December 8, 2021 • 63 mins
In season 2 episode 38 of Skate Date we talk about Seasonal Depression and also roller skating anxiety. Yes, it's a doozy. We have a visit from 2 girls one pup! YAY Bowie, and dear shovel.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Unknown (00:13):
Welcome to escape de.
What's your favorite podcastwith your favorite couple? Yay.
Yeah, I'm shove I'm rebel.
Together we are. Shovel. Can youdig it? I can. Can you dig it?
That's the question. Welcomeback, y'all. It's another
Wednesday or whatever day it isfinally got edited. Hello.
Rebel (00:35):
Yeah, sorry. I've been on struggle bus, which is why we're
talking about well, we'retalking about today. What are we
talking about? today? We'regoing to talk about seasonal
depression. And then we're alsogoing to talk about skating
anxiety, so buckle on andbecause it's gonna be a wild
ride,
Shove (00:52):
that's fun. Yeah, I don't look like trash today. Yeah, you
look amazing. Yeah, I usuallylook like trash. But that's
because like today, I had aphotoshoot early in the morning.
And so I had some leftovermakeup. And then I just like,
went a little crazy and readyfor recording this. I figured,
why not?
Rebel (01:13):
Yeah. What I am realizing though, is that the light is way
too bright. And I need to turndown the brightness. So give me
one second. Look at that. Youcan tell him block now. Look at
that. We don't look like ghosts.
Amazing. So today, yeah, we'retalking about lots of fun
things. And by fun things. Imean, real shit, because that's
(01:34):
what we do. Here. We talk aboutthe real shit. So how have you
been this last week? Chef? hasbeen alright. Yeah, I use a
cevin to vape. Um, I've been allright. It's Black Friday weekend
through Cyber Monday. And yeah,I think prepping for it was
(01:57):
really crazy. But yeah, yeah,definitely. I feel like it's
been a little bit crazy of aweekend even though it's like,
cool, because you have a 40weekend. So it's been awesome to
have you around more often. ButI've been feeling pretty
stressed. And under pressure. SoI'm I think it'll be a lot
better by the time this episodeairs. Hopefully, yeah.
(02:21):
Hopefully. We have Bowie on thetable underneath my mic right
now. I know y'all probablymissed him. And if you're
watching this, you can see him.
Bowie had a rough week lastweek, which we'll talk about in
our Two Girls, One pub sectionthat we're bringing back for the
(02:42):
week, bringing it back for theweek. Yes. Oh, it's like he knew
like we knew he's up here.
That's why he fought his way upto be here today. Oh, happy day.
Happy day. Yes. And I know thisis gonna air after you're back
from Miami. But you are about togo on a trip to Miami.
Shove (03:02):
Yes. I'm going to Miami for endless summer. It wasn't
planned to super fast. Itliterally just got thrown
together. And they were like,you want to go to the Miami and
I was like, yeah, and theninstantly followed by like, Oh,
shit. What did I miss? You don'tlike to travel alone. You don't
(03:24):
like to go places you've neverbeen before. And you definitely
don't feel right skating placesyou've never skated before,
because of anxiety, which we'lltalk about later.
Rebel (03:34):
Yeah, so that's exciting.
And then I'm going to have aweekend by myself, which I think
I'm going to take that time todo some self reflection, right?
You'll just find 1000 projects,and 1000 projects. Hey, we all
have coping mechanisms, right?
Yeah, that's mine. For sure. Mytherapist says that I should
(03:57):
probably get other copingmechanisms. Anyways, do you want
to jump right into it? Oh,Leslie. Oh, okay, first off we
got an ad. Babe, guess what? Ijust put up on juice of the
queers.com What I saw youopening a big box the other day?
(04:20):
Well, it's actually a fewthings. I got more colors of the
dangle rollerski earrings. Ihave red, silver, gold, pink
glitter, green and whitepearlized and iridescent.
Unknown (04:34):
Oh my god sounds amazing. And also UK and also
soft key chains. Kitchens. LikeI always call them yes kitchen.
Yes. With cue heartand star clasps, claps clasps.
Its masks all over. Wow, thatsounds so good. hill they are
(04:59):
but that's not all. I also gotnew pride skate laces.
Rebel (05:05):
We like rainbows like it could be pride all the time.
Well, yes, I do have those but Ialso have ones with a gay by Pan
non binary trans ace and lesbianflag stripes on them. I know
it's like the best talk aboutinclusivity I know. I'm so
(05:27):
stoked about it's like theperfect laces to have in my
shop. Settle and amazing pridemoments while skating.
Unknown (05:36):
He he he sometimes you say that he you get cheers to
the queers calm. Ye. It's likemy version of bet. But it's he
Rebel (05:53):
also liked to eat, eat, like to go eat. Eat. Eat. Yeah,
so anyways, yeah. So if you'requeer, or if you're not queer,
and you have some queer friends,head on over cheers to the
queers.com.com for some clearathletes. Yep. And they're here.
(06:17):
They're up now. Alright, so youwant to head on over to the real
world?
Unknown (06:36):
The real world where we talk about the real shit. The
ships?
Rebel (06:42):
No, we're not going to talk about this. today. Maybe we
can make that into a differentepisode. But that's definitely
not going to be what we'retalking about today. All right,
these little depression. Yay.
Yay. The season to be tears. I.
I mean, like, so I think it'sfunny that there's like seasonal
(07:05):
depression because like, I feellike I'm depressed all the time.
But like, also, it getsamplified because of all the
darkness. You hear thesestories? What pupil in the
Northwest, and he wouldn't sayNorth East, but it's Northwest.
Yeah. I mean, isn't it anywhere?
Like that's pretty north fromthe equator. Yeah. But like when
(07:28):
you think of like Seattle, it'slike, just constantly, like dark
and rainy and gloomy. And like,what's it called? Alaska? Days
of Darkness? Yeah, the worst. Solike, all that lack of vitamin D
or just like always swimming.
Like it's an Endless Night.
Yeah, that affects people. Yeah,definitely. I know that. There's
(07:50):
like studies that demonstratethe impact that it has on your
psyche. So yeah, I just thoughtthat it's like, I feel like it
shouldn't really impact us asmuch because all it is, is it
just gets darker earlier, but Ifeel like it's the holidays.
It's triggering. Yeah, it's likea mixture of the I feel like
(08:10):
also like, when it gets dark atfour or five o'clock. I'm like,
What's the point the day isover? Like, I don't want to do
anything else. I'm done. That'show I feel. Um, no, I could see
that. Um, it's just like peoplethat are telling make lady press
start having depressive likeepisodes or seeming depressed or
(08:33):
being depressed like During thesame year. I wonder like, how
does that make you feel as likea depressed person? fine as long
as people aren't just like, ohand sunny have has a holiday is
it's like, no, like, there'slike, Oh my God. I don't know. I
(08:53):
have like no energy. I have nolust for life. I've just like
what's the point? Then? I'mlike, sup homie? What's up fam?
Unknown (09:03):
Welcome. I'm gonna make a suicide pact. No
sorry. I know people get awkwardI say stuff like that because
they know I actually advise butyou got a lot to keep from
crying people. Let's roll let'sI got glitter tears on my face
for today.
Rebel (09:18):
So do you have seasonal depression?
Shove (09:21):
I did only because like, I think it's like holiday base,
which is seasonal or whatever. Ialso get depressed in February.
So like, that's my seasonal likemy personal seasonal depression
because I think when you thinkof life, like Life is like
seasons like it's the time ofyour life is a different season.
Rebel (09:42):
You also have oh my gosh, was it called? It's like PTSD in
a way aware like your body kindof stores the pain so like,
let's say you got dumped or youexperienced like some kind of
like trash Do you like a parentdying or a friend like someone
(10:03):
dying in your life those closeto you? So exactly, you're
later. It's like, all of asudden, you might start feeling
like off and weird and like notmaking the best choices and
like, not able to concentrateand like crying for no reason.
And you're not really thinkingabout why. And then you look at
the date and you're like, Oh,shit. And this is like your body
stores that your mind does, eventhough you're not like
(10:24):
consciously thinking about it.
So that could be like yourseasonal depression. Like I
know, like, typical seasonaldepression is like, it's
wintertime. It's dark. It's theholidays. It's depressing, but I
think like, seasonal can belike, that's your season for
depression. Yeah, I mean, like,think about all the people who
started feeling all sorts ofweird and fuckin like crazy.
(10:44):
This last March, April timeperiod, it's because all of us
have this, like, trauma that weexperience when the pandemic
started, and like a year came upon that, and all of our bodies
were like, Oh, my God, what'sgoing on? No, definitely. It's,
it's there. And then it's almostweird because it's like this
(11:08):
every year because we'reseasonal depression make the
next year worse because of theway you acted and what you went
through. Like it's compoundingon itself. You just self
triggering yourself. I mean,it's possible. I don't know.
Like, yeah, like, Oh, yeah. Lastyear, seasonal depression was so
bad, then you're like nervousabout the following year.
Unknown (11:31):
There's anything about the holidays make you depressed?
Are you everything? I know,you're a Christmas person?
Rebel (11:38):
No, yeah, the holidays don't make me depressed. I
actually really like theholidays. And like time has gone
by enough where I feel empoweredto separate myself from
situations that I don't want tobe in. Or like, I can be in
those situations for a shortamount of time. And then I've
compensated with so many otherlike, good, fun activities, that
(12:00):
it's not like, negative for meanymore. It's just like, this is
a blip. This is something like Ihave to do. And then you know,
Shove (12:09):
yeah, Thanksgiving always feels like to me, because
Thanksgiving was always like,some shit went down. Like it was
always like, someone got toodrunk. And then there was a
fight. And then everyone hatedeach other. I had to chase
someone out of the house andconvince him to come home. Like
it was always something. So forme, it's like always like,
what's gonna go wrong, or it'sgonna be annoying and had to be
(12:32):
forced to be around people Idon't want to be around. So
like, That's always how I seeThanksgiving. And like, this was
the first year in a minute thatlike, will the first time ever
to be like, I invited my dadover to like the Thanksgiving
brunch, that rebel hose. And forme, it was doable, because he
wasn't sitting next to me. Wedidn't really talk that much.
(12:54):
But even when we do, it's likesmall talk. But like my dad can
be triggering for me. But like,this time, it was like, I'm
grateful because it was like,all pretty much good experience.
Like there weren't any like,side passive aggressive comments
mean, it was just like goodthings. And like he even said,
like, oh, like you have somegood people in your life. So
(13:16):
that was cool. And so I thinklike, that was nice to know that
it doesn't have to be like, mydad's constantly a trigger for
me. Like, I remember, the onlything is like, he saw a picture
of like, Mom, my mom, like inthe kitchen. And he's like, Oh,
do you have any other pictures?
Your mom and I showed them? Andit's like, I don't want to talk
about my mom during theholidays, like on a holiday. And
that was the only thing it'sjust like, I get it you bond.
(13:38):
You like to bring my mom becauseyou know, like, that's our one
connection. But like,
Rebel (13:45):
yeah, yeah, that's hard.
Yeah, no, no, like, I alwaysjust think like, Oh, I do miss
some of the happy memories inthe holidays with like, I don't
know, like, colleagues were justso fucked for like, more of my
life than not. Yeah, that makessense. I feel like for me, like
when I became an adult, theholidays were something that I
got to claim ownership overwhich I really liked that and I
(14:06):
felt like that was part of theprocess of me coming into my own
was me like creating my ownholiday traditions. So I know
that when you started dating me,you probably notice like, wow,
this girl has a lot of randomlike holiday traditions, but
they aren't like with anyone perse. Like they're just like
things I like to do. And whoeveris around me, I like make do
(14:27):
them with me. And I feel likethat's my way of like recreating
like creating something happyfor myself during the holidays
because I don't necessarily lovegoing home to my family. And
that's not something that I lookforward to and so yeah
(14:56):
yeah, inside and I think I thinkwhat you were talking about
earlier, yours is a reallyimportant point, like, seasonal
depression doesn't have to justbe like during the holiday
seasons.
Unknown (15:08):
It can be any point in your life where you're kind of
like, I'm not so stoked rightnow, I
Rebel (15:15):
don't really know why.
But it's just like, a few monthsor a month or a few weeks or
something where you're just kindof like, yeah,
Shove (15:25):
I guess we're not happy.
And that's okay. Yeah, I likefor one time, I've purposely had
something really depressinghappened to me. And like, I had
to schedule the appointment.
Like, I've put it in mydepressive month. Like, I was
like, I might as well be like,in the same time, because I
thought, it's better to havelike a boom, boom, boom in a row
(15:48):
of bad stuff and like, have likeit spread. We were like, That's
so depressing. I was like,actually, I failed to go.
Unknown (15:56):
Or like, actually, I'm just consolidating it all into
one time frame, a beautiful boxof fucked up shit with a pretty
bow on it that's just kepttogether.
Rebel (16:07):
Yeah. So seasonal depression, I think is very
real. I also think that thereare just times when life doesn't
work out for you. And you know,that's okay. And that's the way
life works sometimes. That's howI feel. I definitely definitely
had like a seasonal depressionwhen I fucking broke my leg.
(16:30):
Yeah, well, but I think that'sdifferent to talking about. I'm
not seasonal depression. Yeah.
It's not like every year that'sjust like, I that's injured. And
I got depressed. Yeah, that'strue. Yeah, I don't know if
there's a specific seasonal. Ifeel like for me, there's no
predicting my depression.
Unknown (16:52):
I don't know. Have you?
Have you noticed any pattern forme? Now? They're like, pretty,
like, something that I wreckedthat like gets like, well, of
course, you should act that way.
Rebel (17:05):
Then you get depressed?
Like, you're not like a I'mdepressed for no reason. If you
might think so. But it's usuallylike pretty like, that makes
sense. Yeah, it makes burnoutmakes you depressed. Yeah. You
know, I mean, like, I feel likethere's no reason but I guess
you seeing it from the outsidethat makes sense that you have
noticed that like, there is areason. Yeah. You don't just
(17:28):
like wake up one day. And it'slike yeah, I mean, I do feel
like that is it, but it doesmake sense that it's probably
just like, me being depressedbecause I burned myself out.
Because there's actually like,just no reason.
Unknown (17:51):
Yeah. Or you get like, overwhelmed. Like there's and
then like, a lot of times it'slike, ah, and then they're good.
Yeah. And then you have likesome lingering like depression,
but it's like, you're prettylike good at coping, or like
climbing out of it.
Rebel (18:08):
Yeah. You Don't wallow?
Yeah. Cuz I hate the feeling ofbeing depressed. And I think
also I like, because of the waymy mom was, and like, how much
she struggled with depressionstruggles with depression. Like
I it overwhelms me. Yeah. When Istart feeling that because I see
(18:33):
like, just how bad it gets forher and I get scared that that's
gonna be me. So like, it's like,all of my everything inside of
me goes into like high alertmode. As soon as I start, like
going down that tunnel, and I'mlike muscle muscle must stop
immediately.
Unknown (18:56):
I don't know. i That's how I feel anyways. Yeah, I get
that. Yeah, I think like, aslong as I didn't become an
alcoholic, I wouldn't be at asbad as my mom. And it definitely
like blew her. We thought it wascalled manic depressive back
there back then. But
Shove (19:15):
now it's bipolar. It's like, things add up now. Like,
sometimes she would get drunk,like be really depressed and
like how these nightmares andthen just like cry and like
stuff like that. But usuallywe'll just be drunk. And I think
that kind of like, helped herjust like keep going in order to
blackout. So you wouldn't reallynotice the depression too much.
(19:35):
But the alcohol would also feellike her manic episodes which
now I understand where manicepisodes like one time. I was
like, super obvious. And she hada checkbook you know, everyone
wrote checks back then becauseit was like early 2000s. And she
picked me and my friend, my bestfriend and took us the hot topic
(19:59):
and buttoned up Not just me, butmy friend like Gotham, Marilyn
Manson looking boots, and likevinyl trench coats. And when we
got core sets and fish nets, shewrote bad checks there then we
went to torrid and she bought mea core set and a cute skirt and
like, all this stuff, wroteanother bad check there. And
(20:20):
then we just like went and thenlike, it took a dark turn on the
way home, I was just like, Oh,now she's going to a dark place.
Then I was like, embarrassed,but like me and my friend had
like, hundreds of dollars worthof new swag. So it was like fun.
I'm like, I always remember thatlike moments thinking that like,
oh, like when I was drunk. It'sreally fun until it's not.
Rebel (20:40):
Yeah, and now it's like, understanding my illness more.
It's like, holy shit. Of course.
She was. Cool. Yeah, like, Thatmakes so much sense. Yeah, um, I
also think like, oh my god,writing bad checks is the worst
idea because it literally hasyour full name and address on
it. When I got a job there yearslater, I was all worried. I was
like, Oh, my mommy's like, Oh,yeah. When they were like,
(21:05):
training me about like checksand how to run checks. Like,
yeah, you see a lot of badchecks, and I'll let you run the
check through this. Sounds likedon't say anything? Yeah, like,
it's a secret. Was one of them.
You're like, at the likeChristmas party for your work.
And
Unknown (21:23):
you're like, Oh, wow. I mean, tell you a secret about
me. Stupid. It's like two truthsand a lie. Oh, my God. Okay,
anyways, um,
Rebel (21:40):
how do you deal with seasonal depression? How do I
deal with seasonal depression?
How do the people how should thedoctor rebel, Dr. Rebel, um, I
think that you should try andget your thoughts out of your
head somehow. So like, whetherthat is whatever method that you
prefer, I think that that's howyou should try and get your
(22:02):
thoughts out of your head. Youknow, like, my therapist has me
record videos talking, like tothe camera, because I'm a verbal
processor. And so when I feelsuper depressed, and super just
like, overwhelmed, or anything,she like, she like tells me to
just like, go and record it andthen deleted afterwards, but
(22:25):
like, it helps me get it out ofmy head. And that makes me feel
a little bit better. But I thinkthat that method doesn't work
for everyone. Some people likewriting work, some people doing
like art works. Some people likecalling someone and bitching
like that, that works. And Ithink some people like whatever
coping mechanism you have. Andif you don't have a coping
(22:49):
mechanism, find one becauseliterally, if you don't have a
coping mechanism,
Shove (22:57):
it will be mechanisms. I had a bad connotation until I
started therapy. And I was like,What do you mean? That's okay.
Like things that you think arelike really bad coping
mechanisms like unhealthy? Youplan on is better, because what
would happen without thosecoping mechanisms is far worse.
Like,
Rebel (23:13):
yeah, my therapist, actually, this is probably gonna
really, I don't know why I feellike I'm about to cry right now.
I'm fine. I promise. I'mdepression. Yeah, I don't know.
But like, my therapistsliterally told me, because I
always thought the fact that Iwould like drive, and then blast
my music super, super loud. Andthen like, scream, yell, all the
(23:34):
words. Like I always thoughtthat that was kind of unhealthy,
maybe like that. I shouldn't bedoing that. And she was like,
No, that's super healthy. Andthat's great. You should do
that. And why haven't you donethat in a while. And I was like,
because I'm stuck at homebecause I isolate myself when
I'm fucking depressed. Andthat's what I've been doing
recently is just like stayinghome. And like, just not going
(23:57):
anywhere. And, and then she toldme like, there are times when
like, I'm going to know that I'mgoing to be depressed, kind of
like seasonal depression. Thisis actually like, the reason
why, why I wanted to talk aboutthis today because my therapist
like handed it in to me thisweek, but therapy giving us
topics for escape date, thanks.
But like, she was saying thatthere are going to be times when
(24:21):
I know that things are going tobe bad. And when I know that
things are going to be bad, Ishould preemptively start
coping. So like, instead of justgoing and like driving and like
screaming loud to music, whenI'm in that moment that that's
more like, Oh, I forgot what shecalls it, but lo she call it
crisis mode. Like just insteadof just dealing when you're in
(24:45):
crisis mode, to like startcoping with how you know you're
going to feel ahead of time. Andthat kind of blew my mind
because I didn't really everthink of that like why would I
cope like beforehand, but She'slike, if you know that things
are gonna get bad during acertain month like, like, for
example, when when like shoveseasonal depression gets bad in
(25:06):
February, like, it's really hardfor me to. And so she was like
in February or before Februarylike you should know, February's
coming and you should starttaking care of yourself first.
So like you should start like,you know screaming and listening
to music before you feel, youknow, sad or you know, you're
empathizing or whatever. And Iwas like, Oh, that makes sense.
(25:29):
And she's like, before, if youever realize like that, there's
gonna be a time if you notice apattern, or maybe your partner
or your best friend or yourparents, like, they notice
patterns in you. And they, youknow, say to you, you know,
like, oh, during June, you tendto like struggle or whatever.
Like, maybe there's a way oflike, taking care of yourself,
kind of like putting somepadding around you before you
(25:51):
enter that season. Nice. I don'tknow, what do you think?
Unknown (25:57):
Go to your hardware store and get the sunlight
bulbs, because it's almost likedaylight.
Rebel (26:04):
That's what we did stretch our LED lights and
stretch out that light. So it'snot all dark and gloomy. If you
feel like he gets really bad,please seek help. Yeah, call for
help call for a friend to comeover. Just don't be alone. Yeah,
reach out for help. Yeah, Ithink like, admitting to
(26:25):
yourself, and then allowing,like, I think admitting yourself
that you're going through whatyou're going through as
important, because I think for along time, like I compared
myself to other people in mylife, or that I had grown up
with, and like theirexperiences. And so for me, all
(26:48):
of these different, like mentalillnesses still feel like I'm
gonna cry. All of thesedifferent mental illnesses, like
have a person attached to them.
For me, so like, you know,different mental illnesses are
connected to like my grandma, orlike my mom, or like my brother.
And for me, like, I never feltlike I had any of those things
(27:11):
because I was different thanlike, my mom, or my brother or
my grandma. And so, like,accepting the fact that I also
struggle with those things, butthat it's different. And that
that's okay. And that, like myexperience can be similar and
(27:31):
different to theirs. I think wasreally important for me. When
she's crying, I know I don'tknow why I'm crying. I like I've
had such an emotional week. Andthen like, you like the audio
sucks on this YouTube thisfuckin this podcast right now.
Because my recording has stoppedworking like 10 times. Yeah,
(27:55):
because I think that my laptopis dying. Which is so annoying.
Like, just so annoying. Of allthe things to happen like I just
would like my everything to justwork. Yeah, I don't have to
replace more things. Yeah,that's overwhelming. Anyways,
(28:16):
let me get the fuck out of thereal world. Yeah, let's leave
this place. I hate it here No,we'll weld the wheel world where
(28:38):
we're talking about skating inxiety. Skating anxiety. We
talked about it before maybe wejust touch base on it. No, we
like talked about general likenot wanting to skate around
episode of anxiety. Yeah.
anxiety, anxiety? No. Like, inseason two episode, I think like
(29:06):
37 or something like that. Okay,so yes. I know we're going to
change the approach that we taketo skate date next year. But of
all the roller skates, gamingpodcasts that are active, we're
the longest lasting and the mostconsistent even though we
haven't been very consistentrecently, which makes us the
(29:27):
fools. Okay, so do you ever haveskinny in xiety all the time. Oh
my god, I have so much gettinganxiety because you broke your
leg and smashed your teeth in orlike even before that, even
before that I have always I havealways had skating anxiety. When
I was playing derby. I used tolike feel sick before I went to
(29:49):
even just regular practice,especially when scrimmaging was
involved. Every time I go to theskate park, I have major skating
anxiety every time I Go to therink. I have skating anxiety
every time I skate with anyonewho's even kind of better than
me at skating, who isn't like inmy very close circle, I have
(30:09):
anxiety. Like really good athiding that. Oh, thank you. But
yeah, I do feel intense anxietyabout skating. Specifically,
because I know this is somethingthat we've talked about like,
like, we should not do or feelthis, but like, I still feel
(30:29):
like I should be better than Iam at skating at this point. And
I know that that is stupid. Andthat is, like, there's no
substance behind that. And thenthere's no logic behind it. And
I have to keep telling myselfthat, because I know it's not
real. But it still is the like,little like, devil that creeps
(30:51):
into my head to say thosethings. You know, the devil.
Yeah, the literal devil creepsinto my head and says, You suck.
I don't have the hole. Like forme, it's not like that, like, I
should be better where I am.
Because like, I know, I'm justlike,
Shove (31:09):
I would have to practice more like I am where I am.
Because that's where I am. Like,I don't put in the work. Because
like, for me, it's just like,ski to ski. Like, I don't want
to be the best or like, there'sall things I want to learn here
and there. But for me, like, Ijust like to ski to ski and for
the community. So like, I don'tfeel like I need to be the
master at something. So I'mpeople like past me. I'm like,
(31:31):
that's cool. Whatever. For me,it's more like, if I'm having an
off day, especially if I getanxious and like, my body's we
trained me and I'm like, I can'tI literally can't skate right
now I have noodle legs. I'moverwhelmed. And then like, the
fear of having like someone thatlooks up to me on the internet,
or something like seeing mewhile I'm skating like that, or
(31:52):
I mean, like breakdown. That'swhat makes me nervous. It's just
like, Oh, great. Now people aregonna think I can't even skate
on that, like, everything's alie that scares me. And like,
that gives me more anxiety thanthe idea of like, not being as
good as other people that aresomewhere.
Rebel (32:09):
I don't think that it's the idea of not being as good as
people. For me. I think Imiscommunicated that, what I
feel is a pressure to perform.
So yeah, that's what kind ofwhat I'm talking about. Yeah,
like, I feel like a pressure Ithink, especially because like
on my Youtube, like, I teachpeople how to skate. And I think
(32:31):
I feel like I should be betterthan I am at skating in general,
in order to be like teaching allthese people how to skate. And
so I struggle with beingsomewhere and feeling like I
should be, you know, to acertain standard, and then like,
(32:51):
not hitting that standard. Andthat causes me to not want to go
out and skate very often. Yeah.
And that sucks, because I don'tthink that that should exist.
Like, I think that that shouldbe a non a non issue, you know,
Mm hmm. And I don't even know,per se that anyone expects me to
(33:15):
like perform at a certainstandard when I go to the skate
park, or when I go to the rinkor anything, but, and I'm not
nervous about like falling ormessing up or any of that. I
think it's just that like,sometimes I literally just don't
know what to do. And I'mskating. And that gives me
anxiety. I wish that I hadexactly what I was supposed to
(33:37):
do. But then that kind ofdestroys the point of like
flowing and skating, I have tolike warm up and get comfortable
at first. So like when I'm liketoday, the photo shoot, like I
have that warm up period. And Iwas on the ramp with like any
safety gear. So I get likereally hesitant. So when the
photographer was here, like Ididn't really do anything, and I
(33:59):
fell out of it. Because I wasn'tlike in that confident like, Oh,
I'm just like vibing I'm justskating right now. And then like
rebel took some pictures of mewith her phone later. And I was
like, wow, like, I'm doing somuch better. And this is like,
what I wanted to convey in thislike photo shoot. And then now I
just felt like crap, because I'mlike, I should have given that
energy to my friend slashphotographer. And I did it. So I
(34:21):
feel like oh, I wasted her time.
And then that made me feel badbecause it's like, it's like a
photo shoot for a skate thing.
And then I feel like people aregonna see these pictures and be
like, she's just a model inskates. When like, I definitely
know how to be in movement. Andthen so like, that just made me
stand out like, oh, no, like thesame thing like the, like
(34:42):
anxiety because like you feellike you need to perform.
Shove (34:46):
Yeah, Mm hmm. But yeah, relate to that. And just like,
sometimes I wonder if like, theanxiety gets worse when I'm
skating or like anyone really isbecause you're exercising So
your bloods already pumpingfaster. So if you already have
slight anxiety, like, I wonderif that's just heightening it
(35:07):
more. So like, you know, like,sometimes I think about that,
like, you're already, likemoving really fast and like, is
that hoping? Or is that makingyou more anxious? Because, like,
fight or flight alreadyactivated? Yeah, for sure. But
yeah, so it's like reallyimportant for me like, I think
I've talked about it beforelike, like get to my destination
(35:27):
sometimes it just like, do somebreathing or like chill out for
a second and then go in. Becausesometimes like if I go like
socially when I used to skate bymyself at our old place, like
walk into portfolio or notportfolios into the library, the
coffee shop, not the book place.
I would skate there and one timelike, I would try to skate right
in and then instantly almostfall, and then not be able to
(35:49):
like order when I wantedproperly. What happens to me
when I get anxious, it's like,super embarrassing, and like,
sometimes it seems like a normalconversation, but I forget
words, or I replace words withdifferent words. And then
sometimes people laugh becausethey don't really know what's
going on. And then I feelstupid, and they don't want to
talk anymore. So I closed downbecause it's definitely like one
(36:12):
of those things. And I'm justlike, Oh, crap, like you
literally can't talk right now.
And it's definitely feels likethat thing that's getting kind
of worse lately, too. But so nowlike, or then I started skating
and then there was a littleOllie and I would stop there and
like just kind of chill for asecond like listen to a whole
song and then go in. It'd belike a way better experience and
(36:34):
going from skating straightthere. Stopping and it'd be like
Rebel (36:40):
everyone's staring at me, I feel on edge, blah, blah, then
going in and trying to act likea normal human just like order a
stupid fruit tart and a coffee.
Like giving myself a chance tolike catch my breath fully
relax, let adrenaline's on goingfrom like street skating, and
then go in like cutting restart,that would help. Yeah, I feel
like for me, I It's verydependent on the people that I'm
(37:02):
around. Like, it's verydependent on the people I'm
around. Like, if there's evenone person that I'm not
comfortable with it, like, allthe comfort goes out the door.
And so I feel like when I'maround, like, for example, when
I'm around Estro. Like I feeltotally fine, even though like
(37:22):
they're obviously significantlybetter at skating than me, but I
don't feel intimidated. I don'tfeel weird. I don't feel
anything like that when I'maround them. Because, like,
they're so close. And so likethat comfort level is there. But
like anyone else that was to belike better than me or like,
(37:43):
that I don't have a report withI just feel like I kind of like
just act kind of weird. Like Idon't like I almost stopped
wanting to skate which like, Ihate that. I don't want to not
want to skate like I want tojust want to skate. And even if
I want to skate, it's like I getthere. And then I like oh, man,
(38:05):
no, I don't want to skate. Andit's like, that sucks. It does.
I wonder if more people feelthat way? Probably right? Or
it's just like, there's like ashit ton of people that are good
skating. And I'm just like,great. I'm still in the way now.
And like, sometimes I'll belike, Wait, actually, they're
very supportive. So I'm gonna domy whatever. And they'll cheer
me on. And I'm like, cool, butlike, he gets like, Oh, now
(38:25):
there's six people. Very good.
I'll be like, I'll go ski on theother side of the park. Because
I'm just like, I'm just waste. Ifeel like I'm just wasting
people's time going in and doingwhatever little shady line or
run I want to do. But it was afleet. I was cooling somewhere.
(38:48):
And now I'm was and will it comeback? I can. Go ahead. Yeah. So
I feel like for me, anotherthing that gives me anxiety is
like, whenever people will,like, try and get me to do
something. Like if someone'strying to teach me something. I
(39:09):
really like that. But I also itreally gives me anxiety because
I feel like if I don'taccomplish it, then I have
failed them. And I've wastedtheir time.
Shove (39:20):
A lot of times I actually skate better when like I'm
around people I don't knowbecause that feeling of like I
have something to prove. So. Solike at rollouts, like even
though usually like even likeit's a physical thing to like,
let's say I normally a littleget tired and like wanna break
or like my back hurts. All of asudden when I'm leading a
(39:40):
rollout it's like what backpain? What blah, blah just like
writing pure adrenaline and Ijust like can do the whole
fucking thing and I'm just like,Yeah, I did it. And usually in
the front by myself because it'sjust being surrounded by other
people in the back. But um, I'mgoing to Miami as I mentioned
earlier to me This summer, andI'm nervous because like, I
(40:03):
always get weird about skating,like, straighten her been on
like, I don't know if I cantrust like, I have to trust the
neighborhood. I gotta trust theground. I got to know. Can I
skate in the street? Because Idon't like sidewalks. How are
the drivers out here? Am I gonnalike just get like fucked with
or they're gonna treat me like abicycle and I'll be safe like,
why are there a lot of potholes?
Like if I take this? Is there ahill right around the corner? Is
(40:26):
this Phil even safe to bomb? Ordoes it have random fucking
holes in it? These are things Ineed a noticeable safe so I tend
to like really BB skate in newplaces because I don't know if I
can trust it. And especially ifsome nightscape and I'm going to
Miami I'm like on night one likeit's a night skate. And like
knowing that, like I was able tolook up and be like, Okay,
(40:50):
that's a part look smooth, but Ithink it's gonna go into the
street. And I don't knowanything about that. And like,
I'm one of those people asked meoverprepared, so I like looked
up the skate park, we're goingto, I looked up the park, we're
starting the rollout. Like Iwant all this information, so I
can feel more secure, becauseI'm not big on just going to a
new place without anyinformation. And now it's like,
(41:11):
I also need to skate and just belike, this is fine. And like, it
makes me feel weird. Yeah,that's totally nerve wracking.
Yeah, but I'm just hoping thefact that like, he'll be like,
well, there's people I don'tknow, here. Like, I'll just push
through it. Just do it. Like,I'm going with people I do know.
(41:32):
And like, I've traveled with oneof them before and it went well.
So we'll see. We'll see. Itshould be interesting.
Rebel (41:42):
I think you're gonna do great. I think you'll have fun
and you're gonna do great. Andyeah, you'll feel bad anxiety.
But like, is there somethingthat you can do to help yourself
in the moment with your anxiety?
Drink? Not recommend. No,definitely drinking water
though. Because like when I getanxious, and I'm dehydrated, and
(42:02):
skating, I do throw up.
Shove (42:08):
You seen it? Yeah. Many overwhelmed. You water? Um, so
yeah, I meant drink water, notalcohol. No, but for me, like,
I'm not gonna lie. Like, I know.
It's gonna be like a toughthing. I want to take like a
shot real quick and just belike, who for the nerds like not
like get drunk drunk? So if youdon't have a drinking problem I
(42:28):
recommend maybe not, but not allthe time. That shows bad advice,
I guess. But do you boo boo.
And, um, no, but like,seriously, like, the breathing
really does help. I'll even dolike under my breath. Like I
used to, like, totally hide it.
But now I don't really care ifpeople really notice and I'm
like, breathing slowly, all of asudden, because that's what has
(42:49):
to bring me back to reality andtry to convince myself like, so
key. You're gonna be okay.
You're safe. So I'm really intolike deep breathing, for sure.
Rebel (43:02):
And you like sneak away sometimes. Right? Oh, yeah, just
appear. That's in here. Like hernumber one
Shove (43:09):
tactic. Yeah, the queer prom I just disappeared. So many
times. I was just like, Ihaven't this. Like it was just
like too much time. So I wouldjust go out to the front where
there was literally no one andjust sit there. But then people
started asking questions. Sothen I'd go in, or the
photographer was because no onewas there. And then I'd go to
the dance floor where there wasno one dancing because everyone
(43:30):
was skating. And then like, Ijust would find places like
pockets where there was zeropeople. I love it. Yeah. And
then it's like so nice. Silenceis even better.
Rebel (43:41):
Yeah. Awesome. Any other thoughts about skating anxiety?
So yeah, it's alright, let'smove on over to Two girls, one
pup.
(44:07):
Two girls, one pup, the segmentthat wasn't mentioned by chef in
the beginning. And the rebelsaid, this is boring. We're
running out of things. Boy, he'snot doing anything. I was right.
I had to pandemic yada, yada,yada. And I was like football.
We love him in the memes. Sogood. And she's like, he just
wanted to work, but it can't.
And I was like, fine. So then Iwas like, well ask your skate
date. And then that was great.
And then people hated us andstopped writing. And so now it's
(44:29):
back to two girls one pup, atleast for this episode. So
what's going on with Bowie thisweek, baby? Well, he's melted on
the table with his back legdangling into my lap. Very cute
because he's really needy rightnow because he had surgery last
all drugged up. Yeah, yeah, hehad surgery because he had a
(44:49):
little maths on his eye, andthey had to remove it. And then
he also had to get teeth removedand he got eight teeth removed.
Or guy So yeah, so he's onantibiotics and painkillers and
Benadryl. And yes, we're Kareem.
And he has to wear a cone. Yeah.
(45:10):
So we have a little, a softerCone of Shame for him. Now, it
was really funny when he, whenhe came home, he would just
stand somewhere random and juststare off into space. Like he
was still so high. We were like,Oh, my gosh, was going on. He
was top shivering. It was sortof sad. Sad. So we're like
trying to help him. But youknow, he can't talk. So we're
(45:33):
just trying to do our best toread his body language. And now
we'll take the code off. Andhe's like, laying with us. And I
think like, we have constantvision on him. But he has to
keep the phone on pretty muchfor two weeks, because we don't
want him scraping his stitchesout on his eye. For a little
girl or a little guy eating wetfood because his teeth offices.
(45:54):
Yeah, his birthday was lastweek. So it's 10 He turned 10.
And then he got this bigsurgery. Happy birthday. The
knife and he was like, fine,it's gonna cost you more than
$3,000 He was like, I I want afacelift. Man, so pay for this.
(46:16):
So he was excited. He was like,oh my god, I'm gonna look like a
five year old pup again. Andthen he went to the vet thinking
this is it. I'm getting mybeauty surgery. And then he's
like, cool, like prior to doingeyelift within the he got out.
He's like, What the fuck? Yeah,he was like, you're supposed to
give me straight teeth and notpull my teeth. Yeah, so he's a
(46:39):
little mad at us for that. Buthe's doing well. His he's
starting to finally like try toscratch about i, which is a good
sign because that means it'shealing. Yeah, the doctor didn't
say that. But I know that justfrom all the times I've fallen
false Kadeem. And every timethings heal, they itch. Yeah,
it's that skin growing back.
Yeah. But yeah, so he is doingwell. The doctor said that he
(47:03):
did really well under theanesthesia. And that overall, he
just did really good. So that'sexcellent. And a good little
teeter totter. He is a reallygood potato. So we're proud of
him. But yeah, it was a lot ofmoney. And it was like my enemy.
Let's go out. So if you wouldlike to help with Bowies 1000s
of dollars. And he has to goback again. There's our Venmo
(47:30):
attached. Yeah. Girl skates, andjust right Bowie in there. Yeah,
just right Bowie. So we know.
Even if it's $1 switch. Now youknow why I'm so frustrated about
my computer because we like100,000% can not afford me to
have to get a new laptop. Andit's Christmas. Yeah, we took
(47:55):
our Christmas movie took ourChristmas, but that's we love
you. We want to make sure hedidn't have puppy cancer. And we
wanted to make sure that hewasn't in pain with his teeth,
but also that his bad breathmight have been because of the
bad teeth. Yeah, definitelywatch him still have bad breath.
Probably because he's a dog. No,but like, there's dog breath and
(48:16):
there's a nice belly breath issomething shit in your mouth.
Did it die and then did it shit.
Like, that's literally what itfucking smells like. It's so
yeah, but we love them anyway,we love him very much.
Unknown (48:29):
I would rather smell his butthole than his breath.
I'd rather have his button myface in his face. I'm not even
looking like he's slept No.
Rebel (48:43):
By my face before it smelled nothing. He is and I'm
like, okay, though, but one timeboy. He pooped on my leg, like,
and then another time, he waslike, my mom and I go to pick
him up. And I put my hand on hisbutt and it was just covered. It
was shit. It was so disgusting.
And I was like, oh my god, thisis so gross. But I was like, Oh,
(49:06):
poor guy. And it was also likeso gross. Like weeks apart from
each other. Literally this bothof those things happened like
last month. Yeah. So know whatthat's low. But that's love I
guess so that is literally likebeing a mother to baby human.
But he's very cute. And so now Ising songs to him and we whisper
(49:26):
in his ears even though he can'thear us and we give him your
scratches and lots of cuddleseven more than usual, way more
than usual, which was already alot so like he's never on the
table during a podcast. So youknow, he's been like, I've just
been holding him like he's beenon my shoulder a lot recently.
So he loves us. He loves milkingit for sure. He's for sure
(49:50):
milking it. Like he won't takehis meds with his regular food.
It's like has to be like cheeseor like some other random like
shit yeah, anyways, yeah, sothat's two girls one pup and if
you want to write in for findyour skate date, you can email
us at dear skate date@gmail.com.
(50:12):
Or you can DM us on skate datepod on Instagram. And you would
just send us a picture a shortbio, your handle and your
pronouns and then you we willtalk about you on the podcast
help you find a skate in yourarea. Alright, you want to move
on to deer shovel? Let's do it,okay.
(50:47):
Remember, in Deer shovel, wetalk about questions y'all ask
and then we answer them. So ifyou want to write in a question,
you can either again DM us on atthe skate date pod, or you can
email us at dear skatedate@gmail.com Your questions
starting with your shovel and itcould be about anything at all,
(51:10):
and we will answer it. So. Sotoday's question is, dear
shovel, what are your favoriteholiday traditions? And what are
you most excited about doingthis year? Sincerely a lover of
statements,
Shove (51:28):
my favorite holiday or the past and that'd be
Halloween. So that's my holidayseason. And it was humming a
Halloween party. And it wasgoing out on Halloween. And it
was watching scary movies allmonth. November, whatever
Thanksgiving and Christmas timewith rebel. It's like more fun,
(51:50):
but my only tradition would bewatching like Christmas and
drinking eggnog and watchingRebel open her presents.
Anything else
Rebel (51:58):
I don't care about?
handed over to rebel. And whatare you most excited about doing
this here? Nothing. Nothing.
Different file. I mean, yeah,it's just it's the same thing
(52:19):
every year. And it's like, cool.
Like, I like watching you happyfor my new presence. And it's
not like I'm most excited for.
And then like, I really enjoywatching like Christmas, but I
don't live for it. LikeChristmas is cool. Like I think
and literally even justChristmas like, month like
December. I think I'm just asucker for lights to be honest.
(52:39):
And maybe it's because I did toomuch ecstasy in my early 20s In
my rave days, and I'm like, ooh,shiny lights. But like I just
like that there's lightseverywhere. And it's cute. And I
really like to smell cinnamon.
And I'm happy for y'all to comeand but that's it. See, that was
a good answer. But let's likeI'm not like, Oh my god. Yay.
It's finally Christmas time. Idon't think you have to be like
(53:00):
that in order to have somethingto look forward to. But like
there's a lot of people outthere you that like are so happy
that when it's like finallyholidays. It's like oh my God
finally. Yes. Like you love thedecorating. You love everything.
Yeah, that's true. I'm excitedabout everything. I am excited
(53:22):
to decorate the house and have atree up. I'm excited about
making sugar cookies anddecorating them I'm excited.
Last year was a failure in Vegasfail what even happened? We like
tried to make dinner. And thenthey were like wave to fly. And
(53:44):
we tried to use like a knife.
Yeah. Yeah, it was a disaster. Iremember that now. Good times.
Um, I am looking forward to Iwant to go Christmas caroling on
my skates. I like skatingdowntown Naples and looking at
lights. I like hot drinks. LikeI like drinking hot drinks in
(54:09):
the cold and like doingChristmas activities or like
holiday activities. Like, I wantto go ice skating. And I don't
like making gingerbread houses.
I used to think I liked it. Andthat concept is fun. We did it.
I would feel the same way aboutokay, I feel the same way about
gingerbread house decorating asI do about carving pumpkins. And
(54:29):
that is no, it's a lot of work.
It's a lot of work and it is awaste of time. It is 100% a
waste of time. So I feel thoseare the two I'm sorry if you're
all fans of those twoactivities, but I think those
two activities are the biggestpiles of trash that we've been
(54:51):
told that we're supposed toenjoy but like nobody likes
doing it and then pumpkinsliterally last for like two
days. And then fuck gingerbreadhouses once you make them, they
don't taste good. Becausethey're, they're stale because
they've been sitting out. It'salways, you know, I mean, like
it's a waste of candy. Yeah, thecandy that comes with is never
(55:13):
even good. They know you're notgonna get it and like, and like
the frosting does not work likeyou literally, in order to make
your gingerbread house stand up.
Without wanting to killyourself. You have to use hot
glue, like just period like youjust have to you have to ruin
the fact you have to ruin yourgingerbread house for eating in
order to not want to punch yourginger Remy we also got a really
(55:36):
cheap one so I'm sure there'slike a frosty that does work.
Like we probably just like suckat it. It does not matter the
$10 one from Trader Joe's shouldwork like people aren't glue
getting their gingerbreadhouses. Yeah, well, people also
probably have more time in theirlives. You're just like, sit
(55:56):
there and like what blow onfrosting to make it hard. And
how do you even make it harden?
I don't know. There's noinstruction. That's like, Hold
you just said but like you haveto hold it together for so long.
Like I was successful. We wereboth successful eventually in
like putting our gingerbreadhouse together but like it's not
(56:16):
worth it. And there's neverenough there's never enough of
any like one ingredient to makea consistent pattern. Like
across the house. Oh, are stillgoing no, it's really fucked up.
Wow, so that's my least favoritewhich like the sign rebel
rousers petition to cancel sogingerbread house but don't
(56:39):
cancel like you know, like whenyou go to a you know, those like
Christmas pop up things whereyou like can go into a room and
then it's a life sizedgingerbread house. Don't cancel
those because those areexcellent. I love those existing
decorated already gingerbreadhouses. Oh
cute, that are life size. Okay.
Build your own gingerbreadhouse. No, cancel. I hate that
(56:59):
activity. Also think that itwould be fun this year. This is
what I'm looking. I'm lookingforward to doing Christmas
crafts. So I'm looking forwardto it. So I like to make large
life size lollipops and put themin our yard this year. That is
my goal. Do you think she'll doit? Probably not. I might. I
(57:21):
might do it. Usually, okay.
Every year, I usually make giftsfor everyone. Last year usually
it's either a fail or way toomuch. Last year, I made bath
(57:50):
salts and like, like differentlike, smells and like put them
together and put them in cutelittle tubes and like all this
sort of stuff. I still have thatshit left over. Like I still
have so much freaking bats out.
So if you want to come on over Ishould probably give you I mean
No, like I'm gonna give yousome. There'll be like weird
conversations like someone willbe like, yeah, and then yada
(58:10):
yada yada. And then rebel goes,do a bathtub. Like this is real
shit. Like, they'll be like, allconfused, like, yes, like, Oh,
cool. Here's some bath salts orit's like, no, no, like, and
then just like, oh. And thenthey'll just keep telling their
story like what the hell? I wishthat was an exaggeration, but
(58:34):
that literal conversationshappen at least three times that
I can recall immediately off thetop of my head. I even tried to
pawn some off on someone atThanksgiving brunch this last
joke. Yeah, but it's fine. Yeah,so anyway, so last year I made
bath salts the year before thatI made candles was that the
candle year candles didn't burnthe candles and I made like I
(58:57):
had poured them and everythingand they made the coasters
remember you made jewelryholders marbled and then like
you painted the rim. It was verycute. Because you should have
used Modge Podge that was yeah,I made like little little bowls
(59:19):
made out of like marbled claycuz I like took different clay
and then I like marble thattogether and then I you know
like cooked it and it wasamazing. Yeah, so those are I
don't know whether they're gone.
And then the candles that I madethat year they didn't
Unknown (59:38):
stay lit. So I just gave all these candles everyone.
Nobody said anything. Whichmeans that everyone was very,
very nice.
Rebel (59:47):
Where they just never tried to light their candle
which I doubt so
Unknown (59:52):
Christmas the time of failure. Yeah. Okay, they grow
shitty crafts.
Rebel (59:57):
I don't think that there was anything else you really
Whatever. Anything else beforemy time? Yeah, so good times. Oh
my gosh, yeah. So that's what Ido I fail during the holiday
season. And I'm fine with it.
It's fine with me. I don't havean idea of what to make this
year, so I'm just gonna not.
(01:00:19):
Okay, got it. Yeah. All right.
Well, that was cool. Thank you.
Thanks for going on that rollercoaster ride. That was this
podcast. gingerbread houses,fuck gingerbread houses also
can't believe I cried. And alsosome of this audio is going to
be excellent. And some of it'sgoing to be terrible. So
Unknown (01:00:41):
and also what? Maybe Be on the lookout on a certain
major sports brand YouTubechannel for December 14.
Rebel (01:00:59):
Oh, is you might see me on it. With a famous golf
players nice and a famoussinger. Wow.
Unknown (01:01:10):
That's that's all the hint. Oh, that's exciting. I
love that. Yeah. If you'rewatching on YouTube, and you
think you know where that'll bewhat it is. Here's a head. They
only have black women on it.
Rebel (01:01:26):
When it's on a major sports brand channel. That's.
Yeah, that's a good hint. I lovethat. But yeah, so after that,
just watch for chefs page,because you'll see exciting
stuff dropping there. And yeah,so we hope that you love this
episode of this podcast. This isus at our realest that's why we
(01:01:50):
started making this podcast sowe could be real A F with you
and talk about things thataren't just how to roller skate.
Yeah, and we have about threeweeks until we go on our holiday
hiatus. Yes. And then we'regonna come back with a refreshed
understanding of how we're goingto approach the podcast. Hell
(01:02:11):
yeah. No more burnout. Hellyeah, no burnout. So ways to
support our podcast one youcould give us five stars and and
comment on Apple podcasts. Thatwould be amazing. We'll shout
you out. The next way is thatyou could subscribe to her
YouTube like comment andsubscribe. That third way is to
(01:02:35):
shop at cheers the query calm orfat femme fatale shop, which is
my shop and shop shop. And bydoing that you're supporting us,
which also supports this podcast
Unknown (01:02:47):
and share our podcast with your friends. They'll hate
you for it.
Rebel (01:02:52):
Because they'll either be addicted or they'll be like What
is this nonsense? Thank you somuch for listening and or
watching. We love you so much.
Have a wonderful week and wewill see you next Wednesday
slash Thursday. Yes, yeah.
Welcome to escape de.
What's your favorite podcastwith your favorite couple? Yay.
Yeah, I'm shove I'm rebel.
Together we are. Shovel. Can youdig it? I can. Can you dig it?
That's the question. Welcomeback, y'all. It's another
Wednesday or whatever day it isfinally got edited. Hello.
Rebel (00:35):
Yeah, sorry. I've been on struggle bus, which is why we're
talking about well, we'retalking about today. What are we
talking about? today? We'regoing to talk about seasonal
depression. And then we're alsogoing to talk about skating
anxiety, so buckle on andbecause it's gonna be a wild
ride,
Shove (00:52):
that's fun. Yeah, I don't look like trash today. Yeah, you
look amazing. Yeah, I usuallylook like trash. But that's
because like today, I had aphotoshoot early in the morning.
And so I had some leftovermakeup. And then I just like,
went a little crazy and readyfor recording this. I figured,
why not?
Rebel (01:13):
Yeah. What I am realizing though, is that the light is way
too bright. And I need to turndown the brightness. So give me
one second. Look at that. Youcan tell him block now. Look at
that. We don't look like ghosts.
Amazing. So today, yeah, we'retalking about lots of fun
things. And by fun things. Imean, real shit, because that's
(01:34):
what we do. Here. We talk aboutthe real shit. So how have you
been this last week? Chef? hasbeen alright. Yeah, I use a
cevin to vape. Um, I've been allright. It's Black Friday weekend
through Cyber Monday. And yeah,I think prepping for it was
(01:57):
really crazy. But yeah, yeah,definitely. I feel like it's
been a little bit crazy of aweekend even though it's like,
cool, because you have a 40weekend. So it's been awesome to
have you around more often. ButI've been feeling pretty
stressed. And under pressure. SoI'm I think it'll be a lot
better by the time this episodeairs. Hopefully, yeah.
(02:21):
Hopefully. We have Bowie on thetable underneath my mic right
now. I know y'all probablymissed him. And if you're
watching this, you can see him.
Bowie had a rough week lastweek, which we'll talk about in
our Two Girls, One pub sectionthat we're bringing back for the
(02:42):
week, bringing it back for theweek. Yes. Oh, it's like he knew
like we knew he's up here.
That's why he fought his way upto be here today. Oh, happy day.
Happy day. Yes. And I know thisis gonna air after you're back
from Miami. But you are about togo on a trip to Miami.
Shove (03:02):
Yes. I'm going to Miami for endless summer. It wasn't
planned to super fast. Itliterally just got thrown
together. And they were like,you want to go to the Miami and
I was like, yeah, and theninstantly followed by like, Oh,
shit. What did I miss? You don'tlike to travel alone. You don't
(03:24):
like to go places you've neverbeen before. And you definitely
don't feel right skating placesyou've never skated before,
because of anxiety, which we'lltalk about later.
Rebel (03:34):
Yeah, so that's exciting.
And then I'm going to have aweekend by myself, which I think
I'm going to take that time todo some self reflection, right?
You'll just find 1000 projects,and 1000 projects. Hey, we all
have coping mechanisms, right?
Yeah, that's mine. For sure. Mytherapist says that I should
(03:57):
probably get other copingmechanisms. Anyways, do you want
to jump right into it? Oh,Leslie. Oh, okay, first off we
got an ad. Babe, guess what? Ijust put up on juice of the
queers.com What I saw youopening a big box the other day?
(04:20):
Well, it's actually a fewthings. I got more colors of the
dangle rollerski earrings. Ihave red, silver, gold, pink
glitter, green and whitepearlized and iridescent.
Unknown (04:34):
Oh my god sounds amazing. And also UK and also
soft key chains. Kitchens. LikeI always call them yes kitchen.
Yes. With cue heartand star clasps, claps clasps.
Its masks all over. Wow, thatsounds so good. hill they are
(04:59):
but that's not all. I also gotnew pride skate laces.
Rebel (05:05):
We like rainbows like it could be pride all the time.
Well, yes, I do have those but Ialso have ones with a gay by Pan
non binary trans ace and lesbianflag stripes on them. I know
it's like the best talk aboutinclusivity I know. I'm so
(05:27):
stoked about it's like theperfect laces to have in my
shop. Settle and amazing pridemoments while skating.
Unknown (05:36):
He he he sometimes you say that he you get cheers to
the queers calm. Ye. It's likemy version of bet. But it's he
Rebel (05:53):
also liked to eat, eat, like to go eat. Eat. Eat. Yeah,
so anyways, yeah. So if you'requeer, or if you're not queer,
and you have some queer friends,head on over cheers to the
queers.com.com for some clearathletes. Yep. And they're here.
(06:17):
They're up now. Alright, so youwant to head on over to the real
world?
Unknown (06:36):
The real world where we talk about the real shit. The
ships?
Rebel (06:42):
No, we're not going to talk about this. today. Maybe we
can make that into a differentepisode. But that's definitely
not going to be what we'retalking about today. All right,
these little depression. Yay.
Yay. The season to be tears. I.
I mean, like, so I think it'sfunny that there's like seasonal
(07:05):
depression because like, I feellike I'm depressed all the time.
But like, also, it getsamplified because of all the
darkness. You hear thesestories? What pupil in the
Northwest, and he wouldn't sayNorth East, but it's Northwest.
Yeah. I mean, isn't it anywhere?
Like that's pretty north fromthe equator. Yeah. But like when
(07:28):
you think of like Seattle, it'slike, just constantly, like dark
and rainy and gloomy. And like,what's it called? Alaska? Days
of Darkness? Yeah, the worst. Solike, all that lack of vitamin D
or just like always swimming.
Like it's an Endless Night.
Yeah, that affects people. Yeah,definitely. I know that. There's
(07:50):
like studies that demonstratethe impact that it has on your
psyche. So yeah, I just thoughtthat it's like, I feel like it
shouldn't really impact us asmuch because all it is, is it
just gets darker earlier, but Ifeel like it's the holidays.
It's triggering. Yeah, it's likea mixture of the I feel like
(08:10):
also like, when it gets dark atfour or five o'clock. I'm like,
What's the point the day isover? Like, I don't want to do
anything else. I'm done. That'show I feel. Um, no, I could see
that. Um, it's just like peoplethat are telling make lady press
start having depressive likeepisodes or seeming depressed or
(08:33):
being depressed like During thesame year. I wonder like, how
does that make you feel as likea depressed person? fine as long
as people aren't just like, ohand sunny have has a holiday is
it's like, no, like, there'slike, Oh my God. I don't know. I
(08:53):
have like no energy. I have nolust for life. I've just like
what's the point? Then? I'mlike, sup homie? What's up fam?
Unknown (09:03):
Welcome. I'm gonna make a suicide pact. No
sorry. I know people get awkwardI say stuff like that because
they know I actually advise butyou got a lot to keep from
crying people. Let's roll let'sI got glitter tears on my face
for today.
Rebel (09:18):
So do you have seasonal depression?
Shove (09:21):
I did only because like, I think it's like holiday base,
which is seasonal or whatever. Ialso get depressed in February.
So like, that's my seasonal likemy personal seasonal depression
because I think when you thinkof life, like Life is like
seasons like it's the time ofyour life is a different season.
Rebel (09:42):
You also have oh my gosh, was it called? It's like PTSD in
a way aware like your body kindof stores the pain so like,
let's say you got dumped or youexperienced like some kind of
like trash Do you like a parentdying or a friend like someone
(10:03):
dying in your life those closeto you? So exactly, you're
later. It's like, all of asudden, you might start feeling
like off and weird and like notmaking the best choices and
like, not able to concentrateand like crying for no reason.
And you're not really thinkingabout why. And then you look at
the date and you're like, Oh,shit. And this is like your body
stores that your mind does, eventhough you're not like
(10:24):
consciously thinking about it.
So that could be like yourseasonal depression. Like I
know, like, typical seasonaldepression is like, it's
wintertime. It's dark. It's theholidays. It's depressing, but I
think like, seasonal can belike, that's your season for
depression. Yeah, I mean, like,think about all the people who
started feeling all sorts ofweird and fuckin like crazy.
(10:44):
This last March, April timeperiod, it's because all of us
have this, like, trauma that weexperience when the pandemic
started, and like a year came upon that, and all of our bodies
were like, Oh, my God, what'sgoing on? No, definitely. It's,
it's there. And then it's almostweird because it's like this
(11:08):
every year because we'reseasonal depression make the
next year worse because of theway you acted and what you went
through. Like it's compoundingon itself. You just self
triggering yourself. I mean,it's possible. I don't know.
Like, yeah, like, Oh, yeah. Lastyear, seasonal depression was so
bad, then you're like nervousabout the following year.
Unknown (11:31):
There's anything about the holidays make you depressed?
Are you everything? I know,you're a Christmas person?
Rebel (11:38):
No, yeah, the holidays don't make me depressed. I
actually really like theholidays. And like time has gone
by enough where I feel empoweredto separate myself from
situations that I don't want tobe in. Or like, I can be in
those situations for a shortamount of time. And then I've
compensated with so many otherlike, good, fun activities, that
(12:00):
it's not like, negative for meanymore. It's just like, this is
a blip. This is something like Ihave to do. And then you know,
Shove (12:09):
yeah, Thanksgiving always feels like to me, because
Thanksgiving was always like,some shit went down. Like it was
always like, someone got toodrunk. And then there was a
fight. And then everyone hatedeach other. I had to chase
someone out of the house andconvince him to come home. Like
it was always something. So forme, it's like always like,
what's gonna go wrong, or it'sgonna be annoying and had to be
(12:32):
forced to be around people Idon't want to be around. So
like, That's always how I seeThanksgiving. And like, this was
the first year in a minute thatlike, will the first time ever
to be like, I invited my dadover to like the Thanksgiving
brunch, that rebel hose. And forme, it was doable, because he
wasn't sitting next to me. Wedidn't really talk that much.
(12:54):
But even when we do, it's likesmall talk. But like my dad can
be triggering for me. But like,this time, it was like, I'm
grateful because it was like,all pretty much good experience.
Like there weren't any like,side passive aggressive comments
mean, it was just like goodthings. And like he even said,
like, oh, like you have somegood people in your life. So
(13:16):
that was cool. And so I thinklike, that was nice to know that
it doesn't have to be like, mydad's constantly a trigger for
me. Like, I remember, the onlything is like, he saw a picture
of like, Mom, my mom, like inthe kitchen. And he's like, Oh,
do you have any other pictures?
Your mom and I showed them? Andit's like, I don't want to talk
about my mom during theholidays, like on a holiday. And
that was the only thing it'sjust like, I get it you bond.
(13:38):
You like to bring my mom becauseyou know, like, that's our one
connection. But like,
Rebel (13:45):
yeah, yeah, that's hard.
Yeah, no, no, like, I alwaysjust think like, Oh, I do miss
some of the happy memories inthe holidays with like, I don't
know, like, colleagues were justso fucked for like, more of my
life than not. Yeah, that makessense. I feel like for me, like
when I became an adult, theholidays were something that I
got to claim ownership overwhich I really liked that and I
(14:06):
felt like that was part of theprocess of me coming into my own
was me like creating my ownholiday traditions. So I know
that when you started dating me,you probably notice like, wow,
this girl has a lot of randomlike holiday traditions, but
they aren't like with anyone perse. Like they're just like
things I like to do. And whoeveris around me, I like make do
(14:27):
them with me. And I feel likethat's my way of like recreating
like creating something happyfor myself during the holidays
because I don't necessarily lovegoing home to my family. And
that's not something that I lookforward to and so yeah
(14:56):
yeah, inside and I think I thinkwhat you were talking about
earlier, yours is a reallyimportant point, like, seasonal
depression doesn't have to justbe like during the holiday
seasons.
Unknown (15:08):
It can be any point in your life where you're kind of
like, I'm not so stoked rightnow, I
Rebel (15:15):
don't really know why.
But it's just like, a few monthsor a month or a few weeks or
something where you're just kindof like, yeah,
Shove (15:25):
I guess we're not happy.
And that's okay. Yeah, I likefor one time, I've purposely had
something really depressinghappened to me. And like, I had
to schedule the appointment.
Like, I've put it in mydepressive month. Like, I was
like, I might as well be like,in the same time, because I
thought, it's better to havelike a boom, boom, boom in a row
(15:48):
of bad stuff and like, have likeit spread. We were like, That's
so depressing. I was like,actually, I failed to go.
Unknown (15:56):
Or like, actually, I'm just consolidating it all into
one time frame, a beautiful boxof fucked up shit with a pretty
bow on it that's just kepttogether.
Rebel (16:07):
Yeah. So seasonal depression, I think is very
real. I also think that thereare just times when life doesn't
work out for you. And you know,that's okay. And that's the way
life works sometimes. That's howI feel. I definitely definitely
had like a seasonal depressionwhen I fucking broke my leg.
(16:30):
Yeah, well, but I think that'sdifferent to talking about. I'm
not seasonal depression. Yeah.
It's not like every year that'sjust like, I that's injured. And
I got depressed. Yeah, that'strue. Yeah, I don't know if
there's a specific seasonal. Ifeel like for me, there's no
predicting my depression.
Unknown (16:52):
I don't know. Have you?
Have you noticed any pattern forme? Now? They're like, pretty,
like, something that I wreckedthat like gets like, well, of
course, you should act that way.
Rebel (17:05):
Then you get depressed?
Like, you're not like a I'mdepressed for no reason. If you
might think so. But it's usuallylike pretty like, that makes
sense. Yeah, it makes burnoutmakes you depressed. Yeah. You
know, I mean, like, I feel likethere's no reason but I guess
you seeing it from the outsidethat makes sense that you have
noticed that like, there is areason. Yeah. You don't just
(17:28):
like wake up one day. And it'slike yeah, I mean, I do feel
like that is it, but it doesmake sense that it's probably
just like, me being depressedbecause I burned myself out.
Because there's actually like,just no reason.
Unknown (17:51):
Yeah. Or you get like, overwhelmed. Like there's and
then like, a lot of times it'slike, ah, and then they're good.
Yeah. And then you have likesome lingering like depression,
but it's like, you're prettylike good at coping, or like
climbing out of it.
Rebel (18:08):
Yeah. You Don't wallow?
Yeah. Cuz I hate the feeling ofbeing depressed. And I think
also I like, because of the waymy mom was, and like, how much
she struggled with depressionstruggles with depression. Like
I it overwhelms me. Yeah. When Istart feeling that because I see
(18:33):
like, just how bad it gets forher and I get scared that that's
gonna be me. So like, it's like,all of my everything inside of
me goes into like high alertmode. As soon as I start, like
going down that tunnel, and I'mlike muscle muscle must stop
immediately.
Unknown (18:56):
I don't know. i That's how I feel anyways. Yeah, I get
that. Yeah, I think like, aslong as I didn't become an
alcoholic, I wouldn't be at asbad as my mom. And it definitely
like blew her. We thought it wascalled manic depressive back
there back then. But
Shove (19:15):
now it's bipolar. It's like, things add up now. Like,
sometimes she would get drunk,like be really depressed and
like how these nightmares andthen just like cry and like
stuff like that. But usuallywe'll just be drunk. And I think
that kind of like, helped herjust like keep going in order to
blackout. So you wouldn't reallynotice the depression too much.
(19:35):
But the alcohol would also feellike her manic episodes which
now I understand where manicepisodes like one time. I was
like, super obvious. And she hada checkbook you know, everyone
wrote checks back then becauseit was like early 2000s. And she
picked me and my friend, my bestfriend and took us the hot topic
(19:59):
and buttoned up Not just me, butmy friend like Gotham, Marilyn
Manson looking boots, and likevinyl trench coats. And when we
got core sets and fish nets, shewrote bad checks there then we
went to torrid and she bought mea core set and a cute skirt and
like, all this stuff, wroteanother bad check there. And
(20:20):
then we just like went and thenlike, it took a dark turn on the
way home, I was just like, Oh,now she's going to a dark place.
Then I was like, embarrassed,but like me and my friend had
like, hundreds of dollars worthof new swag. So it was like fun.
I'm like, I always remember thatlike moments thinking that like,
oh, like when I was drunk. It'sreally fun until it's not.
Rebel (20:40):
Yeah, and now it's like, understanding my illness more.
It's like, holy shit. Of course.
She was. Cool. Yeah, like, Thatmakes so much sense. Yeah, um, I
also think like, oh my god,writing bad checks is the worst
idea because it literally hasyour full name and address on
it. When I got a job there yearslater, I was all worried. I was
like, Oh, my mommy's like, Oh,yeah. When they were like,
(21:05):
training me about like checksand how to run checks. Like,
yeah, you see a lot of badchecks, and I'll let you run the
check through this. Sounds likedon't say anything? Yeah, like,
it's a secret. Was one of them.
You're like, at the likeChristmas party for your work.
And
Unknown (21:23):
you're like, Oh, wow. I mean, tell you a secret about
me. Stupid. It's like two truthsand a lie. Oh, my God. Okay,
anyways, um,
Rebel (21:40):
how do you deal with seasonal depression? How do I
deal with seasonal depression?
How do the people how should thedoctor rebel, Dr. Rebel, um, I
think that you should try andget your thoughts out of your
head somehow. So like, whetherthat is whatever method that you
prefer, I think that that's howyou should try and get your
(22:02):
thoughts out of your head. Youknow, like, my therapist has me
record videos talking, like tothe camera, because I'm a verbal
processor. And so when I feelsuper depressed, and super just
like, overwhelmed, or anything,she like, she like tells me to
just like, go and record it andthen deleted afterwards, but
(22:25):
like, it helps me get it out ofmy head. And that makes me feel
a little bit better. But I thinkthat that method doesn't work
for everyone. Some people likewriting work, some people doing
like art works. Some people likecalling someone and bitching
like that, that works. And Ithink some people like whatever
coping mechanism you have. Andif you don't have a coping
(22:49):
mechanism, find one becauseliterally, if you don't have a
coping mechanism,
Shove (22:57):
it will be mechanisms. I had a bad connotation until I
started therapy. And I was like,What do you mean? That's okay.
Like things that you think arelike really bad coping
mechanisms like unhealthy? Youplan on is better, because what
would happen without thosecoping mechanisms is far worse.
Like,
Rebel (23:13):
yeah, my therapist, actually, this is probably gonna
really, I don't know why I feellike I'm about to cry right now.
I'm fine. I promise. I'mdepression. Yeah, I don't know.
But like, my therapistsliterally told me, because I
always thought the fact that Iwould like drive, and then blast
my music super, super loud. Andthen like, scream, yell, all the
(23:34):
words. Like I always thoughtthat that was kind of unhealthy,
maybe like that. I shouldn't bedoing that. And she was like,
No, that's super healthy. Andthat's great. You should do
that. And why haven't you donethat in a while. And I was like,
because I'm stuck at homebecause I isolate myself when
I'm fucking depressed. Andthat's what I've been doing
recently is just like stayinghome. And like, just not going
(23:57):
anywhere. And, and then she toldme like, there are times when
like, I'm going to know that I'mgoing to be depressed, kind of
like seasonal depression. Thisis actually like, the reason
why, why I wanted to talk aboutthis today because my therapist
like handed it in to me thisweek, but therapy giving us
topics for escape date, thanks.
But like, she was saying thatthere are going to be times when
(24:21):
I know that things are going tobe bad. And when I know that
things are going to be bad, Ishould preemptively start
coping. So like, instead of justgoing and like driving and like
screaming loud to music, whenI'm in that moment that that's
more like, Oh, I forgot what shecalls it, but lo she call it
crisis mode. Like just insteadof just dealing when you're in
(24:45):
crisis mode, to like startcoping with how you know you're
going to feel ahead of time. Andthat kind of blew my mind
because I didn't really everthink of that like why would I
cope like beforehand, but She'slike, if you know that things
are gonna get bad during acertain month like, like, for
example, when when like shoveseasonal depression gets bad in
(25:06):
February, like, it's really hardfor me to. And so she was like
in February or before Februarylike you should know, February's
coming and you should starttaking care of yourself first.
So like you should start like,you know screaming and listening
to music before you feel, youknow, sad or you know, you're
empathizing or whatever. And Iwas like, Oh, that makes sense.
(25:29):
And she's like, before, if youever realize like that, there's
gonna be a time if you notice apattern, or maybe your partner
or your best friend or yourparents, like, they notice
patterns in you. And they, youknow, say to you, you know,
like, oh, during June, you tendto like struggle or whatever.
Like, maybe there's a way oflike, taking care of yourself,
kind of like putting somepadding around you before you
(25:51):
enter that season. Nice. I don'tknow, what do you think?
Unknown (25:57):
Go to your hardware store and get the sunlight
bulbs, because it's almost likedaylight.
Rebel (26:04):
That's what we did stretch our LED lights and
stretch out that light. So it'snot all dark and gloomy. If you
feel like he gets really bad,please seek help. Yeah, call for
help call for a friend to comeover. Just don't be alone. Yeah,
reach out for help. Yeah, Ithink like, admitting to
(26:25):
yourself, and then allowing,like, I think admitting yourself
that you're going through whatyou're going through as
important, because I think for along time, like I compared
myself to other people in mylife, or that I had grown up
with, and like theirexperiences. And so for me, all
(26:48):
of these different, like mentalillnesses still feel like I'm
gonna cry. All of thesedifferent mental illnesses, like
have a person attached to them.
For me, so like, you know,different mental illnesses are
connected to like my grandma, orlike my mom, or like my brother.
And for me, like, I never feltlike I had any of those things
(27:11):
because I was different thanlike, my mom, or my brother or
my grandma. And so, like,accepting the fact that I also
struggle with those things, butthat it's different. And that
that's okay. And that, like myexperience can be similar and
(27:31):
different to theirs. I think wasreally important for me. When
she's crying, I know I don'tknow why I'm crying. I like I've
had such an emotional week. Andthen like, you like the audio
sucks on this YouTube thisfuckin this podcast right now.
Because my recording has stoppedworking like 10 times. Yeah,
(27:55):
because I think that my laptopis dying. Which is so annoying.
Like, just so annoying. Of allthe things to happen like I just
would like my everything to justwork. Yeah, I don't have to
replace more things. Yeah,that's overwhelming. Anyways,
(28:16):
let me get the fuck out of thereal world. Yeah, let's leave
this place. I hate it here No,we'll weld the wheel world where
(28:38):
we're talking about skating inxiety. Skating anxiety. We
talked about it before maybe wejust touch base on it. No, we
like talked about general likenot wanting to skate around
episode of anxiety. Yeah.
anxiety, anxiety? No. Like, inseason two episode, I think like
(29:06):
37 or something like that. Okay,so yes. I know we're going to
change the approach that we taketo skate date next year. But of
all the roller skates, gamingpodcasts that are active, we're
the longest lasting and the mostconsistent even though we
haven't been very consistentrecently, which makes us the
(29:27):
fools. Okay, so do you ever haveskinny in xiety all the time. Oh
my god, I have so much gettinganxiety because you broke your
leg and smashed your teeth in orlike even before that, even
before that I have always I havealways had skating anxiety. When
I was playing derby. I used tolike feel sick before I went to
(29:49):
even just regular practice,especially when scrimmaging was
involved. Every time I go to theskate park, I have major skating
anxiety every time I Go to therink. I have skating anxiety
every time I skate with anyonewho's even kind of better than
me at skating, who isn't like inmy very close circle, I have
(30:09):
anxiety. Like really good athiding that. Oh, thank you. But
yeah, I do feel intense anxietyabout skating. Specifically,
because I know this is somethingthat we've talked about like,
like, we should not do or feelthis, but like, I still feel
(30:29):
like I should be better than Iam at skating at this point. And
I know that that is stupid. Andthat is, like, there's no
substance behind that. And thenthere's no logic behind it. And
I have to keep telling myselfthat, because I know it's not
real. But it still is the like,little like, devil that creeps
(30:51):
into my head to say thosethings. You know, the devil.
Yeah, the literal devil creepsinto my head and says, You suck.
I don't have the hole. Like forme, it's not like that, like, I
should be better where I am.
Because like, I know, I'm justlike,
Shove (31:09):
I would have to practice more like I am where I am.
Because that's where I am. Like,I don't put in the work. Because
like, for me, it's just like,ski to ski. Like, I don't want
to be the best or like, there'sall things I want to learn here
and there. But for me, like, Ijust like to ski to ski and for
the community. So like, I don'tfeel like I need to be the
master at something. So I'mpeople like past me. I'm like,
(31:31):
that's cool. Whatever. For me,it's more like, if I'm having an
off day, especially if I getanxious and like, my body's we
trained me and I'm like, I can'tI literally can't skate right
now I have noodle legs. I'moverwhelmed. And then like, the
fear of having like someone thatlooks up to me on the internet,
or something like seeing mewhile I'm skating like that, or
(31:52):
I mean, like breakdown. That'swhat makes me nervous. It's just
like, Oh, great. Now people aregonna think I can't even skate
on that, like, everything's alie that scares me. And like,
that gives me more anxiety thanthe idea of like, not being as
good as other people that aresomewhere.
Rebel (32:09):
I don't think that it's the idea of not being as good as
people. For me. I think Imiscommunicated that, what I
feel is a pressure to perform.
So yeah, that's what kind ofwhat I'm talking about. Yeah,
like, I feel like a pressure Ithink, especially because like
on my Youtube, like, I teachpeople how to skate. And I think
(32:31):
I feel like I should be betterthan I am at skating in general,
in order to be like teaching allthese people how to skate. And
so I struggle with beingsomewhere and feeling like I
should be, you know, to acertain standard, and then like,
(32:51):
not hitting that standard. Andthat causes me to not want to go
out and skate very often. Yeah.
And that sucks, because I don'tthink that that should exist.
Like, I think that that shouldbe a non a non issue, you know,
Mm hmm. And I don't even know,per se that anyone expects me to
(33:15):
like perform at a certainstandard when I go to the skate
park, or when I go to the rinkor anything, but, and I'm not
nervous about like falling ormessing up or any of that. I
think it's just that like,sometimes I literally just don't
know what to do. And I'mskating. And that gives me
anxiety. I wish that I hadexactly what I was supposed to
(33:37):
do. But then that kind ofdestroys the point of like
flowing and skating, I have tolike warm up and get comfortable
at first. So like when I'm liketoday, the photo shoot, like I
have that warm up period. And Iwas on the ramp with like any
safety gear. So I get likereally hesitant. So when the
photographer was here, like Ididn't really do anything, and I
(33:59):
fell out of it. Because I wasn'tlike in that confident like, Oh,
I'm just like vibing I'm justskating right now. And then like
rebel took some pictures of mewith her phone later. And I was
like, wow, like, I'm doing somuch better. And this is like,
what I wanted to convey in thislike photo shoot. And then now I
just felt like crap, because I'mlike, I should have given that
energy to my friend slashphotographer. And I did it. So I
(34:21):
feel like oh, I wasted her time.
And then that made me feel badbecause it's like, it's like a
photo shoot for a skate thing.
And then I feel like people aregonna see these pictures and be
like, she's just a model inskates. When like, I definitely
know how to be in movement. Andthen so like, that just made me
stand out like, oh, no, like thesame thing like the, like
(34:42):
anxiety because like you feellike you need to perform.
Shove (34:46):
Yeah, Mm hmm. But yeah, relate to that. And just like,
sometimes I wonder if like, theanxiety gets worse when I'm
skating or like anyone really isbecause you're exercising So
your bloods already pumpingfaster. So if you already have
slight anxiety, like, I wonderif that's just heightening it
(35:07):
more. So like, you know, like,sometimes I think about that,
like, you're already, likemoving really fast and like, is
that hoping? Or is that makingyou more anxious? Because, like,
fight or flight alreadyactivated? Yeah, for sure. But
yeah, so it's like reallyimportant for me like, I think
I've talked about it beforelike, like get to my destination
(35:27):
sometimes it just like, do somebreathing or like chill out for
a second and then go in. Becausesometimes like if I go like
socially when I used to skate bymyself at our old place, like
walk into portfolio or notportfolios into the library, the
coffee shop, not the book place.
I would skate there and one timelike, I would try to skate right
in and then instantly almostfall, and then not be able to
(35:49):
like order when I wantedproperly. What happens to me
when I get anxious, it's like,super embarrassing, and like,
sometimes it seems like a normalconversation, but I forget
words, or I replace words withdifferent words. And then
sometimes people laugh becausethey don't really know what's
going on. And then I feelstupid, and they don't want to
talk anymore. So I closed downbecause it's definitely like one
(36:12):
of those things. And I'm justlike, Oh, crap, like you
literally can't talk right now.
And it's definitely feels likethat thing that's getting kind
of worse lately, too. But so nowlike, or then I started skating
and then there was a littleOllie and I would stop there and
like just kind of chill for asecond like listen to a whole
song and then go in. It'd belike a way better experience and
(36:34):
going from skating straightthere. Stopping and it'd be like
Rebel (36:40):
everyone's staring at me, I feel on edge, blah, blah, then
going in and trying to act likea normal human just like order a
stupid fruit tart and a coffee.
Like giving myself a chance tolike catch my breath fully
relax, let adrenaline's on goingfrom like street skating, and
then go in like cutting restart,that would help. Yeah, I feel
like for me, I It's verydependent on the people that I'm
(37:02):
around. Like, it's verydependent on the people I'm
around. Like, if there's evenone person that I'm not
comfortable with it, like, allthe comfort goes out the door.
And so I feel like when I'maround, like, for example, when
I'm around Estro. Like I feeltotally fine, even though like
(37:22):
they're obviously significantlybetter at skating than me, but I
don't feel intimidated. I don'tfeel weird. I don't feel
anything like that when I'maround them. Because, like,
they're so close. And so likethat comfort level is there. But
like anyone else that was to belike better than me or like,
(37:43):
that I don't have a report withI just feel like I kind of like
just act kind of weird. Like Idon't like I almost stopped
wanting to skate which like, Ihate that. I don't want to not
want to skate like I want tojust want to skate. And even if
I want to skate, it's like I getthere. And then I like oh, man,
(38:05):
no, I don't want to skate. Andit's like, that sucks. It does.
I wonder if more people feelthat way? Probably right? Or
it's just like, there's like ashit ton of people that are good
skating. And I'm just like,great. I'm still in the way now.
And like, sometimes I'll belike, Wait, actually, they're
very supportive. So I'm gonna domy whatever. And they'll cheer
me on. And I'm like, cool, butlike, he gets like, Oh, now
(38:25):
there's six people. Very good.
I'll be like, I'll go ski on theother side of the park. Because
I'm just like, I'm just waste. Ifeel like I'm just wasting
people's time going in and doingwhatever little shady line or
run I want to do. But it was afleet. I was cooling somewhere.
(38:48):
And now I'm was and will it comeback? I can. Go ahead. Yeah. So
I feel like for me, anotherthing that gives me anxiety is
like, whenever people will,like, try and get me to do
something. Like if someone'strying to teach me something. I
(39:09):
really like that. But I also itreally gives me anxiety because
I feel like if I don'taccomplish it, then I have
failed them. And I've wastedtheir time.
Shove (39:20):
A lot of times I actually skate better when like I'm
around people I don't knowbecause that feeling of like I
have something to prove. So. Solike at rollouts, like even
though usually like even likeit's a physical thing to like,
let's say I normally a littleget tired and like wanna break
or like my back hurts. All of asudden when I'm leading a
(39:40):
rollout it's like what backpain? What blah, blah just like
writing pure adrenaline and Ijust like can do the whole
fucking thing and I'm just like,Yeah, I did it. And usually in
the front by myself because it'sjust being surrounded by other
people in the back. But um, I'mgoing to Miami as I mentioned
earlier to me This summer, andI'm nervous because like, I
(40:03):
always get weird about skating,like, straighten her been on
like, I don't know if I cantrust like, I have to trust the
neighborhood. I gotta trust theground. I got to know. Can I
skate in the street? Because Idon't like sidewalks. How are
the drivers out here? Am I gonnalike just get like fucked with
or they're gonna treat me like abicycle and I'll be safe like,
why are there a lot of potholes?
Like if I take this? Is there ahill right around the corner? Is
(40:26):
this Phil even safe to bomb? Ordoes it have random fucking
holes in it? These are things Ineed a noticeable safe so I tend
to like really BB skate in newplaces because I don't know if I
can trust it. And especially ifsome nightscape and I'm going to
Miami I'm like on night one likeit's a night skate. And like
knowing that, like I was able tolook up and be like, Okay,
(40:50):
that's a part look smooth, but Ithink it's gonna go into the
street. And I don't knowanything about that. And like,
I'm one of those people asked meoverprepared, so I like looked
up the skate park, we're goingto, I looked up the park, we're
starting the rollout. Like Iwant all this information, so I
can feel more secure, becauseI'm not big on just going to a
new place without anyinformation. And now it's like,
(41:11):
I also need to skate and just belike, this is fine. And like, it
makes me feel weird. Yeah,that's totally nerve wracking.
Yeah, but I'm just hoping thefact that like, he'll be like,
well, there's people I don'tknow, here. Like, I'll just push
through it. Just do it. Like,I'm going with people I do know.
(41:32):
And like, I've traveled with oneof them before and it went well.
So we'll see. We'll see. Itshould be interesting.
Rebel (41:42):
I think you're gonna do great. I think you'll have fun
and you're gonna do great. Andyeah, you'll feel bad anxiety.
But like, is there somethingthat you can do to help yourself
in the moment with your anxiety?
Drink? Not recommend. No,definitely drinking water
though. Because like when I getanxious, and I'm dehydrated, and
(42:02):
skating, I do throw up.
Shove (42:08):
You seen it? Yeah. Many overwhelmed. You water? Um, so
yeah, I meant drink water, notalcohol. No, but for me, like,
I'm not gonna lie. Like, I know.
It's gonna be like a toughthing. I want to take like a
shot real quick and just belike, who for the nerds like not
like get drunk drunk? So if youdon't have a drinking problem I
(42:28):
recommend maybe not, but not allthe time. That shows bad advice,
I guess. But do you boo boo.
And, um, no, but like,seriously, like, the breathing
really does help. I'll even dolike under my breath. Like I
used to, like, totally hide it.
But now I don't really care ifpeople really notice and I'm
like, breathing slowly, all of asudden, because that's what has
(42:49):
to bring me back to reality andtry to convince myself like, so
key. You're gonna be okay.
You're safe. So I'm really intolike deep breathing, for sure.
Rebel (43:02):
And you like sneak away sometimes. Right? Oh, yeah, just
appear. That's in here. Like hernumber one
Shove (43:09):
tactic. Yeah, the queer prom I just disappeared. So many
times. I was just like, Ihaven't this. Like it was just
like too much time. So I wouldjust go out to the front where
there was literally no one andjust sit there. But then people
started asking questions. Sothen I'd go in, or the
photographer was because no onewas there. And then I'd go to
the dance floor where there wasno one dancing because everyone
(43:30):
was skating. And then like, Ijust would find places like
pockets where there was zeropeople. I love it. Yeah. And
then it's like so nice. Silenceis even better.
Rebel (43:41):
Yeah. Awesome. Any other thoughts about skating anxiety?
So yeah, it's alright, let'smove on over to Two girls, one
pup.
(44:07):
Two girls, one pup, the segmentthat wasn't mentioned by chef in
the beginning. And the rebelsaid, this is boring. We're
running out of things. Boy, he'snot doing anything. I was right.
I had to pandemic yada, yada,yada. And I was like football.
We love him in the memes. Sogood. And she's like, he just
wanted to work, but it can't.
And I was like, fine. So then Iwas like, well ask your skate
date. And then that was great.
And then people hated us andstopped writing. And so now it's
(44:29):
back to two girls one pup, atleast for this episode. So
what's going on with Bowie thisweek, baby? Well, he's melted on
the table with his back legdangling into my lap. Very cute
because he's really needy rightnow because he had surgery last
all drugged up. Yeah, yeah, hehad surgery because he had a
(44:49):
little maths on his eye, andthey had to remove it. And then
he also had to get teeth removedand he got eight teeth removed.
Or guy So yeah, so he's onantibiotics and painkillers and
Benadryl. And yes, we're Kareem.
And he has to wear a cone. Yeah.
(45:10):
So we have a little, a softerCone of Shame for him. Now, it
was really funny when he, whenhe came home, he would just
stand somewhere random and juststare off into space. Like he
was still so high. We were like,Oh, my gosh, was going on. He
was top shivering. It was sortof sad. Sad. So we're like
trying to help him. But youknow, he can't talk. So we're
(45:33):
just trying to do our best toread his body language. And now
we'll take the code off. Andhe's like, laying with us. And I
think like, we have constantvision on him. But he has to
keep the phone on pretty muchfor two weeks, because we don't
want him scraping his stitchesout on his eye. For a little
girl or a little guy eating wetfood because his teeth offices.
(45:54):
Yeah, his birthday was lastweek. So it's 10 He turned 10.
And then he got this bigsurgery. Happy birthday. The
knife and he was like, fine,it's gonna cost you more than
$3,000 He was like, I I want afacelift. Man, so pay for this.
(46:16):
So he was excited. He was like,oh my god, I'm gonna look like a
five year old pup again. Andthen he went to the vet thinking
this is it. I'm getting mybeauty surgery. And then he's
like, cool, like prior to doingeyelift within the he got out.
He's like, What the fuck? Yeah,he was like, you're supposed to
give me straight teeth and notpull my teeth. Yeah, so he's a
(46:39):
little mad at us for that. Buthe's doing well. His he's
starting to finally like try toscratch about i, which is a good
sign because that means it'shealing. Yeah, the doctor didn't
say that. But I know that justfrom all the times I've fallen
false Kadeem. And every timethings heal, they itch. Yeah,
it's that skin growing back.
Yeah. But yeah, so he is doingwell. The doctor said that he
(47:03):
did really well under theanesthesia. And that overall, he
just did really good. So that'sexcellent. And a good little
teeter totter. He is a reallygood potato. So we're proud of
him. But yeah, it was a lot ofmoney. And it was like my enemy.
Let's go out. So if you wouldlike to help with Bowies 1000s
of dollars. And he has to goback again. There's our Venmo
(47:30):
attached. Yeah. Girl skates, andjust right Bowie in there. Yeah,
just right Bowie. So we know.
Even if it's $1 switch. Now youknow why I'm so frustrated about
my computer because we like100,000% can not afford me to
have to get a new laptop. Andit's Christmas. Yeah, we took
(47:55):
our Christmas movie took ourChristmas, but that's we love
you. We want to make sure hedidn't have puppy cancer. And we
wanted to make sure that hewasn't in pain with his teeth,
but also that his bad breathmight have been because of the
bad teeth. Yeah, definitelywatch him still have bad breath.
Probably because he's a dog. No,but like, there's dog breath and
(48:16):
there's a nice belly breath issomething shit in your mouth.
Did it die and then did it shit.
Like, that's literally what itfucking smells like. It's so
yeah, but we love them anyway,we love him very much.
Unknown (48:29):
I would rather smell his butthole than his breath.
I'd rather have his button myface in his face. I'm not even
looking like he's slept No.
Rebel (48:43):
By my face before it smelled nothing. He is and I'm
like, okay, though, but one timeboy. He pooped on my leg, like,
and then another time, he waslike, my mom and I go to pick
him up. And I put my hand on hisbutt and it was just covered. It
was shit. It was so disgusting.
And I was like, oh my god, thisis so gross. But I was like, Oh,
(49:06):
poor guy. And it was also likeso gross. Like weeks apart from
each other. Literally this bothof those things happened like
last month. Yeah. So know whatthat's low. But that's love I
guess so that is literally likebeing a mother to baby human.
But he's very cute. And so now Ising songs to him and we whisper
(49:26):
in his ears even though he can'thear us and we give him your
scratches and lots of cuddleseven more than usual, way more
than usual, which was already alot so like he's never on the
table during a podcast. So youknow, he's been like, I've just
been holding him like he's beenon my shoulder a lot recently.
So he loves us. He loves milkingit for sure. He's for sure
(49:50):
milking it. Like he won't takehis meds with his regular food.
It's like has to be like cheeseor like some other random like
shit yeah, anyways, yeah, sothat's two girls one pup and if
you want to write in for findyour skate date, you can email
us at dear skate date@gmail.com.
(50:12):
Or you can DM us on skate datepod on Instagram. And you would
just send us a picture a shortbio, your handle and your
pronouns and then you we willtalk about you on the podcast
help you find a skate in yourarea. Alright, you want to move
on to deer shovel? Let's do it,okay.
(50:47):
Remember, in Deer shovel, wetalk about questions y'all ask
and then we answer them. So ifyou want to write in a question,
you can either again DM us on atthe skate date pod, or you can
email us at dear skatedate@gmail.com Your questions
starting with your shovel and itcould be about anything at all,
(51:10):
and we will answer it. So. Sotoday's question is, dear
shovel, what are your favoriteholiday traditions? And what are
you most excited about doingthis year? Sincerely a lover of
statements,
Shove (51:28):
my favorite holiday or the past and that'd be
Halloween. So that's my holidayseason. And it was humming a
Halloween party. And it wasgoing out on Halloween. And it
was watching scary movies allmonth. November, whatever
Thanksgiving and Christmas timewith rebel. It's like more fun,
(51:50):
but my only tradition would bewatching like Christmas and
drinking eggnog and watchingRebel open her presents.
Anything else
Rebel (51:58):
I don't care about?
handed over to rebel. And whatare you most excited about doing
this here? Nothing. Nothing.
Different file. I mean, yeah,it's just it's the same thing
(52:19):
every year. And it's like, cool.
Like, I like watching you happyfor my new presence. And it's
not like I'm most excited for.
And then like, I really enjoywatching like Christmas, but I
don't live for it. LikeChristmas is cool. Like I think
and literally even justChristmas like, month like
December. I think I'm just asucker for lights to be honest.
(52:39):
And maybe it's because I did toomuch ecstasy in my early 20s In
my rave days, and I'm like, ooh,shiny lights. But like I just
like that there's lightseverywhere. And it's cute. And I
really like to smell cinnamon.
And I'm happy for y'all to comeand but that's it. See, that was
a good answer. But let's likeI'm not like, Oh my god. Yay.
It's finally Christmas time. Idon't think you have to be like
(53:00):
that in order to have somethingto look forward to. But like
there's a lot of people outthere you that like are so happy
that when it's like finallyholidays. It's like oh my God
finally. Yes. Like you love thedecorating. You love everything.
Yeah, that's true. I'm excitedabout everything. I am excited
(53:22):
to decorate the house and have atree up. I'm excited about
making sugar cookies anddecorating them I'm excited.
Last year was a failure in Vegasfail what even happened? We like
tried to make dinner. And thenthey were like wave to fly. And
(53:44):
we tried to use like a knife.
Yeah. Yeah, it was a disaster. Iremember that now. Good times.
Um, I am looking forward to Iwant to go Christmas caroling on
my skates. I like skatingdowntown Naples and looking at
lights. I like hot drinks. LikeI like drinking hot drinks in
(54:09):
the cold and like doingChristmas activities or like
holiday activities. Like, I wantto go ice skating. And I don't
like making gingerbread houses.
I used to think I liked it. Andthat concept is fun. We did it.
I would feel the same way aboutokay, I feel the same way about
gingerbread house decorating asI do about carving pumpkins. And
(54:29):
that is no, it's a lot of work.
It's a lot of work and it is awaste of time. It is 100% a
waste of time. So I feel thoseare the two I'm sorry if you're
all fans of those twoactivities, but I think those
two activities are the biggestpiles of trash that we've been
(54:51):
told that we're supposed toenjoy but like nobody likes
doing it and then pumpkinsliterally last for like two
days. And then fuck gingerbreadhouses once you make them, they
don't taste good. Becausethey're, they're stale because
they've been sitting out. It'salways, you know, I mean, like
it's a waste of candy. Yeah, thecandy that comes with is never
(55:13):
even good. They know you're notgonna get it and like, and like
the frosting does not work likeyou literally, in order to make
your gingerbread house stand up.
Without wanting to killyourself. You have to use hot
glue, like just period like youjust have to you have to ruin
the fact you have to ruin yourgingerbread house for eating in
order to not want to punch yourginger Remy we also got a really
(55:36):
cheap one so I'm sure there'slike a frosty that does work.
Like we probably just like suckat it. It does not matter the
$10 one from Trader Joe's shouldwork like people aren't glue
getting their gingerbreadhouses. Yeah, well, people also
probably have more time in theirlives. You're just like, sit
(55:56):
there and like what blow onfrosting to make it hard. And
how do you even make it harden?
I don't know. There's noinstruction. That's like, Hold
you just said but like you haveto hold it together for so long.
Like I was successful. We wereboth successful eventually in
like putting our gingerbreadhouse together but like it's not
(56:16):
worth it. And there's neverenough there's never enough of
any like one ingredient to makea consistent pattern. Like
across the house. Oh, are stillgoing no, it's really fucked up.
Wow, so that's my least favoritewhich like the sign rebel
rousers petition to cancel sogingerbread house but don't
(56:39):
cancel like you know, like whenyou go to a you know, those like
Christmas pop up things whereyou like can go into a room and
then it's a life sizedgingerbread house. Don't cancel
those because those areexcellent. I love those existing
decorated already gingerbreadhouses. Oh
cute, that are life size. Okay.
Build your own gingerbreadhouse. No, cancel. I hate that
(56:59):
activity. Also think that itwould be fun this year. This is
what I'm looking. I'm lookingforward to doing Christmas
crafts. So I'm looking forwardto it. So I like to make large
life size lollipops and put themin our yard this year. That is
my goal. Do you think she'll doit? Probably not. I might. I
(57:21):
might do it. Usually, okay.
Every year, I usually make giftsfor everyone. Last year usually
it's either a fail or way toomuch. Last year, I made bath
(57:50):
salts and like, like differentlike, smells and like put them
together and put them in cutelittle tubes and like all this
sort of stuff. I still have thatshit left over. Like I still
have so much freaking bats out.
So if you want to come on over Ishould probably give you I mean
No, like I'm gonna give yousome. There'll be like weird
conversations like someone willbe like, yeah, and then yada
(58:10):
yada yada. And then rebel goes,do a bathtub. Like this is real
shit. Like, they'll be like, allconfused, like, yes, like, Oh,
cool. Here's some bath salts orit's like, no, no, like, and
then just like, oh. And thenthey'll just keep telling their
story like what the hell? I wishthat was an exaggeration, but
(58:34):
that literal conversationshappen at least three times that
I can recall immediately off thetop of my head. I even tried to
pawn some off on someone atThanksgiving brunch this last
joke. Yeah, but it's fine. Yeah,so anyway, so last year I made
bath salts the year before thatI made candles was that the
candle year candles didn't burnthe candles and I made like I
(58:57):
had poured them and everythingand they made the coasters
remember you made jewelryholders marbled and then like
you painted the rim. It was verycute. Because you should have
used Modge Podge that was yeah,I made like little little bowls
(59:19):
made out of like marbled claycuz I like took different clay
and then I like marble thattogether and then I you know
like cooked it and it wasamazing. Yeah, so those are I
don't know whether they're gone.
And then the candles that I madethat year they didn't
Unknown (59:38):
stay lit. So I just gave all these candles everyone.
Nobody said anything. Whichmeans that everyone was very,
very nice.
Rebel (59:47):
Where they just never tried to light their candle
which I doubt so
Unknown (59:52):
Christmas the time of failure. Yeah. Okay, they grow
shitty crafts.
Rebel (59:57):
I don't think that there was anything else you really
Whatever. Anything else beforemy time? Yeah, so good times. Oh
my gosh, yeah. So that's what Ido I fail during the holiday
season. And I'm fine with it.
It's fine with me. I don't havean idea of what to make this
year, so I'm just gonna not.
(01:00:19):
Okay, got it. Yeah. All right.
Well, that was cool. Thank you.
Thanks for going on that rollercoaster ride. That was this
podcast. gingerbread houses,fuck gingerbread houses also
can't believe I cried. And alsosome of this audio is going to
be excellent. And some of it'sgoing to be terrible. So
Unknown (01:00:41):
and also what? Maybe Be on the lookout on a certain
major sports brand YouTubechannel for December 14.
Rebel (01:00:59):
Oh, is you might see me on it. With a famous golf
players nice and a famoussinger. Wow.
Unknown (01:01:10):
That's that's all the hint. Oh, that's exciting. I
love that. Yeah. If you'rewatching on YouTube, and you
think you know where that'll bewhat it is. Here's a head. They
only have black women on it.
Rebel (01:01:26):
When it's on a major sports brand channel. That's.
Yeah, that's a good hint. I lovethat. But yeah, so after that,
just watch for chefs page,because you'll see exciting
stuff dropping there. And yeah,so we hope that you love this
episode of this podcast. This isus at our realest that's why we
(01:01:50):
started making this podcast sowe could be real A F with you
and talk about things thataren't just how to roller skate.
Yeah, and we have about threeweeks until we go on our holiday
hiatus. Yes. And then we'regonna come back with a refreshed
understanding of how we're goingto approach the podcast. Hell
(01:02:11):
yeah. No more burnout. Hellyeah, no burnout. So ways to
support our podcast one youcould give us five stars and and
comment on Apple podcasts. Thatwould be amazing. We'll shout
you out. The next way is thatyou could subscribe to her
YouTube like comment andsubscribe. That third way is to
(01:02:35):
shop at cheers the query calm orfat femme fatale shop, which is
my shop and shop shop. And bydoing that you're supporting us,
which also supports this podcast
Unknown (01:02:47):
and share our podcast with your friends. They'll hate
you for it.
Rebel (01:02:52):
Because they'll either be addicted or they'll be like What
is this nonsense? Thank you somuch for listening and or
watching. We love you so much.
Have a wonderful week and wewill see you next Wednesday
slash Thursday. Yes, yeah.
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