April 11, 2025 • 47 mins
It's time to zoom out and focus on the big picture: What does it actually mean to be the titleholder? Beyond the wardrobe, the prep, and the preliminary jitters lies a powerful opportunity to create real impact and build the foundation for your future career.
In this episode, you'll hear:
- The difference between volunteering and partnerships—and why one offers long-term value while the other is often short-term
- A step-by-step guide to developing strategic partnerships that elevate your platform and help you serve with confidence and clarity
- Mindset support for those struggling with imposter syndrome or feeling overwhelmed by the idea of "doing it all"
- How your service initiative can become a professional launchpad from public speaking to job opportunities to resume builders
If you're feeling pressure to be "impressive," this episode will gently remind you: do it because you love it. Your platform doesn't need to be perfect, it just needs to be intentional and aligned with who you are and why you care.
Free App Download: Click here to download the Fearlessly Authentic App!
Socials: @sashandsoul | @fearlesslyauthenticcoach | @raeannajohnson
Websites: www.fearlesslyauthentic.com | www.sashandsoul.com
Email: info@fearlesslyauthenticcoach.com
April Masterclass: Volunteerism & Service Click Here to Register
If you’re looking for more than just surface-level prep—and you’re ready to prepare with strategy, support, and confidence that actually lasts—I’d love to be part of your process.
Schedule a FREE Consultation: Book a Call
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey you guys, welcome back to Sash and Soul.
I hope this episode finds youfabulous and thriving.
This week I'm pretty good.
This week I'm excited we areheading to, actually, you know,
as this episode launches, wewill be in Virginia Beach
visiting my mom and my stepdad,and looking forward to it.
(00:21):
They have been living like awayfrom us out of state for a few
years now and this will be thefirst time that we will go and
visit them for a long weekend,and so looking forward to it.
Unfortunately, my mom had a bitof an accident last week so
she's been using a scooterbecause she can't put any weight
on her ankle, so that'll put alittle bit of a damper on things
(00:44):
.
But also like we're really laidback and we're just going to,
you know kind of bum around andtake our time exploring Virginia
Beach and enjoying a little bitwarmer weather than what we're
experiencing here in Wisconsin.
It's been a little chilly,It'll be in like 40s and 50s
(01:06):
here at home and then inVirginia Beach I guess it's
going to be like 60s and sunnyfor the most part, I think.
So not as warm as it would be,you know, as we'd like it to be,
but it is what it is, so we'regoing to make the most of it.
It'll be just nice to get awayand not really have anything
that we have to do, but just beable to relax and spend some
quality time.
So we're looking forward tothat.
But yeah, outside of that, it'sthings are, things are.
(01:34):
It's an exciting time for youguys.
We've got orientations galoreand I, you know, contestant
numbers.
My clients are texting me withtheir contestant numbers.
I had one actually reach out tome over the weekend.
She's like I'm so glad that youdid that Sash and Soul episode
about contestant numbers and whythey don't matter, because
guess who's number one and y'allI get it.
I remember, I remember thestress of that and I do want to
(01:55):
just touch on that really quickbecause I had a thought that I
don't think I really talkedabout in that episode that I
have been communicating with myclients and in that episode I
talk about how contested numbersdon't matter.
The judges are going to findyou wherever you're at.
But I just I want to take amoment to acknowledge I
(02:16):
understand and I remember thekind of the strategy behind
choosing a contested number whenit came to the time of day that
you were going to interview, orwhat preliminary night you were
going to do talent versusonstage question versus evening
gown versus fitness and I justwanted to like, really quick,
like, do just a little bit of anappendix to the episode on
contestant numbers and why theydon't matter, because I do
(02:39):
remember that being a part of mydecision making.
But it was really just abouthow I was going to show up and
perform during those times, likeif I interviewed better in the
morning versus the afternoon, orif I wanted to get my talent
done earlier in the week versuslater.
It was more about that than itwas about my chances of winning
a preliminary award or whetheror not the judges would notice
(02:59):
me in that spot.
So I just wanted to like,really quickly, just do a bit of
an edit in addition to thatepisode, because I know that
y'all are in the throes of thattoo.
But if that's where you're at,where you've been doing
contestant lotteries, and youmight be a little bit nervous
about your contestant number,like definitely I want to refer
you back to that episode becauseit can be, I think, a healthy
(03:20):
and helpful perspective for youas you continue your mental
preparation for competition.
But speaking of preparation.
Today we're actually going tobe talking about preparing to be
the title holder.
So I know we often focus somuch time and energy on
preparing for the competitionitself practicing your walk,
(03:42):
practicing your talent,practicing interview, how you're
going to show up and presentyourself as the best possible
candidate for that job for theyear.
But I think what often we tendto kind of set on the back
burner is looking at what doesthe entire year of the title
holder actually look like?
What does it mean to do the job?
(04:03):
Do you have a realistic jobpreview of being the state title
holder?
And I really am likespecifically speaking about
those of you that are preparingfor, like, an MAO or USA state
title that would take you on tothe national level, because I
know a lot of that is ramping upfor this spring.
So that's really what I'mfocusing on, and also it just
(04:23):
comes from my personalexperience of having been a
state title holder in MissAmerica that I want to speak on
that and speak on what my MAOclients are going through right
now in preparation not just forthe competition but for the
entire year as a title holder,and I really push that a lot.
You'll often hear me say what'syour big picture?
Are you focusing on the bigpicture?
(04:44):
Are you clear on your bigpicture?
If you can stay focused on yourwhy why you're doing this, what
your plan is, what your goalsare that will help eliminate
some of this noise that oftengets in the way and causes a lot
of mindset glitches andsetbacks in terms of your
mentality going into acompetition.
So, focusing on the big picturetoday and specifically about
(05:08):
building your service initiativein strategic partnerships as a
title holder.
So we're not just talking aboutchoosing a platform topic and
starting to develop that andwriting your paper on that for
the judges to read.
Now we're talking about whatare you actually doing with it?
And we're graduating beyondjust the volunteer side of
(05:28):
things and going into how do youdevelop this as a program and
implement this for 365 daysthroughout an entire state and
then also bring this to anational stage and present it as
a project that you would wantto implement throughout your
entire year as a national titleholder.
(05:49):
So that's what we're talkingabout today.
If you want a little bit morehistory on my service
initiatives and developing aplatform from my unique
perspective and my experiencesperspective and my experiences.
I'm going to refer you back toepisode number 16, service
(06:10):
Initiatives and Developing aPlatform, where I go into depth
about how I chose my platformand how it evolved throughout
the years, and not only how itevolved, but how I kind of
pivoted and completely switchedmy platform, kind of in the
middle of my competition years,and I talk a lot about why
that's okay and really promotethat you choose a platform that
makes sense for you, for who youare, what you're passionate
(06:31):
about, what your goals are andthe thing that's going to
motivate you and energize you,not just deplete you, which is
often, I think, what we tend todo when we're trying to be
impressive.
So, as a reminder, as we divein your platform, your service
(06:52):
initiative, your program is notabout being impressive.
I hear that a lot like what arethe judges going to think of
this and is it going totranslate well?
Is it going to score well?
That's not what this is about.
It's about doing what you love,consistently and very
intentionally.
So we're going to keep that inmind kind of as a theme around
(07:14):
this entire episode.
So let's dive into this.
How do we shape our passioninto purpose, shape our passion
into purpose.
So how your platform is shapedis really going to influence the
(07:39):
way that you show up and it'sshaping who you are and it's
really kind of a core piece ofyour brand.
It's not your entire brand ever.
I don't ever advocate for yougoing into interview and just
talking about your platform,because you are so much more
than that but it's certainlygoing to shape you in many ways
and how you show up.
So my personal platform I'm justgoing to dive in really quick
to a brief overview.
(07:59):
It started because I lost mybrother, tyler, to a
methamphetamine addiction butultimately he died by suicide in
2005.
I was 15 years old and at thattime I already knew that I was
going to compete in Miss America.
We didn't have the teen programyet, so I was going to compete.
I was a Miss when I waseligible at 17.
And that tragedy, thatexperience, really shaped my
(08:23):
drive.
And it came a lot from my momwho was already very much diving
into how we could impact thelives of others in a positive
way through our tragedy.
So she was already creatingpositive change through this
very tragic loss that weexperienced.
So that was one of myinspirations, was her work, but
(08:46):
also knowing that the MissAmerica organization was going
to give me this platform to havea larger voice and a larger
impact throughout my community,I knew that that was going to be
my platform.
So for me it was.
I don't want to call it an easydecision, it was just one of
those things that was an obviouschoice.
I'll call it obvious, not easy,because it was not easy talking
(09:06):
about it, but it was anopportunity for me to gain some
power in what really depleted meand broke me in so many ways.
So it was my way of buildingthat power back in so many ways.
So it was my way of likebuilding that power back.
(09:27):
So it was an obvious choice forme to use the platform of the
Miss America organization as anopportunity to make change
through the tragedy that we hadexperienced.
And I did that for a few yearsuntil I burnt out because, as
you could imagine and I hope youdon't know from personal
experience, I would never wishthat on anyone but if you could
imagine how exhausting thatwould be to continue talking
(09:47):
about this, this trauma, thisloss that you had experienced.
And so I got to a point where Iwas pretty burnt out on that
and my mom encouraged me to justset it down for a while, if not
forever, that I didn't have tokeep trying to change the world,
that I needed to also putmyself first and take care of
myself.
And at that point she had alsodone the same because she had
(10:08):
five kids at home yet that sheneeded to take care of in a
business that she was trying torun, and so she had already made
that choice for herself, and soit was very encouraging for me
to make a healthy choice formyself in the same way.
And at the time I was in school,I was taking a lot of women and
gender studies courses and Ihad always been the girl that
was like I'm just as strong asthe boys and I'll arm wrestle
(10:31):
you and let's play 500 out inrecess, and, like you know just
a little, I wouldn't call myselfa tomboy, but I was definitely
like I'm powerful just as muchas the boys are, just as much as
the boys are.
And so the women in genderstudies classes just were like
(10:52):
they were my jam.
I dove deep into them, and so,after being part of the Miss
America organization for a fewyears and also having this
experience and just this naturalpassion for empowering women
and kind of feminism, I decidedto switch my platform to
empowering women mind, body andsoul.
And that's when I launched anonprofit and I was raising
scholarship money for youngwomen and running events and
(11:13):
working with other women-basedorganizations locally and just
kind of reset myself.
But then a couple of yearslater I really decided, like for
my heart, for my big picturefor the long term, of like who I
was and what I really wanted tobe doing with this opportunity,
(11:34):
especially if I was going towin Miss Wisconsin and take it
to a national stage.
I needed to go back to my rootsof where it all started, and so
I relaunched my platform oftalking about my brother.
It was Tyler's Legacy, theimpact of substance use on the
family, and it was the years ofexperience of like the first
couple of years of developingthis initial platform to
(11:55):
launching a brand new platformand having different experiences
and skills and opportunitieswith that.
That I think really led me intohaving a clearer vision for
what I wanted to get done withmy platform overall, and so I
think all of that culminatedinto what I was able to do and
the impact I was able to makethrough my final platform in the
(12:18):
Miss America organization.
So what I learned from workingon my platform I mean all the
things right, the typical thingsthat you hear like I developed
confidence.
I obviously like developed aclearer direction as I went
along and, I think, reallyimportantly, I developed this
clarity of my own voice.
(12:40):
Oftentimes I hear clientstalking about wanting to know
who they are and be able toarticulate their stories.
In fact, I was just having aconversation with a client this
week who was speaking to anoutgoing title holder.
That was, like you know, somuch of this is just about the
stories that I share and theconnections that I can make
through stories, and my clientwas all of a sudden anxious
(13:00):
about like oh my gosh, what aremy stories?
What do I talk about?
Like I have to think of thestories that I need to share
that will make these connections, and I'm going to argue that
that's the reverse approach.
You want to actually reversethat and go the other way around
of actually like buildingconnections first, because
stories are going to come withthose connections.
(13:22):
Like I think back to all thetimes that I had opportunities
to speak publicly and all thetimes that I had opportunities
to speak as part of a like apanelist at an event, like as an
expert or lived experiencepanelist, and you know anytime
that you're having opportunitiesto answer somebody's questions
(13:43):
after you kind of give yourpresentation.
That's when more stories comeout, especially if you are
genuinely answering thesequestions from your heart and
from a conversational approach.
These stories are going to comefrom the connections that you
make, so the more that you talkwith your audiences, the clearer
your message gets.
So the bottom line is you justhave to get started.
(14:06):
You just get started somewhere.
Now, as my stories developed,my platform got clearer, my
messaging got clearer.
I have developed this clarityof voice.
All of this work, then, isgoing to culminate and translate
into real world opportunities.
Okay, so you start with yourpassion, with your platform that
(14:30):
you've decided on, and you juststart doing stuff.
Get out there, start speaking,volunteer at events, and All of
these things that you are doingthroughout your years of service
are going to culminate intobuilding your resume through
these speaking engagements andall these other opportunities
(14:52):
that you're going to have.
For me, my experiencesdeveloping my platform and the
opportunities that I had totravel and to work with
different organizations and tomeet different people,
culminated in my professionalcareer, so actually one of my
job.
My second job out of collegeokay, let me rewind.
(15:14):
My first job quote unquote outof college was Miss Wisconsin
and then after that I worked fora nonprofit food bank here in
Milwaukee doing communityoutreach.
I got that job through anappearance as Miss Wisconsin and
then, when I wanted to diveback into more of the behavioral
(15:38):
health, addiction treatment,advocacy side of mental health
and addiction, I reached out tosome of the contacts that I had
made through the work that I haddone through my platform and
that is how I got my next jobdoing business development for a
nonprofit treatment center foraddiction.
And so all of these experiencesand the more that I put myself
(16:01):
out there really led to theselong-term successes.
And now today, obviously youknow I have a coaching business.
This is what I do full-time.
The more that I put myself outthere really led to these
long-term successes.
And now today, obviously youknow I have a coaching business.
This is what I do full-time,and I'm able to take those
experiences and pour them backinto the context of what I'm
coaching, into the lessons thatI develop and the curriculum.
So all of this to say, bringingit back to you.
(16:22):
I know that so many of you aregraduating from college and you
may be looking for a job rightnow and putting your resume out
there a lot.
Actually, one of my interns isin this space right now where
she's graduating, and it is verystressful.
I remember everyone asking you,from professors to friends, to
family members, to acquaintanceswhat are you going to do after
(16:44):
graduation?
Do you have a job yet?
And it's so stressful becauseyou already have that internal
pressure and all the fears andmaybe some imposter syndrome
going on of like what's the nextstep.
And then all this external,what seems like pressure of
people asking because they'regenuinely curious, but it's just
coming from everywhere.
I also remember being really,really overwhelmed by job
(17:11):
descriptions because I was likegosh, like I don't know, like I
went to school for you know howmany years and I have my degree
and like that's I mean the basicthing that you need for an
entry level position.
But all these job descriptionsare so like I don't know they
get.
They feel overwhelming becausethey're like I don't know.
They feel overwhelming becausethey're like I don't know if I
know how to do that and likethat's so specific, I've never
done that before and so, likethe imposter syndrome comes up.
(17:32):
But it's the skills that youlearn outside of the classroom
that prepares you for theprofessional world and that's
where being in pageantry anddoing your service work actually
gives you a leg up.
And so I want to encourage youto lean into that understanding
that the more that you do withyour platform within reason,
don't burn yourself out but themore that you do with your
(17:53):
platform leads to personal andprofessional growth, leads to
those resume builders and Ithink I mean it's hard to put
that into context when youhaven't worked in like a career
set, like in a professionalspace yet to like understand how
to be creative with your resumeand to look at your experiences
(18:13):
creatively and like I don'twant to say spin them, but
associate them with the thingsthat you're seeing on those job
descriptions of like okay, howdoes this experience that I had
translate into a skill thattranslates into this particular
piece of this role that I'mlooking at applying for?
(18:35):
So, as we go into more of thisconversation about building
partnerships with yourinitiative and being strategic,
keep that in mind that the morethat you're doing outside of the
classroom, the more you willdevelop your confidence and the
more that you're going todevelop that professional
(18:56):
experience that you can add toyour resume and that can help
ease some of the impostersyndrome that you might be
feeling and the fear that you'renot actually qualified for some
of these positions, because Iwould bet money that you are way
more qualified than youactually think that you are.
So your platform is really thefoundation for your professional
(19:16):
identity.
It is not just a pageant thing,especially if you have been
able to find a passion inservice that is somehow related
to what you want to doprofessionally and long-term,
and I understand that that's notalways the case.
We have let's look at MissAmerica 2024, madison Marsh that
(19:40):
her career is in the Air Forceand in aviation and her platform
is about, you know, her motherand running a nonprofit that
supports cancer research andresources, so definitely
disconnected from her career,but still like again, if we're
(20:01):
staying creative about this likestill adding those skills that
she'll be able to use inwhatever career field she
decides to go into.
And so I just want to pointthat out that just because it
may not be specificallyconnected doesn't mean that it
isn't going to benefit you inthe long run, but I am going to
talk quite a bit about how yourwork and your networking within
(20:22):
your platform can aid you inyour professional career today.
All right, so let's talk aboutpartnerships.
Partnerships is a thing that Italk about a lot with my clients
, especially as we are going tothe next level of developing
their platform.
So we're going to talk aboutwhy partnerships are important
and how they different from justvolunteering, because there is
a very clear difference betweenthose two.
(20:43):
Volunteering is simply givingof your time and energy, which
is very important, but considerhow one sided that is.
You show up at an event, yougive of your time, you give of
your energy, and then you leaveand maybe you'll take some
pictures for social media, whichis great like develops, like
(21:03):
your exposure, and showcases alot of what you value and
encourages other people to getinvolved as well.
So in that way, you know it'shelpful for you, but for the
most part, it's quite one sided.
When we're looking at actuallydeveloping and expanding your
mission, a partnership providesmutual value and it provides
(21:25):
visibility for both sides and itcan provide resources.
So let's dive into volunteeringa little bit more.
Volunteering, of course, iswhere many pageant women are
going to start.
It's where many of us startright.
I was in National Honor Societyin high school and I had the
required service hours that Ineeded to finish and I
(21:47):
volunteered through church andall these other things too.
So it is a really beautifulplace to begin because it gets
your foot in the door of knowingwhat it means to be of service
to other people.
You're donating your time,you're donating your presence
and you're donating your energyto a specific cause or
organization.
Volunteering is very oftenevent-based and it's short-term
(22:08):
and it's task-focused.
For example, this last weekend,my husband and I volunteered
our time for an organizationthat I feel very close to.
A very dear friend of mine runsit.
It's called Bereaved Togetherand it supports mothers that
have lost their children, and sothey have a Bereaved Mother's
Day conference coming up and wewere helping them prep for that,
(22:31):
and so that was really fun andit was great to be a part of,
but it was short term.
Again.
It's just like it's one-sidedand it's beautiful because, like
, I feel so good leaving, butwhen you're looking at
developing your platform, thatcan be really good and
gratifying for you, but it's notgoing to get the long-term
goals done that you might belooking to do.
(22:51):
So volunteering is a beautifulthing.
It builds empathy.
It builds your exposure to alot of community issues.
So if you don't know whatyou're super passionate about
and you're really at the startof trying to develop a platform
yourself and pick a cause,volunteering is going to be a
great place to start, becauseyou're going to get exposed to
all of these different beautifulplaces for you to provide value
(23:15):
to in the long run.
It also shows that you'rewilling to do the work, which is
huge.
But, as I said, volunteering isoften one-sided You're giving
but you're not necessarilygrowing a sustainable
relationship.
You have very little to no sayin any decision-making or any
visibility, and it rarelyconnects you to your long-term
goals unless you are superintentional about it.
(23:37):
So volunteering, obviously, ishow I started and I still love
being in those boots on theground moments.
But you realize over time thatto make a long-term impact and
to build something that lastsway beyond your title year, you
need to think more strategically.
And that's where partnershipscome in.
Partnerships are about mutualbenefit, so you bring value and
(24:00):
you receive value.
So it's more than just showingup, it's about collaborating.
So a true partnership mightinclude some shared visibility,
so you highlight their work toyour audience and then they
spotlight your initiativethrough their channels as well.
They may provide some resourceslike materials.
They may provide platforms foryou to speak on Funding may be a
(24:22):
part of that partnership, andeven mentorship.
And then you provide yourinfluence as a title holder,
which comes with a lot ofinfluence.
You provide your expertise,especially if you come from a
space of lived experience orit's a career goal of yours, or
maybe you have a degree in thatarea or event support.
(24:43):
So planning and implementationthere should be some level of
strategic alignment inpartnership, so your mission
obviously needs to align withtheirs and so that working
together is going to strengthenboth brands.
And then, of course, thereputation building is mutual.
Being connected to any credibleorganization is going to boost
(25:04):
your professional image andtheirs.
And this is something that Italk about in terms of
leadership skills that you bringto the table as a title holder.
If you can show that you knowhow to build partnerships and
work in collaboration for themutual benefit of both parties,
that really shows sincereleadership skills and that
you've got a lot of thought andstrategy that goes into your
(25:28):
mission.
So when I started approachingorganizations, I really had this
plan that I didn't just want toserve, but I wanted to partner,
and it changed everything.
So I wasn't all of a sudden, Iwasn't just a volunteer in the
background, I was literally ontheir website, I was on their
panels, I was in strategymeetings and then those
(25:49):
relationships developed intomore long-term relationships and
many of them, like I said, ledinto career opportunities.
It also just developed myability to network and to be
creative about how I could helpothers and how maybe they would
be able to support my mission aswell, which is a really cool
(26:12):
thing that you will find, as atitle holder, when you're
finally able to be able toarticulate the things that you
are passionate about and reallylisten to what they're doing and
be able to get creative aboutlike, oh my gosh, like I would
love to be a part of that.
How can I help?
Like here's something that Icould bring to the table.
Is that something you'd beinterested in?
(26:33):
My support on?
It goes just so much beyondlike coming to a 5k run walk and
handing out water and bananas.
It goes into like how can Iactually better your
organization and further ourcohesive missions together, and
there's so much excitement thatcomes with that.
So, as a title holder, this isreally important because you
(26:57):
will have a limited window tocreate impact.
You have 365 days with thattitle and let me just also say
like it should go beyond that.
But with that title and theinfluence that comes with that
name across your chest and thatcrown on your head, you have a
limited window.
So partnerships are going tohelp you build efficiency so you
(27:21):
get more done with that supportand that collaboration.
It's going to build yourvisibility so you get in front
of audiences and decision makers.
It will build your credibilityso that you're taken more
seriously when you show up witha plan, and it builds longevity
so the relationship can outlastyour title year and open up
doors way down the road.
(27:41):
So this is what I mean when I'mencouraging all of you to focus
on the big picture.
When you build the rightpartnerships, you are not just
serving your community, you'rebuilding your future network,
your resume and your reputation,and that is a powerful return
on something that you alreadycare so deeply about and it's
(28:01):
the foundation for lastinginfluence.
So some just like basic examplehere of partnerships.
Let's look at the Miss Americaorganization.
When I was competing, the MissAmerica organization was
partnered with the Children'sMiracle Network Hospital.
Some of the benefits of thatpartnership included
opportunities for title holdersto go in and be a part of a
(28:24):
young child's life and help themfeel good and for them to like
make that child's day and be apart of something that is so
much bigger than themselves,like just going to the hospital
and visiting like.
I have some of the mostbeautiful memories as Miss
Wisconsin and as a local titleholder, of the most beautiful
(28:44):
memories as Miss Wisconsin andas a local title holder.
But there's one memory as MissWisconsin that I went to the
Children's Miracle NetworkHospital in my community that I
grew up in and I remember likethis little girl just loved Star
Wars and she had put on a DarthVader helmet and we were
(29:04):
playing like Star Wars togetherand we were having like what is
it called?
The swords my God forgive me, Iactually haven't really seen
all the Star Wars movies, butthe laser sword things, like I
have pictures of that and it wasjust so much fun and it just
like it was an opportunity forus as title holders to help
(29:25):
these kids get distracted fromwhatever like pain or illness
they were experiencing at thetime, and so that that was
really powerful for us and itwas beneficial for the families
that our crowns on showing thatsupport.
(29:51):
And we also did a lot offundraising for Children's
Miracle Network Hospitals.
The fundraising that we did inpart supported Miss America
through the scholarship funds,but it also was divvied up
between that and Children'sMiracle Network Hospital.
So there was just there was alot of mutual benefit between
that partnership.
And now the Miss Americaorganization, as you know, is
(30:13):
partnered with the AmericanHeart Association and the Go Red
for Women.
That's mutually beneficialbecause it is creating exposure
for both organizations.
They have very similar missionsin the health of women and
educating women on their healthand wellness and with America
launching like the fitnessportion of competition in
(30:36):
partnership then with RebelAthletic, it just it all kind of
comes together and you can kindof come to your own conclusions
as well about the mutualbenefits of that partnership.
So that's like, if you'relooking at these larger
organizations, you will findpartnerships like that in a lot
of different spaces, and so itmakes sense then for you with
(30:58):
your platform to also have someof these partnerships, have some
of these partnerships.
So one of my partnerships that Ihad as Miss Wisconsin and
through my initiative Tyler'sLegacy the Impact of Substance
Abuse on the Family was with theRed Ribbon Campaign.
Red Ribbon Week is celebratedannually in October, and so they
highlight the importance ofliving a drug-free life.
(31:20):
So I was able to partner withthem and use a lot of their
resources and materials, takingthat into schools and speaking
with students about that, andthen, in turn, they also
promoted me as Miss Wisconsin inthe program that I was doing,
so that I had a larger reach atthe same time.
So that was one of manypartnerships that I had as well
throughout my experience as atitle holder, but it was
(31:44):
creative too.
It was just one of those thingswhere I just did a Google
search and I was like what aresome of these organizations that
are doing the things alreadythat I also want to be doing and
how can I support them inpromoting their mission and
their messaging and how can theyalso support me and the goals
that I have?
So that leads into then how doyou develop a strategic
(32:06):
partnership?
We already know how importantpartnerships are, so how in the
world do we even get started?
How do we build an intentional,service-based business plan as
a title holder?
So let's break it down.
The first thing that you have todo is clarify what your goals
are.
What are your professionalgoals?
What career paths are youexploring?
(32:27):
So, for me, I loved publicspeaking and I knew that the
more public speaking experiencethat I could gain through my
initiative and throughpartnerships, that would develop
opportunities for me topotentially be a public speaker
professionally in my career.
That was one area.
The other area area, too, wasthat I wanted to get into
nonprofit development and soworking with other organizations
(32:50):
that, aligned with my mission,would give me more experience in
understanding how nonprofitswork and what opportunities
there might be career-wise forme in those nonprofits.
What are your personal goals?
That is like what causesgenuinely light you up, what
causes genuinely fill you withthis sense of purpose and
(33:10):
inspiration and energy?
That is something that thatgoes back to truly like.
What is your platform ingeneral, but personally, when
you are looking throughdifferent organizations maybe
community-based, state-based ornationally and looking through
their mission and the work thatthey're doing, what's getting
(33:30):
you excited?
What about those specific keycomponents of those
organizations are making youinterested in getting involved.
That's something reallyimportant to think about.
Your strategic partnershipsshould not just be strategy for
this outcome of you know,looking really good in front of
(33:51):
the judges or buildingcredibility.
No, it also needs to be thatyou genuinely appreciate what
that organization is doing.
And then, finally, what areyour service goals?
What kind of community impactdo you want to make, and make
sure that that lines up with theorganization as well?
So for the Red Ribbon campaign,for example, one of their main
goals was to educate students,and they wanted to do that
(34:12):
through evidence-basedcurriculum.
And so for me to be, and theywanted to do that through
evidence-based curriculum, andso for me to be able to use a
lot of that evidence-basedcurriculum and my own messaging
and lived experience thatelevated the community impact
that I wanted to make.
Next, you want to identify yourvalue.
What do you bring to the table?
What skills, what audience,what story, what visibility do
(34:36):
you bring?
Okay, and this is, I think,where it gets a little bit
tricky this is where we may havesome of that imposter syndrome
start to sneak in, because it'sa little more difficult for us
to look internally and be likewhat makes me awesome, but it is
an important step to this,because anytime that you're
going into an interview, whetherthat's a pageant interview or a
(34:57):
job interview you need to knowwhat you're bringing to the
table that will benefit thatorganization.
Okay, so, for example, is itpublic speaking?
For me, that was a big part ofit.
I loved public speaking.
I had a unique story, which isanother value that I brought to
the table.
Speaking, I had a unique story,which is another value that I
brought to the table, and I alsohad a lot of ability to support
different events, to supportfundraising.
(35:19):
I had a little bit more well,not as much back then because
social media was just kind ofstarting to flourish, but for
you, like, that value that youmay bring to the table is your
social media reach through yourtitle holder and personal pages
as well.
So get creative and startasking to the people that know
you most like.
What would you think issomething that I provide, could
(35:40):
provide to an organizationthat's really valuable?
Could be organization skills,could be creativity, could be,
again, your unique story.
There's a lot of differentthings that you can bring to the
table as value that you need tojust uncover for yourself.
Next, and this is probably oneof the more difficult areas as
well is you actually have toinitiate the conversation.
(36:01):
You'd have to do the outreach,you have to email, you have to
send the DMs, you have to do thein-person networking.
So that, I think, is one bighump that I know from experience
working with my clients isreally difficult to do.
Is that just general outreach?
But here's my advice to you youhave to keep it simple, you
guys, just keep it so simple.
(36:22):
Don't overthink it.
It doesn't have to be thisperfectly concocted email or
message.
It's simple.
Here's who I am, here's what Ido, here's why I love the
mission of your organization.
Do you have time to meet totalk about the ways I might be
able to support your efforts?
Okay, you already haveidentified your value, you know
what your goals are, but now wejust have to start the
(36:44):
conversation.
Don't overcomplicate it.
Just lead with your honesty andlead with clarity.
So I have a really awesomeexample of this happening for a
client recently that you know.
We were talking about just this.
We had a whole hour longconversation where we were
talking about what are yourgoals for being a state title
holder?
What does it actually look likewhat's the big picture and
let's start developing yourbusiness plan.
(37:05):
So you've got that lined up andready to go.
And so we started talking aboutpartnerships and started doing
some research together and foundan organization based in her
state.
That was like truly ideal.
That was like the mission linesup.
This is perfect, Like I wouldbe able to support them in this
way, this way and this way, andthey would be able to support me
.
But she didn't have any of thatlike clearly lined out or like
(37:26):
how do I pitch that to them?
And I was like just reach outand see what happens.
And so a few days later, shetexted me.
I was like I'm so excited.
I just got off a call with them.
They have a million differentideas for ways that they want to
get me involved.
They're so excited about theexpertise that I bring to the
table and the work that I'vealready done, and here's how
they're going to support me.
And it's just going to beamazing.
(37:48):
And I was like, look, the otheraspect of this is you've been
talking about how you want tobranch out in your career and
maybe this is an opportunity foryou to do that is to work with
an organization just like this,and they have the connections.
So it was just like this huge,incredible win and all it was
you guys was it just took hersitting down and writing an
(38:10):
email and they got back to herand they were just super
thrilled.
Now, don't take it personally ifthey don't get back to you
right away.
Don't take it personally ifthey don't get back to you at
all.
I worked in nonprofit.
It's crazy.
You wear a lot of hats innonprofit and they don't always
have time for every person thatreaches out to them with
something like this.
So don't take it personally.
Do follow up a couple of times.
(38:32):
Three times is the charm, butdon't take it personally.
It's not about you if theydon't respond.
And finally, there's a mindsetpiece to all of this as well.
I've been talking a little bitabout imposter syndrome
throughout this, but there'salso, like the first time,
nerves, like this fear of who amI to do this, who am I to think
(38:53):
that I have anything that I cancontribute to this larger
organization, that feeling oflike you know I have never done
this before.
I don't quite know what I'mdoing, I don't really have a
clear idea of what they mightwant from me Like I can't come
to the table and be like this ismy plan, that's okay.
Like don't go to the table witha plan, because you know they
(39:14):
are an organization that'salready doing their own thing
and they have their objectivesand they have their business
plan and their goals for theyear.
So they've already got all ofthis.
Go in with an open mind and seehow you might be able to
contribute to their missionthat's already lined up, and see
what comes of it, and you mightexperience one of the most
beautiful conversations andleave with a new sense of
(39:37):
overwhelm of not, it's no longerwho am I to do this, but now
it's.
Oh my gosh, how am I going todo all of this?
Because they gave me so manyopportunities.
It's a whole new level ofexcitement and nerves.
So everything that you've everdone before was something that
you never did before.
That Okay.
So everything is you've everdone before was something that
you never did before.
That Okay.
(39:57):
So everything is always goingto be new.
You have to reframe yourmindset about this, that you're
not trying to be perfect.
You're just going to show upprepared and passionate.
That's all that you can do.
Just put yourself out there.
It's kind of like dating andlike meeting someone for the
first time.
You really don't know what toexpect, but you can go in with
these intentions, like I'm justgonna be myself, and they can
take it or leave it Kind of thesame concept.
(40:20):
Finally, we have to remember thelong-term vision, the big
picture Beyond your reign.
What are you really building?
Okay, you are building yournetwork.
This is potential future jobleads.
I got all of my jobs fromnetworking.
(40:40):
Truly like every single jobthat I held after college was
from networking.
My first clients that I had onboard in Fearlessly Authentic
were ones that I had knownalready, and so much of our
success starts from our closecircle of people that we already
(41:02):
know.
So, build your network.
It's your future job leads,it's references for future jobs,
it's potential mentors and it'scollaborators.
Your service will equate to theexperience that makes your
resume shine above and beyondanybody else's.
So the more that you do, themore that you gain.
(41:25):
Your initiative is a way toprove consistency and leadership
skills.
So the more that you are ableto put yourself out there and be
consistent with the work thatyou're doing in your platform
and developing it and letting itgrow in beautiful ways.
You are proving that you havethe ability to consistently grow
and to lead something biggerthan yourself.
(41:46):
So, as a reminder and I thinkthis is hard because sometimes
this just happens, it did for mefor a little while.
It wasn't a completeabandonment, but try not to
build a platform that you'regoing to abandon.
The second your title ends.
It is something that can growwith you if it's built
(42:08):
authentically.
I know that that's somethingthat happened with mine.
Eventually, like with bothplatforms, with Tyler's Legacy
and with Empowering Women I meanso much of that has influenced
who I am today and the work thatI do with my clients every
single day.
Mine is obviously a very uniqueexperience because I'm
literally taking the experiencesthat I had as a title holder
(42:29):
and coaching my clients to dosimilar things with their
experiences as title holders.
But your work that you do withyour platform can continue
growing and expanding and cangrow with you, as long as you're
doing it in a way that is trueto yourself.
So with that let's wrap this up,because there's a lot for you
(42:51):
to process after thisconversation.
So here are the key takeawaysService with strategy will
culminate in sustainable impact,long-term sustainable impact.
Let it grow naturally,organically.
Okay, don't force anything.
Just do things because theyfeel good, they feel right and
(43:13):
you feel passionate about andyou're energized to do that.
Focus on your alignment withother organizations that you're
looking to partner with, or withthe work that you're doing and
your plan that you're developingfor your platform, over the
impressiveness.
Do not develop a platform orengage in partnerships just to
(43:35):
look impressive on the outside.
It's going to burn you outevery single time.
Do it because you love it andlet your consistency speak for
itself.
We're not trying to proveanything.
We're not trying to, like, makeourselves look awesome.
Do it because you truly, trulylove it, and the rest is going
to fall in line.
So here's my encouragement foryou Again, as you're processing
(43:59):
this load of information thatI've thrown at you, is that you
do not need to have it allfigured out, you guys.
You just have to get started,and get started with something
that matters the most to you.
Okay, so with that, if youwouldn't mind, I would really,
really love if you would connectwith me and share your platform
on Instagram or in the Sash andSoul community.
(44:22):
One of my favorite parts ofwhat I do is learning about your
unique passion and the thingsthat you are doing to change the
world.
So tag Sash and Soul with thishashtag hashtag
SashSuccessStories because welove alliteration and let's
celebrate your wins together.
Let's build this community ofwomen that are out there doing
(44:45):
things because they love it,because it energizes them and
building these really beautifulpartnerships that are truly
going to change the world andcreate a positive impact.
So tag Sash and Soul it's atSash and Soul and use the
hashtag SashSuccessStories sothat I can share the amazing
work that you're doing and I canget inspired by you as well.
(45:05):
All right With that.
April's masterclass is ondeveloping your platform, so you
don't want to miss that.
It's on Tuesday, april 29th,from 7 to 8 pm Central Time, and
you are able to register forthat for free.
Registration is now open, socheck out the link in the show
description or you can DM me onInstagram at Sash and Soul.
We're going to talk a lot moreabout where to get started with
(45:27):
your platform, developing yourplan, and how to articulate your
mission, your vision and yourkey message to the judges and
your community.
All right, you guys, with that.
I am excited to go on vacation,so I'm gonna wrap this up and
get all my work done so that Ican officially dive into
(45:48):
vacation mode and I will chatwith you again next week.
Bye.
Hey you guys, welcome back to Sash and Soul.
I hope this episode finds youfabulous and thriving.
This week I'm pretty good.
This week I'm excited we areheading to, actually, you know,
as this episode launches, wewill be in Virginia Beach
visiting my mom and my stepdad,and looking forward to it.
(00:21):
They have been living like awayfrom us out of state for a few
years now and this will be thefirst time that we will go and
visit them for a long weekend,and so looking forward to it.
Unfortunately, my mom had a bitof an accident last week so
she's been using a scooterbecause she can't put any weight
on her ankle, so that'll put alittle bit of a damper on things
(00:44):
.
But also like we're really laidback and we're just going to,
you know kind of bum around andtake our time exploring Virginia
Beach and enjoying a little bitwarmer weather than what we're
experiencing here in Wisconsin.
It's been a little chilly,It'll be in like 40s and 50s
(01:06):
here at home and then inVirginia Beach I guess it's
going to be like 60s and sunnyfor the most part, I think.
So not as warm as it would be,you know, as we'd like it to be,
but it is what it is, so we'regoing to make the most of it.
It'll be just nice to get awayand not really have anything
that we have to do, but just beable to relax and spend some
quality time.
So we're looking forward tothat.
But yeah, outside of that, it'sthings are, things are.
(01:34):
It's an exciting time for youguys.
We've got orientations galoreand I, you know, contestant
numbers.
My clients are texting me withtheir contestant numbers.
I had one actually reach out tome over the weekend.
She's like I'm so glad that youdid that Sash and Soul episode
about contestant numbers and whythey don't matter, because
guess who's number one and y'allI get it.
I remember, I remember thestress of that and I do want to
(01:55):
just touch on that really quickbecause I had a thought that I
don't think I really talkedabout in that episode that I
have been communicating with myclients and in that episode I
talk about how contested numbersdon't matter.
The judges are going to findyou wherever you're at.
But I just I want to take amoment to acknowledge I
(02:16):
understand and I remember thekind of the strategy behind
choosing a contested number whenit came to the time of day that
you were going to interview, orwhat preliminary night you were
going to do talent versusonstage question versus evening
gown versus fitness and I justwanted to like, really quick,
like, do just a little bit of anappendix to the episode on
contestant numbers and why theydon't matter, because I do
(02:39):
remember that being a part of mydecision making.
But it was really just abouthow I was going to show up and
perform during those times, likeif I interviewed better in the
morning versus the afternoon, orif I wanted to get my talent
done earlier in the week versuslater.
It was more about that than itwas about my chances of winning
a preliminary award or whetheror not the judges would notice
(02:59):
me in that spot.
So I just wanted to like,really quickly, just do a bit of
an edit in addition to thatepisode, because I know that
y'all are in the throes of thattoo.
But if that's where you're at,where you've been doing
contestant lotteries, and youmight be a little bit nervous
about your contestant number,like definitely I want to refer
you back to that episode becauseit can be, I think, a healthy
(03:20):
and helpful perspective for youas you continue your mental
preparation for competition.
But speaking of preparation.
Today we're actually going tobe talking about preparing to be
the title holder.
So I know we often focus somuch time and energy on
preparing for the competitionitself practicing your walk,
(03:42):
practicing your talent,practicing interview, how you're
going to show up and presentyourself as the best possible
candidate for that job for theyear.
But I think what often we tendto kind of set on the back
burner is looking at what doesthe entire year of the title
holder actually look like?
What does it mean to do the job?
(04:03):
Do you have a realistic jobpreview of being the state title
holder?
And I really am likespecifically speaking about
those of you that are preparingfor, like, an MAO or USA state
title that would take you on tothe national level, because I
know a lot of that is ramping upfor this spring.
So that's really what I'mfocusing on, and also it just
(04:23):
comes from my personalexperience of having been a
state title holder in MissAmerica that I want to speak on
that and speak on what my MAOclients are going through right
now in preparation not just forthe competition but for the
entire year as a title holder,and I really push that a lot.
You'll often hear me say what'syour big picture?
Are you focusing on the bigpicture?
(04:44):
Are you clear on your bigpicture?
If you can stay focused on yourwhy why you're doing this, what
your plan is, what your goalsare that will help eliminate
some of this noise that oftengets in the way and causes a lot
of mindset glitches andsetbacks in terms of your
mentality going into acompetition.
So, focusing on the big picturetoday and specifically about
(05:08):
building your service initiativein strategic partnerships as a
title holder.
So we're not just talking aboutchoosing a platform topic and
starting to develop that andwriting your paper on that for
the judges to read.
Now we're talking about whatare you actually doing with it?
And we're graduating beyondjust the volunteer side of
(05:28):
things and going into how do youdevelop this as a program and
implement this for 365 daysthroughout an entire state and
then also bring this to anational stage and present it as
a project that you would wantto implement throughout your
entire year as a national titleholder.
(05:49):
So that's what we're talkingabout today.
If you want a little bit morehistory on my service
initiatives and developing aplatform from my unique
perspective and my experiencesperspective and my experiences.
I'm going to refer you back toepisode number 16, service
(06:10):
Initiatives and Developing aPlatform, where I go into depth
about how I chose my platformand how it evolved throughout
the years, and not only how itevolved, but how I kind of
pivoted and completely switchedmy platform, kind of in the
middle of my competition years,and I talk a lot about why
that's okay and really promotethat you choose a platform that
makes sense for you, for who youare, what you're passionate
(06:31):
about, what your goals are andthe thing that's going to
motivate you and energize you,not just deplete you, which is
often, I think, what we tend todo when we're trying to be
impressive.
So, as a reminder, as we divein your platform, your service
(06:52):
initiative, your program is notabout being impressive.
I hear that a lot like what arethe judges going to think of
this and is it going totranslate well?
Is it going to score well?
That's not what this is about.
It's about doing what you love,consistently and very
intentionally.
So we're going to keep that inmind kind of as a theme around
(07:14):
this entire episode.
So let's dive into this.
How do we shape our passioninto purpose, shape our passion
into purpose.
So how your platform is shapedis really going to influence the
(07:39):
way that you show up and it'sshaping who you are and it's
really kind of a core piece ofyour brand.
It's not your entire brand ever.
I don't ever advocate for yougoing into interview and just
talking about your platform,because you are so much more
than that but it's certainlygoing to shape you in many ways
and how you show up.
So my personal platform I'm justgoing to dive in really quick
to a brief overview.
(07:59):
It started because I lost mybrother, tyler, to a
methamphetamine addiction butultimately he died by suicide in
2005.
I was 15 years old and at thattime I already knew that I was
going to compete in Miss America.
We didn't have the teen programyet, so I was going to compete.
I was a Miss when I waseligible at 17.
And that tragedy, thatexperience, really shaped my
(08:23):
drive.
And it came a lot from my momwho was already very much diving
into how we could impact thelives of others in a positive
way through our tragedy.
So she was already creatingpositive change through this
very tragic loss that weexperienced.
So that was one of myinspirations, was her work, but
(08:46):
also knowing that the MissAmerica organization was going
to give me this platform to havea larger voice and a larger
impact throughout my community,I knew that that was going to be
my platform.
So for me it was.
I don't want to call it an easydecision, it was just one of
those things that was an obviouschoice.
I'll call it obvious, not easy,because it was not easy talking
(09:06):
about it, but it was anopportunity for me to gain some
power in what really depleted meand broke me in so many ways.
So it was my way of buildingthat power back in so many ways.
So it was my way of likebuilding that power back.
(09:27):
So it was an obvious choice forme to use the platform of the
Miss America organization as anopportunity to make change
through the tragedy that we hadexperienced.
And I did that for a few yearsuntil I burnt out because, as
you could imagine and I hope youdon't know from personal
experience, I would never wishthat on anyone but if you could
imagine how exhausting thatwould be to continue talking
(09:47):
about this, this trauma, thisloss that you had experienced.
And so I got to a point where Iwas pretty burnt out on that
and my mom encouraged me to justset it down for a while, if not
forever, that I didn't have tokeep trying to change the world,
that I needed to also putmyself first and take care of
myself.
And at that point she had alsodone the same because she had
(10:08):
five kids at home yet that sheneeded to take care of in a
business that she was trying torun, and so she had already made
that choice for herself, and soit was very encouraging for me
to make a healthy choice formyself in the same way.
And at the time I was in school,I was taking a lot of women and
gender studies courses and Ihad always been the girl that
was like I'm just as strong asthe boys and I'll arm wrestle
(10:31):
you and let's play 500 out inrecess, and, like you know just
a little, I wouldn't call myselfa tomboy, but I was definitely
like I'm powerful just as muchas the boys are, just as much as
the boys are.
And so the women in genderstudies classes just were like
(10:52):
they were my jam.
I dove deep into them, and so,after being part of the Miss
America organization for a fewyears and also having this
experience and just this naturalpassion for empowering women
and kind of feminism, I decidedto switch my platform to
empowering women mind, body andsoul.
And that's when I launched anonprofit and I was raising
scholarship money for youngwomen and running events and
(11:13):
working with other women-basedorganizations locally and just
kind of reset myself.
But then a couple of yearslater I really decided, like for
my heart, for my big picturefor the long term, of like who I
was and what I really wanted tobe doing with this opportunity,
(11:34):
especially if I was going towin Miss Wisconsin and take it
to a national stage.
I needed to go back to my rootsof where it all started, and so
I relaunched my platform oftalking about my brother.
It was Tyler's Legacy, theimpact of substance use on the
family, and it was the years ofexperience of like the first
couple of years of developingthis initial platform to
(11:55):
launching a brand new platformand having different experiences
and skills and opportunitieswith that.
That I think really led me intohaving a clearer vision for
what I wanted to get done withmy platform overall, and so I
think all of that culminatedinto what I was able to do and
the impact I was able to makethrough my final platform in the
(12:18):
Miss America organization.
So what I learned from workingon my platform I mean all the
things right, the typical thingsthat you hear like I developed
confidence.
I obviously like developed aclearer direction as I went
along and, I think, reallyimportantly, I developed this
clarity of my own voice.
(12:40):
Oftentimes I hear clientstalking about wanting to know
who they are and be able toarticulate their stories.
In fact, I was just having aconversation with a client this
week who was speaking to anoutgoing title holder.
That was, like you know, somuch of this is just about the
stories that I share and theconnections that I can make
through stories, and my clientwas all of a sudden anxious
(13:00):
about like oh my gosh, what aremy stories?
What do I talk about?
Like I have to think of thestories that I need to share
that will make these connections, and I'm going to argue that
that's the reverse approach.
You want to actually reversethat and go the other way around
of actually like buildingconnections first, because
stories are going to come withthose connections.
(13:22):
Like I think back to all thetimes that I had opportunities
to speak publicly and all thetimes that I had opportunities
to speak as part of a like apanelist at an event, like as an
expert or lived experiencepanelist, and you know anytime
that you're having opportunitiesto answer somebody's questions
(13:43):
after you kind of give yourpresentation.
That's when more stories comeout, especially if you are
genuinely answering thesequestions from your heart and
from a conversational approach.
These stories are going to comefrom the connections that you
make, so the more that you talkwith your audiences, the clearer
your message gets.
So the bottom line is you justhave to get started.
(14:06):
You just get started somewhere.
Now, as my stories developed,my platform got clearer, my
messaging got clearer.
I have developed this clarityof voice.
All of this work, then, isgoing to culminate and translate
into real world opportunities.
Okay, so you start with yourpassion, with your platform that
(14:30):
you've decided on, and you juststart doing stuff.
Get out there, start speaking,volunteer at events, and All of
these things that you are doingthroughout your years of service
are going to culminate intobuilding your resume through
these speaking engagements andall these other opportunities
(14:52):
that you're going to have.
For me, my experiencesdeveloping my platform and the
opportunities that I had totravel and to work with
different organizations and tomeet different people,
culminated in my professionalcareer, so actually one of my
job.
My second job out of collegeokay, let me rewind.
(15:14):
My first job quote unquote outof college was Miss Wisconsin
and then after that I worked fora nonprofit food bank here in
Milwaukee doing communityoutreach.
I got that job through anappearance as Miss Wisconsin and
then, when I wanted to diveback into more of the behavioral
(15:38):
health, addiction treatment,advocacy side of mental health
and addiction, I reached out tosome of the contacts that I had
made through the work that I haddone through my platform and
that is how I got my next jobdoing business development for a
nonprofit treatment center foraddiction.
And so all of these experiencesand the more that I put myself
(16:01):
out there really led to theselong-term successes.
And now today, obviously youknow I have a coaching business.
This is what I do full-time.
The more that I put myself outthere really led to these
long-term successes.
And now today, obviously youknow I have a coaching business.
This is what I do full-time,and I'm able to take those
experiences and pour them backinto the context of what I'm
coaching, into the lessons thatI develop and the curriculum.
So all of this to say, bringingit back to you.
(16:22):
I know that so many of you aregraduating from college and you
may be looking for a job rightnow and putting your resume out
there a lot.
Actually, one of my interns isin this space right now where
she's graduating, and it is verystressful.
I remember everyone asking you,from professors to friends, to
family members, to acquaintanceswhat are you going to do after
(16:44):
graduation?
Do you have a job yet?
And it's so stressful becauseyou already have that internal
pressure and all the fears andmaybe some imposter syndrome
going on of like what's the nextstep.
And then all this external,what seems like pressure of
people asking because they'regenuinely curious, but it's just
coming from everywhere.
I also remember being really,really overwhelmed by job
(17:11):
descriptions because I was likegosh, like I don't know, like I
went to school for you know howmany years and I have my degree
and like that's I mean the basicthing that you need for an
entry level position.
But all these job descriptionsare so like I don't know they
get.
They feel overwhelming becausethey're like I don't know.
They feel overwhelming becausethey're like I don't know if I
know how to do that and likethat's so specific, I've never
done that before and so, likethe imposter syndrome comes up.
(17:32):
But it's the skills that youlearn outside of the classroom
that prepares you for theprofessional world and that's
where being in pageantry anddoing your service work actually
gives you a leg up.
And so I want to encourage youto lean into that understanding
that the more that you do withyour platform within reason,
don't burn yourself out but themore that you do with your
(17:53):
platform leads to personal andprofessional growth, leads to
those resume builders and Ithink I mean it's hard to put
that into context when youhaven't worked in like a career
set, like in a professionalspace yet to like understand how
to be creative with your resumeand to look at your experiences
(18:13):
creatively and like I don'twant to say spin them, but
associate them with the thingsthat you're seeing on those job
descriptions of like okay, howdoes this experience that I had
translate into a skill thattranslates into this particular
piece of this role that I'mlooking at applying for?
(18:35):
So, as we go into more of thisconversation about building
partnerships with yourinitiative and being strategic,
keep that in mind that the morethat you're doing outside of the
classroom, the more you willdevelop your confidence and the
more that you're going todevelop that professional
(18:56):
experience that you can add toyour resume and that can help
ease some of the impostersyndrome that you might be
feeling and the fear that you'renot actually qualified for some
of these positions, because Iwould bet money that you are way
more qualified than youactually think that you are.
So your platform is really thefoundation for your professional
(19:16):
identity.
It is not just a pageant thing,especially if you have been
able to find a passion inservice that is somehow related
to what you want to doprofessionally and long-term,
and I understand that that's notalways the case.
We have let's look at MissAmerica 2024, madison Marsh that
(19:40):
her career is in the Air Forceand in aviation and her platform
is about, you know, her motherand running a nonprofit that
supports cancer research andresources, so definitely
disconnected from her career,but still like again, if we're
(20:01):
staying creative about this likestill adding those skills that
she'll be able to use inwhatever career field she
decides to go into.
And so I just want to pointthat out that just because it
may not be specificallyconnected doesn't mean that it
isn't going to benefit you inthe long run, but I am going to
talk quite a bit about how yourwork and your networking within
(20:22):
your platform can aid you inyour professional career today.
All right, so let's talk aboutpartnerships.
Partnerships is a thing that Italk about a lot with my clients
, especially as we are going tothe next level of developing
their platform.
So we're going to talk aboutwhy partnerships are important
and how they different from justvolunteering, because there is
a very clear difference betweenthose two.
(20:43):
Volunteering is simply givingof your time and energy, which
is very important, but considerhow one sided that is.
You show up at an event, yougive of your time, you give of
your energy, and then you leaveand maybe you'll take some
pictures for social media, whichis great like develops, like
(21:03):
your exposure, and showcases alot of what you value and
encourages other people to getinvolved as well.
So in that way, you know it'shelpful for you, but for the
most part, it's quite one sided.
When we're looking at actuallydeveloping and expanding your
mission, a partnership providesmutual value and it provides
(21:25):
visibility for both sides and itcan provide resources.
So let's dive into volunteeringa little bit more.
Volunteering, of course, iswhere many pageant women are
going to start.
It's where many of us startright.
I was in National Honor Societyin high school and I had the
required service hours that Ineeded to finish and I
(21:47):
volunteered through church andall these other things too.
So it is a really beautifulplace to begin because it gets
your foot in the door of knowingwhat it means to be of service
to other people.
You're donating your time,you're donating your presence
and you're donating your energyto a specific cause or
organization.
Volunteering is very oftenevent-based and it's short-term
(22:08):
and it's task-focused.
For example, this last weekend,my husband and I volunteered
our time for an organizationthat I feel very close to.
A very dear friend of mine runsit.
It's called Bereaved Togetherand it supports mothers that
have lost their children, and sothey have a Bereaved Mother's
Day conference coming up and wewere helping them prep for that,
(22:31):
and so that was really fun andit was great to be a part of,
but it was short term.
Again.
It's just like it's one-sidedand it's beautiful because, like
, I feel so good leaving, butwhen you're looking at
developing your platform, thatcan be really good and
gratifying for you, but it's notgoing to get the long-term
goals done that you might belooking to do.
(22:51):
So volunteering is a beautifulthing.
It builds empathy.
It builds your exposure to alot of community issues.
So if you don't know whatyou're super passionate about
and you're really at the startof trying to develop a platform
yourself and pick a cause,volunteering is going to be a
great place to start, becauseyou're going to get exposed to
all of these different beautifulplaces for you to provide value
(23:15):
to in the long run.
It also shows that you'rewilling to do the work, which is
huge.
But, as I said, volunteering isoften one-sided You're giving
but you're not necessarilygrowing a sustainable
relationship.
You have very little to no sayin any decision-making or any
visibility, and it rarelyconnects you to your long-term
goals unless you are superintentional about it.
(23:37):
So volunteering, obviously, ishow I started and I still love
being in those boots on theground moments.
But you realize over time thatto make a long-term impact and
to build something that lastsway beyond your title year, you
need to think more strategically.
And that's where partnershipscome in.
Partnerships are about mutualbenefit, so you bring value and
(24:00):
you receive value.
So it's more than just showingup, it's about collaborating.
So a true partnership mightinclude some shared visibility,
so you highlight their work toyour audience and then they
spotlight your initiativethrough their channels as well.
They may provide some resourceslike materials.
They may provide platforms foryou to speak on Funding may be a
(24:22):
part of that partnership, andeven mentorship.
And then you provide yourinfluence as a title holder,
which comes with a lot ofinfluence.
You provide your expertise,especially if you come from a
space of lived experience orit's a career goal of yours, or
maybe you have a degree in thatarea or event support.
(24:43):
So planning and implementationthere should be some level of
strategic alignment inpartnership, so your mission
obviously needs to align withtheirs and so that working
together is going to strengthenboth brands.
And then, of course, thereputation building is mutual.
Being connected to any credibleorganization is going to boost
(25:04):
your professional image andtheirs.
And this is something that Italk about in terms of
leadership skills that you bringto the table as a title holder.
If you can show that you knowhow to build partnerships and
work in collaboration for themutual benefit of both parties,
that really shows sincereleadership skills and that
you've got a lot of thought andstrategy that goes into your
(25:28):
mission.
So when I started approachingorganizations, I really had this
plan that I didn't just want toserve, but I wanted to partner,
and it changed everything.
So I wasn't all of a sudden, Iwasn't just a volunteer in the
background, I was literally ontheir website, I was on their
panels, I was in strategymeetings and then those
(25:49):
relationships developed intomore long-term relationships and
many of them, like I said, ledinto career opportunities.
It also just developed myability to network and to be
creative about how I could helpothers and how maybe they would
be able to support my mission aswell, which is a really cool
(26:12):
thing that you will find, as atitle holder, when you're
finally able to be able toarticulate the things that you
are passionate about and reallylisten to what they're doing and
be able to get creative aboutlike, oh my gosh, like I would
love to be a part of that.
How can I help?
Like here's something that Icould bring to the table.
Is that something you'd beinterested in?
(26:33):
My support on?
It goes just so much beyondlike coming to a 5k run walk and
handing out water and bananas.
It goes into like how can Iactually better your
organization and further ourcohesive missions together, and
there's so much excitement thatcomes with that.
So, as a title holder, this isreally important because you
(26:57):
will have a limited window tocreate impact.
You have 365 days with thattitle and let me just also say
like it should go beyond that.
But with that title and theinfluence that comes with that
name across your chest and thatcrown on your head, you have a
limited window.
So partnerships are going tohelp you build efficiency so you
(27:21):
get more done with that supportand that collaboration.
It's going to build yourvisibility so you get in front
of audiences and decision makers.
It will build your credibilityso that you're taken more
seriously when you show up witha plan, and it builds longevity
so the relationship can outlastyour title year and open up
doors way down the road.
(27:41):
So this is what I mean when I'mencouraging all of you to focus
on the big picture.
When you build the rightpartnerships, you are not just
serving your community, you'rebuilding your future network,
your resume and your reputation,and that is a powerful return
on something that you alreadycare so deeply about and it's
(28:01):
the foundation for lastinginfluence.
So some just like basic examplehere of partnerships.
Let's look at the Miss Americaorganization.
When I was competing, the MissAmerica organization was
partnered with the Children'sMiracle Network Hospital.
Some of the benefits of thatpartnership included
opportunities for title holdersto go in and be a part of a
(28:24):
young child's life and help themfeel good and for them to like
make that child's day and be apart of something that is so
much bigger than themselves,like just going to the hospital
and visiting like.
I have some of the mostbeautiful memories as Miss
Wisconsin and as a local titleholder, of the most beautiful
(28:44):
memories as Miss Wisconsin andas a local title holder.
But there's one memory as MissWisconsin that I went to the
Children's Miracle NetworkHospital in my community that I
grew up in and I remember likethis little girl just loved Star
Wars and she had put on a DarthVader helmet and we were
(29:04):
playing like Star Wars togetherand we were having like what is
it called?
The swords my God forgive me, Iactually haven't really seen
all the Star Wars movies, butthe laser sword things, like I
have pictures of that and it wasjust so much fun and it just
like it was an opportunity forus as title holders to help
(29:25):
these kids get distracted fromwhatever like pain or illness
they were experiencing at thetime, and so that that was
really powerful for us and itwas beneficial for the families
that our crowns on showing thatsupport.
(29:51):
And we also did a lot offundraising for Children's
Miracle Network Hospitals.
The fundraising that we did inpart supported Miss America
through the scholarship funds,but it also was divvied up
between that and Children'sMiracle Network Hospital.
So there was just there was alot of mutual benefit between
that partnership.
And now the Miss Americaorganization, as you know, is
(30:13):
partnered with the AmericanHeart Association and the Go Red
for Women.
That's mutually beneficialbecause it is creating exposure
for both organizations.
They have very similar missionsin the health of women and
educating women on their healthand wellness and with America
launching like the fitnessportion of competition in
(30:36):
partnership then with RebelAthletic, it just it all kind of
comes together and you can kindof come to your own conclusions
as well about the mutualbenefits of that partnership.
So that's like, if you'relooking at these larger
organizations, you will findpartnerships like that in a lot
of different spaces, and so itmakes sense then for you with
(30:58):
your platform to also have someof these partnerships, have some
of these partnerships.
So one of my partnerships that Ihad as Miss Wisconsin and
through my initiative Tyler'sLegacy the Impact of Substance
Abuse on the Family was with theRed Ribbon Campaign.
Red Ribbon Week is celebratedannually in October, and so they
highlight the importance ofliving a drug-free life.
(31:20):
So I was able to partner withthem and use a lot of their
resources and materials, takingthat into schools and speaking
with students about that, andthen, in turn, they also
promoted me as Miss Wisconsin inthe program that I was doing,
so that I had a larger reach atthe same time.
So that was one of manypartnerships that I had as well
throughout my experience as atitle holder, but it was
(31:44):
creative too.
It was just one of those thingswhere I just did a Google
search and I was like what aresome of these organizations that
are doing the things alreadythat I also want to be doing and
how can I support them inpromoting their mission and
their messaging and how can theyalso support me and the goals
that I have?
So that leads into then how doyou develop a strategic
(32:06):
partnership?
We already know how importantpartnerships are, so how in the
world do we even get started?
How do we build an intentional,service-based business plan as
a title holder?
So let's break it down.
The first thing that you have todo is clarify what your goals
are.
What are your professionalgoals?
What career paths are youexploring?
(32:27):
So, for me, I loved publicspeaking and I knew that the
more public speaking experiencethat I could gain through my
initiative and throughpartnerships, that would develop
opportunities for me topotentially be a public speaker
professionally in my career.
That was one area.
The other area area, too, wasthat I wanted to get into
nonprofit development and soworking with other organizations
(32:50):
that, aligned with my mission,would give me more experience in
understanding how nonprofitswork and what opportunities
there might be career-wise forme in those nonprofits.
What are your personal goals?
That is like what causesgenuinely light you up, what
causes genuinely fill you withthis sense of purpose and
(33:10):
inspiration and energy?
That is something that thatgoes back to truly like.
What is your platform ingeneral, but personally, when
you are looking throughdifferent organizations maybe
community-based, state-based ornationally and looking through
their mission and the work thatthey're doing, what's getting
(33:30):
you excited?
What about those specific keycomponents of those
organizations are making youinterested in getting involved.
That's something reallyimportant to think about.
Your strategic partnershipsshould not just be strategy for
this outcome of you know,looking really good in front of
(33:51):
the judges or buildingcredibility.
No, it also needs to be thatyou genuinely appreciate what
that organization is doing.
And then, finally, what areyour service goals?
What kind of community impactdo you want to make, and make
sure that that lines up with theorganization as well?
So for the Red Ribbon campaign,for example, one of their main
goals was to educate students,and they wanted to do that
(34:12):
through evidence-basedcurriculum.
And so for me to be, and theywanted to do that through
evidence-based curriculum, andso for me to be able to use a
lot of that evidence-basedcurriculum and my own messaging
and lived experience thatelevated the community impact
that I wanted to make.
Next, you want to identify yourvalue.
What do you bring to the table?
What skills, what audience,what story, what visibility do
(34:36):
you bring?
Okay, and this is, I think,where it gets a little bit
tricky this is where we may havesome of that imposter syndrome
start to sneak in, because it'sa little more difficult for us
to look internally and be likewhat makes me awesome, but it is
an important step to this,because anytime that you're
going into an interview, whetherthat's a pageant interview or a
(34:57):
job interview you need to knowwhat you're bringing to the
table that will benefit thatorganization.
Okay, so, for example, is itpublic speaking?
For me, that was a big part ofit.
I loved public speaking.
I had a unique story, which isanother value that I brought to
the table.
Speaking, I had a unique story,which is another value that I
brought to the table, and I alsohad a lot of ability to support
different events, to supportfundraising.
(35:19):
I had a little bit more well,not as much back then because
social media was just kind ofstarting to flourish, but for
you, like, that value that youmay bring to the table is your
social media reach through yourtitle holder and personal pages
as well.
So get creative and startasking to the people that know
you most like.
What would you think issomething that I provide, could
(35:40):
provide to an organizationthat's really valuable?
Could be organization skills,could be creativity, could be,
again, your unique story.
There's a lot of differentthings that you can bring to the
table as value that you need tojust uncover for yourself.
Next, and this is probably oneof the more difficult areas as
well is you actually have toinitiate the conversation.
(36:01):
You'd have to do the outreach,you have to email, you have to
send the DMs, you have to do thein-person networking.
So that, I think, is one bighump that I know from experience
working with my clients isreally difficult to do.
Is that just general outreach?
But here's my advice to you youhave to keep it simple, you
guys, just keep it so simple.
(36:22):
Don't overthink it.
It doesn't have to be thisperfectly concocted email or
message.
It's simple.
Here's who I am, here's what Ido, here's why I love the
mission of your organization.
Do you have time to meet totalk about the ways I might be
able to support your efforts?
Okay, you already haveidentified your value, you know
what your goals are, but now wejust have to start the
(36:44):
conversation.
Don't overcomplicate it.
Just lead with your honesty andlead with clarity.
So I have a really awesomeexample of this happening for a
client recently that you know.
We were talking about just this.
We had a whole hour longconversation where we were
talking about what are yourgoals for being a state title
holder?
What does it actually look likewhat's the big picture and
let's start developing yourbusiness plan.
(37:05):
So you've got that lined up andready to go.
And so we started talking aboutpartnerships and started doing
some research together and foundan organization based in her
state.
That was like truly ideal.
That was like the mission linesup.
This is perfect, Like I wouldbe able to support them in this
way, this way and this way, andthey would be able to support me
.
But she didn't have any of thatlike clearly lined out or like
(37:26):
how do I pitch that to them?
And I was like just reach outand see what happens.
And so a few days later, shetexted me.
I was like I'm so excited.
I just got off a call with them.
They have a million differentideas for ways that they want to
get me involved.
They're so excited about theexpertise that I bring to the
table and the work that I'vealready done, and here's how
they're going to support me.
And it's just going to beamazing.
(37:48):
And I was like, look, the otheraspect of this is you've been
talking about how you want tobranch out in your career and
maybe this is an opportunity foryou to do that is to work with
an organization just like this,and they have the connections.
So it was just like this huge,incredible win and all it was
you guys was it just took hersitting down and writing an
(38:10):
email and they got back to herand they were just super
thrilled.
Now, don't take it personally ifthey don't get back to you
right away.
Don't take it personally ifthey don't get back to you at
all.
I worked in nonprofit.
It's crazy.
You wear a lot of hats innonprofit and they don't always
have time for every person thatreaches out to them with
something like this.
So don't take it personally.
Do follow up a couple of times.
(38:32):
Three times is the charm, butdon't take it personally.
It's not about you if theydon't respond.
And finally, there's a mindsetpiece to all of this as well.
I've been talking a little bitabout imposter syndrome
throughout this, but there'salso, like the first time,
nerves, like this fear of who amI to do this, who am I to think
(38:53):
that I have anything that I cancontribute to this larger
organization, that feeling oflike you know I have never done
this before.
I don't quite know what I'mdoing, I don't really have a
clear idea of what they mightwant from me Like I can't come
to the table and be like this ismy plan, that's okay.
Like don't go to the table witha plan, because you know they
(39:14):
are an organization that'salready doing their own thing
and they have their objectivesand they have their business
plan and their goals for theyear.
So they've already got all ofthis.
Go in with an open mind and seehow you might be able to
contribute to their missionthat's already lined up, and see
what comes of it, and you mightexperience one of the most
beautiful conversations andleave with a new sense of
(39:37):
overwhelm of not, it's no longerwho am I to do this, but now
it's.
Oh my gosh, how am I going todo all of this?
Because they gave me so manyopportunities.
It's a whole new level ofexcitement and nerves.
So everything that you've everdone before was something that
you never did before.
That Okay.
So everything is you've everdone before was something that
you never did before.
That Okay.
(39:57):
So everything is always goingto be new.
You have to reframe yourmindset about this, that you're
not trying to be perfect.
You're just going to show upprepared and passionate.
That's all that you can do.
Just put yourself out there.
It's kind of like dating andlike meeting someone for the
first time.
You really don't know what toexpect, but you can go in with
these intentions, like I'm justgonna be myself, and they can
take it or leave it Kind of thesame concept.
(40:20):
Finally, we have to remember thelong-term vision, the big
picture Beyond your reign.
What are you really building?
Okay, you are building yournetwork.
This is potential future jobleads.
I got all of my jobs fromnetworking.
(40:40):
Truly like every single jobthat I held after college was
from networking.
My first clients that I had onboard in Fearlessly Authentic
were ones that I had knownalready, and so much of our
success starts from our closecircle of people that we already
(41:02):
know.
So, build your network.
It's your future job leads,it's references for future jobs,
it's potential mentors and it'scollaborators.
Your service will equate to theexperience that makes your
resume shine above and beyondanybody else's.
So the more that you do, themore that you gain.
(41:25):
Your initiative is a way toprove consistency and leadership
skills.
So the more that you are ableto put yourself out there and be
consistent with the work thatyou're doing in your platform
and developing it and letting itgrow in beautiful ways.
You are proving that you havethe ability to consistently grow
and to lead something biggerthan yourself.
(41:46):
So, as a reminder and I thinkthis is hard because sometimes
this just happens, it did for mefor a little while.
It wasn't a completeabandonment, but try not to
build a platform that you'regoing to abandon.
The second your title ends.
It is something that can growwith you if it's built
(42:08):
authentically.
I know that that's somethingthat happened with mine.
Eventually, like with bothplatforms, with Tyler's Legacy
and with Empowering Women I meanso much of that has influenced
who I am today and the work thatI do with my clients every
single day.
Mine is obviously a very uniqueexperience because I'm
literally taking the experiencesthat I had as a title holder
(42:29):
and coaching my clients to dosimilar things with their
experiences as title holders.
But your work that you do withyour platform can continue
growing and expanding and cangrow with you, as long as you're
doing it in a way that is trueto yourself.
So with that let's wrap this up,because there's a lot for you
(42:51):
to process after thisconversation.
So here are the key takeawaysService with strategy will
culminate in sustainable impact,long-term sustainable impact.
Let it grow naturally,organically.
Okay, don't force anything.
Just do things because theyfeel good, they feel right and
(43:13):
you feel passionate about andyou're energized to do that.
Focus on your alignment withother organizations that you're
looking to partner with, or withthe work that you're doing and
your plan that you're developingfor your platform, over the
impressiveness.
Do not develop a platform orengage in partnerships just to
(43:35):
look impressive on the outside.
It's going to burn you outevery single time.
Do it because you love it andlet your consistency speak for
itself.
We're not trying to proveanything.
We're not trying to, like, makeourselves look awesome.
Do it because you truly, trulylove it, and the rest is going
to fall in line.
So here's my encouragement foryou Again, as you're processing
(43:59):
this load of information thatI've thrown at you, is that you
do not need to have it allfigured out, you guys.
You just have to get started,and get started with something
that matters the most to you.
Okay, so with that, if youwouldn't mind, I would really,
really love if you would connectwith me and share your platform
on Instagram or in the Sash andSoul community.
(44:22):
One of my favorite parts ofwhat I do is learning about your
unique passion and the thingsthat you are doing to change the
world.
So tag Sash and Soul with thishashtag hashtag
SashSuccessStories because welove alliteration and let's
celebrate your wins together.
Let's build this community ofwomen that are out there doing
(44:45):
things because they love it,because it energizes them and
building these really beautifulpartnerships that are truly
going to change the world andcreate a positive impact.
So tag Sash and Soul it's atSash and Soul and use the
hashtag SashSuccessStories sothat I can share the amazing
work that you're doing and I canget inspired by you as well.
(45:05):
All right With that.
April's masterclass is ondeveloping your platform, so you
don't want to miss that.
It's on Tuesday, april 29th,from 7 to 8 pm Central Time, and
you are able to register forthat for free.
Registration is now open, socheck out the link in the show
description or you can DM me onInstagram at Sash and Soul.
We're going to talk a lot moreabout where to get started with
(45:27):
your platform, developing yourplan, and how to articulate your
mission, your vision and yourkey message to the judges and
your community.
All right, you guys, with that.
I am excited to go on vacation,so I'm gonna wrap this up and
get all my work done so that Ican officially dive into
(45:48):
vacation mode and I will chatwith you again next week.
Bye.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!