The wine-soaked drama of Falcon Crest reaches new heights of delicious deception in Season 4, Episode 22, "A House Divided," where family loyalties are tested and mysterious newcomers harbor dangerous secrets.
Fresh from their Tahiti honeymoon, Cole and Melissa return to Falcon Crest only for their marital bliss to be tested by old insecurities about children. Meanwhile, Angela Channing demonstrates her masterful manipulation skills with pregnant Lorraine, making it painfully clear she cares only about securing another heir to the Falcon Crest dynasty. When Lorraine realizes she's merely a vessel for Angela's dynastic dreams, she stages a confrontation at lunch—though her choice to dump salad on a shrimp cocktail rather than execute the classic soap opera drink-throw leaves something to be desired in the drama department.
The episode delivers a thrilling surprise for viewers as we discover the mysterious advertising executive Cassandra Wilder and her brother Damon (played by Jonathan Frakes, who would later become famous as Commander Riker on Star Trek: The Next Generation) are harboring some connection to Angela's past involving a mysterious fire. Their scheming to use Richard as a way to get to Angela hints at a revenge plot simmering beneath the surface. When Angela finally comes face-to-face with Cassandra, she experiences an eerie sense of recognition, setting up what promises to be a shocking revelation.
Chase demonstrates his own strategic prowess by convincing Connie Giannini to embrace her family heritage rather than sell her vineyard to Angela, thereby thwarting his aunt's expansion plans. Meanwhile, Terry breaks free from Richard's manipulation when she realizes his possible involvement in framing Lance, though her independence doesn't extend to her romantic pursuits, as she continues pursuing the politically ambitious prosecutor despite his clear message that she's not "governor's wife material."
Have you noticed how Falcon Crest's storylines are growing increasingly bold and audacious this season? Share your thoughts about this episode and your predictions for the season finale by sending me a text or leaving a review!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
So once again I get to see all of his chesticles.
Let's keep Falcon Crest.
Come here, come here, come,come talk to me, come here.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, welcome, or welcome back
to SoClor, the officialgathering place for newbies,
novices and OG diehard fans ofthe golden age of primetime.
I'm your host, jess, stillviewing and previewing this.
(00:23):
Sophie is Stubbsiest primetimestoryline from 1985.
We are back on the West Coaststill doing the absolute most.
So, whether you're new to thisor new to this, sit back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or out of sight.
Tell them there's no questions,suggestions or concerns,
everyone else in earshot.
Be cool, be quiet or you willbe kicked out.
(00:44):
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is SoFloor.
Hello, gorgeous.
Welcome back to anotherfun-filled of snow floor.
(01:10):
I hope your day is shaping up,while mine is fantastic.
We are back on the west coastwatching a little bit of falcon
crafts.
I got a tiny bit of fan mailthat I want to read to you.
We discuss different seasons.
I hope I sound a little bitbetter.
I've actually been down.
I managed to catch a summercold.
Isn't that the most bizarrething?
(01:31):
Awfully frustrating.
I'm sure it's just allergiestrying to settle themselves.
But I thought you know what I'mfeeling.
Good, let me jump on this heremicrophone and let's talk about
this show because it is warmingup Falcon Crest.
I always know that they'regoing to turn out a wonderful
season.
They did something a little bitdifferent this season.
With it being so long, I thinkthis is the third or fourth
(01:54):
storyline.
I'm still expecting a bang bythe end, but this is a little
bit unprecedented for this show,as far as I can remember.
I fully expected this season tobe all about Indiana Chase and
the Vineyards of Doom, but thatstoryline has gone and went and
technically, if you look at theshows we watched today, they had
an entire next season withoutthat storyline.
(02:17):
Go ahead and grab yourselfsomething bubbly and bright as
we jump into season four,episode 22,.
As we jump into season four,episode 22 of Falcon Crest
called A House Divided.
Falcon Crest is not winning anypoints for originality when it
comes to these titles, but Ithink that's on trend for all of
these shows.
None of the titles are all thatexciting.
(02:38):
I guess they're like hey, doyou want a good storyline or do
you want a fancy schmancy title?
You right, you right, storylineor do you want a fancy schmancy
title?
You write, you write.
Okay, this piece of fan mailcomes from him in fresno.
I'm telling you, west coast.
I feel like most of the falconcrust fans are on the west coast
.
Now, before I read this, I'llhave to write her back to figure
(02:59):
out what episode she'sreferring to.
There's some generalities inhere and I do want to kind of
talk about her point, but I'massuming this is towards the end
of season two of Falcon Crest,maybe the early parts of season
three.
I'm not really sure.
Hi, jed, I just had to writeyou after listening to the last
episode because, yes, theAviator Adonis is an absolute
(03:23):
smoke show.
Now that could be any episode.
I think I say that a lot.
I used to have the biggestcrush on him.
That smirk, that swagger, hecould absolutely fly me anywhere
anytime.
Yes, kim, she goes as far asFalcon Crest goes.
I actually loved it frombeginning to end.
Sure, they shuffle the castaround a little bit, but that's
(03:46):
part of the charm.
The later seasons have theirown flavor and I think they
deserve more love.
I think this whole showdeserves more love.
Keep doing what you do, jet.
You're bringing back memoriesand making new ones every
episode.
Thank you so much, kim.
I really appreciate that and Ihave to agree with you.
First off, yes, robert Foxworthyis Foxworthy, he's gorgeous and
(04:10):
he's a phenomenal actor atleast on here I can tell too.
He's another one.
I think I've said this before.
He's definitely a thespian.
He's from the stage and theyjust they're a little bit
different on screen.
You can sort of tell.
It sort of jumps out at you alittle stronger than your
regular Hollywood actors.
It's just a little bitdifferent.
(04:30):
But when I I can't remember whatyear it probably was a couple
summers ago when I was recordingthe show, I was on Facebook a
little bit, had to be verycareful, still managed to not
get any spoilers.
But with the Falcon Crest groupgroup there seems to be two
distinct camps.
There's people who feel like itstopped being good around
(04:50):
season three.
Maybe there's three differentcamps.
People seem to think aroundseason three, some people say as
late as season six, it was fine.
And then there's people whowere like no, no, no, it was
perfect the whole way through,beginning to end.
I think that's par for thecourse, wouldn't you agree?
Any show that's going to have along run, sometimes they go
(05:11):
through those seasons wherethey're just not as interesting
as others.
But I'm thinking specificallynow of, like Walking Dead, if
that's your thing.
I hate gore, but I did end upwatching it, started watching it
probably around season four,and you know what.
Some seasons are more exciting,some seasons aren't.
But I really do think itdepends on when you start
(05:33):
watching something.
For instance, like me, I camein on season four.
I enjoyed it up until I stoppedwatching it.
Honestly, I didn't really thinka one season was better than
the other.
Well, you know, things can'talways stay the same.
Think, oh, one season wasbetter than the other.
Well, you know, things can'talways stay the same.
Sometimes things are excitingbecause they're new.
Sometimes things are lessexciting because the people you
like aren't there anymore.
(05:53):
That's just life.
I'm excited to watch this allthe way through.
We're on season four, we'realmost to the end.
I wouldn't say this season wasboring at all, not even a little
bit.
As a matter of fact, I wouldsay this across the board,
except Knott's Landing, becauseI think Knott's Landing's their
formula is a little bitdifferent, but they are upping
the ante.
I think the storylines aregetting more and more bold,
they're more audacious, they'reum, the jaw drops are a little
(06:17):
bit harder.
I think, all well.
Dallas Dynasty and Falcon Crestare just getting better and
better.
As far as Knott better as faras Knott's Landing goes.
Yeah, knott's Landing goes.
It's on season three.
I thought it was good from thebeginning, but it's a different
formula.
These are just people livingtheir everyday lives, so as
their lives change, things aregoing to get better.
But yeah, would I say seasonthree of Knott's Landing is
(06:41):
better than season one?
Yes, I would, but none of themsuck.
What's your opinion, guys?
You can send a text via the shownotes.
There is a little link ifyou're listening to this on your
mobile device.
There's a little link that sayssend us a text.
Or you can send me an email atsoflorpodcast at gmailcom that's
S-O-A-P-L-O-R-E-P-O-D-C-A-S-Tat gmailcom.
(07:07):
And I know a few of the otherplatforms, I think, like Deezer
and some of those.
Sometimes you can just leave acomment.
It just takes a while for me tosee it.
So if you do send me a text,I'll go.
I'll respond to you always, andif you were waiting on your fan
mail to be read, it will.
I just try to match them up nowa little bit better to the
episode.
So if you're a Dynasty fan, Iwant to read it on Dynasty.
(07:29):
If you're a Dallas fan, I wantto read it on that.
Or if you just have a generalstatement or some really
interesting tea, I tend to readthose just on any episode.
All right, y'all, let's goahead and jump into this one,
because your girl got a littlebit of a blast from the past.
A little surprise, we got a newhottie on falcon crest.
(07:49):
Season 4, episode 22 housedivided.
I think house divided is acommon title across all
platforms, so I'm pretty surethat's a play somewhere.
Per usual, we are going tostart with the bit players, and
on this episode we've got a few.
(08:11):
We're sliding into the end ofthe season, so of course
everyone is going to get alittle bit more screen time.
Seems like they're folding inon some of the stories just to
kind of get them out of the wayso they can focus on the bigger
ones.
But this storyline is what itis.
Melissa and Cole you know theyjust had that shotgun wedding
after he walked out of theirreal wedding.
Now they're in marital bliss.
They are chilling in Tahiti,eating fruit, rubbing oil all
(08:35):
over one another, deciding whatthey're going to do, which is a
whole lot of nothing, a wholelot of loving on each other,
smiling in each other's face,just being sickeningly sweet and
a little bit obnoxious.
So they take this love bubbleand they shout out to Teresa
Giudice.
They take this love bubble andthey push it out.
They go.
(08:55):
That does not sound good.
They go to a looks like a bar,just something off of the water.
You know, one of those littledives where you go in and you
eat the local fish, have a goodtime, drink beers or whatever,
and they're just.
You're so pretty, oh you're sopretty, oh, you're so gorgeous.
Melissa, I love you, oh, I loveyou too.
(09:16):
Cole, I like your skirt.
It's not a skirt, it's a Peru.
Oh, my goodness, we're sobeautiful.
Man at the bar is rolling hiseyes.
All he wanted to do was come inand have a good drunk.
Now he's got to listen to thesetwo fools.
So a little girl walks over tothe table she's holding, like
this basket of flowers, andshe's like hi, sir, would you
like to buy a flower for yourbeautiful lady?
(09:38):
I would have loved to have beena fly on the wall when this
child was auditioning for thisrole.
I know, like I know, like Iknow, she was in that bathroom
mirror at her house every nightreciting these four or five
lines.
She killed it Growing up a boomBaptist.
(10:00):
I used to have an Easter speech, baby.
I was the first one whomemorized it.
I couldn't wait.
Oh, and I felt that energy fromher.
Cole and Melissa are equally asimpressed, like, oh my gosh,
you're so sweet.
What is your name, little girl?
Cole asked her Sue, again,falcon cruz.
No originality points.
(10:20):
Sue Were girls named Sue in the1980s.
That feels like a 60s name.
Let me mind my business.
So Sue presents the assortmentof flowers to Cole and he's
rustling through and he says Sue, do you live in the village?
She says yes, my father is afisherman, as in yeah, I'm local
(10:42):
, my dad fishes, so yeah, I livehere.
She doesn't say hey, where areyou, two crazy kids from?
She don't say all that.
Cole says, well, you're awfullycute.
How would you like to come homewith us and be our little girl?
Gen x, millennials I don't knowabout z.
I feel like I've talked to kidsand my kids about stranger
(11:04):
danger.
They just don't seem thatinterested in people outside of
themselves.
So it doesn't seem to be as bigas a problem.
But when we were kids, strangerdanger, the man in the white
van.
You do not take candy fromstrangers.
You do not go in people'shouses, you don't know.
Okay, you walk everywhere in agroup.
You walk each other home.
(11:24):
That was in a group.
You walk each other home.
That was our whole thing.
You walk each other home.
We would plan our route so thatwe could, you know, like, say,
we were going to the park, you'dmake a big circle, everybody
had one person to walk with.
Let's say, like you lived on theoutskirts or you were a little
further out.
The group would, one by one,drop each other off because
you're walking in a group.
(11:45):
And when you the last twopeople got to the second, to
last person's home, their parentwould drive them back home,
like you did not go anywhere byyourself.
But then, at the same time, howmany places did we go by
ourselves?
It was such a weird time.
So me growing up, it was soweird because, yes, it was still
(12:06):
a weird time.
So me growing up, it was soweird because, yes, it was still
stranger danger.
We had been indoctrinated byour older siblings who would be
gen x.
Our parents were likeabsolutely not, don't go in
weirdos houses, stranger danger,walk with their group.
Even, like when I got older andwent to the club with friends,
you always went to the bathroomwith a friend, like, always walk
in pair.
But then at the same time, inthe same breath, we would go off
(12:30):
on weird adventures and nobodyknew where we were all the time.
Anyway, sue being a Gen Xer, herheckles are up and immediately
she ends this conversation,they're that's it, that's all,
or no money exchange.
Keep the flower.
She's, I'm out, bye.
Turns on her heel, she leaves.
I don't blame her, dude, didyou not hear her say that?
(12:51):
Not only is she local, shelives in the village and her
father ie, she's not an orphanis a fisherman.
I'm sure that's where she went.
To go to Some weirdo from the,from the states, it's like hey,
can I take you home?
Would you like to be our littlegirl?
Plus, sue is at least 10 yearsold.
She's going to be a teenager inno time flat, no, no, she does
(13:12):
not want to go home with randostrangers.
So where?
Um, sue is scared off, melissais pissed off.
When Cole turns around, she'slike oh you funny.
You funny, kendall, you gotjokes.
You want to rub it in my faceone more time that I can't have
(13:32):
any more kids.
You think you real cute?
That's real cute.
Cole is immediately like whoa,what happened?
She's like I heard you askingthat little girl.
What you trying to say?
You trying to say I can't haveno more kids.
You trying to say I'm a failurebecause I don't have a daughter
.
Is that your problem, cole?
You got a lot in there by thispoint.
This is a small, smallrestaurant.
She is making a scene.
Everybody's trying to look overtheir shoulder and try to keep
(13:52):
the peace, like they're noteavesdropping and wrestling.
I was like, oh my God, melissa,you're tripping.
You're going off like you'retripping mimosas.
Melissa's.
Probably all she's been eatingis fruit and drinking alcohol.
You know she needs some carbs,she needs some pasta, she needs
(14:12):
a brisket sandwich or somethingto soak up, something greasy.
But by this point she's alreadyrevved up.
I can't believe.
You said that in front of myface, cole.
You know I can't handle herbaby's cold.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is myartistic interpretation.
He's like you're tripping.
Do you want to go for a walk?
Hell, no, I don't want to gofor a walk.
Because why am I going to gofor a walk?
(14:32):
You're being irrational now.
Usually that word would set meoff.
But I mean he's not wrong, butshe's all I mean.
I get it.
He was wrong for asking Sue tobe their daughter when she has a
family Cause.
That's weird and you're a grownman.
You shouldn't say those thingsto children, especially little
girls.
But Melissa, you know she's.
She had a little bit too many.
She had a little bit too muchto drink.
(14:53):
Maybe she has some tequilasunrises and she's just like she
just needs a little pizza andmaybe a little bit of a nap and
she's gonna feel better.
So she goes back to their um, Iguess it's a hut, but it's like
a honeymoon suite.
I'm sure they're on a resort,I'm sure.
But she goes back and, uh, it'sraining outside.
(15:15):
It's raining cats and dogs andin walks.
Cole, he is completely soaked.
His little floral shirt issaturated with water, his hair
is plastered to his forehead,his peru is sopping wet and this
is his opportunity to come inand look.
Oh my gosh, I thought I'd get alittle sympathy for being
soaking wet in the rain.
(15:35):
And then he removes his top.
So once again I get to see allof his chesticles.
And let I'm to keep FalconCrest.
Come here, come here, come,come, talk to me, come here.
We can all agree that Cole isgood looking.
He is what is with the greasedown.
I come every time I see him.
He is shirtless and glistening.
(15:56):
Jesus, they're really trying tomake fetch happen.
I guess we're going to allow it.
Ladies and gentlemen of theaudience, I need you to remember
that Colesia Birdie is somewhatof a sex symbol, although I
would argue and this is comingfrom a straight woman I think
the thing that makes men sexy isit's a couple of different
(16:19):
things.
Number one, it is confidence.
You can be as untraditionallyattractive as you want to be.
You can be weird looking.
You can be two feet tall, youcan be nine feet tall.
If you are walking throughwhatever room, you walk through
with confidence, women are goingto be attracted to that.
Or, on the other hand, thetotal opposite of that is you
(16:43):
just being kind of a cool persondoing your own thing and maybe
you're kind of unaware of howhot you are.
That's even hotter, actually,but there is something about you
trying to be hot that makes youless hot.
It only and I repeat, it onlyworks on teenage girls.
So maybe they were feeding thataudience.
(17:04):
I'm thinking of super cheesy boyband moves from back in the day
.
Y'all know I love me some NSYNC.
So they were never.
They were never cheesy.
I will, I will, I will fightyou.
They were never cheesy.
But I think of groups whodidn't quite make it and it was
because they were a little too,you know, little geeky, pushing
up their nerves.
It just didn't work.
(17:25):
That's how I see Cole.
I'm not going to get into thisevery single episode.
I made it more than clear onmore than one occasion how
juvenile I find him to be.
But I will.
I'll fold for crying out loud.
Cole is a handsome man.
Do I enjoy seeing himglistening and shirtless?
(17:47):
It's just confusing at thispoint.
So no, okay, who's next?
Oh, I forgot a little bit.
I forgot a little bit.
So once Cole and Melissa sheenjoys his glistening body, they
make up, they make it back toFalcon Crest and of course,
maybe Joseph comes running inthe room.
It's adorable.
I can't believe he's four yearsold.
(18:07):
Let them tell it.
I I can't believe he's fouryears old.
Let them tell it.
I just can't believe it.
But I guess that math is nope,that math doesn't math, because
this show came out in 1982, doesnot math.
But that's so proper growing.
So, yes, I guess in warp speedhe needs to grow at least three
years a year.
Joseph comes in he's like yeah,margaret just dropped me off,
(18:29):
you guys have a good time.
And cole says, yeah, did youget bigger since the last time I
saw you?
Because, well, my muscles did.
Is baby joseph being a gym bro,not the the gym bro comment?
(18:54):
Of course you are.
Of course you've gotsupplements in the kitchen.
Of course you won't ever wantto look at your lats.
Of course you have a gym outfitthat is very on brand.
But you know, maybe he sees hisdad walking around glistening
all the time and he's like okay,I guess, I guess that's what I
got to be.
I could either be that or Icould be.
Oh, he don't really have achoice.
(19:15):
Now that I think about it, hisdaddy is all the way shirtless
all the time.
His extra fine grandpa loves aV-neck in the middle of 1980.
So yeah, I mean that's hisfuture.
I guess you got to start early.
It's a lot of pressure to comefrom that, especially now that
(19:38):
his dad feels like he's a sexsymbol.
But speaking of unabashed, rawsexiness by someone who
definitely knows it, cassandra,the new lady, is sitting on a
secret.
Now, for the record, I'm nottalking about Cassandra.
I'm sure she's gorgeous.
I don't find her sexy, I'm notreally into her, but she's
sitting on a little bit of asecret.
So just a quick little recap.
(19:59):
Cassandra Wilder has sent thisproposal to Richard.
She wants to advertise his newwine, or his new champagne,
francesca, all over the Valley.
She feels like she can reallydo something for his brand.
Now Richard is all into this.
Although he's new to the winebusiness, he's not new to making
money.
So he's like, yeah, let's goahead and get that, get that
(20:21):
locked in, start makingcommercials or whatever.
That's kind of what they agreeon this.
This episode they decidethey're going to go ahead and
move forward with theadvertising.
This episode they decidethey're going to go ahead and
move forward with theadvertising and because Richard
is one third owner of FalconCrest, he would like to do a
shoot right there on theproperty, which makes a lot of
sense.
He's probably saving a ton ofmoney.
The wine, although not producedthere, doesn't need to be.
(20:43):
We have this beautiful winehouse, we have the backdrop.
You want to imply that this is alegacy of winemaking.
I guess it's where he's comingfrom.
He doesn't have the heritagethat Chase and Angela do so by
presenting his wine, althoughit's a little more modern, this
(21:06):
is going to be boxed wine.
Let Angela tell it.
Although it's a little moremodern, this is going to be
boxed wine.
Let Angela tell it.
Chase called it lighter, fluid.
Although it's a new version ofan old thing, he still wants the
reputation.
He wants it to be reputable.
He also has a thing forCassandra, who is quite pretty.
Actually, I noticed Cassandrahad a person with her last time,
a dude.
I didn't really look at him.
(21:26):
This time I'm looking at.
So she's sitting on the couchand her partner I guess he would
be.
They don't really say what heis.
I don't know if he's hersecretary, I don't know what he
is, but his name is Damon Ross.
So Damon Ross is sitting by herand he's like hey, when are we
going to move forward with this?
This is taking too long.
When are we going to get ourhands on Angela?
(21:52):
Cassandra's like patience,patience, these things take time
.
How do you think our motherfeels Damien or Damon, he goes.
I know how she feels.
That's exactly why I want thisto move forward.
Immediately after this scene,cassandra is asleep in bed and
she's having a nightmare.
It is very Carrie-esque.
It is very they're all going tolaugh at you, that kind of
(22:13):
voice, and it's a little girl ina fire and she's like
surrounded by fire, she doesn'tknow where to run and someone
keeps saying Cassandra, but itsounds like they're all going to
laugh at you.
She ends up waking up, gaspingfor air.
(22:33):
She's like okay, so chrisandra.
Chrisandra has a brother nameddamon and there's something to
do with the fire and somethingto do with angela.
So they're using richard to getto angela.
Towards the end of the episode,the the whole photo shoot
magazine spread is happening atfalcon crest and angela's had a
very long date which we'll getto.
She comes storming in therelike hey, y'all wrap this ish up
(22:53):
.
I didn't get permission forthis.
Go and get your stuff and getout.
Richard doesn't make that muchof a fuzz, but he's like you do
know that I could be makingmoney for you too.
Also, I own one-third of this.
Just, I don't care what youdon't get out.
Cassandra introduces herselflike this.
Isning, we'd love to help youout as well.
Angela is old, she don't havetime for that.
(23:15):
I don't need help, little girl.
We already have an ad agency.
It's been working fine.
Cassandra's like well, I know,but we'd really like to give you
a chance.
Angela's like I'm not new tothis.
Like Richard, I am true to this.
I am this.
I am wine in the valley.
I don't need no help from thelights of you.
But the longer she's talking toher, it's like something sort of
(23:35):
tickling the back of her brain.
And Angela goes do I know you?
Cassandra says oh yeah, we metat Richard's place a few weeks
back.
She's like no, no, no, no, no,no, no, something about you is
very, very familiar.
Now, this was Damon's, herbrother.
This was his whole thing whenthey were on the couch.
He's like the longer this takes, she's bound to figure out
(23:58):
something.
So we need to move in on AngelaChanning as quickly as possible
.
But he starts to smirk and I'llbe damned if I'm not hit with an
instant wave of nostalgia.
I said oh, my goodness, didnobody tell me nothing?
I didn't recognize him becausehe didn't have the beard on and
he seems.
No, he's about as tall as Iremember him being.
When I saw that smirk, oh mygoodness, I said is that Riker?
(24:24):
Is that Riker from the USSEnterprise?
Is that Captain Jean-LucPicard's right-hand man, riker?
Although I'm not a tracking, mydad is, and in order to fill
time when I was given the timeto watch TV, sometimes I would
watch Star Trek because I didn'thave a choice.
Sometimes I'd just watch itwith my dad.
I'm like it was fine.
I didn't hate them, I didn'tmind the new one too bad because
(24:47):
of Riker.
Riker was fine, fine, fine.
Y'all google him right nowRiker from Star Trek, the new
generation on the USS Enterprise.
He was flying fine.
He had a beard.
Oh my god, you want to talkabout Chase being fine.
This man was fine, fine.
I had a crush on him when I wasa little girl.
(25:08):
I forgot about that, I forgotto have see until I saw him, and
you know crushes are prettyinnocent as it is.
I wasn't thinking very deeplyof it, but I do remember
thinking that's probably likethe first like man.
I was like whoa, becauseusually, like you, a crush.
I definitely had a crush onwhat's his name?
(25:32):
Go Home Roger.
Definitely Random boys on theshows I watch.
But, oh my gosh, I rememberthinking, hey, fine, fine, I
didn't mind sitting through anepisode because he would be on
there.
Well, I don't know what he andhis sister are up to on this
season, on this episode, butit's something to do with their
(25:53):
mom, something to do with a fireand the way Cassandra spoke
about their mom's, like how longhas our mother waited?
She didn't say how long did ourmother wait, which implies to
me that the mother is alive.
I'm here for it.
Speaking of mothers, connieGiannini's mother is dead.
We found that out the hard waywhen she showed up on time to a
(26:21):
meeting.
But she showed up post-mortem,so it was a moot point or so we
thought.
Chase and Maggie original,original.
Well, I guess it was chase'splan.
Maggie was just there forsupport.
Oh, pause, we got to talk aboutmaggie real quick.
So maggie is a bit player, nota bit player.
This episode where do I begin?
(26:42):
They're so intertwined.
At this point I like to do thebit players just because we
don't.
We don't really need to focusthat deeply on those, those
stories, because the other onesare so much bigger.
But she's woven into two ofthem this time.
So we, the audience, know thatRichard knows Lorraine is
pregnant.
We know that he kicked her out.
That's one side of it.
(27:04):
So the first time we see Maggiethis episode, she as she's at
the radio station station.
She goes into Lorraine's officeand she sees Lance.
Lance is packing all ofLorraine's things because
Lorraine has shown up nightprevious to Falcon Crest without
anywhere or where else to go.
So Maggie is listening to himlike oh my gosh, richard kicked
(27:26):
her out because she was pregnant.
That was crazy.
And Lance was like, yeah, can'tbelieve this fool.
So he's being a man.
Man, you know what I'm saying.
He doesn't want his woman to goup there and be all distressed,
especially if she's Prego.
So he decided to.
He volunteered to go get herstuff out of the office.
He was also secretly hopingthat Richard would run up and
get done up.
So Maggie's like this is socrazy, I can't believe he's
(27:47):
doing the most.
And, mind you, maggie has alwayskind of been on Lantha's side
as far as this whole murdertrial or attempted murder trial
is going.
She never thought it soundedright and she believed him from
the very beginning, like she wasa whole person who's like well,
he wouldn't have been able tohear this train if he had been
there, like she.
She has that in the back of hermind, but nobody's really
(28:08):
digging into that.
As far as we know, they're notreally doing anything other than
talking about the trial at thispoint.
So she's standing at the deskwith Lance and she's like hey,
what about that McCarthy guy?
Has anybody seen him?
Do you think there's a goodchance that maybe he could just
show up out of the blue andstart talking to people?
Okay, I don't know what's goingon with the writers.
(28:28):
This episode that's a little.
That's a little on the nose.
And she says his name for therecord no less than 10 times
this episode.
So we should fully expect to seeflorida man, joel mccarthy,
show back up and lindsay's likewell, you know I hated joel
mccarthy, but a lot of peoplehated joel mccarthy.
I didn't do anything with JoelMcCarvey.
(28:48):
Do you think Joel McCarvey willshow back up?
Maggie's like I wonder whereJoel McCarvey is.
Hmm, okay, richard comes in andtells Lance to get his ish and
get out, and Lance was like no,let him let.
Okay, what if I don't?
And he walks up to him.
Maggie goes over to break upthe non-existent squabble.
Richard is too rich to fight,unless he's punching out old
(29:12):
ladies.
He says Lance, unless you wantto be on trial for two attempted
murders, I suggest you leave.
Lance is like man, I do nothingbut karate all day.
You don't want this rich.
So Maggie, I guess, goes by tovisit her sister, aunt Terry,
(29:33):
and Aunt Terry is trying on thequintessential 80s elf dress.
It is a sweetheart necklinemade of gold lame with a black
skirt.
She tries it on and she's likedang, I should have got this
even tighter.
This is doing nothing for mybody.
Maggie's like that's great.
Speaking of bodies.
Where's the body of JoelMcCarthy?
Where's your ex?
I ain't seen him in a long timeNow.
(29:55):
She didn't say ex, pardon me,she's well.
She says something like that,but ex the way you and I the
audience know that that isTerry's actual ex-husband is not
what Maggie means.
She knows that they were datingand that they were going to get
married.
Terry immediately clams up.
She's like I don't know, goodriddance.
(30:15):
Maggie's like why don't youever talk about him Like what
really went down with him?
I feel like there's somethinggoing on with this whole Lance
thing in him.
Terry also, don't give a damnabout Lance because he's played
her before too.
Remember, he left her forLorraine.
So she like whatever Lance gets, lance got coming wherever.
Joel is good riddance.
He shouldn't have left me highand dry.
Maggie's like girl, you'reacting funny, funny.
(30:37):
Terry goes that was below thebelt.
Maggie's like precisely that'swhere I was aiming, I don't miss
.
Terry says you would never havesaid that if you were my real
sister.
Maggie's like touche, I'm reallyglad you and I share zero DNA,
lest I too be a whore.
She didn't say that, it'simplied by me.
(30:59):
So, maggie, she's just kind ofstone-faced.
She like touche, if you decideto stop lying and talk to me
about Florida, man holler atyour girl, I'm going to leave.
So she leaves and Terry isstuck in this Golden May dress.
Well, there's something aboutthat conversation that starts to
(31:20):
sit with her.
She's like hmm, so she takesoff the Golden May, which she
wants to use to seduce themanimal, by the way, and I'm
thinking she's still on.
Used to seduce the manimal, bythe way, and I'm thinking she's
still on.
She's still working for richard.
She goes to visit richarddressed like a widow and, uh, he
wants to know the latest on oncraig rudin.
(31:40):
Craig, I know I've been callinghim craig.
His name is the manimal.
What's going on with themanimal?
Terry says, uh, I don't know.
He's working on trial stuff andhe doesn't really want to talk
about it with me.
So I mean, he's working ontrial stuff.
Richard says I ain't not payingyou to seduce and produce.
You've done neither today, so Ihave to deduce that you don't
(32:03):
want my money.
Matter of fact, I think youwant Flory man back in town.
And Terry said you know what,richard, I had a conversation, I
talked to myself and I said,self, why on earth was richard
so gung-ho to help you?
And myself said now, I don'tknow, terry, what you think.
I said self, I think I recallright about the time that coke
(32:28):
themed florida man disappeared.
He was running his mouth aboutall this money he had come into.
Remember he came in.
He had on the Usher sweater, helooked like Michael B Jordan,
he had a fresh mullet.
And myself say, yes, self, hedid.
Now, you're right, he did comeout.
He was fresh to death, helooked amazing.
Matter of fact, I think he wason the come up Me myself.
(32:49):
And I agree.
So, richard, I say, instead ofproducing and seducing, I deduce
myself that perhaps you had ahand in this whole Lance Cumpson
setup.
I deduce that if I produce amen, joel, you would be more
(33:09):
inconvenienced than myself.
That's what I think.
Richard squirms in his seat,swirls his milk in his glass and
he's like huh, quite the gamble, terry.
You sure you want to do that?
She's like you know what.
I'll take my chances.
By the way, I quit in not somany words and I'm out.
She gets up and she leaves.
The way I quit in not so manywords and I'm out.
(33:32):
She gets up and she leaves.
Now I'm thinking oh good, terry, your spine is intact.
It is stiffer than it was whenyou walked in.
I certainly hope you were donewith this whole seducing for
money thing.
She is done with the money part,but for some reason she still
wants the manimal.
So she, this girl, loves to getdressed and go over to be
embarrassed.
She gets dressed, she goes overto the manimal's farm, where he
(33:52):
is of course running aroundwith the horses and whatnot, and
she's like hey, why don't we goon a date?
He's like I've been told youI'm very busy.
I can't accommodate that rightnow.
I got a lot on my mind.
She goes okay.
Well then, after the trial, whydon't we hang out?
Why don't we go out?
He's like nah, nah, nah, afterthe trial I'm going to be the
(34:13):
governor of California.
She's like the governor ofCalifornia, how you figure?
Well, this is my politicalcareer, this is what I'm working
on.
This is a high profile case,all the chips are in place.
It's going to be wonderful forme and unfortunately, terry, I
can't be seen with you.
I was just like, oh, okay, okay, okay, I see what it is.
I'm good enough to roll aroundin bed with, but I'm not good
(34:35):
enough to be on the arm of thegovernor of California.
And he's like the governor ofCalifornia can't have a hoe as a
housewife, even if said hoe isindeed a housewife.
But that doesn't matter.
Terry is not deterred, she's notdeterred, she's going to
produce, she's going to seduce.
So by episode's end, she drivesto his house at night, or
(34:57):
actually, she doesn't drive.
She has a driver because she'sa wealthy housewife.
Okay, she drives to his housein a slightly too small for her
frame veiling car.
Allow me to explain.
I'm a tall woman and there arejust certain cars I'm not going
to get into If it is a like a 97Mustang, you know, like a coupe
(35:18):
.
The backseat is not meant forme.
I cannot ride around with myknees up to my chest.
It seems like Terry is not thattall, but perhaps those cars of
ago, this is probably like a1930, 1940s car, it's just is
not meant for what she's workingwith.
So she pulls up to the stables,where Reardon is brushing horse
(35:43):
booty all night, I suppose, andhe sees her and he's like Terry.
I'm really really busy, but shehas to like.
She's in the back seat so shehas to turn and duck her head
out of the window.
But it looks like somethinghappened to her neck.
It is not an attractive ankleand now that I'm saying it is
probably because she has an updo, not so much her height.
(36:04):
But you know, you have to thinkabout these things.
You can't get into a car withtoo tall hair unless there's a
lot of head room.
Wonder how my beehive sistersdid back in the day.
That's crazy now that I thinkabout it.
Maybe they took it off untilthey got where they needed to go
.
Anyway, she's got her neck alltwisted and she's seducing him.
Hey, come over here.
And he's like I'm really notinto it when she goes.
(36:31):
Oh, but I think you are.
She's got on the goal of May.
He's like Terry, I'm reallybusy.
I got horse ponytails to brushall night.
I got depositions to write.
I am quite booked and busy,ma'am.
Well, she's not hearing that.
She opens the door to hervintage villain, silver Bullet,
and she shows him a little leg.
He's like y'all's are y'all'sare gams Girl.
She got on, throws him a littleleg and he's like y'all's a
(36:56):
y'all's a gams Girl.
She got on Girl or gentleman.
She has on regular dagglerpantyhose.
I'm not talking about her legs,like, okay, cool Legs are going
to seduce him.
But tell me why she has onthese tired gold faux chain like
old lady sandals.
That's what gets Griggin goingA good, old fashioned pair of
old lady sandals.
That's what gets green going agood, old-fashioned pair of old
lady sandals.
Which makes me wonder why heain't trying to get with Angela.
I know old lady shoes.
(37:20):
Okay, trust me.
Well, anyway, that works.
He gets in the car and sheallegedly starts taking off his
boots.
Boots will take so long to takeoff.
But whatever, terry and themanimal, we're gonna move on
because I have nothing else tosay about that.
All right, the aviator adonishas had a couple of things to
say.
It's been on his mind.
(37:41):
He does not want the gianniniproperty, but he does not want
angela to have the gianniniproperty.
So what does he do?
He waits till it's dark, hedrives or walks over to Connie's
home.
Connie is Mary's daughter, theGiannini lady, and Connie is, I
guess, she's just trying to getthings in order.
(38:01):
Maybe Reidman left a couplethings behind, or her parents
had a few things in the homethat were left behind when
Reidman took over.
I'm not really sure, but thehouse is filled with boxes
nonetheless.
Chase comes over and he'schatting with Connie and he
pulls the most auntie move I'veseen this season.
He does that whole.
(38:22):
Well, baby, how come you don'tever come see me?
You don't ever come visit?
You don't call, you don't write, only uh, the wine country
version of that.
Well, Connie, you know yourparents worked so hard.
This is a fine bottle of wine.
Look what your daddy them made.
Man, this is beautiful.
Number one.
I struggled too, you know.
I just couldn't stay in NewYork because my heritage was
(38:44):
calling me.
I had to come back here becausethe land wanted me.
Chase, don't do me.
That is not at all why y'allcame back.
I recall distinctly on seasonone.
The only reason they came backis because their daughter, vicky
, who has been ousted.
We ain't seen Vicky in twoseasons.
Vicky was having an affair withher 36-year-old teacher when
she was a 17-year-old and Colewent and beat him up, went to
(39:10):
jail and behind beating apedophile.
That's why y'all moved to NewYork, you and Maggie, maggie,
maggie, you and Maggie werenegligent parents with kids
running amok and you had to dosomething.
So you went all the way to theother coast because your daddy
would set a flame and set overthe side of a mountain.
Talking about heritage, I guessthat's heritage if you just
focus on the dad part.
Well, he starts talking.
(39:40):
Connie's like okay, I hear you,but, chase, I make champagne.
I don't know how to make wine.
He goes well, listen, I can't,I don't worry about that.
This is your birthright, thisis your heritage, this is your
mom and your daddy.
They work so hard for this.
So by the end of theconversation, connie's like well
, yeah, I guess.
I mean, I don't hate it here, Idon't see why not.
I don't think it'd be that bigof a difference to make
champagne from wine.
Let's do it, chase.
(40:00):
So a little later on Chase andMaggie come over and they have
dinner with her on the floor.
They have a picnic on the floor, surrounded by back boxes,
drinking wine.
Now, usually I've seen this inmovies, in film, as a romantic
thing.
I've moved in several times todifferent places.
Um, never had wine and pizza,probably had like beard pizza
(40:22):
when I was younger.
And if there's whatever it is,I don't know it was not a
romantic scene, but I noticedthat scene is also put is
usually put out to be romantic.
It is at this moment that Inotice maggie, the actress, the
lady who plays her.
I know it's something says init.
So la la la sullivan is apretty good actress, but on this
(40:43):
show you can't give her toomuch time to talk because she's
just gonna start rambling.
I can tell she's not reallyreading the script because she's
just going to start rambling.
I can tell she's not reallyreading the script.
Maybe she doesn't memorize itand she just kind of feeds off
of other people.
It doesn't sound bad, but don'tlet Maggie get to talking.
Or perhaps she's been borrowingsome of Emma's meds, because
Emma was on one this episode.
(41:04):
She was tripping, she was goinga little.
Lulu, this little kookaloo.
This episode they end upclinking at glasses.
They're gonna help her.
That's the discussion now.
We don't know everything thereis to know about wine, but we
were kind of coming in like youwere, like we were grown where
chase grew up in it.
Maggie learned it alongside ofhim.
(41:25):
So they're like hey, connie,don't even worry.
What you don't know you canlearn.
You probably know more than youthink because you grew up here.
But we're going to make sureeverything is right and good.
Angela Permrod Goddess is havingquite the week.
At the top of the show.
Lorraine shows up with nowhereto go.
She's like Richard kicked meout because I'm pregnant with
(41:49):
Lance's baby.
Angela knew this, becauseAngela found out she was
pregnant and promptly toldRichard, knowing he'd do just
that.
So she says don't worry aboutit, charlie and I will get a
room ready for you.
You can stay upstairs.
By this point Lance isdownstairs and he's like well,
you can sleep in my room.
Oh, no, she can't.
(42:11):
There will be no fornicating,no fornification in Angela
Channing's home.
Absolutely not.
This young lady will stayacross the hall.
You can come see her in themorning at breakfast.
Well, of course that doesn'tfly.
Lorraine sleeps prettypeacefully that night and the
next morning Lance comesslinking into her room and
(42:32):
crawling into bed with her.
Now I guess things might haveescalated if Emma understood
what a closed door meant.
Mind you, emma is only awarethat there is a guest in the
home.
Do you know?
She don't knock.
She must have used her feet tokick in the door, because she
comes waltzing in with some eggs, talking about hey, I heard we
(42:53):
had company.
I brought you some eggsbenedict, it's going to be
delicious.
Now Lorraine is like oh my gosh, get that out of here.
That smell is horrible.
She's pregnant, y'all.
She's not being rude, she'spregnant.
And Emma's like oh my gosh,gosh, are you pregnant?
By this point they have wokenup.
Perm, rock, goddess.
She had to take out her rollersand fluff her hair real quick.
She came in there.
Yeah, she's pregnant.
(43:14):
I know what he knows.
Now, you know it.
Everybody knows this littlegirl was pregnant.
Lance, what are you doing here?
Came to check on her thismorning.
Lance's trial is not lookinggood.
By the way, let me just throwthis in Angela and Riordan were
doing sort of I guess not a mocktrial, what would you call it?
They were just questioning him,basically rattling off
questions that the defense mightuse to trap him, and he is just
(43:39):
really sucking at answeringthese questions To the point
where Angela's like now, damnman, come on now, just don't say
nothing dumb, that's all.
Come on now, just don't saynothing dumb, that's all you
have to do is don't say nothingstupid.
Craig Reardon says okay, lance,now do you have a good
relationship with yourgrandmother?
Yes, I love my grandmother.
I would never harm her.
(44:00):
If I did, who would make mycookies?
Still, you're going to bemaking cookies in the clink if
you don't get your life together.
Do you want to go to jail?
Anyway, back to that morning.
Angela barks out that everybodyknows she's pregnant.
Let's all stop pretending wedon't know.
So Emma's like oh, that'sexciting.
And then she thinks about it.
She goes wait, lance, is thisyour baby, though this time?
(44:29):
And Angela goes of course it'shis baby.
Emma goes well, dang, I don'tknow.
Lorraine, if I was you, Iwouldn't, don't let, don't let
my mama get her hands on him,because she'll sell him.
She sold joseph one time, ohgosh.
So a little later on, emma andangie take lorraine on a
shopping lunch.
Now I don't know if this is areal thing.
I choose to believe it is.
(44:49):
I choose to believe the upperechelon shop this way.
They're having dinner at orlunch, pardon me, at this
restaurant and there's thiswoman just kind of elegantly
walking around in this reallybeautiful gown, got a little fur
shawl on she's walking andspinning.
At first I thought she was ahostess.
Shawl on she's walking andspinning.
(45:10):
At first I thought she was ahostess, but like they're
looking at her in a way youwouldn't pay attention to a
hostess, if that makes sense.
Angela says Lorraine, what doyou think about that dress?
Oh, it's gorgeous.
So Angela calls a woman over andshe says ma'am, could you go
find something else to wear?
We're going to take that dress.
And Lorraine goes no, no, no,please don't.
I'm preggo.
I'm not going to be able towear that in a month.
(45:31):
Don't even bother.
The model ain't trying to hearthat.
She's got a sales quota to me.
She goes well, we have it alsoin lavender.
Why that?
I don't understand what thathas to do with the fit.
But okay, rich, she's like okay, we'll take both of them.
Lorraine is just oh my gosh,that's so sweet.
I can't believe you're doingthis for me.
(45:52):
Angie goes, no worries, you'refamily now.
So what do you think aboutyellow for the nursery?
Lorraine goes nursery becauseshe's thinking her and Lance are
moving out.
Obviously I also thought tomyself didn't Joseph already
have a nursery?
But the way they're talking.
Emma says that they're going totake the, the vintage bed, out
of Julia's old room and turnthat into a nursery anyway.
(46:16):
Lorraine is like no, lance andI are going to have our own home
.
Don't do that.
Emma says absolutely not.
We have to have a special placefor the air.
And then it hits, hits Lorraine.
Oh my gosh, is this why you'rebeing nice to me?
You're buying me dresses andlunch because I have Lance's
baby, the heir to the FalconCrest throne.
(46:36):
Her acting is abysmal.
This episode, it is horrible.
Her and Lance's acting is not.
It's horrible when they'retogether, but hers is especially
heinous.
Angie goes gosh you.
Hers is especially heinous.
Angie goes gosh.
You're brighter than I thought.
Obviously, lorraine is new tothis.
She is not true to this.
She is not a soap operaaficionado, she is not a soap
(46:57):
queen.
I'm thinking this is probablyone of her first few acting gigs
.
She goes off on Angela mildlyand then, instead of splashing
this woman in the face with adrink.
She picks up a wedge salad anddumps it right over top Angela's
shrimp cocktail.
Now, if you're hungry you canstill eat that, right, no damage
(47:23):
done.
I needed to duck points,lorraine.
What the heck was that?
You can at least spillsomething?
You have to make itinconvenient if you're in a
restaurant and if you'relistening to me, I have to
believe you were a little bitdramatic.
If you were at a restaurant andyou want to make a scene.
Let's say you're in a soapopera and you just found out
that you are a pawn in someoneelse's scheme and you're hurt
(47:45):
because they're not taking yourlove serious and the bastard
that you hold in your stomach.
You got a glass of water, aglass of wine, ranch dressing
and a salad.
What do you toss?
It's the first three, obviously.
The third one is diabolical.
I wouldn't do that.
I feel like I would get introuble.
But at least splash a littlewater on the table.
(48:07):
At least knock over a glass.
No, she awkwardly picks up thesalad and sprinkles it over her
shrimp cocktail.
I'm going to eat both of thesenow, thanks, but Angela liked it
.
She's like all right.
All right, I see you, lorraine.
Lorraine got a little horked.
So after a few more days of allof Angela's rules, which are
(48:28):
basically do not fornicateoutside my house, y'all not
gonna be sleeping with eachother.
I don't want any extra childrenaround here.
Lorraine's not doing well.
Lorraine's being kind of a brat.
She pops off at Emma fornothing.
Then she ends up going over toRichard.
She's like Richard, I cannotlive there anymore, please don't
do this to me.
And he goes you don't live here, you're gone to me.
I don't do this to me and hegoes you don't live here, you're
gone to me.
(48:48):
I don't know who you areanymore.
She does to him when she well,she shouldn't have slapped
Angela.
I don't think she should haveslapped Angela, but she does end
up slapping Richard across hisface and he doesn't cry, but he
almost cries.
Now Rebecca Lynch had alreadytalked to him at the top of the
episode when she found a crushedpicture of Lorraine, or she
(49:11):
when she found a picture ofLorraine in the trash.
She's like dude, this is yourfamily.
Please stop being an idiot, donot push this girl away.
She's having a baby.
The, the daughter that you love, is having a baby.
Like basically saying you'retrying to tell me you don't love
her.
You're not going to love herkid too, because I don't have a
(49:31):
daughter.
That's my stepdaughter, and tohell with her.
She wants to go live in thatlittle cheap, drafty mansion.
Then that's her business.
But after the slap I think hisheart really broke.
Oh my gosh, I can't believe it.
But as she slapped before sheslaps him broke like oh my gosh,
I can't believe it.
But as she slapped before sheslaps them, you were disowning
(49:53):
me because I am having thebastard child of lance cumson.
Why would you in in casualconversation?
When do you ever use someone'sfull government name?
Ever?
Unfortunately, she doesn't havea choice at this point.
She has to remain at themansion, at least until the
trial is over.
So back at the mansion.
It finally comes around toAngela that the land she thought
(50:16):
she was going to be purchasingfrom Connie Giannini is no
longer for sale.
Tell me why.
She finds out that her nephewhad his grubby little hands in
this too.
So she's super pissed.
She gets in the supervillain car.
She has Charlie drive her downthe road to the little mansion,
the little castle.
She knocks on the door, chaseopens it and he knows it's her.
(50:40):
So he's smiling all day andhe's like hi, angie, she's all
hee, hee, hell.
I can't believe you, chase, youthink you're real cute, don't
you, chase?
You think you're real cute,don't you?
You think you're real cute?
I would slap that smile rightoff your face.
He's like well, auntie,whatever are you talking about?
You don't know what I'm talkingabout.
Chase, you wouldn't talk connieinto not selling her land.
(51:01):
All of a sudden she wants tostart living there again.
I can't believe you.
Now, unbeknownst to angelabecause she's going off so hard,
she doesn't realize that Connieis right there in the room.
She says Chase, what did yousay?
I demand to know.
What did you tell that girl tomake her change her mind?
He goes why don't you ask heryourself?
So Angela looks over to herleft and she sees Maggie and
(51:23):
Connie.
So well, well, well, if it isthe co-conspirators, what do we
have here?
What y'all talking about?
How to fumble a bag, how toburn grapes, how to turn wine to
jelly, because y'all damn sureain't going to make no money.
So by the show's end, angelajust has to deal with it.
There's really nothing she cando at this juncture, but I'm
(51:44):
sure she's working up anotherscheme juncture, but I'm sure
she's working up another scheme.
But at the last scene what wefind out when everybody is down
at dinner at Falcon Crest isthat Lance and Lorraine, of
course, have plans to move.
They're just kind of waiting onthis.
They wanted an extension forthe trial.
I don't remember this beingpart of the storyline before,
(52:04):
but maybe it was.
I just wasn't paying that muchattention.
They need an extension and theywant the trial moved out of the
valley so that Lance can have abetter shot.
Tell me why everybody's lookinglike just you know, somebody
died that day.
They look so depressing andcold.
(52:30):
Lance is like what's going totrial on Monday End scene.
I laughed throughout this entireepisode.
It was highly entertaining.
Angela's little whips are asspicy as Alexis's now.
I like this.
Somebody's doing their homework, somebody is competing in real
(52:51):
time and I love it.
And I don't think it betraysthe storyline on Falcon Crest at
all, although I will say thistrial seems like a joke at this
point.
You can't.
Attempted driving recklessly isnot the same thing as attempted
murder.
It's her word against whomeverwas driving.
And if Lance says he wasn'tdriving, then he wasn't driving.
I mean, it's flimsy at best.
(53:12):
Even if he was, this just don'tseem like you would go to
prison for attempted murders Alittle bit over the top, if you
ask me.
But quite frankly, I can't waitto get back to this because I
really, really, really want toknow what Cassandra and Riker
are going to do.
I want to know who their mamais and what that has to do with
(53:33):
anything going on at FalconCrest.
Plus, angela's, like you, seemfamiliar, so I'm trying to
figure out what that is.
God, I love a soap opera, whoknows?
Oh, last but not least, this isthe part I forgot Melissa.
When she and Cole got back fromTahiti, and right before baby
(53:55):
Joseph got there, melissa wasgoing through their mail that
they had missed while they weregone and there was a letter from
her cousin.
Her cousin is coming to visitas soon as school's out.
She's going to come on hersummer break.
It's going to be so much fun.
Cole says I don't remember yourcousin.
Well, cole didn't grow up there.
Melissa's like oh no, this ismy cousin.
(54:15):
She moved about six years ago.
I don't know if she said shemoved to Tuscany or from Tuscany
Valley.
She didn't really say the wordValley, so I'm not sure, but
yeah, we got a new charactercoming.
She and melissa were thick asthieves back in the day.
So do y'all want to take a bet?
Oh geez, obviously you mightknow.
You.
Maybe this is an insignificantstoryline, you don't remember,
(54:36):
but I want to wager a bet.
I think melissa's new cousin hmm, let's see.
Do we think she's going to be agood girl or a bad girl?
I think we.
Terry is probably stillclassified not to be, but
classified in the story as thequote unquote bad girl.
Mellie's a bad girl.
(54:57):
I think her cousin will bemischievous or she'll be sweet
and innocent.
Now, who's going to sink theirfangs into her?
I don't think it'll be Cole.
I don't think it'll be Chase.
We need some more men on here.
Is this another trianglebetween the manimal and Terry
and whoever?
Or Lance?
(55:18):
Ooh, that could be good.
Okay, lance is either going tofall for her or she's going to.
She's going to throw a wrenchin there somehow.
We all know cousins and familymembers saying with me are never
a good thing.
On a soap opera, never.
There's very few exceptions onthis show.
Cousin Michael turned out to beI.
(55:39):
Francesca wasn't bad, but shestill.
She broke up Richard and hissecretary.
So do with that what you will,and his secretary, so do with
that what you will.
All right, guys?
Thank you so much for joiningme today.
Don't forget you can send me atext, you can send an email or
(56:00):
you can leave a review.
Join me next time as we jumpback in for some more Soap Opera
debauchery.
In the meantime, in betweentime, if you were at a luncheon
and things get heated, take onelast swig of your water and then
flick the wrist and splash themto the person's face.
Or, at the very least, stand up, throw your cloth napkin down
(56:21):
and twirl on your heels and makea dramatic.
Whatever you're going to do,stay hydrated, stay moisturized,
mind your own business and keepall of your drama on TV.
Bye.
So once again I get to see all of his chesticles.
Let's keep Falcon Crest.
Come here, come here, come,come talk to me, come here.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, welcome, or welcome back
to SoClor, the officialgathering place for newbies,
novices and OG diehard fans ofthe golden age of primetime.
I'm your host, jess, stillviewing and previewing this.
(00:23):
Sophie is Stubbsiest primetimestoryline from 1985.
We are back on the West Coaststill doing the absolute most.
So, whether you're new to thisor new to this, sit back and
enjoy.
Tell the kids it's time to playoutside or out of sight.
Tell them there's no questions,suggestions or concerns,
everyone else in earshot.
Be cool, be quiet or you willbe kicked out.
(00:44):
Ladies and gentlemen, boys andgirls, this is SoFloor.
Hello, gorgeous.
Welcome back to anotherfun-filled of snow floor.
(01:10):
I hope your day is shaping up,while mine is fantastic.
We are back on the west coastwatching a little bit of falcon
crafts.
I got a tiny bit of fan mailthat I want to read to you.
We discuss different seasons.
I hope I sound a little bitbetter.
I've actually been down.
I managed to catch a summercold.
Isn't that the most bizarrething?
(01:31):
Awfully frustrating.
I'm sure it's just allergiestrying to settle themselves.
But I thought you know what I'mfeeling.
Good, let me jump on this heremicrophone and let's talk about
this show because it is warmingup Falcon Crest.
I always know that they'regoing to turn out a wonderful
season.
They did something a little bitdifferent this season.
With it being so long, I thinkthis is the third or fourth
(01:54):
storyline.
I'm still expecting a bang bythe end, but this is a little
bit unprecedented for this show,as far as I can remember.
I fully expected this season tobe all about Indiana Chase and
the Vineyards of Doom, but thatstoryline has gone and went and
technically, if you look at theshows we watched today, they had
an entire next season withoutthat storyline.
(02:17):
Go ahead and grab yourselfsomething bubbly and bright as
we jump into season four,episode 22,.
As we jump into season four,episode 22 of Falcon Crest
called A House Divided.
Falcon Crest is not winning anypoints for originality when it
comes to these titles, but Ithink that's on trend for all of
these shows.
None of the titles are all thatexciting.
(02:38):
I guess they're like hey, doyou want a good storyline or do
you want a fancy schmancy title?
You right, you right, storylineor do you want a fancy schmancy
title?
You write, you write.
Okay, this piece of fan mailcomes from him in fresno.
I'm telling you, west coast.
I feel like most of the falconcrust fans are on the west coast
.
Now, before I read this, I'llhave to write her back to figure
(02:59):
out what episode she'sreferring to.
There's some generalities inhere and I do want to kind of
talk about her point, but I'massuming this is towards the end
of season two of Falcon Crest,maybe the early parts of season
three.
I'm not really sure.
Hi, jed, I just had to writeyou after listening to the last
episode because, yes, theAviator Adonis is an absolute
(03:23):
smoke show.
Now that could be any episode.
I think I say that a lot.
I used to have the biggestcrush on him.
That smirk, that swagger, hecould absolutely fly me anywhere
anytime.
Yes, kim, she goes as far asFalcon Crest goes.
I actually loved it frombeginning to end.
Sure, they shuffle the castaround a little bit, but that's
(03:46):
part of the charm.
The later seasons have theirown flavor and I think they
deserve more love.
I think this whole showdeserves more love.
Keep doing what you do, jet.
You're bringing back memoriesand making new ones every
episode.
Thank you so much, kim.
I really appreciate that and Ihave to agree with you.
First off, yes, robert Foxworthyis Foxworthy, he's gorgeous and
(04:10):
he's a phenomenal actor atleast on here I can tell too.
He's another one.
I think I've said this before.
He's definitely a thespian.
He's from the stage and theyjust they're a little bit
different on screen.
You can sort of tell.
It sort of jumps out at you alittle stronger than your
regular Hollywood actors.
It's just a little bitdifferent.
(04:30):
But when I I can't remember whatyear it probably was a couple
summers ago when I was recordingthe show, I was on Facebook a
little bit, had to be verycareful, still managed to not
get any spoilers.
But with the Falcon Crest groupgroup there seems to be two
distinct camps.
There's people who feel like itstopped being good around
(04:50):
season three.
Maybe there's three differentcamps.
People seem to think aroundseason three, some people say as
late as season six, it was fine.
And then there's people whowere like no, no, no, it was
perfect the whole way through,beginning to end.
I think that's par for thecourse, wouldn't you agree?
Any show that's going to have along run, sometimes they go
(05:11):
through those seasons wherethey're just not as interesting
as others.
But I'm thinking specificallynow of, like Walking Dead, if
that's your thing.
I hate gore, but I did end upwatching it, started watching it
probably around season four,and you know what.
Some seasons are more exciting,some seasons aren't.
But I really do think itdepends on when you start
(05:33):
watching something.
For instance, like me, I camein on season four.
I enjoyed it up until I stoppedwatching it.
Honestly, I didn't really thinka one season was better than
the other.
Well, you know, things can'talways stay the same.
Think, oh, one season wasbetter than the other.
Well, you know, things can'talways stay the same.
Sometimes things are excitingbecause they're new.
Sometimes things are lessexciting because the people you
like aren't there anymore.
(05:53):
That's just life.
I'm excited to watch this allthe way through.
We're on season four, we'realmost to the end.
I wouldn't say this season wasboring at all, not even a little
bit.
As a matter of fact, I wouldsay this across the board,
except Knott's Landing, becauseI think Knott's Landing's their
formula is a little bitdifferent, but they are upping
the ante.
I think the storylines aregetting more and more bold,
they're more audacious, they'reum, the jaw drops are a little
(06:17):
bit harder.
I think, all well.
Dallas Dynasty and Falcon Crestare just getting better and
better.
As far as Knott better as faras Knott's Landing goes.
Yeah, knott's Landing goes.
It's on season three.
I thought it was good from thebeginning, but it's a different
formula.
These are just people livingtheir everyday lives, so as
their lives change, things aregoing to get better.
But yeah, would I say seasonthree of Knott's Landing is
(06:41):
better than season one?
Yes, I would, but none of themsuck.
What's your opinion, guys?
You can send a text via the shownotes.
There is a little link ifyou're listening to this on your
mobile device.
There's a little link that sayssend us a text.
Or you can send me an email atsoflorpodcast at gmailcom that's
S-O-A-P-L-O-R-E-P-O-D-C-A-S-Tat gmailcom.
(07:07):
And I know a few of the otherplatforms, I think, like Deezer
and some of those.
Sometimes you can just leave acomment.
It just takes a while for me tosee it.
So if you do send me a text,I'll go.
I'll respond to you always, andif you were waiting on your fan
mail to be read, it will.
I just try to match them up nowa little bit better to the
episode.
So if you're a Dynasty fan, Iwant to read it on Dynasty.
(07:29):
If you're a Dallas fan, I wantto read it on that.
Or if you just have a generalstatement or some really
interesting tea, I tend to readthose just on any episode.
All right, y'all, let's goahead and jump into this one,
because your girl got a littlebit of a blast from the past.
A little surprise, we got a newhottie on falcon crest.
(07:49):
Season 4, episode 22 housedivided.
I think house divided is acommon title across all
platforms, so I'm pretty surethat's a play somewhere.
Per usual, we are going tostart with the bit players, and
on this episode we've got a few.
(08:11):
We're sliding into the end ofthe season, so of course
everyone is going to get alittle bit more screen time.
Seems like they're folding inon some of the stories just to
kind of get them out of the wayso they can focus on the bigger
ones.
But this storyline is what itis.
Melissa and Cole you know theyjust had that shotgun wedding
after he walked out of theirreal wedding.
Now they're in marital bliss.
They are chilling in Tahiti,eating fruit, rubbing oil all
(08:35):
over one another, deciding whatthey're going to do, which is a
whole lot of nothing, a wholelot of loving on each other,
smiling in each other's face,just being sickeningly sweet and
a little bit obnoxious.
So they take this love bubbleand they shout out to Teresa
Giudice.
They take this love bubble andthey push it out.
They go.
(08:55):
That does not sound good.
They go to a looks like a bar,just something off of the water.
You know, one of those littledives where you go in and you
eat the local fish, have a goodtime, drink beers or whatever,
and they're just.
You're so pretty, oh you're sopretty, oh, you're so gorgeous.
Melissa, I love you, oh, I loveyou too.
(09:16):
Cole, I like your skirt.
It's not a skirt, it's a Peru.
Oh, my goodness, we're sobeautiful.
Man at the bar is rolling hiseyes.
All he wanted to do was come inand have a good drunk.
Now he's got to listen to thesetwo fools.
So a little girl walks over tothe table she's holding, like
this basket of flowers, andshe's like hi, sir, would you
like to buy a flower for yourbeautiful lady?
(09:38):
I would have loved to have beena fly on the wall when this
child was auditioning for thisrole.
I know, like I know, like Iknow, she was in that bathroom
mirror at her house every nightreciting these four or five
lines.
She killed it Growing up a boomBaptist.
(10:00):
I used to have an Easter speech, baby.
I was the first one whomemorized it.
I couldn't wait.
Oh, and I felt that energy fromher.
Cole and Melissa are equally asimpressed, like, oh my gosh,
you're so sweet.
What is your name, little girl?
Cole asked her Sue, again,falcon cruz.
No originality points.
(10:20):
Sue Were girls named Sue in the1980s.
That feels like a 60s name.
Let me mind my business.
So Sue presents the assortmentof flowers to Cole and he's
rustling through and he says Sue, do you live in the village?
She says yes, my father is afisherman, as in yeah, I'm local
(10:42):
, my dad fishes, so yeah, I livehere.
She doesn't say hey, where areyou, two crazy kids from?
She don't say all that.
Cole says, well, you're awfullycute.
How would you like to come homewith us and be our little girl?
Gen x, millennials I don't knowabout z.
I feel like I've talked to kidsand my kids about stranger
(11:04):
danger.
They just don't seem thatinterested in people outside of
themselves.
So it doesn't seem to be as bigas a problem.
But when we were kids, strangerdanger, the man in the white
van.
You do not take candy fromstrangers.
You do not go in people'shouses, you don't know.
Okay, you walk everywhere in agroup.
You walk each other home.
(11:24):
That was in a group.
You walk each other home.
That was our whole thing.
You walk each other home.
We would plan our route so thatwe could, you know, like, say,
we were going to the park, you'dmake a big circle, everybody
had one person to walk with.
Let's say, like you lived on theoutskirts or you were a little
further out.
The group would, one by one,drop each other off because
you're walking in a group.
(11:45):
And when you the last twopeople got to the second, to
last person's home, their parentwould drive them back home,
like you did not go anywhere byyourself.
But then, at the same time, howmany places did we go by
ourselves?
It was such a weird time.
So me growing up, it was soweird because, yes, it was still
(12:06):
a weird time.
So me growing up, it was soweird because, yes, it was still
stranger danger.
We had been indoctrinated byour older siblings who would be
gen x.
Our parents were likeabsolutely not, don't go in
weirdos houses, stranger danger,walk with their group.
Even, like when I got older andwent to the club with friends,
you always went to the bathroomwith a friend, like, always walk
in pair.
But then at the same time, inthe same breath, we would go off
(12:30):
on weird adventures and nobodyknew where we were all the time.
Anyway, sue being a Gen Xer, herheckles are up and immediately
she ends this conversation,they're that's it, that's all,
or no money exchange.
Keep the flower.
She's, I'm out, bye.
Turns on her heel, she leaves.
I don't blame her, dude, didyou not hear her say that?
(12:51):
Not only is she local, shelives in the village and her
father ie, she's not an orphanis a fisherman.
I'm sure that's where she went.
To go to Some weirdo from the,from the states, it's like hey,
can I take you home?
Would you like to be our littlegirl?
Plus, sue is at least 10 yearsold.
She's going to be a teenager inno time flat, no, no, she does
(13:12):
not want to go home with randostrangers.
So where?
Um, sue is scared off, melissais pissed off.
When Cole turns around, she'slike oh you funny.
You funny, kendall, you gotjokes.
You want to rub it in my faceone more time that I can't have
(13:32):
any more kids.
You think you real cute?
That's real cute.
Cole is immediately like whoa,what happened?
She's like I heard you askingthat little girl.
What you trying to say?
You trying to say I can't haveno more kids.
You trying to say I'm a failurebecause I don't have a daughter
.
Is that your problem, cole?
You got a lot in there by thispoint.
This is a small, smallrestaurant.
She is making a scene.
Everybody's trying to look overtheir shoulder and try to keep
(13:52):
the peace, like they're noteavesdropping and wrestling.
I was like, oh my God, melissa,you're tripping.
You're going off like you'retripping mimosas.
Melissa's.
Probably all she's been eatingis fruit and drinking alcohol.
You know she needs some carbs,she needs some pasta, she needs
(14:12):
a brisket sandwich or somethingto soak up, something greasy.
But by this point she's alreadyrevved up.
I can't believe.
You said that in front of myface, cole.
You know I can't handle herbaby's cold.
Ladies and gentlemen, this is myartistic interpretation.
He's like you're tripping.
Do you want to go for a walk?
Hell, no, I don't want to gofor a walk.
Because why am I going to gofor a walk?
(14:32):
You're being irrational now.
Usually that word would set meoff.
But I mean he's not wrong, butshe's all I mean.
I get it.
He was wrong for asking Sue tobe their daughter when she has a
family Cause.
That's weird and you're a grownman.
You shouldn't say those thingsto children, especially little
girls.
But Melissa, you know she's.
She had a little bit too many.
She had a little bit too muchto drink.
(14:53):
Maybe she has some tequilasunrises and she's just like she
just needs a little pizza andmaybe a little bit of a nap and
she's gonna feel better.
So she goes back to their um, Iguess it's a hut, but it's like
a honeymoon suite.
I'm sure they're on a resort,I'm sure.
But she goes back and, uh, it'sraining outside.
(15:15):
It's raining cats and dogs andin walks.
Cole, he is completely soaked.
His little floral shirt issaturated with water, his hair
is plastered to his forehead,his peru is sopping wet and this
is his opportunity to come inand look.
Oh my gosh, I thought I'd get alittle sympathy for being
soaking wet in the rain.
(15:35):
And then he removes his top.
So once again I get to see allof his chesticles.
And let I'm to keep FalconCrest.
Come here, come here, come,come, talk to me, come here.
We can all agree that Cole isgood looking.
He is what is with the greasedown.
I come every time I see him.
He is shirtless and glistening.
(15:56):
Jesus, they're really trying tomake fetch happen.
I guess we're going to allow it.
Ladies and gentlemen of theaudience, I need you to remember
that Colesia Birdie is somewhatof a sex symbol, although I
would argue and this is comingfrom a straight woman I think
the thing that makes men sexy isit's a couple of different
(16:19):
things.
Number one, it is confidence.
You can be as untraditionallyattractive as you want to be.
You can be weird looking.
You can be two feet tall, youcan be nine feet tall.
If you are walking throughwhatever room, you walk through
with confidence, women are goingto be attracted to that.
Or, on the other hand, thetotal opposite of that is you
(16:43):
just being kind of a cool persondoing your own thing and maybe
you're kind of unaware of howhot you are.
That's even hotter, actually,but there is something about you
trying to be hot that makes youless hot.
It only and I repeat, it onlyworks on teenage girls.
So maybe they were feeding thataudience.
(17:04):
I'm thinking of super cheesy boyband moves from back in the day
.
Y'all know I love me some NSYNC.
So they were never.
They were never cheesy.
I will, I will, I will fightyou.
They were never cheesy.
But I think of groups whodidn't quite make it and it was
because they were a little too,you know, little geeky, pushing
up their nerves.
It just didn't work.
(17:25):
That's how I see Cole.
I'm not going to get into thisevery single episode.
I made it more than clear onmore than one occasion how
juvenile I find him to be.
But I will.
I'll fold for crying out loud.
Cole is a handsome man.
Do I enjoy seeing himglistening and shirtless?
(17:47):
It's just confusing at thispoint.
So no, okay, who's next?
Oh, I forgot a little bit.
I forgot a little bit.
So once Cole and Melissa sheenjoys his glistening body, they
make up, they make it back toFalcon Crest and of course,
maybe Joseph comes running inthe room.
It's adorable.
I can't believe he's four yearsold.
(18:07):
Let them tell it.
I I can't believe he's fouryears old.
Let them tell it.
I just can't believe it.
But I guess that math is nope,that math doesn't math, because
this show came out in 1982, doesnot math.
But that's so proper growing.
So, yes, I guess in warp speedhe needs to grow at least three
years a year.
Joseph comes in he's like yeah,margaret just dropped me off,
(18:29):
you guys have a good time.
And cole says, yeah, did youget bigger since the last time I
saw you?
Because, well, my muscles did.
Is baby joseph being a gym bro,not the the gym bro comment?
(18:54):
Of course you are.
Of course you've gotsupplements in the kitchen.
Of course you won't ever wantto look at your lats.
Of course you have a gym outfitthat is very on brand.
But you know, maybe he sees hisdad walking around glistening
all the time and he's like okay,I guess, I guess that's what I
got to be.
I could either be that or Icould be.
Oh, he don't really have achoice.
(19:15):
Now that I think about it, hisdaddy is all the way shirtless
all the time.
His extra fine grandpa loves aV-neck in the middle of 1980.
So yeah, I mean that's hisfuture.
I guess you got to start early.
It's a lot of pressure to comefrom that, especially now that
(19:38):
his dad feels like he's a sexsymbol.
But speaking of unabashed, rawsexiness by someone who
definitely knows it, cassandra,the new lady, is sitting on a
secret.
Now, for the record, I'm nottalking about Cassandra.
I'm sure she's gorgeous.
I don't find her sexy, I'm notreally into her, but she's
sitting on a little bit of asecret.
So just a quick little recap.
(19:59):
Cassandra Wilder has sent thisproposal to Richard.
She wants to advertise his newwine, or his new champagne,
francesca, all over the Valley.
She feels like she can reallydo something for his brand.
Now Richard is all into this.
Although he's new to the winebusiness, he's not new to making
money.
So he's like, yeah, let's goahead and get that, get that
(20:21):
locked in, start makingcommercials or whatever.
That's kind of what they agreeon this.
This episode they decidethey're going to go ahead and
move forward with theadvertising.
This episode they decidethey're going to go ahead and
move forward with theadvertising and because Richard
is one third owner of FalconCrest, he would like to do a
shoot right there on theproperty, which makes a lot of
sense.
He's probably saving a ton ofmoney.
The wine, although not producedthere, doesn't need to be.
(20:43):
We have this beautiful winehouse, we have the backdrop.
You want to imply that this is alegacy of winemaking.
I guess it's where he's comingfrom.
He doesn't have the heritagethat Chase and Angela do so by
presenting his wine, althoughit's a little more modern, this
(21:06):
is going to be boxed wine.
Let Angela tell it.
Although it's a little moremodern, this is going to be
boxed wine.
Let Angela tell it.
Chase called it lighter, fluid.
Although it's a new version ofan old thing, he still wants the
reputation.
He wants it to be reputable.
He also has a thing forCassandra, who is quite pretty.
Actually, I noticed Cassandrahad a person with her last time,
a dude.
I didn't really look at him.
(21:26):
This time I'm looking at.
So she's sitting on the couchand her partner I guess he would
be.
They don't really say what heis.
I don't know if he's hersecretary, I don't know what he
is, but his name is Damon Ross.
So Damon Ross is sitting by herand he's like hey, when are we
going to move forward with this?
This is taking too long.
When are we going to get ourhands on Angela?
(21:52):
Cassandra's like patience,patience, these things take time
.
How do you think our motherfeels Damien or Damon, he goes.
I know how she feels.
That's exactly why I want thisto move forward.
Immediately after this scene,cassandra is asleep in bed and
she's having a nightmare.
It is very Carrie-esque.
It is very they're all going tolaugh at you, that kind of
(22:13):
voice, and it's a little girl ina fire and she's like
surrounded by fire, she doesn'tknow where to run and someone
keeps saying Cassandra, but itsounds like they're all going to
laugh at you.
She ends up waking up, gaspingfor air.
(22:33):
She's like okay, so chrisandra.
Chrisandra has a brother nameddamon and there's something to
do with the fire and somethingto do with angela.
So they're using richard to getto angela.
Towards the end of the episode,the the whole photo shoot
magazine spread is happening atfalcon crest and angela's had a
very long date which we'll getto.
She comes storming in therelike hey, y'all wrap this ish up
(22:53):
.
I didn't get permission forthis.
Go and get your stuff and getout.
Richard doesn't make that muchof a fuzz, but he's like you do
know that I could be makingmoney for you too.
Also, I own one-third of this.
Just, I don't care what youdon't get out.
Cassandra introduces herselflike this.
Isning, we'd love to help youout as well.
Angela is old, she don't havetime for that.
(23:15):
I don't need help, little girl.
We already have an ad agency.
It's been working fine.
Cassandra's like well, I know,but we'd really like to give you
a chance.
Angela's like I'm not new tothis.
Like Richard, I am true to this.
I am this.
I am wine in the valley.
I don't need no help from thelights of you.
But the longer she's talking toher, it's like something sort of
(23:35):
tickling the back of her brain.
And Angela goes do I know you?
Cassandra says oh yeah, we metat Richard's place a few weeks
back.
She's like no, no, no, no, no,no, no, something about you is
very, very familiar.
Now, this was Damon's, herbrother.
This was his whole thing whenthey were on the couch.
He's like the longer this takes, she's bound to figure out
(23:58):
something.
So we need to move in on AngelaChanning as quickly as possible
.
But he starts to smirk and I'llbe damned if I'm not hit with an
instant wave of nostalgia.
I said oh, my goodness, didnobody tell me nothing?
I didn't recognize him becausehe didn't have the beard on and
he seems.
No, he's about as tall as Iremember him being.
When I saw that smirk, oh mygoodness, I said is that Riker?
(24:24):
Is that Riker from the USSEnterprise?
Is that Captain Jean-LucPicard's right-hand man, riker?
Although I'm not a tracking, mydad is, and in order to fill
time when I was given the timeto watch TV, sometimes I would
watch Star Trek because I didn'thave a choice.
Sometimes I'd just watch itwith my dad.
I'm like it was fine.
I didn't hate them, I didn'tmind the new one too bad because
(24:47):
of Riker.
Riker was fine, fine, fine.
Y'all google him right nowRiker from Star Trek, the new
generation on the USS Enterprise.
He was flying fine.
He had a beard.
Oh my god, you want to talkabout Chase being fine.
This man was fine, fine.
I had a crush on him when I wasa little girl.
(25:08):
I forgot about that, I forgotto have see until I saw him, and
you know crushes are prettyinnocent as it is.
I wasn't thinking very deeplyof it, but I do remember
thinking that's probably likethe first like man.
I was like whoa, becauseusually, like you, a crush.
I definitely had a crush onwhat's his name?
(25:32):
Go Home Roger.
Definitely Random boys on theshows I watch.
But, oh my gosh, I rememberthinking, hey, fine, fine, I
didn't mind sitting through anepisode because he would be on
there.
Well, I don't know what he andhis sister are up to on this
season, on this episode, butit's something to do with their
(25:53):
mom, something to do with a fireand the way Cassandra spoke
about their mom's, like how longhas our mother waited?
She didn't say how long did ourmother wait, which implies to
me that the mother is alive.
I'm here for it.
Speaking of mothers, connieGiannini's mother is dead.
We found that out the hard waywhen she showed up on time to a
(26:21):
meeting.
But she showed up post-mortem,so it was a moot point or so we
thought.
Chase and Maggie original,original.
Well, I guess it was chase'splan.
Maggie was just there forsupport.
Oh, pause, we got to talk aboutmaggie real quick.
So maggie is a bit player, nota bit player.
This episode where do I begin?
(26:42):
They're so intertwined.
At this point I like to do thebit players just because we
don't.
We don't really need to focusthat deeply on those, those
stories, because the other onesare so much bigger.
But she's woven into two ofthem this time.
So we, the audience, know thatRichard knows Lorraine is
pregnant.
We know that he kicked her out.
That's one side of it.
(27:04):
So the first time we see Maggiethis episode, she as she's at
the radio station station.
She goes into Lorraine's officeand she sees Lance.
Lance is packing all ofLorraine's things because
Lorraine has shown up nightprevious to Falcon Crest without
anywhere or where else to go.
So Maggie is listening to himlike oh my gosh, richard kicked
(27:26):
her out because she was pregnant.
That was crazy.
And Lance was like, yeah, can'tbelieve this fool.
So he's being a man.
Man, you know what I'm saying.
He doesn't want his woman to goup there and be all distressed,
especially if she's Prego.
So he decided to.
He volunteered to go get herstuff out of the office.
He was also secretly hopingthat Richard would run up and
get done up.
So Maggie's like this is socrazy, I can't believe he's
(27:47):
doing the most.
And, mind you, maggie has alwayskind of been on Lantha's side
as far as this whole murdertrial or attempted murder trial
is going.
She never thought it soundedright and she believed him from
the very beginning, like she wasa whole person who's like well,
he wouldn't have been able tohear this train if he had been
there, like she.
She has that in the back of hermind, but nobody's really
(28:08):
digging into that.
As far as we know, they're notreally doing anything other than
talking about the trial at thispoint.
So she's standing at the deskwith Lance and she's like hey,
what about that McCarthy guy?
Has anybody seen him?
Do you think there's a goodchance that maybe he could just
show up out of the blue andstart talking to people?
Okay, I don't know what's goingon with the writers.
(28:28):
This episode that's a little.
That's a little on the nose.
And she says his name for therecord no less than 10 times
this episode.
So we should fully expect to seeflorida man, joel mccarthy,
show back up and lindsay's likewell, you know I hated joel
mccarthy, but a lot of peoplehated joel mccarthy.
I didn't do anything with JoelMcCarvey.
(28:48):
Do you think Joel McCarvey willshow back up?
Maggie's like I wonder whereJoel McCarvey is.
Hmm, okay, richard comes in andtells Lance to get his ish and
get out, and Lance was like no,let him let.
Okay, what if I don't?
And he walks up to him.
Maggie goes over to break upthe non-existent squabble.
Richard is too rich to fight,unless he's punching out old
(29:12):
ladies.
He says Lance, unless you wantto be on trial for two attempted
murders, I suggest you leave.
Lance is like man, I do nothingbut karate all day.
You don't want this rich.
So Maggie, I guess, goes by tovisit her sister, aunt Terry,
(29:33):
and Aunt Terry is trying on thequintessential 80s elf dress.
It is a sweetheart necklinemade of gold lame with a black
skirt.
She tries it on and she's likedang, I should have got this
even tighter.
This is doing nothing for mybody.
Maggie's like that's great.
Speaking of bodies.
Where's the body of JoelMcCarthy?
Where's your ex?
I ain't seen him in a long timeNow.
(29:55):
She didn't say ex, pardon me,she's well.
She says something like that,but ex the way you and I the
audience know that that isTerry's actual ex-husband is not
what Maggie means.
She knows that they were datingand that they were going to get
married.
Terry immediately clams up.
She's like I don't know, goodriddance.
(30:15):
Maggie's like why don't youever talk about him Like what
really went down with him?
I feel like there's somethinggoing on with this whole Lance
thing in him.
Terry also, don't give a damnabout Lance because he's played
her before too.
Remember, he left her forLorraine.
So she like whatever Lance gets, lance got coming wherever.
Joel is good riddance.
He shouldn't have left me highand dry.
Maggie's like girl, you'reacting funny, funny.
(30:37):
Terry goes that was below thebelt.
Maggie's like precisely that'swhere I was aiming, I don't miss
.
Terry says you would never havesaid that if you were my real
sister.
Maggie's like touche, I'm reallyglad you and I share zero DNA,
lest I too be a whore.
She didn't say that, it'simplied by me.
(30:59):
So, maggie, she's just kind ofstone-faced.
She like touche, if you decideto stop lying and talk to me
about Florida, man holler atyour girl, I'm going to leave.
So she leaves and Terry isstuck in this Golden May dress.
Well, there's something aboutthat conversation that starts to
(31:20):
sit with her.
She's like hmm, so she takesoff the Golden May, which she
wants to use to seduce themanimal, by the way, and I'm
thinking she's still on.
Used to seduce the manimal, bythe way, and I'm thinking she's
still on.
She's still working for richard.
She goes to visit richarddressed like a widow and, uh, he
wants to know the latest on oncraig rudin.
(31:40):
Craig, I know I've been callinghim craig.
His name is the manimal.
What's going on with themanimal?
Terry says, uh, I don't know.
He's working on trial stuff andhe doesn't really want to talk
about it with me.
So I mean, he's working ontrial stuff.
Richard says I ain't not payingyou to seduce and produce.
You've done neither today, so Ihave to deduce that you don't
(32:03):
want my money.
Matter of fact, I think youwant Flory man back in town.
And Terry said you know what,richard, I had a conversation, I
talked to myself and I said,self, why on earth was richard
so gung-ho to help you?
And myself said now, I don'tknow, terry, what you think.
I said self, I think I recallright about the time that coke
(32:28):
themed florida man disappeared.
He was running his mouth aboutall this money he had come into.
Remember he came in.
He had on the Usher sweater, helooked like Michael B Jordan,
he had a fresh mullet.
And myself say, yes, self, hedid.
Now, you're right, he did comeout.
He was fresh to death, helooked amazing.
Matter of fact, I think he wason the come up Me myself.
(32:49):
And I agree.
So, richard, I say, instead ofproducing and seducing, I deduce
myself that perhaps you had ahand in this whole Lance Cumpson
setup.
I deduce that if I produce amen, joel, you would be more
(33:09):
inconvenienced than myself.
That's what I think.
Richard squirms in his seat,swirls his milk in his glass and
he's like huh, quite the gamble, terry.
You sure you want to do that?
She's like you know what.
I'll take my chances.
By the way, I quit in not somany words and I'm out.
She gets up and she leaves.
The way I quit in not so manywords and I'm out.
(33:32):
She gets up and she leaves.
Now I'm thinking oh good, terry, your spine is intact.
It is stiffer than it was whenyou walked in.
I certainly hope you were donewith this whole seducing for
money thing.
She is done with the money part,but for some reason she still
wants the manimal.
So she, this girl, loves to getdressed and go over to be
embarrassed.
She gets dressed, she goes overto the manimal's farm, where he
(33:52):
is of course running aroundwith the horses and whatnot, and
she's like hey, why don't we goon a date?
He's like I've been told youI'm very busy.
I can't accommodate that rightnow.
I got a lot on my mind.
She goes okay.
Well then, after the trial, whydon't we hang out?
Why don't we go out?
He's like nah, nah, nah, afterthe trial I'm going to be the
(34:13):
governor of California.
She's like the governor ofCalifornia, how you figure?
Well, this is my politicalcareer, this is what I'm working
on.
This is a high profile case,all the chips are in place.
It's going to be wonderful forme and unfortunately, terry, I
can't be seen with you.
I was just like, oh, okay, okay, okay, I see what it is.
I'm good enough to roll aroundin bed with, but I'm not good
(34:35):
enough to be on the arm of thegovernor of California.
And he's like the governor ofCalifornia can't have a hoe as a
housewife, even if said hoe isindeed a housewife.
But that doesn't matter.
Terry is not deterred, she's notdeterred, she's going to
produce, she's going to seduce.
So by episode's end, she drivesto his house at night, or
(34:57):
actually, she doesn't drive.
She has a driver because she'sa wealthy housewife.
Okay, she drives to his housein a slightly too small for her
frame veiling car.
Allow me to explain.
I'm a tall woman and there arejust certain cars I'm not going
to get into If it is a like a 97Mustang, you know, like a coupe
(35:18):
.
The backseat is not meant forme.
I cannot ride around with myknees up to my chest.
It seems like Terry is not thattall, but perhaps those cars of
ago, this is probably like a1930, 1940s car, it's just is
not meant for what she's workingwith.
So she pulls up to the stables,where Reardon is brushing horse
(35:43):
booty all night, I suppose, andhe sees her and he's like Terry.
I'm really really busy, but shehas to like.
She's in the back seat so shehas to turn and duck her head
out of the window.
But it looks like somethinghappened to her neck.
It is not an attractive ankleand now that I'm saying it is
probably because she has an updo, not so much her height.
(36:04):
But you know, you have to thinkabout these things.
You can't get into a car withtoo tall hair unless there's a
lot of head room.
Wonder how my beehive sistersdid back in the day.
That's crazy now that I thinkabout it.
Maybe they took it off untilthey got where they needed to go
.
Anyway, she's got her neck alltwisted and she's seducing him.
Hey, come over here.
And he's like I'm really notinto it when she goes.
(36:31):
Oh, but I think you are.
She's got on the goal of May.
He's like Terry, I'm reallybusy.
I got horse ponytails to brushall night.
I got depositions to write.
I am quite booked and busy,ma'am.
Well, she's not hearing that.
She opens the door to hervintage villain, silver Bullet,
and she shows him a little leg.
He's like y'all's are y'all'sare gams Girl.
She got on, throws him a littleleg and he's like y'all's a
(36:56):
y'all's a gams Girl.
She got on Girl or gentleman.
She has on regular dagglerpantyhose.
I'm not talking about her legs,like, okay, cool Legs are going
to seduce him.
But tell me why she has onthese tired gold faux chain like
old lady sandals.
That's what gets Griggin goingA good, old fashioned pair of
old lady sandals.
That's what gets green going agood, old-fashioned pair of old
lady sandals.
Which makes me wonder why heain't trying to get with Angela.
I know old lady shoes.
(37:20):
Okay, trust me.
Well, anyway, that works.
He gets in the car and sheallegedly starts taking off his
boots.
Boots will take so long to takeoff.
But whatever, terry and themanimal, we're gonna move on
because I have nothing else tosay about that.
All right, the aviator adonishas had a couple of things to
say.
It's been on his mind.
(37:41):
He does not want the gianniniproperty, but he does not want
angela to have the gianniniproperty.
So what does he do?
He waits till it's dark, hedrives or walks over to Connie's
home.
Connie is Mary's daughter, theGiannini lady, and Connie is, I
guess, she's just trying to getthings in order.
(38:01):
Maybe Reidman left a couplethings behind, or her parents
had a few things in the homethat were left behind when
Reidman took over.
I'm not really sure, but thehouse is filled with boxes
nonetheless.
Chase comes over and he'schatting with Connie and he
pulls the most auntie move I'veseen this season.
He does that whole.
(38:22):
Well, baby, how come you don'tever come see me?
You don't ever come visit?
You don't call, you don't write, only uh, the wine country
version of that.
Well, Connie, you know yourparents worked so hard.
This is a fine bottle of wine.
Look what your daddy them made.
Man, this is beautiful.
Number one.
I struggled too, you know.
I just couldn't stay in NewYork because my heritage was
(38:44):
calling me.
I had to come back here becausethe land wanted me.
Chase, don't do me.
That is not at all why y'allcame back.
I recall distinctly on seasonone.
The only reason they came backis because their daughter, vicky
, who has been ousted.
We ain't seen Vicky in twoseasons.
Vicky was having an affair withher 36-year-old teacher when
she was a 17-year-old and Colewent and beat him up, went to
(39:10):
jail and behind beating apedophile.
That's why y'all moved to NewYork, you and Maggie, maggie,
maggie, you and Maggie werenegligent parents with kids
running amok and you had to dosomething.
So you went all the way to theother coast because your daddy
would set a flame and set overthe side of a mountain.
Talking about heritage, I guessthat's heritage if you just
focus on the dad part.
Well, he starts talking.
(39:40):
Connie's like okay, I hear you,but, chase, I make champagne.
I don't know how to make wine.
He goes well, listen, I can't,I don't worry about that.
This is your birthright, thisis your heritage, this is your
mom and your daddy.
They work so hard for this.
So by the end of theconversation, connie's like well
, yeah, I guess.
I mean, I don't hate it here, Idon't see why not.
I don't think it'd be that bigof a difference to make
champagne from wine.
Let's do it, chase.
(40:00):
So a little later on Chase andMaggie come over and they have
dinner with her on the floor.
They have a picnic on the floor, surrounded by back boxes,
drinking wine.
Now, usually I've seen this inmovies, in film, as a romantic
thing.
I've moved in several times todifferent places.
Um, never had wine and pizza,probably had like beard pizza
(40:22):
when I was younger.
And if there's whatever it is,I don't know it was not a
romantic scene, but I noticedthat scene is also put is
usually put out to be romantic.
It is at this moment that Inotice maggie, the actress, the
lady who plays her.
I know it's something says init.
So la la la sullivan is apretty good actress, but on this
(40:43):
show you can't give her toomuch time to talk because she's
just gonna start rambling.
I can tell she's not reallyreading the script because she's
just going to start rambling.
I can tell she's not reallyreading the script.
Maybe she doesn't memorize itand she just kind of feeds off
of other people.
It doesn't sound bad, but don'tlet Maggie get to talking.
Or perhaps she's been borrowingsome of Emma's meds, because
Emma was on one this episode.
(41:04):
She was tripping, she was goinga little.
Lulu, this little kookaloo.
This episode they end upclinking at glasses.
They're gonna help her.
That's the discussion now.
We don't know everything thereis to know about wine, but we
were kind of coming in like youwere, like we were grown where
chase grew up in it.
Maggie learned it alongside ofhim.
(41:25):
So they're like hey, connie,don't even worry.
What you don't know you canlearn.
You probably know more than youthink because you grew up here.
But we're going to make sureeverything is right and good.
Angela Permrod Goddess is havingquite the week.
At the top of the show.
Lorraine shows up with nowhereto go.
She's like Richard kicked meout because I'm pregnant with
(41:49):
Lance's baby.
Angela knew this, becauseAngela found out she was
pregnant and promptly toldRichard, knowing he'd do just
that.
So she says don't worry aboutit, charlie and I will get a
room ready for you.
You can stay upstairs.
By this point Lance isdownstairs and he's like well,
you can sleep in my room.
Oh, no, she can't.
(42:11):
There will be no fornicating,no fornification in Angela
Channing's home.
Absolutely not.
This young lady will stayacross the hall.
You can come see her in themorning at breakfast.
Well, of course that doesn'tfly.
Lorraine sleeps prettypeacefully that night and the
next morning Lance comesslinking into her room and
(42:32):
crawling into bed with her.
Now I guess things might haveescalated if Emma understood
what a closed door meant.
Mind you, emma is only awarethat there is a guest in the
home.
Do you know?
She don't knock.
She must have used her feet tokick in the door, because she
comes waltzing in with some eggs, talking about hey, I heard we
(42:53):
had company.
I brought you some eggsbenedict, it's going to be
delicious.
Now Lorraine is like oh my gosh, get that out of here.
That smell is horrible.
She's pregnant, y'all.
She's not being rude, she'spregnant.
And Emma's like oh my gosh,gosh, are you pregnant?
By this point they have wokenup.
Perm, rock, goddess.
She had to take out her rollersand fluff her hair real quick.
She came in there.
Yeah, she's pregnant.
(43:14):
I know what he knows.
Now, you know it.
Everybody knows this littlegirl was pregnant.
Lance, what are you doing here?
Came to check on her thismorning.
Lance's trial is not lookinggood.
By the way, let me just throwthis in Angela and Riordan were
doing sort of I guess not a mocktrial, what would you call it?
They were just questioning him,basically rattling off
questions that the defense mightuse to trap him, and he is just
(43:39):
really sucking at answeringthese questions To the point
where Angela's like now, damnman, come on now, just don't say
nothing dumb, that's all.
Come on now, just don't saynothing dumb, that's all you
have to do is don't say nothingstupid.
Craig Reardon says okay, lance,now do you have a good
relationship with yourgrandmother?
Yes, I love my grandmother.
I would never harm her.
(44:00):
If I did, who would make mycookies?
Still, you're going to bemaking cookies in the clink if
you don't get your life together.
Do you want to go to jail?
Anyway, back to that morning.
Angela barks out that everybodyknows she's pregnant.
Let's all stop pretending wedon't know.
So Emma's like oh, that'sexciting.
And then she thinks about it.
She goes wait, lance, is thisyour baby, though this time?
(44:29):
And Angela goes of course it'shis baby.
Emma goes well, dang, I don'tknow.
Lorraine, if I was you, Iwouldn't, don't let, don't let
my mama get her hands on him,because she'll sell him.
She sold joseph one time, ohgosh.
So a little later on, emma andangie take lorraine on a
shopping lunch.
Now I don't know if this is areal thing.
I choose to believe it is.
(44:49):
I choose to believe the upperechelon shop this way.
They're having dinner at orlunch, pardon me, at this
restaurant and there's thiswoman just kind of elegantly
walking around in this reallybeautiful gown, got a little fur
shawl on she's walking andspinning.
At first I thought she was ahostess.
Shawl on she's walking andspinning.
(45:10):
At first I thought she was ahostess, but like they're
looking at her in a way youwouldn't pay attention to a
hostess, if that makes sense.
Angela says Lorraine, what doyou think about that dress?
Oh, it's gorgeous.
So Angela calls a woman over andshe says ma'am, could you go
find something else to wear?
We're going to take that dress.
And Lorraine goes no, no, no,please don't.
I'm preggo.
I'm not going to be able towear that in a month.
(45:31):
Don't even bother.
The model ain't trying to hearthat.
She's got a sales quota to me.
She goes well, we have it alsoin lavender.
Why that?
I don't understand what thathas to do with the fit.
But okay, rich, she's like okay, we'll take both of them.
Lorraine is just oh my gosh,that's so sweet.
I can't believe you're doingthis for me.
(45:52):
Angie goes, no worries, you'refamily now.
So what do you think aboutyellow for the nursery?
Lorraine goes nursery becauseshe's thinking her and Lance are
moving out.
Obviously I also thought tomyself didn't Joseph already
have a nursery?
But the way they're talking.
Emma says that they're going totake the, the vintage bed, out
of Julia's old room and turnthat into a nursery anyway.
(46:16):
Lorraine is like no, lance andI are going to have our own home
.
Don't do that.
Emma says absolutely not.
We have to have a special placefor the air.
And then it hits, hits Lorraine.
Oh my gosh, is this why you'rebeing nice to me?
You're buying me dresses andlunch because I have Lance's
baby, the heir to the FalconCrest throne.
(46:36):
Her acting is abysmal.
This episode, it is horrible.
Her and Lance's acting is not.
It's horrible when they'retogether, but hers is especially
heinous.
Angie goes gosh you.
Hers is especially heinous.
Angie goes gosh.
You're brighter than I thought.
Obviously, lorraine is new tothis.
She is not true to this.
She is not a soap operaaficionado, she is not a soap
(46:57):
queen.
I'm thinking this is probablyone of her first few acting gigs
.
She goes off on Angela mildlyand then, instead of splashing
this woman in the face with adrink.
She picks up a wedge salad anddumps it right over top Angela's
shrimp cocktail.
Now, if you're hungry you canstill eat that, right, no damage
(47:23):
done.
I needed to duck points,lorraine.
What the heck was that?
You can at least spillsomething?
You have to make itinconvenient if you're in a
restaurant and if you'relistening to me, I have to
believe you were a little bitdramatic.
If you were at a restaurant andyou want to make a scene.
Let's say you're in a soapopera and you just found out
that you are a pawn in someoneelse's scheme and you're hurt
(47:45):
because they're not taking yourlove serious and the bastard
that you hold in your stomach.
You got a glass of water, aglass of wine, ranch dressing
and a salad.
What do you toss?
It's the first three, obviously.
The third one is diabolical.
I wouldn't do that.
I feel like I would get introuble.
But at least splash a littlewater on the table.
(48:07):
At least knock over a glass.
No, she awkwardly picks up thesalad and sprinkles it over her
shrimp cocktail.
I'm going to eat both of thesenow, thanks, but Angela liked it
.
She's like all right.
All right, I see you, lorraine.
Lorraine got a little horked.
So after a few more days of allof Angela's rules, which are
(48:28):
basically do not fornicateoutside my house, y'all not
gonna be sleeping with eachother.
I don't want any extra childrenaround here.
Lorraine's not doing well.
Lorraine's being kind of a brat.
She pops off at Emma fornothing.
Then she ends up going over toRichard.
She's like Richard, I cannotlive there anymore, please don't
do this to me.
And he goes you don't live here, you're gone to me.
I don't do this to me and hegoes you don't live here, you're
gone to me.
(48:48):
I don't know who you areanymore.
She does to him when she well,she shouldn't have slapped
Angela.
I don't think she should haveslapped Angela, but she does end
up slapping Richard across hisface and he doesn't cry, but he
almost cries.
Now Rebecca Lynch had alreadytalked to him at the top of the
episode when she found a crushedpicture of Lorraine, or she
(49:11):
when she found a picture ofLorraine in the trash.
She's like dude, this is yourfamily.
Please stop being an idiot, donot push this girl away.
She's having a baby.
The, the daughter that you love, is having a baby.
Like basically saying you'retrying to tell me you don't love
her.
You're not going to love herkid too, because I don't have a
(49:31):
daughter.
That's my stepdaughter, and tohell with her.
She wants to go live in thatlittle cheap, drafty mansion.
Then that's her business.
But after the slap I think hisheart really broke.
Oh my gosh, I can't believe it.
But as she slapped before sheslaps him broke like oh my gosh,
I can't believe it.
But as she slapped before sheslaps them, you were disowning
(49:53):
me because I am having thebastard child of lance cumson.
Why would you in in casualconversation?
When do you ever use someone'sfull government name?
Ever?
Unfortunately, she doesn't havea choice at this point.
She has to remain at themansion, at least until the
trial is over.
So back at the mansion.
It finally comes around toAngela that the land she thought
(50:16):
she was going to be purchasingfrom Connie Giannini is no
longer for sale.
Tell me why.
She finds out that her nephewhad his grubby little hands in
this too.
So she's super pissed.
She gets in the supervillain car.
She has Charlie drive her downthe road to the little mansion,
the little castle.
She knocks on the door, chaseopens it and he knows it's her.
(50:40):
So he's smiling all day andhe's like hi, angie, she's all
hee, hee, hell.
I can't believe you, chase, youthink you're real cute, don't
you, chase?
You think you're real cute,don't you?
You think you're real cute?
I would slap that smile rightoff your face.
He's like well, auntie,whatever are you talking about?
You don't know what I'm talkingabout.
Chase, you wouldn't talk connieinto not selling her land.
(51:01):
All of a sudden she wants tostart living there again.
I can't believe you.
Now, unbeknownst to angelabecause she's going off so hard,
she doesn't realize that Connieis right there in the room.
She says Chase, what did yousay?
I demand to know.
What did you tell that girl tomake her change her mind?
He goes why don't you ask heryourself?
So Angela looks over to herleft and she sees Maggie and
(51:23):
Connie.
So well, well, well, if it isthe co-conspirators, what do we
have here?
What y'all talking about?
How to fumble a bag, how toburn grapes, how to turn wine to
jelly, because y'all damn sureain't going to make no money.
So by the show's end, angelajust has to deal with it.
There's really nothing she cando at this juncture, but I'm
(51:44):
sure she's working up anotherscheme juncture, but I'm sure
she's working up another scheme.
But at the last scene what wefind out when everybody is down
at dinner at Falcon Crest isthat Lance and Lorraine, of
course, have plans to move.
They're just kind of waiting onthis.
They wanted an extension forthe trial.
I don't remember this beingpart of the storyline before,
(52:04):
but maybe it was.
I just wasn't paying that muchattention.
They need an extension and theywant the trial moved out of the
valley so that Lance can have abetter shot.
Tell me why everybody's lookinglike just you know, somebody
died that day.
They look so depressing andcold.
(52:30):
Lance is like what's going totrial on Monday End scene.
I laughed throughout this entireepisode.
It was highly entertaining.
Angela's little whips are asspicy as Alexis's now.
I like this.
Somebody's doing their homework, somebody is competing in real
(52:51):
time and I love it.
And I don't think it betraysthe storyline on Falcon Crest at
all, although I will say thistrial seems like a joke at this
point.
You can't.
Attempted driving recklessly isnot the same thing as attempted
murder.
It's her word against whomeverwas driving.
And if Lance says he wasn'tdriving, then he wasn't driving.
I mean, it's flimsy at best.
(53:12):
Even if he was, this just don'tseem like you would go to
prison for attempted murders Alittle bit over the top, if you
ask me.
But quite frankly, I can't waitto get back to this because I
really, really, really want toknow what Cassandra and Riker
are going to do.
I want to know who their mamais and what that has to do with
(53:33):
anything going on at FalconCrest.
Plus, angela's, like you, seemfamiliar, so I'm trying to
figure out what that is.
God, I love a soap opera, whoknows?
Oh, last but not least, this isthe part I forgot Melissa.
When she and Cole got back fromTahiti, and right before baby
(53:55):
Joseph got there, melissa wasgoing through their mail that
they had missed while they weregone and there was a letter from
her cousin.
Her cousin is coming to visitas soon as school's out.
She's going to come on hersummer break.
It's going to be so much fun.
Cole says I don't remember yourcousin.
Well, cole didn't grow up there.
Melissa's like oh no, this ismy cousin.
(54:15):
She moved about six years ago.
I don't know if she said shemoved to Tuscany or from Tuscany
Valley.
She didn't really say the wordValley, so I'm not sure, but
yeah, we got a new charactercoming.
She and melissa were thick asthieves back in the day.
So do y'all want to take a bet?
Oh geez, obviously you mightknow.
You.
Maybe this is an insignificantstoryline, you don't remember,
(54:36):
but I want to wager a bet.
I think melissa's new cousin hmm, let's see.
Do we think she's going to be agood girl or a bad girl?
I think we.
Terry is probably stillclassified not to be, but
classified in the story as thequote unquote bad girl.
Mellie's a bad girl.
(54:57):
I think her cousin will bemischievous or she'll be sweet
and innocent.
Now, who's going to sink theirfangs into her?
I don't think it'll be Cole.
I don't think it'll be Chase.
We need some more men on here.
Is this another trianglebetween the manimal and Terry
and whoever?
Or Lance?
(55:18):
Ooh, that could be good.
Okay, lance is either going tofall for her or she's going to.
She's going to throw a wrenchin there somehow.
We all know cousins and familymembers saying with me are never
a good thing.
On a soap opera, never.
There's very few exceptions onthis show.
Cousin Michael turned out to beI.
(55:39):
Francesca wasn't bad, but shestill.
She broke up Richard and hissecretary.
So do with that what you will,and his secretary, so do with
that what you will.
All right, guys?
Thank you so much for joiningme today.
Don't forget you can send me atext, you can send an email or
(56:00):
you can leave a review.
Join me next time as we jumpback in for some more Soap Opera
debauchery.
In the meantime, in betweentime, if you were at a luncheon
and things get heated, take onelast swig of your water and then
flick the wrist and splash themto the person's face.
Or, at the very least, stand up, throw your cloth napkin down
(56:21):
and twirl on your heels and makea dramatic.
Whatever you're going to do,stay hydrated, stay moisturized,
mind your own business and keepall of your drama on TV.
Bye.
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