June 11, 2025 • 53 mins
Saron unpacks estranged parents, “Doormat Mom” discourse, and what love actually looks like. Then it’s Meghan & Harry media lies, ICE raids in LA, and how Glendale fought back. Plus a Bravo-fueled recap of The Valley and Summer House Reunion Pt. 2. Pop culture, reality TV, and sharp cultural analysis for women who’ve stopped explaining themselves.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
(00:12):
Hello and welcome to surround things, a podcast of for smart
bitches who like their TV trashyand their takes hot.
I am your host Serran Al Caba. How do you guys diddly do?
It has been quite a week. It's a scorcher out here, like
it's just been, it's been a shift in the vibe of the city,
(00:32):
like it's a pride. Something happened after
Memorial Day weekend. I've never really been a big
summer person. I have always considered myself
more of a emotional winter. Like I have SAD in the opposite
direction. But since I I started living
alone for I've really started enjoying the day, the sunshine.
(00:56):
That's that it's my body tellingme something because I swear to
God, I learn more. I've learned more about myself
in this year living by myself than I have in my entire fucking
life, certainly. And I've also allowed myself to
(01:17):
feel more in this past year thanI have for the span of my last
eight-year relationship. I have to say, what?
What was I doing this? Oh, yes.
So the city, it feels like it isjust it's alive.
It is. The people are running through
(01:39):
the streets. They're drunk, they're merry.
Oh my God, I saw so many. Oh, Pride was this past weekend
in DC and DC Pride is a sight tobehold, right?
It is a very progressive liberaltown, right?
I think 9394, perhaps even up to97% of us voted blue all the way
(02:05):
through in this past election, 2024, the devastation.
And so you can't imagine like people feel real comfortable
being themselves up in this pitch.
And I just, there are so many asses everywhere, so many men's
(02:26):
butt, so many butt cheeks, just little pale ice cream scoops
just glowing in the night. And I love it.
I as a woman, obviously I get a little anxiety when I see nude
people trouncing about because men are scary.
And then I realize these are men.
(02:47):
And then I remember. But men are also afraid of men.
Isn't insane This predicament they put us in?
There are protectors. They're the only ones that can
protect us from all the scary things out in the world.
When they're the scary things out in the world.
It's really such a fucking racket.
Such a wreck. Anyways, Speaking of racket,
(03:10):
Coco Goth. Provo darling, her opponent
didn't give her flowers. Of course.
Listen, I already went off aboutthat bitch, OK?
Let's just call her that bitch on my Instagram, my TikTok.
So if you want to hear me, I don't know, read her to filth.
(03:34):
Go forth please. You should be following me
freeware or routine. But the gist, I'm going to keep
my energy on the pod positive about Coco Goff.
Proud of you, Boo. Great work.
You're not one of my stories forthe day, for things that pop
because this isn't a sports podcast, but you are a queen.
(03:59):
You're a Quan, a Quan Quan, and I'm so proud of you.
All right, you keep just being your excellent, classy, graceful
queenie cell. My God, that bitch has more
grace in her little finger than I have in my entire body, OK?
(04:20):
She is just handled every jab from her losing opponent like a
fucking queen. And that is all I shall say
about that. Actually.
Let's rewind. Let's really just dive on in
first with main character things, A segment where I regale
(04:42):
you with stories of my week, my life, and you listen and tell me
that I'm perfect, flawless, gorgeous, and you love me.
OK, I don't want to talk about this too deeply, but it is
important to mention. My father is back in the
hospital. It's a thing where his heart is
(05:04):
causing issues in different areas of his body and he was all
aging parents. It's tough, it's not great.
But I saw this TikTok video thisweek of this woman who calls
herself the doormat mom. And she said something along the
lines of it's bullshit when children say that they don't owe
(05:28):
their parents anything. And I forget like, too
existential too quickly today. But to get very existential very
quickly, we've already had this conversation about what the
ethics are of bringing life intothis world without their
consent. And then what you can expect
from said life once they are thrust into this cold, hard
(05:50):
world. And where I landed is you can't
expect much. It's a crapshoot, right?
It deciding to have children is an insular thing, and it has
absolutely nothing to do with the specific life you brought
into the world. When you have a child, you have
a concept of what it feels like to be a parent and what it a
(06:12):
concept of what it's like to have a child and raise a child.
But you don't know that specificsoul.
You don't know whether that thatbeing will align with with how
you want them to turn out, whether that be in a better or
worse way by, I don't know, whomever standards.
(06:33):
So you, I think as a parent, just have to trust that you can
be a good custodian of this little soul and nurture them in
a way that will turn them into decent, kind, empathetic,
conscientious little people and hopefully adults.
(06:56):
And that you're able to nurture their gifts and whatever it is
that that their nature is and guide them onto a path of
decency. It's truly just like decency and
respect and hard work and kindness.
And so beyond that, your child could very much dislike the way
(07:24):
that you raised them and not align with what you had planned
for their future. And that doesn't make them a bad
kid. Beyond that, the details of what
fills in those gaps are up to that.
(07:46):
As long as they're bringing verylittle harm into this world and
doing their best to bring in as much good as possible, then what
else can? Does that matter?
You don't. You're not owed access to them.
You're not owed any support fromthem, financially, emotionally,
none of that. It's that you don't get any
(08:11):
other than the intrinsic value of being someone's parent.
And if that's not enough for you, then you shouldn't be
someone's parent. And of course, I am thinking
about this in the context of my relationship with my dad as he's
aging right now and he requires more care than he ever has in
(08:34):
his life. He's really never asked very
much of us at all. But now, even though it's scary
and it is there, there's no chaos, there's no confusion.
He knows exactly where his family is.
He knows his four daughters are circling around him, he knows
his wife is by his side, and he knows he will be cared for
fully, like fiercely, without question or hesitation.
(08:58):
And that's not because we owe him as his daughters, but
because he's earned that care over a lifetime of kindness, of
presence and stability, emotional safety.
He's made it easy to love him right?
So we do not to get much and that doesn't mean that things
(09:20):
were always perfect. Each of us had our conflicts
with him. Some of them were small, some of
them were very big and some of them fall out lasted quite some
time. But at the end of the day, we
always found our way back to each other.
But the through line, even in any conflict that we had, in
retrospect at least it his intentions were always good.
(09:45):
They were always for our good. Specifically, it was never about
his ego. It was about our survival.
It was about us being able to thrive, us being able to
compete, us being healthy and having a happiness and living a
good life in this country that he sacrificed so much to come to
for our sake. His adoration for us was
(10:07):
unmistakable. He's not a perfect man, of
course, but we always felt safe in the fact that he wanted to be
and was a good father. So you can imagine how high my
fucking blood pressure spiked when I came across the TikTok
from that woman, right? The doormat mom, she's crying on
(10:30):
camera about her estranged daughter.
And she like insists the children owe their parents for
raising that all right and caring and nurturing to your own
standards. That was our subjective.
And the child doesn't get a say.Obviously, it does not entitle
you to a relationship forever with your child meeting the bare
(10:53):
minimum standards to to allow this life that you brought into
the world for no reason other than you wanted them here.
OK, you keeping them alive is literally the bare minimum what
you could do. And when that concept of no one
(11:17):
asks to be born is brought up, this woman, the storm at mom,
she says it. That's just a way to shut down
the conversation and avoid resolution.
OK? No, no, your daughter does not
want resolution. And mind you, her daughter has
popped back up onto the scene after discovering her mom's
Internet presence where she has made herself this like victim of
(11:41):
her estranged daughter. I don't know how you could be a
victim of someone who is actively trying to escape you.
But alas, I think her daughter had enough.
And she piped up and said this is what the deal was.
But nobody was surprised obviously, because 90% of her
comments and her feedback on herpage are this is a you problem.
Obviously your daughter doesn't want to be around you.
(12:03):
You're a looney tune, OK? Any result?
She says that that's a way to shut down the conversation,
pointing out that nobody has to be born, therefore you can't owe
someone for doing something thatyou never asked for, right?
Your daughter wasn't, doesn't want resolution because she
doesn't want a relationship withyou.
And that's cruelty. That is what happens when
(12:25):
someone says I am no longer available to be harmed, to be
abused by you. And the part that pisses me off
the most, right, as if I'm not already pissed, is you don't
want resolution. You want access.
You want access to her. You want access to her kids.
You want access to her timeline,to the life she built in spite
(12:46):
of you. You want to leach proximity to
her, not to repair what you broke.
She likely dreams of fucking disappearing into the Swiss Alps
and becoming fucking fro line Gertrude before she would let
you near her children. OK, because here's being a
(13:07):
parent doesn't stop when your child grows up.
And sometimes the most loving thing that you can do as a
parent is leave your child the fuck low.
If you caused so much fucking damage that your child went no
contact and you still can't takeaccountability, you were never
(13:30):
parenting. You were performing possession.
You were issuing demands under the guise of sacrifice.
So when my sisters and I are in the hospital rearranging our
lives without a second thought because we want to be there for
(13:50):
a man who deserves to be loved this way, the way that he is
experiencing and the thought of him ever being confused or
wondering where we are, where his family went, It makes me
want to scream, throw up, cry, all of the things because
(14:11):
obviously would never leave him.Not out of obligation, but out
of devotion. So no Long story short, TLDR
parenting does not entitle you to anything, but being a good
one might invite something back.You're not entitled to it, but
(14:36):
if you are a good one, they willstill want you around.
They will go out of your their way to be good to you, to make
sure that you are comfortable, to make sure that you have
access to their grandchildren. I think maybe it's the fact that
I am seeing how much work it involves, even with multiple
(15:00):
children involved in like juggling with this time wise,
financially, etcetera. It involves a lot of thought, a
lot of effort and I am so grateful that we can do this and
be there for our dad. And obviously we never expected
it to be any other way. But if he was a bitch ass, if he
(15:26):
was the worst, I would never go out of my way for him.
If he wasn't a good father, if Ididn't know that he wanted the
absolute best for me. Our relationship now is a
reflection of what he nurtured. It is what it is.
(15:48):
Nobody is entitled to being cared for by their children.
But do a good enough job and they'll find joy in it.
All right, All right, all right,enough of that sappy raging
nonsense. Let's get to the fun stuff.
Let's talk about things that popour weekly pop culture segment.
(16:12):
We are starting with Megan and Harry.
All right, this is so important.This is so important.
Megan and Harry never said that they wanted privacy.
Not in that Instagram post, not in the Oprah interview, not
once. That entire narrative was
made-up by the press and repeated by people who don't
(16:33):
read past headlines. OK, When they step back in 2020,
what they actually said was we intend to step back as senior
members of the royal family and become financially independent.
That was a quote, a direct quote.
Not leave, not disappear. They even proposed a model where
(16:54):
they'd continue fulfilling certain royal duties part time,
but they were told no, we know this.
This was made well known. They didn't say that they were
retreating to a bunker in the Swiss Alps to churn butter and
live off the grid. I don't know what it is about
the Swiss Alps today, but I'll ask.
(17:15):
They said they wanted a role that didn't involve being hunted
by tabloids or controlled by thecrown, by the Firm.
And Harry, of all people, has every right to draw the line.
He didn't just read about what the press did to his mother, he
lived through it. He watched the machine, the
firm, chew her up and spit her out until it quite literally
killed her. And then he saw it start to
(17:36):
happen to Megan and the Firm. Instead of protecting them, the
palace was too busy keeping warmrelations with the very outlets
that were destroying Maggie. Let's not forget that Buckingham
Palace host an annual Christmas party for the British tabloids.
Literal like champagne and fucking minced pies with the
(17:59):
same people who ran the headlinecalling Megan straight out of
fucking Compton. They had the power to issue a
statement defending her. They had the power to shut it
all down, frankly, and they chose silence.
And in this circumstance where we've already seen the
(18:20):
horrifying outcome, the silence is not neutrality.
That is complicity. And the part that people really
conveniently ignore is that during the Oprah interview, she
literally asked Megan, this is aquote, Did you leave because of
(18:40):
the media? Did you leave because you wanted
privacy? And how Megan responded was, no,
I left because I was not being protected, OK?
She even clarified later. Further, she said it's about
boundaries. He said it's about boundaries
and respect. If you share one photo of your
(19:01):
child, that does not entitle people to your entitled entire
camera roll. OK, So what they were asking for
was not privacy, it's literally just consent.
But because they didn't roll over and just let the British
tabloids, the paps, dissect their trauma in real time and I
(19:24):
don't know, just fucking trampleall over her silently, they spun
it as hypocrisy. OK, they they want privacy, but
they're on Netflix. No, they wanted agency.
They wanted to share on their own terms, not to be ripped
apart by racist headlines for sport.
(19:48):
And don't forget that the first time we ever formally heard of
Harry addressing the relationship with Megan was him
calling out the press for racism.
For inflicting pain on his wife emotionally.
(20:08):
This wasn't anything new. It wasn't like it was the first
time it came up was on Oprah. OK, They want to share on their
own terms. That is it.
That is quite literally the onlything that they've ever asked
for. And what I've provided you just
now is top to bottom, what they've said about privacy.
(20:35):
There isn't anything else. There isn't any more context.
OK, if you're continuously repeating, oh, my God, they ask
for privacy. But look what?
They're always on television. Look at them.
The Netflix. Look at Oh my God, she now has
an Instagram account. You're pathetic.
Obviously. You know how I feel about these
(20:55):
people. You guys know the dregs of
society. They're pathetic.
They're gross. They're disgusting.
Don't even get me started on howthey call Megan supporters
sugars. We'll talk about that some
fucking other time. But enough with this stupid
narrative. They asked for what normal
(21:18):
celebrities ask for. We are public people that share
what we want to share just like everybody else does.
They said we are going to becomefinancially independent and they
did OK, That's wrong. OK?
Don't get me started on all of this title drama, OK?
(21:41):
Because they stepped back from duties, moved continents and
decided to pay their own bills. They were asked to no longer use
their HRH title by the Palace and they obliged.
OK. And meanwhile Prince Andrew
(22:03):
still holds his HRA styling or whatever they call it, His Royal
Highness after settling a sexualassault case tied to Jeffrey
fucking Epstein. So did our president, but what
the fuck ever a case he paid offeventually.
(22:23):
Prince Edward, allegedly with help from the Queen, using money
from royal estates like the Dutchie of Lancaster which enjoy
tax exemptions and exist only because the monarchy's public
role. So just to be clear, Megan signs
like a single e-mail Her Royal Highness HRH Megan in 2021 and
(22:47):
people lose their ever loving minds.
They lose at how dare she. But Andrew the pervert, the
pedo, the fucking degenerate creep that is a stain on the
House of Windsor. Top to bottom, nothing, not a
peep. OK, so yeah, the next time
(23:09):
someone says, but didn't they ask for privacy, you can tell
them no. They asked for control over
their stories, over their image,over their boundaries, over
their brand. And the fact that people still
can't handle that, it says so much more about them and so very
little about Megan and Harry. They're not asking for anything
(23:29):
out-of-the-box. They never asked to be recluses.
Whatever. It was just a handy, easy
headline to run with a good spin, a fabulous spin that
people were all too eager to grab a hold of.
Enough about that. Why did I bring this up?
Why was this the top of mind? Oh, because I've hurt that baby
(23:51):
Mama, dad. Some baby Mama worked.
That thing. That video that just came out
about Megan and Harry Loki doinga crip walk just like English
Crip. That video came out.
People lost their minds. I think that the majority of
people who just were cut off by her we're not Megan fans.
(24:16):
We're not particularly fond of her aired towards.
I'm not really into this chick. She seems like she tries a
little too hard. She the Archetypes podcast.
Case in point, she's she's, she's a very serious lady.
OK, that's just who she is. She's the girl that wrote the
cleaning company about the sexist ad when she was a kid,
(24:39):
and she loves talking about it. She's a conscientious lassie,
and you know how much that matters to me.
And I like to consider myself a fairly conscientious person
myself. I just don't wear it on my
sleeve in the same way that she doesn't.
To be fair, she is held to a very different standard.
She is the Duchess of Sussex whenever it's convenient for her
(25:03):
haters and her behavior is not becoming of a Duchess or she is
being too haughty and she is behaving like she thinks she's
the Duchess of Sussex. And I thought she said she
fucking hated the crown and hated the monarchy.
Why is she even pretending like she could be?
They still have their titles. It was never even a part of the
(25:28):
conversation whether or not the their dukedom would be taken
away. They are going to be the
Sussexes forevermore, period, and Prince Harry is still Prince
Harry. He will be Prince Harry till he
dies, regardless of whether or not he fulfills formal royal
(25:49):
duties. The one thing that they required
was was security and for good reason.
This woman gets death threats ina real serious way.
Not like a housewife being like getting death threats.
It's, it's real. It's real shit.
(26:12):
This also came up when they wereshooting as ever for Netflix.
And they're like, Oh my God, whyis it that she didn't shoot in
her own home? She didn't shoot her cooking
show her lifestyle show in her own house.
That is so unrelatable. First of all, the majority of
people who have cooking shows are not cooking in their own
(26:34):
home kitchen. That is fucking.
That sounds like a disaster. Especially if you have children
and your home is a is an actual working family home.
Having cast and crew there for eight months out of the year
doesn't sound ideal. All right?
Not to mention the security issues, as people are constantly
(26:57):
saying, I will help you and yourblack babies.
Although let's be real, those babies are white.
Those are some white babies. All right, I don't know what the
hubbub is about. We haven't even been able to
address this, OK? The onslaught of rage has been
(27:17):
so extreme that we haven't even been able to addressed that her
children are white for all intents and purposes.
Passing doesn't even begin. Those are two beautiful ginger
snaps. OK, I didn't use the hard R
ginger snaps. Those are two white children. 2
(27:43):
white children, obviously I believe both Harry and Meghan
when they say that someone in the palace was inquiring about,
oh, it's skin tone. Will the child be, will it be a
Negro or will it agro? So again, you're not allowed to
say it, but I believe that happened.
(28:06):
But I do recall when that came up, the black community, we all
looked at each other and we werelike, this is the most non issue
of the non issues. Suddenly we hop over the pond,
she's about to marry the Prince and everyone's concerned whether
or not she's going to birth some, I don't know, some Onyx
(28:28):
African king. First of all, as we know black
women, we carry the eve gene. So who the fuck knows what could
possibly pop out. It's not frequent, but it does
happen. But honestly, 99% chance she was
going to she they were going to create the very white children
that we have now. And I know we haven't seen those
(28:50):
children's faces, but from the red straight hair and pale as
skin, I highly doubt they're going to turn around and show us
some, you know, we didn't expect.
And that's the far as I'm going to go with that.
All right, I talked about this for so much longer than I ever
(29:12):
intended or expected to. OK, Next up in are things that
pop segment are reality TV things.
We're talking about summer Houseand the Valley.
I don't have very much to say about the valley.
I'm not going to say it's dragging as of yet, but I'm
starting to feel the desperationbecause things aren't really
(29:34):
making sense to me. Particularly Jasmine.
In this last episode, we have the conflict between Janet,
Jason, and Jasmine and Jasmine told Kristen that someone told
her that Jason when he was out and about on the town on
(29:55):
business trips. I don't know.
He took off his ring implying that he was prowling for ladies
and I don't believe that to be true.
Honestly it may be he never put anything past a man, but I would
have a hard time believing that.He seems too nervous.
(30:18):
He seems like a bad liar, which is crazy to say about a lawyer.
Jason super hurt because he thought he and Janet were like
besties. They're the only two black
people on the show surrounded byall these fucking cookadoodle
Doo white people, one of them being his spouse.
They're close, OK? You can tell that Jason actually
(30:41):
felt very close to Jasmine, and perhaps that's why he behaved
like such a fucking weirdo when he confronted Danny about his
drinking. Jit did interrupt a few times in
that conversation between the three of them, but she was
asking just like, slight clarifying questions.
(31:02):
She wasn't derailing the whole thing.
Jeff's reaction to Janet wantingto participate even in the
slightest in a conversation about her husband potentially
taking off his ring when she's not around so that he can appear
single in front of women. Her reaction to Janet wanting to
(31:22):
be there, wanting to speak up was bonkers to me.
It's not so outrageous for Janetto have feelings about any of
this. And she didn't even give Janet
the opportunity to verbalize, I would imagine the majority of
the things that she was feeling,the way that Jasmine jumped down
(31:43):
Janet's throat, it was like, didI miss something?
Was this something a Bruin that I, I like was distracted by
JAX's psychosis and I just didn't see that this was a big
problem. If I think back to last season,
I don't remember very much of her or Zach being a part of the
(32:05):
drama. It was very much Jax, Britney,
Michelle and Jessie, Luke and Kristen.
And then Jasmine and Zach were like the outliers.
And you can see both of them stepping up their game or at
least attempting to. And I don't know if that's a
particularly good thing if you can notice that.
And I know I sound like a hypocrite because when we were
(32:27):
talking about Gabby last week, Iwas like, girl, you gotta get
with it. Be a part of some of the drama.
Put some like light behind your eyes, right?
Do fucking something. Get our blood pressure going in
some way. While I want them to do that
(32:50):
must feel natural. Let's start with Jasmine and her
Danny issue. I think that's valid, right?
Especially OK grabs her thigh, slaps her thigh and goes and he
looks at her and he says go get daddy a drink.
I'd be like you what the fuckingfreak?
Don't ever do that shit to me again.
(33:12):
Or and or you could punch him, you could slap him, whatever.
And then him grabbing her fiance's acts.
That's assault, full stop, period.
There's nothing questionable about that.
And I find people being like, like Jasmine's really
overreacting about how Danny behaved that night.
(33:33):
That Danny himself apologized for is insane to me.
If you get black out wasted and you start grabbing people,
that's insane. That's not normal.
And that's A and they should be speaking about it with such
heaviness and giving it the weight that it deserves.
(33:56):
Especially when Jasmine was sitting at that table after NIA
had left, when they had that kind of intervention with all
the girls and Jasmine was like crying and saying, maybe I'm
like, not over it. I don't think that.
I don't think that was fake. I don't.
But her reaction to Janet, I don't necessarily know that was
(34:17):
fake, but it makes me feel like,was your friendship with Janet
ever real? Because I do think you feel this
way about her. I think you think she's an awful
Karen psycho bitch, which is just like the IT was the essence
of what you were saying about her, Jasmine.
(34:37):
I believed you sold that shit. What I question is whether you
ever really liked her at all andhow you could become such close
friends with someone's like witha person whose wife you
absolutely fucking despise. Because that's that wasn't like
casual. I don't like this about you,
like you've been doing this or but that was I've been feeling
(35:01):
this shit for quite some time, and now is the perfect time to
let you know any result. I do think that Jasmine's
feelings are real, and I do believe that she isn't being
(35:21):
overdramatic about Danny touching them without their
consent. I don't think that she's being
overly dramatic about that. The Janet thing is what confuses
me the most, because Janet's nota great actress.
I can tell. That bitch actually thought you
guys were friends. I thought you guys were friends.
(35:43):
I didn't. I didn't know.
I didn't see that shit coming from the way I thought.
I honestly thought Jasmine was just going to apologize because
that's to be fair, that would have been the right thing to do.
And that would have resolved theconflict immediately probably,
especially since we're dealing with Jason and Jason would have
(36:04):
been like, OK, that makes sense.So if you want to keep it spicy,
I can see why and I could. OK, this is starting to make
sense. OK, so apparently I didn't have
that much to say about the valley, but onto summer house,
(36:25):
Summer house season what 9 reunion Part 2 and it was a
gutwan. It was filled with a couple.
Oh, it was filled with several surprises down.
First and foremost, I'd like to say good on Paige for not
(36:46):
succumbing to this myth of the milestones that you have to
reach between before XY and ZH. OK, I am sure many of women who
are in their early 30s would look at this relationship and
go, I'm in my 30s in my biological clock and I've
(37:07):
already invested this much time and I do love him.
And even if it felt wrong, they would just go down that road and
do it for fear of never getting anything that good ever again.
Even if they know that however good, it isn't good enough.
(37:28):
And that's OK. Good doesn't have to be good
enough. And I think a lot of women feel
very selfish acknowledging. And honestly, she saved herself
from a likely very messy divorcefrom someone who was probably
going to be a white collar criminal at some point in his
(37:50):
life. I'm sorry, but it's Oh my God,
the revelation that he actually did.
Craig actually got kicked out ofKyle and Amanda's wedding and
Paige had been lying for him, covering for him from years
because it was just so embarrassing.
And do you guys remember the first year that Paige and Craig
(38:10):
started dating, they did summer house together and Craig pitched
this fit about how he was too, too rich to clean.
I think I've talked about it before in the pod.
And I thought that was a turningpoint.
Like that behavior was so smarmy, so embarrassing, so
tacky, so not manly that she hadto have a come to Jesus
(38:34):
conversation with him. And that was when he decided to
behave like not a monster. And to find out that he
exhibited that same behavior, like the throwing things, being
destructive, like being a menaceat someone's wedding, one of the
(38:55):
biggest days of their life, is insane.
And I know so many of Craig's staunch supporters are like,
Paige was always so confident and she's no nonsense.
And there's absolutely no way that she would ever let any of
this type of thing slide. And Andy said it himself at the
(39:17):
reunion. You never know what's going on
in someone's relationship. And when you love someone, that
kind of love, romantic love is unreasonable.
It's not something 1 feels very often and when it comes about
you tend to make excuses for that person.
She was in love with him. I don't think she knew he was a
(39:40):
pathological liar when this all first started.
He met her on his upturn post actually passing the bar after
starting his business. He did appear on paper to be a
real person, a grown man if you will.
(40:00):
And that wasn't the case. And I cannot blame Paige for
staying with him. That's insanity.
That's insanity. So it's it's just, what a shame.
What a selfish fuck. And the fact that Paige said
(40:21):
you're never going to hear me say his name ever again.
What a little gangster queen obsessed.
Other things of note, Lexi isn'tcoming back.
She announced that after the episode aired.
I think that's a bad call. I actually think she decided.
I think that she is. She feels that she is beyond the
(40:43):
show. I believe that had she had a
warmer reception or felt that she connected more with the
girls and didn't have such a such drama with Jesse that she
probably would come back. But I also think that like her
ego and how she perceives herself is just too aggressive
(41:03):
for her to be able to actually be in the moment and enjoy her
time and be real in that house. I just don't think she's there
yet and I just get her. I need her mother and her sister
going. I'm not mad at it.
I don't necessarily see her career going in a direction that
(41:26):
involves her personality. She's very pretty.
I don't think she's that interesting, and she seems like
a simple a simple girl. But I do wish her the best.
I do. Lindsay and Turner are no longer
(41:47):
together. That's insane.
I actually didn't see that one coming the way she was talking
about it. Guys, am I the only one that got
the feeling that he came out to her 'cause she was like Andy
asked are you guys hooking up? Is it a friend's?
Is it a parent Co parenting withbenefits situation ship?
(42:08):
And she said no. So they're not hooking up,
they're not being romantic. He is spending the night to
probably care for this new born child that they share.
But when he was around the cast after the breakup happened but
(42:29):
before they let the world know, the cast couldn't tell that they
were broken. They were still behaving kindly.
I don't know if necessarily romantically, but at least
pleasantly and and sweetly enough to one another where
nobody ever thought that they were broken up.
And it's giving, first of all. Not sure what the fuck happened
(42:56):
to Lindsay. I have never seen, I've never
witnessed such a emotional, spiritual growth in my life.
Someone, she better get fucking human growth hormone injected
straight into her motherfucking veins every day because I am
(43:18):
impressed. Impressed, impressed.
I'm impressed. I'm rather impressed with this
lady. What an insightful queen.
Not angry, just seems to be truly happy and settled where
she is. And I don't know, I would put my
money on he's gay. I put my money on he's gay.
(43:42):
And that is the best case scenario because whether or not
their romantic relationship was going to work out or whether it
was going to end in a fiery pit of disaster, it's a flip of a
coin, right? It's a coin toss.
But whether or not you can raiseyour child with your gay best
(44:04):
friend, the success rates for that scenario must be through
the roof is all I'm trying to say.
Godspeed. Congratulations on the beautiful
Gemma baby. Congratulations on your husband.
I'm just going to. I'm just going to.
I just decided he's gay. And yeah, I think that's oh, no,
(44:24):
that's not it. Because Kyle and Amanda's
relationship was on the rocks atthe beginning of the summer,
which is what she, Amanda said, she did not mince her words.
She'd never spoken more clearly in her entire life.
She listed that shit out. She said you don't spend enough
time with me. You're either always working.
You're spending your weekends out at the club learning how to
(44:44):
DJ. We don't have any quality time
together. I'm ready to be a mother with
someone that is ready to be a father.
You're not ready to be a father.She has feelings.
She has feelings. And The thing is, you can tell,
and Andy also mentioned this, she feels good about herself on
(45:05):
the inside. She has light behind her eyes in
a way that she has never on the show before.
And Kyle does seem to also be thriving.
And Amanda seems to have gotten to a place of resolution, like
(45:26):
either he changes or he doesn't.And she, now that she is
properly medicated, has a careerof her own that isn't tethered
to this man and this company. She feels like she has agency
(45:46):
over her own life. And whether or not it works out
with Kyle, she wants it to. But if it doesn't?
And I feel that energy radiatingoff of her.
And I think that is exactly why we saw Kyle behave himself this
summer. She's gotten to that place.
You know how people say that like when women break up with
(46:08):
you, when they pull the trigger,they've already taken their time
to detach from the relationship.Like they've they've been done
with you for a year. By the time they actually say
the words, that is that's Amanda.
There has to be something to alleviate some of this pressure
on their relationship because this that's it doesn't have to
(46:32):
work this way. It doesn't have to be this way.
You something has got to give. You can't have your cake and
fucking eat it too. Hire someone, make less money,
get a have a sous chef, OK, haveAVP that is able to take some of
that burden off of you. And perhaps you're making a
little less money every year, and that is unfathomable to you
(46:57):
because you need money to have kids, but you don't need to
have. I'm selling a company.
It's going public money to have a strong relationship with your
wife and build the kind of trustand relationship you need to
bring future life into this world and feel confident in how
(47:18):
you're doing it and who you're doing it with.
And also, if you have time to DJ, you have time to pick up
another little hobby. The bitch just wants to spend
time with you. You want her to be nice to you?
She sang. Spend time with me and I'll be
nice to you. It's not rocket fucking science,
OK? And today, let's close out with
(47:39):
Hot Girl Things, our segment when we talk about politics,
policy, and global news, becausehot girls keep themselves very
well informed. And this week, I want to talk
about ICE as a lawless gang withan $8 billion budget.
So OK, let's talk about Los Angeles because the headlines
(47:59):
are calling it a crackdown in some places.
But what's happening looks a lotmore like a militarized sweep of
poor and immigrant neighborhoodscoordinated by an agency that
behaves more like a gang than a government office.
So ISIS out here doing the, I don't even want to say doing the
(48:19):
most, doing the worst, raiding homes without warrants,
detaining people without explanation and terrorizing
entire communities like it's a dystopian neighborhood watch
gang. OK.
And they're really not alone. Over the past few weeks or few
days, the National Guard and even active duty Marines have
(48:40):
been deployed into Los Angeles, supposedly in a logistics
capacity. But, but let's be honest, if it
walks like martial law and it talks like martial law, it's not
just fucking logistics. It's an intimidation tactic
dressed in camouflage, literal camo.
OK. And meanwhile, the actual
(49:03):
conditions for those Guard members are fucking abysmal.
They're sleeping on concrete. They're being fed bare minimum,
basically nothing rations, and they're reporting that they have
no idea why they're even there, what they're there to do.
So the only people. So.
(49:23):
So not only are we terrorizing civilians, we're also abusing
the soldiers that we claim to respect just to help ICE pull
off its latest public performance of cruelty.
So let's talk money, OK? Ice's budget is over $8 billion.
That is more than the EPA, the Environmental Protection Agency,
(49:45):
more than the CDC, the Center for Disease Control.
And with that funding, they've turned themselves into a rogue
force with almost 0 meaningful oversight.
They don't coordinate with locallaw enforcement.
They don't answer to any city officials.
They don't follow basic constitutional norms.
They just show up armed, anonymous, and virtually
(50:09):
untouchable. And somehow they always have the
money, even though they are spending their budget for the
fiscal year in such rapid speed that they are so close to
running their out of their wholebudget by June.
And Congress has to step in withincremental funds in order to
(50:30):
keep them going. Not because anything special is
happening, but because Donald Trump is it.
It is running a freak show spectacle, OK, And it's not
happening in some policy briefing, OK, This is it
hypothetical. It is unfolding in broad
(50:52):
daylight. It's happening in schools,
bodegas, in restaurants and walkup apartments.
Ice isn't securing anything. OK, let's be very clear about
this. They're just reminding entire
communities that they can just show up at any time unannounced
(51:14):
for no reason and ruin their lives.
But here is the thing, people are fighting back and it is
working OK. Just this month, the City of
Glendale, CA, terminated its contact contract with ICE to
hold detainees at local facilities.
And why? Why is that?
(51:35):
Why was this contract cancelled?Because residents showed up.
They showed up at City Council meetings, at protests online.
They signed petitions and they demanded the city cut ties.
And the real turning point, it'swhen the Glendale police chief
went on record and he said, and this is a quote, that they are
not going to be cooperating withICE or Homeland Security.
(51:59):
Three days later, that contract debt.
OK, So ICE, it's like it's untouchable, but they're not.
If they can be pushed out of Glendale, they can be pushed out
of anywhere. You just have to make it loud,
make it public and make it politically unsustainable for
(52:19):
them to stick around. All right.
And that is that for hot girl things.
And that's the show for today. We went so long that we don't
have time for questionable things.
But I will answer some of your Q&A.
(52:39):
And that's it for the show today.
We do not have enough time for questionable things.
I yapped for far too long, but Iwill be answering some of those
questions on Instagram. If you laughed or learned or
felt even slightly entertained, do your civic duty rate review
and subscribe. 5 stars only. Don't be weird.
(53:01):
You can listen to Surround things on Apple, Spotify,
wherever you get your podcast. And while you're at it, send
this episode to a friend who gets it, or next who doesn't.
I'm not really picky. Either way, you're doing the
Lord's work.
Hello and welcome to surround things, a podcast of for smart
bitches who like their TV trashyand their takes hot.
I am your host Serran Al Caba. How do you guys diddly do?
It has been quite a week. It's a scorcher out here, like
it's just been, it's been a shift in the vibe of the city,
(00:32):
like it's a pride. Something happened after
Memorial Day weekend. I've never really been a big
summer person. I have always considered myself
more of a emotional winter. Like I have SAD in the opposite
direction. But since I I started living
alone for I've really started enjoying the day, the sunshine.
(00:56):
That's that it's my body tellingme something because I swear to
God, I learn more. I've learned more about myself
in this year living by myself than I have in my entire fucking
life, certainly. And I've also allowed myself to
(01:17):
feel more in this past year thanI have for the span of my last
eight-year relationship. I have to say, what?
What was I doing this? Oh, yes.
So the city, it feels like it isjust it's alive.
It is. The people are running through
(01:39):
the streets. They're drunk, they're merry.
Oh my God, I saw so many. Oh, Pride was this past weekend
in DC and DC Pride is a sight tobehold, right?
It is a very progressive liberaltown, right?
I think 9394, perhaps even up to97% of us voted blue all the way
(02:05):
through in this past election, 2024, the devastation.
And so you can't imagine like people feel real comfortable
being themselves up in this pitch.
And I just, there are so many asses everywhere, so many men's
(02:26):
butt, so many butt cheeks, just little pale ice cream scoops
just glowing in the night. And I love it.
I as a woman, obviously I get a little anxiety when I see nude
people trouncing about because men are scary.
And then I realize these are men.
(02:47):
And then I remember. But men are also afraid of men.
Isn't insane This predicament they put us in?
There are protectors. They're the only ones that can
protect us from all the scary things out in the world.
When they're the scary things out in the world.
It's really such a fucking racket.
Such a wreck. Anyways, Speaking of racket,
(03:10):
Coco Goth. Provo darling, her opponent
didn't give her flowers. Of course.
Listen, I already went off aboutthat bitch, OK?
Let's just call her that bitch on my Instagram, my TikTok.
So if you want to hear me, I don't know, read her to filth.
(03:34):
Go forth please. You should be following me
freeware or routine. But the gist, I'm going to keep
my energy on the pod positive about Coco Goff.
Proud of you, Boo. Great work.
You're not one of my stories forthe day, for things that pop
because this isn't a sports podcast, but you are a queen.
(03:59):
You're a Quan, a Quan Quan, and I'm so proud of you.
All right, you keep just being your excellent, classy, graceful
queenie cell. My God, that bitch has more
grace in her little finger than I have in my entire body, OK?
(04:20):
She is just handled every jab from her losing opponent like a
fucking queen. And that is all I shall say
about that. Actually.
Let's rewind. Let's really just dive on in
first with main character things, A segment where I regale
(04:42):
you with stories of my week, my life, and you listen and tell me
that I'm perfect, flawless, gorgeous, and you love me.
OK, I don't want to talk about this too deeply, but it is
important to mention. My father is back in the
hospital. It's a thing where his heart is
(05:04):
causing issues in different areas of his body and he was all
aging parents. It's tough, it's not great.
But I saw this TikTok video thisweek of this woman who calls
herself the doormat mom. And she said something along the
lines of it's bullshit when children say that they don't owe
(05:28):
their parents anything. And I forget like, too
existential too quickly today. But to get very existential very
quickly, we've already had this conversation about what the
ethics are of bringing life intothis world without their
consent. And then what you can expect
from said life once they are thrust into this cold, hard
(05:50):
world. And where I landed is you can't
expect much. It's a crapshoot, right?
It deciding to have children is an insular thing, and it has
absolutely nothing to do with the specific life you brought
into the world. When you have a child, you have
a concept of what it feels like to be a parent and what it a
(06:12):
concept of what it's like to have a child and raise a child.
But you don't know that specificsoul.
You don't know whether that thatbeing will align with with how
you want them to turn out, whether that be in a better or
worse way by, I don't know, whomever standards.
(06:33):
So you, I think as a parent, just have to trust that you can
be a good custodian of this little soul and nurture them in
a way that will turn them into decent, kind, empathetic,
conscientious little people and hopefully adults.
(06:56):
And that you're able to nurture their gifts and whatever it is
that that their nature is and guide them onto a path of
decency. It's truly just like decency and
respect and hard work and kindness.
And so beyond that, your child could very much dislike the way
(07:24):
that you raised them and not align with what you had planned
for their future. And that doesn't make them a bad
kid. Beyond that, the details of what
fills in those gaps are up to that.
(07:46):
As long as they're bringing verylittle harm into this world and
doing their best to bring in as much good as possible, then what
else can? Does that matter?
You don't. You're not owed access to them.
You're not owed any support fromthem, financially, emotionally,
none of that. It's that you don't get any
(08:11):
other than the intrinsic value of being someone's parent.
And if that's not enough for you, then you shouldn't be
someone's parent. And of course, I am thinking
about this in the context of my relationship with my dad as he's
aging right now and he requires more care than he ever has in
(08:34):
his life. He's really never asked very
much of us at all. But now, even though it's scary
and it is there, there's no chaos, there's no confusion.
He knows exactly where his family is.
He knows his four daughters are circling around him, he knows
his wife is by his side, and he knows he will be cared for
fully, like fiercely, without question or hesitation.
(08:58):
And that's not because we owe him as his daughters, but
because he's earned that care over a lifetime of kindness, of
presence and stability, emotional safety.
He's made it easy to love him right?
So we do not to get much and that doesn't mean that things
(09:20):
were always perfect. Each of us had our conflicts
with him. Some of them were small, some of
them were very big and some of them fall out lasted quite some
time. But at the end of the day, we
always found our way back to each other.
But the through line, even in any conflict that we had, in
retrospect at least it his intentions were always good.
(09:45):
They were always for our good. Specifically, it was never about
his ego. It was about our survival.
It was about us being able to thrive, us being able to
compete, us being healthy and having a happiness and living a
good life in this country that he sacrificed so much to come to
for our sake. His adoration for us was
(10:07):
unmistakable. He's not a perfect man, of
course, but we always felt safe in the fact that he wanted to be
and was a good father. So you can imagine how high my
fucking blood pressure spiked when I came across the TikTok
from that woman, right? The doormat mom, she's crying on
(10:30):
camera about her estranged daughter.
And she like insists the children owe their parents for
raising that all right and caring and nurturing to your own
standards. That was our subjective.
And the child doesn't get a say.Obviously, it does not entitle
you to a relationship forever with your child meeting the bare
(10:53):
minimum standards to to allow this life that you brought into
the world for no reason other than you wanted them here.
OK, you keeping them alive is literally the bare minimum what
you could do. And when that concept of no one
(11:17):
asks to be born is brought up, this woman, the storm at mom,
she says it. That's just a way to shut down
the conversation and avoid resolution.
OK? No, no, your daughter does not
want resolution. And mind you, her daughter has
popped back up onto the scene after discovering her mom's
Internet presence where she has made herself this like victim of
(11:41):
her estranged daughter. I don't know how you could be a
victim of someone who is actively trying to escape you.
But alas, I think her daughter had enough.
And she piped up and said this is what the deal was.
But nobody was surprised obviously, because 90% of her
comments and her feedback on herpage are this is a you problem.
Obviously your daughter doesn't want to be around you.
(12:03):
You're a looney tune, OK? Any result?
She says that that's a way to shut down the conversation,
pointing out that nobody has to be born, therefore you can't owe
someone for doing something thatyou never asked for, right?
Your daughter wasn't, doesn't want resolution because she
doesn't want a relationship withyou.
And that's cruelty. That is what happens when
(12:25):
someone says I am no longer available to be harmed, to be
abused by you. And the part that pisses me off
the most, right, as if I'm not already pissed, is you don't
want resolution. You want access.
You want access to her. You want access to her kids.
You want access to her timeline,to the life she built in spite
(12:46):
of you. You want to leach proximity to
her, not to repair what you broke.
She likely dreams of fucking disappearing into the Swiss Alps
and becoming fucking fro line Gertrude before she would let
you near her children. OK, because here's being a
(13:07):
parent doesn't stop when your child grows up.
And sometimes the most loving thing that you can do as a
parent is leave your child the fuck low.
If you caused so much fucking damage that your child went no
contact and you still can't takeaccountability, you were never
(13:30):
parenting. You were performing possession.
You were issuing demands under the guise of sacrifice.
So when my sisters and I are in the hospital rearranging our
lives without a second thought because we want to be there for
(13:50):
a man who deserves to be loved this way, the way that he is
experiencing and the thought of him ever being confused or
wondering where we are, where his family went, It makes me
want to scream, throw up, cry, all of the things because
(14:11):
obviously would never leave him.Not out of obligation, but out
of devotion. So no Long story short, TLDR
parenting does not entitle you to anything, but being a good
one might invite something back.You're not entitled to it, but
(14:36):
if you are a good one, they willstill want you around.
They will go out of your their way to be good to you, to make
sure that you are comfortable, to make sure that you have
access to their grandchildren. I think maybe it's the fact that
I am seeing how much work it involves, even with multiple
(15:00):
children involved in like juggling with this time wise,
financially, etcetera. It involves a lot of thought, a
lot of effort and I am so grateful that we can do this and
be there for our dad. And obviously we never expected
it to be any other way. But if he was a bitch ass, if he
(15:26):
was the worst, I would never go out of my way for him.
If he wasn't a good father, if Ididn't know that he wanted the
absolute best for me. Our relationship now is a
reflection of what he nurtured. It is what it is.
(15:48):
Nobody is entitled to being cared for by their children.
But do a good enough job and they'll find joy in it.
All right, All right, all right,enough of that sappy raging
nonsense. Let's get to the fun stuff.
Let's talk about things that popour weekly pop culture segment.
(16:12):
We are starting with Megan and Harry.
All right, this is so important.This is so important.
Megan and Harry never said that they wanted privacy.
Not in that Instagram post, not in the Oprah interview, not
once. That entire narrative was
made-up by the press and repeated by people who don't
(16:33):
read past headlines. OK, When they step back in 2020,
what they actually said was we intend to step back as senior
members of the royal family and become financially independent.
That was a quote, a direct quote.
Not leave, not disappear. They even proposed a model where
(16:54):
they'd continue fulfilling certain royal duties part time,
but they were told no, we know this.
This was made well known. They didn't say that they were
retreating to a bunker in the Swiss Alps to churn butter and
live off the grid. I don't know what it is about
the Swiss Alps today, but I'll ask.
(17:15):
They said they wanted a role that didn't involve being hunted
by tabloids or controlled by thecrown, by the Firm.
And Harry, of all people, has every right to draw the line.
He didn't just read about what the press did to his mother, he
lived through it. He watched the machine, the
firm, chew her up and spit her out until it quite literally
killed her. And then he saw it start to
(17:36):
happen to Megan and the Firm. Instead of protecting them, the
palace was too busy keeping warmrelations with the very outlets
that were destroying Maggie. Let's not forget that Buckingham
Palace host an annual Christmas party for the British tabloids.
Literal like champagne and fucking minced pies with the
(17:59):
same people who ran the headlinecalling Megan straight out of
fucking Compton. They had the power to issue a
statement defending her. They had the power to shut it
all down, frankly, and they chose silence.
And in this circumstance where we've already seen the
(18:20):
horrifying outcome, the silence is not neutrality.
That is complicity. And the part that people really
conveniently ignore is that during the Oprah interview, she
literally asked Megan, this is aquote, Did you leave because of
(18:40):
the media? Did you leave because you wanted
privacy? And how Megan responded was, no,
I left because I was not being protected, OK?
She even clarified later. Further, she said it's about
boundaries. He said it's about boundaries
and respect. If you share one photo of your
(19:01):
child, that does not entitle people to your entitled entire
camera roll. OK, So what they were asking for
was not privacy, it's literally just consent.
But because they didn't roll over and just let the British
tabloids, the paps, dissect their trauma in real time and I
(19:24):
don't know, just fucking trampleall over her silently, they spun
it as hypocrisy. OK, they they want privacy, but
they're on Netflix. No, they wanted agency.
They wanted to share on their own terms, not to be ripped
apart by racist headlines for sport.
(19:48):
And don't forget that the first time we ever formally heard of
Harry addressing the relationship with Megan was him
calling out the press for racism.
For inflicting pain on his wife emotionally.
(20:08):
This wasn't anything new. It wasn't like it was the first
time it came up was on Oprah. OK, They want to share on their
own terms. That is it.
That is quite literally the onlything that they've ever asked
for. And what I've provided you just
now is top to bottom, what they've said about privacy.
(20:35):
There isn't anything else. There isn't any more context.
OK, if you're continuously repeating, oh, my God, they ask
for privacy. But look what?
They're always on television. Look at them.
The Netflix. Look at Oh my God, she now has
an Instagram account. You're pathetic.
Obviously. You know how I feel about these
(20:55):
people. You guys know the dregs of
society. They're pathetic.
They're gross. They're disgusting.
Don't even get me started on howthey call Megan supporters
sugars. We'll talk about that some
fucking other time. But enough with this stupid
narrative. They asked for what normal
(21:18):
celebrities ask for. We are public people that share
what we want to share just like everybody else does.
They said we are going to becomefinancially independent and they
did OK, That's wrong. OK?
Don't get me started on all of this title drama, OK?
(21:41):
Because they stepped back from duties, moved continents and
decided to pay their own bills. They were asked to no longer use
their HRH title by the Palace and they obliged.
OK. And meanwhile Prince Andrew
(22:03):
still holds his HRA styling or whatever they call it, His Royal
Highness after settling a sexualassault case tied to Jeffrey
fucking Epstein. So did our president, but what
the fuck ever a case he paid offeventually.
(22:23):
Prince Edward, allegedly with help from the Queen, using money
from royal estates like the Dutchie of Lancaster which enjoy
tax exemptions and exist only because the monarchy's public
role. So just to be clear, Megan signs
like a single e-mail Her Royal Highness HRH Megan in 2021 and
(22:47):
people lose their ever loving minds.
They lose at how dare she. But Andrew the pervert, the
pedo, the fucking degenerate creep that is a stain on the
House of Windsor. Top to bottom, nothing, not a
peep. OK, so yeah, the next time
(23:09):
someone says, but didn't they ask for privacy, you can tell
them no. They asked for control over
their stories, over their image,over their boundaries, over
their brand. And the fact that people still
can't handle that, it says so much more about them and so very
little about Megan and Harry. They're not asking for anything
(23:29):
out-of-the-box. They never asked to be recluses.
Whatever. It was just a handy, easy
headline to run with a good spin, a fabulous spin that
people were all too eager to grab a hold of.
Enough about that. Why did I bring this up?
Why was this the top of mind? Oh, because I've hurt that baby
(23:51):
Mama, dad. Some baby Mama worked.
That thing. That video that just came out
about Megan and Harry Loki doinga crip walk just like English
Crip. That video came out.
People lost their minds. I think that the majority of
people who just were cut off by her we're not Megan fans.
(24:16):
We're not particularly fond of her aired towards.
I'm not really into this chick. She seems like she tries a
little too hard. She the Archetypes podcast.
Case in point, she's she's, she's a very serious lady.
OK, that's just who she is. She's the girl that wrote the
cleaning company about the sexist ad when she was a kid,
(24:39):
and she loves talking about it. She's a conscientious lassie,
and you know how much that matters to me.
And I like to consider myself a fairly conscientious person
myself. I just don't wear it on my
sleeve in the same way that she doesn't.
To be fair, she is held to a very different standard.
She is the Duchess of Sussex whenever it's convenient for her
(25:03):
haters and her behavior is not becoming of a Duchess or she is
being too haughty and she is behaving like she thinks she's
the Duchess of Sussex. And I thought she said she
fucking hated the crown and hated the monarchy.
Why is she even pretending like she could be?
They still have their titles. It was never even a part of the
(25:28):
conversation whether or not the their dukedom would be taken
away. They are going to be the
Sussexes forevermore, period, and Prince Harry is still Prince
Harry. He will be Prince Harry till he
dies, regardless of whether or not he fulfills formal royal
(25:49):
duties. The one thing that they required
was was security and for good reason.
This woman gets death threats ina real serious way.
Not like a housewife being like getting death threats.
It's, it's real. It's real shit.
(26:12):
This also came up when they wereshooting as ever for Netflix.
And they're like, Oh my God, whyis it that she didn't shoot in
her own home? She didn't shoot her cooking
show her lifestyle show in her own house.
That is so unrelatable. First of all, the majority of
people who have cooking shows are not cooking in their own
(26:34):
home kitchen. That is fucking.
That sounds like a disaster. Especially if you have children
and your home is a is an actual working family home.
Having cast and crew there for eight months out of the year
doesn't sound ideal. All right?
Not to mention the security issues, as people are constantly
(26:57):
saying, I will help you and yourblack babies.
Although let's be real, those babies are white.
Those are some white babies. All right, I don't know what the
hubbub is about. We haven't even been able to
address this, OK? The onslaught of rage has been
(27:17):
so extreme that we haven't even been able to addressed that her
children are white for all intents and purposes.
Passing doesn't even begin. Those are two beautiful ginger
snaps. OK, I didn't use the hard R
ginger snaps. Those are two white children. 2
(27:43):
white children, obviously I believe both Harry and Meghan
when they say that someone in the palace was inquiring about,
oh, it's skin tone. Will the child be, will it be a
Negro or will it agro? So again, you're not allowed to
say it, but I believe that happened.
(28:06):
But I do recall when that came up, the black community, we all
looked at each other and we werelike, this is the most non issue
of the non issues. Suddenly we hop over the pond,
she's about to marry the Prince and everyone's concerned whether
or not she's going to birth some, I don't know, some Onyx
(28:28):
African king. First of all, as we know black
women, we carry the eve gene. So who the fuck knows what could
possibly pop out. It's not frequent, but it does
happen. But honestly, 99% chance she was
going to she they were going to create the very white children
that we have now. And I know we haven't seen those
(28:50):
children's faces, but from the red straight hair and pale as
skin, I highly doubt they're going to turn around and show us
some, you know, we didn't expect.
And that's the far as I'm going to go with that.
All right, I talked about this for so much longer than I ever
(29:12):
intended or expected to. OK, Next up in are things that
pop segment are reality TV things.
We're talking about summer Houseand the Valley.
I don't have very much to say about the valley.
I'm not going to say it's dragging as of yet, but I'm
starting to feel the desperationbecause things aren't really
(29:34):
making sense to me. Particularly Jasmine.
In this last episode, we have the conflict between Janet,
Jason, and Jasmine and Jasmine told Kristen that someone told
her that Jason when he was out and about on the town on
(29:55):
business trips. I don't know.
He took off his ring implying that he was prowling for ladies
and I don't believe that to be true.
Honestly it may be he never put anything past a man, but I would
have a hard time believing that.He seems too nervous.
(30:18):
He seems like a bad liar, which is crazy to say about a lawyer.
Jason super hurt because he thought he and Janet were like
besties. They're the only two black
people on the show surrounded byall these fucking cookadoodle
Doo white people, one of them being his spouse.
They're close, OK? You can tell that Jason actually
(30:41):
felt very close to Jasmine, and perhaps that's why he behaved
like such a fucking weirdo when he confronted Danny about his
drinking. Jit did interrupt a few times in
that conversation between the three of them, but she was
asking just like, slight clarifying questions.
(31:02):
She wasn't derailing the whole thing.
Jeff's reaction to Janet wantingto participate even in the
slightest in a conversation about her husband potentially
taking off his ring when she's not around so that he can appear
single in front of women. Her reaction to Janet wanting to
(31:22):
be there, wanting to speak up was bonkers to me.
It's not so outrageous for Janetto have feelings about any of
this. And she didn't even give Janet
the opportunity to verbalize, I would imagine the majority of
the things that she was feeling,the way that Jasmine jumped down
(31:43):
Janet's throat, it was like, didI miss something?
Was this something a Bruin that I, I like was distracted by
JAX's psychosis and I just didn't see that this was a big
problem. If I think back to last season,
I don't remember very much of her or Zach being a part of the
(32:05):
drama. It was very much Jax, Britney,
Michelle and Jessie, Luke and Kristen.
And then Jasmine and Zach were like the outliers.
And you can see both of them stepping up their game or at
least attempting to. And I don't know if that's a
particularly good thing if you can notice that.
And I know I sound like a hypocrite because when we were
(32:27):
talking about Gabby last week, Iwas like, girl, you gotta get
with it. Be a part of some of the drama.
Put some like light behind your eyes, right?
Do fucking something. Get our blood pressure going in
some way. While I want them to do that
(32:50):
must feel natural. Let's start with Jasmine and her
Danny issue. I think that's valid, right?
Especially OK grabs her thigh, slaps her thigh and goes and he
looks at her and he says go get daddy a drink.
I'd be like you what the fuckingfreak?
Don't ever do that shit to me again.
(33:12):
Or and or you could punch him, you could slap him, whatever.
And then him grabbing her fiance's acts.
That's assault, full stop, period.
There's nothing questionable about that.
And I find people being like, like Jasmine's really
overreacting about how Danny behaved that night.
(33:33):
That Danny himself apologized for is insane to me.
If you get black out wasted and you start grabbing people,
that's insane. That's not normal.
And that's A and they should be speaking about it with such
heaviness and giving it the weight that it deserves.
(33:56):
Especially when Jasmine was sitting at that table after NIA
had left, when they had that kind of intervention with all
the girls and Jasmine was like crying and saying, maybe I'm
like, not over it. I don't think that.
I don't think that was fake. I don't.
But her reaction to Janet, I don't necessarily know that was
(34:17):
fake, but it makes me feel like,was your friendship with Janet
ever real? Because I do think you feel this
way about her. I think you think she's an awful
Karen psycho bitch, which is just like the IT was the essence
of what you were saying about her, Jasmine.
(34:37):
I believed you sold that shit. What I question is whether you
ever really liked her at all andhow you could become such close
friends with someone's like witha person whose wife you
absolutely fucking despise. Because that's that wasn't like
casual. I don't like this about you,
like you've been doing this or but that was I've been feeling
(35:01):
this shit for quite some time, and now is the perfect time to
let you know any result. I do think that Jasmine's
feelings are real, and I do believe that she isn't being
(35:21):
overdramatic about Danny touching them without their
consent. I don't think that she's being
overly dramatic about that. The Janet thing is what confuses
me the most, because Janet's nota great actress.
I can tell. That bitch actually thought you
guys were friends. I thought you guys were friends.
(35:43):
I didn't. I didn't know.
I didn't see that shit coming from the way I thought.
I honestly thought Jasmine was just going to apologize because
that's to be fair, that would have been the right thing to do.
And that would have resolved theconflict immediately probably,
especially since we're dealing with Jason and Jason would have
(36:04):
been like, OK, that makes sense.So if you want to keep it spicy,
I can see why and I could. OK, this is starting to make
sense. OK, so apparently I didn't have
that much to say about the valley, but onto summer house,
(36:25):
Summer house season what 9 reunion Part 2 and it was a
gutwan. It was filled with a couple.
Oh, it was filled with several surprises down.
First and foremost, I'd like to say good on Paige for not
(36:46):
succumbing to this myth of the milestones that you have to
reach between before XY and ZH. OK, I am sure many of women who
are in their early 30s would look at this relationship and
go, I'm in my 30s in my biological clock and I've
(37:07):
already invested this much time and I do love him.
And even if it felt wrong, they would just go down that road and
do it for fear of never getting anything that good ever again.
Even if they know that however good, it isn't good enough.
(37:28):
And that's OK. Good doesn't have to be good
enough. And I think a lot of women feel
very selfish acknowledging. And honestly, she saved herself
from a likely very messy divorcefrom someone who was probably
going to be a white collar criminal at some point in his
(37:50):
life. I'm sorry, but it's Oh my God,
the revelation that he actually did.
Craig actually got kicked out ofKyle and Amanda's wedding and
Paige had been lying for him, covering for him from years
because it was just so embarrassing.
And do you guys remember the first year that Paige and Craig
(38:10):
started dating, they did summer house together and Craig pitched
this fit about how he was too, too rich to clean.
I think I've talked about it before in the pod.
And I thought that was a turningpoint.
Like that behavior was so smarmy, so embarrassing, so
tacky, so not manly that she hadto have a come to Jesus
(38:34):
conversation with him. And that was when he decided to
behave like not a monster. And to find out that he
exhibited that same behavior, like the throwing things, being
destructive, like being a menaceat someone's wedding, one of the
(38:55):
biggest days of their life, is insane.
And I know so many of Craig's staunch supporters are like,
Paige was always so confident and she's no nonsense.
And there's absolutely no way that she would ever let any of
this type of thing slide. And Andy said it himself at the
(39:17):
reunion. You never know what's going on
in someone's relationship. And when you love someone, that
kind of love, romantic love is unreasonable.
It's not something 1 feels very often and when it comes about
you tend to make excuses for that person.
She was in love with him. I don't think she knew he was a
(39:40):
pathological liar when this all first started.
He met her on his upturn post actually passing the bar after
starting his business. He did appear on paper to be a
real person, a grown man if you will.
(40:00):
And that wasn't the case. And I cannot blame Paige for
staying with him. That's insanity.
That's insanity. So it's it's just, what a shame.
What a selfish fuck. And the fact that Paige said
(40:21):
you're never going to hear me say his name ever again.
What a little gangster queen obsessed.
Other things of note, Lexi isn'tcoming back.
She announced that after the episode aired.
I think that's a bad call. I actually think she decided.
I think that she is. She feels that she is beyond the
(40:43):
show. I believe that had she had a
warmer reception or felt that she connected more with the
girls and didn't have such a such drama with Jesse that she
probably would come back. But I also think that like her
ego and how she perceives herself is just too aggressive
(41:03):
for her to be able to actually be in the moment and enjoy her
time and be real in that house. I just don't think she's there
yet and I just get her. I need her mother and her sister
going. I'm not mad at it.
I don't necessarily see her career going in a direction that
(41:26):
involves her personality. She's very pretty.
I don't think she's that interesting, and she seems like
a simple a simple girl. But I do wish her the best.
I do. Lindsay and Turner are no longer
(41:47):
together. That's insane.
I actually didn't see that one coming the way she was talking
about it. Guys, am I the only one that got
the feeling that he came out to her 'cause she was like Andy
asked are you guys hooking up? Is it a friend's?
Is it a parent Co parenting withbenefits situation ship?
(42:08):
And she said no. So they're not hooking up,
they're not being romantic. He is spending the night to
probably care for this new born child that they share.
But when he was around the cast after the breakup happened but
(42:29):
before they let the world know, the cast couldn't tell that they
were broken. They were still behaving kindly.
I don't know if necessarily romantically, but at least
pleasantly and and sweetly enough to one another where
nobody ever thought that they were broken up.
And it's giving, first of all. Not sure what the fuck happened
(42:56):
to Lindsay. I have never seen, I've never
witnessed such a emotional, spiritual growth in my life.
Someone, she better get fucking human growth hormone injected
straight into her motherfucking veins every day because I am
(43:18):
impressed. Impressed, impressed.
I'm impressed. I'm rather impressed with this
lady. What an insightful queen.
Not angry, just seems to be truly happy and settled where
she is. And I don't know, I would put my
money on he's gay. I put my money on he's gay.
(43:42):
And that is the best case scenario because whether or not
their romantic relationship was going to work out or whether it
was going to end in a fiery pit of disaster, it's a flip of a
coin, right? It's a coin toss.
But whether or not you can raiseyour child with your gay best
(44:04):
friend, the success rates for that scenario must be through
the roof is all I'm trying to say.
Godspeed. Congratulations on the beautiful
Gemma baby. Congratulations on your husband.
I'm just going to. I'm just going to.
I just decided he's gay. And yeah, I think that's oh, no,
(44:24):
that's not it. Because Kyle and Amanda's
relationship was on the rocks atthe beginning of the summer,
which is what she, Amanda said, she did not mince her words.
She'd never spoken more clearly in her entire life.
She listed that shit out. She said you don't spend enough
time with me. You're either always working.
You're spending your weekends out at the club learning how to
(44:44):
DJ. We don't have any quality time
together. I'm ready to be a mother with
someone that is ready to be a father.
You're not ready to be a father.She has feelings.
She has feelings. And The thing is, you can tell,
and Andy also mentioned this, she feels good about herself on
(45:05):
the inside. She has light behind her eyes in
a way that she has never on the show before.
And Kyle does seem to also be thriving.
And Amanda seems to have gotten to a place of resolution, like
(45:26):
either he changes or he doesn't.And she, now that she is
properly medicated, has a careerof her own that isn't tethered
to this man and this company. She feels like she has agency
(45:46):
over her own life. And whether or not it works out
with Kyle, she wants it to. But if it doesn't?
And I feel that energy radiatingoff of her.
And I think that is exactly why we saw Kyle behave himself this
summer. She's gotten to that place.
You know how people say that like when women break up with
(46:08):
you, when they pull the trigger,they've already taken their time
to detach from the relationship.Like they've they've been done
with you for a year. By the time they actually say
the words, that is that's Amanda.
There has to be something to alleviate some of this pressure
on their relationship because this that's it doesn't have to
(46:32):
work this way. It doesn't have to be this way.
You something has got to give. You can't have your cake and
fucking eat it too. Hire someone, make less money,
get a have a sous chef, OK, haveAVP that is able to take some of
that burden off of you. And perhaps you're making a
little less money every year, and that is unfathomable to you
(46:57):
because you need money to have kids, but you don't need to
have. I'm selling a company.
It's going public money to have a strong relationship with your
wife and build the kind of trustand relationship you need to
bring future life into this world and feel confident in how
(47:18):
you're doing it and who you're doing it with.
And also, if you have time to DJ, you have time to pick up
another little hobby. The bitch just wants to spend
time with you. You want her to be nice to you?
She sang. Spend time with me and I'll be
nice to you. It's not rocket fucking science,
OK? And today, let's close out with
(47:39):
Hot Girl Things, our segment when we talk about politics,
policy, and global news, becausehot girls keep themselves very
well informed. And this week, I want to talk
about ICE as a lawless gang withan $8 billion budget.
So OK, let's talk about Los Angeles because the headlines
(47:59):
are calling it a crackdown in some places.
But what's happening looks a lotmore like a militarized sweep of
poor and immigrant neighborhoodscoordinated by an agency that
behaves more like a gang than a government office.
So ISIS out here doing the, I don't even want to say doing the
(48:19):
most, doing the worst, raiding homes without warrants,
detaining people without explanation and terrorizing
entire communities like it's a dystopian neighborhood watch
gang. OK.
And they're really not alone. Over the past few weeks or few
days, the National Guard and even active duty Marines have
(48:40):
been deployed into Los Angeles, supposedly in a logistics
capacity. But, but let's be honest, if it
walks like martial law and it talks like martial law, it's not
just fucking logistics. It's an intimidation tactic
dressed in camouflage, literal camo.
OK. And meanwhile, the actual
(49:03):
conditions for those Guard members are fucking abysmal.
They're sleeping on concrete. They're being fed bare minimum,
basically nothing rations, and they're reporting that they have
no idea why they're even there, what they're there to do.
So the only people. So.
(49:23):
So not only are we terrorizing civilians, we're also abusing
the soldiers that we claim to respect just to help ICE pull
off its latest public performance of cruelty.
So let's talk money, OK? Ice's budget is over $8 billion.
That is more than the EPA, the Environmental Protection Agency,
(49:45):
more than the CDC, the Center for Disease Control.
And with that funding, they've turned themselves into a rogue
force with almost 0 meaningful oversight.
They don't coordinate with locallaw enforcement.
They don't answer to any city officials.
They don't follow basic constitutional norms.
They just show up armed, anonymous, and virtually
(50:09):
untouchable. And somehow they always have the
money, even though they are spending their budget for the
fiscal year in such rapid speed that they are so close to
running their out of their wholebudget by June.
And Congress has to step in withincremental funds in order to
(50:30):
keep them going. Not because anything special is
happening, but because Donald Trump is it.
It is running a freak show spectacle, OK, And it's not
happening in some policy briefing, OK, This is it
hypothetical. It is unfolding in broad
(50:52):
daylight. It's happening in schools,
bodegas, in restaurants and walkup apartments.
Ice isn't securing anything. OK, let's be very clear about
this. They're just reminding entire
communities that they can just show up at any time unannounced
(51:14):
for no reason and ruin their lives.
But here is the thing, people are fighting back and it is
working OK. Just this month, the City of
Glendale, CA, terminated its contact contract with ICE to
hold detainees at local facilities.
And why? Why is that?
(51:35):
Why was this contract cancelled?Because residents showed up.
They showed up at City Council meetings, at protests online.
They signed petitions and they demanded the city cut ties.
And the real turning point, it'swhen the Glendale police chief
went on record and he said, and this is a quote, that they are
not going to be cooperating withICE or Homeland Security.
(51:59):
Three days later, that contract debt.
OK, So ICE, it's like it's untouchable, but they're not.
If they can be pushed out of Glendale, they can be pushed out
of anywhere. You just have to make it loud,
make it public and make it politically unsustainable for
(52:19):
them to stick around. All right.
And that is that for hot girl things.
And that's the show for today. We went so long that we don't
have time for questionable things.
But I will answer some of your Q&A.
(52:39):
And that's it for the show today.
We do not have enough time for questionable things.
I yapped for far too long, but Iwill be answering some of those
questions on Instagram. If you laughed or learned or
felt even slightly entertained, do your civic duty rate review
and subscribe. 5 stars only. Don't be weird.
(53:01):
You can listen to Surround things on Apple, Spotify,
wherever you get your podcast. And while you're at it, send
this episode to a friend who gets it, or next who doesn't.
I'm not really picky. Either way, you're doing the
Lord's work.
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