Season 2: Episode 10 - Born To Be Alive

Happy birthday Geminis & Happy Pride. You were born to be alive but are you living? Episodes released on Tuesdays or Fridays.

Episode Transcript

Darline Berrios (00:03):
Hey, everyone, welcome to Share Your Sparkle
and I'm your host, Dr. DarlineBerrios. This is season two,
Episode 10. Born to be Alive. Sopeople, guess what, today is my
birthday. I am 46 while I'mrecording a few days before, but
on Friday, June 11, I will be46. And I want to give a shout

(00:26):
out to all my Gemini buddies,including my sister, who was
born two years and six daysafter me. Everybody always
thinks she's older though.
Special shout out to her forbeing my only biological sister
in the world ever. So I couldn'thave asked for a better little

(00:51):
sister than her. So Happybirthday, everyone. And I chose
the title of this episode.
Because I was thinking back todifferent birthdays that I've
had. And I would say maybe like16 years ago, 16 or 17 years

(01:12):
ago, maybe 17 years ago, I wentup to Boston with a group of
friends to celebrate pride andHappy Pride. I want to go back
to pride in a second. And so wewere up there the event happened
to fall on my birthday weekend.
And it was What a great idea,right? It's Pride Month. It's my

(01:37):
birthday. So we headed up toBoston, and we were just walking
around and everybody was havinga good time. And I believe my
friends were off maybe getting adrink or something. And I was
just sitting there on a benchand some quote unquote, random
guy came up to me. And he startssinging, born to be alive. You

(01:58):
were born to be alive. And I waslike, I'm looking around, like
wondering what the heck ishappening. Like he wasn't trying
to hurt me or anything. He wasliterally singing these words to
me. And then he then he walkedaway. So I immediately told my,
my buddy who came back first andI was like, hey, this guy just

(02:22):
came up to me. And he's like,Oh, that's a song. And I was
like, What? I've never evenheard of it. I guess it's a song
that came out in the late 1970s.
Born to be alive. And he's like,yeah, it's a song. And that
person just came up to me astranger on my birthday, and

(02:44):
started singing. So I think thatwas a beautiful, happy birthday
from the universe, right? Soborn to be alive. You know, I'll
share a few things. Like mythoughts about life related to
the past 46 years. And I'll do areading and I'll wrap things up

(03:07):
so I can go celebrate me. Buthere's what I've learned so far.
One, I'm still learning, I guessI've learned so far that I'm
still learning to it goes byfast. Like I can close my eyes

(03:30):
and see my little three year oldself walking into preschool in
crying like a baby. Because Iwas so scared to leave my mom.
And then like, at the end ofday, I was crying like a baby
because I didn't want to leavebecause it was so much fun. I
mean, I think they had like thebest toys ever in preschool like
a little fake kitchen. Like allthese things to play with all

(03:53):
these kids to hang out with.
Yeah, so I mean, and that was,to me not too long ago doesn't
seem like it was four and a halfdecades ago. It goes by fast. I
can remember my little five yearold self in kindergarten.
Actually, the kindergartenclassroom that I went to is
probably within 15 minutes fromhere. And it's this round room

(04:14):
facing the playground. I justremember the posters with the
different colors, you know howlike, there's like the red, the
blue, the purple, and thenposters for math that have the
numbers, and then posters thathave the different shapes in
their names. And one day, Ithink I might have told the

(04:37):
story. My dad came to pick meup. And there might have been a
miscommunication between myparents. But like who was
because my mom usually picks meup but something must have
happened. And my dad showed upin his police uniform, and
everyone was in all like, wow,like who is this person? I'm
like, yep, that's my dad. So Iremember that little five year

(05:01):
old self.
I remember my high school self,Oh, geez, I just read my journal
from actually it was my earlycollege self, but my high school
self, my college self, like allthat stuff was not that long

(05:23):
ago. And let me just share twostories real quick. But I do for
my life coach, my littlebrother, Mikey, I'm sorry.
Because he totally helped methat summer between high school
and college because remember, Iwas training to for soccer for

(05:43):
preseason. And I didn't haveanyone to help me like, I just
did everything on my own, like Imade sure I like set up my own
routines like for practice myrunning routes, like my
different running routines, likeinterval running that I needed
to do, practice all theseskills. Because over the summer,
they had sent PC set a packageof the different things that

(06:05):
you're going to be expected todo. One of the things was when
you get back to campus or get tocampus, like if you wanted to
make the team you had to be ableto run two miles in under 14
minutes. So part of my trainingwas making sure I was fast,
right, you're at least able tomaintain a certain level of over
two miles. And my little brotherwould run with me but not run,

(06:28):
he would ride the bike I wouldrun and to have this actually
have a four mile route, but Icould break it up into a two
mile route. And the poor kid, Ican't remember at one point, but
he was you know, obviously likehelping me out like come on cha
you can do it. And I'm like,shut up. I just didn't want to

(06:51):
hear any talking like I wastrying to focus on my running.
And here he is trying toencourage me so about 30 years
later, I'm sorry, Mikey, you'rereally good buddy to have not
just then but now. So that's myhigh school self but my early
college self so I just gifted toa good friend of mine, her

(07:16):
daughters who want to graduated,but another one who graduated
last year from high school,they're going off to school this
fall a journal because I if youdon't journal, you should pick
up this practice. Like I'mtelling you, it's the best gift
that you can give to yourself.
So I first started journaling,January of nine, teen got 1994
so my first journal is from likeJanuary 1994, to about may 1994.

(07:41):
And that was my second year. I'msorry, my first year when I was
a freshman at PC secondsemester. And I reread it. And
what was really amazing about itwas that I was like, wow, I wish
I could talk like after I readthat I wish I could talk to my
18 year old self and kind ofjust tell her something's, like

(08:04):
tell her everything's gonna beokay. Like tell her Yeah, like
stuffs gonna happen, but you'llbe alright and like, and it
really turned into then me kindof finding my older self, and
giving myself right now a peptalk of sorts about life. But it
was really interesting. Soanother thing I learned, write

(08:26):
down stuff that happens becauseyou're not going to remember
everything you're not. But ifyou have something that you can
go back to that you've written,you'll be amazed at all the
things that you've missed, butthat you caught because you
wrote them down. Um, so Timeflies, right? It just goes by

(08:47):
really fast. I, I like I said,I'm 46 but I still feel like I
can remember my younger versionsof myself. What else can I tell
you about life that I'velearned? It can be a roller
coaster sometime, right? In agood and bad way. You know,

(09:10):
like, exciting, with differentthings and opportunities that
might come your way. But alsosad and painful. You know that
it's like this scary ride, youknow? So it isn't always great.
But somehow you find a way tomanage and keep going. Another

(09:33):
thing I've learned friends,finding and having true
friendships really make adifference in your life. I mean,
I'm talking about people whowill be honest with you, no
matter what, who will, you know,tell you the truth and who will
have fun with you along the way.

(09:59):
Right People that you can beyourself with and enjoy life
with friends, make some of thebiggest difference is or have
made some of the biggestdifferences in my life. Okay,
I'm a little little all over theplace. But the friend piece
reminded me of pride. And as Imentioned, there was one

(10:24):
birthday I spent, there mighthave been a few birthdays I
spent at pride, actually,because pride takes place in
June. I've done Boston pride,Providence pride, and San Diego
pride. that one, that one wasreally fun. I'm going back like

(10:44):
20 plus years for that one. Thatone was awesome. So if you don't
know the history of it, let mejust this is from USA Today
earlier this month. And I thinkpeople who just see some
advertisements or the rainbowflag, just think that it's just
a fun way to celebrate the LGBTQplus community. But let's break

(11:10):
it down a little bit here. Fordecades, it's been celebrated in
June in the United States. Oh, Iwould love to do some sort of
international pride. I think mycousin was saying that they
biked through pride somewhere inSpain once I would love to do
that. I got to put that on mybucket list. So it's parades and

(11:30):
events. And it draws it's tohonor sorry, LGBTQ voices and
experiences. And it's a way forour community and allies to get
together to celebrate eachother. So obviously, last year,
a lot of events were, you know,halted because of COVID. But

(11:52):
let's give you some historyhere. Why do we celebrate in
June? know their names Marsha P.
Johnson and Sylvia Rivera. Itall started with the Stonewall
uprising in New York City onJune 28 1969, following a police
invasion of a gay club locatedin Greenwich Village. Side note,

(12:12):
I believe there's a gay barcalled cubbyhole, which is so
cute and great. It's tiny. Hencethe name probably, if you've
never been before, I have noclue if it's I think they might
have some outside seating. Butif you're in New York City, I
highly recommend you check itout. But anyway, this is

(12:34):
different. Following a policeinvasion of a gay club located
in Greenwich Village. riots andprotests ensued throughout the
city. The majority of people atStonewall were either drag
queens or gay men of color. SoTitus Montalvo, a hairdresser
and makeup artists who was 16 atthe time, told USA Today's
delvin Brown so a majority ofthis or this started as a

(12:56):
protest with mostly drag queensor gay men of color. And at at
that time in New York City,quote unquote, masquerading as a
member of the opposite sex was acrime. Although trans dent
gender activist Marsha p Johnsondidn't arrive to the bar until
the riot writing had started.
Many credit Johnson for throwingthe first brick or shock class

(13:19):
that sparked the riots.
Regardless, Johnson and otherblack and Latinx transgender
women are now being recognizedand hailed another transgender
woman involved with SylviaRivera and activists and self
professed drag queen. Riverafought for transgender rights
alongside Johnson, co creatingstar, the street transvestite
action revolutionaries to helphomeless LGBT Q. youth. Rivera

(13:42):
died in 2002 and Johnson died in1992. Last year, it was
announced a monumentcommemorating both the women
would be built in New York'sGreenwich Village. The Stonewall
Inn was declared a historiclandmark by the City of New York
in 2015, and later named aNational Monument by President

(14:05):
Barack Obama in 2016. The Obamaalways doing the right thing.
Right. The Stonewall Riotssparked a shift an increase in
LGBTQ activism. However, morework for the transgender
community is still needed. In2021 13 transgender men and
women were killed. According tothe Human Rights Campaign. 12 of

(14:28):
the 13 kills were either blackLatinx or Asian. And it goes on
to talk about the history of youknow,
different flies because herpride there are different visual
representations of the movement.
And in Philadelphia, you know,typically we think about the
rainbow one but in 2017, blackand brown were added to promote

(14:51):
more diversity inclusion and tohonor the lives of black and
brown LGBTQ individuales so thenthere's, you know, the lesbian
flag, the trans flag. And that'sjust a little bit about pride
that it basically started as ariot with mostly transgender
individuals and gay, black andLatin x men in New York. So

(15:18):
that's that it kind of has avery different feel than what if
you've ever gone to one, what itmight have been like the first,
you know, during that Riot. Um,so what else have I learned? Let
me see here. Life is short. It'skind of crazy. Sometimes, oh,

(15:42):
you should get a dog. And atleast once in your lifetime, you
should experience a puppy.
Because they're out of control.
Out of control, like I'm talkingabout, like at 5am ready to
like, play. Like they have theenergy of an energizer bunny in
the most loving funny thingsever. So if you haven't had that

(16:08):
experience, you shoulddefinitely consider I mean,
unless you're allergic to dogs.
What else? Take care ofyourself. I mean, I always say
this, but you have to move yourbody, I do have to thank my

(16:29):
neighbor, who is graciouslyopened up her pool for Aqua
jogging. And it's great to getback into the pool. But if you
don't have access to a pool, youknow, walk, run. Do what ever it
is like some video or something.
Make sure you're moving yourbody, it really does make a
difference in the way your bloodflows. And the way you breathe

(16:53):
in the way that you experience.
Life. I'm telling you, it helpsyou out and sweat. I don't know
about you, but I need a goodsweat for it to count as a
workout. So for me like walkingand hiking, it's good. Don't get
me wrong. It's It's good. But Ineed like a good run. to sweat

(17:14):
stuff out. I guess that's waste,right? It gets waste out of your
body. That's what's what iswaste? Um, let's see, what else
have I learned? I think thebiggest thing is that I'm still
learning. And I still feel likea kid in this world. That I'm

(17:37):
still learning and I still feellike a kid. And the more or the
older I get. The more I'm tryingto remind myself stop like
stressing out about stuff. Let'ssay I only have, let's say I
only have, I don't even knowthree decades left to go. Who

(17:59):
knows, I have no clue, like howmuch time I have left. But in
this next phase in this nextpart, I need to figure out a way
to enjoy it. And to really makeit count. So if I'm born to be
alive, I need to make sure thatI'm living from born to be
alive. I need to make sure thatI'm living yes, we do die. Yes,

(18:24):
that will happen. But between mybirth, June 11 19 1975 to my
last breath whenever that is Ineed to make sure that I'm
living and for me living meanslaughing, loving, having fun,

(18:46):
and even through the bad justtrying to make the best out of
it. So are you living, even ifit's not your birthday? Today?
Are you living in how are youchoosing to live? If it's hard,

(19:07):
you know, sometimes people needto reset. Life does get hard.
Sometimes people need to resetby actually taking medicine
honestly. or moving or getting anew job. Or you know, I don't
know, however it is that youneed to reset. It's not a bad

(19:28):
thing. It's making sure you livelonger, right. I think the last
thing I'm going to end onis one of my favorite artists,
not artists, sorry, authors. Andyou know who it is right? All of
you know who it is. You betterknow by now. Reverend Deborah L.
Johnson. And she from yourdeepest intent writes Your world

(19:55):
needs more understanding. Yourworld needs more compassion,
your world needs a greater senseof harmony and unity. Your world
needs to be needs to move beyondthe wholesale labeling of some
people as good, and others asevil. It is the ones who
perceive themselves as good, whoin fact label the other one's

(20:18):
evil. However, as you well know,everyone is thinking the same
thing about the other. So theones who think they are good are
calling the other ones evil.
However, the ones that they arecalling evil perceive themselves
as being good and consider theother ones, those who think of
themselves as good to be theones who are truly evil, this is

(20:39):
a vicious cycle. The answer tothis dilemma is not will the
real evil one please stand upanymore than it is, will the
good one, please stand up. Lifeis not either or life is an end.
It is the and that you must beable to live with. What do I

(20:59):
mean when I say this, you are sobusy trying to distinguish
yourself from distinguisheddistinguished yourselves one
from another, that you get intoa tremendous amount of judgment
and condemnation about what eachother is doing. It is not your
place to judge. You can't tellwhat is really going on. in

(21:20):
someone else's life. You canbarely figure out what's going
on in your own life. You mustmove beyond the tendency to want
to draw opinions based uponlimited information. No matter
how much you think you may knowabout someone else's attitude,
feelings, actions or behavior,you still are not privy to the

(21:41):
private goings on of theirheart, which includes their
mind. Therefore it is incumbentupon you do not get stuck in
formulating and acting upon theopinions that you gather
strictly through your humanobservations. There's so much
more than that which meets theeye. As you will know, there are
at least two sides to everystory. And then there's the

(22:05):
truth. Well, we here we are hereto be about truth. If you're
deeply entrenched in your ownside, then that is evidence
enough that you have not foundthe truth. What is your deepest
intent? My children? What isyour deepest intent? Is your

(22:25):
intent to have a win win foreverybody? Is your intent to
embrace your fellow human beingsof all walks and stations in
life as equal to you in staturein nature? Is it your intent to
live the life that you have beenordained to live even before
this incarnation came intobeing? Is it your intent to be a
hard harbinger of goodwill andan ambassador of peace? Are you

(22:49):
willing to clear out the rubblethe weeds the thorns and
thistles in the rocks from yourown consciousness? So you may
create the fertile soil forthese seeds of oneness to
germinate and grow to completefruition? What exactly is your
intent? Remember that if youdon't have the intent of oneness

(23:10):
then you will always revert tothe default position which was
defined in the beginning of thisletter as duality. It is
duality. Ultimately, dualitydualistic thinking can only get
you so far. If you have broughtinto duet if you have bought
into dualistic thinking thenyou're fighting for your own
egos limited perspective of whatit needs to have what it needs

(23:34):
to perceive you. Sorry topreserve itself. There is a self
perpetuating quality here thatcannot be helped because of the
way the human psyche operates.
Understanding how the humanpsyche operates is strategic in
your ability to work with, aswell as overcome its
gravitational pull in ties.

(23:55):
Stand up for the oneness.
They're in is your salvationyour salvation is in the
oneness. Understanding that youare one with me, you understand
that you are one with eachother? You are one with the
universe You are one with yourown selves. Will you live in the
one? Don't answer too quickly.
But consider the deeperimplications. Why is it that

(24:20):
your human consciousness alwaysdeals in dualities? It deals in
dualities because it is in aconstant state of contrast and
comparison. It gets a sense ofwho it is by being able to
define what it is not.
oneness blurs the lines onenessmakes the distinction, less

(24:40):
distinct. oneness takes thebarriers away and leaves the ego
feeling helpless as well asnaked. The ego doesn't like to
be naked, the ego likes to becloaked in all of its armor and
garb. The ego has a verydifficult time surrendering to
the concept and the notion thatit is not something distinct,
discrete and therefore specialin the universe. It needs to it
needs to to localize itself andto have a sense of control over

(25:03):
its destiny. The onenessrequires a much different
approach approach. The onenessrequires that you see yourself
in everybody else, and that yousee everybody else within
yourself. The oneness requiresyou to understand that you live
across the whole continuum ofexpression. Each of you has the

(25:25):
capability of being a quoteunquote saint, and a quote
unquote, sinner. None of you areeither one exclusively, it's
just a question of how aware youare of yourselves in me, and how
much you allow that awareness toreign supreme in your life. What
are the implications of the factthat none of you is exclusively
saint or sinner, it means thatall of you have the capacity to

(25:49):
do or be anything. This takes usback to the concept of choice,
you have been given a choice.
This is a concept that many ofyou find difficult to accept,
you relish and revel in yoursense of choice, however, you're
angry with me for having givenit to you in the first place.
Too many of you would muchprefer a world in which no one

(26:09):
was able to make decisions thatcould be to the detriment of
anyone else. If I have the powerto do anything, you question Why
have I not used my power tobring about that thing? Jesus
posed a question in his day,which is still relevant today.
No you not. That you are God'smust understand that in order

(26:32):
for you to be the God that beganof me that you're, you must
choose to be it. You must havethe deep intent, you must be
willing to live in a place oftranscendence, above the push
and pull of the collective humanconsciousness upon your own
individual consciousness.

(26:55):
Without choice, you cannotcommit. Without choice, there is
no volition, no direction of thewill. To be the God gotten to me
that you are you must love. Youmust love more than the lovely
the lovable and those who loveyou. You must love the ones you
don't like the ones you have nogenuine affection for. Without

(27:18):
choice you cannot love beyond asense of commonality. To express
God like love human beings needto love with a gubbio love which
is a direction of one's will.
This is the intent to love. Youmust choose to direct your will

(27:40):
towards a doppio love. However,too many of you are allowing
your dualistic thinking toprevent you from choosing love
as an option. You say love as anoption for what? Love as an
option for everything. Do youunderstand what I'm saying? Love
is the answer to everything youask why Love is the answer to
everything. Love is the answerto everything because love is

(28:01):
the healing energy of theuniverse that overcomes the
energy of separation. It's thelove that brings everything back
to a state of unified wholeness.
When you are in a state of love,you are no longer experiencing
separation, the evidence ofdualistic consciousness you feel
at one with what you love. Thisis true whether you're talking

(28:23):
about some kind of chore,exercise, or assignment or
whether we're talking about somekind of interpersonal or
familial relationship. The moreyou love, the more connected you
feel. Conversely, the more youresist, the more distant and
strange you feel. And the moredifficult matters become. The
moment you allow love to creepinto the question, I mean

(28:45):
equation, he'll begin to seethat what you're stressing about
is not that big of a deal. Themoment you start to love, all of
the walls you have put up, startto come down. The moment you
start to love all of thosemountains, that you have created
in your consciousness, becomethe molehills, that they really

(29:07):
are. This is what scripturemeans when it says that you can
say to him oh and be removed.
This removal is a change in astate of in a state or
condition. When you love thestate and condition of a
mountain. In your mind, change.

(29:31):
So what do you want my children?
What do you want? Do you want tobe right? Do you want to stand
on your rightness?
Do you want to be able to saywithout any reservation or
hesitation who's going to heavenand who's going to hell do you
want to be so sure that you'reon my right side that you aren't
even concerned if anybody elseis on the left? What is your

(29:51):
real intent here? You reallyneed to think about this life as
a way of boomeranging backaround upon itself. If There's
no compassion in your heart foreveryone else. Well, that's what
you get to experience youreceive with the same measure
with what you give. Do you givecompassion? Do you give

(30:14):
forgiveness? Do you give love?
And do you give these thingsonly to those who you think
deserve it and or the ones youlike? What does it serve you
that? Just as it says, inScripture? What good does it
serve you to do things? If yourheart is not in the right place?
What good? does it serve you tobe standing on the street

(30:34):
corners and praying and making awhole lot of noise? Don't even
the hypocrites do that? Wheredoes that put you on the
spiritual ladder? No, no, no,until you can get used to the
fact that I don't love you. Anymore than I love anybody else.
You will never enter into mykingdom. Until you understand
that I do not elevate you asmuch as you elevate yourselves,

(30:56):
you will not enter into mykingdom until you are unwilling
to identify with the ones thatyou despise. As your brothers
and sisters in me, you will notenter into the kingdom. And
people I don't believe kingdomis in reference to like, again,
I think it's a state of mind,right? A consciousness. That's

(31:20):
what it seems like. This is allabout that I've been reading
about lately. So on that note,Happy. Happy Friday. You say
until next time, except yoursparkle, surrender to it and

(31:43):
allow it to be so until then.
keep shining