October 6, 2025 • 49 mins
Have you ever wondered what it really takes to lead with clarity, courage, and impact, without burning out or losing yourself in the process? In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, we dive deep into that question and explore the real-life challenges and mindset shifts required to build a fulfilling, sustainable leadership journey.
I’m Tim Newman, your host and a recovering college professor turned communication coach. Today, I’m joined by an inspiring guest: Rachael Edmondson-Clarke. Rachael brings an extraordinary wealth of experience from her years as a senior corporate leader to her current role running Elevar, her own leadership consultancy. Over the past decade, she's helped countless high-performing leaders and teams show up bravely, with clarity and authenticity, even in challenging environments. Rachael is also a former regional Vice President and President of the Professional Speaking Association in the UK and Ireland, and a sought-after speaker, coach, and consultant. She’s the perfect person to help us unpack the realities of leadership, personal growth, and balance in a fast-paced world.
In our conversation, Rachael opens up about what it was like climbing the corporate ladder before facing a sudden, life-changing wake-up call—a moment that forced her to reevaluate everything she thought she wanted. She describes the intense pressure of trying to “push through,” the toll it took on her health and relationships, and how it ultimately led to her collapsing in her office. Most importantly, she shares how she rebuilt her life and career from that moment of crisis, moving from survival mode to creating a business that aligns with her values, energy, and mission.
Other highlights include:
- The hidden costs of always being “on” and why biology can’t be outsmarted by mindset alone
- Practical approaches for restoring your energy and avoiding the traps of toxic productivity culture
- How organizational culture and unaddressed emotional needs impact team engagement, trust, and retention
- Tips for effective boundary-setting, especially in meeting-heavy, high-pressure environments
- The importance of honest, direct feedback from mentors and creating an inner circle that pushes you to grow—and how “fierce empathy” is the balance between tough love and real support
- A free tool from Rachael (The Pause) to cut through overwhelm and help you lead from truth, not fear
- Why the real value of personal development isn’t just your own growth, but how you show up as the leader the world needs
If you’re ready to step out of survival mode and into leadership that’s both impactful and sustainable—whether in your organization, your community, or your own household—this episode is packed with insights you’ll want to put into action right away.
As always, you can find resources and Rachael’s free download in the show notes. And don’t forget to grab your free copy of my Top 21 Challenges for Public Speakers, or check out our public speaking course at speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com.
Remember, your voice has power. Use it well, and you can change the world.
Want to be a guest on Speaking With Confidence? Send Tim Newman a message on PodMatch
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Episode Transcript
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Tim Newman (00:10):
Welcome back to Speaking with Confidence.
Podcast that helps you buildthe soft skills that lead to
real results.
Communication, storytelling,public speaking, and showing up
with confidence in everyconversation that counts.
I'm Tim Newman, a recoveringcollege professor turned
communication coach, and I'mthrilled to guide you on your
journey to becoming a powerfulcommunicator.
Today's guest is RachelEdmondson Clark.
(00:32):
Rachel brings a powerful blendof boardroom experience and
entrepreneurial insight.
She is a former senior leaderin the corporate world who spent
the last 10 years running herown leadership consultancy,
Elivar.
She works with high-performingleaders and teams who want to
lead with clarity, courage, andimpact without burning out or
losing who they are in theprocess.
(00:52):
Mrs.
Clark is also the formerregional vice president and
president of the ProfessionalSpeaking Association in the UK
and Ireland and a sought-afterspeaker, coach, and consultant.
Welcome, Rachel.
Rachel, welcome to the show.
I'm really excited to have youand have this conversation.
I've been looking forward to itfor a while.
Rachael Edmondson-Clar (01:11):
Awesome.
I am delighted to be here.
I'm well done with all of mynames.
If we'd actually add it in theDeVinia and Tamara, which are my
middle names, it gets to bequite a mouthful.
Honestly, despite despiteappearances and the double
barreled name, I am not thatpartial.
And I'm definitely, as youprobably hear from the accent,
I'm from a place in uh inEngland called Nottingham or
(01:33):
Nottingham, as we might say.
So yeah, no, very down toearth, Bath and not it's Bath,
not Bath in my house, um,despite all of those names.
Anyway, I'm delighted to behere.
I've been super excited too.
I have um been looking forwardto this since we had our
original planning session forthe show.
Tim Newman (01:53):
And someone I don't know if I told you this, but um
I spent some time in Manchesterand Stockport when I was a kid.
Um when uh when Charles andDiana got married, I was
actually over there.
We uh uh uh we were on alacrosse tour.
So I was I was 13 years old andwe spent probably we probably
(02:14):
spent a month in, you know, myhost family was in Manchester,
and we probably spent a monthtraveling around uh the United
Kingdom playing lacrosse againstdifferent different lacrosse
clubs.
And um I I I vividly rememberthe party that we had at my host
family's house when PrinceCharles and Prince Diana got
married.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (02:33):
Oh my goodness.
1981, I think.
Tim Newman (02:36):
I'm old, Rachel.
I'm old.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (02:39):
1981 they got married.
What?
Oh my goodness.
And Manchester is a wonderful,wonderful city.
I was I was there only a coupleof weeks ago working with one
of my clients, and um, yeah,it's a great city to be in.
I love staying up there whenI'm there.
Um it's really vibrant, lots oflots of good, lots of good
(03:00):
stuff to be said.
And um, and Tim, what I wasalso just saying around just um
it is such a pleasure and such adelight to be here.
You are one of um you are sucha warm-hearted, genuine um host,
and I'm just delighted to havethis conversation with you.
So thank you for having one.
Tim Newman (03:21):
Thank you.
You're making me blush.
I you know, I I'm an introvert,I'm a screaming introvert, and
you know, I you know, I I alwaystry and direct the the the
attention away from me and on tothe guests.
Um I I actually had aconversation yesterday with
somebody, and um he he asked,you know, you know, awards,
(03:42):
this, that, and the other thing,and and I said, look, man, it's
that's not me.
It's not it's not who I am.
I I'm I consider myself aconnector, not a climber, right?
My what I do is I connectpeople to and and help put them
in places for them to besuccessful.
And that I'm very happy doingthat.
I I like doing that.
And and to me, it's it's moreservice and value is what drives
(04:02):
me than any awards or oraccolades or things of that
nature.
So thank you.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (04:08):
No, and it's really clear.
It's really clear from meetingyou and the way that you prepare
and plan and um welcome yourhosts to the show.
So thank you.
Tim Newman (04:19):
Well well, let's talk about you.
Um let's talk about yourjourney.
You know, you and and I thinkthat you know your your journey
really is isn't too uncommon.
You you went you went touniversity, you graduated, and
you started climbing thatcorporate ladder.
And you know, take it fromthere and and walk us through
how you got to where you arenow.
Because I I think is I thinkyour story is really important
(04:42):
for people to understand um somemindset shifts that we we as a
society need to start making.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (04:49):
Of course.
So you're absolutely right.
I thought I was very clear onwhat I wanted.
I went to college, university,I started off in the corporate
world and climbed that ladder tosome senior roles in both sales
and marketing.
And I can still vividlyremember the afternoon that all
(05:13):
of that came crumbling down.
I was in my glass-frontedoffice and I was preparing to go
into the boardroom, and insteadof walking out that door, I
found myself lying on the floor,staring up at the ceiling
tiles.
I had collapsed.
(05:34):
I couldn't think, I couldn'tbreathe in that moment, and it
was a really low and scary,scary moment for me.
Um, and what had led me to thatpoint had been months and if
not even years, of disrespectingmy body, of ignoring the most
(05:59):
important relationships in mylife, and of pushing through
thinking that I knew all themindset stuff.
I knew how to regulate how Iwas feeling, and if I just kept
working harder and harder, or ifI could just get to the next
(06:20):
weekend or through this nextproject, that things would get
better.
And in the end, my body wenttime out.
And I was able to get myself upoff the floor.
I needed to because nobodycould quickly see what had
happened to me.
Um so I I did manage to getenough breath to get me back on,
(06:44):
you know, kind of at least justsat in my in my office.
And I often describe thatmoment a bit like being slapped
around the face with a wetch,you know, kind of like I
remember I remember that it waslike this real realization with
myself, you can't do thisanymore.
Like this is a stop, like thisis an something must change.
(07:09):
And um a day or two after that,I had arranged to speak with my
my director.
Uh, we had a very honestconversation, and uh eventually
we restructured the team, and Iwent instead of heading up the
(07:30):
team, I moved into the team aspart of the team, and I helped
to recruit somebody of with withgreater experience that could
do that role that I had beendoing for the last of 18 months,
two years.
Um and it was that was tough.
That was really tough.
I went from having thatglass-fronted office to moving
(07:52):
out of that glass-fronted.
So all the senior leaders hadthose these glass-fronted off
around a big open plan officefor you know everyone else.
Um, it was just the way thebuilding had been designed.
And I had to, I came out ofthat office and sat back in the
open plan area outside of whathad been my office to watch
someone else walk in, as you canimagine.
(08:14):
That was um that that wastough.
I felt guilt, I felt shame, Ifelt a lot of things.
And over the course of what wasreally about a three-year
period um following that moment,um I really reassessed and
(08:36):
revalued what was most importantto me.
There was another there wasanother moment that I remember
specifically.
I was um getting ready for workone morning and I was stood in
the shower, and it was likethere was a it was like there
was a whisper on my heart that Icouldn't hear or make out what
(08:57):
the whisper was saying.
And I that morning I decided toturn to that whisper inside of
me and go, what what are yousaying?
What are you saying to me?
Let me try and listen, let metry and hear.
And essentially it was saying,You're made for more than this.
(09:18):
And I was like, but what?
But like, but what?
I I don't know what that is.
And although the answer didn'tcome there and then, I remember
stepping out of the shower andmy feet touching the bath mat.
And at that point, I'd made adecision that I no longer wanted
a job or a career, but I wanteda life's mission, a work that I
(09:44):
could feel like I could jumpout of bed for every day.
And that's what I then spentthe next three years kind of
exploring with excitement andpossibility what that could be
and what that could look like,and following my heart and what
was lighting what was lightingme up.
Tim Newman (10:03):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (10:04):
And ultimately that led me to oh
over 10 years ago now, launchingmy business, Elevar, um, where
we help leaders to lead better,live better, and love what they
do.
Tim Newman (10:21):
Yeah, it that it's such a powerful story to to go
from you know doing what wethink everybody wants us to do,
and like you said, trying to getto the next weekend or trying
to just get through thisproject.
And you know what, if I justget through it, every it's gonna
be so much better.
I'll be able to relax, I'll beable to relax.
But no, because you startworking on the next project
before you even that project isfinished, and then well, okay,
(10:43):
I'll just you know what, I justhave to get to July.
And and then it's just I justhave to get to the end of the
year, and then it it it neverends.
And it's that it's that innertalk that we give that we have
ourselves.
If we don't do it, then we'regonna let we're letting somebody
down, we're letting our ballsdown, we're letting our team
down, letting my family down.
Um, and you know, I I I've kindof been there, you know.
What you know, if I was atwork, I was my mind was at home.
(11:08):
If I was at home, my mind wasat work, and I wasn't helping
anybody either, right?
You know, so you're you'reyou're you're you're stuck, and
it's that constant, I'm like yousay, the guilt of I'm not I'm
not helping anybody, I'm lettingeverybody down.
Nothing's getting done at thelevel that we want it to get
done at.
And it's the pressure thatwe're putting on ourselves to um
(11:29):
to fulfill something that wethink somebody else wants.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (11:33):
Yeah, absolutely.
And when when we're regulatingourselves, because that's
essentially what we're doing.
We're regulating how we'refeeling, we're, you know,
suppressing perhaps how we arefeeling.
I think that was one of thebiggest lessons I learned from
that whole time, which was thatmindset isn't everything.
(11:54):
I had been a I'm I'm gonna sayhealthily obsessed with
practical psychology and whatmakes us successful, happy, and
fulfilled, and how we can uhmanage and direct our moods and
emotions.
(12:15):
And I had been obsessed withthat for you know 10 years, kind
of running up to this time whenI collapsed, and I had
forgotten my biology, like thepsychology is great, but
actually you also need thebiology, and yeah, uh and and it
(12:36):
it sounds so simple when I sayit now.
We know that our minds and ourbodies they're not separate
things, right?
Um, but I I was so convincedthat well, I you know, I've just
got to get better at managingthis, or I can reframe this, or
I can uh uh up until the pointthat my body eventually went
(12:57):
back.
Tim Newman (12:58):
It shuts down.
It it it shuts down.
And and that's that's the thethe the biggest problem that
that I think we we we don't everconnect the two, right?
You know, because again, beingI started having health issues.
You know, I mean and j you knowuh you know physical internal
(13:19):
uh health issues and uh and andit it it changed that because of
those health issues it it hadwe had to change lifestyle
because I couldn't do Iphysically couldn't do the
things that I wanted to do or orused to be able to do.
And that made things even worsebecause I would I would I would
get frustrated and mad aboutwell why I should still be able
(13:40):
to do these things and notknowing what was truly
happening, you know,biologically and and psych
psychologically, tying it allback to, you know, again, who I
was trying to be, right?
For for other people.
Rachael Edmondson-Cl (13:55):
Absolutely is crazy.
Absolutely.
You know, it's it and and it'ssometimes it's it's even in the
little things, you know.
I could be the first I'd be thefirst to switch the lights on
in the office in the morning,I'd be the last to switch the
lights off at night.
I would walk around and and ifI was gonna get lunch, I can
remember walking around likeshoveling food in my mouth.
I was walking to differentpeople's desks to go and to go
(14:17):
and catch up with them.
Meeting cultures can be umincredibly difficult because we
get into cultures inorganizations where it's
back-to-back meetings, andactually the etiquette behind
those meetings is notnecessarily great practice.
Tim Newman (14:34):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (14:34):
And where is then the time for us to
do our work?
And we and and we're notestablishing our boundaries and
saying, you know, do I reallyneed to be in this?
And like does this really needto be half an hour?
All of those good things thatmeans we create time within the
day, not only to be able torestore ourselves, um, but also
(14:54):
to be able to do our work and tobe able to do our best work to,
you know, to to to that.
So um yeah, that was a thatthat was a a a huge a huge
lesson.
And there has been times when,you know, I can I have felt
myself move back towards thateven, you know, just to say that
(15:16):
it's not always it's not alwaysperfect.
It wasn't like a once and thenokay, that's it.
Because I think there is Ithink particularly with people
who are driven to achieve greatthings, when when when we
(15:38):
achieve that project, when weget that thing done, or when we
deliver that speech, or whateverit is, that that comes with it,
some of that high and dopaminekick dopamine, that's right.
Quite addictive to kind of bechasing that next that next
thing.
And that's that then withinthat is where there's been much
(16:02):
more nuance, I think, that I'velearned in the 10 years since
this.
At times when I felt myselfkind of coming towards that
burnout again, is checking in,checking myself, and recognizing
actually that my best workcomes when I'm in flow, when I
am energized, when I haverestored well, and that those
(16:27):
things that restore us goodfood, sleep, nature, daylight,
movement, hydration, you know,those those things that restore
us, they aren't the reward forthe work.
They're a critical input to beable to do our best work and
bring our best selves towhatever it is that we're doing.
Tim Newman (16:45):
Yeah, absolutely.
And and I I kind of think it'sfrom a generational perspective,
you know, how we have viewedwork and the idea of of
work-life balance.
Um, I tell uh tell the story ofyou know, my my youngest
daughter.
She's a lot like me, type Apersonality, very driven, very
(17:09):
smart, very I just call myselfsmart.
Um very very I didn't mean it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (17:13):
I'm quite quite right too, quite
right.
This is your daughter that cameback from kindergarten day one
and was like upset that theyhadn't taught her to read
already.
Tim Newman (17:21):
No, this is this is the other one.
This is the younger one.
Yeah, the the yeah, so it wantsin the family too.
But I I trust me, my my kidsare so and and this is weird for
me.
I I think kids today, and nowmy my youngest is 31, but kids
today are so much smarter thanwe were at that age, or I was at
(17:43):
that age.
Um, like my five-year-old is somuch smarter than my kids when
they were five.
And for what for whateverreason, I I can't figure out why
that is.
Um, but what they what theyknow, you know, their speech
patterns, the words that theyuse, I mean, it's to me it's
it's insane.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (18:00):
Um it's interesting, isn't it?
Because I think in in someways, um the world is
exponentially better um at themoment, you know, think about
life expectancy or thetechnology and the connectivity
that we have.
I mean, I was reminding myselfthe other day that to have even
just a two or three minute callwith someone across the pond
(18:24):
like you are, Tim, like 20 yearsago would have cost us an arm
and a leg for me to make thiscall.
And here we are, we're doing itwith beautiful clarity and
video, and it's uh all good.
Um, anyway, um, things aregetting exponentially better,
but at the same time, I think,perhaps paradoxically, things
are getting exponentially worseas well, you know, and we look
(18:46):
at some of the issues facing theworld, you know, and climate,
climate change.
Um the even coming back to thatconnectivity point, yes, we are
more connected to one anotherin many senses.
Tim Newman (19:01):
But less connected.
Rachael Edmondson-Clark (19:02):
Perhaps we lost connection with
ourselves, because I think thisis what we're talking about
here, with perhaps our families,because you were also talking
about that, and and and perhapswith nature, maybe as as well.
I think it's easy in the whatis a very fast-paced world today
to lose connection with thosethings that are really important
(19:23):
for grounding us.
Tim Newman (19:25):
Yeah, and such good points.
And I and I think, you know,just take climate change as as a
for example, how how thingsaren't necessarily necessarily
better.
You know, I I think what we'vedone is we've taken these
issues.
Do you know anybody who wantsdirty water?
Have you ever heard somebodysay, you know what, let me go
(19:46):
get a glass a glass of nicedirty water.
Let me breathe some somehorrible polluted air, right?
Uh I think everybody I've nevermet anybody who said that.
Uh and we've we demonize peopleor the media has allowed us to
demonize people who um may maybeagree, maybe disagree, but say,
(20:08):
well, if you don't agree withthis piece of it, you're the
worst person in the world.
What instead of saying, youknow what, we all want this.
Yeah.
How we get to that maybe alittle bit nuanced.
Let's let's instead ofdemonizing those other people,
why don't we try and worktogether and find a a better
solution than calling thisperson over here horrible or
this person over here a liar,but whatever it is.
(20:29):
Okay, do you want clean airyet?
Do you want clean water?
Yeah, do you do you want youwant to clean up the oceans?
Absolutely.
Do you I mean all those nobodysays that they don't want those
things.
Let's let's let's start fromwhere we agree and work forward
as opposed to, well, you youdisagree and you're the worst
person in the world, so we can'teven talk about it.
You know, and I think I thinkthat's a big, big problem.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (20:52):
And and and this is a big part of
the work that I do and theleaders that I work with, is we
have we are facing a time ofunprecedented um change,
uncertainty, and overlapping andinterconnected challenges.
(21:13):
And that can feel overwhelming.
And so I feel part of my roleis how do I make sure that and
how do I work with leaders sothat they can show up with the
clarity, with the calm, with thecompassion that enables those
(21:34):
around them to bring their bestwork as well.
Because as a as a human race, Ithink when we come together and
we work as you've beendescribing, we we have
tremendous ability to adapt anddo wonderful things.
(21:55):
Yes, but it does take us comingtogether together with that,
yeah.
Tim Newman (22:00):
And and and treating people with love, respect, and
kindness, you know.
Rachael Edmondson-C (22:05):
Absolutely, and it starts with ourselves,
that's not that's not separate,and that can be really hard for
leaders to get because they arevery often putting other people
before themselves, and you youknow, it or maybe it almost
feels selfish orcounterintuitive that I put
(22:27):
myself, I you know, I I putmyself or my the the you know
age old one with chlorine oxygenmask on first, you know?
Tim Newman (22:35):
Yeah, so I I I give blood every time that I I'm able
to, I go I go and I give blood,right?
And so it that time for me waslike maybe a week ago.
And it was 11 30 in themorning, I was supposed to go,
and up to that point, I I'd beenaggravated.
One thing happened, it wouldaggravate me.
The next thing would happen, itwould aggravate, aggravate,
(22:56):
aggravate.
So I go in and they take myblood pressure and my blood
pressure is high.
And she said, Is it normallyhigh?
I said, No, I'm just I've beenaggravated all day.
And I'm just I'm me when I goin, I'm I'm nice to people, you
know, make them laugh.
And I saw when I said that, Isaw her, I saw the nurse step
back, I said, I'm not aggravatedwith you.
I, you know, you know, and andand I had to to to bring her
(23:17):
back and say, you know, unlunless you were, you know, part
of the conspiracy to toaggravate me all day, it's it
has nothing to do with you.
And it kind of made her laugh,but that reminded me that we
can't bring our baggage into anyother situation.
Because number one, we don'tknow what that other person is
dealing with at all.
And a smile could help.
And it's it's not fair to thoseother people for us to bring
(23:40):
our our baggage, ouraggravation, our upsetness,
whatever it is, and and place iton them.
That's for us to deal with withthe people that have were the
situations that have that havecaused those things.
Yes.
And that's so I think that's soimportant for other for leaders
to to understand as well,because if let's just say, you
know, mid-level manager goes into senior level manager, and uh
(24:06):
senior level manager is saying,Look, you you you're not getting
it done, you've got to cutbudgets, you've got to cut
positions, this, that, and theother thing, and they then they
go and they talk to their teamand they start berating their
team, it's not the team's fault.
I mean, he's got to deal withthose types of things and figure
out ways to inspire andmotivate that team to to get
back to wherever it is that theyneed to be.
And and coming in aggravate isnot going to get it done.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (24:29):
No, and incredibly difficult in
those kind of situations andcircumstances.
And um, I mean, just you know,coming back to how um things can
emotionally impact us andimpact our biology and our
ability to be able to performwell.
Um, I do a lot of work with uma company called CHX
(24:52):
Performance.
Their co-founder is ProfessorChris Beattie, and he is a
professor of evolutionaryanthropology and cognition and
neuroscience at both Oxford andKent University.
And he will often talk about ashuman beings, we're very social
creatures.
Tim Newman (25:08):
Yes.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (25:09):
Um, and essentially we have five
social or mammal needs that youknow they will have, they will
vary in their degree ofimportance to us in any given
time of our lives, but these arereally important, and when they
are triggered, that if thoseneeds are not being met, that's
(25:30):
going to cause significantemotional dysregulation.
And if that's not being dealtwith or you know, being
resolved, as you said, witheither the something or someone
that's caused that, then ifwe're not very careful, that's
clinically predictive of certainoutcomes and risks, like
(25:52):
disengagement from work, like umincrease in negative bias, uh,
mental and physical healthproblems, which we've both
talked about, um, departure andburnout, which we've obviously
been talking about.
And I I, you know, you you'vegot a story to share perhaps
about your daughter here aswell.
(26:12):
And it's kind of actually ifwe're not resolving those uh
those emotions and seeing thoseemotional uh those emotions as
useful signals, I thinksometimes it's very easy for us
to think these emotions aregetting in the way.
Just like push them to the backor to the side or wherever.
They are actually incrediblyuseful signals.
(26:32):
And when we can see them asthat and understand what they
are what they are telling us,and we can have open, honest,
and constructive conversationsif it is somebody that is that
is is is causing that, um that'swhat leads to teams that can be
(26:53):
more trusting of one another,can be more inclusive of one
another, uh, will be moreengaged.
And um so far from beingannoying things, these feelings
are absolutely critical toindividual performance and
cultures within our days.
Tim Newman (27:13):
Yeah, I in in in culture culture is so important,
and I and I think it's uh Ithink it's uh often too uh uh o
overlooked to its to itsdetriment.
Um you know, when when you ifyou've just say, for example,
you have somebody who is um anaysayer not not uh not buying
in not buying into uh the theculture of of the organization,
(27:37):
that can that can have uh ddelirious effects on on
productivity and and the team,because uh you know person B
over here is gonna say, well,this person over here is isn't
buying in, so why should I doit?
And then and then it justbecomes a cancer.
And uh it you know, we've gotto find ways to either you know
get that person on board or havethem understand that maybe it's
(28:01):
time for them to move on.
And again, that's okay, right?
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (28:04):
Yeah, it's it it it is, it is okay.
And I I I I know because I'vehad this very that uh very real
example with a very seniorindividual and a senior
leadership team in anorganization, and you you have
to ask the question, how longare you gonna let that rotten
(28:25):
apple stay in the barrel and beaffecting all of those other
apples?
Tim Newman (28:30):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (28:31):
Um yeah, and and uh some of these
conversations to resolve theemotional dysregulation are not
comfortable or easyconversations to necessarily
have, but so criticallyimportant.
Tim Newman (28:46):
And and you know you you you got to see some of
these types of conversationswhen you were really young.
Um your mom owned a large uhhair salon and and you you
worked in there and you youworked the front desk.
So you were the first personthat that the clients came in to
see.
How did how did that reallykind of shape your um
(29:08):
communication strategy, youryour mindset, your business
strategy, and and and how didthat kind of evolve?
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (29:16):
I wouldn't have said this at the
time, but looking back, the factthat we had 300 clients a week
coming in through those doors,and I was very often the first
person that they would see.
I had two telephone linescoming in, and I would need to
assess very, very quickly fromtheir body language how they
(29:38):
were looking, moving, breathing,what they were saying, exactly
where they were at, so that Icould meet them with where they
were at and have the mostinfluential and positive impact
on that communication that I hadwith them.
And so I so I I one of thethings that I take away master.
(30:01):
And I've worked there from theage of 12 to 21.
So one of the things that Ithink I really took away from
that was this how do wecommunicate, how do we read
people?
And um and therefore how do weadapt our communication styles
so that we can have positiveoutcomes and be implementing
(30:24):
positively with them.
Yeah.
Tim Newman (30:27):
Yeah, and and and it's I I think it's so important
to learn that at a young age.
And obviously you had a goodrole model with your mom and be
and being a business owner andunderstanding that you know you
you can't just blow it off.
And it's important and it'sit's it's important for any
number of reasons, but you know,in in in that case, it's
important to um you know, forfor the bottom line for the
(30:49):
business, it's also importantfor for the the customer to be
able to um or the stylist to beable to communicate and w with
the with the customer to givethem what they wanted to get
them to to relax so that theycould actually give give them
the the services that that theyneeded.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (31:06):
Ah, absolutely.
And you know, we'd have a we'dhave such a variety of different
customers coming in, we'd havea solicitor that would come in
and make sure that her hair wasdone before she was in court any
time that she was going intocourt.
She was very needed to be youknow dealt with very
proficiently, very veryeffectively, didn't want to mess
around, everything you knowneeded to be just right, and she
(31:29):
wanted to be in and out.
And then you had people who didcome in and they might be
really, really nervous, peoplewho've not had their hair cut in
in years and are coming in fora restyle, and they're you know,
they're they're feeling quitenervous about what that might
be, and and everything inbetween.
I I think another thing for meabout working in the salon,
(31:50):
which carries on in the workthat I do today, is the way that
you can really help to have apositive impact on others.
I'll never forget answering thephone one day, and it was a
woman who had cancer.
(32:11):
She was having chemotherapy andshe'd lost the hair.
And her family had clubbedtogether to buy her a real hair
wig to give her the confidenceto be able to go out.
Um, but this real hair wig wasvery tatty, it wasn't in any
shape or style that particularlysuited her, and she knew it
(32:33):
needed to be cut.
Well, unlike real hair, you cuta wig once, it's not burnt
black.
Right.
She was saying to me, you know,I'm just very nervous about
this.
Like, what can I do?
Or I've never been to see youbefore.
And I said, you know, thatthere's one person I want to
book you in to look at.
And she was also very um, sheshe she also wanted it to be
(32:54):
kept private as well.
So she didn't be sitting, youknow, in a salon with people
seeing through the windows ofwhat was being done.
So we kept the salon open laterthat night, and she came right
at the end of the day, and andmy mum, of course, looked after
her.
Um, and the transformation inthat woman and her energy and
(33:17):
going out with her new real hairwig in a cut and a shape that
just made her feel a milliondollars was just incredible.
And and that happened all thetime, right?
It wasn't that's that storystands out for me be because of
it, but it that happened all thetime, you know.
You'd see people coming in alittle bit stressed or a bit
(33:40):
frazzled or and them going out,you know, feeling calm and
refreshed and just like, oh, Ifeel so much better.
Tim Newman (33:46):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (33:47):
And um, and and I and I and I love
that that as human beings we getto be able to support one
another in those kind of ways.
Tim Newman (33:55):
Yeah, and it especially in that situation,
and and it and I say that, butyou know, it goes for any number
of just different situationswhere where somebody just wants
to be heard, they they want theywant people to to to just hear
them.
And it that just by by justfeeling heard, you know, feeling
listened to, that changes theirmindset altogether.
(34:18):
Um even if you couldn't havehelped her, if you had tried and
d and done those things, shewould have felt so much better.
But in in that situation, uh,you know, going through what
she's going through, thatprobably, you know, that
probably changed her life,honestly.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (34:36):
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I and I'm in the fortunateposition that there has been
many people that have changedthe trajectory of my life in
very positive ways.
Um and I I I I know you've gotsome exciting news coming up in
terms of the coaching and thespeaking and the training that
(34:57):
you're qualified in now as well,Tim.
You perhaps tell us a bit aboutthat in just a second.
Um and uh because I really dobelieve in that personal
development journey.
And uh and let me add this thatpersonal development journey,
(35:19):
not just so not just so it's notabout necessarily what we get
or we achieve, but it's aboutwho we become in the process and
what we do with that.
I think that's the thing, it'snot just about the
self-actualization and this, youknow, that fulfillment.
That's a really important partof what we're doing, but it's
then how do we then show up asthe leaders our world needs
(35:42):
right now?
Tim Newman (35:43):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (35:44):
And so it's it it's it's bringing that
back to you know, reporting forduty with our families, with
our communities, in ourorganizations, and being able to
show up as as the best that wecan.
And what I was gonna say wasthose people that have touched
my I've I've been fortunate towork with some of the best
coaches in the world, and um,and I have I have three mentors
(36:07):
that I see and speak toregularly, and that there is the
the the podcasts and things,you know, this type of thing are
so wonderful.
And I would encourage people tobe fertilizing their minds with
you know, kind of good sourcesof information and um continuing
(36:33):
to find courage and be braveand to operate in that amber
zone, you know, so we know thegreen zone is that comfort zone.
It's not about being in the redzone and being completely
stressed and you know, but howdo we spend more of our time in
that amber zone where we are,you know, we are stretching, we
are becoming, we are evolvingwho we are.
(36:53):
And um with that view of how dowe how do we better serve?
Tim Newman (37:00):
Yeah, and that and again, that that's the key.
I mean you can you can havementors, you can take classes,
you can listen to podcasts, youcan do all those things, but if
you don't actually put it intoaction, if you don't actually
step outside your house andactually use that and and again
connect with people and treatthem with love, kindness, and
(37:21):
respect, then what it's you youhaven't done anything.
You you it it's just become anabstract idea.
It's it's actually doing thatand touching people and and
becoming who you say you want towant to actually be.
It's so it's so important toactually do it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (37:38):
And coming back to what you were
asking me about right at thebeginning and my story, I didn't
always feel like it waspossible for me to become the
person that I am now.
If you can imagine, you know,going back to that point where I
was in that corporate role.
And even when I decided that Iwanted to leave the corporate
world and start my own business,it was shrouded in in doubt and
(38:02):
um fear and questioning aboutwhether I could or uh I would be
capable of doing that.
And and it's not even been astraight line since then.
Tim Newman (38:15):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (38:16):
You know, and uh a couple of very
quick stories, but I think thatlife does test us.
Um I had decided to leave thecorporate world and very
fortunately had an offer of umof a redundancy situation, a
settlement agreement through thethrough the company.
They were restructuring theteams again, and my role wasn't
(38:37):
going to exist the way that ithad been existing.
And um, so that was an optionfor me to take.
And the day before I signedthat paperwork, my husband and I
found out that we were pregnantwith our first child.
Tim Newman (38:50):
That's awesome.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (38:52):
It's awesome.
It's also incredibly fun, youknow, kind of start a business
with a baby in my arms.
I'm already gonna do this.
Um, and um, you know, so thatwas that was one challenge
initially.
And I think sometimes we can'talways see the road ahead
clearly, but to trust and takethose first steps, always I
(39:13):
always remember it feeling likeI was at this edge of a misty
lake.
And I there were steppingstones across the lake, but all
I could see was the firststepping stone, and it's I can't
see where I'm going.
Like, I don't know how this isgonna work, how I'm gonna have a
baby and build this businessand and and and somehow when you
commit to that first step, moreof the mist lifts, and you see
(39:36):
with greater clarity the nextstep, and then the next step,
and then you know, eventually itbecomes clearer and clearer
where you're headed and whatyou're doing.
But sometimes you have to takethat leap and that that that
step forwards and trust thatyou're following your heart and
doing the right thing.
And um COVID was another timewhere I lost 95% of my business
(40:00):
overnight during COVID andeffectively had to rebuild
again.
And I've rebuilt better andstronger, and the business is
doing better now than it hadever done pre-COVID.
Uh, but you know, it that was areal tough 12 months, 12, 18
months, really, really tough.
And you start to question, canI do this?
(40:22):
That's where the coaches andthe mentors are really important
to keep it.
Tim Newman (40:27):
Really important.
Because, you know, the thatinner voice is you telling
yourself that you can't do it orthat you know you shouldn't do
it because of this, that, or theother thing.
And and having people withinyour inner circle that are in
and I'm not saying that you needor should have people in your
inner circle that are yespeople, oh yeah, you're the
greatest thing ever.
(40:47):
Yes, you can do it, yes, youcan do it.
Don't worry about it, you'vegot this.
But having people in your innercircle that you can actually
trust that are going to hit youstraight with whatever it is,
yes, you yes, you can do it.
These are the things that youneed to look at, these are the
things that you need to planforward, need to approach and
and and address.
If you do those things, yes,you can do this.
Um, it's not all gonna be, youknow, red roses, right?
(41:11):
It's it there's going to bebumps in the road.
But having people in your innercircle who are gonna shoot you
straight and help you get overthat inner dialogue that is the
one that's really keeping usdown, is it's critical.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (41:24):
My coach calls it fierce empathy,
which I like.
It's like it's it's likesimultaneously I have the
ability to kick you up the arsewhile giving you a massive hug.
I'm like, yeah, you do, you do.
And and I message I messagedone of my mentors earlier this
week, and I was like, can youtake a look at this?
So it's something that I'dproduced, and I was like, I want
(41:44):
you to, I want you to tell melike where's the BS in this,
right?
And how can I make it even moretrue?
And you know, uh that they areyou you need you absolutely do
you need that.
Tim Newman (41:59):
Yeah.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (42:00):
Always within my within my coaching, I
will whatever I do is from aplace of compassion and love.
But sometimes we all needcalling out.
Tim Newman (42:09):
Exactly.
Oh no, absolutely.
And and it's it's I I I I thinkyou know, people get they they
confuse things.
They they confuse the the ideaof support with telling you
everything's gonna be okay whenguess what?
Sometimes it it may not beokay, right?
But but I'm going to be therewith you to help you get through
(42:32):
it, right?
There that's that extra extrastep.
And you know, my wife and I arevery, very different people.
Um she's a nurturer.
I mean, she'll come and she'llrub your back and you know, tell
you it's gonna be okay andwe'll get you through it.
And I'm just I I'm the directperson.
Okay.
We these are things that theseare the steps that have to be
(42:52):
taken.
Let's just put your boots on,let's let's let's trudge on
through trudge on through it.
I'm with you, but I'm not I'mnot gonna be the guy that that
that's you know, ru rubbing yourback.
So, you know, there's there'sdifferent ways of of being that
support system and and and youknow helping people through it,
(43:12):
but don't confuse the idea of umsupport with just telling you
everything's gonna be okay,because that's not it's not
being honest.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (43:22):
No, no, absolutely.
And this will tie into uh, youknow, I know you've done a huge
amount of work um with uh withJohn Maxwell and um and
congratulations because Ibelieve you've got a very
important date coming up soon.
Tim Newman (43:38):
Yeah, we've we've I've got some some really good
things coming up this thisweekend, and um it it to me it's
it it goes back to tomentorship and and proximity, be
you know, be in having peoplein your inner circle that uh are
of like mind, that um are doingthe things that you want to do,
that you can um uh go feed offof them.
(44:01):
But again, it's it's not thatI'm just sucking everything out.
I also have to provide valueback to them as well, right?
That that's that's that's alsosomething that I think is
forgotten in terms of umcoaching, networking, and
mentoring.
Um you still have to providevalue back to those people that
are providing you value.
And um th this weekend for meis it's I I've been looking
(44:21):
forward to it for about sixmonths.
Um and uh I I don't want togive too much away, but uh when
so I I just put out a uh uh theepisode that came out this
morning, actually.
So so this episode is gonnacome out in in a few weeks.
The episode I put out thismorning, I told people in that
episode that, you know, I'mgonna have a big announcement
(44:44):
here in two weeks.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (44:44):
And we're going to MyState.
Tim Newman (44:49):
That's okay.
That's okay.
So I'm excited about it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (44:52):
And now you'll know by the time this
comes out, people will it'svery exciting.
Tim Newman (44:58):
It is.
And you know, it's um again, soit's things don't just happen
either, right?
You have to actually put in thework, and that's that's an
another key distinction um thatthat I think some of the younger
generations miss.
And I'm not I'm not bashing yosome of the younger generations,
but it's the the idea thatthere's expectations or there's
(45:20):
um entitlement.
You you have to actually do thework.
You have to actually putyourself out there, do the hard
things, do the things thatyou're uncomfortable doing, and
get through it and get to theother side, and then you can
look back and say, wow, numberone, it wasn't that hard.
Number two, I've grown so muchfrom it.
Number number three, I'velearned so much from it.
(45:41):
Number four, I can startproviding people with so much
more value and helping peoplethat you know I may not have
been able to help before on andon and on.
Rachael Edmondson-C (45:50):
Absolutely.
Are you talking about um thatmentality, that go-giver
mentality that you weredescribing there, and how
important it is not just to goto networks and um people to
get, but also to give.
I don't know if you read thisbook, but um it's one that I
love that's by um Bud Berg andJohn David Mann.
(46:14):
It's called The Go-Giver.
Great, great, not a big book.
It's um it's it's a it's alittle story, um, but it's all
about that go-giver, I thatgo-giver mentality and idea.
And I just I I love it.
And and this is what I this iswhat I have applied in my 10
years of business, and it servedme really, really well.
Tim Newman (46:39):
That's I just wrote that down, it's gonna be the
next the the next book.
That's it.
Thank you so much.
Rachel, we we didn't even getto half the things that we want
to talk to, so um, we're gonnahave to schedule more time.
If if if if you have more time,um, I'd I'd love to to get you
scheduled back on and and um youknow finish this discussion.
I I I think you and I couldtalk for for for days and days.
(47:02):
Um I you know it's there's somuch synergy there.
And and I you again, you youbring so so much good
information and value.
Uh I'd again I'd love to getyou back on.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (47:14):
Oh gosh, Tim, I would love to join
you.
And if anything that we've beentalking about today has
resonated with any of yourlisteners, I have got something
practical that they would beable to take away.
Have you got just a couple ofquestions?
Tim Newman (47:27):
Oh yes, ma'am, please, please share.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (47:29):
Yes, okay.
So I have created a very simpletool called the pause.
It's just five questions, butthey're the kind that can cut
through the noise that I wasdescribing that can really leave
you feeling overwhelmed and umand stressed out and anxious,
and they can help you lead fromthat place of truth, not fear.
(47:50):
So if anybody would like that,they can download it for free at
l of r.co.uk.
That's e-l-l-e-v-ar-r.
Um, or connect with me onLinkedIn, and I'd be very happy
to send that with um with anyonewho wants a little more clarity
and calm in the middle of whatis often very chaotic.
(48:12):
And Tim, perhaps we can alsomake sure that those links are
with the show notes as well forpeople to easily find.
Tim Newman (48:17):
Yes, I'll I will make sure that those are in the
show notes.
Um thank you so much for forthat resource.
I again it's it's somethingthat I I I know is gonna help
help our listeners.
And that's one of the thingsthat that I love about our
guests.
You know, they they they giveour listeners something that as
soon as they listen to theepisode, they can go and start
(48:38):
putting into practice today.
Don't wait.
Put it into practice today andwatch, watch how your how your
life changes.
What you know, what watch howyour communication changes,
watch how your leadershipchanges, watch, watch how it how
it affects the people that arearound you.
It's it's very impactful.
Thank you so much.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (48:58):
Tim, thank you for all you bring and
all you do, and I will bedelighted to come and join you
again.
Thank you.
Tim Newman (49:04):
Awesome.
Thank you so much, and and uhwe'll we'll talk soon.
Be sure to visitspeakingwithconfidence
podcast.com to get your freeebook, Top 21 Challenges for
Public Speakers and How toOvercome.
You can also register for theForum for Public Speaking Forum.
Always remember your voice is apower changer.
We'll talk to you next time.
Welcome back to Speaking with Confidence.
Podcast that helps you buildthe soft skills that lead to
real results.
Communication, storytelling,public speaking, and showing up
with confidence in everyconversation that counts.
I'm Tim Newman, a recoveringcollege professor turned
communication coach, and I'mthrilled to guide you on your
journey to becoming a powerfulcommunicator.
Today's guest is RachelEdmondson Clark.
(00:32):
Rachel brings a powerful blendof boardroom experience and
entrepreneurial insight.
She is a former senior leaderin the corporate world who spent
the last 10 years running herown leadership consultancy,
Elivar.
She works with high-performingleaders and teams who want to
lead with clarity, courage, andimpact without burning out or
losing who they are in theprocess.
(00:52):
Mrs.
Clark is also the formerregional vice president and
president of the ProfessionalSpeaking Association in the UK
and Ireland and a sought-afterspeaker, coach, and consultant.
Welcome, Rachel.
Rachel, welcome to the show.
I'm really excited to have youand have this conversation.
I've been looking forward to itfor a while.
Rachael Edmondson-Clar (01:11):
Awesome.
I am delighted to be here.
I'm well done with all of mynames.
If we'd actually add it in theDeVinia and Tamara, which are my
middle names, it gets to bequite a mouthful.
Honestly, despite despiteappearances and the double
barreled name, I am not thatpartial.
And I'm definitely, as youprobably hear from the accent,
I'm from a place in uh inEngland called Nottingham or
(01:33):
Nottingham, as we might say.
So yeah, no, very down toearth, Bath and not it's Bath,
not Bath in my house, um,despite all of those names.
Anyway, I'm delighted to behere.
I've been super excited too.
I have um been looking forwardto this since we had our
original planning session forthe show.
Tim Newman (01:53):
And someone I don't know if I told you this, but um
I spent some time in Manchesterand Stockport when I was a kid.
Um when uh when Charles andDiana got married, I was
actually over there.
We uh uh uh we were on alacrosse tour.
So I was I was 13 years old andwe spent probably we probably
(02:14):
spent a month in, you know, myhost family was in Manchester,
and we probably spent a monthtraveling around uh the United
Kingdom playing lacrosse againstdifferent different lacrosse
clubs.
And um I I I vividly rememberthe party that we had at my host
family's house when PrinceCharles and Prince Diana got
married.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (02:33):
Oh my goodness.
1981, I think.
Tim Newman (02:36):
I'm old, Rachel.
I'm old.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (02:39):
1981 they got married.
What?
Oh my goodness.
And Manchester is a wonderful,wonderful city.
I was I was there only a coupleof weeks ago working with one
of my clients, and um, yeah,it's a great city to be in.
I love staying up there whenI'm there.
Um it's really vibrant, lots oflots of good, lots of good
(03:00):
stuff to be said.
And um, and Tim, what I wasalso just saying around just um
it is such a pleasure and such adelight to be here.
You are one of um you are sucha warm-hearted, genuine um host,
and I'm just delighted to havethis conversation with you.
So thank you for having one.
Tim Newman (03:21):
Thank you.
You're making me blush.
I you know, I I'm an introvert,I'm a screaming introvert, and
you know, I you know, I I alwaystry and direct the the the
attention away from me and on tothe guests.
Um I I actually had aconversation yesterday with
somebody, and um he he asked,you know, you know, awards,
(03:42):
this, that, and the other thing,and and I said, look, man, it's
that's not me.
It's not it's not who I am.
I I'm I consider myself aconnector, not a climber, right?
My what I do is I connectpeople to and and help put them
in places for them to besuccessful.
And that I'm very happy doingthat.
I I like doing that.
And and to me, it's it's moreservice and value is what drives
(04:02):
me than any awards or oraccolades or things of that
nature.
So thank you.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (04:08):
No, and it's really clear.
It's really clear from meetingyou and the way that you prepare
and plan and um welcome yourhosts to the show.
So thank you.
Tim Newman (04:19):
Well well, let's talk about you.
Um let's talk about yourjourney.
You know, you and and I thinkthat you know your your journey
really is isn't too uncommon.
You you went you went touniversity, you graduated, and
you started climbing thatcorporate ladder.
And you know, take it fromthere and and walk us through
how you got to where you arenow.
Because I I think is I thinkyour story is really important
(04:42):
for people to understand um somemindset shifts that we we as a
society need to start making.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (04:49):
Of course.
So you're absolutely right.
I thought I was very clear onwhat I wanted.
I went to college, university,I started off in the corporate
world and climbed that ladder tosome senior roles in both sales
and marketing.
And I can still vividlyremember the afternoon that all
(05:13):
of that came crumbling down.
I was in my glass-frontedoffice and I was preparing to go
into the boardroom, and insteadof walking out that door, I
found myself lying on the floor,staring up at the ceiling
tiles.
I had collapsed.
(05:34):
I couldn't think, I couldn'tbreathe in that moment, and it
was a really low and scary,scary moment for me.
Um, and what had led me to thatpoint had been months and if
not even years, of disrespectingmy body, of ignoring the most
(05:59):
important relationships in mylife, and of pushing through
thinking that I knew all themindset stuff.
I knew how to regulate how Iwas feeling, and if I just kept
working harder and harder, or ifI could just get to the next
(06:20):
weekend or through this nextproject, that things would get
better.
And in the end, my body wenttime out.
And I was able to get myself upoff the floor.
I needed to because nobodycould quickly see what had
happened to me.
Um so I I did manage to getenough breath to get me back on,
(06:44):
you know, kind of at least justsat in my in my office.
And I often describe thatmoment a bit like being slapped
around the face with a wetch,you know, kind of like I
remember I remember that it waslike this real realization with
myself, you can't do thisanymore.
Like this is a stop, like thisis an something must change.
(07:09):
And um a day or two after that,I had arranged to speak with my
my director.
Uh, we had a very honestconversation, and uh eventually
we restructured the team, and Iwent instead of heading up the
(07:30):
team, I moved into the team aspart of the team, and I helped
to recruit somebody of with withgreater experience that could
do that role that I had beendoing for the last of 18 months,
two years.
Um and it was that was tough.
That was really tough.
I went from having thatglass-fronted office to moving
(07:52):
out of that glass-fronted.
So all the senior leaders hadthose these glass-fronted off
around a big open plan officefor you know everyone else.
Um, it was just the way thebuilding had been designed.
And I had to, I came out ofthat office and sat back in the
open plan area outside of whathad been my office to watch
someone else walk in, as you canimagine.
(08:14):
That was um that that wastough.
I felt guilt, I felt shame, Ifelt a lot of things.
And over the course of what wasreally about a three-year
period um following that moment,um I really reassessed and
(08:36):
revalued what was most importantto me.
There was another there wasanother moment that I remember
specifically.
I was um getting ready for workone morning and I was stood in
the shower, and it was likethere was a it was like there
was a whisper on my heart that Icouldn't hear or make out what
(08:57):
the whisper was saying.
And I that morning I decided toturn to that whisper inside of
me and go, what what are yousaying?
What are you saying to me?
Let me try and listen, let metry and hear.
And essentially it was saying,You're made for more than this.
(09:18):
And I was like, but what?
But like, but what?
I I don't know what that is.
And although the answer didn'tcome there and then, I remember
stepping out of the shower andmy feet touching the bath mat.
And at that point, I'd made adecision that I no longer wanted
a job or a career, but I wanteda life's mission, a work that I
(09:44):
could feel like I could jumpout of bed for every day.
And that's what I then spentthe next three years kind of
exploring with excitement andpossibility what that could be
and what that could look like,and following my heart and what
was lighting what was lightingme up.
Tim Newman (10:03):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (10:04):
And ultimately that led me to oh
over 10 years ago now, launchingmy business, Elevar, um, where
we help leaders to lead better,live better, and love what they
do.
Tim Newman (10:21):
Yeah, it that it's such a powerful story to to go
from you know doing what wethink everybody wants us to do,
and like you said, trying to getto the next weekend or trying
to just get through thisproject.
And you know what, if I justget through it, every it's gonna
be so much better.
I'll be able to relax, I'll beable to relax.
But no, because you startworking on the next project
before you even that project isfinished, and then well, okay,
(10:43):
I'll just you know what, I justhave to get to July.
And and then it's just I justhave to get to the end of the
year, and then it it it neverends.
And it's that it's that innertalk that we give that we have
ourselves.
If we don't do it, then we'regonna let we're letting somebody
down, we're letting our ballsdown, we're letting our team
down, letting my family down.
Um, and you know, I I I've kindof been there, you know.
What you know, if I was atwork, I was my mind was at home.
(11:08):
If I was at home, my mind wasat work, and I wasn't helping
anybody either, right?
You know, so you're you'reyou're you're you're stuck, and
it's that constant, I'm like yousay, the guilt of I'm not I'm
not helping anybody, I'm lettingeverybody down.
Nothing's getting done at thelevel that we want it to get
done at.
And it's the pressure thatwe're putting on ourselves to um
(11:29):
to fulfill something that wethink somebody else wants.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (11:33):
Yeah, absolutely.
And when when we're regulatingourselves, because that's
essentially what we're doing.
We're regulating how we'refeeling, we're, you know,
suppressing perhaps how we arefeeling.
I think that was one of thebiggest lessons I learned from
that whole time, which was thatmindset isn't everything.
(11:54):
I had been a I'm I'm gonna sayhealthily obsessed with
practical psychology and whatmakes us successful, happy, and
fulfilled, and how we can uhmanage and direct our moods and
emotions.
(12:15):
And I had been obsessed withthat for you know 10 years, kind
of running up to this time whenI collapsed, and I had
forgotten my biology, like thepsychology is great, but
actually you also need thebiology, and yeah, uh and and it
(12:36):
it sounds so simple when I sayit now.
We know that our minds and ourbodies they're not separate
things, right?
Um, but I I was so convincedthat well, I you know, I've just
got to get better at managingthis, or I can reframe this, or
I can uh uh up until the pointthat my body eventually went
(12:57):
back.
Tim Newman (12:58):
It shuts down.
It it it shuts down.
And and that's that's the thethe the biggest problem that
that I think we we we don't everconnect the two, right?
You know, because again, beingI started having health issues.
You know, I mean and j you knowuh you know physical internal
(13:19):
uh health issues and uh and andit it it changed that because of
those health issues it it hadwe had to change lifestyle
because I couldn't do Iphysically couldn't do the
things that I wanted to do or orused to be able to do.
And that made things even worsebecause I would I would I would
get frustrated and mad aboutwell why I should still be able
(13:40):
to do these things and notknowing what was truly
happening, you know,biologically and and psych
psychologically, tying it allback to, you know, again, who I
was trying to be, right?
For for other people.
Rachael Edmondson-Cl (13:55):
Absolutely is crazy.
Absolutely.
You know, it's it and and it'ssometimes it's it's even in the
little things, you know.
I could be the first I'd be thefirst to switch the lights on
in the office in the morning,I'd be the last to switch the
lights off at night.
I would walk around and and ifI was gonna get lunch, I can
remember walking around likeshoveling food in my mouth.
I was walking to differentpeople's desks to go and to go
(14:17):
and catch up with them.
Meeting cultures can be umincredibly difficult because we
get into cultures inorganizations where it's
back-to-back meetings, andactually the etiquette behind
those meetings is notnecessarily great practice.
Tim Newman (14:34):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (14:34):
And where is then the time for us to
do our work?
And we and and we're notestablishing our boundaries and
saying, you know, do I reallyneed to be in this?
And like does this really needto be half an hour?
All of those good things thatmeans we create time within the
day, not only to be able torestore ourselves, um, but also
(14:54):
to be able to do our work and tobe able to do our best work to,
you know, to to to that.
So um yeah, that was a thatthat was a a a huge a huge
lesson.
And there has been times when,you know, I can I have felt
myself move back towards thateven, you know, just to say that
(15:16):
it's not always it's not alwaysperfect.
It wasn't like a once and thenokay, that's it.
Because I think there is Ithink particularly with people
who are driven to achieve greatthings, when when when we
(15:38):
achieve that project, when weget that thing done, or when we
deliver that speech, or whateverit is, that that comes with it,
some of that high and dopaminekick dopamine, that's right.
Quite addictive to kind of bechasing that next that next
thing.
And that's that then withinthat is where there's been much
(16:02):
more nuance, I think, that I'velearned in the 10 years since
this.
At times when I felt myselfkind of coming towards that
burnout again, is checking in,checking myself, and recognizing
actually that my best workcomes when I'm in flow, when I
am energized, when I haverestored well, and that those
(16:27):
things that restore us goodfood, sleep, nature, daylight,
movement, hydration, you know,those those things that restore
us, they aren't the reward forthe work.
They're a critical input to beable to do our best work and
bring our best selves towhatever it is that we're doing.
Tim Newman (16:45):
Yeah, absolutely.
And and I I kind of think it'sfrom a generational perspective,
you know, how we have viewedwork and the idea of of
work-life balance.
Um, I tell uh tell the story ofyou know, my my youngest
daughter.
She's a lot like me, type Apersonality, very driven, very
(17:09):
smart, very I just call myselfsmart.
Um very very I didn't mean it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (17:13):
I'm quite quite right too, quite
right.
This is your daughter that cameback from kindergarten day one
and was like upset that theyhadn't taught her to read
already.
Tim Newman (17:21):
No, this is this is the other one.
This is the younger one.
Yeah, the the yeah, so it wantsin the family too.
But I I trust me, my my kidsare so and and this is weird for
me.
I I think kids today, and nowmy my youngest is 31, but kids
today are so much smarter thanwe were at that age, or I was at
(17:43):
that age.
Um, like my five-year-old is somuch smarter than my kids when
they were five.
And for what for whateverreason, I I can't figure out why
that is.
Um, but what they what theyknow, you know, their speech
patterns, the words that theyuse, I mean, it's to me it's
it's insane.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (18:00):
Um it's interesting, isn't it?
Because I think in in someways, um the world is
exponentially better um at themoment, you know, think about
life expectancy or thetechnology and the connectivity
that we have.
I mean, I was reminding myselfthe other day that to have even
just a two or three minute callwith someone across the pond
(18:24):
like you are, Tim, like 20 yearsago would have cost us an arm
and a leg for me to make thiscall.
And here we are, we're doing itwith beautiful clarity and
video, and it's uh all good.
Um, anyway, um, things aregetting exponentially better,
but at the same time, I think,perhaps paradoxically, things
are getting exponentially worseas well, you know, and we look
(18:46):
at some of the issues facing theworld, you know, and climate,
climate change.
Um the even coming back to thatconnectivity point, yes, we are
more connected to one anotherin many senses.
Tim Newman (19:01):
But less connected.
Rachael Edmondson-Clark (19:02):
Perhaps we lost connection with
ourselves, because I think thisis what we're talking about
here, with perhaps our families,because you were also talking
about that, and and and perhapswith nature, maybe as as well.
I think it's easy in the whatis a very fast-paced world today
to lose connection with thosethings that are really important
(19:23):
for grounding us.
Tim Newman (19:25):
Yeah, and such good points.
And I and I think, you know,just take climate change as as a
for example, how how thingsaren't necessarily necessarily
better.
You know, I I think what we'vedone is we've taken these
issues.
Do you know anybody who wantsdirty water?
Have you ever heard somebodysay, you know what, let me go
(19:46):
get a glass a glass of nicedirty water.
Let me breathe some somehorrible polluted air, right?
Uh I think everybody I've nevermet anybody who said that.
Uh and we've we demonize peopleor the media has allowed us to
demonize people who um may maybeagree, maybe disagree, but say,
(20:08):
well, if you don't agree withthis piece of it, you're the
worst person in the world.
What instead of saying, youknow what, we all want this.
Yeah.
How we get to that maybe alittle bit nuanced.
Let's let's instead ofdemonizing those other people,
why don't we try and worktogether and find a a better
solution than calling thisperson over here horrible or
this person over here a liar,but whatever it is.
(20:29):
Okay, do you want clean airyet?
Do you want clean water?
Yeah, do you do you want youwant to clean up the oceans?
Absolutely.
Do you I mean all those nobodysays that they don't want those
things.
Let's let's let's start fromwhere we agree and work forward
as opposed to, well, you youdisagree and you're the worst
person in the world, so we can'teven talk about it.
You know, and I think I thinkthat's a big, big problem.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (20:52):
And and and this is a big part of
the work that I do and theleaders that I work with, is we
have we are facing a time ofunprecedented um change,
uncertainty, and overlapping andinterconnected challenges.
(21:13):
And that can feel overwhelming.
And so I feel part of my roleis how do I make sure that and
how do I work with leaders sothat they can show up with the
clarity, with the calm, with thecompassion that enables those
(21:34):
around them to bring their bestwork as well.
Because as a as a human race, Ithink when we come together and
we work as you've beendescribing, we we have
tremendous ability to adapt anddo wonderful things.
(21:55):
Yes, but it does take us comingtogether together with that,
yeah.
Tim Newman (22:00):
And and and treating people with love, respect, and
kindness, you know.
Rachael Edmondson-C (22:05):
Absolutely, and it starts with ourselves,
that's not that's not separate,and that can be really hard for
leaders to get because they arevery often putting other people
before themselves, and you youknow, it or maybe it almost
feels selfish orcounterintuitive that I put
(22:27):
myself, I you know, I I putmyself or my the the you know
age old one with chlorine oxygenmask on first, you know?
Tim Newman (22:35):
Yeah, so I I I give blood every time that I I'm able
to, I go I go and I give blood,right?
And so it that time for me waslike maybe a week ago.
And it was 11 30 in themorning, I was supposed to go,
and up to that point, I I'd beenaggravated.
One thing happened, it wouldaggravate me.
The next thing would happen, itwould aggravate, aggravate,
(22:56):
aggravate.
So I go in and they take myblood pressure and my blood
pressure is high.
And she said, Is it normallyhigh?
I said, No, I'm just I've beenaggravated all day.
And I'm just I'm me when I goin, I'm I'm nice to people, you
know, make them laugh.
And I saw when I said that, Isaw her, I saw the nurse step
back, I said, I'm not aggravatedwith you.
I, you know, you know, and andand I had to to to bring her
(23:17):
back and say, you know, unlunless you were, you know, part
of the conspiracy to toaggravate me all day, it's it
has nothing to do with you.
And it kind of made her laugh,but that reminded me that we
can't bring our baggage into anyother situation.
Because number one, we don'tknow what that other person is
dealing with at all.
And a smile could help.
And it's it's not fair to thoseother people for us to bring
(23:40):
our our baggage, ouraggravation, our upsetness,
whatever it is, and and place iton them.
That's for us to deal with withthe people that have were the
situations that have that havecaused those things.
Yes.
And that's so I think that's soimportant for other for leaders
to to understand as well,because if let's just say, you
know, mid-level manager goes into senior level manager, and uh
(24:06):
senior level manager is saying,Look, you you you're not getting
it done, you've got to cutbudgets, you've got to cut
positions, this, that, and theother thing, and they then they
go and they talk to their teamand they start berating their
team, it's not the team's fault.
I mean, he's got to deal withthose types of things and figure
out ways to inspire andmotivate that team to to get
back to wherever it is that theyneed to be.
And and coming in aggravate isnot going to get it done.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (24:29):
No, and incredibly difficult in
those kind of situations andcircumstances.
And um, I mean, just you know,coming back to how um things can
emotionally impact us andimpact our biology and our
ability to be able to performwell.
Um, I do a lot of work with uma company called CHX
(24:52):
Performance.
Their co-founder is ProfessorChris Beattie, and he is a
professor of evolutionaryanthropology and cognition and
neuroscience at both Oxford andKent University.
And he will often talk about ashuman beings, we're very social
creatures.
Tim Newman (25:08):
Yes.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (25:09):
Um, and essentially we have five
social or mammal needs that youknow they will have, they will
vary in their degree ofimportance to us in any given
time of our lives, but these arereally important, and when they
are triggered, that if thoseneeds are not being met, that's
(25:30):
going to cause significantemotional dysregulation.
And if that's not being dealtwith or you know, being
resolved, as you said, witheither the something or someone
that's caused that, then ifwe're not very careful, that's
clinically predictive of certainoutcomes and risks, like
(25:52):
disengagement from work, like umincrease in negative bias, uh,
mental and physical healthproblems, which we've both
talked about, um, departure andburnout, which we've obviously
been talking about.
And I I, you know, you you'vegot a story to share perhaps
about your daughter here aswell.
(26:12):
And it's kind of actually ifwe're not resolving those uh
those emotions and seeing thoseemotional uh those emotions as
useful signals, I thinksometimes it's very easy for us
to think these emotions aregetting in the way.
Just like push them to the backor to the side or wherever.
They are actually incrediblyuseful signals.
(26:32):
And when we can see them asthat and understand what they
are what they are telling us,and we can have open, honest,
and constructive conversationsif it is somebody that is that
is is is causing that, um that'swhat leads to teams that can be
(26:53):
more trusting of one another,can be more inclusive of one
another, uh, will be moreengaged.
And um so far from beingannoying things, these feelings
are absolutely critical toindividual performance and
cultures within our days.
Tim Newman (27:13):
Yeah, I in in in culture culture is so important,
and I and I think it's uh Ithink it's uh often too uh uh o
overlooked to its to itsdetriment.
Um you know, when when you ifyou've just say, for example,
you have somebody who is um anaysayer not not uh not buying
in not buying into uh the theculture of of the organization,
(27:37):
that can that can have uh ddelirious effects on on
productivity and and the team,because uh you know person B
over here is gonna say, well,this person over here is isn't
buying in, so why should I doit?
And then and then it justbecomes a cancer.
And uh it you know, we've gotto find ways to either you know
get that person on board or havethem understand that maybe it's
(28:01):
time for them to move on.
And again, that's okay, right?
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (28:04):
Yeah, it's it it it is, it is okay.
And I I I I know because I'vehad this very that uh very real
example with a very seniorindividual and a senior
leadership team in anorganization, and you you have
to ask the question, how longare you gonna let that rotten
(28:25):
apple stay in the barrel and beaffecting all of those other
apples?
Tim Newman (28:30):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (28:31):
Um yeah, and and uh some of these
conversations to resolve theemotional dysregulation are not
comfortable or easyconversations to necessarily
have, but so criticallyimportant.
Tim Newman (28:46):
And and you know you you you got to see some of
these types of conversationswhen you were really young.
Um your mom owned a large uhhair salon and and you you
worked in there and you youworked the front desk.
So you were the first personthat that the clients came in to
see.
How did how did that reallykind of shape your um
(29:08):
communication strategy, youryour mindset, your business
strategy, and and and how didthat kind of evolve?
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (29:16):
I wouldn't have said this at the
time, but looking back, the factthat we had 300 clients a week
coming in through those doors,and I was very often the first
person that they would see.
I had two telephone linescoming in, and I would need to
assess very, very quickly fromtheir body language how they
(29:38):
were looking, moving, breathing,what they were saying, exactly
where they were at, so that Icould meet them with where they
were at and have the mostinfluential and positive impact
on that communication that I hadwith them.
And so I so I I one of thethings that I take away master.
(30:01):
And I've worked there from theage of 12 to 21.
So one of the things that Ithink I really took away from
that was this how do wecommunicate, how do we read
people?
And um and therefore how do weadapt our communication styles
so that we can have positiveoutcomes and be implementing
(30:24):
positively with them.
Yeah.
Tim Newman (30:27):
Yeah, and and and it's I I think it's so important
to learn that at a young age.
And obviously you had a goodrole model with your mom and be
and being a business owner andunderstanding that you know you
you can't just blow it off.
And it's important and it'sit's it's important for any
number of reasons, but you know,in in in that case, it's
important to um you know, forfor the bottom line for the
(30:49):
business, it's also importantfor for the the customer to be
able to um or the stylist to beable to communicate and w with
the with the customer to givethem what they wanted to get
them to to relax so that theycould actually give give them
the the services that that theyneeded.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (31:06):
Ah, absolutely.
And you know, we'd have a we'dhave such a variety of different
customers coming in, we'd havea solicitor that would come in
and make sure that her hair wasdone before she was in court any
time that she was going intocourt.
She was very needed to be youknow dealt with very
proficiently, very veryeffectively, didn't want to mess
around, everything you knowneeded to be just right, and she
(31:29):
wanted to be in and out.
And then you had people who didcome in and they might be
really, really nervous, peoplewho've not had their hair cut in
in years and are coming in fora restyle, and they're you know,
they're they're feeling quitenervous about what that might
be, and and everything inbetween.
I I think another thing for meabout working in the salon,
(31:50):
which carries on in the workthat I do today, is the way that
you can really help to have apositive impact on others.
I'll never forget answering thephone one day, and it was a
woman who had cancer.
(32:11):
She was having chemotherapy andshe'd lost the hair.
And her family had clubbedtogether to buy her a real hair
wig to give her the confidenceto be able to go out.
Um, but this real hair wig wasvery tatty, it wasn't in any
shape or style that particularlysuited her, and she knew it
(32:33):
needed to be cut.
Well, unlike real hair, you cuta wig once, it's not burnt
black.
Right.
She was saying to me, you know,I'm just very nervous about
this.
Like, what can I do?
Or I've never been to see youbefore.
And I said, you know, thatthere's one person I want to
book you in to look at.
And she was also very um, sheshe she also wanted it to be
(32:54):
kept private as well.
So she didn't be sitting, youknow, in a salon with people
seeing through the windows ofwhat was being done.
So we kept the salon open laterthat night, and she came right
at the end of the day, and andmy mum, of course, looked after
her.
Um, and the transformation inthat woman and her energy and
(33:17):
going out with her new real hairwig in a cut and a shape that
just made her feel a milliondollars was just incredible.
And and that happened all thetime, right?
It wasn't that's that storystands out for me be because of
it, but it that happened all thetime, you know.
You'd see people coming in alittle bit stressed or a bit
(33:40):
frazzled or and them going out,you know, feeling calm and
refreshed and just like, oh, Ifeel so much better.
Tim Newman (33:46):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (33:47):
And um, and and I and I and I love
that that as human beings we getto be able to support one
another in those kind of ways.
Tim Newman (33:55):
Yeah, and it especially in that situation,
and and it and I say that, butyou know, it goes for any number
of just different situationswhere where somebody just wants
to be heard, they they want theywant people to to to just hear
them.
And it that just by by justfeeling heard, you know, feeling
listened to, that changes theirmindset altogether.
(34:18):
Um even if you couldn't havehelped her, if you had tried and
d and done those things, shewould have felt so much better.
But in in that situation, uh,you know, going through what
she's going through, thatprobably, you know, that
probably changed her life,honestly.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (34:36):
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I and I'm in the fortunateposition that there has been
many people that have changedthe trajectory of my life in
very positive ways.
Um and I I I I know you've gotsome exciting news coming up in
terms of the coaching and thespeaking and the training that
(34:57):
you're qualified in now as well,Tim.
You perhaps tell us a bit aboutthat in just a second.
Um and uh because I really dobelieve in that personal
development journey.
And uh and let me add this thatpersonal development journey,
(35:19):
not just so not just so it's notabout necessarily what we get
or we achieve, but it's aboutwho we become in the process and
what we do with that.
I think that's the thing, it'snot just about the
self-actualization and this, youknow, that fulfillment.
That's a really important partof what we're doing, but it's
then how do we then show up asthe leaders our world needs
(35:42):
right now?
Tim Newman (35:43):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (35:44):
And so it's it it's it's bringing that
back to you know, reporting forduty with our families, with
our communities, in ourorganizations, and being able to
show up as as the best that wecan.
And what I was gonna say wasthose people that have touched
my I've I've been fortunate towork with some of the best
coaches in the world, and um,and I have I have three mentors
(36:07):
that I see and speak toregularly, and that there is the
the the podcasts and things,you know, this type of thing are
so wonderful.
And I would encourage people tobe fertilizing their minds with
you know, kind of good sourcesof information and um continuing
(36:33):
to find courage and be braveand to operate in that amber
zone, you know, so we know thegreen zone is that comfort zone.
It's not about being in the redzone and being completely
stressed and you know, but howdo we spend more of our time in
that amber zone where we are,you know, we are stretching, we
are becoming, we are evolvingwho we are.
(36:53):
And um with that view of how dowe how do we better serve?
Tim Newman (37:00):
Yeah, and that and again, that that's the key.
I mean you can you can havementors, you can take classes,
you can listen to podcasts, youcan do all those things, but if
you don't actually put it intoaction, if you don't actually
step outside your house andactually use that and and again
connect with people and treatthem with love, kindness, and
(37:21):
respect, then what it's you youhaven't done anything.
You you it it's just become anabstract idea.
It's it's actually doing thatand touching people and and
becoming who you say you want towant to actually be.
It's so it's so important toactually do it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (37:38):
And coming back to what you were
asking me about right at thebeginning and my story, I didn't
always feel like it waspossible for me to become the
person that I am now.
If you can imagine, you know,going back to that point where I
was in that corporate role.
And even when I decided that Iwanted to leave the corporate
world and start my own business,it was shrouded in in doubt and
(38:02):
um fear and questioning aboutwhether I could or uh I would be
capable of doing that.
And and it's not even been astraight line since then.
Tim Newman (38:15):
Right.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (38:16):
You know, and uh a couple of very
quick stories, but I think thatlife does test us.
Um I had decided to leave thecorporate world and very
fortunately had an offer of umof a redundancy situation, a
settlement agreement through thethrough the company.
They were restructuring theteams again, and my role wasn't
(38:37):
going to exist the way that ithad been existing.
And um, so that was an optionfor me to take.
And the day before I signedthat paperwork, my husband and I
found out that we were pregnantwith our first child.
Tim Newman (38:50):
That's awesome.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (38:52):
It's awesome.
It's also incredibly fun, youknow, kind of start a business
with a baby in my arms.
I'm already gonna do this.
Um, and um, you know, so thatwas that was one challenge
initially.
And I think sometimes we can'talways see the road ahead
clearly, but to trust and takethose first steps, always I
(39:13):
always remember it feeling likeI was at this edge of a misty
lake.
And I there were steppingstones across the lake, but all
I could see was the firststepping stone, and it's I can't
see where I'm going.
Like, I don't know how this isgonna work, how I'm gonna have a
baby and build this businessand and and and somehow when you
commit to that first step, moreof the mist lifts, and you see
(39:36):
with greater clarity the nextstep, and then the next step,
and then you know, eventually itbecomes clearer and clearer
where you're headed and whatyou're doing.
But sometimes you have to takethat leap and that that that
step forwards and trust thatyou're following your heart and
doing the right thing.
And um COVID was another timewhere I lost 95% of my business
(40:00):
overnight during COVID andeffectively had to rebuild
again.
And I've rebuilt better andstronger, and the business is
doing better now than it hadever done pre-COVID.
Uh, but you know, it that was areal tough 12 months, 12, 18
months, really, really tough.
And you start to question, canI do this?
(40:22):
That's where the coaches andthe mentors are really important
to keep it.
Tim Newman (40:27):
Really important.
Because, you know, the thatinner voice is you telling
yourself that you can't do it orthat you know you shouldn't do
it because of this, that, or theother thing.
And and having people withinyour inner circle that are in
and I'm not saying that you needor should have people in your
inner circle that are yespeople, oh yeah, you're the
greatest thing ever.
(40:47):
Yes, you can do it, yes, youcan do it.
Don't worry about it, you'vegot this.
But having people in your innercircle that you can actually
trust that are going to hit youstraight with whatever it is,
yes, you yes, you can do it.
These are the things that youneed to look at, these are the
things that you need to planforward, need to approach and
and and address.
If you do those things, yes,you can do this.
Um, it's not all gonna be, youknow, red roses, right?
(41:11):
It's it there's going to bebumps in the road.
But having people in your innercircle who are gonna shoot you
straight and help you get overthat inner dialogue that is the
one that's really keeping usdown, is it's critical.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (41:24):
My coach calls it fierce empathy,
which I like.
It's like it's it's likesimultaneously I have the
ability to kick you up the arsewhile giving you a massive hug.
I'm like, yeah, you do, you do.
And and I message I messagedone of my mentors earlier this
week, and I was like, can youtake a look at this?
So it's something that I'dproduced, and I was like, I want
(41:44):
you to, I want you to tell melike where's the BS in this,
right?
And how can I make it even moretrue?
And you know, uh that they areyou you need you absolutely do
you need that.
Tim Newman (41:59):
Yeah.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (42:00):
Always within my within my coaching, I
will whatever I do is from aplace of compassion and love.
But sometimes we all needcalling out.
Tim Newman (42:09):
Exactly.
Oh no, absolutely.
And and it's it's I I I I thinkyou know, people get they they
confuse things.
They they confuse the the ideaof support with telling you
everything's gonna be okay whenguess what?
Sometimes it it may not beokay, right?
But but I'm going to be therewith you to help you get through
(42:32):
it, right?
There that's that extra extrastep.
And you know, my wife and I arevery, very different people.
Um she's a nurturer.
I mean, she'll come and she'llrub your back and you know, tell
you it's gonna be okay andwe'll get you through it.
And I'm just I I'm the directperson.
Okay.
We these are things that theseare the steps that have to be
(42:52):
taken.
Let's just put your boots on,let's let's let's trudge on
through trudge on through it.
I'm with you, but I'm not I'mnot gonna be the guy that that
that's you know, ru rubbing yourback.
So, you know, there's there'sdifferent ways of of being that
support system and and and youknow helping people through it,
(43:12):
but don't confuse the idea of umsupport with just telling you
everything's gonna be okay,because that's not it's not
being honest.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (43:22):
No, no, absolutely.
And this will tie into uh, youknow, I know you've done a huge
amount of work um with uh withJohn Maxwell and um and
congratulations because Ibelieve you've got a very
important date coming up soon.
Tim Newman (43:38):
Yeah, we've we've I've got some some really good
things coming up this thisweekend, and um it it to me it's
it it goes back to tomentorship and and proximity, be
you know, be in having peoplein your inner circle that uh are
of like mind, that um are doingthe things that you want to do,
that you can um uh go feed offof them.
(44:01):
But again, it's it's not thatI'm just sucking everything out.
I also have to provide valueback to them as well, right?
That that's that's that's alsosomething that I think is
forgotten in terms of umcoaching, networking, and
mentoring.
Um you still have to providevalue back to those people that
are providing you value.
And um th this weekend for meis it's I I've been looking
(44:21):
forward to it for about sixmonths.
Um and uh I I don't want togive too much away, but uh when
so I I just put out a uh uh theepisode that came out this
morning, actually.
So so this episode is gonnacome out in in a few weeks.
The episode I put out thismorning, I told people in that
episode that, you know, I'mgonna have a big announcement
(44:44):
here in two weeks.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (44:44):
And we're going to MyState.
Tim Newman (44:49):
That's okay.
That's okay.
So I'm excited about it.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (44:52):
And now you'll know by the time this
comes out, people will it'svery exciting.
Tim Newman (44:58):
It is.
And you know, it's um again, soit's things don't just happen
either, right?
You have to actually put in thework, and that's that's an
another key distinction um thatthat I think some of the younger
generations miss.
And I'm not I'm not bashing yosome of the younger generations,
but it's the the idea thatthere's expectations or there's
(45:20):
um entitlement.
You you have to actually do thework.
You have to actually putyourself out there, do the hard
things, do the things thatyou're uncomfortable doing, and
get through it and get to theother side, and then you can
look back and say, wow, numberone, it wasn't that hard.
Number two, I've grown so muchfrom it.
Number number three, I'velearned so much from it.
(45:41):
Number four, I can startproviding people with so much
more value and helping peoplethat you know I may not have
been able to help before on andon and on.
Rachael Edmondson-C (45:50):
Absolutely.
Are you talking about um thatmentality, that go-giver
mentality that you weredescribing there, and how
important it is not just to goto networks and um people to
get, but also to give.
I don't know if you read thisbook, but um it's one that I
love that's by um Bud Berg andJohn David Mann.
(46:14):
It's called The Go-Giver.
Great, great, not a big book.
It's um it's it's a it's alittle story, um, but it's all
about that go-giver, I thatgo-giver mentality and idea.
And I just I I love it.
And and this is what I this iswhat I have applied in my 10
years of business, and it servedme really, really well.
Tim Newman (46:39):
That's I just wrote that down, it's gonna be the
next the the next book.
That's it.
Thank you so much.
Rachel, we we didn't even getto half the things that we want
to talk to, so um, we're gonnahave to schedule more time.
If if if if you have more time,um, I'd I'd love to to get you
scheduled back on and and um youknow finish this discussion.
I I I think you and I couldtalk for for for days and days.
(47:02):
Um I you know it's there's somuch synergy there.
And and I you again, you youbring so so much good
information and value.
Uh I'd again I'd love to getyou back on.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (47:14):
Oh gosh, Tim, I would love to join
you.
And if anything that we've beentalking about today has
resonated with any of yourlisteners, I have got something
practical that they would beable to take away.
Have you got just a couple ofquestions?
Tim Newman (47:27):
Oh yes, ma'am, please, please share.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (47:29):
Yes, okay.
So I have created a very simpletool called the pause.
It's just five questions, butthey're the kind that can cut
through the noise that I wasdescribing that can really leave
you feeling overwhelmed and umand stressed out and anxious,
and they can help you lead fromthat place of truth, not fear.
(47:50):
So if anybody would like that,they can download it for free at
l of r.co.uk.
That's e-l-l-e-v-ar-r.
Um, or connect with me onLinkedIn, and I'd be very happy
to send that with um with anyonewho wants a little more clarity
and calm in the middle of whatis often very chaotic.
(48:12):
And Tim, perhaps we can alsomake sure that those links are
with the show notes as well forpeople to easily find.
Tim Newman (48:17):
Yes, I'll I will make sure that those are in the
show notes.
Um thank you so much for forthat resource.
I again it's it's somethingthat I I I know is gonna help
help our listeners.
And that's one of the thingsthat that I love about our
guests.
You know, they they they giveour listeners something that as
soon as they listen to theepisode, they can go and start
(48:38):
putting into practice today.
Don't wait.
Put it into practice today andwatch, watch how your how your
life changes.
What you know, what watch howyour communication changes,
watch how your leadershipchanges, watch, watch how it how
it affects the people that arearound you.
It's it's very impactful.
Thank you so much.
Rachael Edmondson-Clarke (48:58):
Tim, thank you for all you bring and
all you do, and I will bedelighted to come and join you
again.
Thank you.
Tim Newman (49:04):
Awesome.
Thank you so much, and and uhwe'll we'll talk soon.
Be sure to visitspeakingwithconfidence
podcast.com to get your freeebook, Top 21 Challenges for
Public Speakers and How toOvercome.
You can also register for theForum for Public Speaking Forum.
Always remember your voice is apower changer.
We'll talk to you next time.
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