December 1, 2025 • 45 mins
The moment JR’s limo door swings open in Southern California, the neighborhood heat spikes. We set out to unwind with Knots Landing and instead tumble into a crossover storm: Val’s thinly veiled novel lights up the gossip circuit, Abby smiles her way through a high-stakes bargain, and Karen refuses to let a slick technicality bury a crime. It’s the kind of hour where a manuscript becomes a weapon, charm becomes currency, and a living-room reading turns into a countdown to chaos. We walk through Val’s creative crisis as “Capricorn Crude” goes from diary-turned-novel to publishing gold, drawing the wrong eyes at the worst time. Joe steps in as editor and ballast, but the ground shifts when new owners arrive—and then shifts again when JR quietly buys into the publishing house. That move reframes everything: will this story see daylight, or will power get the last edit? Meanwhile, Abby and JR meet for a surgical lunch. She wants certainty about Gary’s inheritance; he wants Gary as far from Dallas as possible. The negotiation is sharp, subtle, and slightly dangerous, and it sets Abby on a path that looks like love, strategy, or both. While those plates spin, Karen locks onto a case that slipped through court cracks. Mac tries to slow her charge without dimming her fire, and their back-and-forth builds into a smart portrait of how you fight people who don’t play by the rules. Then the episode jolts into heart-in-throat territory: Laura’s overdue labor hits during Val’s gathering, a detour turns into a wreck, and a backseat becomes a delivery room. Richard’s bookworm prep becomes hero work, and baby Daniel’s first cry resets the emotional arc. By the end, fortunes tilt, alliances harden, and one small newborn becomes the episode’s truest plot twist—life cutting through the noise. Stream now for the full breakdown, the sharpest lines, and our take on who’s really holding the pen. If you’re into vintage prime-time soaps, power plays, and messy love, follow, share, and leave a quick review to help more listeners find the show.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_01 (00:03):
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
welcome and welcome back toSnowflor.
We have personal gathering placefor you.
We acknowledge that the NOTdialogue and the golden name
contact.
And your host just contactstorylines of the 1990s.
Okay, we're back on the WestCoast when we add still need to
(00:23):
know that.
So whether you're going to thenstart for the list goes back in
the door, I don't think it's notfive outside.
No, I don't think that's onepoint of time.
I don't want to talk about 200.
(01:02):
I know the day is taken outwell.
I hope the hard one behind yougot the thing take care.
I hope you're chilling.
I hope you're at your best.
And I hope you're ready for afun fold edition of Soapor.
Or so I thought.
The word fun is quite literallythe most relative word in that
(01:26):
whole statement.
Because um I I'm not sure I madethe right choice today.
I I already told you lastepisode.
I'm just gonna be vibing, I'mgonna be chilling, I'm gonna be
watching all of my stories,right?
I'm gonna catch up, I'm gonnaget ahead, I'm gonna fully
immerse myself for the nextmonth or so in my stories.
So I said to myself, I said,Jet, out of all the stories, if
(01:48):
these people were real, if theywere your actual neighbors, who
would you be the most nosy with?
Who would you be the mostcurious about?
Knott's Landing, obviously,right?
It was between Knott's Landingto me and Dallas today.
I thought, okay, which one am Igonna do?
I decided on Knott's Landing.
10 minutes into the show, I'malready stressed the hell out.
(02:09):
This was supposed to be a fun,relaxing moment.
I'm not relaxing.
And I'm thinking to myself, isit because I've had a rough day?
No.
They're just stressing me outalready.
What the hell?
I'm gonna try my best to getthrough half of this show.
As a matter of fact, I'm gonnaremove this microphone here.
I'm gonna put it in a differentroom.
I'm gonna watch half of the showand then I'm gonna move on.
(02:32):
Go ahead and pour yourself upsomething bubbly and bright as
we jump into season four,episode two of Knott's Landing.
Daniel.
Who the hell is Daniel?
Got ourselves the firstcrossover episode of the season.
J.R., big JR Ewing is in SoCal.
(02:53):
He's in the back of a limo,cackling, reading, no doubt,
Valen's transcript, cackling.
He thinks it's the funniestthing he's ever seen in his
life.
He switched out the regular maledriver for a hottie blonde
driver.
She's like, What's so funny?
He's like, I'm just reading mylife story.
Kiki Kiki Kiki.
He's there to stir up trouble.
One of the first scenes we seebeside that, though, speaking of
(03:16):
trouble, is of Mac.
I've decided to call him andJoe.
Joe's like, Mac, what the heckwere you thinking?
Why did you give my sister thosethose transcripts from the
court?
Mac said, Well, I mean, it'spublic record.
It isn't like I could very wellkeep that from her.
Joe says, I know, but you don'treally know my sister.
Mind you, they're doing thiswhole thing in very heavy New
(03:37):
York accents.
They're they're uh they'rehomeboys, they're they're
comrades, want you to know thatthey're from the same part of
the country.
So it's it's you know, let me bereal with you, you be real with
me.
You giving my sister this islike lighting a match in a
gasoline factory.
She doesn't just want to knowhow the trial went, she's
looking for an out.
She feels like something ismissing, and that's what she's
(03:58):
combing over.
Do you know, good sir officerMac, that she hit up our
neighbor no less than eighttimes yesterday?
Mac says, Okay, and what's thatgot to do with me?
Well, our neighbor, as Joe tellshim, is a dude named Richard who
is a lawyer.
She's she's definitely going topursue this, my guy.
Why did you open this can ofworms?
He's like, Listen, I didn'treally want to, but what can I
(04:20):
tell the lady?
Like I said, this is publicrecord.
Mac lets down his guard and hetells Joe, this sort of to me
feels like somebody dropped theball.
Like the DA was pointing thefinger at so-and-so, so-and-so
is pointing the finger at DA.
Meanwhile, it feels likesomebody missed something.
Joe agrees.
He says, It looks like, based onwhat Karen has dug up, that this
(04:43):
guy got off on a technicality.
She's not gonna let this go.
I know I said it was 10 minutesin.
I'm only six minutes in.
Okay, I promise I'm putting itdown.
So, what does happen the first10 minutes of this episode?
I'll tell you what happened.
Uh, the proverbial fecal matterhits the van.
(05:03):
J.R.
Ewing is showing up in Knot'sLanding, not because he's
checking on his good old littlebaby brother and his wife.
It's not because he needs somemore sun.
There's plenty of sun in Dallas.
He's showing up because Abbylast episode sent him the full
transcript of Valen Ewing'sbook.
I'm starting to believe thisbook is never going to happen
(05:25):
because there's so much dramaalready.
Now, she, being Valen, is backat home pacing back and forth.
She's talking to Joe, who hasbecome her new editor.
She is freaking the F out.
This diary entry that turnedinto a 300-page essay has now
turned into a novel, has nowturned into one of the most
salacious topics in all of thewomen magazine.
(05:49):
There's some sort of spread andsome sort of lady magazine where
it's very clearly Pam and SueEllen and Miss Ellie.
It is very clearly them.
Like people are starting to pickup on who this book is really
about, which is great news forthe editor, great news for the
publisher.
But Valen is like, my God, Ithis listen, it's fiction.
Yes, the people I'm basing it onsomething, but I'm making up the
(06:13):
stories about it.
She clearly ain't making upstories good enough to
disassociate the people shewrote about.
It's just getting thicker andthicker.
One of the first things we seeis Laura and Richard coming back
from an appointment.
Guess they'd gone to thehospital because she was having
Braxton Hicks, and she didn'tknow what that was.
He was explaining that to her.
Now, part of me is like, okay,why would he need to explain
(06:36):
that to her?
He explains to her in theaudience, Richard, that is, that
Braxton Hicks contractions feela lot like real-term
contractions, only they're superfar apart, like yours were.
So I already knew you weren'treally in labor.
And she's apologizing to him.
I'm immediately disheartened bythis relationship already.
(06:56):
She works so hard to move on, tomove through, to co-parent, do
the things, only to now be backin his life, and she has shrunk
back into that role, baby.
She is back to being let mecoddle coddle you, Laura.
It is devastating.
That don't really matter becauseby the time that Richard and
Laura pull up to their home,they see JR's big old country
(07:17):
limousine.
Who is that?
Oh, that's Gary's brother.
What's his name?
Laura don't remember.
Richard doesn't remember.
But Richard walks over and hesays, Hey, you looking for Gary?
JR does the polite thing.
Hey, Mr.
Uh Avery, Richard Avery.
Gary doesn't live with Valenanymore.
He's living at uh Abby's house.
And JR is like, oh word?
(07:37):
What you mean you live in atAbby's house?
Right away, Richard's like, oh,I guess you brothers don't talk
that often.
JR is like, you know how it is.
You know how Abby.
But go on, go ahead and tell me.
So what do you mean?
He's living at Abby's house,huh?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's been living there a coupleweeks now.
Valen lives at her house withher mama.
They don't live together.
They are basically separated.
(07:58):
JR is like, Word?
Dang, that's crazy.
Appreciate you, Mr.
Avery.
And instead of waiting for Garyat Abby's house, JR sees an
opportunity to stir the pot.
And by the grace of God, he'sgot a really big spoon.
He walks over to Val's house,knock, knock, knock, opens the
door.
She's already freaking outbecause of the book, only to
(08:20):
open the door and to see JR.
And she's like, oh my god, ohno, oh no.
Now JR is playing country dumb.
Nobody, and I mean nobody butAbby knows that he knows that
there's a book.
So when he walks in, I don'tknow if it's guilt or whatever,
Val has no choice but to sort ofspill the beans a little bit.
JR is like, yeah, we I've heardall sorts of things around
Dallas, but I told Mama and SueEllen and them, don't worry
(08:43):
about it.
Who would want to read aboutLittle Old Us?
What's the name of the bookcalled?
Porn Crude?
Porn Nasty?
Crudy Crude Dude.
She's like, it's calledCapricorn Crude.
By this time, Joe jumps in.
Everything's super casual, butJoe is none the wiser about who
JR really is.
You see, Joe being new, onlyknows a little bit about Gary.
(09:06):
He's not really judging hisentire family about it.
He didn't know what thisinformation he's about to spill
is going to do to Valen andGary's future.
I'm certainly sure of him.
So he starts explaining to JRthat yes, publishing is going
through a little bit of adrought.
However, this story is going tobe super salacious.
There's this whole publishingcompany out of Chicago.
(09:28):
They are amazing.
JR says, well, no, not only haveI heard of them in Chicago, I
think they're out of Dallas too.
That's crazy.
Do you want me to say somethingto them when I go back?
Jay's like, no, you don't haveto do all that.
But Valen is looking at the sideof her eye, like, okay, if he's
interested, I know I'm introuble for real, for real.
JR pretends like nothing'swrong.
Valen, baby girl, you make amean glass of tea.
(09:50):
I'll see y'all soon, okay?
Bye-bye.
It's weird, but it's wonderful.
And I'm also having a little bitof trouble figuring out what
season JR is from because hisface looks more full.
He definitely looks differentthan the JR I'm watching in real
time now.
Okay, okay.
What a pleasant surprise.
Not gonna lie, towards the end,I started to get a little bit of
(10:13):
deja vu.
I thought to myself, am I gonnahave to turn this off?
Are y'all gonna pull the samelittle stunt you pulled season
three, episode two?
Luckily, that was not the case.
But let's rewind a little bitand discuss the bit player.
The bit player is that weirdoguy.
I've already forgotten his name.
He's the new shop manager or thenew he's a new Gary.
(10:34):
The weirdo guy, remember?
Well, Karen is very fond of him.
She's fond of the way he'srunning things, or at least the
way he's getting acclimated, andshe likes the way he decorates
his office.
He has all these like toy cars,model cars that he's designed
and put up.
It looks really good.
But she's a little bit stressedbecause with the price of parts
going up, she doesn't want thatto affect the customers at all.
(10:57):
She wants to give the same greatworld-class service without the
super high price tag.
And new weirdo guy, it's like,oh yeah, don't worry about that.
I think I know a few people.
We can probably get the hookup.
She's like, Bet.
You would think she'd be alittle more cautious,
considering her whole husband isin a grave in behind cheap
(11:17):
parts.
She didn't seem to it didn'tseem to cross her mind, despite
what else is going on during theshow.
So Weirdo Guy, I'm gonna callhim Warren.
I can't remember, it doesn'tmatter.
I'll I'll figure it out nextepisode.
Weirdo guy does the naturalthing.
He was sort of pulled to theside by the mafioso types, so he
(11:39):
goes to the mafioso types.
Now he's thinking he's doing agood thing.
Hey guys, I got great news.
You remember that Karen Fairgatelady?
Yeah, she needs new parts.
We can start running that wholescam again.
You can bring in your stolenparts, I can get them sold,
blah, blah, blah.
They get mad, they get bucked inhis face.
Now, two things stand out to meon this set this scene.
(12:00):
Well, three, it is a beautifulhome, be exquisite view.
You can see downtown LA.
It's like 20 miles out, and it'sup in the Hollywood Hills.
Beautiful sparkling pool.
I'm like, oh my god, it'sstunning.
Not the best place to die, quitefrankly.
And new Gary Weirdo guy has noidea that he's walking into a
(12:22):
trap.
These people don't like him likethat.
Number two, the two little mobguys who are up in Weirdo Gary's
face.
I can tell right away, they'renot really in the mob like that.
They're not enforcers.
I've watched enough movies toknow, trust me.
They really got it like that.
(12:42):
I was so distracted in thisscene by beautiful scenery.
Number two, the fact that thesetwo boholes, there's nothing at
all, and I do mean nothing atall intimidating, about them.
And the third thing that stoodout the most and that was the
most distracting was one of themwas dressed in the loudest bad
cut salmon pants I've ever seenin my life.
(13:03):
I was so just baby.
What do you have on?
He dressed the way a cartooncharacter looks.
Not even a cartoon character.
Like when you're in the first orsecond grade and you can't
really draw like that, and allof your people are square, they
look like refrigerators.
He's built like a refrigerator.
Not body shaming.
I'm just saying, if you'resquare, you're square.
You don't cut your body in half,or excuse me, in his case, three
(13:26):
quarters up, with high-waistedsalmon-colored pants and a
horizontal striped shirt.
I was so distracted.
Like, what is he gonna do?
Where are you going?
What do you have on?
There's no way in hell I wouldlet somebody punk me in
salmon-colored pants, but that'sjust me.
Weirdo new face Gary and I arecut from a different cloth.
(13:48):
They start threatening to pushhim in the swimming pool.
He's like, I can't swim.
I thought you guys be happy.
He's like, they're like, no, no,no, no.
Listen, dude, you don't know uslike that.
We don't know you like that.
We don't sell stolen car parts.
You get it?
Swear on your mother.
They're gonna douse this man inthe pool in this crisp, clear,
sparkling, beautiful BeverlyHills pool because he was going
(14:08):
to bring them business.
Can you imagine?
So, what the heck do you havehim in that position for?
What the heck do you have himthere at the shop for?
It ain't really none of mybusiness, but all I know is a
weirdo dude, Wayne, or Wayne.
Yeah, I think that's his name.
Wayne.
What did I say?
Warren?
Wayne Warren, something likethat.
He's a little shook if becausethey were gonna drown him.
(14:30):
They just want to make sure he'sdotting his eyes, crossing his
T, and I guess keeping an eye onKaren Fairgate.
JR is in town because Abby hassent him the book.
Only she didn't send every pieceof the book, which is very, very
bright.
She skipped about four or fivechapters, like two, six, five,
eleven, eighteen, something likethat.
The important ones, obviously.
(14:52):
It doesn't seem to matter thatmuch to JR.
He seems jovial nonetheless.
It's almost like he wants thisdamn book to come out.
So one night, Gary is at homewith the kids.
They are preparing dinner.
When I say they, I mean Olivia.
Girl, tell me why Olivia ispreparing dinner.
Olivia is chopping up a freshsalad.
(15:15):
Her brother's coming in there.
He's got an attitude because hedon't want meatloaf.
He wanted steak, like he paysanybody's bills.
And apparently Gary don't payanybody's bills either because
he just got fired.
But Olivia knows how to handlehim.
She's like, okay, that's cute.
Go wash your hands.
We'll be eating in a minute.
Before we go any further, Abbydoesn't work, right?
(15:36):
And neither does Gary.
Why is this baby making dinner?
I'm gonna be Judgy Wudgy was amillennial for a second, only to
have the truth slap me in theface.
I have helped prepare dinnermany a times.
Not cook, but I definitely hadto set the table, you know, make
(15:56):
a fresh salad, blah blah blah.
There's nothing wrong with that.
There's nothing wrong with that.
However, if neither one of theadults in the home are working,
why is this baby preparingmeals?
Well, luckily, she gets the ickwhen her mom comes in from a
hard day of shopping for newplaces to live.
(16:19):
I'm very conflicted.
I'm very conflicted as I watchthis because although I don't
like that, I don't like what'shappening.
I can't deny that there might bea little more chemistry between
Gary and Abby than there wasGary and Valen, the Vidalia
Onion Queen.
Quite frankly, I think Vidalianeeds to spread her wing, so
this is this is all good.
However, I like Abby's housebetter than I like Valen's.
(16:45):
And you know what?
It would kind of suck to have tomove, but also they're obviously
Persona non grata in the in thecul de sac.
It's much too, it's just goingto make things awkward.
They're way too tight-knit, it'sway too close.
It's just going to make thingsawkward.
They need to find a place wherethey can thrive.
So I get it, but she's the oneout shopping for the house.
(17:07):
So I'm trying to figure outseveral things this episode.
Val is still living in the home,but without Gary having a job,
who's paying the light bills?
Who's doing all these things?
Doesn't matter.
Abby comes into the kitchen andshe's like, I'm so sorry.
It's so exhausting.
I've looked high and low, lowand high everywhere for a place
to live.
I just I don't know what else todo.
How's the job search?
(17:28):
Gary says, Well, Olivia said Ishould be a movie star because
I'm handsome and whatnot.
Olivia did say that it justpisses me off.
She's not wrong, but she iswrong, but she's also a child.
So it doesn't really matter.
But like then being him beingthe family man, I would I'm so
(17:49):
conflicted.
It should piss me off a littlebit more than it does.
I think I'm a little bitshocked.
That's what it is.
I'm shocked at how how easy itseems.
The entire family seems to haveslipped into this rhythm.
Uh, this is mommy, this isdaddy, this is a beautiful
little family of four.
(18:10):
He gets to play house, and I'mlike, shouldn't this be a little
bit jarring?
Shouldn't this be a little bituncomfortable?
Even for the kids, you wouldthink.
But I have to stop and rememberthat they're probably way more
used to him being there than theaudience is aware of.
Obviously, not you ogs, but assomeone watching it for the
(18:30):
first time, it does seem kind ofstrange.
This is only maybe the fourth orfifth time I've seen him with
the kids, really.
But they seem to have a wholething.
They are a family, the kids aregrossed out when the parents
start kissing and smooching oneach other.
And it's like it doesn't seemnatural, but it seems easy.
You know what I'm saying?
It seems too easy almost.
I don't really know what Abbyhas up her sleeve, other than
(18:52):
the fact that she does want tomarry Gary.
Apparently, she wants to be aYui.
I know this because right aboutthe time that the kids get the
ick and Gary and and Abby aresmooch-a doochin in the kitchen.
He ain't got no job, they ain'tgot no new house, but they're
just in love, and that's allthey need.
Phone rings, it's JR.
(19:12):
He's like, Can you meet metomorrow for lunch?
She pretends like it's hergirlfriend.
Hey girl, yeah, I can meet youfor lunch tomorrow.
Well, when she meets JR forlunch, he wants to know where
the rest of the chapters are,and also like, why would you
only send me these bits andpieces?
Abby says, I need to know what'sin that daggone will.
Gary told me that he feels likeJock really, really liked Valen.
(19:37):
So there's a very hugepossibility that his inheritance
is tied to Valen.
Again, JR does not seem all thatbothered by this because he
already knows.
So he's like, Okay, let me seewhat I can find out, and then
you know, you give me the restof the chapters.
So she does that.
Later on in the episode, shebrings over the missing
chapters, she presents them tohim, he's pouring the champagne,
(19:59):
and he just kind of laughs ather because he thinks she's
like, Well, where is the where'sthe will?
I don't have the will.
JR, how dare you?
He's like, Well, no, I mean,don't worry about it.
I don't have the will, but Idefinitely know what's in it.
Gary's about to come into awhole lot of money.
So she clinks the glass andshe's so happy.
But JR really wants to knowwhat's going on.
Okay, girl, you you're way toosmart.
(20:19):
And I feel really bad for Garyat this point because I don't
think he can handle you.
What exactly is it that youwant?
JR is thinking she wants to bequeen of the ewing.
She wants to go back to Dallasand run shop.
She's like, I want Gary, that'swhat I want.
So he tells this story aboutGary growing up.
When he was 16 years old, hewanted this motorcycle.
Let JR call it a motorcycle.
(20:41):
And Jock told Gary he wouldn'tjust buy it for him, like he
does everything else.
You're gonna have to earn it.
So Gary did.
He woke up early, he stayed uplate, whatever they asked him to
do, whether it was shucking cowdung or working on an oil rig.
He said rig, so I'm like, Ididn't think there was oil on
Ewing Land, but he definitelysaid rig.
Anyway, Gary gets to themotorcycle showroom floor and
(21:06):
promptly drives it through theglass window.
Now, you and I hearing thisstory, the moral of the story is
don't give a 16-year-old amotorcycle if he's never been on
one.
Maybe take it outside.
But to JR's point, he's tryingto say that, you know, Gary's
immature.
Gary will work really, reallyhard for something and then
he'll blow it all to bits andpieces.
(21:28):
Abby says, Ah, it takesdifferent people different time
to grow up.
So what?
So what he drove through a glasspane window.
It is what it is.
JR said, you know what?
Okay, cool, cool.
So let's let's let's do thisthen.
I need you to do something forme, and I'll do something for
you.
She says, Well, what do youwant?
(21:49):
I want you to keep Gary out ofDallas.
It's kind of a weird ask, right?
Abby says, What makes you thinkI would want to be in Dallas?
JR thinks that she wants to bequeen of the Ewings, like I said
earlier.
Come to Dallas, run shop,basically steal his thunder,
which doesn't seem like that wason anybody's radar.
(22:09):
JR says to her, Listen, you arenot Valen.
Valen managed to keep that manout of Dallas.
He didn't want anything to dowith Dallas when he was with
her.
I don't want that changing upall of a sudden when he's with
you.
I'll give you all the money,you'll get the jewels, you're
finna get all the things youneed.
Just keep your little narrowbehind out of North Texas.
She's like, done, dude.
(22:31):
I'm in LA.
Do you really think I'm gonna goto Dallas and do what exactly?
So he says, okay, cool.
So if I do, what do I get fromyou?
He says, My blessing.
It I don't know if anything wasinsinuated here, but I guess
time will tell.
I'm not even gonna ask thequestion, but just there's
something sitting in the back ofmy mind.
(22:53):
I hope I interpreted that theright way.
Doesn't really matter.
Abby knows she's about to comeup on some money.
So by the end of the episode,she tells Gary they're going to
some party.
Now, whose party?
I don't know, because neitherone of them have any friends.
They end up going to thisapartment, and it is butt naked.
So there's absolutely nothing inthere.
And she says, Listen, babe, Igot this for you.
(23:14):
I put a small deposit down.
Not just so you can get away.
I'm not pushing you out oranything, but you need a place
of your own.
Not only so you can avoidBaleen, but you know you might
want to get away from me fromtime to time.
She bought him a man cave.
He's grateful.
So grateful that he takes herinto the next room and takes her
down right there on the carpetfloor.
No bed, no nothing, no curtains.
(23:39):
I'm feeling more and moreneutral about the Gary Abby
situation.
It makes me roll my eyes, butalso I think I finally come to
the point where I've justaccepted it.
But I don't know, Abby, thatwell.
It seems out of character.
The thing I hated for Valen isthat Valen kind of got swallowed
(24:01):
into his identity, didn't reallydevelop one for herself.
She has the opportunity to dothat now.
Abby has her own identity, andshe seemed like she's way too
tough to lose that.
But girl, do you not see thatyou're kind of slipping into the
same sort of patterns that Valwas?
The same thing that you scoff atValen for being his mommy and
(24:22):
taking care of him in that way.
You're doing the same thing.
And maybe that's what JR wassort of pointing out.
Like, I mean, he's a big kid.
Gary's a big kid.
But Abby has also seen him asthe man.
That's all she knows.
So time will tell.
I don't think it's necessarilywrong that she found him an
apartment.
I just think I think it it will.
(24:46):
I think it's the first of a longline of things she's gonna have
to get used to doing for him.
It's interesting though.
I feel like with the personalitythat he's shown so far, having
somebody as tough as Abby mightjust work in his favor.
I don't know.
Uh I don't see him leaving her.
She's gonna have to get bored ofhim.
(25:08):
You know who's not bored?
Me?
Let's talk about KarenFarragate.
Karen Farragate is not boredbecause she is knee-deep into
all these transcripts, and it'sgonna get her in trouble.
Joe and Mac already had a littlediscussion about it.
Joe convinces Mac, like, yo, youshe's my you don't know my
(25:29):
sister.
My sister's a pit bull in askirt.
She's gonna keep going and goingand going until she finds
something, and then she's notgonna let it go.
Mac starts to consider this andand consider who it is she's
investigating.
If she keeps that energy up, herapproaching them, there's only
one way that's going to end, andthat's the last thing he wants
(25:49):
for her.
So one night Karen is hostingdinner, everybody but Gary and
Abby invited, and uh Max showsup, she starts flipping out on
him immediately.
You gotta respect it though.
It's like I respect people whoare themselves all day, every
day, 24 hours a day.
(26:09):
She doesn't mind that herfriends are there.
She starts flipping out becauseshe's figured out that the
dudes, the mafioso types, gotoff on a technicality.
She is furious, and she's moremad that Mac didn't tell her.
So he's trying to calm her down.
He's a little bit embarrassedbecause he hadn't really met
everybody like that.
Ginger and Laura are like, Oh,girl, he's fine.
(26:29):
Who is that?
Oh, he's fine.
And let me just say this they'renot lying.
Episode two has really done itfor me.
Y'all, Mac is fine, fine.
I I like I like what I see here.
Mag is hot.
It's it's more than just thejerry curl for me.
It's it's more than just the uhmedium outfits.
(26:55):
He's got swag.
He's gonna he's tough withoutbeing goofy.
I don't know.
He's hot.
I'm into it.
I'm into it a lot.
I hope he doesn't get shot likeI think you will.
Anyway, pop Mac is like, yo,Karen, calm the F down.
Joe says the same thing.
So they they managed to corralher into the kitchen, and Mac's
(27:16):
like, listen, I care about you.
I don't want you digging intothese people.
I'm sorry I didn't tell youevery single little piece of it.
I'm sorry.
Joe comes in and he's like,listen to her, listen to him,
please.
He's trying to help you.
I agree with him.
You need to calm the F down.
She's still going off.
She must sleep on it and come toher senses because the next day
she shows up at Mac's office andshe keeps kicking the door.
(27:37):
This man is very patient.
I would cuss you out if I'm atwork.
Don't kick my door six times.
But it's because she has like abox full of stuff.
She go, he goes to open thedoor, she comes in and she
basically apologizes for actinga fool the night previous and
says she's prepared to give himback the uh the transcripts.
He says, Well, if you want anymore, you're on your own, kiddo.
I just can't be doing this.
(27:59):
This is very dangerous.
She's like, I understand.
I'm not Michael Colleone.
I got caught up for a moment.
I thought I was in theGodfather.
I'm not.
I'm sorry.
I don't believe she's gonnastop.
There's just no way.
Maybe she won't go as hard,maybe she'll be a little more
stealthy, but there is zerochance on earth that Karen
Farragate is not gonna take thisto the ends of the earth to get
to the bottom of us to make surethat these men are held
(28:22):
accountable for what they did.
Now, Max's point is that thesesorts of guys, they never
they're not a one and done typecrew.
They're not gonna just run thisPonzi scheme or run this
whatever on this other side.
They're gonna keep doing thingseventually, they're gonna get
caught.
So he's basically telling her,let's play the long game, let's
(28:43):
let's just stack as muchevidence as possible against
them.
Eventually, we're gonna getthem.
I promise you, it's gonna happenbecause they're not gonna stop.
I love that.
Also, I love Joe still being thevoice of reason here.
He's like, girl, that's why wehave laws, that's why we have
people to enforce the laws.
Richard even told her the samething.
He's like, People like you andme, we don't get in bed with
(29:05):
these other types of guys.
We're we're a different breed ofpeople.
You cannot play the same rules,don't apply.
There's you can't just burstinto their operation going off
expecting that to end well foryou.
There are people put in place,i.e., Mac, who are who can
handle that.
SPEAKER_00 (29:23):
Let him do his job, trust him to do his job.
Speaking of jobs, Joe's got abrand new one.
SPEAKER_01 (29:38):
Part of it is being the new editor, the other part
is calming Valen Ewing down.
I already touched on this alittle bit.
She is not handling this newbook well, she is freaking the F
out.
On top of that, she's alsorearranging her house like she's
painted.
She got rid of all the otherfurniture that Gary's that was
Gary's or that it was Gary'smama's.
Got rid of that.
Her and Lily Mae are Rebuildingtheir life piece by piece.
(30:02):
So Joe explains that he'dexplained to JR earlier that the
publishing business isn't sogreat, and that I guess his
company was going to be sold.
Looks like they found a buyer,right?
I'm confusing this a little bit,but it doesn't really matter.
By the end, it doesn't matter.
The new owners of Joe andValen's publishing people
(30:25):
company, they're in town, andJoe wants Valen to meet them.
She's like, Oh my god, I can'tmeet dude.
No, please, no.
My house isn't ready.
I don't, I have like threepieces of furniture.
I am in no position to hostanything.
And I really don't feel likegoing to another party.
Last time I went to a party,found my man in bed with the
Hoochie next door.
Joe's like, relax.
(30:48):
They didn't actually say thatpart, but just think about it.
The last time she was promotingthis book, that's exactly what
happened.
I think she's past that.
She's just like, dude, I'm notin a position.
I'm so sick of this right now.
I can't do it.
Valen, just talk to thesepeople.
It'll only be them.
You can invite your neighborsover.
It'll be super sweet.
I couldn't help but notice thatwhen the new editor, the new
(31:10):
owners come over, it's a cutehusband and wife, older couple.
The wife is giddy because she'srun the she has read the book
front to back, back to fronttwice.
She loves it so much.
She wants the tea.
She's like, girl, is this aboutthe Ewings for real?
For real?
Please tell me this is true.
Valen is still pushing thatnarrative.
That it's not true.
It's it's fictionalized.
(31:31):
I made it all up.
But it doesn't matter.
There's a point where she is bythe fireplace and Joe is
standing right behind her.
He's like right up on her.
They look so good together.
I really, really hope that pansout.
They look so good together.
Joe's hot too, but I'm I'm kindof into Mac now.
(31:52):
Well, the they have a littleparty.
Everybody's there.
Like I said, I fell asleepearlier, so I didn't catch it.
But when I watch it again,somebody was reading pieces.
Let me rewind a little bit.
New owners are there.
They love Valen.
New owner's wife loves Valen'sbook.
(32:14):
Joe wants Valen to relax and seethat this is not going to be as
painful as she thinks it is.
Just talk to these people.
Boom, boom, boom.
New owner, older gentleman,pulls out the cover of Valen's
book, Capricorn Sun, not cornpwn or Capricorn Porn, as JR
called it.
The front cover is elementary atbest.
(32:34):
I don't know who did the art onthe front, but Valen's headshot
on the back is stunning.
They should put that on thefront.
It is so pretty.
But later on, we are blessedwith a small little chapter.
We get a little piece of thisliterary masterpiece.
(32:55):
Y'all, the book is so salacious.
It is so juicy.
Somebody is reading it out loud.
It took me two or three looks tofigure out that's Diana.
What happened to Diana's hair?
Lord.
Here's the thing, here's thething, here's the thing.
I like a short perm.
I just said that I love Maxhair.
I do.
(33:16):
I it it it transformed her in away that it's not bad.
I just don't think that look isfor her.
I didn't realize who that wasuntil I listened a few more
times.
I was like, oh my god, that'sDiana.
Girl, Diana reading the book outloud.
Like it's like it's Edgar AllanPoe or something.
(33:37):
Ginger is hot and bothered.
She's got her top buttonunfastened.
Kitty's probably looking fromher crossroom, like, oh yeah,
you know what's up.
Kitty, go warm up the car.
You know what's up.
Reading a rather smutty excerptfrom the book.
Max standing behind her.
He's grinning.
He's into it too.
(33:57):
He's smiling and what kind ofy'all.
This is not this isn't the sortof book you read out loud.
This is the sort of book thatyou you go to the dollar store,
right?
And you get one of those bookswith the slippery sleeves, and
you just put that over the smutyou're reading in the airport.
You don't need everybody knowingwhat you're reading.
(34:20):
Oh my gosh.
It it sounds like it's verysalacious.
It seems like a romance novel.
So I see what she's saying.
This is this is fictionalized.
It definitely reads like aDanielle Steele, from what I
heard.
From what I'm not gonna callDiana chickenhead.
That's so rude.
But I'm not into it.
I don't like Diana's new hair.
(34:40):
Hate it.
Hated it.
Among the neighbors at the partyis a very annoyed, very
irritated, very pregnant, verypast her due date pregnant type
Laura.
She's over this ish.
The long and short of it is thatshe doesn't want to have a
natural childbirth, andRichard's getting on her last
damn nerves talking about it.
It seems like he's being morepossessive, but the more I
(35:01):
watch, the more I realize he'sjust I don't know, he's kind of
hyper-fixated, and like he hasanything else to do.
He's reading all of thescenarios.
I guess a lawyer would be likethat.
He'd be very into the literatureabout childbirth and why natural
is so good.
Laura had stopped by the Knott'sLanding Motor one day to talk to
Karen, telling her that girl, Ineed my epideral.
(35:25):
I need to be doped up.
I'm not trying to have nonatural childbirth.
Karen's like, girl, it's sowonderful.
You should look at I don't Idon't agree with that.
It's so wonderful.
You should look into it.
It's it's so much more tochildbirth than pain.
Yeah, I get that.
To each their own, do you?
But also let people make theirown decisions.
(35:47):
It isn't like this is Laura'sfirst baby.
I I guess she would have beenknocked out the first time.
She's acting like she's neverexperienced labor.
Seems sort of impossible.
But Karen's like, girl, justdon't worry about the pain.
Ella's like, girl, no, it ain'tthe pain.
Do you know people die fromthis?
Do you know people actually diegiving birth?
Yeah, that is very true.
Very true.
Let her be comfortable.
I think she's just over it.
(36:08):
She's annoyed.
It's kind of everything iscompiling on itself.
So flashback to this littleparty Valen is hosting in her
house, her very scantlyfurniturized house.
Richard and the gang areoverlooking at the book cover.
Everybody's fawning over howgorgeous it is.
Laura is sitting very calmly onthe couch and she said, Richard,
we need to leave.
(36:29):
And he goes, Man, we can't leavenow.
Yes, we need to leave now.
He goes, Oh my god, are youhaving another contraction?
He seems to think they're stillBraxton Hicks.
Braxton Hicks aren't isn't thatat the beginning of the
pregnancy or like towards themiddle?
It wouldn't be at the end.
If she's a week over her duedate, she's probably having a
real contraction.
He doesn't seem to think that'sthe case.
She says, Okay, no, I'm nothaving a contraction.
(36:50):
My water just broke.
Her water just broke on a babyblue couch.
Oh my god, I just realized thatVal painted her whole house baby
blue.
Is that a what is that?
Yeah, well, uh Laura says thatshe she just her water just
broke on the baby blue couch,but later on, it's just Val and
(37:13):
um Joe, I think, Lily May andthe publishing couple.
When the phone rings, the dudetakes a phone call.
J.R.
Ewing, long story short, hasinvested in his company.
He's now the owner of it.
That new that uh publishingcompany is now under the
umbrella of Ewing Oil.
I don't know what that meansgoing forward because, like I
(37:35):
said, he doesn't seem all thatupset.
JR that is, he does not seem allthat upset about the book, and
more than anything, he seemsentertained, very unbothered.
So maybe he does want it to comeout.
I don't know.
And now with him being part ofthe publishing company, who's to
say he can't make changes rightthere at the end?
Who knows?
(37:56):
Maybe it'll never see the lightof day, maybe it will.
Doesn't seem like it'd be thatdifficult just to go to another
publishing company since there'salready buzz, but I don't know.
This is 1982, this is not 2025,I have no idea.
What I do know is that Laura andRidge are on their way to the
hospital when, of course,because it's nighttime, there's
obviously construction in themiddle of the road.
(38:18):
Everyone knows if you're on asoap opera, there's always going
to be night construction, sothey have to bust the Yui and
take a super secret alternateroute to the hospital down the
back roads.
Now I didn't know LA had backroads, but I mean, what do I
know?
They end up slipping and slidingon the road because it's wet.
Again, we're soap tack, soaptack, soap tacks.
(38:40):
Slam through a fence.
Oh my gosh, no, no, now we'restuck.
Laura's pissed.
Richard, fix the tire, take myass to the hospital.
He can.
He's like, I can't, I can'tchange it.
I'm stuck.
She ends up going into a morefrantic type of labor.
He he gets his hunter-gathereron and manages to find a single
(39:01):
lone orange and forces it downher throat so her throat doesn't
get dry from breathing.
She's still freaking out.
She's like, No, no, no, having akid hurts.
I'm not really trying to gothrough this pain.
My mama told me just to lay hereand let it pass.
Richard's like, it doesn'treally work like that.
I tend to agree with Richard.
So, meanwhile, back in Nant'sLanding, Karen has decided to go
(39:22):
over to Richard and Laura'shouse because Jason is getting
upset.
He hadn't heard from hisparents, and he was expecting a
phone call once they got to thehospital.
He's excited, he wants a babysister, and Karen's youngest
boy, Michael, is over there withhim.
But she she talks Mac intowalking over there with her to
hang out with the kids, and hedoes an amazing job.
(39:45):
He he tells Jason nothing tofret over, they're just busy
with the baby, and he's like,Your dad's probably pacing up
and down the hallway.
He does this whole little thing,and you could tell it puts Jason
at ease.
They faint on the couch, theyhave popcorn.
It makes him 10 times hotterthan I already think he is.
Yeah, I said it.
I said it.
It's true.
Jeez, Louise.
(40:06):
It's it's it's the confidencefor me, it's the swag.
He he seems to be in control.
He could have very well poppedoff at Karen.
I don't think he ever would, buthe's he's in control in a better
way.
Like he's not afraid to step toher.
He has no problem letting herknow what's going on.
She has no problem yelling backat him, she has no problem
yelling at anybody.
But to see him be so at easewith her family, I like it.
(40:30):
And I like that Joe likes him.
I like it all.
I'm not mad about this, this newcasting.
Okay, so eventually Laura has nochoice but to start pushing.
Richard has no choice but tostart coaching, but she is
fading fast.
The more she pushes, the moreshe starts having these really
invasive thoughts.
She starts remembering this girlwho died in high school.
(40:51):
She starts remembering how manywomen die at childbirth.
It just starts getting really,really more morbid.
Richard starts to get reallyworried.
He can tell that the baby'sheart rate is dropping.
He's like, Laura, please,please, please.
He's something's wrong.
You gotta push, please.
She does, it's like she refusesto push again.
Soap tax, soap tax, soap tax.
(41:12):
I'm not a gynecologist, but Ifeel like your body if something
wants to come out, it's gonnacome out.
It is much harder to keepsomething in than it is to push
it out.
So she's just talking verycasually, and he's like, Honey,
you're 99% there.
Please, you have to get themout.
So he screams at her, and she Iguess she mentally pushes.
(41:35):
I don't know.
She doesn't seem to bestraining.
Because oh, there he is.
Richard goes down to pick up ababy.
And maybe it's me.
Uh maybe everybody in the 80skept betting in their back seat
because the baby is quicklyswaddled.
Only he's not crying.
This is where I started to getnervous, and I'm like, Y'all,
(41:56):
please don't do this to meagain.
Can we not?
Can we not open every seasonwith something devastating?
Luckily, Richard, because he wasnerding out for the last six
months and he read every singlearticle and book, and he knows
all about anesthesia versus thespinal tap or whatever.
He knows about CPR and he knowsexactly how many baby breaths to
(42:20):
give his new baby.
And he puff puffs in the baby'smouth, puff, puff, pass, puff,
puff, pass.
Boom.
Lil baby starts crying.
Laura is immediately snapped outof her stupor.
Oh, I'm so sorry, baby.
I almost killed you.
I'm so sorry, my bad.
So then they gotta get down tothe business of naming the boy,
baby boy.
(42:40):
And he's like Alan.
And all I'm thinking is, okay,this is a millennial.
We can't, what kind of name Ithought his name would be like.
We already got a Michael,Jason's a very good name.
Justin, something like that, iswhat I was thinking.
Brian, well, we already got oneof those.
Dang, I'm just naming all thenames they got.
I just talked all that trashabout there only being so many
(43:00):
names in rotation up until 1930.
And I literally can't think ofvery many more boy names other
than Michael, Brian, Jason,Justin.
I'm trying to think of people Iwent to school with.
They end up going with Daniel,and I'm like, oh, I kind of
forgot that was the name of thisepisode.
So baby Daniel is healthy andwell, born in the backseat of a
Mercedes man.
(43:21):
That's a great burving story.
That is an incredible story.
I bet he still wants to hearthat every Christmas.
Not a bad episode.
I am really, really itching tosee.
I'm gonna actually go ahead andpush play on Dallas right after
this.
They're not syncing up.
This is all happening becausethis is my first time watching
it, but I'm really wondering howthat how that plays out.
(43:42):
And because this is so farahead.
You see what I mean?
Like this is 1982, Knott'sLanding.
Jock has already been deceased.
They already know this, they'realready to the point where
they're gonna read the will.
JR said they're gonna read it inabout a month.
But on Knott's Landing, I hadn'teven seen Ellie yet.
Excuse me, not on Knott'sLanding.
On Dallas, I hadn't even seenEllie yet.
(44:02):
So it can't be long, but we needto figure out what happened to
Kristen too.
So I'm gonna go ahead and wrapthis up.
I hope you guys enjoy this.
Thank you again for yourpatience.
Join me next time as we jumpback into another vintage prime
time soap opera episode ofExodus.
In the meantime, in betweentime, stay hydrated, stay
(44:23):
moisturized, mind your ownbusiness, and keep all of your
drama on TV.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
welcome and welcome back toSnowflor.
We have personal gathering placefor you.
We acknowledge that the NOTdialogue and the golden name
contact.
And your host just contactstorylines of the 1990s.
Okay, we're back on the WestCoast when we add still need to
(00:23):
know that.
So whether you're going to thenstart for the list goes back in
the door, I don't think it's notfive outside.
No, I don't think that's onepoint of time.
I don't want to talk about 200.
(01:02):
I know the day is taken outwell.
I hope the hard one behind yougot the thing take care.
I hope you're chilling.
I hope you're at your best.
And I hope you're ready for afun fold edition of Soapor.
Or so I thought.
The word fun is quite literallythe most relative word in that
(01:26):
whole statement.
Because um I I'm not sure I madethe right choice today.
I I already told you lastepisode.
I'm just gonna be vibing, I'mgonna be chilling, I'm gonna be
watching all of my stories,right?
I'm gonna catch up, I'm gonnaget ahead, I'm gonna fully
immerse myself for the nextmonth or so in my stories.
So I said to myself, I said,Jet, out of all the stories, if
(01:48):
these people were real, if theywere your actual neighbors, who
would you be the most nosy with?
Who would you be the mostcurious about?
Knott's Landing, obviously,right?
It was between Knott's Landingto me and Dallas today.
I thought, okay, which one am Igonna do?
I decided on Knott's Landing.
10 minutes into the show, I'malready stressed the hell out.
(02:09):
This was supposed to be a fun,relaxing moment.
I'm not relaxing.
And I'm thinking to myself, isit because I've had a rough day?
No.
They're just stressing me outalready.
What the hell?
I'm gonna try my best to getthrough half of this show.
As a matter of fact, I'm gonnaremove this microphone here.
I'm gonna put it in a differentroom.
I'm gonna watch half of the showand then I'm gonna move on.
(02:32):
Go ahead and pour yourself upsomething bubbly and bright as
we jump into season four,episode two of Knott's Landing.
Daniel.
Who the hell is Daniel?
Got ourselves the firstcrossover episode of the season.
J.R., big JR Ewing is in SoCal.
(02:53):
He's in the back of a limo,cackling, reading, no doubt,
Valen's transcript, cackling.
He thinks it's the funniestthing he's ever seen in his
life.
He switched out the regular maledriver for a hottie blonde
driver.
She's like, What's so funny?
He's like, I'm just reading mylife story.
Kiki Kiki Kiki.
He's there to stir up trouble.
One of the first scenes we seebeside that, though, speaking of
(03:16):
trouble, is of Mac.
I've decided to call him andJoe.
Joe's like, Mac, what the heckwere you thinking?
Why did you give my sister thosethose transcripts from the
court?
Mac said, Well, I mean, it'spublic record.
It isn't like I could very wellkeep that from her.
Joe says, I know, but you don'treally know my sister.
Mind you, they're doing thiswhole thing in very heavy New
(03:37):
York accents.
They're they're uh they'rehomeboys, they're they're
comrades, want you to know thatthey're from the same part of
the country.
So it's it's you know, let me bereal with you, you be real with
me.
You giving my sister this islike lighting a match in a
gasoline factory.
She doesn't just want to knowhow the trial went, she's
looking for an out.
She feels like something ismissing, and that's what she's
(03:58):
combing over.
Do you know, good sir officerMac, that she hit up our
neighbor no less than eighttimes yesterday?
Mac says, Okay, and what's thatgot to do with me?
Well, our neighbor, as Joe tellshim, is a dude named Richard who
is a lawyer.
She's she's definitely going topursue this, my guy.
Why did you open this can ofworms?
He's like, Listen, I didn'treally want to, but what can I
(04:20):
tell the lady?
Like I said, this is publicrecord.
Mac lets down his guard and hetells Joe, this sort of to me
feels like somebody dropped theball.
Like the DA was pointing thefinger at so-and-so, so-and-so
is pointing the finger at DA.
Meanwhile, it feels likesomebody missed something.
Joe agrees.
He says, It looks like, based onwhat Karen has dug up, that this
(04:43):
guy got off on a technicality.
She's not gonna let this go.
I know I said it was 10 minutesin.
I'm only six minutes in.
Okay, I promise I'm putting itdown.
So, what does happen the first10 minutes of this episode?
I'll tell you what happened.
Uh, the proverbial fecal matterhits the van.
(05:03):
J.R.
Ewing is showing up in Knot'sLanding, not because he's
checking on his good old littlebaby brother and his wife.
It's not because he needs somemore sun.
There's plenty of sun in Dallas.
He's showing up because Abbylast episode sent him the full
transcript of Valen Ewing'sbook.
I'm starting to believe thisbook is never going to happen
(05:25):
because there's so much dramaalready.
Now, she, being Valen, is backat home pacing back and forth.
She's talking to Joe, who hasbecome her new editor.
She is freaking the F out.
This diary entry that turnedinto a 300-page essay has now
turned into a novel, has nowturned into one of the most
salacious topics in all of thewomen magazine.
(05:49):
There's some sort of spread andsome sort of lady magazine where
it's very clearly Pam and SueEllen and Miss Ellie.
It is very clearly them.
Like people are starting to pickup on who this book is really
about, which is great news forthe editor, great news for the
publisher.
But Valen is like, my God, Ithis listen, it's fiction.
Yes, the people I'm basing it onsomething, but I'm making up the
(06:13):
stories about it.
She clearly ain't making upstories good enough to
disassociate the people shewrote about.
It's just getting thicker andthicker.
One of the first things we seeis Laura and Richard coming back
from an appointment.
Guess they'd gone to thehospital because she was having
Braxton Hicks, and she didn'tknow what that was.
He was explaining that to her.
Now, part of me is like, okay,why would he need to explain
(06:36):
that to her?
He explains to her in theaudience, Richard, that is, that
Braxton Hicks contractions feela lot like real-term
contractions, only they're superfar apart, like yours were.
So I already knew you weren'treally in labor.
And she's apologizing to him.
I'm immediately disheartened bythis relationship already.
(06:56):
She works so hard to move on, tomove through, to co-parent, do
the things, only to now be backin his life, and she has shrunk
back into that role, baby.
She is back to being let mecoddle coddle you, Laura.
It is devastating.
That don't really matter becauseby the time that Richard and
Laura pull up to their home,they see JR's big old country
(07:17):
limousine.
Who is that?
Oh, that's Gary's brother.
What's his name?
Laura don't remember.
Richard doesn't remember.
But Richard walks over and hesays, Hey, you looking for Gary?
JR does the polite thing.
Hey, Mr.
Uh Avery, Richard Avery.
Gary doesn't live with Valenanymore.
He's living at uh Abby's house.
And JR is like, oh word?
(07:37):
What you mean you live in atAbby's house?
Right away, Richard's like, oh,I guess you brothers don't talk
that often.
JR is like, you know how it is.
You know how Abby.
But go on, go ahead and tell me.
So what do you mean?
He's living at Abby's house,huh?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
He's been living there a coupleweeks now.
Valen lives at her house withher mama.
They don't live together.
They are basically separated.
(07:58):
JR is like, Word?
Dang, that's crazy.
Appreciate you, Mr.
Avery.
And instead of waiting for Garyat Abby's house, JR sees an
opportunity to stir the pot.
And by the grace of God, he'sgot a really big spoon.
He walks over to Val's house,knock, knock, knock, opens the
door.
She's already freaking outbecause of the book, only to
(08:20):
open the door and to see JR.
And she's like, oh my god, ohno, oh no.
Now JR is playing country dumb.
Nobody, and I mean nobody butAbby knows that he knows that
there's a book.
So when he walks in, I don'tknow if it's guilt or whatever,
Val has no choice but to sort ofspill the beans a little bit.
JR is like, yeah, we I've heardall sorts of things around
Dallas, but I told Mama and SueEllen and them, don't worry
(08:43):
about it.
Who would want to read aboutLittle Old Us?
What's the name of the bookcalled?
Porn Crude?
Porn Nasty?
Crudy Crude Dude.
She's like, it's calledCapricorn Crude.
By this time, Joe jumps in.
Everything's super casual, butJoe is none the wiser about who
JR really is.
You see, Joe being new, onlyknows a little bit about Gary.
(09:06):
He's not really judging hisentire family about it.
He didn't know what thisinformation he's about to spill
is going to do to Valen andGary's future.
I'm certainly sure of him.
So he starts explaining to JRthat yes, publishing is going
through a little bit of adrought.
However, this story is going tobe super salacious.
There's this whole publishingcompany out of Chicago.
(09:28):
They are amazing.
JR says, well, no, not only haveI heard of them in Chicago, I
think they're out of Dallas too.
That's crazy.
Do you want me to say somethingto them when I go back?
Jay's like, no, you don't haveto do all that.
But Valen is looking at the sideof her eye, like, okay, if he's
interested, I know I'm introuble for real, for real.
JR pretends like nothing'swrong.
Valen, baby girl, you make amean glass of tea.
(09:50):
I'll see y'all soon, okay?
Bye-bye.
It's weird, but it's wonderful.
And I'm also having a little bitof trouble figuring out what
season JR is from because hisface looks more full.
He definitely looks differentthan the JR I'm watching in real
time now.
Okay, okay.
What a pleasant surprise.
Not gonna lie, towards the end,I started to get a little bit of
(10:13):
deja vu.
I thought to myself, am I gonnahave to turn this off?
Are y'all gonna pull the samelittle stunt you pulled season
three, episode two?
Luckily, that was not the case.
But let's rewind a little bitand discuss the bit player.
The bit player is that weirdoguy.
I've already forgotten his name.
He's the new shop manager or thenew he's a new Gary.
(10:34):
The weirdo guy, remember?
Well, Karen is very fond of him.
She's fond of the way he'srunning things, or at least the
way he's getting acclimated, andshe likes the way he decorates
his office.
He has all these like toy cars,model cars that he's designed
and put up.
It looks really good.
But she's a little bit stressedbecause with the price of parts
going up, she doesn't want thatto affect the customers at all.
(10:57):
She wants to give the same greatworld-class service without the
super high price tag.
And new weirdo guy, it's like,oh yeah, don't worry about that.
I think I know a few people.
We can probably get the hookup.
She's like, Bet.
You would think she'd be alittle more cautious,
considering her whole husband isin a grave in behind cheap
(11:17):
parts.
She didn't seem to it didn'tseem to cross her mind, despite
what else is going on during theshow.
So Weirdo Guy, I'm gonna callhim Warren.
I can't remember, it doesn'tmatter.
I'll I'll figure it out nextepisode.
Weirdo guy does the naturalthing.
He was sort of pulled to theside by the mafioso types, so he
(11:39):
goes to the mafioso types.
Now he's thinking he's doing agood thing.
Hey guys, I got great news.
You remember that Karen Fairgatelady?
Yeah, she needs new parts.
We can start running that wholescam again.
You can bring in your stolenparts, I can get them sold,
blah, blah, blah.
They get mad, they get bucked inhis face.
Now, two things stand out to meon this set this scene.
(12:00):
Well, three, it is a beautifulhome, be exquisite view.
You can see downtown LA.
It's like 20 miles out, and it'sup in the Hollywood Hills.
Beautiful sparkling pool.
I'm like, oh my god, it'sstunning.
Not the best place to die, quitefrankly.
And new Gary Weirdo guy has noidea that he's walking into a
(12:22):
trap.
These people don't like him likethat.
Number two, the two little mobguys who are up in Weirdo Gary's
face.
I can tell right away, they'renot really in the mob like that.
They're not enforcers.
I've watched enough movies toknow, trust me.
They really got it like that.
(12:42):
I was so distracted in thisscene by beautiful scenery.
Number two, the fact that thesetwo boholes, there's nothing at
all, and I do mean nothing atall intimidating, about them.
And the third thing that stoodout the most and that was the
most distracting was one of themwas dressed in the loudest bad
cut salmon pants I've ever seenin my life.
(13:03):
I was so just baby.
What do you have on?
He dressed the way a cartooncharacter looks.
Not even a cartoon character.
Like when you're in the first orsecond grade and you can't
really draw like that, and allof your people are square, they
look like refrigerators.
He's built like a refrigerator.
Not body shaming.
I'm just saying, if you'resquare, you're square.
You don't cut your body in half,or excuse me, in his case, three
(13:26):
quarters up, with high-waistedsalmon-colored pants and a
horizontal striped shirt.
I was so distracted.
Like, what is he gonna do?
Where are you going?
What do you have on?
There's no way in hell I wouldlet somebody punk me in
salmon-colored pants, but that'sjust me.
Weirdo new face Gary and I arecut from a different cloth.
(13:48):
They start threatening to pushhim in the swimming pool.
He's like, I can't swim.
I thought you guys be happy.
He's like, they're like, no, no,no, no.
Listen, dude, you don't know uslike that.
We don't know you like that.
We don't sell stolen car parts.
You get it?
Swear on your mother.
They're gonna douse this man inthe pool in this crisp, clear,
sparkling, beautiful BeverlyHills pool because he was going
(14:08):
to bring them business.
Can you imagine?
So, what the heck do you havehim in that position for?
What the heck do you have himthere at the shop for?
It ain't really none of mybusiness, but all I know is a
weirdo dude, Wayne, or Wayne.
Yeah, I think that's his name.
Wayne.
What did I say?
Warren?
Wayne Warren, something likethat.
He's a little shook if becausethey were gonna drown him.
(14:30):
They just want to make sure he'sdotting his eyes, crossing his
T, and I guess keeping an eye onKaren Fairgate.
JR is in town because Abby hassent him the book.
Only she didn't send every pieceof the book, which is very, very
bright.
She skipped about four or fivechapters, like two, six, five,
eleven, eighteen, something likethat.
The important ones, obviously.
(14:52):
It doesn't seem to matter thatmuch to JR.
He seems jovial nonetheless.
It's almost like he wants thisdamn book to come out.
So one night, Gary is at homewith the kids.
They are preparing dinner.
When I say they, I mean Olivia.
Girl, tell me why Olivia ispreparing dinner.
Olivia is chopping up a freshsalad.
(15:15):
Her brother's coming in there.
He's got an attitude because hedon't want meatloaf.
He wanted steak, like he paysanybody's bills.
And apparently Gary don't payanybody's bills either because
he just got fired.
But Olivia knows how to handlehim.
She's like, okay, that's cute.
Go wash your hands.
We'll be eating in a minute.
Before we go any further, Abbydoesn't work, right?
(15:36):
And neither does Gary.
Why is this baby making dinner?
I'm gonna be Judgy Wudgy was amillennial for a second, only to
have the truth slap me in theface.
I have helped prepare dinnermany a times.
Not cook, but I definitely hadto set the table, you know, make
(15:56):
a fresh salad, blah blah blah.
There's nothing wrong with that.
There's nothing wrong with that.
However, if neither one of theadults in the home are working,
why is this baby preparingmeals?
Well, luckily, she gets the ickwhen her mom comes in from a
hard day of shopping for newplaces to live.
(16:19):
I'm very conflicted.
I'm very conflicted as I watchthis because although I don't
like that, I don't like what'shappening.
I can't deny that there might bea little more chemistry between
Gary and Abby than there wasGary and Valen, the Vidalia
Onion Queen.
Quite frankly, I think Vidalianeeds to spread her wing, so
this is this is all good.
However, I like Abby's housebetter than I like Valen's.
(16:45):
And you know what?
It would kind of suck to have tomove, but also they're obviously
Persona non grata in the in thecul de sac.
It's much too, it's just goingto make things awkward.
They're way too tight-knit, it'sway too close.
It's just going to make thingsawkward.
They need to find a place wherethey can thrive.
So I get it, but she's the oneout shopping for the house.
(17:07):
So I'm trying to figure outseveral things this episode.
Val is still living in the home,but without Gary having a job,
who's paying the light bills?
Who's doing all these things?
Doesn't matter.
Abby comes into the kitchen andshe's like, I'm so sorry.
It's so exhausting.
I've looked high and low, lowand high everywhere for a place
to live.
I just I don't know what else todo.
How's the job search?
(17:28):
Gary says, Well, Olivia said Ishould be a movie star because
I'm handsome and whatnot.
Olivia did say that it justpisses me off.
She's not wrong, but she iswrong, but she's also a child.
So it doesn't really matter.
But like then being him beingthe family man, I would I'm so
(17:49):
conflicted.
It should piss me off a littlebit more than it does.
I think I'm a little bitshocked.
That's what it is.
I'm shocked at how how easy itseems.
The entire family seems to haveslipped into this rhythm.
Uh, this is mommy, this isdaddy, this is a beautiful
little family of four.
(18:10):
He gets to play house, and I'mlike, shouldn't this be a little
bit jarring?
Shouldn't this be a little bituncomfortable?
Even for the kids, you wouldthink.
But I have to stop and rememberthat they're probably way more
used to him being there than theaudience is aware of.
Obviously, not you ogs, but assomeone watching it for the
(18:30):
first time, it does seem kind ofstrange.
This is only maybe the fourth orfifth time I've seen him with
the kids, really.
But they seem to have a wholething.
They are a family, the kids aregrossed out when the parents
start kissing and smooching oneach other.
And it's like it doesn't seemnatural, but it seems easy.
You know what I'm saying?
It seems too easy almost.
I don't really know what Abbyhas up her sleeve, other than
(18:52):
the fact that she does want tomarry Gary.
Apparently, she wants to be aYui.
I know this because right aboutthe time that the kids get the
ick and Gary and and Abby aresmooch-a doochin in the kitchen.
He ain't got no job, they ain'tgot no new house, but they're
just in love, and that's allthey need.
Phone rings, it's JR.
(19:12):
He's like, Can you meet metomorrow for lunch?
She pretends like it's hergirlfriend.
Hey girl, yeah, I can meet youfor lunch tomorrow.
Well, when she meets JR forlunch, he wants to know where
the rest of the chapters are,and also like, why would you
only send me these bits andpieces?
Abby says, I need to know what'sin that daggone will.
Gary told me that he feels likeJock really, really liked Valen.
(19:37):
So there's a very hugepossibility that his inheritance
is tied to Valen.
Again, JR does not seem all thatbothered by this because he
already knows.
So he's like, Okay, let me seewhat I can find out, and then
you know, you give me the restof the chapters.
So she does that.
Later on in the episode, shebrings over the missing
chapters, she presents them tohim, he's pouring the champagne,
(19:59):
and he just kind of laughs ather because he thinks she's
like, Well, where is the where'sthe will?
I don't have the will.
JR, how dare you?
He's like, Well, no, I mean,don't worry about it.
I don't have the will, but Idefinitely know what's in it.
Gary's about to come into awhole lot of money.
So she clinks the glass andshe's so happy.
But JR really wants to knowwhat's going on.
Okay, girl, you you're way toosmart.
(20:19):
And I feel really bad for Garyat this point because I don't
think he can handle you.
What exactly is it that youwant?
JR is thinking she wants to bequeen of the ewing.
She wants to go back to Dallasand run shop.
She's like, I want Gary, that'swhat I want.
So he tells this story aboutGary growing up.
When he was 16 years old, hewanted this motorcycle.
Let JR call it a motorcycle.
(20:41):
And Jock told Gary he wouldn'tjust buy it for him, like he
does everything else.
You're gonna have to earn it.
So Gary did.
He woke up early, he stayed uplate, whatever they asked him to
do, whether it was shucking cowdung or working on an oil rig.
He said rig, so I'm like, Ididn't think there was oil on
Ewing Land, but he definitelysaid rig.
Anyway, Gary gets to themotorcycle showroom floor and
(21:06):
promptly drives it through theglass window.
Now, you and I hearing thisstory, the moral of the story is
don't give a 16-year-old amotorcycle if he's never been on
one.
Maybe take it outside.
But to JR's point, he's tryingto say that, you know, Gary's
immature.
Gary will work really, reallyhard for something and then
he'll blow it all to bits andpieces.
(21:28):
Abby says, Ah, it takesdifferent people different time
to grow up.
So what?
So what he drove through a glasspane window.
It is what it is.
JR said, you know what?
Okay, cool, cool.
So let's let's let's do thisthen.
I need you to do something forme, and I'll do something for
you.
She says, Well, what do youwant?
(21:49):
I want you to keep Gary out ofDallas.
It's kind of a weird ask, right?
Abby says, What makes you thinkI would want to be in Dallas?
JR thinks that she wants to bequeen of the Ewings, like I said
earlier.
Come to Dallas, run shop,basically steal his thunder,
which doesn't seem like that wason anybody's radar.
(22:09):
JR says to her, Listen, you arenot Valen.
Valen managed to keep that manout of Dallas.
He didn't want anything to dowith Dallas when he was with
her.
I don't want that changing upall of a sudden when he's with
you.
I'll give you all the money,you'll get the jewels, you're
finna get all the things youneed.
Just keep your little narrowbehind out of North Texas.
She's like, done, dude.
(22:31):
I'm in LA.
Do you really think I'm gonna goto Dallas and do what exactly?
So he says, okay, cool.
So if I do, what do I get fromyou?
He says, My blessing.
It I don't know if anything wasinsinuated here, but I guess
time will tell.
I'm not even gonna ask thequestion, but just there's
something sitting in the back ofmy mind.
(22:53):
I hope I interpreted that theright way.
Doesn't really matter.
Abby knows she's about to comeup on some money.
So by the end of the episode,she tells Gary they're going to
some party.
Now, whose party?
I don't know, because neitherone of them have any friends.
They end up going to thisapartment, and it is butt naked.
So there's absolutely nothing inthere.
And she says, Listen, babe, Igot this for you.
(23:14):
I put a small deposit down.
Not just so you can get away.
I'm not pushing you out oranything, but you need a place
of your own.
Not only so you can avoidBaleen, but you know you might
want to get away from me fromtime to time.
She bought him a man cave.
He's grateful.
So grateful that he takes herinto the next room and takes her
down right there on the carpetfloor.
No bed, no nothing, no curtains.
(23:39):
I'm feeling more and moreneutral about the Gary Abby
situation.
It makes me roll my eyes, butalso I think I finally come to
the point where I've justaccepted it.
But I don't know, Abby, thatwell.
It seems out of character.
The thing I hated for Valen isthat Valen kind of got swallowed
(24:01):
into his identity, didn't reallydevelop one for herself.
She has the opportunity to dothat now.
Abby has her own identity, andshe seemed like she's way too
tough to lose that.
But girl, do you not see thatyou're kind of slipping into the
same sort of patterns that Valwas?
The same thing that you scoff atValen for being his mommy and
(24:22):
taking care of him in that way.
You're doing the same thing.
And maybe that's what JR wassort of pointing out.
Like, I mean, he's a big kid.
Gary's a big kid.
But Abby has also seen him asthe man.
That's all she knows.
So time will tell.
I don't think it's necessarilywrong that she found him an
apartment.
I just think I think it it will.
(24:46):
I think it's the first of a longline of things she's gonna have
to get used to doing for him.
It's interesting though.
I feel like with the personalitythat he's shown so far, having
somebody as tough as Abby mightjust work in his favor.
I don't know.
Uh I don't see him leaving her.
She's gonna have to get bored ofhim.
(25:08):
You know who's not bored?
Me?
Let's talk about KarenFarragate.
Karen Farragate is not boredbecause she is knee-deep into
all these transcripts, and it'sgonna get her in trouble.
Joe and Mac already had a littlediscussion about it.
Joe convinces Mac, like, yo, youshe's my you don't know my
(25:29):
sister.
My sister's a pit bull in askirt.
She's gonna keep going and goingand going until she finds
something, and then she's notgonna let it go.
Mac starts to consider this andand consider who it is she's
investigating.
If she keeps that energy up, herapproaching them, there's only
one way that's going to end, andthat's the last thing he wants
(25:49):
for her.
So one night Karen is hostingdinner, everybody but Gary and
Abby invited, and uh Max showsup, she starts flipping out on
him immediately.
You gotta respect it though.
It's like I respect people whoare themselves all day, every
day, 24 hours a day.
(26:09):
She doesn't mind that herfriends are there.
She starts flipping out becauseshe's figured out that the
dudes, the mafioso types, gotoff on a technicality.
She is furious, and she's moremad that Mac didn't tell her.
So he's trying to calm her down.
He's a little bit embarrassedbecause he hadn't really met
everybody like that.
Ginger and Laura are like, Oh,girl, he's fine.
(26:29):
Who is that?
Oh, he's fine.
And let me just say this they'renot lying.
Episode two has really done itfor me.
Y'all, Mac is fine, fine.
I I like I like what I see here.
Mag is hot.
It's it's more than just thejerry curl for me.
It's it's more than just the uhmedium outfits.
(26:55):
He's got swag.
He's gonna he's tough withoutbeing goofy.
I don't know.
He's hot.
I'm into it.
I'm into it a lot.
I hope he doesn't get shot likeI think you will.
Anyway, pop Mac is like, yo,Karen, calm the F down.
Joe says the same thing.
So they they managed to corralher into the kitchen, and Mac's
(27:16):
like, listen, I care about you.
I don't want you digging intothese people.
I'm sorry I didn't tell youevery single little piece of it.
I'm sorry.
Joe comes in and he's like,listen to her, listen to him,
please.
He's trying to help you.
I agree with him.
You need to calm the F down.
She's still going off.
She must sleep on it and come toher senses because the next day
she shows up at Mac's office andshe keeps kicking the door.
(27:37):
This man is very patient.
I would cuss you out if I'm atwork.
Don't kick my door six times.
But it's because she has like abox full of stuff.
She go, he goes to open thedoor, she comes in and she
basically apologizes for actinga fool the night previous and
says she's prepared to give himback the uh the transcripts.
He says, Well, if you want anymore, you're on your own, kiddo.
I just can't be doing this.
(27:59):
This is very dangerous.
She's like, I understand.
I'm not Michael Colleone.
I got caught up for a moment.
I thought I was in theGodfather.
I'm not.
I'm sorry.
I don't believe she's gonnastop.
There's just no way.
Maybe she won't go as hard,maybe she'll be a little more
stealthy, but there is zerochance on earth that Karen
Farragate is not gonna take thisto the ends of the earth to get
to the bottom of us to make surethat these men are held
(28:22):
accountable for what they did.
Now, Max's point is that thesesorts of guys, they never
they're not a one and done typecrew.
They're not gonna just run thisPonzi scheme or run this
whatever on this other side.
They're gonna keep doing thingseventually, they're gonna get
caught.
So he's basically telling her,let's play the long game, let's
(28:43):
let's just stack as muchevidence as possible against
them.
Eventually, we're gonna getthem.
I promise you, it's gonna happenbecause they're not gonna stop.
I love that.
Also, I love Joe still being thevoice of reason here.
He's like, girl, that's why wehave laws, that's why we have
people to enforce the laws.
Richard even told her the samething.
He's like, People like you andme, we don't get in bed with
(29:05):
these other types of guys.
We're we're a different breed ofpeople.
You cannot play the same rules,don't apply.
There's you can't just burstinto their operation going off
expecting that to end well foryou.
There are people put in place,i.e., Mac, who are who can
handle that.
SPEAKER_00 (29:23):
Let him do his job, trust him to do his job.
Speaking of jobs, Joe's got abrand new one.
SPEAKER_01 (29:38):
Part of it is being the new editor, the other part
is calming Valen Ewing down.
I already touched on this alittle bit.
She is not handling this newbook well, she is freaking the F
out.
On top of that, she's alsorearranging her house like she's
painted.
She got rid of all the otherfurniture that Gary's that was
Gary's or that it was Gary'smama's.
Got rid of that.
Her and Lily Mae are Rebuildingtheir life piece by piece.
(30:02):
So Joe explains that he'dexplained to JR earlier that the
publishing business isn't sogreat, and that I guess his
company was going to be sold.
Looks like they found a buyer,right?
I'm confusing this a little bit,but it doesn't really matter.
By the end, it doesn't matter.
The new owners of Joe andValen's publishing people
(30:25):
company, they're in town, andJoe wants Valen to meet them.
She's like, Oh my god, I can'tmeet dude.
No, please, no.
My house isn't ready.
I don't, I have like threepieces of furniture.
I am in no position to hostanything.
And I really don't feel likegoing to another party.
Last time I went to a party,found my man in bed with the
Hoochie next door.
Joe's like, relax.
(30:48):
They didn't actually say thatpart, but just think about it.
The last time she was promotingthis book, that's exactly what
happened.
I think she's past that.
She's just like, dude, I'm notin a position.
I'm so sick of this right now.
I can't do it.
Valen, just talk to thesepeople.
It'll only be them.
You can invite your neighborsover.
It'll be super sweet.
I couldn't help but notice thatwhen the new editor, the new
(31:10):
owners come over, it's a cutehusband and wife, older couple.
The wife is giddy because she'srun the she has read the book
front to back, back to fronttwice.
She loves it so much.
She wants the tea.
She's like, girl, is this aboutthe Ewings for real?
For real?
Please tell me this is true.
Valen is still pushing thatnarrative.
That it's not true.
It's it's fictionalized.
(31:31):
I made it all up.
But it doesn't matter.
There's a point where she is bythe fireplace and Joe is
standing right behind her.
He's like right up on her.
They look so good together.
I really, really hope that pansout.
They look so good together.
Joe's hot too, but I'm I'm kindof into Mac now.
(31:52):
Well, the they have a littleparty.
Everybody's there.
Like I said, I fell asleepearlier, so I didn't catch it.
But when I watch it again,somebody was reading pieces.
Let me rewind a little bit.
New owners are there.
They love Valen.
New owner's wife loves Valen'sbook.
(32:14):
Joe wants Valen to relax and seethat this is not going to be as
painful as she thinks it is.
Just talk to these people.
Boom, boom, boom.
New owner, older gentleman,pulls out the cover of Valen's
book, Capricorn Sun, not cornpwn or Capricorn Porn, as JR
called it.
The front cover is elementary atbest.
(32:34):
I don't know who did the art onthe front, but Valen's headshot
on the back is stunning.
They should put that on thefront.
It is so pretty.
But later on, we are blessedwith a small little chapter.
We get a little piece of thisliterary masterpiece.
(32:55):
Y'all, the book is so salacious.
It is so juicy.
Somebody is reading it out loud.
It took me two or three looks tofigure out that's Diana.
What happened to Diana's hair?
Lord.
Here's the thing, here's thething, here's the thing.
I like a short perm.
I just said that I love Maxhair.
I do.
(33:16):
I it it it transformed her in away that it's not bad.
I just don't think that look isfor her.
I didn't realize who that wasuntil I listened a few more
times.
I was like, oh my god, that'sDiana.
Girl, Diana reading the book outloud.
Like it's like it's Edgar AllanPoe or something.
(33:37):
Ginger is hot and bothered.
She's got her top buttonunfastened.
Kitty's probably looking fromher crossroom, like, oh yeah,
you know what's up.
Kitty, go warm up the car.
You know what's up.
Reading a rather smutty excerptfrom the book.
Max standing behind her.
He's grinning.
He's into it too.
(33:57):
He's smiling and what kind ofy'all.
This is not this isn't the sortof book you read out loud.
This is the sort of book thatyou you go to the dollar store,
right?
And you get one of those bookswith the slippery sleeves, and
you just put that over the smutyou're reading in the airport.
You don't need everybody knowingwhat you're reading.
(34:20):
Oh my gosh.
It it sounds like it's verysalacious.
It seems like a romance novel.
So I see what she's saying.
This is this is fictionalized.
It definitely reads like aDanielle Steele, from what I
heard.
From what I'm not gonna callDiana chickenhead.
That's so rude.
But I'm not into it.
I don't like Diana's new hair.
(34:40):
Hate it.
Hated it.
Among the neighbors at the partyis a very annoyed, very
irritated, very pregnant, verypast her due date pregnant type
Laura.
She's over this ish.
The long and short of it is thatshe doesn't want to have a
natural childbirth, andRichard's getting on her last
damn nerves talking about it.
It seems like he's being morepossessive, but the more I
(35:01):
watch, the more I realize he'sjust I don't know, he's kind of
hyper-fixated, and like he hasanything else to do.
He's reading all of thescenarios.
I guess a lawyer would be likethat.
He'd be very into the literatureabout childbirth and why natural
is so good.
Laura had stopped by the Knott'sLanding Motor one day to talk to
Karen, telling her that girl, Ineed my epideral.
(35:25):
I need to be doped up.
I'm not trying to have nonatural childbirth.
Karen's like, girl, it's sowonderful.
You should look at I don't Idon't agree with that.
It's so wonderful.
You should look into it.
It's it's so much more tochildbirth than pain.
Yeah, I get that.
To each their own, do you?
But also let people make theirown decisions.
(35:47):
It isn't like this is Laura'sfirst baby.
I I guess she would have beenknocked out the first time.
She's acting like she's neverexperienced labor.
Seems sort of impossible.
But Karen's like, girl, justdon't worry about the pain.
Ella's like, girl, no, it ain'tthe pain.
Do you know people die fromthis?
Do you know people actually diegiving birth?
Yeah, that is very true.
Very true.
Let her be comfortable.
I think she's just over it.
(36:08):
She's annoyed.
It's kind of everything iscompiling on itself.
So flashback to this littleparty Valen is hosting in her
house, her very scantlyfurniturized house.
Richard and the gang areoverlooking at the book cover.
Everybody's fawning over howgorgeous it is.
Laura is sitting very calmly onthe couch and she said, Richard,
we need to leave.
(36:29):
And he goes, Man, we can't leavenow.
Yes, we need to leave now.
He goes, Oh my god, are youhaving another contraction?
He seems to think they're stillBraxton Hicks.
Braxton Hicks aren't isn't thatat the beginning of the
pregnancy or like towards themiddle?
It wouldn't be at the end.
If she's a week over her duedate, she's probably having a
real contraction.
He doesn't seem to think that'sthe case.
She says, Okay, no, I'm nothaving a contraction.
(36:50):
My water just broke.
Her water just broke on a babyblue couch.
Oh my god, I just realized thatVal painted her whole house baby
blue.
Is that a what is that?
Yeah, well, uh Laura says thatshe she just her water just
broke on the baby blue couch,but later on, it's just Val and
(37:13):
um Joe, I think, Lily May andthe publishing couple.
When the phone rings, the dudetakes a phone call.
J.R.
Ewing, long story short, hasinvested in his company.
He's now the owner of it.
That new that uh publishingcompany is now under the
umbrella of Ewing Oil.
I don't know what that meansgoing forward because, like I
(37:35):
said, he doesn't seem all thatupset.
JR that is, he does not seem allthat upset about the book, and
more than anything, he seemsentertained, very unbothered.
So maybe he does want it to comeout.
I don't know.
And now with him being part ofthe publishing company, who's to
say he can't make changes rightthere at the end?
Who knows?
(37:56):
Maybe it'll never see the lightof day, maybe it will.
Doesn't seem like it'd be thatdifficult just to go to another
publishing company since there'salready buzz, but I don't know.
This is 1982, this is not 2025,I have no idea.
What I do know is that Laura andRidge are on their way to the
hospital when, of course,because it's nighttime, there's
obviously construction in themiddle of the road.
(38:18):
Everyone knows if you're on asoap opera, there's always going
to be night construction, sothey have to bust the Yui and
take a super secret alternateroute to the hospital down the
back roads.
Now I didn't know LA had backroads, but I mean, what do I
know?
They end up slipping and slidingon the road because it's wet.
Again, we're soap tack, soaptack, soap tacks.
(38:40):
Slam through a fence.
Oh my gosh, no, no, now we'restuck.
Laura's pissed.
Richard, fix the tire, take myass to the hospital.
He can.
He's like, I can't, I can'tchange it.
I'm stuck.
She ends up going into a morefrantic type of labor.
He he gets his hunter-gathereron and manages to find a single
(39:01):
lone orange and forces it downher throat so her throat doesn't
get dry from breathing.
She's still freaking out.
She's like, No, no, no, having akid hurts.
I'm not really trying to gothrough this pain.
My mama told me just to lay hereand let it pass.
Richard's like, it doesn'treally work like that.
I tend to agree with Richard.
So, meanwhile, back in Nant'sLanding, Karen has decided to go
(39:22):
over to Richard and Laura'shouse because Jason is getting
upset.
He hadn't heard from hisparents, and he was expecting a
phone call once they got to thehospital.
He's excited, he wants a babysister, and Karen's youngest
boy, Michael, is over there withhim.
But she she talks Mac intowalking over there with her to
hang out with the kids, and hedoes an amazing job.
(39:45):
He he tells Jason nothing tofret over, they're just busy
with the baby, and he's like,Your dad's probably pacing up
and down the hallway.
He does this whole little thing,and you could tell it puts Jason
at ease.
They faint on the couch, theyhave popcorn.
It makes him 10 times hotterthan I already think he is.
Yeah, I said it.
I said it.
It's true.
Jeez, Louise.
(40:06):
It's it's it's the confidencefor me, it's the swag.
He he seems to be in control.
He could have very well poppedoff at Karen.
I don't think he ever would, buthe's he's in control in a better
way.
Like he's not afraid to step toher.
He has no problem letting herknow what's going on.
She has no problem yelling backat him, she has no problem
yelling at anybody.
But to see him be so at easewith her family, I like it.
(40:30):
And I like that Joe likes him.
I like it all.
I'm not mad about this, this newcasting.
Okay, so eventually Laura has nochoice but to start pushing.
Richard has no choice but tostart coaching, but she is
fading fast.
The more she pushes, the moreshe starts having these really
invasive thoughts.
She starts remembering this girlwho died in high school.
(40:51):
She starts remembering how manywomen die at childbirth.
It just starts getting really,really more morbid.
Richard starts to get reallyworried.
He can tell that the baby'sheart rate is dropping.
He's like, Laura, please,please, please.
He's something's wrong.
You gotta push, please.
She does, it's like she refusesto push again.
Soap tax, soap tax, soap tax.
(41:12):
I'm not a gynecologist, but Ifeel like your body if something
wants to come out, it's gonnacome out.
It is much harder to keepsomething in than it is to push
it out.
So she's just talking verycasually, and he's like, Honey,
you're 99% there.
Please, you have to get themout.
So he screams at her, and she Iguess she mentally pushes.
(41:35):
I don't know.
She doesn't seem to bestraining.
Because oh, there he is.
Richard goes down to pick up ababy.
And maybe it's me.
Uh maybe everybody in the 80skept betting in their back seat
because the baby is quicklyswaddled.
Only he's not crying.
This is where I started to getnervous, and I'm like, Y'all,
(41:56):
please don't do this to meagain.
Can we not?
Can we not open every seasonwith something devastating?
Luckily, Richard, because he wasnerding out for the last six
months and he read every singlearticle and book, and he knows
all about anesthesia versus thespinal tap or whatever.
He knows about CPR and he knowsexactly how many baby breaths to
(42:20):
give his new baby.
And he puff puffs in the baby'smouth, puff, puff, pass, puff,
puff, pass.
Boom.
Lil baby starts crying.
Laura is immediately snapped outof her stupor.
Oh, I'm so sorry, baby.
I almost killed you.
I'm so sorry, my bad.
So then they gotta get down tothe business of naming the boy,
baby boy.
(42:40):
And he's like Alan.
And all I'm thinking is, okay,this is a millennial.
We can't, what kind of name Ithought his name would be like.
We already got a Michael,Jason's a very good name.
Justin, something like that, iswhat I was thinking.
Brian, well, we already got oneof those.
Dang, I'm just naming all thenames they got.
I just talked all that trashabout there only being so many
(43:00):
names in rotation up until 1930.
And I literally can't think ofvery many more boy names other
than Michael, Brian, Jason,Justin.
I'm trying to think of people Iwent to school with.
They end up going with Daniel,and I'm like, oh, I kind of
forgot that was the name of thisepisode.
So baby Daniel is healthy andwell, born in the backseat of a
Mercedes man.
(43:21):
That's a great burving story.
That is an incredible story.
I bet he still wants to hearthat every Christmas.
Not a bad episode.
I am really, really itching tosee.
I'm gonna actually go ahead andpush play on Dallas right after
this.
They're not syncing up.
This is all happening becausethis is my first time watching
it, but I'm really wondering howthat how that plays out.
(43:42):
And because this is so farahead.
You see what I mean?
Like this is 1982, Knott'sLanding.
Jock has already been deceased.
They already know this, they'realready to the point where
they're gonna read the will.
JR said they're gonna read it inabout a month.
But on Knott's Landing, I hadn'teven seen Ellie yet.
Excuse me, not on Knott'sLanding.
On Dallas, I hadn't even seenEllie yet.
(44:02):
So it can't be long, but we needto figure out what happened to
Kristen too.
So I'm gonna go ahead and wrapthis up.
I hope you guys enjoy this.
Thank you again for yourpatience.
Join me next time as we jumpback into another vintage prime
time soap opera episode ofExodus.
In the meantime, in betweentime, stay hydrated, stay
(44:23):
moisturized, mind your ownbusiness, and keep all of your
drama on TV.
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