August 4, 2025 • 46 mins
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In this powerful episode of Security Halt!, host Deny Caballero sits down with Alan Shebaro, a veteran who transformed personal hardship into a global mission of growth, healing, and service. Alan shares his candid journey from the depths of mental health struggles to discovering resilience through community, mindfulness, and the discipline of jiu-jitsu.
Explore how traveling the world, connecting with others, and choosing to live for today helped Alan rebuild a life rooted in purpose and perspective. His story is a beacon of hope for any veteran feeling stuck, isolated, or searching for meaning after service.
Whether you're navigating transition, struggling with mental health, or just need a reminder that you're not alone—this episode is for you.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
right how you doing brother any better.
Couldn't stand myself right on,man dude I.
I love finding veterans that uh, are hard at work and sticking
to something that bringsdiscipline in their life and can
help inspire others.
And what better way to do itthan continuing that lifelong
commitment of excellence bydoing something hard every
(00:28):
single day?
And when you look and find yourpage on social media, it's
nothing but a catalog of thatdoing hard shit every single day
.
So today, man, I want to tapinto your story, not just the
great accolades you've done inyour service, but where you
found success on the transition.
You and I both know that wecontinue to lose our brothers,
(00:48):
even within special operations.
We have this myth that our guyscan't break and sadly that's
not true.
But tapping into your story toshare the things that go right,
the things that work, that ledyou down this path of success
and, yeah, I want to explorethat today with you Awesome, so
it actually started from hittingrock bottom, led you down this
path of success and uh, yeah, Iwant to explore that today with
you.
Awesome, so it actually itactually started from hitting
(01:10):
rock bottom.
Yep, as often, more often thannot, that's the way it starts,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I mean to the point where.
See about, I got out of activeduty in 2010.
I was national guard for acouple of years, um out in 2010.
I was National Guard for acouple years out in Texas with
19th Group.
In 2010, in May, I opened up myown gym in McKinney and I just
(01:45):
dove into that headfirst, justtrying to get up and going.
I've never opened up, I neverhad a business period, so I was
literally learning as I wentalong and I didn't have a plan B
.
Just I was going to make thiswork, no matter what.
The problem was is that I waslike super busy.
I just wasn't very productiveand I already had issues that I
just didn't realize I had.
(02:05):
There wasn't anything that wasgoing to keep me from succeeding
.
That became kind of a problembecause I couldn't read the
signs.
I was going full force andbasically it just went from.
I was teaching five, sixclasses a day, waking up at like
4.30 and teaching a a 6 amclass, and then 9 am class, noon
(02:27):
class, afternoon class likearound 4 30, and then one after
that and another jiu-jitsu oneafter that, and then another
fitness one after that, and thenI'd get right back on the
computer and try to figure out,you know, google ads and like,
literally like business fordummies.
I was literally living in mygym for 18 months on the couch,
(02:50):
because I felt that it was a,the sacrifice was worth it.
I can have an apartment or Ican make this business work.
Okay, let me just sleep on thecouch, I'm good.
The problem was is that I didn'teven recognize, like, all the
things that were wrong.
I just kept dismissing them andthen I started kind of
(03:11):
developing injuries.
But I had to teach and I had to, you know, and I felt like I
needed to be a leader and thatmeans that I had to be first in
line first, you know, first upfront with the highest lifting,
with the fastest times.
I was still competing injuiu-jitsu and I was just
wearing myself thin and runningon red line for years.
And it started out where I wastaking like one Ambien in the
(03:36):
morning and then 20 milligramsof Adderall in the morning to
within a few years, I was taking, waking up and taking 30
milligrams in the morning, 30milligrams around noon and then
30 milligrams in the afternoon,like late in the evening, and I
just kept pushing and then, inorder to fall asleep with all
(03:56):
that dosage.
I went from taking one Ambiento taking two Ambien, percocet
and Washington Down, you know,with a six-pack of beer, and of
course I only slept for likethree hours, yeah, but it was
three hours that I could, theonly three hours that I could
get, and it just everyone's gota limit.
(04:22):
And what I didn't realize was,you know, we're all used to
physical injuries and we canjust kind of like, okay, this is
what's wrong, I can fix it or Ican just walk it off.
But when it becomes like mentalissues and that's what I was
dealing with I didn't know whatthe signs, symptoms, you know,
it was just yeah, I'm sad, justbrush it off.
(04:44):
You know, it was just yeah, I'msad, just brush it off.
And um, when you startrationalizing irrational
thoughts, that's what got me andbefore you know, it starts
spiraling down into theseirrational thoughts of failure
and just absolute, likecatastrophe and everything that
I'm doing and it's coming frommy own mind.
How do you fix that?
You know, and I mean, it justgot to the point where I just
(05:06):
hit rock bottom in 2014 or 2015one of the two I almost shot
myself and kind of got lucky onthat.
I actually had a dog that keptlike bugging the shit out of me
and uh, kept pawing me, man likeon my hand, and I remember just
(05:29):
kicking the shit out of him andhe went like halfway across the
room and then he came rightback and kept doing the same
thing and I felt like such afucking shit back, sorry um no,
you can cuss all day, every day,on this, this show.
I just felt so like honestlylike it just like such a shit
bag for kicking my dog and Ilove that dog, it was like the
(05:50):
best dog I ever had and that'swhat actually pulled me away
from what I was doing.
So after that, you know, Iactually started to seek help
and realize that there wassomething wrong and I needed to
kind of get something and get itfixed.
And around that time I met JoeyBozic and he was a triple
amputee.
He was in Iraq, he got hit withan IED as an MP and you know he
(06:14):
came in first.
First he came in to kind of vetme because the original name of
my gym was tier one trainingfacility and he's like, oh, it's
probably one of those of thoseyou know jackasses that just
uses the name.
So we got to talking and youknow he was, he was at brag, you
know I was at brag and westarted kind of talking and
before I knew it we actuallyknew some of the same people and
he had come in to to actuallyget lessons for his daughter.
(06:37):
And then the conversation, um,kind of spiraled into.
You know, like, have you of,you know, doing jiu-jitsu
yourself?
He's like, well, you know, Itried it before, because he was
actually a martial artist beforehe got into jiu-jitsu, like
when he had all his limbs.
He spent a lifetime in it.
So I was like man, I've neverdone this, but if you're willing
(07:02):
to be patient with me, I'll bepatient with you, we can work
something out.
And I was like, just come uptomorrow, we'll see what we got.
And after one session everythingwas just so like complex.
But it was such a reliefbecause it was so different and
it really took my mind offthings and I really was able to
focus just on that.
(07:23):
It really took my mind offthings and I really was able to
focus just on that, and I wrotedown like eight pages of notes
and I had to scrap like six ofthem because I didn't know about
the muscle flap being over.
He has like titanium rods forfemurs and so the flap's over so
he can roll over it but hecan't push off of it, which
means like the center core isdifferent for movements.
And then he had one leg longerthan the other.
(07:45):
His arm was amputated justbelow the elbow.
He had partial rotation in onearm but not in the other, and so
but there was two pages that Iliterally could work.
And so we started from there andI was like, cool man, come back
tomorrow.
And he's like what, come backtomorrow, man, we'll keep
working on it.
And so we just workedone-on-one for for a few months,
(08:08):
like about four or five months,three, three days a week on
average, damn and um.
And then one day we're sittingin the corner of the mat and
just trying to talk and and andlike what kind of therapy would
work for the shit that's wrongwith them physically or mentally
, because I know this shit worksfor me and obviously it's
(08:30):
working for you, so why don't wetry to come up with something?
And so that's how we came upwith the idea for we Defy
Foundation and we're going on 10years now.
I think the number's up toabout 1,800 veterans to the
program.
That's remarkable work.
(08:51):
Yeah, it's amazing.
I'm so proud of being able tostart it.
But the people that have beenable to kind of take over
because, again, you know, joeyand I never had worked at a
nonprofit, never had any cluehow to do any of this and we're
just trying to figure it out aswe go, and I remember like we
(09:14):
were doing seminars to raisemoney for that, and it cost
about $2,000 for people to runthrough the program.
Because what we do is we find ajob, um, an academy, a
jiu-jitsu academy, that'swanting to become an affiliate,
and it doesn't matter.
You know what flag they fly.
And then, once we approve thefacility, we recommend a veteran
(09:35):
to them.
So what ends up happening is um, they go up, they show up.
As long as they show up forthree times a week, we'll pay
for the tuition, their gi, gi,their belt, their rash guard,
everything they need to getstarted, and so all they have to
do is show up.
And the amazing part about thatis that it was we didn't
realize, like how much how thecorrelation between military and
(09:58):
jujitsu was.
I mean, we have thatcamaraderie.
We have a ranking system.
We have, you know it's, it's acombat sport, right, but it's
also something that makes youthink a lot.
Thanks to social media, peopleare held accountable, you know,
because if you don't have atraining partner, well, there's
someone that's going to besitting out, and so we have
(10:21):
mentors.
Now we have affiliates in all50 states.
I think we're up to like 700 or800 affiliates, including in
Japan, guam, puerto Rico, up inAlaska everywhere Damn, it's
(10:42):
just blown up.
So four years, I was thedirector and the vice president,
and also the international, andwhat grew out of it was in 2017
, I went to England and met witha Royal Marine Commando.
He'd been kind of following mesince the inception of it and we
(11:06):
started talking and I gave himlike the full blueprint.
This is what we did.
This is how we did it.
This is how we started.
This is the things you got tolook out for.
They ended up starting Reorg,so Reorg Jiu-Jitsu Foundation.
Now it's developed into ReorgCharity, but that's actually how
Tom Hardy got into jiu-jitsu,was meeting through them and two
(11:27):
years later, I get a messagefrom Scott Steer, who was in the
Australian Army, and then westarted Veterans Grappling, so
it was able to spawn off todifferent countries.
The same idea run a little bitdifferent due to the
circumstances of you know.
However, the nonprofit works,the laws work, but the idea and
(11:48):
the concept itself was able tokind of take the blueprint and
make it work for where you're atIn 2023, there's going to be
I'm not sure where they're atwith it, but they started, they
got the approval to start a weDefy Foundation Canada.
Wow, hell.
Yeah, I was able to really keepit going and spread it out by
2019.
I was getting burned out and,um, I had to step down from the
(12:11):
board, but the staff that thatthat took over has done such an
amazing job with everything.
It was able to take it out fromthat, from there, and just
continue the growth of it towhere we're at today, and I
couldn't be any more proud ofthem for what they've done.
They've just done a phenomenaljob that's a testament of what.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
What can happen when you're able to pause like a lot
of times we get stuck in our ownsuffering, we can sit down and
let it eat us up and we just sitthere and it will deteriorate
you faster than anything.
But through a chance encounterit took you out of that and
brought you out of your ownsphere.
And then you saw somebody else.
(12:53):
And we don't want to comparetrauma, we don't want to compare
.
Somebody's got worse than me,no, but you're able to see
somebody else that's missing arm, missing legs.
How can I help you?
How can I help you get some joy, get a little bit of respite
from what you're dealing with?
And that nexus being able toconnect with a human being
(13:14):
that's what's really helping alot of people and we don't focus
.
There's a lot of interventionsout there that do a lot of great
care, but all in all, we'rehuman beings, we're meant to
connect.
What's that friendship like?
Today, you guys still connected, you guys still do this stuff
together um, not so much, um,not for any other.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
I mean, we're still keeping contact, of course, but,
um, I sold my gym, uh, lastyear and I just had kind of a
calling.
I guess I was raised overseasgrowing up, so I actually lived
(13:55):
in Italy and Germany and Austriaand Saudi Arabia, and so I
didn't actually move to theStates until I was 19.
Wow, when I was 95.
And then I, just after 14 yearsof owning a gym a gym is like
taking care of an infant for theentire time that you're there
you always got to be there.
So it's a lot of responsibility, it's a lot of hard work, but
(14:16):
if you love doing it, I meanthere's so much benefit that
comes out of it.
And I got no regrets for what Idid.
But I felt like I needed to dosomething else.
Man, I had um within one month.
I was just reaching out to someyou know some people and, kind
of that, lost contact with them,like, hey, man, how you been?
(14:37):
He's like man I got, I gotcancer and I was like holy shit,
dude, you're like 53.
You know what I mean.
And then I talked to anotherone and he got cancer.
So three guys that I knew all,all of them like less than five
years older than me, you knowgot some type of cancer and I
was like dude, fuck this, dude,I'm Papa Tuck.
There's like so much shit inthe world that I haven't seen so
(14:57):
I, literally I, sold my gym.
Three weeks later I was on aflight and I took off and
started in England and then Iwent to visit my best friend in
Germany and went down.
My mother lives in Italy and soI went and visited her, then
went to.
I went and visited her, thenwent to the West Bank for a
couple of months, was in Jordanfor a little bit, turned around,
(15:22):
came back to the States for afew weeks and then headed out to
Thailand.
I was there for a bit, and thenVietnam for a month and then
Laos for a month, came back downto Vietnam because I absolutely
loved it, and then down toMalaysia and back to then
(15:44):
Cambodia.
I absolutely fell in love withVietnam and Ho Chi Minh City,
and so that's actually my homebase.
Now, what about in Vietnam city?
Speaker 1 (15:53):
exactly, and so that's actually my home base now
.
So there's, I got a trip out ofvietnam, that's something.
Uh, you know, that's uh, wegotta dive in that for a little
bit man.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
So I got really lucky , like everywhere that I went in
laos, I was in vietnam and, um,I absolutely love that place.
It's amazing and just the, theculture, the food, just all the
food, everything about it.
It was just and it was.
I was, don't get me wrong, Iwasn't like staying at the Ritz
or anything.
You know, I was staying at alot of the places you know where
(16:23):
.
Just, I rent an apartment forlike a month and it's, you know,
relatively inexpensive.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Doing the old Green Beret thing, living off the
local economy.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Yeah, it's amazing.
Um, the street food.
I, I fell in love with thestreet food.
I just I couldn't get enough.
And the the weird part is isthat you know, most of it's like
there's no preservatives, orpretty much all of it's no
preservatives, no, and and youcan eat healthy just as much for
a fraction of the price.
(16:53):
Yeah, and just being able toexperience something new is what
I really kind of fell in lovewith, and that's a part of the
world that, like I've never beento spend a lot of time to in
that area Islands, like inBangkok, it's.
It's beautiful, don't get mewrong, but it's kind of like
(17:14):
Vegas.
It's beautiful, don't get mewrong, but it's kind of like
Vegas, you know, it'soverwhelming, you know, so you
can only take it.
For so long I wanted to go toChiang Mai, which is up north,
but I picked the time framewhere it's like everything was
flooded, so that's how I endedup going straight to Vietnam
after that and then I was inHanoi for a month and man, that
(17:36):
place is just crazy wild and Iliterally would just my favorite
thing to do, honestly, wasliterally just go walk out of my
apartment.
I'm like, okay, I've been hereand just I'd walk west and just
see where it took me, you, Ijust walked the streets and you
know, stop and eat some pho.
(17:56):
You know, just out of nowhere,bumble way, there's all these
different foods that I've neverhad, and and again, I just 20
bucks maybe for the day and I'deat like five, six meals.
Everyone was just very curious,you know.
So the area that I staying at,there weren't many white expats
there, so a lot of people werejust kind of like staring.
(18:17):
Laos, the same thing.
Cambodia I was actually on thecoastline of Cambodia and that
was one of the more recent tripswhen I was in Vietnam, when I
went down to Saigon.
Actually I don't have a workvisa, so what I did instead was
I was raising money for like oneof the orphanages there.
So when I went to Cambodia, Iwanted to kind of get involved
(18:39):
with the human trafficking andthings like that.
So I met some people from anonprofit.
They showed me around there andamazing people, the program
they have there.
I spent like a week just kindof seeing the whole operation.
It's truly phenomenal what theydo with so little and they make
(19:03):
it work and it's and it'sabsolutely amazing the um, the
care that they put, the, theamount of, uh, just everything
about it, like how caring theyare.
It's just, it's incredible yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Did you go there thinking that you were going to
get involved with this fight ordid it just kind of opportunity
just opened up?
It just?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
there's, no, there's nothing greater than to help
someone in need, right,absolutely, and so anywhere that
I can help somebody in any way,you know, whether it be
training jujitsu and justshowing them stuff to help their
game, or just bringing moreattention and awareness to a
certain organization that I knowis doing well, I'm more than
happy to do it and it doesn'tcost me anything.
(19:39):
You know what I mean.
I'm just kind of like I havesomewhat of a following and you
know.
So I try to sort of just expose, like you know, give some
exposure to to some like honest,good organizations, you know,
to some honest, goodorganizations.
So, yeah, there's a couple morethat I want to go to, like in
(19:59):
Vietnam there's some of thepeople that were affected by the
Agent Orange, likegenerationally.
Yeah, I'll try to go up thereand see what we can do, because
they recently got their USAIDpulled, so we're talking a lot
of people with physical defectsand so forth from.
(20:20):
I mean, they have 68,000 hectaacres that's still contaminated,
wow, so it's kind of crazy.
And you don't think about thesethings in the States because
everything's so far away, we'reso isolated in the States.
Because everything's so faraway, we're so isolated, I don't
have a work visa.
I was literally talking tosomeone about this today.
My schedule is literally like Iget up when the sun gets up, I
(20:43):
go walk outside or I go to thegym, it doesn't matter.
Whenever I feel like it, I goget my coconut which is like
within 100 feet and theyliterally chop it right there
and I'm just sipping on thecoconut juice.
Go get some fresh squeezedorange juice, a couple of banh
mi sandwiches, you know stuffwith some eggs and liver pate
(21:08):
and all the good stuff, and hangout at a cafe, chill out for
like an hour, come back, gotrain, then come back from there
and go hang out at the pool.
I mean, it's a hard life.
It's a hard life, it's awonderful life right now.
I got no complaints.
I got a trip to Bhutanscheduled in October.
I'm going to Mongolia, all theplaces.
(21:28):
I've never been man Life's tooshort, I still got my health.
I can do things that are active.
Been man life's too short, Istill got my health.
I can do things that are active.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
I'm gonna take advantage of that for as long as
I can there's something to besaid about that man.
There's a lot of people settleinto this idea of this work
culture where, like you know,I'm a victim of it too.
I'm victim of this mentality ofjust working non-stop the grind
, the grind, the grind.
And then you realize the yeargoes by really fucking fast, and
then two years, three years,four years, five years.
(21:57):
When are you making time foryourself?
When are you like?
Projects are great, thebusiness is great, achieving
things are great, but fuck atrophy, fuck the achievement
Life.
Life is the ultimate thing thatyou need to be worried about.
What are you doing with yourfamily, with your kids?
Do you want them to onlyremember you at 5 pm, when you
(22:19):
walk into the door as a ghostthat tiptoes through the house,
leaving at 430?
Got to have a life, got to makeit happen.
I'm saying this because I needto hear it myself.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
I mean like right before, like during COVID it was
one of the catalysts why I soldthe gym is we had to shut down
for several months.
I was still paying my employees, I was still paying rent and,
man, I managed to get myself inlike so much debt from that.
And trying to recover that,trying to get students back and
try to get back up there, Iended up taking a corporate job
(22:50):
as a project manager for aplumbing company.
It was my first corporate jobI'd ever done and I was making
good money.
Don't get me wrong.
But I was waking up at 5 am,going to the gym for some type
of workout like 45 minutesbecause I had a shower, get back
to work and then I'd be workingthere from 7.30 to noon, then
(23:13):
go teach, come back to work andthen get off work around 5, you
know enough time to go eat, comeback, teach again, get home
like around 8.30.
And I was married at the time,so she was stressed out because
I was only spending like acouple hours at night and by the
time, you know, I got home, allI wanted to do was just chill
out and she's about to go tosleep.
(23:34):
Then the weekend comes, theonly thing I want to do is sleep
.
So it really made things rough.
And what I realized is that twoand a half years of working at
that job, yeah, I was able tomake the money to pay off all my
bills and pay off my debt.
But what I realized is thatthose entire two and a half
(23:55):
years was literally like anamalgam of one week, like I
couldn't separate the days, Icouldn't separate everything,
because all I was doing lookingat computer screen, going to job
sites, and they all looked thesame.
And then realized that you knowwe work, you know eight to 10
hours a day to get two days off,and then for two weeks a year
(24:18):
you have time off and to me andit could be perfect for other
people, I'm not, I'm not, it'sjust not for me.
You know what I mean.
If that's what you'd like to do, and you know, by all means, I
just I realized that it's justnot for me and I quit that job
and that's when I started kindof like pursuing this and then,
(24:38):
a year later, I just said, no, Igot to go now.
And that's when I popped smokeand left.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
At the end of the day , you got to do what's right for
you.
You got to figure out what'sright.
And you mentioned the cancerepidemic that we're going
through and hearing your friendslike, yeah, and it's shocking
Guys in their 40s too gettingcancer To think that you can go
(25:05):
out just like that withoutexperiencing life and seeing
things.
It's a no brainer.
You got to explore.
It's a no brainer.
You gotta explore that.
Do you feel a longing or asense of like missing out on?
You know the things back homein the state or you know things
going on in stateside, cause Ican imagine there there's gotta
be, there's gotta be some peopleyou miss back in the mainland.
(25:27):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
The people that I I mean I love my brothers that are
back home.
I definitely miss them.
The people that I I mean I lovemy brothers that are back home,
I definitely miss them.
There's people back at homethat I definitely miss.
I miss riding.
I used to.
I got into horse riding andcutting event and after I did my
first event I got so addictedto it and the coach that I had
(25:49):
has been working at a ranch.
He's like hey, do you want tocome over?
Yes, yes, I do.
Yes, I do you want to come over?
Yes, yes, I do, yes, Iabsolutely do.
And so I would drive fromMcKinney to Weatherford, which
is like about an hour and a halfalmost an hour and 45 minutes
one way, and I absolutely lovedit, like I would look forward to
it.
I loved like going out thereand we just moved cows from one
pen to the other and it trulywas.
(26:16):
Just.
If you want to talk abouttherapy, that's the only thing
that I found that's matchedjiu-jitsu, for therapy is the
equine therapy, and if anyonewants to do that, I would so
highly recommend it.
It is absolutely incredible.
It's amazing.
I got truly lucky meeting thepeople that I did, and he just
kept inviting me out.
I kept saying yes, so hecouldn't get rid of me.
The whole time I was there andthat's something I don't have in
Asia.
You don't have cutting, youdon't have the same type of
(26:40):
ranches.
We don't have the sameconnections Not yet.
So I'm still working on it, butwe'll see yeah, who taught you
how to cut?
what's that?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
he taught you how to cut, how to go.
Uh, learn how to cut so july of2023.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
I get a friend of mine that I've known from
jiu-jitsu, that I've known forlike 20 years and he ended up
being the president of the nhcaand he's like, hey, we're doing
this uh cutting event, militarycutting challenge.
Do you want to be a part of?
Like yes, anything that has todo with veterans and helping
them out?
I'm in, and so he starts kindof describing what we're doing
and everything.
And then, yeah, so 10 minuteslater, I'm just like wait, you,
(27:22):
you want me to ride?
He's like, yeah, man, I'm like,dude, I've never ridden a horse
.
He's like, oh, you'll be fine.
I was like holy shit, okay.
And then I started looking upYouTube and I'm like cutting,
cutting horses, horses, cutting.
And I'm like holy shit, dude,those things are fast.
And I always had like this.
(27:43):
I always thought horses werelike majestic, right Next to
elephants.
I think they're the mostmajestic creatures on this
planet, but I had this respectfor them like you stay over
there, you'd be beautiful, andI'll stay over here, we'll just
keep our distance, you know,yeah, and then, because they're
massive, you know, but a goodfriend of mine, larry, he has a
(28:06):
ranch and he's like man, we needto get you on horse if you're
going to be doing this event.
So there's a picture and I'mliterally on the horse and he's
like you got to kick it.
I'm like, fuck you, dude,there's no way I'm kicking this
thing.
So I'm literally just like onthe fence and just kind of like
just hanging out, like am Idoing?
All right, you know it's notmoving the horse, kind of
(28:26):
looking back, kind of likewaiting, and I'm just like, no,
I'm good, we're good, we're goodlike this, this is really good.
And then until, like, thetrainer came up and grabbed the
reins and, kind of like, walkedme around, like it was like a
kiss, but he taught me how tolike approach a horse.
When you walk around it, yougot to keep contact and you know
how to put on a saddle and allthese small things that I had no
(28:50):
clue about.
And then a week later, I didthat cutting event and it was
like a competition, but it'slike a fundraiser, so it's not
like rated or anything, and Iended up getting third.
I just absolutely loved it.
And there were other veteransspecial operations veterans that
(29:11):
were there too, rangers and sf,and then we had the navy guy as
well.
And so they do it annually nowand it's a military cutting
challenge.
If anyone interested in that,it's a phenomenal, absolutely
phenomenal deal that they have.
You know they take care of them, they go and take them to a
range to take them coaching andI'm talking like the best in the
freaking world.
You cutting coaches and you getexposed to something entirely
(29:35):
new For me.
It changed my life so I can'tthank these guys enough.
So Jay Winborn was the guy thatgot me involved and then Bruce
Maureen was my coach that keptbringing me to the ranch and
coached me through that twicebut honestly it was
life-changing.
So I miss that.
I honestly miss that, that.
(29:56):
But it's kind of like a give ortake because I'm like and every
day I'm experiencing somethingnew, which is kind of crazy
because I've been in asia nowfor almost a year at different
places, but everywhere I goexperiencing something new.
You know, when I was in kualaLumpur it was entirely new,
entirely different, differentculture, different religions.
(30:16):
Those cultures bring a taste oftheir world in there.
You see that in thearchitecture, you taste it in
the food.
In Vietnam it's kind of crazybecause it's one of the most
friendly, freaking places I'veever been to and it's incredible
because you walk down thestreet and just morning they may
(30:40):
not know what you're saying,they just smile and kind of like
, okay, whatever, but it's great.
Yeah, absolutely love it.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I absolutely love living there.
Yeah, people have amisconception that Vietnam isn't
friendly, just obviouslybecause historically the the
previous you know the wars thatoccurred.
But it's it's everybody that Iknow that's traveled there has
had nothing but great reviewsfor it.
I enjoyed it immensely.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
I didn't know how it was going to be in a communist
country, especially, you know,being a Green Beret.
There's a different layer ofcomplexity there, don't get me
wrong.
They still remember, you know,but they know it's kind of like,
you know, when I was inPalestine, that they it's not
the people they absolutely loveme there.
(31:29):
So like I got him, like when Iwas in Palestine, they invited
me for coffee.
I had to add 20 minutes to mywalk everywhere I went because
someone would just say, hey,come over here, come, come, come
, welcome, come, sit down.
I was like, oh, thank you, Idon't drink coffee.
No, come sit, sit, please,please, sit.
(31:49):
Okay, it's that strong-asscoffee that's like a shot In,
know, and it's that strong as acoffee that's like a shot in
vietnam.
It's, it's beer, you know.
So everywhere I walked around,you know, and, and anytime in,
like any afternoon, like lateafternoon to evening, they were
just like, hey, you know, come,sit, chill.
You know, have beer, have beer.
I'm like, oh, okay, and uh,yeah, especially the more rare
(32:15):
that you are.
Like I did a trip up north,about an hour south of the
Chinese border, and literallypeople were getting out of their
seats to kind of see me, youknow, drive by with my little
moped, because I probably lookedlike a bear on a tricycle, but
you know.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
You want a moped?
Speaker 2 (32:30):
yes, I got a Vespa man.
I got a little Vespa.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
You got to send me a photo, so I can slap that in
here.
Just a yoked out hitter.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
The thing is man in Vietnam.
There's 11 million residents inSaigon, in Ho Chi Minh City,
and there's 9 million registeredmotorcycles.
The motorcycles have the rightof way everywhere you go, so
it's a lot safer than thanpeople think.
But it takes some time to getused to that.
You know what I mean.
But uh, it's, I love it, Iabsolutely love it.
(33:04):
Like at the stoplights they'rekind of like hey, what's going
on?
You know fist bumping, you knowjust beautiful.
But it's fun, it's,everything's easy.
It doesn't matter what you tryto get, you can get it delivered
.
Vietnam is easy, it's awesome.
Same thing with Laos.
Laos was very close to that andit's very modern, very modern.
(33:24):
I literally met Italians thatwere expats, that opened up
Italian restaurants there.
So you want Italian food, youcan literally have the best
Italian food there.
There's Argentinian steakhouses.
I met a Turkish guy that had aTurkish restaurant there best
owner kebab.
So I mean, anything you wantout there you can get.
It's incredible.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Do you feel like being, now that you're an expat,
a global citizen travelingaround?
Now that you're an expat, aglobal citizen traveling around,
do you feel that getting rid ofthe American way of life
mentality has helped you dealwith your own mental health?
Like?
You feel like less pressure ona daily basis?
Man.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
I think I got like 10 years back in my life.
It only feels that way.
It took me some months to kindof get out of that, because I've
always been the the like anyoneelse, especially in our
community, that they always haveto have like a goal to achieve,
you know, and the purpose likea drive, and you're always
moving with a purpose right.
You're always got like this ismy goal.
(34:28):
I got to get there, you know,this is my goal.
I got to get there, you know,regardless of what it is,
whether your job, whether itdoesn't matter what it is and
and it took me months, months toget out of that, you know.
And now it's just kind of likeyeah, I'll go, maybe I won't.
Yeah, sure, yeah, no, no, andit's, it doesn't.
(34:50):
It's one of those things whereit's hard to let go because
you've been so wired that way.
But once you actually undo it,it's very gratifying.
It's so relaxing and Iliterally feel like my sleep.
I haven't taken anything tosleep in a year and a half.
I sleep so well.
I haven't felt that I honestlyget like I haven't gotten like
(35:13):
seven hours of sleep, sleep.
I couldn't remember the lasttime I had seven hours of sleep
and there's sometimes even eightor nine hours, just kind of
crazy.
But most of the time I just getup when the sun comes up, you
know.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Yeah, that's amazing it's just honestly, one of the
best things you can do is likefinally dial in your sleep like,
like it's, and you know it andif you're listening you've
served.
Definitely understand that wealso.
We have this moniker of sleep'sa crutch and you have to earn
it, but it's the one thing youcan do consistently to improve
your brain health, your mood,your mental stability.
(35:47):
Just get real sleep.
Constantly being in a sleepdeficit is a great recipe for
psychotic break, for depression,for anxiety, and you don't have
to go on pharmaceuticals.
Just start by trying to figureout your sleep, man.
You don't have to travelthroughout Asia to start doing
that.
It's true.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Absolutely true.
And again, it's you know, and Ilive by this too, that the
whole nobody cares work harder.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, and I honestly look atthat, and the first thing that
comes to mind do you rememberthe Auschwitz?
There's the.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
Yes, work will set you free, yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
Yeah, for now, now that I've kind of like switched
over or switched off thatmentality, I look at it going
like to me they're almostidentical.
You know what I mean.
Because if some people just areslave to their job and they
will defend it, you know, withevery fiber in their being, and
they don't realize, like thedamage that it does.
(36:47):
And you know your family, yourfriends are much more important.
Your mental health is moreimportant.
There's so many things that aremore important than your
fucking job.
You know what I mean and don'tget me wrong, you need a job to
live and I get that.
But you know, for me I'vedefinitely become a minimalist
and realized, like how little Ireally need, and I think that's
(37:11):
one of the things that I'm soglad I got away from is because
we have, you know, thismentality that our social status
is determined by what we driveand the house that we have.
You know what I mean.
But it should be like how happyyou are and we just that's just
kind of like frowned upon, it'salmost looked at as like
weakness.
(37:31):
You know, yes, absolutely kindof frowned upon, it's almost
looked at as weakness.
Yes, I don't get that Now, Idon't get that Before it was
like everything, and so Iunderstand it.
And it took me and, just likeyou said, it doesn't require you
to leave the country andeverything else.
It just took me that it tookthat for me to leave, to
separate myself, in order torealize, like, how much damage I
(37:55):
was doing to myself.
You know, because if I wasn'tworking hard, just like you said
, yeah, I didn't earn my sleep.
You know, if I didn't work outhard enough, I didn't earn my
meals.
And I eat whenever the fuck Iwant now and it's, you know, I
don't feel bad about it, youknow I I actually I eat more and
I actually have lost weightbeing there, not just because of
(38:18):
the food, but, you know, thepreservatives and it's so much
healthier and everything's fresh.
That's the crazy part too.
Fast food restaurants they don'tfucking make it like.
You don't see McDonald's andBurger King.
You might have it like here andthere, but you don't see them
like that often, because ittakes so much less time and it's
so much more fresh for them tohave fresh baked bread, you know
(38:38):
, and they scramble the eggright there.
Even at the they have circle Ksthat they literally will
scramble eggs for you rightthere and put it in the sandwich
and everything else and makeyou like a breakfast sandwich,
and that's the thing is thatit's they shut down because it's
more expensive, and that's thething is that they shut down
because it's more expensive.
It doesn't taste as good butyou have that in the States as
well just not what you're usedto.
(39:00):
When you get accustomed tocertain patterns and when you
have your life, you get set inthat same mode and it becomes
repetitive.
But you become accustomed to itand so breaking away from that
takes time, you know, but it'sso much worth it if you take
that time to actually do it.
Stretching before I go to bedgot into yoga and that literally
(39:24):
helped me sleep, you know, butI never would have thought of
that like I needed that before.
It was just kind of things if Iget a chance to, now I
absolutely like need to, youknow, in order to get like
really good sleep, I need to dothat and it doesn't become like
something I have to do.
It's something I get to dobecause we all we're getting
into that point now where, youknow, I know that there's going
(39:46):
to be a day coming where I can't, can't lift anymore.
You know what I mean.
I don't know when it's going tohappen and I'm making sure I I
can do that as long as I can,but right now I, my mentality,
has changed.
It's very simple I get to dothis, versus before I have to do
this.
You know what I mean.
And that made a monumentalchange in my life.
(40:09):
It truly did just changing thatmentality in my head.
Going and I have to get to thegym.
No, I get to go to the gym, Iget to go do this.
I get to go on.
I get to go swim, I get to gofucking hiking, I get to do all
these things.
I get to do that.
I don't have to do any of it,but I get to and I want to.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
It's fucking wise.
That's.
That's the reality.
If we stop looking ateverything in our day-to-day
life as a burden, as a task,that's a big shift.
A lot of us have that.
Many of you are programmingtime to hold your kids and the
alarm goes off and you're fuck,I got to go Life's short.
Nothing's guaranteed.
You don't know what's going tohappen tomorrow.
When you get in your car, godforbid you're not met with some
catastrophe that takes somethingaway from you that you can't do
(41:08):
Like.
Walk, focus on the good in yourlife and understand that it
might seem like a pain in theass, but the real pain in the
ass is you sitting therethinking that tomorrow's
guaranteed, like that's.
That's the ultimate greatestmind.
Fuck is if you continue tobelieve that, because nothing's
guaranteed, you gotta be able tolook at the blessings you got
(41:29):
today.
That's why gratitude's soimportant, man.
I'm sure you understand thatmore than anybody, right?
Speaker 2 (41:34):
now.
There was an article I readabout a CEO a few years ago, but
one of the most things thatmade an impact on me was and he
was a multi-billionaire and hewas like the one thing I say
there's never been a point intime that I've been ill and he
knew he was about to pass.
He had a short time left that Ithought about I should have had
(42:00):
.
You know, I wish I would havehad more overtime or wish I
would have worked more.
You know what I mean and justthat I was like holy shit, you
know, and you know sometimes itcould be just that one passage
in a paragraph that hits youhard.
And, man, one of the thingsthat I learned more than
anything is like to my friendsand I'll tell them, I love them
to make it to the point whereit's uncomfortable.
(42:20):
I was like I love you, brother.
You know what I mean and I gotno problem saying that because
you know, the last thing I wantto do is this will be the last
time I talk to them and I nevertold them and that to me would.
I would carry that for the restof my life.
You know what I mean.
Rather than I got no problemtelling people that you know I
care about them.
I'll do anything for them, my,my family, my friends.
(42:43):
That, to me is, is the priority,you know.
And in order for me to takecare of them the best I can, I
have to be, you know, healthy.
I have to be, you know, in astrong mental capacity.
That needs to be if they needsupport, you know, and they do
the same thing.
So those have become mypriorities now and again.
(43:05):
I don't have the big fancy car.
I got a little moped and I lovemy Vespa.
That's really all I need.
You know what I mean, becauseI'm so happy.
I literally wake up with asmile on my face and I'm just
like I fucking love this, I lovethis, and so I'm going to keep
doing that for as long as I can.
Speaker 1 (43:25):
You know the status symbols don't mean much if you
live a life devoid of being ofservice and helping other people
.
It's all about going into thisnext chapter of your life as
listening service membersanybody out there honestly Make
sure your life is built more onthe things that you're doing for
others, the kindness, thegenerosity, the great things
(43:47):
you're experiencing with yourfamily and friends.
Make that the lavish thing inyour life.
Like, look, I get it.
It'd be nice to have thatfrigging awesome, flashy car,
but what good is it if it's byyourself?
Focus on the good you can bringfor other people.
(44:08):
Be a mentor, be of service toothers.
Be good to people around you.
Trust me, that has more impacton the world around you and it
will be far more rewarding lateron in life than grinding away
in work culture trying to getthat fancy-ass car.
It looks cool.
I can't tell you that itdoesn't look cool, but I will
tell you that you will be morehappy if you surround yourself
with good people.
(44:28):
Focus on your family and focuson what you can do for somebody
else.
Alan, I can't thank you forjoining me today, man.
It's been awesome diving inyour story.
What's next for you?
What's the next adventure, man?
Speaker 2 (44:39):
actually you got just more countries I haven't been
to.
So there's a festival in BhutanI'm going to.
There's a like a horse trekking, I'm trying to get someone
Mongolian wrestling.
And when I go to Mongolia, justI've literally been kind of
digging into some of thefestivals.
There's one in Japan, there'sanother one in Indonesia.
(44:59):
Still got to go to thePhilippines and work my way from
there.
I still haven't been to Africa,anywhere in Africa.
So I definitely want to gothere.
Speaker 1 (45:11):
I've got a guy I link up with, you can link up with.
I can help you, provide you ona proper wildlife safari.
Shout out to my boy, kevin Pip,former SF guy doing great
things in South Africa.
I'll plug him out there.
If you're looking for a guidedtour of the bush wild works, has
got you.
I'll get you guys connected.
Uh, cause he's fucking awesome.
(45:32):
And yeah, I'd like to see twoGreen Berets link up and down
under Africa and do some funstuff.
Yeah, man, you're, you'reliving testament what we got to
be willing to do.
Man, break away from the matrixand go explore, maybe not
forever, maybe not breakcompletely off.
I know I'm proud American, Ilike living here and I'm
grounded here.
I have a little one I like toraise here.
(45:52):
But if you're adventurous andyou're ready to go, do something
big, go travel, follow Alan'sfootprints.
Alan, if people want to followyou, where can they go?
Speaker 2 (46:02):
I'm on Instagram, on Facebook, just Alan Shibarro or
AlanShibarro.
I think Facebook is easier tofind too.
Speaker 1 (46:09):
Heck, yeah, go ahead and pause.
Go to episode, episodedescription.
Those links will be there.
As long as for uh links or howyou can support the show, I'll
leave us a comment or two.
Give us a positive review.
I'd really appreciate it.
Go to spotify, apple podcastand youtube subscribe.
You know the whole spiel.
I'm dan caballero.
Thank you for tuning in, alan.
Thanks again.
We'll see y'all next time,appreciate it.
right how you doing brother any better.
Couldn't stand myself right on,man dude I.
I love finding veterans that uh, are hard at work and sticking
to something that bringsdiscipline in their life and can
help inspire others.
And what better way to do itthan continuing that lifelong
commitment of excellence bydoing something hard every
(00:28):
single day?
And when you look and find yourpage on social media, it's
nothing but a catalog of thatdoing hard shit every single day
.
So today, man, I want to tapinto your story, not just the
great accolades you've done inyour service, but where you
found success on the transition.
You and I both know that wecontinue to lose our brothers,
(00:48):
even within special operations.
We have this myth that our guyscan't break and sadly that's
not true.
But tapping into your story toshare the things that go right,
the things that work, that ledyou down this path of success
and, yeah, I want to explorethat today with you Awesome, so
it actually started from hittingrock bottom, led you down this
path of success and uh, yeah, Iwant to explore that today with
you.
Awesome, so it actually itactually started from hitting
(01:10):
rock bottom.
Yep, as often, more often thannot, that's the way it starts,
yeah.
Speaker 2 (01:15):
I mean to the point where.
See about, I got out of activeduty in 2010.
I was national guard for acouple of years, um out in 2010.
I was National Guard for acouple years out in Texas with
19th Group.
In 2010, in May, I opened up myown gym in McKinney and I just
(01:45):
dove into that headfirst, justtrying to get up and going.
I've never opened up, I neverhad a business period, so I was
literally learning as I wentalong and I didn't have a plan B
.
Just I was going to make thiswork, no matter what.
The problem was is that I waslike super busy.
I just wasn't very productiveand I already had issues that I
just didn't realize I had.
(02:05):
There wasn't anything that wasgoing to keep me from succeeding
.
That became kind of a problembecause I couldn't read the
signs.
I was going full force andbasically it just went from.
I was teaching five, sixclasses a day, waking up at like
4.30 and teaching a a 6 amclass, and then 9 am class, noon
(02:27):
class, afternoon class likearound 4 30, and then one after
that and another jiu-jitsu oneafter that, and then another
fitness one after that, and thenI'd get right back on the
computer and try to figure out,you know, google ads and like,
literally like business fordummies.
I was literally living in mygym for 18 months on the couch,
(02:50):
because I felt that it was a,the sacrifice was worth it.
I can have an apartment or Ican make this business work.
Okay, let me just sleep on thecouch, I'm good.
The problem was is that I didn'teven recognize, like, all the
things that were wrong.
I just kept dismissing them andthen I started kind of
(03:11):
developing injuries.
But I had to teach and I had to, you know, and I felt like I
needed to be a leader and thatmeans that I had to be first in
line first, you know, first upfront with the highest lifting,
with the fastest times.
I was still competing injuiu-jitsu and I was just
wearing myself thin and runningon red line for years.
And it started out where I wastaking like one Ambien in the
(03:36):
morning and then 20 milligramsof Adderall in the morning to
within a few years, I was taking, waking up and taking 30
milligrams in the morning, 30milligrams around noon and then
30 milligrams in the afternoon,like late in the evening, and I
just kept pushing and then, inorder to fall asleep with all
(03:56):
that dosage.
I went from taking one Ambiento taking two Ambien, percocet
and Washington Down, you know,with a six-pack of beer, and of
course I only slept for likethree hours, yeah, but it was
three hours that I could, theonly three hours that I could
get, and it just everyone's gota limit.
(04:22):
And what I didn't realize was,you know, we're all used to
physical injuries and we canjust kind of like, okay, this is
what's wrong, I can fix it or Ican just walk it off.
But when it becomes like mentalissues and that's what I was
dealing with I didn't know whatthe signs, symptoms, you know,
it was just yeah, I'm sad, justbrush it off.
(04:44):
You know, it was just yeah, I'msad, just brush it off.
And um, when you startrationalizing irrational
thoughts, that's what got me andbefore you know, it starts
spiraling down into theseirrational thoughts of failure
and just absolute, likecatastrophe and everything that
I'm doing and it's coming frommy own mind.
How do you fix that?
You know, and I mean, it justgot to the point where I just
(05:06):
hit rock bottom in 2014 or 2015one of the two I almost shot
myself and kind of got lucky onthat.
I actually had a dog that keptlike bugging the shit out of me
and uh, kept pawing me, man likeon my hand, and I remember just
(05:29):
kicking the shit out of him andhe went like halfway across the
room and then he came rightback and kept doing the same
thing and I felt like such afucking shit back, sorry um no,
you can cuss all day, every day,on this, this show.
I just felt so like honestlylike it just like such a shit
bag for kicking my dog and Ilove that dog, it was like the
(05:50):
best dog I ever had and that'swhat actually pulled me away
from what I was doing.
So after that, you know, Iactually started to seek help
and realize that there wassomething wrong and I needed to
kind of get something and get itfixed.
And around that time I met JoeyBozic and he was a triple
amputee.
He was in Iraq, he got hit withan IED as an MP and you know he
(06:14):
came in first.
First he came in to kind of vetme because the original name of
my gym was tier one trainingfacility and he's like, oh, it's
probably one of those of thoseyou know jackasses that just
uses the name.
So we got to talking and youknow he was, he was at brag, you
know I was at brag and westarted kind of talking and
before I knew it we actuallyknew some of the same people and
he had come in to to actuallyget lessons for his daughter.
(06:37):
And then the conversation, um,kind of spiraled into.
You know, like, have you of,you know, doing jiu-jitsu
yourself?
He's like, well, you know, Itried it before, because he was
actually a martial artist beforehe got into jiu-jitsu, like
when he had all his limbs.
He spent a lifetime in it.
So I was like man, I've neverdone this, but if you're willing
(07:02):
to be patient with me, I'll bepatient with you, we can work
something out.
And I was like, just come uptomorrow, we'll see what we got.
And after one session everythingwas just so like complex.
But it was such a reliefbecause it was so different and
it really took my mind offthings and I really was able to
focus just on that.
(07:23):
It really took my mind offthings and I really was able to
focus just on that, and I wrotedown like eight pages of notes
and I had to scrap like six ofthem because I didn't know about
the muscle flap being over.
He has like titanium rods forfemurs and so the flap's over so
he can roll over it but hecan't push off of it, which
means like the center core isdifferent for movements.
And then he had one leg longerthan the other.
(07:45):
His arm was amputated justbelow the elbow.
He had partial rotation in onearm but not in the other, and so
but there was two pages that Iliterally could work.
And so we started from there andI was like, cool man, come back
tomorrow.
And he's like what, come backtomorrow, man, we'll keep
working on it.
And so we just workedone-on-one for for a few months,
(08:08):
like about four or five months,three, three days a week on
average, damn and um.
And then one day we're sittingin the corner of the mat and
just trying to talk and and andlike what kind of therapy would
work for the shit that's wrongwith them physically or mentally
, because I know this shit worksfor me and obviously it's
(08:30):
working for you, so why don't wetry to come up with something?
And so that's how we came upwith the idea for we Defy
Foundation and we're going on 10years now.
I think the number's up toabout 1,800 veterans to the
program.
That's remarkable work.
(08:51):
Yeah, it's amazing.
I'm so proud of being able tostart it.
But the people that have beenable to kind of take over
because, again, you know, joeyand I never had worked at a
nonprofit, never had any cluehow to do any of this and we're
just trying to figure it out aswe go, and I remember like we
(09:14):
were doing seminars to raisemoney for that, and it cost
about $2,000 for people to runthrough the program.
Because what we do is we find ajob, um, an academy, a
jiu-jitsu academy, that'swanting to become an affiliate,
and it doesn't matter.
You know what flag they fly.
And then, once we approve thefacility, we recommend a veteran
(09:35):
to them.
So what ends up happening is um, they go up, they show up.
As long as they show up forthree times a week, we'll pay
for the tuition, their gi, gi,their belt, their rash guard,
everything they need to getstarted, and so all they have to
do is show up.
And the amazing part about thatis that it was we didn't
realize, like how much how thecorrelation between military and
(09:58):
jujitsu was.
I mean, we have thatcamaraderie.
We have a ranking system.
We have, you know it's, it's acombat sport, right, but it's
also something that makes youthink a lot.
Thanks to social media, peopleare held accountable, you know,
because if you don't have atraining partner, well, there's
someone that's going to besitting out, and so we have
(10:21):
mentors.
Now we have affiliates in all50 states.
I think we're up to like 700 or800 affiliates, including in
Japan, guam, puerto Rico, up inAlaska everywhere Damn, it's
(10:42):
just blown up.
So four years, I was thedirector and the vice president,
and also the international, andwhat grew out of it was in 2017
, I went to England and met witha Royal Marine Commando.
He'd been kind of following mesince the inception of it and we
(11:06):
started talking and I gave himlike the full blueprint.
This is what we did.
This is how we did it.
This is how we started.
This is the things you got tolook out for.
They ended up starting Reorg,so Reorg Jiu-Jitsu Foundation.
Now it's developed into ReorgCharity, but that's actually how
Tom Hardy got into jiu-jitsu,was meeting through them and two
(11:27):
years later, I get a messagefrom Scott Steer, who was in the
Australian Army, and then westarted Veterans Grappling, so
it was able to spawn off todifferent countries.
The same idea run a little bitdifferent due to the
circumstances of you know.
However, the nonprofit works,the laws work, but the idea and
(11:48):
the concept itself was able tokind of take the blueprint and
make it work for where you're atIn 2023, there's going to be
I'm not sure where they're atwith it, but they started, they
got the approval to start a weDefy Foundation Canada.
Wow, hell.
Yeah, I was able to really keepit going and spread it out by
2019.
I was getting burned out and,um, I had to step down from the
(12:11):
board, but the staff that thatthat took over has done such an
amazing job with everything.
It was able to take it out fromthat, from there, and just
continue the growth of it towhere we're at today, and I
couldn't be any more proud ofthem for what they've done.
They've just done a phenomenaljob that's a testament of what.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
What can happen when you're able to pause like a lot
of times we get stuck in our ownsuffering, we can sit down and
let it eat us up and we just sitthere and it will deteriorate
you faster than anything.
But through a chance encounterit took you out of that and
brought you out of your ownsphere.
And then you saw somebody else.
(12:53):
And we don't want to comparetrauma, we don't want to compare
.
Somebody's got worse than me,no, but you're able to see
somebody else that's missing arm, missing legs.
How can I help you?
How can I help you get some joy, get a little bit of respite
from what you're dealing with?
And that nexus being able toconnect with a human being
(13:14):
that's what's really helping alot of people and we don't focus
.
There's a lot of interventionsout there that do a lot of great
care, but all in all, we'rehuman beings, we're meant to
connect.
What's that friendship like?
Today, you guys still connected, you guys still do this stuff
together um, not so much, um,not for any other.
Speaker 2 (13:33):
I mean, we're still keeping contact, of course, but,
um, I sold my gym, uh, lastyear and I just had kind of a
calling.
I guess I was raised overseasgrowing up, so I actually lived
(13:55):
in Italy and Germany and Austriaand Saudi Arabia, and so I
didn't actually move to theStates until I was 19.
Wow, when I was 95.
And then I, just after 14 yearsof owning a gym a gym is like
taking care of an infant for theentire time that you're there
you always got to be there.
So it's a lot of responsibility, it's a lot of hard work, but
(14:16):
if you love doing it, I meanthere's so much benefit that
comes out of it.
And I got no regrets for what Idid.
But I felt like I needed to dosomething else.
Man, I had um within one month.
I was just reaching out to someyou know some people and, kind
of that, lost contact with them,like, hey, man, how you been?
(14:37):
He's like man I got, I gotcancer and I was like holy shit,
dude, you're like 53.
You know what I mean.
And then I talked to anotherone and he got cancer.
So three guys that I knew all,all of them like less than five
years older than me, you knowgot some type of cancer and I
was like dude, fuck this, dude,I'm Papa Tuck.
There's like so much shit inthe world that I haven't seen so
(14:57):
I, literally I, sold my gym.
Three weeks later I was on aflight and I took off and
started in England and then Iwent to visit my best friend in
Germany and went down.
My mother lives in Italy and soI went and visited her, then
went to.
I went and visited her, thenwent to the West Bank for a
couple of months, was in Jordanfor a little bit, turned around,
(15:22):
came back to the States for afew weeks and then headed out to
Thailand.
I was there for a bit, and thenVietnam for a month and then
Laos for a month, came back downto Vietnam because I absolutely
loved it, and then down toMalaysia and back to then
(15:44):
Cambodia.
I absolutely fell in love withVietnam and Ho Chi Minh City,
and so that's actually my homebase.
Now, what about in Vietnam city?
Speaker 1 (15:53):
exactly, and so that's actually my home base now
.
So there's, I got a trip out ofvietnam, that's something.
Uh, you know, that's uh, wegotta dive in that for a little
bit man.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
So I got really lucky , like everywhere that I went in
laos, I was in vietnam and, um,I absolutely love that place.
It's amazing and just the, theculture, the food, just all the
food, everything about it.
It was just and it was.
I was, don't get me wrong, Iwasn't like staying at the Ritz
or anything.
You know, I was staying at alot of the places you know where
(16:23):
.
Just, I rent an apartment forlike a month and it's, you know,
relatively inexpensive.
Speaker 1 (16:28):
Doing the old Green Beret thing, living off the
local economy.
Speaker 2 (16:33):
Yeah, it's amazing.
Um, the street food.
I, I fell in love with thestreet food.
I just I couldn't get enough.
And the the weird part is isthat you know, most of it's like
there's no preservatives, orpretty much all of it's no
preservatives, no, and and youcan eat healthy just as much for
a fraction of the price.
(16:53):
Yeah, and just being able toexperience something new is what
I really kind of fell in lovewith, and that's a part of the
world that, like I've never beento spend a lot of time to in
that area Islands, like inBangkok, it's.
It's beautiful, don't get mewrong, but it's kind of like
(17:14):
Vegas.
It's beautiful, don't get mewrong, but it's kind of like
Vegas, you know, it'soverwhelming, you know, so you
can only take it.
For so long I wanted to go toChiang Mai, which is up north,
but I picked the time framewhere it's like everything was
flooded, so that's how I endedup going straight to Vietnam
after that and then I was inHanoi for a month and man, that
(17:36):
place is just crazy wild and Iliterally would just my favorite
thing to do, honestly, wasliterally just go walk out of my
apartment.
I'm like, okay, I've been hereand just I'd walk west and just
see where it took me, you, Ijust walked the streets and you
know, stop and eat some pho.
(17:56):
You know, just out of nowhere,bumble way, there's all these
different foods that I've neverhad, and and again, I just 20
bucks maybe for the day and I'deat like five, six meals.
Everyone was just very curious,you know.
So the area that I staying at,there weren't many white expats
there, so a lot of people werejust kind of like staring.
(18:17):
Laos, the same thing.
Cambodia I was actually on thecoastline of Cambodia and that
was one of the more recent tripswhen I was in Vietnam, when I
went down to Saigon.
Actually I don't have a workvisa, so what I did instead was
I was raising money for like oneof the orphanages there.
So when I went to Cambodia, Iwanted to kind of get involved
(18:39):
with the human trafficking andthings like that.
So I met some people from anonprofit.
They showed me around there andamazing people, the program
they have there.
I spent like a week just kindof seeing the whole operation.
It's truly phenomenal what theydo with so little and they make
(19:03):
it work and it's and it'sabsolutely amazing the um, the
care that they put, the, theamount of, uh, just everything
about it, like how caring theyare.
It's just, it's incredible yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:11):
Did you go there thinking that you were going to
get involved with this fight ordid it just kind of opportunity
just opened up?
It just?
Speaker 2 (19:18):
there's, no, there's nothing greater than to help
someone in need, right,absolutely, and so anywhere that
I can help somebody in any way,you know, whether it be
training jujitsu and justshowing them stuff to help their
game, or just bringing moreattention and awareness to a
certain organization that I knowis doing well, I'm more than
happy to do it and it doesn'tcost me anything.
(19:39):
You know what I mean.
I'm just kind of like I havesomewhat of a following and you
know.
So I try to sort of just expose, like you know, give some
exposure to to some like honest,good organizations, you know,
to some honest, goodorganizations.
So, yeah, there's a couple morethat I want to go to, like in
(19:59):
Vietnam there's some of thepeople that were affected by the
Agent Orange, likegenerationally.
Yeah, I'll try to go up thereand see what we can do, because
they recently got their USAIDpulled, so we're talking a lot
of people with physical defectsand so forth from.
(20:20):
I mean, they have 68,000 hectaacres that's still contaminated,
wow, so it's kind of crazy.
And you don't think about thesethings in the States because
everything's so far away, we'reso isolated in the States.
Because everything's so faraway, we're so isolated, I don't
have a work visa.
I was literally talking tosomeone about this today.
My schedule is literally like Iget up when the sun gets up, I
(20:43):
go walk outside or I go to thegym, it doesn't matter.
Whenever I feel like it, I goget my coconut which is like
within 100 feet and theyliterally chop it right there
and I'm just sipping on thecoconut juice.
Go get some fresh squeezedorange juice, a couple of banh
mi sandwiches, you know stuffwith some eggs and liver pate
(21:08):
and all the good stuff, and hangout at a cafe, chill out for
like an hour, come back, gotrain, then come back from there
and go hang out at the pool.
I mean, it's a hard life.
It's a hard life, it's awonderful life right now.
I got no complaints.
I got a trip to Bhutanscheduled in October.
I'm going to Mongolia, all theplaces.
(21:28):
I've never been man Life's tooshort, I still got my health.
I can do things that are active.
Been man life's too short, Istill got my health.
I can do things that are active.
Speaker 1 (21:36):
I'm gonna take advantage of that for as long as
I can there's something to besaid about that man.
There's a lot of people settleinto this idea of this work
culture where, like you know,I'm a victim of it too.
I'm victim of this mentality ofjust working non-stop the grind
, the grind, the grind.
And then you realize the yeargoes by really fucking fast, and
then two years, three years,four years, five years.
(21:57):
When are you making time foryourself?
When are you like?
Projects are great, thebusiness is great, achieving
things are great, but fuck atrophy, fuck the achievement
Life.
Life is the ultimate thing thatyou need to be worried about.
What are you doing with yourfamily, with your kids?
Do you want them to onlyremember you at 5 pm, when you
(22:19):
walk into the door as a ghostthat tiptoes through the house,
leaving at 430?
Got to have a life, got to makeit happen.
I'm saying this because I needto hear it myself.
Speaker 2 (22:30):
I mean like right before, like during COVID it was
one of the catalysts why I soldthe gym is we had to shut down
for several months.
I was still paying my employees, I was still paying rent and,
man, I managed to get myself inlike so much debt from that.
And trying to recover that,trying to get students back and
try to get back up there, Iended up taking a corporate job
(22:50):
as a project manager for aplumbing company.
It was my first corporate jobI'd ever done and I was making
good money.
Don't get me wrong.
But I was waking up at 5 am,going to the gym for some type
of workout like 45 minutesbecause I had a shower, get back
to work and then I'd be workingthere from 7.30 to noon, then
(23:13):
go teach, come back to work andthen get off work around 5, you
know enough time to go eat, comeback, teach again, get home
like around 8.30.
And I was married at the time,so she was stressed out because
I was only spending like acouple hours at night and by the
time, you know, I got home, allI wanted to do was just chill
out and she's about to go tosleep.
(23:34):
Then the weekend comes, theonly thing I want to do is sleep
.
So it really made things rough.
And what I realized is that twoand a half years of working at
that job, yeah, I was able tomake the money to pay off all my
bills and pay off my debt.
But what I realized is thatthose entire two and a half
(23:55):
years was literally like anamalgam of one week, like I
couldn't separate the days, Icouldn't separate everything,
because all I was doing lookingat computer screen, going to job
sites, and they all looked thesame.
And then realized that you knowwe work, you know eight to 10
hours a day to get two days off,and then for two weeks a year
(24:18):
you have time off and to me andit could be perfect for other
people, I'm not, I'm not, it'sjust not for me.
You know what I mean.
If that's what you'd like to do, and you know, by all means, I
just I realized that it's justnot for me and I quit that job
and that's when I started kindof like pursuing this and then,
(24:38):
a year later, I just said, no, Igot to go now.
And that's when I popped smokeand left.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
At the end of the day , you got to do what's right for
you.
You got to figure out what'sright.
And you mentioned the cancerepidemic that we're going
through and hearing your friendslike, yeah, and it's shocking
Guys in their 40s too gettingcancer To think that you can go
(25:05):
out just like that withoutexperiencing life and seeing
things.
It's a no brainer.
You got to explore.
It's a no brainer.
You gotta explore that.
Do you feel a longing or asense of like missing out on?
You know the things back homein the state or you know things
going on in stateside, cause Ican imagine there there's gotta
be, there's gotta be some peopleyou miss back in the mainland.
(25:27):
Oh yeah.
Speaker 2 (25:28):
The people that I I mean I love my brothers that are
back home.
I definitely miss them.
The people that I I mean I lovemy brothers that are back home,
I definitely miss them.
There's people back at homethat I definitely miss.
I miss riding.
I used to.
I got into horse riding andcutting event and after I did my
first event I got so addictedto it and the coach that I had
(25:49):
has been working at a ranch.
He's like hey, do you want tocome over?
Yes, yes, I do.
Yes, I do you want to come over?
Yes, yes, I do, yes, Iabsolutely do.
And so I would drive fromMcKinney to Weatherford, which
is like about an hour and a halfalmost an hour and 45 minutes
one way, and I absolutely lovedit, like I would look forward to
it.
I loved like going out thereand we just moved cows from one
pen to the other and it trulywas.
(26:16):
Just.
If you want to talk abouttherapy, that's the only thing
that I found that's matchedjiu-jitsu, for therapy is the
equine therapy, and if anyonewants to do that, I would so
highly recommend it.
It is absolutely incredible.
It's amazing.
I got truly lucky meeting thepeople that I did, and he just
kept inviting me out.
I kept saying yes, so hecouldn't get rid of me.
The whole time I was there andthat's something I don't have in
Asia.
You don't have cutting, youdon't have the same type of
(26:40):
ranches.
We don't have the sameconnections Not yet.
So I'm still working on it, butwe'll see yeah, who taught you
how to cut?
what's that?
Speaker 1 (26:51):
he taught you how to cut, how to go.
Uh, learn how to cut so july of2023.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
I get a friend of mine that I've known from
jiu-jitsu, that I've known forlike 20 years and he ended up
being the president of the nhcaand he's like, hey, we're doing
this uh cutting event, militarycutting challenge.
Do you want to be a part of?
Like yes, anything that has todo with veterans and helping
them out?
I'm in, and so he starts kindof describing what we're doing
and everything.
And then, yeah, so 10 minuteslater, I'm just like wait, you,
(27:22):
you want me to ride?
He's like, yeah, man, I'm like,dude, I've never ridden a horse
.
He's like, oh, you'll be fine.
I was like holy shit, okay.
And then I started looking upYouTube and I'm like cutting,
cutting horses, horses, cutting.
And I'm like holy shit, dude,those things are fast.
And I always had like this.
(27:43):
I always thought horses werelike majestic, right Next to
elephants.
I think they're the mostmajestic creatures on this
planet, but I had this respectfor them like you stay over
there, you'd be beautiful, andI'll stay over here, we'll just
keep our distance, you know,yeah, and then, because they're
massive, you know, but a goodfriend of mine, larry, he has a
(28:06):
ranch and he's like man, we needto get you on horse if you're
going to be doing this event.
So there's a picture and I'mliterally on the horse and he's
like you got to kick it.
I'm like, fuck you, dude,there's no way I'm kicking this
thing.
So I'm literally just like onthe fence and just kind of like
just hanging out, like am Idoing?
All right, you know it's notmoving the horse, kind of
(28:26):
looking back, kind of likewaiting, and I'm just like, no,
I'm good, we're good, we're goodlike this, this is really good.
And then until, like, thetrainer came up and grabbed the
reins and, kind of like, walkedme around, like it was like a
kiss, but he taught me how tolike approach a horse.
When you walk around it, yougot to keep contact and you know
how to put on a saddle and allthese small things that I had no
(28:50):
clue about.
And then a week later, I didthat cutting event and it was
like a competition, but it'slike a fundraiser, so it's not
like rated or anything, and Iended up getting third.
I just absolutely loved it.
And there were other veteransspecial operations veterans that
(29:11):
were there too, rangers and sf,and then we had the navy guy as
well.
And so they do it annually nowand it's a military cutting
challenge.
If anyone interested in that,it's a phenomenal, absolutely
phenomenal deal that they have.
You know they take care of them, they go and take them to a
range to take them coaching andI'm talking like the best in the
freaking world.
You cutting coaches and you getexposed to something entirely
(29:35):
new For me.
It changed my life so I can'tthank these guys enough.
So Jay Winborn was the guy thatgot me involved and then Bruce
Maureen was my coach that keptbringing me to the ranch and
coached me through that twicebut honestly it was
life-changing.
So I miss that.
I honestly miss that, that.
(29:56):
But it's kind of like a give ortake because I'm like and every
day I'm experiencing somethingnew, which is kind of crazy
because I've been in asia nowfor almost a year at different
places, but everywhere I goexperiencing something new.
You know, when I was in kualaLumpur it was entirely new,
entirely different, differentculture, different religions.
(30:16):
Those cultures bring a taste oftheir world in there.
You see that in thearchitecture, you taste it in
the food.
In Vietnam it's kind of crazybecause it's one of the most
friendly, freaking places I'veever been to and it's incredible
because you walk down thestreet and just morning they may
(30:40):
not know what you're saying,they just smile and kind of like
, okay, whatever, but it's great.
Yeah, absolutely love it.
Speaker 1 (30:50):
I absolutely love living there.
Yeah, people have amisconception that Vietnam isn't
friendly, just obviouslybecause historically the the
previous you know the wars thatoccurred.
But it's it's everybody that Iknow that's traveled there has
had nothing but great reviewsfor it.
I enjoyed it immensely.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
I didn't know how it was going to be in a communist
country, especially, you know,being a Green Beret.
There's a different layer ofcomplexity there, don't get me
wrong.
They still remember, you know,but they know it's kind of like,
you know, when I was inPalestine, that they it's not
the people they absolutely loveme there.
(31:29):
So like I got him, like when Iwas in Palestine, they invited
me for coffee.
I had to add 20 minutes to mywalk everywhere I went because
someone would just say, hey,come over here, come, come, come
, welcome, come, sit down.
I was like, oh, thank you, Idon't drink coffee.
No, come sit, sit, please,please, sit.
(31:49):
Okay, it's that strong-asscoffee that's like a shot In,
know, and it's that strong as acoffee that's like a shot in
vietnam.
It's, it's beer, you know.
So everywhere I walked around,you know, and, and anytime in,
like any afternoon, like lateafternoon to evening, they were
just like, hey, you know, come,sit, chill.
You know, have beer, have beer.
I'm like, oh, okay, and uh,yeah, especially the more rare
(32:15):
that you are.
Like I did a trip up north,about an hour south of the
Chinese border, and literallypeople were getting out of their
seats to kind of see me, youknow, drive by with my little
moped, because I probably lookedlike a bear on a tricycle, but
you know.
Speaker 1 (32:29):
You want a moped?
Speaker 2 (32:30):
yes, I got a Vespa man.
I got a little Vespa.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
You got to send me a photo, so I can slap that in
here.
Just a yoked out hitter.
Speaker 2 (32:41):
The thing is man in Vietnam.
There's 11 million residents inSaigon, in Ho Chi Minh City,
and there's 9 million registeredmotorcycles.
The motorcycles have the rightof way everywhere you go, so
it's a lot safer than thanpeople think.
But it takes some time to getused to that.
You know what I mean.
But uh, it's, I love it, Iabsolutely love it.
(33:04):
Like at the stoplights they'rekind of like hey, what's going
on?
You know fist bumping, you knowjust beautiful.
But it's fun, it's,everything's easy.
It doesn't matter what you tryto get, you can get it delivered
.
Vietnam is easy, it's awesome.
Same thing with Laos.
Laos was very close to that andit's very modern, very modern.
(33:24):
I literally met Italians thatwere expats, that opened up
Italian restaurants there.
So you want Italian food, youcan literally have the best
Italian food there.
There's Argentinian steakhouses.
I met a Turkish guy that had aTurkish restaurant there best
owner kebab.
So I mean, anything you wantout there you can get.
It's incredible.
Speaker 1 (33:47):
Do you feel like being, now that you're an expat,
a global citizen travelingaround?
Now that you're an expat, aglobal citizen traveling around,
do you feel that getting rid ofthe American way of life
mentality has helped you dealwith your own mental health?
Like?
You feel like less pressure ona daily basis?
Man.
Speaker 2 (34:07):
I think I got like 10 years back in my life.
It only feels that way.
It took me some months to kindof get out of that, because I've
always been the the like anyoneelse, especially in our
community, that they always haveto have like a goal to achieve,
you know, and the purpose likea drive, and you're always
moving with a purpose right.
You're always got like this ismy goal.
(34:28):
I got to get there, you know,this is my goal.
I got to get there, you know,regardless of what it is,
whether your job, whether itdoesn't matter what it is and
and it took me months, months toget out of that, you know.
And now it's just kind of likeyeah, I'll go, maybe I won't.
Yeah, sure, yeah, no, no, andit's, it doesn't.
(34:50):
It's one of those things whereit's hard to let go because
you've been so wired that way.
But once you actually undo it,it's very gratifying.
It's so relaxing and Iliterally feel like my sleep.
I haven't taken anything tosleep in a year and a half.
I sleep so well.
I haven't felt that I honestlyget like I haven't gotten like
(35:13):
seven hours of sleep, sleep.
I couldn't remember the lasttime I had seven hours of sleep
and there's sometimes even eightor nine hours, just kind of
crazy.
But most of the time I just getup when the sun comes up, you
know.
Speaker 1 (35:25):
Yeah, that's amazing it's just honestly, one of the
best things you can do is likefinally dial in your sleep like,
like it's, and you know it andif you're listening you've
served.
Definitely understand that wealso.
We have this moniker of sleep'sa crutch and you have to earn
it, but it's the one thing youcan do consistently to improve
your brain health, your mood,your mental stability.
(35:47):
Just get real sleep.
Constantly being in a sleepdeficit is a great recipe for
psychotic break, for depression,for anxiety, and you don't have
to go on pharmaceuticals.
Just start by trying to figureout your sleep, man.
You don't have to travelthroughout Asia to start doing
that.
It's true.
Speaker 2 (36:07):
Absolutely true.
And again, it's you know, and Ilive by this too, that the
whole nobody cares work harder.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, and I honestly look atthat, and the first thing that
comes to mind do you rememberthe Auschwitz?
There's the.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
Yes, work will set you free, yeah.
Speaker 2 (36:27):
Yeah, for now, now that I've kind of like switched
over or switched off thatmentality, I look at it going
like to me they're almostidentical.
You know what I mean.
Because if some people just areslave to their job and they
will defend it, you know, withevery fiber in their being, and
they don't realize, like thedamage that it does.
(36:47):
And you know your family, yourfriends are much more important.
Your mental health is moreimportant.
There's so many things that aremore important than your
fucking job.
You know what I mean and don'tget me wrong, you need a job to
live and I get that.
But you know, for me I'vedefinitely become a minimalist
and realized, like how little Ireally need, and I think that's
(37:11):
one of the things that I'm soglad I got away from is because
we have, you know, thismentality that our social status
is determined by what we driveand the house that we have.
You know what I mean.
But it should be like how happyyou are and we just that's just
kind of like frowned upon, it'salmost looked at as like
weakness.
(37:31):
You know, yes, absolutely kindof frowned upon, it's almost
looked at as weakness.
Yes, I don't get that Now, Idon't get that Before it was
like everything, and so Iunderstand it.
And it took me and, just likeyou said, it doesn't require you
to leave the country andeverything else.
It just took me that it tookthat for me to leave, to
separate myself, in order torealize, like, how much damage I
(37:55):
was doing to myself.
You know, because if I wasn'tworking hard, just like you said
, yeah, I didn't earn my sleep.
You know, if I didn't work outhard enough, I didn't earn my
meals.
And I eat whenever the fuck Iwant now and it's, you know, I
don't feel bad about it, youknow I I actually I eat more and
I actually have lost weightbeing there, not just because of
(38:18):
the food, but, you know, thepreservatives and it's so much
healthier and everything's fresh.
That's the crazy part too.
Fast food restaurants they don'tfucking make it like.
You don't see McDonald's andBurger King.
You might have it like here andthere, but you don't see them
like that often, because ittakes so much less time and it's
so much more fresh for them tohave fresh baked bread, you know
(38:38):
, and they scramble the eggright there.
Even at the they have circle Ksthat they literally will
scramble eggs for you rightthere and put it in the sandwich
and everything else and makeyou like a breakfast sandwich,
and that's the thing is thatit's they shut down because it's
more expensive, and that's thething is that they shut down
because it's more expensive.
It doesn't taste as good butyou have that in the States as
well just not what you're usedto.
(39:00):
When you get accustomed tocertain patterns and when you
have your life, you get set inthat same mode and it becomes
repetitive.
But you become accustomed to itand so breaking away from that
takes time, you know, but it'sso much worth it if you take
that time to actually do it.
Stretching before I go to bedgot into yoga and that literally
(39:24):
helped me sleep, you know, butI never would have thought of
that like I needed that before.
It was just kind of things if Iget a chance to, now I
absolutely like need to, youknow, in order to get like
really good sleep, I need to dothat and it doesn't become like
something I have to do.
It's something I get to dobecause we all we're getting
into that point now where, youknow, I know that there's going
(39:46):
to be a day coming where I can't, can't lift anymore.
You know what I mean.
I don't know when it's going tohappen and I'm making sure I I
can do that as long as I can,but right now I, my mentality,
has changed.
It's very simple I get to dothis, versus before I have to do
this.
You know what I mean.
And that made a monumentalchange in my life.
(40:09):
It truly did just changing thatmentality in my head.
Going and I have to get to thegym.
No, I get to go to the gym, Iget to go do this.
I get to go on.
I get to go swim, I get to gofucking hiking, I get to do all
these things.
I get to do that.
I don't have to do any of it,but I get to and I want to.
Speaker 1 (40:47):
It's fucking wise.
That's.
That's the reality.
If we stop looking ateverything in our day-to-day
life as a burden, as a task,that's a big shift.
A lot of us have that.
Many of you are programmingtime to hold your kids and the
alarm goes off and you're fuck,I got to go Life's short.
Nothing's guaranteed.
You don't know what's going tohappen tomorrow.
When you get in your car, godforbid you're not met with some
catastrophe that takes somethingaway from you that you can't do
(41:08):
Like.
Walk, focus on the good in yourlife and understand that it
might seem like a pain in theass, but the real pain in the
ass is you sitting therethinking that tomorrow's
guaranteed, like that's.
That's the ultimate greatestmind.
Fuck is if you continue tobelieve that, because nothing's
guaranteed, you gotta be able tolook at the blessings you got
(41:29):
today.
That's why gratitude's soimportant, man.
I'm sure you understand thatmore than anybody, right?
Speaker 2 (41:34):
now.
There was an article I readabout a CEO a few years ago, but
one of the most things thatmade an impact on me was and he
was a multi-billionaire and hewas like the one thing I say
there's never been a point intime that I've been ill and he
knew he was about to pass.
He had a short time left that Ithought about I should have had
(42:00):
.
You know, I wish I would havehad more overtime or wish I
would have worked more.
You know what I mean and justthat I was like holy shit, you
know, and you know sometimes itcould be just that one passage
in a paragraph that hits youhard.
And, man, one of the thingsthat I learned more than
anything is like to my friendsand I'll tell them, I love them
to make it to the point whereit's uncomfortable.
(42:20):
I was like I love you, brother.
You know what I mean and I gotno problem saying that because
you know, the last thing I wantto do is this will be the last
time I talk to them and I nevertold them and that to me would.
I would carry that for the restof my life.
You know what I mean.
Rather than I got no problemtelling people that you know I
care about them.
I'll do anything for them, my,my family, my friends.
(42:43):
That, to me is, is the priority,you know.
And in order for me to takecare of them the best I can, I
have to be, you know, healthy.
I have to be, you know, in astrong mental capacity.
That needs to be if they needsupport, you know, and they do
the same thing.
So those have become mypriorities now and again.
(43:05):
I don't have the big fancy car.
I got a little moped and I lovemy Vespa.
That's really all I need.
You know what I mean, becauseI'm so happy.
I literally wake up with asmile on my face and I'm just
like I fucking love this, I lovethis, and so I'm going to keep
doing that for as long as I can.
Speaker 1 (43:25):
You know the status symbols don't mean much if you
live a life devoid of being ofservice and helping other people
.
It's all about going into thisnext chapter of your life as
listening service membersanybody out there honestly Make
sure your life is built more onthe things that you're doing for
others, the kindness, thegenerosity, the great things
(43:47):
you're experiencing with yourfamily and friends.
Make that the lavish thing inyour life.
Like, look, I get it.
It'd be nice to have thatfrigging awesome, flashy car,
but what good is it if it's byyourself?
Focus on the good you can bringfor other people.
(44:08):
Be a mentor, be of service toothers.
Be good to people around you.
Trust me, that has more impacton the world around you and it
will be far more rewarding lateron in life than grinding away
in work culture trying to getthat fancy-ass car.
It looks cool.
I can't tell you that itdoesn't look cool, but I will
tell you that you will be morehappy if you surround yourself
with good people.
(44:28):
Focus on your family and focuson what you can do for somebody
else.
Alan, I can't thank you forjoining me today, man.
It's been awesome diving inyour story.
What's next for you?
What's the next adventure, man?
Speaker 2 (44:39):
actually you got just more countries I haven't been
to.
So there's a festival in BhutanI'm going to.
There's a like a horse trekking, I'm trying to get someone
Mongolian wrestling.
And when I go to Mongolia, justI've literally been kind of
digging into some of thefestivals.
There's one in Japan, there'sanother one in Indonesia.
(44:59):
Still got to go to thePhilippines and work my way from
there.
I still haven't been to Africa,anywhere in Africa.
So I definitely want to gothere.
Speaker 1 (45:11):
I've got a guy I link up with, you can link up with.
I can help you, provide you ona proper wildlife safari.
Shout out to my boy, kevin Pip,former SF guy doing great
things in South Africa.
I'll plug him out there.
If you're looking for a guidedtour of the bush wild works, has
got you.
I'll get you guys connected.
Uh, cause he's fucking awesome.
(45:32):
And yeah, I'd like to see twoGreen Berets link up and down
under Africa and do some funstuff.
Yeah, man, you're, you'reliving testament what we got to
be willing to do.
Man, break away from the matrixand go explore, maybe not
forever, maybe not breakcompletely off.
I know I'm proud American, Ilike living here and I'm
grounded here.
I have a little one I like toraise here.
(45:52):
But if you're adventurous andyou're ready to go, do something
big, go travel, follow Alan'sfootprints.
Alan, if people want to followyou, where can they go?
Speaker 2 (46:02):
I'm on Instagram, on Facebook, just Alan Shibarro or
AlanShibarro.
I think Facebook is easier tofind too.
Speaker 1 (46:09):
Heck, yeah, go ahead and pause.
Go to episode, episodedescription.
Those links will be there.
As long as for uh links or howyou can support the show, I'll
leave us a comment or two.
Give us a positive review.
I'd really appreciate it.
Go to spotify, apple podcastand youtube subscribe.
You know the whole spiel.
I'm dan caballero.
Thank you for tuning in, alan.
Thanks again.
We'll see y'all next time,appreciate it.
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