this irreverent breakdown of Zechariah Chapters 12–14, we hit peak theological absurdity: God turns Jerusalem into a drunken stumbling block, demands loyalty through magical fountains and plague-stricken horses, and ends with a bizarre image of people...

Zechariah's Contradictions: God Is Furious. Unless He Isn't.

📝 Episode Summary:

Buckle up, heretics—it's our last dance with Zechariah, and we’re sending him off with a contradictions episode so absurd, even God might need a flowchart. In this glorious finale, our snarky hosts debate whether Zechariah was Iddo's son or grandson (because apparently genealogy is as hard for the Lord as kindness). Then it's on to God’s rage iss...

Zechariah's Prophetic Fever Dream: Donkeys, Flying Scrolls, and the Jesus Retcon

📝 Episode Summary:

Hold onto your chariots, folks—this episode is a wild theological autopsy of Zechariah, where prophecy, PTSD, and political propaganda come together like a DIY apocalypse starter kit. The hosts finally wrap up the Book of Zechariah, dissecting its two-part structure (First Zechariah: dreams and dates, Second Zechariah: undated mes...

Godless Congregations & The Joy of Non-Stick Spirituality: Sunday Assembly Exposed

📝 Episode Summary:

What happens when you take out the hymns, prayers, and judgment—but keep the community, music, and awkward potlucks? You get Sunday Assembly, the non-religious, non-doctrinal, definitely-not-a-church that’s somehow more wholesome than your average church barbecue. In this very special episode, we dive into the rise of so...

Lot’s Wife, Onan’s Pullout Fail, and the Egyptian Baby Massacre

📝 Episode Summary:

Welcome to the blood-splattered kickoff of our new series, “God’s Top 10 Kill Streaks – Old Testament Edition,” where your favorite heathens dive headfirst into Yahweh’s most unhinged murder sprees. Starting at number 10, we salt-shame Lot’s wife who was turned into a sodium statue for the crime of looking back while her hometown gets nuk...

Zechariah’s Endgame: Plagues, Prophets, and WTF Apocalypse Fuel

📝 Episode Summary:

It’s the final chaotic cluster of Zechariah—chapters 12, 13, and 14—and oh boy, it’s less “holy scripture” and more “political manifesto meets acid trip.” Your favorite atheist duo dives into post-exilic fever dreams where Jerusalem gets divine superpowers, horses go blind, and God plays Mad Max with cups of judgment and supernatural rocks. Bo...

Zechariah’s End-Times Dumpster Fire: Rape, Rotting Flesh, and Holy Crockpots

📝 Episode Summary:

Brace yourselves, heathens, we’ve reached the flaming finale of Zechariah, and boy, does it go out with a bang (and some divine rot). In this final chapter, God makes sure Jerusalem is properly plundered, the women are raped (again—because Yahweh loves a war crime), and half the city gets dragged into exile before He bothers to lift a...

Zechariah’s Final Purge: Stabbings, False Prophets, and a Holy Bloodbath

📝 Episode Summary:

Welcome to the most stab-happy, prophet-purging, guilt-soaked chapter yet—Zechariah 13. This episode dives straight into the divine mayhem where God allegedly opens a “fountain of cleansing” but immediately follows it up with a kill order on prophets, false or otherwise. Because nothing says forgiveness like stabbing your own kid for ...

Christian Mysticism: Divine Woo-Woo, Essential Oils, and the God Within (™)

📝 Episode Summary:

What do you get when you mix Jesus, astrology, essential oils, and a sprinkle of yoga? Apparently—Christian Mysticism. In this episode, your favorite heretical hosts dive deep into the incense-scented chaos of Christian mysticism, where God isn’t just a guy in the sky, but a vibe, a presence, maybe even that tingly feeling during a gui...

Zechariah’s Cup of Chaos: Blind Horses, Crying Wives, and Pre-Jesus Nonsense

📝 Episode Summary:

In Zechariah Chapter 12, the prophetic fever dream continues—this time with Jerusalem turning into a “cup” that sends nations reeling (whatever the hell that means), God blinding horses for no reason, and clans sobbing harder than a Baptist at an exorcism. Our favorite heretical duo attempts to decode the madness, questioning whet...

Prophets, Priests & Greek Freakouts: Zechariah’s Hot Mess Express (Ch. 9–11)

📝 Episode Summary:

Buckle up, heretics, because this week’s Sacrilegious Discourse hits warp speed through Zechariah chapters 9 through 11, where God gets trigger-happy (again), Jesus allegedly shows up on a donkey (because… prophecy!), and the priests and prophets start pointing fingers like it’s a divine episode of Maury. Spoiler: everyone’s full ...