Navigating Relationships and Modern Dating 240

This episode explores the complexities of love and relationships, emphasizing the importance of honest communication and vulnerability. By addressing uncomfortable truths and offering insights into both romantic connections and self-love, we remind listeners that genuine relationships require effort and authenticity. 

• Importance of uncomfortable conversations in relationships 
• Valentine's Day as an opportunity to nurture connections 
• Personal anecdotes reflecting on relationship struggles and growth 
• Research on future dating trends focusing on community connections 
• The shift from superficial connections to emotional intelligence and vulnerability 
• Encouragement for singles to engage with community activities, moving beyond dating apps 
• The role of trust and transparency in building stronger relationships

If you found value in today's show please return the favor and leave a positive review and share it with someone important to you! https://www.sharethestrugglepodcast.com/reviews/new/
Find all you need to know about the show https://www.sharethestrugglepodcast.com/
Official Facebook Page https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100077724159859

Join the 2% of Americans that Buy American and support American Together we can bring back American Manufacturing https://www.loudproudamerican.shop/
Loud Proud American Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Loudproudamerican
Loud Proud American Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/loud_proud_american/
Loud Proud American TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@loud_proud_american
Loud Proud American YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmYQtOt6KVURuySWYQ2GWtw

Thank you for Supporting My American Dream!

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:02):
On the eve of Lovers' Day, we take the time to slow
down and celebrate L-O-V-E love.
What does it take to have ahealthy, honest relationship?
And to all the single Pringlesout there, this episode is also
for you.
It's time to put down the boomboom apps as we reveal the super

(00:24):
secret hiding spot for allsingles to find a meaningful
connection.
But before all the sappy stuff,I'm going to start with some
personal, unhappy stuff.
But I have no fear.
At least it'll be funny.
Well, for you Not so much forme.
I don't find it funny at all.
Let me tell you something.

(00:46):
Everybody struggles.
The difference is some peoplechoose to go through it and some
choose to grow through it.
The choice is completely yours.
Which one you choose will havea very profound effect on the
way you live your life.
If you find strength in thestruggle, then this podcast is

(01:08):
for you.
If you have a relationship thatis comfortable with
uncomfortable conversations.
Uncomfortable conversationschallenge you, humble you and
they build you.
When you sprinkle a little timeand distance on it, it all
makes sense.
Most disagreements, they stemfrom our own insecurities.

(01:31):
You are right where you need tobe and that's what it takes.
I'll take on what it takes Tomove fast.
What it did, what it hot.

(01:53):
Good Lord Almighty, am I soexcited To be back with you?
Oh, it's true, it's damn true,mm do you do?
Baby boo, I truly hope that thesun is shining on you.

(02:17):
I truly hope that you werecounting blessings and you were
feeling all kinds of special.
If you're listening to thisepisode of the podcast on the
day that it drops a trulyfabulous, winning Wednesday then
you are receiving this goodgospel on the eve of Valentine's
Day, the Lover's Day.

(02:39):
Well, I do believe at some pointin time, maybe Hallmark and
Walmart and Target and any otherstore took advantage of all of
us with this pre-prescribedholiday, and it's another good
opportunity to dig into yourwallets and your pocketbooks,
your purses, whatever.

(03:01):
People don't even do thatanymore.
Everybody just be tapping andpaying.
You know what I mean.
Here's my plastic.
Here's my watch, bloop.
Here's my.
Even do that anymore.
Everybody just be tapping andpaying.
You know what I mean.
Here's my plastic.
Here's my watch, bloop.
Here's my phone, bloop.
Just pay, pay, pay, what up?
That was weird and uncomfortable.
Did I make you uncomfortable?
I apologize, we're not off to agood start.
I'm already making youuncomfortable, but the point I'm
trying to make here is some ofthese holidays have been

(03:22):
depressed upon us.
They've been forced on us andthey, unless you want to provoke
a fight, encourage you to spendmoney to shower the ones you
love with love or make you feelanxious and depressed that
you're single and alone.
So I'm not real confident inthe benefits when it comes to

(03:45):
being forced to do something andbeing forced to realize you're
isolated and you're single.
You're out there on an island,you're never going to make it,
you're Wilson, lost at sea.
But if you push all those thingsaside, it is confessional, a
good opportunity to stop andslow down and celebrate the ones

(04:09):
you love, if you don't get lostin the big box store scenario
that comes with love.
On Lover's Day said Valentine'sDay, the pre-prescribed you got
to buy this.
I forgot what the average spendis these days for Valentine's
Day, but, pre-prescribed you gotto buy this.
I forgot what the average spendis these days for Valentine's
Day, but I'm pretty confident.
It's over a hundred dollars.
With the cost of everythingelse, with the cost of eggs and

(04:32):
gas and all those crazy thingsgoing on in the world, most
people don't have an extra ahundred 200 bucks to drop on
Valentine's Day.
So it's going to pressure youinto feeling bad, or you're
going to dig into the savingsand you're going to make
something happen, those thingsthere.
If we get on the other side ofthat, we just push that part of
the onion aside.

(04:54):
It's a great opportunity to slowdown and tell the ones you love
that you love them, toappreciate them, to count your
blessings, to be thankful and toshow them just how thankful you
are.
That should be the true meaningof Valentine's Day.
And if you're in a real, honest, healthy relationship, then
that is the true meaning ofValentine's Day.

(05:15):
Okay.
And if you're single and you'redepressed, guess what?
The day after Valentine's Dayyou're going to score some super
sweet deals on depressionchocolate.
Okay, hey, I love a good dealon some peanut butter and
chocolate If I can get me someof those Valentine's peanut
butter and chocolate.
Reese's hearts on discount.

(05:36):
Boy do I love me a bargain.
There's a benefit right there,y'all.
There's a benefit.
I love it.
But let's put all that stuffaside.
That's what's to come later onin today's episode of the
podcast, because later on I amgoing to be joined by my lovely,

(05:58):
beautiful, blushing bride, theone by my side.
My beautiful wife will bejoining me later on in today's
show, but she doesn't know thatright now.
So currently I'm recording thison my own and I'm just putting
the pressure on right now thatshe's going to be joining us.

(06:19):
She doesn't know it yet, okay,but on the eve of Valentine's
Day day, she wouldn't want tolet me and all you down and not
show up.
So we're gonna sprinkle alittle pressure on her plate and
I'm gonna beg for forgivenessif I have to, because it's
easier than asking forpermission.

(06:39):
So I'm gonna put it out thereright now.
We we're going to etch it instone that my wife will be
joining me in the second portionof the show, because a lover's
episode without the one that Ilove just don't make no sense.
It's not sense-a-cool America.

(07:00):
But before we get into all themushy, ushy, gushy good stuff, I
have a full frontalconfessional with you.
That has got me pretty dangnear pissed off.
Okay, little Bucky, I was justchanneling my inner southern

(07:21):
grandpa right there with that.
I don't know what happened, butI'm going to grab my Cabela's
catalog, I'm going to place myleft hand on the catalog and I'm
going to direct these beadylittle eyes to the sky as I
raise my right hand and I repeatbefore you the truth, a full
frontal confessional, the truthfrom this guy.

(07:43):
I'm pretty embarrassed.
I'm pretty embarrassed.
I'm pretty ticked off.
I don't find it amusing One bit, but I'm pretty confident y'all
are going to find this shitfunny.
Here's a little screenshot intothe life and times of moi.
Here's a little preview, alittle peeling of the onion, if

(08:06):
you will, as to my life and myluck and how they both often
suck.
God.
Here's the deal, as previouslyrecorded multiple times.
Here we are in the middle ofSnowmageddon.
Okay, every 24 to 48 hourswe're going to get dumped on

(08:27):
with that white gold.
Okay, I used to call it whitegold back in the day when I was
selling snowmobiles, becausethat's how you sold snowmobiles.
Is it needed to be snowing?
And for the people out therethat you know are having plow
contracts and they're, you know,getting all that overtime and
all those extra side gigs andjobs?
Or to my brother from anothermother out there, mr DCF Darren

(08:49):
Clark Finnegan, who's a proudowner of Lost Valley Brewing
Company that just happens to belocated on a freaking ski
mountain when the snow falls,that's white gold.
Snow falls, that's white gold.
But to those of us trying towork from home and raise a
newborn and avoid spending fourand five hours a day on the

(09:12):
tractor, it's no longer whitegold, it's the white curse.
Right now, I mean, I don't hateit, I'm a Mainer, it is what it
is, but it takes a lot of time,and you heard me rant and rave
about this already.
I don't need to.
I don't need to keep going downthis path here.
I'm just trying to tell you.
It's contained here, all right.
So here's the thing Saturday Ihave to go out and get some

(09:36):
sawdust for the horse.
The wife made this connectionwith a fella a couple of towns
away that owns a woodworkingshop and he's trading us some
sawdust just for getting it outof his way.
So we have this schedule now ofshowing up to get sawdust.
This was our first time going.
We didn't know how large thebins were going to be, so we had

(09:57):
to bring the old farm truck.
The four of us loaded up an oldred, the old farm truck, and
we're heading out to get sawduston a Saturday and we're going
to get ourselves some coffee andI'm going to go to work and the
three of them are going to goon their merry way doing
whatever it is they wish to dotoday.
Now, on the way to saidwoodworking shop, some lady in

(10:18):
front of me decides to throw thebrakes on long before throwing
said blinker on.
Okay, I ram-jam-cram the brakesto the floor here and as I do,
I realize we ain't stopping.
No, we are not stopping, we'reslowing.
We're gradually slowing.
We are decreasing speeds, butnot at a rapid rate.

(10:40):
Okay, we are not stopping fastenough.
I cut the wheel to yard it togo out around said left-hand
lady here.
Thankfully she turned as I'mgoing around, tragedy avoided.
But I quickly realized we don'thave any brakes.
No brakes, bobby, we ain't gotno brakes, which it's happened

(11:02):
many times before.
Right, this is an old girl of atruck.
Okay, actually, last time welost brakes, the wife had a
camper attached to it.
Thankfully we were close tohome.
So we are proceeding to, uh,this wood shop here and I'm
leaving a mile in between me andthe next vehicle and hoping
nobody just tries to come out infront of me.

(11:23):
And it's one of those thingswhere I'm just pushing it all
the way to the floor and we areslowly grabbing some brakes.
So maybe the front brakes wereslowly catching on a little bit.
And I make the announcementlisten, hold on, because if
something happens in anemergency I'm probably going to
have to throw this sumbitch inpark and we're probably going to

(11:44):
lose the rear end out of thisold girl.
But we get to the sawmill, getthe wood sawdust, whatever, load
it all up.
We're heading home.
We're kind of trying to bebopour way around traffic to get
home without breaks.
We get home.
I parked the truck and I say,screw it, I'm not even going to
look at it.
I don't have the patience northe time.

(12:04):
I got all these projects to do,work stacking up.
I got to get to the office.
They head off to get coffee.
We had to take that off thescript because I just got no
damn breaks right.
So here we go, blew the brakesout of the truck again, park it,
leave it, set it and forget it.
Okay, Next day, super BowlSunday we're getting pounded
with snow, starts snowingovernight.

(12:26):
You wake up on Sunday morning to, I'm going to say, 10, 12
inches of snow.
We've got a nice dumping of thewhite gold.
Okay, well, got to get outthere with the tractor and start
making some things happen.
So I'm cranking down thedriveway.
Everything is going nice andsmooth.
Get things cranked out.

(12:46):
I'm feeling real good about howwell things are going.
I only have right in front ofthe garage and the house to do
and I like to do a couple ofpasses up our little farm road
on the way to the horse barn.
This makes it easier to get hayin and out and grain in and out
, whatever.
So while I'm doing that I'mkind of pushing some snow banks

(13:08):
back and I'm backing up and Ifall off of the road.
So the road kind of dips off,but the snow banks and
everything are so high youreally can't tell where you are.
So as I'm backing up, I justslowly slip off the road and
typically I can get out of thisscenario.
So I'm taking the bucket andI'm trying to work myself out.
I can't seem to do it.

(13:28):
I'm using the backhoe in theback to try to prop myself up
and it seems like I'm kind of atan angle here or I'm just going
to end up rolling this son of abitch.
So before I make it worse and Iget my wife to come out yelling
at me that I made it worse andI should have stopped way sooner
.
I decide, hey, let's stop waysooner.

(13:49):
So I jump off the tractor,message the wife hey, can you
come out and give me a hand andpull me out?
Now here's the situation at hand.
I've only made one pass downthis road 12 inches of snow
Vehicles currently on thepremises.
Road, 12 inches of snowVehicles currently on the
premises.
School bus ain't even going tofit, don't even think about it.
Dodge Challenger in the garageDon't even think about it.

(14:12):
Wifey's Kia Sorento.
I do not want to be responsiblefor ripping the back of my
wife's car off of my tractor.
Not going to happen.
My dad's old pickup truck longbed, v6, two wheel drive.
I'm thinking I don't want tohave two vehicles stuck in the

(14:33):
same spot.
Not going to happen.
We'll have to take all red.
I know she ain't got brakes.
Here's a scenario I can't pullfrom the side because I'm going
to end up rolling the tractor,so I have to get out in front of
it and back up to it.
Now I do have a big snow pilethere, so, as the truck will be

(14:53):
pulling the tractor out if itdoesn't stop, if it can't stop,
you can just bounce into thesnow bank and it will stop and I
can stop the tractor, unhook itand call it good.
Everything about that makessense.
What I didn't plan for wasbacking up to the tractor.
Oh Lord, have mercy.
Lord, lord, lord, have mercy.

(15:14):
I get in the truck, I startbacking up and I don't want to
get too close to the tractor.
Before I start applying brakes,I'm switching over to the brake
.
I'm not stopping, I'm slidingand I'm throwing my feet around.
Like am I on the freaking brakeright now?
I've got sweatpants on.
I've got a bib on like the fullonesie jumpsuit.

(15:36):
Basically, here that thatfreaking, I don't know Carhartt
jumpers big snow boots on.
I'm looking around trying tomake sure I'm not on the gas.
I'm fucking flipping all around, sorry, lord.
Boots on.
I'm looking around trying tomake sure I'm not on the gas.
I'm fucking flipping all around.
Sorry, lord, I apologize, Iswore right back there, but I'm
getting heated already.
Hope you can feel it comingthrough the speakers At this
point.
I didn't realize nor account forthe fact that my tractor slid

(15:59):
off the road, fell kind of downin a hole.
What does that tell you?
My tractor slid off the road,fell kind of down in a hole.
What does that tell you?
My tractor slid off the road.
That should tell you my truck,without brakes, is likely to
slip off the road.
What I probably should havedone is lifted the bucket on the
tractor up enough that, if thetruck kept going, it would have

(16:21):
just run into the freakingbucket and stopped.
But no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
I left that down, creating afreaking ramp slash catapult for
the pickup truck.
All right, as I'm slidingdownhill into the tractor, foot
crammed on the brakes, trying tolook back, noticing that, hey,

(16:42):
you are just going to smashright into your tractor and then
you were probably going tomonster truck, grave digger, big
foot your ass all the way upover the top of this tractor and
destroy it.
That's what's going to happen.
Old Red, rolling on some 32s,is going to crush your brand new
tractor.
So what do I do?

(17:03):
Instead of throwing it in parkbecause I was fearful of the
fact that it might just stop ontop of the tractor, I slam it
down into gear and I hit thethrottle.
I drop it in gear, cram, jamthe gears so that I can stop it
from sliding in reverse andlaunch that sucker out before I
run over the tractor.

(17:24):
What I didn't see at this momentin time was that the bumper of
my truck had actually gone upover the bucket and hooked onto
the tractor.
So when it did, my tailgate andbumper hooked onto the bucket,
damn near, ripped my tailgateoff but in the meantime blew the
bucket shock off of the leftside, so the actual like bucket

(17:47):
cylinder.
It literally ripped the weldsright off the cylinder.
So my lines don't look broken,but it took the threads on the
little metal like nipple that'swelded onto my cylinder and
snapped it right off.
At this time I can't even seethe tractor.

(18:08):
I just fire the truck forward,slam it into the snow bank, drop
it in park and jump out to hearmy wife running up the frigging
driveway yelling at me,screaming at the top of her
lungs what?

Speaker 2 (18:21):
the fuck are you doing?

Speaker 1 (18:23):
And at that moment I realized, huh, that reminds me a
lot of my dad, for two reasons.
Number one, when I was a kidand I did dumb shit scratch that
Up until two years ago.
Doing dumb shit up untilscratch that.
A year ago, when I lost my dad,if I did something dumb, my dad
would have yelled at me whatthe fuck are you doing?

(18:44):
Also, if I found my dad doingsomething dumb, like being stuck
off the side of the freakinglawn which one of the last times
I actually yelled at my dad, heburied the plow truck off the
side of the road I hooked onwith my truck and towed him
halfway across the yard afteryelling what the fuck are you
doing?
Because he smashed into mytruck with his plow truck.

(19:05):
Well, yeah.
So the first thing I realizedis wow, this reminds me of my
dad, both him yelling at me orme yelling at him.
And then I quickly realized huh, that was never really helpful.
Yeah, still isn't.
I go back to the tractor.
I'm looking, I can see thebumper of the truck is just

(19:26):
ripped right to shreds.
And I look at the tractor andit is just shooting hydraulic
fluid all over the place.
After some quick appraisals.
Here it appears to be.
It is just the bucket cylinderthat I've destroyed.
Lines look good, no real crazycosmetic damage, some scratches
and areas that I probably wouldhave scratched in due time

(19:48):
anyway.
So my cousin came over, we tookthe actual hydraulic cylinder
off and then I spent all Sundaytrying to track down an
aftermarket option.
But the bummer in all of thisis that my tractor is so new and
it's one of the newer uh likesub compact tractors.

(20:09):
It's not really big.
So there's really noaftermarket companies making
these uh replacement parts forthese.
So I found an aftermarketcompany that would make one
literally twice the size of whatI actually need and they would
make it for 180 bucks andthey're in New Jersey.
I'd have it in a couple of days.
But the bummer is they don'tmake anything my size.

(20:31):
So on Monday morning I calledthe manufacturer.
I called the shop where Ibought the tractor.
They looked into it and theywant $470.
$470 for this hydrauliccylinder that I literally just
broke the damn nipple off of,when I can find a upgraded, much

(20:52):
bigger, much better, strongerversion for $180, that right
there chaps my ass.
So I found a hydraulic repairshop in Gorham and I drove it
out there and they're going totake it apart, drill it out, put
it back on, kind of reweld itand set me back up and hopefully
, when I get that back, I canreattach it to the tractor,

(21:13):
re-hook up all the hydraulics,cross my fingers and pray that
we're good to go.
So, with all that said, I don'tknow what it's going to cost me
.
I don't know when it's going tobe done.
I literally begged them to tryto get it to me before the next
few storms, because we are dueto get another six inches on
Thursday and they're talkingabout a possible 16 or 18 inches

(21:33):
over the freaking weekend.
Good God, almighty, where's theTylenol Shit Gut check?

Speaker 2 (21:58):
All right, all right, all right, all right, yeah,
alright, alright, alright.

Speaker 1 (22:04):
Alright, y'all see, y'all heard that delay right
there and you thought for surethat my beautiful bride decided
to not join me on the loversepisode.
That's what you thought, admitit.
Admit it.
You thought I was going to dothis whole show by myself, you

(22:24):
wish Well, I appreciate youjoining, dear, and if you don't
stop fidgeting, looking forthings over there, I'm going to
snap, because you my.
Can you hear it?

Speaker 2 (22:36):
No, I can't hear nothing, but I can see you and
you're starting to make me likeitch Like my itch today because
I needed gum really bad yeah,well, here's.

Speaker 1 (22:47):
Here's the insights to a relationship.
Okay, right now my wife isholding the baby.
She's sleeping.
We're trying to finish off thisportion of the podcast, as
promised.
Here we are to deliver.
Um, she's trying to keep littlebusy, rain, quiet and sleeping.
But you've lost something inthe couch so you are fidgeting
and moving things and it'sstarting to legitimately cause a

(23:10):
tick in my brain like I'm gonnasnap don't bring balin into
this yeah, I didn't mean that.

Speaker 2 (23:17):
And then earlier today you messaged me what
please bring me some gum,because I'm having withdrawals
from gum g u m I have anaddiction y'all, and you know
it's not a very expensiveaddiction I mean, it can be
besides my shoe addiction and mypurse addiction and my cowboy

(23:40):
boot addiction.
No, this one is not veryexpensive, but it is an
addiction.
I constantly need gum, gum, gum, all the time, like I feel,
like I'm fiending if I do nothave gum.
And so you were coming to myoffice today anyway.
So I said please, for the loveof God, actually for the love of

(24:02):
gum get me a pack out of thesnack drawer.

Speaker 1 (24:06):
And then, when you were about to leave, I said,
texted you don't forget my gumyeah, when you were going over
your addictions you said shoo,and it sounded like chew and I
was like thank god you don't.
You don't shoot a backy like myold man did.
Good Lord, which is like 20bucks a pouch now.

Speaker 2 (24:24):
I tried pouches one time because the boys were doing
it.

Speaker 1 (24:29):
Like those little like.

Speaker 2 (24:30):
Isn't that what they're called?

Speaker 1 (24:31):
Oh, those ones are stupid.

Speaker 2 (24:33):
Do you stick them in your lip, my?

Speaker 1 (24:34):
old man's pouch was like a pouch of cut tobacco.
No, no, I'm just saying I tried, yeah little snuff, patch
things.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's enough patchthings yeah.

Speaker 2 (24:39):
Yeah, One time and I was like I don't even know what
the heck I'm doing, it tastedlike donkey ass it's awful.

Speaker 1 (24:46):
I was in high school.
I was volunteering to measurefor the track team.
So our football coaches a lotof them, were track and field
coaches, so one of them had meout there measuring distances on
discus and shot put and stuffand he was like, hey, big dog,
you want to keep yourself busy?
And he gives me a, takes a likea skull can.

Speaker 2 (25:09):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (25:09):
And he's like go ahead and pack yourself a lipper
while you're out here.
This is, like you know,football coaches.

Speaker 2 (25:15):
Right.

Speaker 1 (25:15):
I'm in high school, probably 14, 15.
I don't know.

Speaker 2 (25:20):
My coach is like here's awfully young to be in
high school.
I started high school when Iwas like 13 years old.

Speaker 1 (25:28):
I graduated before turning 18.
You're talking to a prodigyright here.

Speaker 2 (25:34):
Most kids are going into high school like sweet 16,
15, 16 years old.

Speaker 1 (25:41):
I don't know the dimensions on this one here, but
I started high school at like13.
I graduated high school when Iwas 17.
I went the whole summer afterhigh school before turning 18
anyways.

Speaker 2 (25:56):
Good Lord.

Speaker 1 (25:58):
So you're dealing with a prodigy right there
sleeping.
She's going to be just gifted.

Speaker 2 (26:03):
Were you in like academic honors or something you
out of school quickly, like youjust aced out of it.

Speaker 1 (26:10):
My mom just didn't want me at home anymore.
The funny thing is, one of mybest friends is like four days
younger than me.
So me and Dave both the samescenario.
We were the youngins.
What was I even talking about?
Oh, can you think about this?

Speaker 2 (26:24):
day and age.

Speaker 1 (26:25):
A high school football coach throwing a 13,
14-year-old a skull.
Can and being like here, goahead pack yourself a lipper.
And then fast forward to thefact that I never stopped
talking and I'm in a fieldsweating because it's track and
field and I'm measuring stuffand I'm pounding Gatorade in
water.
What do you think happened?

Speaker 2 (26:44):
Ooh, you swallowed it .
Yeah, swallowed all of it.

Speaker 1 (26:47):
Next thing, you know, fast forward to me being in the
woods at the high schoolthrowing up violently everywhere
.

Speaker 2 (26:53):
Oh, I bet, oh, I bet.

Speaker 1 (26:55):
This is not the story that I wanted to start our
lovers podcast with, but Forsome reason, that's not where I
thought you were going at all.

Speaker 2 (27:03):
What's forever?
I literally pictured your dadlike, and how he used to spit
his tobacco and you startedtalking about like, measuring
distance and, for whateverreason, my mind went left field
and was like hey, boy, mark ithere no, that would make sense,
but that would be something yourdad would have done it makes
sense.

Speaker 1 (27:21):
so oddly, anyway, this isn't how you would
prescribe starting a lover'spodcast, but, truth be told,
this really is.

Speaker 2 (27:30):
This is us right.
This is real raw you leavenothing off limits.

Speaker 1 (27:34):
No, have conversations that you wouldn't
want to have at all times.
Whether it's about how big of ashit somebody took right, it
doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter if it's catchand release on a turd.

Speaker 2 (27:45):
Did you say that because the dog was just
squatting taking your shit onthe TV?
No, that's pretty funny.

Speaker 1 (27:49):
I'm just trying to think of things that nobody
wants to talk about, but that'sthe point.
You need to be comfortable insharing all those things.
I feel like I know friends'relationships where my buddy
would say something to me andlike enjoy himself joking,
having like guys talk, but itwould never go home and say it
to the wife.
You know what I mean?
Yeah, and I feel like somepeople go to work and they

(28:10):
release and they are themselvesat work and they go home and
they're not like they're afraidto say those things.

Speaker 2 (28:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (28:16):
And I don't want to live in a world like that.

Speaker 2 (28:24):
You have to be able to just kind of uncork it and
let it fly.
You have to be uncomfortablewith having uncomfortable
conversations.
That doesn't necessarily haveto be like your relationship,
having like a money talk or, uh,talk about like your feelings
or anything like.
It has to be like talking aboutuncomfortable things, like I
just took the biggest deuce,caboose which nobody in the free
world right now is thinking oh,what a lover's podcast.

(28:47):
Husband and wife talking abouttaking poops Listen you got to
be comfortable and I'm notsaying this is like we're using
examples here people, you haveto be comfortable my wife
doesn't poop.
I shit like a trucker.

Speaker 1 (29:02):
Okay, that's enough.
Good Lord.

Speaker 2 (29:06):
If we're going to continue these poop
conversations, you got to behonest.

Speaker 1 (29:09):
One of the greatest poop stories of all.
I mean, I have some amazingpoop stories but we're not here
to share those.
I'll add a further date, but Ijust thought of this with our
little banter back and forth.
Finnegan, when he used to workfor me, he was telling me how he
had his septic pumped one time.

Speaker 2 (29:23):
Oh God.

Speaker 1 (29:24):
And the guy showed up and was pumping his septic and
it smelled like awful right, ofcourse.
You know the whole cul-de-sac'scoming out to look Someone's
getting their septic pumped,whatever, clark looks over at
the guy and the guy looks at himand goes, oh don't worry.
Just saying you that's a greatline.
I don, mentally, I'm notfeeling okay Having those

(30:09):
conversations.
You and me have had to haveextremely uncomfortable
conversations leading up to thebirth of Little Paisley Reign,
navigating those waters Afterthat we've had countless
difficult conversations nowtrying to operate the business
work from home, stay at homestuff, all those different
things.
Like I see you enjoying ElonMusk and Little X.

Speaker 2 (30:28):
Well, I don't know what Little X just said, but he
literally just covered his mouthand was like whoa, whoa, whoa.

Speaker 1 (30:33):
Oh, he just interrupted the whole program.
He had this little chain on andstuff.
It was pretty funny.
It's hilarious, he was climbingon his shoulders and stuff.
People that are listening rightnow have no clue that you're
watching news with the sound offin the background, and I've
already seen it, so I can recap,but it's almost like we have
this ESP finishing each other'ssentences.

Speaker 2 (30:55):
Yes, we do have that.
I can give you the look.

Speaker 1 (30:59):
Yeah, but normalize having conversations that might
seem uncomfortable, whether it'sa gross conversation or a
sensitive conversation,normalize those things.
So I don't even plan on havingthat as our um, you know, little
tips, tricks, techniques typeof scenario.
There.
They just kind of happennaturally.

(31:19):
That's what I love about this,that was natural yeah, just like
pooping, it's natural it'snatural.
It's natural, everybody does it, shit happens.

Speaker 2 (31:26):
I mean, we've talked about it in the past and I think
that it's important to kind ofrecap again.
It's like, you know, beingcomfortable with having those
uncomfortable conversations,like before we learn to be each
other's husband, wife, boyfriend, girlfriend, fiancé, that sort
of thing.
We learned to be each other'sbest friend and that's where we
got comfortable with havingthose uncomfortable
conversations, because you,openly, can have those

(31:49):
conversations with your bestfriend, you can be real raw and
honest and you know that there'sno judgment there.
Like I think that that'simportant is like and even if,
like, you're in a roughsituation, like, like an
uncomfortable situation in yourrelationship, just taking it
back to like all right, if thiswas my best friend, maybe you

(32:12):
and your partner are not bestfriends yet, maybe you're in the
stage of getting there, ormaybe you're hitting a rough
patch and you're like all right,let me start from scratch, let
me learn to be their best friend.
Again, you know what I mean.
Just like.
Let me learn like.
Not that you forget who theperson is, but maybe you get
just stuck in day-to-day lifelike work, work, work.

Speaker 1 (32:35):
Come home, do the same thing just the roller
coaster of life and you losetouch with things, or you just
take those that are closest toyou for granted.

Speaker 2 (32:43):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (32:43):
I mean it's easier to not work as hard on the things
that you feel like at some pointyou're entitled to.
You know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (32:51):
Absolutely.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
And spoiler alert people, we all get old.
We don't all age, gracefully.
There's going to come a pointin time in life where you might
look like shit, you might feellike shit and you might shit
yourself.
Right, you want somebody thatyou're going to feel comfortable
with and that you're going tolook across the couch and
remember all the things you'vebeen through and still love that

(33:13):
person.
Right, I mean, you got to thinkabout those things.

Speaker 2 (33:15):
Even if I look like this.

Speaker 1 (33:17):
Yeah, Dougie Spoons Well.
My eyes crossed my tongue outthose conversations that you
don't want to have.
Much like having to call yourwife and say, hey, can you come
tow me out?
I just got the tractor stuck toyou arriving, asking me what
the F I'm doing.

Speaker 2 (33:36):
That's not really how it happened, but we'll save
them the drama.

Speaker 1 (33:41):
Oh, they heard the drama I vented earlier.
But the point is you got to becomfortable enough to have those
conversations, whether you'reyelling and screaming and
swearing at each other.
You got to brush them off later.
You know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (33:52):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:55):
Well, on that blushing, beautiful note, let's
get on to what was scheduled.
Do you know, as this podcastepisode is dropping on the eve
of Lovers' Day, St Valentine'sDay, do you know where
Valentine's Day really came from?

Speaker 2 (34:12):
Did it come from Cupid?
You know the grown-ass man in adiaper shooting people with
arrows, which is probably highlyillegal.
Yeah, that would make a lot ofsense.
Is probably highly illegal.

Speaker 1 (34:21):
Yeah, that would make a lot of sense.
I did some research because Ialways knew that it came from
Saint Valentine or Valentine,and I remember this story from
school.
But I wanted to dig into itbecause, like most things, I
learned, I forgot them.
Okay, it just kind of happensyou get old and you forget
everything.
Valentine's Day is named afterSaint Valentine, a Catholic

(34:42):
priest who lived in Rome in the3rd century.
There are many stories aboutSaint Valentine, and over time
these stories grew into thelegend that we know today.
At the time of Valentine's life, many Romans were converting to
Christianity, but the Emperor,claudius II was a pagan and
created strict laws aboutChristians and what they were

(35:04):
allowed to do.
Claudius believed that Romansoldiers should be completely
devoted to Rome and thereforepassed laws preventing them from
marrying.
St Valentine began to marrythese soldiers in super-secret
Christian ceremonies, and thiswas the beginning of his
reputation for believing in theimportance of love.

(35:24):
Eventually, valentine was foundout and jailed for his crimes
against Claudius.
While in prison, valentinecared for his fellow prisoners
and also his jailer's blinddaughter.
Legend has it that Valentinecured the girl's blindness and
that his final act before beingexecuted was to write her a love

(35:46):
message signed from yourValentine.
Valentine was executed on the14th of February in the year 270
.
Isn't that crazy.

Speaker 2 (35:59):
Wow, that is crazy.
Well, my Valentine you havebeen my Valentine for the last
10 years and I have a questionfor you.
Okay, will you be my Valentine?
Yeah, aw, yeah, you haven'tasked me to be your Valentine,
so I figured.

Speaker 1 (36:13):
I'd jump the gun here .
It's a good time.

Speaker 2 (36:16):
I have a fun fact for you.
You probably don't know thisand I don't know how I know this
knowledge, and I don't know howI know this knowledge, but in
two years, Valentine's Day fallson the Super Bowl.

Speaker 1 (36:30):
Really yes, wow, that's impressive.

Speaker 2 (36:37):
You took my car to work and you left it on the
sports channel.

Speaker 1 (36:40):
Oh Wow, bravo, they were talking about it, so're
trying to get in my pants.

Speaker 2 (36:46):
You left the sports channel on, so I listened to it
all the way to work and theywere talking about the super
bowl and valentine's impressivehuh and then I happened to
scroll on the uh social web andI saw a bunch of people posting
that they already hated theirhusband because Super Bowl was
going to take over Valentine'sDay.

Speaker 1 (37:04):
And I was like listen .

Speaker 2 (37:07):
I get snacks and food .

Speaker 1 (37:08):
I'm not mad at all.
Some of the best Valentine'ssnacks you're going to get.

Speaker 2 (37:12):
Yeah, right there and there.
I'm not mad about it, I'm madabout it.

Speaker 1 (37:15):
So, as we prepare for this continued lovers
conversation, I was thinkingabout it and the relationship
episodes of the podcast havealways been some of our most
requested episodes.
Okay, and I don't know.
The uh funny thing is we haveuh so many people that we've met

(37:40):
in our lives that will send arandom message to you or have a
conversation that saysrelationship goals, like I see
you guys, it's my relationshipgoal, this is what I'm looking
for, and we don't feel like it'sall that special, like this
just feels normal to us, but forsome people this just feels

(38:01):
right.
Yeah, and for some people itjust seems, I don't know, like
something that's unattainable.
For some people this just feelsright.

Speaker 2 (38:04):
Yeah, and for some people it just seems, um, I
don't know, like somethingthat's unattainable for some
reason right I think what I geta lot from people is not
necessarily like like you'vetalked about it in previous
episodes, about like the filtersthat you see on social media,
but people see that out inpublic when we're out together
as well.
So it's not like like you seeus on social media lovey dovey

(38:28):
on each other, but you also seethe same people um out in public
.
True, so like they we're notsugarcoating it like on social
media, like this is just us real, raw and honest.

Speaker 1 (38:40):
And the truth is is that what we have isn't easy and
what we have isn't perfect, andwe can bicker and you know and
argue and work through thingsall the time, but the point is
that you know, if you have thesame goal and and each other's
interests in mind and you sharea common respect and core values
, and you're going to workthrough those things.
Nothing's easy.
This relationship isn't easy.

(39:01):
Some people that might seem orfeel unattainable, but it isn't.
It's very, very easy to attainif you are willing to work for
it and find somebody that issharing those beliefs and are
willing to work towards it andthrough it with you as well.
I also like the fact that youjust mentioned previous episodes
and I don't think that you knowor obviously I know you don't

(39:24):
know because I just took thesenotes in the office.
You have no clue where we wereheaded today.

Speaker 2 (39:30):
No, I was feeding our baby.

Speaker 1 (39:32):
I went back and pulled up some of our previous
episodes.
I'm not going to rehash all ofthem here and I don't want to
just totally repeat an entireepisode, so I just kind of
wanted to highlight three of ourrelationship episodes for
people to go back to, becauseone of the beautiful things
about our podcast is it lives onforever.
You can find it atShedstrugglepodcastcom all major

(39:54):
platforms as well.
But if you go back to episode84, it takes self-love and
acceptance to find happiness.
Learn to love yourself and takeaccountability for your share
of failed relationships.
Doing so will build thenecessary self-esteem and
confidence to dust off yourfeelings and try again.

(40:14):
Episode 84, do you rememberthat one Take self-love and
acceptance to find happiness?
I think those are some values,just some lessons that we can
all number one, go back to theepisode and listen to again.
But the whole notion of youcan't love somebody else until
you love yourself.
That might sound rathercliche-ish, but it is absolutely
true.
You need to value yourself andto love yourself, because you

(40:38):
can't transfer love to anybodyelse if you're constantly
downplaying yourself.
You need to believe in yourself, love yourself and appreciate
yourself before you canappreciate anybody else.
I think my favoriterelationship episode that we
have goes all the way back toepisode 33 relationship
essentials, uncomfortableconversations and shared values

(41:02):
the importance of shared values,describing them as the super
glue of all relationships,emphasizing that couples must
share similar values or theywill live with resentment.
That episode might have beenone of our most controversial
because we talked about the factthat if we don't believe in

(41:23):
some of the same things, then Idon't think that we should be
together, because if we don'tbelieve in those things and one
of us is constantly working forsomething that somebody else
does not believe in, then you'rejust setting yourself up for
utter disappointment and failure.
Failure, difficulty in thefuture, and that if you share
those common values, then you'regoing to work through difficult

(41:44):
situations because you're bothbound by those values.
I really love episode 33.
And the episode right beforethat was actually our first ever
relationship episode and it wasnumber 32, the Importance of
Communication and Relationships.
I think we just kind of touchedon it a little bit just a few
minutes ago.
But that episode, the premiseof it, is that effective

(42:05):
communication starts withexcellent listening.
Everyone wants to be heard,eliminate distractions and
dedicate your attention to yourpartner.
Those three episodes 32, 33,and 84, three great relationship
episodes, those little snippetsthat I just gave you about
those episodes.
Remember those and think aboutthose, because today I'm excited

(42:29):
to share some research from acelebrity, high-end, high-paid
matchmaker that is going to backup the things that we've been
saying for years.
I'm stoked about it.
So my plan for today's episode,number one, is like we've been
doing talking to all the loversin the room, all those that are

(42:52):
already in committedrelationships.
If you're working throughsomething, if you're going
through something, if you'reworking through something, if
you're going through something,if you're growing through
something, us expressing to youto get comfortable with being
uncomfortable, there's going tocome a point where those
uncomfortable conversationsbecome comfortable.
Also, reminding you guys to goback to those other episodes.
Find some clues that are there.
But I didn't want today's showto be entirely about people that

(43:16):
are already in relationships.
We have a lot of singlePringles out there.
We have a lot of people in ourlife that are close to us, that
are out there trying to findlove, trying to find L-O-V-E,
and we want to provide someglimmers of hope for them.
So I found some research from acelebrity matchmaker.
I was actually watching the newsthe other day research from a

(43:36):
celebrity matchmaker.
I was actually watching thenews the other day.
You and me saw this lady onthere talking about the top
dating trends for 2025 and asurprising turn towards how
people are finding lovers andhow they're going out and
finding matches and startingrelationships.
So, before we get into thearticle the number one, most

(43:57):
surprising dating trend to lookfor in 2025, before we get into
that, I was doing some otherresearch and I found some people
that answered all these surveysand they were talking about or
surveying people that are inrelationships for, like their
second marriage, the thirdmarriage, they've gone through

(44:19):
some trial and error and theyasked those people on their
second marriage, on their thirdmarriage, what happened?
What did you see as the numberone mistake?
For the reason why that firstmarriage didn't work, why you
had to go out and try again tofind actual love?
The number one answer that allthose folks gave was be together

(44:42):
for the right reasons.
By far the most common answerwas being with the person for
the wrong reasons.
That's why marriages andrelationships failed, and some
of the reasons that theyincluded, to be specific, were
pressure from friends and familyfeeling like a loser because
they were single and settlingfor the first person that came

(45:03):
along, being together for theimage of it, because the
relationship looked good onpaper or on social media, not
because the two people actuallyadmired each other and being
young and naive and hopelesslyin love and thinking that love
would solve everything.
I think all those examplesright there would identify

(45:24):
reasons for the breakups in mostof my relationships, right.
But if you think about thesemarriages and when you start
having friends that you've knownfor a long time get divorces,
talk to them and then realizethat they've been hiding their
true feelings, a lot of thosethings are slammed right in here
.
I'm always surprised to hearfrom somebody that's like man.
I just felt like a freakingloser.

(45:45):
Everybody around me was in arelationship, so I just kind of
jumped into the freshrelationship and I never really
got to know that person.
And the next thing, you know,we were getting married, you
know, or just because everybodythought it was the right fit, we
looked together, you know, Idon't know.
Just everybody trying to liveup to the joneses, the social
media, you know, filter fueledobsession with this person just

(46:09):
looks like a good partner for me.
So I'm going to accept the factthat they treat me like shit
and just get along with it, thatwhole chestnut?
Oh Well, hello peanut.

Speaker 2 (46:20):
Hello, Is this thing on?
She does.

Speaker 1 (46:23):
Are you here to join the conversation?

Speaker 2 (46:26):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (46:27):
It is because of L-O-V-E that you exist, little
darling.
Yes, that is correct, I don'tthink I can record with you
smiling like that at me fromover there.

Speaker 2 (46:38):
So if y'all hear some grunting, no, it's not me over
here trying to take a poop.
It's Miss Thang over hereplaying with a teething ring.
All right, we're going to trythis.

Speaker 1 (46:49):
Because this is a lover's relationship.
It's a little give and takehere and we're going to try to
work through this with littleMiss Paisley Rain, but when you
start freaking out, Daddy'sgoing to have to stop.
Can you hold in there?

Speaker 2 (47:03):
Let's see.

Speaker 1 (47:04):
Okay, we'll see All that out the way.
Let's get on to the research,because if I don't get moving,
someone's going to yell at me toget moving.
So I found this article I thinkit was on Parade, something I
don't know, some website news,something.
I saw it on Fox News.
To begin with, www, www, lookit up the number one most

(47:28):
surprising dating trend to lookfor in 2025, according to a
celebrity matchmaker.
I'm going to read through this.
There's just some stuff in here.
When you want to interject withsome of your own notes, that's
how we're going to treat this,all right.

Speaker 2 (47:40):
Okay.

Speaker 1 (47:40):
You ready?
Nothing crazy here.
Nothing crazy.
Couple of quick things,celebrity matchmaker,
relationship therapist, drChristy Keterin, I think, but I
can't barely read, so If if youchat about the current dating
scene with a single person, youmight hear sentiments like I'm
in the trenches or it's hell outthere.

(48:02):
Dating is what you make it, butthere are so many dating trends
and toxic habits that certainpeople get into, like ghosting
or not communicating whatthey're actually looking for,
that can make it hard to find agenuine connection.

Speaker 2 (48:18):
I think that's a big one right.
So in other words, dating islike Marketplace on Facebook.

Speaker 1 (48:23):
Yeah, Same thing.
I guess you're using likeMarketplace apps really.

Speaker 2 (48:26):
It's like it's a combination of Marketplace and a
meat counter.
You're being ghosted and you'renot telling them what you want.

Speaker 1 (48:32):
That makes a lot of sense.
That makes a lot of sense whatyou want like that makes a lot
of sense.

Speaker 2 (48:37):
That makes a lot of sense, I mean, if you think
about it.
And I have a love-haterelationship with marketplace.
Yeah, I'm out of that.

Speaker 1 (48:39):
I love to hate it, yeah when I was a kid, like if
you go back to like your earlyrelationships, I think a lot of
like heartbreak and letdownshappen because the person that
you thought was like interestedin you, that's they weren't
interested in.
Yeah, at least from a guy'sperspective that's like a big
thing, like, yeah, at least froma guy's perspective, that's
like a big thing.
Like you, you landed in thefriend zone too quickly, that

(49:01):
whole blurred line there.
I think if those things wereput out early, a lot of
heartache would be would besaved.

Speaker 2 (49:07):
Yeah, I think the hardest thing for like.
For me, if I think back to it,is like you started dating this
person and then that personwasn't who they painted this
picture to be like.
When they say like thehoneymoon stage is over, like
that's what they meant it, likethat's yeah, you know what I
mean, like because that personstarted to be somebody else or

(49:27):
not even be somebody else.
they were being somebody else atfirst and now their true colors
are showing and you're likethat's not what I signed up for,
you were just trying to impressme.

Speaker 1 (49:35):
Yeah, and I guess that comes right down to like
you know, communicating whatyou're in it for, and I think
the invention of all thesedating sites, aka boom boom
sites.
People are putting theirintentions out there.
This is looking to hook up,right.
And I think people have beenmore accustomed to saying that
that was a lot more of a no, noshun scenario back in our day.
But I think the whole idea ofpeople just putting it out there

(49:59):
like I'm not looking for arelationship, I do think that
that portion of it is healthybecause otherwise you're just
leading people on the wholeghosting scenario.
I remember as a kid being likeoh, you're not allowed to
respond.
For so many days, don't makethe first text Like you went on
a date.
You know what I mean.
For so many days, don't makethe first text Like you went on
a date, don't you know what Imean?
All those pre-prescribed ruleson like oh, you're going to

(50:19):
smother the person if youcommunicate too early, bitch.
No, if I'm interested, I'mgoing to tell you.
I'm not here to be like I gotto wait 48 hours.
I'm only on hour 44.25.
I can't text back now.
I hate that bull.

Speaker 2 (50:34):
Yeah, that was all always crap, Like I was not
really a fan of that.
I mean, let's just be honest.
I kissed you on the first date.
You know, just a shooter's gotto shoot.

Speaker 1 (50:44):
You came right at me.

Speaker 2 (50:45):
Make your move.
Make your move.
Let's ask, let's take a pollfrom the judges.
Do you think he cared?
No, because he's still here.

Speaker 1 (50:54):
Thank you.
He met me like I was aSalisbury steak.

Speaker 2 (50:57):
I'm more of a prime rib kind of girl.

Speaker 1 (50:59):
Yes, I sold myself really short on Salisbury steak.

Speaker 2 (51:01):
Yeah, salisbury steak , I really wanted to say it.

Speaker 1 (51:04):
All.

Speaker 2 (51:04):
right the number one You're more of like a ribeye.

Speaker 1 (51:08):
Thanks.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (51:09):
The number one.
I'm a cowboy steak.
The number one most surprisingdating trend in 2025, according
to Celebrity Matchmaker.
Are you ready?

Speaker 2 (51:19):
I'm ready.

Speaker 1 (51:20):
Dating apps, including niche options like
single parents or seniors.
I'm going to add farmers onlyFarmers only.

Speaker 2 (51:28):
I was just going there.

Speaker 1 (51:30):
Are currently one of the most prominent ways people
meet potential partners.
Prominent ways people meetpotential partners.
A 2023 survey reported thatmore than half of adults under
age 30, 53% have used datingapps and sites, and while a lot
of people find success that way,online dating can be a drag, so
you may be happy to know thatgood old Dr Christine foresees a

(51:54):
different trend springing up in2025.
One of the most surprisingtrends will be the rise, or
shall we say, return, ofcommunity-focused dating.

Speaker 2 (52:06):
I have a question Did you?
Ever go on a dating website.

Speaker 1 (52:10):
Honestly like, I think, dating websites.
I don't think the popularitywas like really there.
Yet I remember at one point Ithink I signed up for like some
freaking Yahoo dating site thingor whatever.
I made like a profile and thenI just had a few creepozoids
actually reached out to me.
It was like no, like didn'tseem like real people.

Speaker 2 (52:32):
The girls and I made like a fake Plenty of fish
account oh, really, yeah, and weset up like fake um, like we
did not use our own pictures.
Katarina was in on this,actually catfishing.
You guys are the first oh yeah,and we said but we would go to
wherever we told them to meet sothat we could see these people.
No good, glad I didn't fall.

Speaker 1 (52:52):
We only did it.

Speaker 2 (52:52):
We only did it, like I think, two times, and then we
felt bad and we just like tooklike, I think, two times, and
then we felt bad and we justlike took, well, the first ones
that came out like the originalones, like I don't remember what
they were called, like it waslong before the boom boom sites,
right long before, like.

Speaker 1 (53:07):
But he always had plenty of fish.
And what's the other ones?

Speaker 2 (53:09):
what are the?
I didn't do them, so I'm not.
What are?

Speaker 1 (53:12):
the other boom, boom ones.
Everybody talks about tinder.
Yeah, okay, that's it, tinderyeah, but um, it was like not,
like was before, like farmersonly and stuff.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
It was like yeah people used to mostly meet in
like chat rooms, and what was itlike?

Speaker 1 (53:27):
cupid, so I don't know what it was one of the very
.
It's like dating on aol.
Okay, it was like early on andit's weird because you think
about the way people go out andactually do try to meet people
through dating apps.
It's kind of crazy to mebecause I've never really had to
experience it, so I think it'skind of.

Speaker 2 (53:44):
I would not in my like.
I'm just putting this out onthe record.
If you decide to leave my ass,I am.
We're just going to have abunch of animals and I'm not
dating in this world.
Not happening, not happening.

Speaker 1 (53:58):
Not happening.
Good news.
According to the doctor, theonline dating apps are starting
to take a backseat.
As more people seek deeper,more meaningful connections,
there will be a shift towardsdating.
That involves wait for itshared social and community
activities.

(54:18):
More people are going to meettheir significant other this
year at volunteer events, churchcommunities, neighborhood get
togethers and maybe evencommunal cooking class.
The point here, folks, that I'mgoing to interject and make
right here if you want to meetsomebody and I said this at the
beginning of the episode, allthe way, right in the very

(54:38):
beginning of this, in thecredits I said single Pringles
I'm going to release to you thesuper secret, the insight on
where the other singles are, howyou're going to meet your
actual interest, your actualpotential soulmate.
You're going to meet thatperson if you just get yourself
out of your box, get yourselfoff the couch, out of the

(55:02):
comfort zone and shocker do moreof the things that you love to
do.
If you're doing what you loveto do, by default, eventually
you're going to find somebodydoing the things that you love
to do.
And here's the thing, folks,shocker, you're already
interested in the same things.

(55:23):
That right, there is already acore value.
You're starting to build corevalues.
So by being out there doing thethings that you already love to
do, you're going to increasethe rate and likelihood of which
you might meet somebody that isalready interested in the
things that you're interested in.
But the other benefit in thisis the fact that you're doing

(55:46):
things you love.
So what does that result in?
You being happier and thelikelihood of meeting somebody
and receiving that gift when youare more of a positive light
because you're doing things thatmake you positive.
That seems like a win-win to me.
Getting back to the researchhere, this trend moves away from
the isolated swipe based datingapps and towards building

(56:10):
connections in real worldsettings.
It's surprising because itreintroduces the idea of dating
within a broader social context,something that's been missing
in recent years.
With this trend, dating becomesless about finding a partner
and more about finding aconnection with someone who
shares your values and interestsin a more natural, organic way.

(56:34):
We've been talking about thissince the beginning of time on
this podcast If you go all theway back to episode 32, 33,
talking about those sharedvalues, those mutual interests,
and when those things areorganic, you're not forcing them
, you're being honest, you'renot trying to impress somebody
You're genuinely invested andinterested in the same things.

(56:56):
It also adds a layer of support, as meeting someone through
shared community activities canprovide a built-in network of
mutual friends and interests.
If you're thinking about it, ifyou're going out and you're
doing things that you like to do, getting active in areas of the
community that you actuallyappreciate, you are going to
number one you probably alreadyhave friends that are doing

(57:16):
those same things.
Number two if you don't, you'regoing to be making those
friends and they become mutualfriends of that relationship.
So you have a safety net tokind of help the both of you go
through the ebbs and flows of anew relationship.
Ultimately, 2025 is all aboutpurposeful connections.
I love that, purposefulconnections.
I love that, as people aretruly tired of the rut dating

(57:43):
apps have created.
In 2025, predicting dating willbecome more intentional because
people seeking authenticconnections rather than swiping
mindlessly.
We're moving into a phase whereemotional intelligence and
vulnerability are the newfinance.
Six foot five blue-eyed blondedudes right, Everybody.
What's your dream guy?
It's Ken.
It's Barbie and Ken that's whatmy dream is.

(58:03):
We're going to move away fromthat and more into emotional
intelligence and vulnerability,and daters will prioritize depth
over superficial thrillmatching.
This shift in dating depth oversuperficial thrill matching.
This shift in dating is vastlydifferent than the quickly
swiping left and right, becausemeaningful conversations and

(58:23):
slower courtships are so.
In this year, another trend thatthe doctor believes will be big
in 2025 coincides with thisintentional dating trend, and
that is caring about mentalhealth intentional dating trend
and that is caring about mentalhealth.
Again, going back to ourepisodes where I think it was 32
, that was literally talkingabout self-care.
You have to love yourself, youhave to be comfortable with

(58:45):
yourself.
This really goes right in handwith this research.
Here.
More people are going totherapy, working on themselves
and bringing the self-awarenessinto their dating lives.
It's exciting to see ageneration of daters who are
ready to prioritize healthy,fulfilling relationships over
traditional rush.
To cover up, I know I kind ofran through that article, but so

(59:06):
much of that is what you and mehave been talking about for
years Meaningful conversations,authentic connections,
purposeful connections,connections, purposeful
connections, core values, sharedvalues.
It's good news for everybody.
It seems like America is movingaway from the social media
dating app nonsense.
I understand there's people andwe probably know some people

(59:29):
that met online, I'm sure.
But in all honesty, gettingback to the old-fashioned way of
going out and havingconversations and doing things
and being happy and seeingpeople.
Like not too long ago, we wereall living in our freaking house
.
People had to be on dating apps, right, we weren't allowed to
socialize, we had to be in masks.
I couldn't imagine trying tomeet somebody in 2020, right,

(59:53):
could you imagine going out anddoing that nonsense?
Like you think somebody lookspretty interesting from the
forehead to the bridge of thenose and then when they pull
that mask off and they get twobicuspids you know what I mean.

Speaker 2 (01:00:06):
Better off keeping the mask on.

Speaker 1 (01:00:08):
So to all those single Pringles out there that
we've been telling you listen,prioritize these things.
These are what's important toyou.
The good doctor is coming toyou, the good doctors coming to
you with some good gospel totell you people are falling suit
.
Man, you can start to get offof the dating apps.
Listen, if you like it and youwant it, that's fine.
But I'm telling you, if youspend endless hours scrolling

(01:00:31):
TikTok and Instagram and thebook face and what other other
freaking app you want to be on,eventually you just get hyper
focused on scrolling andscrolling and scrolling,
searching for dopamine, gettingnothing out of it.
That is going to trickle overto the freaking dating app
scenario too.
I can imagine somebody sittingon the couch swiping right and

(01:00:52):
left and up and down whateverfreaking way you have to swipe
on a goddamn dating app.
I can imagine somebody sittingon their couch scrolling through
dating apps just as fast as youscroll through TikTok or I
scroll through sportsinformation At some point.
There's no connection.
There's nothing meaningful.
You're just looking at freaking, a filter-fueled, fake life.

(01:01:14):
Get off the couch, go outside,join a group, pick up a racket
and play some pickleball I don'tfreaking know.
Get out there and do some shitthat makes you happy.
When you're happy, you're morelikely to find somebody that's
happy.
When you're happy, you're morelikely to receive your gifts.
And when you're doing thingsthat you love to do and you're

(01:01:35):
being happy and doing thosethings, the likelihood of you
finding somebody that loves thesame shit as you, it goes up
tremendously.
That is my tip and trick foryou if you're single in 2025.
What do you and the prom queenover there have to add to that
little rant we just went on?

Speaker 2 (01:01:51):
What do you have to add?
Well, I mean, we wanted tochime in a few times, but you
were just ranting on, so we justwaited our turn well then, give
me something good you talkabout going out into the
community and doing things, um,and I think you mentioned
something about getting out ofyour comfort zone.
Um, and that was a prime uhopportunity for for me when I

(01:02:17):
came to the dealership and metyou.
I had never been to thedealership number one, didn't
know anything about a wett-shirt contest Like those.
Things were like out of mycomfort zone, but it was like
getting out into the communityand exploring.

Speaker 1 (01:02:32):
Right, try new things .

Speaker 2 (01:02:34):
Man, get out there and try new things and you might
be surprised who and what youfind and what you like you know
and then I have a funny story,um about um, you'll meet the
person that you, that you'resupposed to be with, or that
share interest.
Um, back in the day, when, uh,my brother was with me, this boy

(01:02:58):
would eat, breathe and sleepbasketball.
And I kept telling him all thetime, every single day boy, you
got to get off the basketballcourt to meet a girl.
You got to get off thebasketball court.
You're never going to meet agirl.
You're playing with a bunch ofsweaty dudes.
You're never going to meet agirl.
You're playing with a bunch ofsweaty dudes.
You're never going to meet agirl.
Well, lo and behold, who walksonto the basketball court.

Speaker 1 (01:03:24):
No other than his beautiful wife, girlfriend Danny
.
Hey Mary, yeah, you're puttingthe pressure on him right now.

Speaker 2 (01:03:27):
Hey, listen Baby mama right now.
Baby mama.

Speaker 1 (01:03:29):
Baby mama.

Speaker 2 (01:03:30):
Danny and they have a beautiful baby and living the
life.
And guess what?
He met her on the basketballcourt.

Speaker 1 (01:03:37):
That's what I'm saying Do things that you love.
It gets you out of the house,it makes you happier.
We're living in crazy timesright now and the more you can
submerge yourself into thingsthat you love, number one, it's
going to result in you beinghappier.
And, number two, if you're outin the community doing those
things, you might find somebody,just like Zach and Danny, that

(01:04:03):
are into those mutual things and, like you said, try new things,
get out there and explore newthings.
They talk about moving forward.
The real trends in dating arelike this person's a matchmaker.
She's saying it comes down tolike a matchmaker and these
activities so like for us, ifyou think, for instance, we've
put some couples together.
We've played matchmaker before.
I got a couple marriages undermy belt.

(01:04:24):
I've got children under my beltfrom relationship connections
right From putting thingstogether, putting people in the
right place.
Sometimes we've been givencredit for relationship
connections when, ultimately,all you and me did is what we
always do and that was create anenvironment.
We threw a party, we had areason and people that know us,

(01:04:48):
that love us, came out tosupport us and the next thing
you know they're going home witheach other.
You know what I mean.
It happens.
So if you're not paying for amatchmaker, you don't have a
matchmaker.
There might be somebody in yourlife that's close to you that
becomes a matchmaker and they'renot even intending to.
You know what I mean.
Like we've been matchmakerswithout any intention of being

(01:05:11):
matchmakers and sometimes I'vedone it intentionally.
Dave and Alicia, Iintentionally made that happen.
That's funny.
Side note Now to wrap up thiswhole little relationship hoopla
ditty that we've embarked ontoday, I'm going to take this
episode and all these littlefun-filled things and I'm going

(01:05:33):
to connect something I heard onthe news earlier today when I
was watching President Trump andElon Musk have a little press
conference, little businesssoiree, szechuan Q&A.
Elon Musk made a statement aboutbuilding trust about him.

(01:05:56):
You know how can we trust youand Doge with this new endeavor
that you're on?
And he literally saidtransparency.
Anything and everything I'mdoing you can see.
You can see anything that I'mdoing.
We report every single thing Ido to X and to our website.
But he went on to say you don'tdemand trust.
Trust takes transparency.

(01:06:19):
You get trust from transparencyand I understand absolutely
what he was saying in the senseof the business logic, the
political logic that he wassaying, but I think his words
ring so true and they go on intoanything and everything you do.
If we're thinking and talkingabout relationships like we are

(01:06:40):
today, if you want yoursignificant other or your
potential partner to trust you,it starts with transparency.
Trust takes transparency themoment that you're not scared of
your phone being right side up,you're not hiding things,
you're not, you know, justpacking things away.

(01:07:00):
The moment that you'recomfortable and you can just
live and live your life andyou're willing to share all
aspects of your life.
You are transparent.
You're vulnerable.
You're transparent.
You're sharing and showing anddoing all things you.
You're not being fake, you'reauthentic.
Every layer of your life.

(01:07:20):
Transparency in every layer ofyour life.
That is going to breed trust.
If you're meeting somebody,you're about to start a new
relationship, or maybe you'vebeen married and you find your
guys are starting to get at eachother a little bit, think about
it.
Trust.
If you want to get to get ateach other a little bit, think
about it.
Trust.
If you want to get back totrusting each other, it takes
transparency.

(01:07:41):
I learned that today from thenews Shout out Elon Musk.
I heard that and I instantlywrote it down.
I was like that's beautiful.

Speaker 2 (01:07:49):
I love it, that's good.

Speaker 1 (01:07:52):
Do you trust me?

Speaker 2 (01:07:53):
Do I trust you?
Depends on the situation I'mgoing to kick your.
Do you trust me?
Do I trust you Depends on thesituation I'm going to kick your
ass.
Do I trust you not to get yourtractor stuck and not to wreck?

Speaker 1 (01:08:01):
your bumper.
That's about enough of today'sshow.
No.

Speaker 2 (01:08:03):
I do not Do I trust you in our relationship 110%.

Speaker 1 (01:08:08):
You're going to trust me to blister your hind end
right now, as we're going offthe air, that you can book it
and cook it.

Speaker 2 (01:08:16):
Wow, you're going to show me some attention, you're
going to touch me.

Speaker 1 (01:08:19):
Okay, this is getting a little aggressive.
Happy Valentine's Day everybody.

Speaker 2 (01:08:24):
Happy Valentine's Day y'all, Thank you for supporting
our American dream.

Speaker 1 (01:08:30):
Now go wash your fucking hands.

Speaker 2 (01:08:33):
Your filthy hands.

Speaker 1 (01:08:34):
You filthy savage, you fucking savage that's it and
that's all Biggie Smalls.
If you're a loud, proudAmerican and you find yourself

(01:09:00):
just wanting more, find me onYouTube and Facebook at loud,
proud American Put a face page,as my mama calls it.
If you're a fan of the GrahamCracker, want to find me on
Instagram.
Or all the kids aretickety-talking on the TikTok
Instagram, or all the kids atTickety Talkin' on the TikTok.
You can find me on both ofthose at loud, underscore, proud

(01:09:21):
, underscore, american.
A big old thank you to the boysfrom the Gut Truckers for the
background beats and the themesong to this year's podcast.
If you are enjoying what you'rehearing, you can track down the

(01:09:42):
Gut Truckers on Facebook.
Just search Gut Truckers.
Give them motherfuckers a liketoo.

(01:10:08):
I truly thank you forsupporting my American dream.
Now go wash your fucking hands,you filthy savage.