Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey y'all, I'm Dr
Julie Berryman and welcome to
SoulJoy.
In today's episode we'retalking about those pesky
emotions.
Understanding and accepting allyour emotions is a necessary
component of holistic,sustainable self-care.
(00:24):
I call wellness All right.
Thank y'all so much for beinghere with me today.
Can you believe oh my lanta,can you believe that the
holidays are here?
I don't know where the year hasgone, but so let's think about
(00:49):
the holidays.
I think y'all know, but maybenot my husband's a state trooper
here in Texas and then myyoungest son, blakers Blake I
love to call him Blake oh, he'sso sweet, he still lets me call
him that, but Blake is a Houstonfirefighter.
So we've got two firstresponders in the family and for
(01:11):
my first responder wives andhusbands and people out there
y'all know that the holidays arereally different for us first
responder families.
My son and my hubby are usuallyon duty serving those of us who
need them on those days.
So as a family, we justcelebrate when we can, right?
(01:35):
I mean, it's when everyone'stogether and we get to celebrate
.
And Blakers, oh man, he wasborn the day before Thanksgiving
, so he's always he's dealingwith his birthday around
Thanksgiving also.
But that's here and there, justthinking about man.
The holidays are upon us, okay.
(01:56):
So, professional helpers, y'allknow this podcast is dedicated
to preventing and overcoming theoccupational hazards of the
careers that we have chosen.
Specifically, we're looking atburnout, prevention of
compassion, fatigue andvicarious traumas, and those can
(02:18):
sneak up on us and bite us inthe butt if we're not really
careful.
And on top of all this, so thatis why I'm doing this podcast.
I hope that it gets someone'sattention and please know, if
you want more, go to my website,juliemerrimanphdcom, and my
(02:38):
book In Pursuit of Soul Joy isfor sale on that website, and
that's all about overcoming andpreventing these occupational
hazards.
So, okay, last we spoke, we hadstarted to explore our sacral
chakra.
Now this we have our rootchakra, which is the bottom half
(03:03):
of our body, from our sitsbones down to our feet, and then
the sacral chakra is that nextchakra located in our lower
belly.
So, y'all, this chakra is allabout emotions, and I'm here to
tell you I'm here for it.
Emotions are messy and if youtry to escape that, you are
(03:25):
robbing yourself of some qualityof life.
So often we've been taught notto understand our emotions,
right in elementary school, inmiddle school, in high school,
in college, unless you go into amaster's in some sort of the
helping fields, you are nottaught about emotions, and what
(03:48):
we learn about emotions we learnfrom our parents and
grandparents and those folks inour family taking care of us who
most likely haven't been taughtabout their emotions.
So this generational thingstarts occurring, where
everyone's trying to get awayfrom emotions.
See, the fact is, life is messyand our emotions are messy, and
(04:13):
that's normal and that's okay,and we need to hold space for
that and just accept that whenwe're trying to get through life
clean and without causing messfor lack of a better word we're
not doing life like we need todo it.
It's impossible to escape thefact that life is messy and
(04:35):
emotions are messy.
So don't get me wrong, okay,over the years, as I've worked
with patients who were hell-benton trying to escape their
emotions, they really hadcreated some big problems in
(04:56):
their lives and it was justbecause people struggle to
accept life is messy, emotionsare messy.
I haven't done anything wrong,it's okay.
Ironically, when we try toescape emotions and keep
everything all nice and tidy,you stay stuck.
You stay stuck in some emotionsthat are really not friendly to
(05:19):
be stuck in.
I had and maybe I've told youall this, but it's worth telling
again got my phd at texas techsome years ago and dr marbly,
who was a phenomenal uhprofessor.
I was going through some roughstuff, I I forget uh what, but
(05:39):
she sat down with me and she waslike girl.
There are times that you justneed to sit in the hole and feel
what you need to feel.
So you get your butt she saidsomething else into that hole
and feel what you need torecognize and label your
(06:09):
emotions.
You cannot escape them.
I know you help those you servewith this, with finding their
emotions, with experiencingtheir emotions.
But, sweet soul, how do you dothis for you?
As a seasoned helper, or maybea brand new helper, you have
(06:33):
learned and you know emotionsare very complex when we start
digging into them and getting tothe root of what's going on.
There's some deep stuff there.
You've got to observe youremotional responses and you've
(06:53):
got to be able to describe thecontext of those emotions.
Here's how I'm feeling andhere's the situation I'm feeling
.
This, in the ability to bringsuch awareness, has the power to
change your life.
(07:14):
See, thoughts happen in ourhead, but I believe emotions
happen in our body and it can bevery foreign to start trying to
note where emotions arehappening in your body.
(07:34):
I've met with some patientsover the years that almost got a
bit sideways with me when I wasreally being insistent and
trying to help them find thoseemotions in their body.
It was just such a foreignthought for them.
It took a hot minute to acceptthat paradigm and start to know
(07:57):
how to go into their body andfeel their emotions.
So I just invite you to holdsome self-compassion for
yourself in this.
If the thought of going in andtrying to find those emotions
and figure out what you needwith those emotions seems
overwhelming or taxing, I inviteyou to hold some space for that
.
It's worth the journey and it'sworth building this paradigm
(08:24):
for yourself.
See, you have to note where theemotions are happening in your
body and ask yourself what isthat all about?
And then asking yourself, whatis it that I really need?
(08:46):
What is it that I really want?
What is it that I really desire?
As you well know, you got tofeel it to heal it and I know
that's a bumper sticker and itgets kind of thrown around, but
y'all, there is absolute truthto that you can't heal something
you have not felt.
You have to feel it to heal it,because that's where you get
(09:11):
that information you need so youcan get to the other side of
healing.
It's high time you practicewhat you preach, or y'all at
least.
That is what it was like for mewhen I had my crash and burn
that I write about all in thebook, but y'all and I can, I
(09:34):
accept it and I own it.
I could teach others to feeltheir emotions and what they
needed to get out of theiremotions, but I refused for some
reason to take the time to dothese things for me.
Now, looking back, you know Ireally can't even tell you why I
refused to do this for me.
(09:55):
Perhaps I did not believe I wasworth the time and effort.
Perhaps it was too painful andI was scurrying away from it.
Perhaps I didn't recognize howimportant it was.
I was pretty young, really,when I got my master's in
counseling and I think that lifeexperience really helps us be
(10:19):
better counselors, betterhelpers, but for some reason I
didn't do that for myself.
And if that resonates at allwith you, I really encourage you
to go back and listen to someearlier episodes where I'm
digging into the root chakra andhelping you to find, because
(10:42):
there's a real need as we gothrough our root chakra, there's
a lot of work to be done onvaluing ourself.
So I've done a lot of, I'vedone several podcasts on that
and I've got the PDFs and allthat fun stuff with those
podcasts.
But I really invite you to goback to your root chakra and
(11:04):
look at how you are valuingyourself, because when we really
value ourself, we're going totake the time, whatever it takes
, to feel those emotions andnote where they are in our body
and see what need needs to bemet, see if there's some old
schema that needs to be workedout.
Whatever it might be, you'reworth the time.
(11:26):
Okay, so we're about to kickinto the activity and before we
do that, I just want to remindyou to subscribe to my email
list so you can get the weeklyemail for these podcasts where I
include the bonus PDFs or Fsometimes it's more than one of
(11:48):
the activity that I'm about togo over.
All you got to do is hop onover to my website again
juliemerrimanphdcom and sign upfor my email list and I will get
you those PDFs weekly.
You'll also get an email with alink to the podcast.
So every week you don't have tothink about it, I'm just going
to show up in your inbox andwe're going to do this together,
(12:10):
all right?
So today we are going to do afeelings body scan and I want
you to have your journal readyat the end of the body scan,
because it's one thing to gothrough the body scan, but I
want you to process thisall.
(12:32):
That's where the that's wherethe gold is.
When we process what we've done, we've got to have that aha,
that epiphany.
That's great.
But then we need to restructurethose cognitions and that
happens with that processing andthat's where change happens.
That's where lives move frombeing something we dread to
(12:53):
being something we've fallen inlove with, and there's all kinds
of yumminess there for us.
So let's go through this bodyscan and grab that journal at
the end of that body scan.
So during the body scan exercise, I want you to pay close
attention to physical sensationsthroughout your body, noting
(13:15):
feelings in your chakra areas.
The goal is not to change orrelax your body, but instead to
notice and become more aware ofwhere those feelings are living
and what cues those feelings aregiving you that you need to
(13:37):
take care of.
So we're going to move slowlythrough the body scan and I want
you to begin by payingattention to the sensations in
your feet feet Notice if afeeling shows up.
Slowly move up your body toyour calves, thighs, sits, bones
(14:00):
at your root chakra.
Notice any sensations such aswarmth, coolness, pressure, pain
or a breeze moving over yourskin.
Notice if a feeling shows upand ask yourself what that
(14:25):
feeling is trying to tell you.
Slowly move up your body toyour pelvis and lower stomach,
your sacral chakra.
Notice any sensations such as awarmth, coolness, pressure,
(14:49):
pain or a breeze.
Notice if a feeling shows upand ask yourself what that
feeling is trying to teach youabout.
You Slowly move up your body toyour upper stomach, your solar
(15:18):
plexus chakra, and again noticesensations maybe warmth,
coolness, a pressure pain orperhaps a breeze moving over
your skin, noticing also if afeeling shows up and what that
(15:44):
feeling has to teach you about.
You slowly move up your body toyour chest, back, shoulders,
arms, hands and fingers.
This is your heart chakra andyou're noticing sensations maybe
(16:11):
.
Maybe a warmth, a coolness,pressure, pain or simply a
breeze brushing over your skin.
And as you do this, you'renoticing if a feeling shows up
and what that feeling might haveto tell you about yourself.
(16:36):
Slowly move up your body toyour neck that's your throat
chakra, and again you'renoticing warmth, coolness,
pressure, pain or a breeze ofsome sort brushing across your
(16:58):
skin.
And you're noting if a feelingis showing up for you and as you
note that you ask yourself whatdoes this feeling have to share
with me?
About a need I might have?
(17:19):
Slowly move up your body to youreyes that's your third chakra
area, and again you're noticingsensations Warmth, coolness,
pressure, pain, a breeze and asyou're doing that, you're
(17:42):
noticing if a feeling shows upand you're very curious about
that feeling and you want toknow what that feeling might
have to teach you.
And slowly move up to the topof your head, your crown chakra,
noticing again sensationswarmth, coolness, pressure, pain
(18:09):
, breeze and as you're doingthat, you're very curious.
You're noticing if a feelingshows up and you're very curious
about that feeling, wonderingwhat it might have to teach you
about you.
If any feeling shows up, youask yourself might I need, what
(18:37):
might this feeling be teachingme?
And y'all you bring no judgment, just curiosity.
There's no right or wrong.
After you've traveled to the topof your body.
I want you to travel back downyour body through each chakra
(19:01):
until you reach your feet.
So we started our crown,feeling Any feeling there.
Third eye, any feeling there,throat, looking for feelings,
(19:26):
any sensations.
Chest, our heart chakra, downto our belly, upper belly,
sacral chakra, just solar plexuschakra, just being curious Down
to your sacral chakra, reallynoting there that's where a lot
of our feelings live what'sgoing on in your sacral chakra
(19:46):
and then moving your attentionback down to your root chakra,
all the way down to your feet.
Remember you move slowly andyou're just paying attention.
And once we've once we you'vecompleted that body scan, I want
you to grab that journal and Iwant you to write about what
(20:10):
you've discovered, about yourfeelings and needs and your body
, where these things are livingin your body.
Okay, so I'm going to send outthe email with this activity
listed out so you can do it foryourself anytime you want and
bookmark this episode and listento it again and again, because
(20:34):
you it's easy to do this whensomething hasn't triggered you,
but I want you to be able to dothis when maybe you do feel a
bit triggered, maybe you do feela bit irritated or angry, or
whatever it might be.
This is a great time, a greatactivity, to learn more about
yourself.
So, all right, that's it for us.
(21:00):
Today, please subscribe to thispodcast.
Wherever you listen to podcasts, leave a review, help me reach
more people and, until next time, take care of you.