May 1, 2024 • 37 mins
You may know Emelia Hartford from last year’s film, Gran Turismo, or from her YouTube channel, where she builds and customizes cars for over 1 million subscribers. However, the successful career in cars, social media, and acting didn’t happen overnight. In this incredibly candid episode of She Pivots, Emelia recounts how her father’s suicide–and subsequently finding cars as an outlet for healing–has shaped her life. She opens up about the freedom she found in her driver’s license, the challenges she faced in making it to the big screen, and her advocacy for mental health.
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She Pivots was created by host Emily Tisch Sussman to highlight women, their stories, and how their pivot became their success. To learn more about Emelia, follow us on Instagram @ShePivotsThePodcast or visit shepivotsthepodcast.com.
Trigger warning: There are references to suicide that may be sensitive to some. Please listen with care.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
This episode contains references to suicide and other sensitive topics.
Please listen with care and take care. If you or
someone you know is struggling, call eight hundred two seven
three eight two fifty five the National Suicide Hotline, or
call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration Hotline
at one eight hundred sixty six ' two help. That's
(00:22):
one eight hundred sixty six to two help.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Welcome to She Pivots. I'm Amelia Hartford.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Welcome to She Pivots, the podcast where we talk with
women who dared to pivot out of one career and
into something new and explore how their personal lives impacted
these decisions. I'm your host, Emily Tish Sussman. Today I'm
joined by Amelia Hartford, actress best known for her role
(01:01):
in Grand Turismo, YouTuber and record breaking car builder and
driver Impressive. We're releasing Amelia's episode today in honor of
Mental Health Awareness Month because, in addition to her impressive career,
Amelia is a dedicated advocate for mental health. She sits
on the board of Alive and Well and has been
(01:22):
outspoken about her own experiences and struggles from the time
she was young Amelia always knew she wanted to be
an actress, and although her childhood was far from perfect,
life took a turn when she tragically lost her father
at just fifteen. Her life changed in a day and
she was forced to grow up quickly. That's when cars
came into her life and it became her path to healing.
(01:45):
At the time, she had no idea that one day
she would make it a career and bring her back
to her longtime dream of acting. What I love about
Amelia's story is that her pivot was born out of
healing and brought her to places and of opportunities she
couldn't even imagine. With one point five million YouTube subscribers,
a blockbuster movie, and multiple world records under her belt,
(02:09):
Amelia has remained grounded throughout it all. I hope you
enjoyed this episode as much as I did.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
My name is Amelia Hartford. I am an actress, an entrepreneur.
I build a drive race cars, and I'm also on
the board of a nonprofit organization called Alive and Well, so.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
We're going to go back. We're going to go back
to your childhood. Where were you born? I was born.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I actually just found out that I was born in Upland, California.
I lived in Westlake Village when I was younger, and
I found out I was born in Upland because that's
in San Bernardino, and my IMDb page says I was
born in San Bordadino, and I was like, oh, that's
not that's not right. I wasn't born in San Berdandino.
And we reached out to IMDb and they're like, well, no,
(02:56):
we actually pulled your records and you are, in fact,
like born in was like, whoa, that's news. But I
was born in Upland, California, And yeah, I grew up
in Westlake Village area, which for those who don't know
where that is, it's about an hour northwest ish of
(03:19):
Los Angeles. So I lived close enough to be near LA,
but far enough to where, you know, as a kid,
we never really made the drive to Los Angeles. My
dad was an aspiring producer and writer, so I always
knew him as writing scripts, trying to produce and make
stuff happen. But I also never felt like we were
(03:40):
in the business because all I saw was the work
he did at home. There was maybe one or two
times as a kid, I want to set to kind
of see that whole experience because I always wanted to act,
so my dad thought it'd be cool to bring me
to set a couple times and get to I think
his intention was to talk me out of it to
be a lawyer.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
So you always wanted to be an actors? What turns
it on for you?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I always wanted to be an actress, and more so
because you don't remember, at least I don't remember a
lot when I was younger. So my mom's actually the
one who would always tell me, like, ever since you
could talk, it's the only thing you ever wanted to do.
And I know it sounds silly, and I feel like
you hear a lot of people say this, but as
a kid, you just love playing pretend. And then I
(04:22):
think I just never really grew out of the love
of wanting to explore these other I guess ways of
life and these characters, and it's just something that, like,
I really love to do. And when I was younger,
I didn't fully understand it to the way I do today,
(04:43):
but it was just fun. There was a career where
I got to continue to play, and that's what I
wanted to do.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Despite growing up in an idyllic community. Amelia's childhood was
far from perfect. Her upbringing was riddled with conflict and
pain that would influence her for years to come.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
So I make it sound like my upbringing was really sweet,
from Westlake Village, a suburban community, and my dad taking
me to sets and all that. But I don't know
if I've talked too much about it. I feel like
as I'm getting older, I'm getting a little more vocal
with it. My dad had addiction issues growing up, and
(05:27):
he unfortunately also suffered a lot of mental health issues,
and in return, I hate he was abusive and it
was both physical and mental. But it was definitely a
hard upbringing. And my mom was a stay at home mom,
(05:49):
and it got worse as we got older.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
As things got worse at home, they moved Amelia from
school to school as she struggled to cope with it all.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Because things at home had gotten so bad that I
wasn't trying in school. So I think I was just
going through such a hard time that I just stopped
caring in school because I was like, what's the point
I want to act? No one can tell me why
I need to know math. I don't care. I just
need to get through this point where I can either
emancipate myself or move out.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Then, when Amelia was a junior, the unimaginable happened.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
But it was at that third year in high school
and my dad actually took his own life. He shot
himself in the head. And I was the only one
home with him that week when it had happened. And
that was definitely a huge shake up in my life
because although there was a abuse to the family, substance
(06:42):
abuse to himself, he was still my dad and I
still looked up to him. Even though it's kind of
crazy to be like, oh, you looked up to that,
But at the end of the day, he was my dad.
It's not always negative, like you can cry and laugh.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
At the same time, the loss of her father reverberated
throughout her life. Her mother was now alone with two
kids and little to no work experience, So her mom
made the decision to go back to school and move
Amelia and her siblings closer to her family in the Midwest,
something that wasn't easy for Amelia.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
We now have to uproot and move to Indiana because
she wants to be closer to a family who were
in Illinois. She couldn't afford the cost of living and
decided to go back to school. And I had to
grow up very quickly because there was no one who
was going to take care of me. I didn't have,
(07:36):
like I guess, I just always thought I had that
safety in my back pocket of there being my dad,
of like, oh, how do I save my money? How
do I buy my first car? Like the things that
I just, I guess, without really thinking, assumed I'd be
able to lean on him for And that's when I
had to grow up a little and realize that if
(07:59):
the thing's gonna if I'm gonna learn anything in this life,
ornything's gonna happen. I don't want to say I'm on
my own, because you know, I grew to have peers,
and obviously my mom was there, but it was I
wanted to take care of my mom. I wanted to
be the person who could kind of take care of
myself also, And that's kind of what shifted for me.
(08:19):
And I didn't understand at the time why she would
want to move. And I was kind of at this
rebellious age of just kind of being mad at the
world over everything. As I've grown older. My mom's my hero.
The fact that she went through that and handled the
(08:40):
way she did and is still here today after I
mean they were still married up until he took his life.
She might not have the nicest things to say about him,
but her going through that was the role model that
I had in my life, whether I realized it or not.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
At this point, a Million felt trapped, trapped by her family,
by the move by life, and she saw cars as
the way to freedom. Here's a clip of her talking
about it on the broad Ideas podcast with Rachel Bilson
and Olivia Allen.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
All Right, I need a car. I need that sense
of freedom and escape and I need to get out.
What car do I buy myself?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
But before moving to Indiana again, one of the big
decisions in my life is what car was going to
buy myself. I went on the internet. The Internet told
me I needed something real drive, a stick shift, and
bigger than a four cylinder. And I bought this Infinity
G thirty five for my first car. It was a
manual six cylinder where will drive fun little JDM twudor
(09:41):
and it was bright green. It was super flashy looking
and I loved it. And that's the car. I drove
from California to Indiana, and while I was out there,
I had one of my friends in the passenger seat
of my car and we're out of light in Bloomington, Indiana,
(10:02):
and this old Crownvic like they're what the old cop
cars were pulled up next to us at the light,
and my friend yells out the window, don't you love
my friend's car? And I was like, Jessica, you're being
so embarrassing right now. But his name's Deo, and Dao
was like, I do, Actually, you should consider coming to
(10:23):
one of our car meets, and I was like, oh,
that sounds fun. So he hands out the window like
a little time and an address of war to show
up to, and it happened to be like a couple
days later. My friend didn't come with me, And in hindsight,
I'm like, why is this sixteen year old girl showing
up to this parking garage in the middle of the
night in Indiana to go meet this random guy and whatever?
(10:45):
Like I don't in hindsight, I'm like, what the fuck? Sorry,
language was I thinking? But I ended up going and
I think I was just like I didn't have that
thought of like what if, and I don't think I've
ever really had that what's planned B or stuff like
that just went. But that's where I met B Crew
B for Bloomington and then Crew. And that's also where
(11:06):
I met Booch, who is still one of my closest
friends to this day. He became my first mentor. I'm
actually one of the groomsmen at his wedding this year.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
That's amazing.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
And the guys kind of became my found family and
they pulled me out of this really dark time and
you know, instead of partying on the weekends, which don't
get me wrong, there was a fair share of they
really helped pull me out of that and I began
upgrading turbos and swapping engines and just kind of working
(11:43):
on cars, which was everything I needed at that time.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Without realizing it, Amelia's love for cars became her lifeline
as she slowly healed from the loss of her father.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
It was fun, it was a great distraction, and they
kind of opened me up to a world where I
could take something, tear it apart, and make it better
or faster than what it was previously. And I had
always done that in my life, like when I had
an Xbox. When I was little, I would get the
Red Ring of Death and I would tear it apart,
(12:14):
and you're supposed to stack it with pennies, and I'd
put it all back together. And I just liked the
element of taking things apart, seeing how they worked and
doing that. So when I got introduced to that for cars,
it everything just clicked at that point. And it was
also great because I feel like I've had a found
family now wherever I travel, there's a car community somewhere everywhere.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Still, while her love for cars grew, her dream of
being an actress always played in the back of her mind.
When we come back, Amelia talks about revisiting her longtime
dream of being an actress. Now back to the show.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
I started getting this feeling of like my time years up,
like I'm ready to go back and chase this dream.
I actually couldn't turn on the television without feeling guilty
that I wasn't pursuing the one, like literally the one
thing I wanted to do in life. It's funny because
I like tried auditioning for the school play and I
(13:20):
didn't get in, and I was trying to actually apply
to like acting colleges like I tried applying to USC.
There was a Wellington, which was a school in New
Zealand that had a big focus on I was going
to try to I listen. I didn't have the money
to do it. I was just applying to see what
would happen and then figure it out from there. I also,
(13:44):
from going through everything I had went through, I felt
that I wasn't going to get what I needed from
a typical education because everything I went through I had,
I was like doing firsthand to learn. So something in
my gut was like, you need to just move back
(14:05):
to Los Angeles and just try to get work. And
I packed my little two door Japanese car I had
had another one at that point, whatever I could fit
in it, drove cross country and started this crazy adventure.
At that point, what.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Did you do when you showed up in LA? You're like,
all right, I'm in the city limits, Like where did
you go?
Speaker 2 (14:28):
So I felt like I didn't even know La because
I didn't spend time here as a kid. I got
this little apartment in North Hollywood, But like.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
How did you find the first apartment? Like where did
you literally go when you when you showed up Craigslist,
of course.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
I and I still use like I still like I
buy cars off Craigslist today, Like I did everything on Craigslist,
and all my furniture was there from there too. So
I had previously come out to like kind of apartment,
and then I went on Craigslist. I tried to find
not only as I tried to find the most affordable apartment,
(15:07):
I also had to go see to make sure that
my car could make it up the driveway because I
drove a really low car that had no air conditioning,
was extremely loud, and I, you know, I realized after
a couple of years of being here, going to auditions
where I had sweat all down the back of my shirt,
my makeup was runny, my hair was frizzy, I'm like, okay,
(15:29):
and I'd break down sometimes I'm like, all right, I
need a reliable car for transportation that has air conditioning.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
You're like, this might not be helping me.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah, yeah, I found. I ended up finding this place
that I then signed a lease. It was rent controlled,
which was super helpful for me at the time, and
I moved in.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
What kind of jobs did you work when you got.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
To La Everything was food and service so I worked
as I started as a bus and then I went
as a host, and then I started waiting tables, and
I did food and service for six years before starting YouTube.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
So you kept up with the cars the whole time.
Tell us a little bit about like did you keep
it up? Like what did the car piece look like
for you?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
So I was continue to work in my car. I
had to keep it running in order to get to work,
and I couldn't afford to take it to shops, and
the couple shops I hadn't taken it too, I felt
like I was always taking either overpaying or I'd get
my car back and there'd be a new issue that
wasn't there before, and the math wasn't mathing. So I
(16:40):
was like, in order to like, I just need to
keep doing it myself because I can at least trust that.
And it was also just fun. And so when I
wasn't working at a restaurant, I was at Samuel French
reading every play I could. I'd bought the agent and
manage your books, and I put together a little package
and cold mailed everyone. I thought it could be a
(17:03):
right fit to work together, and I was signing up
on casting director workshops, and I would print little headshot
cards and mail them the casting directors, and I did
everything I could on that front. And then when I
wasn't doing that, I was tinkering with my car.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
So the car tinkering ended up kind of being out
of necessity, but keep done some serious builds. Was that
during that period when it was when you were doing
the builds?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Yeah, I think it was more just tinkering out of
necessity and just upkeep and routine maintenance and necessary upgrades.
And I after six years of mind you, it took
me nine years of being in LA before I got
my first opportunity in acting, after six years of working
(17:52):
in a restaurant. It was actually my mom who was like, honey,
you're always working on your cars. Have you ever thought
about filming it and putting it on YouTube? And I
remember so clear as like YouTube, please, Mom, What do
you know about YouTube? Moms are always right though, And
(18:13):
around the same time there was Vice Media. They were
putting together to help launch Michelin tires new PS four
US tire, which it's funny at a lot of you
listening might actually have that tire on your car, and
(18:33):
they wanted more women representation at this event because the
space is very male dominated and I had no followers
on my Instagram, but I think I was doing I
had a subrou at one point because I thought, well,
this will be more reliable than my other car, which
they're not, and I was I posted a photo like
doing breaks or something on my Subaru and someone Advice
(19:00):
had seen this post on Instagram thought we should reach out.
And I remember I was one of the restaurants I
was working out where I was like, oh, Vice Media
just reached out to me. This was like right around
the same time my mom was pressing me to do YouTube.
They want me to come just meet them and Michelin
and be a part of this event for the new
(19:23):
tire and I was so proud. I went to my
boss and he was so stoked for me. He's like, yeah, absolutely.
I was like, I need to take three days off.
He's like, you can do this, go do it. And
I like went and I saw these guys screaming at
a camera and I was like, this is YouTube. If
they could do it, I can do it. And these
(19:44):
guys are have I still talk to them today. They
were hugely helpful to where my career is today, and
they were so supportive because they also wanted to help,
like they wanted to see other women in the space
as well, so they were like, this is the camera
you want to get, and you want to put this
little fuzzy thing on. It was a G seven X
(20:05):
for those who knows cameras, and they're like, you should
put this little fuzzy thing on the mic for wind noise,
and this is the editing software we recommend you use,
and blah blah blah. And they kind of gave me
the foundation for what I needed and they're like, if
you have any questions, like, we're happy to be here
to help guide you. Obviously they're not going to do
the work for me. Nobody is. But if I needed
a little bit of advice here or there, they were
(20:27):
there for me. And when I got back, I am
not exaggerating when I say the story. I spent every
single penny in my bank account to buy a G
seven X and I bought it off Craigslist and I
met this guy at a random gas station and if
(20:47):
I remember correctly, it didn't even come with a battery.
So then I had to go save money to go
buy a battery for this camera and then go get
like SD cards and my first video, which I was
intimidated to do, but I also did plenty of research
to see what performed, what did well on YouTube, what
space and category was I putting myself in with the
(21:09):
cars that I'd be making content with, and what kind
of objective or through line should there be. So my
first video was walking around my Nissan two forty SX,
which was the car that I drove from Indiana to California.
And my idea was, and what I had voiced to
(21:33):
my non existent audience at the time, was I'm this
is my car. And I just did ten minutes walking
around the car, showing it, talking about it all the
things that needed to get done. And I set a goal,
and my goal was I'm going to rebuild this car
because I'd been sitting for a long time and learn
how to drift in one month.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Hi guys, I'm Amelia miss Amelia on Instagram, and welcome
to my first blog. I've decided to start blogging the
build of my two forty that I've had for five
years now. Okay, guys, so as you can see those.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Car, it's a lot of work, but I'm excited for it.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I think it'll be fun.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
There's a lot to do, but yeah, bye bye.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And the first video did half a million views and
I wasn't expecting it. I uploaded the video I want
snowboarding in the mountains and I had no service, and
as I was coming down the mountain, I'm like looking
at him, like, oh my god, it's done. You know,
first it was ten thousand views, then it's done twenty,
that's done, one hundred, and I'm like, oh my god,
(22:50):
like this is like, this is crazy. And I was like, okay,
well I have to keep doing it, Like I can't
just not do it now. This this is it. So
ever since then, i'd been doing three videos a week
for the last seven years, really six years the last
year after booking Grand Turismo. I'm always going to continue
(23:13):
to do YouTube, but I've tailored it back to one
video a week so I can also have a good
light work life balance, because I want to do this forever.
And I see a lot of other creators get burnt
out because of how taxing this job can be on
your mental and your physical. So I'm like, let me
get ahead of it, let me tailor it down. So
(23:34):
I can have longevity because I don't, like, I have
such an incredible audience that I feel like they're my friends,
and I feel like I can't just not call my
friends anymore, you know.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
So I want to hear what your intention was when
you say that you were very intentional about like what
the through line was, what the content was, how it
was positioning, like how you thought it about it going
in as you started it, and then it did it evolve?
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah, So my initial through line was I'm going to
build this car and learn how to drift in one month.
It was a tangible goal that I could try to
achieve and it was something that the audience could understand.
What's the purpose. And it's funny because, like, again, I
had no money. I was on food stamps three different times,
and I put out this video and I'm just like,
I feel like I just lied to everyone, because how
(24:23):
the fuck am I going to afford parts? I can't
even change my oil without getting threatened to viction in
my parking garage. And through the first video, I had
one person reach out who became a friend, who then
reached connected me to another person who it kind of
snowballed into some person like people letting me borrow their
tools and some people selling me parts for cheap because
(24:46):
they could let them go. And it just like, I
love the car community because they were so willing to
help at a time just to wanting to see a
fellow audi enthusiastic person succeed with their goal. So everyone
was hugely supportive. And it was crazy because people say,
(25:06):
leap in the net will appear, and that was like
the first time that I really saw that happen. And
then slowly I started making money on the videos I
was posting, and don't get me wrong, they didn't all
do half a mil. That was just the first one.
Then when I started posting again, then they were doing
like twenty thousand, forty thousand, and then everything just kind
of evolved from there and grew larger than what I
(25:29):
could have ever imagined.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Then you became very accomplished in cars and as a
creator in YouTube, and then you came I'd say, back
to acting, because I guess, did you ever really leave it?
Liked was there ever a point where you're like, you
know what, this YouTube thing is really working out for me?
Or you were or you were always trying to get
back to.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Acting I've always wanted to do acting. I couldn't afford
to do acting class at a certain point because I
was just trying to pay my rent, and I just
I felt so guilty because I really am so I'm
such a believer and if you have a dream, go
after it, and I just felt so guilty that I
wasn't going after it. That I do think sometimes you
(26:10):
need to step aside to reassess, build, and plan in
order to go back to doing something. Otherwise it's like,
if you do what's that saying? The definition of insanity
is doing the same thing every day and expecting different results.
So being able to step aside and create this family
also business on YouTube, it gave me, and I say
(26:33):
financial freedom lightly, but it gave me the freedom to
afford food on my table, pay my rent, and afford
acting class. And I wasn't desperate to book a job.
I got to actually enjoy the process and make unique
choices in character work. And yeah, I also saw when
(26:56):
I was a big part of the decision of starting
to YouTube too, was when I was waiting tables. The
joke is, oh, you're an actor, what restaurant do you
work at? And I saw other servers that I worked
with lose acting jobs to people who had a following
on social media, and it was still such a new
(27:17):
thing at the time. So I felt like, well, if
I could do what I love, which is building cars,
and I can also build a following, maybe just maybe
that can help me. At the same time, what was
the first acting job that you got. So the first
acting job that I got was this And I say
(27:38):
I call them little that's because what everyone calls them,
the producer, the director, all of them. It was this
little Christmas movie. It was California Christmas City Lights. So
it was their sequel to California Christmas, which was the
first movie during COVID to finish production, and it went
(27:58):
on Netflix and number one in the world for like
eight weeks or something like that. So I ended up
getting a really sweet opportunity to be in the second one,
and I had a few lines in there. And then
that team kind of became a family in a way
as well, the ESX family, and they do these smaller
(28:21):
budget Christmas movies and they've helped me to get some
more on set experience. I had met the owner of
the production company Ali through a former manager of mine,
because Ali, he and I have similar stories. I know
he'd be okay with me sharing this. But I lost
(28:43):
my dad at fifteen. He lost his mom at fifteen,
and he ended up going to the automotive world in
the same trajectory that I did. And it's funny because
I had at one point held the record for the
world's fastest new generation corvette, but he did for super
and we didn't know one another, and he went from
(29:05):
racing for subru to producing movies about cars to then
doing these feel good Christmas movies. Allie's become like a
father to me. I'm very grateful that he was introduced
to me and is in my life. But from there
is how I got Grand Turismo. I had done like
a little Netflix thing back in the day called Fastest Car.
(29:27):
And it's funny because I actually like everyone's like, why
are you doing this? Like because I was losing money.
I didn't get paid for it. Everyone thinks, how I
must have made a lot of money. I was just like, oh, yeah,
I'll do it if I can do like this fun
race and maybe get a Netflix credit, which could be cool.
But I was more stoked about the fact that they
were going to give me x amount of money to
put a roll cage in my car because in order
(29:48):
to race, for them to get insurance, mic or had
to be safe and I couldn't afford it. So I
was like, well, they're going to pay for it and
I get to race, Like why not. I had really
enjoyed the show previously. They allow you just to like
share your story and hopefully inspire others, and then you
get to race a four wide drag race, which is
(30:09):
kind of how I got into drag racing. Because my
little Nissan two forty SX, I decided for this Fastest
Car show, I would convert my drift car into a
drag car, and that's what I did, and I loved it,
and then that's kind of how I became obsessed with
drag racing. But I did the show. They flew boots
(30:31):
out from Indiana, which is super sweet, and one of
the producers on Grand Turismo had seen that episode. He
was also a fan of the show started following me
on Instagram. I didn't know this, and when I was
posting about the carpet premier stuff for the ESX productions
I was a part of, he saw that, oh she's acting.
(30:53):
We actually have a role in this movie. We should
have her audition for casting. I guess loved me and
the rest of this history.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
What kind of impact did that have on your trajectory?
It's such a huge, huge thing.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yeah, it's so easy to feel hopeless at times, and
especially in this industry. Like a week before, I was like,
when they say it takes ten years to be an
overnight success, it took me ten years to like, I
felt like, really just start. But that job gave me
so much hope, and I don't I keep talking about
(31:28):
how I meet these incredible people along my life, and
it sounds cheesy, but I am grateful, and I think
that's something that I can always rely on myself to
be as grateful because I believe there is good in everyone,
and I do think people want to see others succeed,
and yeah, I've I think I've also been through enough
(31:49):
to see so much negativity that I'd rather just have
that outlook on life of being surrounded by great people.
Speaker 1 (31:57):
Amelia's positive outlook on life has not always come. She's
been open about her struggles with mental health, depression, and anxiety.
When we come back, Amelia talks about how she found
help amidst her struggles. Now back to the show. So
(32:18):
you've spoken openly about how you've struggled with mental health,
with depression and anxiety. How has that manifested itself for you?
Speaker 2 (32:26):
I feel like dealing with it is literally what I
did for so long. It took me a very, very,
very long time to find a therapist. So spent a
lot of time trying to find a good therapist. I'm
very big on working out. I think working out every
day or even just taking a thirty minute walk outside,
getting some sunlight's very important. Taking your multi vitamins as
(32:49):
you know, cheesy as that sounds, and getting good proper
sleep and all that, and surrounding yourself with good people
and all that. It's all easier said than done, but
super important to do. And also just proper education in
learning about you know, you take care of your physical health,
how do you take care of your mental health?
Speaker 1 (33:09):
I should continue to educate herself. Amelia has made it
a point to educate her audience alongside her becoming a
staunch mental health advocate.
Speaker 3 (33:18):
Just spread love, spread kindness, be kind Know that everyone
is fighting a battle that.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
You know nothing about. If you guys, don't have peers
or family that you can reach out to, or just
need someone to call. There is an emergency hotline that
you can talk to someone. It's really sad when people
believe or at that mental state where they feel suicide
(33:47):
is their only option. And I promise you that it
is not. There is a lot at the end of
the tunnel. Things will get better and there are people
here for you. And that's kind of how I found
Alive and Well because that's the non profit that I'm
on the board of, because their through line was we'd
rather put a fence around a cliff than an ambulance
(34:07):
or rehearsed at the bottom. And how they've done that
was really through education and starting with trying to educate
young adults with proper mental health care. And we in
Atlanta work with various schools and therapists to help educate
(34:31):
and also to help subsidize, So we're working on subsidizing
the cost of mental health care. I'd like to try
to find a way where we can eventually make it
cost free for people and so much more so. Yeah,
I found them trying to learn and educate myself and
(34:51):
that's been great.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Is there anything in particular where at the time you
felt like was really like a low point or a setback,
but now in retrospect you see it as having really
launched you to where you are now.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
Yeah, I mean quite frankly, my dad's death. I know
I wouldn't be where I am today. I know I
wouldn't be as grounded or as hard working. It sounds
so fucked up to say this, because I wish my
dad were still here today, but it was probably one
of the best things to happen to me and my family.
Keep in mind the abuse and the struggles that we
(35:29):
went through and what he was struggling with as well.
Is weird as it sounds. That changed my life for
the better and it has made me who I am today,
and I am weirdly grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Well, thank you so much for being on with us
and being such an open book.
Speaker 2 (35:46):
Oh thank you. I really do appreciate you having me on.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
Amelia is continuing to advocate for more mental health resources
and care, all while breaking world records as a car
builder and driver, not forget her career as an actress.
To stay up to date on everything Amelia is up
to follow her on Instagram at miss Amelia You can
also find a list of mental health resources on our website,
(36:12):
she Pivots the Podcast under our causes page. Thanks for
listening to this episode of she Pivots. If you've made
it this far, you're a true pivoter, so thanks for
being part of this community. I hope you enjoyed this episode,
and if you did leave us a rating, please be nice.
Tell your friends about us. To learn more about our guests,
(36:32):
follow us on Instagram at she pivots the Podcast, or
sign up for our newsletter where you can get exclusive
behind the scenes content, or on our website, she Pivots
the Podcast Talk to You next Week. Special thanks to
the she Pivots team, Executive producer Emily Edavlosk, Associate producer
and social media connoisseur Hannah Cousins, Research director Christine Dickinson,
(36:57):
Events and Logistics coordinator, Madeleine snow vic An, audio editor
and mixer Nina pollock I endorse Te Pivots
This episode contains references to suicide and other sensitive topics.
Please listen with care and take care. If you or
someone you know is struggling, call eight hundred two seven
three eight two fifty five the National Suicide Hotline, or
call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration Hotline
at one eight hundred sixty six ' two help. That's
(00:22):
one eight hundred sixty six to two help.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
Welcome to She Pivots. I'm Amelia Hartford.
Speaker 1 (00:38):
Welcome to She Pivots, the podcast where we talk with
women who dared to pivot out of one career and
into something new and explore how their personal lives impacted
these decisions. I'm your host, Emily Tish Sussman. Today I'm
joined by Amelia Hartford, actress best known for her role
(01:01):
in Grand Turismo, YouTuber and record breaking car builder and
driver Impressive. We're releasing Amelia's episode today in honor of
Mental Health Awareness Month because, in addition to her impressive career,
Amelia is a dedicated advocate for mental health. She sits
on the board of Alive and Well and has been
(01:22):
outspoken about her own experiences and struggles from the time
she was young Amelia always knew she wanted to be
an actress, and although her childhood was far from perfect,
life took a turn when she tragically lost her father
at just fifteen. Her life changed in a day and
she was forced to grow up quickly. That's when cars
came into her life and it became her path to healing.
(01:45):
At the time, she had no idea that one day
she would make it a career and bring her back
to her longtime dream of acting. What I love about
Amelia's story is that her pivot was born out of
healing and brought her to places and of opportunities she
couldn't even imagine. With one point five million YouTube subscribers,
a blockbuster movie, and multiple world records under her belt,
(02:09):
Amelia has remained grounded throughout it all. I hope you
enjoyed this episode as much as I did.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
My name is Amelia Hartford. I am an actress, an entrepreneur.
I build a drive race cars, and I'm also on
the board of a nonprofit organization called Alive and Well, so.
Speaker 1 (02:27):
We're going to go back. We're going to go back
to your childhood. Where were you born? I was born.
Speaker 2 (02:32):
I actually just found out that I was born in Upland, California.
I lived in Westlake Village when I was younger, and
I found out I was born in Upland because that's
in San Bernardino, and my IMDb page says I was
born in San Bordadino, and I was like, oh, that's
not that's not right. I wasn't born in San Berdandino.
And we reached out to IMDb and they're like, well, no,
(02:56):
we actually pulled your records and you are, in fact,
like born in was like, whoa, that's news. But I
was born in Upland, California, And yeah, I grew up
in Westlake Village area, which for those who don't know
where that is, it's about an hour northwest ish of
(03:19):
Los Angeles. So I lived close enough to be near LA,
but far enough to where, you know, as a kid,
we never really made the drive to Los Angeles. My
dad was an aspiring producer and writer, so I always
knew him as writing scripts, trying to produce and make
stuff happen. But I also never felt like we were
(03:40):
in the business because all I saw was the work
he did at home. There was maybe one or two
times as a kid, I want to set to kind
of see that whole experience because I always wanted to act,
so my dad thought it'd be cool to bring me
to set a couple times and get to I think
his intention was to talk me out of it to
be a lawyer.
Speaker 1 (03:58):
So you always wanted to be an actors? What turns
it on for you?
Speaker 2 (04:02):
I always wanted to be an actress, and more so
because you don't remember, at least I don't remember a
lot when I was younger. So my mom's actually the
one who would always tell me, like, ever since you
could talk, it's the only thing you ever wanted to do.
And I know it sounds silly, and I feel like
you hear a lot of people say this, but as
a kid, you just love playing pretend. And then I
(04:22):
think I just never really grew out of the love
of wanting to explore these other I guess ways of
life and these characters, and it's just something that, like,
I really love to do. And when I was younger,
I didn't fully understand it to the way I do today,
(04:43):
but it was just fun. There was a career where
I got to continue to play, and that's what I
wanted to do.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Despite growing up in an idyllic community. Amelia's childhood was
far from perfect. Her upbringing was riddled with conflict and
pain that would influence her for years to come.
Speaker 2 (05:02):
So I make it sound like my upbringing was really sweet,
from Westlake Village, a suburban community, and my dad taking
me to sets and all that. But I don't know
if I've talked too much about it. I feel like
as I'm getting older, I'm getting a little more vocal
with it. My dad had addiction issues growing up, and
(05:27):
he unfortunately also suffered a lot of mental health issues,
and in return, I hate he was abusive and it
was both physical and mental. But it was definitely a
hard upbringing. And my mom was a stay at home mom,
(05:49):
and it got worse as we got older.
Speaker 1 (05:53):
As things got worse at home, they moved Amelia from
school to school as she struggled to cope with it all.
Speaker 2 (06:00):
Because things at home had gotten so bad that I
wasn't trying in school. So I think I was just
going through such a hard time that I just stopped
caring in school because I was like, what's the point
I want to act? No one can tell me why
I need to know math. I don't care. I just
need to get through this point where I can either
emancipate myself or move out.
Speaker 1 (06:16):
Then, when Amelia was a junior, the unimaginable happened.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
But it was at that third year in high school
and my dad actually took his own life. He shot
himself in the head. And I was the only one
home with him that week when it had happened. And
that was definitely a huge shake up in my life
because although there was a abuse to the family, substance
(06:42):
abuse to himself, he was still my dad and I
still looked up to him. Even though it's kind of
crazy to be like, oh, you looked up to that,
But at the end of the day, he was my dad.
It's not always negative, like you can cry and laugh.
Speaker 1 (06:57):
At the same time, the loss of her father reverberated
throughout her life. Her mother was now alone with two
kids and little to no work experience, So her mom
made the decision to go back to school and move
Amelia and her siblings closer to her family in the Midwest,
something that wasn't easy for Amelia.
Speaker 2 (07:16):
We now have to uproot and move to Indiana because
she wants to be closer to a family who were
in Illinois. She couldn't afford the cost of living and
decided to go back to school. And I had to
grow up very quickly because there was no one who
was going to take care of me. I didn't have,
(07:36):
like I guess, I just always thought I had that
safety in my back pocket of there being my dad,
of like, oh, how do I save my money? How
do I buy my first car? Like the things that
I just, I guess, without really thinking, assumed I'd be
able to lean on him for And that's when I
had to grow up a little and realize that if
(07:59):
the thing's gonna if I'm gonna learn anything in this life,
ornything's gonna happen. I don't want to say I'm on
my own, because you know, I grew to have peers,
and obviously my mom was there, but it was I
wanted to take care of my mom. I wanted to
be the person who could kind of take care of
myself also, And that's kind of what shifted for me.
(08:19):
And I didn't understand at the time why she would
want to move. And I was kind of at this
rebellious age of just kind of being mad at the
world over everything. As I've grown older. My mom's my hero.
The fact that she went through that and handled the
(08:40):
way she did and is still here today after I
mean they were still married up until he took his life.
She might not have the nicest things to say about him,
but her going through that was the role model that
I had in my life, whether I realized it or not.
Speaker 1 (08:58):
At this point, a Million felt trapped, trapped by her family,
by the move by life, and she saw cars as
the way to freedom. Here's a clip of her talking
about it on the broad Ideas podcast with Rachel Bilson
and Olivia Allen.
Speaker 3 (09:12):
All Right, I need a car. I need that sense
of freedom and escape and I need to get out.
What car do I buy myself?
Speaker 2 (09:19):
But before moving to Indiana again, one of the big
decisions in my life is what car was going to
buy myself. I went on the internet. The Internet told
me I needed something real drive, a stick shift, and
bigger than a four cylinder. And I bought this Infinity
G thirty five for my first car. It was a
manual six cylinder where will drive fun little JDM twudor
(09:41):
and it was bright green. It was super flashy looking
and I loved it. And that's the car. I drove
from California to Indiana, and while I was out there,
I had one of my friends in the passenger seat
of my car and we're out of light in Bloomington, Indiana,
(10:02):
and this old Crownvic like they're what the old cop
cars were pulled up next to us at the light,
and my friend yells out the window, don't you love
my friend's car? And I was like, Jessica, you're being
so embarrassing right now. But his name's Deo, and Dao
was like, I do, Actually, you should consider coming to
(10:23):
one of our car meets, and I was like, oh,
that sounds fun. So he hands out the window like
a little time and an address of war to show
up to, and it happened to be like a couple
days later. My friend didn't come with me, And in hindsight,
I'm like, why is this sixteen year old girl showing
up to this parking garage in the middle of the
night in Indiana to go meet this random guy and whatever?
(10:45):
Like I don't in hindsight, I'm like, what the fuck? Sorry,
language was I thinking? But I ended up going and
I think I was just like I didn't have that
thought of like what if, and I don't think I've
ever really had that what's planned B or stuff like
that just went. But that's where I met B Crew
B for Bloomington and then Crew. And that's also where
(11:06):
I met Booch, who is still one of my closest
friends to this day. He became my first mentor. I'm
actually one of the groomsmen at his wedding this year.
Speaker 1 (11:19):
That's amazing.
Speaker 2 (11:20):
And the guys kind of became my found family and
they pulled me out of this really dark time and
you know, instead of partying on the weekends, which don't
get me wrong, there was a fair share of they
really helped pull me out of that and I began
upgrading turbos and swapping engines and just kind of working
(11:43):
on cars, which was everything I needed at that time.
Speaker 1 (11:46):
Without realizing it, Amelia's love for cars became her lifeline
as she slowly healed from the loss of her father.
Speaker 2 (11:53):
It was fun, it was a great distraction, and they
kind of opened me up to a world where I
could take something, tear it apart, and make it better
or faster than what it was previously. And I had
always done that in my life, like when I had
an Xbox. When I was little, I would get the
Red Ring of Death and I would tear it apart,
(12:14):
and you're supposed to stack it with pennies, and I'd
put it all back together. And I just liked the
element of taking things apart, seeing how they worked and
doing that. So when I got introduced to that for cars,
it everything just clicked at that point. And it was
also great because I feel like I've had a found
family now wherever I travel, there's a car community somewhere everywhere.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
Still, while her love for cars grew, her dream of
being an actress always played in the back of her mind.
When we come back, Amelia talks about revisiting her longtime
dream of being an actress. Now back to the show.
Speaker 2 (12:59):
I started getting this feeling of like my time years up,
like I'm ready to go back and chase this dream.
I actually couldn't turn on the television without feeling guilty
that I wasn't pursuing the one, like literally the one
thing I wanted to do in life. It's funny because
I like tried auditioning for the school play and I
(13:20):
didn't get in, and I was trying to actually apply
to like acting colleges like I tried applying to USC.
There was a Wellington, which was a school in New
Zealand that had a big focus on I was going
to try to I listen. I didn't have the money
to do it. I was just applying to see what
would happen and then figure it out from there. I also,
(13:44):
from going through everything I had went through, I felt
that I wasn't going to get what I needed from
a typical education because everything I went through I had,
I was like doing firsthand to learn. So something in
my gut was like, you need to just move back
(14:05):
to Los Angeles and just try to get work. And
I packed my little two door Japanese car I had
had another one at that point, whatever I could fit
in it, drove cross country and started this crazy adventure.
At that point, what.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
Did you do when you showed up in LA? You're like,
all right, I'm in the city limits, Like where did
you go?
Speaker 2 (14:28):
So I felt like I didn't even know La because
I didn't spend time here as a kid. I got
this little apartment in North Hollywood, But like.
Speaker 1 (14:37):
How did you find the first apartment? Like where did
you literally go when you when you showed up Craigslist,
of course.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
I and I still use like I still like I
buy cars off Craigslist today, Like I did everything on Craigslist,
and all my furniture was there from there too. So
I had previously come out to like kind of apartment,
and then I went on Craigslist. I tried to find
not only as I tried to find the most affordable apartment,
(15:07):
I also had to go see to make sure that
my car could make it up the driveway because I
drove a really low car that had no air conditioning,
was extremely loud, and I, you know, I realized after
a couple of years of being here, going to auditions
where I had sweat all down the back of my shirt,
my makeup was runny, my hair was frizzy, I'm like, okay,
(15:29):
and I'd break down sometimes I'm like, all right, I
need a reliable car for transportation that has air conditioning.
Speaker 1 (15:35):
You're like, this might not be helping me.
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah, yeah, I found. I ended up finding this place
that I then signed a lease. It was rent controlled,
which was super helpful for me at the time, and
I moved in.
Speaker 1 (15:52):
What kind of jobs did you work when you got.
Speaker 2 (15:53):
To La Everything was food and service so I worked
as I started as a bus and then I went
as a host, and then I started waiting tables, and
I did food and service for six years before starting YouTube.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
So you kept up with the cars the whole time.
Tell us a little bit about like did you keep
it up? Like what did the car piece look like
for you?
Speaker 2 (16:16):
So I was continue to work in my car. I
had to keep it running in order to get to work,
and I couldn't afford to take it to shops, and
the couple shops I hadn't taken it too, I felt
like I was always taking either overpaying or I'd get
my car back and there'd be a new issue that
wasn't there before, and the math wasn't mathing. So I
(16:40):
was like, in order to like, I just need to
keep doing it myself because I can at least trust that.
And it was also just fun. And so when I
wasn't working at a restaurant, I was at Samuel French
reading every play I could. I'd bought the agent and
manage your books, and I put together a little package
and cold mailed everyone. I thought it could be a
(17:03):
right fit to work together, and I was signing up
on casting director workshops, and I would print little headshot
cards and mail them the casting directors, and I did
everything I could on that front. And then when I
wasn't doing that, I was tinkering with my car.
Speaker 1 (17:20):
So the car tinkering ended up kind of being out
of necessity, but keep done some serious builds. Was that
during that period when it was when you were doing
the builds?
Speaker 2 (17:30):
Yeah, I think it was more just tinkering out of
necessity and just upkeep and routine maintenance and necessary upgrades.
And I after six years of mind you, it took
me nine years of being in LA before I got
my first opportunity in acting, after six years of working
(17:52):
in a restaurant. It was actually my mom who was like, honey,
you're always working on your cars. Have you ever thought
about filming it and putting it on YouTube? And I
remember so clear as like YouTube, please, Mom, What do
you know about YouTube? Moms are always right though, And
(18:13):
around the same time there was Vice Media. They were
putting together to help launch Michelin tires new PS four
US tire, which it's funny at a lot of you
listening might actually have that tire on your car, and
(18:33):
they wanted more women representation at this event because the
space is very male dominated and I had no followers
on my Instagram, but I think I was doing I
had a subrou at one point because I thought, well,
this will be more reliable than my other car, which
they're not, and I was I posted a photo like
doing breaks or something on my Subaru and someone Advice
(19:00):
had seen this post on Instagram thought we should reach out.
And I remember I was one of the restaurants I
was working out where I was like, oh, Vice Media
just reached out to me. This was like right around
the same time my mom was pressing me to do YouTube.
They want me to come just meet them and Michelin
and be a part of this event for the new
(19:23):
tire and I was so proud. I went to my
boss and he was so stoked for me. He's like, yeah, absolutely.
I was like, I need to take three days off.
He's like, you can do this, go do it. And
I like went and I saw these guys screaming at
a camera and I was like, this is YouTube. If
they could do it, I can do it. And these
(19:44):
guys are have I still talk to them today. They
were hugely helpful to where my career is today, and
they were so supportive because they also wanted to help,
like they wanted to see other women in the space
as well, so they were like, this is the camera
you want to get, and you want to put this
little fuzzy thing on. It was a G seven X
(20:05):
for those who knows cameras, and they're like, you should
put this little fuzzy thing on the mic for wind noise,
and this is the editing software we recommend you use,
and blah blah blah. And they kind of gave me
the foundation for what I needed and they're like, if
you have any questions, like, we're happy to be here
to help guide you. Obviously they're not going to do
the work for me. Nobody is. But if I needed
a little bit of advice here or there, they were
(20:27):
there for me. And when I got back, I am
not exaggerating when I say the story. I spent every
single penny in my bank account to buy a G
seven X and I bought it off Craigslist and I
met this guy at a random gas station and if
(20:47):
I remember correctly, it didn't even come with a battery.
So then I had to go save money to go
buy a battery for this camera and then go get
like SD cards and my first video, which I was
intimidated to do, but I also did plenty of research
to see what performed, what did well on YouTube, what
space and category was I putting myself in with the
(21:09):
cars that I'd be making content with, and what kind
of objective or through line should there be. So my
first video was walking around my Nissan two forty SX,
which was the car that I drove from Indiana to California.
And my idea was, and what I had voiced to
(21:33):
my non existent audience at the time, was I'm this
is my car. And I just did ten minutes walking
around the car, showing it, talking about it all the
things that needed to get done. And I set a goal,
and my goal was I'm going to rebuild this car
because I'd been sitting for a long time and learn
how to drift in one month.
Speaker 3 (21:55):
Hi guys, I'm Amelia miss Amelia on Instagram, and welcome
to my first blog. I've decided to start blogging the
build of my two forty that I've had for five
years now. Okay, guys, so as you can see those.
Speaker 2 (22:13):
Car, it's a lot of work, but I'm excited for it.
Speaker 1 (22:17):
I think it'll be fun.
Speaker 3 (22:19):
There's a lot to do, but yeah, bye bye.
Speaker 2 (22:29):
And the first video did half a million views and
I wasn't expecting it. I uploaded the video I want
snowboarding in the mountains and I had no service, and
as I was coming down the mountain, I'm like looking
at him, like, oh my god, it's done. You know,
first it was ten thousand views, then it's done twenty,
that's done, one hundred, and I'm like, oh my god,
(22:50):
like this is like, this is crazy. And I was like, okay,
well I have to keep doing it, Like I can't
just not do it now. This this is it. So
ever since then, i'd been doing three videos a week
for the last seven years, really six years the last
year after booking Grand Turismo. I'm always going to continue
(23:13):
to do YouTube, but I've tailored it back to one
video a week so I can also have a good
light work life balance, because I want to do this forever.
And I see a lot of other creators get burnt
out because of how taxing this job can be on
your mental and your physical. So I'm like, let me
get ahead of it, let me tailor it down. So
(23:34):
I can have longevity because I don't, like, I have
such an incredible audience that I feel like they're my friends,
and I feel like I can't just not call my
friends anymore, you know.
Speaker 1 (23:45):
So I want to hear what your intention was when
you say that you were very intentional about like what
the through line was, what the content was, how it
was positioning, like how you thought it about it going
in as you started it, and then it did it evolve?
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Yeah, So my initial through line was I'm going to
build this car and learn how to drift in one month.
It was a tangible goal that I could try to
achieve and it was something that the audience could understand.
What's the purpose. And it's funny because, like, again, I
had no money. I was on food stamps three different times,
and I put out this video and I'm just like,
I feel like I just lied to everyone, because how
(24:23):
the fuck am I going to afford parts? I can't
even change my oil without getting threatened to viction in
my parking garage. And through the first video, I had
one person reach out who became a friend, who then
reached connected me to another person who it kind of
snowballed into some person like people letting me borrow their
tools and some people selling me parts for cheap because
(24:46):
they could let them go. And it just like, I
love the car community because they were so willing to
help at a time just to wanting to see a
fellow audi enthusiastic person succeed with their goal. So everyone
was hugely supportive. And it was crazy because people say,
(25:06):
leap in the net will appear, and that was like
the first time that I really saw that happen. And
then slowly I started making money on the videos I
was posting, and don't get me wrong, they didn't all
do half a mil. That was just the first one.
Then when I started posting again, then they were doing
like twenty thousand, forty thousand, and then everything just kind
of evolved from there and grew larger than what I
(25:29):
could have ever imagined.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Then you became very accomplished in cars and as a
creator in YouTube, and then you came I'd say, back
to acting, because I guess, did you ever really leave it?
Liked was there ever a point where you're like, you
know what, this YouTube thing is really working out for me?
Or you were or you were always trying to get
back to.
Speaker 2 (25:49):
Acting I've always wanted to do acting. I couldn't afford
to do acting class at a certain point because I
was just trying to pay my rent, and I just
I felt so guilty because I really am so I'm
such a believer and if you have a dream, go
after it, and I just felt so guilty that I
wasn't going after it. That I do think sometimes you
(26:10):
need to step aside to reassess, build, and plan in
order to go back to doing something. Otherwise it's like,
if you do what's that saying? The definition of insanity
is doing the same thing every day and expecting different results.
So being able to step aside and create this family
also business on YouTube, it gave me, and I say
(26:33):
financial freedom lightly, but it gave me the freedom to
afford food on my table, pay my rent, and afford
acting class. And I wasn't desperate to book a job.
I got to actually enjoy the process and make unique
choices in character work. And yeah, I also saw when
(26:56):
I was a big part of the decision of starting
to YouTube too, was when I was waiting tables. The
joke is, oh, you're an actor, what restaurant do you
work at? And I saw other servers that I worked
with lose acting jobs to people who had a following
on social media, and it was still such a new
(27:17):
thing at the time. So I felt like, well, if
I could do what I love, which is building cars,
and I can also build a following, maybe just maybe
that can help me. At the same time, what was
the first acting job that you got. So the first
acting job that I got was this And I say
(27:38):
I call them little that's because what everyone calls them,
the producer, the director, all of them. It was this
little Christmas movie. It was California Christmas City Lights. So
it was their sequel to California Christmas, which was the
first movie during COVID to finish production, and it went
(27:58):
on Netflix and number one in the world for like
eight weeks or something like that. So I ended up
getting a really sweet opportunity to be in the second one,
and I had a few lines in there. And then
that team kind of became a family in a way
as well, the ESX family, and they do these smaller
(28:21):
budget Christmas movies and they've helped me to get some
more on set experience. I had met the owner of
the production company Ali through a former manager of mine,
because Ali, he and I have similar stories. I know
he'd be okay with me sharing this. But I lost
(28:43):
my dad at fifteen. He lost his mom at fifteen,
and he ended up going to the automotive world in
the same trajectory that I did. And it's funny because
I had at one point held the record for the
world's fastest new generation corvette, but he did for super
and we didn't know one another, and he went from
(29:05):
racing for subru to producing movies about cars to then
doing these feel good Christmas movies. Allie's become like a
father to me. I'm very grateful that he was introduced
to me and is in my life. But from there
is how I got Grand Turismo. I had done like
a little Netflix thing back in the day called Fastest Car.
(29:27):
And it's funny because I actually like everyone's like, why
are you doing this? Like because I was losing money.
I didn't get paid for it. Everyone thinks, how I
must have made a lot of money. I was just like, oh, yeah,
I'll do it if I can do like this fun
race and maybe get a Netflix credit, which could be cool.
But I was more stoked about the fact that they
were going to give me x amount of money to
put a roll cage in my car because in order
(29:48):
to race, for them to get insurance, mic or had
to be safe and I couldn't afford it. So I
was like, well, they're going to pay for it and
I get to race, Like why not. I had really
enjoyed the show previously. They allow you just to like
share your story and hopefully inspire others, and then you
get to race a four wide drag race, which is
(30:09):
kind of how I got into drag racing. Because my
little Nissan two forty SX, I decided for this Fastest
Car show, I would convert my drift car into a
drag car, and that's what I did, and I loved it,
and then that's kind of how I became obsessed with
drag racing. But I did the show. They flew boots
(30:31):
out from Indiana, which is super sweet, and one of
the producers on Grand Turismo had seen that episode. He
was also a fan of the show started following me
on Instagram. I didn't know this, and when I was
posting about the carpet premier stuff for the ESX productions
I was a part of, he saw that, oh she's acting.
(30:53):
We actually have a role in this movie. We should
have her audition for casting. I guess loved me and
the rest of this history.
Speaker 1 (31:02):
What kind of impact did that have on your trajectory?
It's such a huge, huge thing.
Speaker 2 (31:07):
Yeah, it's so easy to feel hopeless at times, and
especially in this industry. Like a week before, I was like,
when they say it takes ten years to be an
overnight success, it took me ten years to like, I
felt like, really just start. But that job gave me
so much hope, and I don't I keep talking about
(31:28):
how I meet these incredible people along my life, and
it sounds cheesy, but I am grateful, and I think
that's something that I can always rely on myself to
be as grateful because I believe there is good in everyone,
and I do think people want to see others succeed,
and yeah, I've I think I've also been through enough
(31:49):
to see so much negativity that I'd rather just have
that outlook on life of being surrounded by great people.
Speaker 1 (31:57):
Amelia's positive outlook on life has not always come. She's
been open about her struggles with mental health, depression, and anxiety.
When we come back, Amelia talks about how she found
help amidst her struggles. Now back to the show. So
(32:18):
you've spoken openly about how you've struggled with mental health,
with depression and anxiety. How has that manifested itself for you?
Speaker 2 (32:26):
I feel like dealing with it is literally what I
did for so long. It took me a very, very,
very long time to find a therapist. So spent a
lot of time trying to find a good therapist. I'm
very big on working out. I think working out every
day or even just taking a thirty minute walk outside,
getting some sunlight's very important. Taking your multi vitamins as
(32:49):
you know, cheesy as that sounds, and getting good proper
sleep and all that, and surrounding yourself with good people
and all that. It's all easier said than done, but
super important to do. And also just proper education in
learning about you know, you take care of your physical health,
how do you take care of your mental health?
Speaker 1 (33:09):
I should continue to educate herself. Amelia has made it
a point to educate her audience alongside her becoming a
staunch mental health advocate.
Speaker 3 (33:18):
Just spread love, spread kindness, be kind Know that everyone
is fighting a battle that.
Speaker 2 (33:24):
You know nothing about. If you guys, don't have peers
or family that you can reach out to, or just
need someone to call. There is an emergency hotline that
you can talk to someone. It's really sad when people
believe or at that mental state where they feel suicide
(33:47):
is their only option. And I promise you that it
is not. There is a lot at the end of
the tunnel. Things will get better and there are people
here for you. And that's kind of how I found
Alive and Well because that's the non profit that I'm
on the board of, because their through line was we'd
rather put a fence around a cliff than an ambulance
(34:07):
or rehearsed at the bottom. And how they've done that
was really through education and starting with trying to educate
young adults with proper mental health care. And we in
Atlanta work with various schools and therapists to help educate
(34:31):
and also to help subsidize, So we're working on subsidizing
the cost of mental health care. I'd like to try
to find a way where we can eventually make it
cost free for people and so much more so. Yeah,
I found them trying to learn and educate myself and
(34:51):
that's been great.
Speaker 1 (34:53):
Is there anything in particular where at the time you
felt like was really like a low point or a setback,
but now in retrospect you see it as having really
launched you to where you are now.
Speaker 2 (35:05):
Yeah, I mean quite frankly, my dad's death. I know
I wouldn't be where I am today. I know I
wouldn't be as grounded or as hard working. It sounds
so fucked up to say this, because I wish my
dad were still here today, but it was probably one
of the best things to happen to me and my family.
Keep in mind the abuse and the struggles that we
(35:29):
went through and what he was struggling with as well.
Is weird as it sounds. That changed my life for
the better and it has made me who I am today,
and I am weirdly grateful for that.
Speaker 1 (35:42):
Well, thank you so much for being on with us
and being such an open book.
Speaker 2 (35:46):
Oh thank you. I really do appreciate you having me on.
Speaker 1 (35:51):
Amelia is continuing to advocate for more mental health resources
and care, all while breaking world records as a car
builder and driver, not forget her career as an actress.
To stay up to date on everything Amelia is up
to follow her on Instagram at miss Amelia You can
also find a list of mental health resources on our website,
(36:12):
she Pivots the Podcast under our causes page. Thanks for
listening to this episode of she Pivots. If you've made
it this far, you're a true pivoter, so thanks for
being part of this community. I hope you enjoyed this episode,
and if you did leave us a rating, please be nice.
Tell your friends about us. To learn more about our guests,
(36:32):
follow us on Instagram at she pivots the Podcast, or
sign up for our newsletter where you can get exclusive
behind the scenes content, or on our website, she Pivots
the Podcast Talk to You next Week. Special thanks to
the she Pivots team, Executive producer Emily Edavlosk, Associate producer
and social media connoisseur Hannah Cousins, Research director Christine Dickinson,
(36:57):
Events and Logistics coordinator, Madeleine snow vic An, audio editor
and mixer Nina pollock I endorse Te Pivots
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