Shades of Strong® | Strength Without Struggle for Black Women

Shades of Strong® | Strength Without Struggle for Black Women

Welcome to Shades of Strong®, the podcast where Black women come to be seen, heard, and supported. Home of Support Languages™ for Black Women, this is your sanctuary for redefining strength, releasing overwhelm, and rewriting the narrative of what it means to be the “strong one.”

Episodes

September 23, 2025 16 mins
What does receiving support as a Black woman look like when there’s no one to call, no one to reach for, and no one checking in on you? In this episode, we're getting real about what it means to be your own support system when you’re literally all you’ve got. Not because you’re too proud to ask. Not because people keep letting you down. But because the support just isn’t there. I share my personal story of navigating lonely seasons...
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The world is a lot right now. Some weeks feel heavier than others, and this has been one of those weeks. I wasn’t about to just move like nothing was happening, so I came to the mic to sit with it for a minute. So let's pause, take a deep breath, and remind ourselves what it feels like to held.  Resources to Support You: Schedule a 1:1 Support Session Get the Guide: "You Know Your Support Language™—Now What?" Take the Su...
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Have you ever rewritten the same text five times just to make sure it didn’t sound too harsh? Ever softened your “no” so it wouldn’t feel like rejection? Ever held back your truth to avoid being called “too much”? Yeah… me too. In this episode, I’m naming the emotional labor Black women carry just to be seen as “easy.” I’m talking about the constant back-bending, the tiptoeing, the fear of being left — and how all of that is tied t...
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What do you do when you need to fall apart… but there’s no one there to hold you? This Support Snippet is me sitting with that exact question — and remembering what emotional care looked like back when I didn’t have to ask for it I’m reflecting on what emotional care looked like before life got complicated — and what it means to create that kind of care for yourself now. I’m taking you back to peanut butter and jelly sandwiches mad...
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For so many Black women, emotional safety started in the kitchen. The smell of Blue Magic, the sizzle of a straightening comb, the sound of “Hold your ear” — those weren’t just routines. They were rituals. In that chair by the stove, we found connection, care, and permission to let our guards down. Those moments — ordinary as they seemed — were often the first time emotional safety showed up for us.We didn’t always have the words f...
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August 22, 2025 5 mins
When we talk about loyalty, most of us think about relationships, family, or friendships. But there’s another kind of loyalty we don’t talk about enough — our loyalty to struggle. As Black women, we’ve been taught that struggle is part of who we are. That staying in relationships, jobs, or communities that drain us somehow proves our strength. That choosing ease means we’re abandoning our people, our roots, or our role as the “stro...
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We love to romanticize Ruth and Boaz like it’s the ultimate love story — but what if it’s really a story about being supported... for once? In this first episode back after my summer break, I’m digging into the part church never talked about: the quiet power of being chosen without earning it, being cared for without proving you deserve it, and receiving without struggle. This episode isn’t about marriage or fairy tale endings — it...
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Let’s talk about protecting your peace — and whether that’s really what you’re doing… or if you’re just getting your lick back in silence. In this minisode, I’m breaking down the Room to Breathe Support Language™ — the kind of support that shows up as space, quiet, and the ability to step away without guilt. But I’m also naming the moments when we call it “protecting our peace,” and it’s really a low-key way of making somebody else...
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I’m just gonna say it — I get annoyed when I see Black women using the phrase “women of color” when I know they mean Black women. In this episode, I’m talking about why that bothers me, where I think it comes from, and what it’s actually costing us to keep softening, shrinking, or diluting our language — especially in spaces that are supposed to be built for us. I share a recent moment that made me want to reflect out loud. Not to ...
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May 13, 2025 8 mins
They told us love was supposed to be everything. That if somebody loves you, that’s all you need. But how many times have you felt loved… and still felt completely alone? In this episode, I’m talking about that gap — the one between what people say and what they actually do. Because the truth is, love is not enough when it doesn’t come with support. And I get it. It’s hard to admit that out loud.Especially when you know they care.E...
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Inspired by the new Netflix series Forever, this Mother's Day episode is a soft but honest conversation about what happens when fear leads the way in parenting. When love is present, but support… isn’t. This isn’t a recap.This is a reflection. Because a lot of us were raised on protection that looked like pressure. On expectations that felt like love, but left little room to breathe. And now, many of us are trying to re-parent ours...
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Today we’re talking about support yourself during the hard seasons—and what it looks like when you have to be your own safe place. Some seasons are heavy.Some days, getting out of bed feels like a miracle.Some days, breathing through the next hour is the biggest victory you’ll claim. In this episode, I’m sharing what support looks like when you’re in the thick of a thing — when there’s no map, no quick fix, and no easy way to name ...
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April 15, 2025 14 mins
Today we're talking about receiving support as a Black woman—and why it still feels hard, even when it’s soft and real. What happens when someone shows up for you with tenderness and care… and your first instinct is to flinch? What do you do when support is being offered—but your body doesn’t know how to let it in? This episode started with a comment from my daughter…And what should’ve felt like joy, pride, even gratitude—turned in...
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Some days the weight is real, and you’re too tired to carry it, explain it, or make it sound better than it is. For the days when the tears come outta nowhere and your body says, “we can’t keep doing this”... This is a quiet reminder that you don’t owe anyone a breakdown of why you need rest. You don’t have to clean up your exhaustion or justify your pause. You get to be tired. You get to slow down. You get to be held without perfo...
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April 8, 2025 15 mins
Let’s talk about emotional exhaustion as a Black woman—and what it really means to be held. What if being held didn’t require you to fall apart first? What if it was something you could reach for before you hit the breaking point? This episode was recorded at five o’clock in the morning… no mic, no script, no prep—just me, a heavy heart, and a whole lot of truth. Because sometimes the softest, most honest thing you can do is show ...
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What if strength didn’t always have to come after the storm? In this episode of Shades of Strong, we’re unpacking what it means to embrace both joy and struggle—without letting one cancel out the other. Because too often as Black women, are taught that joy is something we earn after the hard part is over. That it’s the reward, not the right. But what if we flipped the script? In this episode of Shades of Strong, we’re unpacking wha...
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What does real support in relationships for Black women even look like? Because we know love without support is a thing—and it’s exhausting. This episode is a deep dive into what happens when you start asking for more than love… when you start asking for love that actually holds you — love that actually supports you. If you’ve ever found yourself feeling unseen or unsupported in a relationship, this episode is for you. Because supp...
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March 25, 2025 3 mins
Honoring your capacity is about choosing ease of exhaustion and creating space breathe, reset, and resst. What happens when the strong one needs a minute? This short episode is a reminder that honoring your capacity matters—especially for strong Black women who are always doing the most. If you’ve been pushing through, this one’s for you. This short episode is a reminder that honoring your capacity matters—especially for strong Bl...
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Getting support as a Black woman isn’t always as simple as just asking for it. Because let’s be real—how many times have people tried to “support” you, but instead of feeling lighter, you just felt drained, unseen, or misunderstood? That’s because support isn’t one-size-fits-all. There are specific types of support Black women need, but most of us aren’t getting them in the way that actually makes a difference. In this episode of S...
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February 23, 2025 5 mins
Setting the tone for the week ahead isn’t about rigid schedules or pushing yourself to do more—it’s about easing into the energy you want to carry with you. Before the world starts demanding things from you, take a moment to breathe, regroup, and move with intention. What You’ll Get in This Episode: Why setting the tone for the week ahead shifts how you experience it How flow can be more powerful than force A simple way to ...
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