October 8, 2025 • 23 mins
Some truths sting because they pull the mask off. The $70B diet machine thrives on your “failure,” selling restriction and then blaming your willpower when real life shreds the rules. We take a flamethrower to that narrative and replace it with something durable: design over discipline. When your environment and systems do the heavy lifting, healthy choices stop being a daily fight and start becoming your default.
We walk through the psychology of decision fatigue and why busy, high-performing people hit a wall by dinnertime. From there, we get tactical. Jonathan shares the exact systems he used to drop 140 pounds and keep it off—no gym persona required. Think pantry design that eliminates nightly negotiations, water as the first grab everywhere you go, walking meetings that don’t steal time, and simple “plan, don’t react” meal decisions that prevent hunger-driven detours. The aim isn’t heroics; it’s friction removal. When you engineer your day like you manage your business—with calendars, reminders, and automations—the need for willpower plummets.
You’ll hear why restriction backfires long-term, how small wins compound like interest, and the mindset shift that reframes weight loss from a test of grit to a systems problem you can solve. If you’ve been told to “just try harder,” this is your permission to get smarter instead. Start with one change that makes tomorrow’s healthy choice easier—remove the trigger snack, set a walking reminder, plan breakfast before bed—and let momentum build.
If this resonated, follow along for weekly, real-world tips, share the episode with someone stuck in the willpower loop, and leave a review so more people can find a no-BS path to sustainable weight loss. Your next smart choice can start today.
Lose Weight Without Starving or Obsessing! Learn the simple, no-BS system that helped me lose 140 pounds naturally—no extreme diets, no endless gym hours, just real, sustainable fat loss for real people.
Join the Effortless Weight Loss Academy HERE
Please leave me a review on whatever platform you listen to your podcasts.
Send me questions or comments to Jonathan.Ressler@gmail.com
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Announcer (00:02):
If you're a whiny snowflake that can't handle the
truth, is offended by the wordfuck and about 37 uses of it in
different forms, gets ass hurtwhen you hear someone speak the
absolute real and raw truth, youshould leave.
Like right now.
This is Shut Up and Shoes.
(00:22):
The podcast where we cutthrough the shit and get real
about weight loss, life, andeverything in between, we get
into the nitty-gritty of makingsmall, smart choices that add up
to big results.
From what's on your plate andhow you approach life's
challenges, we'll explore howthe simple act of choosing
(00:43):
differently can transform yourhealth, your mindset, and your
entire freaking life.
So, if you're ready to cutthrough the bullshit and start
making some real changes, thenbuckle up and shut it up,
because we're about to chooseour way to a healthier, happier
life.
This is Shut Up and Choose.
(01:04):
Let's do this.
Now your host, JonathanRessler.
Jonathan (01:13):
Hey, welcome back to Shut Up and Choose, the podcast
that cuts into noise andnonsense, and all the bullshit
$70 billion guidance are on yourway.
All those Instagram influencersand internet jerk-offs that are
telling you how to lose weightwho really don't have a clue.
They're just pitching thelatest and greatest, the newest,
and what they deem to be themost exciting thing, but the
truth is they have no clue.
(01:35):
In fact, they always talk aboutwillpower and discipline and
motivation, and all those thingsare a bunch of shit.
So if you think you fail theweight loss because you don't
have enough willpower, you'vebeen lied to.
Let me say it again, becauseit's probably the most important
thing you'll hear all week.
If you believe the reason youcan't lose weight is because
(01:55):
you're weak or lazy or don'thave enough discipline, that's
just not the truth.
That's the story that the $70billion diet industry wants you
to believe.
Here's how the game reallyworks they sell you a plan, a
program, a product, somethingbuilt around restriction,
extreme rules, or totallyunrealistic demands.
(02:16):
And when it inevitably fails,when you burn out, when you give
into cravings, or you fall offthe wagon, they don't take the
blame.
No, they point the finger rightback at you.
Hey, you didn't try hardenough, or you weren't
disciplined enough, or you don'thave enough willpower.
And what do you do?
You feel guilty.
You blame yourself, and thenyou go back and buy the next
(02:39):
program.
That's how the cycle repeatsyear after year.
If you think about it, it'sgenius marketing.
They make billions, but it'sterrible for your health, your
confidence, and your peace ofmind.
Because here's the truthwillpower has nothing to do with
long-term weight loss.
Think about it.
How many areas of your lifealready demand your willpower?
(03:01):
If you're a busy executive,your entire day is filled with
decisions, responsibilities,deadlines, and fires to put out.
By the time you get home, yourwillpower is shot.
You don't have the bandwidth towhite knuckle your way through
another diet.
And you shouldn't have to.
The real reasons diets failisn't because you're weak, it's
because they're designed tofail.
(03:22):
They depend on constantdiscipline, and discipline is a
finite resource.
Eventually, it just runs out.
So if willpower isn't theanswer, what is?
Well, that's what I'm going todive into today.
I'm going to show you the truthabout why discipline isn't the
key to lasting weight loss andwhat actually worked instead.
I'll break down for you how Ipersonally lost 140 pounds and
(03:44):
kept it off without relying onwillpower and how you can
finally escape the cycle thediet industry wants to keep you
trapped in.
So let me get into it.
So let's talk about willpower.
For decades, weight loss hasbeen sold to us as a simple
equation.
If you want it badly enough, ifyou're strict enough, if you're
disciplined enough, you'llsucceed.
(04:05):
The message is always the same.
Just try harder.
On the surface, it soundsreasonable, I guess.
People love simple answers.
Eat less, move more.
Stop being weak.
Power through.
It's packaged in tough lovelanguage that makes you think,
yeah, well, maybe I really dojust need to buckle down.
The problem with that is itdoesn't work.
(04:27):
Here's why.
Willpower is finite.
Every decision you make duringthe day, every stressful moment,
every demand on your timedrains that tank.
By the time you've made itthrough meetings and deadlines
and family obligations andeverything else that life throws
at you, how much willpower doyou think you realistically have
left to fight cravings, resisttemptation, or stick to some
(04:49):
punishing diet plan?
I know you know the answer, andit's not much.
And if you're like me, mostnights it felt like I had zero
left in the tank.
I can't tell you how many timesI've personally tried harder.
I told myself this time wouldbe different.
I know every single one of youlistening has said that.
I'd white knuckle my waythrough, I'd be stricter,
(05:12):
tougher, and more disciplined,and for a little while it
worked.
I follow the rules, I cut thecalories, I dropped some weight,
but eventually, every fuckingtime, I caved.
It wasn't because I didn't wantit enough, it wasn't because I
was weak.
It was because no one cansustain a life built on constant
self-denial and discipline.
(05:32):
Eventually, you get tired, yougive in, and then you start the
cycle all over again.
And here's the kicker.
The diet industry counts onthat.
That's exactly how they profit.
They build plans that requiresuperhuman levels of willpower.
When you can't sustain it, theydon't admit the system is
(05:53):
broken.
They tell you that you'rebroken.
They point the finger rightback at you.
You didn't try hard enough, youweren't disciplined enough, you
didn't have the willpower.
And because you believe them,you feel guilty.
You think it's your fault.
And then what do you do?
You go back, pull out yourwallet, and buy the next fucking
plan.
That's why the industry makes$70 billion a year.
(06:16):
Not because they're creatinglasting results, but because
they've convinced you thatfailure is your fault, and their
next solution is exactly whatyou need.
But let me tell you fromexperience, you don't need more
willpower.
You don't need more discipline.
You don't need to be tougher,you need a different approach
(06:37):
altogether.
And that's what we're going totalk about.
What actually works whenwillpower runs out, and how you
can build systems and choicesthat don't depend on constant
grit.
So, first thing is you have tounderstand this.
I've said it three times.
Willpower is finite.
It's not an unlimited resourceyou can call in anytime you want
(06:57):
to.
Every decision you makethroughout the day drains it.
What to wear, how to handlemeeting, what's in an email, how
to deal with a crisis, add instress and deadlines, traffic,
family issues, all that shitchips away your mental energy.
By the time you're staring atthe fridge at 7:30 at night,
your tank is empty.
You're not choosing betweendiscipline and weakness.
You're choosing with nothingleft to give.
(07:20):
This is especially true ifyou're a busy executive.
The people that I coach, theseare high-performed men and women
who run companies, lead teams,and make hundreds of decisions
every day.
Their willpower is alreadymaxed out before they even get
home.
And then, what do most dietsdemand?
That they summon even morewillpower to weigh food, to
count calories, and resistcravings.
(07:42):
That's a losing battle beforeit even starts.
And research backs this up.
The people who succeed atlong-term weight loss aren't the
ones with the strongestdiscipline.
They're the ones who designtheir environment so they don't
need discipline in the firstplace.
They remove the friction, theymake good choices, automatic,
and they rely on systems, notgrit.
(08:02):
So let me give you a simpleexample.
If Oreos are in your house, andthey're always in my house, but
if Oreos are in your house,sooner or later, willpower is
going to break.
I don't care who you are, howfucking motivated you feel
today, eventually a stressfulmoment, a late night, something
will wear you down and you'lleat the Oreos.
(08:22):
You know goddamn well what I'mtalking about.
But if the Oreos aren't in thehouse, you don't have to fight.
You don't need willpower at allbecause the choice isn't even
there.
That's what I mean by buildingsystems.
It's not about telling yourselfdon't eat cookies.
It's about creating anenvironment where the cookies
aren't even an option.
One system removes the battlecompletely.
(08:45):
And the same is true foreverything else.
If you keep water on your desk,you'll drink more water.
If you schedule a 15-minutewalk after lunch, it just
becomes routine.
If you plan tomorrow's mealsthe night before, you don't burn
decision-making energy whenyou're hungry.
Each one of those shifts makesthe healthy choice the easy
(09:06):
choice, and it removes the needto constantly lean on willpower.
That's why relying ondiscipline alone is a setup for
failure.
It's not that you're weak, it'sno one can live their entire
life on the edge of restraint.
Sooner or later, the tank runsdry.
The solution isn't morewillpower, the solution is
(09:26):
better systems.
I'm going to show you exactlywhy diets ignore that and how
you can start building the kindof systems that make success
automatic.
So here's the real reason thatdiets fail.
Look, we've already establishedthat willpower is finite.
So let's look at why diets failalmost every single time.
(09:46):
At their core, diets are builton restriction.
They tell you what you can'teat, what you must avoid, what's
now off limits.
They create endless rules (09:55):
no carbs, no sugar, no fat, no
eating after seven.
The list goes on and on and onand on.
And what does that really mean?
It means you're constantlyliving in a state of
self-denial, forcing yourself toresist, to push, to fight day
after day, meal after meal.
And honestly, that's animpossible way to live.
(10:16):
Most people can white knuckleit for a little while.
I did hundreds of times ondiets, maybe for a few weeks,
maybe even a couple months, andyou drop some weight, you feel
like, hey, I'm on track.
But sooner or later, shithappens.
Stress, work, travel, familyobligation, night out, a tough
week, whatever it is.
And suddenly the rules crack.
(10:37):
The cravings win, the dietcollapses, and the weight comes
back.
And then comes the guilt.
People think it's their fault.
They think, I should have beenstronger, I should have had more
willpower.
But here's the truth it's notyour fault, it's the system.
Diets are designed to fail.
If they actually worked longterm, the industry wouldn't be
worth $70 billion.
(10:58):
They'd lose customers.
So instead, they keep peopletrapped in this endless loop of
short-term success and long-termfrustration.
The failure is what keeps youcoming back.
And every time you return, youspend more money, more energy,
and more hope.
So the problem isn't you, theproblem is restriction.
Because here's the reality: nobody wants to live a life (11:19):
undefined
where they're constantlyfighting food, constantly saying
no, constantly relying onwillpower to survive every
single meal.
That's not sustainable.
And anything that's notsustainable will eventually
fail.
That's the real reason dietsdon't work.
They're not designed to helpyou build a life you can
(11:41):
actually live.
They're designed to keep youhooked.
And that's why, if you wantreal change, you need a
completely different approach.
One that isn't aboutrestriction, but about freedom.
One that isn't aboutpunishment, but about design.
One that isn't about dieting atall, but it's about choosing.
(12:01):
That's why my mantra is stopdieting and start choosing.
So if willpower isn't theanswer and diets are designed to
fail, what actually works?
Well, it comes down to thisdesign over discipline.
What I mean by that is simple.
You don't need more grit, youdon't need to become a robot.
What you need is an environmentand a system that makes the
(12:22):
right choices automatic.
When the environment is set upfor success, the choices take
care of themselves.
Just think about any part ofyour life or business.
Do you rely on willpower to payyour bills?
Of course not.
You set up auto pay.
Do you rely on discipline tomake sure you show up to
meetings?
No.
You have a calendar withreminders.
You use systems to makeimportant things automatic.
(12:45):
And your health should be nodifferent.
If you're relying on purewillpower, you will eventually
lose.
But if you build systems, thehealthy choice becomes a default
choice.
And suddenly you don't needdiscipline anymore.
So, what does that really looklike in practice?
Let me give you a coupleexamples that I not only teach,
(13:07):
but that I actually live by.
I do this shit.
I'm not some Instagram jerk offthat never lost weight.
I lost 140 pounds and kept itoff for over two years.
So first thing, this should beobviously obvious, but stock the
house with better food.
If you fill your pantry withchips, cookies, and ice cream,
you're gonna eventually eatthem.
I don't care how strong youthink you are, I don't care how
(13:29):
strong I thought I was, at somepoint, stress will win.
But if you're stocking out withfruit and veggies and lean
protein and snacks that alignwith your goals, you don't have
to fight the temptation.
The temptation isn't eventhere.
Second thing is make water yourdefault drink.
Soda, fancy coffee, they'recalorie bombs disguised as
(13:50):
refreshments.
Make water your default.
Keep a bottle of water at yourdesk, in your car, in your bag,
wherever you go.
If water is the first thing yougrab, you're actually making a
small, smart choice thatcompounds every single day.
And number three, and I didn'tdo this until later on, but put
walking meetings on yourcalendar.
I coach executives who spendall day calls.
(14:12):
I tell them, swap one seatedZoom call for a walking call.
Just one.
That's it.
15 minutes of movement thatdoesn't cost you time.
It just requires a littledesign.
And then the last one is planinstead of react.
If you plan tomorrow's mealstonight, you don't have to think
about it when you're hungry andtired.
You just follow the plan.
That's design, not discipline.
And let me be clear (14:34):
I'm not talking about meal prep.
I'm not talking about make shittonight.
No, just think about okay,tomorrow I'm gonna have this,
this, and this.
And then have those things.
All the decision, all thechoice, everything is taken out
of it, and it just becomes anautomatic thing.
So plan instead of react.
Here is, I guess, the part thatmost people underestimate the
(14:56):
power of stacking small wins.
Everyone wants a big dramaticchange, lose 30 pounds in 30
days, drop three dress sizes insix weeks.
But all that all or nothingthinking is exactly what causes
burnout.
What actually works?
Tiny wins stacked over time,one 15-minute walk, one swap
water instead of soda, onehome-cooked meal instead of
(15:18):
takeout.
Each of those feels small inthe moment.
You might even think, well,this won't make a difference.
That's what I thought until Istarted doing it.
But here's the secret (15:25):
they do compound.
Just like investing money,small deposits over time turn
into massive gains.
And again, that's exactly how Ilost the 140 pounds and how I
keep it off.
So if you're new here, justI'll give you a quick overview.
When I was 411 pounds, I usedto believe the same lie that if
I just tried harder, if I justhad more willpower, I'd lose the
(15:49):
weight.
And time after time, I failed.
The breakthrough came when Istopped trying to force
discipline and startedredesigning my life.
I didn't overhaul everything atonce.
I didn't wake up one day andturn into a fitness junkie.
To this day, a couple yearslater, I still have not been to
the gym other than to maybe usethe bathroom.
Or I got a massage there once,but I don't go to the gym.
(16:10):
I'm not a fitness junkie.
I just made one small, smartchoice.
And then I made another andthen another.
Things that I did, I swappedsoda for water.
I started walking like a yearinto my journey, not hours a
day, but just 10 minutes atfirst, and I began building
momentum.
I started planning a few mealsinstead of grabbing whatever was
fastest, and I stacked thosewins.
(16:32):
Over time, those small, smartchoices added up to 140 pounds
gone.
And more importantly, theyadded up to a system I could
sustain for life.
I didn't get stronger, I didn'tget more willpower.
I didn't get more discipline.
I got smarter.
And that's exactly howhigh-performing people run their
(16:53):
businesses.
They don't rely on workingharder forever.
They build systems, they createprocesses, they remove
friction, they design forsuccess.
Health works exactly the sameway.
If you design your environment,your pantry, your schedule,
your routines, so the goodchoices, the easy ones, you'll
win.
You don't need to be perfect.
You just need to keep stackingthose small wins.
(17:15):
So I'm gonna just give you likea little recap here so you know
where we are.
Willpower is finite.
Diets force you to live onrestriction, and that's why they
fail.
The alternative is design overdiscipline.
Build systems, remove friction,and make good choices
automatic.
(17:36):
And then stack small, smartwins until they compound into
massive results.
That's the path out of thecycle.
No gimmicks, no quick fixes, nowoo-woo on Instagram, no
endless willpower battles.
This is the method that helpedme lose 140 pounds and keep it
off.
And it's the same method youcan use to finally get free.
(17:59):
Because the truth is, you don'tneed another fucking diet.
You don't need more willpower.
You just need to startdesigning your life in a way
that makes success inevitable.
And that starts today with onesmall, smart choice.
So here's something I want youto think about.
Every successful part of yourlife already runs on systems,
(18:20):
not willpower.
You don't get your paycheckjust because you remembered to
ask for it.
It's automated through payroll.
You don't manage your householdby sheer grit.
You have routines.
Trash goes out on Tuesday, kidsget picked up from school at a
certain time, dinner is usuallyaround the same time.
That rhythm makes things work.
Now imagine if you tried to runyour life with additive
(18:42):
systems.
Bills paid only when youremember, laundry done only when
you felt motivated,appointments kept only if you
had the willpower to show up.
That's total fucking chaos.
But that's exactly how mostpeople approach weight loss.
Pure grit, pure willpower, andno structure.
And then they wonder why itfalls apart.
The truth is, health worksexactly the same way as
(19:04):
everything else in your life.
Success comes from design, notdiscipline.
Instead of constantly forcingyourself to resist temptation,
you build routines that removethe friction.
Instead of trying to staystrong, you make it easier to
win.
That's how you create momentum.
So for example, if your phonecalendar reminds you to stand up
(19:25):
and stretch, you don't have torely on remembering.
If you keep a grocery listready and stick to it, you avoid
wandering the aisles grabbingwhatever's convenient.
If you set a bedtime routine,you stop sabotaging yourself
with late night exhaustioneating.
None of that requires beingtougher.
It just requires setting upyour life so the right decision
(19:46):
is a natural one.
And the beautiful part of allthis, once you've built even a
few of these systems, the effortdrops dramatically.
What feels impossible at firstbecomes automatic.
The energy you used to waste onconstant self-control is freed
up for actually living yourlife.
So stop beating the shit out ofyourself for not having enough
(20:07):
discipline.
You don't need to be asuperhero.
You just need to treat yourhealth like every other part of
your life that already works.
Put systems in place and letthe structure carry you.
Because at the end of the day,it's not about getting stronger,
it's about getting smarter.
So I know I've said it a bunchof times, but here's the truth.
(20:28):
You don't need to grind harder,you don't need to be tougher,
you don't need to wait untilJanuary or Monday or whatever
life finally slows down.
What you need to do is startmaking choices that actually fit
into your real life.
That might mean keeping a pieceof fruit in your car so the
drive-thru isn't your onlyoption.
It might mean laying out yoursneakers at night so a short
(20:48):
walk in the morning feelsautomatic.
It might mean cooking an extraportion of dinner so tomorrow's
lunch is already done instead ofgrabbing whatever's fastest.
These aren't heroic acts ofdiscipline.
They're small systems, littlenudges that tilt the scale in
your favor.
And over time, they add up tomassive results.
That's how I lost the weight.
Not with a magical burst ofwillpower, but by stacking
(21:12):
small, smart choices that workedwith my life, not against it.
So let me leave you with thisquestion.
What's one thing that you canchange today?
I don't mean next month, notnext year, but one thing that
you can change today that willmake the healthy choice the
easier one for you tomorrow.
Because that's a secret.
It's not about waiting formotivation, it's about creating
(21:34):
momentum.
If you're ready to take thenext step, I've got a few
resources to help keep yougoing.
You can grab my free weeklytips at
jonathanwrestle.com/slash freetips.
Every week I'll send you onesmall, smart choice that
actually works in the realworld.
Take you less than a minute.
I'm not going to spam you witha bunch of shit.
It's just a free tip withnothing else attached to it.
If you haven't yet, I stronglysuggest you check out my episode
(21:58):
on the seasonal diet trap.
You'll see exactly how theindustry profits from keeping
you stuck.
I'll put a link to it in theshow notes just so you have it.
And if you want the fullframework to change my life,
grab my book.
It's on Amazon.
We're an Amazon bestseller.
It's called Shut Up and Choose.
Honestly, it's a blueprint thatI wish I had when I was stuck,
(22:18):
but I didn't.
So I wrote it because I'mrallying against the $70 billion
diet industry.
I think they do everything theycan to keep as many people
stuck and hooked.
Don't get me started on Azepicand the GLP ones.
They have a place, but it'snothing more than Weight
Watchers in a syringe.
So the reality is you have tostop waiting and start choosing
(22:40):
because your life doesn't beginagain in January.
It begins the moment you decideto make that first small smart
choice.
So enough of the excuses andthinking you need more
discipline.
All you really need to do isshut up and choose.
Announcer (23:02):
Jonathan's passion is to share his journey of
shedding 130 pounds in less thana year without any of the usual
gimmicks.
No diets, no pills, and we'lllet you in on a little secret.
No fucking gym.
And guess what?
You can do it too.
We hope you enjoyed the show.
(23:23):
We had a fucking blast.
If you did, make sure to like,rate, and review.
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, find Jonathan on
Instagram at JonathanWrestlerBocaraton.
Until next time, shut up andchoose.
If you're a whiny snowflake that can't handle the
truth, is offended by the wordfuck and about 37 uses of it in
different forms, gets ass hurtwhen you hear someone speak the
absolute real and raw truth, youshould leave.
Like right now.
This is Shut Up and Shoes.
(00:22):
The podcast where we cutthrough the shit and get real
about weight loss, life, andeverything in between, we get
into the nitty-gritty of makingsmall, smart choices that add up
to big results.
From what's on your plate andhow you approach life's
challenges, we'll explore howthe simple act of choosing
(00:43):
differently can transform yourhealth, your mindset, and your
entire freaking life.
So, if you're ready to cutthrough the bullshit and start
making some real changes, thenbuckle up and shut it up,
because we're about to chooseour way to a healthier, happier
life.
This is Shut Up and Choose.
(01:04):
Let's do this.
Now your host, JonathanRessler.
Jonathan (01:13):
Hey, welcome back to Shut Up and Choose, the podcast
that cuts into noise andnonsense, and all the bullshit
$70 billion guidance are on yourway.
All those Instagram influencersand internet jerk-offs that are
telling you how to lose weightwho really don't have a clue.
They're just pitching thelatest and greatest, the newest,
and what they deem to be themost exciting thing, but the
truth is they have no clue.
(01:35):
In fact, they always talk aboutwillpower and discipline and
motivation, and all those thingsare a bunch of shit.
So if you think you fail theweight loss because you don't
have enough willpower, you'vebeen lied to.
Let me say it again, becauseit's probably the most important
thing you'll hear all week.
If you believe the reason youcan't lose weight is because
(01:55):
you're weak or lazy or don'thave enough discipline, that's
just not the truth.
That's the story that the $70billion diet industry wants you
to believe.
Here's how the game reallyworks they sell you a plan, a
program, a product, somethingbuilt around restriction,
extreme rules, or totallyunrealistic demands.
(02:16):
And when it inevitably fails,when you burn out, when you give
into cravings, or you fall offthe wagon, they don't take the
blame.
No, they point the finger rightback at you.
Hey, you didn't try hardenough, or you weren't
disciplined enough, or you don'thave enough willpower.
And what do you do?
You feel guilty.
You blame yourself, and thenyou go back and buy the next
(02:39):
program.
That's how the cycle repeatsyear after year.
If you think about it, it'sgenius marketing.
They make billions, but it'sterrible for your health, your
confidence, and your peace ofmind.
Because here's the truthwillpower has nothing to do with
long-term weight loss.
Think about it.
How many areas of your lifealready demand your willpower?
(03:01):
If you're a busy executive,your entire day is filled with
decisions, responsibilities,deadlines, and fires to put out.
By the time you get home, yourwillpower is shot.
You don't have the bandwidth towhite knuckle your way through
another diet.
And you shouldn't have to.
The real reasons diets failisn't because you're weak, it's
because they're designed tofail.
(03:22):
They depend on constantdiscipline, and discipline is a
finite resource.
Eventually, it just runs out.
So if willpower isn't theanswer, what is?
Well, that's what I'm going todive into today.
I'm going to show you the truthabout why discipline isn't the
key to lasting weight loss andwhat actually worked instead.
I'll break down for you how Ipersonally lost 140 pounds and
(03:44):
kept it off without relying onwillpower and how you can
finally escape the cycle thediet industry wants to keep you
trapped in.
So let me get into it.
So let's talk about willpower.
For decades, weight loss hasbeen sold to us as a simple
equation.
If you want it badly enough, ifyou're strict enough, if you're
disciplined enough, you'llsucceed.
(04:05):
The message is always the same.
Just try harder.
On the surface, it soundsreasonable, I guess.
People love simple answers.
Eat less, move more.
Stop being weak.
Power through.
It's packaged in tough lovelanguage that makes you think,
yeah, well, maybe I really dojust need to buckle down.
The problem with that is itdoesn't work.
(04:27):
Here's why.
Willpower is finite.
Every decision you make duringthe day, every stressful moment,
every demand on your timedrains that tank.
By the time you've made itthrough meetings and deadlines
and family obligations andeverything else that life throws
at you, how much willpower doyou think you realistically have
left to fight cravings, resisttemptation, or stick to some
(04:49):
punishing diet plan?
I know you know the answer, andit's not much.
And if you're like me, mostnights it felt like I had zero
left in the tank.
I can't tell you how many timesI've personally tried harder.
I told myself this time wouldbe different.
I know every single one of youlistening has said that.
I'd white knuckle my waythrough, I'd be stricter,
(05:12):
tougher, and more disciplined,and for a little while it
worked.
I follow the rules, I cut thecalories, I dropped some weight,
but eventually, every fuckingtime, I caved.
It wasn't because I didn't wantit enough, it wasn't because I
was weak.
It was because no one cansustain a life built on constant
self-denial and discipline.
(05:32):
Eventually, you get tired, yougive in, and then you start the
cycle all over again.
And here's the kicker.
The diet industry counts onthat.
That's exactly how they profit.
They build plans that requiresuperhuman levels of willpower.
When you can't sustain it, theydon't admit the system is
(05:53):
broken.
They tell you that you'rebroken.
They point the finger rightback at you.
You didn't try hard enough, youweren't disciplined enough, you
didn't have the willpower.
And because you believe them,you feel guilty.
You think it's your fault.
And then what do you do?
You go back, pull out yourwallet, and buy the next fucking
plan.
That's why the industry makes$70 billion a year.
(06:16):
Not because they're creatinglasting results, but because
they've convinced you thatfailure is your fault, and their
next solution is exactly whatyou need.
But let me tell you fromexperience, you don't need more
willpower.
You don't need more discipline.
You don't need to be tougher,you need a different approach
(06:37):
altogether.
And that's what we're going totalk about.
What actually works whenwillpower runs out, and how you
can build systems and choicesthat don't depend on constant
grit.
So, first thing is you have tounderstand this.
I've said it three times.
Willpower is finite.
It's not an unlimited resourceyou can call in anytime you want
(06:57):
to.
Every decision you makethroughout the day drains it.
What to wear, how to handlemeeting, what's in an email, how
to deal with a crisis, add instress and deadlines, traffic,
family issues, all that shitchips away your mental energy.
By the time you're staring atthe fridge at 7:30 at night,
your tank is empty.
You're not choosing betweendiscipline and weakness.
You're choosing with nothingleft to give.
(07:20):
This is especially true ifyou're a busy executive.
The people that I coach, theseare high-performed men and women
who run companies, lead teams,and make hundreds of decisions
every day.
Their willpower is alreadymaxed out before they even get
home.
And then, what do most dietsdemand?
That they summon even morewillpower to weigh food, to
count calories, and resistcravings.
(07:42):
That's a losing battle beforeit even starts.
And research backs this up.
The people who succeed atlong-term weight loss aren't the
ones with the strongestdiscipline.
They're the ones who designtheir environment so they don't
need discipline in the firstplace.
They remove the friction, theymake good choices, automatic,
and they rely on systems, notgrit.
(08:02):
So let me give you a simpleexample.
If Oreos are in your house, andthey're always in my house, but
if Oreos are in your house,sooner or later, willpower is
going to break.
I don't care who you are, howfucking motivated you feel
today, eventually a stressfulmoment, a late night, something
will wear you down and you'lleat the Oreos.
(08:22):
You know goddamn well what I'mtalking about.
But if the Oreos aren't in thehouse, you don't have to fight.
You don't need willpower at allbecause the choice isn't even
there.
That's what I mean by buildingsystems.
It's not about telling yourselfdon't eat cookies.
It's about creating anenvironment where the cookies
aren't even an option.
One system removes the battlecompletely.
(08:45):
And the same is true foreverything else.
If you keep water on your desk,you'll drink more water.
If you schedule a 15-minutewalk after lunch, it just
becomes routine.
If you plan tomorrow's mealsthe night before, you don't burn
decision-making energy whenyou're hungry.
Each one of those shifts makesthe healthy choice the easy
(09:06):
choice, and it removes the needto constantly lean on willpower.
That's why relying ondiscipline alone is a setup for
failure.
It's not that you're weak, it'sno one can live their entire
life on the edge of restraint.
Sooner or later, the tank runsdry.
The solution isn't morewillpower, the solution is
(09:26):
better systems.
I'm going to show you exactlywhy diets ignore that and how
you can start building the kindof systems that make success
automatic.
So here's the real reason thatdiets fail.
Look, we've already establishedthat willpower is finite.
So let's look at why diets failalmost every single time.
(09:46):
At their core, diets are builton restriction.
They tell you what you can'teat, what you must avoid, what's
now off limits.
They create endless rules (09:55):
no carbs, no sugar, no fat, no
eating after seven.
The list goes on and on and onand on.
And what does that really mean?
It means you're constantlyliving in a state of
self-denial, forcing yourself toresist, to push, to fight day
after day, meal after meal.
And honestly, that's animpossible way to live.
(10:16):
Most people can white knuckleit for a little while.
I did hundreds of times ondiets, maybe for a few weeks,
maybe even a couple months, andyou drop some weight, you feel
like, hey, I'm on track.
But sooner or later, shithappens.
Stress, work, travel, familyobligation, night out, a tough
week, whatever it is.
And suddenly the rules crack.
(10:37):
The cravings win, the dietcollapses, and the weight comes
back.
And then comes the guilt.
People think it's their fault.
They think, I should have beenstronger, I should have had more
willpower.
But here's the truth it's notyour fault, it's the system.
Diets are designed to fail.
If they actually worked longterm, the industry wouldn't be
worth $70 billion.
(10:58):
They'd lose customers.
So instead, they keep peopletrapped in this endless loop of
short-term success and long-termfrustration.
The failure is what keeps youcoming back.
And every time you return, youspend more money, more energy,
and more hope.
So the problem isn't you, theproblem is restriction.
Because here's the reality: nobody wants to live a life (11:19):
undefined
where they're constantlyfighting food, constantly saying
no, constantly relying onwillpower to survive every
single meal.
That's not sustainable.
And anything that's notsustainable will eventually
fail.
That's the real reason dietsdon't work.
They're not designed to helpyou build a life you can
(11:41):
actually live.
They're designed to keep youhooked.
And that's why, if you wantreal change, you need a
completely different approach.
One that isn't aboutrestriction, but about freedom.
One that isn't aboutpunishment, but about design.
One that isn't about dieting atall, but it's about choosing.
(12:01):
That's why my mantra is stopdieting and start choosing.
So if willpower isn't theanswer and diets are designed to
fail, what actually works?
Well, it comes down to thisdesign over discipline.
What I mean by that is simple.
You don't need more grit, youdon't need to become a robot.
What you need is an environmentand a system that makes the
(12:22):
right choices automatic.
When the environment is set upfor success, the choices take
care of themselves.
Just think about any part ofyour life or business.
Do you rely on willpower to payyour bills?
Of course not.
You set up auto pay.
Do you rely on discipline tomake sure you show up to
meetings?
No.
You have a calendar withreminders.
You use systems to makeimportant things automatic.
(12:45):
And your health should be nodifferent.
If you're relying on purewillpower, you will eventually
lose.
But if you build systems, thehealthy choice becomes a default
choice.
And suddenly you don't needdiscipline anymore.
So, what does that really looklike in practice?
Let me give you a coupleexamples that I not only teach,
(13:07):
but that I actually live by.
I do this shit.
I'm not some Instagram jerk offthat never lost weight.
I lost 140 pounds and kept itoff for over two years.
So first thing, this should beobviously obvious, but stock the
house with better food.
If you fill your pantry withchips, cookies, and ice cream,
you're gonna eventually eatthem.
I don't care how strong youthink you are, I don't care how
(13:29):
strong I thought I was, at somepoint, stress will win.
But if you're stocking out withfruit and veggies and lean
protein and snacks that alignwith your goals, you don't have
to fight the temptation.
The temptation isn't eventhere.
Second thing is make water yourdefault drink.
Soda, fancy coffee, they'recalorie bombs disguised as
(13:50):
refreshments.
Make water your default.
Keep a bottle of water at yourdesk, in your car, in your bag,
wherever you go.
If water is the first thing yougrab, you're actually making a
small, smart choice thatcompounds every single day.
And number three, and I didn'tdo this until later on, but put
walking meetings on yourcalendar.
I coach executives who spendall day calls.
(14:12):
I tell them, swap one seatedZoom call for a walking call.
Just one.
That's it.
15 minutes of movement thatdoesn't cost you time.
It just requires a littledesign.
And then the last one is planinstead of react.
If you plan tomorrow's mealstonight, you don't have to think
about it when you're hungry andtired.
You just follow the plan.
That's design, not discipline.
And let me be clear (14:34):
I'm not talking about meal prep.
I'm not talking about make shittonight.
No, just think about okay,tomorrow I'm gonna have this,
this, and this.
And then have those things.
All the decision, all thechoice, everything is taken out
of it, and it just becomes anautomatic thing.
So plan instead of react.
Here is, I guess, the part thatmost people underestimate the
(14:56):
power of stacking small wins.
Everyone wants a big dramaticchange, lose 30 pounds in 30
days, drop three dress sizes insix weeks.
But all that all or nothingthinking is exactly what causes
burnout.
What actually works?
Tiny wins stacked over time,one 15-minute walk, one swap
water instead of soda, onehome-cooked meal instead of
(15:18):
takeout.
Each of those feels small inthe moment.
You might even think, well,this won't make a difference.
That's what I thought until Istarted doing it.
But here's the secret (15:25):
they do compound.
Just like investing money,small deposits over time turn
into massive gains.
And again, that's exactly how Ilost the 140 pounds and how I
keep it off.
So if you're new here, justI'll give you a quick overview.
When I was 411 pounds, I usedto believe the same lie that if
I just tried harder, if I justhad more willpower, I'd lose the
(15:49):
weight.
And time after time, I failed.
The breakthrough came when Istopped trying to force
discipline and startedredesigning my life.
I didn't overhaul everything atonce.
I didn't wake up one day andturn into a fitness junkie.
To this day, a couple yearslater, I still have not been to
the gym other than to maybe usethe bathroom.
Or I got a massage there once,but I don't go to the gym.
(16:10):
I'm not a fitness junkie.
I just made one small, smartchoice.
And then I made another andthen another.
Things that I did, I swappedsoda for water.
I started walking like a yearinto my journey, not hours a
day, but just 10 minutes atfirst, and I began building
momentum.
I started planning a few mealsinstead of grabbing whatever was
fastest, and I stacked thosewins.
(16:32):
Over time, those small, smartchoices added up to 140 pounds
gone.
And more importantly, theyadded up to a system I could
sustain for life.
I didn't get stronger, I didn'tget more willpower.
I didn't get more discipline.
I got smarter.
And that's exactly howhigh-performing people run their
(16:53):
businesses.
They don't rely on workingharder forever.
They build systems, they createprocesses, they remove
friction, they design forsuccess.
Health works exactly the sameway.
If you design your environment,your pantry, your schedule,
your routines, so the goodchoices, the easy ones, you'll
win.
You don't need to be perfect.
You just need to keep stackingthose small wins.
(17:15):
So I'm gonna just give you likea little recap here so you know
where we are.
Willpower is finite.
Diets force you to live onrestriction, and that's why they
fail.
The alternative is design overdiscipline.
Build systems, remove friction,and make good choices
automatic.
(17:36):
And then stack small, smartwins until they compound into
massive results.
That's the path out of thecycle.
No gimmicks, no quick fixes, nowoo-woo on Instagram, no
endless willpower battles.
This is the method that helpedme lose 140 pounds and keep it
off.
And it's the same method youcan use to finally get free.
(17:59):
Because the truth is, you don'tneed another fucking diet.
You don't need more willpower.
You just need to startdesigning your life in a way
that makes success inevitable.
And that starts today with onesmall, smart choice.
So here's something I want youto think about.
Every successful part of yourlife already runs on systems,
(18:20):
not willpower.
You don't get your paycheckjust because you remembered to
ask for it.
It's automated through payroll.
You don't manage your householdby sheer grit.
You have routines.
Trash goes out on Tuesday, kidsget picked up from school at a
certain time, dinner is usuallyaround the same time.
That rhythm makes things work.
Now imagine if you tried to runyour life with additive
(18:42):
systems.
Bills paid only when youremember, laundry done only when
you felt motivated,appointments kept only if you
had the willpower to show up.
That's total fucking chaos.
But that's exactly how mostpeople approach weight loss.
Pure grit, pure willpower, andno structure.
And then they wonder why itfalls apart.
The truth is, health worksexactly the same way as
(19:04):
everything else in your life.
Success comes from design, notdiscipline.
Instead of constantly forcingyourself to resist temptation,
you build routines that removethe friction.
Instead of trying to staystrong, you make it easier to
win.
That's how you create momentum.
So for example, if your phonecalendar reminds you to stand up
(19:25):
and stretch, you don't have torely on remembering.
If you keep a grocery listready and stick to it, you avoid
wandering the aisles grabbingwhatever's convenient.
If you set a bedtime routine,you stop sabotaging yourself
with late night exhaustioneating.
None of that requires beingtougher.
It just requires setting upyour life so the right decision
(19:46):
is a natural one.
And the beautiful part of allthis, once you've built even a
few of these systems, the effortdrops dramatically.
What feels impossible at firstbecomes automatic.
The energy you used to waste onconstant self-control is freed
up for actually living yourlife.
So stop beating the shit out ofyourself for not having enough
(20:07):
discipline.
You don't need to be asuperhero.
You just need to treat yourhealth like every other part of
your life that already works.
Put systems in place and letthe structure carry you.
Because at the end of the day,it's not about getting stronger,
it's about getting smarter.
So I know I've said it a bunchof times, but here's the truth.
(20:28):
You don't need to grind harder,you don't need to be tougher,
you don't need to wait untilJanuary or Monday or whatever
life finally slows down.
What you need to do is startmaking choices that actually fit
into your real life.
That might mean keeping a pieceof fruit in your car so the
drive-thru isn't your onlyoption.
It might mean laying out yoursneakers at night so a short
(20:48):
walk in the morning feelsautomatic.
It might mean cooking an extraportion of dinner so tomorrow's
lunch is already done instead ofgrabbing whatever's fastest.
These aren't heroic acts ofdiscipline.
They're small systems, littlenudges that tilt the scale in
your favor.
And over time, they add up tomassive results.
That's how I lost the weight.
Not with a magical burst ofwillpower, but by stacking
(21:12):
small, smart choices that workedwith my life, not against it.
So let me leave you with thisquestion.
What's one thing that you canchange today?
I don't mean next month, notnext year, but one thing that
you can change today that willmake the healthy choice the
easier one for you tomorrow.
Because that's a secret.
It's not about waiting formotivation, it's about creating
(21:34):
momentum.
If you're ready to take thenext step, I've got a few
resources to help keep yougoing.
You can grab my free weeklytips at
jonathanwrestle.com/slash freetips.
Every week I'll send you onesmall, smart choice that
actually works in the realworld.
Take you less than a minute.
I'm not going to spam you witha bunch of shit.
It's just a free tip withnothing else attached to it.
If you haven't yet, I stronglysuggest you check out my episode
(21:58):
on the seasonal diet trap.
You'll see exactly how theindustry profits from keeping
you stuck.
I'll put a link to it in theshow notes just so you have it.
And if you want the fullframework to change my life,
grab my book.
It's on Amazon.
We're an Amazon bestseller.
It's called Shut Up and Choose.
Honestly, it's a blueprint thatI wish I had when I was stuck,
(22:18):
but I didn't.
So I wrote it because I'mrallying against the $70 billion
diet industry.
I think they do everything theycan to keep as many people
stuck and hooked.
Don't get me started on Azepicand the GLP ones.
They have a place, but it'snothing more than Weight
Watchers in a syringe.
So the reality is you have tostop waiting and start choosing
(22:40):
because your life doesn't beginagain in January.
It begins the moment you decideto make that first small smart
choice.
So enough of the excuses andthinking you need more
discipline.
All you really need to do isshut up and choose.
Announcer (23:02):
Jonathan's passion is to share his journey of
shedding 130 pounds in less thana year without any of the usual
gimmicks.
No diets, no pills, and we'lllet you in on a little secret.
No fucking gym.
And guess what?
You can do it too.
We hope you enjoyed the show.
(23:23):
We had a fucking blast.
If you did, make sure to like,rate, and review.
We'll be back soon, but in themeantime, find Jonathan on
Instagram at JonathanWrestlerBocaraton.
Until next time, shut up andchoose.
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