Ep. 4.3 Busy and Fat

In this episode we get real- we find out the most opposite thing about each other, talk about what compells us to be or not to be busy, and in the Wheel World we really get into the meat of it on the covert pad controversy. 

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Episode Transcript

Rebel (00:00):
Hey what's up everybody?

(00:00):
Welcome to skate day. Yo,

Shove (00:12):
what's up?

Rebel (00:13):
It's the podcast where shove and rebel talk about
stuff. I'm rebel.

Shove (00:21):
I'm shove,

Rebel (00:22):
and together we are shovel.

Shove (00:24):
Can you dig it?

Rebel (00:26):
Yeah,

Shove (00:27):
I can't barely dig it today.

Rebel (00:29):
I'm having a hard time digging it today to I'll be
honest, it's

Shove (00:31):
about time or we'll have an off day. If you've been
listening to the beginning, youknow that I shove often. I'm
like, Well, it's the first timethis season literally like three
episodes. And I'm just like, dowe have to do this? I did not
want to do this emotionallyphysically. I just like my soul
does not want to be

Rebel (00:54):
I get it. I really didn't think I wanted to do it last
week, like record last week sothat it could go out this
Wednesday? Or were we busy likewhat happened last one really
busy

Shove (01:07):
got too late. So now we're recording today because
it's my weekly now. And thereason we probably both what
mostly me I could speak formyself don't want to be here is
because, um, we spent the wholeweekend in the sequoias and that
was like a four hour drivethere. photoshoot in like the
snow. And like it was just likea lot. It was very draining.

(01:31):
Literally, I just felt like Iwanted to shut down even during
an app. And then it was just alot. And then we just got home
today. And then it's likepodcast time. And it's just
like, I want to do nothing untilbecause tomorrow, the work day
work week and school week startsall over again.

Rebel (01:48):
Yeah, and I remember now why we didn't record it last
week. And it's because we hadjust got home from Phoenix from
the gym show. And I hadliterally one day before I then
left at like 6am to go toMaryland,

Shove (02:04):
which goes exactly into what the main things we'll be
talking about today, which isbeing busy, and why some people
feel the need to be busy. Rebel,and some people are like busy.
Why the fuck would I want to dothat? Me. So yeah, that's what
we'll be talking about. Andanyways, back to the intro. We

(02:25):
talked about or two rollerskaters who fell in love as you
know, and kind of talked abouteverything from the real world
to the real world. And I thinkwe're ready right now to jump
into the real world.

Rebel (02:36):
Yeah, let's go into the real world

Shove (02:52):
Oh real world tell

Rebel (02:54):
me how I completely forgot like half of our intro
was like, Alright, let's starttalking and shove was like maybe
we should complete the introfirst. Anyways,

Shove (03:06):
he will busy be we're talking about getting busy.
Yeah, keep on talking about whatyou were trying to talk about.
So

Rebel (03:11):
what I was gonna say was, let me just let me just preface
this whole episode. Because Ifeel like it's very fitting. And
the reason why is let me tellyou about the last week. So last
weekend, me and shove went toPhoenix to the Tucson gem show,
to pick up crystals for ourwedding and to visit our friend
Heather. And so we left onFriday, we drove out to the

(03:34):
Tucson gem show. We celebratedHeather's birthday with her on
Friday. On Saturday, we went toTucson gem show we were there
the whole day. And it was veryoverwhelming and very exciting
and awesome, but also likeoverwhelming, right. And then on
Sunday, we went to the skatepark and then we drove back
home. We arrived home prettylate on Sunday night. Then

(03:56):
Monday was like work andeverything. We had one day of
Monday and I had a bunch ofstuff to do. And then the next
day at 6am. I left on a flightto Maryland to do a gig with La
Roller Girls skating for thislike Southwest convention and

(04:19):
Seagrams and like all thisstuff. I was there Tuesday,
Wednesday, Thursday, flew backThursday morning. Well,
technically all day. Tuesday wasall day Tuesday it was flying
travel. Then we went out onTuesday night. Wednesday was a
performance and then all dayThursday was travel. I came back
I immediately started workingagain. And then Friday morning.

(04:44):
We left or Friday we left forthe sequoias to do our
engagement shoot. And, you knowtomorrow is and then we came
back Sunday. And then we haveMonday Tuesday Wednesday and on
Thursday. I leave for New Yorkfor a trip skating trip.

(05:05):
Anyways, I'm not usually thisbusy, but I just thought, oh my
god, wow, I really did it tomyself this time. But I do, for
the most part really enjoy beingbusy. Like if I'm not busy, we
get, you know, rebel not beingthe best human being in the
world. Right? We all rememberthe summer of 2018 this um, by

(05:28):
we all I mean me and shoveremember the summer of 2018,
which was a summer where idlehands found lots of trouble and
shove got mad at rebel a lotbecause I don't know what the
hell I was doing in the summer2018 But I wasn't doing anything
productive. And so that's,that's making nice of it. So

(05:52):
like, I do well, when I am busy.
Yeah, shove on the other hand.
What how do you feel about beingbusy?

Shove (06:00):
Um, I don't really like to be busy because it's so
draining on me mentally. I liketo do things here and there. I
don't like when things are backto back. I don't like doing
multiple things in one day.
Like, that doesn't sound fun atall to me. It's just like, I
want to chill. I have to knowahead of time what we're doing.
If it changes, I'm a littlebetter at like going with the

(06:25):
flow, but I don't want it to belike, bam, bam, bam. I don't
want to be Lady Gaga. I don'twant plane nother plane club.
Nothing like no sleep. No, no,no. But guess what? Ever since
I've been with this woman,that's what my life. My life
were like it's minus a pandemic,like hardcore pandemic year. Or

(06:45):
two, I'll say 2000 to 2001 2000to

Rebel (06:52):
2001.

Shove (06:55):
Feels like it's been 2120 to 2021. I would say, Oh my God,
how many years has it been?

Rebel (07:04):
We've been together for five years? Yeah, as of March
30. Yeah, technically,

Shove (07:09):
we're crazy. I was gonna say six years. But yeah, five.

Rebel (07:13):
We've known each other for six years, three years

Shove (07:15):
of my life has been chaos. So I'm, like, busy. And
it's funny, because like, peoplewill be like, Oh, we should hang
out. Or we should do this. Andwe oh my gosh, like Sorry, like,
this is happening. Or sorry,this is happening. I've checked
my calendar. I'm like eight outof the 10 things. And it will
make yourself busy. I'm like,It's not me. I'm just fell in

(07:38):
love with a busy person. Solike, sometimes it sucks,
because there are things thatlike, I miss out on doing that I
want to do. But a lot of thosethings are like worthwhile, like
this weekend. It's like, I waslooking forward to it for a long
time. And it was amazing. It wasfun. But then, of course, I
missed the rollout that I reallywanted to go to. But that took
and I thought it was going tobut it was like, Oh, I got the

(07:58):
dates mixed up. And that's likefine things happen. Or it's like
those little things like, oh,come over and let's do this. And
it's like, oh, no, I'm inArizona that weekend. Or oh,
we're doing who knows what.

Rebel (08:12):
What's crazy is I don't feel like we're that busy.

Shove (08:15):
I find your problem.

Rebel (08:16):
I don't know. I know, like in the back of my head.
Like I'm aware that we're busy.
But it's like doesn't feel likethat. To me. It feels like just
live in life.

Shove (08:27):
It took us like three, maybe four months to do an
interview on the skater itpodcasts. Why? Why did it take
that long? Because

Rebel (08:37):
we were so busy. But we're just

Shove (08:39):
not busy. No, I

Rebel (08:41):
know, we're busy. But I just feel like we just have a
life. Like we like do thingslike I one's

Shove (08:47):
life is like this.

Rebel (08:49):
I mean, I guess I've just always I've always done lots of
things. So I don't really knowwhat it's like to not do things.
Like what what was your lifelike? Like when it comes to like
doing things before me like whatdid you did you just were you
just like, I'm just gonna watchTV tonight. Or I

Shove (09:11):
would go to friends houses a lot. And we would
literally just chill and talk.
We would loiter at coffee shopsfor hours, sometimes talking. So
I'm just existing. It's a lot ofjust existing like when you
leave town. I like feel socentered and calm and peaceful.
I don't get bored. Like for me.
It takes a lot for me to be likeI'm bored. And I remember there

(09:33):
were times where I'd like Oh,well. I'm actually bored right
now. I think since I've beenwith you I've never been bored.
Remember last time I said I'm sobored right now and listen was
at work.

Rebel (09:42):
That's so funny. I literally said it the other day.

Shove (09:45):
Yeah, because you have to be stimulated nonstop.

Rebel (09:51):
Hmm. I don't think that's true. I think there are times
when I want to be like chill,

Shove (09:56):
because even a lot of times we have a movie on like
you're on your phone at the sametime. Yeah, because

Rebel (10:01):
sometimes it's not that interesting to me.

Shove (10:04):
Well, I think a lot of it has to do with your ADHD and a
lot of st with just yourpersonality. And like you like
for me, I love privacy. I lovesilence, like, even on the
drive, like, I was like, putmusic on my I was just like, no,
like, can't we just exist insilence. And she hated that. And
I just thought it was like abeautiful view. Like, let's just

(10:25):
take it in, like, for me, likesensory overload is real, like,
I can just like, like me, and mybest friend Haley can literally
just sit somewhere. Like, shecame over and played. Wow. And I
watched a show, and it wasgreat. We barely talked to each
other, we laugh and somethingfunny happened. And that was it.

(10:45):
We got food. And I was justlike, so nice. And it was just
like, not having to likeentertain, engage, or like, do
anything like, I don't know,

Rebel (10:55):
I do that a lot though.
Like, I do that so much of myday, like, almost every day I
sit in silence, or like dosomething in silos

Shove (11:05):
doing something No, like, you have to be a busy like you
make a list. Even on your offdays, there's always a list. So
you're not just existing, if youhave a list.

Rebel (11:15):
But how am I going to remember what to do next. If I
don't have a list

Shove (11:20):
not doing anything, means you don't have to do anything
that so doesn't matter if youforget something because there
is nothing to do that.

Rebel (11:26):
I don't understand that does just nothing to do zero.
That is like you don't need tocatch up on anything. Like you
don't have a project you want todo

Shove (11:35):
to like, I'm off tomorrow, you know, sleep in
Nice. And then you just sleepin, and then you lay there you
put on your phone, and then youjust sit and daydream. That's my
day. I daydream a lot. Likethat's why people might think
I'm just sitting there arestaring off MySpace, but I'm
daydreaming and then like,that's my entertainment. And
then I'll get like an idea like,oh, man, rad coffee, so I'm so

(11:58):
bummed right now. So then I'lldrive to get coffee. Maybe you
have a good day or like you'relike, I'm gonna get dressed up,
just get dressed up, get dressedup, go get coffee, get my
coffee, go for a drive, playsome good music. I like come
home cuddle with Bowie. Daydreamsome more and be like, Oh my
God, that show that don't evenwatch that. I know rebel. Like,
I should start watching that.
But add on, play on my phone alittle bit. Talk to Bowie. And

(12:21):
then I'm like, Oh, it's gettingpretty late. Guess I'll go to
bed. And that's a wonderful dayfor me.

Rebel (12:30):
I just feel like if that was my day, I would be like, I
feel like I wasted a day.

Shove (12:37):
Yeah, but that's the thing. You always feel like, Oh,
you have to do everything. Youhave to do everything. You got
to live life to fullest. Youshould be working on something.
Time is money. Gotta go go go.

Rebel (12:45):
But I don't think about it in the money's terms. Like I
actually like doing the thingsthat I do.

Shove (12:51):
No, I'm not saying like, literally like, like that
attitude.

Rebel (12:55):
Interesting. Okay, so I don't even know what to ask. So
I guess, i i value busyness or I

Shove (13:08):
see I see it as a bad thing. Like when we're like,
like, for me, it's like, Oh, I'mso busy. Like, I'm busy. I have
so much debt. You're like, oh mygod, we have so many things to
do. Like, oh my god, it'd be sofun. We have so many activities
planned, like all of that. Andfor me, it's just like, oh my
god, we have so much to do. Andthen there's like those
activities we have to do likeblah blah, like when am I gonna

(13:30):
have time to rest? And for youjust you see it as a positive I
see it as a negative.

Rebel (13:36):
Oh, that's super interesting. I think that might
be the most opposite thing aboutus.

Shove (13:42):
Well, because like when I am too busy, it's like also the
fear because it's like, I knowwhat's going to follow being
busy, like, my depression canget activated triggered like I
want to shut down I don't I wantto be completely alone. Like, I
don't want to be touched at all.
I don't want to have to talk toanyone. I don't like I just want
to like be in a cave becauseit's just too much for me like
so if I don't have that time tojust exist in silence or like

(14:05):
not have to worry aboutanything. i It's like my I get
overworked. Like, completely seeI

Rebel (14:14):
understand that feeling though because like for example
this last week, that is not atypical week for me that was way
too busy. And several timesthroughout the week I exhibited
that same like signs of way overstimulation away over too busy,
and like kind of shut down andlike did not have a great mental

(14:35):
week because of it. Typically, Idon't take three trips during
one week. That's just the waythe cookie crumbles this last
week, but I also feel like forme, I they're like to do list
items that are like work,obviously. And then there's to
do list items that are likefulfilling to me. And like even

(14:58):
if I was to have like an appSaluton nothing day, like a spa
day or something where I didn'tthink about anything I would
want to, like, make a list ofall of the things that I wanted
to do for self care day. Youknow, Amy, like how would want
to be like, shower? Like, don'tforget to paint your nails or

(15:19):
like, see, like

Shove (15:20):
when you were gone, and I was like, sitting here and then
I was like, Oh yeah, I've beenwanting to like get myself a
pedicure. So I went ahead anddid that. But it wasn't like on
a list. It was just like, whatpops in my head?

Rebel (15:32):
Oh, I, you don't have 800 million things going on in your
head all the time, though.

Shove (15:37):
My 100 million things are things about like horrible
things will happen. Like, ifrebel dies tomorrow, I wouldn't
know how to access anything orknow how to handle anything. And
I'll think it all the waythrough. And then I'm like, that
will go on to another thing. Andthen I think about like my dad
like how he's getting older whenhe dies? And and how am I gonna
handle that? What am I gonna dowith the motorcycle? What am I

(15:59):
doing with this car will barelymake it to the wedding and a lot
of things about death a lotabout things, all emergencies.
Just like in general, like myanxieties, like, I don't think
about what I'm gonna do for theday, I think about what's gonna
happen in life. Like, I have athing and scenarios, like my
mind is full of scenarios ofhorrible things happening. And

(16:22):
memories and flashbacks andtrauma. That's what happens.

Rebel (16:26):
That sounds like a terrible place to be.

Shove (16:28):
Yeah, that's why and then like, all those go on fire, when
it's when I'm stressed. They gohider.

Rebel (16:34):
That sounds awful. I'm so sorry. That that's what's
happening in your head all thetime.

Shove (16:42):
pretty often. That's why I try to like I'll daydream
about like positive thingssometimes, which is nice. But
then my mind will go to otherplaces. Oh, usually, if I'm
stressed, like if I'm like,overworked or whatever. And then
I'm like, my anxiety kicks in,and then those go up. But
lately, the one that's been onmy head a lot is about like, oh,

(17:02):
like, if she dies, like I'mfucked, like I don't know, where
and how to access anything. Andan important information like
she has all that information,because it's like, you're the
one that relationship theyhandle that. And then I was
like, oh my god, I'm justanother dumb woman, like in the
50s. It's just like, blah, blah,blah. And then those guys are
like, I don't know what to dowith anything.

Rebel (17:21):
But like, you didn't know all the passwords to ever say
that. But I

Shove (17:25):
don't know. I'm just saying like, I don't like you
say that. But like thatinformation. I'm just like, oh,
everything's fine. But like,that's like one of my anxieties.
Like there'll be certain thingsthat I focus on for a while. And
then we'll just like, come backto it. All right.

Rebel (17:39):
Well, I'll make you a list of what to do if I ever
die.

Shove (17:43):
There should be like binders which would be a binder,
I'll

Rebel (17:45):
make a binder a death binder for yes. Yeah, sure.

Shove (17:49):
I'll do that for you.
Mine's easy. It's just give allmy clothes to helium Slayer.

Rebel (17:54):
No. I'm keeping every single one of your clothes if
you die, you're a psychopath. Idon't care if my clothes. No,
no, no, I'm sorry. You leave

Shove (18:06):
my body? Yeah, I'll do that. Spread my ashes. Yeah,
I'll do that and give lockets tomy important people with my
ashes. No,

Rebel (18:16):
yeah, I'll do that. But I'm not giving away your
clothes, because I'm going towear them every day for the rest
of my life.

Shove (18:21):
No, that's why you keep like the jackets and the
hoodies, but you can't wearanything else.

Rebel (18:24):
Oh, yeah. Are you sure?
Cuz I'm pretty sure I can.
Anyways, I so what's in my headall the time is I think that's
interesting that yours is alllike long term stuff. Because
none of mine is long term. ADHD,like it's all short term stuff.
Like it's but it's like amillion short term things. Like,
when we were in the car drivinghome. I thought about so many

(18:48):
different things. And I'll likeproblem solve in my head, but
then it'll just jump from onething to the next thing. Like
I'm trying to figure out aproblem that I have that I'm
like, yeah, anyways, but likethat. And then I'll think about
like, different like DIYprojects, like I was thinking
about how I needed to tie thestrings on the like, hanger
things that I have, like, I wasjust thinking about all of that

(19:10):
kind of stuff. And so if I wasto have like a non busy day, I
wouldn't. Like if I just dideverything that popped in my
head, like it would be on itwould be so chaotic. It would be
unnerving even to me so like myto do list actually soothe me

(19:30):
like it actually makes me sothat I don't just like dart from
place to place and when

Shove (19:35):
I look at your to do list because it's so long I stress
and like that's too much

Rebel (19:39):
stuff. It's because there's so much going on in my
head. And if I don't write itdown on a piece of paper, then
it stays in my head circulating.
But if it's on a piece of papermy brain knows that it can let
me forget it. So then I couldfocus on

Shove (19:54):
some are jumping off the subject here like this could be
a whole nother subject toanother episode. Yeah, anyways,
So busyness you're for you liketo be busy. I don't like to be
busy. You listening or watchingand do you like to be busy, but
like,

Rebel (20:08):
I like to be busy, but I also like not being busy.

Shove (20:12):
I can tell when you're finally tapped out because we'll
come home from something. Andlike we'll literally like lay
with like maybe like one leg oneach other and we'll be on Tik
Tok or Instagram both scrollingfor like an hour or two straight
not saying a single word to eachother. And that's what I'm like.
This BZ finally feels my level.
I know exactly what you'retalking otherwise. She just keep

(20:34):
talking and talking and talkingand talking. And she's like, in
a happy mood. She's just goingI'm gonna show like, let's craft
let's play a game. We could goanywhere. And like, but
everyone's Well, she finallygets tapped out. And I'm like,
think, or someone walked in theroom and was like, you want to

(20:56):
do this? You'd be like, Yeah,that's the difference. I would
be like, No,

Rebel (21:01):
yeah, I do think that I've gotten better to it letting
you like decompress and do yourthing. Like for example, today,
we got home from wherever wewere at the sequoias and, and I
like walked in the door andimmediately started making
earrings. And you like went tothe bedroom and started playing

(21:21):
in your phone. And I like madeearrings. I like put like
strings on things I unpacked.
And then I went and I didorders. And then I was like,
let's do the podcast.

Shove (21:32):
I also cooked for us.

Rebel (21:33):
Oh yeah, you cooked. And then I was like, let's do the
podcast. You were like no. And Iwas like, You're right. I don't
want to do it either.

Shove (21:39):
And then No, you didn't want to do it. But then she said
that my attitude made her angry.
It did make me angry. Butbecause your imaginary friend

Rebel (21:51):
and now I don't feel angry anymore. Things just
weren't working. It was veryfrustrating. My

Shove (21:56):
brain just says Wouldn't you like to be in bed scrolling
on your phone right now? Or likewatching what we do in the
shadows. I finally startedwatching it.

Rebel (22:04):
Understand? What's that show about? I don't get it. Oh,
I'll

Shove (22:07):
talk about it later.
Okay, wanna move along? Oranything else? No,

Rebel (22:11):
I don't. I think that that's all my thoughts about
being busy. Except that I'mcurious. How many of you are
like me, and how many of you arelike shove, which I know what
I've just said. So I'm justreiterating. Please tell us
because I want to know if I'mnot alone in this world. You're
alone. I know for sure thatJessica Savage is like me. And
Heather is like you and Haley islike you actually more people

(22:34):
than not are like you.

Shove (22:36):
Thank God.

Rebel (22:39):
Anyways, okay, well, that's enough about the real
world. Let's go to the wheelworld.

Shove (22:44):
Let's go

Unknown (23:01):
okay,

Rebel (23:01):
did you know I saw this and this is not the wheel where
it is the wheel world but I'mjust let intro into the wheel.
Okay, so I saw this on freakin,like a meme or Instagram post or
whatever, that someone said thatmillennials do hearts like this.
If you're listening, it's likewith two hands and you're making
the heart together. And thenthat Gen Z people do a heart

(23:26):
like this. And for people notwatching. It's like your thumb
and your index finger. It's likethe world's smallest little
heart.

Shove (23:35):
But I feel like but wait, like this. So makes a little
heart like this. Yeah, but I waslike,

Rebel (23:42):
I mean, it doesn't look like a heart. And I had never
seen it before. But I can seewhere it looks like a heart. I
literally thought this personwas doing the world's smallest
violin and that

Shove (23:51):
it's more like it looks like an atomic heart from one
point of view. If anything,which I would get like make an
atomic cart out of your hand. Imean, your face makes more
sense. Yeah, you know, whatever.
Oh,

Rebel (24:03):
do you mean an anatomical heart? Yeah, I was like a Watson
atomic guard.

Shove (24:09):
I didn't realize oh, I'm saying Oh, I

Rebel (24:12):
get what you're saying.
Wouldn't it look kind of likeoh, it's the other way? Oh,
yeah. Because of the like littlewouldn't it be good? My gut?
Any? I don't know. Whatever. Doyou not know what I heard? It
looks like I don't know. It'sbeen a long time since I've been
in biology class. You didn'thave

Shove (24:25):
biology class. Yes.
Anyway, so this is the worldworld.

Rebel (24:29):
Yeah, well, world is where we talk about
rollerskating despite not havingyet talked about robots,

Shove (24:33):
not about generations and how they make hearts. Anyways,
if you follow me on Instagram,which you can be weird if you
actually listen to this podcastand you're like, I don't follow
you. But you never know. Younever know. I know. It feels
like we're late but we're biweekly. So it happens. You

(24:53):
probably heard about the wholepad debacle.

Rebel (24:56):
I know literally shove was like what if we talked about
the pads and I was like What areyou even talking We've
definitely talked about thatalready. But

Shove (25:01):
because it's very often the skate community and every
community where somethinghappens, and then it's like a
big uproar, and then a weeklater everyone's like la la, la,
la,

Rebel (25:12):
la La, and I think,

Shove (25:15):
which is like, Fine, I guess for like the masses, but
as long as like some sort ofchange was actually done like
among the important people. So Idon't know, I'm mixed feelings
about it. But anyways.

Rebel (25:27):
Yeah, so what we're talking about is the pad
debacle, which

Shove (25:30):
was triple eight release a new pad. They did the sleeves,
which they've had before, butlike all people didn't know
about them. I personally don'twear AAA because I never tried
to because they only had smallsizes or sizes are very small.
So I just like I mean, it waslike, well, that's not for me,
like whatever we have 187. So inDerby, that's what I wore. And

(25:53):
then the Moxie 187 ones that Ihelped me are those. So
homography was like, well, nowwe're gonna do a collab with
AAA. I assumed, like some otherpeople, apparently, that would
have all sizes, just like ourother pads. So I was like,
sweet, I'm so excited, yada,yada, yada. And they come and we

(26:14):
see they go that we have smallthat even extra small, they have
small, to extra art small tolarge, small to

Rebel (26:21):
medium large.

Shove (26:24):
And I was like, What the fudge? Like, why this is so
ridiculous. So yeah, so like, Iwas like, Well, I'm not allowed
to talk about them becausethey're new. Because like,
that's why it's weird. Becauselike I work for like Moxie. And
then it's like to speak out.
It's like, there was like athing where I was like, Oh,
shit, and I'll probably get introuble. But as a fat advocate,

(26:45):
and a fat skater, like, I gottasay something because if I
didn't work here, I definitelywould say something. And like,

Rebel (26:53):
you're not in charge of making those products. Yeah, I
think it's like very importantto clarify that like, yeah,
people just assume that becauseyou made a thick set that you
have a say and like a lot ofproducts that Moxie makes and
you don't Yeah, and like be likevery

Shove (27:05):
which can be really hard because we go to amongst pizza
calm and you look at staff page,it says Courtney shove director
of merchandise, which which istrue. Not true. I haven't done
anything on merchandise for overa year now. So there's that. But
so I think a lot of people wereconfused. And it's like, Well,
why didn't you do this way toyou, because like, I'm not in

(27:26):
those meetings. I not in thatroom. Like, I don't have any
fucking power there. So I know,it could be like, hard. I'm one
of like, seven people that workthere. But none of the people
that I work like hands on withknew this was gonna happen. So
all my skinny coworkers werealso like, upset about it. And

(27:46):
I'm the one that filmed them forthis year, so people were like,
Oh, I hate that it was just abunch of skinny people. It's
like, well, it had to be becauseonly on one side large. So for
me, I'm like, well, obviously,that's what I'm talking about
the size and like, of course, itdoesn't look inclusive. Because

Rebel (28:00):
how can I be?

Shove (28:03):
Oh, um, so I had like, I had fun that day. I was skating.
And it was a really good day atwork. But then I remember even
started out with me like tearingup. I don't know if I told you
about that. Like I showed up.
But I purposely didn't putmakeup on or anything because I
was like, I'm just the one onskating with the camera. Like,
obviously, I can't work with anyproducts. I'm not going to be an
app. And then they were like,well, maybe like, maybe we could

(28:24):
do this. And like we could stillbe in it like you maybe try that
elbow pads. I was like No, dude,like, I already know. Like,
that's not gonna work. Like Ijust don't want to talk about
XML already. phillium type away.
And I like tear it up, as I wassaying that, because it's just
like upsetting like to be a fatskater and not feel to know

(28:46):
that, like, people aren't stillconsidering you that they're
just thinking we can just makestreet sizes. And then if it
does, well, like why are we anafterthought? Like, why are plus
sizes always an afterthought?
Why isn't it just like, includedin the get go?

Rebel (29:00):
And you would think that after like, they had made the
thickset that they would havelearned it would have just been
like, oh, yeah, like fat skatersexist and are important and made
money off of them and likeshould be able to, like, be safe
and also cute. Like, I don'tknow, it's just like, so weird
to me. Yeah.

Shove (29:20):
So it was a whole thing.
And of course, like my jobwasn't like that happy about the
way I they were not standard ifthey were not stoked. They were
not stoked it. But like, at thesame time, like, I felt like I
did anything wrong. And I thinkthey were just concerned about
like, Why didn't come to them.
But you did. But that's why Ididn't say stuff. And like at

(29:41):
the end of the day, like changewas made. So they told me that
and AAA announced like that theyare gonna make bigger sizes. So
that's good, but I don't know Idon't know how to feel about it
because it's still annoying.
Like I'm glad that like, nowthey know but like it shouldn't
take Like a call out calling onthe internet to make you want to

(30:02):
do what should we obviouslyright?

Rebel (30:06):
And I also just think like, I just don't believe that
the next time. Like it's gonnabe included the first time.
Yeah, you know, I mean like ifit happened with the thickset
and then this happened, and thenthey finally make bigger sizes.
Like what's to make themactually make bigger sizes next
time? I don't know I just don't

Shove (30:27):
need TG T. What's that other RAM TX GTG oh my oh boy
they called What are you talkingabout? You didn't see that post
that other brand no one

Rebel (30:37):
that was like we do plus sizes and they only went up to
an XL. I don't remember

Shove (30:41):
GE or something like that. Anyways, so like, someone
texted me or wasn't shame.
Someone was like, leave it to aman to try to be like, we're
better than you. So anyway, sothis brand t something whatever.
They post this pad and they'relike, we're inclusive extra

(31:02):
small to extra large because webelieve in all bodies and they
put capital there so they likesaw opportunity to be like but
look at us. I like you. Oh mycare have to exit. Only Wow,
what do you do? You got toExcel. So I had commented I was
petty and I was just like, oh myGod for all bodies. I would love
to try this. And you have a3x 4x so I and then Shane went

(31:22):
ahead and measured look at theirmeasurement, their size chart.
And he was like, it's only threecentimeters of a difference from
the large pad that threecentimeters there extra largest
three centimeters bigger. Nothan the large of the triple

(31:42):
eight.

Rebel (31:45):
What the crap? Yeah,

Shove (31:46):
I did not know that. And everyone's sharing it like yeah,
see? inclusivity? Um, of course,wait, do your research. And it
was thin skaters. Like yeah,see, here we go. And it's like,
like, extra large is notinclusive. Like, it's

Rebel (31:58):
literally not. It's not my okay.

Shove (32:02):
And then like, drop because all my mama worked on
the pad, the coloring that cameout and she messaged me, and she
was like, or she commented andwas like, oh, yeah, like it
does. This one is bigger. And Iwas like, well, it's just hard
for me to believe that extralarge would fit and 3x. So I'm
not sure like a 2x 3x. And shewas like, Oh, when I get home

(32:22):
like I'm on the road, like, I'llmeasure for you and just see.
And then like, which was great.
I've heard nice. I can'tremember I need to check back to
see if she did but I was justlike, in my head like I know
there's no way especially aftershame like literally what
society is literally like, yeah,like no. Yeah, nice. Right? And
then 187 posted Jules, who is afat skater in Canada. And she

(32:49):
does like a whole thing withthe, the derby pads we used to
wear on them. And then she's afat skater. She's like, my size
and she's and it's like allabout where to find precise gear
and like so of course, theyposted her tic tock. And it is
like they saw an opportunity andran with it too. Because they
were like, Oh, we've ever postedwe up. But then if you look at

(33:11):
their profile on med school,it's not any fat skaters. And
the jam DeLorean John DeLoreanposted in their story. And they
said, Oh, I just think it'sfunny because like everyone
talks about size inclusivity.
But all I ever see is Jules andshove and Jules and Shep and not
only two thoughts,

Rebel (33:30):
there's so many more fat skaters out there. Yeah, like so
many fat skaters. And also notall fat skaters want a high
impact knee pad. No, that's theissue is that the only plus size
like inclusive pads are thisthick. Like the thick set is
really high impact. Like a lotof skaters I can tell you for

(33:54):
sure dance skaters. Like I'vetalked to several of them
recently that are plus size arelike yo, I want like the Bad's
that I could wear to the rink,low key underneath my stuff,
which I get because I spent theentirety of disco aces wearing
knee pads, because I didn't knowwhat the crap I was doing. And I

(34:16):
felt all the time. And the onlyway I got those pads was because
I ordered them from frickinPoland from this like dancewear
company that I had to have thewebsite translated and they made
like special sizes.

Shove (34:31):
Oh my gosh, yeah, I just there's so many limited are like
what like the heavy hitters aregoing to be s one triple eight
187. Who else? scabs

Rebel (34:45):
and polemics some they're just not big enough.

Shove (34:48):
No, but I mean like a heavy hitter like the main
companies people get Padstow,yeah,

Rebel (34:52):
Impala. Yeah, lots of people get Impala pads.

Shove (34:55):
I see a lot of people like I see

Rebel (34:57):
people in the Impala pads. Mm. Hmm, a lot of
beginners because they have thewhole pad set. When you're a
beginner, a lot of people willget the scabs pad set or the
Impala pad set.

Shove (35:08):
Both of them like the impacts really bad, right?

Rebel (35:11):
I actually like the impact of the impalas. I am
definitely too fat to wear themnow. But when I was first doing
my YouTube channel, I could fitin them in the XL.

Shove (35:22):
I'm just really pissed off that I can't fit them. Paula
Valentine's

Rebel (35:27):
is so cute. Because you just skater

Shove (35:31):
ginger Taylor. She's an artist in Australia, I believe.
She did the design, the wholecapsule design and like the
skateboard deck, so fuckingcute. Like, I totally put that
on our wall. And we should getthat the pattern follow? Where
are you at, and the pad set. Itwas really cute. It has like a
little red heart in the middleof the shell. And they're so

(35:52):
adorable. But anyways, come on,companies make over a large and
over an extra large make over 2xmake over 3x

Rebel (36:00):
And don't make us validate our existence like and
like do your research. It mademe so frustrated. That like what
they were saying was, you know,like, fill out this survey, let
us know that there's demand,like the demand.

Shove (36:18):
No, that didn't make me mad. Note that. Will they even
Okay,

Rebel (36:23):
no, not the survey. But the survey, like the idea behind
it that there has to be proofthat there is demand.

Shove (36:30):
And that's what made more understanding because people got
mad at Moxie for me like, Oh,you want us to follow a survey.
And that was just Moxie havingthe power to be like, hey, AAA
isn't doing it. So at leastwe're gonna do something to try
and figure it out to show themproof. And that was a
disconnect.

Rebel (36:47):
For me. What what made me the most angry was this company
saying, show us proof thatyou're there and you'll buy in
order for us to make this foryou when there is proof already,
because of the fixes.

Shove (37:03):
What is stupid is like, oh, yeah, there's going to be
proof that they want it. We'llsee how these sizes do. But it's
like, how does that prove thatlike larger sizes one by skinny
people buying them?

Rebel (37:13):
Yeah, like that doesn't make any sense. But also,
couldn't you just like put asurvey out? Like before you
release? Yeah, like they mighthave like, a certain like any
kind of market research, anysort of market research or
research? Literally, there'sbeen Yeah, the market research
is already even done. Like theyjust had to find it. Like I
don't know, like I just I'm amarketing professional. So like,

(37:33):
It just pisses me I'd also

Shove (37:34):
had someone like I literally created a hashtag for
SAT skaters. Come on companies.
Look at hashtag fat skate love.
Look at all the fat people reachout to those people for content
because guess what they'rewearing the fucking gear you
probably make already. So youcould post them just like you
post all these other assholes.
So they're not, I suppose, butyou know what I'm saying. So
it's just like, it's just likean afterthought that isn't as

(37:57):
annoying as fat phobic.

Rebel (38:01):
It sucks. And the fight for inclusivity. Like within,

Shove (38:07):
you can't win it, you can never win because it's not just
a fight that can be won or lost.
It's something you have to workat and work for. And it's
exhausting, ongoing. And it'slike exhausting, especially the
beginning. But I don't thinkit's exhausting forever.
Because, like when it becomesyour norm, if you just keep
doing it, you do kind of breakdown from that fatphobia just

(38:29):
like in race. Like when you'reif you're like a racist person.
Of course, if you're not aroundany black people, you don't give
a fuck you have all thesehorrible thoughts. But then you
realize, oh shit, I'm beingracist. And then you start
opening it up, you starteducating yourself. And it's
really hard because it'schanging the way your mind
works. But then all sudden, youhave black friends, even you're
more knowledgeable about it, andyou already know what's wrong,

(38:50):
what's not right or what's rightand what's wrong. And it just
starts coming naturally to you.
And it's no longer tiring. A lotof you people realize that and
2020 and are a little bit betternow for it. Same thing when it
comes to fat people to fatphobia, homophobia, all the
phobias. It's like, yeah, it'sgonna be hard to be better at

(39:11):
first, but it's not going to betiring forever, because you are
going to just know how to be abetter person and know what's
wrong with what's wrong. What'sright.

Rebel (39:21):
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I was saying that it was exhausting
for us. Oh no, I was saying it'slike exhausting for us to
constantly fight it, but like tolike know that we all have each
other's backs. You know,

Shove (39:37):
I don't have anyone's back.

Rebel (39:38):
Yeah, you do. Shut up.
Yeah, I don't know. So that wasreally I think frustrating but
also, I don't know to me, it'sjust like Do you really think
like, if I just don't understandon so many levels, because for
me, I'm like, to our money likeis money and like, money is just

(40:00):
as great and you just like don'tsee it as real money or you
don't see it as, or it's justlike an afterthought like I just
Yeah. I mean, I know, but Idon't know. Any other things
that you have to say about that?

Shove (40:26):
No, I guess that's it.
Although I'll just throw this inhere. It's not a skate thing.
But it's a gym thing. There isone machine that I can't fit in.
I keep using what is actually towhat I can't use at all because
it has like a seatbelt thing wehad to put on. And then you can
lift the weight when you do thebooty one when you lift, like
remember how I had you sit on mywaist and then I went up and

(40:47):
down the hip thrust or whatever.
And it couldn't even close onhilly. So I was like, but
there's the odd one where youlike, get on your knees, and
then you twist. Oh, that one wastight for me. Yeah, so I have
one leg that goes in. And thenmy other knee kind of sits
hovers and I just press it in. Ilove that. Yeah. So like, I feel

(41:10):
like Jesus gyms are supposed tobe not just for like, you think,
Oh, I'm big. I'm gonna work out.
Not that you should have to butI should be we're all sizes.
Like it's just funny becausethey always have like, felt
people should go to the gym morethan you go to the gym. And then
it's like, Oh, why is there afat person working out or like,
oh, or like it's just onemachine. Also say like, their

(41:30):
skill isn't fat phobic, which isnice. A lot of skills will not
go over 300 power

Rebel (41:37):
like the Wii, the Wii scale thing that's like, Oh,
yeah. Yeah. It's like, I don'tactually have a wait for you.
You're too much.

Shove (41:48):
Yeah, everywhere in the world from like, I've posted
about it before like dentists,all his medical offices, like
restaurants you go in, you can'teven fit in the chair. There's
so many things. You know, likecertainly on Tik Tok, like
things that Californians dothat, like wouldn't make other
people freak out. There'ssomeone people started doing
like, things that fat peopleexperience that like skinny

(42:13):
people should? We should? Yeah,but I have no idea. Yeah. And
it's just like, yeah, not beingmore fit in the seeds. Like
worrying about this, it's gonnabreak or like the booth at a
restaurant or planes, like allthe there's so many things. And
to it's not just in the skatecommunity, it's in the world all
together. So if you're listeningto this, and you are not a fat

(42:34):
person, whether you're just midsize, small, fat, whatever it
might be, if you can navigatethe world and never have to
think, well, I fit in this well,they have something that I can
fit into, like that question younever had to worry about. Now
that that's a privilege. Andlike, just think about it, like
you probably have a fat friend.
Are they gonna fit there? Arethey going to be able to

(42:57):
experience the same things youcan do? Maybe if you're gonna go
them all together? Does mallhave even one plus size store?
Or what is your fat friend justhad to go buy a bunch of
accessories and be awkward inevery store and have a great
experience like you? There'sjust so many random things you
got to think about?

Rebel (43:13):
Yeah, like, like, I was talking to someone the other day
about this. And I'm going to bevague on purpose, because it's,
yeah. But every time almostevery time that man shove,
individually or separately go ona gig. Actually, I can only
speak for myself. So anytimethat I've gone on a gig, or I've

(43:36):
gotten a gig with Chef 90% ofthe time, I'm required to bring
my own wardrobe. Because they donot have clothes for me in my
size. And this is for like longterm gigs. This is for short
term gigs. This happens very,very, very, very often, like

(43:56):
majority of the time, I knowthat I'm going to need to pull
things from my wardrobe. I evenknow what in my wardrobe that
they like.

Shove (44:04):
And the chances are that like, in the beginning, probably
for you to thought it wastotally normal, thought it was
totally normal. As soon as youhave a gig that other people are
involved, you feel like everyoneelse was giving clothes,
everyone else is giving a plussize plus size B which of course
will be either just one of us orboth of us because there's
always you just have to haveyou.

Rebel (44:24):
There's always one and I'm like just mid size enough to
be like the fat person. But notlike a truly like plus plus
size. I don't even know how toexplain it. But like, because
I'm on the mid size like lowsmall fat and like I'll just be
like, Oh yeah, do you have thisor do you have that and

Shove (44:46):
they'll literally like go through our Instagrams and be
like, can you bring this thisand this is like some of those
things are like five years old.
What are you doing?

Rebel (44:53):
I have seen many of my board have just my stuff. Yeah,
why can't you just get us stuff?
A lot of times they can't But Iwill say though, since I joined
the LA Roller Girls, I've been,every I've been on two gigs. I
know it's not a lot. I've beenon two gigs as an official la
roller girl. And both of themI've been provided clothes in my

(45:13):
size. Nice. And that makes mefeel so included and special.
And I shouldn't feel like thatis the biggest deal ever. Like,
I literally feel like I'm gonnacry right now because I like I
talked to the head of LaRollergirls about it. Like I
talked to Crystal about it. Shewas like, like, what? No, we
will always have quote, like,you're gonna like one. It's

(45:34):
fine. Like, we will alwaysfigure it out like we will do.
Like, it'll be fine. And I wasjust like, No, but you don't
understand what a big deal thatis. Like every other gig that
I've had. So far, I've beengiven a, you know, a vision
board of my own outfits. Andwhen told to bring, I have
literally brought an entireclothing rack to set. Yeah, more

(45:54):
than once, like, more than fiveto like, many times have I been
told to bring like my wholecloset to set. Yeah, and not
nothing against the people thathave hired me. Thank you for
giving me money. But also like,I literally thought that was
normal until I did you knowother gigs where people

Shove (46:14):
say, Wait, yeah, you brought your own clothes. What
were we supposed to bring ourown clothes, let's like yeah,
and

Rebel (46:19):
they're just like digging into the uncomfortableness that
is you having to pack yourentire, like your entire closet,
lug it all around. And never,they didn't never like get it
from you, like you're alwayslugging it around. And then at
the end of the gig, you alwayshave to like put it all away. So
you're like last to leave.
Because you have to collect allyour stuff, you come home, you

(46:39):
make a mess, you have to put allyour clothes away again. And
it's just like, cool. Andeveryone else gets new stuff.
And everyone else is like,potentially like oh, hey, you
get to take this home, or youjust like use this stuff on set.
And then you leave it there. Butyeah, so it's just different.
It's different.

Shove (46:59):
I have one fashion brand dress that I love that I
purposely just barely don't evenwear, because I got so over it
because I had to wear it forthree gigs. Everyone I stopped
telling them about becausethey'd be like, Oh, the pink one
with the French, the pink onewith the French, the pink one.
They look great when you'reskating. I'm like,

Rebel (47:16):
fuck them over this.
That's how that's where I'm atwith my cloud dress.

Shove (47:20):
And it's an expensive dress, so like to be like, Oh,
you want me to skate around inthe bins? Like the first
expensive dress I ever boughtmyself. Like I was always it was
like 200 $200 And that's a lotfor a dress. I know it'd be more
like that's not that much. It'sa lot for a dress. And to know
that like I just had to use anabuse it by like skating and

(47:40):
hours for it. Like I don't getpaid for that. And then that's
another thing I'm realizing andlike we should have we didn't
know better. We could have beenlike, Okay, are you gonna pay us
for our using our personalclothing? Yeah. For this gig
like, so it's like frustrating,like, you live in eLearn. But
yeah, fatphobia it's everywhere.
Yeah,

Rebel (47:58):
that's how I feel about my cloud dress. Like enough
people have asked to use it now.
I'm like, I actually paid like$100 for that dress. And I want
to wear it for myself and notfor you. Thank you. And yes, got
heated for a second there. Butthat's fine.

Shove (48:14):
Let's move on to some things we're obsessed with.
Yeah.

Rebel (48:31):
These are my obsession.

Shove (48:33):
What are you obsessed with right now

Rebel (48:35):
wedding planning? Sure. I am totally obsessed with wedding
planning right now. And I knowthat our wedding is a very long
time away, but I'm very obsessedwith it. I'm having so much fun.
My best friend's made me awedding planning binder. And
I've been using it I put like abunch of sheets in those like

(48:57):
plastic protector those likesheet protectors. And so it's
all nice and it's going to bepreserved. And I've been taking
notes and I put like our colorsin there. And I'm going to put
some pictures in there.

Shove (49:07):
And and you ask someone to be your bridesmaid

Rebel (49:11):
I officially asked someone to be my bridesmaid. So
I have a one official bridesmaidso far. And it was so cute. And
I'm just really obsessed. I'm soexcited. Uh, we're totally out
of wedding money so far, but wehave lots of plans. And I'm

(49:34):
having so much fun. I know Ialready said that. But I'm like,
being a visionary. And thenlike, dreaming of creative ways
to do things and writing thingsdown that we have ideas about.
And yeah, I'm just getting sostoked and feeling good. Love

(49:55):
that we got our engagementphotos this last weekend.
because that was one thing I'mgonna list that has been coming
for a very long time becauseyes, we did get engaged on
February 22 2022. And yes, it isFebruary, like the week of
February 12 2023. But weofficially did it before it was
one year. So it's still in stillin the engagement year. And

(50:20):
yeah, so we have a location. Wehave a date. We have a
photographer, and now we havelots of crystals for our
centerpieces. I have a craftthat I need to start doing
that's also involving thecenterpieces. And then we're
gonna have pictures soon and Ican't wait to see. So excited.

(50:45):
Yeah, I even have a supplementalbinder because one binder
doesn't fit everything. So I gotanother binder to be
supplemental. And I'm going todecorate like the front and the
back. You know, like when youwere in high school in middle
school and you like madecollages or pictures and stuff.
And then you like put it in thefront back. I'm gonna do that
here. And it has tabs.

Shove (51:04):
Oh my god. It's so cute.
Sound obsessed.

Rebel (51:07):
I am so obsessed.

Shove (51:12):
I am obsessed. I don't know. It was really an
obsession. But I did binge watchsomething the other day. I was
like, I kept seeing thingsonline about like, episode three
has made like triggered liketraumatized. I cry faces and
stuff. And I was like, What isthis? I mean, it was like this
show. The Last of Us. Oh, mg.
Actually this new episode I needto watch. But I told her I was

(51:37):
like you to watch it because itmade me think view the love of
the cried ugly cried so hard.
She's like, I don't wanna besad. I was like, but it's so
good. It's about love. Whichapparently like the whole game
that it's after, like, themeaning of the whole thing is
love and relationships. But ofcourse that wouldn't be like
exciting for people to play agame like that. That also has

(51:58):
like these like fungus mushroomzombie like things in it. So
like I had to have like thisaction and like all this like
stuff. But all a mushroomzombie. Yeah, it's like a fungi
that gets into your body. Andthen you like people and infect
them. It's like an infection.
But they start like the fungustakes over their body. And it's

(52:19):
funny because it's based offthis thing that like does exist,
but it just doesn't affecthumans. And I remember someone
talking about like, thisdocumentary where it happens to
ants. And like, I rememberwatching that. So it's like a
thing that gets in your body andtakes over your brain. And so
your body is still moving, butthen it'll like

Rebel (52:38):
how fast does that happen? Fast? Oh, no. Yeah,

Shove (52:42):
so it's almost like a parasite. But it's a fungus.
Fungus, it can only communicateto other

Rebel (52:47):
how do you how do you get it? Or is it says boiler so
yeah, it could

Shove (52:51):
be a spool in the first episode. They've kind of let you
know like kind of hint at it.
And they're like, oh, it'sprobably from the food like
probably gotten to the wheatbecause it is a fungus. Probably
I'm sure the wheat like peopleate a lot of bread or whatever
it pie just got into yoursystem. No, I eat lots of bread.
Yeah, but don't worry, you'refine. But like they also
mentioned like, oh, and the verybeing like it probably never
spread unless like thetemperature of the world got
warmer. Just like globalwarming. Yeah. But anyway, so

(53:14):
the show is like, really good.
And I did watch the episode anugly cried and rebel was out of
town. And I was just like, oh,like holding

Rebel (53:24):
that when you texted me and you were like, I really wish
you were here.

Shove (53:27):
No. Okay, that was another time. But yeah, so it's
a really good show. I reallylike it. But the other one like
on like, a Happy Show, is whatwe do in the shadows. I find
like people are always like,show if you love the show, like
you're gonna love it. And like Ijust started watching me and

(53:49):
like I was actually like, myanxiety was so bad a day. And I
was like depression but notreally depression, I think just
like anxiety. And it was likemaking me laugh my ass off. It's
a mockumentary about vampires.
So it's like, imagine there's adocumentary like crew let's like
fill me in vampires that havebeen around for 1000. roommates,
the vampire house and they'reall like completely different.

(54:13):
And it's ridiculous. They stillmost of them dress old timey.
And then one of them has afamiliar who's like this guy
named yermo. Because it'sfamiliar for 10 years and all he
wants to be as a vampire butlike, he doesn't get turned in.
He's just treated like a shittylike assistant, personal
assistant. Like a random everyepisode, something happens and
it's just like so funny. I'llmake you watch an episode. We

(54:36):
will watch one after this. Okay,but it's hilarious. And it's
like, there's so many peoplegetting murdered and stuff and
it's like blood everywhere. Butit's like funny, and I can't
describe it but like it's sogood. And it was able to bring
me joy when I was in a darkplace. So like I was like, This
is great. This is what I need.

Rebel (54:55):
Are the camera people humans or vampire humans, and a

Shove (54:59):
couple of them die. Oh, Holy boy.

Rebel (55:01):
Oh no, because

Shove (55:02):
they're like a dangerous situation like, like vampires.
And I'm like the werewolves andlike,

Rebel (55:08):
Oh, I love that. Do you want to hear the other thing
that I'm obsessed with rightnow? You're gonna be so mad at
me.

Shove (55:17):
You want to save it for the next time? We're gonna talk
about it. Now.

Rebel (55:19):
I want to talk about it right now, as it's really short.
Okay, the other thing that I'mobsessed with right now is
shove, whenever she like, fallsasleep. But like, isn't going to
sleep yet. Like not like goingto bed. But like, let's say she
was tired right now on on thecouch, or like in the car. She
like will fall asleep. And thenshe'll like, snore a little bit

(55:41):
is like a light snore. And thenshe'll immediately like giggle.
Like, like, wakes up. I beginsthe cutest

Shove (55:51):
girl. Like, it's when you're like, first one is like,

Rebel (55:55):
you can't even you can't even imitate it. Like,

Shove (55:58):
it's like, and like the laughing is what wakes me up.
And I'm just like, Yeah, it's

Rebel (56:02):
like she laughs at herself snoring

Shove (56:04):
I think especially for every i think it's like a
something's on to it's like away I think it started as a way
of like, for me to be like, playoff that I fell asleep is like,
if I'm laughing, it will looklike I'm painted.

Rebel (56:18):
So cute. And it happens all the time. And it's happened
more recently. And so I'venoticed it and I was like, Do
you know that you do this? Andshe's like, oh, yeah, like, it's
so cute. I'm obsessed with it.
Anyways, that's my obsession.

Shove (56:32):
So thanks for outing me.
That's embarrassing. It's not

Rebel (56:34):
embarrassing. It's literally the cutest thing I've
ever experienced.

Shove (56:39):
Anyways, I have some announcements to me
announcement. One is that on ourYouTube, we are now up to 884
subscribers.

Rebel (56:50):
Heck yeah.

Shove (56:51):
So we're pretty close to 1000.

Rebel (56:56):
We're really trying to get 1000 subscribers so we can
monetize this podcast. Yeah.
Because because of money rightnow you might be watching, like,
if you're watching on thepodcast on the YouTube, you may
be watching ads, but we don'tget any of that money. Yeah,
it's annoying to get some money.
Yeah, so

Shove (57:13):
you know, so

Rebel (57:14):
help us get the money that you're paying, but not
paying. Yeah, cuz

Shove (57:19):
the two hours it takes forever to edit it that I don't
know, I'm assuming it takes twohours to edit it. And then an
hour or more of us just doing itlive. So that's our time and and
then we do have to pay to justhave rights to the music and
streaming services. This is anexpensive hobby that we would
like to have some money. Oh,man, I'd be so cool. Even though

(57:43):
we know it won't be much. It'llbe something to make me feel
better. Like, oh, we should doit. So we can at least make $5
Which does not even cover theexpenses of anything. But
anyways, I'd also like to say,sweet, you'd have 1000 I finally
hit 100k on Instagram. Yeah, I'dlike a real go viral. And I

(58:07):
finally found my people like myfatties in the world that like
aren't skaters. And I thinklike, it's super cool. And I've
been having messages from likeall these fat people that are
like, Oh my God, I didn't knowthat I could skate and skate
forever. Like, I bought skates ayear ago or a month ago. And
like, I thought, because I wasabout that, like, that's where I
was struggling to like it's kindof like reignited a whole new

(58:30):
audience for me and like aplatform for like me to share
that, like people can do it atany size. So that's been really
cool. I felt like I don't getthat many questions about like
skating and like beginner stuffanymore. And now it's like
starting again. And I didn'treally have reception that well
all weekend. And I was like,Whoa, I think I'm gonna hit 100k

(58:50):
By the time we leave. And sureenough, as of today, I made
102,000 or 200,000 copies andlike, nothing really happens.
And I was just like, Oh, that'scool. Like, for me, it was just
like a fun like, Oh my God, andmaybe when do you need to
educate? Just like rebel waswith subscribers on YouTube?

(59:11):
Yeah, but on YouTube, it's a bigdeal to get like a POC and
everything. And it's like, wayharder. But um, I don't know. So
then they were like, Oh, you gotto do something like, and I was
like, I don't know. Is thatcheesy? Like, I know, so he will
do it. But I'm like, I don'tknow. I don't I feel like I
don't know. Like, like,

Rebel (59:29):
I think you should it's a big accomplishment a milestone.

Shove (59:33):
I remember. Like, didn't they do something for 10k? I
don't even know. I think I justdid like a post.

Rebel (59:37):
I probably I think it's something for 1k Two.

Shove (59:42):
I don't know. It's kind of cool. Because it's like, I
feel like it's an accomplishmentlike Have I done anything? Yeah,
I think I just have likeimpostor syndrome right now.

Rebel (59:51):
Yeah. I mean, like you literally created a platform and
like, you share your own selfand your vulnerabilities and you
You are a role model for otherpeople. And also a fashion icon.
No,

Shove (01:00:04):
I think it feels like boastful, like, look at me, I
got 100

Rebel (01:00:08):
I think it's less about like, boastful and more about
like gratitude andacknowledgement of like, you see
the people. It's not like thepeople that are following you
don't mean anything. Yeah, like,Y'all are important to me. And
I'm really grateful to have youalong on this journey. And it
does.

Shove (01:00:26):
And I know it's not gonna last because like, once a
several stops training, itsounds like I'll lose, like, I
literally lose, like, hundredsof followers a day.

Rebel (01:00:34):
But I don't think that this isn't gonna last,

Shove (01:00:37):
but like, I could easily drop under 100k. And that's not
gonna make me cry anymore. Andit's just like, it is funny. I
was thinking about it, though.
Like, on the drive, like, I waslike, I'm driving home, like,
how it's 2020 mean. And I feellike that's why it happened.
Finally, because the past yearis like being so like, wrapped
up in the numbers and are like,being like, what did I do wrong?

(01:01:00):
Like, people don't like me whenI would like lose a lot of
followers. I'm like, investedlike it's a check, like my
insights all the time. Like, ohmy god, like how many people how
many new followers like daily, Iwould check it sometimes
multiple times a day. And then Ijust stopped like, I just like,
was like, okay, whatever, postwhatever I want, like, do
whatever I want. Don't post atall. But specifically this year,

(01:01:21):
as I said, it's 2020 me like,oh, like, I'm not just a skater,
why am I pigeon holing my wholesocial media to only been skate
content. Like I wanted it to belike, random deep things. I
wanted to be like, just randomthings. I did whatever I want,
like, use sounds that I thinkare like cheesy and fun and make
me happy or like gym stuff,like, whatever I'm experiencing,

(01:01:43):
that makes me feel creativeposts it. And that's what I
started doing. And then now thishappens. And I'm like, I just
I'm a firm believer thateverything happens when it's
supposed to. And that whenyou're trying too hard for
something, it's not gonna workout like it has been natural. So
I feel like, you know, like,what does that lucky girl emoji

(01:02:04):
syndrome P girls, girl syndrome,everything wakes. And it's like
funny because like, I hate like,Oh, lucky girl syndrome, but
it's like, it's all it is, ismanifesting. And I am a believer
in manifesting and like, thingsdo always work out the way it
is. So I've seen that for a longtime. But like we've been trying
to save even more like all thetime, like whenever pressure is

(01:02:25):
like things always work out.
Everything happens for a reason.
And like so I think it's reallycool. It is cool. That happened.
I know. It's just a number, butit's just like, wow, like that
many people saw me and it waslike, I subscribe. I follow like
nice. And I heard that that'spretty cool. And I'm most
excited about having a largerplatform now that kind of like,

(01:02:47):
de stigmatize mental health and,like destroy fat phobia, and
like all these things, and like,hopefully, like open the door to
roller skating to like otherpeople that didn't think they
could so that's pretty cool. Soas I'm saying that, maybe I will
like, do something. I don'tknow. Because I've never had any

(01:03:09):
time because I'm busy. Why am Ialways busy because of this one,
but who likes to be busy her. Soguess what? She likes being
busy. She loves me, which meansby default, I will be busy until
I go into the grave. So Iwrapped it all up.

Rebel (01:03:27):
She says busy like we don't do fun things like I'll
literally make some 100k thinghappen for you.

Shove (01:03:33):
I'm not saying that being busy, doesn't have fun things
been busy though. All the thingswe do like it can be fun things
with time. But then like when hegets to the end. The fun things
don't even fall fine. If you'vebeen too busy for a while.

Rebel (01:03:48):
Yeah. Oh my god, I forgot to tell you. But when I was at
the Southwest thing, I ran intosomeone who is at the fat babe
skate. That's so random atrandom. Like I was skating
around and someone was like, ohmy god, were you like are you
from? Like LA area? And I waslike, Yeah, I'm an LA roller
girl. And she's like, she'slike, Oh, I think I saw you like

(01:04:13):
a little bit ago. Like a coupleweeks ago at the Batman skate. I
was like, Oh yeah, that's

Shove (01:04:17):
me. You're all walking around skate around LA roller.
Like, are you from LA? And he'slike, you're like No, Louisiana.

Rebel (01:04:26):
No, no, I wasn't wearing an LA roller. I was wearing like
a was it funny? When That'd befunny. It

Shove (01:04:33):
was just the Louisiana Louisiana roller girl. bellies.

Rebel (01:04:39):
Yeah. But yeah, I thought that was funny. Is there skaters
everywhere skaters everywhere.

Shove (01:04:44):
Did anyone recognize you when you were out and about
there besides that?

Rebel (01:04:49):
No, I actually didn't really see anyone like we were
very not out and about. We onlywere like walking around outside
by ourselves and then we went tolike very low pop related
places. But I did rent my firstelectric scooter.

Shove (01:05:06):
And he didn't crash.

Rebel (01:05:07):
No, I didn't. But did you know that they cost basically
the same amount as an Uber? Oh,what I know I was I thought so
too. And it was $7 for me toget, like one mile somewhere.
And I was like this. Oh, no.
Expensive. Just wow. Yeah. Allright. Well, well, thanks for
hanging out with us. I'm in amuch better mood now. And I
definitely am glad that werecorded skate date tonight. And

(01:05:29):
I love you all.

Shove (01:05:33):
I'm glad we did it too.
So that way rebel wouldn't go tobed mad at me. I

Rebel (01:05:38):
never go to bed mad at you.

Shove (01:05:40):
Anyways, we gotta go so that I can make her watch this
funny show. I can't wait.

Rebel (01:05:45):
Can't wait to see it. All right. Like, comment and
subscribe if you're watching onthe YouTube. And if you're
listening on Apple podcast, giveus a stellar review. And if you
have any things that you'd likeus to talk about, feel free to
email us at Deer [e-mail].

Shove (01:06:01):
And we're also on Spotify. I don't do Apple Music.
I know we're on.

Rebel (01:06:05):
We're on every streaming platform. But yeah, so try and
put us on every streaming. Okay,bye