March 10, 2021 • 56 mins
Becky Lightman founder of Lightman Capital, a wealth management firm based in Boca Raton has worked with multi millionaires and billionaires. Today we chat about what she knows...like, what are the some of the traits wealthy people have in common, how we as women (and people in general) do to protect our wealth and starting her career during the financial crisis?
Becky Lightman is the Founder of Lightman Capital, a wealth management firm based in Boca Raton. She advises clients on all aspects of their wealth management strategy— including investments retirement planning and complex trust and estate services. She helps clients navigate their investment options as they face life decisions, and as a result has a lot of real world experience handling all sorts of situations.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hey, Hey everyone.
It's Michelle Baldessari, yourhost to civil good stories in
conjunction with so boca.com andat so Boca on Instagram.
So glad you're here today.
This podcast is all about BocaRaton and being local.
I love interviewing localbusiness owners, folks that are
involved with the nonprofits,things that are happening around
(00:22):
town, places to go and things tosee.
So I'm so happy you're heretoday.
I hope you enjoy this week'sepisode and if you're so
inclined, please make sure tosubscribe to the podcast.
I so appreciate it.
And if you would like to beinterviewed for the show, just
reach out to me.
Everything is in the show notes.
Have a great day.
(00:44):
This episode of so bogus storiesis brought to you by Ms.
Chavela, sorry, with real brokerLLC, serving your real estate
needs and beautiful book fortone and sunny South Florida.
If you have a referral for realestate, please think of me, Ms.
Shelby.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Hey everyone.
So I'm so excited about doingthis.
Um, I'm going to introduce myguest, who I met recently at a
fantastic group.
And I'll talk about that.
So we're just going to do aquick smile.
Then we get the thumbnailanother quick tip for everybody.
Okay guys, I'm Michelle, Balzsorry.
(01:22):
I'm hashtags.
So Boca, many of you know me,some of you don't, some of you
are new to my Instagram viaclubhouse.
How much fun are we having overthere?
I met Becky Lightman.
Who's the founder of Lightmancapital wealth management firm
based here in Boca about when Ithink at the end of January at
fem city, which is a fantasticwomen's group here in Boca.
(01:45):
Um, my daughter is doing thephotography.
I am a member now under, uh, soBoca, but also my new real
estate firm that I just joinedreal broker, LLC, Becky advises
clients on all aspects of theirwealth management strategy,
including investments forretirement planning and complex
trust and estate services.
(02:06):
I deal with some probate in myreal estate world.
She helps clients navigate theirinvestment options as they face
life decisions.
As a result has a lot of realworld experience and trust me,
she did the most fantastic, uh,talk for our group.
And I sit back, you've got tocome on because one, I thought,
well, I told you I was like, fangirling.
(02:27):
You out that day.
I was like, this is normal, goodinformation for anyone, um, who
is investing.
Who's looking at their wealthmanagement strategy and who
wants to understand what theiroptions are.
So welcome to.
So Boca stories, thank you somuch for having me.
(02:49):
It's great to be here.
Yeah, I, um, I love what we'regoing to talk about today
because I'm a mom andmillennials.
You've obviously met Holly, mydaughter, and we talk about
these things.
I am very transparent, um, aboutthe fact that, uh, we went
through that housing marketcrash, uh, back in the mid two
(03:11):
thousands.
My husband had an accident in2010 and our house went into
foreclosure and it was a scary,scary time.
We were able to get through thatand get it out of foreclosure.
But when you're financiallyfeeling strapped and unstable
and insecure, you make decisionson, I think things that you
(03:34):
normally would not make.
So I thought we could talk alittle bit about that today, and
then I have some, some greatquestions for you.
So why don't you tell everybodya little bit about yourself and,
um, we're very casual here onthis, um, interview.
So Becky Lightman,
Speaker 3 (03:51):
All right, well, uh, I live in Delray beach.
Um, so even though I'm joiningso Boca, I'm hearing I'm in Del
Ray about five miles away.
Um, I have been managing moneyfor a little over actually a lot
over a decade.
Um, and I started in moneymanagement back in 2008 during
(04:12):
the financial crisis, which wasan interesting time to start,
but I have been in wealthmanagement specifically.
Um, since that time helpingwealthy families, um, plan and
have, uh, life events that theyneed decisions, helping them
with decisions, helping them,um, navigate turbulent financial
(04:36):
times as well as good financialtimes.
So, um, in terms of the types ofclients that I've worked with,
um, uh, when I started in thebusiness, I worked with people
who had over$10 million toinvest.
That's just to invest so veryhigh net worth people.
(04:56):
And in the course of my business, um, I began at JP Morgan
private bank.
I went on to, uh, work at creditSwiss managing portfolios there
with my own clientele.
Then I moved to Northern trustand I worked in the global
family office group.
That group is dedicated towardthe ultra ultra high net worth
people that have people aroundthem.
(05:17):
So we're talking, Sentamillionaires billionaires, so
that's a whole other ball game.
Um, but in the process, I reallyhelped people.
People are people.
And at the end of the day, itdoesn't matter how much money
you have.
It's are you happy?
Are you making good decisions?
Are you getting the most, youcan out of your money.
(05:39):
And so it doesn't matter whetherit's someone just starting out
or someone who is very wealthy,everyone faces life decisions.
And, um, I really view my job aspart psychologist in terms of
telling people, um, that they'redoing okay, that they need to
stay according to the plan andnot get upset or, uh, super
(06:03):
nervous when in the, um, invitein the market climate.
Um, but it's also a lot ofpeople wondering, is this
normal?
Am I doing my kids?
How much is too much to givethem, um, so that they don't
feel like they need to go outand, and do, uh, you know,
(06:25):
squander the money, but they,they feel like they need to go
out and be productive members ofsociety.
And so there's a lot of, um, iswhat I'm doing normal.
And there's been a lot of, um,change in the sense of time that
I started in the business, a lotof new regulation.
And I also think it's, um,exciting that, you know, when I,
(06:50):
I chose to go out on my own inthis business, because I believe
there's a real need for womenwho do this and why women.
Um, I don't think, um, I, in myexperience approaching clients
with empathy and trying to putyourself in their shoes, rather
(07:10):
than telling them what to do,makes all the difference in the
world for my clients.
And as an approach, I do thinkthere are a lot of men and women
that feel more comfortablehaving a woman advisor.
So it was very important, um,for me to have that ownership of
the firm and be able to controlthe direction of, of the firm.
(07:33):
So that's, that's the brief, uh,explanation of that.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
And I think that was one of the things that, uh, when
Allie and I saw you speak and wewere talking about it on the way
home.
And I said, you know, it's, it'sreally nice to see, you know, a
woman, uh, financial planner.
I know there are other ones, but, um, the way that you spoke
about what you do, how youassist the empathy that you
(07:58):
have, and some of the storiesthat you shared in particular
about women who lifecircumstances change, because
they're not familiar with thefinancials of their home or
someone else's handling it forthem.
And then there is a life eventand all of a sudden that is a
major, major deal.
Um, that, that was huge.
(08:20):
And I think the entire room,which we were social distance
went like, Oh my God, could thathappen to me?
That was, I think, I think youthrew such a good aha.
Like I need to soft check here.
So I appreciate that very, verymuch you have worked with, um,
(08:41):
multimillionaires andbillionaires.
What do you find are the traitsthat they all have in common in
regard to wealth and wealthstrategies?
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Yeah.
So this is one of the funnythings, because I've worked with
every one from basketballplayers to go first to, um,
lottery winners, which are someof the most fascinating work
with.
Um, and so people come in totheir money, all different kinds
of ways.
And there are some people thathave just inherit money that
(09:13):
will always be, you know, forlack of a better term, you know,
not productive and just livingon that money.
Um, some people might use theterm trust fund babies by and
large.
That's not who I've worked with.
I have not seen a lot of that.
Um, I think it's reallyinteresting.
Some of the traits that verywealthy people have, um, we
(09:34):
forget that they are people too,and they came a lot of them.
They are self-made.
And so I thought you would get akick out of some of the things
that I have noticed that a lotof people have in common that
wouldn't have won enough thoughtof.
So the biggest thing, when a lotof people who made and created
(09:55):
the wealth were told at somepoint that they weren't good
enough that they couldn't makeit, that there were some
achievement that they didn'tattain and they got fixated on
proving their worth and provingthemselves.
(10:15):
And I, I noticed every one who'sreally been successful has
something that was a setbackthat they were trying to make up
for.
And a very good example of thatwould be Warren buffet.
He obviously is very, uh, anincredibly, um, skilled, uh,
(10:39):
stock picker and investmentmanager.
But in when he was in his teens,he was dead set on going to
Harvard.
And he figured it was, he was ashoe in, it was going to get in.
And, uh, then he got rejectedand he was devastated.
(10:59):
He even told people, um, he hadbeen telling people, I'll see
you at Harvard.
Um, he was that certain it wasgoing to get in.
And when he got that rejection,he basically will still say that
that rejection was a pivot pointin his entire life.
And I also noticed some of thatwhen people, um, who are don't
(11:26):
have educational credentialslike others, um, decide, and
we're talking people that nevergraduated high school, um, they
want to go out and provethemselves to the world too.
They want to go out and prove,okay, I didn't have a college
degree and look what I've done.
Um, that, um, that encouragementfrom having something wrong
(11:51):
happened is super motivator,super motivator.
And so to anyone who has hadthat happen or been told, no,
um, use it to your advantage.
You know,
Speaker 2 (12:04):
It's very interesting scenario.
It's like, almost like you wantto say, okay, I'll show you,
this is what I'm going to do,and this is why I'm going to do
it.
And it's a self motivational, Iguess, trait.
And I love hearing those kindsof stories because we do.
And, and for those of you thatdon't live where we live.
(12:27):
Um, we have a lot of wealth herein South Florida, tremendous
amount of wealth, um, and alsolike in the Naples area, huge
amount of wealth there.
And, and we see differentlevels, I guess is the best way
to put it.
Um, so it's fascinating when youtalk about the self-made, uh,
(12:47):
you know, millionaires,billionaires, and I think you
mentioned a term that I havenever heard S sent, sent
Speaker 3 (12:54):
A millionaire.
People have hundreds of millionsof dollars.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Oh my God.
I had no idea.
There was even a term good toknow.
So
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Leads me into the next part of our conversation,
which we talked about it, thefem city, um, which is that a
lot of wealthy people.
I mean, we think by allmeasures, you know, you have 25
million, you're doing extremelywell.
They don't view it that way.
A lot of the time are on thehamster wheel.
They're trying to prove to otherpeople that they can do more.
(13:24):
So when you're 20, you're worth25 million, you're hanging out
with people that are worth ahundred million when you're
where the a hundred or 200million are hanging out with
people that are worth 500million.
And you feel poor like a lot,unless you're, um, bill and
Melinda Gates, uh, or Jeff Bezosand his ex wife, you're feeling
(13:45):
poor because you're surroundingyourself with people who have
done it better.
I particularly see this with thepeople of hundreds of millions,
of millions, of dollars, wantingto prove that they can become a
billionaire and they can be 400list.
Um, so that's, again, it's,it's, you know, for all of us,
(14:05):
we would say you're winning thegame of life, right?
They don't feel that way.
And that's still chugging andit's, it's a motivator.
Um, another thing that I noticedwith wealthy people is that a
lot of them got lucky.
They look, you know, part of itwas being in the right place at
(14:26):
the right time and being able to, um, take advantage of an
opportunity that came my way,they, the most humble ones and
the ones that I love to workwith are the ones that readily
admit that.
But there's more to it thanthat.
It's more than getting lucky.
(14:47):
It's the ability to see an andprosecuted on it quickly to make
snap decisions and say, I'mgoing for this.
I'm not going to have anothertime to do this.
And so a lot of what we callliquidity events, where people
come into a lot of money andthey're self-made are people
(15:10):
looking in the eye ofopportunity, realizing it
quickly, not getting to analysisparalysis, Rory, and to get more
money for that opportunity.
You see people able to justtake, look the gift horse in the
mouth and, and go for it.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
You know, it's so interesting.
I just, I have another Instagramaccount that I use for my
training and coaching andspeaking more so for real estate
is at the Michelle B.
And I did a post last nightabout when opportunity knocks
open.
The, and I literally likechanged it because I want it to
be a little more discreet, but Isaid open the, you know, open
(15:48):
the door.
Um, and I, I posted that becauseI, I, myself made a change
recently in real estate firmsand I'm 58.
And I wanted to make a pointthat it doesn't matter how old
you are, opportunities stillcome by.
And if you, if you think toolong or you don't act on it, you
could really lose an opportunitythat could be fun, fabulous, and
(16:12):
profitable.
And so I love that you aresharing this information.
And I think women in particularsometimes are a little more
afraid to, um, act quicklybecause we, we have family
obligations.
We want to run it by somebody.
(16:32):
Sometimes you just have to act.
And so that leads me into mynext question, which is what can
we, as women and people ingeneral do to start building our
wealth, if we're right, youknow, starting over, perhaps
maybe we have a little nest egg,and then what do we do about
protecting it?
Because I work with probateproperties in real estate.
(16:55):
I work with seniors downsize andI work with some divorce
situations.
And a lot of times there areissues with money, um, that is
either not there or somebody'sgot their hands in your pocket
or whatever it is.
So share some thoughts on that.
Becky, if you don't mind.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
First thing that I think of is you're in real
estate and you see people intimes of life transition, see
all the time, and they're havingbabies when they're getting
married and starting a new hometogether when people are getting
divorced and they have to sellthe house, or when someone dies,
(17:34):
this is the same stuff that as awealth manager deals with.
So advice to women is reallysimilar to advice to men.
Um, but sometimes there'sfeeling that, um, I can't do
this or I'm not certain.
(17:55):
So everybody is the same.
And I'm, I've always loved thatwhen someone doesn't speak to me
differently, because I'm awoman, this is the advice for
everybody, and you should do it.
Um, siphoned off maps out your401ks.
If you are lucky enough to workwith an employer that will match
(18:16):
just max it out, just take itoff the top, get that done,
because that is that's moneythat you, you won't see and just
don't raid the 401k.
Either try to make that out ofyour mind, something that you
never, um, touch.
Um, and there's ways if you'renot with a company anymore, that
(18:37):
you can roll those over andtreat them as IRAs.
Um, they're called rolloverIRAs, but that's how you get the
401ks out.
So I would say maxing that outretirement planning is a big
thing that a lot of people justaren't focused on because
they're spending, spending,spending one of the difficulties
about being in South Florida isthe keeping up with the Joneses.
(19:00):
And that is men as much as womenguys, you know,
Speaker 2 (19:06):
It's a, it's pretty obnoxious.
Let's just call it what it is.
It's pretty bad.
And the stress that it causespeople is huge and they don't
talk about it, but the rightschool, the right car, your
diamond bring isn't big enough.
I mean, there's so many thingswe could talk about in regard to
that
Speaker 3 (19:24):
And advice to anyone, don't be the credit card
millionaire.
Um, I call a lot of SouthFlorida.
A lot of people have beenrecommended to me and I have
account minimums and theirfriends say there, there were so
much money that travel all overthe world.
Um, they drive very fancy carsand really there's no savings
there.
There's no nasty.
(19:45):
So I would say build a nest egg,put money aside with every
paycheck.
If you can get it taken outbefore it hits your bank account
and get an invested and get itinvested.
And don't worry about thetiming.
Um, if you are, if you're inyour mid sixties and your
seventies, and you feel likeyou're going to be drawing on
(20:06):
that money, then you might havesome more short term
investments.
But my advice to everyone isjust regularly do what's called
dollar cost averaging, get intothe market and don't leave it
don't sell when the market'slow.
Um, um, the best thing to do isstay in the seat and that's,
it's the job of a good planner,get a position in place, get a
(20:29):
plan in place, and then executeon that planet, stay in the
seat.
That's the best thing you cando.
Um, so that's,
Speaker 2 (20:36):
So one of the questions that I had asked you
because I am a realtor and, um,real estate investment is part
of my world.
Um, and I get asked this, whichyou probably do too all the
time, which is how's the market.
Should I be investing?
Should I be wholesalingflipping?
What kind of real estate shouldI be doing?
(20:57):
Obviously right now we have somany people coming from the
Northeast due to high taxes,high property taxes.
And then of course we're a nostate income tax state here in
Florida.
So it's a very desirable fromthat perspective place to come
along with, we have amazingweather and our lifestyle here
(21:19):
is bar none.
Fantastic.
I mean, I don't know.
I mean really, maybe California,but that's a whole other issue
over there.
They're coming here now.
Right.
Um, so talk a little bit aboutreal estate and, and your
thoughts on that.
And I know that you started yourcareer during the housing crash,
(21:39):
which presented opportunitiesjust like COVID did, as horrible
as this has been.
And I had COVID mid-summer itwas horrible.
So I really do not take anythingthat's gone on, uh, during this
time lightly.
Um, but there were some momentsof clarity for me, and also some
(22:06):
positives during this entiretime.
Surprisingly, one of which wasthe real estate market did not
crash.
We literally, I think everyrealtor in South Florida exactly
one year ago, basically, right.
Went, Oh, what are we going todo?
I mean, that really was it like,Oh my God, here we go.
(22:29):
Again, many of us had gonethrough that.
Hasn't crashed and you literallyare like, Oh my God.
And here we are, and this is thecraziest market.
It's busy, multiple offers onproperties and who would have
thought, so I'd love for you toshare your insight with our
(22:49):
audience today.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
Um, all of those things are so true.
Um, we're in a total housing andbuilding boom.
I was actually worried aboutdoing this Instagram cause
there's four houses that are bymy driveway being constructed on
it.
Boom.
Yeah,
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Yeah.
Don't worry about it.
My dogs will bark any minute.
Speaker 3 (23:11):
I know I'm always thought as a wealth manager that
you need real estate andmarketable investments and
liquid investments that areinvested in the stock markets.
Um, I've always think thoughtthat they're complimentary and
you really need to have both.
And to the extent that, um, youcan get into a home that you own
(23:37):
or condominium that is reallyimportant now in a situation
like this, where there's offersmulti and cash offers in sight
unseen.
I don't know what to tellpeople.
I know you can't time.
The investment markets.
I, I think there's a lot ofcyclicality to the building
(24:00):
markets and, but I just don'tknow how to time it.
I, I think this wave of NewYork, New Jersey, Connecticut,
uh, Vermont, it's all comingdown, it's continuing and it
could just be, Hey, get inparticipate, stretch.
I will tell you that everyfirst-time home buyer, it feels
(24:23):
like a stretch.
I know horrible in the firstyear, especially because you're
not sure if you overpaid, you'renot sure you may not be able to
furnish the house.
Um, and you feel just very cashpoor, but it's almost stretch.
Um, and right now the stretchfor the way that these, um,
(24:47):
houses are priced.
I mean, you know, things thatwere 400 or 500,000 year and a
half ago are closer to 800 or900,000, but you've got to pay
to play.
And hopefully the market valuesjust continue to go up.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
One of the things that I am seeing too, is our
friends from up North are havingsticker shock.
They are coming here and they'relooking online and they're
saying, this is a milliondollars, that's it?
And I'm like, I know you'regoing to have to make the
decision that you're going toget what you need to get to get
(25:26):
out because that's what theywant to do.
And look at all the otherpositives.
And you may not have the biggesthouse on the block.
You may not have the same sizehouse that you have up North.
Um, but you've got to look atthe other reasons that you're
here.
And then maybe in a coupleyears, you upsize, if that is
your jam, you know, um, and it'sa shock when I talk to people
(25:51):
and I looked at houses with someclients recently and they're
surprised.
So
Speaker 3 (25:57):
What would be your advice to people looking at
purchasing homes right now?
What are you telling them?
Speaker 2 (26:04):
First thing is, um, if you love something and it
hits most of your, you know,boxes, make the offer and make
it your highest and best offerbecause you're, you know, we
have multiple offers oneverything don't waive your
inspections, do not waive yourinspections.
If you need to do a two dayinspection, then do a two day
(26:27):
inspection.
I would feel very uncomfortableagreeing with a buyer to do that
because you just never know.
So, you know, at some pointthough, when it's happening is
they're having to remove thecontingency just to be
competitive.
And that's how this market is.
(26:48):
That's a little scary.
Um, but it is what it is,
Speaker 3 (26:54):
No inspections.
And our people get then going onthe other side and getting
mortgages like cash outrefinances.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
Yeah.
Some of the people are doingthat.
Also a lot of cash right now,like cash purchases.
And of course, sellers love cashpurchases because there's no
appraisal contingency typically.
So lender, lenders notrequesting it.
So that's a little reminiscentof the housing boom that we
(27:25):
experienced before.
And that is a risk that you'regoing to take that could you end
up being upside down at somepoint, maybe who knows?
It's hard to say nobody has acrystal ball.
Um, but I'm, I'm a firm believerthat, um, if you can get some
sort of inspection, get one,like one onesy twosy, like just
(27:45):
get in there, make sure there'snothing serious, like mold, it's
the big stuff, mold, roof AC.
You want to know.
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Now, one of the things we talked about privately
and aside when I spoke was how,um, real estate is the great
equalizer in a lot of ways forwomen.
I mean, we've all heard of thecorporate world being paid less
than men.
Goodness knows it's happened tome.
It's happened to me.
(28:15):
I know you can't get away fromthat.
What a spirit you can own.
Anything privately.
No one has to know you run itbest men or you flip it.
Is there any bit of thatinequality in real estate or do
you think that's a great playfor people who are, who have the
neck for it?
Speaker 2 (28:34):
I think it's a play.
I love it.
It's something that I, um, wantto do more of this year and
continue because I do like itand I do feel, um, it is a great
equalizer and you're right.
You know, not everybody needs toshout to the world how rich they
are, you know, and I think it'sall about being comfortable.
(28:59):
What makes, so, you know, yousee realtors, you know, putting
out there that they sell thingsand this is what they've done.
And at the same time, um, isthat it's an it's important to
them.
Of course.
And it's important to me, likeif I have a really significant
sale, I do want to share that.
I think people want to see thatyou're successful and you're
(29:19):
active in it.
But at some point, when does itstop really being that important
and you know, you know what youneed to live the life that you
want, like that if$150,000, youknow, is cool for you and that
makes you happy and that letsyou do what all the things you
want to do fine.
If 60,000 does, that's fine.
(29:42):
You know, like there's no rhymeor reason, right.
It's really, I think what makesyou happy?
And you talked about these highhigh-end clients that you've
worked with and you know, andthe happiness piece of it.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Right.
Right.
And I will say a lot of, um,what I've seen and this is, you
know, a lot of people, thewealth is not their sense of
purpose.
It's what they're doing.
It's what they enjoy doing.
And they get a charge out ofthat.
And, and, and if you, you know,at some point you have enough
(30:19):
money, have enough money, uh, itmakes your life more
comfortable, happier.
Um, and there's actually beenstudies that over a certain
amount of wealth, people are nohappier.
And actually that, that wealthnumber is around$270,000 to give
(30:40):
you an idea.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Well, there you go.
And you know, we have a lot ofrealtors that are watching right
now, and I can tell you that todo six figures in real estate is
really not that difficult, butironically, the average income
of realtors under 40,000 a year,I've heard, it's a shock.
It's a shock when you reallyhear that.
Um, and of course price pointcomes into play.
(31:02):
So you may have to do moretransactions if you're in an
area with the lower price point,but if you're in an area like
this and you study your careerand you know, you've been
mentored and you know whatyou're doing, you should be able
to hit at least a low sixfigure, a hundred thousand, you
know, with what you're doing.
Um, but that's a reallyinteresting number 270,000.
(31:25):
I, I really had no idea and I'msure people watching and
listening wouldn't even thinkthat most people think, well,
you know, if I have a millionI'm happy, but you're right.
That's fantastic.
I love hearing that kind of stat.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Um, you know, one of the things that we talked about
and I spoke about it, thelunches, um, being careful who
you give money to, um, and howyou can easily part with your
money, if you're not beingcareful.
And I thought it would be verygood to talk about a couple of
(32:01):
cases, cases are always moreinteresting cases or give you a
sense of the real people behindit.
So, uh, first example, um, whenI started in this, um, in this
business a very first week, Imet with some people who had won
the lottery.
Um, they were up in New York.
(32:21):
Uh, gosh, I forget how much theywon.
Probably at least 150 millionafter taxes.
And they, um, they didn't evengo home to their neighborhood
that night when they got thewinning ticket.
And they saw that they had won.
They didn't go back.
(32:42):
That's how bad theirneighborhood was in New York.
And, uh, they were justfantastic people, very, uh,
generous.
And they gave a lot of money too.
So that 150 million in aboutfive years' time was down to 30
(33:04):
million.
Oh my gosh.
And what did they do?
They did a lot of things.
They gave a lot of money tofamily members and they built a
lot of, they got a lot ofhouses.
They got the cars, they did allof that.
I didn't really invest themoney.
They just spent it down.
(33:25):
Um, one of the biggest thingsthat they ran into trouble with
us, they wanted to give back totheir church and they gave their
pastor, um,$8 million to go tothe church.
And that pastor left a country.
(33:45):
He absconded, he was, um, andhere these people were trying to
do something good.
And I'm not saying by any meansthat you shouldn't give money to
your church or your temple.
I'm saying this was an exampleof giving money to a bad person
that meant ill.
That was not, and, and reallytripped them because they had
(34:06):
trust.
So you have to be reallythoughtful about you giving
money.
Another, a very good example ofgiving a lot of money, um, and
not having it go your way iswhen Mark Zuckerberg made a huge
donation to the New Jerseyschool system, but he didn't
really have a plan.
It wasn't a foundation, it was abit of a mess and it didn't
(34:29):
achieve what he wanted it to.
And that is, you know, so hehe's been vocal about, he, you
need a plan.
If you're being philanthropic,you need to make sure the money
goes to the right place.
Talk about family members for aminute.
Family members are wonderful andwe love them and we want to help
them.
(34:50):
But everybody has had a familymember that just no matter what
they get, it's gone.
And they, they really can't saveurgency after the next.
And there's not much you can do.
So I was working with, um, abasketball player and a very
large family, and they werealways asking for, for money.
(35:15):
And he didn't know initiallywhat to do.
And an aunt that asked him formoney to, um, replace her roof
was$29,000.
And of course he said, sure, heto replace your roof.
Um, and he gave her the moneydirectly.
So the next time you went to herhouse, there was no new roof.
(35:40):
There was nothing.
And he felt so low in thatmoment.
He felt so betrayed.
Um, it hadn't been used, hedidn't know how it had been
used.
Um, so, you know, giving loansto those family members that are
not responsible, you may as wellsay goodbye to the money, if
(36:04):
you're okay with that.
So be it, but don't expect toget that money back.
It's really a gift.
Um, and there's giftingstrategies.
You can give up to$15,000 everyyear, um, to, to people, um, and
not have any kind of gift tapsor, you know, there's, there's
ways to do this.
But what he did was prettyinteresting.
(36:26):
He set up his own, uh, familyfoundation, not really
foundation in that he requiredwas required to spend anything
and it wasn't charitable, but hebasically set up the structure
for the whole family and said,I'm only giving$10,000 a year to
you guys.
And what you want to do withthat, it's gotta be toward
(36:50):
education or some sort of, youknow, causes that he had laid
out in advance when he put upthat gate, that was when things
normalized for him.
And he felt he was able to givemoney.
So instead of giving to the aunt, pay the roofer, he paid
directly instead of giving to anuncle to pay for their
(37:14):
children's education, they cutchecks to the school directly,
or he bought the backpacks orthe school supplies directly.
Was it an extra hassle?
Yes, but it made sure the moneywent to the right place.
And there are so many peopleknocking on your door when
(37:35):
you're a professional athlete.
And one of the things that wedeal with as wealth managers,
when we're working with them isthe posse.
The posse could be like 10people that are trusted advisors
that are surrounding the person.
And it can get overwhelming whenyou're talking to people about
their money, because all ofthose people, a lot of them
(37:57):
anyway, have their hands out forthat money.
So when you're dealing withprofessional athletes, um, it's
so much about trusting the rightpeople.
And LeBron, James is a terrificexample of someone who's done
this very well.
His, um, his family officemanager, who's like one of his
best friends from high schooland he's kept it really tight.
(38:19):
He trusts him and theysurrounded himself with good
advisors with lottery winnersthat I was talking about
earlier, got into trouble, isthey, their brother was an
accountant.
He was a CPA.
So they gave the money to do thetax returns.
And he did on a tax software,which you really can't do for
(38:42):
such a large, um, family.
And there was an IRS tax penaltyof$4 million as a result.
So surrounding yourself withgood advisers is so important.
If you have someone like you forreal estate, like me, for wealth
management, we're going to helpyou get that team to help you
get the right CPAs.
(39:03):
We're going to make sure youdon't invest in things like
Madoff.
We're going to make sure thatyou are covered and that your,
everything is on the up and upin quite frankly, in South
Florida, you know, people areeasily parted with their money
by hearing about stock picks or,you know, sort of investment
funds on the golf course.
(39:23):
And there's very little vettingof those investments.
It's you really need goodadvisors in place.
And, um,
Speaker 2 (39:31):
And you know, I will tell you, and this was back in
2011, I think it was.
And, um, I had a referral for abuyer whose family members lost
money through Maydoff.
And so, you know, you kind ofsix degrees of separation.
And then I saw on, I think itwas the today show, uh, Phil
(39:53):
Donahue and Marlo Thomas aredoing this podcast about married
couples.
And a lot of people don't knowthat Kevin bacon and Kyra
Sedgwick lost everything becauseit made off, they lost a huge
amount of their life savingsbecause they, if there was
probably more like a handshakething.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Wink, wink, you know, Oh, wellwe're friends with this person.
(40:14):
Oh yeah.
He's a great guy.
And you know, when you watchthis series, um, there's a
couple of movies about it, andthat was pretty much how he did
that, you know?
And, and I think that you bringup some good points with the
athletes and some of the thingsthat they're doing or could be
doing, um, when it comes tostarting out, for example, you
(40:34):
met my daughter, um, she's 25and my other daughter's 30.
Um, my other daughter works foran airline is she is getting
matching for her four Oh one.
Um, they have done them justextremely well under the
circumstances of, you know, shewas furloughed, but let me tell
you something, they spirit, uh,has done a phenomenal job, uh,
(40:56):
with their employees, likephenomenal.
And she's going back in April,um, and I've always liked the
airline.
So, you know, there you go.
But that piece is really goodfor them, but my other daughter
is an independent contractor.
So for, you know, people thatare starting out independent
contractors, um, who would yourecommend that they reach out
(41:17):
to?
I know, uh, you know, peoplelike yourself sometimes have a
certain, um, criteria in regardto how much money somebody has
before you work with them,because you've been doing things
for a long time.
So, you know, what your criteriais, but what kind of thoughts do
you have on people who arewanting to get started?
Speaker 3 (41:36):
I think, um, you know, I, I have to, the gig
economy is the directioneverything is heading.
So you're, you're, um,independent contractor that
that's what's happening.
That is the new, um, that's thenew economy.
And that's how a lot of peoplehave gotten by, especially in
the pandemic.
(41:58):
Um, I think for, for them, it's,you know, your daughter is a
photographer, right?
So I think it's a matter ofgetting my AirPods connected.
Hold on, am I unconnected on theairplane?
(42:20):
You sound fine.
Okay, go ahead.
Um, so I think for them get, tryto get big clients.
Then it's all about connectionsbecause if you have one or two
big clients, then you aregolden, but if you have a
million small clients, you'regoing to get very distracted.
(42:42):
It's going to be hard.
There's only so many ways youcan get stretched.
Um, so I think for yourdaughter, who's the
photographer.
She's got to get into corporatephotography.
Probably it may not be herpassion, but she's going to be
great clients that are going toneed her for every event.
This puts things in a regularcapacity and for the independent
(43:06):
contractors, but even for a lotof real estate folks, the pay is
so lumpy.
So you've got even an outprepare for the bad times,
trying to get those big clientsin for, for a lot of people
where you've got to be able tohave, um, one or two people in
your back pocket that are goingto refer you.
(43:27):
They're your champions.
They're the people that say, youknow, if you need to talk to a
realtor, I know the woman it'sMichelle.
And you know, if she's, uh, anindependent contractor, she's
got to get that the only way toreally do that is your network
people, the people they know.
(43:48):
And I will tell you that even ineven my case, I work with a lot
of accountants and estateplanning attorneys, and I'll go
to lunch back in normal timesand I'll see them with other
financial advisors and all ofthe financial advisors are
buying them lunch and trying toget their referrals.
Um, I think it's sometimes good,um, to figure out your five
(44:13):
people.
Speaker 2 (44:13):
Yeah.
I say your handful of baby, yourhandful.
So does he
Speaker 3 (44:19):
And those five people are in your corner and they're
going to be referring you.
So anyone who's starting abusiness, I would say that now I
will tell you that what is hardfor me to watch is how little
opportunity there is for themillennial generation.
I feel they have gotten the, theraw end of the stick.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
They screwed.
Speaker 3 (44:44):
I was too, there were pathways, there were training
programs.
Now it's, it's sort of the lostgeneration.
And I have to, um, since myparents are on this call, I
can't wait to talk about them.
Um, they, they view sometimesthat generation is not working
hard.
(45:04):
I have people work very hard,but they don't have a track.
And so they're going to have tomake their own way.
They're going to have to be moreto resourceful.
And it's just unfortunate.
I can't imagine coming out ofcollege right now in the economy
that we have.
I mean, everybody is just takinga year off, taking a gap year,
(45:25):
taking a Mulligan.
This is the time.
Okay.
It's it's if I, and I reallyfeel for the, for the
millennials, um,
Speaker 2 (45:34):
Yeah, I've said that consistently, um, in, in regard
to, because my girls are thatage, right.
Um, that what I experienced andyou nailed it, we had a track.
So when I got out of USF, I camehome, I put a bunch of resumes
(45:56):
out there.
I was either going to work forone of the big cosmetic
companies like L'Oreal orMaybelline or something.
And I ended up with working formen and speed stick and baby
magic and all that stuff.
And within the year I have agood friend of mine worked for
Warner-Lambert, which is nowPfizer.
And when I tell you, I had likenine months of experience with
(46:16):
men and then boom, I segwayedover to Warner Lambert.
And let me tell you, theinterview process was, we're
going to be at a hotel.
Connie says, you're great.
You have at least almost a yearunder your belt.
When are you going to graduate?
I said, well, I'm four hoursshort.
I'm going to in Spanish.
I got to take that.
And they're like, we don't care.
Just tell us that, you know,you're going to graduate.
(46:38):
Okay, fine.
Do you want the job likeseriously, but the training and
I'll never forget this.
The training that I had, I hadjust started dating my husband,
Andy, who we went to Boca hightogether.
And he was taking me to theairport.
I was on Eastern airlines.
Did I just date the hell out ofmyself?
Eastern walked into the airportand guess what happened?
(47:00):
Eastern went belly up that day,that moment.
And that's a fly on continental.
I got on the flight and went upfor a week, a week, full week of
training and Morris Plains, NewJersey, and literally did video
presentations because I wascalling on Publix and Ecker
(47:20):
drives and things like that.
And they would not let you gointo the field without that
training.
I don't think anybody gets thatkind of training anymore.
I mean, this was, uh,incredible.
And then the other thing is themillennials are having to rely
on purchasing courses, whichthat's why that's boomed like
these online courses, onlineinfluencers who are teaching you
(47:41):
how to use canvas, how to buildlight rooms, how to have a sales
funnel so that they can, youknow, learn how to have this
secondary income, the gigeconomy, because there's nothing
out there for them to learnthis.
So you're spot on with thatBecky spot on
Speaker 3 (47:58):
Flip side, uh, being on a track, I felt like I had to
graduate college.
I was going into finance to getto the next level.
I had to get an MBA.
And I am seeing people go rightinto Google.
I'm seeing people go right intoall of the tech companies
without that background, withouthaving to do that slog.
(48:20):
And I'm sort of jealous,
Speaker 2 (48:22):
I'm so jealous.
Speaker 3 (48:26):
I was able to use the MBA and at that time I needed
it.
Um, but that that's the flipside is he can really just go
straight into something.
Um, you know, the sky's thelimit.
Um, and my advice in people who,for young people that do get
into corporate jobs is, youknow, stick with it for a couple
(48:47):
of years.
Don't be out of there in a year,you know, try and learn what you
can.
But I w I will say, just from myexperience, if you, um, have a
boss that's holding you back, orthat's limiting you, um, and
sometimes unfortunately, it'swomen will limit other women.
(49:07):
And for sure, there's a Harvardbusiness school, uh, paper on
that called the queen bee effectand will feel threatened.
Um, and I, you know, by youngerwomen who were pretty and, you
know, we're in the, in theworkforce and, and, uh, they
keep them down.
If you're working for a queenbee, you got to try and get out
(49:27):
of that situation.
Maneuver.
If you're in a corporate world,you've got to maneuver to get
the good boss.
That's going to advocate foryou, just like in the
independent contractor world,you've got champions.
Um, if you cannot maneuver insome places you can't, um, then
it's time to look at, um, movingon and the right recognizes your
(49:51):
value and uses your skillsetproperly is going to profit from
you.
And we're going to want to keepyou happy.
And there's no sense in beingunhappy at a place because the
corporations do lay people off.
Now they're not a set deal.
(50:13):
Okay.
I'll go through a couple ofyears where I'm unhappy, but I'm
just using them as an example,but Procter and gamble, they're
going to take care of me.
I'm going to have a pension andI'm going to have great health
insurance, and it's okay.
And we're all a family.
And that really, that loyalty isjust not there anymore.
So, you know,
Speaker 2 (50:31):
Really not there at almost any of the companies.
I mean, I think it's great to beloyal to a company until it's
not great.
And that's kind of how I makedecisions now.
It's like, I just made adecision to change companies,
subs with a fairly largecompany, great run, um, great
company.
(50:53):
But sometimes you just go whenit's not working, it's not
working and you can only makesomething work for so long.
And then you gotta, you gotta,you gotta move on, you know,
and, and back to your pointabout queen bee, Oh, that
happens at my age still.
And, and, you know, you just getto a point where you're like,
(51:14):
are you kidding me?
Get over it?
You know?
I mean, I like to think I'm apretty nice person, but I have
absolutely dealt with the queenbees throughout my entire
career.
And, um, even in the nonprofitspace, you know, there's this
new ring.
Okay.
You can run the show.
I don't care.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
I've heard, I have friends in the nonprofit space
and between that and academics.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
Oh, for God's sake, it's ridic.
It's ridiculous.
And speaking of you brought upJeff basis, cause we're going to
wrap up here.
Um, I read, and I think I postedit that his ex-wife and I can't
remember her first name.
It's Mackenzie, Scott it'sMcKenzie.
Scott has donated more with whatshe received in her settlement
(52:05):
than he has.
So I'm like, there you go.
That's the way to do it.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
One of the things that I wanted to talk about is
women are having a lot morewealth or heiresses to fortunes
and running the companies.
And so women have wealth now andthe game, the balance has
shifted.
And even if you look in the listof billionaires, the amount of
(52:30):
billionaires that come up thatare women are astounding.
They're really almost there.
They're at least a third of thebillionaire's list and they're
running companies and they aredoing,
Speaker 2 (52:42):
But I just, I love like I'm looking forward to the
Oprah interview on Sunday ofdating this, this, uh, interview
with Megan and Harry.
It's going to be veryfascinating because obviously
I'd love to know what he'sleaving behind, but, you know,
it's, it's like, you don't knowwhat you don't know, and nobody
(53:05):
knows what's going on behind thescenes with anybody, with your
money, with what's going onbehind the scenes.
And like you said, the creditcard millionaires.
I mean, that's been going ondown here for forever.
And, um, you know, you just kindof have to laugh.
I, I mentioned this, I was doingan interview with ENS, um,
Garcia who has ism.com.
(53:26):
And she's a, she's a fantasticrealtor, but she specializes in
these unique architecturalproperties, uh, down there that
are significant, like the olddeco properties and things like
that.
But, um, so I've been watchingMiami vice and, uh, I saw an old
Don Johnson interview, uh, fromprobably a couple of years ago.
And, you know, he did very wellwith Miami vice.
(53:49):
Um, wouldn't say he's like, youknow, uh, crazy billionaire
person, but the interviewer wasvery funny about what she said
to him, which is like, you don'tseem like you've changed that
much from that person thatdidn't have the fame and the
wealth to the personnel.
He was like, yeah, I don'tunderstand people like that.
(54:11):
And I thought, that's that's Ilove that.
Like that to me was like theperfect thing to say.
And I thought, wow, I wish morepeople were like that because
you do see how that changes.
And, um, it's interesting how alittle bit of money can really
change somebody.
And so, um, I've reallyappreciate everything that
(54:32):
you've shared today.
I'm sure my audience is going tohave questions.
They can certainly DM you here.
Um, this will be on the podcast,so focus stories, and it will be
, um, on YouTube at some point.
And, um, tell everybody wherethey can reach out to you and
connect with you.
Speaker 3 (54:51):
Sure.
If you, so my name is BeckyLightman and my company is
Lightman capital, and you can goonto Lightman capital.com.
And, uh, it's L I G H T M a N.
And you'll see all of my contactinformation there.
You can DM me here at Beck light, and, uh, it's just been a
(55:13):
pleasure to be asked to be onyour program, but also I enjoyed
the conversation.
It's always fun to hear aboutdifferent industries.
It's very interesting to hearabout real estate in Florida
right now.
So very topical,
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Well, your perspective is fresh.
And I think it's something thata lot of people have been
wanting to hear.
They don't know who to talk to.
And I think you've given someoversight that will hopefully
allow some of the peoplewatching and listening to say,
okay, it's time for me to makesome changes.
(55:48):
Um, this is, this is what I needto do.
And maybe they'll reach out toyou and you'll be able to guide
them.
And I certainly am happy torefer anybody to you as well.
This has been so much fun and Iappreciate your time today.
Happy, happy, happy, happy timesfor all coming soon.
(56:08):
All right, guys, thanks forjoining us today.
And thanks Becky for coming onthe show.
We will see you soon.
Great bye.
Hi, thanks again for joining metoday with this week's episode
of stove, focus
Speaker 1 (56:24):
Stories, if you would like to be considered for an
interview or would like tosponsor the show and blog,
please feel free to reach out tome.
The link is in the show notes.
I hope you have an amazing week.
Hey, Hey everyone.
It's Michelle Baldessari, yourhost to civil good stories in
conjunction with so boca.com andat so Boca on Instagram.
So glad you're here today.
This podcast is all about BocaRaton and being local.
I love interviewing localbusiness owners, folks that are
involved with the nonprofits,things that are happening around
(00:22):
town, places to go and things tosee.
So I'm so happy you're heretoday.
I hope you enjoy this week'sepisode and if you're so
inclined, please make sure tosubscribe to the podcast.
I so appreciate it.
And if you would like to beinterviewed for the show, just
reach out to me.
Everything is in the show notes.
Have a great day.
(00:44):
This episode of so bogus storiesis brought to you by Ms.
Chavela, sorry, with real brokerLLC, serving your real estate
needs and beautiful book fortone and sunny South Florida.
If you have a referral for realestate, please think of me, Ms.
Shelby.
Speaker 2 (01:01):
Hey everyone.
So I'm so excited about doingthis.
Um, I'm going to introduce myguest, who I met recently at a
fantastic group.
And I'll talk about that.
So we're just going to do aquick smile.
Then we get the thumbnailanother quick tip for everybody.
Okay guys, I'm Michelle, Balzsorry.
(01:22):
I'm hashtags.
So Boca, many of you know me,some of you don't, some of you
are new to my Instagram viaclubhouse.
How much fun are we having overthere?
I met Becky Lightman.
Who's the founder of Lightmancapital wealth management firm
based here in Boca about when Ithink at the end of January at
fem city, which is a fantasticwomen's group here in Boca.
(01:45):
Um, my daughter is doing thephotography.
I am a member now under, uh, soBoca, but also my new real
estate firm that I just joinedreal broker, LLC, Becky advises
clients on all aspects of theirwealth management strategy,
including investments forretirement planning and complex
trust and estate services.
(02:06):
I deal with some probate in myreal estate world.
She helps clients navigate theirinvestment options as they face
life decisions.
As a result has a lot of realworld experience and trust me,
she did the most fantastic, uh,talk for our group.
And I sit back, you've got tocome on because one, I thought,
well, I told you I was like, fangirling.
(02:27):
You out that day.
I was like, this is normal, goodinformation for anyone, um, who
is investing.
Who's looking at their wealthmanagement strategy and who
wants to understand what theiroptions are.
So welcome to.
So Boca stories, thank you somuch for having me.
(02:49):
It's great to be here.
Yeah, I, um, I love what we'regoing to talk about today
because I'm a mom andmillennials.
You've obviously met Holly, mydaughter, and we talk about
these things.
I am very transparent, um, aboutthe fact that, uh, we went
through that housing marketcrash, uh, back in the mid two
(03:11):
thousands.
My husband had an accident in2010 and our house went into
foreclosure and it was a scary,scary time.
We were able to get through thatand get it out of foreclosure.
But when you're financiallyfeeling strapped and unstable
and insecure, you make decisionson, I think things that you
(03:34):
normally would not make.
So I thought we could talk alittle bit about that today, and
then I have some, some greatquestions for you.
So why don't you tell everybodya little bit about yourself and,
um, we're very casual here onthis, um, interview.
So Becky Lightman,
Speaker 3 (03:51):
All right, well, uh, I live in Delray beach.
Um, so even though I'm joiningso Boca, I'm hearing I'm in Del
Ray about five miles away.
Um, I have been managing moneyfor a little over actually a lot
over a decade.
Um, and I started in moneymanagement back in 2008 during
(04:12):
the financial crisis, which wasan interesting time to start,
but I have been in wealthmanagement specifically.
Um, since that time helpingwealthy families, um, plan and
have, uh, life events that theyneed decisions, helping them
with decisions, helping them,um, navigate turbulent financial
(04:36):
times as well as good financialtimes.
So, um, in terms of the types ofclients that I've worked with,
um, uh, when I started in thebusiness, I worked with people
who had over$10 million toinvest.
That's just to invest so veryhigh net worth people.
(04:56):
And in the course of my business, um, I began at JP Morgan
private bank.
I went on to, uh, work at creditSwiss managing portfolios there
with my own clientele.
Then I moved to Northern trustand I worked in the global
family office group.
That group is dedicated towardthe ultra ultra high net worth
people that have people aroundthem.
(05:17):
So we're talking, Sentamillionaires billionaires, so
that's a whole other ball game.
Um, but in the process, I reallyhelped people.
People are people.
And at the end of the day, itdoesn't matter how much money
you have.
It's are you happy?
Are you making good decisions?
Are you getting the most, youcan out of your money.
(05:39):
And so it doesn't matter whetherit's someone just starting out
or someone who is very wealthy,everyone faces life decisions.
And, um, I really view my job aspart psychologist in terms of
telling people, um, that they'redoing okay, that they need to
stay according to the plan andnot get upset or, uh, super
(06:03):
nervous when in the, um, invitein the market climate.
Um, but it's also a lot ofpeople wondering, is this
normal?
Am I doing my kids?
How much is too much to givethem, um, so that they don't
feel like they need to go outand, and do, uh, you know,
(06:25):
squander the money, but they,they feel like they need to go
out and be productive members ofsociety.
And so there's a lot of, um, iswhat I'm doing normal.
And there's been a lot of, um,change in the sense of time that
I started in the business, a lotof new regulation.
And I also think it's, um,exciting that, you know, when I,
(06:50):
I chose to go out on my own inthis business, because I believe
there's a real need for womenwho do this and why women.
Um, I don't think, um, I, in myexperience approaching clients
with empathy and trying to putyourself in their shoes, rather
(07:10):
than telling them what to do,makes all the difference in the
world for my clients.
And as an approach, I do thinkthere are a lot of men and women
that feel more comfortablehaving a woman advisor.
So it was very important, um,for me to have that ownership of
the firm and be able to controlthe direction of, of the firm.
(07:33):
So that's, that's the brief, uh,explanation of that.
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
And I think that was one of the things that, uh, when
Allie and I saw you speak and wewere talking about it on the way
home.
And I said, you know, it's, it'sreally nice to see, you know, a
woman, uh, financial planner.
I know there are other ones, but, um, the way that you spoke
about what you do, how youassist the empathy that you
(07:58):
have, and some of the storiesthat you shared in particular
about women who lifecircumstances change, because
they're not familiar with thefinancials of their home or
someone else's handling it forthem.
And then there is a life eventand all of a sudden that is a
major, major deal.
Um, that, that was huge.
(08:20):
And I think the entire room,which we were social distance
went like, Oh my God, could thathappen to me?
That was, I think, I think youthrew such a good aha.
Like I need to soft check here.
So I appreciate that very, verymuch you have worked with, um,
(08:41):
multimillionaires andbillionaires.
What do you find are the traitsthat they all have in common in
regard to wealth and wealthstrategies?
Speaker 3 (08:50):
Yeah.
So this is one of the funnythings, because I've worked with
every one from basketballplayers to go first to, um,
lottery winners, which are someof the most fascinating work
with.
Um, and so people come in totheir money, all different kinds
of ways.
And there are some people thathave just inherit money that
(09:13):
will always be, you know, forlack of a better term, you know,
not productive and just livingon that money.
Um, some people might use theterm trust fund babies by and
large.
That's not who I've worked with.
I have not seen a lot of that.
Um, I think it's reallyinteresting.
Some of the traits that verywealthy people have, um, we
(09:34):
forget that they are people too,and they came a lot of them.
They are self-made.
And so I thought you would get akick out of some of the things
that I have noticed that a lotof people have in common that
wouldn't have won enough thoughtof.
So the biggest thing, when a lotof people who made and created
(09:55):
the wealth were told at somepoint that they weren't good
enough that they couldn't makeit, that there were some
achievement that they didn'tattain and they got fixated on
proving their worth and provingthemselves.
(10:15):
And I, I noticed every one who'sreally been successful has
something that was a setbackthat they were trying to make up
for.
And a very good example of thatwould be Warren buffet.
He obviously is very, uh, anincredibly, um, skilled, uh,
(10:39):
stock picker and investmentmanager.
But in when he was in his teens,he was dead set on going to
Harvard.
And he figured it was, he was ashoe in, it was going to get in.
And, uh, then he got rejectedand he was devastated.
(10:59):
He even told people, um, he hadbeen telling people, I'll see
you at Harvard.
Um, he was that certain it wasgoing to get in.
And when he got that rejection,he basically will still say that
that rejection was a pivot pointin his entire life.
And I also noticed some of thatwhen people, um, who are don't
(11:26):
have educational credentialslike others, um, decide, and
we're talking people that nevergraduated high school, um, they
want to go out and provethemselves to the world too.
They want to go out and prove,okay, I didn't have a college
degree and look what I've done.
Um, that, um, that encouragementfrom having something wrong
(11:51):
happened is super motivator,super motivator.
And so to anyone who has hadthat happen or been told, no,
um, use it to your advantage.
You know,
Speaker 2 (12:04):
It's very interesting scenario.
It's like, almost like you wantto say, okay, I'll show you,
this is what I'm going to do,and this is why I'm going to do
it.
And it's a self motivational, Iguess, trait.
And I love hearing those kindsof stories because we do.
And, and for those of you thatdon't live where we live.
(12:27):
Um, we have a lot of wealth herein South Florida, tremendous
amount of wealth, um, and alsolike in the Naples area, huge
amount of wealth there.
And, and we see differentlevels, I guess is the best way
to put it.
Um, so it's fascinating when youtalk about the self-made, uh,
(12:47):
you know, millionaires,billionaires, and I think you
mentioned a term that I havenever heard S sent, sent
Speaker 3 (12:54):
A millionaire.
People have hundreds of millionsof dollars.
Speaker 2 (12:56):
Oh my God.
I had no idea.
There was even a term good toknow.
So
Speaker 3 (13:00):
Leads me into the next part of our conversation,
which we talked about it, thefem city, um, which is that a
lot of wealthy people.
I mean, we think by allmeasures, you know, you have 25
million, you're doing extremelywell.
They don't view it that way.
A lot of the time are on thehamster wheel.
They're trying to prove to otherpeople that they can do more.
(13:24):
So when you're 20, you're worth25 million, you're hanging out
with people that are worth ahundred million when you're
where the a hundred or 200million are hanging out with
people that are worth 500million.
And you feel poor like a lot,unless you're, um, bill and
Melinda Gates, uh, or Jeff Bezosand his ex wife, you're feeling
(13:45):
poor because you're surroundingyourself with people who have
done it better.
I particularly see this with thepeople of hundreds of millions,
of millions, of dollars, wantingto prove that they can become a
billionaire and they can be 400list.
Um, so that's, again, it's,it's, you know, for all of us,
(14:05):
we would say you're winning thegame of life, right?
They don't feel that way.
And that's still chugging andit's, it's a motivator.
Um, another thing that I noticedwith wealthy people is that a
lot of them got lucky.
They look, you know, part of itwas being in the right place at
(14:26):
the right time and being able to, um, take advantage of an
opportunity that came my way,they, the most humble ones and
the ones that I love to workwith are the ones that readily
admit that.
But there's more to it thanthat.
It's more than getting lucky.
(14:47):
It's the ability to see an andprosecuted on it quickly to make
snap decisions and say, I'mgoing for this.
I'm not going to have anothertime to do this.
And so a lot of what we callliquidity events, where people
come into a lot of money andthey're self-made are people
(15:10):
looking in the eye ofopportunity, realizing it
quickly, not getting to analysisparalysis, Rory, and to get more
money for that opportunity.
You see people able to justtake, look the gift horse in the
mouth and, and go for it.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
You know, it's so interesting.
I just, I have another Instagramaccount that I use for my
training and coaching andspeaking more so for real estate
is at the Michelle B.
And I did a post last nightabout when opportunity knocks
open.
The, and I literally likechanged it because I want it to
be a little more discreet, but Isaid open the, you know, open
(15:48):
the door.
Um, and I, I posted that becauseI, I, myself made a change
recently in real estate firmsand I'm 58.
And I wanted to make a pointthat it doesn't matter how old
you are, opportunities stillcome by.
And if you, if you think toolong or you don't act on it, you
could really lose an opportunitythat could be fun, fabulous, and
(16:12):
profitable.
And so I love that you aresharing this information.
And I think women in particularsometimes are a little more
afraid to, um, act quicklybecause we, we have family
obligations.
We want to run it by somebody.
(16:32):
Sometimes you just have to act.
And so that leads me into mynext question, which is what can
we, as women and people ingeneral do to start building our
wealth, if we're right, youknow, starting over, perhaps
maybe we have a little nest egg,and then what do we do about
protecting it?
Because I work with probateproperties in real estate.
(16:55):
I work with seniors downsize andI work with some divorce
situations.
And a lot of times there areissues with money, um, that is
either not there or somebody'sgot their hands in your pocket
or whatever it is.
So share some thoughts on that.
Becky, if you don't mind.
Speaker 3 (17:13):
First thing that I think of is you're in real
estate and you see people intimes of life transition, see
all the time, and they're havingbabies when they're getting
married and starting a new hometogether when people are getting
divorced and they have to sellthe house, or when someone dies,
(17:34):
this is the same stuff that as awealth manager deals with.
So advice to women is reallysimilar to advice to men.
Um, but sometimes there'sfeeling that, um, I can't do
this or I'm not certain.
(17:55):
So everybody is the same.
And I'm, I've always loved thatwhen someone doesn't speak to me
differently, because I'm awoman, this is the advice for
everybody, and you should do it.
Um, siphoned off maps out your401ks.
If you are lucky enough to workwith an employer that will match
(18:16):
just max it out, just take itoff the top, get that done,
because that is that's moneythat you, you won't see and just
don't raid the 401k.
Either try to make that out ofyour mind, something that you
never, um, touch.
Um, and there's ways if you'renot with a company anymore, that
(18:37):
you can roll those over andtreat them as IRAs.
Um, they're called rolloverIRAs, but that's how you get the
401ks out.
So I would say maxing that outretirement planning is a big
thing that a lot of people justaren't focused on because
they're spending, spending,spending one of the difficulties
about being in South Florida isthe keeping up with the Joneses.
(19:00):
And that is men as much as womenguys, you know,
Speaker 2 (19:06):
It's a, it's pretty obnoxious.
Let's just call it what it is.
It's pretty bad.
And the stress that it causespeople is huge and they don't
talk about it, but the rightschool, the right car, your
diamond bring isn't big enough.
I mean, there's so many thingswe could talk about in regard to
that
Speaker 3 (19:24):
And advice to anyone, don't be the credit card
millionaire.
Um, I call a lot of SouthFlorida.
A lot of people have beenrecommended to me and I have
account minimums and theirfriends say there, there were so
much money that travel all overthe world.
Um, they drive very fancy carsand really there's no savings
there.
There's no nasty.
(19:45):
So I would say build a nest egg,put money aside with every
paycheck.
If you can get it taken outbefore it hits your bank account
and get an invested and get itinvested.
And don't worry about thetiming.
Um, if you are, if you're inyour mid sixties and your
seventies, and you feel likeyou're going to be drawing on
(20:06):
that money, then you might havesome more short term
investments.
But my advice to everyone isjust regularly do what's called
dollar cost averaging, get intothe market and don't leave it
don't sell when the market'slow.
Um, um, the best thing to do isstay in the seat and that's,
it's the job of a good planner,get a position in place, get a
(20:29):
plan in place, and then executeon that planet, stay in the
seat.
That's the best thing you cando.
Um, so that's,
Speaker 2 (20:36):
So one of the questions that I had asked you
because I am a realtor and, um,real estate investment is part
of my world.
Um, and I get asked this, whichyou probably do too all the
time, which is how's the market.
Should I be investing?
Should I be wholesalingflipping?
What kind of real estate shouldI be doing?
(20:57):
Obviously right now we have somany people coming from the
Northeast due to high taxes,high property taxes.
And then of course we're a nostate income tax state here in
Florida.
So it's a very desirable fromthat perspective place to come
along with, we have amazingweather and our lifestyle here
(21:19):
is bar none.
Fantastic.
I mean, I don't know.
I mean really, maybe California,but that's a whole other issue
over there.
They're coming here now.
Right.
Um, so talk a little bit aboutreal estate and, and your
thoughts on that.
And I know that you started yourcareer during the housing crash,
(21:39):
which presented opportunitiesjust like COVID did, as horrible
as this has been.
And I had COVID mid-summer itwas horrible.
So I really do not take anythingthat's gone on, uh, during this
time lightly.
Um, but there were some momentsof clarity for me, and also some
(22:06):
positives during this entiretime.
Surprisingly, one of which wasthe real estate market did not
crash.
We literally, I think everyrealtor in South Florida exactly
one year ago, basically, right.
Went, Oh, what are we going todo?
I mean, that really was it like,Oh my God, here we go.
(22:29):
Again, many of us had gonethrough that.
Hasn't crashed and you literallyare like, Oh my God.
And here we are, and this is thecraziest market.
It's busy, multiple offers onproperties and who would have
thought, so I'd love for you toshare your insight with our
(22:49):
audience today.
Speaker 3 (22:52):
Um, all of those things are so true.
Um, we're in a total housing andbuilding boom.
I was actually worried aboutdoing this Instagram cause
there's four houses that are bymy driveway being constructed on
it.
Boom.
Yeah,
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Yeah.
Don't worry about it.
My dogs will bark any minute.
Speaker 3 (23:11):
I know I'm always thought as a wealth manager that
you need real estate andmarketable investments and
liquid investments that areinvested in the stock markets.
Um, I've always think thoughtthat they're complimentary and
you really need to have both.
And to the extent that, um, youcan get into a home that you own
(23:37):
or condominium that is reallyimportant now in a situation
like this, where there's offersmulti and cash offers in sight
unseen.
I don't know what to tellpeople.
I know you can't time.
The investment markets.
I, I think there's a lot ofcyclicality to the building
(24:00):
markets and, but I just don'tknow how to time it.
I, I think this wave of NewYork, New Jersey, Connecticut,
uh, Vermont, it's all comingdown, it's continuing and it
could just be, Hey, get inparticipate, stretch.
I will tell you that everyfirst-time home buyer, it feels
(24:23):
like a stretch.
I know horrible in the firstyear, especially because you're
not sure if you overpaid, you'renot sure you may not be able to
furnish the house.
Um, and you feel just very cashpoor, but it's almost stretch.
Um, and right now the stretchfor the way that these, um,
(24:47):
houses are priced.
I mean, you know, things thatwere 400 or 500,000 year and a
half ago are closer to 800 or900,000, but you've got to pay
to play.
And hopefully the market valuesjust continue to go up.
Speaker 2 (25:03):
One of the things that I am seeing too, is our
friends from up North are havingsticker shock.
They are coming here and they'relooking online and they're
saying, this is a milliondollars, that's it?
And I'm like, I know you'regoing to have to make the
decision that you're going toget what you need to get to get
(25:26):
out because that's what theywant to do.
And look at all the otherpositives.
And you may not have the biggesthouse on the block.
You may not have the same sizehouse that you have up North.
Um, but you've got to look atthe other reasons that you're
here.
And then maybe in a coupleyears, you upsize, if that is
your jam, you know, um, and it'sa shock when I talk to people
(25:51):
and I looked at houses with someclients recently and they're
surprised.
So
Speaker 3 (25:57):
What would be your advice to people looking at
purchasing homes right now?
What are you telling them?
Speaker 2 (26:04):
First thing is, um, if you love something and it
hits most of your, you know,boxes, make the offer and make
it your highest and best offerbecause you're, you know, we
have multiple offers oneverything don't waive your
inspections, do not waive yourinspections.
If you need to do a two dayinspection, then do a two day
(26:27):
inspection.
I would feel very uncomfortableagreeing with a buyer to do that
because you just never know.
So, you know, at some pointthough, when it's happening is
they're having to remove thecontingency just to be
competitive.
And that's how this market is.
(26:48):
That's a little scary.
Um, but it is what it is,
Speaker 3 (26:54):
No inspections.
And our people get then going onthe other side and getting
mortgages like cash outrefinances.
Speaker 2 (27:04):
Yeah.
Some of the people are doingthat.
Also a lot of cash right now,like cash purchases.
And of course, sellers love cashpurchases because there's no
appraisal contingency typically.
So lender, lenders notrequesting it.
So that's a little reminiscentof the housing boom that we
(27:25):
experienced before.
And that is a risk that you'regoing to take that could you end
up being upside down at somepoint, maybe who knows?
It's hard to say nobody has acrystal ball.
Um, but I'm, I'm a firm believerthat, um, if you can get some
sort of inspection, get one,like one onesy twosy, like just
(27:45):
get in there, make sure there'snothing serious, like mold, it's
the big stuff, mold, roof AC.
You want to know.
Speaker 3 (27:55):
Now, one of the things we talked about privately
and aside when I spoke was how,um, real estate is the great
equalizer in a lot of ways forwomen.
I mean, we've all heard of thecorporate world being paid less
than men.
Goodness knows it's happened tome.
It's happened to me.
(28:15):
I know you can't get away fromthat.
What a spirit you can own.
Anything privately.
No one has to know you run itbest men or you flip it.
Is there any bit of thatinequality in real estate or do
you think that's a great playfor people who are, who have the
neck for it?
Speaker 2 (28:34):
I think it's a play.
I love it.
It's something that I, um, wantto do more of this year and
continue because I do like itand I do feel, um, it is a great
equalizer and you're right.
You know, not everybody needs toshout to the world how rich they
are, you know, and I think it'sall about being comfortable.
(28:59):
What makes, so, you know, yousee realtors, you know, putting
out there that they sell thingsand this is what they've done.
And at the same time, um, isthat it's an it's important to
them.
Of course.
And it's important to me, likeif I have a really significant
sale, I do want to share that.
I think people want to see thatyou're successful and you're
(29:19):
active in it.
But at some point, when does itstop really being that important
and you know, you know what youneed to live the life that you
want, like that if$150,000, youknow, is cool for you and that
makes you happy and that letsyou do what all the things you
want to do fine.
If 60,000 does, that's fine.
(29:42):
You know, like there's no rhymeor reason, right.
It's really, I think what makesyou happy?
And you talked about these highhigh-end clients that you've
worked with and you know, andthe happiness piece of it.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Right.
Right.
And I will say a lot of, um,what I've seen and this is, you
know, a lot of people, thewealth is not their sense of
purpose.
It's what they're doing.
It's what they enjoy doing.
And they get a charge out ofthat.
And, and, and if you, you know,at some point you have enough
(30:19):
money, have enough money, uh, itmakes your life more
comfortable, happier.
Um, and there's actually beenstudies that over a certain
amount of wealth, people are nohappier.
And actually that, that wealthnumber is around$270,000 to give
(30:40):
you an idea.
Speaker 2 (30:41):
Well, there you go.
And you know, we have a lot ofrealtors that are watching right
now, and I can tell you that todo six figures in real estate is
really not that difficult, butironically, the average income
of realtors under 40,000 a year,I've heard, it's a shock.
It's a shock when you reallyhear that.
Um, and of course price pointcomes into play.
(31:02):
So you may have to do moretransactions if you're in an
area with the lower price point,but if you're in an area like
this and you study your careerand you know, you've been
mentored and you know whatyou're doing, you should be able
to hit at least a low sixfigure, a hundred thousand, you
know, with what you're doing.
Um, but that's a reallyinteresting number 270,000.
(31:25):
I, I really had no idea and I'msure people watching and
listening wouldn't even thinkthat most people think, well,
you know, if I have a millionI'm happy, but you're right.
That's fantastic.
I love hearing that kind of stat.
Speaker 3 (31:40):
Um, you know, one of the things that we talked about
and I spoke about it, thelunches, um, being careful who
you give money to, um, and howyou can easily part with your
money, if you're not beingcareful.
And I thought it would be verygood to talk about a couple of
(32:01):
cases, cases are always moreinteresting cases or give you a
sense of the real people behindit.
So, uh, first example, um, whenI started in this, um, in this
business a very first week, Imet with some people who had won
the lottery.
Um, they were up in New York.
(32:21):
Uh, gosh, I forget how much theywon.
Probably at least 150 millionafter taxes.
And they, um, they didn't evengo home to their neighborhood
that night when they got thewinning ticket.
And they saw that they had won.
They didn't go back.
(32:42):
That's how bad theirneighborhood was in New York.
And, uh, they were justfantastic people, very, uh,
generous.
And they gave a lot of money too.
So that 150 million in aboutfive years' time was down to 30
(33:04):
million.
Oh my gosh.
And what did they do?
They did a lot of things.
They gave a lot of money tofamily members and they built a
lot of, they got a lot ofhouses.
They got the cars, they did allof that.
I didn't really invest themoney.
They just spent it down.
(33:25):
Um, one of the biggest thingsthat they ran into trouble with
us, they wanted to give back totheir church and they gave their
pastor, um,$8 million to go tothe church.
And that pastor left a country.
(33:45):
He absconded, he was, um, andhere these people were trying to
do something good.
And I'm not saying by any meansthat you shouldn't give money to
your church or your temple.
I'm saying this was an exampleof giving money to a bad person
that meant ill.
That was not, and, and reallytripped them because they had
(34:06):
trust.
So you have to be reallythoughtful about you giving
money.
Another, a very good example ofgiving a lot of money, um, and
not having it go your way iswhen Mark Zuckerberg made a huge
donation to the New Jerseyschool system, but he didn't
really have a plan.
It wasn't a foundation, it was abit of a mess and it didn't
(34:29):
achieve what he wanted it to.
And that is, you know, so hehe's been vocal about, he, you
need a plan.
If you're being philanthropic,you need to make sure the money
goes to the right place.
Talk about family members for aminute.
Family members are wonderful andwe love them and we want to help
them.
(34:50):
But everybody has had a familymember that just no matter what
they get, it's gone.
And they, they really can't saveurgency after the next.
And there's not much you can do.
So I was working with, um, abasketball player and a very
large family, and they werealways asking for, for money.
(35:15):
And he didn't know initiallywhat to do.
And an aunt that asked him formoney to, um, replace her roof
was$29,000.
And of course he said, sure, heto replace your roof.
Um, and he gave her the moneydirectly.
So the next time you went to herhouse, there was no new roof.
(35:40):
There was nothing.
And he felt so low in thatmoment.
He felt so betrayed.
Um, it hadn't been used, hedidn't know how it had been
used.
Um, so, you know, giving loansto those family members that are
not responsible, you may as wellsay goodbye to the money, if
(36:04):
you're okay with that.
So be it, but don't expect toget that money back.
It's really a gift.
Um, and there's giftingstrategies.
You can give up to$15,000 everyyear, um, to, to people, um, and
not have any kind of gift tapsor, you know, there's, there's
ways to do this.
But what he did was prettyinteresting.
(36:26):
He set up his own, uh, familyfoundation, not really
foundation in that he requiredwas required to spend anything
and it wasn't charitable, but hebasically set up the structure
for the whole family and said,I'm only giving$10,000 a year to
you guys.
And what you want to do withthat, it's gotta be toward
(36:50):
education or some sort of, youknow, causes that he had laid
out in advance when he put upthat gate, that was when things
normalized for him.
And he felt he was able to givemoney.
So instead of giving to the aunt, pay the roofer, he paid
directly instead of giving to anuncle to pay for their
(37:14):
children's education, they cutchecks to the school directly,
or he bought the backpacks orthe school supplies directly.
Was it an extra hassle?
Yes, but it made sure the moneywent to the right place.
And there are so many peopleknocking on your door when
(37:35):
you're a professional athlete.
And one of the things that wedeal with as wealth managers,
when we're working with them isthe posse.
The posse could be like 10people that are trusted advisors
that are surrounding the person.
And it can get overwhelming whenyou're talking to people about
their money, because all ofthose people, a lot of them
(37:57):
anyway, have their hands out forthat money.
So when you're dealing withprofessional athletes, um, it's
so much about trusting the rightpeople.
And LeBron, James is a terrificexample of someone who's done
this very well.
His, um, his family officemanager, who's like one of his
best friends from high schooland he's kept it really tight.
(38:19):
He trusts him and theysurrounded himself with good
advisors with lottery winnersthat I was talking about
earlier, got into trouble, isthey, their brother was an
accountant.
He was a CPA.
So they gave the money to do thetax returns.
And he did on a tax software,which you really can't do for
(38:42):
such a large, um, family.
And there was an IRS tax penaltyof$4 million as a result.
So surrounding yourself withgood advisers is so important.
If you have someone like you forreal estate, like me, for wealth
management, we're going to helpyou get that team to help you
get the right CPAs.
(39:03):
We're going to make sure youdon't invest in things like
Madoff.
We're going to make sure thatyou are covered and that your,
everything is on the up and upin quite frankly, in South
Florida, you know, people areeasily parted with their money
by hearing about stock picks or,you know, sort of investment
funds on the golf course.
(39:23):
And there's very little vettingof those investments.
It's you really need goodadvisors in place.
And, um,
Speaker 2 (39:31):
And you know, I will tell you, and this was back in
2011, I think it was.
And, um, I had a referral for abuyer whose family members lost
money through Maydoff.
And so, you know, you kind ofsix degrees of separation.
And then I saw on, I think itwas the today show, uh, Phil
(39:53):
Donahue and Marlo Thomas aredoing this podcast about married
couples.
And a lot of people don't knowthat Kevin bacon and Kyra
Sedgwick lost everything becauseit made off, they lost a huge
amount of their life savingsbecause they, if there was
probably more like a handshakething.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Wink, wink, you know, Oh, wellwe're friends with this person.
(40:14):
Oh yeah.
He's a great guy.
And you know, when you watchthis series, um, there's a
couple of movies about it, andthat was pretty much how he did
that, you know?
And, and I think that you bringup some good points with the
athletes and some of the thingsthat they're doing or could be
doing, um, when it comes tostarting out, for example, you
(40:34):
met my daughter, um, she's 25and my other daughter's 30.
Um, my other daughter works foran airline is she is getting
matching for her four Oh one.
Um, they have done them justextremely well under the
circumstances of, you know, shewas furloughed, but let me tell
you something, they spirit, uh,has done a phenomenal job, uh,
(40:56):
with their employees, likephenomenal.
And she's going back in April,um, and I've always liked the
airline.
So, you know, there you go.
But that piece is really goodfor them, but my other daughter
is an independent contractor.
So for, you know, people thatare starting out independent
contractors, um, who would yourecommend that they reach out
(41:17):
to?
I know, uh, you know, peoplelike yourself sometimes have a
certain, um, criteria in regardto how much money somebody has
before you work with them,because you've been doing things
for a long time.
So, you know, what your criteriais, but what kind of thoughts do
you have on people who arewanting to get started?
Speaker 3 (41:36):
I think, um, you know, I, I have to, the gig
economy is the directioneverything is heading.
So you're, you're, um,independent contractor that
that's what's happening.
That is the new, um, that's thenew economy.
And that's how a lot of peoplehave gotten by, especially in
the pandemic.
(41:58):
Um, I think for, for them, it's,you know, your daughter is a
photographer, right?
So I think it's a matter ofgetting my AirPods connected.
Hold on, am I unconnected on theairplane?
(42:20):
You sound fine.
Okay, go ahead.
Um, so I think for them get, tryto get big clients.
Then it's all about connectionsbecause if you have one or two
big clients, then you aregolden, but if you have a
million small clients, you'regoing to get very distracted.
(42:42):
It's going to be hard.
There's only so many ways youcan get stretched.
Um, so I think for yourdaughter, who's the
photographer.
She's got to get into corporatephotography.
Probably it may not be herpassion, but she's going to be
great clients that are going toneed her for every event.
This puts things in a regularcapacity and for the independent
(43:06):
contractors, but even for a lotof real estate folks, the pay is
so lumpy.
So you've got even an outprepare for the bad times,
trying to get those big clientsin for, for a lot of people
where you've got to be able tohave, um, one or two people in
your back pocket that are goingto refer you.
(43:27):
They're your champions.
They're the people that say, youknow, if you need to talk to a
realtor, I know the woman it'sMichelle.
And you know, if she's, uh, anindependent contractor, she's
got to get that the only way toreally do that is your network
people, the people they know.
(43:48):
And I will tell you that even ineven my case, I work with a lot
of accountants and estateplanning attorneys, and I'll go
to lunch back in normal timesand I'll see them with other
financial advisors and all ofthe financial advisors are
buying them lunch and trying toget their referrals.
Um, I think it's sometimes good,um, to figure out your five
(44:13):
people.
Speaker 2 (44:13):
Yeah.
I say your handful of baby, yourhandful.
So does he
Speaker 3 (44:19):
And those five people are in your corner and they're
going to be referring you.
So anyone who's starting abusiness, I would say that now I
will tell you that what is hardfor me to watch is how little
opportunity there is for themillennial generation.
I feel they have gotten the, theraw end of the stick.
Speaker 2 (44:42):
They screwed.
Speaker 3 (44:44):
I was too, there were pathways, there were training
programs.
Now it's, it's sort of the lostgeneration.
And I have to, um, since myparents are on this call, I
can't wait to talk about them.
Um, they, they view sometimesthat generation is not working
hard.
(45:04):
I have people work very hard,but they don't have a track.
And so they're going to have tomake their own way.
They're going to have to be moreto resourceful.
And it's just unfortunate.
I can't imagine coming out ofcollege right now in the economy
that we have.
I mean, everybody is just takinga year off, taking a gap year,
(45:25):
taking a Mulligan.
This is the time.
Okay.
It's it's if I, and I reallyfeel for the, for the
millennials, um,
Speaker 2 (45:34):
Yeah, I've said that consistently, um, in, in regard
to, because my girls are thatage, right.
Um, that what I experienced andyou nailed it, we had a track.
So when I got out of USF, I camehome, I put a bunch of resumes
(45:56):
out there.
I was either going to work forone of the big cosmetic
companies like L'Oreal orMaybelline or something.
And I ended up with working formen and speed stick and baby
magic and all that stuff.
And within the year I have agood friend of mine worked for
Warner-Lambert, which is nowPfizer.
And when I tell you, I had likenine months of experience with
(46:16):
men and then boom, I segwayedover to Warner Lambert.
And let me tell you, theinterview process was, we're
going to be at a hotel.
Connie says, you're great.
You have at least almost a yearunder your belt.
When are you going to graduate?
I said, well, I'm four hoursshort.
I'm going to in Spanish.
I got to take that.
And they're like, we don't care.
Just tell us that, you know,you're going to graduate.
(46:38):
Okay, fine.
Do you want the job likeseriously, but the training and
I'll never forget this.
The training that I had, I hadjust started dating my husband,
Andy, who we went to Boca hightogether.
And he was taking me to theairport.
I was on Eastern airlines.
Did I just date the hell out ofmyself?
Eastern walked into the airportand guess what happened?
(47:00):
Eastern went belly up that day,that moment.
And that's a fly on continental.
I got on the flight and went upfor a week, a week, full week of
training and Morris Plains, NewJersey, and literally did video
presentations because I wascalling on Publix and Ecker
(47:20):
drives and things like that.
And they would not let you gointo the field without that
training.
I don't think anybody gets thatkind of training anymore.
I mean, this was, uh,incredible.
And then the other thing is themillennials are having to rely
on purchasing courses, whichthat's why that's boomed like
these online courses, onlineinfluencers who are teaching you
(47:41):
how to use canvas, how to buildlight rooms, how to have a sales
funnel so that they can, youknow, learn how to have this
secondary income, the gigeconomy, because there's nothing
out there for them to learnthis.
So you're spot on with thatBecky spot on
Speaker 3 (47:58):
Flip side, uh, being on a track, I felt like I had to
graduate college.
I was going into finance to getto the next level.
I had to get an MBA.
And I am seeing people go rightinto Google.
I'm seeing people go right intoall of the tech companies
without that background, withouthaving to do that slog.
(48:20):
And I'm sort of jealous,
Speaker 2 (48:22):
I'm so jealous.
Speaker 3 (48:26):
I was able to use the MBA and at that time I needed
it.
Um, but that that's the flipside is he can really just go
straight into something.
Um, you know, the sky's thelimit.
Um, and my advice in people who,for young people that do get
into corporate jobs is, youknow, stick with it for a couple
(48:47):
of years.
Don't be out of there in a year,you know, try and learn what you
can.
But I w I will say, just from myexperience, if you, um, have a
boss that's holding you back, orthat's limiting you, um, and
sometimes unfortunately, it'swomen will limit other women.
(49:07):
And for sure, there's a Harvardbusiness school, uh, paper on
that called the queen bee effectand will feel threatened.
Um, and I, you know, by youngerwomen who were pretty and, you
know, we're in the, in theworkforce and, and, uh, they
keep them down.
If you're working for a queenbee, you got to try and get out
(49:27):
of that situation.
Maneuver.
If you're in a corporate world,you've got to maneuver to get
the good boss.
That's going to advocate foryou, just like in the
independent contractor world,you've got champions.
Um, if you cannot maneuver insome places you can't, um, then
it's time to look at, um, movingon and the right recognizes your
(49:51):
value and uses your skillsetproperly is going to profit from
you.
And we're going to want to keepyou happy.
And there's no sense in beingunhappy at a place because the
corporations do lay people off.
Now they're not a set deal.
(50:13):
Okay.
I'll go through a couple ofyears where I'm unhappy, but I'm
just using them as an example,but Procter and gamble, they're
going to take care of me.
I'm going to have a pension andI'm going to have great health
insurance, and it's okay.
And we're all a family.
And that really, that loyalty isjust not there anymore.
So, you know,
Speaker 2 (50:31):
Really not there at almost any of the companies.
I mean, I think it's great to beloyal to a company until it's
not great.
And that's kind of how I makedecisions now.
It's like, I just made adecision to change companies,
subs with a fairly largecompany, great run, um, great
company.
(50:53):
But sometimes you just go whenit's not working, it's not
working and you can only makesomething work for so long.
And then you gotta, you gotta,you gotta move on, you know,
and, and back to your pointabout queen bee, Oh, that
happens at my age still.
And, and, you know, you just getto a point where you're like,
(51:14):
are you kidding me?
Get over it?
You know?
I mean, I like to think I'm apretty nice person, but I have
absolutely dealt with the queenbees throughout my entire
career.
And, um, even in the nonprofitspace, you know, there's this
new ring.
Okay.
You can run the show.
I don't care.
Speaker 3 (51:35):
I've heard, I have friends in the nonprofit space
and between that and academics.
Speaker 2 (51:40):
Oh, for God's sake, it's ridic.
It's ridiculous.
And speaking of you brought upJeff basis, cause we're going to
wrap up here.
Um, I read, and I think I postedit that his ex-wife and I can't
remember her first name.
It's Mackenzie, Scott it'sMcKenzie.
Scott has donated more with whatshe received in her settlement
(52:05):
than he has.
So I'm like, there you go.
That's the way to do it.
Speaker 3 (52:10):
One of the things that I wanted to talk about is
women are having a lot morewealth or heiresses to fortunes
and running the companies.
And so women have wealth now andthe game, the balance has
shifted.
And even if you look in the listof billionaires, the amount of
(52:30):
billionaires that come up thatare women are astounding.
They're really almost there.
They're at least a third of thebillionaire's list and they're
running companies and they aredoing,
Speaker 2 (52:42):
But I just, I love like I'm looking forward to the
Oprah interview on Sunday ofdating this, this, uh, interview
with Megan and Harry.
It's going to be veryfascinating because obviously
I'd love to know what he'sleaving behind, but, you know,
it's, it's like, you don't knowwhat you don't know, and nobody
(53:05):
knows what's going on behind thescenes with anybody, with your
money, with what's going onbehind the scenes.
And like you said, the creditcard millionaires.
I mean, that's been going ondown here for forever.
And, um, you know, you just kindof have to laugh.
I, I mentioned this, I was doingan interview with ENS, um,
Garcia who has ism.com.
(53:26):
And she's a, she's a fantasticrealtor, but she specializes in
these unique architecturalproperties, uh, down there that
are significant, like the olddeco properties and things like
that.
But, um, so I've been watchingMiami vice and, uh, I saw an old
Don Johnson interview, uh, fromprobably a couple of years ago.
And, you know, he did very wellwith Miami vice.
(53:49):
Um, wouldn't say he's like, youknow, uh, crazy billionaire
person, but the interviewer wasvery funny about what she said
to him, which is like, you don'tseem like you've changed that
much from that person thatdidn't have the fame and the
wealth to the personnel.
He was like, yeah, I don'tunderstand people like that.
(54:11):
And I thought, that's that's Ilove that.
Like that to me was like theperfect thing to say.
And I thought, wow, I wish morepeople were like that because
you do see how that changes.
And, um, it's interesting how alittle bit of money can really
change somebody.
And so, um, I've reallyappreciate everything that
(54:32):
you've shared today.
I'm sure my audience is going tohave questions.
They can certainly DM you here.
Um, this will be on the podcast,so focus stories, and it will be
, um, on YouTube at some point.
And, um, tell everybody wherethey can reach out to you and
connect with you.
Speaker 3 (54:51):
Sure.
If you, so my name is BeckyLightman and my company is
Lightman capital, and you can goonto Lightman capital.com.
And, uh, it's L I G H T M a N.
And you'll see all of my contactinformation there.
You can DM me here at Beck light, and, uh, it's just been a
(55:13):
pleasure to be asked to be onyour program, but also I enjoyed
the conversation.
It's always fun to hear aboutdifferent industries.
It's very interesting to hearabout real estate in Florida
right now.
So very topical,
Speaker 2 (55:27):
Well, your perspective is fresh.
And I think it's something thata lot of people have been
wanting to hear.
They don't know who to talk to.
And I think you've given someoversight that will hopefully
allow some of the peoplewatching and listening to say,
okay, it's time for me to makesome changes.
(55:48):
Um, this is, this is what I needto do.
And maybe they'll reach out toyou and you'll be able to guide
them.
And I certainly am happy torefer anybody to you as well.
This has been so much fun and Iappreciate your time today.
Happy, happy, happy, happy timesfor all coming soon.
(56:08):
All right, guys, thanks forjoining us today.
And thanks Becky for coming onthe show.
We will see you soon.
Great bye.
Hi, thanks again for joining metoday with this week's episode
of stove, focus
Speaker 1 (56:24):
Stories, if you would like to be considered for an
interview or would like tosponsor the show and blog,
please feel free to reach out tome.
The link is in the show notes.
I hope you have an amazing week.
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