After heartache & confusion comes peace & self discovery w/ Briana Bermudez

Ever wondered what it’s like to co-parent with an ex while navigating the twists and turns of past relationships and new dynamics? Join us as we welcome the incredibly authentic and hilarious Brianna, a TikTok star who doesn’t hold back. From a chance meeting outside a club that sparked an 11-year saga, to juggling three kids and dealing with the complexities of her baby daddy’s current girlfriend, Sierra, Brianna shares it all. Brace yourself for some wild WTH moments and heartfelt insights into the rollercoaster of co-parenting and maintaining a family unit against the odds.

Have you ever considered the intricacies of a poly relationship, only to discover it’s more complicated than expected? Our host opens up about a relationship triangle involving her, her baby daddy, and his other partner. Despite past physical altercations and the baby daddy’s narcissistic antics, there’s a surprising bond formed between the women. The discussion sheds light on the challenges of setting boundaries, the importance of self-respect, and the sometimes contentious road to moving forward. The conversation is a testament to the strength required to navigate such tangled relationships while prioritizing personal growth and children’s well-being.

On a more spiritual note, the episode wraps up with a deep dive into personal transformation and faith. We discuss the power of reclaiming one’s life, setting boundaries, and the unique journey everyone takes toward spiritual growth. With compelling personal anecdotes, we emphasize that no one needs to be perfect to seek solace in faith. Whether you’re at your lowest or celebrating your best days, the message is clear: faith is accessible to everyone, and the journey itself is what truly matters. This episode is packed with real-life stories, heartfelt moments, and wisdom on setting a positive example for our children. Tune in and be inspired by the bravery of our guests as they share their paths to empowerment.

Hey SBC supporters! Want to connect with us ? You can send us a text message.

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
She bowed, she reeled and she's definitely ready.
Hey guys, welcome back toanother episode of the she Bowed
Crew Podcast.
It's your girl, smiley B andEva G, and we are back with

(00:23):
another bow episode and today wehave another guest.
Y'all we told y'all we weregoing to keep coming back with
guests after guests, and sowe're excited to introduce Miss
Brianna.
Miss Brianna, you want to goahead and introduce yourself,
give a little intro to thelisteners intro to the listeners

(00:47):
.

Speaker 3 (00:47):
Okay, hi, everybody.

Speaker 1 (00:48):
My name is brianna um you may know me from tiktok for
being in my baby daddy sidelineand um, yeah, not the baby
daddy, sideline you so funny.
So, yes, guys, um, as briannasaid, I did come across her
profile on tiktok and baby girlkeeps me laughing like hilarious
, like her personality is justso raw, authentic and funny at

(01:09):
the same time.
It's insane.
So I reached out and wanted to,um, definitely get to know you,
chat with you and have you onto the podcast.
Um, so, in the beginning, likewe always say, we always do a
WTH moment, so did you have aWTH moment you'd like to share
with the listeners?

Speaker 3 (01:28):
Yeah.
So basically the moment I'mgoing to be sharing with y'all
is what it's like co-parentingwith my baby daddy.
So my baby daddy called me upand he gets the kids on Mondays
and he's like, hey, if I don'tget the kids this Monday, can I
pay you $500 to get the kids.
I was like, okay, well, I ain'tnever been paid to babysit my
own kids before, but I'll biteand it gets better.

(01:49):
So then he's like, oh, but thenI remember I owe back child
support, so I'm not gonna giveyou the 500, I'm gonna just pay
it to child support.

Speaker 1 (01:57):
What the hell, that's crazy.
So you're not gonna give me themoney you offered to give me
the money then you're gonna giveit to child support.
So you're really looking outfor yourself, because back child
support gonna get you rightright me right, oh wow, see that
, how do you?

Speaker 2 (02:16):
because my how do you handle stuff like that?

Speaker 3 (02:18):
like do you get to hollering and cussing him out,
like nope, see, the thing aboutit is, I've always had my kids
full time and I don't look at mybaby daddy as a 50 50 parent,
because he never held 50 percentof the weight.
So I'll be prepared to watch mykids full time and if he does
get the kids on monday, thengreat, but if he don't, mama
goddamn.

Speaker 1 (02:36):
The routine is gonna go on just like normal, okay
period, kind of give us somebackground on your, your bd and
how y'all met and all of that.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
All right.
So how I met my baby daddy?
Me and my baby daddy have beendealing with each other for 11
years.
Don't pick up men from the club.
This is how it's going to endup.
Don't recommend so.
I met my baby daddy outside of aclub and once we started
talking, we just kind of neverstopped.
I actually did go to prison fortwo years.
When I came home from prison iswhen we had kids.
While I was in prison, he metthe woman that he's with now,

(03:09):
sierra.
So ever since I came home fromprison that's been about seven
years ago it's been back andforth between me, sierra, me,
sierra, me, sierra.
As soon as I came home fromprison, I got pregnant with my
first son, which is now five.
At that time he was with Sierra, but I didn't know.
So he broke up with Sierra.
He came home.
We started raising our son.
We broke up again.
He went back to Sierra.

(03:29):
He came back.
I got pregnant with my daughter.
We broke up again.
He went back.
This last time that he wentback we've been broken up pretty
consistently, other than ourMonday visits If y'all haven't
seen that video on my page yet,monday visits are my baby daddy
coming to pick up the kids andus being just, you know, a
little extra friendly on themonday visits, and that's how I
conceived my third child, whichis jackaroo.

(03:51):
Um, yeah, so where I'm at now,my baby daddy, we, we just
co-parent.
We don't talk at all.
Um, I mean, we talk, like inregards to the kids, but we
don't have any more monday sneaka link.
We might plan a visit here andthen, um, but yeah, I try to
just let him live his best lifethis year oh yeah, that's
something that's a bit much.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Yeah, that's a.
How old are you?
28?
Yeah, 28, and that's the.
That was another reason why Iwanted to reach out, because I
know that on your videos you gota lot of people under there
like going in.
They're giving their opinions,they're shocked by just the
whole story.
But I was listening.
I always like to look at thebigger picture and I was like

(04:32):
listen to your videos and justkind of how you would talk and
I'm like this young lady they'relike thinking she's like very
naive and, you know, delusional,but you are.
You know you seem to be reallywise and like kind of really
understand the overall picture.
But it just seems like youstill was fighting for maybe
something that you know youwanted for your kids, which was

(04:55):
like maybe, like you know, a momand dad in the same household,
like a family.

Speaker 3 (04:59):
I think in the beginning, like when my baby
daddy first went to Sierra aftermy two kids and he was with
Sierra Definitely that's wherethe whole poly relationship came
in.
I don't know if y'all seen thatvideo where I went and asked my
baby daddy's girlfriend shewanted to be in a poly
relationship and we dragged thatfor like six, seven months
where he's telling me like, oh,we're gonna be in a poly, I'm

(05:21):
gonna get her going to leave her, we're going to figure it out.
And I was believing that.
So when we were sneaking around, I'm like, okay, well, this is
only temporary, becauseeventually we're all going to
live in one big house.
Um, I think that the moment forme when I realized that wasn't
true was when my baby daddy cameand picked me up from the
hospital with our third child.
He had Sierra in the car and inthat moment like the dynamic
just felt like, okay, this isyour girlfriend, I'm your baby

(05:43):
mama and I'm probably justoverplaying my role and being a
little delusional here.
And I think it changed fromthere.
And when I put the story out onTikTok, I think what TikTok
doesn't grasp.
When I put that story out onTikTok, I'm telling y'all about
something that I already wentthrough.
This is not what I'm goingthrough.
I'm telling y'all about what Ialready went through with my
baby daddy.

Speaker 1 (06:10):
Where about what I already went through with my
baby daddy.
Where I'm standing at today isnot what y'all are seeing being
told today that's stuff Ialready went through.
Yeah, no, that's superimportant Cause, like you said,
you know I've seen that videoand it was just a short clip.
It really didn't have anycontext to it.
Like nobody, it wasn't like youguys were having a conversation
there or whatever.
Like it was just like with yourtitle over it.
Like my baby daddy picked me upfrom the hospital with his
girlfriend in the car, so likehow was that ride?
Like were y'all talking?

(06:31):
It was that awkward.

Speaker 3 (06:32):
How was that ride?
How was that ride?
Okay, so when I first got inthe car, my first thing I looked
at her.
I said girl, why are you here?
And she was like, oh, I'm hereCause I can be.
I was like don't you got kidsto take care of?
Like you left your kids to comedeal with me and my baby daddy

(06:54):
and our kids.
Like do you just want to be apart of what?
we got going on so bad, right,um, and like I said, up until
this point, when I'm having thisconversation from her, I'm
coming from a point of me and mybaby daddy are together.
We have a secret relationshipand you just don't know what's
going on, um, and so I'm, likeyou know, telling her all this
stuff.
I told her she was our driver.
I was like you, you came downhere to be a driver and this is
really our relationship andwe're just trying to fit you in

(07:16):
it, like you, his businesspartner, um, but the car ride
was an hour long and at the endof the hour, she ended up
telling me, like what my babydaddy was telling her.
And when I spoke to her, like itjust I felt sorry for her.
I'm like you know what thisreally is, not your beef, it's
really not your problem, and I'mreally beefing with the wrong
person.
Like I allowed this man to tellme A, b and C and I believed it

(07:38):
, and it really has nothing todo with you because he's telling
you A, b and c so right and Ithink that that's important is
to have those conversations,because it's it's typically like
that.

Speaker 1 (07:48):
It's like they want to keep y'all at odds, so that
the man always wants to keep thewomen at odds, so that they
don't tell each other or get thescoop like or not, keep at odds
, sometimes just keep away like.

Speaker 2 (08:00):
Has he not had?
Was that like the firstconversation you and her had?

Speaker 3 (08:03):
no, it's not the first conversation me and her
had.
No, it's not the firstconversation me and her had.
I don't pick my baby daddy upfrom her house.
I walk in her house, pack mybaby daddy's stuff and put it in
my car.
Sierra knows who I am.
We are on first name basis.
She knows my voice.
She knows who I am, she knowsthe situation.
She knows that my baby daddy isalways going to be accessible
to me, whether it be arelationship, whether it be us
just having sex, whether it beus getting back together like

(08:26):
that ball is in my court.
When it comes to my baby daddy,I'm choosing to walk away
because I don't want to be inthe love triangle, no more.
At no point has my baby daddyever said, okay, I'm just not
gonna talk to my baby mommyanymore, like that's not the
case.
I am choosing to put a nocontact in place.
I choose to put thoseboundaries in place.
I chose to choose better formyself.

Speaker 1 (08:48):
I chose to choose me instead of waiting on this man
waiting for my turn, basicallybecause he's going to go back
and forth.
He's going to go back and forth.
We're just waiting on the turn.
Yeah, and that's so true.
And that's why it is importantto realize that and realize your
worth, because you do, you doas women.
I think that we forgetsometimes that we do have the
power, like we do have thecontrol over situations, and it
always seems like we don't,because we always forgive and go
back, and so it looks like oh,they're the ones like dangling

(09:11):
us.
You know, on a, on a string,they're dangling us.
But really we're danglingourselves until we get tired of
it and once we stop getting,once we get tired and fed up
with with the bs, we, we're theones that can be like no, we're
not doing this, no more.
I, if I, choose not to be apart of the circus, it's not
going to, you're not going tohave a full cast.

Speaker 2 (09:31):
Like I don't want to be a part.

Speaker 1 (09:33):
You can't do it anymore.
You know what I'm saying and Ithink that that's what's so
important and I feel like whenpeople see stories like yours
and of course it's oh kiki tosome people, or it's just a, you
know, a funny viral moment forpeople to look at but instead of
like talking down on you orjudging you, I feel like other
women should be, you know,championing you and uplifting
you Like baby girl, like youknow you got this, like you know

(09:55):
what I'm saying Like biggingyou up to leave situations,
instead of like just all thecomments.
And it be so crazy, becauseI'll be watching your response
to these comments and I'm likeshe does not really be giving
these, these comments, theenergy like that they be giving
her, and it's like they stillthey.
It's like they want to get youout of your character so bad.

Speaker 2 (10:17):
And I'm like, and that is just so wild to me
because but okay, I'm not gonnalie the whole driving together
an hour from the hospital.
That's wild.
But besides that, I mean justabout everybody I know has been,
you know, going through somelittle baby daddy, baby mama
drama, like it's not unheard of.
I know we all got a couplefriends that's been through that

(10:38):
too.
So you would think that youwould get a little bit of
sympathy from some peopleinstead of them just dragging it
like that.

Speaker 1 (10:46):
Yes, for sure.
Have you guys ever had any typeof physical altercation, you
and her?
Because I don't know-.

Speaker 3 (10:54):
No, she's scary.
She don't want to fight Girl.
I done ran that girl's car offthe road.
I done pulled up to her house.
I done chin, checked her.
She don't want to fight.
She don't want to fight.
She, she don't want to fight.
But the thing like she, she'snot even a confrontational
person.
If I was to send her, you know,a text message or the one time
I aired her phone number out onlive and people were calling her
, she's not a confrontationalperson and that's why, like
y'all always hear me say I callher sister wife because I don't

(11:17):
got no beef with her.
Just because my baby daddychoose to go back and forth
between me and you, girl, you'renot the problem, it could be
another girl, it's not you.
She's a great person.
She's great with my kids.
I've had heart-to-heartconversations with her.
I don't cried on her chestbefore like she's not the
problem, it's my baby daddy.
And I think a lot of women wantto face the energy towards the
other woman and it's not theother women.
Why are we mad at the otherwomen?

Speaker 1 (11:39):
right, no, so true.
And I know you say y'alldiscussed a poly relationship.
So why did that happen, likewhat you said?

Speaker 3 (11:47):
he was down for it.

Speaker 1 (11:47):
You were down for it, so was she not down for it?

Speaker 3 (11:50):
or like she didn't want to be in a poly
relationship.
She felt like she was enoughman for enough woman for my baby
daddy to handle on her on herown.
And, um, yeah, she, just shefelt like, you know, the poly
relationship was not a dynamicthat she wanted to be in at all.
She always feels like she's incompetition with me and a lot of
her insecurities come out whenit comes to me.
So it's not.

(12:10):
For me it was like okay, you'rea vegetable, I'm a fruit.
He loves us in different ways.
I wouldn't care if we lived inthe same household.
Girl, let's bust your billsdown.
But for her it's like no, Ican't, I can't do that.
Like it's just too insecure.
Why do you still?
want to be with her.
Why do you love her?

Speaker 1 (12:25):
like things like that right and it's probably a pride
thing because you and him havebeen dealing with each other for
so long and then y'all havethese three kids during the time
of their relationship on andoff, you know.
So she was dealing with him allof these years on and off and
you have all these kids, man.
So it's probably like she feelsas though like if I'm gonna do

(12:45):
a poly relationship, it ain'tgonna be with this woman that
you clearly won't leave alone,that you still love, that you
keep having kids.
Because do they have kidstogether?

Speaker 3 (12:53):
they don't.
She had an abortion um the sametime that I was pregnant with
my son.
Her son would have been her boyor girl would have been the
first, his first baby, and shenot got the abortion oh wow.

Speaker 1 (13:04):
And how old is she?
She's 25, I think.
25 or 26, yeah, so she's stilltrying to figure out her.

Speaker 2 (13:12):
She has a real bad.

Speaker 1 (13:14):
No, for real, like that's yeah, that's a different
type of love.

Speaker 3 (13:18):
That's the relationship, the relationship
that she has with my baby daddy.
That's her first love, likethat's her first relationship.
So all that narcissistic stuffthat he's doing with me, she's
eating it up.
She's like, oh, this man caresabout me, this man really loves
me.
I'm like, okay, girl so then youguys have been going back and
forth and doing the on and getoff again thing, like she's been

(13:39):
in this story for five years aswell seven, seven, seven seven
she was 20 21 when she met himshe got my baby daddy's name
tattooed on her body like threeor four times and he has her
name zero times, krisham, sorrywe went we went and got matching

(14:00):
tattoos he got mines, I got hiswhile they were living together
oh wow, and she knows that sheknows that and she never
confronts you or nothing shenever gets mad at you about

Speaker 1 (14:14):
anything.
So it sounds like you guys arein a poly relationship, but
she's just denying it.

Speaker 2 (14:21):
It's like she has it she's denying it.

Speaker 1 (14:25):
You know what I'm saying.
It's like if I was to call.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
I can call my daddy right now and I can tell him hey
, can you pull up, can you meetme at your grandma house?
Can I pull up to your house andmeet me at the spot?

Speaker 1 (14:37):
I'm not gonna get a no it's not gonna be no, and she
knows that and she decides tostay.
So it's like you're acceptingthat, you're giving, you're
allowing that.
Essentially, like you saidbefore, you know I I'm the one
who went no contact and I'm theone who's saying no.
So clearly, her staying in thesituation, she doesn't have any

(14:57):
kids with him, there's no ties.
It's like she, at this point is, is just accepting it yeah,
she's accepting it yeah wow.
So currently you guys are on nocontact, you and you and baby
daddy on no contact.

Speaker 3 (15:14):
Um, yes, and no, like we're not, we're not on no
funny shit right now.
Um so, like you know, I'm notplaying.
No sneak a link.
As y'all probably know, I gotmy own stuff going on um but we,
we, he, he's not blocked.
I'm not blocked, he's notblocked.
We can call each other, but wejust been on some co-parenting
stuff right now, and that'sanother thing I feel like she's
naive about, because she can seeit firsthand.

(15:34):
When I get in a relationship,when I move on, I'm done.
I don't talk to my baby daddy.
My baby daddy don't even try melike that.
If I'm in a relationship, I'min a relationship.
But sierra, my baby daddy takesthat relationship as a joke.
He don't respect thatrelationship.
Why would I?

Speaker 2 (15:49):
right no, and so you're you're currently in a
relationship or you're single.

Speaker 3 (15:54):
Now I am I am figuring it out because I am
talking to people okay okay yeah, so dating yeah, yeah okay and
um, so another thing that I'veseen.

Speaker 1 (16:15):
Well, I know you said that you know y'all met.
You met him in the club, y'allstarted talking, you went away.
Do you care to share?
Like, so how long did you do inprison?
Like how long were you away?

Speaker 3 (16:26):
I was in prison for two and a half years.
Um the first, like maybe sevenmonths that I was in prison, my
baby daddy was locked up as well, so we didn't have much contact
other than through other people, um, but once he got out of
jail he was there the whole restof my time with me.
He came to visitation onSaturdays, sometimes Saturday
and Sunday.
He had money on my books, hehad money on the phone.

(16:47):
Like I was none the wiser.
I did not find out about Sierrauntil I came home.
I was actually four monthspregnant with my son and my baby
daddy had a trap phone and whenI called Sierra she was like I
already know who you are.
Oh okay, but I didn't know whoshe was.
I didn't know that that's whomy baby daddy was dealing with.
And until I went through mybaby daddy phone did I find out

(17:09):
that Sierra was working onBackpage and he had linked up
with her to turn a trick, and itwas a bond that they just kept
going.
She started paying bills.
She was allowing him to dowhatever he wanted to do as long
as he was paying bills, andthat's where it started from,
wow.

Speaker 2 (17:25):
So he's where it started from Wow, so he's her
pimp, or was Okay?
Okay Now, um, you said that youguys were you and your baby dad
was locked up at the same time.
Was it two?
Was it separate things?

Speaker 3 (17:39):
Yeah, it was separate situations.

Speaker 1 (17:40):
Okay.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Wow.
So you both of you guys startedoff a relationship with him
that clearly nobody planned onit being like serious, or like
going any like you know kids, orbeing like now what?
10?

Speaker 3 (17:57):
so years later no, I mean, even now, me and my baby
daddy still talk about thefuture.
He still says that sierra istemporary, that he's just going
to get to where he wants to getto in life as far as, like,
getting his house and gettinghis car and getting financially
stable.
And he's sad to say, like, Iguess using Sierra for that or

(18:18):
whatever.
And I do feel like they have agood partnership.
Whatever they got going on,they work for each other.
The way that she drives himaround, the way that she, you
know pretty much like, enableshim to not be a grown man.
But, um, so he said that thesituation is temporary and that
when he gets to the point thathe wants to reach in life, that
he's going to come back to hiswife and his kids and he calls
me his wife and his kids are theonly kids that we share

(18:40):
together, are his and yeah.
So the way that I see it is, I'mjust living my best life.
I'm working on myself, tryingto be the best wife that I can
be for the person that Ieventually marry.
I'm cutting ties with my babydaddy because I'm not accepting
him being in a relationship withSierra but if later on down the
line, three, four or five yearsdown the line.
He's not with Sierra, I'm notwith anybody, and we choose to

(19:02):
get back together and getmarried.
That could still happen.
Like I don't hate my baby daddy, I don't think my baby daddy
hates me.
We're just not at the time inour life to be together right
now.

Speaker 1 (19:12):
Yeah, and that makes a lot of sense.
And it does take someone matureenough to reflect and say, okay
, let me look at this you knowsituation in hindsight and
figure out, like, what makes themost sense.
I think that we have to, incertain situations, just accept

(19:32):
what it is.
You know what I'm saying and,like you said, one of the key
things is, like he's I don'tknow exactly everybody has
different requirements for theirperson or who they want to be
with.
But if a man is showing youtime and time again that he's
not the man that you want to be,that you want to be with, but
if a man is showing you time andtime again that he's not the
man that you want to be, thatyou want to be with, and you
have to decide not to compromisethat, and I think that that's

(19:53):
so important for young girls andyoung women to understand like
we get so stuck up in.
Okay, you know he could change,or we can change them, and this
isn't that.
But a person has got to want tochange and they have to want to
change for themselves first andforemost.
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (20:09):
And how Sierra, how she even came back in the
pictures.
I broke up with my baby daddy,who's struggling with his own
addiction.
That's his story to tell and webroke up for that reason and
she came in and they weretogether.
If I didn't have any problemswith my baby daddy, if we had a
perfect relationship, we wouldstill be together.
And I had to remind myself thatand I feel like a lot of young

(20:31):
days need to hear this too Likewe have to remind ourselves on
why we chose to walk away in thefirst place.
Cause we start to get lonely andwe start to miss them, we start
to miss the comfort of theroutine that we created with
that person, and that's whatwe're.
All we're doing is missing whatused to be, and I had to wake
up and realize, like this is one.
This is not the man that I wantto be with.
If my baby daddy was to leavesierra and come to my house
right now, he cannot meet theexpectations that I have for my

(20:52):
future husband.
You just can't.
Little girl me does not wantwhat grown women you want yeah
and I met my baby daddy when Iwas 18.
So we're just not the same rightnow, and a lot of feeling like
I lost a battle or I lost astruggle by sierra taking him
that's a lot of what kept me ina way, longer than I should have
, fighting for a relationshipthat was way, way over, was

(21:14):
feeling like I didn't want tolose him.
And once I realized, like girl,he's losing me.
I'm the prize, I'm the one whoworks, fighting for the whole
dynamic change, and my babydaddy hates it because he ain't
got no control and that's good,that's what I love.

Speaker 1 (21:28):
I've seen that.
I've seen one of the videos andyou were saying that, like you
don't run nothing over here, youdon't have no control, and I'm
like, oh my gosh, I love that.
Like she's taking her power backand understanding that yes, you
ultimately have the control onhow you allow someone to treat

(21:49):
you or how you allow people toshow up in your life.
You know what I'm saying.
A person is always going toshow you who they are.
You have to believe them.
It's up to you to believe thatthat's who they are.

Speaker 3 (21:53):
We can, yeah, and you don't have to accept people if
they're not what you want themto be.
You don't have to be.
You don't have to have accessto me, like that's.
I'm big on that.
You don't have to have accessto me.
I literally charge $25 a phonecall for somebody to talk to me
for 30 minutes and you thinkyou're gonna stress me out on my
phone for free?
No, period.

Speaker 1 (22:10):
That's exactly the mindset that how it should be.
And I think that the fact thatyou display that and you show
that and you're so vulnerableand you can see you go through
from the beginning of just evenwith, like, your pregnancy, with
your, your last son, and thenlike how vulnerable you were and
how like hopeful you were forthat situation, and then to like

(22:33):
how you kind of like grew andthen had your baby and your
perspective kind of it's likeyou kind of gathered that
strength to be like no, so do,would you say, like having your
son and having your kids ingeneral and, you know, wanting
to set an example for them.
Will you say that that helpedyou to make these choices, like

(22:54):
look, I'm not doing this anymore, not just because of me and how
it's affecting me, but also mykids.

Speaker 3 (23:01):
Yeah, I think a lot of the one of the questions that
I often get on TikTok is peopleasking like, if it was your
daughter, what would you tellher?
It was your daughter, whatadvice would you give her?
And I'm big on I'm not going totell you to do something that I
wouldn't do.
So how could I tell my daughterto leave the man that's
treating her like that if Icouldn't leave the man that was
treating me like that?
So I'm big on that and that'swhy I feel like one of my posts

(23:22):
even one of my posts I think itwas one of my down days and
somebody commented on the post.
They were like girl get up, girlget up.
And it reminded me of thatSarah Jake Roberts seminar.
She had a whole seminarspeaking about getting up and
fighting depression and you'regoing through things and it just
gave me the courage.
Like you really have to believein yourself, you really have to
love yourself and get the devilout your head, because the
devil will tell you you're notworthy, he'll tell you you're

(23:44):
not good enough, he'll tell youto stay.
He'll tell you all the negativethings and you really just have
to pray and focus on your ownstrength, and that's another
thing that really helped me.
I'm big on my faith.

Speaker 1 (23:53):
Tiktok doesn't see a lot of that, but I go to church
every Sunday, I pray everymorning, every night, I pray
before I my journey with me andthat's, that's, honestly, what
gave me the strength to leave mybaby daddy, because you know my
man, god is my man, you don'tdo me wrong baby, god don't do
me wrong period and that wasanother admirable thing that I
witnessed on your platform wasthat you know you do show you

(24:16):
sometimes getting up and gettingready with your kids to go to
church and just you know, seeingyou, um with, you know building
that relationship with god andbecoming involved in the church.
That was very inspirationalbecause it's like a lot of times
we try all these things, we trytalking to friends and we try
to find what we're looking forin this man, in this and that

(24:37):
situation.
But it's like we have to tryGod sometimes.
And I'm telling you he willnever let you down.
He's going to give you thestrength.
He's going to give you thestrength.
He's going to give you theknowledge.
He's going to give you the love, the comfort, the peace,
everything that you're lookingfor in these worldly things and
people.
If you try, god, you will findall of those things and some,
and you will become more wise,more strong, and you, you like

(25:01):
what, like?
I had this in me the whole time.
You know what I'm saying.
It's like unlocking a power andfeeling like, you know,
unstoppable.
I mean I just and I love to seewhen young women, young men,
anybody, when anyone is able tounlock that and create that
intimate relationship with God,because when you're going
through situations like this,this is really the only way out.

(25:23):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 2 (25:25):
when you're going through situations like this
this is really the only way out.
You know what I'm saying and soa lot of times when you were
going through this stuff, I mean, I don't know if you have a lot
of family, if you're superclose with your family, if you
have, you know, some bestfriends and stuff like what.
Where were they?
Were they more so just lettingyou do your thing?
Were they giving you youropinion?

Speaker 3 (25:45):
Were they opinion?
Were they telling you there was, um, there was a period of time
when I was pregnant that Icouldn't afford my rent.
As y'all know my journey, I washomeless.
During that time when I washomeless, I was not local like I
was five hours away from any ofmy friends.
I was in a town that I was bornand raised in.
The only person I had was mymom.
She was a great support systemfor me throughout my pregnancy.
But it was hard battling mydepression, being alone,
homeless.
Homeless, like feeling like Ididn't have a job, I didn't have

(26:06):
a car, I didn't have a house,my social media wasn't even
taken off because I was toodepressed to post.
I was too depressed to dopromos, like it was just a
really black time for me and Ithink during that time my
friends did what they could.
They were a ear for me tolisten, like they were a ear for
me to talk to.
They were a shoulder for me tolean on, for me to lean on, but
nobody could be like here, girl,here's a house.
Here, girl, here's a car.
Nobody's going to grab my phoneand make me post content.

(26:30):
So friends and family can onlydo so much for somebody who's
not willing to do something forthemselves.
And that's where I was.
I was just so stuck in thatdepression Like I don't feel
like there's anything that anyof my friends or family could
have did different.
I literally just had to gothrough it.
But now that I'm back and I amback in the city with my family
and friends I have an amazingsupport system.
I don't post every singlemoment of my life.
There's so much that y'alldon't see.
When it comes to my kids, it'sall hands on deck.

(26:51):
I have a whole village and Ilove that for myself because it
keeps me from gettingoverwhelmed.
It keeps me from gettingstimulated.
I have my best friend who'swith me almost every day.

Speaker 1 (26:59):
She might as well be a paid personal assistant
because, like, it's just so muchI don't see behind the scenes
with the support system that Ihave yeah, that's amazing and
I'm glad that you hit on thefamily dynamic because I was
going to ask you know, a lot oftimes when we get older and we
get into relationships, whetherit's friendships or romantic
relationships, we kind of tendto mimic what we learned as a

(27:22):
child or just kind of notknowing where to start.
So, growing up, were both yourparents together.
What was the dynamic for you asa child growing up?

Speaker 3 (27:33):
Growing up.
My mom did eight years infederal prison.
My dad I didn't start reallyconnecting with until I was age
of 12.
So I was raised family memberto family member, never lived
anywhere longer than six months.
I went into DCF foster carewhen I was 12 years old.
I've been to four juvenileprograms ranging from 30 days to
14 months.
Like I had a pretty rough,traumatic childhood and I try to

(27:56):
take that and raise my kidsdifferent.
I go so hard for my kidsbecause of how I was raised and
I think I fought a little alittle harder to keep my family
together because I was raised ina separate family home.
Um, but what I have learned isthere's literally somebody out
there waiting for me, waiting tolove me and my kids, and it's
not their biological father.

(28:17):
And the more that I go throughthings, the more that I go
through things, I can't help butget this feeling inside of me
that God is shaping me to be thewoman that he needs.
Whoever my husband is girl, godis getting me ready for him and
that's why I don't waste mytime when people show me red
flags.
People show me they don't wantto be in a relationship with me.
I got to get y'all out the waybecause literally I know that my
man is out there.

Speaker 1 (28:37):
Yes, and I love that, I absolutely love that that was
so well said.
Like, at the end of the day,that is really what it is in.
This situation is shaping youin more ways than one, and
that's why people don'tunderstand.
It's like we're not going tounderstand everybody's journey
and every, every aspect of whatthey're going through.
To get you know where they'regoing, kind of try to gain an

(29:08):
understanding or just to youknow, pray for that person or
uplift that person, opposed tolike judging them or trying to
talk down on them Because, atthe end of the day, this is
going to make you a betterperson and, like I said, I seen
past all of the kicks andgiggles.
Like I think I've seen some ofyour videos and I think that you
are a very like you know, happy, giddy person.
You have a really greatpersonality, you're funny and I

(29:30):
feel like you know thissituation is shaping you and I
feel like in so many ways youhave grown, like I said, even
just from your past videos fromyou know, when you were first
pregnant, if you know movingforward, it's like can see, and
I feel like a lot of people missthat, it's like they're not,
they're missing the gems thatyou're dropping and they're just

(29:50):
there for the entertainmentpart.

Speaker 3 (29:52):
Like oh, okay what is she?

Speaker 1 (29:54):
what's she talking about?
This?
You know this time Like, or whoshe, what she got going on and
it's like wait, y'all not, y'alljust want to.
You know entertainment for themoment, but y'all not
understanding that.
Y'all witnessing, y'allwitnessing a miracle, y'all
witnessing somebody who'sbreaking generational curses,
that's going through atransformation and giving glory
to god while doing that.

Speaker 3 (30:14):
Yes, and I feel like one thing I want to get a
message across from my page ispeople see the imperfect journey
that I'm on.
I'm not perfect.
I still cuss, I still party, Istill drink, but I I go to
church every Sunday and I prayand I do get closer to God.
And I want somebody out thereto know that you don't have to
be perfect to be close to God.
You don't have to be walking astraight line to be close to God

(30:35):
.
My goal is to make you feel likeJesus is accessible to anyone.
He's accessible to thecrackhead on the corner, just
like he's accessible to themillionaire sitting up in the
mansion.
Like you don't have to be notype of perfect, you don't have
to be no type of special ritualor anything to get on your knees
and pray and to have god inyour corner.
And I'm I'm big on that.
A lot of people be like, oh mygod, you did this, but you go to

(30:56):
church and I do, and I do everysunday.
Like I'm big on that.
You don't have to live nocertain type of way, be no
certain type of way.
God literally says come as youare and through building a
relationship with him, you willchange.

Speaker 2 (31:08):
Correct, oh that was well said, that was a word, that
was a word.

Speaker 1 (31:15):
Yes, that was a word and that's perfectly saying and
my dad is a bishop and hepreaches that a lot Like people
always say, oh, when I get right, I'm going to come to God.

Speaker 2 (31:24):
I'm going to give my life to God.

Speaker 1 (31:25):
it's like no, there's no get right.
There's no, there's no type ofyou know status you have to have
or no type like you can come inthe darkest of your darkest
times, you can come in the bestof your best days.
There's no right fit to come toGod, to give your life to God
and create that relationship.
And I love that you said that,because my dad says that all the

(31:48):
time and I used to hear peoplesay that as a kid all the time
Like I'm going to get right, I'mgoing to come to God one day.
He know my heart, I'm going toget right with God.

Speaker 2 (31:55):
If you wait for that, it'll never happen yeah.

Speaker 1 (32:08):
And, like you, know that we're never going to be
perfect exactly exactly.
They say what he says it'seasier for a camel to pass
through the eye of a needle thana rich man to make it to heaven
.
Like you, people think that ohyou all, the most blessed people
are the ones with the money orthe lavish lifestyle.
But no, you know what?
I'm saying they're going to havethe hardest time because, at
the end of the day, it's whatyou value and what's important
and who you know if you'rereally working towards your
salvation.
So I think that is so importantand I love that and that's,

(32:30):
like I said, really why I wantedto speak with you.
I wanted to have you on becauseI'm like there's more to her
than these 30, 60 second clipsthat she gives.

Speaker 2 (32:39):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
And I feel like a lot of people.
Like I said, it's entertainingto some people, but it's like
this.
I see this as, like I say, asyou know, a transformation.
I see God working and that'swhat I see.

Speaker 2 (32:51):
You know the entertaining stuff that that
comes second.

Speaker 1 (32:54):
But I see I'm watching what the Lord is doing
and I love that.
It inspires me.
I'm like every it's just everytime I see someone who's going
through a transformation orgetting closer to God and I see
what he's doing, it's like I'mjust thankful.
I thank God, Thank you forallowing me to witness this.
This is just more reassurancethat you are who you said you
are yesterday, today and forever, and I think that that's

(33:17):
important and people don't seethat.

Speaker 2 (33:26):
And I'm just so happy that you're so brave enough to
share this story, because thereare so many, so many people go
through this like.
This is not, like I said, yourstory.
It's a few different details,but I know so many people going
through this right now and Ijust think it's so powerful for
people to hear you say like,look, it's when I decided enough
was enough you know what?

Speaker 3 (33:41):
I mean, and then it sounds like it's been going a
lot better for you like yes,every time I get my baby daddy
out the way, the blessings justbe pouring in, and that ain't
fine enough every time I getthem in out the way, like the
blessings is pouring in, pouringin, pouring in so like has he
ever said, because I know, like,like a lot of your videos go
viral, you get, you got a bigfollowing.

Speaker 1 (34:03):
So does he ever, like say anything about the videos,
because I know that he has tohave people come down like
you're, like they?

Speaker 2 (34:11):
have to be okay.

Speaker 1 (34:13):
So like what is his?

Speaker 3 (34:14):
what is his take on it like well you guys, he wants
you to know that he does take ashower because somebody had
posted on there talking about helooks like he don't take
showers.
So I asked him one night.
I was like I was on the phonefor like two hours.
He's like I know you're aboutto go inside and tell tick tock
that you was on phone me.
I said and I am.
He said do you want me to tellthem anything?
He's like let them know that Itake a shower.

(34:34):
And they're like okay, um, butother than that, like my baby
daddy, to know him, he's a veryhumble person, he's a very
non-confrontational person.
So he don't do social media.
He sees it and he's just likeokay, I don't know none of these
people in real life, I'm notgiving it no attention.
Like he don't pay that stuff,no mind.
The one post that he did makeon Facebook that I reshared from

(34:57):
my page, a whole bunch of myfollowers went to his Facebook
and like tried to, I guess,cancel him.
My baby daddy was like okay,whatever, he don't pay that
stuff, no mind, we know whathappens in real life and that's
all that matters.
Like I do post a lot and itmight seem like one thing, but
behind the scenes, y'all, we gotthis we co-parenting happy,
healthy kids.

Speaker 1 (35:17):
I know that's right and that's what matters.
You know, the kids are happy.
They get to have both of theirparents around, whether they're
in the same household or not,and, um, they get to see both of
y'all show up for them andthat's that's important.
I think that even in the themessy moments, even when you
know you, when y'all were goingthrough your stuff I remember in

(35:37):
one of your videos you werelike they're with their dad,
they're okay, you know, andeverybody's like oh, go, get,
your kids are.
This is that, and you're likethey're with their dad.
And I think that we have tonormalize that more as?
yeah, as you know, women we'realways expected to, just like
you said, be the 100 parent, butit's okay if we pull a them on
them.

(35:58):
It's okay if we, you know, dropthe kids off and we need you to
keep them an extra week orwhatever like, yeah, that's how
I had a whole video about yeahlike, there's like we need to
normalize that type of way aboutmy, my kids being with their
dad, which my mom is like you'rejust gonna leave them over
there.

Speaker 3 (36:13):
And I am and everybody on tiktok was giving
me grief about that and I, thatis big in my family, like my
family is not is a lot of women.
We have very few men in ourfamily and we're about a single
women raising kids and we'venormalized our kids, father just
leaving and we don't ask themto do nothing, we don't even put
them on child support andthat's normal in my family and
we see it as oh, that's a strongwoman, that's strength.

(36:35):
No, boo boo, I'm weak Like no.
My mom is like, just put him onchild support.
This man don't even got a job.
Did he get paid on the books?
I'm not fighting with nogovernment.
We don't even need all of that.
Get your kids Right.

Speaker 1 (36:54):
No, for sure, For sure, and it's like we just have
to hold them accountable.
My grandmother I feel like Itell my grandma that all the
time, like you're soold-fashioned because my
grandma's the same way.
She like I don't care if y'allon good terms.
My grandma always been like getthem on paper, get them on
child support, she don't care.
She like I don't care if y'alltogether that he need to be
paying child support and mygrandma's just like that.

(37:15):
You know, my grandma's 90, soshe's like but, like you said,
it's just that, that dynamicthat they've just been used to
like as mothers, we we notcounting on them for nothing.
They can walk out any day.
But, it's like no, we need tohold them accountable.
We've also made that an okaything, Like, yeah, if y'all walk
out, we got this, we got thisyeah we got this, but I don't
want to have to have this.

Speaker 3 (37:34):
Like I want it to be.
I tell my baby all the time Idon't got this.
You got a two-parent householdover there.
Even though it's not me, youhave a mom and a dad dynamic
over there, Because Sierra doeshave her own two kids that are
10 and 11.
So she's been a mom for a longtime.

Speaker 2 (37:50):
And y'all got this.

Speaker 3 (37:51):
I don't feel guilty.
If y'all need to keep your kidsfor an extra week, I'm not
going to feel no type of way,because it's two of y'all over
there and y'all both ain't gotno job so she does, so she does
have kids as well.
You said yeah, she has kids,just not his kids.

Speaker 1 (38:09):
Okay, got you right.
So it's like a blended family.
So does your kids like they're?
How old are they, your kids?

Speaker 3 (38:17):
my kids yeah, that go over.
There are five or four, becauseI don't send the baby over
there, so he gets the five and afour year old um, and her kids
are like 10 and 11 or nine andten, something like that but so
your kids are old enough to tellyou like the dynamic they like
to go over there, telling, yeah,they do they like, they do like

(38:38):
to go over there.
Um, they do like her kids.
If they play with her kids,they're a little bit older so,
like her son was teaching my sonhow to play call of duty and
robo blocks.
And Zaya is a daddy's girl atheart.
She loves her dad.
Her dad can't do no wrong inher eyes.
That is daddy's baby.
So they do love to go overthere and they do love to be
around their dad and, aside fromlike what me and their dad are

(38:59):
going through on a personallevel, we keep the kids out of
it.
Like the kids know mommy'shouse and daddy's house and they
know both of them are safeplaces that they can be at
that's good, that's superimportant.

Speaker 1 (39:10):
Um, because you know, sometimes you can't trust
people, especially when they gotenvy and jealousy and and and
against you and you leaving yourkids.
You know what I'm saying.
They, they start to act weirdto the kids.
So that's good that the kidscan go over there and feel safe.

Speaker 3 (39:27):
Sierra has been around the kids jay sean was one
and josiah was six months oldbut she's been around them for
for a long time now.
She's built her ownrelationship with my kids.
So even like sierra has told me, oh, even if me and your baby
daddy not together, I still wantto be able to see your kids and
I don't have no problem withthat.
I'm not one of those bitterbaby mamas like oh you, my baby
daddy, girlfriend, I don't wantyou with my kids.
No, I've never been like that.

(39:48):
My kids are old enough to saythey call her mama cc and a lot
of people like you let them callher mama cc.

Speaker 1 (39:53):
They know that's not their mom right they know that
right, it's a name right no, forsure yeah, eva's a lot like
that too and I've never had beenin that position.
But Eva's like that as well.
Like you know, her daughter'sdad have another daughter that
she gets and she comes over andshe's just like at home.
And I'll be telling my cousin,like oh, I love that for you.

(40:16):
Like you know, even her sister,like she can have her sister
come over and her mom can dropher off and the dad don't even
got to be involved in the plansand you know, baby girl is safe
and she felt comfortable.
I feel like that's important.
Like you say, it takes avillage and, at the end of the
day, if you do love my children,if you did create that bond,
there's no reason for that tohave to interfere.

(40:38):
If the relationship does goSouth with you and their father
like you know what I'm saying we, we're all in this together.
If we, with you and theirfather, like you know what I'm
saying we, we're all in thistogether.

Speaker 3 (40:49):
if we, if you really love the kids, then it shouldn't
be a problem like, yeah, andthat's how I am, but not with my
baby jackaloo yeah I ain'tplaying the radio with that one
and it is really, it's really,it's really just my own decision
.
If jackaloo was to go over there, I think he would be fine, I
think he would be in good care.
Um, however, just because mybaby daddy already said f that
baby and sierra has already madeone or two comments herself,

(41:11):
that just don't sit right withme, um, I just don't send my
newborn baby over there and hecan only see the newborn baby,
like if the baby's at his mom'shouse or if he comes over to my
house or something like that sohow old is the newborn baby?

Speaker 1 (41:23):
now two months.
Jackaroo is two months old nowokay, and that name is so cute.
So where did the name jackaroocome from?
Did that?
Was that inspired by anythinglike?
That's a unique name.

Speaker 3 (41:33):
I don't think I've ever heard of anybody so
jackaroo, his name is actuallyjakeem matthew um.
Jakeem is his dad's name, so hewas named after his dad.
Everybody knows the traumaticexperience that I went through.
My baby daddy came to thehospital for the delivery but he
left at like four o'clock inthe morning five o'clock in the
morning because sierra wassitting downstairs waiting in
the car.

(41:53):
Yeah, why is she always in thecar?
She liked to be in the car.
So the next day he came back.
He signed the birth certificate.
Once again Sierra was waitingin the car.
But when I got home and my kidsasked me, they were like Mommy,

(42:13):
what's our brother's name?
I just brought tears to my eyes.
I couldn't say his name, Icouldn't say Jakeem.
It felt like a raw, open cutand so I just started silently
crying and I was just looking atmy kids and they just said it's
okay, mommy, we're just gonnacall him jack jack, and I was
like okay, so we're just gonnacall him jack jack and so that's
where the name came from.
We started calling him jack jackand then I just jackaroo came

(42:36):
from jack jack and I startedcalling him jackaroo.
Now everybody that's around himon a daily basis pretty much
calls him jackaroo and everybodyelse calls him jack jack.

Speaker 2 (42:46):
But he is named after his dad and that's how he got
the name jackaroo isn't thatamazing how your kids, like you
know, when you breaking down,like, oh, my kids come and scoop
me up so much, like they,asking about the name and
everything, and you can barelyeven get the words out and
you're going through yourfeelings and here they go,
smiling and oh, we'll call himthis, you know just I just love
that about my kids too, likethey can they absolutely can.

Speaker 1 (43:08):
They can sense it.
For sure, they definitely cansense it and I think that you
know that's important for us tokeep in mind too when we're
going through things.
I I know that that is one ofthe main things that keep me in
line when I'm dealing with theother half, like what my kids
that or whatever, because I knowmy kids can sense it and
they'll try to like indirectlymention it or like say something

(43:30):
, but they're very intertwinedlike with me emotionally so
right yeah that's so cute.

Speaker 3 (43:38):
I like that name, though Jackaroo so cute he's so
cute, they done took that nameup through that any video I've
ever seen, she's always justcalling him jackaroo.

Speaker 1 (43:50):
I've never heard the backstory of his name.

Speaker 3 (43:52):
Okay, yeah, but I think it's so cute I've been
meaning to make a post about itand how he got the nickname
jackaroo, but I just haven't butyeah, that's how you got it and
.
I kind of like the fact thateverybody is, like they're, so
bothered about what I'm callingmy child.

Speaker 1 (44:10):
What they be saying.

Speaker 3 (44:13):
Oh, that's his name.
You put that name on a birthcertificate.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
How could?

Speaker 3 (44:17):
you name your baby.
That that's not cute.
Wait no A lot of people thinkthat that's his real name.
Like a lot of people thinkthat's his real name, I'm pretty
sure like 80% of the internetthinks Jackie is his real name.

Speaker 1 (44:28):
Yeah, so even said I'm crazy for thinking that was
his real name because she knewoff rip that it was a nickname.
But, like I said, I never, Idon't.
I didn't know your baby dad'sname either, so I just was like,
oh, maybe that is his name.
You know, like I his name youknow like I, people give their

(44:49):
kids different names.

Speaker 2 (44:49):
All the time my I have two cousins that just named
their baby seven, seven reallyactually like that.

Speaker 1 (44:52):
Yes, I have a little girl cousin named seven and a
little boy cousin named seven.

Speaker 3 (44:56):
They're both like under three months I made a
video and I have put on it j a k, apostrophe r o o or ja,
apostrophe r-o-o.
And then when I did that, oh,they're like, yeah, that's his
name, that's what she named him,she spelled it so cute and I'm
like, okay, yeah that is so cute.

Speaker 1 (45:17):
So like with with the dynamic.
Now, like you said, right nowyou guys are kind of like on
calm terms.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
It's like you, you've drawn the line and like, since
you, perfectly, since youbrought that up you draw the
line and your terms.
Now I was wondering do you like, officially like, forgive your
baby dad for?

Speaker 1 (45:38):
no, okay hell.

Speaker 3 (45:41):
no.
The way that that man treatedme while I was pregnant, after I
was pregnant, it is nothing,nothing but glory to God that I
did not fall into a deeppostpartum depression and I feel
like he had no regard to that,not a care in the world on the
state of mind that I was and Iam the backbone for my kids, and

(46:02):
he knows that.
And I also feel like a lot ofthe times when I was going
through things, I feel like hewas trying to tear me down, like
he wanted, for I put my babydaddy through a lot of things.
That's another story to tellour relationship before sierra,
the things that I did to him,and I feel like he never forgave
me for that and he spent theblock solely to make me feel
that pain, to put me throughthat hurt that I put him through

(46:24):
wow and I can say you know,mission accomplished, because,
baby, I'm not going back.
We done, you know, did me, Idone.
Did you like?
Let's just raise these kids atthis point and I was just going
to ask.

Speaker 1 (46:37):
So that's so crazy.
You said that because I waswondering did you think the way
that he treated you was out ofresentment?
Not, I didn't even know abouty'all's history, but I was gonna
say out of resentment, like doyou think he thought you got
pregnant on purpose or do youthink he thought you were trying
to like cause more drama orlike break him up with his um?

Speaker 3 (46:55):
girlfriend.
Oh no, baby, here's the catch.
Here's the real team.
Jackaroo was playing I knew it.

Speaker 2 (47:00):
Oh, I knew it.
That's how it be, that's howthey be.

Speaker 3 (47:03):
That's how they be.
Jackaroo was planned.
I went and took my birthcontrol out.
We started the Monday visits toconceive Jackaroo.
Baby Jackaroo was planned.
Wow, that's even more just likethat you got me.

Speaker 1 (47:19):
You planned this baby with me on purpose, just to get
back at me.
Oh, he's one of them.
I'm scared, jackaroo, was'mscared.

Speaker 3 (47:26):
we had a we had a three, a three-step plan.
I'll tell y'all I never putthis on social media before.
We had a three-step plan one,we was gonna get matching
tattoos.
Two, we was gonna have a baby.
And three, we was gonna getmarried.
The only step that we did notdo was we did not get married,
and thank god.
I was second guessing because Ididn't want to share my income
tax because all we were doing wetook the pre-wedding class.

(47:48):
In all, we were scheduled tomeet at the courthouse on april
20th and we just did not do it.
Like it just fell through onour own personal things, not
because of sierra, not becauseof anything like we just didn't
do it and I never picked it backup from there because I didn't
want the legal bondage that camewith being married and I was
like you know what, brianna, howfar are you going to go to
prove the point to this girl?
And I had to draw the linethere.

(48:09):
But yeah, jackaroo was verymuch planned.
He went with me, I got my birthcontrol taken out and then we
started the Monday visits.
And what was not planned isSierra got into a car accident.
Sierra got into a really badcar accident.
She ended up being in thehospital in a coma for like a
month and a half and baby girlran into a huge lawsuit.

(48:29):
That is what was not plannedand, matter of fact, they got
into the car accident when shewas on her way to bring my baby
daddy to me so we could sneak inthe house and go have sex.
And after that car accident andshe was in a coma and even when
she was in a coma, my babydaddy was at my house while she
was in a coma and she was in acoma and even when she was in a
coma, my baby daddy was at myhouse while she was in a coma.
But after that and she foundout she was getting that whole

(48:49):
lawsuit, that's when thingschanged.

Speaker 1 (48:50):
For me and my baby daddy but jackaroo is already
conceived so she was getting alawsuit in her favor, like she
was getting money oh yeah, um.

Speaker 2 (48:59):
So then he had to play the role to make it seem
like jack jack jack wasn'tplanned and this isn't that, and
I really want to be with youand yeah, so that he can get
that money, get parts of coursewow

Speaker 3 (49:13):
and so everybody, the crazy thing like this I, I,
this, I can't make this up.
Like everybody knows this.
Everybody from the outsidelooking in sierra's probably the
only delusional one that thinksmy baby daddy's generally in
love with her.
But, baby, it's.
It's that money that you'redoing, it's the things that
you're doing for him that Iwould not do.
I don't enable my baby daddy todo what she's enabling him to
do.
I'm going to make you get up,get a job, get a business.

(49:35):
We're going to be successful,but not the way that you're
trying to do it.
Right, if you.
That's what was not planned.
The car accident and thelawsuit Jackaroo was planned.

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Wow, so we got that.
She's 25 and you're 28.
So how old is baby daddy?

Speaker 3 (50:01):
30.
My baby daddy is I'm 28.
I'm about to be 29.
33.
Turning 33 in July.

Speaker 1 (50:08):
Wow, I assumed he was older than that.
Yeah, wow, wow.
So that's crazy.

Speaker 2 (50:19):
I'm really trying to figure stuff out too.
But it ain't okay to just dragpeople down with you like it
ain't okay to and I don't knowplay these games correct.

Speaker 1 (50:25):
Play with other people's lives yes because,
though you may be doing it, youknow doing this to her are you
trying to promise me this, butthat makes me look at you a
certain way, because, like whycan't you just be an honest man,
like nobody deserves to youknow, go doing this to her.
Or you trying to promise methis, but that makes me look at
you a certain way, cause, likewhy can't you just be an honest
man, like nobody deserves to youknow, go be taken through that,
regardless of the situation,like she clearly really wants to
be with you for whatever reasonwe don't know her backstory but

(50:45):
for you to be, like you know,sitting here playing this role
and then this beautiful babystory.

Speaker 3 (50:52):
I would love this girl.
I would love for her to comeout and say her side of the
story, because it really don'tmake sense to me.
I mean, my baby daddy has to betreating this girl like an
angel or something like yeah, Idon't know, because a man paying
my bills is just not enough,like there's only so much I'm
gonna take and that's just me nofor sure I wouldn't deal with
none of this.

Speaker 1 (51:11):
I mean when the.
Moment you pulled up to myhouse thinking he was about to
pack anything out of my house,we would have all been in jail
or somewhere, somewhere, notindeed twice.

Speaker 3 (51:22):
Oh, twice, twice, twice, twice.
And I still pull up to herhouse anytime I want to and my
baby daddy gonna come outsideand that's our period.
But that's she comfortablebeing in that situation.
She's comfortable like she's isgiving.
Pick me like you want to bechosen, and he's gonna choose

(51:42):
you because it's cheaper to keepyou.

Speaker 1 (51:44):
He can't do that stuff over here and the thing
about it is is there's so manymore dogs in the world like you
ain't gotta deal with this one.
Like there might be another oneout there that might do you
some type of wrong.
But like baby, this is just toomuch wrong.
It ain't got to deal with thisone.
Like there might be another oneout there that might do you
some type of wrong, but likebaby, this is just too much
there's too much wrong.

Speaker 2 (51:59):
It ain't that much love in the world and in the
words of Tamar, what's theBraxton?

Speaker 1 (52:04):
What they say.
He must have a ding-a-ling-a-go.

Speaker 3 (52:06):
Because, baby, what Like must he must.
Because I don't know what, Idon't even know, I can't even
tell you the way that she movinglike she got.
She got like I said.
She got my baby daddy name fourtimes and I know this because
because my mother-in-law said webe gossiping.
We be gossiping, but mymother-in-law told me she want
my baby daddy to get get hername.

(52:28):
He's not doing it.
She asked my baby daddy tomarry her.
Since I got, when I gotpregnant again, she wanted my
baby daddy to marry her so thatshe could feel like she has some
type of commitment.
My baby daddy not doing it likeit's.
It's the science is there thatmy baby daddy, whether he's with
me or not, he don't plan onbeing with her for the long call
right, that's crazy and, likeyou said, if he sees your your

(52:49):
post.

Speaker 1 (52:50):
She sees your post probably oh yeah, she sees him.

Speaker 3 (52:52):
She sees him because I'll be sending this to her girl
.
She don't?

Speaker 2 (52:54):
believe anything he's saying like he oh she just yeah
, and that's the thing, oh shejust mad.

Speaker 1 (52:59):
But some of the stuff that you it can't be lies,
because some of the stuff likeshe said him being over there
and like all of that, like thatthere's like it's not that she
don't believe it y'all, becauseI don't send her pictures.

Speaker 3 (53:11):
I don't send her pictures of her key chain on my
dresser.
I done sent her pictures.
I sent her a video, a sex video, of me and my baby daddy, my
baby daddy, eating my police.
I sent the video to her.
You can't lie, you can't makethat up Like.
I sent you footage, sis.
So at the end of the day I haveto feel like you in it for the
long haul.

Speaker 1 (53:39):
Like you, just a part of the team at this point and
I've accepted her.
That's why I just call hersister wife and she just over to
taking care of my baby daddyright now, and you know that's
what it is.

Speaker 2 (53:44):
Wow, that's crazy.
That is crazy.
See, what's crazy is thinkingabout all of the ways, all of
the different things that he hasto say, to like, fix stuff with
sierra.
Like, think of the outrageous,like, okay, boom.
How does he explain a video inthe coochie?

Speaker 3 (53:57):
he told her.
He told her that it wasn't mybooty.

Speaker 2 (54:00):
He told her he wasn't eating my booty.

Speaker 3 (54:04):
He was eating it from the back and I say, first of
all, baby, all you have to do iszoom in and you can clearly see
what he's eating.
But second of all, does itmatter either way what?
What was being eaten?

Speaker 1 (54:14):
right, something was being eaten it wasn't
chick-fil-a, it wasn't, itwasn't, it wasn't right.

Speaker 3 (54:22):
The game like, like she's literally on my phone
saying but he said it wasn'tyour booty.
You even saying that like girl,it's crazy oh my gosh, yes, oh
my gosh.

Speaker 1 (54:38):
We gotta pray for her , we have to we have to pray for
her because, baby it, there'snothing she needs to be
delivered.

Speaker 2 (54:44):
No, for real.

Speaker 3 (54:45):
Yes, she needs to get away from that man, wow and
she'll text my phone somethingalong the lines of oh, he just
want to be with you because it'squick and it's easy, okay,
honey.
Well, what are you gonna?
Baby number five just want tobe with you because it's quick
and it's easy, okay, honey.
Well, what are you gonna?
Baby number five?
You want to see baby numberfive right like what our baby
number four?

Speaker 1 (55:03):
I'm sorry I'm skipping the whole job whether
it's quick and easy or hot andready, I don't want no man who
is going for that, like I don'tcare, like yep, and that's like.

Speaker 3 (55:18):
What I had to realize is, like I said, I can't be mad
at her and I can't blame her asmuch as I want to, because my
baby daddy is telling hersomething, just like he told me
something.
He's telling her something, soI just have to let her.
I got my baby daddy for 11years.
It took me 11 years to walkaway and, mind you, when I met
him, he had a girlfriend.
I took him from somebody else.
You get him, you lose him.
How you get him.
So, just how you came over hereand you took my baby daddy for

(55:39):
me, whether it be two years,three years, ten years from now,
baby, karma comes around and itis what it is.

Speaker 1 (55:48):
We need to end this on a more um because this is
spicy I am like I did not evenknow, and that's why I say like
it's so much more to the storyand people don't understand and
they're just like you know, andI can see why they're like, so,
like indulged in, and they wantto hear more and all they want
to you know comment and you know.

(56:10):
But at the end of the day, likeyou said, it's just always more
to the story.
So, while everybody was makingit like, oh, you're so
delusional, he's with this girl,he's in love with this girl,
like you said, he's telling youthings.
He's showing up, coming to yourhouse, y'all linking up, y'all
making plans.
He's telling you, okay, once,we, we going to do this, we
going to do that, and it's likeyou know what I'm saying.

(56:31):
He told me.

Speaker 3 (56:32):
He told me and I wonder if my baby daddy is going
to hear this podcast but hetold me for me not to block my
blessings.
I don't need to block myblessings.
I don't need to beef withSierra because she's going to
come across some money.
I don't need to block myblessings by beefing with her.
I said boy.

Speaker 1 (56:49):
What he's going to have to answer the guy.

Speaker 2 (56:51):
You're talking about blessings.

Speaker 1 (56:53):
You have to answer because the way you out here
doing these women and you got adaughter you got a beautiful
daughter that's going to grow upone day.
It's like what are you doing?

Speaker 2 (57:05):
Whatever she got.

Speaker 1 (57:06):
Whatever's for me is for me.
I'm not blocking nothing.
I can't block my blessings thatthe Lord got for me.
What I got for me is for me.
I don't need you or her.

Speaker 3 (57:16):
That's what he say when I try to cut him off.

Speaker 1 (57:17):
I'm blocking my blessing.
Oh, that's his way of trying tokeep Okay, don't block me,
because that money coming, baby,y'all going to be waiting for
that money for a long time.

Speaker 3 (57:25):
That money be coming, but it take a long time.
What God has showed me aboutmoney?
This is what God has showed meabout money.
God will provide for youWhatever you need.
God will provide.
If he provides for the birdsand the bees, why not you and me
?
Amen, ain't all money is notgood money, and I have had $5.
I've had $5 and I made itstretch.

(57:45):
My kids ate, my bills paid andthings like that, and I've had
$10,000 drop in my hand and I'mfacing an eviction and I can't
get shit together.
If you don't know how to manageyour money, it don't matter how
much money you have correctdon't.
So I don't care about y'allgetting a lawsuit.
I know that twiddle dee andtwiddle dum, y'all still don't
know what to do with the money.
Y'all still gonna be sittingover there struggling and

(58:08):
there's nothing.

Speaker 1 (58:09):
If you're gonna do this gonna make me want to be a
part of that situation, rightand the more you keep doing and
treating people the way you'retreating people, it doesn't
matter, like you say, how muchmoney you got, you're not going
to be blessed.
You're going to be blockingyour blessings because you're
not doing right.
You're not doing as a manshould do, as a father should do
.
You're not leading by anexample.
Yeah, you got you in situationsfor what you can get out of it,

(58:30):
and that's not good.
You're not.
That's not the type of lifethat you should be leading as a
33 year old man with three kids.
That's just not it.
And, like you say, you're goingto be blessed regardless.
So it's like I'm not about tosit around and be disrespected,
be humiliated, keep having kidswith you that I gotta raise, you
know, in my household by myself, even though you're here and

(58:51):
you're physically helping.
But I still have to do majority.
I'm not about to keep doingthat.
Giving you a key is a blessingin itself yeah, he's one, a
little girl.

Speaker 3 (59:00):
You still want to learn for us at all, right, oh
I'm.
I only want one baby mama.
Well, I guess you ain't have nogood girl.
Damn baby period.
No, I'm done having kids.
That's one of the main reasonwhy I did.
I don't want any more kids.
I don't even want to have achance of having a kid.
Yeah, I'm like, are you?

Speaker 2 (59:21):
contemplating, like getting your tooth tied because
I think about it nope, because I, literally I only date women.

Speaker 3 (59:28):
Okay, got you.
Yeah, so I don't have to worryabout getting my teeth, so I
don't have to worry about beingon birth control, because I'm
done with the male species.

Speaker 1 (59:38):
I know that's right.
So, like, after going throughall of that, and like moving
forward in your journey, likewhat are some things that you
see yourself doing?
Moving forward, like, now thatyou've grown, you a platform and
you do have an influence, um,and you, you have a good head on
your shoulders.
You know what I'm saying.
You're being led by christ,like what are your, what are

(59:59):
your future goals?

Speaker 3 (01:00:02):
so right now I'm working on a lot of stuff.
Um, I feel like everything thatI do I pray over because god
gave me this platform.
I've been doing social mediafor years and I've never taken
off.
I've taken off being with godon my side and, um, one of the
things that I do on my platform,I do the donation fridays.
I raise money for people whodon't have a platform and I send
the money back to.

(01:00:22):
I send that money to them.
That's one thing I do with myplatform.
Another thing that I'm gettinginto is, um, planning a brunch
lunch.
Lunch that's going to benetworking with women who have
their own businesses, othercontent creators.
Just putting all of those womenin the same room and letting
god work is magic, becausesometimes we just got to meet
people, y'all just got to getout there.
We just got to meet people, wejust got to take a chance, and

(01:00:44):
that's what I want to continueto do with my platform.
I want to continue to bring godto people who normally wouldn't
see god because you over herelooking at me being my baby
daddy side, where you don'tcatch the whole word so I want
to continue to um, bring God topeople who normally wouldn't see
God.
I want to continue to use myplatform in whatever way God has
to use my platform, whether itbe to get people stories out
there, whether it be to helpsomebody build their business,

(01:01:07):
whether it be for me.
I am my own brand and I workedhard for that and I just want to
continue to build that.

Speaker 1 (01:01:13):
Absolutely, and I love that for you and I think
that, as long as you continue tojust be your authentic self and
as transparent as you've been,regardless good, bad and
indifferent, you know thosethings will definitely come to
fruition.
You know, there's so manythings that you know people can
poke at and judge you for, butthere's also things that are,

(01:01:34):
you know, people can poke at andjudge you for, but there's also
things that are, you know,admirable and inspirational
about your story and just yourjourney and like who you're
becoming, um, as a woman inChrist, and things like that as
a mother.
So, um, I love that for you andwe definitely will continue to
support you and follow yourjourney, um, and we want to, we
want to.

(01:01:54):
You know, we're going to prayfor you, we want to see you do
all of those things because, atthe end of the day, um, it's
just going to be, like I said,uh, an amazing testimony and a
miracle that everybody gets towitness that, no matter what
you've been through the choicesthat you've made.
God can really still make atable for you in front of your
enemies and in front of all thepeople that want to see you lose

(01:02:15):
.

Speaker 2 (01:02:16):
Oh, yes, and you just going to sit there and be eaten
comfortably, and you know what?

Speaker 1 (01:02:20):
I'm saying, and that's, you know, a powerful
thing in itself.

Speaker 3 (01:02:25):
Yeah, I want to eventually get to the point
where I'm doing like speakingthings, where I can go places
and give my testimony.
I'm heavily involved in mychurch, so I actually go out to
prisons and jails and I share mytestimony there.
Um, we call that journey in thejail, so I've been doing that
and like that.
That's really what I'm aboutand I I'm trying to find a way
to introduce more of that totiktok.

(01:02:46):
Um, but yeah, I just for now.
They only want to see me shitabout my baby daddy, so I just
give them what they want.

Speaker 1 (01:02:55):
I love that and we thank you so much for even just
opening up to us and sharing andbeing, you know, taking the
time out to speak with us today,like, we absolutely appreciate
that, we understand that.
You know you might have a lotgoing on and you, you know
you're a mom, you you got yourbrand and everything that you're
doing, so we appreciate anybodywho takes the time out to sit

(01:03:15):
and chat with us, um, and we weappreciate you giving us the
opportunity to get to know yououtside of that, you know.

Speaker 3 (01:03:23):
Yes, thank you so much thank you guys for the
opportunity absolutely so.

Speaker 1 (01:03:29):
Until next time guys stay bold.