March 11, 2025 • 29 mins
This episode dives into why dogs steal and offers practical solutions for dog owners struggling with this common behaviour. With insights on environmental management, training strategies, and understanding canine instincts, listeners can gain valuable knowledge to curb stealing.
• Exploration of the instinctual reasons behind stealing
• The importance of calm reactions instead of confrontation
• Tips on swapping items to minimise stealing
• Managing spaces to prevent theft before it occurs
• The role of boundaries and crates in fostering good behaviour
• Building a positive environment for dogs to relax and thrive
• Encouragement to seek out training resources for persistent stealing behaviour
Check out our 10 Days to Stop Stealing Course at:
https://absolutedogs.me/stopstealing
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lauren Langman (00:09):
Welcome to the Absolute Dog Sex in a Squirrel
podcast.
I'm Lauren Langman.
I'm one of the world's leadingdog trainers and it's my mission
to help owners become theirdog's top priority.
In each episode, you'lldiscover how to gain trust and
communicate with your dog likenever before, creating
unbreakable bonds that make youthe most exciting part of their
world.
Hello and welcome to theSexiness Girl podcast, the
(00:31):
podcast that gives you real-lifedog training and sometimes
human training results too.
Now, today I'm joined by thewonderful Sam Sam.
We're talking stealing.
Tell me why stealing has been aproblem in your life, and that
sounds kind of ominous, right itdoes.
Sam Askew (00:48):
You're making me sound like I'm the thief here.
No, no, no, it's.
It's my dog.
I swear it's my dog.
It's not me, although if you'veever watched Supertrainer Live,
I actually do steal on there afew times, so it could be about
me.
Anyway, uh, stealing with ourdogs can be a real problem,
right, it can be painful in alot of ways and, uh, it can
(01:09):
definitely be frustrating andsometimes it can be really
dangerous.
You know, we've we've had dogsat the center that have, um, you
know, wanted to swallow socksand then it gets into their
intestines and then it's a vetvisit and it's very expensive
and you know it can.
It can be so many differentproblems and I've actually
experienced this myself.
Um, one of my dogs actuallyboth my dogs, really to some
(01:30):
extent, but particularly one ofthem um, will just steal
anything.
I mean literally anything.
She'll take it out of therubber, she gets in a bin she's
a tiny little Jack Russellterrier and somehow she manages
to get into our bin, which is atleast twice the height of her.
I don't know how she does it.
Still, she just gets in there.
But she will grab anything inthere and she will, if she can
eat it.
She will eat it, you know shewill shred it and she will
(01:50):
ingest it.
So these sorts of things.
You know you kind of want toget a handle on it.
Um, I also kind of got to thisbit where you're trying to,
you're like I need to get it offthem and you're trying to get
it off them and then it evolvesinto like they're growling at
you and you know it's just thiswhole big, huge mess.
So it can be really, reallypainful, really painful and
(02:11):
stealing can be a massive issue,can't it?
Lauren Langman (02:14):
when it comes to ?
You know what the dogs, whenthey start to clamp and hold and
I'm thinking my dog skittle shedoesn't really steal anything
in the house so much, but shereally really will get hold of
like a mouse, a rabbit, uh, anobject, and like the red mist
comes down and like her eyes aregone and like you try and go
into a jaw.
And she's only a little cutespaniel.
She's seven kilos, like we'renot talking like some big
(02:36):
mastiff or or bull terrier here.
We're talking like a seven kilo, fluffy spaniel, but the clamp
on the jaw is pretty impressive.
And and you actually need tohave dog training, not a strong
hand when it comes to this, andI think there's so many people
that think that a strong handwill do it.
And I think historically in dogtraining, I mean, certainly my
dad would have resorted topunishment or some form of
(02:58):
aversive to get that thing back,or would have shouted or got
angry or all of the above.
And I've grown up in adifferent world.
I've grown up very much in thepositive reinforcement sort of
karen prior sort of world andera and um and and the late
karen prior, which is isincredible because she was such
a huge influence on my, mypositive reinforcement and
understanding of quadrants andhow dogs learn, for me actually
(03:19):
understanding that there is nopoint me fighting a dog when
they're in that space andactually we need to train better
.
Now I know you're exactlyaligned here and we're in
alignment.
What would you say when it comesto stealing?
What are some of your top tips,some of your suggestions?
Now, I know you've got,obviously, the Stop Stealing
badge that people might not haveseen the 10 days to stop
stealing just £27, which isincredible value.
(03:42):
But what are some of the thingsyou cover when you're there?
And if you haven't already seenthat, one head to
absolute-dogscom.
Yeah, I think it's that.
So check out the Stop Stealingbadge because it's £27, lifetime
access.
But, sam, what do you cover whenwe're talking Stop Stealing?
And what tips can we give topeople that maybe haven't got
the badge or don't have thecapacity to purchase a badge?
And capacity to purchase abadge, um, and?
And what can, what can we helpthem with?
(04:03):
Because I know that stealing isa massive issue?
And when you said about vetfees, I think that fees, for
sure, but I also know one of mycustomers, their dog did it
enough times.
The dog needed putting to sleepand that was horrific.
It was a three-year-old spaniel.
Three-year-old basically grab.
This dog would grab stones andthe last time they operated on
him, his, his, um intestine waswas just basically was screwed.
It was not going to allow anymore um operations to be had on
(04:26):
it and so that dog was put sleepcase, which is really horrific
for a seven-year-old, right.
So this is a baby.
Sorry, a three-year-old is ababy.
Sam Askew (04:34):
Um, yeah, that was it very early on in life three or
four intestine ops and and it'sdone.
Lauren Langman (04:38):
So, yeah, what are your tips for stop stealing?
I know you've done the badge, Iknow there is um access to a
course out there for people thatwant it, but what are your tips
?
What can you share and I'mhappy to jump in with you oh, I
think so.
Sam Askew (04:49):
The very first thing is to say that it's.
You know, it's such a normalbehavior.
You know, don't, don't getfreaked out like that.
Your dog is doing this reallyhorrible, naughty thing.
They are just driven by likepure desire.
You know they're seeking outpleasure and they're avoiding
pain, right.
So we're, we're kind of lookingat that and going, okay,
they're just doing somethingthat they're finding pleasure in
.
Okay, we don't want to, wedon't want to go crazy and try
(05:12):
and grab.
That's the first thing I wouldsay is don't just try and grab
the thing off your dog, becauseoften what I find with that is
then you've got a dog that wantsit more, you've created an
event out of that, you've madeit a big deal, you've made that,
um, that object even moredesirable to them.
So the first thing is don'tdon't grab it, don't try and get
it off them, becausepotentially you're actually just
(05:33):
making that worse and makingthat behavior much more um, much
more kind of like ingrainedwithin your dog.
Um, the thing I would thinkabout doing is can we swap it?
It it sounds so simple, butwhat do they love in their lives
that they're going to want togive that up to.
You know, if I had somebroccoli and someone said, would
(05:54):
you like some cake?
Yeah, absolutely, let's swapright this second.
So if we think about that withour dogs, you know you've got a
sock.
Well, how about some tasty meat?
Or how about your mostfavourite toy?
Or how about another sock?
And we have a bit of a playwith some socks, you know, and
we can actually create like agame out of this and make it so
that this is something that'sreally easy to let our dogs to
(06:17):
let go for us.
Lauren Langman (06:20):
What would be your first tip?
Yeah, I mean, swapping is hugefor me and I think the biggest
thing is not making, like yousaid, an event out of it, but
also trying to be reallydisinterested in the object,
like that dead rabbit that youare trying to find
scrumdiddlyumptious right now.
You know what.
It is so dull, it is so boring,whereas most people are like
squealing about it or like mydog, like this is, this is
(06:43):
skittles, for those of you thatdon't know skittles, and they're
skittles.
Uh, she's on her bed eating achew, having a lovely time of it
.
As soon as you start to payloads of attention to that chew,
I'm not going to do it becauseI don't think that's
particularly fair on her.
And she is.
She's not guardy, but I thinkyou could make her guardy, um,
because she's quite possessive.
So she's possessive but notguardy.
So if you go to pull it off her, she'll possess it, but she's
not growly or or mean or snarly,but I think you could make her
(07:06):
that way, because a dog that'sgot like that natural possession
, I think those are the dogsthat you can.
You can sort of instigate it in, and in some sports you'll try
to like in in schutzen that'soften or like police work.
That's how you often get themto bark in front of something
because they're possessing, andso I think for me, one of my
biggest tips would be for theowner to find that object so
(07:26):
dull and sometimes that objectis your wedding ring or that is
your remote control, or like Iwatch the people where the chimp
comes out in them, like that,like mode and and it's like no,
you need to be the adult hereand you need to just be like I'm
so not interested in whatyou're doing.
I'm seriously not interested inwhat you've got, like it really
does not interest me.
And it's the same as whenpeople put bait in front of you,
(07:48):
like I know someone might putsomething in front of your
social media and they want youto bite on it, and you're like
I'm not biting on that, oryou'll hear it in like office
politics or like um staffrelationships, or, and someone
wants you to bite, they're aninstigator, a kid at school or
whatever.
There's an inst get, don't beinstinct, don't, don't, don't be
drawn to those.
And so for me, yeah, makingmaking my own a really neutral,
(08:08):
really like boring, notinterested in the dead rabbit, I
mean skills, had a, had aheadless rabbit on easter sunday
, which felt reallyinappropriate.
It was like her version of ahorror story.
And um, and she recently had amouse and all we could see was
its tail like out the end of hermouth and it was like moving
tail thing and like.
Those sorts of situations arejust horrible and you want to
(08:28):
squeal right, you want to squeal.
The worst thing you can do issqueal and, like you said, trade
yeah, and it's hard to tradewhen it's like that because
that's such a precious object.
So it's like it's like um thehobbit and my precious, my
precious, and you can just seeher like my precious and her
eyes are popping out of her headand she's red and I love what
you said.
It's really natural behavior.
This is a really natural thing.
(08:50):
This is not a dog who.
It's abnormal behavior.
This is a dog that you'reworking with.
We're so lucky we're workingwith a present like being that
is showing you all of itsnatural instincts and prey
methods and all of the thingsthey do.
But I think, like my mum justcooked up a load of steak we had
steak that was like on the dayit should be used.
Mum said do you want anythingtonight?
I said I'm really not up forthat tonight, and so I said I'll
(09:12):
just just cook it all up forthe dogs.
And so she's cooked it all upthe dogs.
We'll use it as treats.
That's the sort of thing thatwould be a great high value
scatter, whereas I don't thinkskittle would let go of a dead
rabbit for a piece of kibble.
She'd be like it's a bad dealand she definitely wouldn't for
the person who pretends to do itwhat's this, what's this,
what's this?
And then doesn't give it to her.
So, and a lot of people havejust got a record deal.
They're offering like fivepence an hour.
(09:32):
Let's not offer five pence anhour, let's offer like a hundred
of steak here.
And people that worry that theyare giving the dog what they
wanted.
No, the dog didn't grab thething to do that.
Actually, the dog is alreadywanting to grab things.
This is a dog who has that inthem to do.
(09:53):
What you need to do is managethe spaces better and not find
yourself drawn into bigdiscussions and arguments with
that dog, because you won't winand you don't ever want to beat
it out of them.
Sam Askew (10:08):
And there are people out there who would like to.
So, yeah, I've said more thanmy turn.
You go, sam.
Um, I think you actually justtouched on it there.
I think setting up space, sothinking about, um, my dog
getting in the bin, would be agreat example.
Okay, she keeps getting in thebin, it keeps happening.
Okay, well, hang on a minute,rather than me fighting against,
trying to, you know, constantly, stop her from doing that.
Actually, how about I get adifferent bin?
How about I get a bin that'sgot a lid that she can't open?
(10:31):
You know, how about?
I'd say, get a taller bin, butthat doesn't seem to work?
Uh, just a bin that the liddoesn't open?
Yeah, let's not put food on theside at a dog's height where
they're going to grab it,because, realistically speaking,
you're putting them in aposition where they're you,
really you're setting them up tofail.
Yeah, let's not set them up tofail because, realistically
speaking, then they're not.
They don't think in the sameway that we do in terms of like,
(10:53):
should I, shouldn't I?
They're looking at somethingthat they have desire for and
they want to get it, and so, ifthey can, yeah, they might.
You know, and then you've gotthis reinforcement behavior
where it's been.
It's exciting, it's happened afew times.
They've got a really cool winout of it.
It becomes an even bigger deal,an even better deal, and
they're more likely to do itagain and again.
So if we can actually just setthe space up cleverly so they're
(11:17):
less likely to do it in thefirst place, you know, then
we're in for a winner becausewe're not even starting that
behavior in the first place.
You know, that would be.
That would be my top tip forsomebody that hasn't got this
behavior in place already, thathasn't got a dog that already
loves stealing.
However, if you've got a dogthat already loves stealing, I
(11:37):
think my other one would belet's think about um, let's
think about teaching your doglike a bit of a retrieve, and
let's think about having ourdogs be able to bring us things.
You know, maybe that's bringingit to their beds, or maybe it's
bringing it to their crate, ormaybe it's bringing it to your
hand.
It doesn't have to be a superfancy, formal retrieve, it
doesn't have to be perfect.
Can they just bring it to youand pop it on the ground in
(11:58):
front of you, or maybe swap itout for that thing that you've
got.
You've played that game, soyou've got two tips there really
nice.
Lauren Langman (12:04):
Two tips really really nice.
And I think, going back to thatbin and that setup and I'll
give you an example, mine's aslightly different one but I've
got a toy bin in the arena andit's like a laundry bin full of
toys.
So this laundry bill bin isabsolutely chocker, rammed like
topped up with toys and toys andtoys and toys.
And I was getting reallyfrustrated because in most of my
training sessions skit wouldrun, dive in it and grab
(12:26):
something out.
And I mean this is like a tallbin, it's like this high, and
she'd land in it.
And I've got some funny videoson the absolute dogs page where
she's doing this and she'sliterally running, landing in,
rummaging and it would be reallyannoying.
It's often like partway througha session she'd just leg it and
run off.
And then one day I thought whyhave I got the toy bin in the
middle of the arena?
Like why have I not put the toybin outside of the arena,
outside of the gate, on top of atable?
(12:47):
And since I put it outside ofthe arena, outside of the gate,
on top of the table, she doesn'tdo it.
But it's because you'veinterrupted the practicing of
that behavior.
So no, she's not to practice itand no, you're not allowing her
to practice it.
And I think that's really,really important, that you're
not giving them the need topractice it.
I think that's that's reallykey, because if you allow that
(13:09):
thing to be reinforced again andagain, and again and again, or
practiced again and again, andagain and again, of course it
will build.
So what they rehearse theybecome.
And sometimes the other thingis you find it funny like I
found it really funny that shewas running the object.
Like I found it really cute aswell.
I was like, oh my god, she's sodamn cute, like she's really
cute when she's doing it, and soI think there's a level of you
(13:32):
kind of find it funny until it'sa problem.
And it's the same with thepuppy like they're quite cute.
Like she decided she became theAndrex puppy the other day and
decided to grab a toilet rolland was like fluffing it all
around the room and I was likeha ha ha, oh, no, ha ha ha, no,
no, no, actually this is not haha ha, like it's funny for like
a second.
And then you're like no,actually this really isn't funny
because there's fluffeverywhere.
So I think that's reallyimportant to acknowledge.
So yeah, those are just acouple of mine.
Sam Askew (13:54):
I remember, um, I remember when I first got, uh,
when we first got our dog Lou.
You know who's our oldest dog?
Um, she's not like, she'snearly nine now, which is
absolutely insane.
Um, but she it's.
That is crazy, isn't it?
You sort of go wow, that's nineyears, that's like a puppy
she's like, she's like blink,like a puppy she does.
She, yeah, she doesn't.
She does not look likeeverybody's, like nine, no way
(14:16):
she's such a such a little puppy.
Um, we took her to um, to mywife's family for, uh, I don't
know, it was like a barbecue orsomething like that.
Um, and we're all sat around,we're all eating, we all eat,
you know, sat eating in theliving room on our laps with our
plates.
Now, bear in mind, at thispoint she was a young dog,
really, you know, quite a youngpuppy, um, big enough that she'd
started to, you know, be ableto, like, jump a little bit and
(14:38):
and get up, trying to get up onpeople's laps, and that kind of
stuff.
And we didn't know what I know.
Now, you know, I I didn't knowabout um, about absolute dogs,
um, and this sort of way oftraining or anything like that.
It was kind of just afree-for-all, just like your dog
, would you know?
They just they get on with it,don't they do what they like um,
so everybody sat around and mybrother-in-law, who is probably
the person that that likes dogsthe least in the entire family,
(15:00):
um, he sits down with his bigplate, like like a plowman's,
and there's a massive lump ofcheese on the edge of the plate
and my dog goes up, of course,and just yoinks that cheese and
runs off and scoffers all of it.
And it was hilarious.
It was embarrassing as well,but it was very, very funny.
But I look at that sink likewhat?
What a terrible setup.
(15:21):
You know, I let a small youngpuppy just have free roam while
people had food on their laps.
You know that really.
I mean what?
What did I expect?
How could I expect anythingelse in that situation?
That would be like, um, puttingsweets out on a table and
letting a toddler come in andmake a better choice.
You know that's, they're justnot.
They haven't got that mentalcapacity at that age to make
(15:44):
good choices.
So we kind of have to guidethem a little bit.
We need to help them out.
Um, I, but I can't.
That story just always makes megiggle because she still loves
cheese.
She gets a little quiver mouthto cheese it is.
Lauren Langman (15:57):
It is so true, though, isn't it like?
What responsibility are wegiving them?
And I was.
This is an interesting one, andyou'll know what I think about
this.
So we've got a massive dogtraining arena, and there's some
students that want to hire thedog train arena, and the dogs
aren't yet off lead, and it'sjust such a big responsibility
to put on that dog and thatowner so early on, when they
(16:19):
don't even know what they'relooking for at this stage, and I
think that's really importantto acknowledge.
Um and so um, whilst we're very,very happy to hire the arena,
actually are the handler and dogable to handle that
responsibility, which is how tohandle the equipment, how to
handle the dog and how to handlethe fact they don't want the
dog to go to the toilet?
All of those kind of thingslike they're all really really,
really important in the setupthat is handling in an arena,
(16:44):
and so I think that's, I thinkthat's quite key to acknowledge
and key to um understand.
To be honest, I also think andthis is a really interesting one
that the amount ofresponsibility we do give
puppies and young dogs and andyoung adults and adolescents and
everything else, I thinkthere's a lot of responsibility
we put on them, like a massiveamount of responsibility we put
on them and yeah, so often weexpect a lot of them, don't we?
(17:06):
so often completely unwarranted,like we haven't got any
evidence that they're ready forthat responsibility.
Another example I'll give youum, we've got, uh, two
staircases.
One of the staircases in thehouse is carpeted and suitable
for dogs and the other one is,um, really polished wood and
glass.
And the other day skittles gotaccess to the polished wooden
glass and she was likescooby-doo and went smack into
the bottom of the glass at thebottom and it was horrific and I
(17:28):
was like why on earth did wegive her access to that room?
There's me thinking that she'sgot the like sense not to go on
those because she's never beenon those.
But when she was went lookingfor us, she decided that was
appropriate and she's not ableto sort of.
They're not for dogs.
The other staircase is for dogsand so it's those types of
things like have you given them?
Do they really understand theboundaries?
Do they really understand likeI could leave the room and leave
(17:50):
food on the table with braveand she would leave it alone?
She can handle thatresponsibility.
There is no chance I would dothat with skittle, and what you
need to know is which and Iwould.
It's a sort of what I'd like tovideo it.
You look, walk out the room andyou tell them, leave that alone
.
And you just walk out the roomand and I can see venture
looking out of the room and thengoing, I'm having it and
whereas you can see brave justlooking around like not allowed
(18:10):
this, not allowed this, notallowed this, like I'm watching
her right now.
She's considering what she cansteal over there.
She's thinking about what sortof rope she can pull up, because
she's she's got her head rightdown it.
She's bored of her chew andshe's now considering like, what
can she grab?
So she's grabbed a piece ofpaper by the looks of it, and
she's thinking about whether shecan pull those over.
She's got a nice chew here, butshe's considering what else is
on offer, and that is what'swhat's done.
(18:31):
I think that's probably anotherone to add in, though.
Here isn't there boundaries, andI think boundaries are really
helpful for setting your dog upif you're in games club as part
of games club.
If you're not in games club, goand check out absolute dog
store, absolute dash dogscom andon on the games um club, um
sort of community.
There are thousands of games,but one of my favorite badges is
(18:53):
the real life boundaries badgeand I just love using boundaries
and so I know you talked aboutboundaries in your in your
stealing course, but, um, itsounds like we've got
professional stealing course.
It's actually hilarious.
Um, but in your stealing courseyou do talk about boundaries
and the use of boundaries andsetups and management and how
you manage.
But, yeah, boundaries would bekey to me.
How about you, sam?
Sam Askew (19:15):
yeah, I think, I think boundaries are huge.
I also um, I've also trained acrate, so I mean, it is another
form of a boundary, essentially,and it just happens to be a
door there.
You know, um, and we train thatvery similarly, actually, and
really we're looking at um,sometimes you need a bit more
containment and again it comesdown to responsibility of the
dog.
Can they handle it, them beingon a boundary which is actually
(19:35):
quite an open space, and theyhave an element of of having to
make a choice to stay on it,whereas crate, you've got a
little bit more control overthat.
It's still a positive space.
It's still, you know, a reallyhappy space for your dog to be
in, but it also actuallysometimes just gives them a
breather, it gives them a um, itgives them a break from all of
the huge amounts of choices thatthey have to make, helps you
(19:56):
prevent the rehearsal of all ofthat.
And that's probably the keything.
And something that we do coverin the badge is to think about,
um, the differences between dogsthat have already rehearsed
this behavior and dogs thathaven't, because sometimes how
you would approach that is very,very different.
You know a dog that hasn'trehearsed any of those behaviors
you've got.
You've got a good foundationthere to sort of go okay, let's
(20:18):
set it up right, let's let'smake help, help them make the
right choices.
You know, and you can play someof these games, but you
probably might never need themthat's what you would hope
whereas maybe a dog that hasrehearsed that behavior got some
ingrained love of stealingright.
You've got a dog that wants togo and steal this stuff for
whatever reason.
They find it rewarding.
You might never know why, butthey find it really exciting and
(20:40):
they really love it.
So we look a little bit moreinto some of the strategies that
you would then do to try andchange the picture.
You know, change it up, make itlook different for your dog,
make it look different in theway that they handle it, in the
way that you handle it, the waythat you manage that situation,
which is kind of the key thing.
Lauren Langman (20:56):
Crates is a huge one for me, for that for sure
and in terms of crates, sam, Imean I use crates, gates, stairs
, sort of situations, pens, likewhatever I need to I have 10
dogs, so I have.
I have lots of different likescenarios.
I might need to use them for um, but but crates for me.
I really like my dogs to bevery relaxed in the crate and
it's not their event and it'snot their business and if I have
(21:17):
got guests I'd ask them toleave the crate alone.
Skittles is brilliant withcrates.
Like people don't know thatshe's in in the house when they
come in and I kind of like that,because then she's not like
entertainment for them, if thatmakes sense.
But um, would you?
Would you say your dogs arenice and relaxing crates.
Is that something you'vetrained and worked on and is
that something you have to build?
Because I know that for me,that is that's fundamental in
(21:38):
bringing home a new dog yeah,absolutely.
Sam Askew (21:42):
We're certainly not just sort of popping them in
there and leaving them to it.
It's.
It is something that we'vegrown to be a positive place and
then, on top of that, we'vegrown it to be a really calm
place.
You know, um to be literally aplace of relaxation and calm,
and this is none of yourbusiness anymore and it's time
to just chill out.
And sometimes you know our dogsand this is good for the
stealing thing really, in termsof we talk about a dog's bucket
(22:05):
and sometimes their buckets.
You know they can get a reallyfull bucket.
It's like it basically.
Uh, the amount of stress thatgoes into a dog's personality,
right, or a day and you thinkabout yourself, you have, um,
you start off your day great,you've had your wheat a bit, so
whatever it is that you have forbreakfast, uh, you go through
your day, but then added stressgets.
It gets it starts to top you up, starts to get higher and
(22:27):
higher and then eventually,because you've not had a break,
you've not managed to stress, ifyou've not kind of given
yourself a bit of respite, itboils over and you're shouting
at a co-staff or, um, I don'tknow, you're throwing your pen
at a wall, whatever.
Whatever you do, essentiallyyour bucket overflows because
it's just too much.
Now, sometimes our dogs getthat as well.
(22:47):
They've had too much in a day.
It could be good stuff, youknow, they could have had a
really long walk, they couldhave like met some new people,
they could have had I don't knowsome like really yummy fun
games with you and they're justa little bit wired.
You know, and I'm sure that somany people can relate to this,
you know, when your dog flipsthat switch you might get
zoomies.
That's a really good indicatorthat you get sometimes.
(23:08):
We need to help our dogssometimes make the decision to
go and rest.
You know it's like a toddler,right.
You know, when they're like Idon't need my nap, when actually
that's the moment that theyabsolutely need their map
because they they've completelygone over the edge, it's time to
sleep and they're always insuch a better mood and in such a
better frame of mind oncethey've had that little bit of
rest.
Our dogs can often be the samewhen they've got a full bucket,
(23:30):
they usually don't make the bestchoices.
So having the crate, having itas a relaxing place, same as a
boundary, it can really help ourdogs.
Empty that bucket and thenwe're less likely to get those
bad choices like stealing socks,stealing mice.
Lauren Langman (23:50):
Stealing the mouse.
She's so funny, she's likerabbit for supper and I'm like
no rabbit for supper, we're nothaving rabbit for supper.
I want to give one last example, and that is a game that people
used to play and she's therehaving her chew now.
And what people used to do withdogs is they used to go and
test them and try and take itaway.
And I say used to, becausethat's not the school and the
dog training world I'm inanymore, but I think it probably
(24:11):
does still happen where peoplelike test and take and they want
to take things away, like she'shere considering right now
whether she can steal.
I think she's got this one onher like horizon, so like that's
the sort of thing she wouldhappily take.
As you can see, drop the candle, um.
And so that would be thescenario that you would see
typically, um and I know somepeople are listening and not not
looking and then you'd havesomeone trying to grab it.
(24:33):
Sorry for my random yeah butyou'd have someone trying to
grab it and pull it, and pull it, and pull it, and pull it and
suddenly that became a toy andsomething of interest to the
animal, which actually wasn't ahuge interest before, and you
can see how that would becomelike a real object of desire for
the animal.
I personally, if I wanted totake that back, I would only be
playing with this thing.
I definitely wouldn't bewhere'd it go, but I wouldn't be
(24:55):
grabbing that and if she wasgrabbing that I wouldn't be
paying massive interest to it.
If I was going to take it atall, the way that I would take
it is I'd be talking to herabout something else, so I
wouldn't be, and she is the typeof dog that would become quite
obsessed with it quite quickly.
So she's the sort of dog thatwould be very, very interested
and intrigued by the fact thatshe'd just taken something off a
(25:16):
table, which I kind ofencouraged.
Um, but actually for me the toythat's back here or the chew
that's back here, that would bethe object of interest and the
object that I didn't want her tohave, which you can see how
already that's become, yeah, anobject of high desire, and I
would try really hard not tomake a very big deal of it if I
was going to take it, like Isaid, in the ideal scenario.
You actually have something.
(25:36):
I love it.
She's chin targeting for it.
Sam Askew (25:38):
Now she's trying everything now, isn't she?
Yeah?
Lauren Langman (25:41):
best chin target for the little elephant, and it
shows you how quickly somethingbecomes you can have it and
something becomes a high desire.
Like I wouldn't, I wouldn'tmake such a thing of it, like I
don't even know what it is.
It's like some sort of littlehand thing.
I don't use it, I don't evenknow what it is, what I's like
some sort of little hand thing,I don't use it, I don't even
know what it is.
What I would say is, people thenmake such a big deal of it that
that becomes a problem, andactually the worst thing she's
(26:04):
going to do is like throw itaround a bit and kill it a bit.
I just think, like notice howeasily you can turn something
into something it isn't, and Ithink it's a real prize for your
(26:24):
dog, um, so I think I think thelesson for me there, or for for
us, there is a yes, I set thatup.
The little elephant was hereand I let her tip it over and
pull it back, and the reallesson is, though, you can make
that into an object of massivedesire, and if you, you can see
how now she's like got her prize, but if you then took that away
and hid it, or like createdgrowling over it.
Sam Askew (26:40):
That would be a massive issue.
Lauren Langman (26:42):
That would be, yeah, for sure if it's not an
issue, leave it alone.
Like I don't.
I've never used it.
I don't even know what it's for.
Like it's a hand grip thing.
I think.
Um number one it's for her,it's a dog toy.
Like she sees it as a dog toy.
Um number two, if I am going totake it away, the way I would
do it I haven't got any food uphere, but, um, I would just
scatter some food around and I'dstart to get to move.
When I do want to take that oneaway, I'll just ask her to come
off her bed and trot down thestairs with me and go out to the
(27:04):
garden and have a scatter orsomething.
Like she.
There is no issue with it.
Um, I love how proud she is.
Look at her.
This is the best moment ever inmy life I like elephant.
Sam Askew (27:14):
She's just such a just carefree, isn't it?
Lauren Langman (27:17):
like, so carefree and lovely like that is
.
That is just so lovely.
Like, don't, like, don't get soyeah, it is don't take yourself
so seriously and don't take yourdog too seriously, like these
are dogs and and they will bedogs and, if anything, I find it
quite endearing and quite,quite cute.
So, yes, of course we're nottrying to encourage dogs to
steal, but you know what?
Let's try and see the brighterand lighter side in life,
(27:39):
because life's serious enoughwithout us getting too upset
about a weird elephant toy thatwe've never used or seen anyway.
So, sam, if anyone was thinkingabout whether the 10 days to
stop stealing badge would beworth it for them, what would
you say?
£27.
Sam Askew (27:53):
Of course.
Lauren Langman (27:54):
Should they do it?
Sam Askew (27:56):
Go and get it now.
Go and get it now.
Go and get it now.
Yeah, I really do.
I mean I've I've filmed thatbadge because I have, you know,
personal experience in it andI'm hugely passionate about
helping anybody else to try andavoid or try and try and reframe
what is maybe already happeningto them.
So absolutely go and buy it.
I'm a huge advocate of it.
It can get better.
(28:17):
I promise it can get better.
Lauren Langman (28:19):
She just did the funniest little thing.
You know, when they do stealsomething, they get it.
They really love it.
She does this with a mouse too,and she's like a little shake,
yeah, killing the little thing.
I'm like, oh, you're a littlemenace.
Most of the mice she has foundare already dead, by the way,
but this one, this littleelephant thing, is alive in her
mind, so she's funny.
So that was this episode of theSex and Squirrel podcast.
(28:39):
Get hold of the Stop Stealingbadge.
It's lifetime access, if youhaven't already.
It's led by the wonderful SamSam.
I am green eggs and ham and shereally, really, really does
know her stuff when it comes tostopping stealing, and I know
she put her heart and soul intothat badge and loved, loved
filming it.
So, guys, I will see you nextweek.
(29:03):
Make sure you're there.
Make sure you're thereDefinitely, definitely square.
And make sure, most of all,you've shared this podcast with
all of your dog training friends.
And remember to stay sexy.
Welcome to the Absolute Dog Sex in a Squirrel
podcast.
I'm Lauren Langman.
I'm one of the world's leadingdog trainers and it's my mission
to help owners become theirdog's top priority.
In each episode, you'lldiscover how to gain trust and
communicate with your dog likenever before, creating
unbreakable bonds that make youthe most exciting part of their
world.
Hello and welcome to theSexiness Girl podcast, the
(00:31):
podcast that gives you real-lifedog training and sometimes
human training results too.
Now, today I'm joined by thewonderful Sam Sam.
We're talking stealing.
Tell me why stealing has been aproblem in your life, and that
sounds kind of ominous, right itdoes.
Sam Askew (00:48):
You're making me sound like I'm the thief here.
No, no, no, it's.
It's my dog.
I swear it's my dog.
It's not me, although if you'veever watched Supertrainer Live,
I actually do steal on there afew times, so it could be about
me.
Anyway, uh, stealing with ourdogs can be a real problem,
right, it can be painful in alot of ways and, uh, it can
(01:09):
definitely be frustrating andsometimes it can be really
dangerous.
You know, we've we've had dogsat the center that have, um, you
know, wanted to swallow socksand then it gets into their
intestines and then it's a vetvisit and it's very expensive
and you know it can.
It can be so many differentproblems and I've actually
experienced this myself.
Um, one of my dogs actuallyboth my dogs, really to some
(01:30):
extent, but particularly one ofthem um, will just steal
anything.
I mean literally anything.
She'll take it out of therubber, she gets in a bin she's
a tiny little Jack Russellterrier and somehow she manages
to get into our bin, which is atleast twice the height of her.
I don't know how she does it.
Still, she just gets in there.
But she will grab anything inthere and she will, if she can
eat it.
She will eat it, you know shewill shred it and she will
(01:50):
ingest it.
So these sorts of things.
You know you kind of want toget a handle on it.
Um, I also kind of got to thisbit where you're trying to,
you're like I need to get it offthem and you're trying to get
it off them and then it evolvesinto like they're growling at
you and you know it's just thiswhole big, huge mess.
So it can be really, reallypainful, really painful and
(02:11):
stealing can be a massive issue,can't it?
Lauren Langman (02:14):
when it comes to ?
You know what the dogs, whenthey start to clamp and hold and
I'm thinking my dog skittle shedoesn't really steal anything
in the house so much, but shereally really will get hold of
like a mouse, a rabbit, uh, anobject, and like the red mist
comes down and like her eyes aregone and like you try and go
into a jaw.
And she's only a little cutespaniel.
She's seven kilos, like we'renot talking like some big
(02:36):
mastiff or or bull terrier here.
We're talking like a seven kilo, fluffy spaniel, but the clamp
on the jaw is pretty impressive.
And and you actually need tohave dog training, not a strong
hand when it comes to this, andI think there's so many people
that think that a strong handwill do it.
And I think historically in dogtraining, I mean, certainly my
dad would have resorted topunishment or some form of
(02:58):
aversive to get that thing back,or would have shouted or got
angry or all of the above.
And I've grown up in adifferent world.
I've grown up very much in thepositive reinforcement sort of
karen prior sort of world andera and um and and the late
karen prior, which is isincredible because she was such
a huge influence on my, mypositive reinforcement and
understanding of quadrants andhow dogs learn, for me actually
(03:19):
understanding that there is nopoint me fighting a dog when
they're in that space andactually we need to train better
.
Now I know you're exactlyaligned here and we're in
alignment.
What would you say when it comesto stealing?
What are some of your top tips,some of your suggestions?
Now, I know you've got,obviously, the Stop Stealing
badge that people might not haveseen the 10 days to stop
stealing just £27, which isincredible value.
(03:42):
But what are some of the thingsyou cover when you're there?
And if you haven't already seenthat, one head to
absolute-dogscom.
Yeah, I think it's that.
So check out the Stop Stealingbadge because it's £27, lifetime
access.
But, sam, what do you cover whenwe're talking Stop Stealing?
And what tips can we give topeople that maybe haven't got
the badge or don't have thecapacity to purchase a badge?
And capacity to purchase abadge, um, and?
And what can, what can we helpthem with?
(04:03):
Because I know that stealing isa massive issue?
And when you said about vetfees, I think that fees, for
sure, but I also know one of mycustomers, their dog did it
enough times.
The dog needed putting to sleepand that was horrific.
It was a three-year-old spaniel.
Three-year-old basically grab.
This dog would grab stones andthe last time they operated on
him, his, his, um intestine waswas just basically was screwed.
It was not going to allow anymore um operations to be had on
(04:26):
it and so that dog was put sleepcase, which is really horrific
for a seven-year-old, right.
So this is a baby.
Sorry, a three-year-old is ababy.
Sam Askew (04:34):
Um, yeah, that was it very early on in life three or
four intestine ops and and it'sdone.
Lauren Langman (04:38):
So, yeah, what are your tips for stop stealing?
I know you've done the badge, Iknow there is um access to a
course out there for people thatwant it, but what are your tips
?
What can you share and I'mhappy to jump in with you oh, I
think so.
Sam Askew (04:49):
The very first thing is to say that it's.
You know, it's such a normalbehavior.
You know, don't, don't getfreaked out like that.
Your dog is doing this reallyhorrible, naughty thing.
They are just driven by likepure desire.
You know they're seeking outpleasure and they're avoiding
pain, right.
So we're, we're kind of lookingat that and going, okay,
they're just doing somethingthat they're finding pleasure in
.
Okay, we don't want to, wedon't want to go crazy and try
(05:12):
and grab.
That's the first thing I wouldsay is don't just try and grab
the thing off your dog, becauseoften what I find with that is
then you've got a dog that wantsit more, you've created an
event out of that, you've madeit a big deal, you've made that,
um, that object even moredesirable to them.
So the first thing is don'tdon't grab it, don't try and get
it off them, becausepotentially you're actually just
(05:33):
making that worse and makingthat behavior much more um, much
more kind of like ingrainedwithin your dog.
Um, the thing I would thinkabout doing is can we swap it?
It it sounds so simple, butwhat do they love in their lives
that they're going to want togive that up to.
You know, if I had somebroccoli and someone said, would
(05:54):
you like some cake?
Yeah, absolutely, let's swapright this second.
So if we think about that withour dogs, you know you've got a
sock.
Well, how about some tasty meat?
Or how about your mostfavourite toy?
Or how about another sock?
And we have a bit of a playwith some socks, you know, and
we can actually create like agame out of this and make it so
that this is something that'sreally easy to let our dogs to
(06:17):
let go for us.
Lauren Langman (06:20):
What would be your first tip?
Yeah, I mean, swapping is hugefor me and I think the biggest
thing is not making, like yousaid, an event out of it, but
also trying to be reallydisinterested in the object,
like that dead rabbit that youare trying to find
scrumdiddlyumptious right now.
You know what.
It is so dull, it is so boring,whereas most people are like
squealing about it or like mydog, like this is, this is
(06:43):
skittles, for those of you thatdon't know skittles, and they're
skittles.
Uh, she's on her bed eating achew, having a lovely time of it
.
As soon as you start to payloads of attention to that chew,
I'm not going to do it becauseI don't think that's
particularly fair on her.
And she is.
She's not guardy, but I thinkyou could make her guardy, um,
because she's quite possessive.
So she's possessive but notguardy.
So if you go to pull it off her, she'll possess it, but she's
not growly or or mean or snarly,but I think you could make her
(07:06):
that way, because a dog that'sgot like that natural possession
, I think those are the dogsthat you can.
You can sort of instigate it in, and in some sports you'll try
to like in in schutzen that'soften or like police work.
That's how you often get themto bark in front of something
because they're possessing, andso I think for me, one of my
biggest tips would be for theowner to find that object so
(07:26):
dull and sometimes that objectis your wedding ring or that is
your remote control, or like Iwatch the people where the chimp
comes out in them, like that,like mode and and it's like no,
you need to be the adult hereand you need to just be like I'm
so not interested in whatyou're doing.
I'm seriously not interested inwhat you've got, like it really
does not interest me.
And it's the same as whenpeople put bait in front of you,
(07:48):
like I know someone might putsomething in front of your
social media and they want youto bite on it, and you're like
I'm not biting on that, oryou'll hear it in like office
politics or like um staffrelationships, or, and someone
wants you to bite, they're aninstigator, a kid at school or
whatever.
There's an inst get, don't beinstinct, don't, don't, don't be
drawn to those.
And so for me, yeah, makingmaking my own a really neutral,
(08:08):
really like boring, notinterested in the dead rabbit, I
mean skills, had a, had aheadless rabbit on easter sunday
, which felt reallyinappropriate.
It was like her version of ahorror story.
And um, and she recently had amouse and all we could see was
its tail like out the end of hermouth and it was like moving
tail thing and like.
Those sorts of situations arejust horrible and you want to
(08:28):
squeal right, you want to squeal.
The worst thing you can do issqueal and, like you said, trade
yeah, and it's hard to tradewhen it's like that because
that's such a precious object.
So it's like it's like um thehobbit and my precious, my
precious, and you can just seeher like my precious and her
eyes are popping out of her headand she's red and I love what
you said.
It's really natural behavior.
This is a really natural thing.
(08:50):
This is not a dog who.
It's abnormal behavior.
This is a dog that you'reworking with.
We're so lucky we're workingwith a present like being that
is showing you all of itsnatural instincts and prey
methods and all of the thingsthey do.
But I think, like my mum justcooked up a load of steak we had
steak that was like on the dayit should be used.
Mum said do you want anythingtonight?
I said I'm really not up forthat tonight, and so I said I'll
(09:12):
just just cook it all up forthe dogs.
And so she's cooked it all upthe dogs.
We'll use it as treats.
That's the sort of thing thatwould be a great high value
scatter, whereas I don't thinkskittle would let go of a dead
rabbit for a piece of kibble.
She'd be like it's a bad dealand she definitely wouldn't for
the person who pretends to do itwhat's this, what's this,
what's this?
And then doesn't give it to her.
So, and a lot of people havejust got a record deal.
They're offering like fivepence an hour.
(09:32):
Let's not offer five pence anhour, let's offer like a hundred
of steak here.
And people that worry that theyare giving the dog what they
wanted.
No, the dog didn't grab thething to do that.
Actually, the dog is alreadywanting to grab things.
This is a dog who has that inthem to do.
(09:53):
What you need to do is managethe spaces better and not find
yourself drawn into bigdiscussions and arguments with
that dog, because you won't winand you don't ever want to beat
it out of them.
Sam Askew (10:08):
And there are people out there who would like to.
So, yeah, I've said more thanmy turn.
You go, sam.
Um, I think you actually justtouched on it there.
I think setting up space, sothinking about, um, my dog
getting in the bin, would be agreat example.
Okay, she keeps getting in thebin, it keeps happening.
Okay, well, hang on a minute,rather than me fighting against,
trying to, you know, constantly, stop her from doing that.
Actually, how about I get adifferent bin?
How about I get a bin that'sgot a lid that she can't open?
(10:31):
You know, how about?
I'd say, get a taller bin, butthat doesn't seem to work?
Uh, just a bin that the liddoesn't open?
Yeah, let's not put food on theside at a dog's height where
they're going to grab it,because, realistically speaking,
you're putting them in aposition where they're you,
really you're setting them up tofail.
Yeah, let's not set them up tofail because, realistically
speaking, then they're not.
They don't think in the sameway that we do in terms of like,
(10:53):
should I, shouldn't I?
They're looking at somethingthat they have desire for and
they want to get it, and so, ifthey can, yeah, they might.
You know, and then you've gotthis reinforcement behavior
where it's been.
It's exciting, it's happened afew times.
They've got a really cool winout of it.
It becomes an even bigger deal,an even better deal, and
they're more likely to do itagain and again.
So if we can actually just setthe space up cleverly so they're
(11:17):
less likely to do it in thefirst place, you know, then
we're in for a winner becausewe're not even starting that
behavior in the first place.
You know, that would be.
That would be my top tip forsomebody that hasn't got this
behavior in place already, thathasn't got a dog that already
loves stealing.
However, if you've got a dogthat already loves stealing, I
(11:37):
think my other one would belet's think about um, let's
think about teaching your doglike a bit of a retrieve, and
let's think about having ourdogs be able to bring us things.
You know, maybe that's bringingit to their beds, or maybe it's
bringing it to their crate, ormaybe it's bringing it to your
hand.
It doesn't have to be a superfancy, formal retrieve, it
doesn't have to be perfect.
Can they just bring it to youand pop it on the ground in
(11:58):
front of you, or maybe swap itout for that thing that you've
got.
You've played that game, soyou've got two tips there really
nice.
Lauren Langman (12:04):
Two tips really really nice.
And I think, going back to thatbin and that setup and I'll
give you an example, mine's aslightly different one but I've
got a toy bin in the arena andit's like a laundry bin full of
toys.
So this laundry bill bin isabsolutely chocker, rammed like
topped up with toys and toys andtoys and toys.
And I was getting reallyfrustrated because in most of my
training sessions skit wouldrun, dive in it and grab
(12:26):
something out.
And I mean this is like a tallbin, it's like this high, and
she'd land in it.
And I've got some funny videoson the absolute dogs page where
she's doing this and she'sliterally running, landing in,
rummaging and it would be reallyannoying.
It's often like partway througha session she'd just leg it and
run off.
And then one day I thought whyhave I got the toy bin in the
middle of the arena?
Like why have I not put the toybin outside of the arena,
outside of the gate, on top of atable?
(12:47):
And since I put it outside ofthe arena, outside of the gate,
on top of the table, she doesn'tdo it.
But it's because you'veinterrupted the practicing of
that behavior.
So no, she's not to practice itand no, you're not allowing her
to practice it.
And I think that's really,really important, that you're
not giving them the need topractice it.
I think that's that's reallykey, because if you allow that
(13:09):
thing to be reinforced again andagain, and again and again, or
practiced again and again, andagain and again, of course it
will build.
So what they rehearse theybecome.
And sometimes the other thingis you find it funny like I
found it really funny that shewas running the object.
Like I found it really cute aswell.
I was like, oh my god, she's sodamn cute, like she's really
cute when she's doing it, and soI think there's a level of you
(13:32):
kind of find it funny until it'sa problem.
And it's the same with thepuppy like they're quite cute.
Like she decided she became theAndrex puppy the other day and
decided to grab a toilet rolland was like fluffing it all
around the room and I was likeha ha ha, oh, no, ha ha ha, no,
no, no, actually this is not haha ha, like it's funny for like
a second.
And then you're like no,actually this really isn't funny
because there's fluffeverywhere.
So I think that's reallyimportant to acknowledge.
So yeah, those are just acouple of mine.
Sam Askew (13:54):
I remember, um, I remember when I first got, uh,
when we first got our dog Lou.
You know who's our oldest dog?
Um, she's not like, she'snearly nine now, which is
absolutely insane.
Um, but she it's.
That is crazy, isn't it?
You sort of go wow, that's nineyears, that's like a puppy
she's like, she's like blink,like a puppy she does.
She, yeah, she doesn't.
She does not look likeeverybody's, like nine, no way
(14:16):
she's such a such a little puppy.
Um, we took her to um, to mywife's family for, uh, I don't
know, it was like a barbecue orsomething like that.
Um, and we're all sat around,we're all eating, we all eat,
you know, sat eating in theliving room on our laps with our
plates.
Now, bear in mind, at thispoint she was a young dog,
really, you know, quite a youngpuppy, um, big enough that she'd
started to, you know, be ableto, like, jump a little bit and
(14:38):
and get up, trying to get up onpeople's laps, and that kind of
stuff.
And we didn't know what I know.
Now, you know, I I didn't knowabout um, about absolute dogs,
um, and this sort of way oftraining or anything like that.
It was kind of just afree-for-all, just like your dog
, would you know?
They just they get on with it,don't they do what they like um,
so everybody sat around and mybrother-in-law, who is probably
the person that that likes dogsthe least in the entire family,
(15:00):
um, he sits down with his bigplate, like like a plowman's,
and there's a massive lump ofcheese on the edge of the plate
and my dog goes up, of course,and just yoinks that cheese and
runs off and scoffers all of it.
And it was hilarious.
It was embarrassing as well,but it was very, very funny.
But I look at that sink likewhat?
What a terrible setup.
(15:21):
You know, I let a small youngpuppy just have free roam while
people had food on their laps.
You know that really.
I mean what?
What did I expect?
How could I expect anythingelse in that situation?
That would be like, um, puttingsweets out on a table and
letting a toddler come in andmake a better choice.
You know that's, they're justnot.
They haven't got that mentalcapacity at that age to make
(15:44):
good choices.
So we kind of have to guidethem a little bit.
We need to help them out.
Um, I, but I can't.
That story just always makes megiggle because she still loves
cheese.
She gets a little quiver mouthto cheese it is.
Lauren Langman (15:57):
It is so true, though, isn't it like?
What responsibility are wegiving them?
And I was.
This is an interesting one, andyou'll know what I think about
this.
So we've got a massive dogtraining arena, and there's some
students that want to hire thedog train arena, and the dogs
aren't yet off lead, and it'sjust such a big responsibility
to put on that dog and thatowner so early on, when they
(16:19):
don't even know what they'relooking for at this stage, and I
think that's really importantto acknowledge.
Um and so um, whilst we're very,very happy to hire the arena,
actually are the handler and dogable to handle that
responsibility, which is how tohandle the equipment, how to
handle the dog and how to handlethe fact they don't want the
dog to go to the toilet?
All of those kind of thingslike they're all really really,
really important in the setupthat is handling in an arena,
(16:44):
and so I think that's, I thinkthat's quite key to acknowledge
and key to um understand.
To be honest, I also think andthis is a really interesting one
that the amount ofresponsibility we do give
puppies and young dogs and andyoung adults and adolescents and
everything else, I thinkthere's a lot of responsibility
we put on them, like a massiveamount of responsibility we put
on them and yeah, so often weexpect a lot of them, don't we?
(17:06):
so often completely unwarranted,like we haven't got any
evidence that they're ready forthat responsibility.
Another example I'll give youum, we've got, uh, two
staircases.
One of the staircases in thehouse is carpeted and suitable
for dogs and the other one is,um, really polished wood and
glass.
And the other day skittles gotaccess to the polished wooden
glass and she was likescooby-doo and went smack into
the bottom of the glass at thebottom and it was horrific and I
(17:28):
was like why on earth did wegive her access to that room?
There's me thinking that she'sgot the like sense not to go on
those because she's never beenon those.
But when she was went lookingfor us, she decided that was
appropriate and she's not ableto sort of.
They're not for dogs.
The other staircase is for dogsand so it's those types of
things like have you given them?
Do they really understand theboundaries?
Do they really understand likeI could leave the room and leave
(17:50):
food on the table with braveand she would leave it alone?
She can handle thatresponsibility.
There is no chance I would dothat with skittle, and what you
need to know is which and Iwould.
It's a sort of what I'd like tovideo it.
You look, walk out the room andyou tell them, leave that alone
.
And you just walk out the roomand and I can see venture
looking out of the room and thengoing, I'm having it and
whereas you can see brave justlooking around like not allowed
(18:10):
this, not allowed this, notallowed this, like I'm watching
her right now.
She's considering what she cansteal over there.
She's thinking about what sortof rope she can pull up, because
she's she's got her head rightdown it.
She's bored of her chew andshe's now considering like, what
can she grab?
So she's grabbed a piece ofpaper by the looks of it, and
she's thinking about whether shecan pull those over.
She's got a nice chew here, butshe's considering what else is
on offer, and that is what'swhat's done.
(18:31):
I think that's probably anotherone to add in, though.
Here isn't there boundaries, andI think boundaries are really
helpful for setting your dog upif you're in games club as part
of games club.
If you're not in games club, goand check out absolute dog
store, absolute dash dogscom andon on the games um club, um
sort of community.
There are thousands of games,but one of my favorite badges is
(18:53):
the real life boundaries badgeand I just love using boundaries
and so I know you talked aboutboundaries in your in your
stealing course, but, um, itsounds like we've got
professional stealing course.
It's actually hilarious.
Um, but in your stealing courseyou do talk about boundaries
and the use of boundaries andsetups and management and how
you manage.
But, yeah, boundaries would bekey to me.
How about you, sam?
Sam Askew (19:15):
yeah, I think, I think boundaries are huge.
I also um, I've also trained acrate, so I mean, it is another
form of a boundary, essentially,and it just happens to be a
door there.
You know, um, and we train thatvery similarly, actually, and
really we're looking at um,sometimes you need a bit more
containment and again it comesdown to responsibility of the
dog.
Can they handle it, them beingon a boundary which is actually
(19:35):
quite an open space, and theyhave an element of of having to
make a choice to stay on it,whereas crate, you've got a
little bit more control overthat.
It's still a positive space.
It's still, you know, a reallyhappy space for your dog to be
in, but it also actuallysometimes just gives them a
breather, it gives them a um, itgives them a break from all of
the huge amounts of choices thatthey have to make, helps you
(19:56):
prevent the rehearsal of all ofthat.
And that's probably the keything.
And something that we do coverin the badge is to think about,
um, the differences between dogsthat have already rehearsed
this behavior and dogs thathaven't, because sometimes how
you would approach that is very,very different.
You know a dog that hasn'trehearsed any of those behaviors
you've got.
You've got a good foundationthere to sort of go okay, let's
(20:18):
set it up right, let's let'smake help, help them make the
right choices.
You know, and you can play someof these games, but you
probably might never need themthat's what you would hope
whereas maybe a dog that hasrehearsed that behavior got some
ingrained love of stealingright.
You've got a dog that wants togo and steal this stuff for
whatever reason.
They find it rewarding.
You might never know why, butthey find it really exciting and
(20:40):
they really love it.
So we look a little bit moreinto some of the strategies that
you would then do to try andchange the picture.
You know, change it up, make itlook different for your dog,
make it look different in theway that they handle it, in the
way that you handle it, the waythat you manage that situation,
which is kind of the key thing.
Lauren Langman (20:56):
Crates is a huge one for me, for that for sure
and in terms of crates, sam, Imean I use crates, gates, stairs
, sort of situations, pens, likewhatever I need to I have 10
dogs, so I have.
I have lots of different likescenarios.
I might need to use them for um, but but crates for me.
I really like my dogs to bevery relaxed in the crate and
it's not their event and it'snot their business and if I have
(21:17):
got guests I'd ask them toleave the crate alone.
Skittles is brilliant withcrates.
Like people don't know thatshe's in in the house when they
come in and I kind of like that,because then she's not like
entertainment for them, if thatmakes sense.
But um, would you?
Would you say your dogs arenice and relaxing crates.
Is that something you'vetrained and worked on and is
that something you have to build?
Because I know that for me,that is that's fundamental in
(21:38):
bringing home a new dog yeah,absolutely.
Sam Askew (21:42):
We're certainly not just sort of popping them in
there and leaving them to it.
It's.
It is something that we'vegrown to be a positive place and
then, on top of that, we'vegrown it to be a really calm
place.
You know, um to be literally aplace of relaxation and calm,
and this is none of yourbusiness anymore and it's time
to just chill out.
And sometimes you know our dogsand this is good for the
stealing thing really, in termsof we talk about a dog's bucket
(22:05):
and sometimes their buckets.
You know they can get a reallyfull bucket.
It's like it basically.
Uh, the amount of stress thatgoes into a dog's personality,
right, or a day and you thinkabout yourself, you have, um,
you start off your day great,you've had your wheat a bit, so
whatever it is that you have forbreakfast, uh, you go through
your day, but then added stressgets.
It gets it starts to top you up, starts to get higher and
(22:27):
higher and then eventually,because you've not had a break,
you've not managed to stress, ifyou've not kind of given
yourself a bit of respite, itboils over and you're shouting
at a co-staff or, um, I don'tknow, you're throwing your pen
at a wall, whatever.
Whatever you do, essentiallyyour bucket overflows because
it's just too much.
Now, sometimes our dogs getthat as well.
(22:47):
They've had too much in a day.
It could be good stuff, youknow, they could have had a
really long walk, they couldhave like met some new people,
they could have had I don't knowsome like really yummy fun
games with you and they're justa little bit wired.
You know, and I'm sure that somany people can relate to this,
you know, when your dog flipsthat switch you might get
zoomies.
That's a really good indicatorthat you get sometimes.
(23:08):
We need to help our dogssometimes make the decision to
go and rest.
You know it's like a toddler,right.
You know, when they're like Idon't need my nap, when actually
that's the moment that theyabsolutely need their map
because they they've completelygone over the edge, it's time to
sleep and they're always insuch a better mood and in such a
better frame of mind oncethey've had that little bit of
rest.
Our dogs can often be the samewhen they've got a full bucket,
(23:30):
they usually don't make the bestchoices.
So having the crate, having itas a relaxing place, same as a
boundary, it can really help ourdogs.
Empty that bucket and thenwe're less likely to get those
bad choices like stealing socks,stealing mice.
Lauren Langman (23:50):
Stealing the mouse.
She's so funny, she's likerabbit for supper and I'm like
no rabbit for supper, we're nothaving rabbit for supper.
I want to give one last example, and that is a game that people
used to play and she's therehaving her chew now.
And what people used to do withdogs is they used to go and
test them and try and take itaway.
And I say used to, becausethat's not the school and the
dog training world I'm inanymore, but I think it probably
(24:11):
does still happen where peoplelike test and take and they want
to take things away, like she'shere considering right now
whether she can steal.
I think she's got this one onher like horizon, so like that's
the sort of thing she wouldhappily take.
As you can see, drop the candle, um.
And so that would be thescenario that you would see
typically, um and I know somepeople are listening and not not
looking and then you'd havesomeone trying to grab it.
(24:33):
Sorry for my random yeah butyou'd have someone trying to
grab it and pull it, and pull it, and pull it, and pull it and
suddenly that became a toy andsomething of interest to the
animal, which actually wasn't ahuge interest before, and you
can see how that would becomelike a real object of desire for
the animal.
I personally, if I wanted totake that back, I would only be
playing with this thing.
I definitely wouldn't bewhere'd it go, but I wouldn't be
(24:55):
grabbing that and if she wasgrabbing that I wouldn't be
paying massive interest to it.
If I was going to take it atall, the way that I would take
it is I'd be talking to herabout something else, so I
wouldn't be, and she is the typeof dog that would become quite
obsessed with it quite quickly.
So she's the sort of dog thatwould be very, very interested
and intrigued by the fact thatshe'd just taken something off a
(25:16):
table, which I kind ofencouraged.
Um, but actually for me the toythat's back here or the chew
that's back here, that would bethe object of interest and the
object that I didn't want her tohave, which you can see how
already that's become, yeah, anobject of high desire, and I
would try really hard not tomake a very big deal of it if I
was going to take it, like Isaid, in the ideal scenario.
You actually have something.
(25:36):
I love it.
She's chin targeting for it.
Sam Askew (25:38):
Now she's trying everything now, isn't she?
Yeah?
Lauren Langman (25:41):
best chin target for the little elephant, and it
shows you how quickly somethingbecomes you can have it and
something becomes a high desire.
Like I wouldn't, I wouldn'tmake such a thing of it, like I
don't even know what it is.
It's like some sort of littlehand thing.
I don't use it, I don't evenknow what it is, what I's like
some sort of little hand thing,I don't use it, I don't even
know what it is.
What I would say is, people thenmake such a big deal of it that
that becomes a problem, andactually the worst thing she's
(26:04):
going to do is like throw itaround a bit and kill it a bit.
I just think, like notice howeasily you can turn something
into something it isn't, and Ithink it's a real prize for your
(26:24):
dog, um, so I think I think thelesson for me there, or for for
us, there is a yes, I set thatup.
The little elephant was hereand I let her tip it over and
pull it back, and the reallesson is, though, you can make
that into an object of massivedesire, and if you, you can see
how now she's like got her prize, but if you then took that away
and hid it, or like createdgrowling over it.
Sam Askew (26:40):
That would be a massive issue.
Lauren Langman (26:42):
That would be, yeah, for sure if it's not an
issue, leave it alone.
Like I don't.
I've never used it.
I don't even know what it's for.
Like it's a hand grip thing.
I think.
Um number one it's for her,it's a dog toy.
Like she sees it as a dog toy.
Um number two, if I am going totake it away, the way I would
do it I haven't got any food uphere, but, um, I would just
scatter some food around and I'dstart to get to move.
When I do want to take that oneaway, I'll just ask her to come
off her bed and trot down thestairs with me and go out to the
(27:04):
garden and have a scatter orsomething.
Like she.
There is no issue with it.
Um, I love how proud she is.
Look at her.
This is the best moment ever inmy life I like elephant.
Sam Askew (27:14):
She's just such a just carefree, isn't it?
Lauren Langman (27:17):
like, so carefree and lovely like that is
.
That is just so lovely.
Like, don't, like, don't get soyeah, it is don't take yourself
so seriously and don't take yourdog too seriously, like these
are dogs and and they will bedogs and, if anything, I find it
quite endearing and quite,quite cute.
So, yes, of course we're nottrying to encourage dogs to
steal, but you know what?
Let's try and see the brighterand lighter side in life,
(27:39):
because life's serious enoughwithout us getting too upset
about a weird elephant toy thatwe've never used or seen anyway.
So, sam, if anyone was thinkingabout whether the 10 days to
stop stealing badge would beworth it for them, what would
you say?
£27.
Sam Askew (27:53):
Of course.
Lauren Langman (27:54):
Should they do it?
Sam Askew (27:56):
Go and get it now.
Go and get it now.
Go and get it now.
Yeah, I really do.
I mean I've I've filmed thatbadge because I have, you know,
personal experience in it andI'm hugely passionate about
helping anybody else to try andavoid or try and try and reframe
what is maybe already happeningto them.
So absolutely go and buy it.
I'm a huge advocate of it.
It can get better.
(28:17):
I promise it can get better.
Lauren Langman (28:19):
She just did the funniest little thing.
You know, when they do stealsomething, they get it.
They really love it.
She does this with a mouse too,and she's like a little shake,
yeah, killing the little thing.
I'm like, oh, you're a littlemenace.
Most of the mice she has foundare already dead, by the way,
but this one, this littleelephant thing, is alive in her
mind, so she's funny.
So that was this episode of theSex and Squirrel podcast.
(28:39):
Get hold of the Stop Stealingbadge.
It's lifetime access, if youhaven't already.
It's led by the wonderful SamSam.
I am green eggs and ham and shereally, really, really does
know her stuff when it comes tostopping stealing, and I know
she put her heart and soul intothat badge and loved, loved
filming it.
So, guys, I will see you nextweek.
(29:03):
Make sure you're there.
Make sure you're thereDefinitely, definitely square.
And make sure, most of all,you've shared this podcast with
all of your dog training friends.
And remember to stay sexy.
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