May 8, 2024 • 34 mins
Embarking on a journey of triumph over adversity, Terry Yoffe joins us to share her incredible narrative that weaves through the fabric of ambition, resilience, and the relentless pursuit of one's passions. Engage with us as Terry, a distinguished executive career, business, and communications coach, recounts her serendipitous beginnings at Women's Wear Daily and the strategic climbs through the ranks of The New Yorker and Bon Appetit. Her reflections on the power of reputation and the critical nature of embracing opportunities are reminders of how each decision can be a stepping stone toward an exceptional career and, ultimately, the discovery of one's true vocation in life.
As Terry peels back the layers of her professional evolution, she imparts wisdom on the dynamic landscape of leadership and the art of communication, stressing adaptability in a world where empathy has become a cornerstone of influence. Listen with us and learn how coaching is pivotal in breaking down personal barriers, refining skills, and fostering environments where collaboration flourishes. Terry's insights into the common challenges we face, from advocating for ourselves to confronting the fear of failure, resonate with the understanding that growth is a conquest over internal battles as much as it is about seizing external opportunities. Join Terry and me, Juli Baranik, for an episode that promises to illuminate the path to personal and professional greatness.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back.
This is Julie Baranek, host ofthe 7 Figure Builder Show, and
I'm here today with my friendTerry Yaffe.
Hey, Terry.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi Julie, how are you today?
Speaker 1 (00:09):
I'm so excited to talk with you today.
Thank you, same here.
I'm very got an award recentlyand also the fabulous host of
the Extraordinary Work podcastin the top 2%.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
we were just chatting about, which is absolutely
right.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
So tell us a bit, like tell us a little bit about
what you do and how you got towhere you are.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Oh, gosh, it's very circuitous.
I'm going to keep it as shortas I can because nobody wants a
circuitous long road experience.
As of today, I am a executivecareer business and
communications coach, which I amtwice certified, and have been
(01:01):
a coach for 20 years, which is ahuge accomplishment because I
didn't start when I was 12.
I really started later in lifeto getting to where I am and I
have built my business again,not knowing.
So just a little backtrack goall the way back.
(01:24):
But I was in sales for a verylong time.
It started and this is part ofmy message is, if a platform
comes up, say yes, say yes, I'mgoing to do it.
And that seems to be mytrajectory, even though I never
(01:47):
thought I was not that way as ayoungster.
And what happened was I wasasked to join Women's Wear Daily
, which I had no salesexperience, none.
But she said you know thefashion industry?
Okay, I took it.
(02:07):
I could have said, no, I'mfearful.
What if I make a mistake?
What if I fall?
I didn't, I just said whetherit was stupidity or just going
for it.
I said sure, and I took a$600,000 territory to a million
three, wow, in three years.
And from there I got recruitedto Conte Nast and I was at the
(02:33):
New Yorker and I was in fashionand you couldn't sell fashion to
that magazine years ago andthey moved me to travel and I
was at the magazine I don't knowa number of years and I took at
the New Yorker, I took thatcategory to the number one slot,
(02:53):
which had never happened, wow.
And then I went on to BonAppetit for two years, which I'm
not sure was the right choicefor me.
I don't cook, I'm not a bigeater, so, and at that point but
you know, I believe theuniverse really moves us in
direction we need to go.
A lot of people probably don't.
(03:15):
From past experiences, I do feelyes, and it was time.
I mean my husband had beentelling me start your own rep
company, start your own repcompany.
However, we're all attached tothe golden handcuffs and I
didn't want to leave.
I was making a lot of moneyuntil one day I took a hard look
(03:37):
and said you know what?
It's time for me to build myown sandbox where I could be in
charge.
And I left.
I got, as I say metaphorically,I got into a rowboat and I
started leaving the shore.
I was in, I kept looking backand you know, am I doing the
(03:58):
right thing?
Am I doing the right?
And I just kept going and, asscary as it was, and I just kept
going, and as scary as it was,I started my second entrepreneur
.
I had a short stint as anentrepreneur years ago and I was
(04:19):
fortunate because I had areally good reputation, and
that's another tip.
In business, reputation iseverything.
If you don't have a goodreputation, you will not get to
where you might want to go to.
And I had an incrediblereputation in the field of media
(04:40):
and people hired me, had agreat business, very successful,
and then that dried up and nowwe come to the third stage,
where what do I do?
Have no idea.
I spent many years in analysisand different modalities.
(05:01):
I said, oh, I'll go back toschool and become a therapist.
That did not work out.
So I started looking at wherecan I go, what can I do?
And again I landed on coaching,knew nothing about it.
I went from being top of thegame to being in the basement,
as I say, because I had noknowledge how to go back to
(05:22):
school.
I had to take a course incoaching, which was a
certificate and then I went onto get the certification and I
joined the ICE InternationalCoach Federation New York City
chapter.
I went from secretary topresident and ran that chapter
(05:44):
and I was also part of anorganization that has changed
its name since and I helpedco-found and became chair of
their mentoring program and itbecame the gold standard for
mentoring.
It was really looked at andpeople acknowledged it and me
(06:04):
and the people that worked withme.
We did an incredible job andeven though I'm gone, it's still
highly successful.
So that's my short trajectoryand of a short snippet of my
life.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
I love that.
Thank you for sharing that withus, and I think what you
mentioned early on about havingthe mindset of saying yes to
opportunity and being open towhere the road is going to take
you is extremely powerful.
I know I've experienced thesame thing in my own world and I
remember early in my owncorporate career I had the
(06:40):
opportunity to I was asked togive a presentation to a whole
big conference for IBM and I wasbusy at the time and looking
back, I'm like I should havetaken it right, like whatever it
meant it didn't really matter,but just those opportunities.
Like you know, it shifted myown personal mentality at that
point of like, when thoseopportunities arise, whatever
(07:02):
they are, take them right, likejust take that jump and that
leap of faith to really seewhere that can take you in your
career right.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
I encourage my clients to do that all the time,
and I don't know where thiscame from.
I didn't grow up in a householdof you know.
My mother had different jobs,but she was always in the same
field.
My father worked.
Nobody went out on their own.
(07:33):
Well, my father had his ownbusiness, but nobody jumped at
being an entrepreneur, so tospeak, or do any of what I've
done.
I somehow stopped playing itsafe and I don't know when that
happened.
I guess it was always in me,because at a very young age I
(07:56):
was engaged and I was gettingmarried and he broke it off.
I was devastated, devastated,and I don't know.
Within a month and a half, Itook my money.
I was off to Europe for thesummer, I don't know.
You know, as I went along and Igot fired numerous, numerous
(08:19):
times, and I knew I had to getback up and I did whatever it
took to make money.
I did some real estate, I didsome HR work, I did some market.
Whatever door opened, I wentinto it, I didn't care.
So I think there are lessons inthrowing caution to the wind,
(08:44):
so to speak.
Now, if somebody says, jump offa bridge, I wouldn't say
exactly sure, but you know, younever know where the path is
going to lead.
If I didn't do any of thethings I said yes to the
trajectory of my life would notbe here sitting and talking to
(09:07):
you.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Absolutely.
The other thing I hear is it'snot always rosy, right, like
there are many points where itcan be humbling, it can be, you
know, knock you on your tail andyou have to make those
decisions to move forward, right, to move forward right.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Of course, my passion is creating change, and that's
never easy, and I have changednumerous, numerous times who I
am within myself, by working onmyself and my careers.
When I looked at a crystal ballyears ago, would anyone have
told me I'd been a successfulsalesperson?
(09:46):
I would have started a coachingpractice and, two and a quarter
years ago, start a podcast.
It's like every time I startsomething new, my husband's eyes
roll and I was like, oh gosh,now what you know.
But there's something to besaid for doing it.
(10:06):
It's, it's not easy.
It's getting comfortable, beinguncomfortable, yeah, but that's
the world we live in today.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Absolutely Well, I'm with that, I'm sorry, go ahead.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
No, no, no, go ahead.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I was going to say with that there's constant
change, right Like, how have youseen that in your career and
how do you help your clientswith that?
Also?
Speaker 2 (10:36):
I did a blog called Dancing on Shifting Sands and it
was never more fruitful thantoday, because there's no solid
ground anywhere.
You have to have the growthmindset versus the fixed mindset
(10:57):
, no matter where you are inyour career, no matter how much
money you're making, you've gotto be able to open that lens and
see that everything is changing, as you said, moment to moment.
And dancing on shifting sandsis being able to do that dance,
(11:20):
not on solid ground.
And, if anything, what I workwith my clients on, first of all
, they'll all tell you rightaway.
I they'll say she tells you,stop with the stories.
They know me because you knowpeople go into their stories as
to why their life isn't workingwell, this well, that well, that
(11:42):
well, that, and they get stuckin their stories and the stories
don't create change.
They've got to give up thestories and look at what's
really underneath.
And, having spent so many yearsin analysis and different
modalities, I really helpclients turn their eyes inward
(12:02):
and to really look at what'sgoing on.
Where's the fear?
Because that's what's there.
Yeah, I don't care how manystories, I don't care.
Well, you know, it's this well,it's that, well, you know,
doesn't help.
I really make them.
(12:23):
As one said, she holds a mirrorup so you can't move away from
it.
Yeah, really got to look at,and that's that's what I
basically do with my clients,because I feel I have walked in
each of their shoes.
I've been fired, I've been this, I've been that, I've been this
, and it's about being willingto get up no matter what and, as
(12:46):
Brene Brown says, being awarrior and getting back into
the arena every single day, andI can't stress that enough for
all of us, all of us Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
And it doesn't matter where you are in your career.
I mean you work with verysuccessful C-suite executives.
I mean we all have that, thoseinner frustrations, the
occasional victim mentality, thefear like we're all overcoming
that.
But you know what?
Have you seen that the biggestthing that people need to
overcome to be able to get tothat next level of growth?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
they.
So really what holds peopleback is their trauma, their
wounds and, as somebody on apodcast of mine said, the not
good enough pandemic that is ineverybody and that is where it
(13:48):
all is and it's being willing tooppose the saboteur, if you
will.
To look at that and say thoseare limiting beliefs.
They're really not who I am Iam.
(14:17):
They're only things that I puttogether in my mind a long time
ago and that's what runs people.
You know maybe it sounds alittle too therapy-ish, but you
know it's hard not to navigatethat part of life so you can
become successful, so you canbecome the best version of
yourself.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Absolutely yeah, and that's so many times we don't
know what we're up against.
I mean, like you'd say, itsounds so therapy, but it
impacts all of the aspects ofour lives, both personally,
professionally, especiallyprofessionally, because it's the
inner personal relationshipsthat you have with people, no
matter where you are in thecorporate world or entrepreneur
(14:57):
or whatever you're working withright.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Yeah, I mean to that extent.
I had a client, a woman, thatwas on the carpet not for her
work.
She did excellent work, it washow she interacted with her
staff and her team and it wasn'tgoing well and she couldn't
figure out what was going on.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Absolutely.
So, yeah, no, go ahead, finishyour thought.
No, I'm done.
Well, I was going to say withthat.
You know the role ofcommunication.
What do you see that thatimpacts you know, either
positively or negatively peoplein that role.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
One of my favorite subjects because I do work with
people on their communicationskills and most people do not
know the power of communication.
It is the number one skill thatis most needed today and I
(15:57):
think people think aboutcommunication as opening their
mouth and regurgitating, if youwill.
Whatever comes out, they don'tstop they.
They don't think if you can'tget your ideas across or you
(16:19):
know, influence is a very bigpart of the business world being
able to influence people.
You can't do that if yourcommunication skills don't match
how you communicate.
I do work with people on that alot.
I had a client that was sonegative, so negative she didn't
(16:44):
even know it.
I said to her do you know thatyou're negative?
She said, huh what?
No clue whatsoever.
It was like a ton of bricksfell off her no idea, wow.
So communication is right upthere in the front.
(17:08):
You have to be able tocommunicate.
As a leader, you have to beable to communicate and
communicate in a way that'saccepted.
Today's world of leadership haschanged drastically.
Oh yeah, you know, employeesdon't want the old line
(17:29):
leadership.
You know, listen to me, I'mline leadership.
You know, listen to me, I'mtelling you what to do, which it
was you?
Just good, little chattel andgo do your thing.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, and I would venture to say that your
background in sales likely hashelped you tremendously just to
be able to help people withcommunication right, because
that's what we do all day longin our interpersonal
relationships.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Mail helped me a lot develop my own communication,
but I had spent a lot of myyears on the stage in the
fashion world.
I did fashion shows and otherthings.
I was up there doingpresentations, so I really had
to hone in on my communicationskills and I think also it's
(18:18):
imperative and today leadersneed to understand that
employees want a different typeof culture.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, and how do you suggest people navigate that?
Because there's whole newgenerations coming up that have
different expectations in theworkplace than what we may have
had or other generations havehad ahead of us.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
I think today's generation is almost forcing the
issue for leaders to take ahard look at.
How are they leading?
Do they have a open, caringculture?
Or is it toxic, because today'syounger generation don't want
(19:11):
to be in that kind ofenvironment?
Years ago, when people stayedin a job, they swallowed hard
and stayed.
It's not that way.
And um, being a servant leaderand caring and being open and
honest and kind and listening iswhat is wanted and needed,
(19:34):
bringing teams together thatfoster this type of environment.
Teams that work togetherproduce much more work than
those that are splintered andwere forced to compete against
each other.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And how do those things tie inwith a leader's vision, like if
they're struggling with gettingalignment, what would you
recommend for someone?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Get a coach.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Reach out to you.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
call you a coach, reach out to you, call you
Really.
It's.
What I have found is it's veryhard to do this alone.
I have had leaders that havetried, but unless they are shown
what some of their issues are,they don't know.
And you know, work with someone.
(20:30):
Maybe it's somebody in HR,maybe it's definitely a coach
who can help them get throughthis so they become the success
they want to be in the bestversion of themselves, and yet
they don't know what's holdingthem back.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Absolutely Well, and that it also gives them a safe
space to really explore this,because when you're a leader in
your organization, you have tolead, like you know, and it's
hard to be vulnerable in thatrole, but you need somebody that
can help reflect that back andhelp you figure out, okay, what
is not working.
What do I need differently?
You know and it's, I would say,not a sign of weakness but,
(21:09):
frankly, a sign of strength tobe able to connect with somebody
like you and one thing leadersdidn't want to do and maybe
they're doing it more it'sbecome vulnerable, because
people still look at that as aweakness.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Being vulnerable is strength actually, and leaders
that can be vulnerable intoday's world, then their
employees see a model that theycan go in and talk to them and
share their thoughts.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Yeah, yeah, and it comes back to we're talking
offline but just building thatrelationship with people, both
as a leader of your organizationand your team.
And just you know you want tobe a leader but you need to be
approachable so that people canrespect you but still you know,
be able to understand what yourexpectations are.
All of that, right, right, likeit all ties together.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Same with a coach.
You know you're not going toget a client if you're tight, if
you're, you know if they get anenergy of I'm not approachable.
You know, with a client, acoach has to create a safe space
for a client to come in and bewilling to open up and share
(22:33):
their most intimate issues andsecrets that have stood in the
way of their getting to wherethey need to go.
That is, for me, the mostimportant part of coaching is
being able to create a safespace and have a client know I'm
(22:53):
trustworthy, I have integrityand I am there for them 100%.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah, which again it comes to me that all the
different roles that youmentioned of your background tie
into exactly what you're doingtoday, both with the therapy,
the sales, the everything you'vedone.
This is like a perfectculmination of all of those
together here.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
I am.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
Right, you just didn't know that it was the
perfect spot for you, right.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Who knew I was being, you know, trained and and
shaped for where I am today,because creating change is my
passion, truly, and I do it inevery arena I can.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I love that.
And what are the biggest gapsthat you see with your clients?
Like things that they don't.
Yeah, I mean we mentioned likethe mental hurdles and things
like that, but what else do yousee with them?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
a lot, don't you?
We're going back to the thread.
They can't advocate forthemselves, they're too fearful
to speak up, and it's absolutelyimperative that they do that.
But they don't know how to doit and that does not put them in
a great position.
(24:08):
Number one, number two clientsthat want to get to the next
level in there rungs up theladder, if you will, if that's
where they want to go, andwhat's stopping them Probably
(24:28):
the biggest is is I'm not goodenough.
What if I fail?
What if I don't make it?
What if they say no to me?
And then I say what if they sayyes?
So that's another big hurdlefor people communication.
How do you get your messageacross?
How do you feel you've got aseat at the table If it's all
(24:56):
men or predominantly men?
How do you move through whereyou are?
Do you change careers?
How do I leave my job and startan entrepreneurship?
What does it take?
(25:17):
And many others, absolutely.
Those are just a few, and itdoesn't matter the level you're
at.
It doesn't matter if you'remaking six figures, seven
figures or five figures.
It's the same for everyone.
These issues come up, thesechallenges.
(25:41):
I never use the word weaknessTo me.
That's a word I will never usebecause to me it's broken.
So challenges, and how do youmeet them?
Speaker 1 (25:54):
yeah, yeah, well, not the root.
We're all human, like we all,exactly we all have the same
struggles.
They just present differentways.
Yes, absolutely yeah.
So I'm curious.
You work with a ton of verysuccessful people.
You've accomplished a tonyourself in all of your careers,
but how do you define success?
What does that look like to you?
Oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I have several levels of success.
My first one is peace of mind.
I did not have that for many,many years, many, many years.
To me, that is the mostvaluable asset that I can go to
sleep at night, that I can walkaround feeling a peace of mind,
(26:42):
and I think after that it's.
For me, success is helpingpeople create change.
That's very, very important.
As you know, with my podcast asa coach, I have a TV show.
Anything getting on a podcast.
(27:03):
Creating change is the bestgift you can give yourself is
the best gift you can giveyourself.
And what does it look like?
Small, we're ordinary peopledoing extraordinary deeds.
That's what it is.
So the long and the short of itis helping people create change
(27:27):
and then having them go on tomake an impact.
Small way, big way, whatever.
None of us are celebrities thatcan wave a magic wand and puff.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
Yes, but I would venture to say you have way more
massive impact than youprobably think, based off of the
people that you connect withand then all of the people in
their world that they are thenimpacting from there.
So the change that you'recreating has massive waves, in a
way, beyond yourself, which isreally cool.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
It's that's my legacy yeah, really 100.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
I'm curious if you had the attention of the whole
world for five minutes, whatwould you tell them?
It's a big question.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
No, you know what?
The one thing I haven't done isa TED Talk.
There you go.
That's next right, I have tosay.
It would be how do we createchange in a very chaotic world
(28:40):
space?
How do we influence, or beinfluencers in making an impact
(29:02):
in life, and it can be tiny, itcan be smiling at someone as
they cross the street.
You've made an impact.
That would be what I would talkabout for about five minutes,
and you know my podcast just gotto 2% globally of all podcasts
(29:28):
and it's being able to interviewpeople that have made an impact
and being with you.
I am so truly honored to behere, julie.
It means so much to me just toshare with you who I am, what I
(29:49):
am, and no matter who you are,you can move forward.
There's no restriction.
If you're born with a silverspoon in your mouth I certainly
wasn't.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
My upbringing created havoc and lack of peace of mind
absolutely no, and that's it'sso true that you know it doesn't
matter where we came from,necessarily, and the struggles
that we have behind us, and youknow how far our vision looks to
(30:23):
be ahead of us.
Those, those small incrementalpieces of change that we can
make every day will bring us inthat direction.
Like you can have such animpact in people's lives without
even realizing it.
So I agree a hundred percent.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
That's the goal, that's the mission.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
I love that and for people that are loving what
they're hearing and thinkingokay, I need her help.
How can they find you?
Where can they find you?
Where can they find the podcast?
Tell us about it.
Oh, okay, my website istrycoachingcom.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
They find you?
Where can they find you?
Where can they find the podcasttell us about?
Oh, okay, uh, my website istrycoachingcom and it is the
home page is under redo, but youcan learn everything you want
about me, my philosophy andcertainly my testimonials, to
see what people actually, overthe over 20 years, have said
(31:11):
about me and what they've gottenout of it.
My podcast is right there on mywebsite.
Or, alternatively, you can goto Apple Podcasts and put in
extraordinary work conversationsabout creating change, or you
can email me atterriattrycoachingcom.
I would really love to havejust a conversation and see if
(31:35):
this might be something that wecan partner on.
Whatever it is.
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Absolutely, and we'll have all the links below so
people can come check you outand come see all the amazing
work that you're doing.
Yeah, absolutely.
Thank you, Terry, for being ontoday.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
Thank you, Julie.
As I said, it's a true honor todo this with you.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
And me as well.
I know often with as being apodcast host yourself.
Of course, you tend to give toeveryone else and don't often
have that opportunity tonecessarily share what's on your
mind, so I'm happy to take thattoday.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah, and if you found value in this episode,
please do share it.
That's how people find us, andyou can find me at
sevenfigurebuildercom and I willsee you on the next episode.
Welcome back.
This is Julie Baranek, host ofthe 7 Figure Builder Show, and
I'm here today with my friendTerry Yaffe.
Hey, Terry.
Speaker 2 (00:07):
Hi Julie, how are you today?
Speaker 1 (00:09):
I'm so excited to talk with you today.
Thank you, same here.
I'm very got an award recentlyand also the fabulous host of
the Extraordinary Work podcastin the top 2%.
Speaker 2 (00:29):
we were just chatting about, which is absolutely
right.
Speaker 1 (00:33):
So tell us a bit, like tell us a little bit about
what you do and how you got towhere you are.
Speaker 2 (00:37):
Oh, gosh, it's very circuitous.
I'm going to keep it as shortas I can because nobody wants a
circuitous long road experience.
As of today, I am a executivecareer business and
communications coach, which I amtwice certified, and have been
(01:01):
a coach for 20 years, which is ahuge accomplishment because I
didn't start when I was 12.
I really started later in lifeto getting to where I am and I
have built my business again,not knowing.
So just a little backtrack goall the way back.
(01:24):
But I was in sales for a verylong time.
It started and this is part ofmy message is, if a platform
comes up, say yes, say yes, I'mgoing to do it.
And that seems to be mytrajectory, even though I never
(01:47):
thought I was not that way as ayoungster.
And what happened was I wasasked to join Women's Wear Daily
, which I had no salesexperience, none.
But she said you know thefashion industry?
Okay, I took it.
(02:07):
I could have said, no, I'mfearful.
What if I make a mistake?
What if I fall?
I didn't, I just said whetherit was stupidity or just going
for it.
I said sure, and I took a$600,000 territory to a million
three, wow, in three years.
And from there I got recruitedto Conte Nast and I was at the
(02:33):
New Yorker and I was in fashionand you couldn't sell fashion to
that magazine years ago andthey moved me to travel and I
was at the magazine I don't knowa number of years and I took at
the New Yorker, I took thatcategory to the number one slot,
(02:53):
which had never happened, wow.
And then I went on to BonAppetit for two years, which I'm
not sure was the right choicefor me.
I don't cook, I'm not a bigeater, so, and at that point but
you know, I believe theuniverse really moves us in
direction we need to go.
A lot of people probably don't.
(03:15):
From past experiences, I do feelyes, and it was time.
I mean my husband had beentelling me start your own rep
company, start your own repcompany.
However, we're all attached tothe golden handcuffs and I
didn't want to leave.
I was making a lot of moneyuntil one day I took a hard look
(03:37):
and said you know what?
It's time for me to build myown sandbox where I could be in
charge.
And I left.
I got, as I say metaphorically,I got into a rowboat and I
started leaving the shore.
I was in, I kept looking backand you know, am I doing the
(03:58):
right thing?
Am I doing the right?
And I just kept going and, asscary as it was, and I just kept
going, and as scary as it was,I started my second entrepreneur
.
I had a short stint as anentrepreneur years ago and I was
(04:19):
fortunate because I had areally good reputation, and
that's another tip.
In business, reputation iseverything.
If you don't have a goodreputation, you will not get to
where you might want to go to.
And I had an incrediblereputation in the field of media
(04:40):
and people hired me, had agreat business, very successful,
and then that dried up and nowwe come to the third stage,
where what do I do?
Have no idea.
I spent many years in analysisand different modalities.
(05:01):
I said, oh, I'll go back toschool and become a therapist.
That did not work out.
So I started looking at wherecan I go, what can I do?
And again I landed on coaching,knew nothing about it.
I went from being top of thegame to being in the basement,
as I say, because I had noknowledge how to go back to
(05:22):
school.
I had to take a course incoaching, which was a
certificate and then I went onto get the certification and I
joined the ICE InternationalCoach Federation New York City
chapter.
I went from secretary topresident and ran that chapter
(05:44):
and I was also part of anorganization that has changed
its name since and I helpedco-found and became chair of
their mentoring program and itbecame the gold standard for
mentoring.
It was really looked at andpeople acknowledged it and me
(06:04):
and the people that worked withme.
We did an incredible job andeven though I'm gone, it's still
highly successful.
So that's my short trajectoryand of a short snippet of my
life.
Speaker 1 (06:19):
I love that.
Thank you for sharing that withus, and I think what you
mentioned early on about havingthe mindset of saying yes to
opportunity and being open towhere the road is going to take
you is extremely powerful.
I know I've experienced thesame thing in my own world and I
remember early in my owncorporate career I had the
(06:40):
opportunity to I was asked togive a presentation to a whole
big conference for IBM and I wasbusy at the time and looking
back, I'm like I should havetaken it right, like whatever it
meant it didn't really matter,but just those opportunities.
Like you know, it shifted myown personal mentality at that
point of like, when thoseopportunities arise, whatever
(07:02):
they are, take them right, likejust take that jump and that
leap of faith to really seewhere that can take you in your
career right.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
I encourage my clients to do that all the time,
and I don't know where thiscame from.
I didn't grow up in a householdof you know.
My mother had different jobs,but she was always in the same
field.
My father worked.
Nobody went out on their own.
(07:33):
Well, my father had his ownbusiness, but nobody jumped at
being an entrepreneur, so tospeak, or do any of what I've
done.
I somehow stopped playing itsafe and I don't know when that
happened.
I guess it was always in me,because at a very young age I
(07:56):
was engaged and I was gettingmarried and he broke it off.
I was devastated, devastated,and I don't know.
Within a month and a half, Itook my money.
I was off to Europe for thesummer, I don't know.
You know, as I went along and Igot fired numerous, numerous
(08:19):
times, and I knew I had to getback up and I did whatever it
took to make money.
I did some real estate, I didsome HR work, I did some market.
Whatever door opened, I wentinto it, I didn't care.
So I think there are lessons inthrowing caution to the wind,
(08:44):
so to speak.
Now, if somebody says, jump offa bridge, I wouldn't say
exactly sure, but you know, younever know where the path is
going to lead.
If I didn't do any of thethings I said yes to the
trajectory of my life would notbe here sitting and talking to
(09:07):
you.
Speaker 1 (09:08):
Absolutely.
The other thing I hear is it'snot always rosy, right, like
there are many points where itcan be humbling, it can be, you
know, knock you on your tail andyou have to make those
decisions to move forward, right, to move forward right.
Speaker 2 (09:25):
Of course, my passion is creating change, and that's
never easy, and I have changednumerous, numerous times who I
am within myself, by working onmyself and my careers.
When I looked at a crystal ballyears ago, would anyone have
told me I'd been a successfulsalesperson?
(09:46):
I would have started a coachingpractice and, two and a quarter
years ago, start a podcast.
It's like every time I startsomething new, my husband's eyes
roll and I was like, oh gosh,now what you know.
But there's something to besaid for doing it.
(10:06):
It's, it's not easy.
It's getting comfortable, beinguncomfortable, yeah, but that's
the world we live in today.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Absolutely Well, I'm with that, I'm sorry, go ahead.
Speaker 2 (10:26):
No, no, no, go ahead.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
I was going to say with that there's constant
change, right Like, how have youseen that in your career and
how do you help your clientswith that?
Also?
Speaker 2 (10:36):
I did a blog called Dancing on Shifting Sands and it
was never more fruitful thantoday, because there's no solid
ground anywhere.
You have to have the growthmindset versus the fixed mindset
(10:57):
, no matter where you are inyour career, no matter how much
money you're making, you've gotto be able to open that lens and
see that everything is changing, as you said, moment to moment.
And dancing on shifting sandsis being able to do that dance,
(11:20):
not on solid ground.
And, if anything, what I workwith my clients on, first of all
, they'll all tell you rightaway.
I they'll say she tells you,stop with the stories.
They know me because you knowpeople go into their stories as
to why their life isn't workingwell, this well, that well, that
(11:42):
well, that, and they get stuckin their stories and the stories
don't create change.
They've got to give up thestories and look at what's
really underneath.
And, having spent so many yearsin analysis and different
modalities, I really helpclients turn their eyes inward
(12:02):
and to really look at what'sgoing on.
Where's the fear?
Because that's what's there.
Yeah, I don't care how manystories, I don't care.
Well, you know, it's this well,it's that, well, you know,
doesn't help.
I really make them.
(12:23):
As one said, she holds a mirrorup so you can't move away from
it.
Yeah, really got to look at,and that's that's what I
basically do with my clients,because I feel I have walked in
each of their shoes.
I've been fired, I've been this, I've been that, I've been this
, and it's about being willingto get up no matter what and, as
(12:46):
Brene Brown says, being awarrior and getting back into
the arena every single day, andI can't stress that enough for
all of us, all of us Absolutely.
Speaker 1 (13:01):
And it doesn't matter where you are in your career.
I mean you work with verysuccessful C-suite executives.
I mean we all have that, thoseinner frustrations, the
occasional victim mentality, thefear like we're all overcoming
that.
But you know what?
Have you seen that the biggestthing that people need to
overcome to be able to get tothat next level of growth?
Speaker 2 (13:27):
they.
So really what holds peopleback is their trauma, their
wounds and, as somebody on apodcast of mine said, the not
good enough pandemic that is ineverybody and that is where it
(13:48):
all is and it's being willing tooppose the saboteur, if you
will.
To look at that and say thoseare limiting beliefs.
They're really not who I am Iam.
(14:17):
They're only things that I puttogether in my mind a long time
ago and that's what runs people.
You know maybe it sounds alittle too therapy-ish, but you
know it's hard not to navigatethat part of life so you can
become successful, so you canbecome the best version of
yourself.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
Absolutely yeah, and that's so many times we don't
know what we're up against.
I mean, like you'd say, itsounds so therapy, but it
impacts all of the aspects ofour lives, both personally,
professionally, especiallyprofessionally, because it's the
inner personal relationshipsthat you have with people, no
matter where you are in thecorporate world or entrepreneur
(14:57):
or whatever you're working withright.
Speaker 2 (15:01):
Yeah, I mean to that extent.
I had a client, a woman, thatwas on the carpet not for her
work.
She did excellent work, it washow she interacted with her
staff and her team and it wasn'tgoing well and she couldn't
figure out what was going on.
Speaker 1 (15:19):
Absolutely.
So, yeah, no, go ahead, finishyour thought.
No, I'm done.
Well, I was going to say withthat.
You know the role ofcommunication.
What do you see that thatimpacts you know, either
positively or negatively peoplein that role.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
One of my favorite subjects because I do work with
people on their communicationskills and most people do not
know the power of communication.
It is the number one skill thatis most needed today and I
(15:57):
think people think aboutcommunication as opening their
mouth and regurgitating, if youwill.
Whatever comes out, they don'tstop they.
They don't think if you can'tget your ideas across or you
(16:19):
know, influence is a very bigpart of the business world being
able to influence people.
You can't do that if yourcommunication skills don't match
how you communicate.
I do work with people on that alot.
I had a client that was sonegative, so negative she didn't
(16:44):
even know it.
I said to her do you know thatyou're negative?
She said, huh what?
No clue whatsoever.
It was like a ton of bricksfell off her no idea, wow.
So communication is right upthere in the front.
(17:08):
You have to be able tocommunicate.
As a leader, you have to beable to communicate and
communicate in a way that'saccepted.
Today's world of leadership haschanged drastically.
Oh yeah, you know, employeesdon't want the old line
(17:29):
leadership.
You know, listen to me, I'mline leadership.
You know, listen to me, I'mtelling you what to do, which it
was you?
Just good, little chattel andgo do your thing.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
Yeah, and I would venture to say that your
background in sales likely hashelped you tremendously just to
be able to help people withcommunication right, because
that's what we do all day longin our interpersonal
relationships.
Speaker 2 (17:53):
Mail helped me a lot develop my own communication,
but I had spent a lot of myyears on the stage in the
fashion world.
I did fashion shows and otherthings.
I was up there doingpresentations, so I really had
to hone in on my communicationskills and I think also it's
(18:18):
imperative and today leadersneed to understand that
employees want a different typeof culture.
Speaker 1 (18:35):
Yeah, and how do you suggest people navigate that?
Because there's whole newgenerations coming up that have
different expectations in theworkplace than what we may have
had or other generations havehad ahead of us.
Speaker 2 (18:49):
I think today's generation is almost forcing the
issue for leaders to take ahard look at.
How are they leading?
Do they have a open, caringculture?
Or is it toxic, because today'syounger generation don't want
(19:11):
to be in that kind ofenvironment?
Years ago, when people stayedin a job, they swallowed hard
and stayed.
It's not that way.
And um, being a servant leaderand caring and being open and
honest and kind and listening iswhat is wanted and needed,
(19:34):
bringing teams together thatfoster this type of environment.
Teams that work togetherproduce much more work than
those that are splintered andwere forced to compete against
each other.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
Yeah, yeah, absolutely.
And how do those things tie inwith a leader's vision, like if
they're struggling with gettingalignment, what would you
recommend for someone?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Get a coach.
Speaker 1 (20:07):
Reach out to you.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
call you a coach, reach out to you, call you
Really.
It's.
What I have found is it's veryhard to do this alone.
I have had leaders that havetried, but unless they are shown
what some of their issues are,they don't know.
And you know, work with someone.
(20:30):
Maybe it's somebody in HR,maybe it's definitely a coach
who can help them get throughthis so they become the success
they want to be in the bestversion of themselves, and yet
they don't know what's holdingthem back.
Speaker 1 (20:47):
Absolutely Well, and that it also gives them a safe
space to really explore this,because when you're a leader in
your organization, you have tolead, like you know, and it's
hard to be vulnerable in thatrole, but you need somebody that
can help reflect that back andhelp you figure out, okay, what
is not working.
What do I need differently?
You know and it's, I would say,not a sign of weakness but,
(21:09):
frankly, a sign of strength tobe able to connect with somebody
like you and one thing leadersdidn't want to do and maybe
they're doing it more it'sbecome vulnerable, because
people still look at that as aweakness.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Being vulnerable is strength actually, and leaders
that can be vulnerable intoday's world, then their
employees see a model that theycan go in and talk to them and
share their thoughts.
Speaker 1 (21:47):
Yeah, yeah, and it comes back to we're talking
offline but just building thatrelationship with people, both
as a leader of your organizationand your team.
And just you know you want tobe a leader but you need to be
approachable so that people canrespect you but still you know,
be able to understand what yourexpectations are.
All of that, right, right, likeit all ties together.
Speaker 2 (22:08):
Same with a coach.
You know you're not going toget a client if you're tight, if
you're, you know if they get anenergy of I'm not approachable.
You know, with a client, acoach has to create a safe space
for a client to come in and bewilling to open up and share
(22:33):
their most intimate issues andsecrets that have stood in the
way of their getting to wherethey need to go.
That is, for me, the mostimportant part of coaching is
being able to create a safespace and have a client know I'm
(22:53):
trustworthy, I have integrityand I am there for them 100%.
Speaker 1 (23:00):
Yeah, which again it comes to me that all the
different roles that youmentioned of your background tie
into exactly what you're doingtoday, both with the therapy,
the sales, the everything you'vedone.
This is like a perfectculmination of all of those
together here.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
I am.
Speaker 1 (23:17):
Right, you just didn't know that it was the
perfect spot for you, right.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Who knew I was being, you know, trained and and
shaped for where I am today,because creating change is my
passion, truly, and I do it inevery arena I can.
Speaker 1 (23:37):
I love that.
And what are the biggest gapsthat you see with your clients?
Like things that they don't.
Yeah, I mean we mentioned likethe mental hurdles and things
like that, but what else do yousee with them?
Speaker 2 (23:48):
a lot, don't you?
We're going back to the thread.
They can't advocate forthemselves, they're too fearful
to speak up, and it's absolutelyimperative that they do that.
But they don't know how to doit and that does not put them in
a great position.
(24:08):
Number one, number two clientsthat want to get to the next
level in there rungs up theladder, if you will, if that's
where they want to go, andwhat's stopping them Probably
(24:28):
the biggest is is I'm not goodenough.
What if I fail?
What if I don't make it?
What if they say no to me?
And then I say what if they sayyes?
So that's another big hurdlefor people communication.
How do you get your messageacross?
How do you feel you've got aseat at the table If it's all
(24:56):
men or predominantly men?
How do you move through whereyou are?
Do you change careers?
How do I leave my job and startan entrepreneurship?
What does it take?
(25:17):
And many others, absolutely.
Those are just a few, and itdoesn't matter the level you're
at.
It doesn't matter if you'remaking six figures, seven
figures or five figures.
It's the same for everyone.
These issues come up, thesechallenges.
(25:41):
I never use the word weaknessTo me.
That's a word I will never usebecause to me it's broken.
So challenges, and how do youmeet them?
Speaker 1 (25:54):
yeah, yeah, well, not the root.
We're all human, like we all,exactly we all have the same
struggles.
They just present differentways.
Yes, absolutely yeah.
So I'm curious.
You work with a ton of verysuccessful people.
You've accomplished a tonyourself in all of your careers,
but how do you define success?
What does that look like to you?
Oh gosh.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
I have several levels of success.
My first one is peace of mind.
I did not have that for many,many years, many, many years.
To me, that is the mostvaluable asset that I can go to
sleep at night, that I can walkaround feeling a peace of mind,
(26:42):
and I think after that it's.
For me, success is helpingpeople create change.
That's very, very important.
As you know, with my podcast asa coach, I have a TV show.
Anything getting on a podcast.
(27:03):
Creating change is the bestgift you can give yourself is
the best gift you can giveyourself.
And what does it look like?
Small, we're ordinary peopledoing extraordinary deeds.
That's what it is.
So the long and the short of itis helping people create change
(27:27):
and then having them go on tomake an impact.
Small way, big way, whatever.
None of us are celebrities thatcan wave a magic wand and puff.
Speaker 1 (27:45):
Yes, but I would venture to say you have way more
massive impact than youprobably think, based off of the
people that you connect withand then all of the people in
their world that they are thenimpacting from there.
So the change that you'recreating has massive waves, in a
way, beyond yourself, which isreally cool.
Speaker 2 (28:04):
It's that's my legacy yeah, really 100.
Speaker 1 (28:10):
I'm curious if you had the attention of the whole
world for five minutes, whatwould you tell them?
It's a big question.
Speaker 2 (28:17):
No, you know what?
The one thing I haven't done isa TED Talk.
There you go.
That's next right, I have tosay.
It would be how do we createchange in a very chaotic world
(28:40):
space?
How do we influence, or beinfluencers in making an impact
(29:02):
in life, and it can be tiny, itcan be smiling at someone as
they cross the street.
You've made an impact.
That would be what I would talkabout for about five minutes,
and you know my podcast just gotto 2% globally of all podcasts
(29:28):
and it's being able to interviewpeople that have made an impact
and being with you.
I am so truly honored to behere, julie.
It means so much to me just toshare with you who I am, what I
(29:49):
am, and no matter who you are,you can move forward.
There's no restriction.
If you're born with a silverspoon in your mouth I certainly
wasn't.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
My upbringing created havoc and lack of peace of mind
absolutely no, and that's it'sso true that you know it doesn't
matter where we came from,necessarily, and the struggles
that we have behind us, and youknow how far our vision looks to
(30:23):
be ahead of us.
Those, those small incrementalpieces of change that we can
make every day will bring us inthat direction.
Like you can have such animpact in people's lives without
even realizing it.
So I agree a hundred percent.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
That's the goal, that's the mission.
Speaker 1 (30:40):
I love that and for people that are loving what
they're hearing and thinkingokay, I need her help.
How can they find you?
Where can they find you?
Where can they find the podcast?
Tell us about it.
Oh, okay, my website istrycoachingcom.
Speaker 2 (30:50):
They find you?
Where can they find you?
Where can they find the podcasttell us about?
Oh, okay, uh, my website istrycoachingcom and it is the
home page is under redo, but youcan learn everything you want
about me, my philosophy andcertainly my testimonials, to
see what people actually, overthe over 20 years, have said
(31:11):
about me and what they've gottenout of it.
My podcast is right there on mywebsite.
Or, alternatively, you can goto Apple Podcasts and put in
extraordinary work conversationsabout creating change, or you
can email me atterriattrycoachingcom.
I would really love to havejust a conversation and see if
(31:35):
this might be something that wecan partner on.
Whatever it is.
Speaker 1 (31:42):
Absolutely, and we'll have all the links below so
people can come check you outand come see all the amazing
work that you're doing.
Yeah, absolutely.
Thank you, Terry, for being ontoday.
Speaker 2 (31:53):
Thank you, Julie.
As I said, it's a true honor todo this with you.
Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (32:00):
And me as well.
I know often with as being apodcast host yourself.
Of course, you tend to give toeveryone else and don't often
have that opportunity tonecessarily share what's on your
mind, so I'm happy to take thattoday.
Speaker 2 (32:13):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah, and if you found value in this episode,
please do share it.
That's how people find us, andyou can find me at
sevenfigurebuildercom and I willsee you on the next episode.
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