Picture yourself in the shoes of a man who has lost his brother to suicide and succumbed to the depths of alcohol addiction. That's the raw and heart-wrenching journey of our guest, Jared Zimmerman, whose courage led him to ultimate recovery. Today's podcast with Jared Zimmerman will impact you no matter who you are. Both Jared and his wife’s family are what we affectionally call a “grove family.” That means that both of their families went to school with ours at the little country school called Forest Grove. Heartache still finds its way into beautiful families raising kids out in the country, as you will soon hear. God has woven together a story of suicide, addiction, family, and strength that, as painful as it is, Jared is using that story for God's purpose. Jared and Summer are a living testimony of what it looks like to live your faith out loud to encourage and walk alongside others in their pain. As he paints a vivid picture of his struggles, from the anguish of losing his brother to the stigma of mental health, we can't help but be moved by his resilience and determination.
We'll introduce you to the amazing business they recently launched, "Inspire One Life," a beacon of hope for those battling mental health challenges. Driven by their personal experiences, they are turning their pain into a platform for spreading positivity and mental health awareness. As we discuss the poignant messages conveyed by their merchandise, you'll be inspired by their resilience and determination. Summer shared a verse with me that seemed very fitting as I sat with them.
Proverbs 27:17 As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another. Knowing these two lovely people since they were very young made it even more special to sit and share our stories together; even more special is that these are things that the fingerprints of God are all over.
There's a special meaning to that last sentence; listen for it in the podcast!
You can find out more about Inspire 1 Life!
Website: www.inspire1life.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/inspireonelife/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/inspireonelifeapparel
About the She Surrenders Podcast:
On the She Surrenders podcast we are talking about women, faith and addiction all on the same platform. There are many podcasts for women and sobriety, but very few for women seeking information and stories from others about faith-based recovery.
Help us reach more listeners: like, subscribe, review, and share.
Find us on Instagram @shesurrenders_sherry, on Facebook @shesurrenderssherry, and online at www.shesurrenders.com.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
Welcome back to the she Surrenders podcast.
I'm your host, sherri, and oneach episode we share with you
what happens when you put downyour addictions and pick up the
promises that God has for you ina brand new life of recovery.
I have another great episodefor you today, so let's get
started.
So we're here with JaredZimmerman today, and I am so
(00:26):
excited that you're here.
It's been a long time.
I've known you more as a kid.
While you're still a kid as faras I'm concerned, in my mind
you're one of the four Zimmermanboys singing fingerprints of
God in front of church and thedream where you guys two still
are.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
But with all the matching suits and all the
matching.
Thank you, Grandma.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Yes, you could have done weddings if you would have
kept it up.
But yeah, so I reached out toJared because he recently posted
on his Instagram that he hadnine years alcohol free and I
thought that needed to berecognized and I wanted to know
more.
So I've known the Zimmermanfamily for a long time, but I
(01:11):
did not know this, Jared, so Iwanted you to share your story.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I'd love to, and, starting Well before we jump in,
I did have a question and I wasgoing to ask you before we
started this.
But with knowing you, since Iwas a kid, we were always raised
to use Mr and Mrs, so sayingyour first name feels super
weird.
Do you prefer Sherry or?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I feel like that's hard.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Because it's been on my mind.
That's been the thing I've beenthe most kind of nervous about.
I'm like man.
Am I at that age yet where Ican be an adult?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I think you are.
I think you just call me.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Sherry, it feels weird, though If you're
comfortable with it, I'm finewith it.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
I prefer to ask, though I think there's a rite of
passage that happens that youcan call me Sherry, I think
you're there, I will take it,let's do it.
If you called me anything else,I feel extremely old while
we're doing this.
So, sherry, it is.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Perfect.
Well, thank you so much forjust giving me the opportunity
to be here.
Starting off, I guess, a littlebit of the backstory was in
March 13 of 2014,.
I actually received a phonecall and went over.
I was living in St Joe at thetime St Joseph, michigan and got
(02:38):
a phone call from a familymember just to go and help them
out at their house and just hadthis feeling like something just
didn't feel right the whole wayover there.
When I was over there, I foundout that my older brother,
justin, who was older than me by15 months, had actually taken
his life From there, and there'sa whole whole long story
(03:03):
between then and now.
But we grew up 15 months apart.
So pretty much is that older,younger brother of when one
brother does something, theother brother does that and
you're constantly competing.
And we were wrestling practicepartners.
We were the same size, sameheight, everything.
I mean.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
He took my clothes 90% of the time I never knew who
was who.
I really didn't.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Well, most people actually thought until we got to
a point where I got a littlebit taller than him, most people
thought we were twins.
We even wrestled against eachother at a few tournaments
because we were the same weightand that was awful.
But kind of going down thatroad was.
It was one of those thingswhere and I'm sure you've seen
(03:49):
this in your own children wherewhen one kid's allowed to do
this we talked about thisbriefly but when one kid can
finally watch a PG-13 movie,it's like by default, you get
that trickle down of everyoneelse.
And that's how it was withJustin and I, where he would be
(04:09):
allowed to see a certain type ofmovie than I was, because I was
a little bit younger than him.
When he started he cussed forthe first time like I'm like, oh
, it's okay if I do it.
And then it was the same withalcohol.
And we both, you know,throughout high school sports we
were both very clean, we didn'tdrink, we didn't touch it.
After we both graduated was awhole nother story and it was
(04:29):
that kind of typical path that alot of people go down is, you
know, oh, I'm out of the house,I'm allowed to drink, I'm an
adult now.
And yeah, I mean we were.
It was just innocent partying.
What we didn't realize is thatuntil after he passed away was
that he struggled with it a lotmore than we realized.
(04:51):
It wasn't just partying.
And then, kind of going back tome, following in his footsteps,
I started going down the exactsame path as him.
So, you know, after the dayafter his funeral I took off,
went back to St Joe and justthought I could just isolate
myself and work through it on myown.
You know it's hard to even likearticulate everything that
(05:14):
you're feeling, but it's a mixof like anger, like angry with
God, but at the same timeneeding him, but at the same
time turning away from him andthinking that you can do it on
your own.
And yeah, I started going downthat path for seven or eight
months where it was just I wasdrinking all the time and just
(05:36):
ruminating constantly on kind ofwhere his mind was at and what
led him to suicide, and evenlike talking about it was such a
like.
You know I'm now in that groupof like oh, my brother, you know
, died by suicide, like it wasalmost shame around that.
But then I started making thesame decisions that he was
(05:58):
making, where it was somethingthat was constantly on my mind
and I don't know if you'll haveany questions of that further.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
or I was just thinking did you ever feel like
you could figure out, like maybethat would help you figure out
where Justin's head was, youknow his why, and all that like
if you, if you were slippinginto his shoes, you know like
into his mindset, as you werekind of following?
Speaker 2 (06:23):
That's a good question.
I don't know if it was whichkind of came first, if it was me
constantly thinking about itthat started making me kind of
go into his shoes and follow him, or if me trying to step into
his shoes, then I startedthinking about it more.
I mean, like I'm not positive,but I do know that like I went
(06:46):
through this phase because himand I we were so close and we
were such good friends that whenhe did pass away it was that
that almost guilt, because wewere drinking, him and I were
drinking a lot, and like therewere times where I, even to this
day, where, like my mind willstart to question like, did I
(07:08):
miss something because I wasdrunk with him?
Did we ever have a conversation?
And I just don't remember itbecause I was at a point, you
know, I was blackout drunk, likewe were just having fun, you
know.
And I still like there's timeswhere I catch myself questioning
that and just kind of lettingthe enemy into my mind, and but
then I really it was trying tofigure out why he did it.
(07:31):
That I think led me to goingdown that path of self
destruction where I mean Iremember when I first got home
after he passed away, I wentthrough all of his drawers.
I mean it was I ended up movingback home, you know, after this
, which is, you know, furtherdown the story, but I was.
(07:52):
I would take the drawers out ofhis the room he was living in
and check under to see if hewrote anything on the drawers.
I took the mattress off the bedand was checking like the
little support beams that holdmattresses up.
I checked to see if he left anote on those.
Like you're just looking foreverywhere and when you start to
you start to look for things,you're going to see it.
(08:14):
So, like when you're lookingand ruminating on depression or
alcohol or fill in the blankwith whatever your struggle is,
you're going to see more of that.
And if that's what youconstantly dwell on, that that
starts to consume you.
So that's where I was at.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
If that answer.
I don't know if that answersyour question, it does, and I
can see how it doesn't help tolet go either.
No it keeps you very stuck andnot able to move on.
Yeah, but also how close youguys were.
It makes sense.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
Well, it's hard to let go and you don't even.
You don't know how, you're notprepared for it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
And but yeah, so I started drinking and I wouldn't
say that I was at a point whereI was addicted to it, but I
would say that I was.
I was using it as somethingthat I almost could have an
(09:10):
excuse if something bad happenedto me, that it wasn't me making
the decision, it was thealcohol or it was a multitude of
things.
It was an escape, it was anexcuse for something bad
happening to me and I think that, kind of going back to how you
brought up the post, there was amoment where I was actually in
(09:34):
Central Michigan.
I drove up there for theweekend and I was drinking all
night long.
It was actually seven in themorning and most people were in
bed by two, three AM and I hadrealistically drank enough to
where I probably should havebeen unconscious, because I was
at a point where the last fourhours after everybody was done
(09:54):
drinking, I was staring atpictures of him and drinking
alone in a room and crying Manlytears.
But crying.
But no, I had this moment, likewe all do and I know I posted
this, but when you're drinkingsometimes you have to pee and I
got up and I went to thebathroom and I just caught my
(10:14):
own reflection and I had this,like it's so hard to explain,
but I had this moment where justthis complete clarity, like a
snap of just clarity, and I justheard this voice that said
you're next.
And I don't know if it was mydrunk self talking to myself or,
(10:35):
like me, I firmly believe itwas God.
And in that moment I just hadthis visualization of everything
that I had just lived through,of finding out about Justin's
death, driving back home, seeingmy family for the first time,
all of us crying with extendedfamily and his friends going to
his visitation, and just theline of people that were there
(10:56):
going to his funeral, and like Isaw that all again.
But it wasn't him in the casket, it was me.
And the only thing that I justhad, this moment where I was
like I can't do that to myfamily, like I was still at a
point where I didn't care if Ilived or died but, I was like I
just can't do that to them.
And from there that was kind ofa pivotal point where I started.
(11:19):
I drank two or three more timesafter that because I'm a slow
learner to ask my wife.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Well, sometimes we have to make sure I can relate
to that.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
But yeah, after that I was.
That was kind of the moment,though If I had to say there was
a moment that led to a decision, that was the spark.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yeah, and I'm with you.
I believe it was God, 100%.
I always say God will never goto the bar with you.
God will never sit at the barwith you.
He will, but he will wait.
He will wait for you to comeback out, and I believe that he
probably met you in the bathroom.
Yeah, so, yeah.
(12:01):
So that happened, and nowyou're not drinking, so you've
lost the numbing effect from allthat pain.
So now, how are you dealingwith it?
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Well, I would say so it's.
We're coming up on 10 yearssince he passed away.
I think it's such a tough thingto answer.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
What mode did you go in?
We'll start gradually, so afterthat, what did you do?
Speaker 2 (12:28):
So it was a culmination of things.
It was actually one of the lasttimes I drank was at a wedding.
So we had this cousin that waskind of like that, that fun
cousin where Justin and I wouldjust we'd write raps for her and
like we'd just goof off.
I mean, and you know, she tookus to R rated movies when we
weren't supposed to go to Rrated movies and that cousin.
(12:50):
We always told her like, oh,we're going to dress up as a
dumb and dumber when you getmarried, whenever that day comes
.
And that day came and he wasn'tthere and I still went and got
the suit and I was wearing theorange suit, Actually had the
right styling and everything.
It was amazing.
But my cousin was he wore theother colored suit and I mean,
(13:15):
bless him, he was doingeverything he could to just fill
that spot and we got there andI mean it's actually sad when
you see, I've watched throughthe videos of that wedding and
my dad's one of those people whoalways has the I don't know if
you remember him from wrestlingand he always has the recorder.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Thank goodness they got smaller over the years.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
But I watched through it and every time you see the
bar in the background I'mstanding there.
And because it was just thatfinal reminder of like he's not
here and I got so drunk thatnight that I just had a
breakdown.
(13:57):
I don't remember it.
I know that my dad heard me saya lot of swear words, I won't
repeat, but I pretty much.
It got to the point where hewas like hey, are you willing to
get help?
And I admitted that I neededhelp.
So that was kind of two stepsin.
One was not drinking, but thenI started going to therapy and
(14:19):
which isn't something thatthere's such a stigma around all
of this stuff I mean, whetherit's sobriety, whether it's
mental health, whether it'sgetting help like there's a
stigma around even asking forhelp and letting people know
you're struggling, which iscrazy.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Because it's one of the best things I've ever done,
and not that that therapist toldme anything that my parents or
friends couldn't have told me,but it was just somebody who was
detached from the entiresituation where, like there were
things that I was carrying thatlike I didn't feel like I could
tell my parents at the time orthat.
(14:54):
I could talk to my siblings, or,and so I would say that was
kind of the first step, butultimately is just facing it, I
mean, and just kind of facing ithead on and leaning on the
people that that can support youthrough it too.
Not trying to do it on my ownCause.
I've gone that route and I'vefallen off track and done that
(15:14):
too, and again stubborn.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Yeah, but we do think we can handle it on our own.
And another good reason youknow to seek therapy in a
situation like that is you knowwe were talking before we
started recording.
You know that I had lost abrother, and there's also this
part of you that wants toprotect your parents from any
more hurt.
And the last thing I wanted myparents to know was that I was
(15:39):
struggling with anything.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
It wasn't alcohol at the time, but I was more worried
about how they were doing thanhow I was doing by far, because
I couldn't imagine inflictingany more hurt on them or worry,
and I'm sure you felt the sameway I did and it's actually
crazy because when we have that,that need to care for others
(16:02):
almost right we're so willing tomake sure, like you're hurting,
but you're wanting to make surethat you're not hurting
somebody else.
So you're caring for them butit's hurting you.
And the funny thing is is thatmy parent, like everybody in my
family, was doing that when it'slike for me.
I was going, I was living in StJoe for a while, but I was
still driving either up Northback home to see family.
(16:25):
Like I was checking on everyone.
I was putting on that mask oflike I'm fine, I'm smiling all
the time, inside I'm in, I'm amess, but like I'm good.
And because I wanted to showthem like that I'm okay.
At the same time, my parentsare like all they concern their
concern was was making suretheir kids were okay and they
(16:47):
were putting their own health onthe back.
So it was like we're all tryingto make sure that we're okay and
, you know, bless my, I'mincredibly blessed to have the
parents that I do Like they sawthrough it and they were so dead
set on making sure that theirkids not just myself but, you
know, my other siblings and mylittle sister, which is one of
(17:08):
my other siblings but all of uswere that we were gonna be okay
and that we weren't going to godown the same path as my brother
, because, statistically, youknow, the likelihood
dramatically increases if you'velost a sibling or a family
member to suicide.
So, yeah, I mean they werewatching.
I mean they were like hawks.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
So who's grieving really yeah?
Speaker 2 (17:33):
that's a good question.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Yeah, everybody's concerned about each other and
trying to deal with itthemselves, so, but you were
really the only one who pickedup a substance in the beginning.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
That I know of.
Yeah, I mean-.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Because alcohol wasn't a big thing in your
family growing up.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
No, not at all.
I mean to the point where I saw.
I don't know if I ever saw mydad drink up until the time I
was legally allowed to.
They'd have like a Mike's Hard.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Living Right right, Something like that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
So yeah, I'd seen that, but no, it was, I mean not
in our family, like not at all.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Right, how old were you when you quit drinking?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
When I quit drinking.
I would have been oh man,you're making me do math that
was not a prerequisite.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Okay, nine years ago.
Yeah, nine years ago.
Oh, so I'm gonna date myself.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I would be what?
22 when I quit my wife'ssmiling and giving me a heads up
.
So she's like you did your yeah, but yeah, so I was 22.
I was 21 when he passed away.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
And then 22.
I always make the joke that Idrank more before I was legally
allowed than after, but-.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
You know and I've said this before, I think I said
it to another young man thatwas on the podcast once I used
to look at you know the fewtimes I went to AA, there was
always young people on therethat had to get their slip
signed.
You know, they got a DUI orwhatever and some of them were
in real trouble and I thought tomyself the mindset I was in
(19:11):
back then.
Gosh, that really stinks.
It's you have to quit drinkingand you're only 22, whatever, at
least I got to drink till I was, you know, 40 or so Well, I was
actually older than that.
But now I look at it wholedifferent perspective and think
(19:31):
you are so lucky that you quitwhen you did.
Look how much more time youhave to be healthy and whole and
make a difference and pursue,you know, your passions and your
dreams and not have somethinglike alcohol keep you from that.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Well, and just to be alive.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
And to be alive.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
The direction I was going with.
I mean, there's no doubt in mymind that I wouldn't be here If
I had continued to go down thepath that I was going down like.
So, yeah, I completely agree,it's been one of the biggest
blessings that has ever happened.
And it also led to.
It was a not just a decision, Ithink, at that moment to want
(20:18):
to get sober, but I think it wasmore of a, a decision and a
conviction to want to live too,because I think the two were
tied so heavily together at thatpoint where me saying I was
gonna stop drinking was also mesaying, all right, I'm not gonna
give up, like I'm going to getback up, I'm gonna dust myself
(20:40):
off and I'm gonna find help.
I'm not gonna do it myself.
But because I mean, if you lookat, like if I had a chart of
just positive habits that havechanged, like that was one of
the big, it was that therapy.
And then I mean, even I look atthe kind of person I was when I
was drinking and just a fewshort months later to, I mean,
(21:01):
my wife's right for anyonelistening, my wife is sitting
right next to me, but thatversion of myself that was
drinking and partying and beingstupid, would have never been
the kind of person my now wifewould have wanted to go after or
wanted to be with, becausethat's just.
We wouldn't have been alignedin who we are, you know, with
(21:22):
our just, our habits and ourvalues and our character, and
that was another decision.
So it was like sobriety goingto therapy, like going back,
moving back home, which was thatwas an ego shot too when I'm 22
, most of my friends aregraduating college and they're
(21:42):
getting adult jobs and they'regetting salaries, and here I am
still not sure what I want to dowith my life.
But I was working and I burnedmyself out because I went right
back to work.
After his funeral, I moved backhome and you know, even that
just like.
But it was a good decisionbecause I leaned in on the
(22:04):
people that were there for meand I think, no matter what it
is that we're struggling with,like, it's okay to lean on
people.
There's seasons for everythingin life, whether it's a family
member, a friend, you know, aspouse.
You don't have to go like, youdon't have to go through the
journey alone.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Right and in your case, your parents had had a
little time.
They were able to be strong foryou, summer.
Your wife was able to be.
It's okay to lean on.
It's.
There's times in life where wedo have to lean on others that
are stronger than us, andthere'll be times in your life
(22:43):
where you're strong andsomeone's going to lean on you,
and I just feel like that justis God's timing of how he works
things out.
And the problem is is that wecarry so much shame about that
asking for help and we getourselves in a pretty deep hole
before we're willing to ask forhelp sometimes.
(23:04):
And I often think too, if Iwould have asked for help but I
had the fierce belief that Icould fix this and I would fix
it.
And a lot of times I was like,how's that working for you?
And it's not, but for somereason I thought the next day
was going to be different, youknow.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And even if you do fix it, it's like, well, okay, I
could go about this my own wayand what?
It takes me 10 years to figureit out.
Or lean on people who haveeither been there or they have
experience, they have differentperspectives.
It's like, okay, or I canshortcut it.
Not shortcut it like shortcutthe time and get there a lot
quicker and save myself all thepain that they have gone through
(23:47):
because they have their ownexperiences of life or whatever
it is.
Like so yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
You know, get in and do the work, yeah, Do what it
takes.
You know, instead of just youknow, there's a lot of people
that when they quit drinking,that's all they do quit drinking
and expect life to changemiraculously for the better.
But there's a lot more thatgoes along with it.
(24:13):
Because I think God expects usto change, because I feel like
when I quit drinking and I thinkit's very evident with you too
God kind of said okay, great,thank goodness he stopped,
because now I can use you, let'sget.
We've got work to do.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Yeah, yeah, a lot of work to do.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
And it didn't happen overnight.
So I'll let you pick up whatyou did for a while and where
you went, and I love the storyof how you and Summer got
together that you shared with me.
You know what I'm sharing alittle bit of that.
Yeah, so Because you guys, Ididn't even know you were like
married and I knew both of youas kids.
(24:54):
I'm like wait, they're together.
For Skrull I'll tell you whatYup For Skrull.
That's right.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Yeah, so I mean it really ties into that decision
to move back home and kind ofstart to rebuild.
It was at a time where I was Iwasn't working, I was struggling
and our parent, our mom,started scheming, as they
(25:20):
sometimes do.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Another force-growing mom.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Yeah and no.
They set up a game night andshe was at the time recovering
from ankle surgery which wasactually a career in Indian
ankle surgery for volleyball.
She was playing for Hope andgoing through some of her own
battles and we ended up gettingtogether at this game night.
And I think the first gamenight was more of a coincidence.
(25:48):
And then our mom saw ustogether and like okay.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
Well, let's start to formulate something.
Yes.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
And yeah, I mean it was just one of those things
where I think we were bothstruggling and God just brought
two broken people together and,you know, found healing through
that too, which is funny becausegrowing up, Jonah was in my
younger brother was in her grade.
And I was in her olderbrother's grade and I was always
(26:17):
telling Jonah, I'm like bro,you got to go after that girl.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
She's going to be.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
she was athletic and not it sounds really creepy when
you say it now as an old person, like talk, but as an old
person when you're older and I'mlike, I'm like, bro, you got to
go after that girl.
She's going to be cute, she'sathletic and then and then yeah,
I'm married to her.
So then, kind of going fromthere, we I mean there's so much
(26:41):
to try and condense, but I mean, when it comes to and we were
talking about habits a littlebit earlier before we started
this, and I think this isactually a really a really
important topic, especiallywe're going into the new year A
lot of people are motivated,they're wanting to make a shift,
and we talked about just whenyou have something that you're
(27:06):
getting rid of, you always wantto replace it.
So you know, if it's like forme, I went from alcohol and I
cut that out and it was like Ihad a death grip on fitness and
nutrition and I replaced thatbad habit with a good habit and
it was.
It was good at the time, but Iwas so strict around it that it
started to limit me from livingmy life and traveling and having
(27:27):
experiences with family andfriends.
But a lot of people, whenthey're wanting to make a change
, whether it's sobriety or evenit's like just healthy habits
eating healthier or going andgetting active or whatever it
may be the change that you'rewanting to do.
So many people think that theyhave to add something.
Okay, well, I'm going to wakeup earlier and do this and then
(27:51):
do this.
And it's like they.
I don't know if you've ever hadpeople ask you like what can I
start doing?
What can I start doing?
We think we have to add more toour plate, when a lot of times,
it's actually addition bysubtraction, where it's like
okay, well, what am I doingright now?
Or it's like okay, look at yourphone and how much you use your
screen time.
Like, if you're looking at, ifyou do that, I'm warning you, if
(28:13):
you do that, you're going toget a root away, canine, because
it's going to be like oh, youuse you look at Instagram three
hours a day.
Yeah, but a lot of times, ifyou take the approach of
addition by subtraction, whereit's like okay, well, if I just
take one hour or less of screentime a day, then by default we
talked about it.
Just, you're always going tofill that void with something,
(28:33):
and that's where you can startto allow yourself to fill that
void with something healthier.
So, instead of waking up orinstead of going out to the bar
or doing something.
It's like well, maybe I go fora walk instead, like, but you're
not going to find that thinguntil you get rid of the other
thing first, versus trying tojust fit everything in at once.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Right, because we tend to.
I think we go into directburnout and overwhelm ourselves
when I mean, if I look at theridiculous list I used to have
ready to go, that we're allgoing to help me quit drinking,
you know, around fitness dietand oh yeah, in the meantime
I'll quit drinking because allthese things will take effect.
No, they never worked, you know, because the expectations were
(29:18):
so high.
Yeah, I mean they wereridiculous and yeah, so they
never worked at all.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
No, we try to do too much.
We think that it's like I'mgoing to do this, this, this,
this, this, and it looks perfecton paper, but we haven't taken
the time to develop those habitsor what it's going to take to
actually make that happen when abetter approach is like hey,
just start with one thing justsomething simple.
Okay, if you want to wake upearlier, don't set your alarm
(29:46):
for two or three hours earlier.
Just this week, I'm going towake up 15 minutes earlier.
Next week, I'm going to set itanother five, 10, 15 minutes
earlier.
Eventually, you're going tohave that natural adaptation
where you're up two hoursearlier and you have more time,
or whatever it is.
But yeah, that's a great pointof just, we try to do so much
and we crush it for a week andthen we just fall flat on our
(30:08):
face.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
And then you feel like a huge failure and then you
got to deal with that.
So.
But I think the black and whitethinking is very typical,
especially in early sobriety,because we also have this belief
that if we can fix that, youknow, if we can let go of that,
surely we're strong enough tofix everything else, you know.
(30:30):
But I've seen the black andwhite thinking in myself and a
lot of other people graduallyjust diminish over the years.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
There's seasons for everything and there's different
phases of life too, where youknow, for somebody that like for
me at a time, that was great.
And I still like to track food,because if I don't track food I
fall off.
Like I just I love sugar but italso just messes me up, like.
But it's one of those thingswhere it's amazing how much we
(30:58):
talked about shame earlier andjust how much our society and
just our own, just our ownconversation.
There's so much shame aroundeverything Like.
There's shame around asking forhelp.
There's shame around not beingable to do it ourselves.
There's shame around even likeif you start something and you
don't get.
You know, maybe you're supposedto hit 11,000 steps and one day
(31:19):
you don't get those steps.
There's shame around where it'slike and we think so black and
white, whereas the reality isand I'm going to use diet just
because I've been a nutritioncoach and fitness and all that
but let's say you eat, you knowthree meals a day and you're
supposed to hit 2000 caloriesand a perfect day would be you
(31:40):
hitting that perfectly.
But with black and whitethinking, if you only eat, let's
say, 200 of those calories, youmess up and you have a snack.
Black and white thinking saysoh, I failed, I'm a failure.
But realistically, no, youdidn't fail the day.
You, you messed up on what afraction of a percent of the day
Like so and when you look at itrealistically, it gives
(32:02):
yourself.
You can give yourself gracethrough the process of okay,
yeah, tomorrow I can do betterIf that's my goal, but it
doesn't make me a failure.
I just failed that specificmoment.
I didn't fail the entire day.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah, but with a lot of thinking whether, and
especially while we're drinkingit was like well, I screwed up.
Might as well keep going, ohyeah.
Or the you know, having thehandful of candy that you
weren't planning on.
Well, I screwed up.
Might as well keep going, I'mstill guilty of that.
I'm not going to lie, I'm notlike I used to be, but that used
(32:37):
to be a huge problem.
Like now, I'm like well, maybeI'll keep going, I don't know,
but I don't know, but I don'tknow, peanut M&Ms.
I tell you what, oh my gosh, itjust must be a thing.
Speaker 2 (32:47):
It's so bad.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Because they are, I swear they're like, they're like
the, they're like the healingpower for the you know, like
until the next day, when youjust have a headache.
Yeah, I don't even.
They don't even give me aheadache.
I mean, I feel like.
I feel like God made peanutM&Ms just for the person that
conquered drinking, like youknow what, and the family size,
(33:11):
like if you quit you get thefamily size.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
That's the full bag, right?
Yeah, that's $9.99 at Walgreensyou know like that's worth it.
You know my wife's laughingbecause that's like that's my
go-to.
If I'm going to have M&Ms, it'sthe peanut M&Ms.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Yes yes, because alcohol used to cost a lot more
than that.
That's what I always say oh man, yeah you got to laugh about it
.
So I want to move into you guys.
You moved away for a little bitduring COVID, tried some
different things and you movedback for a reason to try
(33:44):
something new, and I want mylisteners to hear about that.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, so we actually lived in Missouri and then
Oklahoma, so this is our firstwinter back and it's snowing
right now as we're doing this.
Yes, but we actually, I wouldsay the reason we moved back, it
wasn't initially for thebusiness.
We knew we wanted to start abusiness, but I think it hit
(34:08):
both of us that we didn't wantto do life without our family in
it.
We moved away and I think it'sone of the best decisions we
made to move away because itgave us time to be and start our
relationship alone and justhave to lean on each other and
(34:29):
just have that, the challenge ofthat and then.
But when we move back, I alsosay that moving back was one of
the best decisions we ever madetoo, because it was our choice
to come back here and theperspective that we got of
wanting to be with our familyand wanting to just be connected
and just plant roots andactually like, want to like for
(34:52):
the first time in my life.
I've always wanted to move awayand I never knew, I never
thought I would move back toMichigan once I moved away.
But and I and just not to gooff topic but I think as a
society a lot of the strugglewith mental health and there's a
lot of things that stem fromthat.
I think alcohol is something,drugs, just isolation.
(35:16):
It's that mindset of notneeding, not having to be
connected to people that youknow, not planning roots, not,
you know, ever having a itdoesn't have to be family, but
not having your core group ofpeople in your community.
Because we've gone into a worldof everything.
You know I don't need to go tothe store, I can order it off
Amazon and have it at my door.
(35:37):
I can.
You know, I don't even have totalk to somebody if I go to the
store because I can go through aself-checkout versus actually
slowing down and having aconversation with somebody,
connecting with somebody.
So I think we realized thatthere was, even though we were
meeting people and we love thepeople that we worked with, we
love the people that weconnected with and the
relationships that we developedthere was this void in our lives
(36:02):
that we knew that wasn't goingto be filled by that, and it was
.
It was a void.
I'd say it was two things.
It was spiritually.
We weren't growing.
We were trying we're kind ofdating churches, but I wasn't
being a spiritual leader.
That she needed and thankfullyshe challenged me on that, so,
(36:22):
but also we just we weren'tgetting connected.
It was.
It was one of those things werelike, oh well, we might move
again, so what's the point inconnecting with people?
Oh, we might, we might moveagain, so why get involved with
the church?
And so coming home and justhaving that connection, but also
just wanting to, just wantingto be here and wanting to
connect with people and wantingto have a community where we can
(36:44):
engage and we and you can leanon people again and you don't
have to do it all yourself, andthen going into the next step as
we got here and it's like, okay, well, what are we gonna do?
Because we've both been insales and we're at a position
where it's like, you know, wedon't have kids yet and we both
(37:06):
have talked about starting abusiness.
We've always, you know, we'vewanted to and just to see, just
to at least say whether wesucceed or fail, to at least say
we tried and I had had thisidea actually initially after
Justin passed away.
That was my brother's name, ifI didn't mention.
Say it earlier, but for thelisteners, yeah but I had this
(37:26):
idea and it just came to me whenI was reading one night inspire
one life or inspire one fitness.
It was when I was heavy intofitness at first.
Okay, and I started going downthat path and it was actually
gaining some traction and I hadno idea and I actually just
imposter syndrome and doubt andfear and just I stopped
(37:46):
completely and I always feltagain shame.
I felt ashamed of it when peoplewould ask me about it or people
.
I saw people wearing the shirtslike there's so much shame,
because I felt like a failure.
I felt like, oh well, this is,this was a great idea, but since
I quit, I can never do it again.
And we just we talked about itand we're just sitting there and
we're talking about businessideas and whether it's fitness
(38:08):
or supplementation or you know,whatever it is sales, and it was
just everything was moneyfocused.
We're like, okay, how can wemake the quickest money?
And, you know, start so we canget a house and we can start a
family.
And and then, just one day, welooked at each other and we just
talked about shirts and we'relike, you know what a shirt can
(38:28):
make a difference, it can spreada message, and we think it
could be fun and we literallyjust started and we decided to
take the name inspire onefitness and kind of transfer, or
change it into inspire one life, and it just it felt it felt
more fitting and it's just,essentially, it's around the
(38:49):
idea of you know, if you cantake what you've been through
like we all have a story, youdon't have to be an influencer,
you don't have to.
You don't have to have a millionfollowers or 10,000 followers
or whatever it is like.
You have a story and you havethe ability to connect with
people and the ability to helppeople.
And if you can help one person,who's to say that because you
(39:09):
helped that person, because yougave, you came alongside them
and gave them help and liftedthem up and strengthen,
strengthen, strength, then tothem that they don't go on to
help 10 people and those peopledon't go on to help 100 people,
like it's a ripple effect.
So that's that's really whatwe're doing and what we're
starting right now.
(39:29):
We're just doing a barrel, it'sjust spreading positive message
, trying to create a rippleeffect that inspires others and
just brings more awareness tojust mental health and just,
yeah, this world needs just moregood in it yeah, and I've seen
your stuff and I love it.
Speaker 1 (39:46):
You have one on right now inspire one life.
What are some of the otherthings you've been putting on
shirts?
Speaker 2 (39:52):
so we have inspire.
One life really is just thename we have.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Your life matters and summer's got a really cute one.
Speaker 2 (39:59):
Yes, your life matters and then another one is
endure with a semi colon, andthat is actually one that has
been a kind of like a personalmantra, I just for a long time,
just that, whether it's througha tough workout or and if you
break it down, the word endureitself means to remain in
existence or to suffer patiently, which sounds terrible, but a
(40:23):
lot of times it's what.
That's what we do, like we'resuffering isn't always a bad
thing.
Sometimes it gives you, I mean,you look at your story,
everything that you've beenthrough, I mean, is the reason
that you're able to do what youdo and connect with people and
help people on a deeper level.
And, like we were actuallytalking about this before, the
(40:46):
podcast is Summer and I arereading through Job right now
and I had actually never heardthat story and I don't
understand 90% of it.
Right, now, and my head hurts,but he suffered immensely and he
was faithful through it.
He wasn't only faithful andgrateful when things were good,
(41:08):
and it's one of those thingswhere, going back to the word
endure means to remain inexistence, so to essentially
stay here and to suffer inpatience or suffer patiently,
and the semicolon in mentalhealth circles means essentially
.
A semicolon is when an authorcould end a sentence with a
(41:29):
period, or they could conjointwo sentences and keep the
sentence going with a semicolon.
So essentially it means toremain in existence and this
isn't the end.
Right, we're not going to end.
Yeah, so we're, and you'll seewith.
We're about to drop some moreshirts, but you'll see that the
designs we are getting better,our skills are improving,
because this is not onlystarting a business, but we're
(41:50):
learning how to screen print.
And that is a whole anotheranimal in itself, like that's a
whole another skill.
Speaker 1 (41:56):
Wow, so you set this up in the basement?
No, it is at her parents.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
they have a pole barn and they're.
Yeah, it's been a massiveblessing because they're
allowing us to use the pole barnand build that out, and so
we're there right now.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
Okay, and you're both working on it.
Wow yeah, good for you guys.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
So we're learning that your employee diesel our
dog?
Yes, he doesn't do anything.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Doesn't do anything but he's cute.
Seems to have quite a rolethere.
Yes, so, and if you follow themon Instagram, you'll know what
I'm talking about.
So, no, and I love followingyou guys on Instagram.
It's so much better than thefitness, because I would just
feel guilty when I watch that.
You know I'm like can't watchthat anymore Cause I'm not
working out like that, but no, Ilove that.
(42:44):
So what is that?
Where you plan on selling yourmerchandise is on that platform.
Are you hoping to break intoany markets anywhere, right?
Speaker 2 (42:55):
now we're I mean especially with like this time
of year in Michigan with thesnow and stuff we're focused
more on like online and justtrying to get established with
social media online buteventually getting to like doing
events and stuff like that andjust meeting people, cause we
love like social, like face toface interactions are the best.
(43:15):
Yeah, but yeah.
Right now it's just our website.
Inspire one life, so just theword.
Inspire the number one, andthen lifecom.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (43:25):
And then you can also find it I mean it's in both of
our, in Facebook and Instagram,like the bio, the link is right
there too.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
All right, and I'll get that from you too and put it
in the notes, all your contactinformation as well.
So.
But you know you mentioned mystory of I wouldn't be doing
what I'm doing today if itweren't for that, and I am
grateful for what I went through, because I wouldn't be who I am
(43:51):
today, and I know I'm notperfect by any means.
God's not done.
He better get busy cause I'mgetting old.
But you guys got a lot moretime, but, um, or so we hope.
But you're definitely turningyour pain into purpose and I'm
sure it's not what you plan.
You know you're not in whenyou're in high school, you're
(44:14):
not like boy.
I sure hope that I get to livewith my parents, with my bride,
and set up a little business inmy bride's mom and dad's pole
bar and that's a dream.
That's a dream.
We don't think that way.
But, honestly, does it get anybetter than today?
No, no, no, it's awesome and Icommend you both.
(44:36):
And you get to work together.
Not everybody can do that.
I speak for a family businessyou know.
Anyway, I just keep praying thatGod blesses your business and
that we keep bringing awarenessto this mental health.
Your families I know both ofthem and I hope that someone
hearing this um, maybe theperson that realizes that there
(44:59):
is a way out.
So we will have all yourcontact information there as
well.
So thanks for being here.
Speaker 2 (45:05):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
Thanks for being here .
Join us next time for anotherstory of what happens when faith
meets addiction.
Welcome back to the she Surrenders podcast.
I'm your host, sherri, and oneach episode we share with you
what happens when you put downyour addictions and pick up the
promises that God has for you ina brand new life of recovery.
I have another great episodefor you today, so let's get
started.
So we're here with JaredZimmerman today, and I am so
(00:26):
excited that you're here.
It's been a long time.
I've known you more as a kid.
While you're still a kid as faras I'm concerned, in my mind
you're one of the four Zimmermanboys singing fingerprints of
God in front of church and thedream where you guys two still
are.
Speaker 2 (00:42):
But with all the matching suits and all the
matching.
Thank you, Grandma.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Yes, you could have done weddings if you would have
kept it up.
But yeah, so I reached out toJared because he recently posted
on his Instagram that he hadnine years alcohol free and I
thought that needed to berecognized and I wanted to know
more.
So I've known the Zimmermanfamily for a long time, but I
(01:11):
did not know this, Jared, so Iwanted you to share your story.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
I'd love to, and, starting Well before we jump in,
I did have a question and I wasgoing to ask you before we
started this.
But with knowing you, since Iwas a kid, we were always raised
to use Mr and Mrs, so sayingyour first name feels super
weird.
Do you prefer Sherry or?
Speaker 1 (01:37):
I feel like that's hard.
Speaker 2 (01:41):
Because it's been on my mind.
That's been the thing I've beenthe most kind of nervous about.
I'm like man.
Am I at that age yet where Ican be an adult?
Speaker 1 (01:50):
I think you are.
I think you just call me.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Sherry, it feels weird, though If you're
comfortable with it, I'm finewith it.
Speaker 1 (01:58):
I prefer to ask, though I think there's a rite of
passage that happens that youcan call me Sherry, I think
you're there, I will take it,let's do it.
If you called me anything else,I feel extremely old while
we're doing this.
So, sherry, it is.
Speaker 2 (02:15):
Perfect.
Well, thank you so much forjust giving me the opportunity
to be here.
Starting off, I guess, a littlebit of the backstory was in
March 13 of 2014,.
I actually received a phonecall and went over.
I was living in St Joe at thetime St Joseph, michigan and got
(02:38):
a phone call from a familymember just to go and help them
out at their house and just hadthis feeling like something just
didn't feel right the whole wayover there.
When I was over there, I foundout that my older brother,
justin, who was older than me by15 months, had actually taken
his life From there, and there'sa whole whole long story
(03:03):
between then and now.
But we grew up 15 months apart.
So pretty much is that older,younger brother of when one
brother does something, theother brother does that and
you're constantly competing.
And we were wrestling practicepartners.
We were the same size, sameheight, everything.
I mean.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
He took my clothes 90% of the time I never knew who
was who.
I really didn't.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Well, most people actually thought until we got to
a point where I got a littlebit taller than him, most people
thought we were twins.
We even wrestled against eachother at a few tournaments
because we were the same weightand that was awful.
But kind of going down thatroad was.
It was one of those thingswhere and I'm sure you've seen
(03:49):
this in your own children wherewhen one kid's allowed to do
this we talked about thisbriefly but when one kid can
finally watch a PG-13 movie,it's like by default, you get
that trickle down of everyoneelse.
And that's how it was withJustin and I, where he would be
(04:09):
allowed to see a certain type ofmovie than I was, because I was
a little bit younger than him.
When he started he cussed forthe first time like I'm like, oh
, it's okay if I do it.
And then it was the same withalcohol.
And we both, you know,throughout high school sports we
were both very clean, we didn'tdrink, we didn't touch it.
After we both graduated was awhole nother story and it was
(04:29):
that kind of typical path that alot of people go down is, you
know, oh, I'm out of the house,I'm allowed to drink, I'm an
adult now.
And yeah, I mean we were.
It was just innocent partying.
What we didn't realize is thatuntil after he passed away was
that he struggled with it a lotmore than we realized.
(04:51):
It wasn't just partying.
And then, kind of going back tome, following in his footsteps,
I started going down the exactsame path as him.
So, you know, after the dayafter his funeral I took off,
went back to St Joe and justthought I could just isolate
myself and work through it on myown.
You know it's hard to even likearticulate everything that
(05:14):
you're feeling, but it's a mixof like anger, like angry with
God, but at the same timeneeding him, but at the same
time turning away from him andthinking that you can do it on
your own.
And yeah, I started going downthat path for seven or eight
months where it was just I wasdrinking all the time and just
(05:36):
ruminating constantly on kind ofwhere his mind was at and what
led him to suicide, and evenlike talking about it was such a
like.
You know I'm now in that groupof like oh, my brother, you know
, died by suicide, like it wasalmost shame around that.
But then I started making thesame decisions that he was
(05:58):
making, where it was somethingthat was constantly on my mind
and I don't know if you'll haveany questions of that further.
Speaker 1 (06:05):
or I was just thinking did you ever feel like
you could figure out, like maybethat would help you figure out
where Justin's head was, youknow his why, and all that like
if you, if you were slippinginto his shoes, you know like
into his mindset, as you werekind of following?
Speaker 2 (06:23):
That's a good question.
I don't know if it was whichkind of came first, if it was me
constantly thinking about itthat started making me kind of
go into his shoes and follow him, or if me trying to step into
his shoes, then I startedthinking about it more.
I mean, like I'm not positive,but I do know that like I went
(06:46):
through this phase because himand I we were so close and we
were such good friends that whenhe did pass away it was that
that almost guilt, because wewere drinking, him and I were
drinking a lot, and like therewere times where I, even to this
day, where, like my mind willstart to question like, did I
(07:08):
miss something because I wasdrunk with him?
Did we ever have a conversation?
And I just don't remember itbecause I was at a point, you
know, I was blackout drunk, likewe were just having fun, you
know.
And I still like there's timeswhere I catch myself questioning
that and just kind of lettingthe enemy into my mind, and but
then I really it was trying tofigure out why he did it.
(07:31):
That I think led me to goingdown that path of self
destruction where I mean Iremember when I first got home
after he passed away, I wentthrough all of his drawers.
I mean it was I ended up movingback home, you know, after this
, which is, you know, furtherdown the story, but I was.
(07:52):
I would take the drawers out ofhis the room he was living in
and check under to see if hewrote anything on the drawers.
I took the mattress off the bedand was checking like the
little support beams that holdmattresses up.
I checked to see if he left anote on those.
Like you're just looking foreverywhere and when you start to
you start to look for things,you're going to see it.
(08:14):
So, like when you're lookingand ruminating on depression or
alcohol or fill in the blankwith whatever your struggle is,
you're going to see more of that.
And if that's what youconstantly dwell on, that that
starts to consume you.
So that's where I was at.
Speaker 1 (08:27):
If that answer.
I don't know if that answersyour question, it does, and I
can see how it doesn't help tolet go either.
No it keeps you very stuck andnot able to move on.
Yeah, but also how close youguys were.
It makes sense.
Speaker 2 (08:44):
Well, it's hard to let go and you don't even.
You don't know how, you're notprepared for it.
Speaker 1 (08:49):
No.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
And but yeah, so I started drinking and I wouldn't
say that I was at a point whereI was addicted to it, but I
would say that I was.
I was using it as somethingthat I almost could have an
(09:10):
excuse if something bad happenedto me, that it wasn't me making
the decision, it was thealcohol or it was a multitude of
things.
It was an escape, it was anexcuse for something bad
happening to me and I think that, kind of going back to how you
brought up the post, there was amoment where I was actually in
(09:34):
Central Michigan.
I drove up there for theweekend and I was drinking all
night long.
It was actually seven in themorning and most people were in
bed by two, three AM and I hadrealistically drank enough to
where I probably should havebeen unconscious, because I was
at a point where the last fourhours after everybody was done
(09:54):
drinking, I was staring atpictures of him and drinking
alone in a room and crying Manlytears.
But crying.
But no, I had this moment, likewe all do and I know I posted
this, but when you're drinkingsometimes you have to pee and I
got up and I went to thebathroom and I just caught my
(10:14):
own reflection and I had this,like it's so hard to explain,
but I had this moment where justthis complete clarity, like a
snap of just clarity, and I justheard this voice that said
you're next.
And I don't know if it was mydrunk self talking to myself or,
(10:35):
like me, I firmly believe itwas God.
And in that moment I just hadthis visualization of everything
that I had just lived through,of finding out about Justin's
death, driving back home, seeingmy family for the first time,
all of us crying with extendedfamily and his friends going to
his visitation, and just theline of people that were there
(10:56):
going to his funeral, and like Isaw that all again.
But it wasn't him in the casket, it was me.
And the only thing that I justhad, this moment where I was
like I can't do that to myfamily, like I was still at a
point where I didn't care if Ilived or died but, I was like I
just can't do that to them.
And from there that was kind ofa pivotal point where I started.
(11:19):
I drank two or three more timesafter that because I'm a slow
learner to ask my wife.
Speaker 1 (11:25):
Well, sometimes we have to make sure I can relate
to that.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
But yeah, after that I was.
That was kind of the moment,though If I had to say there was
a moment that led to a decision, that was the spark.
Speaker 1 (11:40):
Yeah, and I'm with you.
I believe it was God, 100%.
I always say God will never goto the bar with you.
God will never sit at the barwith you.
He will, but he will wait.
He will wait for you to comeback out, and I believe that he
probably met you in the bathroom.
Yeah, so, yeah.
(12:01):
So that happened, and nowyou're not drinking, so you've
lost the numbing effect from allthat pain.
So now, how are you dealingwith it?
Speaker 2 (12:11):
Well, I would say so it's.
We're coming up on 10 yearssince he passed away.
I think it's such a tough thingto answer.
Speaker 1 (12:23):
What mode did you go in?
We'll start gradually, so afterthat, what did you do?
Speaker 2 (12:28):
So it was a culmination of things.
It was actually one of the lasttimes I drank was at a wedding.
So we had this cousin that waskind of like that, that fun
cousin where Justin and I wouldjust we'd write raps for her and
like we'd just goof off.
I mean, and you know, she tookus to R rated movies when we
weren't supposed to go to Rrated movies and that cousin.
(12:50):
We always told her like, oh,we're going to dress up as a
dumb and dumber when you getmarried, whenever that day comes
.
And that day came and he wasn'tthere and I still went and got
the suit and I was wearing theorange suit, Actually had the
right styling and everything.
It was amazing.
But my cousin was he wore theother colored suit and I mean,
(13:15):
bless him, he was doingeverything he could to just fill
that spot and we got there andI mean it's actually sad when
you see, I've watched throughthe videos of that wedding and
my dad's one of those people whoalways has the I don't know if
you remember him from wrestlingand he always has the recorder.
Speaker 1 (13:34):
Thank goodness they got smaller over the years.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
But I watched through it and every time you see the
bar in the background I'mstanding there.
And because it was just thatfinal reminder of like he's not
here and I got so drunk thatnight that I just had a
breakdown.
(13:57):
I don't remember it.
I know that my dad heard me saya lot of swear words, I won't
repeat, but I pretty much.
It got to the point where hewas like hey, are you willing to
get help?
And I admitted that I neededhelp.
So that was kind of two stepsin.
One was not drinking, but thenI started going to therapy and
(14:19):
which isn't something thatthere's such a stigma around all
of this stuff I mean, whetherit's sobriety, whether it's
mental health, whether it'sgetting help like there's a
stigma around even asking forhelp and letting people know
you're struggling, which iscrazy.
Speaker 1 (14:33):
Right.
Speaker 2 (14:34):
Because it's one of the best things I've ever done,
and not that that therapist toldme anything that my parents or
friends couldn't have told me,but it was just somebody who was
detached from the entiresituation where, like there were
things that I was carrying thatlike I didn't feel like I could
tell my parents at the time orthat.
(14:54):
I could talk to my siblings, or,and so I would say that was
kind of the first step, butultimately is just facing it, I
mean, and just kind of facing ithead on and leaning on the
people that that can support youthrough it too.
Not trying to do it on my ownCause.
I've gone that route and I'vefallen off track and done that
(15:14):
too, and again stubborn.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
Yeah, but we do think we can handle it on our own.
And another good reason youknow to seek therapy in a
situation like that is you knowwe were talking before we
started recording.
You know that I had lost abrother, and there's also this
part of you that wants toprotect your parents from any
more hurt.
And the last thing I wanted myparents to know was that I was
(15:39):
struggling with anything.
Speaker 2 (15:41):
It wasn't alcohol at the time, but I was more worried
about how they were doing thanhow I was doing by far, because
I couldn't imagine inflictingany more hurt on them or worry,
and I'm sure you felt the sameway I did and it's actually
crazy because when we have that,that need to care for others
(16:02):
almost right we're so willing tomake sure, like you're hurting,
but you're wanting to make surethat you're not hurting
somebody else.
So you're caring for them butit's hurting you.
And the funny thing is is thatmy parent, like everybody in my
family, was doing that when it'slike for me.
I was going, I was living in StJoe for a while, but I was
still driving either up Northback home to see family.
(16:25):
Like I was checking on everyone.
I was putting on that mask oflike I'm fine, I'm smiling all
the time, inside I'm in, I'm amess, but like I'm good.
And because I wanted to showthem like that I'm okay.
At the same time, my parentsare like all they concern their
concern was was making suretheir kids were okay and they
(16:47):
were putting their own health onthe back.
So it was like we're all tryingto make sure that we're okay and
, you know, bless my, I'mincredibly blessed to have the
parents that I do Like they sawthrough it and they were so dead
set on making sure that theirkids not just myself but, you
know, my other siblings and mylittle sister, which is one of
(17:08):
my other siblings but all of uswere that we were gonna be okay
and that we weren't going to godown the same path as my brother
, because, statistically, youknow, the likelihood
dramatically increases if you'velost a sibling or a family
member to suicide.
So, yeah, I mean they werewatching.
I mean they were like hawks.
Speaker 1 (17:30):
So who's grieving really yeah?
Speaker 2 (17:33):
that's a good question.
Speaker 1 (17:34):
Yeah, everybody's concerned about each other and
trying to deal with itthemselves, so, but you were
really the only one who pickedup a substance in the beginning.
Speaker 2 (17:47):
That I know of.
Yeah, I mean-.
Speaker 1 (17:50):
Because alcohol wasn't a big thing in your
family growing up.
Speaker 2 (17:52):
No, not at all.
I mean to the point where I saw.
I don't know if I ever saw mydad drink up until the time I
was legally allowed to.
They'd have like a Mike's Hard.
Speaker 1 (18:04):
Living Right right, Something like that.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
So yeah, I'd seen that, but no, it was, I mean not
in our family, like not at all.
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Right, how old were you when you quit drinking?
Speaker 2 (18:19):
When I quit drinking.
I would have been oh man,you're making me do math that
was not a prerequisite.
Speaker 1 (18:23):
Okay, nine years ago.
Yeah, nine years ago.
Oh, so I'm gonna date myself.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
I would be what?
22 when I quit my wife'ssmiling and giving me a heads up
.
So she's like you did your yeah, but yeah, so I was 22.
I was 21 when he passed away.
Speaker 1 (18:40):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
And then 22.
I always make the joke that Idrank more before I was legally
allowed than after, but-.
Speaker 1 (18:48):
You know and I've said this before, I think I said
it to another young man thatwas on the podcast once I used
to look at you know the fewtimes I went to AA, there was
always young people on therethat had to get their slip
signed.
You know, they got a DUI orwhatever and some of them were
in real trouble and I thought tomyself the mindset I was in
(19:11):
back then.
Gosh, that really stinks.
It's you have to quit drinkingand you're only 22, whatever, at
least I got to drink till I was, you know, 40 or so Well, I was
actually older than that.
But now I look at it wholedifferent perspective and think
(19:31):
you are so lucky that you quitwhen you did.
Look how much more time youhave to be healthy and whole and
make a difference and pursue,you know, your passions and your
dreams and not have somethinglike alcohol keep you from that.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Well, and just to be alive.
Speaker 1 (19:51):
And to be alive.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
The direction I was going with.
I mean, there's no doubt in mymind that I wouldn't be here If
I had continued to go down thepath that I was going down like.
So, yeah, I completely agree,it's been one of the biggest
blessings that has ever happened.
And it also led to.
It was a not just a decision, Ithink, at that moment to want
(20:18):
to get sober, but I think it wasmore of a, a decision and a
conviction to want to live too,because I think the two were
tied so heavily together at thatpoint where me saying I was
gonna stop drinking was also mesaying, all right, I'm not gonna
give up, like I'm going to getback up, I'm gonna dust myself
(20:40):
off and I'm gonna find help.
I'm not gonna do it myself.
But because I mean, if you lookat, like if I had a chart of
just positive habits that havechanged, like that was one of
the big, it was that therapy.
And then I mean, even I look atthe kind of person I was when I
was drinking and just a fewshort months later to, I mean,
(21:01):
my wife's right for anyonelistening, my wife is sitting
right next to me, but thatversion of myself that was
drinking and partying and beingstupid, would have never been
the kind of person my now wifewould have wanted to go after or
wanted to be with, becausethat's just.
We wouldn't have been alignedin who we are, you know, with
(21:22):
our just, our habits and ourvalues and our character, and
that was another decision.
So it was like sobriety goingto therapy, like going back,
moving back home, which was thatwas an ego shot too when I'm 22
, most of my friends aregraduating college and they're
(21:42):
getting adult jobs and they'regetting salaries, and here I am
still not sure what I want to dowith my life.
But I was working and I burnedmyself out because I went right
back to work.
After his funeral, I moved backhome and you know, even that
just like.
But it was a good decisionbecause I leaned in on the
(22:04):
people that were there for meand I think, no matter what it
is that we're struggling with,like, it's okay to lean on
people.
There's seasons for everythingin life, whether it's a family
member, a friend, you know, aspouse.
You don't have to go like, youdon't have to go through the
journey alone.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
Right and in your case, your parents had had a
little time.
They were able to be strong foryou, summer.
Your wife was able to be.
It's okay to lean on.
It's.
There's times in life where wedo have to lean on others that
are stronger than us, andthere'll be times in your life
(22:43):
where you're strong andsomeone's going to lean on you,
and I just feel like that justis God's timing of how he works
things out.
And the problem is is that wecarry so much shame about that
asking for help and we getourselves in a pretty deep hole
before we're willing to ask forhelp sometimes.
(23:04):
And I often think too, if Iwould have asked for help but I
had the fierce belief that Icould fix this and I would fix
it.
And a lot of times I was like,how's that working for you?
And it's not, but for somereason I thought the next day
was going to be different, youknow.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
And even if you do fix it, it's like, well, okay, I
could go about this my own wayand what?
It takes me 10 years to figureit out.
Or lean on people who haveeither been there or they have
experience, they have differentperspectives.
It's like, okay, or I canshortcut it.
Not shortcut it like shortcutthe time and get there a lot
quicker and save myself all thepain that they have gone through
(23:47):
because they have their ownexperiences of life or whatever
it is.
Like so yeah.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
You know, get in and do the work, yeah, Do what it
takes.
You know, instead of just youknow, there's a lot of people
that when they quit drinking,that's all they do quit drinking
and expect life to changemiraculously for the better.
But there's a lot more thatgoes along with it.
(24:13):
Because I think God expects usto change, because I feel like
when I quit drinking and I thinkit's very evident with you too
God kind of said okay, great,thank goodness he stopped,
because now I can use you, let'sget.
We've got work to do.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Yeah, yeah, a lot of work to do.
Speaker 1 (24:33):
And it didn't happen overnight.
So I'll let you pick up whatyou did for a while and where
you went, and I love the storyof how you and Summer got
together that you shared with me.
You know what I'm sharing alittle bit of that.
Yeah, so Because you guys, Ididn't even know you were like
married and I knew both of youas kids.
(24:54):
I'm like wait, they're together.
For Skrull I'll tell you whatYup For Skrull.
That's right.
Speaker 2 (24:59):
Yeah, so I mean it really ties into that decision
to move back home and kind ofstart to rebuild.
It was at a time where I was Iwasn't working, I was struggling
and our parent, our mom,started scheming, as they
(25:20):
sometimes do.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Another force-growing mom.
Speaker 2 (25:27):
Yeah and no.
They set up a game night andshe was at the time recovering
from ankle surgery which wasactually a career in Indian
ankle surgery for volleyball.
She was playing for Hope andgoing through some of her own
battles and we ended up gettingtogether at this game night.
And I think the first gamenight was more of a coincidence.
(25:48):
And then our mom saw ustogether and like okay.
Speaker 1 (25:52):
Well, let's start to formulate something.
Yes.
Speaker 2 (25:56):
And yeah, I mean it was just one of those things
where I think we were bothstruggling and God just brought
two broken people together and,you know, found healing through
that too, which is funny becausegrowing up, Jonah was in my
younger brother was in her grade.
And I was in her olderbrother's grade and I was always
(26:17):
telling Jonah, I'm like bro,you got to go after that girl.
Speaker 1 (26:20):
She's going to be.
Speaker 2 (26:21):
she was athletic and not it sounds really creepy when
you say it now as an old person, like talk, but as an old
person when you're older and I'mlike, I'm like, bro, you got to
go after that girl.
She's going to be cute, she'sathletic and then and then yeah,
I'm married to her.
So then, kind of going fromthere, we I mean there's so much
(26:41):
to try and condense, but I mean, when it comes to and we were
talking about habits a littlebit earlier before we started
this, and I think this isactually a really a really
important topic, especiallywe're going into the new year A
lot of people are motivated,they're wanting to make a shift,
and we talked about just whenyou have something that you're
(27:06):
getting rid of, you always wantto replace it.
So you know, if it's like forme, I went from alcohol and I
cut that out and it was like Ihad a death grip on fitness and
nutrition and I replaced thatbad habit with a good habit and
it was.
It was good at the time, but Iwas so strict around it that it
started to limit me from livingmy life and traveling and having
(27:27):
experiences with family andfriends.
But a lot of people, whenthey're wanting to make a change
, whether it's sobriety or evenit's like just healthy habits
eating healthier or going andgetting active or whatever it
may be the change that you'rewanting to do.
So many people think that theyhave to add something.
Okay, well, I'm going to wakeup earlier and do this and then
(27:51):
do this.
And it's like they.
I don't know if you've ever hadpeople ask you like what can I
start doing?
What can I start doing?
We think we have to add more toour plate, when a lot of times,
it's actually addition bysubtraction, where it's like
okay, well, what am I doingright now?
Or it's like okay, look at yourphone and how much you use your
screen time.
Like, if you're looking at, ifyou do that, I'm warning you, if
(28:13):
you do that, you're going toget a root away, canine, because
it's going to be like oh, youuse you look at Instagram three
hours a day.
Yeah, but a lot of times, ifyou take the approach of
addition by subtraction, whereit's like okay, well, if I just
take one hour or less of screentime a day, then by default we
talked about it.
Just, you're always going tofill that void with something,
(28:33):
and that's where you can startto allow yourself to fill that
void with something healthier.
So, instead of waking up orinstead of going out to the bar
or doing something.
It's like well, maybe I go fora walk instead, like, but you're
not going to find that thinguntil you get rid of the other
thing first, versus trying tojust fit everything in at once.
Speaker 1 (28:54):
Right, because we tend to.
I think we go into directburnout and overwhelm ourselves
when I mean, if I look at theridiculous list I used to have
ready to go, that we're allgoing to help me quit drinking,
you know, around fitness dietand oh yeah, in the meantime
I'll quit drinking because allthese things will take effect.
No, they never worked, you know, because the expectations were
(29:18):
so high.
Yeah, I mean they wereridiculous and yeah, so they
never worked at all.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
No, we try to do too much.
We think that it's like I'mgoing to do this, this, this,
this, this, and it looks perfecton paper, but we haven't taken
the time to develop those habitsor what it's going to take to
actually make that happen when abetter approach is like hey,
just start with one thing justsomething simple.
Okay, if you want to wake upearlier, don't set your alarm
(29:46):
for two or three hours earlier.
Just this week, I'm going towake up 15 minutes earlier.
Next week, I'm going to set itanother five, 10, 15 minutes
earlier.
Eventually, you're going tohave that natural adaptation
where you're up two hoursearlier and you have more time,
or whatever it is.
But yeah, that's a great pointof just, we try to do so much
and we crush it for a week andthen we just fall flat on our
(30:08):
face.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
And then you feel like a huge failure and then you
got to deal with that.
So.
But I think the black and whitethinking is very typical,
especially in early sobriety,because we also have this belief
that if we can fix that, youknow, if we can let go of that,
surely we're strong enough tofix everything else, you know.
(30:30):
But I've seen the black andwhite thinking in myself and a
lot of other people graduallyjust diminish over the years.
Speaker 2 (30:37):
There's seasons for everything and there's different
phases of life too, where youknow, for somebody that like for
me at a time, that was great.
And I still like to track food,because if I don't track food I
fall off.
Like I just I love sugar but italso just messes me up, like.
But it's one of those thingswhere it's amazing how much we
(30:58):
talked about shame earlier andjust how much our society and
just our own, just our ownconversation.
There's so much shame aroundeverything Like.
There's shame around asking forhelp.
There's shame around not beingable to do it ourselves.
There's shame around even likeif you start something and you
don't get.
You know, maybe you're supposedto hit 11,000 steps and one day
(31:19):
you don't get those steps.
There's shame around where it'slike and we think so black and
white, whereas the reality isand I'm going to use diet just
because I've been a nutritioncoach and fitness and all that
but let's say you eat, you knowthree meals a day and you're
supposed to hit 2000 caloriesand a perfect day would be you
(31:40):
hitting that perfectly.
But with black and whitethinking, if you only eat, let's
say, 200 of those calories, youmess up and you have a snack.
Black and white thinking saysoh, I failed, I'm a failure.
But realistically, no, youdidn't fail the day.
You, you messed up on what afraction of a percent of the day
Like so and when you look at itrealistically, it gives
(32:02):
yourself.
You can give yourself gracethrough the process of okay,
yeah, tomorrow I can do betterIf that's my goal, but it
doesn't make me a failure.
I just failed that specificmoment.
I didn't fail the entire day.
Speaker 1 (32:14):
Yeah, but with a lot of thinking whether, and
especially while we're drinkingit was like well, I screwed up.
Might as well keep going, ohyeah.
Or the you know, having thehandful of candy that you
weren't planning on.
Well, I screwed up.
Might as well keep going, I'mstill guilty of that.
I'm not going to lie, I'm notlike I used to be, but that used
(32:37):
to be a huge problem.
Like now, I'm like well, maybeI'll keep going, I don't know,
but I don't know, but I don'tknow, peanut M&Ms.
I tell you what, oh my gosh, itjust must be a thing.
Speaker 2 (32:47):
It's so bad.
Speaker 1 (32:48):
Because they are, I swear they're like, they're like
the, they're like the healingpower for the you know, like
until the next day, when youjust have a headache.
Yeah, I don't even.
They don't even give me aheadache.
I mean, I feel like.
I feel like God made peanutM&Ms just for the person that
conquered drinking, like youknow what, and the family size,
(33:11):
like if you quit you get thefamily size.
Speaker 2 (33:13):
That's the full bag, right?
Yeah, that's $9.99 at Walgreensyou know like that's worth it.
You know my wife's laughingbecause that's like that's my
go-to.
If I'm going to have M&Ms, it'sthe peanut M&Ms.
Speaker 1 (33:24):
Yes yes, because alcohol used to cost a lot more
than that.
That's what I always say oh man, yeah you got to laugh about it
.
So I want to move into you guys.
You moved away for a little bitduring COVID, tried some
different things and you movedback for a reason to try
(33:44):
something new, and I want mylisteners to hear about that.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Yeah, so we actually lived in Missouri and then
Oklahoma, so this is our firstwinter back and it's snowing
right now as we're doing this.
Yes, but we actually, I wouldsay the reason we moved back, it
wasn't initially for thebusiness.
We knew we wanted to start abusiness, but I think it hit
(34:08):
both of us that we didn't wantto do life without our family in
it.
We moved away and I think it'sone of the best decisions we
made to move away because itgave us time to be and start our
relationship alone and justhave to lean on each other and
(34:29):
just have that, the challenge ofthat and then.
But when we move back, I alsosay that moving back was one of
the best decisions we ever madetoo, because it was our choice
to come back here and theperspective that we got of
wanting to be with our familyand wanting to just be connected
and just plant roots andactually like, want to like for
(34:52):
the first time in my life.
I've always wanted to move awayand I never knew, I never
thought I would move back toMichigan once I moved away.
But and I and just not to gooff topic but I think as a
society a lot of the strugglewith mental health and there's a
lot of things that stem fromthat.
I think alcohol is something,drugs, just isolation.
(35:16):
It's that mindset of notneeding, not having to be
connected to people that youknow, not planning roots, not,
you know, ever having a itdoesn't have to be family, but
not having your core group ofpeople in your community.
Because we've gone into a worldof everything.
You know I don't need to go tothe store, I can order it off
Amazon and have it at my door.
(35:37):
I can.
You know, I don't even have totalk to somebody if I go to the
store because I can go through aself-checkout versus actually
slowing down and having aconversation with somebody,
connecting with somebody.
So I think we realized thatthere was, even though we were
meeting people and we love thepeople that we worked with, we
love the people that weconnected with and the
relationships that we developedthere was this void in our lives
(36:02):
that we knew that wasn't goingto be filled by that, and it was
.
It was a void.
I'd say it was two things.
It was spiritually.
We weren't growing.
We were trying we're kind ofdating churches, but I wasn't
being a spiritual leader.
That she needed and thankfullyshe challenged me on that, so,
(36:22):
but also we just we weren'tgetting connected.
It was.
It was one of those things werelike, oh well, we might move
again, so what's the point inconnecting with people?
Oh, we might, we might moveagain, so why get involved with
the church?
And so coming home and justhaving that connection, but also
just wanting to, just wantingto be here and wanting to
connect with people and wantingto have a community where we can
(36:44):
engage and we and you can leanon people again and you don't
have to do it all yourself, andthen going into the next step as
we got here and it's like, okay, well, what are we gonna do?
Because we've both been insales and we're at a position
where it's like, you know, wedon't have kids yet and we both
(37:06):
have talked about starting abusiness.
We've always, you know, we'vewanted to and just to see, just
to at least say whether wesucceed or fail, to at least say
we tried and I had had thisidea actually initially after
Justin passed away.
That was my brother's name, ifI didn't mention.
Say it earlier, but for thelisteners, yeah but I had this
(37:26):
idea and it just came to me whenI was reading one night inspire
one life or inspire one fitness.
It was when I was heavy intofitness at first.
Okay, and I started going downthat path and it was actually
gaining some traction and I hadno idea and I actually just
imposter syndrome and doubt andfear and just I stopped
(37:46):
completely and I always feltagain shame.
I felt ashamed of it when peoplewould ask me about it or people
.
I saw people wearing the shirtslike there's so much shame,
because I felt like a failure.
I felt like, oh well, this is,this was a great idea, but since
I quit, I can never do it again.
And we just we talked about itand we're just sitting there and
we're talking about businessideas and whether it's fitness
(38:08):
or supplementation or you know,whatever it is sales, and it was
just everything was moneyfocused.
We're like, okay, how can wemake the quickest money?
And, you know, start so we canget a house and we can start a
family.
And and then, just one day, welooked at each other and we just
talked about shirts and we'relike, you know what a shirt can
(38:28):
make a difference, it can spreada message, and we think it
could be fun and we literallyjust started and we decided to
take the name inspire onefitness and kind of transfer, or
change it into inspire one life, and it just it felt it felt
more fitting and it's just,essentially, it's around the
(38:49):
idea of you know, if you cantake what you've been through
like we all have a story, youdon't have to be an influencer,
you don't have to.
You don't have to have a millionfollowers or 10,000 followers
or whatever it is like.
You have a story and you havethe ability to connect with
people and the ability to helppeople.
And if you can help one person,who's to say that because you
(39:09):
helped that person, because yougave, you came alongside them
and gave them help and liftedthem up and strengthen,
strengthen, strength, then tothem that they don't go on to
help 10 people and those peopledon't go on to help 100 people,
like it's a ripple effect.
So that's that's really whatwe're doing and what we're
starting right now.
(39:29):
We're just doing a barrel, it'sjust spreading positive message
, trying to create a rippleeffect that inspires others and
just brings more awareness tojust mental health and just,
yeah, this world needs just moregood in it yeah, and I've seen
your stuff and I love it.
Speaker 1 (39:46):
You have one on right now inspire one life.
What are some of the otherthings you've been putting on
shirts?
Speaker 2 (39:52):
so we have inspire.
One life really is just thename we have.
Speaker 1 (39:56):
Your life matters and summer's got a really cute one.
Speaker 2 (39:59):
Yes, your life matters and then another one is
endure with a semi colon, andthat is actually one that has
been a kind of like a personalmantra, I just for a long time,
just that, whether it's througha tough workout or and if you
break it down, the word endureitself means to remain in
existence or to suffer patiently, which sounds terrible, but a
(40:23):
lot of times it's what.
That's what we do, like we'resuffering isn't always a bad
thing.
Sometimes it gives you, I mean,you look at your story,
everything that you've beenthrough, I mean, is the reason
that you're able to do what youdo and connect with people and
help people on a deeper level.
And, like we were actuallytalking about this before, the
(40:46):
podcast is Summer and I arereading through Job right now
and I had actually never heardthat story and I don't
understand 90% of it.
Right, now, and my head hurts,but he suffered immensely and he
was faithful through it.
He wasn't only faithful andgrateful when things were good,
(41:08):
and it's one of those thingswhere, going back to the word
endure means to remain inexistence, so to essentially
stay here and to suffer inpatience or suffer patiently,
and the semicolon in mentalhealth circles means essentially
.
A semicolon is when an authorcould end a sentence with a
(41:29):
period, or they could conjointwo sentences and keep the
sentence going with a semicolon.
So essentially it means toremain in existence and this
isn't the end.
Right, we're not going to end.
Yeah, so we're, and you'll seewith.
We're about to drop some moreshirts, but you'll see that the
designs we are getting better,our skills are improving,
because this is not onlystarting a business, but we're
(41:50):
learning how to screen print.
And that is a whole anotheranimal in itself, like that's a
whole another skill.
Speaker 1 (41:56):
Wow, so you set this up in the basement?
No, it is at her parents.
Speaker 2 (42:02):
they have a pole barn and they're.
Yeah, it's been a massiveblessing because they're
allowing us to use the pole barnand build that out, and so
we're there right now.
Speaker 1 (42:12):
Okay, and you're both working on it.
Wow yeah, good for you guys.
Speaker 2 (42:18):
So we're learning that your employee diesel our
dog?
Yes, he doesn't do anything.
Speaker 1 (42:23):
Doesn't do anything but he's cute.
Seems to have quite a rolethere.
Yes, so, and if you follow themon Instagram, you'll know what
I'm talking about.
So, no, and I love followingyou guys on Instagram.
It's so much better than thefitness, because I would just
feel guilty when I watch that.
You know I'm like can't watchthat anymore Cause I'm not
working out like that, but no, Ilove that.
(42:44):
So what is that?
Where you plan on selling yourmerchandise is on that platform.
Are you hoping to break intoany markets anywhere, right?
Speaker 2 (42:55):
now we're I mean especially with like this time
of year in Michigan with thesnow and stuff we're focused
more on like online and justtrying to get established with
social media online buteventually getting to like doing
events and stuff like that andjust meeting people, cause we
love like social, like face toface interactions are the best.
(43:15):
Yeah, but yeah.
Right now it's just our website.
Inspire one life, so just theword.
Inspire the number one, andthen lifecom.
Speaker 1 (43:23):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (43:25):
And then you can also find it I mean it's in both of
our, in Facebook and Instagram,like the bio, the link is right
there too.
Speaker 1 (43:31):
All right, and I'll get that from you too and put it
in the notes, all your contactinformation as well.
So.
But you know you mentioned mystory of I wouldn't be doing
what I'm doing today if itweren't for that, and I am
grateful for what I went through, because I wouldn't be who I am
(43:51):
today, and I know I'm notperfect by any means.
God's not done.
He better get busy cause I'mgetting old.
But you guys got a lot moretime, but, um, or so we hope.
But you're definitely turningyour pain into purpose and I'm
sure it's not what you plan.
You know you're not in whenyou're in high school, you're
(44:14):
not like boy.
I sure hope that I get to livewith my parents, with my bride,
and set up a little business inmy bride's mom and dad's pole
bar and that's a dream.
That's a dream.
We don't think that way.
But, honestly, does it get anybetter than today?
No, no, no, it's awesome and Icommend you both.
(44:36):
And you get to work together.
Not everybody can do that.
I speak for a family businessyou know.
Anyway, I just keep praying thatGod blesses your business and
that we keep bringing awarenessto this mental health.
Your families I know both ofthem and I hope that someone
hearing this um, maybe theperson that realizes that there
(44:59):
is a way out.
So we will have all yourcontact information there as
well.
So thanks for being here.
Speaker 2 (45:05):
Yeah, thank you.
Speaker 1 (45:08):
Thanks for being here .
Join us next time for anotherstory of what happens when faith
meets addiction.
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