Ep 100: Celebrating 10 years and 100th podcast episode

“When you witness me in my vulnerability, that’s when the real magic happens” - celebrating 100 episodes and 10 years of partnership with raw truths about love, growth, and choosing each other again and again.

In this milestone episode, Meg and Jacob get cozy on their infamous Moroccan rug (yes, that $2500 investment that changed everything) to reflect on a decade of conscious partnership. From their first meeting at Ray Organics to becoming parents and podcast hosts, they share the intimate moments, sacred ceremonies, and everyday choices that have shaped their journey together.

This isn’t just another anniversary episode - it’s a deep dive into how 100 episodes of uncensored conversations and 10 years of devoted partnership have taught them what’s possible when you commit to seeing each other’s highest truth.

Whether you’re in a long-term relationship or just starting out, this conversation offers a fresh perspective on what’s possible when you allow love to evolve beyond your comfort zone. Get ready for deep insights, vulnerable shares, and practical wisdom about creating a partnership that keeps expanding.

They also riff off on:
• The art of witnessing each other’s evolution
• Why trust is an active practice in partnership
• How to support your partner’s expansion
• Creating safety for vulnerability
• The power of choosing each other daily
• Navigating different seasons of love
• Sacred sexuality and transcendent connection
• Their favorite moments from 100 episodes together
and so much more…

🔥 Love this episode? Don't forget to subscribe and share your thoughts in a review. We love hearing from our listeners!

🔥 Let's stay connected:
• Follow Meg: @the.meg.o
• Follow Jacob: @thejacoboneill
• Follow the podcast: @sexloveandeverythinginbetween

Check out our posts for the 100th episode giveaway!

🔥 Want more?
⚡ Grab our relationship freebie: https://meg-oneill.com/relationship-freebie
⚡ Join CLAIMED: https://meg-oneill.com/claimed-immersion
⚡ Join DESIRE DATE: https://meg-oneill.com/desire-date
⚡ Join Full Spectrum Woman: https://meg-oneill.com/full-spectrum-woman

Ready to dive deeper? We work with individuals and couples - slide into our DMs to learn more!

#sacredpartnership #consciousrelationships #intimacy #growth #trust #vulnerability #podcast #100episodes #10years

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Yes, and I think that is what agift a relationship can be, is

(00:03):
to be witnessed in yourvulnerable moments and to let
someone witness you in thosevulnerable moments and let them
see what it means to you.
Yo yo, yo. Lovers. Welcome,welcome. Welcome to sex, love

(00:24):
and everything in between. We'rethe O'Neills. You're here with
Megan Jacob, andthis is the place we have really
uncensored conversations aboutsex, intimacy and relationships.
We're super excited you're here.
Enjoy this episode. It's a 100thepisode. It's a 100th episode.

(00:51):
What do you love about me? Name100 things, podcasting with you
is number one. I have lovedpodcasting with you. We never
fight before we film thispodcast. We don't spend three
hours processing. I don'tfeel like we've done it for
emotions with that used to haveit a lot, yeah, for those of you

(01:13):
that have been around since theOG podcasting days almost two
years ago now, we used toprocess a lot before podcasting.
Podcasting with your partner,it's gonna be talking, hi
everyone we are. It's sobeautiful because

(01:35):
actually starting a part timejob as jinglers. We're gonna
start jingle I think youwould be phenomenal at that.
Yes, are you called a jingle? Ithink you're just called a
jingle Yes, ajingler. A jingler, okay?
Because wego No. Jacob knows a lot more
about the English, English,English
language, English language. Iwant to, I want to publicly

(01:58):
apologize for gaslighting liveon podcast. I was very perturbed
after hearing about my mistake.
I was completely and utterlyperturbed go
back and listen to I think it'sbirth the Story Part Two.
I'd rather forget about it, butthat is a great episode.

(02:19):
I had so many messages from youwhere you'd screenshot the
definition of unperturbed? Yes,yeah, I take full
responsibility. I'm a man that'swilling to admit that he's
wrong. I was wrong aftergaslighting you. And yes, but I
will now be known as Jacob thejingler.

(02:39):
Okay, Jacob the jingler. So thisis our 100th episode, if you
didn't already realize, and afew days ago was our 10 year
anniversary,yes, of being together, not our
10 year wedding anniversary.
Married for two years,two years, but 10 years
together, lady. So we thought wewould celebrate our 100th
episode by also celebrating our10 years

(03:04):
together. Only seems right, yes,and
bring you an episode where we'rereflecting and bringing you,
yeah, reflections. And I don'twant to say lessons, or are they
going tobe less there's definitely
lessons, reflections and lessonsfrom 10 years together, a decade

(03:25):
together. How wild.
That's crazy. We had family overfor the weekend, and my nan and
pop, I've got all fourgrandparents still, right? This
is pretty cool. And my nan andpop, and also my granny and
pappy, they're still all alive,and they're still married. They
all got married on the same day.
Yeah, yep. So they didn't marryall as a foursome. Obviously,

(03:47):
that would be a bit weird, butmy nan and pop got married, and
then my granny and pappy gotmarried on the same day. And I
think they're up to, like, 63years married, or something like
that, 60. So they've beentogether, and they got married
pretty quick. You know, theydon't. They didn't mess around.
Back in those days, commitmentwas not a there was no avoidant
attachment style back then. Itwas all anxious attachment

(04:08):
styles. I definitelythink there was avoidant
attachment, but I think itplayed out more emotionally than
in the commitment of marriage. Ithink it was very easy to commit
to marriage, showing up in thatmarriage, very different story.
But yeah, they've been together60 I'm just gonna say 65 years.
I'm gonna throw that yeah, as aas a guest out there. Yeah, 64
probably is a bit 63 I'm gonnago with 63 I'm gonna back to my

(04:31):
original 63 years. Like that'ssix, over six times longer than
we've been together.
I know that is to think aboutthat, because this is actually
the first piece I want to bringto bring to this conversation
that and we were reflecting onthis together, we went to Byron
Bay for for our anniversary, dayoff. Went to Byron Bay together.
We did we love Byron Bay, and wetook our son, and it was so

(04:54):
beautiful, and our son had hisfirst swim in the tea tree, the
tea tree lakes, and it. Sobeautiful to our favorite book
shop. And, you know, we hadplans to like because on our
first year wedding anniversary,we had all of these questions
that we filled out together andreflected on, and I've got them
in a little like Time Capsulebox. We didn't get to do that on

(05:15):
our second one weddinganniversary because he was,
like, three days old, yeah. Andthen we thought we would do that
on our 10 year anniversary, butwith a baby, it's
you can't really do things. Justlike plan to do something and
then doit. It was very useful in terms
of, like, we got to walk around.
We got to go to all our favoriteplaces by actually sitting down

(05:36):
and writing and that. So weasked each other questions,
though, when we were at the teatree lakes and then in the car,
and it was really beautiful.
And probably had like and likewhat I said to the guys, I went
surfing with the guys lastFriday, and I said, said to
Pete, I said, it's amazing thatI'm still learning about myself

(05:57):
in this relationship. Like wehad a really beautiful
conversation, and I was like,wow, there's still parts of me
that I'm I'm discovering in thisrelationship, that I'm bringing
to the that I'm bringing to theworld, that I'm bringing to you.
And that's I'm like, wow. Like,how cool is it that even 10
years in, we're still, we'restill learning, we're still

(06:17):
growing, we're still findingparts of ourselves.
Yeah, and I, I yeah, that we hadsuch a beautiful I was going to
take the conversation somewhereelse, but I want to stay there.
That was so beautiful, like inthe car when we pulled up at the
service station, and like, wewere there was, like, something
that you brought. Because Ithink the question was, I asked

(06:40):
you, what's what do you see?
What would you love more of inour relationship over the next
decade? And you shared likenourishment. You'd love to feel
like nourished. And then theconversation went deeper and
went to other places, and it waslike a part of you, I don't
think you'd even, maybe even letyourself acknowledge in your own

(07:01):
being. But also it was like thebest information for me, like 10
years in, and I was like seeing,seeing this new desire, but from
from a different light. And itwas just so beautiful, because,
again, it's like we're 10 yearsin. It would be such a mistake
to think we knew everythingabout each other, or that we
knew exactly what the otherperson needed or wanted,

(07:26):
yeah, and that's like, that isso it almost feels so rich. It's
like, ah, there's still, there'sstill gold here, there's still
more, there's this, there'sgoing to be more, and there is
more and but it was nice to feelthat on such a special day. And
I thinkthis is where I wanted to take
the conversation before, is thatover these 10 years, there has

(07:46):
been so many iterations of us,like as individuals,
as you see from the photos Megposted, yes, if you
haven't seen the photos,everyone was like, is that,
Jacob? Oh my gosh, it lookssick. You look very different
without a beard, and you justhave 20 kilos lighter, because
all I do is eat vegan, yeah. Soyeah, you look very different.

(08:10):
And yeah, there's been manyiterations of us as individuals
in this 10 years, but manyiterations of our like Union and
our dynamic, like our dynamic,has shifted so much through that
time. And what I love, what yousaid about, like your
grandparents still beingtogether, and you know, all of

(08:32):
them still being alive. Like,what? How many more iterations
of us is there going to be,yeah, how many more? Like as
individuals, but, but as acouple? Like, what growth still
awaits us? What learning stillawait us? How are we going to
evolve together? Yeah,and I think no relationship

(08:52):
style is perfect, but when youreally choose something because
you believe in it, it's becomesthis opportunity of like, whoa,
what? Yeah, like, exactly whatyou said. What's waiting for us
in the next 1020, 3040, 5060,years of relating, considering
that the last 10 years, there'sbeen so many iterations of our
relationship and ourselves asindividuals, that's, that's what

(09:14):
comes from, you know, thechoosing this on such a deep
level and that that excites me.
It's like it's no longer aboutI'm going to be with the same
person for the rest of my life.
How boring. So I'm going to bewith so many different versions
of this person, and that personis going to get to be with so
many different versions of me.
Therefore, our relationship isdestined to become a ongoing,

(09:39):
involving experience for both ofus, which is so exciting. It now
it's not this fixed thing thatslowly dies or slowly suffers,
is this living, breathing thingthat we're constantly engaging
with, and that's exciting, yeah.
And I think, if, I think, ifpeople saw, if people could
understand, or. Be that andimplement that in their lives

(10:00):
with a relationship, it would beso life giving. It does require
vulnerability, of course, andopenness, but that, for me, is
like such a cool it's such acool way of looking at it and
not, not something I was taught.
Yeah,and I think there's two pieces
to this that I'm seeing. It'slike that to experience that, to

(10:21):
experience like you're foreverlearning your partner and
getting to experience like this,this newness and these different
textures and layers and depthand width of your partner.
There's two things there. One,as individuals, you have to be
devoted to your own growth andyour own evolution constantly,

(10:41):
like meeting your edges andexpanding. And then secondly, I
think when we relate, when yourelate to your partner, you've
got to be devoted to not holdingthem in who you believe they
are. Does that make sense? It'slike, you can't hold them in the
energetic of, I know you, oryou're always this kind of guy,

(11:05):
especially in things that youknow, patterns that your partner
might be wanting to expand pastand evolve through. And you've
got to release the grip of,like, holding them in who you
think they are. Yeah, and that'sthe only way that you can
experience different versions ofyour partner. You have to allow
them to grow. You have to allowyourself to perceive them and

(11:26):
witness them and experience themin a different way. And I think
that's been sorry. I thinkthat's been like our experience
time and time and time and timeagain, like when I think of the
man I met at Ray organics whenwe met, like, over a decade now
ago, now, like, there's still somany parts of you then that were

(11:48):
very present, like now, like somany parts of you that are just
like your core, like your yourkindness, your open heartedness,
your ability to just speak toanyone, and just like you Know,
you know, be yourself and allthese different things, but also
at the same time, you are, youare, you are completely
different. Human in the worldmassively you are, you are

(12:11):
carrier. You carry yourself sodifferently. You you inject
yourself into a space sodifferently. You are felt so
differently. The way you makemoves in the world is so fucking
different. Like, yeah, you werejust honestly a completely
different human. And that'sbeen, you know, that's been so
beautiful to witness. But also,yeah, I just think there's that,

(12:35):
like, yeah, that allowing ourpartner to to to be that and to
change is a is a process. Thei My feeling is that what, what
I believe about you, has a very,very can either have a really
positive or negative effect onhow you what you believe about

(12:56):
yourself. We're very if you'rein an intimate relationship with
another person, of course, howyou feel about them or what you
believe about them is going toinfluence them. So what I the
way that you're saying all ofthose things, which is like the
way, if I was to sum it up, islike you really accepted me for
who I was, and then you wereable to see who I was becoming.

(13:17):
And that is a beautiful skill tohave in a relationship, because
it means, okay, I love you andI'm excited to go on this
journey with you, and I'm notgoing to hide, I'm not going to
hide my excitement for whoyou're becoming. I'm going to be
and I'm going to and if youbring something to me that
you're that you want to explore,I'm going to support you and
also trust that you knowwhatever happens, whether it's

(13:39):
the most amazing result or it'sa complete flop, you know you're
still going to be you. And Ithink that's what's allowed
these, this maturation of bothof us over the past 10 years, is
that I, even though I might nothave known it on a deep level or
consciously understood it, isthat there was a level of
acceptance and a level ofexcitement for what's to come.

(14:01):
And I think that's such abeautiful, a beautiful blend for
anyone that wants to deepen inrelationship which, which I
didn't know I wanted until Irealized the blessing that comes
with it. Yeah, I think I wasvery much. I think one of my
things that this, this thisrelationship has given me is
like possibility. Before Ithought I had to, I could only

(14:25):
fit one kind of, one way ofliving, and then it feels like
having this, like being able tosit here on our couch podcast
with you on a Monday after beingfor a surf, and we're about to
go and, you know, hang out, andI'm about to roll jets. It's
like this life didn't I didn'tknow that this life could exist.
So I think there's a level ofwhen you when you start to move

(14:47):
in this way, like possibility,and you become excited for
what's to come, rather than, Oh,it's just another day with the
same woman, the same the sameday. It's not like that anymore.
And same. Like the bubbly,bright eyed, big glasses and,
you know, enthusiastic sweetpotato eating, coconut milk

(15:10):
drinking, woman that you werelike us, there's still so much
of who you were in that momentthat's here right now, but
there's now a depth and acomplexity to you that is so
much more than I could have everimagined in a woman. You like
that. Yeah, and I feel like Ican be with the depth and

(15:32):
complexity of you because of ourrelationship and how we support
each other, and finished 10years
I think there's like a paradox.
Let's go there.

(15:54):
What I've noticed in ourrelationship over the last 10
years is I love that you justsaid that, like the depth of and
complexity of like us asindividuals has deepened and our
relationship has gotten I don'tknow if it's more complex, but
like deeper and wider, and maybeyou'd say more complex, because

(16:16):
it's like the diff We'rebringing different parts of
ourselves, but simultaneously, Ifeel our relationship has always
been very simple, and we'vealways allowed our relationship
to be simple. And I actuallyremember it was our first trip
to Peru together. So we weremaybe two years in, and we went
on, you know, we went on this,like, three or four week

(16:37):
medicine pill pilgrimage with awhole lot of other people. That
was the greatest trip of mylife. I love that. Yeah,
and one of the women, Robin, Idon't know if she commented
on one of my things recently,really Robin,
I remember Robin said to us, orsaid to me one day, it was like,
right at the end of the trip. Soshe would have witnessed us, you
know, on the medicine andconnecting with each other in

(16:59):
between that and everything. Andshe came to me and she said,
wow. And again, we're only twoyears into our relationship.
Then Wow, you have you havetaught watching you has taught
me so much about how simplerelationships get to be like and
how easy your relationshiplooks. And I don't think it was
easy. I'm really obsessed withthe word easeful at the moment.

(17:21):
Yeah, easy. So it's like, butshe was just reflecting back
this thing around like, wow,you're actually teaching me that
that doesn't have to be so hard.
And I think we've ourrelationship. I think this is
one of I really love Chelsea JoHuntsman and Oren really talk
about like this blueprint yourrelationship has. And I think if

(17:42):
we look at like the uniqueexpression of our partnership,
we have a blueprint for ease.
There's a there's a part of ourBlueprint is simplicity and
ease. And I think this is a bigpart of what we're here to, to
teach or reflect through ourrelationship is that it can be

(18:04):
deep. You can hold so much ofeach other. You can traverse,
you know, darkness, and you cantraverse the complexities of
life. And your relationship andyour union is there to make
those things feel more easeful,like you have always, from the
very beginning, made My lifefeel easier. There's never,

(18:29):
there's never been Iyeah, sorry my body, did
mommy scare you?

(18:49):
Yeah, I maybe we scrapped thatconversation because I don't
feel like but do you for me?
It's for me. It's that ourrelationship has never felt like
a heavy thing that is makinglife harder.
Yeah, it's not Yeah. I feel thatour relationship has always

(19:10):
given us an opportunity forlike, like. For me, I would say
like, easier, yeah. I haven'tfelt like the our relationship,
hasn't I? How do I say thiswithout sounding
like I'm hard work? Yeah, Ihaven't
been able to come and hide in myrelationship from the work, from
life, like I can't hide here andhide from what life wants to

(19:33):
bring me like you. It is a safespace, but a safe space for me
is where I can feel like the Ican take the greatest risks. So
I'd say that you've createdsafety for me to figure out who
the fuck I am, and that is soimportant. So when you say
easeful, I feel like it's safeis probably the right word, yes.

(19:54):
I love Yes, and it's always feltokay, yeah, maybe scrap the
easy. Easeful. Piece that I wassaying, or the relationship has
never, never felt hard. Therelationship, for me, our union,
has always felt like a place Icould be myself, Yes, and that
for me is, is the easiest partsof life, when when I come up
against resistance, or thingsfeel challenging, when there's

(20:17):
parts of me that feel like Ican't be fully myself, or I
can't just, like, oh, rest intothe space, or relax into the
space, bringing the fullness ofme
and for me that having that inthis relationship has meant that
I've had to face up. I've had toconfront all the things that I
didn't want to which means ithasn't necessarily been easy,
but it's been necessary. Like,this is what my soul came here

(20:37):
to do. Yeah, so like, is I feltsafe to do so. I felt safe to do
the work necessary and take therisks and like I don't think
another woman would would have,you know, I don't know if
another woman would have beenable to inspire me to take the
leaps of faith that I have andfall on my face many times. And

(21:00):
maybe there's more, you know,failures to come. And I'm okay
with that, because I know thatthat's not going to stop us from
exploring the depths that we'rehere to explore. It's
okay, little man, I love thatpiece around, like, safety and
risk taking, yeah,and for me, that's that's
actually the scariest thing inthe world is to, like, open up

(21:20):
and actually feel the safety tobe myself. And I think a lot of
men who maybe have the, I thinkthat is, like we've talked about
this the I'm not enough for men,and I'm too much for women. Like
that's if you find, you know, ifyou find yourself in a
relationship where you have toface off with those things.
You're you're in the rightrelationship. Yes, you're in the

(21:43):
right relationship. You mightwant to run from it. Yeah, it's
not hard. It's just, it's theChoose your hard piece. You
know, people talk about theChoose your heart, and I think
that's the piece I was speakingabout before. It's like, when I
feel like the hardness ofrelationship comes when you're
not actually going to the depth,when you're fucking around, you

(22:04):
know, complaining about thesurface level shit or, like, not
actually, not actually walkingthrough the door of
vulnerability to be able toliberate the pieces that you
need to experience more depthand intimacy. It comes when you
know you're holding on to the tothe story, and you're not
actually willing to open theheart and clear the channel and

(22:26):
meet in a deeper place likethat's when Relationships are
hard, when the relationship istrying to initiate you both into
a deeper level. But neither ofyou are going there, or only one
of you is trying to go there,right? And that's the doorway
into when and I really like Idon't think I've spoken to this
in this type of way before.
Hello, my gorgeous boy. Hello,my gorgeous boy. Oh my gosh.

(22:52):
Makesure you watch this on YouTube,
beautiful little guy right now.
Hello.
I don't think I've ever spokenabout this in this way before,
or thought about it in this waybefore. But when, when I said
before, there's, there's beenmany iterations of us, really, I
think that means we have metmany initiations and said yes to

(23:16):
them as a couple like we'vesaid, even six months into our
relationship where I wasn't sureif this was true or right, or I
didn't actually think you wantedto go where I wanted to go. We
walked. I had that conversation.
You met the discomfort of beingwith that you chose to recommit
and re devote yourselves. And wewe, we met a deeper level of our

(23:36):
relationship because of that,and that's happened, you know,
time and time and time again.
Yeah,your relationship is going to
put, you know, give youopportunities to, like, meet the
meet at a crossroads of like,Hey, am I? Am I do I still want
to do this, yeah? Or the otherthing is, like, Hey, you're
ready for an initiation, andright now, I'm not really

(23:57):
needing to be initiated, but canI be with you must be your
support, just like a divisionquest like you got you come and
support for the four days thatI'm questing like you get to be,
we get to be that for eachother. I remember when you
signed up with a Shay, and Iremember that being such a huge
initiation for you, andsomething that, like I could
tell that it was so it was, itwas exactly what you needed to

(24:18):
do. And, you know, didn't makesense to me at all from a
financial perspective. However,it made sense of like, well,
we're either going this way orthis way. This way is
contraction. This way isexpansion. We're kind of
committed to expansion if we'regoing to deepen. So hey, up, you
know, and I remember that sovividly because I had to sort of

(24:42):
like, take myself away and belike, yeah, no, I trust her. And
even if this isn't, even if wedon't get the desired outcome,
we're going to get an outcomethat gives us information to
then make the next decision.
And I love that you just broughtthe piece around. You trust. You
trust. Trust me and you trustedme in that moment. I think

(25:02):
that's been one of our greatestgifts as a couple, is and I've
had to learn like this has beenone of my most improved moments
in our relationship. Would yousay yes, most? What's it called
most improved player? Or werelike, you know, yeah, like, I

(25:24):
used to try and control you, andI felt it felt uncomfortable to
my nervous system. It feltunsafe when I didn't understand
something you were doing. And Ipreferred, instead of practicing
trusting you, I preferred totell you not to do that and to
do it my way, and that wasprobably the first half of our
relationship. And I don't thinkit was as obvious, because you

(25:47):
didn't, you weren't taking asbig of risks and doing the
weird, strange, crazy shit thatyou do a lot of in our
relationship now, and just as aman now, but there was
definitely an element of me notwanting to trust you and
trusting you has become like anactive practice. And I think it
is trusting in partnershipbecomes an active practice,

(26:11):
especially if you're someonethat has trust issues or has
been hurt before, or as a woman,maybe has a tendency to want to
control your man and and, youknow, so that you feel
comfortable, trust is such anactive practice, it is. And to
be like, Oh, you want to go dothat thing. Even when you did

(26:31):
the first vision quest, it waslike, you want to go sit on a
mountain without drinking food,without drinking water or eating
food, and no one's near you forthree or four days, like, I did
not really understand that, andthat felt a little scary to me,
and yet I trusted that you werebeing called to that place. And
financial decisions we've made,like, you know, a lot of the

(26:55):
time, a lot of financialdecisions we've made in the
expansion and growth space havenot made fucking sense, no, but
we've trusted each other to go,you're being called to that
thing. You feel like this isfucking true for you do it. I'll
back you.
And those like, those beenmoments where that, like, those,

(27:17):
like, there's, there's all ofthese micro initiatory moments,
these, like, macro, initiatorymoments. And every time we've,
we've, I really feel we'veasked, like, what's the actual
like, what's the truth here? Ithink that's the thing you're
talking about with beliefs.
Like, I believe, I believe youare this versus I believe in
you. Andwe're back. We back, all right.

(27:41):
We might be doing thatregularly, pausing coming back,
yes, little boys on the boob,yeah, he's happy again. We were
talking about trust and a fewthings, and I just wanted to,
like, talk about, like, one ofthe moments I remember you like,
supporting me and being excitedfor me in a moment of expansion.
And it was when I bought thejacket and the jeans in

(28:04):
Brisbane.
I love that moment. Yeah, I loveOkay, go on, because this is a
really beautiful story.
And I remember going, I rememberwe were, hey, we went, and we
were looking at clothes andshopping for you. And I I'd kind
of always loved clothes. And Ikind of, for the years before, I
kind of just let myself be an OPshopper, and I told myself that

(28:27):
I don't like new things, and I'mjust, you know, I'm a real
thrifty person. I care about theenvironment all these things,
and deep down, I love newclothes. I love really, really
nice, high quality things. Wewent into this we went into
Nudie Jeans, which is like areally beautiful brand, and I
tried on, I think I tried onjeans first. No, did I let's try

(28:49):
on a shirt?
Was it the jacket first? No, thejacket hangs. I think it was the
shirt.
Remember there was a green shirtthat I tried on? Yes, I remember
that shirt. And then you werelike, well, you need jeans to
try on with it. So then I put onblack jeans, and then I think,
you passed in the jacket, yeah,and I, and I, like, literally,
put it on, and I was like, inthe in the change was like, I

(29:11):
felt so much embarrassment, andI didn't want to show you, like,
come out. Show me. Come out andshow me I'm like, I don't want
to, don't look me in the eyes.
Don't even acknowledge me. And Ithink it was like a I think it
was probably a part of me thatfelt selfish for wanting these
things for myself, and I feltlike I was being too indulgent,
or I was being too I just wasn'tit wasn't a very sensible thing

(29:33):
to be entertaining purchasingthese items. And I remember
coming out and you being soexcited for me. And I remember
you saying, let me buy these foryou for your birthday or for
Christmas. Can't remember whattime might have been for my
birthday or something. I can'tremember. And I remember being
like, I think I actually have tobuy these for myself. I think I
have to buy myself. I think Ihave to spend this $1,100 On

(29:58):
three items of clothing. AndI Yes, and I remember being a
bit intense at first, as usual,a bit but then I really
realized, I don't even know ifyou said anything to me, you
probably have a better memorythan me. But I remember then
realizing, oh, like you. Thiswas a really big moment for you,
and this is something I havelearned about you, is that,
yeah, when I make a bigsometimes my thing is like,

(30:23):
bring the energy. Let's make abig deal out of this. But
actually, what's better for yournervous system is like, let's
just, like, just I, yeah, it'salmost like a foreplay thing.
Yes. It's like, if I come in toohard and fast, it's almost like
my nervous feels like, Yeah, I'mtoo much attention, yeah, yeah,

(30:45):
and yeah. I just remember thatbeing a really powerful like
that was such a great weekend,and we had so many other great
moments, but like that, buyingthose clothes was such a such a
moment of like, acknowledgingmyself within our relationship
and being witnessedacknowledging and choosing
myself. And you could say thatit's just clothes or it's just

(31:07):
money, but for me, it was a realmoment of like it was an act of
self love, and it was almostlike you witnessing me in that
was very was was the mostvulnerable thing. I think if I
had have gone and bought thoseclothes on my own without you
there, I would not have had thesame experience, and I think
that is what a gift arelationship can be, is to be
witnessed in your vulnerablemoments, and to let someone

(31:30):
witness you in those vulnerablemoments and let them see what it
means to You.
Yeah, and this has just broughtto me something you actually
said in our wedding vows aroundlike I've taught you and I feel

(31:50):
exactly the same. I've taughtyou to love the parts of you
that you didn't feel werelovable. Yeah, because I've
shown I haven't run and Ihaven't gone I don't love you
anymore, or that's notacceptable. Yeah, so it's my
love. And you know how peoplesay, like you've got to love
yourself fully before someonecan love you or you can love

(32:12):
someone else? I don't believethat. Yes, I feel like there is
a certain level of consciousnessthat you have to have, an
awareness, you have to have, nothave to have, but is supportive
to have to enter into aconscious relationship where
you're able to, you know,receive deeply and experience
deep love. But I actuallybelieve part of the purpose of
partnership is to shine yourlove on the places that your

(32:38):
partner has not been taughtthey're allowed to love the
places your partner has has beenconditioned to believe aren't
lovable or they feel shamearound and this is you know that
witnessing part you just saidit's like, that's why being In

(32:59):
relationship is so vulnerablebecause we bring those parts,
and there's part of us that goesthey're going to run from this.
They're not going to love me inthis. They're going to think
this is ugly. They're going tothey're going to remind me that
this is shameful. And then whenour partner loves that part of
us, or just witnesses us withoutjudgment, that's that is

(33:22):
everything that is that is sodeeply healing, so deeply
healingand and that's what like and
like, like we said, like, that'swhat creates a new inner and
like, a new version ofrelationship that creates a new
version of you and A new versionof me, like it's itself. It's
almost like self generating.

(33:44):
It's self sustaining, when youcontinually give yourself give
yourself permission toexperience these moments. Oh,
hey, young girl comeYeah, has there been any of
those moments for you? Well,when many, oh, my God, has been
like, yeah, so many, so many, somany, yeah. But I was just

(34:10):
actually thinking about when Iwanted to buy the rug. Yes,
this is a great example. Thatwas just
so it was when I just startedmaking money in my, like, for
years I'd been in business andreally not made any money at
all. And it was the first fewmonths of, like, really starting

(34:32):
to, I think I probably had like,a 10k month or something, and
maybe, like two in a row. And wehad never bought nice things
during our relationship. No,we'd always, especially not for
the home, because, you know, wemoved a beard and, like, we'd
never bought nice things andnone of it, neither of us are,
like, incredibly, oh, my God,everything has to look
esthetically beautiful. We'redefinitely not. We're not that

(34:55):
people, those people at all.
This is probably like, fiveyears ago now. I. Yeah, I'd
started to or four years ago,I'd started to make a bit of
money, and I wanted to buy a rugfor our home. And I remember
looking and searching on. Becamequite manic. I was searching and
searching and searching for arug, and I was my budget was,
like, three or $400 and I justwanted a rug for this new home

(35:18):
we'd moved into, and I'd spent,and I'm not, like, I remember
spending like three I neverresearched shit. I'm not an
online shopper, and I just spentlike, three hours, like, looking
for this fucking rug, and Icouldn't find anything I liked.
And I remember turning around. Iremember exactly where I was. I
was on the dining room table,and you're on the couch, and I
remember turning around andbeing like, I probably, like,

(35:38):
cried or something like, I can'tfind this rug. I think it's
because I knew I really wantedto make an investment in our
home, and then it wasfrustrating that I couldn't find
something I liked.
I think we were, like, learningabout how important it was to,
like, make at the home our placeas well. We wanted to say, Hey,
this is our home. Yeah. So I cannot just the rug, obviously. So

(36:02):
there's a deeper Oh mygosh. This was not just about
the rug at all. This was like awhole initiation in itself. And
then I remember saying that toyou, or crying to you, and then
you turned to me and were like,if you have any rug at all, what
rug would you have? I was like,you're really nice. We're rugged
ones that you're like, well, buyit, buy it. But would that be

(36:28):
the rug that makes you veryhappy? Yes. And then you're
like, we're gonna go to thatshop tomorrow. And so I went to
the shop, not thinking that Iwas actually gonna buy anything,
I think you always knew. Andyeah, we're looking at all these

(36:50):
rugs. And I found the rugimmediately that I liked. And
then I was like, I think I waslooking at you a bit like, maybe
like, asking for permission. Youweren't giving me permission.
You were just like, you wantthis rug. It wasn't like, I need
your permission. You would likereminding me that I wanted this,
and I get to make the choice,and it's safe for me to make
that choice. And so I bought the$2,000 rug, and it was 2500 was

(37:12):
it? Yes, I love that. Youremember exactly. And we're
actually, my feet are on thisrug right now. And this rug
represented so much more thanjust this. This was, yeah, this.
I don't even fucking know whatthis represented.
I would say that in, especiallyin the in the entrepreneurial

(37:35):
space, and in the, you know, theper if we put ourselves in the
personal development industry,they can sometimes feel like
it's a bit of a fluke, like I'vegot, I've made the I've done the
10k month, or I've had, I've hada good run, but this will end.
This is probably this is allgoing to end eventually, and
there can be fear of that. And Ifeel like this purchase of the
rug was you saying, Hey, I'm I'minvested in this, this. I'm

(37:58):
invested in my success. I'minvested in my ability to add
value to the world and thereforereceive value that can then be
reflected in what I purchase.
And I don't want to be a $400rug girl. I want to be a
Moroccan rug from the shoppingJames Street, and that's who I
am. And once again, I thinkthere was like an acceptance of
I accepted you for who you were,and I could see that this was
who you were becoming. And if Ihad to say, just get the $400

(38:21):
one. Come on. Like, that'syou're making a bit of money,
yet that's good, but like, westill want to be, you know, on
the safe side, I don't thinkwe'll ever be remembered as
people who have smart or madelogical decisions with money,
and I'm okay with that. And Ithink we can mature and become
more refined and discerning andmore mature in our money
management, yes, but I guaranteeyou there is going to be,

(38:45):
continually throughout ourlives, opportunities for us to
do things that don't make sensewith our money, because we
believe in something greaterthan certainty, as you know,
financial certainty. And I'mokay with that. I'm kind of,
once again, I've become aware ofthe the value of that kind of
perspective, because of the lifethat we've continually created

(39:09):
over and over again, yes, andthe love and the experiences
that we've had,I Think, a big part of just
like, just like, Oh, what am Itrying to say from this rug
story and the jeans and thejacket story, I feel like one of

(39:30):
the biggest things in this islike reflecting, seeing the
truth, and this is somethingthat we've gotten really good
at, is like seeing, seeingwhere, like both of us and being
invited to go yes, and insteadof feeding into the other
person's doubt, like, let's saythe rug thing, instead of you

(39:53):
being like, Oh, is it a goodpurchase? Are you sure you want
to do that? Are you sure youput, shouldn't put? Me? Money
somewhere else, like you justsaw what I actually fucking
wanted in that moment, and youreminded me it was safe to make
that purchase. I saw that thiswas going to be initiatory for
you to buy the fucking jeans,buy the fucking jackets, spend
that money like I could see theman that you were going to be on

(40:15):
the other side of that. And Ireflected that back to you. And
I think we've done that againand again and again again with
like vision quest like certainthings we've each individually
wanted to do in ourrelationship, or as a couple,
we're devoted to not reallyfeeding the doubt or adding to
like of course, both of us havedoubt all the time about things

(40:38):
we are doing in business, thingswe're doing in life, decisions
we're going to make, but I thinkwhat has been so powerful and
who we are for each other isthat we don't add to the other
person's internal doubt. We doour best to see like what the
truth is underneath that, andremind like, bring each other
home to that. Yeah,and I think that what I really

(41:00):
want to honor in us asindividuals is we don't allow
our discomfort to tarnish, or wedon't I feel that we're very
good at and there's been momentswhere we haven't been good at
it, where we don't let Our owninsecurities influence your
right of passage.

(41:21):
Amen. And I think that's wherethe birth, like, you know, the
birth experience that you had, Ithink, is it was a culmination
of all of these experiences thatwe'd continually been on either
the giving or receiving end of,yeah, yeah. And we built a we
built a really, really beautifulfoundation of trusting each
other and also being okay withthe with our own, our own

(41:41):
insecurities, now, own doubts,and knowing that we've got
someone in our corner that cansee through them and remind us
of what we're truly capable of.
Yeah, love that. How good.
Okay, what else do you want tobring, in terms of our 10 years
together,best sex ever? What were some of
the best sex we've had in thelast 10 years? Well, we were

(42:02):
asking these questions, Yeah,mine was when we lived on
village way, yes, and we had sexagainst this the wall of our
bedroom, yeah, and I didn't evenit was actually when I was deep
in my VEDA studies, my sexualitystudies, and I was unlocking a

(42:23):
lot within myself. I was healinga lot within myself. I was, you
know, exploring a lot withinmyself. And I think on an
individual level, I was like dearmoring my body and liberating
so much of my body so I couldreceive deeper but I remember
after, I think we both orgasmtogether, and then I remember
turning to you and being likeyou. It was my first, like,

(42:45):
transcendental sexual experiencewhere I literally turned to you.
It was like, Oh, you just fuckedme to God, just then, yeah, was
the first experience where Ireally felt like, I, yeah,
almost entered this, this other,other, other realm, yeah,

(43:08):
you, I, yeah. I remember itfeels like it was we'd access
something that we hadn'taccessed before.
And it went beyond, like, thephysical sensations. It was like
I was transported somewhere elseso that, what other experience
did as experiences did I sharethe other day, I feel like when

(43:29):
we asked that question the otherday, bango,
no, no, I should not have playedwith you. Continue my love.
Gonna be all the backgroundnoise in this episode.

(43:49):
Yes, sorry, I'm gettingdistracted. Yeah, think as a
distracting dog I, I love thesex in Guatemala. Yes, which
was, what was that? Which wasbecause we had, I booked, it was
around your birthday, and we'd,I was just gonna say it was the
first time we tried that. Oh,that, yeah, it was the first
time. Yes, that. But we'd also,this was what happened, was I

(44:11):
booked a really nice place, butit wasn't the right apartment
because it didn't have a view.
Do you remember that? Yeah, andwe're
talking about this, and this is,like, where, like, I
wasn't happy with theaccommodation, and I made Jacob
go, and we had changes. Wedidn't
have a lot of money either. Wehad any business spoiled,

(44:34):
right? Okay,Django down state, and that, um,
that quarter mile trip, like wewere already redlining. I would
say I didn't think we had a lotof extra income. No, not at all.
But, yeah, you didn't like thefact that we were in a beautiful
we stayed in a really niceplace, but it wasn't the right
the right room, because itdidn't have a view and it wasn't
high enough. And I remember wehad sex in that room, but then

(44:56):
afterwards, it leaked. Yeah, andthe room leaked, and then I was
given an opportunity to go andask for more. And I was like,
this is not really good for mycurrent belief around worth. And
I had to go, and I literally hadto go down and stand up for your
desire for more. And I had to,like, reconcile that I would
actually it would feel good tobe in a nicer place for me as

(45:16):
well, but I didn't want to dothe work. I didn't want to be
uncomfortable. And that thankyou so much for being No,
I truly believe, like, I think Iused to, because I look back at
that and I'm like, That's sobratty. Why weren't you
grateful? I actually think I itwas not about the room. It was
about you. It was about youbeing a man. Yeah, it was about

(45:37):
you, like, standing up for,like, being an advocate for my
desires. You like doing the hardthing in devotion to us and what
we wanted or what I wanted.
Yeah, do, yeah, yeah, you werethe cut, not anymore, but you
are. You were the type of personjust be, oh, just like, we'll
just deal okay. It's theleaking. It's fine. It's like,

(45:58):
we'll just get over it where I'mlike, No, go and complain
immediately.
A good, a good, just want tosay a good test for this is if
you get a coffee at a coffeeshop and it's cold or it's not
to your liking, do you send itback,

(46:21):
maybe six years ago, maybe fiveyears ago. I wouldn't now I
immediately do and I make anyonewho I'm in the presence with do
it, like the other day whenwe're at our friends Miss lunch.
Yes, Jack got an EspressoMartini that he didn't like. And
I was like, I was like, takethat back, because you're going
in now when the food comesyou're going to be looking at
the food and being like, I don'teven like this fucking food.

(46:43):
Like, yeah, and that, like,everything is good. This whole
entire lunch is going to betainted with the experience of
you not getting the drink thatyou
wanted. So Guatemala, that sexwas amazing. And also the
experience like, I think, tolike, the the the initiatory
experiences of, like, when we'rewhen we're growing and evolving,
we're experiencing new planesand that like that, for me, was
such a cool experience inGuatemala. There was another

(47:06):
time when we went and stayed inthis cool little place down in
Friday hut road. And I stillthink I still remember this,
just for we went down to thiscreek and we fucked in the
creek, and I ended up being sucha beautiful really, just I
thought it was really hot andsexy, and we'd like having sex
out in nature. It felt reallyprimal. I loved that. Yeah. What

(47:27):
other times I feellike, there's so many, I feel
like we just have been togetherfor 10 years. I know we and I
also feel like, and you canprobably agree with this, after
a lot of our sex, I say that wasthe message. So I feel like I've
said that so many times that Idon't even remember after the
second engagement ring. Yeah,we're staying in a beautiful,

(47:50):
beautiful hotel. Yes,I also think a lot of our epic
sex, and I think we're rewritingthis, but now we have a child,
but a lot of our most incrediblesex has come after, like,
wanting to have sex, and thensomething clunky happens, or it
just doesn't. It's not the truthof the moment, and then we have
to wait another day or anotherthree days or something, and I'm

(48:12):
getting frustrated because Iwant to have sex. Yeah, it
always, like, almost our bestsex happens when we release the
grip of trying to have sex, andthen just the moment happens,
and it's so beautiful, totally,and we surrender to that. And I
think that isn't that that'sjust a metaphor for life, like
when you actually stop trying tomake the thing happen and you

(48:34):
just allow it to unfold.
Yeah, and I think sex for usover the years, there's been
like such an alchemical processin many of those moments as
well. I think sex has been likea very it's been a modality.
It's been a practice of healingand opening and finding new
parts of ourselves, which hasbeen really cool. Yeah, really,

(48:54):
really coolthat sex we had when we went up
to the Sunshine Coast. So muchof the good sex we have
on trips. Yeah, little sextrips.
We've had a lot of good sex athome, but when we went up the
sunny Coast when I was pregnant,that was really good too. It
was great. Sogood. Oh, yeah, making me,
makingyour horny. You're a mother now,

(49:15):
yeah, can I say that when I'mbreastfeeding, we're also
learning, like, is he asponge? Like, is he needing to
work out what'sappropriate around our child?
Okay, what else from our 10years together? Any other
questions we have for eachother? Can you hold our son

(49:35):
while I put my tongue back on?
Oh, little me. Oh, herewe go, bud. Hey. What are some
highlights for you, like,outside of, you know, the
amazing sex and the deep,initiatory moments, is there any
like, little mini moments thatyou've really loved, any kind

(49:56):
of, like, key things that we'veexperienced together? This guy,
this guy's been the best. Thisguy. Having this guy has been
incredible, yeah, but I likedwhat you the question you had
the other day was like, what wasyour favorite moments where it
was just the two of us? So,like, outside of community,
outside of, like, family,outside of any of that. And I

(50:16):
think I had these big like, Iwas obviously talking about, I
but, you know, some of thebigger moments we'd shared
together. But I also shared thatthere was like, like, I remember
this one time we were drivingdown to more woolen bar, so it
was like, it's this little townclose to where we live, and I
just remember crying in the car,like, there was a song that got

(50:36):
put on Django, get continue.
There was a song that came onthe radio, like, not the radio,
like on Spotify, and I juststarted crying. And it was just
this feeling of like, yeah, justI feel like they have been my
favorite moments together, whenI'm just like, oh, like, it's

(50:58):
all here. It's not like, it'snot the, yes, the big moments
are beautiful, like when we havegreat sex, or when we're on
holidays or when we're doingthese things, but like, my
favorite moments of our 10 yearstogether are, you know, when
we're in the kitchen cookingtogether, or when we're driving
some somewhere and our favoritesong comes on, or when, like,

(51:18):
recently, when, even before, oh,she was born, when we're in the
backyard with our dog, andyou're playing with the dog, and
I'm just like, sitting therewatching like, just these, like
everyday moments. And I do lovethat about us that we don't wait
for the big moments toexperience each other or
experience intimacy, that we'redevoted to, to experiencing
intimacy in in the simplest ofthings, and even more so now,

(51:41):
like, now we have a child, it'sthe simple moments that are the
most, like, glorious, Ithink coming, coming full
circle. It's like, yeah, it'slike, what is this relationship?
It's you or me. So anythingextra is, is that it's it's not
necessary, it's nice to have.
But like, my and where thispodcast was born was from, like,

(52:02):
when we were being in the carand we talk. And I just remember
being like, I remember talkingto the guys after surfing once
around, like, intellectualintimacy. And I was like, Oh, I
get to have deep, epicconversations with someone in my
life all the time. You know, wecome, we came up through, like,
a lot of plant medicineceremonies, and, you know, a lot
of people didn't get theopportunity to go home and talk
about it, because they didn'tit, because they didn't have

(52:23):
someone that was on thosejourneys with them. You know,
for the first four years of our,of my journey with with the
plants, we did, like, close to50 ceremonies together. Like,
that's a lot of ceremony to dotogether. And like, after that,
we then got to, like, be witheach other and enjoy the simple
moments. And I think, you know,the the foundation of our

(52:43):
relationship is simple, inbetween moments that are, that
where we get, where we are awarethat this is what's happening
right now, is the is the magic?
What's happening right now isthe magic? Yeah, the magic the
veggie garden, the the walks,you know, walks down to the
creek, the breakfasts at Dooleycourt, or the, you know, the

(53:06):
playing music at Village way, orthe, yeah, the this, so many
things that have happened. Ifeel like each house that we've
lived in has had a differenttheme. And there's been a just
like, the piece that I keepcoming back to is, like, there's
such a willingness from both ofour our hearts to stay open and
to stay committed. And I thinkthat's like, where I really feel

(53:30):
like this podcast is like,arriving. Is this a concept of
devotion? Yeah, the devotion is,there's many times where I could
have chosen comfort, and manytimes where you could have
chosen to maybe let me be mystory, and not see that I was
actually wanting more. I justdidn't know how to do that. My

(53:50):
story was stronger than thedesire.
Yeah, we're speaking about thatbefore we started this episode,
I think, like, if there's onetheme, or like theme you want to
call it, yeah, that over our 10years, it is devotion, and I
love I saw, I saw thisbeautiful, um reel lately, and

(54:15):
it was like this, this just avideo of like, an older couple,
an elderly couple. And the thingwas, every time I see an elderly
couple, I think, How many timeshave they have had, have they
had to forgive each other? Howmany? How No, not had to? How
many? How many times have theychosen to forgive each other?
And you know, I think that andforgiveness, for me, is like the

(54:38):
little things of forgiveness islike not holding someone in
resentment. So it could be the,ah, you you triggered me then,
well, that thing you did didn'tfeel like you were thinking of
me. It doesn't have to be likethese big things of infidelity,
or, you know, it doesn't have tobe these big things that we
think we only think of when wethink of forgiveness and

(54:59):
relationship. Ship. But it'strue. I think we've been devoted
to, like, clearing the channel,as we put it, we've been devoted
to not holding the other person,like at ransom. Does that make
sense for like, contempt, incontempt, not holding the other

(55:19):
person in contempt, not saying,Oh, that's okay. But actually,
like, holding on to that thingand letting that build and build
and build like we have genuinelybeen devoted to, like, keeping
our relationship clear and cleanso that we can feel each other's
hearts, yeah, and I think, Ithink that is, like the thing

(55:42):
that served us the most. We'vebeen, I don't know if this is
on, probably, yeah, we've beendevoted to keeping the channel
clear. If you don't know whatthat means, go and watch our
conflict to deeper connectionworkshop and yeah, devoted to
continually, like meeting eachother again and again and again.

(56:06):
And the key thing here, I think,that can be, it can be easily
lost with devotion, is that youfeel like you may be outgrowing
each other, or maybe someone'smoving faster and you're moving
slower. And I think it takes alot of like self inquiry to be
like, Am I willing to stay Do Ihave the staying power for this?

(56:32):
And is this, is thisrelationship important to me,
and is this relationshipimportant to my partner? And I
know there's been times whereyou've been on fire and I
haven't been and you've been soso gentle yet loving and direct
with me when I've needed thatsupport. And similarly, I know

(56:52):
you've done, you know I've donethat for you, where you may have
been wobbling and I might havebeen so sure of my path that
what you've needed iscompassion, not for me to be
like, well, we're growing apart.
So this, you know, let's, let's,let's close this chapter. And I
think that's these crossroads ofall you know, these times where
I would rather slow down thanquit on us. I would rather stop

(57:12):
and take a look at what's reallygoing on, then use that as an
excuse to get out. And that'swhat devotion is. For me. It's
like I can see the value. I cansee beyond the story, and I know
that there's value here. Andthere's a really cool book that
I haven't read, but I love thetitle of it's called choose her
every day. And I think that, youknow, we we've spoken about this

(57:34):
around like there's no suchthing as the one, but you're the
one I choose, and that can bethat's ongoing. You're the one I
choose every day, you're the oneI choose every month, every
year, every decade. And then Iget to reflect on all of the
different yous that I've chosenand all the different mes that
I've gotten to become becauseI've chosen you. And I think a

(57:57):
lot of people out there probablyreally want to get to know all
these different versions ofthemselves, but to do that, you
have to be willing to staydevoted to a path of relating
with someone that time can onlygive you that experience, time
together The reps, and that's myTED talk.

(58:22):
I really love sorry, I'm gettingquite distracted. Yeah, I really
love what you just said there.
And I feel like I had somethingto say, but it's
gone. Did he suck it out of you?
Yeah, he sucked it out of me.
All of the life force.
It's hard to concentrate withyou here.

(58:42):
I'm feeling we're sort ofgetting towards the wrapping up.
Is there anything that else thatyou want to share?
I want to Oh, I think that'swhat I was going to say. Um, I
feel like what I sometimes seein our culture is a you better
be this for me, or there's likea back door open in the
relationship. So it's like,Yeah, you better be this for me,

(59:06):
or I'm heading out there, likeultimatum style kind of thing.
And I feel like, again,something that's served us and
we've been really devoted to ischoosing the relationship and
choosing each other and and Itruly believe, and we've had
many things that have come intoour relationship, that we've met

(59:29):
and moved through, like bigthings. And I truly believe
anything could come into ourpartnership, and we would meet
each other in that. And I trulybelieve we would alchemize that.
And it's, it's like arelationship resilience, where,
if you're constantly looking atthe having the back door open

(59:49):
and kind of being like, you needto be this for me, or, ah, this
shits hard, I'm going to leaveand find someone easier. Like,
no, it's, it's, it's this. Like,and again. I think it's, I think
it's because we're devoted tothe entity of our relationship
and the union that I truly,truly believe that anything
could, could, you know, ariseand unfold in our in our

(01:00:13):
marriage, and we will meet it,and we will alchemize it, and we
will come through stronger,deeper, more connected than ever
before. Uh huh. And I know, youknow, I hope to be together in
another six decades time like,what? Oh my gosh. What are we
going to have to meet andtraverse in the next six
decades? What are we going tohave to call on? How deeply are

(01:00:36):
we going to have to bringourselves? How many more times
are we going to have to forgiveeach other. How many more times
are we going to have to do thehard thing or have the hard
conversation or meet the grittymoments? How much grief are we
going to have to feel together?
How much grief are we going tohave to witness each other feel
and move through? How much joyare we going to have to witness

(01:00:57):
each other feel and move throughlike, just all that, yeah, all
that's to come,yeah, and then one day one of us
is going to die. I knowwe're going to die together in
the same breath, holding handswith ocean, our other children
and our grandchildren around usand our great grandchildren.

(01:01:19):
That makes me emotional.
I know I love you.
I love you. I think there's Ijust want to read something. I
think that I wrote it justpopped up in my memories on
Facebook. I thought it might bea nice way to close out. Okay, I
hope I'll just make sure thatit's actually applicable.

(01:01:42):
And thank you for being with thechaos of this episode with
Django, with our baby boy.
This feels, this feels nice.
It's not, it's not, it's alittle bit. It's from 2020 so
it's like four years ago. Soit's a little bit polarity
vibes. But I just think, um,okay, go for it. It's, a it's a
post I wrote. I probably reshareit. It's a open her heart with

(01:02:02):
Your presence. Call him homewith your love. Relationships
are an opportunity to give ourgreatest gift and receive
another's when life feelspointless and I'm stuck in a
state of fuck everyone andeverything, she calls me home
with her love. It is the gentlestroke up and down my spine that
calls me home. It is a soft butfirm Hey, you've got this I

(01:02:22):
believe in you, that calls meback to the present moment. It
is her unwavering gift of lovethat has me in deep
appreciation, not only for thisgift, but her willingness to
give it unconditionally when heremotions are running high and
she is stuck in a state of Ican't take this in anymore. This
is all too much. I open herheart with my presence. It is
the honoring of her process andnot trying to solve the problem

(01:02:45):
that slows her down. It is theconscious choice to be
completely with her in themoment that lets her feel safe,
to open up to the experience. Itis my unwavering presence that
allows her to know that there isnothing she can bring to this
space that isn't welcome. All ofher is welcome. We have
different desires and gifts.

(01:03:06):
Honor your desires and openlyoffer your gifts for love knows
no condition, rule or boundary.
It honors what is present in themoment. Receives
unapologetically and gives fullywith no expectation. Love is to
be in communion with that whichis true. How good? Happy 10
years. Happy 10 years. Happy100th episode. Happy 100th

(01:03:27):
episode. Thanks for CO creatingwith me. Yeah, we've had some
pretty cool experiences and somany more to come.
Yeah, and I have loved I am justso grateful for. I'm just also
thinking back to when we decidedto start the podcast, and I
actually wanted to start onesolo, and then I think you
wanted to start one solo, and Iwas like, let's do it together.

(01:03:50):
I'm so glad we have this. Isjust, there's
been a beautiful way for us tocome together and, like, have
our own individual businesses,but like, have this as kind of
our anchor point and use, youknow our relationship is, you
know, that's our resume. Youknow how we choose to live when
no one is watching is reallywhat makes our work the standard

(01:04:10):
that it is, and allows us touphold a level of integrity in
an industry that can sometimesbe filled with smoke and mirrors
and people just blurting outtopics claiming to be experts on
when they've never really,actually done the deep work.
They've just read a book or donea seminar or a course, it's like
no to really teach this work,you've got to live it. Really

(01:04:32):
be, you know, be in this work.
You've got to live it. So yeah,I love it. I love you. I love
our son, I love our dog, I loveour life. It gets to be this
goodwith us here. Thank you for all
our OG listeners that have beenhere for every single episode,
one to 100 We love ya. Here's tohundreds more. Can't

(01:04:53):
wait for Episode 1000 andyeah, don't know what I was
gonna say. Don'tforget about the that's what I
was gonna the giveaway. So headon over to Instagram. Check out
that celebration reel. I'm notgonna go through all the what
you need to do to enter, but allof that is
limited time only. I don't knowwhat date until, but it'll be

(01:05:14):
all there on the go get it. Goget it.
Bye. Glass up and big. Love,beautiful people. Yo, yo, yo.
Thank you so much for tuning into another episode of sex, love
and everything in between. Now,if you'd like to stay connected
with Meg and I, you can head onover to Instagram and follow me

(01:05:35):
at the Jacob O'Neill and wherecan people find you lover,
at B dot. Meg, dot. Oamazing. And yeah, guys, check
out the show notes for all otherinformation in regards to what
we've got coming up. And yeah,we're super, super grateful that
you guys for taking the time tolisten in to this podcast. If
you do have any topics or anyquestions like I said, hit us up

(01:05:55):
on Instagram, and we'll see whatwe can do. Apart from that, have
a beautiful, beautiful rest ofyour day. Thanks for being here.
Big, big. Love you.