The real reason women lose libido

I spoke with a GP yesterday, Dr Ivana Matic-Stancin, who shared something that stopped me in my tracks.

She said:

💬 “So many women come in to talk about menopause. And when I ask about their se.xual desire, they just wave me off—‘Oh no, let’s not go there.’”

And here’s what’s fascinating…

💔 Desire often ends up last on the list.
🔥 After the hot flashes.
🦴 After the joint pain.
😩 After the exhaustion.

And yet—when we’re not feeling pleasure, when we’re disconnected from touch, joy, and the softness of our own bodies—everything else becomes harder.

🌫️ Life feels like a slog.
🌵 We dry out—literally and emotionally.
🧬 Our health takes a hit.

And we start telling ourselves, “Maybe I just don’t need intimacy anymore.”

But it’s not that we don’t want intimacy.

It’s that we don’t want the version of it we’ve been given.

The rushed, disconnected, goal-oriented model?
The one where se.x is for pleasing someone else, or proving something, or chasing an orgasm?

🍟 That’s the McDonald’s of connection.

And when we were 20, maybe we could swallow that.
But after 40?

🍲 We want a slow-cooked, home-made meal of an experience.
One full of depth, warmth, and flavour.

🔹 42% of women report a decline in desire during perimenopause and menopause.

Your host:

Tarisha Tourok is the founder of the Sexually Empowered Radiant Woman movement where women learn how to become radiant, confident and own the power and beauty of their sexuality no matter their size, shape, age or race.

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