Smeared Mascara
"Laugh with us, cry with us, smear your mascara with us." This podcast is hosted by longtime friends, Mandy and Brooke who have been born and bred in the San Francisco Bay Area. These ladies love themselves some pop culture and drama which probably stems from their latchkey kid beginnings. Their main news source is social media but their strong opinions always find their way into the conversation. The topics are fueled by unmedicated ADHD and the language is always spicy. So sit back and listen to your new favorite pop culture podcast, Smeared Mascara!
Episodes
The ladies of Smeared Mascara have once again created a pod-tastic masterpiece for your listening pleasure. Brooke recaps the Little League World Series, shitty Bay Area traffic, and haircut class woes. You may find yourself questioning thinning shears and their use. Mandy gushes over a newfound podcast, and has survived another brutal season of parenting. The Hazel Cafe TikTok drama is brought up and console tables ...
Thank you for joining Brooke and Mandy in today’s very important discussion about retirement. The ladies of Smeared Mascara will guide you in making some of the most important choices that you will make in your adult life.
Serious topics such as ideal home decor and poolside socialization opportunities are in today’s episode. Learn how to live your best retirement life while remaining true to your authentic hoe-s...
The ladies try something new this week by broadcasting live on TikTok. You’ll hear Brooke and Mandy professionally explain their origins story and expertly manage this new element of recording.
No… so for realsies you’ll hear these babes figuring out how TikTok Live works and telling their new viewers all about Charli XCX’s wedding among other topics. Some highlights are Brooke sharing an unhinged traffic school ...
Step into the Smeared Mascara Time Machine and travel to the summers of the past. This week Brooke and Mandy talk about childhood, teen, and early adult summertime. Hear how these divas survived without air conditioning and smartphones.
Language is spicy as always. If you’re surprised you must be new here. Welcome!
It’s time to pause the VCR and take a pod break because Smeared Mascara starts NOW.
This week Brooke and Mandy describe their Too Short concert experience. The vibe was chill and the ladies were loving it. (Check out the Smeared Mascara socials for dancing, rapping, and more from the show!)
The Bezos wedding is judged harshly from wardrobe choices to the guest list. Like Countess Luann sang, “Money can’t buy you class.” Luckily the people of Venice used their creativity to express their opinions ...
The world is in shambles and you probably need to tune out from reality. Luckily Brooke and Mandy are here to help.
The ladies of Smeared Mascara make fun of the political jerk-offs so you don’t have to. Relax while petty insults are thrown at RFK and his homies. KN is missing and there’s no trail of extensions to follow. This is a code Red, White & Blue.
Keep listening to hear Brooke’s encounter with complaining c...
Welcome back to another installment of Smeared Mascara. This week Brooke and Mandy talk about the nationwide No Kings protests, grad parties, and Father’s Day. Mandy shares her support for Miley Cyrus, and Brooke reveals her true feelings about the Dodgers. Is this now a sporty spice and political podcast? Nope, it’s still the same shit talking pop culture podcast fueled by undiagnosed ADHD.
Language is filthy as alwa...
This episode the ladies discuss life’s general fuckery. Topics range from protests to sphincters. Brooke introduces us to her new Dyson, and Mandy recounts her trip to SoCal. There is a brief Diddy trial update, and some major Mario Lopez hateration.
So buckle up and get ready for this raunchy ride of podcast amazingness.
As always, the language is foul. Plan accordingly.
Rated FY for Fuck Yeah
Get ready to smize and work the runway with Brooke and Mandy. This week the ladies talk about the beautiful and diverse bodies of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Fashion Show, eighth grade audacity, and all things pop culture. Real-time reactions to the college softball World Series can be heard in the background which ultimately set the pace for this episode.
Enjoy the return of Kiss or Miss, and hear the latest reco...
This episode was recorded on Memorial Day of 2025. Brooke and Mandy discuss how blessed they are to be alive during this time of equal rights and economic prosperity. <<record scratch>> Okay, jump in the DeLorean and get back to reality.
The ladies discuss everything from softball supers to the latest in tv and TikTok. Of course Hulu’s Secret Lives of Mormon Wives is a topic this week.
Be sure to notice th...
We solemnly swear to judge pop culture, politics, and any other topics we see fit. Join us in the Smeared Mascara courtroom, won’t you? The Honorable Judges Brooke and Mandy are serving unsolicited opinions and lewks.
Listen to the ladies recap their weekends. Brooke witnesses geriatric drama, and Mandy visits the suburban version of Chuck E. Cheese. Sporty Spice News returns, and Possessed Doll Corner premiers. Of cou...
Welcome back to Smeared Mascara, the religious and political podcast. (Insert record scratch) Just kidding! There’s mention of these taboo dinner party topics but in the way that gets you sent to hell.
This week the ladies recap their Mother’s Day activities and how hashtag blessed they are. Did YOU take your kid to an anime convention over an hour away like Mandy did??? Brooke tells us about a concert she attended an...
This week Brooke and Mandy use their finest screenshots gathered from the World Wide Web to discuss The Met Gala. Get dandy with us, won’t you?
It’s also an early birthday celebration for B-Rock. Hear how she plans on spending this milestone day. Conclave Couture could make an appearance.
Mandy is crushed over the conclusion of The Righteous Gemstones. Jesus take the wheel because this girl is not okay.
The ladies of Smeared Mascara are back and ready to talk some smack!
Warning: Strong opinions are shared about sandwiches, movies, concerts, and podcasts.
Clips of Katy Perry’s latest stage show are hitting socials and viewers confused. Does space travel decrease a human’s ability to perform? Our sources say maybe.
TikToks showcasing Cowboy Carter concert lewks are being posted and some are creative AF. Extensions on...
This week’s episode of Smeared Mascara focuses on the three Cs: Coachella, Conclave and Chisme.
Find out details from Mandy’s festival field correspondent, and what this reveals about Gen Z.
Brooke gives us a behind the scenes story about Beauty School Fight Club. It’s as intense as that blue mascara from the 80s.
Pop in those AirPods and tune out the world because Smeared Mascara is gonna teach you a few things.
Warni...
Put on your shorty shorts and your flower crown because we’re headed to Coachella! Actually Brooke and Mandy are reporting about Coachella via social media. Did you really expect these babes to travel during the school year? In this economy?
The ladies hypothesize the logistics of possible festival hookups, and navigating the desert landscape in a wheelchair.
Brooke tells us about her return to the softball f...
**This episode contains SPOILERS for the season 3 finale of White Lotus**
This week Brooke and Mandy talk about the nationwide protest that took place over the weekend. The signs were signing and the people are pissed.
Mandy spills the tea about a bachelorette party in wine country. Lessons were learned, and memories were made.
Both ladies give their opinions about the last episode of The White Lotus. What should have ha...
This episode is popping with pop culture. Brooke and Mandy have a mature discussion about appendages and Italian desserts. The ladies also talk about the challenges of raising Gen Z-ers, “remixing” your life, and their current favorite streaming shows.
This is definitely not the episode to listen with your kids or conservative friends. It’s giving the sex, drugs and HBO MAX vibe.
So stop doom scroll...
Have you ever accidentally texted the wrong person? We absolutely have. Have you ever accidentally added a journalist to a super, ultra, mega confidential political message??? And then the journalist publishes the message? And THEN the White House press secretary gets involved???? Well Brooke and Mandy have never done that, but that would be totes embarrassing.
Listen to the ladies discuss the latest in world news, pop...
St. Patrick’s Day is a big deal in any city named Dublin. Mandy and Brooke experienced this holiday in their hometown like never before. What started out as a normal Saturday morning turned into an afternoon of lip syncing for their lives. Lucky for all involved, there is video footage.
Put on anything green and set your leprechaun traps because you are now entering The Smeared Mascara Zone.
Rated C for C#nty
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