November 28, 2021 • 53 mins
IUDs. Sex during periods. Pain. Discomfort. The tampon tax and all the other costs associated with our menstruations. Kristy and Angie tackle some burning questions about the ever so enduring, unbelievably persistent, biological event we unwillingly go through - our periods. We hit up our male friends and asked them to tell us something they know about menstruation and then ask something they want to know about menstruation.
Takeaways:
- We need men to do the work to normalize periods for everyone
- Periods are expensive, and pads and tampons are just the tip of the icebergs
- Severe menstrual cramps are debilitating, physically and mentally
- Just because we experience periods on a regular (or not so regular) basis, does not dilute its severity or legitimacy
Mentions & Resources:
- IUD Expulsion: is it as scary as it sounds?
- Intrauterine Devices (IUDs)
- What is Dysmenorrhea?
- Effects of Premenstrual Symptoms on Bipolar
- Ovulation. Breastfeeding, and Being A Chinese Daughter ft. Georgie Mah
- Building Resiliency and Tearing Down Facades ft. Steven Ngo
- Social Justice with Your Asian Parents ft. Irving Chong
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Kristy Yee (00:01):
Okay, health check 1, 2, 3, 4,
Angie Yu (00:03):
Looking pretty good.
Kristy Yee (00:05):
We are going to be talking about periods and
menstruation.
This episode was I was going tosay, this episode is brought to
you by
Angie Yu (00:13):
To you by mother nature.
Kristy Yee (00:41):
Welcome back to another episode of shit.
We don't tell mom today.
We're going to be talking aboutmenstruation.
This episode was requested byone of our poop troops, Lauren,
and, and she said, I think onetaboo subject you guys should
talk about would bemenstruation.
(01:03):
Women are definitely treatedlike their bodies is disgusting,
even though ministration ishighly natural and signals that
everything is working like itshould be.
And that women is healthy.
Absolutely agree with you.
So what we decided to do was asksome of our friends,
specifically some maleidentifying friends, and we
asked them two questions.
(01:24):
And the first one, the first oneis, and the first one is, tell
me something off the top of yourhead, about menstruation without
Googling, the more candid, thebetter.
And the second question was toask us something about
menstruation.
So we're going to be sharingwhat our friends have responded
(01:46):
with their statement aboutministration, as well as what
their question is for us
Angie Yu (01:51):
yeah, exactly.
Just to emphasize, these are 10of our friends, 10 of Christie's
friends there are some mutualfriends.
We didn't ask the same persontwice, but also this is not a
very accurate representation ofmen everywhere.
Kristy Yee (02:04):
Oh, yes.
Very, very good point.
Yeah.
This is what we're going to betalking about today is not a
representation of women ingeneral, because it's just going
to be Angie and I's experiencesand is not a representation of
what men think or have thoughtsabout in general because our
sample, our sampling methods arenot very great.
(02:25):
I also asked my partner and hisresponse was.
Is no good, so much pains, likemy GI, but no instant relief
after explosion and byexplosion, he means like
diarrhea and the toilet
Angie Yu (02:40):
GI as in gastro
Kristy Yee (02:43):
intestinal.
Yes.
Gastrointestinal GI.
So like, gut problems.
And then, and then the secondquestion or his second response
to, or his response to thesecond question was why don't
all girls that don't want to bepreggers, just get an IUD.
I'm gonna answer that.
(03:03):
just from my own knowledge and Idon't know, again, not
representative of all females, Iwould say cost is a huge factor
because an IUD ain't cheap thatshit's like$400.
The second thing would be.
Because you might not besuitable to have an IUD
(03:25):
insertion or you, your bodycould reject the IUD.
So it's not even an option foryou.
Angie Yu (03:32):
Yeah.
Yep.
And that's, pretty much eithermy experience or the experience
with people I know as well.
So that's a pretty good answerto wrap that up and also IUD
painful.
It's not like it's not like Istill get, I get horrible crimes
from my IUD, but anyway,
Kristy Yee (03:47):
Hmm.
That's a different experience
Angie Yu (03:50):
as a completely different experience, my.
cramps I've actually gottenworse just because there's
something there.
so it's, it's gotten better inthe sense that it doesn't last
as long and my periods arelighter and whatever, but, my
cramps are like instead of adull pain, like I used to be,
it's now a sharp pain.
Kristy Yee (04:10):
You talk to your gynecologist about.
Angie Yu (04:12):
Yeah.
I have it's it's normal.
Well, it's not, it's not common,but it's normal.
Kristy Yee (04:18):
Hmm.
Angie Yu (04:19):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh.
And also, I get about threedays, but it's every other day
it's really annoying.
So like, I'll get it for a day.
The next day it'll be gone.
I'm like, okay, great.
And then I'll get it again theday after.
And then maybe two day goes byand then I'll have some.
Kristy Yee (04:37):
okay.
So let's talk about IUD.
The, since we're talking aboutIUD, so it's, so Angie has an
IUD.
And so do I, I have the, I havea type called marina and that's
the one that's the non copperone.
It's the five-year one.
And when I first had my IUD, Ihad a lot of troubles having it
(04:57):
being inserted.
So it took me three differenttimes to go to.
Different clinics with differentinserters, different doctors to
stick it up.
My vagina.
Angie Yu (05:13):
Uterus.
Kristy Yee (05:15):
well you, you gotta like pass through the vagina to
get to the uterus.
Angie Yu (05:19):
for those who are listening for the men listening,
like it goes in the uterus.
Kristy Yee (05:23):
So anyways, that the experience of getting the IUD
was no fun after the IUD, Idon't typically feel, I don't
feel it and I don't feel like mycramps are any worse.
So already we have polarizingexperiences with the IUD.
I actually don't really get myperiod anymore.
(05:46):
So I've saved a lot of money onpads and tampons in the last
five years, which has beenexcellent.
Angie Yu (05:54):
Do you think that has offset the cost of the IUD?
Kristy Yee (05:58):
Probably, but I haven't done the math.
your next friend is.
Angie Yu (06:03):
This is from my friend, Mike.
Oh, this is a long way.
The variety of experiences fromperson to person is incredible.
Whether that's heaviness,thickness, length, regularity,
pain, scale of cramps bracket,if any other body effects EEG,
acne.
It's not just everyone bleedinga little bit for, for a week
every month.
So that's his fact.
(06:23):
And that's a really well putit's pretty woke of him.
Kristy Yee (06:27):
Wow.
I, I really liked that he wentinto the heaviness, the
thickness, the length, theregularity, the pain scale.
Like that's pretty, prettycomprehensive.
I must say.
Angie Yu (06:36):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (06:37):
Good job, Mike.
Angie Yu (06:39):
a few questions for you.
How do you approach sex?
When menstruating, have youencountered guys who refuse to
go near you or insist on analslash BJ's?
Kristy Yee (06:52):
How do I approach it?
Oh, God, I guess it depends onwhere I'm at in the relationship
with this person.
If it's my first time, like, howdo I put this?
If we haven't had sex while Iwas already on my period, then I
(07:12):
w I would actually feel awkwardand uncomfortable.
And, but I would really want it,
Angie Yu (07:20):
oh, yes.
Kristy Yee (07:20):
So, and, and like, if it feels better, I think it
feels better,
Angie Yu (07:27):
I don't know if that's I, yeah.
I don't know why that it wouldbe the case.
Cause biologically it doesn'tmake sense, but I agree.
Kristy Yee (07:35):
I think.
Okay.
And this is the part where I'mforgetting all of my bio 12.
I think it's like the thicknessof your walls
Angie Yu (07:44):
Oh,
Kristy Yee (07:45):
that
Angie Yu (07:46):
and then, and your uterus is lower.
Kristy Yee (07:48):
And then also like hormones happening, so, and
hormones make you few things.
Angie Yu (07:56):
Oh
Kristy Yee (07:57):
how do I, how do I approach it?
I would just, I would tell themand be like, yo, so I'm on my
period.
And then, and then let, and thenit kind of gauge their response
to see their comfort level.
If it's like a hot and steamymake-out session, you know what
I mean?
And then it's, it's like leadingto sex.
(08:20):
I know I'm like flowing, then I,it wouldn't be a no, or yes, it
would just be like,
Angie Yu (08:29):
Let's
Kristy Yee (08:30):
pause.
Let's pause for make-outsession.
Let me just tell you, so I alsohave my period right now gauge
their response.
And if they're like, okay, let'sgrab a towel and I'll be like,
all right, let's do this.
Angie Yu (08:44):
Let's go Battelle.
Good.
Kristy Yee (08:46):
like my favorite line, because not only are they,
you know, if they don't care andthey just want to get it on,
they are also considerate of thebedsheets.
Angie Yu (08:58):
yes.
Kristy Yee (08:58):
And I don't know, that's just like extra hot.
Angie Yu (09:01):
The towel is very important, even if it might seem
silly.
The towel is very important forthe exact reasons that Kristi
has just said.
Kristy Yee (09:09):
So poop troops get a towel.
Angie Yu (09:13):
So the second question he had was, do you openly talk
about menstruating with otherguys in your life
Kristy Yee (09:19):
wait, hold up, hold up, hold up.
Mike also says, have you, haveyou encountered guys who refuse
to go near you or insists onanal slash BJ's instead?
I don't recall.
Angie Yu (09:32):
They would just be like, oh, okay.
And then they seem like a littlebit dejected from it, then it's
like, okay, whatever, they'renot into it, but I don't think
anybody would be like, EO gross,get away from me or insist like
you have to pleasure me adifferent way.
Like, I don't think I've been inthose situations because that
would be a pretty shittysituation to be in.
Kristy Yee (09:51):
I mean, okay.
So you know how like a memory isfake because you just make it up
every time you revisit thatmemory.
Angie Yu (09:58):
huh.
Kristy Yee (09:59):
I feel like it may have happened to me before.
Like where someone had refusedbecause I was on my period and
they may even have suggested Ido something else to continue to
pleasure them.
Instead
Angie Yu (10:16):
Did you grab a towel and whip them in the face?
Kristy Yee (10:21):
in hindsight, that's what I should have done,
Angie Yu (10:23):
I'm sorry, you went through that.
That's really
Kristy Yee (10:25):
but I, I don't actually remember if that really
happened or not.
So it, it may or may not havehappened and I can think of the
person.
Angie Yu (10:34):
Hmm.
Kristy Yee (10:35):
let's go to the next question.
Not that I'm avoiding, butthere's nothing more to say
there.
Angie Yu (10:41):
So Mike's next question is, do you openly talk
about menstruating with otherguys in your life?
If you're hesitant, why is that?
And what do you need in order tofeel comfortable talking about
it and normalizing it inconversation?
Kristy Yee (10:54):
I feel like it's not up to us to normalize it because
we do.
I think it's more like menshould normalize talking about
the females in their life.
And then going throughmenstruation and educating
themselves about menstruation.
Angie Yu (11:12):
I agree.
Kristy Yee (11:14):
So do I openly talk about it?
I think that depends.
Like if I'm on my period, I'lllet people know I'm on my
period,
Angie Yu (11:22):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (11:23):
I probably won't be like, oh, today was a heavy
flow.
I got to have to change threetimes and it got onto my pants.
Well, actually, you know, what,if it was that bad, I might just
Angie Yu (11:34):
it depends, like, it depends, like, think of it like
a bowel movement.
Does it warrant a story?
Like, you know, if it was justlike a normal thing, you're not
going to update your friends,but it was just so bad or so
good.
You might say to your friend,Hey, today was a 10 out of 10.
Kristy Yee (11:51):
yes, that is correct.
Treat menstruation like bowelmovements.
Oh my God.
Is that our takeaway from today?
My goodness.
Angie Yu (12:00):
terms of talking about
Kristy Yee (12:01):
do I hesitate?
Not, no, not anymore.
I think I would have hesitatedwhen I was younger because it
was, something you just don'ttalk about.
Right.
It's another taboo subject insociety.
So I think, you know, in highschool or even university, I
might not talk about it as much.
(12:22):
It would be more like, do youhave a tampon?
I can borrow, you know, likepulling people to the side and
whispering to them like, yo, canyou check my pants?
And you would always just dothat with a fellow female
friend.
Angie Yu (12:35):
Yes.
Kristy Yee (12:36):
You know, I still might not ask a guy friend to
check my pants.
I don't know.
Now this question's making me
Angie Yu (12:42):
Yeah, I don't think I would.
ask a guy friend to check mypants either yeah, because like
you said, like, I don't knowwhat their comfort level is.
And I agree with Kristy ahundred percent about what you
said about how it's up to men tonormalize it and not us to
normalize it because we'reobviously comfortable talking
about it with people who arecomfortable with it, AKA other
(13:03):
women, but we'll never know if aman is comfortable with it or
not.
And I don't know what a solutionthat would be like.
I don't think all the men shouldgo up to their female friends,
be like, Hey, is your flow heretoday?
Hey, what is your next period?
I want to like normalize it withyou.
so I don't know.
I don't know.
I think it also depends on likesociety too.
(13:24):
Like Tom on commercials used tohave like that blue liquid
Kristy Yee (13:27):
Yeah.
Yeah, it fucking looks like dishsoap.
Angie Yu (13:30):
I'm like whose kind of alien is objecting, blue period
fluid out of their vagina.
like I think it was like, thisis avatar period while I, while,
you know, like, I think it wasonly recently or something like
maybe even last year that theystarted changing it to red.
I don't know.
(13:51):
I don't watch commercialsanymore.
Kristy Yee (13:52):
I didn't even notice that I'm, I'm glad that there's
some form of societal shifthappening, that they are
updating the color of the bloodrepresentation in commercials.
I, we started this episodesaying like, we're not going to
be uncomfortable.
We're going to be supercomfortable because we have our
(14:13):
periods.
But now I feel a little bituncomfortable because I'm
thinking like, why, what, why doI need to base my comfort level
about my period on anotherperson's comfort level?
is that just me beingconsiderate of another person's
Angie Yu (14:33):
I would say it's being more considerate because you
can't automatically assume thateveryone's comfortable talking
about bodily fluid.
Like ministration itself shouldnot be taboo, but it's still a
body fluid.
And I'm not just going to goaround talking about my saliva,
my snot and my farts with,
Kristy Yee (14:50):
Okay.
No, I liked that.
I liked that.
We typically don't talk abouteach of those bodily fluids, but
that's what this podcast is allabout.
Why are this shit wascomfortable?
Angie Yu (15:03):
Well, I don't know if it's uncovered, like for me, and
like, I'm not going to talk to astranger about it because I
don't think they would care.
And then I, with my friends,again, I'm not going to talk to
them about it, unless I thinkit's a funny story, but I, but I
will say that like between mypartner and I I'm pretty open
with that stuff.
Kristy Yee (15:22):
yeah, me too.
But I just, I just feel like itshould go beyond our partners.
You know what I'm saying?
Angie Yu (15:28):
Yeah.
Also I'll talk about poops withmy close friends and periods
with my close friends.
Kristy Yee (15:34):
You bet.
How many of those people aremen?
Final question from Mike.
Just how expensive is it whenyou take into account pads,
tampons cups, period, underwear,et cetera, any suggestions on
how to make products moreaffordable and available for
everyone who needs.
Angie Yu (15:53):
Mike has seen a few roadside boxes in Vancouver,
stocked with free products forpeople who might need them.
That's actually a really goodquestion.
I guess I'm lucky I've neverhad, I've never had to think
about like, oh my God, I can'tafford this because I gotta go
buy pads and tampons.
I think the people who are mostvulnerable would see this as
(16:15):
like a really limiting issue.
Like if they don't have enoughpads or tampons that maybe they
can't leave the house.
Kristy Yee (16:22):
Like just how expensive?
I don't know, because I didn'tdo the math, but a box of
tampons?
How much has that like sevenbucks for a thing of 30?
Angie Yu (16:30):
I think it's 10 99 for a thing of 36.
Kristy Yee (16:33):
okay?
And a fucking gruesome math, soit's okay.
Love this shit.
There's like PST and just to addsome cracks was going to be like
1231.
Okay.
So, divided by 36.
So it's about like 34 cents pertampon.
(16:56):
Okay.
So now how many tampons wouldyou go through per month?
Would you say?
Angie Yu (17:00):
before I had my IUD, I think this should be based on
Kristy Yee (17:03):
Yeah.
Based on pre IUD.
Yes.
Yes.
Angie Yu (17:05):
Ooh.
On my heaviest days, I wouldprobably go through like five or
six and then lighter days Iwould still go through like
three or four, but it'd be thelight version.
Cause you don't want to wear,the wrong tampon size for your
flow.
Cause you can get toxic shocksyndrome.
Kristy Yee (17:21):
So just get, just give me a number
Angie Yu (17:24):
Okay.
Let's just
Kristy Yee (17:25):
How many?
Angie Yu (17:26):
20 a month
Kristy Yee (17:27):
20 per period.
Okay.
You and I have very differentperiod routines.
So for me, I definitely.
Struggle every time I'm in thetampon and period, period,
tampons and pads aisle in thegrocery, in the grocery store or
in the pharmacy, because theyare really fucking expensive.
(17:47):
And I will typically choose thecheapest version.
And I, I have in the past, likeration my use of pads.
So I will have one pad a day andthen I will line it with toilet
paper.
So then I just change out thetoilet paper.
And then the pad is just like asextra protection, but really
(18:11):
it's toilet paper.
That's doing all of theabsorption tampons.
I only use one a day.
And I don't switch between lightor non light.
And this is probably like not, Idon't take this as advice.
I'm just saying what I had done.
tampons are more expensive thanpads.
So I would only use tampons ifit was a convenient thing to do,
(18:32):
like if I was playing a sportthat day, and would be better to
use the tampon for example.
Angie Yu (18:37):
so while you were talking, I was listening Dory.
I also Googled like how much doCanadian women use spend on
tampon actually, according toestimates by the Huffington
post, the average woman usesabout five liners and 20 tampons
per cycle.
So I was
Kristy Yee (18:54):
Holy shit.
Angie Yu (18:56):
on par.
Kristy Yee (18:57):
I am definitely.
Below average.
Angie Yu (19:00):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (19:01):
I've, I've never purchased liners.
The only time I've ever usedliners are donations from
friends.
So I am the fucking recipient ofdonations.
So people will give me their,leftover tampons or pads or
whatever, because like perhapsthey got an IUD and then they
stopped flowing and they haveextra stock.
So they'll, they'll give it tome because I am, I am poor.
Angie Yu (19:25):
You're frugal.
Kristy Yee (19:26):
I am frugal because I am frugal and it's, you know,
it's gonna need to be usedanyways.
Right.
Okay.
So, next person
Angie Yu (19:32):
Oh, wait.
No, don't forget about all theunderwear you throw away when
you leak.
Kristy Yee (19:37):
Oh, I don't throw them away.
Angie Yu (19:38):
I've also thrown away jeans because I just, no matter
how many times I wash it, itcould not come out.
Kristy Yee (19:43):
Ah,
Angie Yu (19:43):
Yeah.
So jeans, underwear, and then Iended up buying some of those,
some of those leak-proofunderwear and they're expensive.
They're like almost$50 a pair,but then
Kristy Yee (19:53):
Holy fuck.
Angie Yu (19:55):
But then they'll save my$100 jeans.
Kristy Yee (19:57):
Yeah, we live
Angie Yu (19:58):
Okay.
Kristy Yee (20:01):
So the next person we have is Tom and Tom says pads
have stickies wings anddifferent thicknesses.
It happens about once a month.
It's painful and messy andlimited activities is the
discharge of lining of anunfertilized egg, not incorrect,
Tom, So his question is mybiggest confusion are about
(20:23):
ovulation timing that I wasreally surprised.
I'm like, okay.
Angie Yu (20:28):
Yeah, that's it?
Yeah.
I mean, that's part of thecycle, I don't think about it.
And, I don't even know what thatwell, myself, I just know that
observation comes first.
And then after a while, likewhat he said that I was like,
well, my time is up here by, andthen period comes.
Kristy Yee (20:48):
I was going to attempt to explain it, but then
I don't want to use theincorrect terminologies, but
yes, obviously comes first.
Now the fact that Angie and Idon't think about the ovulation
cycle does not indicate howunimportant it is because for
people who are trying to getpregnant, that is fucking gold.
Okay.
To no more listen to thatepisode that we had with Georgie
(21:09):
ma what episode is that?
Angie Yu (21:11):
I was a 14.
Kristy Yee (21:13):
14, listen to episode 14, we'll link in the
show notes.
And that one is amazing becauseGeorgia talks all about how she
times her oblation and there waswhat was it like sticks to she
had,
Angie Yu (21:28):
Yes.
Those things where you pee on itto see if you're ovulating, I
like how you remember stuff likethat, but then I remember
exactly which episode is.
Kristy Yee (21:36):
see, we compliment each other.
Angie Yu (21:37):
exactly.
Okay.
Next question.
So my friend said that one ofhis wife's friends has a health
condition where, where they haveperiods for like months at a
time.
Sounds scary.
That does sound scary.
I think right now it soundsscary to me because I don't know
what it is.
Kristy Yee (21:55):
correct.
I once had my period for, Ithink, two and a half months
nonstop.
Angie Yu (22:01):
Whoa.
Kristy Yee (22:03):
Yeah,
Angie Yu (22:05):
And what, what happened?
Like did you go to the doctor?
Kristy Yee (22:07):
It was an issue with my IUD.
It was basically coming out ofmy body.
So when you first get an IUDwhere we're talking about, this
is a IUD episode, everyone,typically when you first get
your IUD in the first sixmonths, they like to monitor it
to make sure that it's still inplace and it's not moving
around.
And once it's been in there forsix months, then you're, you're
(22:29):
pretty good to go.
So after you get your IUD, youget a checkup in six months and
they're like, yep, you're goodto go.
And then you'd kind of just,it's like set it and forget it.
My IUD, the, or the first IUDthat I had after about a year
and a half, it started to movearound and then my body wanted
to get rid of it.
And so it was treating it liketrying to shed a lining.
(22:53):
So it just kept having theperiod nonstop because it was
literally, my body was trying toget rid of this foreign.
Angie Yu (23:03):
oh, I
Kristy Yee (23:04):
So I just kept having my period for like two
and a half straight months untilI finally went to the gyno.
I'm like, yo, so it's been likesometime, and then they just
take it out.
this is super rare.
So anybody who's listening andthey're freaking out about
getting an IUD, this is super,super rare.
It's one of those like 0.3%chances.
(23:25):
And I was the 0.3.
So I already, I already took the0.3, so you're good to go.
Angie Yu (23:32):
I said, what the heck, like earlier, when we first
started talking about IUD, youmade your sound like it was such
a smooth process and now you'relike, bam, just kidding.
I had, I bled for two and a halfmonths cause
Kristy Yee (23:42):
I also said, I also said I needed three people to
like insert it in.
Angie Yu (23:46):
Oh, right, right, right, right.
You need a three inserters.
Kristy Yee (23:49):
Yeah, well, not at the same time.
Angie Yu (23:58):
I mean it's okay.
Kristy Yee (24:02):
I mean, I think like the, that condition does sound
pretty extreme and pretty scaryto have.
So this is not a medicalpodcast, so we're not going to
go into that, but that justsounds no funds at all.
And I hope that all is well.
My friend and something that heknows about menstruation is you
(24:26):
can take continuouscontraceptives to skip your
period and you can do thislongterm spoiler alert he's in
healthcare.
correct.
Yes.
Correct?
they may change your periodcycles or.
My actually stabilize it, whichis what pills had done for me.
Angie Yu (24:46):
One of my friends he asked, so he said there is blood
and women have different flows.
That was his statement.
Yes.
A very, very straightforward.
And his question is, is itcommon for most women to still
have sex while on their period?
Kristy Yee (25:01):
Well, I don't know if it's common and I can't speak
for most women, but I do it.
Angie Yu (25:07):
yeah.
Kristy Yee (25:09):
And do you do it and towels always, always offer to
bring a
Angie Yu (25:19):
I only do it when it's lighter though.
Not when it's heavy,
Kristy Yee (25:22):
Um, is, is it because of the discomfort or is
it because of, okay.
Is it because of the physicaldiscomfort caused by cramping or
is it caused by the mentaldiscomfort of knowing you are
heavy flowing?
Angie Yu (25:35):
the mental discomfort.
Kristy Yee (25:39):
Y,
Angie Yu (25:41):
I also just don't like the feeling, if it's really
heavy, it's like two lubricatedwas that TMI.
Kristy Yee (25:50):
I don't think there's such thing as TMI on
this podcast.
Angie Yu (25:54):
It's just like, I don't know.
It's just like, if there's toomuch, it's just, I don't, it
doesn't feel great.
Kristy Yee (25:59):
like, it's too slippery, like a fucking slip
and slide.
Just like too much slurp slurp.
Angie Yu (26:04):
Yeah.
Not that I have actually doneit, but I feel like it would
just be too.
Yeah.
Slip aside,
Kristy Yee (26:10):
Hm.
Maybe that's why I prefer itbecause I naturally am on the
drier side so that when I am onmy period, it's like, I need
that extra lubricant, you know?
The next person G L says fortheir statement, periods may
affect women's mood andtemperament negatively.
(26:31):
What do you think about that?
Angie Yu (26:34):
Yes for me.
Kristy Yee (26:36):
Yeah, I say it's a pretty blanketed statement.
I mean
Angie Yu (26:38):
it is pretty blanketed.
Kristy Yee (26:40):
And then their question is how do you cope with
menstruation slash periods?
Angie Yu (26:46):
oh, so I used to have this fuzzy water bottle I would
fill it up with hot water and Idon't know, it just makes it
like a little bit nicer ratherthan sitting there with like a
rubber thing on my, on my lowerabdomen.
I had to use it all the time onmy lower abdomen and all my
lower back.
Kristy Yee (27:03):
I definitely agree with having hot things.
I also say hot beverages arehelpful.
And to that I purposely avoidcold beverages.
That's definitely wisdom passedon from my mother that
surprisingly works for me.
(27:24):
And so I do find that when Iavoid cold beverages, my cramps
are way better and having hotbeverages are actually soothing
and they are.
Angie Yu (27:36):
Yeah.
And it's not something on theless physical side is I always
give my self the day off.
When I have a reallybackgrounds, they usually
happens like the first day of myperiod.
and I'm just like in the worstmood.
And I don't think that's why Ithink at that point, it's not
even a hormonal cause thehormonal mood thing usually
comes like the week before forme on that day where like I have
(27:59):
bad cramps and I just feel like,shit, I feel bloated.
I just give myself a day off.
Of course I know that's not aluxury that everybody can have.
And sometimes I can't take thatday off, but if I can, I will
and to add to Mike's earlierquestion, one thing to add to
that list of causes likepainkillers,
Kristy Yee (28:18):
Yes.
Angie Yu (28:19):
And just, you know, taking a day off, some women
might lose their wages becausethey needed a day off or time
off to rest.
So actually, you know, the costof periods is way more than just
tampons.
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (28:33):
correct?
Yes.
Angie Yu (28:34):
this next question is from Steve.
you guys might remember Stevefrom episode 28
Kristy Yee (28:39):
where we talk about resiliency as Steve shared his
stories, when he moved over toVietnam and then had a major low
and he shared that story withus.
So check.
We will link it in the shownotes.
So let's, let's hear what Stevehas to say.
(30:12):
So I do want to say it doesn'thappen always in high school,
because my happened inelementary school.
When did you first get your, ah,
Angie Yu (30:21):
Yeah.
I got mine when I was 11,
Kristy Yee (30:23):
I don't know what grade that is.
I go by grades.
Angie Yu (30:24):
grade I remember.
The first time I got, it wasactually when I went to camp
with elementary school, we wentonto this like partially
subsidized trip, which waspretty cool.
We went camping.
We were asked if we wanted to goon the speedboat and I put my
hand up and then I just rememberit being really cold on the
water, but then it felt reallywarm where my crush was.
(30:47):
And I'm like, this is weird.
Cause I was really fucking coldand wet, but I felt like warm
liquid.
And I'm like that can't be mypee.
I know I'm not peeing.
and then of course, like afterwe got back to the campus, I
went to the bathroom and I waslike, oh, and I don't remember
what I did, but I must haveasked the teacher about it
Kristy Yee (31:06):
you know, that's something we don't talk about
enough of because yeah.
People know it's blood.
Okay.
But blood comes from the bodyand it is warm.
And so when it just leaks out ofyour body and into your
underwear, it doesn't just like,you know, trickle down your
thighs.
It stays in there.
It's like kind of trapped inthere.
Angie Yu (31:28):
so you know what, Steve don't feel bad that you
thought it was gross at first,because I also thought it was
gross at first,
Kristy Yee (31:33):
I don't remember the sensation of my first time, but
I do remember that it was onFebruary 14th.
So I was in grade seven and Idon't remember how I discovered
it, but for sure, I went to ateacher and freaked out and they
called my mom and my mom came toschool and this is a big deal
(31:55):
because I live with my dad.
My dad has full custody of me.
My teacher at the time was alsoreally helpful.
And they like slipped me a padin the washroom and taught me
how to use it.
But yeah, I must say kudos toall the elementary school and
high school teachers who havebeen there for us during this
(32:16):
time.
Angie Yu (32:17):
Yeah,
Kristy Yee (32:18):
We don't appreciate them enough for that.
Angie Yu (32:20):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (32:21):
Okay.
So then our next friend who alsoshared with us, his name was
also Steve.
So Steve, number two there arefact to share is there's this
awful thing called dysmenorrhea?
I think it's caused byoverzealous.
(32:41):
I think it's caused byoverzealous uterine muscles,
trying to mold exquisite pain,apparently hot compress and
orgasms help with pain.
Very good, Steve,
Angie Yu (32:54):
my God.
Like that's what I have.
I have dysmenorrhea
Kristy Yee (32:58):
and you also have hot compresses and orgasms to
help with your pain.
It is a proven treatment method.
Everyone
Angie Yu (33:09):
yes, they go, well, I'm very impressed that he knows
what dysmenorrhea is.
Cause a lot of women don't knowwhat dysmenorrhea is.
So I know normally say, oh, Ihave dysmenorrhea.
And cause it sounds likediarrhea.
Not that there's anything wrongwith diarrhea, but you know,
just
Kristy Yee (33:23):
No.
I know, but like, so then whatdo people, people will just
think that you said diarrhea.
Angie Yu (33:29):
Well, they'll just be like, oh, what's dysmenorrhea.
And then I have to go intoexplaining it.
So I usually just say, oh, Ihave really bad cramps.
And then there's no need toexplain.
Yeah, well, yeah.
Dysmenorrhea is just like, it'sexactly what Steve said.
And, yeah, it's painful.
I remember back in high school,there was one time where I
nearly passed out.
Kristy Yee (33:44):
oh my God.
Angie Yu (33:45):
I was, basically like on the table, like with my head
buried in my arms, this wasduring like an English class and
I looked up and my teacher waslike, oh my God is everything
okay.
And I was like, like, how thehell does he know?
Right.
Cause this was during like, 20minute reading hour reading, 20
(34:09):
minutes of reading.
Do you remember the.
Kristy Yee (34:12):
I just realized what was wrong with that sentence.
Angie Yu (34:16):
Do you not remember what we had silent reading.
We had mandatory, reading
Kristy Yee (34:20):
I mean, I forgot all about it until you just
mentioned it, but yes, I
Angie Yu (34:24):
It really unlocked a memory.
during silent reading, which is20 minutes before lunchtime, I
was just collapsed on the tableand people do that all the time.
Like people would just wouldjust nap instead of reading.
So when I looked up and he saidthat I was really surprised
because like, how would he knowI was in so much pain?
Apparently he said, my face waswhite as a ghost.
And then I went to the nurse'soffice and I was there for like
(34:44):
the next three hours, basically.
Kristy Yee (34:45):
Holy shit.
Angie Yu (34:46):
Yeah, there was lots.
I actually spent a lot of timein the nurses office in high
school when I was on my period,because I couldn't even sit up
straight in class.
Kristy Yee (34:57):
That's really debilitating.
And like, I don't think so.
Not everybody has this, but Ithink when people do have it,
it's, it's really tough becausea lot of people don't understand
and they don't really have thefull empathy of like, oh, this
is not just a period.
This is actually a healthcondition.
(35:18):
Like something extra is going onon top of my period.
And it really affects yourability to participate.
Do work and study and et cetera,et cetera.
So
Angie Yu (35:31):
Yeah.
And that could be the reason whymy IUD is still giving me a lot
of, a lot of pain.
but it has definitely reducedthe frequency and the length of
my, of my cramps, because that'swhat the hormones.
Kristy Yee (35:45):
so Steve's question is do people who've been
straight know when hormones aremessing up their mood.
So do you know, and when yourhormones are like going haywire,
Angie Yu (35:57):
I do now, because now I'm on medication for bipolar.
So my moods are more stabilizedanyway, I didn't use to.
And I used to be like, oh,that's a myth because my mood
changes all the time, but now Iactually notice it.
so all of a sudden I'll be a bitmore moody than usual.
And by moody, I don't just meanlike angry by moody.
(36:17):
As in like my moods change veryrapidly, like go from happy to
sad really quickly, which iskind of like what bipolar is
anyway.
And I'll be like, why am Ifeeling like this?
Oh wait, hold on.
I'm getting my period next week.
Kristy Yee (36:31):
would you ever get confused between like you're
bipolar acting up versus, oh, myperiod's coming.
Angie Yu (36:38):
Oh, yeah.
All the time.
I still don't know if that's thecase or not.
I just have to be like, well,I'm moody and what can I do?
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (36:45):
complicated, especially because like you're
still new to having medicationto help stabilize.
I'm glad that that in itself,because of the stabilization,
it's making things a little bitmore noticeable for you, but it
is it's tough.
Right?
And sometimes not sometimes Ithink all the time, you just
have to really pay attention toyourself and just learn what it
(37:07):
is about your body.
So for me, I feel like I did notfully understand, especially at
the beginning.
I think now that we're in ourthirties, we have experienced,
we have experienced thesensation of having a period a
little bit more now.
(37:28):
So we are a little bit more intuned with our body.
it's not always accurate.
I can sometimes tell when it'scoming or not.
And for me, because my peers areirregular and they've always
been irregular even before theIUD and all of that.
I've always had irregularperiods.
So I can never tell if I ambeing moody because my periods
(37:50):
coming.
Cause I can't just go and checkthe calendar and be like, oh
yeah, my peer should come nextweek.
So yeah, this explains itbecause I don't have a fucking
regular calendar nowadays.
I feel like I can sometimes tellboth physically and emotionally,
but some days I'm just wrong.
Like I'm like, oh, I think I canfeel, I feel a little bit more
(38:12):
irritable in the last few daysor I feel a little bit more
moody in the last few days.
I think maybe my peers comingup.
So I'll typically have thisconversation with my partner.
Right.
I'll be like, yeah, I'm feelingnot so great.
I think my periods coming and.
I
Angie Yu (38:28):
yeah.
And like, after going throughtherapy and learning how to
manage my emotions and just likelearning all about managing
bipolar for me at the end of theday, like even knowing why I'm
moving, doesn't actually helpthat much.
It helps definitely.
But it doesn't help as like,it's not like it'll go away just
because, you know, like, I, Ican't just act out because I'm
(38:52):
getting my period.
I tried to, you know, not makeit more difficult to other
people.
So I just tried to manage mymood.
Kristy Yee (38:58):
having your period is not an excuse to be an ass.
Angie Yu (39:01):
Yeah, exactly.
Kristy Yee (39:02):
And I also do want to say, I mean, again, I can't
speak for everybody, but I feellike the stereotype of being
very moody and, you know,hormones going everywhere while
yes, that is true.
And so many things are happeningto our body.
It's pretty subtle.
Sometimes it's not like all of asudden you're just some nice
(39:23):
dandy person.
And then, then you become amonster.
The next second, at least Ihaven't experienced such a
drastic shift in mood andbehavior.
It's pretty subtle.
So you may or may not notice.
And because first person, youknow, you're like the last
person to notice anything aboutyourself.
(39:43):
Right.
Everybody else kind of noticethings before you ever notice
things.
So you, you may feel like, oh,last few days, I'm like, yeah, a
little bit more irritable, alittle bit more sleepy.
Maybe I'm feeling I feel whenmy.
I was going to say stomach, butthat's not correct.
I can sometimes physically feelit, but again, sometimes I'm
(40:07):
wrong and my period doesn'tcome.
So basically what I'm saying isthe stereotype of PMs saying,
and being, I don't know, angryor craving foods while that does
happen.
It is more subtle than societytells it to be.
Angie Yu (40:25):
yes.
Well said
Kristy Yee (40:27):
Was it though?
Was it So the next person thatwe have is an anonymous person
and their statement is crampshurt like a bitch.
Angie Yu (40:43):
Not always.
Kristy Yee (40:44):
And that's it.
Yeah, not always, but.
There are no pancakes.
Like it's, it's not like it's afun time.
Like I would much rather nothave a cramp, but it doesn't
it's, it's not always like keelover fetal position.
(41:09):
Can't breathe hot compressionnow gonna die type of scenario.
Angie Yu (41:16):
yes,
Kristy Yee (41:19):
Your enthusiasm in this episode is riveting,
Angie Yu (41:22):
no, no.
You know why?
Because some of the questionsare getting repetitive, like,
oh, pain.
It's a, it seems like a lot ofthe questions or statements are
about the pain of menstruation.
So this is from my friend,Andrew, and this is what he
says.
I heard menstruation isbasically like this.
Literally every woman on theplanet has a body that prepares
(41:42):
them to have a baby every singlemonth.
And that body literally preparesthe perfect environment to
literally destroy the entireenvironment and rebuild that
shit all over again the nextmonth.
Kristy Yee (41:54):
I'm glad this person has an appreciation of what the
female body can do.
Angie Yu (41:59):
Yeah, it's pretty dope-ass
Kristy Yee (42:02):
What's the.
Angie Yu (42:04):
I'd be curious about certain rituals based on when
and where women are at withtheir menstruation cycle.
For instance, have girls timedesk so that they are more
creative or more energetic ormore tired on certain days of
their cycle.
And therefore do certainactivities during that time.
For instance, if day 12, thecycle, they usually notice
they're tired, then they savetheir favorite Netflix show for
(42:26):
that
Kristy Yee (42:27):
oh my goodness.
Okay.
Okay.
People cannot see my facialexpressions as you're listening
to this episode right now, butevery single point that Angie
had just read, I made adifferent face and each face was
less and less impressive becauseholy shit, does this person
(42:47):
think that we have that muchcontrol and like, I, okay.
I'm going to answer for me.
No.
Angie Yu (42:58):
the answer for me.
Yes.
I don't think he means, I thinkhis question, he means a more,
like, do you plan around yourcycle,
Kristy Yee (43:07):
Well, I cannot because my cycles unpredictable,
Angie Yu (43:10):
right?
Oh yeah.
Right, right.
That's true.
Kristy Yee (43:12):
I do plan vacations.
Like I try to plan vacations preIUD days.
I try to find some, like, try tohave a cycle, when I was on
birth control pills, that wouldbe way more predictable because
I can physically see it.
Right.
So having birth control pillsreally stabilized, and made my
(43:35):
period come a lot moreregularly.
Okay.
So, my friend Sam, his questionis, do girls ever blame their
period for their mood or is itjust an offensive to bring up no
matter what gender you are,period.
So I'm not sure what that latterpart means, but earlier I had
said having your period is notan excuse to be an asshole.
(43:56):
So I do feel like maybe somefolks would use their period as
some sort of an excuse to not bekind.
And I feel like that just paintswomen in general, with a
negative brush
Angie Yu (44:12):
I don't know if it's offensive, I guess the offensive
part.
Isn't the fact that you'rerelating it to your period
because yes.
You know what it does affectmood.
If I'm bloated and I have soreback and yeah, it's gonna affect
my mood, but I think it'soffensive if like, your
girlfriend, your friend, yourcoworker actually has something
legitimate to be upset about andyour responses, are you on your
(44:33):
period then?
That is very offensive becauseyou one you're gaslighting them.
You're trying to make them intothinking that they're crazy
because they have absolutelynothing to be upset about.
And then you blame it on their.
Body.
So I think in that case, it isincredibly offensive.
but yeah, again, I think it justlike bringing it up is depends
(44:54):
on the situation.
Kristy Yee (44:57):
yup.
Agree.
Okay.
So then, we're almost close tothe end next.
We have David and David's.
Periods are a week long and theyrequire chocolate she's POS and
normally something deep fry toappease the demon that is
ravaging, the poor woman.
Angie Yu (45:16):
Oh my, my,
Kristy Yee (45:20):
How is this accurate?
Angie Yu (45:22):
I don't know whether I should laugh or.
Like what you said earlier, likeit kind of is just the
stereotype.
Kristy Yee (45:29):
What I actually really like about this one is
that it's not, it's notstereotyping the woman who is
going through it's stereotypingthe situation, which.
Oh, it makes me feel a lotbetter about, because what makes
me feel not good about the wholestereotyping situation is when
you're just pointing fingers.
And then you're, you're saying,you know, like you're
gaslighting, like, oh, oh, she'sjust on her period.
(45:52):
Oh, it's just a PMs thing.
You know what I mean?
Like kind of blaming the personand saying, like seeing the
person sucks.
Whereas in this situation, Davidis like, oh, like this poor
woman, this thing is happeningto them.
Angie Yu (46:06):
That's true.
Poor.
Poor us.
Please buy me.
Lots of chocolate and cheesepuffs.
I so his question is why doeseverything I do bother you?
Poor, poor
Kristy Yee (46:18):
a sweet guy.
Angie Yu (46:20):
Is it because of the pain?
What can I do to dull said pain,cranberry pills?
Kristy Yee (46:26):
I'm just going to like, totally make assumptions
here, but I feel like poorDavid, it sounds like you have
been taking advantage of, Idon't know, does everything Nick
does bother you at the time ofyour month?
Angie Yu (46:40):
No, because everything he does bothers me all the time.
Kristy Yee (46:43):
Oh my God.
Angie Yu (46:44):
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
I love him very much.
no, I don't think so.
No.
No, I don't think so.
I don't think it's specificallyduring my period.
Kristy Yee (46:52):
We mentioned moods earlier, irritability, et
cetera, but I, I wouldn'tspecifically target it at a
person.
I'd be irritable.
Everything.
Like if my fucking Chromecast istaking 30 seconds longer to
connect.
Yeah.
I'm going to fucking flip shit.
Angie Yu (47:08):
that's true.
We're not irritable at you.
We're irritable next to you.
Kristy Yee (47:13):
it's just like, exactly.
We're just irritable in generaland this is only if it gets to
that point even.
Right.
So I'm going to say no, David.
It is, it's not you I know rightbefore David okay.
So our last one for today comesfrom one of our favorite people.
Irving Irving hat, Irving joinedus on our podcast back in
(47:38):
episode 22, where we talkedabout social justice and how to
talk about it with your parents.
So check that out again, linkingthe descriptions.
So Irving statement is a reallylong one.
So Irving says, I know I learneda lot about the cycle of
hormones and such in bio 12, butI don't remember anything.
(48:02):
What I do know is that periodssuck.
And Ken slash do heard a lotthat menstrual products are
highly sought after donationitems.
Ooh, correct.
That menstrual products aren'tcovered by healthcare.
Correct.
Also companies should offerpeople.
Who've been straight paid timeoff.
And before anyone argues withthis, if execs can give
(48:23):
themselves pay raises andbonuses during a fucking
pandemic, they can take care oftheir workers if they actually
cared about anything else.
But exploitations, this is allto say.
A lot of taboo and stigmacreated around periods and
administration is a thinginvented by the patriarchy to
solidify its own powers.
Angie Yu (48:41):
Yes.
Kristy Yee (48:42):
insert some like applauses pauses here, please.
Insert applause.
Yes.
The cost of menstrual products.
We had mentioned that throughoutthis episode, the cost of birth
controls and contraceptions andUDS, the cost of our clothing
that gets ruined the cost ofmedication to manage our pain,
the costs due to time loss atwork and productivity.
(49:07):
And then the cost of justfucking joy.
Because if you have your periodon your vacation and you can go
fucking swimming or scuba divingwith all your friends, okay.
That is just no funds.
Okay.
Is high cost high stake shithere.
Okay.
And people need to understandthis
Angie Yu (49:25):
Exactly.
It's not just all tampons andpads.
Kristy Yee (49:31):
Irving's question is how can people who don't
menstruate better support thepeople that do.
Angie Yu (49:36):
I would say pay attention, like pay attention.
Obviously Irving pays attention.
Obviously Mike pays attention.
Obviously all these other peoplewho gave us really good insight
into their experiences with, thewomen in their lives have been
listening and paying attention.
Not attention as like you knowwhat I mean?
Ah, fuck.
What is that word?
Like?
Listen, if women have somethingto say about period, like,
(49:59):
listen, it's not, it's not justsomething that affects women.
So that means you don't have tolisten to it.
Kristy Yee (50:05):
I have two things.
The first thing I wanted to sayis just because it happens every
month, doesn't mean that theseverity is diluted.
So I feel like when we areexposed to things, a lot of
times then it's not often talkedabout, or they feel like the
(50:27):
impact is not very strongbecause it's not newsworthy.
Right.
It's just like, well, this is,this is just shit that happens
every month.
But yeah, it's shit that happensevery month, but every time it's
different, One of our previous,contributors said, it's
basically our bodies rebuildingour linings all over again.
Like it's really fucking amazinghow our bodies can do that.
(50:52):
And just because we haveexperience of going through it
every month, doesn't mean thatit gets easier every month it
doesn't make it any lessunworthy to talk about just
because it's happening everymonth.
Angie Yu (51:05):
ah, that's a very good point.
Kristy Yee (51:07):
And the second thing that I wanted to say is to
advocate alongside with us,don't just make this, the job of
the women to advocate forourselves.
Like, as you said, seek tounderstand and seek to learn the
impacts, but also.
You know, I mentioned, we talkedabout this earlier.
it's not just up to us.
(51:28):
It's also like we need everybodyinvolved when it comes to
advocating things for, you know,reducing the tax or, or making
sure that we are able to takesick leave or changing policies
around what gets covered inhealthcare.
Like these are things that arenot just up to women to advocate
for.
We also need everybody else toadvocate alongside with us and
(51:55):
make us tea and bring us darkchocolates.
That'd be a great way to.
Angie Yu (52:00):
And I think that wraps up this episode
Kristy Yee (52:02):
Thank you again to all of our friends who helped us
out on this episode.
We hope that some of y'all pooptroops will feel a little bit
heard because we don't, we don'ttalk about periods enough.
And for folks who didn't know asmuch, maybe you had learned
something today.
Angie Yu (52:51):
And I think that wraps up this episode, thanks for
listening and see you next time.
Kristy Yee (52:58):
wow.
Angie Yu (53:00):
I'm also tired too.
Okay, health check 1, 2, 3, 4,
Angie Yu (00:03):
Looking pretty good.
Kristy Yee (00:05):
We are going to be talking about periods and
menstruation.
This episode was I was going tosay, this episode is brought to
you by
Angie Yu (00:13):
To you by mother nature.
Kristy Yee (00:41):
Welcome back to another episode of shit.
We don't tell mom today.
We're going to be talking aboutmenstruation.
This episode was requested byone of our poop troops, Lauren,
and, and she said, I think onetaboo subject you guys should
talk about would bemenstruation.
(01:03):
Women are definitely treatedlike their bodies is disgusting,
even though ministration ishighly natural and signals that
everything is working like itshould be.
And that women is healthy.
Absolutely agree with you.
So what we decided to do was asksome of our friends,
specifically some maleidentifying friends, and we
asked them two questions.
(01:24):
And the first one, the first oneis, and the first one is, tell
me something off the top of yourhead, about menstruation without
Googling, the more candid, thebetter.
And the second question was toask us something about
menstruation.
So we're going to be sharingwhat our friends have responded
(01:46):
with their statement aboutministration, as well as what
their question is for us
Angie Yu (01:51):
yeah, exactly.
Just to emphasize, these are 10of our friends, 10 of Christie's
friends there are some mutualfriends.
We didn't ask the same persontwice, but also this is not a
very accurate representation ofmen everywhere.
Kristy Yee (02:04):
Oh, yes.
Very, very good point.
Yeah.
This is what we're going to betalking about today is not a
representation of women ingeneral, because it's just going
to be Angie and I's experiencesand is not a representation of
what men think or have thoughtsabout in general because our
sample, our sampling methods arenot very great.
(02:25):
I also asked my partner and hisresponse was.
Is no good, so much pains, likemy GI, but no instant relief
after explosion and byexplosion, he means like
diarrhea and the toilet
Angie Yu (02:40):
GI as in gastro
Kristy Yee (02:43):
intestinal.
Yes.
Gastrointestinal GI.
So like, gut problems.
And then, and then the secondquestion or his second response
to, or his response to thesecond question was why don't
all girls that don't want to bepreggers, just get an IUD.
I'm gonna answer that.
(03:03):
just from my own knowledge and Idon't know, again, not
representative of all females, Iwould say cost is a huge factor
because an IUD ain't cheap thatshit's like$400.
The second thing would be.
Because you might not besuitable to have an IUD
(03:25):
insertion or you, your bodycould reject the IUD.
So it's not even an option foryou.
Angie Yu (03:32):
Yeah.
Yep.
And that's, pretty much eithermy experience or the experience
with people I know as well.
So that's a pretty good answerto wrap that up and also IUD
painful.
It's not like it's not like Istill get, I get horrible crimes
from my IUD, but anyway,
Kristy Yee (03:47):
Hmm.
That's a different experience
Angie Yu (03:50):
as a completely different experience, my.
cramps I've actually gottenworse just because there's
something there.
so it's, it's gotten better inthe sense that it doesn't last
as long and my periods arelighter and whatever, but, my
cramps are like instead of adull pain, like I used to be,
it's now a sharp pain.
Kristy Yee (04:10):
You talk to your gynecologist about.
Angie Yu (04:12):
Yeah.
I have it's it's normal.
Well, it's not, it's not common,but it's normal.
Kristy Yee (04:18):
Hmm.
Angie Yu (04:19):
Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh.
And also, I get about threedays, but it's every other day
it's really annoying.
So like, I'll get it for a day.
The next day it'll be gone.
I'm like, okay, great.
And then I'll get it again theday after.
And then maybe two day goes byand then I'll have some.
Kristy Yee (04:37):
okay.
So let's talk about IUD.
The, since we're talking aboutIUD, so it's, so Angie has an
IUD.
And so do I, I have the, I havea type called marina and that's
the one that's the non copperone.
It's the five-year one.
And when I first had my IUD, Ihad a lot of troubles having it
(04:57):
being inserted.
So it took me three differenttimes to go to.
Different clinics with differentinserters, different doctors to
stick it up.
My vagina.
Angie Yu (05:13):
Uterus.
Kristy Yee (05:15):
well you, you gotta like pass through the vagina to
get to the uterus.
Angie Yu (05:19):
for those who are listening for the men listening,
like it goes in the uterus.
Kristy Yee (05:23):
So anyways, that the experience of getting the IUD
was no fun after the IUD, Idon't typically feel, I don't
feel it and I don't feel like mycramps are any worse.
So already we have polarizingexperiences with the IUD.
I actually don't really get myperiod anymore.
(05:46):
So I've saved a lot of money onpads and tampons in the last
five years, which has beenexcellent.
Angie Yu (05:54):
Do you think that has offset the cost of the IUD?
Kristy Yee (05:58):
Probably, but I haven't done the math.
your next friend is.
Angie Yu (06:03):
This is from my friend, Mike.
Oh, this is a long way.
The variety of experiences fromperson to person is incredible.
Whether that's heaviness,thickness, length, regularity,
pain, scale of cramps bracket,if any other body effects EEG,
acne.
It's not just everyone bleedinga little bit for, for a week
every month.
So that's his fact.
(06:23):
And that's a really well putit's pretty woke of him.
Kristy Yee (06:27):
Wow.
I, I really liked that he wentinto the heaviness, the
thickness, the length, theregularity, the pain scale.
Like that's pretty, prettycomprehensive.
I must say.
Angie Yu (06:36):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (06:37):
Good job, Mike.
Angie Yu (06:39):
a few questions for you.
How do you approach sex?
When menstruating, have youencountered guys who refuse to
go near you or insist on analslash BJ's?
Kristy Yee (06:52):
How do I approach it?
Oh, God, I guess it depends onwhere I'm at in the relationship
with this person.
If it's my first time, like, howdo I put this?
If we haven't had sex while Iwas already on my period, then I
(07:12):
w I would actually feel awkwardand uncomfortable.
And, but I would really want it,
Angie Yu (07:20):
oh, yes.
Kristy Yee (07:20):
So, and, and like, if it feels better, I think it
feels better,
Angie Yu (07:27):
I don't know if that's I, yeah.
I don't know why that it wouldbe the case.
Cause biologically it doesn'tmake sense, but I agree.
Kristy Yee (07:35):
I think.
Okay.
And this is the part where I'mforgetting all of my bio 12.
I think it's like the thicknessof your walls
Angie Yu (07:44):
Oh,
Kristy Yee (07:45):
that
Angie Yu (07:46):
and then, and your uterus is lower.
Kristy Yee (07:48):
And then also like hormones happening, so, and
hormones make you few things.
Angie Yu (07:56):
Oh
Kristy Yee (07:57):
how do I, how do I approach it?
I would just, I would tell themand be like, yo, so I'm on my
period.
And then, and then let, and thenit kind of gauge their response
to see their comfort level.
If it's like a hot and steamymake-out session, you know what
I mean?
And then it's, it's like leadingto sex.
(08:20):
I know I'm like flowing, then I,it wouldn't be a no, or yes, it
would just be like,
Angie Yu (08:29):
Let's
Kristy Yee (08:30):
pause.
Let's pause for make-outsession.
Let me just tell you, so I alsohave my period right now gauge
their response.
And if they're like, okay, let'sgrab a towel and I'll be like,
all right, let's do this.
Angie Yu (08:44):
Let's go Battelle.
Good.
Kristy Yee (08:46):
like my favorite line, because not only are they,
you know, if they don't care andthey just want to get it on,
they are also considerate of thebedsheets.
Angie Yu (08:58):
yes.
Kristy Yee (08:58):
And I don't know, that's just like extra hot.
Angie Yu (09:01):
The towel is very important, even if it might seem
silly.
The towel is very important forthe exact reasons that Kristi
has just said.
Kristy Yee (09:09):
So poop troops get a towel.
Angie Yu (09:13):
So the second question he had was, do you openly talk
about menstruating with otherguys in your life
Kristy Yee (09:19):
wait, hold up, hold up, hold up.
Mike also says, have you, haveyou encountered guys who refuse
to go near you or insists onanal slash BJ's instead?
I don't recall.
Angie Yu (09:32):
They would just be like, oh, okay.
And then they seem like a littlebit dejected from it, then it's
like, okay, whatever, they'renot into it, but I don't think
anybody would be like, EO gross,get away from me or insist like
you have to pleasure me adifferent way.
Like, I don't think I've been inthose situations because that
would be a pretty shittysituation to be in.
Kristy Yee (09:51):
I mean, okay.
So you know how like a memory isfake because you just make it up
every time you revisit thatmemory.
Angie Yu (09:58):
huh.
Kristy Yee (09:59):
I feel like it may have happened to me before.
Like where someone had refusedbecause I was on my period and
they may even have suggested Ido something else to continue to
pleasure them.
Instead
Angie Yu (10:16):
Did you grab a towel and whip them in the face?
Kristy Yee (10:21):
in hindsight, that's what I should have done,
Angie Yu (10:23):
I'm sorry, you went through that.
That's really
Kristy Yee (10:25):
but I, I don't actually remember if that really
happened or not.
So it, it may or may not havehappened and I can think of the
person.
Angie Yu (10:34):
Hmm.
Kristy Yee (10:35):
let's go to the next question.
Not that I'm avoiding, butthere's nothing more to say
there.
Angie Yu (10:41):
So Mike's next question is, do you openly talk
about menstruating with otherguys in your life?
If you're hesitant, why is that?
And what do you need in order tofeel comfortable talking about
it and normalizing it inconversation?
Kristy Yee (10:54):
I feel like it's not up to us to normalize it because
we do.
I think it's more like menshould normalize talking about
the females in their life.
And then going throughmenstruation and educating
themselves about menstruation.
Angie Yu (11:12):
I agree.
Kristy Yee (11:14):
So do I openly talk about it?
I think that depends.
Like if I'm on my period, I'lllet people know I'm on my
period,
Angie Yu (11:22):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (11:23):
I probably won't be like, oh, today was a heavy
flow.
I got to have to change threetimes and it got onto my pants.
Well, actually, you know, what,if it was that bad, I might just
Angie Yu (11:34):
it depends, like, it depends, like, think of it like
a bowel movement.
Does it warrant a story?
Like, you know, if it was justlike a normal thing, you're not
going to update your friends,but it was just so bad or so
good.
You might say to your friend,Hey, today was a 10 out of 10.
Kristy Yee (11:51):
yes, that is correct.
Treat menstruation like bowelmovements.
Oh my God.
Is that our takeaway from today?
My goodness.
Angie Yu (12:00):
terms of talking about
Kristy Yee (12:01):
do I hesitate?
Not, no, not anymore.
I think I would have hesitatedwhen I was younger because it
was, something you just don'ttalk about.
Right.
It's another taboo subject insociety.
So I think, you know, in highschool or even university, I
might not talk about it as much.
(12:22):
It would be more like, do youhave a tampon?
I can borrow, you know, likepulling people to the side and
whispering to them like, yo, canyou check my pants?
And you would always just dothat with a fellow female
friend.
Angie Yu (12:35):
Yes.
Kristy Yee (12:36):
You know, I still might not ask a guy friend to
check my pants.
I don't know.
Now this question's making me
Angie Yu (12:42):
Yeah, I don't think I would.
ask a guy friend to check mypants either yeah, because like
you said, like, I don't knowwhat their comfort level is.
And I agree with Kristy ahundred percent about what you
said about how it's up to men tonormalize it and not us to
normalize it because we'reobviously comfortable talking
about it with people who arecomfortable with it, AKA other
(13:03):
women, but we'll never know if aman is comfortable with it or
not.
And I don't know what a solutionthat would be like.
I don't think all the men shouldgo up to their female friends,
be like, Hey, is your flow heretoday?
Hey, what is your next period?
I want to like normalize it withyou.
so I don't know.
I don't know.
I think it also depends on likesociety too.
(13:24):
Like Tom on commercials used tohave like that blue liquid
Kristy Yee (13:27):
Yeah.
Yeah, it fucking looks like dishsoap.
Angie Yu (13:30):
I'm like whose kind of alien is objecting, blue period
fluid out of their vagina.
like I think it was like, thisis avatar period while I, while,
you know, like, I think it wasonly recently or something like
maybe even last year that theystarted changing it to red.
I don't know.
(13:51):
I don't watch commercialsanymore.
Kristy Yee (13:52):
I didn't even notice that I'm, I'm glad that there's
some form of societal shifthappening, that they are
updating the color of the bloodrepresentation in commercials.
I, we started this episodesaying like, we're not going to
be uncomfortable.
We're going to be supercomfortable because we have our
(14:13):
periods.
But now I feel a little bituncomfortable because I'm
thinking like, why, what, why doI need to base my comfort level
about my period on anotherperson's comfort level?
is that just me beingconsiderate of another person's
Angie Yu (14:33):
I would say it's being more considerate because you
can't automatically assume thateveryone's comfortable talking
about bodily fluid.
Like ministration itself shouldnot be taboo, but it's still a
body fluid.
And I'm not just going to goaround talking about my saliva,
my snot and my farts with,
Kristy Yee (14:50):
Okay.
No, I liked that.
I liked that.
We typically don't talk abouteach of those bodily fluids, but
that's what this podcast is allabout.
Why are this shit wascomfortable?
Angie Yu (15:03):
Well, I don't know if it's uncovered, like for me, and
like, I'm not going to talk to astranger about it because I
don't think they would care.
And then I, with my friends,again, I'm not going to talk to
them about it, unless I thinkit's a funny story, but I, but I
will say that like between mypartner and I I'm pretty open
with that stuff.
Kristy Yee (15:22):
yeah, me too.
But I just, I just feel like itshould go beyond our partners.
You know what I'm saying?
Angie Yu (15:28):
Yeah.
Also I'll talk about poops withmy close friends and periods
with my close friends.
Kristy Yee (15:34):
You bet.
How many of those people aremen?
Final question from Mike.
Just how expensive is it whenyou take into account pads,
tampons cups, period, underwear,et cetera, any suggestions on
how to make products moreaffordable and available for
everyone who needs.
Angie Yu (15:53):
Mike has seen a few roadside boxes in Vancouver,
stocked with free products forpeople who might need them.
That's actually a really goodquestion.
I guess I'm lucky I've neverhad, I've never had to think
about like, oh my God, I can'tafford this because I gotta go
buy pads and tampons.
I think the people who are mostvulnerable would see this as
(16:15):
like a really limiting issue.
Like if they don't have enoughpads or tampons that maybe they
can't leave the house.
Kristy Yee (16:22):
Like just how expensive?
I don't know, because I didn'tdo the math, but a box of
tampons?
How much has that like sevenbucks for a thing of 30?
Angie Yu (16:30):
I think it's 10 99 for a thing of 36.
Kristy Yee (16:33):
okay?
And a fucking gruesome math, soit's okay.
Love this shit.
There's like PST and just to addsome cracks was going to be like
1231.
Okay.
So, divided by 36.
So it's about like 34 cents pertampon.
(16:56):
Okay.
So now how many tampons wouldyou go through per month?
Would you say?
Angie Yu (17:00):
before I had my IUD, I think this should be based on
Kristy Yee (17:03):
Yeah.
Based on pre IUD.
Yes.
Yes.
Angie Yu (17:05):
Ooh.
On my heaviest days, I wouldprobably go through like five or
six and then lighter days Iwould still go through like
three or four, but it'd be thelight version.
Cause you don't want to wear,the wrong tampon size for your
flow.
Cause you can get toxic shocksyndrome.
Kristy Yee (17:21):
So just get, just give me a number
Angie Yu (17:24):
Okay.
Let's just
Kristy Yee (17:25):
How many?
Angie Yu (17:26):
20 a month
Kristy Yee (17:27):
20 per period.
Okay.
You and I have very differentperiod routines.
So for me, I definitely.
Struggle every time I'm in thetampon and period, period,
tampons and pads aisle in thegrocery, in the grocery store or
in the pharmacy, because theyare really fucking expensive.
(17:47):
And I will typically choose thecheapest version.
And I, I have in the past, likeration my use of pads.
So I will have one pad a day andthen I will line it with toilet
paper.
So then I just change out thetoilet paper.
And then the pad is just like asextra protection, but really
(18:11):
it's toilet paper.
That's doing all of theabsorption tampons.
I only use one a day.
And I don't switch between lightor non light.
And this is probably like not, Idon't take this as advice.
I'm just saying what I had done.
tampons are more expensive thanpads.
So I would only use tampons ifit was a convenient thing to do,
(18:32):
like if I was playing a sportthat day, and would be better to
use the tampon for example.
Angie Yu (18:37):
so while you were talking, I was listening Dory.
I also Googled like how much doCanadian women use spend on
tampon actually, according toestimates by the Huffington
post, the average woman usesabout five liners and 20 tampons
per cycle.
So I was
Kristy Yee (18:54):
Holy shit.
Angie Yu (18:56):
on par.
Kristy Yee (18:57):
I am definitely.
Below average.
Angie Yu (19:00):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (19:01):
I've, I've never purchased liners.
The only time I've ever usedliners are donations from
friends.
So I am the fucking recipient ofdonations.
So people will give me their,leftover tampons or pads or
whatever, because like perhapsthey got an IUD and then they
stopped flowing and they haveextra stock.
So they'll, they'll give it tome because I am, I am poor.
Angie Yu (19:25):
You're frugal.
Kristy Yee (19:26):
I am frugal because I am frugal and it's, you know,
it's gonna need to be usedanyways.
Right.
Okay.
So, next person
Angie Yu (19:32):
Oh, wait.
No, don't forget about all theunderwear you throw away when
you leak.
Kristy Yee (19:37):
Oh, I don't throw them away.
Angie Yu (19:38):
I've also thrown away jeans because I just, no matter
how many times I wash it, itcould not come out.
Kristy Yee (19:43):
Ah,
Angie Yu (19:43):
Yeah.
So jeans, underwear, and then Iended up buying some of those,
some of those leak-proofunderwear and they're expensive.
They're like almost$50 a pair,but then
Kristy Yee (19:53):
Holy fuck.
Angie Yu (19:55):
But then they'll save my$100 jeans.
Kristy Yee (19:57):
Yeah, we live
Angie Yu (19:58):
Okay.
Kristy Yee (20:01):
So the next person we have is Tom and Tom says pads
have stickies wings anddifferent thicknesses.
It happens about once a month.
It's painful and messy andlimited activities is the
discharge of lining of anunfertilized egg, not incorrect,
Tom, So his question is mybiggest confusion are about
(20:23):
ovulation timing that I wasreally surprised.
I'm like, okay.
Angie Yu (20:28):
Yeah, that's it?
Yeah.
I mean, that's part of thecycle, I don't think about it.
And, I don't even know what thatwell, myself, I just know that
observation comes first.
And then after a while, likewhat he said that I was like,
well, my time is up here by, andthen period comes.
Kristy Yee (20:48):
I was going to attempt to explain it, but then
I don't want to use theincorrect terminologies, but
yes, obviously comes first.
Now the fact that Angie and Idon't think about the ovulation
cycle does not indicate howunimportant it is because for
people who are trying to getpregnant, that is fucking gold.
Okay.
To no more listen to thatepisode that we had with Georgie
(21:09):
ma what episode is that?
Angie Yu (21:11):
I was a 14.
Kristy Yee (21:13):
14, listen to episode 14, we'll link in the
show notes.
And that one is amazing becauseGeorgia talks all about how she
times her oblation and there waswhat was it like sticks to she
had,
Angie Yu (21:28):
Yes.
Those things where you pee on itto see if you're ovulating, I
like how you remember stuff likethat, but then I remember
exactly which episode is.
Kristy Yee (21:36):
see, we compliment each other.
Angie Yu (21:37):
exactly.
Okay.
Next question.
So my friend said that one ofhis wife's friends has a health
condition where, where they haveperiods for like months at a
time.
Sounds scary.
That does sound scary.
I think right now it soundsscary to me because I don't know
what it is.
Kristy Yee (21:55):
correct.
I once had my period for, Ithink, two and a half months
nonstop.
Angie Yu (22:01):
Whoa.
Kristy Yee (22:03):
Yeah,
Angie Yu (22:05):
And what, what happened?
Like did you go to the doctor?
Kristy Yee (22:07):
It was an issue with my IUD.
It was basically coming out ofmy body.
So when you first get an IUDwhere we're talking about, this
is a IUD episode, everyone,typically when you first get
your IUD in the first sixmonths, they like to monitor it
to make sure that it's still inplace and it's not moving
around.
And once it's been in there forsix months, then you're, you're
(22:29):
pretty good to go.
So after you get your IUD, youget a checkup in six months and
they're like, yep, you're goodto go.
And then you'd kind of just,it's like set it and forget it.
My IUD, the, or the first IUDthat I had after about a year
and a half, it started to movearound and then my body wanted
to get rid of it.
And so it was treating it liketrying to shed a lining.
(22:53):
So it just kept having theperiod nonstop because it was
literally, my body was trying toget rid of this foreign.
Angie Yu (23:03):
oh, I
Kristy Yee (23:04):
So I just kept having my period for like two
and a half straight months untilI finally went to the gyno.
I'm like, yo, so it's been likesometime, and then they just
take it out.
this is super rare.
So anybody who's listening andthey're freaking out about
getting an IUD, this is super,super rare.
It's one of those like 0.3%chances.
(23:25):
And I was the 0.3.
So I already, I already took the0.3, so you're good to go.
Angie Yu (23:32):
I said, what the heck, like earlier, when we first
started talking about IUD, youmade your sound like it was such
a smooth process and now you'relike, bam, just kidding.
I had, I bled for two and a halfmonths cause
Kristy Yee (23:42):
I also said, I also said I needed three people to
like insert it in.
Angie Yu (23:46):
Oh, right, right, right, right.
You need a three inserters.
Kristy Yee (23:49):
Yeah, well, not at the same time.
Angie Yu (23:58):
I mean it's okay.
Kristy Yee (24:02):
I mean, I think like the, that condition does sound
pretty extreme and pretty scaryto have.
So this is not a medicalpodcast, so we're not going to
go into that, but that justsounds no funds at all.
And I hope that all is well.
My friend and something that heknows about menstruation is you
(24:26):
can take continuouscontraceptives to skip your
period and you can do thislongterm spoiler alert he's in
healthcare.
correct.
Yes.
Correct?
they may change your periodcycles or.
My actually stabilize it, whichis what pills had done for me.
Angie Yu (24:46):
One of my friends he asked, so he said there is blood
and women have different flows.
That was his statement.
Yes.
A very, very straightforward.
And his question is, is itcommon for most women to still
have sex while on their period?
Kristy Yee (25:01):
Well, I don't know if it's common and I can't speak
for most women, but I do it.
Angie Yu (25:07):
yeah.
Kristy Yee (25:09):
And do you do it and towels always, always offer to
bring a
Angie Yu (25:19):
I only do it when it's lighter though.
Not when it's heavy,
Kristy Yee (25:22):
Um, is, is it because of the discomfort or is
it because of, okay.
Is it because of the physicaldiscomfort caused by cramping or
is it caused by the mentaldiscomfort of knowing you are
heavy flowing?
Angie Yu (25:35):
the mental discomfort.
Kristy Yee (25:39):
Y,
Angie Yu (25:41):
I also just don't like the feeling, if it's really
heavy, it's like two lubricatedwas that TMI.
Kristy Yee (25:50):
I don't think there's such thing as TMI on
this podcast.
Angie Yu (25:54):
It's just like, I don't know.
It's just like, if there's toomuch, it's just, I don't, it
doesn't feel great.
Kristy Yee (25:59):
like, it's too slippery, like a fucking slip
and slide.
Just like too much slurp slurp.
Angie Yu (26:04):
Yeah.
Not that I have actually doneit, but I feel like it would
just be too.
Yeah.
Slip aside,
Kristy Yee (26:10):
Hm.
Maybe that's why I prefer itbecause I naturally am on the
drier side so that when I am onmy period, it's like, I need
that extra lubricant, you know?
The next person G L says fortheir statement, periods may
affect women's mood andtemperament negatively.
(26:31):
What do you think about that?
Angie Yu (26:34):
Yes for me.
Kristy Yee (26:36):
Yeah, I say it's a pretty blanketed statement.
I mean
Angie Yu (26:38):
it is pretty blanketed.
Kristy Yee (26:40):
And then their question is how do you cope with
menstruation slash periods?
Angie Yu (26:46):
oh, so I used to have this fuzzy water bottle I would
fill it up with hot water and Idon't know, it just makes it
like a little bit nicer ratherthan sitting there with like a
rubber thing on my, on my lowerabdomen.
I had to use it all the time onmy lower abdomen and all my
lower back.
Kristy Yee (27:03):
I definitely agree with having hot things.
I also say hot beverages arehelpful.
And to that I purposely avoidcold beverages.
That's definitely wisdom passedon from my mother that
surprisingly works for me.
(27:24):
And so I do find that when Iavoid cold beverages, my cramps
are way better and having hotbeverages are actually soothing
and they are.
Angie Yu (27:36):
Yeah.
And it's not something on theless physical side is I always
give my self the day off.
When I have a reallybackgrounds, they usually
happens like the first day of myperiod.
and I'm just like in the worstmood.
And I don't think that's why Ithink at that point, it's not
even a hormonal cause thehormonal mood thing usually
comes like the week before forme on that day where like I have
(27:59):
bad cramps and I just feel like,shit, I feel bloated.
I just give myself a day off.
Of course I know that's not aluxury that everybody can have.
And sometimes I can't take thatday off, but if I can, I will
and to add to Mike's earlierquestion, one thing to add to
that list of causes likepainkillers,
Kristy Yee (28:18):
Yes.
Angie Yu (28:19):
And just, you know, taking a day off, some women
might lose their wages becausethey needed a day off or time
off to rest.
So actually, you know, the costof periods is way more than just
tampons.
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (28:33):
correct?
Yes.
Angie Yu (28:34):
this next question is from Steve.
you guys might remember Stevefrom episode 28
Kristy Yee (28:39):
where we talk about resiliency as Steve shared his
stories, when he moved over toVietnam and then had a major low
and he shared that story withus.
So check.
We will link it in the shownotes.
So let's, let's hear what Stevehas to say.
(30:12):
So I do want to say it doesn'thappen always in high school,
because my happened inelementary school.
When did you first get your, ah,
Angie Yu (30:21):
Yeah.
I got mine when I was 11,
Kristy Yee (30:23):
I don't know what grade that is.
I go by grades.
Angie Yu (30:24):
grade I remember.
The first time I got, it wasactually when I went to camp
with elementary school, we wentonto this like partially
subsidized trip, which waspretty cool.
We went camping.
We were asked if we wanted to goon the speedboat and I put my
hand up and then I just rememberit being really cold on the
water, but then it felt reallywarm where my crush was.
(30:47):
And I'm like, this is weird.
Cause I was really fucking coldand wet, but I felt like warm
liquid.
And I'm like that can't be mypee.
I know I'm not peeing.
and then of course, like afterwe got back to the campus, I
went to the bathroom and I waslike, oh, and I don't remember
what I did, but I must haveasked the teacher about it
Kristy Yee (31:06):
you know, that's something we don't talk about
enough of because yeah.
People know it's blood.
Okay.
But blood comes from the bodyand it is warm.
And so when it just leaks out ofyour body and into your
underwear, it doesn't just like,you know, trickle down your
thighs.
It stays in there.
It's like kind of trapped inthere.
Angie Yu (31:28):
so you know what, Steve don't feel bad that you
thought it was gross at first,because I also thought it was
gross at first,
Kristy Yee (31:33):
I don't remember the sensation of my first time, but
I do remember that it was onFebruary 14th.
So I was in grade seven and Idon't remember how I discovered
it, but for sure, I went to ateacher and freaked out and they
called my mom and my mom came toschool and this is a big deal
(31:55):
because I live with my dad.
My dad has full custody of me.
My teacher at the time was alsoreally helpful.
And they like slipped me a padin the washroom and taught me
how to use it.
But yeah, I must say kudos toall the elementary school and
high school teachers who havebeen there for us during this
(32:16):
time.
Angie Yu (32:17):
Yeah,
Kristy Yee (32:18):
We don't appreciate them enough for that.
Angie Yu (32:20):
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (32:21):
Okay.
So then our next friend who alsoshared with us, his name was
also Steve.
So Steve, number two there arefact to share is there's this
awful thing called dysmenorrhea?
I think it's caused byoverzealous.
(32:41):
I think it's caused byoverzealous uterine muscles,
trying to mold exquisite pain,apparently hot compress and
orgasms help with pain.
Very good, Steve,
Angie Yu (32:54):
my God.
Like that's what I have.
I have dysmenorrhea
Kristy Yee (32:58):
and you also have hot compresses and orgasms to
help with your pain.
It is a proven treatment method.
Everyone
Angie Yu (33:09):
yes, they go, well, I'm very impressed that he knows
what dysmenorrhea is.
Cause a lot of women don't knowwhat dysmenorrhea is.
So I know normally say, oh, Ihave dysmenorrhea.
And cause it sounds likediarrhea.
Not that there's anything wrongwith diarrhea, but you know,
just
Kristy Yee (33:23):
No.
I know, but like, so then whatdo people, people will just
think that you said diarrhea.
Angie Yu (33:29):
Well, they'll just be like, oh, what's dysmenorrhea.
And then I have to go intoexplaining it.
So I usually just say, oh, Ihave really bad cramps.
And then there's no need toexplain.
Yeah, well, yeah.
Dysmenorrhea is just like, it'sexactly what Steve said.
And, yeah, it's painful.
I remember back in high school,there was one time where I
nearly passed out.
Kristy Yee (33:44):
oh my God.
Angie Yu (33:45):
I was, basically like on the table, like with my head
buried in my arms, this wasduring like an English class and
I looked up and my teacher waslike, oh my God is everything
okay.
And I was like, like, how thehell does he know?
Right.
Cause this was during like, 20minute reading hour reading, 20
(34:09):
minutes of reading.
Do you remember the.
Kristy Yee (34:12):
I just realized what was wrong with that sentence.
Angie Yu (34:16):
Do you not remember what we had silent reading.
We had mandatory, reading
Kristy Yee (34:20):
I mean, I forgot all about it until you just
mentioned it, but yes, I
Angie Yu (34:24):
It really unlocked a memory.
during silent reading, which is20 minutes before lunchtime, I
was just collapsed on the tableand people do that all the time.
Like people would just wouldjust nap instead of reading.
So when I looked up and he saidthat I was really surprised
because like, how would he knowI was in so much pain?
Apparently he said, my face waswhite as a ghost.
And then I went to the nurse'soffice and I was there for like
(34:44):
the next three hours, basically.
Kristy Yee (34:45):
Holy shit.
Angie Yu (34:46):
Yeah, there was lots.
I actually spent a lot of timein the nurses office in high
school when I was on my period,because I couldn't even sit up
straight in class.
Kristy Yee (34:57):
That's really debilitating.
And like, I don't think so.
Not everybody has this, but Ithink when people do have it,
it's, it's really tough becausea lot of people don't understand
and they don't really have thefull empathy of like, oh, this
is not just a period.
This is actually a healthcondition.
(35:18):
Like something extra is going onon top of my period.
And it really affects yourability to participate.
Do work and study and et cetera,et cetera.
So
Angie Yu (35:31):
Yeah.
And that could be the reason whymy IUD is still giving me a lot
of, a lot of pain.
but it has definitely reducedthe frequency and the length of
my, of my cramps, because that'swhat the hormones.
Kristy Yee (35:45):
so Steve's question is do people who've been
straight know when hormones aremessing up their mood.
So do you know, and when yourhormones are like going haywire,
Angie Yu (35:57):
I do now, because now I'm on medication for bipolar.
So my moods are more stabilizedanyway, I didn't use to.
And I used to be like, oh,that's a myth because my mood
changes all the time, but now Iactually notice it.
so all of a sudden I'll be a bitmore moody than usual.
And by moody, I don't just meanlike angry by moody.
(36:17):
As in like my moods change veryrapidly, like go from happy to
sad really quickly, which iskind of like what bipolar is
anyway.
And I'll be like, why am Ifeeling like this?
Oh wait, hold on.
I'm getting my period next week.
Kristy Yee (36:31):
would you ever get confused between like you're
bipolar acting up versus, oh, myperiod's coming.
Angie Yu (36:38):
Oh, yeah.
All the time.
I still don't know if that's thecase or not.
I just have to be like, well,I'm moody and what can I do?
Yeah.
Kristy Yee (36:45):
complicated, especially because like you're
still new to having medicationto help stabilize.
I'm glad that that in itself,because of the stabilization,
it's making things a little bitmore noticeable for you, but it
is it's tough.
Right?
And sometimes not sometimes Ithink all the time, you just
have to really pay attention toyourself and just learn what it
(37:07):
is about your body.
So for me, I feel like I did notfully understand, especially at
the beginning.
I think now that we're in ourthirties, we have experienced,
we have experienced thesensation of having a period a
little bit more now.
(37:28):
So we are a little bit more intuned with our body.
it's not always accurate.
I can sometimes tell when it'scoming or not.
And for me, because my peers areirregular and they've always
been irregular even before theIUD and all of that.
I've always had irregularperiods.
So I can never tell if I ambeing moody because my periods
(37:50):
coming.
Cause I can't just go and checkthe calendar and be like, oh
yeah, my peer should come nextweek.
So yeah, this explains itbecause I don't have a fucking
regular calendar nowadays.
I feel like I can sometimes tellboth physically and emotionally,
but some days I'm just wrong.
Like I'm like, oh, I think I canfeel, I feel a little bit more
(38:12):
irritable in the last few daysor I feel a little bit more
moody in the last few days.
I think maybe my peers comingup.
So I'll typically have thisconversation with my partner.
Right.
I'll be like, yeah, I'm feelingnot so great.
I think my periods coming and.
I
Angie Yu (38:28):
yeah.
And like, after going throughtherapy and learning how to
manage my emotions and just likelearning all about managing
bipolar for me at the end of theday, like even knowing why I'm
moving, doesn't actually helpthat much.
It helps definitely.
But it doesn't help as like,it's not like it'll go away just
because, you know, like, I, Ican't just act out because I'm
(38:52):
getting my period.
I tried to, you know, not makeit more difficult to other
people.
So I just tried to manage mymood.
Kristy Yee (38:58):
having your period is not an excuse to be an ass.
Angie Yu (39:01):
Yeah, exactly.
Kristy Yee (39:02):
And I also do want to say, I mean, again, I can't
speak for everybody, but I feellike the stereotype of being
very moody and, you know,hormones going everywhere while
yes, that is true.
And so many things are happeningto our body.
It's pretty subtle.
Sometimes it's not like all of asudden you're just some nice
(39:23):
dandy person.
And then, then you become amonster.
The next second, at least Ihaven't experienced such a
drastic shift in mood andbehavior.
It's pretty subtle.
So you may or may not notice.
And because first person, youknow, you're like the last
person to notice anything aboutyourself.
(39:43):
Right.
Everybody else kind of noticethings before you ever notice
things.
So you, you may feel like, oh,last few days, I'm like, yeah, a
little bit more irritable, alittle bit more sleepy.
Maybe I'm feeling I feel whenmy.
I was going to say stomach, butthat's not correct.
I can sometimes physically feelit, but again, sometimes I'm
(40:07):
wrong and my period doesn'tcome.
So basically what I'm saying isthe stereotype of PMs saying,
and being, I don't know, angryor craving foods while that does
happen.
It is more subtle than societytells it to be.
Angie Yu (40:25):
yes.
Well said
Kristy Yee (40:27):
Was it though?
Was it So the next person thatwe have is an anonymous person
and their statement is crampshurt like a bitch.
Angie Yu (40:43):
Not always.
Kristy Yee (40:44):
And that's it.
Yeah, not always, but.
There are no pancakes.
Like it's, it's not like it's afun time.
Like I would much rather nothave a cramp, but it doesn't
it's, it's not always like keelover fetal position.
(41:09):
Can't breathe hot compressionnow gonna die type of scenario.
Angie Yu (41:16):
yes,
Kristy Yee (41:19):
Your enthusiasm in this episode is riveting,
Angie Yu (41:22):
no, no.
You know why?
Because some of the questionsare getting repetitive, like,
oh, pain.
It's a, it seems like a lot ofthe questions or statements are
about the pain of menstruation.
So this is from my friend,Andrew, and this is what he
says.
I heard menstruation isbasically like this.
Literally every woman on theplanet has a body that prepares
(41:42):
them to have a baby every singlemonth.
And that body literally preparesthe perfect environment to
literally destroy the entireenvironment and rebuild that
shit all over again the nextmonth.
Kristy Yee (41:54):
I'm glad this person has an appreciation of what the
female body can do.
Angie Yu (41:59):
Yeah, it's pretty dope-ass
Kristy Yee (42:02):
What's the.
Angie Yu (42:04):
I'd be curious about certain rituals based on when
and where women are at withtheir menstruation cycle.
For instance, have girls timedesk so that they are more
creative or more energetic ormore tired on certain days of
their cycle.
And therefore do certainactivities during that time.
For instance, if day 12, thecycle, they usually notice
they're tired, then they savetheir favorite Netflix show for
(42:26):
that
Kristy Yee (42:27):
oh my goodness.
Okay.
Okay.
People cannot see my facialexpressions as you're listening
to this episode right now, butevery single point that Angie
had just read, I made adifferent face and each face was
less and less impressive becauseholy shit, does this person
(42:47):
think that we have that muchcontrol and like, I, okay.
I'm going to answer for me.
No.
Angie Yu (42:58):
the answer for me.
Yes.
I don't think he means, I thinkhis question, he means a more,
like, do you plan around yourcycle,
Kristy Yee (43:07):
Well, I cannot because my cycles unpredictable,
Angie Yu (43:10):
right?
Oh yeah.
Right, right.
That's true.
Kristy Yee (43:12):
I do plan vacations.
Like I try to plan vacations preIUD days.
I try to find some, like, try tohave a cycle, when I was on
birth control pills, that wouldbe way more predictable because
I can physically see it.
Right.
So having birth control pillsreally stabilized, and made my
(43:35):
period come a lot moreregularly.
Okay.
So, my friend Sam, his questionis, do girls ever blame their
period for their mood or is itjust an offensive to bring up no
matter what gender you are,period.
So I'm not sure what that latterpart means, but earlier I had
said having your period is notan excuse to be an asshole.
(43:56):
So I do feel like maybe somefolks would use their period as
some sort of an excuse to not bekind.
And I feel like that just paintswomen in general, with a
negative brush
Angie Yu (44:12):
I don't know if it's offensive, I guess the offensive
part.
Isn't the fact that you'rerelating it to your period
because yes.
You know what it does affectmood.
If I'm bloated and I have soreback and yeah, it's gonna affect
my mood, but I think it'soffensive if like, your
girlfriend, your friend, yourcoworker actually has something
legitimate to be upset about andyour responses, are you on your
(44:33):
period then?
That is very offensive becauseyou one you're gaslighting them.
You're trying to make them intothinking that they're crazy
because they have absolutelynothing to be upset about.
And then you blame it on their.
Body.
So I think in that case, it isincredibly offensive.
but yeah, again, I think it justlike bringing it up is depends
(44:54):
on the situation.
Kristy Yee (44:57):
yup.
Agree.
Okay.
So then, we're almost close tothe end next.
We have David and David's.
Periods are a week long and theyrequire chocolate she's POS and
normally something deep fry toappease the demon that is
ravaging, the poor woman.
Angie Yu (45:16):
Oh my, my,
Kristy Yee (45:20):
How is this accurate?
Angie Yu (45:22):
I don't know whether I should laugh or.
Like what you said earlier, likeit kind of is just the
stereotype.
Kristy Yee (45:29):
What I actually really like about this one is
that it's not, it's notstereotyping the woman who is
going through it's stereotypingthe situation, which.
Oh, it makes me feel a lotbetter about, because what makes
me feel not good about the wholestereotyping situation is when
you're just pointing fingers.
And then you're, you're saying,you know, like you're
gaslighting, like, oh, oh, she'sjust on her period.
(45:52):
Oh, it's just a PMs thing.
You know what I mean?
Like kind of blaming the personand saying, like seeing the
person sucks.
Whereas in this situation, Davidis like, oh, like this poor
woman, this thing is happeningto them.
Angie Yu (46:06):
That's true.
Poor.
Poor us.
Please buy me.
Lots of chocolate and cheesepuffs.
I so his question is why doeseverything I do bother you?
Poor, poor
Kristy Yee (46:18):
a sweet guy.
Angie Yu (46:20):
Is it because of the pain?
What can I do to dull said pain,cranberry pills?
Kristy Yee (46:26):
I'm just going to like, totally make assumptions
here, but I feel like poorDavid, it sounds like you have
been taking advantage of, Idon't know, does everything Nick
does bother you at the time ofyour month?
Angie Yu (46:40):
No, because everything he does bothers me all the time.
Kristy Yee (46:43):
Oh my God.
Angie Yu (46:44):
I'm kidding.
I'm kidding.
I love him very much.
no, I don't think so.
No.
No, I don't think so.
I don't think it's specificallyduring my period.
Kristy Yee (46:52):
We mentioned moods earlier, irritability, et
cetera, but I, I wouldn'tspecifically target it at a
person.
I'd be irritable.
Everything.
Like if my fucking Chromecast istaking 30 seconds longer to
connect.
Yeah.
I'm going to fucking flip shit.
Angie Yu (47:08):
that's true.
We're not irritable at you.
We're irritable next to you.
Kristy Yee (47:13):
it's just like, exactly.
We're just irritable in generaland this is only if it gets to
that point even.
Right.
So I'm going to say no, David.
It is, it's not you I know rightbefore David okay.
So our last one for today comesfrom one of our favorite people.
Irving Irving hat, Irving joinedus on our podcast back in
(47:38):
episode 22, where we talkedabout social justice and how to
talk about it with your parents.
So check that out again, linkingthe descriptions.
So Irving statement is a reallylong one.
So Irving says, I know I learneda lot about the cycle of
hormones and such in bio 12, butI don't remember anything.
(48:02):
What I do know is that periodssuck.
And Ken slash do heard a lotthat menstrual products are
highly sought after donationitems.
Ooh, correct.
That menstrual products aren'tcovered by healthcare.
Correct.
Also companies should offerpeople.
Who've been straight paid timeoff.
And before anyone argues withthis, if execs can give
(48:23):
themselves pay raises andbonuses during a fucking
pandemic, they can take care oftheir workers if they actually
cared about anything else.
But exploitations, this is allto say.
A lot of taboo and stigmacreated around periods and
administration is a thinginvented by the patriarchy to
solidify its own powers.
Angie Yu (48:41):
Yes.
Kristy Yee (48:42):
insert some like applauses pauses here, please.
Insert applause.
Yes.
The cost of menstrual products.
We had mentioned that throughoutthis episode, the cost of birth
controls and contraceptions andUDS, the cost of our clothing
that gets ruined the cost ofmedication to manage our pain,
the costs due to time loss atwork and productivity.
(49:07):
And then the cost of justfucking joy.
Because if you have your periodon your vacation and you can go
fucking swimming or scuba divingwith all your friends, okay.
That is just no funds.
Okay.
Is high cost high stake shithere.
Okay.
And people need to understandthis
Angie Yu (49:25):
Exactly.
It's not just all tampons andpads.
Kristy Yee (49:31):
Irving's question is how can people who don't
menstruate better support thepeople that do.
Angie Yu (49:36):
I would say pay attention, like pay attention.
Obviously Irving pays attention.
Obviously Mike pays attention.
Obviously all these other peoplewho gave us really good insight
into their experiences with, thewomen in their lives have been
listening and paying attention.
Not attention as like you knowwhat I mean?
Ah, fuck.
What is that word?
Like?
Listen, if women have somethingto say about period, like,
(49:59):
listen, it's not, it's not justsomething that affects women.
So that means you don't have tolisten to it.
Kristy Yee (50:05):
I have two things.
The first thing I wanted to sayis just because it happens every
month, doesn't mean that theseverity is diluted.
So I feel like when we areexposed to things, a lot of
times then it's not often talkedabout, or they feel like the
(50:27):
impact is not very strongbecause it's not newsworthy.
Right.
It's just like, well, this is,this is just shit that happens
every month.
But yeah, it's shit that happensevery month, but every time it's
different, One of our previous,contributors said, it's
basically our bodies rebuildingour linings all over again.
Like it's really fucking amazinghow our bodies can do that.
(50:52):
And just because we haveexperience of going through it
every month, doesn't mean thatit gets easier every month it
doesn't make it any lessunworthy to talk about just
because it's happening everymonth.
Angie Yu (51:05):
ah, that's a very good point.
Kristy Yee (51:07):
And the second thing that I wanted to say is to
advocate alongside with us,don't just make this, the job of
the women to advocate forourselves.
Like, as you said, seek tounderstand and seek to learn the
impacts, but also.
You know, I mentioned, we talkedabout this earlier.
it's not just up to us.
(51:28):
It's also like we need everybodyinvolved when it comes to
advocating things for, you know,reducing the tax or, or making
sure that we are able to takesick leave or changing policies
around what gets covered inhealthcare.
Like these are things that arenot just up to women to advocate
for.
We also need everybody else toadvocate alongside with us and
(51:55):
make us tea and bring us darkchocolates.
That'd be a great way to.
Angie Yu (52:00):
And I think that wraps up this episode
Kristy Yee (52:02):
Thank you again to all of our friends who helped us
out on this episode.
We hope that some of y'all pooptroops will feel a little bit
heard because we don't, we don'ttalk about periods enough.
And for folks who didn't know asmuch, maybe you had learned
something today.
Angie Yu (52:51):
And I think that wraps up this episode, thanks for
listening and see you next time.
Kristy Yee (52:58):
wow.
Angie Yu (53:00):
I'm also tired too.
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