December 10, 2025 • 43 mins
Holidays have a way of turning up the volume on everything—joy, grief, pressure, and hope. This week, we follow a small family errand that became a marker moment: a dad, his daughter, his brother home after 15 years, and their mother, all riding out to find a Christmas gift. In the middle of the drive, a bald eagle swept overhead—an unmistakable nudge that love and legacy keep circling back. That sign connected to a deeper reminder we all need right now: you’re not as far from your purpose as you think.
From there we get honest about money stress, marketplace no-shows, and the mental spiral that tells you to quit your dreams. We unpack a faith-centered framework that helps you hold steady when life feels late: divine presence, the bigger picture, trust and surrender, and preparation. These four pillars turn setbacks into signals and build the “confidence calluses” that carry you through the next round of uncertainty. You’ll hear how this lens reshaped holiday anxiety, softened the edge of comparison, and opened a little more room for grace.
The heart of the episode lands in a moment long thought impossible: walking into church as a family—wife, daughter, and brother—standing together as music swells and baptisms unfold. It didn’t erase past losses or fix everything overnight, but it reframed what’s possible. We left with a simple commitment and a stronger hope. If you’re feeling behind, overwhelmed, or just tired, this conversation will meet you where you are and nudge you forward one step at a time.
If this resonates, follow the show, share it with someone who needs a lift, and leave a quick review. Your words help bring more people into a community where struggle becomes growth and faith fuels the next step.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:01):
On this week's episode of Share the Struggle
Podcast, its new struggles, itsnew challenges, but it's also
new traditions and new memories.
Together, we accept that we arenever as far away as we think we
are.
From living the life we want tolive, achieving and attaining
(00:22):
the goals we have for ourselves,and fulfilling that purpose that
was bestowed upon each and everyone of us.
That and more on this week'sepisode of Share the Struggle
Podcast.
Let me tell you something.
Everybody struggles.
The difference is some peoplechoose to go through it and some
choose to grow through it.
(00:42):
The choice is completely yours.
Which one you choose will have avery profound effect on the way
you live your life.
It's a struggle.
(01:05):
Uncomfortable conversations.
You are right where you need tobe.
(01:40):
What it do, what it do, what ithot.
Almighty.
Am I so excited to be back withyou?
Oh, it is true.
It is damn true.
Because I love you, baby boo.
Welcome to that podcast.
That perfectly, precisely,beautifully named podcast.
(02:04):
Share the struggle becauseeverybody struggles.
But we all have come to knowthat if you are courageous
enough, bold enough, transparentenough to share your stuff, then
you will motivate somebody else.
You will pull them through.
You will shine a light on themtoo.
(02:24):
Because everybody's strugglecontains seeds of hope, clues
for success, and opportunitiesfor togetherness.
There's positivity in ourstories.
There is strength and growth tobe learned, to be shared, to be
multiplied.
You just gotta tune in and shareit week after week, and you end
(02:47):
up doing something positive andperfect like us, which is 283
weeks of you and me.
Oh baby.
It is true.
283 consecutive weeks of you andme on this year podcast.
Find all things podcast relatedover to w share the struggle
podcast.com.
(03:08):
I don't know where that voicecame from, but hey, it's the
holidays, man.
We get freaky around theholidays.
Am I right?
unknown (03:15):
Whew.
SPEAKER_00 (03:17):
All my day ones, my loyal ones, the ones that have
been listening since all the wayback in July 2020.
Get your ones up.
I acknowledge you.
I appreciate you.
To all the noobs here, the newones, maybe this is your day
one.
I welcome you.
As we've been doing over thepast few weeks, we shout out a
few uh cities and states andsometimes countries that are
(03:38):
starting to tune in.
So this week, we got four noobsfor you that I want to welcome
to the show.
I want to say thank you fortuning into the show.
We got McKeesport, Pennsylvania.
Welcome to this positive,positive tribe we have growing
over here in McKeesport,Pennsylvania.
Welcome, Largo, Florida.
(03:58):
Come on in, Largo, Florida.
This one, Fargo, North Dakota.
Well, that was a show, wasn'tit?
I really want to go to Dakotasometime, man.
I really want to do um reallywant to do it.
I I would love to be a vendor inSturgis.
I wonder if I can someday makethat happen.
But welcome, Fargo, NorthDakota.
(04:21):
Also, welcome, Bruton, Alabama.
That's right, folks.
Roll tide.
We're starting to get a nicelittle little uh group, positive
vibe and tribe out there inBama.
I like it.
Pennsylvania, Florida, NorthDakota, Alabama.
I love each and every one ofyou.
Thank you for tuning in.
Thank you for listening in.
(04:42):
I truly, truly appreciate it.
I hope everybody out there isdoing so nice.
We got Thanksgiving behind us.
Christmas is fastly approachingus.
I'm just gonna tell y'all,Christmas is coming quick this
year, man.
I think because Thanksgiving waslike right at the end of
November, you feel like you havea like one less week when it
(05:04):
comes to uh shopping and stuff,man.
I was looking at the calendarand realized, shoot, we're
getting pretty damn close toChristmas.
Y'all better stopprocrastinating.
You better stop waiting.
You better hurry up and get onover to LauProudAmerican.shop
before we sell out of all thepopular items that we have in
stock.
You better get over there, man.
(05:24):
We got daily deals all the time.
Right now we have our uminfamous, famous Savage t-shirt
on sale for 20 bucks.
We've got a multitude oft-shirts that are normally$27.
Buy two for$50,$400,$400.
We've got hoodies on there for$40,$50,$50.
I'm telling you right now,folks, there's deals over there.
(05:44):
Get on over there,LauProudAmerican.shop.
You have time to purchaseyourself something and get it in
time for Christmas.
So don't miss out.
Also, keep your beauty littleeyes peeled.
They're probably gonna startdoing a lot more lives as the
holidays are getting closer.
So you'll find us out therespreading the good love and the
good gospel of proudly made inAmerica Christmas gifts, which I
(06:07):
think are the best gifts togive.
You know what I'm saying?
Just the best gifts to give.
Speaking of giving gifts, um,today I actually went on a quick
little excursion to pick up a umgift for the wife.
Something I actually found onFacebook Marketplace, and it
goes along with uh like a littletheme I'm establishing for the
(06:29):
wife here.
And uh this year, we're notgoing crazy on Christmas, we're
focusing on the little one anduh enjoying the time that we
have and and her excitement andjoy and wonderment.
But uh obviously we want to dosome special things for each
other, and today I I foundsomething on Marketplace that I
really wanted to get, and uh itwas a cool little impromptu
(06:51):
adventure, and there's a reasonwhy I'm telling you this, but uh
today is Daddy Daughter Day.
Um I get up at about five in themorning, I bring my mom to work,
then I come home, I work for alittle bit, Allie gets up, she
goes to work, and then um me andPaisley have the afternoon
together or the morning andafternoon, then we go pick up me
and Ma together at the store.
(07:12):
So today I was getting ready toleave, and my brother uh called
me and said, Hey man, where areyou going?
And I was like, Oh, I'm justgonna go pick up Ma and I got
this little errand to run if youwant to tag along.
So he came with, and uh, so itwas me and Paisley and my
brother, my brother Charlie, andthen we went and picked my mom
up at work, and I said, Well,surprise, we're going on a
(07:32):
little road trip here.
So the three of us with thelittle one, we headed out, and
uh I I honestly can't tell youthe last time we did something
like that together, the lasttime we've really just sat down
together and just talked thatlong, you know what I mean?
And if you guys have beenlistening week after week, you
(07:55):
understand my brother justfinished a 15-year prison
sentence, and uh we're startingto do some things, you know,
again.
Uh, or we're starting to, insome cases, do things for the
first time, which is reallywhere I want to head to today,
but I want to easy into it.
I want to trickle our way intoit by sharing this little story
(08:16):
first.
It's pretty cool the fact thatthe three of us with my little
baby girl are out on anadventure to get something for
my wife for Christmas.
So I find myself being a littlenostalgic in the vehicle and
thinking, here I am Christmasshopping for my wife with my
daughter, with her grandmother,aka Mima, and her uncle.
(08:41):
And you start to trace that downand think about my mother
saying, Here I am shopping formy daughter-in-law, with my two
sons and my granddaughter, mybrother who's been behind bars
for 15 years, saying, I'm on anadventure with my brother, my
mother, and my niece.
When you start thinking abouteverybody's perspective and
(09:04):
opinions and feelings from eachdifferent seat in the deniali,
you start to think about life alittle bit different.
So having those moments ofreflection, it makes you feel
really good because this littlecircle we have has been missing
limbs off the tree, has beenlosing limbs off the tree.
(09:28):
I know if you're tuning in forthe first time, then maybe this
episode's gonna leave you justcurious enough to go back and
listen to all the episodes toclue you in on what's been going
on in this crazy life and worldthat we live.
Because over the past few yearsI've I've lost my father.
I've lost my grandmother, I'velost my grandfather, I've lost
(09:51):
two of my brothers, some of mybest friends.
I've been disowned and cut offby family.
We've chosen to disown and cutoff family.
This tree begins to be a bit ofa pole with very few branches on
said tree.
It's a whole different feelinghaving some of those branches
(10:13):
back.
And spending this time issomething that I'm still not
used to.
And last week we talked aboutsome of the things that I want,
what I want for my brother, whatI want for my wife and for my
daughter, those relationships,those connections, what I want
for them.
It's pretty surreal toexperience them.
(10:33):
And I've seen some some bigchanges in my brother, some big
changes in the way he thinks andlooks at things, and it gives me
encouragement for him and hisdirection and his ability to
regain the life he lost and livethe life that he deserves.
So today, as we're out on thislittle journey to buy something
for for Ali for Christmas, we'rejust kind of sharing some
(10:57):
stories and reflecting.
I look up, coming right at thevehicle, right at the SUV.
I see big, bold, beautiful, asbright and majestic as can
possibly be.
This amazing bald eagle.
(11:19):
I couldn't believe it.
This beautiful, amazing,majestic bald eagle, full
spread, soaring right at us, andthen swooping up in the air and
just circling over us.
I yelled to my mom, and shelooked at it, and we both just
stared at it as much as we couldas we were driving by and he was
(11:43):
soaring off into the sky, and weknew at that moment how proud my
father is that we're gettingthis unit back together.
We knew at that moment the factthat my father was also in that
vehicle today.
There wasn't just four seats,there wasn't just four opinions
(12:04):
and perspectives, there werefive.
And it has been validated to usby multiple mediums and and just
by our own intuition and feelingthat my father comes back as an
eagle when he wants to make hispresence known, he comes back as
(12:28):
an eagle.
And today, when we were out onthis Christmas adventure, my
father joined us.
I get goosebumps, I getteary-eyed, and I get blessed
and thankful just thinking aboutit.
I know how much it meant to mymother to see that, and this was
(12:48):
one of the best, clearest,precise images of an eagle that
I've ever seen.
Like it was it was justgorgeous.
And every time I see my fatherback as an eagle, I always state
the case that to validate thisand to make it even more true, I
(13:09):
am a forty-two-year-old man, andin the first forty years of my
life, I think I've seen an eagletwice.
Since the passing of my fathertwo years ago, I've seen an
eagle fifteen, twenty times.
That to me, folks, is not acoincidence.
That made me feel good.
I've been struggling with somethings.
(13:29):
I think we all have our ownindividual struggles and battles
when it comes to the holidays.
I've been trying to be creativeon a lot of things, uh, selling
different things, offloading umstuff that I just, you know,
either I don't have a use for orI haven't used it enough.
And as of late, I've beengetting stood up and uh let down
(13:52):
by marketplace.
I've had countless peopletelling me that I'm on my way,
I'm coming to buy this, or I'llbe there tomorrow, and then
these people just don't show upand they don't respond, and they
get your hopes up and they getyou down.
Um, because every time I feellike I'm carving a path through
the forest of self-doubt anddebt and despair, every time I
(14:14):
think I'm carving that paththrough the forest, then that
that path just closes up, right?
More trees pop up, the fog setsin, the rain comes down, and
before you know it, I feel likeI'm back to ground zero.
When it feels like those billscontinue to stack, the ability
to pay them begins to lack, whenthose tipping moments in life,
(14:39):
when they happen, when you getyourself in the position where
things aren't getting paid ontime, and you're getting through
and you're pulling through, butyou're using every ounce of uh
of will and strength andcreativity possible.
You have these moments where youcan really doubt yourself.
You can really doubt yourdirection, you can begin to
(15:00):
think about giving up on yourdream, you can begin to think
about changing your direction,and something like today happens
that shows you you're not alone,you are on the right path.
There's been some things thathave happened over the past few
days to prove to me to continueon this here path.
(15:22):
This morning, while I wasworking in the office, I was
listening to uh some previous uhsermons on uh on YouTube um from
this uh this this church andthis um pastor that I really
enjoy, Stephen Furtick fromElevation Church.
I find myself listening to himquite often, and this morning he
(15:46):
delivered a message, which thegreat thing about this message
is that it wasn't a sermon thathe gave like today or yesterday.
I think it was from months oryears ago.
I didn't even pay attention, butit found me today, and one of
the things that he said today isyou're never as far away as you
(16:06):
think you are.
You see, we often feel thatthose goals, those hopes, those
dreams, those aspirations, thatlife we want to live, the things
we want to attain, we feel likeit is so far away.
But in truth, they're never asfar away as we think we they
are, because it's not our plan.
(16:29):
It's God's plan.
And we are right where we aresupposed to be.
We are where we need to be.
And it's so hard for us tounderstand how close our hopes,
dreams, aspirations, and mostimportantly, purpose, the
purpose that we're supposed tofulfill, we have a hard time
understanding how close thosethings are because it's not our
(16:51):
plan.
We think we have a plan for somany things in this life.
I think that there's a plan formy business, and I have these
goals, and I try to forecastthese things for this business,
but I'm unaware of the fact ofwhat God's actual plan is for me
and this business, and just howclose I am to realizing that
(17:13):
plan, to experiencing that plan,to stepping into and fulfilling
my purpose.
We are never as far away in lifefrom the things that we hope
for, that we pray for, that wedesire for, that we are meant
for.
We're never as far away fromthose things as we think we are.
(17:33):
Those things can all come to usovernight.
Those things can all come to usbefore we know it.
We need to unite and hold fastto a common spiritual belief
that despite the fact that wemight feel lost, that we might
be distant, or we're makingmistakes, we are always within
(17:54):
reach of divine love andpurpose, with God's bigger,
better plan unfolding eventhrough setbacks and preparing
us for something bigger, forsomething greater than we
ourselves can imagine.
Sometimes we go through thehurt, sometimes we go through
the doubt, sometimes we losesight, we think it's never going
(18:17):
to work out.
But we must emphasize and trustin his timing and his wisdom
over our own limited view.
We are never as far away fromthe life that we want, from
fulfilling and living in ourpurpose.
We are never as far away as wethink we are.
I did a little research on thisquote today because it motivated
(18:40):
me today.
And there's a few keys that comeinto play with this message.
Number one, divine presence.
You can never go too far awayfrom God's reach.
His love is infinite and alwaysavailable, no matter how lost
you feel.
He's always there for us.
(19:02):
We always have the opportunityto lean into his presence.
There's a bigger picture, butseems like failure or delay is
often part of a larger, unseenplan, preparing you for future
blessings and divine purpose.
There was another speech that Ilistened to from uh Steven that
(19:24):
I listened to months ago, butit's coming to me right now as
we're having this conversationbecause it really goes in line
with that bigger picture.
What seems like failure or delayis often part of a larger,
unseen plan preparing you forfuture blessings or divine
purpose.
He was discussing the fact thatthere's going to be times in
your life where you'restruggling, where you're down,
(19:47):
where you're out, where you'refeeling defeated, when you're
you're overly depleted, and youfind a way to pull yourself
through.
No matter how difficult, nomatter how painful, you find a
way to pull yourself through,and you tell yourself, I'm never
going back.
To that, I never want toexperience that again.
And oftentimes when we findourselves in these situations,
we find ourselves with thesebattles and these struggles, we
(20:10):
come out of it and say, Man, Ireally wish I didn't have to go
through that.
And there's nothing good thatcame of that.
You know, like when we gothrough things in life, we often
say, like, oh well, there's areason for it.
And uh, you know, um, I learnedthis lesson from it.
But sometimes we go through sucha shitty situation that you come
(20:33):
out of it and say, There's noway that was worth it.
There's no way that um wassomething that I needed to
experience.
But that is because we cannotsee the bigger picture.
What seems like failure, whatseems like delay, what seems
like never-ending struggle anddespair, it is actually a lesson
(20:58):
that will help you in thefuture.
Because there's going to be atime in life where you encounter
something similar, or you findyourself in a situation where
life is crashing down, and maybeeven just the smallest
confidence that you can musterup is the fact that you can
reflect on this time that we'rediscussing when we came through
(21:20):
that scenario.
When you start to think back toit and say, remember how
difficult that was?
Remember how down on the dumps Iwas, remember how I thought
everything around me was overand it was all coming to an end.
I pulled through because of thatexperience of pulling through.
I know that I possess theability to pull through yet
(21:40):
again.
There's a lesson from the factthat I made it through the
lowest of lows, that whateverthe low is I faced today, it
wasn't what I faced yesterday.
You're building confidence.
You're building, I like toconsider them confidence
calluses, right?
I'm I'm calling myself withconfidence, these layers of
(22:03):
confidence that all as manytimes as I fail, as many times
as this business leaves me goingthrough the count cushions for
change to survive, as many timesas that happens in my life, I'm
callusing myself and I'm findingconfidence.
And those years of calluses andthe struggle and the despair has
(22:24):
me at a position right now whereI can look myself in the mirror
and say, You don't know wherethose payments are coming from
today, this morning, as I lookin the mirror, but we ain't made
it to lunch yet, and we ain'tmade it to dinner yet.
You understand what I'm saying?
There's opportunity.
So we, as the message says,can't always see the bigger
(22:47):
picture.
And that these failures, thesedifficulties in our life, they
are lessons.
And if you listen to thepodcast, you always hear me say,
sprinkle time and distance onit, and it all makes sense.
Sometimes the struggles makesense when we sprinkle two
months, two years, twenty yearsdown the road and realize I'm
(23:11):
conditioned for this, I've beenthrough this.
The next tip I found today istrust and surrender.
The core message of what Stephensaid to us is that if you
surrender your limited plans toGod's perfect higher plan,
trusting that He sees the wholepath and knows what's best,
(23:32):
followed by preparation.
Difficult seasons, loneliness,or feeling buried are seen as
planting and preparation,building character and strength
for what's to come.
Those are those confidencecalluses that I just spoke of.
Those are four keys.
The four pillars to that messagefrom Stephen Divine presence,
(23:56):
bigger picture, trust andsurrender, and preparation.
We're going through it, folks.
We're growing through it.
We have been struggling in thisworld, in this life for years.
I can confidently say right now,today, each and every one of you
listening and myself speaking,we have all struggled this year.
(24:17):
We have all had varying degreesof struggle this year.
This might be your worst year,this might be your best year,
but this year was not free ofstruggle.
Those struggles, those failures,those mistakes, those things are
not telling you that you'reslipping further and further
away from your goals, yourhopes, your dreams, your
(24:40):
aspirations.
Those things, those struggles,those failures, they're not you
slipping further away.
They're you realizing four keythings divine presence, bigger
picture, trust and surrender,and preparation.
You are being taught four keylessons.
(25:00):
Learning those lessons, in fact,are bringing you, are pulling
you closer to your goals.
They are bringing you closer tothe life you want to live.
They are getting you closer toliving and fulfilling your
purpose.
We are never as far away as wethink we are.
(25:23):
Right now you might findyourself thinking, okay, big
fella, that was an upliftinglittle message.
Unexpected, but uplifting.
Okay, okay, I think I'munderstanding.
I'm not gonna give up on mydreams.
I'm going to embrace my faith alittle bit more.
I'm going to encourage myself alittle bit more, and I'm going
to acknowledge I'm nowhere nearwhere I think I should be, but
(25:46):
that doesn't mean anything to mebecause my hopes and goals and
dreams, they might be rightaround the other corner to me.
I don't know.
We're never as far away as wethink we are.
Okay, great message.
But my question to you is whydid you have to take me to
church and why did you have todeliver this message?
Well, I'll answer that question,which is getting really odd
(26:10):
because I shouldn't bedelivering the message, asking
the questions, and answering thequestions.
This is getting strange.
People are going to start havingquestions about me and my own
disorders.
But there's nobody here to joinme and ask these questions.
But I'm just going to assumethat some of you listening are
probably saying, hey man, Ididn't sign up for church today.
(26:30):
Why are you coming at me likethat today?
And where is this message comingfrom in the first place?
Well, this message, number one,I think it came to me.
It was dropped upon me.
And it's really part of thestruggles and the things that
I'm going through.
And as we say week after week,we come on here and share the
struggles and the things thatwe're going through, the things
(26:51):
that we're growing through.
But I decided to deliver thismessage and have this
conversation today because Irealize this is a difficult
season for so many of us rightnow.
There's so many people that theholiday season just makes them
uncomfortable.
The holiday season makes them dothings they don't want to do.
(27:11):
How many of you are the socialbutterfly in the family that
enjoys the Christmasget-togethers versus how many of
you would just rather not go tothose all together?
There's a fair mix of you, I'msure.
To the ones of you listeningthat are the social butterflies
and you love the familyget-togethers, do you
(27:33):
acknowledge and realize andunderstand that there's people
in your family, in your circle,that would much rather not be
there?
That they would rather be homeby themselves.
If you're one of those peoplethat would rather be home by
yourself, then you know howdifficult these parties and
situations can be.
And I would beg to say thatthere's probably a multitude of
(27:56):
things you have to do during theholidays, and there's a good
handful of them that you reallywant to do.
And there might be one or two ofthem that you'd really rather
not do, no matter how sociallyyou are.
Because sometimes maybe it's thecompany Christmas party you have
to go to that makes youuncomfortable.
Maybe it's the in-laws that youdon't really get all warm and
cozy with.
(28:17):
Maybe it's your own family.
Maybe you're one of the peoplein the family that didn't quite
achieve all that your parentsthought you should achieve.
Or maybe you don't stack up toyour big brother Steve.
Or maybe, you know, SisterCheryl's always overachieving.
And maybe you're the one withoutthe kids, you're the one without
(28:39):
the husband.
You're the one without the dreamjob.
There's stress and anxiety, andthese all these things that
really come to the surfaceduring the holidays.
Because it's so easy for so manyof us to dismiss these feelings
and to not place ourselves inthe uncomfortable melting pot of
(29:00):
family and face our fears, toface our letdowns, to face the
fact that maybe we lost our jobthis year, maybe we went through
a breakup, maybe we are single,maybe we don't have kids.
There's so many difficult timesand discussions and experiences
(29:20):
that either you're going throughright now or you're about to go
through.
I wanted to have thisconversation weeks ahead of
Christmas because we're comingout of Thanksgiving.
Maybe you already had some ofthese uncomfortable situations
and you're not looking forwardto doing it again.
I'm here to feed you somecourage.
I'm here to feed you someconfidence.
(29:41):
I'm here to feed you with thefact that no matter how short
you feel when you stack up toBrother Steve, you, my friend,
are not as far away from Steveor the best version of you than
you think you are.
Give yourself credit.
Walk into whatever situation youhave to walk into like a boss.
(30:04):
You are you.
You're doing the best to be thebest version of you.
Maybe you're struggling, maybeyou're succeeding, but the truth
is you're a heck of a lot closerto where you want to be than you
think you are.
Don't go into this season whenit's supposed to be such an
(30:26):
uplifting, positive spiritualseason.
Don't go into it as a season ofdepression.
Go into it as a season of hope.
Acknowledge where you've beenand acknowledge that you're not
where you want to be, but thereis no way of telling just how
close you are.
(30:46):
I know this message was kind ofall over the place, but it
landed on me for a reason, and Iwanted to give it to you for a
reason because together we willget through the season.
There's layers of self-doubtduring the holidays, there's
layers of self-sabotage, there'slayers of endless debt during
(31:06):
this season.
We're all trying to figure out,you know, heating our homes,
feeding our families, affordingthe gifts, paying the bills, not
losing the car, and keeping thedreams alive.
We all have certain struggles.
None of us are free fromstruggle this time of the year.
That's why I felt it wasimportant to share this story
(31:29):
right here.
I also really, really, reallywant to emphasize the benefit of
leading into your faith.
I really want to sprinkle faithon this season of depression
that you might face.
I really want to emphasise faithif you're in the holiday spirit
(31:50):
and you're enjoying the holidayseason.
So no matter where you are, ifyou understand what I just said,
no matter how you're feelingabout this Christmas season,
whether you hate it, whether youlove it, there's more reason for
you to lean into your faith thisseason.
Why am I saying these things?
Why am I so confident in thesethings?
Well, I'm gonna give you oneprime example for all of these
(32:14):
things, and that example is justwhat the good Lord is doing for
me and my family this holidayseason.
As I started today's showtelling you the story of me and
my brother and my mother outshopping for my wife for
Christmas, encountering theeagle of my father.
(32:35):
I can tell you that on Sunday Idid something that I never
imagined possible.
I hinted towards it, I alludedto it in last week's episode of
the show without even knowing ifit would come true.
But on Sunday, we woke up and mymy wife and Paisley and my
(32:56):
brother Charlie all went tochurch as a family.
We went to church as a family.
Fifteen years ago when mybrother went to prison.
There was two things that Iknew.
I myself was a long ways awayfrom a church, and if I told him
(33:17):
I was going to church, he wouldhave probably just laughed in my
face.
Here we are, fifteen yearslater, a lot of life lived, a
lot of life missed.
But here we are together as afamily walking into church.
As a little boy, I rememberwalking onto athletic fields,
(33:40):
watching my brother with hishelmet and shoulder pads running
on the field.
As a little boy, I remember whenmy brother started driving on
his own and having his license,and he would bring me to the
mall, and I remember him walkingme around the mall and and and
showing me what it meant to berespected, what it meant to be
(34:06):
talked to like an adult, even asa child.
I remember these instances,these occurrences in my life
where I had looked to my brotheras a hero, when I looked to my
brother and was extremely proudof him.
For the first time since thosedays, I walked into church, I
(34:31):
stood in the aisle and I lookedover proud of my brother.
Walking in hand in hand tochurch as a family, something I
never imagined possible.
Was incredible.
God did that for us.
(34:52):
Allie brought Paisley to checkin to the little um like nursery
daycare classroom scenario.
And me and my brother stoodthere, waiting for Allie,
holding the seats, nice andclose to the stage, but back far
enough, sharing conversationthat I would never have
(35:17):
imagined.
We talked about someday gettingmy mother to come back to church
with us, and him telling me, I'mgonna tell her the same thing
about her that I told her aboutyou.
I just want to do things withyou again, man.
I spent 15 years without you.
I just want to spend time withyou.
(35:38):
Not in a bar, not at a club.
I just want to spend time withyou.
Get to know you again.
And he talked about reallywanting to embrace his faith.
He talked about conversationswith my mom about his faith.
He talked about finding a homewith his faith.
(36:01):
He talked about That's kind ofcrazy.
You guys just heard me um pauseright there.
I'm sure you heard me pause, andright before that pause, you
might have actually heard myphone go off.
But my phone just went off witha YouTube update from Steven
(36:22):
Furtick, who I'm speaking of,who was the motivator for this
conversation, who delivered themessage to me this morning.
You are not as far away as youthink you are.
My phone just lit up right now,and the post says, What will you
surrender to God?
(36:43):
Kinda funny, kinda fitting.
Here we are surrendering rightnow.
Needed to share that with youbecause it just popped up on my
phone in real time.
Me and my brother hadconversations that up until now
we weren't capable of having inour relationship.
I was proud of him.
(37:04):
We were standing there lookingaround, and he was like just in
awe.
I could see it in his face.
And he was excited.
He was he was joyful.
And the music started, and thecertain the service started, and
the band started singing.
And I let him have his momentand I looked over to him after a
(37:27):
couple minutes and he looked atme and he said, Wow, I can feel
it.
Like can you feel it?
I can feel it.
And when he said that I couldcertainly feel it.
My heart was pounding.
I could feel it.
As we're having thisconversation, I look over and
there's a young woman beingbaptized in the tub right next
to us.
Family members lining up to hugher.
Complete strangers in her room,teary-eyed.
(37:50):
A full band singing.
It's impossible not to beovercome with the Holy Spirit in
this time.
My wife arrives and joins us byour sides, the three of us
together, worshiping, praying,living, experiencing.
They begin the service, and it'soh so powerful, and we're loving
(38:12):
every second of it.
My wife gets a phone call thatPaisley's yet again getting
kicked out of class.
She goes and gets Paisley,brings her back, and there she
is.
There we are.
I'm holding my beautiful babygirl.
I'm holding my daughter next tomy wife, next to my brother, in
the house of God, all worshipingtogether.
(38:35):
I'm saying these things, and Ihope that you're feeling these
things, because these are thingsthat I never could have
imagined, these are things thatI never could have believed.
My brother spent 15 years in thefederal penitentiary.
I had my doubts each and everyday if I'd ever see him again.
Me and my wife have been marriedfor nearly 10 years.
We've been together for 13years, and I question whether
she would ever meet the man thatI grew up idolizing.
(38:57):
We've had many ups and downsthroughout our lives.
I there was never a moment in mylife when I thought for one
second I would be sitting in achurch row with my baby girl and
my wife and my brother.
But here I am.
Why?
How?
Because of God.
That's why, that's how.
(39:17):
That is powerful.
That is a reason for you tobelieve.
That is an example for you tounderstand that you too will
find all glory in this life whenyou give glory in this life to
God.
Stephen Firick just asked us,what will we surrender to God?
I will surrender it all to Godbecause it is moving my life.
It is changing my life.
(39:39):
Because of these experiences,because of these instances,
because of these feelings,because of these goosebumps on
my arm, the hair staining onend, I truly know that I am not
nearly as far away from the lifeI want to live as I think I am.
I am in no way, shape, or formas far away from my goals as I
continue to convince myself Iam.
(40:00):
Because there is a bigger,bolder, more beautiful plan for
me just on the other side ofthis conversation, this
discussion, this doubt.
It was proven to me yet again.
At the end of the churchservice, another person comes
out and be baptized as they'resinging, and my baby girl's
(40:20):
there with her arms up, enjoyingevery minute of it.
And as we walk out of thechurch, my brother looks at me
and says, I could do this everysingle week with you.
Words and actions that I neverthought I would hear, and I
never thought I would see.
Not only for him, but for me.
(40:43):
All of that is possible becauseof God.
I live this life a little lessworried about what's gonna
happen because of the faith I'mreally beginning to lean into.
I hope this is there for youtoo.
(41:04):
We covered a lot of groundtoday.
We zigged and zagged and turnedaround today.
We were all over the road today.
We were touching we were mixingcardamoms today, mustard and
mayo, okay?
We were mixing the mustard andthe mayo because we were all
over the road today, but therewas a great positive story told
today.
I hope this message todayinspires you today, encourages
(41:28):
you today to be worried a littlebit less today, to judge
yourself just a little bit lesstoday, to compare yourself just
a little bit less today, and toconsider yourself blessed today.
I thank each and every one ofyou for tuning in today.
And I also thank you forsupporting my American dream
(41:50):
today.
Now go wash you filthy hand, youfilthy animals, savages, savage
animals.
I don't know.
I was trying to work in my outrowith home alone and I kind of
screwed it up, but we'll go withfilthy savage.
Wash your ass.
Love you.
Peace.
(42:11):
That's it, and that's all,Biggie Smalls.
If you're a Loud Proud Americanand you find yourself just
(42:32):
wanting more, find me on YouTubeand Facebook at Loud Proud
American or Face page, as mymama calls it.
If you're a fan of the GrahamCracker, you want to find me on
Instagram or all the kidstickety talkin' on the TikTok.
You can find me on both of thoseat loud underscore proud
(42:53):
underscore American.
Big old thank you to the boysfrom the gut truckers for the
background beats and the themesong to your podcast.
If you are enjoying what you'rehearing, track down the gut
(43:14):
truckers on Facebook Just SirGut Truckers.
Give that motherfucker a liketoo.
(43:40):
I truly thank you for supportingmy American dream.
Now go wash your fucking hands,you filthy savage.
On this week's episode of Share the Struggle
Podcast, its new struggles, itsnew challenges, but it's also
new traditions and new memories.
Together, we accept that we arenever as far away as we think we
are.
From living the life we want tolive, achieving and attaining
(00:22):
the goals we have for ourselves,and fulfilling that purpose that
was bestowed upon each and everyone of us.
That and more on this week'sepisode of Share the Struggle
Podcast.
Let me tell you something.
Everybody struggles.
The difference is some peoplechoose to go through it and some
choose to grow through it.
(00:42):
The choice is completely yours.
Which one you choose will have avery profound effect on the way
you live your life.
It's a struggle.
(01:05):
Uncomfortable conversations.
You are right where you need tobe.
(01:40):
What it do, what it do, what ithot.
Almighty.
Am I so excited to be back withyou?
Oh, it is true.
It is damn true.
Because I love you, baby boo.
Welcome to that podcast.
That perfectly, precisely,beautifully named podcast.
(02:04):
Share the struggle becauseeverybody struggles.
But we all have come to knowthat if you are courageous
enough, bold enough, transparentenough to share your stuff, then
you will motivate somebody else.
You will pull them through.
You will shine a light on themtoo.
(02:24):
Because everybody's strugglecontains seeds of hope, clues
for success, and opportunitiesfor togetherness.
There's positivity in ourstories.
There is strength and growth tobe learned, to be shared, to be
multiplied.
You just gotta tune in and shareit week after week, and you end
(02:47):
up doing something positive andperfect like us, which is 283
weeks of you and me.
Oh baby.
It is true.
283 consecutive weeks of you andme on this year podcast.
Find all things podcast relatedover to w share the struggle
podcast.com.
(03:08):
I don't know where that voicecame from, but hey, it's the
holidays, man.
We get freaky around theholidays.
Am I right?
unknown (03:15):
Whew.
SPEAKER_00 (03:17):
All my day ones, my loyal ones, the ones that have
been listening since all the wayback in July 2020.
Get your ones up.
I acknowledge you.
I appreciate you.
To all the noobs here, the newones, maybe this is your day
one.
I welcome you.
As we've been doing over thepast few weeks, we shout out a
few uh cities and states andsometimes countries that are
(03:38):
starting to tune in.
So this week, we got four noobsfor you that I want to welcome
to the show.
I want to say thank you fortuning into the show.
We got McKeesport, Pennsylvania.
Welcome to this positive,positive tribe we have growing
over here in McKeesport,Pennsylvania.
Welcome, Largo, Florida.
(03:58):
Come on in, Largo, Florida.
This one, Fargo, North Dakota.
Well, that was a show, wasn'tit?
I really want to go to Dakotasometime, man.
I really want to do um reallywant to do it.
I I would love to be a vendor inSturgis.
I wonder if I can someday makethat happen.
But welcome, Fargo, NorthDakota.
(04:21):
Also, welcome, Bruton, Alabama.
That's right, folks.
Roll tide.
We're starting to get a nicelittle little uh group, positive
vibe and tribe out there inBama.
I like it.
Pennsylvania, Florida, NorthDakota, Alabama.
I love each and every one ofyou.
Thank you for tuning in.
Thank you for listening in.
(04:42):
I truly, truly appreciate it.
I hope everybody out there isdoing so nice.
We got Thanksgiving behind us.
Christmas is fastly approachingus.
I'm just gonna tell y'all,Christmas is coming quick this
year, man.
I think because Thanksgiving waslike right at the end of
November, you feel like you havea like one less week when it
(05:04):
comes to uh shopping and stuff,man.
I was looking at the calendarand realized, shoot, we're
getting pretty damn close toChristmas.
Y'all better stopprocrastinating.
You better stop waiting.
You better hurry up and get onover to LauProudAmerican.shop
before we sell out of all thepopular items that we have in
stock.
You better get over there, man.
(05:24):
We got daily deals all the time.
Right now we have our uminfamous, famous Savage t-shirt
on sale for 20 bucks.
We've got a multitude oft-shirts that are normally$27.
Buy two for$50,$400,$400.
We've got hoodies on there for$40,$50,$50.
I'm telling you right now,folks, there's deals over there.
(05:44):
Get on over there,LauProudAmerican.shop.
You have time to purchaseyourself something and get it in
time for Christmas.
So don't miss out.
Also, keep your beauty littleeyes peeled.
They're probably gonna startdoing a lot more lives as the
holidays are getting closer.
So you'll find us out therespreading the good love and the
good gospel of proudly made inAmerica Christmas gifts, which I
(06:07):
think are the best gifts togive.
You know what I'm saying?
Just the best gifts to give.
Speaking of giving gifts, um,today I actually went on a quick
little excursion to pick up a umgift for the wife.
Something I actually found onFacebook Marketplace, and it
goes along with uh like a littletheme I'm establishing for the
(06:29):
wife here.
And uh this year, we're notgoing crazy on Christmas, we're
focusing on the little one anduh enjoying the time that we
have and and her excitement andjoy and wonderment.
But uh obviously we want to dosome special things for each
other, and today I I foundsomething on Marketplace that I
really wanted to get, and uh itwas a cool little impromptu
(06:51):
adventure, and there's a reasonwhy I'm telling you this, but uh
today is Daddy Daughter Day.
Um I get up at about five in themorning, I bring my mom to work,
then I come home, I work for alittle bit, Allie gets up, she
goes to work, and then um me andPaisley have the afternoon
together or the morning andafternoon, then we go pick up me
and Ma together at the store.
(07:12):
So today I was getting ready toleave, and my brother uh called
me and said, Hey man, where areyou going?
And I was like, Oh, I'm justgonna go pick up Ma and I got
this little errand to run if youwant to tag along.
So he came with, and uh, so itwas me and Paisley and my
brother, my brother Charlie, andthen we went and picked my mom
up at work, and I said, Well,surprise, we're going on a
(07:32):
little road trip here.
So the three of us with thelittle one, we headed out, and
uh I I honestly can't tell youthe last time we did something
like that together, the lasttime we've really just sat down
together and just talked thatlong, you know what I mean?
And if you guys have beenlistening week after week, you
(07:55):
understand my brother justfinished a 15-year prison
sentence, and uh we're startingto do some things, you know,
again.
Uh, or we're starting to, insome cases, do things for the
first time, which is reallywhere I want to head to today,
but I want to easy into it.
I want to trickle our way intoit by sharing this little story
(08:16):
first.
It's pretty cool the fact thatthe three of us with my little
baby girl are out on anadventure to get something for
my wife for Christmas.
So I find myself being a littlenostalgic in the vehicle and
thinking, here I am Christmasshopping for my wife with my
daughter, with her grandmother,aka Mima, and her uncle.
(08:41):
And you start to trace that downand think about my mother
saying, Here I am shopping formy daughter-in-law, with my two
sons and my granddaughter, mybrother who's been behind bars
for 15 years, saying, I'm on anadventure with my brother, my
mother, and my niece.
When you start thinking abouteverybody's perspective and
(09:04):
opinions and feelings from eachdifferent seat in the deniali,
you start to think about life alittle bit different.
So having those moments ofreflection, it makes you feel
really good because this littlecircle we have has been missing
limbs off the tree, has beenlosing limbs off the tree.
(09:28):
I know if you're tuning in forthe first time, then maybe this
episode's gonna leave you justcurious enough to go back and
listen to all the episodes toclue you in on what's been going
on in this crazy life and worldthat we live.
Because over the past few yearsI've I've lost my father.
I've lost my grandmother, I'velost my grandfather, I've lost
(09:51):
two of my brothers, some of mybest friends.
I've been disowned and cut offby family.
We've chosen to disown and cutoff family.
This tree begins to be a bit ofa pole with very few branches on
said tree.
It's a whole different feelinghaving some of those branches
(10:13):
back.
And spending this time issomething that I'm still not
used to.
And last week we talked aboutsome of the things that I want,
what I want for my brother, whatI want for my wife and for my
daughter, those relationships,those connections, what I want
for them.
It's pretty surreal toexperience them.
(10:33):
And I've seen some some bigchanges in my brother, some big
changes in the way he thinks andlooks at things, and it gives me
encouragement for him and hisdirection and his ability to
regain the life he lost and livethe life that he deserves.
So today, as we're out on thislittle journey to buy something
for for Ali for Christmas, we'rejust kind of sharing some
(10:57):
stories and reflecting.
I look up, coming right at thevehicle, right at the SUV.
I see big, bold, beautiful, asbright and majestic as can
possibly be.
This amazing bald eagle.
(11:19):
I couldn't believe it.
This beautiful, amazing,majestic bald eagle, full
spread, soaring right at us, andthen swooping up in the air and
just circling over us.
I yelled to my mom, and shelooked at it, and we both just
stared at it as much as we couldas we were driving by and he was
(11:43):
soaring off into the sky, and weknew at that moment how proud my
father is that we're gettingthis unit back together.
We knew at that moment the factthat my father was also in that
vehicle today.
There wasn't just four seats,there wasn't just four opinions
(12:04):
and perspectives, there werefive.
And it has been validated to usby multiple mediums and and just
by our own intuition and feelingthat my father comes back as an
eagle when he wants to make hispresence known, he comes back as
(12:28):
an eagle.
And today, when we were out onthis Christmas adventure, my
father joined us.
I get goosebumps, I getteary-eyed, and I get blessed
and thankful just thinking aboutit.
I know how much it meant to mymother to see that, and this was
(12:48):
one of the best, clearest,precise images of an eagle that
I've ever seen.
Like it was it was justgorgeous.
And every time I see my fatherback as an eagle, I always state
the case that to validate thisand to make it even more true, I
(13:09):
am a forty-two-year-old man, andin the first forty years of my
life, I think I've seen an eagletwice.
Since the passing of my fathertwo years ago, I've seen an
eagle fifteen, twenty times.
That to me, folks, is not acoincidence.
That made me feel good.
I've been struggling with somethings.
(13:29):
I think we all have our ownindividual struggles and battles
when it comes to the holidays.
I've been trying to be creativeon a lot of things, uh, selling
different things, offloading umstuff that I just, you know,
either I don't have a use for orI haven't used it enough.
And as of late, I've beengetting stood up and uh let down
(13:52):
by marketplace.
I've had countless peopletelling me that I'm on my way,
I'm coming to buy this, or I'llbe there tomorrow, and then
these people just don't show upand they don't respond, and they
get your hopes up and they getyou down.
Um, because every time I feellike I'm carving a path through
the forest of self-doubt anddebt and despair, every time I
(14:14):
think I'm carving that paththrough the forest, then that
that path just closes up, right?
More trees pop up, the fog setsin, the rain comes down, and
before you know it, I feel likeI'm back to ground zero.
When it feels like those billscontinue to stack, the ability
to pay them begins to lack, whenthose tipping moments in life,
(14:39):
when they happen, when you getyourself in the position where
things aren't getting paid ontime, and you're getting through
and you're pulling through, butyou're using every ounce of uh
of will and strength andcreativity possible.
You have these moments where youcan really doubt yourself.
You can really doubt yourdirection, you can begin to
(15:00):
think about giving up on yourdream, you can begin to think
about changing your direction,and something like today happens
that shows you you're not alone,you are on the right path.
There's been some things thathave happened over the past few
days to prove to me to continueon this here path.
(15:22):
This morning, while I wasworking in the office, I was
listening to uh some previous uhsermons on uh on YouTube um from
this uh this this church andthis um pastor that I really
enjoy, Stephen Furtick fromElevation Church.
I find myself listening to himquite often, and this morning he
(15:46):
delivered a message, which thegreat thing about this message
is that it wasn't a sermon thathe gave like today or yesterday.
I think it was from months oryears ago.
I didn't even pay attention, butit found me today, and one of
the things that he said today isyou're never as far away as you
(16:06):
think you are.
You see, we often feel thatthose goals, those hopes, those
dreams, those aspirations, thatlife we want to live, the things
we want to attain, we feel likeit is so far away.
But in truth, they're never asfar away as we think we they
are, because it's not our plan.
(16:29):
It's God's plan.
And we are right where we aresupposed to be.
We are where we need to be.
And it's so hard for us tounderstand how close our hopes,
dreams, aspirations, and mostimportantly, purpose, the
purpose that we're supposed tofulfill, we have a hard time
understanding how close thosethings are because it's not our
(16:51):
plan.
We think we have a plan for somany things in this life.
I think that there's a plan formy business, and I have these
goals, and I try to forecastthese things for this business,
but I'm unaware of the fact ofwhat God's actual plan is for me
and this business, and just howclose I am to realizing that
(17:13):
plan, to experiencing that plan,to stepping into and fulfilling
my purpose.
We are never as far away in lifefrom the things that we hope
for, that we pray for, that wedesire for, that we are meant
for.
We're never as far away fromthose things as we think we are.
(17:33):
Those things can all come to usovernight.
Those things can all come to usbefore we know it.
We need to unite and hold fastto a common spiritual belief
that despite the fact that wemight feel lost, that we might
be distant, or we're makingmistakes, we are always within
(17:54):
reach of divine love andpurpose, with God's bigger,
better plan unfolding eventhrough setbacks and preparing
us for something bigger, forsomething greater than we
ourselves can imagine.
Sometimes we go through thehurt, sometimes we go through
the doubt, sometimes we losesight, we think it's never going
(18:17):
to work out.
But we must emphasize and trustin his timing and his wisdom
over our own limited view.
We are never as far away fromthe life that we want, from
fulfilling and living in ourpurpose.
We are never as far away as wethink we are.
I did a little research on thisquote today because it motivated
(18:40):
me today.
And there's a few keys that comeinto play with this message.
Number one, divine presence.
You can never go too far awayfrom God's reach.
His love is infinite and alwaysavailable, no matter how lost
you feel.
He's always there for us.
(19:02):
We always have the opportunityto lean into his presence.
There's a bigger picture, butseems like failure or delay is
often part of a larger, unseenplan, preparing you for future
blessings and divine purpose.
There was another speech that Ilistened to from uh Steven that
(19:24):
I listened to months ago, butit's coming to me right now as
we're having this conversationbecause it really goes in line
with that bigger picture.
What seems like failure or delayis often part of a larger,
unseen plan preparing you forfuture blessings or divine
purpose.
He was discussing the fact thatthere's going to be times in
your life where you'restruggling, where you're down,
(19:47):
where you're out, where you'refeeling defeated, when you're
you're overly depleted, and youfind a way to pull yourself
through.
No matter how difficult, nomatter how painful, you find a
way to pull yourself through,and you tell yourself, I'm never
going back.
To that, I never want toexperience that again.
And oftentimes when we findourselves in these situations,
we find ourselves with thesebattles and these struggles, we
(20:10):
come out of it and say, Man, Ireally wish I didn't have to go
through that.
And there's nothing good thatcame of that.
You know, like when we gothrough things in life, we often
say, like, oh well, there's areason for it.
And uh, you know, um, I learnedthis lesson from it.
But sometimes we go through sucha shitty situation that you come
(20:33):
out of it and say, There's noway that was worth it.
There's no way that um wassomething that I needed to
experience.
But that is because we cannotsee the bigger picture.
What seems like failure, whatseems like delay, what seems
like never-ending struggle anddespair, it is actually a lesson
(20:58):
that will help you in thefuture.
Because there's going to be atime in life where you encounter
something similar, or you findyourself in a situation where
life is crashing down, and maybeeven just the smallest
confidence that you can musterup is the fact that you can
reflect on this time that we'rediscussing when we came through
(21:20):
that scenario.
When you start to think back toit and say, remember how
difficult that was?
Remember how down on the dumps Iwas, remember how I thought
everything around me was overand it was all coming to an end.
I pulled through because of thatexperience of pulling through.
I know that I possess theability to pull through yet
(21:40):
again.
There's a lesson from the factthat I made it through the
lowest of lows, that whateverthe low is I faced today, it
wasn't what I faced yesterday.
You're building confidence.
You're building, I like toconsider them confidence
calluses, right?
I'm I'm calling myself withconfidence, these layers of
(22:03):
confidence that all as manytimes as I fail, as many times
as this business leaves me goingthrough the count cushions for
change to survive, as many timesas that happens in my life, I'm
callusing myself and I'm findingconfidence.
And those years of calluses andthe struggle and the despair has
(22:24):
me at a position right now whereI can look myself in the mirror
and say, You don't know wherethose payments are coming from
today, this morning, as I lookin the mirror, but we ain't made
it to lunch yet, and we ain'tmade it to dinner yet.
You understand what I'm saying?
There's opportunity.
So we, as the message says,can't always see the bigger
(22:47):
picture.
And that these failures, thesedifficulties in our life, they
are lessons.
And if you listen to thepodcast, you always hear me say,
sprinkle time and distance onit, and it all makes sense.
Sometimes the struggles makesense when we sprinkle two
months, two years, twenty yearsdown the road and realize I'm
(23:11):
conditioned for this, I've beenthrough this.
The next tip I found today istrust and surrender.
The core message of what Stephensaid to us is that if you
surrender your limited plans toGod's perfect higher plan,
trusting that He sees the wholepath and knows what's best,
(23:32):
followed by preparation.
Difficult seasons, loneliness,or feeling buried are seen as
planting and preparation,building character and strength
for what's to come.
Those are those confidencecalluses that I just spoke of.
Those are four keys.
The four pillars to that messagefrom Stephen Divine presence,
(23:56):
bigger picture, trust andsurrender, and preparation.
We're going through it, folks.
We're growing through it.
We have been struggling in thisworld, in this life for years.
I can confidently say right now,today, each and every one of you
listening and myself speaking,we have all struggled this year.
(24:17):
We have all had varying degreesof struggle this year.
This might be your worst year,this might be your best year,
but this year was not free ofstruggle.
Those struggles, those failures,those mistakes, those things are
not telling you that you'reslipping further and further
away from your goals, yourhopes, your dreams, your
(24:40):
aspirations.
Those things, those struggles,those failures, they're not you
slipping further away.
They're you realizing four keythings divine presence, bigger
picture, trust and surrender,and preparation.
You are being taught four keylessons.
(25:00):
Learning those lessons, in fact,are bringing you, are pulling
you closer to your goals.
They are bringing you closer tothe life you want to live.
They are getting you closer toliving and fulfilling your
purpose.
We are never as far away as wethink we are.
(25:23):
Right now you might findyourself thinking, okay, big
fella, that was an upliftinglittle message.
Unexpected, but uplifting.
Okay, okay, I think I'munderstanding.
I'm not gonna give up on mydreams.
I'm going to embrace my faith alittle bit more.
I'm going to encourage myself alittle bit more, and I'm going
to acknowledge I'm nowhere nearwhere I think I should be, but
(25:46):
that doesn't mean anything to mebecause my hopes and goals and
dreams, they might be rightaround the other corner to me.
I don't know.
We're never as far away as wethink we are.
Okay, great message.
But my question to you is whydid you have to take me to
church and why did you have todeliver this message?
Well, I'll answer that question,which is getting really odd
(26:10):
because I shouldn't bedelivering the message, asking
the questions, and answering thequestions.
This is getting strange.
People are going to start havingquestions about me and my own
disorders.
But there's nobody here to joinme and ask these questions.
But I'm just going to assumethat some of you listening are
probably saying, hey man, Ididn't sign up for church today.
(26:30):
Why are you coming at me likethat today?
And where is this message comingfrom in the first place?
Well, this message, number one,I think it came to me.
It was dropped upon me.
And it's really part of thestruggles and the things that
I'm going through.
And as we say week after week,we come on here and share the
struggles and the things thatwe're going through, the things
(26:51):
that we're growing through.
But I decided to deliver thismessage and have this
conversation today because Irealize this is a difficult
season for so many of us rightnow.
There's so many people that theholiday season just makes them
uncomfortable.
The holiday season makes them dothings they don't want to do.
(27:11):
How many of you are the socialbutterfly in the family that
enjoys the Christmasget-togethers versus how many of
you would just rather not go tothose all together?
There's a fair mix of you, I'msure.
To the ones of you listeningthat are the social butterflies
and you love the familyget-togethers, do you
(27:33):
acknowledge and realize andunderstand that there's people
in your family, in your circle,that would much rather not be
there?
That they would rather be homeby themselves.
If you're one of those peoplethat would rather be home by
yourself, then you know howdifficult these parties and
situations can be.
And I would beg to say thatthere's probably a multitude of
(27:56):
things you have to do during theholidays, and there's a good
handful of them that you reallywant to do.
And there might be one or two ofthem that you'd really rather
not do, no matter how sociallyyou are.
Because sometimes maybe it's thecompany Christmas party you have
to go to that makes youuncomfortable.
Maybe it's the in-laws that youdon't really get all warm and
cozy with.
(28:17):
Maybe it's your own family.
Maybe you're one of the peoplein the family that didn't quite
achieve all that your parentsthought you should achieve.
Or maybe you don't stack up toyour big brother Steve.
Or maybe, you know, SisterCheryl's always overachieving.
And maybe you're the one withoutthe kids, you're the one without
(28:39):
the husband.
You're the one without the dreamjob.
There's stress and anxiety, andthese all these things that
really come to the surfaceduring the holidays.
Because it's so easy for so manyof us to dismiss these feelings
and to not place ourselves inthe uncomfortable melting pot of
(29:00):
family and face our fears, toface our letdowns, to face the
fact that maybe we lost our jobthis year, maybe we went through
a breakup, maybe we are single,maybe we don't have kids.
There's so many difficult timesand discussions and experiences
(29:20):
that either you're going throughright now or you're about to go
through.
I wanted to have thisconversation weeks ahead of
Christmas because we're comingout of Thanksgiving.
Maybe you already had some ofthese uncomfortable situations
and you're not looking forwardto doing it again.
I'm here to feed you somecourage.
I'm here to feed you someconfidence.
(29:41):
I'm here to feed you with thefact that no matter how short
you feel when you stack up toBrother Steve, you, my friend,
are not as far away from Steveor the best version of you than
you think you are.
Give yourself credit.
Walk into whatever situation youhave to walk into like a boss.
(30:04):
You are you.
You're doing the best to be thebest version of you.
Maybe you're struggling, maybeyou're succeeding, but the truth
is you're a heck of a lot closerto where you want to be than you
think you are.
Don't go into this season whenit's supposed to be such an
(30:26):
uplifting, positive spiritualseason.
Don't go into it as a season ofdepression.
Go into it as a season of hope.
Acknowledge where you've beenand acknowledge that you're not
where you want to be, but thereis no way of telling just how
close you are.
(30:46):
I know this message was kind ofall over the place, but it
landed on me for a reason, and Iwanted to give it to you for a
reason because together we willget through the season.
There's layers of self-doubtduring the holidays, there's
layers of self-sabotage, there'slayers of endless debt during
(31:06):
this season.
We're all trying to figure out,you know, heating our homes,
feeding our families, affordingthe gifts, paying the bills, not
losing the car, and keeping thedreams alive.
We all have certain struggles.
None of us are free fromstruggle this time of the year.
That's why I felt it wasimportant to share this story
(31:29):
right here.
I also really, really, reallywant to emphasize the benefit of
leading into your faith.
I really want to sprinkle faithon this season of depression
that you might face.
I really want to emphasise faithif you're in the holiday spirit
(31:50):
and you're enjoying the holidayseason.
So no matter where you are, ifyou understand what I just said,
no matter how you're feelingabout this Christmas season,
whether you hate it, whether youlove it, there's more reason for
you to lean into your faith thisseason.
Why am I saying these things?
Why am I so confident in thesethings?
Well, I'm gonna give you oneprime example for all of these
(32:14):
things, and that example is justwhat the good Lord is doing for
me and my family this holidayseason.
As I started today's showtelling you the story of me and
my brother and my mother outshopping for my wife for
Christmas, encountering theeagle of my father.
(32:35):
I can tell you that on Sunday Idid something that I never
imagined possible.
I hinted towards it, I alludedto it in last week's episode of
the show without even knowing ifit would come true.
But on Sunday, we woke up and mymy wife and Paisley and my
(32:56):
brother Charlie all went tochurch as a family.
We went to church as a family.
Fifteen years ago when mybrother went to prison.
There was two things that Iknew.
I myself was a long ways awayfrom a church, and if I told him
(33:17):
I was going to church, he wouldhave probably just laughed in my
face.
Here we are, fifteen yearslater, a lot of life lived, a
lot of life missed.
But here we are together as afamily walking into church.
As a little boy, I rememberwalking onto athletic fields,
(33:40):
watching my brother with hishelmet and shoulder pads running
on the field.
As a little boy, I remember whenmy brother started driving on
his own and having his license,and he would bring me to the
mall, and I remember him walkingme around the mall and and and
showing me what it meant to berespected, what it meant to be
(34:06):
talked to like an adult, even asa child.
I remember these instances,these occurrences in my life
where I had looked to my brotheras a hero, when I looked to my
brother and was extremely proudof him.
For the first time since thosedays, I walked into church, I
(34:31):
stood in the aisle and I lookedover proud of my brother.
Walking in hand in hand tochurch as a family, something I
never imagined possible.
Was incredible.
God did that for us.
(34:52):
Allie brought Paisley to checkin to the little um like nursery
daycare classroom scenario.
And me and my brother stoodthere, waiting for Allie,
holding the seats, nice andclose to the stage, but back far
enough, sharing conversationthat I would never have
(35:17):
imagined.
We talked about someday gettingmy mother to come back to church
with us, and him telling me, I'mgonna tell her the same thing
about her that I told her aboutyou.
I just want to do things withyou again, man.
I spent 15 years without you.
I just want to spend time withyou.
(35:38):
Not in a bar, not at a club.
I just want to spend time withyou.
Get to know you again.
And he talked about reallywanting to embrace his faith.
He talked about conversationswith my mom about his faith.
He talked about finding a homewith his faith.
(36:01):
He talked about That's kind ofcrazy.
You guys just heard me um pauseright there.
I'm sure you heard me pause, andright before that pause, you
might have actually heard myphone go off.
But my phone just went off witha YouTube update from Steven
(36:22):
Furtick, who I'm speaking of,who was the motivator for this
conversation, who delivered themessage to me this morning.
You are not as far away as youthink you are.
My phone just lit up right now,and the post says, What will you
surrender to God?
(36:43):
Kinda funny, kinda fitting.
Here we are surrendering rightnow.
Needed to share that with youbecause it just popped up on my
phone in real time.
Me and my brother hadconversations that up until now
we weren't capable of having inour relationship.
I was proud of him.
(37:04):
We were standing there lookingaround, and he was like just in
awe.
I could see it in his face.
And he was excited.
He was he was joyful.
And the music started, and thecertain the service started, and
the band started singing.
And I let him have his momentand I looked over to him after a
(37:27):
couple minutes and he looked atme and he said, Wow, I can feel
it.
Like can you feel it?
I can feel it.
And when he said that I couldcertainly feel it.
My heart was pounding.
I could feel it.
As we're having thisconversation, I look over and
there's a young woman beingbaptized in the tub right next
to us.
Family members lining up to hugher.
Complete strangers in her room,teary-eyed.
(37:50):
A full band singing.
It's impossible not to beovercome with the Holy Spirit in
this time.
My wife arrives and joins us byour sides, the three of us
together, worshiping, praying,living, experiencing.
They begin the service, and it'soh so powerful, and we're loving
(38:12):
every second of it.
My wife gets a phone call thatPaisley's yet again getting
kicked out of class.
She goes and gets Paisley,brings her back, and there she
is.
There we are.
I'm holding my beautiful babygirl.
I'm holding my daughter next tomy wife, next to my brother, in
the house of God, all worshipingtogether.
(38:35):
I'm saying these things, and Ihope that you're feeling these
things, because these are thingsthat I never could have
imagined, these are things thatI never could have believed.
My brother spent 15 years in thefederal penitentiary.
I had my doubts each and everyday if I'd ever see him again.
Me and my wife have been marriedfor nearly 10 years.
We've been together for 13years, and I question whether
she would ever meet the man thatI grew up idolizing.
(38:57):
We've had many ups and downsthroughout our lives.
I there was never a moment in mylife when I thought for one
second I would be sitting in achurch row with my baby girl and
my wife and my brother.
But here I am.
Why?
How?
Because of God.
That's why, that's how.
(39:17):
That is powerful.
That is a reason for you tobelieve.
That is an example for you tounderstand that you too will
find all glory in this life whenyou give glory in this life to
God.
Stephen Firick just asked us,what will we surrender to God?
I will surrender it all to Godbecause it is moving my life.
It is changing my life.
(39:39):
Because of these experiences,because of these instances,
because of these feelings,because of these goosebumps on
my arm, the hair staining onend, I truly know that I am not
nearly as far away from the lifeI want to live as I think I am.
I am in no way, shape, or formas far away from my goals as I
continue to convince myself Iam.
(40:00):
Because there is a bigger,bolder, more beautiful plan for
me just on the other side ofthis conversation, this
discussion, this doubt.
It was proven to me yet again.
At the end of the churchservice, another person comes
out and be baptized as they'resinging, and my baby girl's
(40:20):
there with her arms up, enjoyingevery minute of it.
And as we walk out of thechurch, my brother looks at me
and says, I could do this everysingle week with you.
Words and actions that I neverthought I would hear, and I
never thought I would see.
Not only for him, but for me.
(40:43):
All of that is possible becauseof God.
I live this life a little lessworried about what's gonna
happen because of the faith I'mreally beginning to lean into.
I hope this is there for youtoo.
(41:04):
We covered a lot of groundtoday.
We zigged and zagged and turnedaround today.
We were all over the road today.
We were touching we were mixingcardamoms today, mustard and
mayo, okay?
We were mixing the mustard andthe mayo because we were all
over the road today, but therewas a great positive story told
today.
I hope this message todayinspires you today, encourages
(41:28):
you today to be worried a littlebit less today, to judge
yourself just a little bit lesstoday, to compare yourself just
a little bit less today, and toconsider yourself blessed today.
I thank each and every one ofyou for tuning in today.
And I also thank you forsupporting my American dream
(41:50):
today.
Now go wash you filthy hand, youfilthy animals, savages, savage
animals.
I don't know.
I was trying to work in my outrowith home alone and I kind of
screwed it up, but we'll go withfilthy savage.
Wash your ass.
Love you.
Peace.
(42:11):
That's it, and that's all,Biggie Smalls.
If you're a Loud Proud Americanand you find yourself just
(42:32):
wanting more, find me on YouTubeand Facebook at Loud Proud
American or Face page, as mymama calls it.
If you're a fan of the GrahamCracker, you want to find me on
Instagram or all the kidstickety talkin' on the TikTok.
You can find me on both of thoseat loud underscore proud
(42:53):
underscore American.
Big old thank you to the boysfrom the gut truckers for the
background beats and the themesong to your podcast.
If you are enjoying what you'rehearing, track down the gut
(43:14):
truckers on Facebook Just SirGut Truckers.
Give that motherfucker a liketoo.
(43:40):
I truly thank you for supportingmy American dream.
Now go wash your fucking hands,you filthy savage.
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