Patches

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Episode Transcript

(00:14):
All right.
So please go ahead and tell methe name of your soul Dog.
Patches.
Patches.
Okay.
And how did you meet patches?
Well, she, I adopted, I adoptedher from the Atlanta Main
Society, which is a main societyhere in Atlanta.
And, and I am forever a cockerspaniel lover.
Okay.
This is over 15 years ago.

(00:35):
I knew I wanted a spaniel and Iused to go every other day to
see what.
What dog is there or whatever.
Oh, wow.
So, and then just to cuddle withdogs or take them out whatever
they allowed me to do that day.
and so I, they, they had acaucus banger come up.
That was when I first saw her.
She was mad at, she had been a,a puppy meal.
They had, they had, they hadlike.
Made her just make babies.

(00:55):
breeds, get popular at themoment, but then they don't get
popular anymore once that's overit's like, we don't wanna take
care of you anymore.
But I used to have a picture ofher when I first got her, but I
don't know how I lost it.
This is before iPhones Right.
she was just all matted up andthen they told, did you want
her?
I was like, yes.
And so they had her for a fewdays.
cleaned her all up.
Then she was beautiful.
I remember the day I brought herhome and I took the week off so

(01:15):
I could like get her adjustmentand everything.
So yeah.
Wow, that's amazing.
You had a whole week home withher.
How long did you wait to meether?
you said you went there almostevery other day or a few times a
week.
It was probably like.
maybe, I dunno if it was a year,It was like I got around my
birthday, which is why I waskind of off.
'cause I normally take week offmy birthday, my best birthday.
It was like perfect.
so I'm thinking probably a fewmonths, like I had just bought

(01:36):
my house and I was like, I getto have a house, I get to get a
dog.
Yes, yes, yes.
That's so great.
How did, she come about with hername?
Patches?
Well, She was white with brown,patches.
and I'm all about peas'cause mycurrent dog is praline and my
dog when I was growing up waspepper.
So I have a pea thing.
Perfect.
what would you say you miss themost about patches?

(01:57):
probably she was just a verychill dog.
Like I got her when she wasolder my mom always joked she's
living a life of luxury.
she got to be in her restingstage.
She had been pumped for babiesfor years and so now she
relaxed.
I was glad that I was able togive her that place of just
relaxing and chilling, you know?
Right, right.
Just be comforting and I get tosnuggle with you.

(02:17):
The perfect pair.
I like that a lot.
Yeah.
what would you say so how oldwas she when you ended up
adopting her?
She was probably like six orseven already.
And I had her until she was like14 and she died.
She actually died on a walk Shehad, heart failure and there was
nothing they could do.
I guess I wasn't ready to puther down.
my dad came over and he dug agrave Tulips are on top of her
grave now, Oh, so she's buriedin your backyard?

(02:39):
Mm-hmm.
So she's always with you.
I love that.
Yeah.
Did you, so you said that youwalked with her, were there any
other, things that you liked todo together or how did you spend
your time together?
was it, just very happy being athome together?
she could go on trips.
we spend a lot more time at homenow that I have a dog that is
more of a home body where myprevious soul dog, Charlie, he
loves to be out and about, but Ido feel like your animals can

(03:00):
sometimes dictate to a certainextent, your lifestyle she loves
to be home.
So I'm like, oh.
You know, I find myself stayinghome more often.
Oh no.
We used to go out, like, shegoes out with me, like, go to my
parents' house.
She goes with me, go to mybrother's house.
She goes, with me, but wenecessarily, did not do a dog
park, but she would go out.
She was not a social dog at all.
Like, just with me, she wasgood.
Or my family.

(03:22):
Right.
That's all she needed, right?
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
so I'm a really big believer inthe healing power of music and
messages through songs are thereany songs that remind you of her
when I saw that, I said you gota friend in me.
I was trying to think of the.
Person.
I can't sing.
She got a friend in me.
I've had other people sing.
It's okay.
So I'm not a singer.

(03:42):
she was my first dog as anadult.
I had pepper when I was a child.
my mom had her, but it was likea family dog.
The patches were the dog that Igot as an adult with my first
job, my first house.
And it was just like, yeah.
I'm an adult, I have a dog and Ihave responsibilities And so it
was just us.
I was at a point in my lifewhere I was just finished
college and just getting intothe workplace and it was just
like she was my buddy.

(04:03):
And what about, what would yousay is the greatest lesson that
she gave you?
Well, I guess, what do you thinkshe would say to you if, she
could say something to you?
I don't know.
I, I just, hmm.
Just probably just thank you,you know Yeah.
she could have gone to anotherhome and was not as loving.
just thank you for rescuing mefrom the life that I had and

(04:26):
just to give me the rest.
And so I think that's what shewould say.
She was thankful for the rest.
Yes.
So much gratitude, right?
Yeah.
on both ends, right?
to have that wonderful, friend,especially right outta school
and starting your life.
she needed, a strong foundationfor her remaining years.
you mentioned that You, buriedher in your backyard.

(04:47):
Is there any other way that you,and of course you're lucky
enough to be able to visit herbody in the backyard if you
wanted to, or just you know,have that presence, of her a lot
of our listeners, are goingthrough the grieving process or
have a soul dog, and have a dogthat they still remember whether
it's five years or 20 yearslater.
some people shared differentways that you may remember her

(05:07):
or how you memorialized her, isthere anything, that you did
special to remember her or stilldo?
Well, I think I've done thisbefore on my social media and
I'm doing something in the eventthat I'm having in May.
It is just an honor wall tohonor our pets that have pet.
Oh, that's awesome.
And so I've done that on her.
she died in September, and soall my social media, I'll say

(05:28):
just, I just do pictures of herjust to honor her and just, just
opportunity for other people tosay about.
Their dog to, give them names,and give life to that idea.
And so that's what I do to honorher.
I think it lets people bringcommunity around that because so
often people feel ashamed oftheir dog being lost.
it's nothing shameful aboutthat.
It's something that's part ofyour life and it's gone.

(05:48):
it could be your dog, yourfavorite tree in your front
yard, whatever works for you.
honor it and talk about it.
It's a safe space Great.
So you mentioned your foundationand your walk.
can you tell me the name of it?
Oh, sure.
It's Fraley Backyard Foundation.
we house pets of domesticviolence survivors anywhere in
the US via, partnership with petboarding facilities and amazing

(06:09):
pet fosters who open up theirhome to, to our survivors.
Pets.
and so we have an annual eventcoming up on May 4th here in
Atlanta and virtually anywherein the world.
One of the things we have, wehave different activity stations
throughout the event, but one Eone activation station is
sponsored by local, animal cre,cremation co cremation company.
Excuse me.
And, it's an honor wall just tohonor the pets that we have

(06:30):
lost.
So you'll definitely befeaturing patches there.
and, lastly, I would just ask,is there anything that you would
like to say?
I know she would say thank youto you, but is there anything
that you would like to say topatches Oh yeah.
I think I would just say thankyou, to her, just because of
what, like I never thought, Ilove my dog.

(06:50):
I had growing up as a child, butI never even thought of how much
love and.
Just love I had for a dog.
I never thought I could, notthat I don't have the capacity
to love, but never thought Iwould have this level of love.
Her, like when she died I wasjust like, like I grieve for a
long time.
I was kind of ashamed of that.
I have a cousin who was sobeautiful.
I'm so thankful for her She sentme a card and flowers and I

(07:13):
thought, thank you.
she really, Understood.
I was really, thankful for that.
I just remember that.
Thank you for sharing aboutpatches.
Yeah.
Thank you so much.