Alpha Sexuality & Men's Sexual Practice - with Justin Patrick Pierce (Pt. 2) - Sex Upgraded

Episode Transcript
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Justin Patrick Pierce (00:00):
The greater the difference between
you and your partner, thegreater the sexual charge.
So the more you're exclusivelyan alpha and the more your
partner is exclusively an omega,the hotter that sex is going to
feel.

Taylor Johnson (00:14):
Hello, friend, and welcome to the Sex Upgraded
Podcast, a podcast for men, allabout sex, where we'll combine
real, authentic anddown-to-earth conversations
about sex life and relationshipswith some pretty wild personal
stories, and practicaldown-to-earth conversations
about sex life and relationshipswith some pretty wild personal
stories and practical how-toepisodes, as well with guest
experts from around the world,to help you have the most
amazing sex life you canpossibly have.

(00:35):
My name is Taylor and I'll beyour host on this journey, and
it's my goal with each episodeto give you practical,
actionable things you can startdoing today to improve your sex
life and your entire life.
To improve your sex life andyour entire life, because a
thriving sex life will help youthrive in all areas of your life
.
So let's begin today's episodeby starting with a deep breath
in through the nose, into thebelly together, exhaling with an

(00:59):
audible sigh, and let's get into today's episode.
Welcome back to part two of thisconversation.
Welcome back, justin PatrickPierce, to the conversation, and

(01:22):
if you're listening right nowor watching this on YouTube,
this is actually part two of aconversation that we had a few
weeks ago and that episode wentso well and there were so many
pieces left that I wanted todive into that.
I asked Justin if he would beinterested in doing a part two
and he said yeah, of course.
So here we are.
Thank you, justin, so much forbeing here.

(01:43):
Thank you, listener, for beinghere, and if you haven't first
listened to that episode aroundsexual polarity and Alpha Omega
consciousness, I would recommendgoing back and listening to
that first, because that willgive you a really good frame for
all the concepts that we'regoing to be using here, and
we're going to jump into somethings with the assumption that

(02:04):
you already know some of theterminology that we're going to
be using.
So, yeah, that's the intro thatI wanted to give and, justin,
welcome again.
Is there anything you'd like toadd before we start getting
into it?

I'm just really excited to hear that you
appreciated our conversation andwanted to dive deeper, so I
just I'm grateful to be herewith you.

Looking forward to this.
Awesome, yeah, thank you, andthank you to everybody who
listened, who sent me questions,follow-up questions for Justin.
In this episode I got some goodones to share and just to give
a brief outline of some of thetopics I want to go into today,
just so we're all on the samepage I want to talk about the
cultivation of alphaconsciousness in sex, but also

(02:45):
in life in general and how wemove through the world, because
that was a juicy part from thelast conversation I want to talk
about how do you penetrate theworld as alpha consciousness,
what does that even mean as aman?
How do you do that withintegrity?
I want to talk about how to dothat.
What do we cultivate, or whatshould men cultivate, if they're

(03:06):
single and they're wanting toget into a relationship, because
we talked a lot about how to bein long-term relationship.
What are some things men mightwant to cultivate, yeah, if
they're going into a newrelationship, and what's the
role of Omega in all that?
You know.
So the flip side of Alpha.
A couple more things.

(03:28):
There's a really cool piece thatmy partner, naima, and I
experienced in the workshop withJustin in London.
It was around the sexualcircuit and keeping sexual
energy flowing.
I want to get into that.
And then I want to explore yourmodel of sexual polarity too,
and we'll put the graphic ofthat up on screen later in this
episode, because it's so cooland so useful to see a visual
depiction of how sexual arousaland charge can actually come
into a relationship and beintegrated in a really potent

(03:50):
way, and so you don't have toremember all those things.
I have an outline here, but Ijust wanted to give us all a
little frame for what I'mexcited to get into today.
And yeah, I'd love to startwith the cultivation of alpha
consciousness in the world andto start with something you said
In our last conversation.

(04:11):
You said one of the dangers ofbeing too much in omega for a
man is a man's lack of abilityto penetrate the world, and I'm
curious what does that mean toyou and could you expand on that
a little bit?

Yes, first of all, I love this topic
of exploration.
I think this is a very powerfulsubject matter and, if you'd
allow me to, I would really liketo break it down into its
fundamental elements, soeveryone understands what we're
talking about here, please, andhow this then becomes an

(04:54):
expression into our intimaterelationship and then leads to
us being able to penetrate theworld in a powerful way.
We have to begin withconsciousness itself.
Some teachers might refer tothis as pure awareness or

(05:15):
awareness.
Some teachers might refer tothis as I.
Some teachers might refer tothis as emptiness.
Some teachers might refer tothis as emptiness, but where I'd

(05:35):
like everyone to begin is thisconsciousness that we're talking
about, that is alpha, isalready your present condition,

(05:57):
the part of your experienceright now, in this moment, that
is aware, that is awarenessitself.
That is like the screen to themovie of your life, to the movie
of every moment.
So consciousness is the part ofyour experience that does not
change.
It's the you that is neverchanging, and some people hear
this initially and like, ok,well, what of me?
What's me and what's everythingthat's changing?
And some people think they'retheir thoughts or they're their

(06:18):
body or they're their emotionsand what this teaching is
helping us realize is no, you'renot your thoughts, you're not
your body, you're not youremotions.
Because when we sit and weinvestigate our direct
experience of our own thoughts,emotions and body, we recognize
those are always changing.

(06:38):
The body's been changing fromwhen you were five years old to
when you were 15, to when youwere 20, to when you were 30.
Your body's constantly changing.
So which form of your body isthe real?
You, right, yeah, your thoughtsare changing moment to moment
to moment to moment.
So which thought is you?
Which emotion is you?

(06:58):
And what we find is that us, inthe pure form of consciousness
itself, is none of the above.
It's no object that we couldpossibly observe or perceive in
any sense.
So the alpha practice?
There's only one alpha practice.
There's only one alpha practiceit's to rest as consciousness,

(07:24):
it's to realize that you arethat I, that is infinite,
perfectly free, formless.
And that's what all of theseteachings are intended to reveal
to us that we are that I, thatconsciousness, that alpha whole,
that consciousness, that alphawhole.
So the first practice would beto rest as that consciousness.

(07:48):
And there's a lot of spiritualpractices that teach this, that
do this.
There's many popular teacherstoday teaching this modality to
men and women, and what weobserve as we explore
consciousness consciousness isnot a man thing and not a woman
thing, right?
Consciousness is not a manthing and not a woman thing,
right?
Consciousness is what all of usare.

(08:08):
We are that same consciousness.
Right?
And that's one of the primaryreasons in my teaching I don't
use the words masculine andfeminine, because I think often
it gets confused that men areconsciousness and women are
something other thanconsciousness.
Here we're trying to explorewhat is true, what is absolutely
true, what is universally true.

(08:29):
And the truth is is that we areall that pure awareness, that
pure consciousness.
That principle is what we areas we rest into that experience,
using different forms ofmeditation or other forms of
practice to it, to wake up andrealize our condition as pure
consciousness.

(08:50):
It doesn't require anything ofthe body we we could, as many
sages over thousands of yearshave done like.
Let's take Ramana Maharshi, forexample.
Ramana Maharshi realized,perfected consciousness, and

(09:14):
anyone who knows Ramana MaharshiI mean.
His body became very decrepit,he went through like a full
death process to arrive at thatplace of pure consciousness.
So, while he is a perfectexample of a living embodiment
of consciousness purified in ahuman being.

(09:37):
What we'll also notice is he'snot very sexually polarizing.
He's not very sexuallypolarizing.
Yeah, he's not the beacon oflike sexual confidence and this
polarizing character that makespanties wet.
Right, some people might beturned on by his vibe, but for

(10:03):
the majority of folks, when wethink about sexuality, sexuality
we don't think of ramanamaharshi as being a sex symbol,
totally.
So this exploration, the sexualyogas, is how do we as men, if
we want to bring more of thatalpha quality, first recognize

(10:23):
ourselves as that consciousnessbut then begin to bring that
awareness of consciousnessthrough our body, mind, such
that it expresses itself in away where the force of our
consciousness can be felt andexpressed as intimate love, as
something that penetrates ourpartner and penetrates the world

(10:46):
.
So let's talk about this oneidea of confidence.
Right, because confidence is athing that every woman wants in
a man and men even want inthemselves.
Men want to feel confident.
They want to feel confident intheir work in the world and they
want to feel confident in thebedroom and in their
relationship.
And men struggle withconfidence a lot.
Well, where do we get thisconfidence that's taught in this

(11:08):
body of work Well, in ourWestern world we have a lot of
strategies to develop confidencethrough skill building.
Our world is focused onself-development.
Let's develop ourself and we'llbecome the greatest version of
ourself and we'll learn thisskill's.
Develop ourself and we'llbecome the greatest version of
ourself and we'll learn thisskill and that skill and we'll
develop this and develop that.
And in fact, a lot of theteachings that explore masculine

(11:32):
and feminine dynamics andmasculine training are built in
this vein.
They're built on saying youwant to be a better man?
Well, you got to like, runthrough this obstacle course and
you got to sit this way and yougot to breathe this way and you
got to do this thing.
And all of that is greatpractice and great tools, just
like a great workout serves you.

(11:54):
But what I tend to observe isthere's a missing of the
fundamental awareness that'sneeded for real depth and
transformation to take placeinside of any practitioner,
which is understanding wherewe're doing this from.
And so when people pursueself-development, they're trying
to make themselves great sothey cannot fail.
So I could have this kind ofconfidence where I'm strong

(12:16):
enough, I'm smart enough, I'msuccessful enough, where nothing
can break me or push me down,and from that vein of
self-development, while we stillcontinue to protect ourself,
we'll find that our confidenceis fickle, it's fragile, it's

(12:37):
temporary, it's a facade ofsorts, because the moment she
criticizes you, the moment shebreaks up with you, the moment
this happens or that, yousuddenly feel I'm a failure.
And it's even worse becauseyou've done all this
self-development work to begreat and now you're failing.
So your confidence was built ona mound of sand.

Yeah, and what I'm hearing you describe it also
in seeing your body motions,I'm getting the visual or the
conceptual feeling that they'realso sort of like lost in the
sauce of it.
You know, just like so immersedin it, kind of missing the more
expanded perspective.

Justin Patrick Pierc (13:20):
Absolutely .
And so when we wake up to therealization that we are
consciousness itself, then weactually become indestructible,
immortal, and that's a realelement of achievement in these
spiritual paths.
That idea of immortality wascertainly taught in the taoist

(13:41):
tradition.
What do do they mean byimmortal?
Do they mean live forever, ordo they mean realizing the you
that is already immortal anduntouchable?
And when we wake up to theawareness that we are, we
recognize that awareness isuntouched, unharmed by anything
that comes our way.

(14:02):
And so as we develop thispractice in alpha, we must come
from that understanding firstthat you already are
consciousness itself.
It's not about achieving somehigher level of consciousness
that you may one day become andthen you will earn your manhood.
Then you will earn your manhood.

(14:22):
That's again building yourentire identity on a mound of
sand.
From this position you'restanding on a foundation that
can withstand the test of time,because you know yourself as
consciousness itself and nothingcan take that away from you.
Nothing can harm that you, you,nothing can harm that.

(14:45):
You will never be lesser thanthat, and it's that awareness
that brings a real confidence inus and human beings.
And so when we practice alpha,we must practice from that
fundamental position of knowing,and that's why I say there's
only one alpha practice To restas consciousness, to know
yourself as that consciousness.

(15:06):
Everything else is just tricksto try and build a superior ego,
a superior form of selfhoodwhich, at the end of the day, is
just subject to fall apart sowhen we're using the words

(15:27):
penetrate the world, I'm gettingthat to mean let's see, how do
I articulate this?

like I'm, say, I'm in the work meeting, you
know, or I'm going to give apresentation outside of the
sexual context, I go in and,instead of being sort of lost in
the sauce of all the ideas andthe things that I want to make
sure I convey, I I'm first likeanchoring within myself and
resting back in a more expandedawareness, while also being able
to bring these other thingsthrough.

(15:56):
But it's from that space ofexpanded awareness that I then
enter the room of the meetingand then I then begin speaking
from that place, versus sort ofbeing lost in the sauce, and
then that level of awareness andthe words that come from that
place and the posture that comesfrom that place is going to be

(16:17):
more impactful and penetrativein the sense of, yeah, being
more impactful or being moreeasily digestible or more yes.

Yes, yes, and what we'll find is that
each of us has our own uniquerelationship with the embodiment
of consciousness.
So we'll get to that next stepin the embodiment of
consciousness.
But what I want to say is thatwhen we embody the full force of
our consciousness and expressit out, people can be very
intimidated by it.
People can feel very scared oreven threatened by it, even when

(16:50):
you mean no harm.
You can have a perfectly openheart with pure intentions, but
just because of the way you sitand speak so directly, the way
you breathe your whole body,it's intimidating to feel that
force.
So a lot of people learn toshrink to make themselves feel
safer.
So let me hide that strength,let me retract from my body,

(17:13):
because I don't want tointimidate anyone.
I don't want to.
I don't want to penetrate theroom, I don't want to penetrate
you when I talk to you.
I want to be safe.
So we hide our strength and webecome disembodied, our breath
becomes shallow, our shouldersround.
We might start to sit and leanlike this, where we're now
hiding the strength of thatconsciousness in our form.

(17:36):
Yeah, now the first thing thatwe want to learn as we do this
art form is we want to stophiding and, as we do, this art
form is.
We want to stop hiding, we wantto learn what it is when I take
this consciousness that I haveand I actually start by bringing
it through my whole body.
What happens when I sit in away where every muscle in my

(17:57):
body is innervated withconscious awareness, where I'm
aware of the position of myknees, of my spine, of my hands,
of my knees, of my spine, of myhands, of my shoulders, when
I'm aware of the breath that Itake every breath I take, I'm
aware, I'm aware of the flow ofthe breath.
As I inhale, I draw the breathdeep down into my whole body and

(18:19):
as I exhale out, the breathrise up through my whole body.
Now I'm becoming very presentand conscious because I'm
letting that consciousnessinnervate my body.
And now this is the embodimentof consciousness.

This is where we start to actually run that
consciousness through our form,and that, of course, this is
really important stuff becauseresearch has shown that I think
it's 93% of creating or 93% oftrustability in terms of human

(18:59):
relationships, comes from bodyposture, body language and tone
of voice and speed of speech.
Speech, which you could say isall an embodiment of
consciousness, you know so themore you're able to craft an art
form through your posture ofconsciousness like, the more
effective you're going to be,like in everything.

Everything , yes yes, and then that's the
area we get into aroundintentionality, right, because
there's the embodiment of alphaand there's the embodiment of
omega.
And when you're interactingwith another human being,
whether it's your intimatepartner or a friend group or
business colleagues, sometimesbringing just pure alpha to

(19:43):
those interactions isn't theright thing.
Alpha to those interactionsisn't the right thing, it's not
the right tone to the moment,right?
So oftentimes when I teach andI speak, I'm bringing more of
that alpha quality.
So it could actually beoff-putting to people the way
that I speak and the way that Isit, because that's not what
they want.
What they would need is theywould need me to kind of soften

(20:03):
up and loosen up and be a littlesmiley and a little more
animated and really expressivein my feeling, which now that's
all omega energy, and that omegaenergy feels safe and fun and
playful.
I'm like, hey, this guy's fun,he's a cool guy.
So this is why it's importantto develop both alpha and omega

(20:26):
qualities in our own experience.
So we want to be able to runboth those energies through our
nervous system such that when weare in front of our intimate
partner or walking into abusiness meeting, you know how
to tune to one or the other.
What's appropriate now?
What's appropriate now.
What's appropriate now.
What's appropriate now?
Because if you have so muchOmega energy in you, you don't

(20:49):
know how to sit still and beserious and look someone in the
eye.
They may not trust you with amillion dollars Totally.
So you need to be able to havea depth where you could anchor
in and they can feel yoursolidity and your seriousness.
Right, that's an important part.
They're feeling can I trustthis person?

(21:09):
But if you're always an alphaand always that serious, they
may also have a difficult timetrusting you as well, cause they
say this person's not relatable, they're not fun.
You know, I can't feel theirheart is what would often be
said yeah, so then it would bevaluable for that person to
develop more Omega expressionbecause someone says oh, now I

(21:33):
can feel your heart, you know.
So that person now shares apersonal story about how they
felt one day and suddenlyeveryone falls in love and goes
oh, I can relate.
That's so beautiful, as opposedto the person who's always
pulled back and never sharinganything personal, which feels
too cold.
So the reason why my body ofwork is broken down in the way
that it is is because alpha andomega embodiments serve, and,

(21:57):
whether you're man or woman, itwould serve you to develop both
of these capacities, and evenjust talking about your intimate
relationship, because there'stimes for you to be alpha and
there's times for you to beomega, and by having access to
both, you become a masterfullover.

Yeah, yeah, and I'm going to expand that
Masterful lover in sex andoutside of sex Lover with the
world too.
This is one thing I so I reallyappreciated when Naima and I
came to the workshop with you inLondon this piece around how
you in London seemed tointentionally embody these

(22:34):
different polarities, even inyour teaching, even in how you
greeted people, and it was coolto feel that.
So we got there and London waslike hey, so good to see you,
like giving the hugs, likewhere'd you come from?
All this body movement typestuff, and you were more like
the handshake, the directed,focused consciousness piece.
And I've seen you in othervideos and photos you posted on
social media, you know, withyour kids and like you can

(22:56):
totally do the Omega thing.
But in that context it was verycool to feel the contrast and
feel the transmission of both ofthose and yeah, I like that.
Like, if you've been watchingthis, the video version of this
episode, you would probably evensee a different flavor and how
Justin expressed those twodifferent modes just physically,

(23:18):
visibly in his body, and it'sjust cool to see that.
And I love getting into thenuance of that, because then
when we're talking about theability to shift between that
sort of alpha and omega styleembodiment.
Uh, I can imagine playing withthat in so many different areas
of life, right, like I'm amusician and I could drum from

(23:38):
an alpha sort of embodimentspace or a more omega sort of
embodiment space and you couldbe a DJ from that space, or you
could be a dancer and like playwith all these different
energies and it's just very cool.

The model is very cool yeah, and that's
how we think about it.
It's like imagine everyonelistening.
Imagine that you've been goingthrough the most of your life as
a pianist sitting in front of apiano and you have different

(24:13):
notes you can play to expressyourself in the world.
And what happens?
As we grow up, as a result ofour genetics, as a result of our
environment that we were raised, we tend to fall into these
habits of expressing ourself ina certain way were raised, we
tend to fall into these habitsof expressing ourself in a
certain way, so we find our likefive or six notes that we like
to play, and we just play thosefive or six notes, six notes
every situation we're in, and wethink, well, this is me, I'm

(24:37):
these five or six notes, and ifyou don't like it, screw
yourself, but these are my notes, this is who I am.
Love me or love me not.
This is what, what I'm, this iswhat I bring to the table in
this body of work.
What alpha and omega opens up is?
It opens up every key on thepiano and we learn how to
practice the lowest note.

(24:58):
What is the lowest note?
Where we rest back deeply intoconsciousness itself, where we
rest in that still place, wherewe're not even speaking, where
we just take that vow of silenceand rest in that space of being
consciousness itself.

(25:18):
And then we learn how to playeach and every note until we get
to the highest note.
Well, we learn how to expressourself and play artistically
through dance, through sound,all of these forms where it's
the complete opposite of that,and one way a lot of listeners
can relate to this.
It's like if you want to knowthe epitome of alpha practice,
go to a Vipassana meditation.

(25:40):
And if you want to know likethe further end of the spectrum
of Omega practice, go to a fiverhythms dance class and within
that you have this range of twovery different embodiments, but
deeply spiritual practices,deeply healing modalities for
both men and women.
Now, if you want to know whatpolarity is, imagine a Vipassana

(26:04):
meditation where everyone issitting still and quietly and
then all those five rhythmdancers come right into the room
and just start dancing andmoving and blasting music, and
all the meditators are going ah,what are you doing?
You're bothering me, you'redisturbing my peace, and all the
dancers are going.
You're so boring, why don't youget up and move?
You need to live like this, andthat's the tension between
alpha and omega that existsinside of every intimate

(26:27):
relationship.
At some level or another, we'regoing to feel those competing
forces challenged, and if wedon't understand them, we'll
become resentful of our partnerbecause they're different than
us in those ways, and so byunderstanding both of them
inside of ourselves, we thenhave compassion and space for
our partner to also occupy thosepoles, and there's an

(26:47):
understanding and appreciationof the gifts that alpha has to
give and the gifts that Omegahas to give.

Yeah, beautiful, let's all take a breath to that
, yeah, so I want to, with thatthread, go into a piece around
sexual embodiment cultivation,but first jump back and share a

(27:17):
quick personal story around theembodiment and posture piece
because it came to me and I feellike it would be useful.
About a year and a half ago Iwas at this somatics workshop
where, long story short, we dida lot of work with posture and
we did a lot of work withnoticing how the posture
impacted another person'sperception of us or experience

(27:38):
of us, whether we're moreapproachable or trustable or
open hearted, et cetera, thatsort of thing.
It's very cool stuff and areflection that I got from one
of the instructors of that wasTaylor it seems like it looks
like you're making yourselfsmaller, actually, or or
actually no, it kind of lookslike you maybe don't care or

(27:58):
you're a little apathetic withhow you're holding yourself and
internally I remember thinkingwhoa that's crazy, because I
care so much Like I care so muchabout this experience in this
person and I want to beapproachable and I want to be
connective with them.
And so what I was doing I didn'teven wasn't aware of it at the

(28:19):
time, but I was standing with mylegs further apart, more like a
triangle type stance, insteadof standing straight up, and
there was almost like a restingback, but in like a very casual
way.
And what I learned through kindof speaking it out was that I
was actually making myselfsmaller and I was lowering my

(28:39):
height, making myself smallerbecause I'm a kind of tall guy,
that's kind of fit and strong,and I've had the story sometimes
that all people get intimidatedby that or, especially if I'm
interacting with a woman orsomebody who's shorter than me,
I should just drop myself downto their level.
And I didn't even realize thatwhat that was doing was.
It was making people feel likeI didn't actually care in some

(29:02):
way, and not only that, but Iwasn't giving them the
opportunity to receive me in myfullest expression of being an
integrated man, you know, andthat that was limiting my
connection in the world.
And so it was a really cool,nuanced piece to play with, and
I started in the workshopexperimenting with standing up

(29:24):
straight and not slouching atall, not leaning back, and it
was very uncomfortable at first,but then, through the
reflections of other people, Ilearned that that was actually a
more trustable posture, likethere was a little bit of an
edge to it in a certain way.
But there was also this theyfelt like oh, there you are,
like I can feel you now, and itwas a really beautiful learning

(29:48):
and I share that.
Just to say that there are somany ways we might be doing
something and we're not evenaware of it, with our posture,
that's not allowing ourself tobe in a full expression of our
consciousness, and that may behaving some impact that we're
not aware of at all.

It's absolutely having many impacts
we're not aware of all the time,and so a large part of this
practice is to become aware ofthat.
And there's two layers to whatyou just shared that I want to
point out, that I think arereally important and I think
they can only really beunderstood.
For many years in this inquiry,working with thousands of
people in this exploration, inthis inquiry, working with

(30:29):
thousands of people in thisexploration and it's kind of the
first step of this process islike people are going to feel
like, well, how do I find myauthenticity?
How do I stand like theauthentic me, how do I embody my
authenticity Right?
And that's a great first step.

(30:49):
That's a beautiful practice,but it's also not the full,
complete practice.
So what we do is we go yeah,well, when my hands are kind of
in front of my body, I'm closingoff the front surface of my
body, and when I separate myhands, I'm more available and
present automatically, becausethe front surface of my body is

(31:10):
revealed and it communicates toanyone there.
I'm open and available to youand this is why, whenever we
feel awkward or nervous, weimmediately put our arms up in
front to guard the front surfaceof the body.
So this is one example.
Avoiding eye contact is another.
So looking at someone in theeyes is also a demonstration of
I'm here with you, I'm presentwith you.

(31:30):
As we learn these skills, wealso start to calibrate how
finely tuned we need to makethis, because if you just start
staring everyone in the eye thatyou're talking to, people are
gonna start to get experiencelike Whoa, this, this, this
guy's intense, this is a bit toomuch, right.
And in my own training, like Ihad to go through that phase, I

(31:54):
had to straighten my spine tothe degree where it was too much
.
I had to sit to the degreewhere it was too much.
I had to look in the eye whereit was too much.
I had to breathe to the pointwhere it was too much and run
too much through my nervoussystem until my body like
stretched into this new way ofbeing before it could actually
begin to relax into somethingthat was a little bit more

(32:14):
authentic.
So sometimes we're learning toplay these notes just like
playing the guitar, singing.
You want to stretch yourfingers, you want to stretch
your vocal cords to hit notesand play things that are not
comfortable and way out of yourcomfort zone and challenge
yourself like, oh, this is sohard to sit this way, breathe
this way, this is so hard for mybody, and do it to the point

(32:34):
where suddenly, it starts tobecome now natural to you.
That's fundamental to all formsof yoga.
So that's what we're doing herein this practice.
Now, um, we start to get to thefeedback, or the point where
others are saying, yeah, I trustyou more, I feel you present,
you feel sincere or authentic tome in the way that you're
showing up.
But as we fine tune ourpractice, it becomes less and

(33:02):
less important to us.
Am I being my authentic self?
Am I being my authentic self?
And the question becomes is theway I'm showing up right now
serving the person in front ofme?
Because why am I interactingwith this person at all?
Am I doing this for selfishreasons, where I don't care my

(33:23):
impact on you, or am I engagingin you in a way where I actually
want to serve you and I want tobe of service of you?
Or am I engaging in you in away where I actually want to
serve you and I want to be ofservice of you?
And in this way, because we'vepracticed these different notes
and scales.
We can sit in front of someoneand immediately detect.
I'll give them eye contact.
Oh look, this eye contact istoo intense for them.

(33:44):
I'm going to blink and I'mgoing to turn my eyes away for a
moment to make them feelcomfortable, and then I'll bring
more eye contact back when Isit like this.
Oh, this is a littleintimidating for them.
So I'm actually going to softenmy shoulders and turn my body
slightly to calibrate to theircomfort level so they feel safe.
But then I'm going to bringback my strength and come back

(34:06):
into an open body posture toshow them it's OK, I can be in
my strength, and come back intoan open-bodied posture to show
them it's okay, I can be in mystrength and I can be safe too.
So our inquiry is no longerabout am I being my authentic
self?
Because in this practice, whatwe're ideally remembering is
that our authentic self isconsciousness itself, it's not

(34:27):
the body, mind.
So I'm already consciousnessitself, I'm already every note
on the piano, and now can Ipress my consciousness through
this body, mind in a way thatexpresses love and is of service
to the person in front of me?
And that's what sexual yoga isall about Every practice that we

(34:48):
do is training you to be withyour intimate partner in this
way that you learn how to sit,how to breathe, how to look, how
to communicate in a way thatactually serves them, opens
their heart, makes them feelsafe, makes them feel
appreciated and turns them onsexually.
So you learn all of the notesthat turn them on and you have

(35:10):
no preference, no judgment.
You have such freedom in yourexpression, in your body, that
you can adapt to be of service.
But what I want to say foreveryone listening is you're not
people pleasing.
You're not people pleasing.
Yeah, you're not doing this,just I'll do whatever you want.

(35:33):
I'll become any shape that youwant, I will.
It's not coming from that placeand if we have, if there's a
lot of people have that problemor that story in their minds.
We want to break ourselves freefrom that.
So if that's you first, you dowant to focus on this, finding
your authentic embodiment andtruth coming through your body.
But again, once we develop that, it's okay.

(35:55):
I've got this thing called myauthentic self, which for me
there's no limit of you canauthentically become any note on
the piano.
Honestly, it's just what areyour preferences and habit
patterns.
But once you liberate that,it's no longer about you, it's
about being of service, andthat's where I think this really
becomes a path of devotion, notonly to our lover, but also

(36:18):
towards the world yeah, that'sbeautiful.

And then, and the actual visual model of your
whole map of polarity and chargeand alpha and omega
consciousness devotion is at thetop on the upper triangle and
we'll put that on screen at somepoint so viewers can see it.
And it's in your book too.
Yeah, thank you for that.
So I'd love to bring this intothe sexual cultivation context

(36:50):
and and actually outside ofpartnership with somebody else,
cause we had anotherconversation once, uh, where I
was bringing questions around.
Well, I'll just I'll just kindof ask a question in a similar
way again.
And a lot of self-pleasure,self-cultivation practice that I
have done, especially in thepast when I first started going

(37:12):
on my own journey to overcome myown sexual dysfunction, was
very pleasure, immersive, right,I would lay down and focus on
experiencing pleasure all overmy body and moving and writhing
around and just trying toreprogram from years of watching
porn and years of unhealthymasturbation habits, and it was
very effective over time in alot of different ways at

(37:35):
bringing my erection backwithout needing porn.
It was helpful for me toovercome premature ejaculation
and helpful for me in a lot ofdifferent ways.
And also there was an elementthat was missing to that that
I've really enjoyed playing withover the past year and finding
a lot from your work.

(37:56):
And there's this when we talkabout alpha or omega embodiment
type stuff, my story was that Ispent a lot of time in this sort
of omega embodiment of sexualexploration with myself, you
know, and that impacted how Iwas able to show up in sexual
relationship with another person.

(38:16):
So the question is through solosexual cultivation, you know,
if we want to be the fullspectrum or be able to go in
both directions, what are somealpha embodiment type things
that we could practice in thosecontexts?

First, I want to say that your
exploration in Omega and yourawareness of that has been an
incredible gift to you and, Iimagine, your intimate partner
as well.
And that's exactly what I'mreferring to.
If you were the kind of guy whowas so obsessed with being
masculine, masculine practice,you never would have gone there.
You would have been afraid toplay those notes on the other

(38:58):
end of the piano and be like, oh, I'm a man, I shouldn't be
moving that way or doing thosethings or feeling these ways.
So there's an avoidance ofthose skills.
But what you've done is youspent a deep study, exploring
Omega notes for yourself, right?
And what I want to point out is, as you do this, there's
nothing fundamentally womanlyabout that.

(39:19):
It doesn't make you less of aman.
Exploring those components ofyour body.
Your biology is able to do allof those things.
Biology enables, cultureforbids, so it's the stories in
our mind that only forbids us,but your biology is able to do
all of those things Biologyenables, culture forbids, so
it's the stories in our mindthat only forbids us, but your
biology is able.
So you've explored that andthat is an incredible gift.
And what I hear you saying islike I'd like to explore now the

(39:39):
other end of the piano andlet's get into those alpha notes
.
What are those alpha notes thatI could be training in my
nervous system?
So what it like for you?
You'd be benefited by it.
The same way you studied omegato now study sexuality, almost
exclusively through this alphascale until they really feel

(40:00):
balanced.
And then you now have theartistry.
I could bring the lowest note,I can bring the highest note, I
could play some middle notes,and that's where your liberation
and sex comes from.
Is that full capacity?
So what I'm hearing you say islike, let's explore some of
these alpha notes.
What are they?
Yeah, is that true?

Yes, yes, and so for clarity, I do love
exploring some of those alphanotes.
I love holding my partner down,I love some of what would fall
into that category and I noticedmy I think my predisposition
falls more into the Omega typespace because of all the things
that I've cultivated and I seehow that actually like.

(40:42):
There is great beauty in thatand I've become an amazing lover
with my partner because of thatand so deeply appreciated by
her, become an amazing lover,you know, with my partner
because of that and so deeplyappreciated by her.
And also there's this piecethat I think could serve our
relationship more and it's coolto like go into this in you know
my own process in thisconversation, but by cultivating
more of this kind ofself-pleasure.

(41:03):
That is more in the alphaembodiment type space.

Yes, so what does that?

look like.

Well, I just want to refine what you
said.
Yeah, please, because Iwouldn't use the word more.
I would just say serve yourrelationship in another way.
Right, because I don't want togive undue importance to alpha
for you, because if you were allalpha, yeah, what would serve
your relationship?
More would be more of the omega100.

(41:31):
So we want to really thinkabout this is we can always add
these skills.
They're going to amplify ourexperience intimately.
That's why I've been doing thisfor so long and my journey is
not even close to over.
I'm in the middle.
There's no end.
There's apps, and that's whatmakes intimacy and sex so fun in
a committed relationship,because when you start

(41:52):
practicing this, practicing thisin your relationship, your sex
feels like a never-endingjourney that's always hot, fun,
deeply engaging, spirituallyuplifting and nourishing.
It's just incredible.
So this is what we get into andthere's always more.
There's always more, for sure,lifelong student?

Yeah, absolutely .

Yeah, absolutely, london and I.
We are lifelong students ofthis work, no doubt.
So when we get into the alphapole, remember our primary
practice is resting hisconsciousness and what we want
to do is you would first benefitfrom doing a seated meditation
practice for, let's say, 30minutes to an hour, before you

(42:36):
even work with your intimatepartner and I described this
practice in detail and playingwith fire in the book.
But you want time on your ownwhere you can practice just
resting as consciousness, sothat you're deeply rested in and
calibrated for what you'reabout to bring to the lovemaking
session.
You're not bringing omega,you're bringing only alpha, only

(43:00):
alpha.
So greater the differencebetween you and your partner,
the greater the sexual charge.
So the more you're exclusivelyin alpha and the more your
partner is exclusively in omega,the hotter that sex is going to
feel.
When it's kind of a mishmashmixture, it'll feel a little
more resonant and water it down.
So what you're saying right nowis like let's bring that

(43:22):
extreme of alpha.
So the first thing would be ameditative practice where you
are practicing resting asconsciousness itself.
There's many differenttechniques we could potentially
get into, but I'm not going tospend too much time there right
now, when you're ready to nowengage sexually, what you want

(43:43):
to do is you want to begin byputting your body in what I
would call alpha body.
And what alpha body is is it's agrounded symmetrical shape.
And what is the most groundedgeometric shape?
It's a triangle small top,large, base at the bottom.

(44:05):
That is the most groundedgeometrical shape there is.
So when I sit, some people Idon't know if you could see the
way I'm sitting right now, butI'm sitting on meditation
cushions with my knees spreadout wide in a kneeling posture,
palms are open, hands are facedown on the ends of my knees and
you can just see in my body I'min the shape of a triangle.

(44:26):
So this triangle shapecommunicates to my partner
groundedness, presence,steadiness, and all of those are
the embodiment of whatconsciousness is, because
consciousness is steady, it'snot changing, it's not moving,
it's just that steadiness.
So the body's the first placethat we want to go.

(44:47):
The next piece that we want tobring place that we want to go,
the next piece that we want tobring in, is we want to bring
breath, because breath is thebridge that connects us to our
intimate partner.
And breath is cruciallyimportant, particularly for the
alpha practitioner, becauseyou're not moving like Omega.
Can you give me?

like a demo.
Like what do you mean?
Like show me, kind of likeyou're saying you're not moving
like omega.
So you give me like a demon.
Like what do you mean?
Like show me, kind of likeyou're saying you're not moving
like omega so what did?

yeah, what does that mean?
What is, what is omega?

well, it's like yeah, you're saying you're not
moving like it.
Breath is very important.
I'm wondering if you could justshow me visually oh my god yeah
, omega versus alpha kind ofembodiment, yeah, so when?

I sit down for practice and I'm
bringing alpha.
I'll be here and still, and myintimate partner will sit down
and immediately her spine issoft and moving, her hips are
moving, she'll take a breath andshe'll put her hands back,
she'll begin to separate herlegs and feet.
So her body is dynamic.
So alpha body's grounded, omegabody's dynamic and just if you

(45:54):
have one person in that stillposture and one person
dynamically moving with theirbody, you already have sexual
polarity starting.
But if you have two partnerssitting like Buddhas, you're not
going to feel sexual polarity.
You'll feel very present witheach other, but be like this
isn't sexually interesting.
The moment the one partnerstarts to drop in and move their

(46:16):
body, now you have thebeginning of the opposites that
create sexual tension so then.

So then the charge builds and then, at a
certain point though you're notjust going to be still the whole
time Exactly You're going tomove somehow.
Yes.

And that's why the breath is so
important, because the way thatyou practice alpha is the
movement really comes from yourbreath.
So it's your breath that'screating the movement for alpha
and it makes your partner feellike you're with them.
So if you were in alpha postureand you only had grounded body

(46:55):
with no breath and you were justlooking at them, it would
become awkward really quick.
Your partner would be like whyare you looking at me like that?
You know, like I can't feel youright, it would be their
complaint.
You just feel like empty.
So in sexual yoga and as alpha,we come out of our stubborn

(47:16):
consciousness and say okay, I'mgoing to offer you this breath
as an extension of myconsciousness, so you can feel
me connected to you.
And what you want to be able todo is from this position.
I always recommend startingwith, and what you want to be
able to do is from this position, I always recommend starting
with the hips.
You want to unlock your hips sothat you could do an anterior
and posterior pelvic tilt.

(47:37):
So for anyone who doesn't knowwhat that is is, you just want
to practice having your hipstilt forward by arching your
lower back slightly, and youcould even put your hands on the
sides of your hips as you dothis.
And then you want to tuck yourtailbone underneath you and
flatten your lower back slightly.
And you could even put yourhands on the sides of your hips
as you do this, and then youwant to tuck your tailbone
underneath you and flatten yourlower spine.
So the hips are just movingforward and back, arch the lower

(47:58):
back, flatten the lower back.
Now what's really important inalpha is, you notice, this is a
sagittal plane movement, meaningit's only happening forward and
back.
I'm not going side to side.
There's no figure eight,because that immediately becomes
omega.
So we're staying in thissagittal plane of forward and

(48:18):
back only.
So we're bringing this subtlemovement now, but we're not
dynamic like omega.
We're keeping symmetry andgroundedness as we bring this
slight movement.
Once the hips are unlocked, nowyou start to bring the breath.
So what you do is, as you archthe lower back, you inhale down

(48:39):
into the genitals and your bellygets big, your genitals get
full and it feels like you'realmost packing energy down to
the base of your body.
And then, as you exhale, it'slike the breath just rises up
like a vapor off of a waterfall.
So a way to visualize thispractice is on the inhale.

(49:01):
Imagine a waterfall is flowingdown and filling this reservoir
between your legs, saturatingyour genitals, and then, as you
exhale, only the mist is risingup through your heart and throat
, just sensitizing your body andreleasing any tension.
So you inhale down and then youexhale gently, because you're

(49:25):
not sending the energy back up,you just want to release the
effervescence of the exhale sothat the energy stays low in the
body again, because in alphawe're grounding down, down, down
.
So from our body and our breathalone, our partner is now going
to start to feel this heavyweighted presence that feels

(49:47):
like confidence, going to startto feel this heavy weighted
presence that feels likeconfidence and it's starting to
feel very penetrative.
In a way too, it's verycommanding just to sit and
breathe in this way, and ifyou're staying present with your
partner and you're not gettingtense as you do this, your
partner will start to feel yourpresence grow.
It's like you're becoming thesize of the room as you do this.

(50:08):
So the third step we want to addto this practice, and this is
where we become penetrative.
So now we have this groundedposture, we now have this
grounding breath.
We're exhaling up like vaporand now, as you look at your
intimate partner, you'repenetrating your partner with

(50:29):
your eyes.
You're penetrating with youreyes.
It's like you're cutting intothem or seeing into them, and
then what you do is you inhaledown into your own genitals and
then, when you exhale, youimagine sending that exhale up
between their thighs, into theirbelly, into their heart, into
their throat, up the crown oftheir head.

(50:50):
And now you have this breathcycle of breathing down into the
genitals and on the exhale,penetrating your partner from
the bottom up.
Inhale down to the genitals,exhale, penetrating your partner
from the bottom up.
Now, when you get good at this,you'll be able to synchronize

(51:11):
your breath to their body, sothe breath is in sync with what
their body's experiencing andfeeling.
Now, if you only did these threethings as the alpha partner,
which is alpha body, alphabreath and alpha sex, which is
now that penetrative quality,that penetrative quality of sex
those are the three lower scalesof sexual polarity that we

(51:35):
define in our work.
That would be all you wouldever need to do.
If you just practice that, youcould become a phenomenal alpha
sexual practitioner.
But clearly there's more thingswe can learn, we can do and we
can talk about more of those,but that's the foundation.
And then what happens fromthere is that presence becomes

(51:56):
so polarizing.
As opposed to leaning into yourpartner, you lean back and your
presence becomes so commanding,so penetrative.
You become more like gravity,where your partner can't help
but move towards you and climbon top of you and start touching
you.
And that's the energetics ofAlpha and Omega.

(52:18):
Alpha doesn't lean in, alphaleans back and is like gravity,
and Omega dynamically movestowards, climbs on top of, and
that would be the start of asacred sexual yoga practice.

Awesome, that's like a perfect segue into this
question that that somebodywanted to ask, inspired by your
work in the last episode.
So this this guy says I have aquestion for Justin is about
energetic penetration andleaning back Perfect segue.
I've heard Justin teach aboutleaning back and magnetizing the
Omega and how, when the Alphaleans in, there is sometimes

(52:57):
this repelling ick feeling tothe Omega.
Right, is there a way for Alphato penetrate and physically
pursue the Omega that does notcreate a repelling ick, pursue
the Omega that does not create arepelling ick, because Justin
has taught that the Omega isturned on when she feels the
alpha is controlling and holdingback the 800 pound gorilla.
Is there a way or time to letthat gorilla out, you know,

(53:19):
without getting the ick?
Doesn't she want that gorillato have its way with her?

Absolutely .
Let's do three techniques thatcan be used in this moment.
That, I think, would be a greatstarting point, cool.
The first technique has to dowith the breath and the
attention.
So what a lot of men might dois, as they lean back, they kind
of withdraw from her.

(53:45):
They almost imagine thatleaning back means to withdraw
from her and that's not what itmeans at all.
As you lean back physically withyour body and you inhale down
into your belly, the feeling islike your belly is getting
bigger, like your belly isgetting bigger, and every time
you inhale you could almostimagine that inhale is expanding

(54:06):
out and moving towards her andtouching her belly to belly.
So you are approaching her, butyou're like approaching her
just with your breath and yourpresence.
That's beginning to permeateher body and you're moving in
from the lower part and that'show you're creating this kind of
proximity or closeness, ofengaging or moving towards her.

(54:27):
You're doing it energeticallyfrom the base of your body and
when she feels that breathgrowing and touching her between
her thighs, that's quite theexperience because at the same
time she doesn't feel rushed,she feels she has time and space
, but she's also feeling yourdesire for her and that's the
unique combination that createsthe hottest polarity is she

(54:50):
wants to feel you in equanimity,rested back, there's no rush,
I'm not going anywhere and Iwant you.
But even as you saw me, justlean in a little bit.
As I said, I want you.
I want is the nature of thatlean in energy, but you're
disciplining yourself to leanback and I want you, and that's

(55:11):
the second way that we do this.
So the breath growing at thebase, moving towards her, is the
one.
Second is through vocal command.
So we talked about beingpenetrative.
If you observe, what makesanyone penetrative in the world,
it's their ability to speakwith a commanding tone Do this,

(55:32):
do this, do this, I want this.
So when we're uncertain, notconfident or not penetrative,
we'll be like is it okay if Ikiss you?
Do you like this when I touchyou?
Is it okay to do this?
And and that is a reaction,yeah, that's a reaction and it's

(55:56):
, it's completely understandableand reasonable, I mean I, yeah,
I, I yeah, I.

I wasn't laughing because I thought it
was dumb or anything like.
I'm just laughing because ofall the times I've done that in
life, because of such concernfor and how I didn't actually
serve the situation.
But I think it's importantbecause, like with your model of
polarity, like the, the lowertriangle I'll just put it on
screen right now, just so peoplecan see what we're talking

(56:26):
about like it's sensitivity andawareness and equanimity are
fundamental first, before youwould do anything like that and
we kind of talked about that inthe last episode, right?
So what you're saying?
This commanding consciousness?
There's already the foundationof trust there, you know, and so
, and so that's, that's thestarting point.

So, yeah, within the model, yeah, yes,
and that's absolutely correct,because if we are aware of
ourself and our partner and theimpact we're having, that's
awareness.
If we're sensitive to our ownexperience and sensitive to our
partner's experience, that'sanother skill of development to
be sensitive to their experienceand know the impact that we're
having.
What are they feeling?

(57:07):
Do you know?
Train that.
And then to have equanimity,which means non-attachment, and
that's what purifies our desirein a way that our desire is no
longer this reactive,destructive element, but now it
becomes an expression of ourlove.
So, as we're doing this, as I'mdescribing this, we're not
doing it to manipulate ourpartner or get our selfish needs

(57:27):
met.
We're doing it as an expressionof love, because that's how we
want to share our love with thisperson.
And we know when it'sappropriate to say I want you to
get over here, sit on my lap.
And we know when it'sappropriate to say I see you're
hurting right now.
I see that what I said hurtsyou and I've lost your trust.

(57:48):
Those are two different formsof communication which I detail
in our book, but having theawareness to know which is the
medicine in that moment is alarge part of sacred sex.
So, as we're bringing command,we're doing it from
consciousness, we're doing itfrom love, yeah.
So when we do bring command,it's time to bring fire, to say

(58:13):
to your partner I want you, Iwant you to crawl on my body.
That is now inviting desire and, in a way, leaning towards her,
without actually leaningtowards her.
So you're expressing yourdesire for her, your want, but
you don't need her to do any ofthat.

(58:34):
You can rest back here forever,you're not going anywhere.
You love her and you burn forher, but there's no reaction,
and that drives her sexuallycrazy.
That's what every woman wantsto feel in our partner is I want
you to desire me and I want youto just rest back forever and
give me all the space and timethat I need, and it's such a
rare thing in an experience.

(58:55):
They don't even know it'spossible, but once they feel it
they go holy crap, this isamazing.
So that's what she wants.
So you become very penetrativein your commanding voice.
So alpha voice is commandingand you can play with this.
You could say either I want, Iwant to pin you down, I want to

(59:18):
taste you.
I want you to crawl over hereright now.
But if you want to make it evenmore penetrative than that,
just get rid of.
I want you to crawl over hereright now.
But if you want to make it evenmore penetrative than that,
just get rid of.
I won't Lay down.
Get over here Right now.
Suddenly it's.
So.
This is how we develop thatconfidence in sexuality without
actually having to lean in orkind of cause harm.

(59:41):
We're doing this all atincredibly safe distance.
And what's amazing about thesafe distance is it actually
makes it hotter.
It actually makes it way sexierthan if you were to just lean
in and grab her breasts or grabher hips.

Yeah, so when does the gorilla happen?

Justin Patrick Pierce (01:00:00):
Yeah, Everyone's excited for the
gorilla gorilla, right.
So now you've got this sexualcharge happening.
If you're already at this pointand she's opening, she's
showing signs like this isamazing.
And she starts to come towardsyou now she's putting her hands
on your thighs, she's leaning into kind of like put her lips

(01:00:24):
against your neck.
She's showing signs of interest.
I want proximity from you.
That's the sign.
Clearly she's moving in in thismoment of leaning.
In that she does, you can startto bring some of that gorilla
out, but you're doing itconsciously, with your breath.
So take a breath in, out, butyou're doing it consciously with

(01:00:46):
your breath.
So take a breath in, lean in alittle bit and get close to her
and see what she does.
If she immediately pulls away,you pull away.
You're not in any rush.
If she suddenly comes moretowards, you run your hand up
her spine and pull her right in.
So now, at this moment, you'redancing with that energy.
What's really important for menis that any moment of you

(01:01:09):
leaning at it all is going tocreate an experience in her body
and she's going to feelsomatically.
She's not even going to thinkabout this.
The experience she's going toget is either yes, I'm ready for
this, or oh no, that was toomuch, too fast.
I didn't want it to speed upthat much.
Most of the time, men, it'sgoing to be the latter where she
didn't want you to speed upthat much.

(01:01:29):
So you're testing the water.
She puts her thighs around yourhips and then you just slowly
begin to bring your hands, as ifyou're going to touch her
thighs and before you even makecontact, see her body.
Is she opening or closing?
Do you see her body yearning tobe touched or is she starting
to stop move and stop breathing?

(01:01:50):
So, before you even touch herthighs, bring your hands back
and rest back and keep breathing.
So you're now dancing with herbody, you're bringing that
gorilla out, but in small doses.
Because what happens with menis that now that if you feel the
energy build, you want to leanin, you want contact, and what
they do is they'll lean in andthey'll go past the point where

(01:02:14):
now they're in full contact,she's closing, she's no longer
turned on and they just keepgoing.
And then, by the time herealizes that the sexual
polarity is gone and she's notinterested, he's like what
happened?
I don't know the moment Imissed so.
So much of sacred sexualpractice is about learning that
moment where you bring thegorilla out, you bring contact.

(01:02:36):
Is she opening or closing?
Is she opening?
And if she's opening, if she'syes, if she's yes, keep bringing
it and then you can get on topof her.
You could take her wrists andpin her down right, you could
get full in, you put your lipsagainst her neck and then she's
like ah.
And then, when she wants it themost, you slowly pull back and
come back to breathing and shegoes no, where are you?

(01:02:58):
And you tease her.
So it becomes this playfulexpression of unleashing that
gorilla, but in a very artfulway, where the secret to that is
only bring enough to watch herresponse.
The moment you see her start toclose, you create space again.
Then you come back in and therewill be a moment where you can

(01:03:18):
just break through, becauseevery time you come close and
pull away it creates more sexualtension, to the point where she
just wants to burst.
And I think that's what we allwant to feel in our sexing.
We want to feel our partnerhungry for us and bursting.
So we have to know how tocreate that experience for them.

Taylor Johnson (01:03:35):
Yeah, and those moments when we're on top of
them and grabbing them andbringing that.
That's when the presence andthe devotion piece from you know
well, it comes in everywhere,but like that's especially
important there too, absolutelyTo not get lost in the oh my God
, I feel so good.
I don't know, but like, no, I'mlike presence devoted in this
connection, attuned, aware,sensitive, the whole thing.

That's exactly it.
Because, particularly as men,when our genitals get very
stimulated if you observeyourself, let's say,
masturbating, coming close toorgasm, as you approach orgasm,
your shoulders round forward,your breath gets shallow, you
get tense in your body.
So this is why we train insexual yoga to open the front

(01:04:28):
surface of the body and breatheall the way down to the genitals
, because when you start toapproach climax, you're still
opening your body and breathingdown to the genitals, and this
is what allows you not only tohave better sex, but to also
slow down orgasm, so you're notejaculating too quickly.
And this is how you prolonglovemaking using these skills.

Yeah, and so we haven't explicitly said how to
do this in a self-pleasure, selfsolo sex cultivation thing, but
you could fit the piecestogether if you've been
listening right.
So if somebody is listening andthey don't have a partner and
they want to cultivate thisother style of sexual energetics
, you could sit there, you know,make a tall posture with your

(01:05:07):
body and breathe in this way,rocking your hips back and forth
, and keep a very attunedpresence and cultivated,
expanded awareness while youbring sexual pleasure to you and
just practice being in thatspace.

Justin Patrick Pierc (01:05:20):
Absolutely A very simple practice you
could do with box breathing isjust sit in this posture that
I've described, using thatpelvic rock, but inhale down
into your genitals for a fourcount, hold in your genitals for
a four count, exhale up for afour count and then hold in the
crown for a four count andyou're just feeling.

(01:05:43):
What you're doing is you'repracticing feeling sensation
between your crown and your root.
It's like you could feel theinside of your body.
And as you do this practice,it's not necessary to feel some
kind of magic sensation orvisualize anything.
The best practice is to justactually notice what you can
feel and whatever you feel isfine.
You don't have to feel anythingextraordinary, just feel

(01:06:05):
whatever you can feel.
As you breathe down, as youhold in the base of your body,
as you exhale up, you're justfeeling and it starts to
sensitize the central channel ofyour body which, with enough
practice, opens up thepossibility for multiple orgasm
and running orgasm through yourbody, and it has to do with the

(01:06:26):
ability for you to sensitizethese subtle areas in your
nervous system.

Yeah, yeah, and that's so worth it.

It's so worth it to do that.

So we're coming up here to the end of our time,
but there's one more piece I'dlove to bring in so that we can
close with, and it fitsperfectly with what we've just
been talking about.
And it was a big aha moment forNaima and I when we came to
your workshop.
It was very cool.
It was a small enough workshopthat we had an opportunity to go
up in front of the group and bea demo and get into a scenario

(01:06:58):
which we've encountered troublein our own intimacy, you know,
and trouble meaning likesomething happens and the desire
fades right.
And so what has happened for usin the past that we're now very
cognizant of thanks to thesepractices is that if one of us
was going down on oral sex tothe other person either her or I

(01:07:19):
say I'm receiving this right.
I might have the tendency tojust like, oh, just totally lay
back and relax and and and beserviced Right, but
unconsciously right Like we.
That wasn't the agreement, thatwasn't the arrangement, and so
I sort of there's almost like adetachment that I would go into

(01:07:39):
or she would go into thissometimes and what that?
What ended up being catalyzedfrom that is, whoever was giving
the oral sex would feel likewhere is my partner?
What's happening with her?
What's happening with him?
I'm not feeling him, he's justreceiving.
And so when we got up in frontof people, you noticed that and

(01:07:59):
we sort of acted it out withouttouching genitals.
But there was the inquiry aroundwell, if you're receiving, like
you have to complete thecircuit.
You know you have to keep theenergy flowing internally.
And so there was.
You advised me I was the demolaying down in that moment to
start moving my hips andbreathing in a certain way that
was generative, that would allowme to experience more pleasure,

(01:08:22):
but that would also demonstrateto her that I was still with
her in those moments andimmediately, like that, switched
something for her where she wasmore turned on and this circuit
of arousal was happening.
And that was such a key pieceto be aware of for us and then
to bring in and to be mindful ofthroughout the whole sexual

(01:08:44):
experience for everybody.
Like there is a circuithappening and I heard you allude
to it in a number of differentways when you were speaking, but
I wanted to just speak directlyto it and see what you might
want to add or say about it well, I think you've described it
perfectly.

I mean, that is the teaching, and when
we're participating in any kindof sex acts with our intimate
partner is that breath iscrucial because it completes the
circuit between our two bodies.
The moment we kind of stretchand check out and just, we no
longer feel present, right, andeven if in our minds we are
present, our partner doesn'tfeel our presence and that's why

(01:09:21):
, by bringing it through ourbreath, through our hips, they
feel wow, my partner's with me.
Now, when you take thatunderstanding it, let's say,
next time you go get a massage,you bring that to the massage
parlor.
Your massage is going to besignificantly better because the
masseuse is going to feel youactually receiving and working
with the body.
And anytime I I know people whopractice this or I myself I go

(01:09:44):
to masseuse they're always likeit's so wonderful to work on
your body because your body's soresponsive, it's I'm not just
working on a corpse here yeah sowhen you bring that sexually,
it's transformative for yourpartner and the experience that
both of you can have.
And one, one of the key thingswe are learning in this practice
is this breath, thisregenerative breath of

(01:10:06):
conductivity.
It could be called where we'recompleting the circuitry.
We're completing the circuitand so when we're practicing the
sexual yoga is one thing weoften want to do is inhale down
and exhale up and back up thespine.
Inhale down and exhale back up,because when we ejacaculate,
which is a degenerative act,it's a release.

(01:10:27):
It feels good because werelease and we go, ah.
But you feel depletedafterwards.
Why is that?
Because you've released theenergy as opposed to recycled it
.
So normally the energy wants togo down and out, down and out,
so you're losing life force,energy and the older we get, the
more obvious that becomes,particularly as men.
So what you're training to dois to inhale down and then learn

(01:10:50):
how to exhale that energy backup through your system.
And when you practice thisrightly, you'll feel you have
more energy, you have more focus, you have more discipline, more
clarity to bring to yourpurpose and your relationship.
It's an incredible experience,and start to ejaculating just
isn't as rewarding as it oncewas when you were just using it

(01:11:11):
as a form of release.
There's something so much morerewarding about keeping that
energy.
It's better than three cups ofcoffee every day just to have
that in you.
It's an incredible form ofpotency.
So, in the two body practiceand all of these practices that
we teach, this conductivity iscreating now the infinity loop
between you and your intimatepartner inhaling together,

(01:11:34):
exhaling together, inhalingtogether, exhaling together.
Through every element ofpractice and that's what has you
both your bodies begin toconverge at a depth that's
beyond just the physical.
It becomes emotional, itbecomes subtle body, it becomes
spirit to spirit.
And finding that onenessthrough all layers of your

(01:11:55):
experience is the point of thispractice.
Until the two bodies dissolveas one, yeah, yeah, I love that.

And when you were speaking just a moment ago,
you hit the nail on the headfor what was happening to us.
It wasn't necessarily that wewere checking out of the
experience, like we were verypresent in the experience, but
we weren't, uh, demonstratingthat we were present in the
experience, you know.
And so the circuit wasn'tcomplete and so it would fade
and fizzle and we would wonder,like what's going on?

(01:12:24):
What, what happened?
You know I love that.
I love that piece and you'vementioned a couple of times.
I don't think you actually saidit exactly in this interview,
but the first one you did, yousaid breathe your partner almost
as a verb.
You know to breathe yourpartner as a verb and I think
that fits in perfectly and Ijust want to name it.
That's kind of what you meant.

(01:12:45):
You know it's like yes you.

you first learn to breathe yourself, then
you learn to breathe yourpartner, and then you learn to
breathe the world, as thephenomenal world arises and what
you see, what you think in theobjects of life itself.
You develop an intimacy andrelationship with life itself
where you, as consciousness, arefully participating in this

(01:13:14):
phenomenal world of beauty, ofsensation, of tragedy, of
suffering.
The whole gamut of experienceis here and we can choose to
either suffer that or we canlearn to make love to it, and
this path is about learning thelatter yeah, beautiful, let's
all take a breath to that.

Yeah, that's a perfect place to close.
Justin, thank you so much forpart two of this conversation.
Thank you so much for your work.
We'll put links to everythingyour book, your website in the
description of this episode andany other last words you'd like
to share before we close.

No, I'm just honored to be part of this.
Thank you so much for having meback.
I've really enjoyed both of ourconversations and I hope people
get value out of it Totally.

Yeah, thank you and thank you, listener, or if
you're watching this on YouTubeand I'd love to hear your
thoughts about this, and if youhave any questions, to leave
those in the YouTube commentsection.
Thank you so much.
Thank you again, justin.
I hope you all have a beautiful, beautiful rest of your day.
I'll see you next time.

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Alpha Sexuality & Men's Sexual Practice - with Justin Patrick Pierce (Pt. 2)

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Alpha Sexuality & Men's Sexual Practice - with Justin Patrick Pierce (Pt. 2)