April 28, 2025 • 60 mins
What happens when you finally find the courage to walk away from a decade of "familiar chaos" and reclaim your authentic self? Maggie Boillot story will stop you in your tracks and make you question what comfortable prisons you might be living in right now.
Maggie joins us to share her remarkable transformation from successful hairstylist and fitness studio owner to becoming a powerful voice for women seeking to rewrite their stories. With magnetic energy and hard-earned wisdom, she reveals how leaving behind a toxic relationship that had held her hostage for ten years became the catalyst for discovering her true calling as a mentor, speaker, and podcaster.
At the heart of our conversation is Maggie's revolutionary "AWARE" technique—a practical framework anyone can use to navigate life's challenging crossroads. Acknowledge what's happening, become Willing to change, check for Alignment with your true feelings, Release what doesn't serve you, and Experience something new. This simple but profound approach strips away the confusion that keeps us stuck in situations long past their expiration date.
What makes this episode essential listening is how Maggie dismantles our conditioned fear of failure. "You can't get it wrong," she insists. "You're just going to get the feedback you needed to make the shifts." This perspective transforms paralyzing perfectionism into liberating experimentation, giving us permission to pursue dreams without the crushing weight of potential disappointment.
The distinction Maggie draws between passion and purpose offers clarity for anyone feeling successful yet unfulfilled. Purpose, she explains, is your calling—the impact you're meant to have—while passion relates to how your daily life feels. Understanding this difference helps explain why external achievements often fail to deliver the satisfaction we expect.
Ready to stop comparing your day one to someone else's year ten? Want to recognize when you're choosing familiar discomfort over unknown possibilities? Join us for this transformative conversation that might just be the permission slip you need to start stomping to your own drum. As Maggie reminds us: "Your uniqueness is your superpower." It's time to embrace it.
Music "STOMP" used by permission of artist Donica Knight Holdman and Jim Huff
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
I'm walking all alone down my yellow brick road and I
stomp to the beat of my owndrum.
I got my pockets full of dreamsand they're busting at the
seams, going boom, boom boom.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Welcome to Stacked Keys Podcast.
I'm your host, amy Stackhouse.
This is a podcast to featurewomen who are impressive in the
work world or in raising afamily, or who have hobbies that
make us all feel encouraged.
Want to hear what makes thesewomen passionate to get up in
the morning, or what maybe theywish they'd known a little bit
(00:42):
earlier in their lives.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Grab your keys and stomp to your own drum.
Whatever you do, it ain'tnothing on me, because I'm doing
my thing and I hold the key toall my wants and all my dreams
Like an old song everything willbe all right when I let myself
(01:20):
go Well.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Today I am excited to introduce a guest, maggie Bio.
Welcome, maggie.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
I'm so excited to be here.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Oh thrilled to have you, and right out of the gate.
Let's start off with Maggie.
How do people know you, bothpersonally and professionally?
Speaker 3 (01:40):
That's a great question.
I love that.
So, so I have, uh, a lot ofenthusiasm.
I have a very brightpersonality, and so I was a
hairstylist for 19 years, um,and also owned a fitness studio
for 10 years, and I just hadthis bright light about me that,
um, once I was in front ofpeople, my magnetic energy came
(02:02):
out.
Um, and then also you know,that's kind of personally I'm
quirky, fun, exciting, love tobe playful and fun.
And then professionally, Iactually have now taken off the
hairstylist cape and also thefitness journey, and I have
stepped into being a podcaster,speaker and mentor through life
(02:23):
experiences that have basicallygiven me a degree of hard knocks
and I like to teach, as thementor that I am is all about
experience and that you canbecome your own self-awareness
tool to be able to change yourlife and rewrite your story.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Oh wow, All right.
So teaching that you must havehad some mentors along your way
to where you could see someimportance and validity to that.
What kind of mentors did you?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
have.
So it's it's funny that youasked that when I first was out
of my very rough, abusive, toxicrelationship, I really didn't
have any mentors and I was doinga lot of it on my own.
I really feel like a lot oftimes healing comes from within.
Hence, all of the umbrellasthat I kind of teach from is the
(03:15):
power is within us.
And, yes, we need mentors andcoaches and guiders, but a lot
of times it comes from your ownself-awareness.
And so when I kind of started tosolidify the decision of
walking away from the careerthat I had to become this
speaker, you know mentor andpodcaster I started looking into
(03:36):
hiring people and you knowcoaches and mentors I have to
speak this out because I havealso had this happen to me where
you have to speak this outbecause I have also had this
happen to me where you have toalign 100% with their product,
their knowledge, their basis,all of the things, because you
can quickly get into the wrongsituations.
(03:57):
Um and I think that becomesanother thing of self-awareness
Um, I was in a relationship withmy business partner or business
coach, I should say and Iquickly realized I think I might
be in that toxic relationshipthat I got myself out of so with
coaches and mentors, it's veryimportant to pick the ones that
(04:17):
have the most alignment withyour values, your, you know,
your, your desires and yourwants.
Cause it can.
It can really be the thedeciding factor whether you keep
going after the life that youtruly want or it kind of holds
you back.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Wow.
So do you have a method thatyou would suggest, or that
you've kind of figured out, tobe able to find that alignment,
because you know you could?
You could waste six monthsfiguring out.
Hey, we don't really jive onwhat we're saying here.
So how have you come up with amethod?
Speaker 3 (04:56):
You know.
So I have lots of differentmethods in my world around the
awareness factor and really,truly, we all have that inner
voice, that inner guidance, andI think that a lot of times I'm
actually crafting some of thisinto my keynote is we have the
(05:16):
answers pretty much right infront of our face, but most
oftentimes we kind of look tothe left or look to the right,
thinking maybe it's, maybe it'sokay, but really I think it
comes from what does your bodyfeel like, what does your
mindset feel like, what doesyour attitude feel like?
And if, if they don't feel good,if they don't feel aligned and
(05:38):
you kind of feel like a wobblyold mess and you're kind of I I
was doing this myself, beatingmy head up against a wall,
sometimes trying to figure outlike what is what's, why can't I
figure out this, why can't Ifigure it out?
It's probably not an alignment.
So I like to talk about justfeelings.
How are you talking to yourselfabout it?
(05:59):
Is it making you feel crazy?
Is it making you questionyourself?
And then you get to have thatas your feedback.
And I also like to say that noinvestment or no mentor is a
good, bad, right or wrongexperience.
It's just the feedback that youneed in that very moment of
your life.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Oh wow, you know you mentioned self-talk there.
So in talking to yourself areyou a self-talker.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yes, I am getting much better about positive
self-talk instead of negativeself-talk or that
self-sabotaging talk, and it isa practice.
It's a daily practice and Ithink a lot of people think that
with positive self-talk, it'sjust about.
You know, I can do it once in awhile and we really need to
(06:50):
start to spot them, our thoughts, as soon as we start to have
them, and if we think I'm sayingsomething that's more on the
negative side, you just have tosay to yourself you know not
right now and and replace itwith a new, new thought and I do
that a lot.
I think sometimes I'm like, ah,you know, start to kind of beat
(07:10):
myself up inside.
But really that self compassionand self talk is so, so, so
important, especially whenyou're trying to align with the
next best version of yourself ona daily basis, with the next
best version of yourself on adaily basis.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yeah Well, what you've done is a little bit
scary.
I mean, you had two careersthat were pretty solid, that
people are always into and theyunderstand.
You know, it's like I am ahairdresser.
I work with hair Okay, I have avisual picture of what that is.
I know what you do.
I work in fitness Okay, whatkind?
(07:45):
All, right, now I have a visualpicture of that.
You jumped off into somethingthat people are like huh, so how
does that feel?
Speaker 3 (08:04):
How do you wrap your head around that?
And not oh what, what did I do?
Yeah, um, I think it comes from.
I talk a lot about three wordscourage, trust and strength, but
the I think courage on this oneis my answer.
Um, courage to be able to trustyourself um enough and know
that anything in life is anopportunity to make a decision
(08:29):
that could change your lifeforever.
And I was kind of living in theyou know, when we're going in
through what do you want to beas an adult and what do you want
?
It was like, well, I don'treally know.
I don't want to go to college,so I picked hairstyling.
I quickly just fell into it.
You know, I don't think I everreally truly had this ultimate
(08:50):
passion for it, and then withfitness, I have a huge passion
for it.
So it still is very court, likekind of combined into a lot of
the things that I do withcoaching and mentoring.
But that was stripped away fromme when I did make the
courageous decision to leavebehind the life that I thought I
had created.
(09:10):
But I just knew that I had totrust myself enough to
understand what I had beenallowing for a decade of my life
was actually molding me intothis person, and I could either
surrender and let go of the pastand forgive the past that I had
(09:33):
gone through, or I could holdonto it and have it keep me
hostage.
And that's what it was doingfor 10 years, was I was held
hostage of someone else's dream,someone else's life, someone
else's passion?
Yes, did I have the passionsfor it, but was it mine and was
it the true, aligned direction Iwas supposed to take?
(09:54):
No, and that again goes to thehow do you feel?
Were you waking up every day,miserable, trying to figure out
why the heck you felt so bad andtrying to always question
yourself?
That's when you know you're.
You're just not meant to be inthat place.
And that's one of the things Italk about is power shifting,
and you have to be in your ownpower to say you know what I
(10:15):
don't like this and I need tomake the shifts harder.
Hard or not, worth it or not,no one knows, but you have to
trust yourself to try it yeah,wow.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Well, you're young and so, but you've got all this
life experience.
Do you ever find yourself andlook in the mirror and go, oh,
what am I doing?
And feel that I guess it'scalled imposter syndrome of like
maybe I shouldn't be the onetelling you, you know, coaching
(10:48):
along.
Do you ever have those feelings?
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Oh gosh, yes, and I think that's a natural, normal
person.
You know, we think we don'thave a story to tell.
We think we don't have anexperience that is bigger or
cooler than the other person,have an experience that is
bigger or cooler than the otherperson.
We tend to also compare ourjourney at our day one, or our
even year one, to someone'sjourney of 10 years into what
(11:16):
they're doing, and so that, Ithink, is a big part of the
picture.
I am very guilty of doing thatwhere it's like well, how do
they have all these clients, howdo they have this and why are
they doing it this way at all?
I want that, I want that, but Ialso like to think of that as
that's your inspiration.
If those are the things thatare calling to you, it means
they're on your heart and thatthey're meant for you as well.
(11:38):
So it's not about comparingyourself.
It's about how do I take theaction.
Comparing yourself it's abouthow do I take the action.
How do I get myself into thatposition?
Because I think a lot of times,comparison is just jealousy,
because you want to be there,you know, you're like, ah, I
want to do that.
And so, instead of it beingcomparing and having the
(12:00):
jealousy feeling, think of it aslike this is what is in your
forefront.
That's almost your higher selfreaching to you to say this is
what you want.
And that's almost your higherself reaching to you to say this
is what you want.
And I'm here to show you thatit's possible for you to.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
So what would you say ?
The difference between wishingand realizing your dreams might
be.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Ooh, um, this might have to kind of drop in for me
for a second.
Um, I think a wish is a desireand I say this over and over and
I'll say it till I'm blue inthe face.
What you desire, you deservefor something to happen.
(12:45):
I think you sit with that andyou think about it.
You have to do the wholealignment check again.
You know how does it make youfeel.
If it's something that lightsyou up and you feel that it's a
desire for you to have it,whether it's be coaching,
mentoring, owning your ownbusiness, stepping into a
completely different world, likeI did, you have to decide.
You have to say to yourself isthis something that I'm wishing
(13:06):
for, or is it something that Ireally, truly want to do?
And here to tell you failureand setbacks and all the things
are going to happen, but it'skind of facing that and doing it
anyways, and then trulyreminding yourself that if it
doesn't feel aligned and itdoesn't feel good, that is the
decision you can make.
(13:27):
Again to say, what else can Itry?
And I think that's where mostpeople get stuck is they think I
have this dream or I have thiswish, but how do I get there and
no one knows.
We're all figuring it out.
No one's different than anybodythe people who are where you
(13:51):
want to be.
The difference is is they justtook the steps and they got
bumped backwards or sideways andthey continued to just say that
it wasn't just a desire or awish.
It was the dream that they weresupposed to fulfill for
themselves.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
And with that takes a lot of work.
From what I'm hearing, Twosteps forward, one step back,
two steps forward, three stepssideways.
I mean that just it just soundslike it's kind of a give and
take pull that you embrace.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Absolutely, and I always say, like life is a dance
, and also, too, it takesimperfect bravery we don't have.
There's no perfect time,there's no perfect setting,
there's no perfect experience,there's no perfect mapped out
road.
Most of us want that, like,here's the yellow brick road
(14:41):
that we get to follow and wejust know that on the other side
of that is that pot of gold orwhatever we're looking for, and
it's just not that way.
And I think that that's anotherthing that scares people off of
following their heart and theirpassions, because it's not a
linear path, it is bumpy and itdoes require, like you said,
give and take, push and pull,dust yourself off and continue
(15:04):
to pull yourself up, because alot of times I always say this
too we fear the unknown, becauseit's uncertain, but we're not
fearful of the chaos that welive every day.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Well, that's interesting.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
Yeah, that's what I say all the time.
It's like we love to stay inthis familiar certain chaos
because we're uncertain of thebeauty that could be right here
on the other side of that.
One courageous step to changeyour life.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Wow.
So what would you say is thebiggest?
Speaker 3 (15:48):
waste of time.
Overthinking andprocrastinating.
I do it all the time too.
Still, I mean it's a waste oftime, it really is.
Overthinking andprocrastinating is just another
form of perfectionism.
I think, or I know that, and,like I just mentioned, perfect
is actually boring.
(16:09):
And if we were all perfectwhich, by the way, nothing in
life is perfect, and that'sactually the beauty in this
world is that we're allimperfect humans doing the best
that we can with the knowledgethat's at our fingertips.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
You mentioned the word failure a little while ago
and it's like failure sometimescan make you pause and not want
to go forward.
How do you feel about failure?
Speaker 3 (16:43):
You know, when I first started the journey called
life failure, to me it didn'tseem like anything.
You know, when you're a kidit's kind of like we failed at a
game or we did and we just keptgoing.
You know, we were like, we wereresilient, I feel, and we tend
to overthink as we get to beadults and we think that failure
is really truly the disaster.
(17:04):
It's the point of it didn'twork, it's never going to work.
But if you think about a lot ofpeople in this world I mean
even like I think somebodyreferenced, you know, the light
bulb.
I think it took him like,however many thousands of tries,
and if he would have given upwe probably wouldn't still have
light bulb.
So we have to think aboutfailure as I used to think, as
(17:24):
failure was.
It's not meant for me, it's toohard, it's not worth it.
And now failure to me is thatredirect I talk about.
Sometimes it's the beauty andthe blessing in the skies that
comes through that failure andit's also feedback.
It's feedback for you to eithersay, man, I learned from this
(17:47):
and I can grow from it, or I canlet this be the thing that just
stops me dead in my tracks.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yeah Well, so much of what you've talked about so far
takes a great deal of thoughtand kind of raking through and
getting rid of the negative andreaching for more and so many
different subjects.
What subject or aspect reallymakes your brain just ache?
Speaker 3 (18:23):
So I think in my world, what makes me just like
cringe a lot of times and acheand and and honestly feel for
people is awareness, and that iswhy one of my biggest
modalities and biggest trainingsI ever do with people is one
(18:44):
simple word and it's aware, andit's a way of, it's a technique
to with any experience I'mtalking any experience and any
emotion or any thought or anyfeeling.
You can work through one simpleword and that's awareness, and
I talk it, I just work youthrough it.
The A stands for you know, wecan work through that.
(19:06):
If you want, I can kind of diveinto that a little bit or we
can.
Okay, so think of it this way.
Like I've mentioned three orfour times, everything in life
is feedback, right, we.
Nothing in life really is good,bad, right or wrong.
It's just our own perspectiveand our own experience we all
talk about.
I always like to reference thisbecause it's a very easy
(19:29):
reference.
If you go to a movie and I goto the same movie, you come out
and you're like gosh, that wasthe best movie I've ever seen
and I'm like, wow, I reallydidn't catch it.
I didn't like it.
Perspective, that's awareness,that's your self-awareness
around.
I loved this movie and mine was.
I didn't really care for it.
So good, bad, right, wrong.
(19:49):
There's neutrality in themiddle Right, and so I like to
work through aware.
With this simple word you cando this with anything.
Is you have to be aware, oracknowledge what's in front of
you.
Is it helping you, or is itcreating chaos?
Or is it what?
Is it right?
We have to acknowledge it,because first step of awareness
(20:13):
and change is acknowledgingbehaviors and then willingness.
So we go to the W, we go forwillingness to change.
We have to tell ourselves arewe lying to ourselves and we're
trying to make things work andwe're trying to push the peg
into a round you know, round peginto a square hole, trying to
figure all these things out?
If it's not working and it'sfeeling like that, you have to
(20:36):
have willingness to move throughit.
And then that comes to the nextA, which is alignment, that
feeling that we've talked about.
How does it make you feel?
Are you feeling confident?
Are you feeling excited?
Are you feeling motivated?
Are you feeling driven or areyou beating your head up against
the wall, like I was for a longtime?
And then you have to be able torelease what doesn't serve you.
(21:02):
What is it the thought?
Is it the emotion?
Is it the action?
Cause you got to release itbecause it's going to hold you
hostage if you don't.
And then the E leads us intoexperience.
Go out and experience somethingelse.
It's just like pieces ofclothing.
If you feel like they don't fitanymore, what do you do?
You go buy a new shirt.
(21:23):
So you can do that with anyexperience in your life.
If it doesn't feel right, itdoesn't fit into your life, it
doesn't work anymore.
Try something else on, take anew experience, and you will
never know what opportunityholds the key to changing your
life wow and that's great.
(21:44):
That's my aware technique andthat's just like I said.
You can literally do this withany, anything throughout the day
.
I mean five different timesevery day.
I go.
Let me get aware.
How am I feeling, how it alsocan help you to not be so
reactive.
It can help you to not be soreactive.
It can help you to become morealigned and more slower.
(22:07):
You know, kind of starteddressing.
How does this make me feel?
Because if we're not aware,we're never going to change.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Right.
So, is it callous?
Is it this?
Is it calculating everythingthat comes through, and does it
make you more, less feelingabout situations or events?
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to say less feeling, I
think it actually makes you feelmore.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Permission, I guess.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Yeah, it gives you permission to understand, like
I've been saying, that good, bad, right, wrong.
What if you went about lifeknowing you can't get it wrong?
You know, if you went aboutyour day, instead of the fear of
the unknown, the fear of thefailure, the fear of the
uncertainty, if you knew eachday what you were doing, you
(23:04):
couldn't get it wrong, you werejust going to get the feedback
that you needed to make theshifts.
What would, how would you liveyour life differently?
And that's how I started living.
My life is living it worriedand fearful of like, well,
what's he going to think if Ileft?
Or what's my business going tothink if I just pick up and
(23:24):
leave?
What are my clients going tothink if I just want to not do
hair anymore?
You can't get it wrong.
You have to just decide.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, you know, my mind went to being a parent, a
young parent, and you know whoyou surround yourself with of
like, whether you're using cloth, diapers or paper, or whether
you're nursing or using formula,or whether you're giving
vegetables or you're givingfruits or you're letting them
(23:57):
play here or play there, and youcan every situation go well,
there's one right way, and whenyou find out, no, there's a
million right ways, and so it'skind of that same thing.
You kind of embrace the freedomof making a choice because you
(24:18):
know you use formula or younurse, if you don't starve them,
they're fine, and somehowthey'll grow up to be great
adults, and so it just it's theweight that we put on things
sometimes can be so unbearable.
So do you think our dailyactions kind of make us who we
(24:39):
are?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
100%, 100% Because you know, I'll even think about
my daily actions.
Five years ago, my dailyactions were I rolled out of bed
.
I said, oh God, here we goagain, but I still pushed my.
You know, I still did my dailyactions.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:59):
But I was.
It was almost like walking thatyellow brick road we talked
about, but it was like this road.
That was just like normal,robotic.
It was, oh, I have to do this,this is the way my life is
supposed to be.
This is what I chose.
These are the things I did.
So I just lived that way.
Oh, I have to be cheated on, Ihave to be manipulated.
I have to have that because Iwant this.
(25:21):
So my actions led me to allowthe behaviors because I thought
that was as good as my life got.
And that's what most peoplethink is.
I chose this.
Whether you're married, you'renot, you're engaged, you're this
.
Whatever it is, life changes,people change, opportunities
(25:41):
change, experiences changes.
If it doesn't feel good anymore, that's when you have to use
the aware technique walkyourself through it.
What am I allowing that is notserving me, that is holding me
hostage of living a happier,more fulfilling life.
And I like to always ask thatquestion when you think about
that person, like we kind ofreferenced earlier, if that
(26:04):
person's living that happier,more fulfilling life that you
want, and you look to the rightand you look to the left and you
look forward and you think whois deserving of living that
happier, more fulfilling life,and the first person that comes
to your mind if it isn'tyourself, that's the feedback
you need.
Yeah, wow, you know.
(26:25):
I mean plain and simple.
The first person that shouldcome to that forefront of your
brain is yourself, because we'realways constantly worried about
what everybody else is thinking.
What's the opinion of thisperson, how's this person going
to act?
How's it?
Well, how about we startthinking about ourself first?
And that's a whole debacle wecould get into about.
That's selfish.
How is that selfish If I wantto live a life that is happier
(26:51):
and more fulfilling.
And guess what, if I'm livingthat life, you're going to be
more fulfilled too, because I'mgoing to treat you better.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Yeah, it has a way of coming back.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
Yeah, it has a way of coming back.
Yeah, and also, it could alsohelp that person think, if she's
doing it and the world isn'tcolliding, maybe I could do it
too.
Yeah, so complete this sentencefor me we were put on this earth
to live a happier, morefulfilling life.
(27:22):
I would think that, right there, that's just a mic drop for me.
Like we, we were put on thisplanet to live a happy, healthy,
fulfilling life and, honestly,I think it's through passion and
purpose, and each of us has hada dream that is either dropped
into us I like to say wisdomshowers, I like to say when
(27:46):
you're sleeping the thingsaround you, the opportunities,
the synchronicities.
I believe that there is a paththat we are meant to be taking
and the redirects are there toput you on your most aligned
path, but it also takes theawareness and the willingness to
be able to try that out.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah, you said passion and purpose, meaning
that there's two, that those aretwo, those can be two different
things.
So what do you, how do you feelabout passion and then how do
you feel about purpose?
Kind of define those for me andthen how do you feel about
purpose, kind of define thosefor me?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Yeah, so for me, I think, passion comes from
everything in between.
Your purpose Do you?
Are you passionate about yourlife?
Are you passionate about yourpartner?
Are you passionate about thefuture that you're going for?
And your purpose is yourcalling.
(28:49):
So for me, my purpose is toimpact women.
Right now, specifically, I wouldlove to do a collective, but
right now, my purpose in life isthat I went through what I did
to be able to stand in front ofwomen, mentoring and podcasting
and speaking about my experienceand my life.
That's my purpose, and I thinka lot of times people are like
(29:10):
well, I don't know what mypurpose is.
Well, you went throughsomething in your life that you
are one step ahead of the personthat you could mentor and maybe
that's not because noteverybody wants to be a coach or
a mentor, but there's somethingin your life that brought you
to where you are today and whoyou want to be a coach or a
mentor.
But there's something in yourlife that brought you to where
you are today and who you wantto be.
And a purpose is what has beenput on your heart or in your
(29:33):
forefront, and passion comesfrom.
How does it make you feel?
How does your life look?
Is it?
Are you passionate about wakingup?
And that leads me to my secondtechnique is I talk about?
If you're not aware, you arenot alive.
If you are not alive, you arenot in your own power.
(29:55):
You are letting other peopledictate how your life is going
to look.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Wow.
So you seem really strong andreally focused and I think
there's been a lot of work toget you there.
But growing up, did your familylife, did your mom, kind of
pour into you and begin tocreate this strong, young, young
lady?
Speaker 3 (30:24):
I have always loved my mom dearly and both, both of
my parents were always there forus as kids and I don't ever say
anything, um, differently and Ithink that, yes, I saw the
strength in my mother, but Ialso saw a lot of weakness in my
mom and I think that, um,there's a lot of behaviors that
(30:47):
I might have held on to becauseof what I saw through my own
relationship with my parents andtheir relationship.
And I think that you allowbehaviors because you're like
well I, but I kind of saw thatmodeled and I think for me, the
strength actually truly camefrom, like I mentioned in the
very, very beginning, it was onthe inside of me.
(31:08):
My strength was stripped awayfrom a lot of things in my
childhood and also, too, throughlife experience.
But it's up to you to decide ifyou want to find that again,
because we're all born, becausewe're all born pretty confident,
we're all born prettycourageous.
You know we like to take actionand try to walk and fall and
(31:30):
stumble and walk again, and wetry to talk, and we don't know
how to talk, but we sure dostart to learn how to.
So it's all about where was itstripped away and how can you
then reclaim it, and that's alot about.
What I talk about, too, isrelease, reclaim and rewrite.
If you don't like the narrative, change it.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Well and that takes a lot, a lot of willingness to be
vulnerable with yourself.
So do you kind of prepare to bevulnerable?
And I mean you've done a lot ofthe work, but is it still
ongoing?
Speaker 3 (32:11):
Oh gosh and I think that's one of the biggest
compliments that I get almostdaily is your vulnerability, as
in my, vulnerability is whatmakes people I don't want to say
crumble in a bad way, butcrumble to be able to say you
know what?
I want to start breaking thesebricks down as well.
(32:31):
I want to start moving forward,because if you can be
vulnerable I mean I'm vulnerableevery day and I think that's a
huge part of being in the growthperiod, and growth is not the
destination, it's the journeythat we take each day to step
into that person.
Do I have good days?
Absolutely.
Do I have really good days?
(32:52):
Absolutely.
Do I have really bad days?
You betcha, I do, Becausethat's normal.
That's the imperfect bravery,that's the imperfect person that
you have to be to understandlife.
You know, life is just.
It's just mess.
It's messy and it's meant to bechaotic, but it's also meant to
(33:14):
be the chaoticness or thechaotic crazy that we think is
normal, to show you that there'sactually a way to live in more
peace and harmony and alignmentwith your true, authentic self.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yeah, wow.
So rich can mean so manydifferent things to us.
It can be monetary, it can begetting your career where you
want it to be.
It can be anything.
In what way do you feel rich?
Speaker 3 (33:44):
You know it's interesting.
I was listening to somethingyesterday and it talked about
like, what does money mean toyou, like, what is it going to
feel?
Because you have to feel thatfeeling.
And for me, like mine, isimpact.
And so when I think about, oh,how can I like have this rich
feeling, it's for me, it's thatimpact, it's that feeling of the
(34:05):
vulnerability, the shares andletting people understand that
everybody in life has a story.
We all have a unique way thatwe've walked through life.
But being able to be vulnerableand open up and share about it
and know that you're not aloneis the key to that richness, I
(34:26):
think.
And richness in life doesn'tjust have to be, like you said,
monetary.
The monetary almost kind offlows in when you're in line.
You're in line with you know,you're feeling like you're
floating right.
Things feel good.
It's not effortless, but it'saligned and it feels flowy.
(34:52):
It doesn't feel like Imentioned the heading beating up
against a wall or feeling as ifyou're stumbling over your own
two feet.
It's part of the process andfor richness, I think that
that's such a label for me thatit's about impact and
fulfillment of my own self andbeing able to know that I am out
there each day taking the stepsto leave.
(35:17):
That impact comes with thesimple text messages, the
comments being on podcasts likethese.
Knowing that someone in youraudience or someone in my own
audience feels lighter from whatI said is the richness.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, oh, wow.
Well, you know, being anentrepreneur can be scary,
lonely, frustrating at times, aswell as fulfilling, fabulous
and freeing.
So have you put in place somesystems to kind of protect
yourself, to where you don't godown a dark hole?
Speaker 3 (35:59):
I think I'm working on that right now.
I think, when it comes toentrepreneurship and you know,
being solopreneur really anddoing all the things you do, you
have to protect your energy andyour space.
I mean because half the timeyou know I'm this person, that
person and this person, and eachday I'm like, oh, how do you
juggle it all?
And so I think for me, withthat question, it's like what do
(36:22):
you not feel is your zone ofgenius and I've been told that
from a mentor when I very firststarted this journey was stop
trying to do the things thatdon't give you fulfillment and
maybe you don't have the moneyto do it right away.
And that's one of my things isI'm working through being able
(36:43):
to say, okay, how can Isystemize?
Because I think once yousystemize, things also can start
running in alignment and thingsjust start to happen.
And so for me it's the systemis being kind of placed right
now is how can I be the onethat's out there in my zone of
genius doing the podcasting andspeaking on stages and hosting
(37:06):
retreats and workshops, but alsostill have that backend where
it's like that is not my zone ofgenius?
Computers and things like thatI didn't do it for two decades
of my life.
I'm almost 40.
And now I'm like how do youcreate this?
How do you do it?
And so those are the thingsthat you can eliminate from the
(37:27):
need to have to do until you'rereally ready to do it and focus
on what brings you fulfillmentand passion.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
It's interesting because when I first started my
advertising business, you knowwe focused on small and medium
businesses, because if they werehaving to focus on meeting
everybody that and at that timeeverybody who came in to sell a
billboard or you know some kindof form of media they would
spend a whole day meeting people.
(37:58):
Well then they couldn't dotheir job, their their real work
.
So it's finding that part thattakes up too much of your day.
You know that that can bepassed off to somebody else.
What are you most proud of?
Speaker 3 (38:16):
I think I actually just said this to myself, maybe
even yesterday.
I am proud of not giving up.
Yeah, and I'm talking throughlife.
I mean, like I mentioned evenjust a minute ago, we all have a
story and we all haveexperiences.
Being almost 40, I've had a lotand, like I said, I have a
master's degree in the school ofhard knocks, and so for me,
(38:40):
it's the most proud I have everbeen right now in my life is
that I went through that and Ihave had some bumps along the
road of still standing in mytrue passion and purpose, but
I'm not willing to give up.
I'm not willing to give up.
I didn't give up on a 10 yearlong, decade, toxic, abusive
relationship, so why would Igive up on my dreams?
(39:01):
Why would I give up when itgets tough?
I wasn't willing to let go ofthat toxic certainty.
So why would I give up on thething that means the most to me?
So I'm proud of myself, foreven though I was beating myself
up and beating my head againsta horse or a dead wall or
whatever a dead horse all thethings literally that's how my
(39:26):
brain felt for a while is notgiving up and trusting that in
time and the process, it willall fall together.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
Yeah, trusting time and process, that takes a lot.
That tenacity takes a lot.
So would you say that'sprobably the scariest thing
you've done is not give up onyourself.
Speaker 3 (39:47):
Absolutely.
I think it's been the scariest,the hardest, the most rewarding
all of it in the same breath,because it's your own
perspective each day.
Sometimes, when I don't give up, I'm like why am I not giving
up?
It's hard, but then it's theperspective of who can I impact
and who can I change, or whoselife can I change.
And if the answer continues tofeel like I'm not doing it or it
(40:09):
can't happen, that's thefeedback I need to then be aware
of.
But each morning I still thinkI have a story and I have a
mission and I have a vision ofwho I can and what I want to do
to this world to impact people,to be able to stand in that
truth and to be able to create alife that they have never
thought possible, because I didit Five years ago.
If I could say what my lifelooked like then to what it does
(40:31):
now, people would, you know, dothe huge bug-eyed and the jaw
drop, because it's night and daydifference.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Wow.
So how do you decide whatdirection you're going to go for
your day to have this impact?
How do you do you?
Do you have a a two year, threeyear, five year, 10 year
business plan, or you?
Speaker 3 (41:03):
know how do you figure out your direction?
It goes back to the awarenessand the willingness is what am I
willing to do today that willimpact me for tomorrow and
that's for me right now.
I'm in my connection.
My word of the year isconnection connection, and it's
(41:27):
absolutely insane.
When you live through intentionand you live through what
you're wanting, things juststart to happen.
I mean the people I'veconnected with, the
opportunities I've already hadin my lap and what we're just
now through, two monthsbasically of the year.
You know, and and for me I'venever been much of like a goal
setter, like this is what I'mgoing to do today to get the
goal tomorrow, because a lot oftimes we don't really know, and
I think that that can hinder usa little bit too, because if it
(41:49):
doesn't happen in the timelinethat we thought it would, that's
failure instantly.
Well, if I failed, I didn't getit done in 30 days, well, what
if it takes 60 days?
And so for me, my goals aren'tnecessarily projected.
To say like I'm going to stopon my dreams in three years if
I'm not at a hundred milliondollars, let's just put it
(42:10):
prospectively.
Mine is is what am I willing todo each day to feel like that
still lights me up inside,because when you're doing
something that doesn't reallyfulfill you, why would you're
doing something that doesn'treally fulfill you?
Why would you keep doing it?
I mean, I was living for 10years of something that wasn't
(42:31):
fulfilling me, but I kept doingit because I thought that was
the, that.
It was the choice I made.
I was raising children.
They're not mine, but I was.
You know, I had so many levelsand layers to this molded story
that I thought was my realityand I think that's what a lot of
people do too is as well.
I'll just stay stuck for itCause I have kids, or I'll just
(42:54):
do these things because of this,or I should I heard that the
other day.
Stop shitting on yourself.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
You know it's it's.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
it's really cute because it's like you know we
should on ourselves all the time.
I should be here.
I should have done this.
I should have this by now, whythat's that blinded story that
you've been telling yourself.
Speaker 2 (43:18):
Yeah, yeah, and I guess that's where you know.
You hear people talking aboutthe entitlement.
Should is an entitled word andmaybe that's where there's the
difference.
That's putting, you know,muscle and effort in place of
(43:40):
the word should and patience andtenacity, you know, followed,
you know, with the work of it,perhaps.
What do you fear the most?
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Um, I think it might actually have already been kind
of answered.
I think fear for me is givingup.
Yeah, I fear giving up onmyself.
I fear that because it has beenhard and I think that a lot of
people in this world, like youjust said, kind of entitled, but
it's almost like this sense offacades and fakeness through
(44:19):
Instagram, tiktok, facebook landthat I think a lot of people
think well, because that persondid it and it was 30 days, I can
do that and if I don't, it's afailure and I'm going to give up
on myself and trust me, I'vefallen into the comparison and
the trap of hey look, I can helpyou make X, y, z amount of
(44:40):
money in 30 days.
I can do these things because itworked for me and it's that
cookie cutter system thatdoesn't work and that's why I I
talk about that in my, mycoaching and mentoring program
is this ain't a cookie cuttersystem.
I'm not going to give yousomething that worked for me
because, guess what, it's notgoing to work for you.
It could, it might, but we haveto try it on first.
(45:02):
We have to make sure it fitsfor you, cause that's what I
think is like I talked aboutthat circle, you know circle
sticking to the pay, whatever we.
We see all these things onInstagram and Facebook and it's
the highlight reels and it's allthese things.
And so if it doesn't happen foryou in the timeline that
happened for that person, yougive up on yourself.
And so for me, I've thoughtabout that.
(45:23):
Well, if they're doing it andit took them 30 days, but it's
taking me three years it's notworth it.
I'm going to give up on myself.
But, like I mentioned, if Ididn't give up on that life I
had created, I had built twobusinesses, I had built a family
, I had built a lot and I nevergave up on them, why would I
(45:44):
give up on myself?
And I fear that sometimes thatI have wanted to throw in the
towel because it gets hard, andI think that's why most people
don't want to try is becausethat familiar chaos that's
really hard.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
It's just gotten comfortable seems easier than a
new lease on life yeah, I justheard something the other day
about throwing in the towel andwhere that came from and it and
it came from being in the fightring and they used a towel to to
(46:19):
kind of clean up and get thefighter back on their feet, to
be back in for the next round.
And then it became throw in thetowel.
When they threw it to themiddle, then okay, the fighter's
done.
And it was kind of like that isreally interesting, you can use
the towel but you don't have tothrow it in.
And it just kind of struck meas a kind of a metaphor to life
(46:46):
of like, yeah, yeah, you, youmight have to clean up a mess
and keep going, but, um, but youknow it, it's, there's strength
within that of cleaning so much.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
Yeah, I mean that that right there just was like
oh wow, it could get messy and,yes, you might have to use that
towel, but don't throw it in.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Yeah, yeah, I like that.
Can you tell when you need anadventure, where you need to
just put a stop to whatever ofyour day and just go be
adventurous?
Speaker 3 (47:20):
There for a while, no , there for a while, no, um.
But I feel like now, because Iam in more in alignment with
what I want to be doing, um, Iwas pressuring myself a lot so
for a good three or four months,like I had mentioned, with
mentors and things that weren'taligned with me, um, I, I was, I
was constantly working, youknow, constantly feeling like,
(47:41):
well, it has to change nowbecause I've done this and I've
invested in all things and Iwasn't taking the time and I
think that adventurous side andthat creative side and that
thing I talk about this too.
I ask people this when I mentorthem all the time, I'm like when
was the last time you didsomething like that Adventurous
or creative or exciting thatbrings you that passion right,
that, that, that that excitement.
(48:02):
And most oftentimes people arelike you know, and have to think
about it for a while, and thenthey say it and I said, okay,
well, when was the last time youdid it?
So for me, I'm starting torealize that there's days where
I'm like you know what I'm goingto go for, that afternoon walk,
and people are like, why wouldyou do that?
That doesn't sound fun.
Well, for me, it gets me intothe flow, it gets me into.
It actually gets me out of hereand into here.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
So you got to find those things that do that.
So I think, yes, for a longtime I wasn't listening to that.
I just needed to take a break.
I needed to to pause andreflect.
Speaker 2 (48:41):
Yeah, and I wasn't doing that.
So if you need to take a,longer break.
Speaker 3 (48:43):
What do you like to do?
I love to travel.
My fiance and I really do liketo just take little short
weekends up with our dog and dowhatever we need to.
But you know, I think a lot oftimes a lot of people are
fearful of the pause or fearfulof the stop for a second, and I
was for a really long time.
I heard that from a mentor goshback, even when I was in that
(49:03):
really terrible spot of my lifeand it was you have to slow down
, to speed up, and I was likemakes no sense.
But you know, taking a longerpause sometimes I just got back
from a trip in Mexico and Iliterally had no.
I mean, I had my phone and Ichecked things and I was looking
at things, but I didn't haveany like well, what's going to
happen today?
And it feels good to come back,and I do.
(49:25):
I felt fearful coming back,like how do I get back into
reality?
And I do that sometimes whereI'm like, yeah, well, I got off
the horse and it's hard, youknow, and so I think that's what
people think is like I can'tstop, I'm in this momentum.
But sometimes that momentum isthe thing to say this is where
you need to be, but still liveyour life as well.
Speaker 2 (49:47):
Yeah, wow.
So are you a heart listener ora head listener?
Speaker 3 (50:04):
you must listen to your intuition a lot and I'm
like, well, yes, I do, and so Ithink a lot of times I listen to
okay.
So let me rephrase this I loveto listen to my inner soul, my
heart center, my intuition, Ifeel like sits a little bit more
in kind of in my gut, but Ilove to listen to that.
And I was saying this yesterdayif I don't listen, I am
(50:24):
rewarded with something I don'twant.
If I listen to my head, I'mredirected pretty quickly and
it's like hey, remember what,what, what, what was here and
what was here?
And that's when I've made somepretty poor decisions in my life
and they've had the biggestconsequences.
As when I've made some prettypoor decisions in my life and
(50:45):
they've had the biggestconsequences.
As when I thought with my headand not with my heart or that
inner knowing of is this a gooddecision or is this a decision
that you're making that doesn'tfeel good for you.
Speaker 2 (50:54):
Yeah Well, what would you tell younger Maggie that's
coming, or to prepare for, ordon't do?
Speaker 3 (51:06):
or to prepare for or don't do so.
There's this whole thing onInstagram right now.
That's like this trend of youtook your younger self to coffee
and what did you tell her?
And I think for me, I keepthinking about like what would I
say?
And I'm like, well, first offit wouldn't be coffee, but I
think for me it would be.
It's okay to show up who youwere then, as in, I've always
(51:35):
had a unique trait.
I've always been different.
I've always stood out from thecrowd.
I have never been in thatclique, I have never had that,
and I've always thought ofmyself as different and it
doesn't work, but it actuallytruly is my superpower.
My uniqueness is my superpower,and I am now saying to her like
(51:57):
I love you for who you werethen and I am you now.
I want to show up for you howyou were when you were a kid.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
Huh, I like that.
I like that because you're, youknow.
So many people say just surviveit, you're going to be fine.
That's what I would tell myyounger self and it's like, but
that because you just embraced,you're encouraging.
Don't just survive it, embraceit.
(52:28):
So that's.
I like that, maggie.
We've talked about a whole lotof different things, gone over
many, many subjects.
Is there something that wehaven't touched on, that you
want to make sure we do?
Speaker 3 (52:45):
touched on that you want to make sure we do.
Um, no, I think we've, we've,we've definitely hit a lot of uh
, the the pain and pleasurepoints for me is is how I like
to kind of share who I am andwhat I've gone through.
Um, I think that you know, Ithink just my one thing that
always stands out so much in mylife is is that, like I just
said, is, if you think you'reweird, you think you're
(53:06):
different, you think you're this, embrace that, and that could
be a whole new episode.
But you know, just embraceyourself, embrace who you are.
I mean, we do grow and change,but technically we actually
enhance who we were brought intothis world.
Speaker 4 (53:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (53:25):
Before everybody else decided to say you're weird or
you're this or you're different,or society told you you should
be this way or that way.
Just embrace it, like you justsaid Fully embrace what life is
doing for you.
It's for you, not to you.
I caught that four verses too.
Speaker 2 (53:47):
I like that.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
And I say that all the time and it's funny how it
has become a saying, you know,but that's because life is
happening for you, not to you,and I was told that by a mentor.
It was my first very evermentor and he's a huge celebrity
now at this point and I lovejust listening to the fact that,
like that has stuck with meabout eight years ago that it
(54:09):
was like it happens for you andwhen you can truly decide to
rewire your thought around, it'shappening to me, because to me
is victim, to me is I'm going tosit and suffer, I'm going to be
the one that pouts and I'mgoing to be the one that pouts
and I'm going to be the one thatstomps and says life's unfair.
But when you can say life ishappening for you, you can find
(54:30):
the beauty in the chaos and youcan say I went through this or
this happened to me because Ican now be something else
because I can now be somethingelse.
Speaker 2 (54:46):
That's fabulous.
Speaker 3 (54:49):
How do people follow you, get in touch with you?
Yeah, so my biggest platform orthe place that I am most active
on is Instagram.
Powerwithinherinc andpowerwithinhercom is my website,
and those are the two bestplaces to find out who I am,
what I'm doing, all the eventsthat I'll be hosting and all
different kinds of stuff that'scoming.
(55:10):
It's just, it's been such apleasure to talk with you.
It's been such a goodconversation, but, yes, I love
people connecting with me andsharing their vulnerability and
their takeaways from anythingand everything, and perspective
is such a cool thing for me.
What do you feel?
How do you feel?
Because it's different than howI do.
Speaker 2 (55:29):
Oh, I love that.
And you are able to coach.
You're able to do some of thisvirtually, so people can connect
no matter where they are.
Speaker 3 (55:38):
Yep, absolutely I love to work.
I do love in person because Ijust love as a hairstylist.
So that physical I always sayphysical touch that seems a
little out of context, but, youknow, just being able to feel
and I have an event this weekendand just that, that, that
energy of in person.
But yes, I love virtual becauseit connects me with.
(55:59):
I have, you know, people fromover the world that I work with
and just seeing the difference,the difference in cultures, but
the similarities in life.
Oh isn't that crazy.
Speaker 2 (56:13):
It is.
It is.
It makes the world smaller,more understandable.
Put a face on it and it changesperspective Absolutely Well,
that's great.
I have one more question.
Yes, and you may have alreadyalluded to this a little bit, If
you had a superpower for 24hours, you can use it personally
(56:34):
or professionally whatsuperpower would you choose?
And then, how would you use itand why would that be your
choice?
How would you use it and why?
Speaker 3 (56:43):
would that be your choice?
So I think I have a superpowerof reading people, and so I
think it would be readingsomeone from the inside out, not
from the outside in, becauseoutside in is perspective,
inside out is understanding.
(57:04):
I think.
So how would I use that?
It would be able to be able tomake bigger impact, because when
you look at somebody from theoutside, that's your perspective
, that's your story and that'syour lens.
But if you can actually goinside and work from the inside
and really truly dig into thelayers and the deepness, that's
(57:26):
the person you're looking for.
Speaker 2 (57:29):
Oh, wow, I love that.
That's great, maggie.
Thank you, this has been afabulous conversation.
Speaker 3 (57:35):
Yes, thank you Very much enjoyed.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
It Got my pockets full of dreams and they're
busting at the seams, going boom, boom, boom to my own song.
Speaker 4 (57:59):
Gotta stomp to my own drum, stomp to my own song
Stomp.
Speaker 2 (58:11):
Hey, find stacked keys podcast on spotify,
soundcloud and itunes oranywhere you get your favorite
podcast.
Listen you'll laugh out loudyou, you'll cry a little, you'll
find yourself encouraged.
Join us for casual conversationthat leads itself, based on
where we take it, from family tophilosophy, to work, to meal
(58:32):
prep, to beautifully survivinglife.
And hey, if I could ask a bigfavor of you, go to iTunes and
give us a five rating.
The more people who rate us,the more we get this podcast out
there.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
Speaker 4 (58:52):
Hey, gonna put on my boots and move.
Got a stomp to my own drum,stomp to my own zone, stomp hey,
ooh ooh, gonna sing it out loudand say it real proud.
Speaker 1 (59:15):
Nobody's gonna step on my cloud Cause I stomp, stomp
to the beat of my big drum.
I got a big drum.
Whatever you do, it ain'tnothing on me, because I'm doing
my thing and I got the key toall my wants and all my dreams.
Speaker 4 (59:31):
Yeah, Because I stomp to my own drum, stomp to my own
song, stomp.
Hey, gonna, put on my boots andmove.
Song to my own drum song, to mybig drum song.
(59:51):
Yeah, got my pockets full ofdreams.
Yeah, they've been passing outthe same singing.
Wow, wow.
I'm walking all alone down my yellow brick road and I
stomp to the beat of my owndrum.
I got my pockets full of dreamsand they're busting at the
seams, going boom, boom boom.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Welcome to Stacked Keys Podcast.
I'm your host, amy Stackhouse.
This is a podcast to featurewomen who are impressive in the
work world or in raising afamily, or who have hobbies that
make us all feel encouraged.
Want to hear what makes thesewomen passionate to get up in
the morning, or what maybe theywish they'd known a little bit
(00:42):
earlier in their lives.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
Grab your keys and stomp to your own drum.
Whatever you do, it ain'tnothing on me, because I'm doing
my thing and I hold the key toall my wants and all my dreams
Like an old song everything willbe all right when I let myself
(01:20):
go Well.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Today I am excited to introduce a guest, maggie Bio.
Welcome, maggie.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Thank you.
Thank you so much.
I'm so excited to be here.
Speaker 2 (01:31):
Oh thrilled to have you, and right out of the gate.
Let's start off with Maggie.
How do people know you, bothpersonally and professionally?
Speaker 3 (01:40):
That's a great question.
I love that.
So, so I have, uh, a lot ofenthusiasm.
I have a very brightpersonality, and so I was a
hairstylist for 19 years, um,and also owned a fitness studio
for 10 years, and I just hadthis bright light about me that,
um, once I was in front ofpeople, my magnetic energy came
(02:02):
out.
Um, and then also you know,that's kind of personally I'm
quirky, fun, exciting, love tobe playful and fun.
And then professionally, Iactually have now taken off the
hairstylist cape and also thefitness journey, and I have
stepped into being a podcaster,speaker and mentor through life
(02:23):
experiences that have basicallygiven me a degree of hard knocks
and I like to teach, as thementor that I am is all about
experience and that you canbecome your own self-awareness
tool to be able to change yourlife and rewrite your story.
Speaker 2 (02:42):
Oh wow, All right.
So teaching that you must havehad some mentors along your way
to where you could see someimportance and validity to that.
What kind of mentors did you?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
have.
So it's it's funny that youasked that when I first was out
of my very rough, abusive, toxicrelationship, I really didn't
have any mentors and I was doinga lot of it on my own.
I really feel like a lot oftimes healing comes from within.
Hence, all of the umbrellasthat I kind of teach from is the
(03:15):
power is within us.
And, yes, we need mentors andcoaches and guiders, but a lot
of times it comes from your ownself-awareness.
And so when I kind of started tosolidify the decision of
walking away from the careerthat I had to become this
speaker, you know mentor andpodcaster I started looking into
(03:36):
hiring people and you knowcoaches and mentors I have to
speak this out because I havealso had this happen to me where
you have to speak this outbecause I have also had this
happen to me where you have toalign 100% with their product,
their knowledge, their basis,all of the things, because you
can quickly get into the wrongsituations.
(03:57):
Um and I think that becomesanother thing of self-awareness
Um, I was in a relationship withmy business partner or business
coach, I should say and Iquickly realized I think I might
be in that toxic relationshipthat I got myself out of so with
coaches and mentors, it's veryimportant to pick the ones that
(04:17):
have the most alignment withyour values, your, you know,
your, your desires and yourwants.
Cause it can.
It can really be the thedeciding factor whether you keep
going after the life that youtruly want or it kind of holds
you back.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Wow.
So do you have a method thatyou would suggest, or that
you've kind of figured out, tobe able to find that alignment,
because you know you could?
You could waste six monthsfiguring out.
Hey, we don't really jive onwhat we're saying here.
So how have you come up with amethod?
Speaker 3 (04:56):
You know.
So I have lots of differentmethods in my world around the
awareness factor and really,truly, we all have that inner
voice, that inner guidance, andI think that a lot of times I'm
actually crafting some of thisinto my keynote is we have the
(05:16):
answers pretty much right infront of our face, but most
oftentimes we kind of look tothe left or look to the right,
thinking maybe it's, maybe it'sokay, but really I think it
comes from what does your bodyfeel like, what does your
mindset feel like, what doesyour attitude feel like?
And if, if they don't feel good,if they don't feel aligned and
(05:38):
you kind of feel like a wobblyold mess and you're kind of I I
was doing this myself, beatingmy head up against a wall,
sometimes trying to figure outlike what is what's, why can't I
figure out this, why can't Ifigure it out?
It's probably not an alignment.
So I like to talk about justfeelings.
How are you talking to yourselfabout it?
(05:59):
Is it making you feel crazy?
Is it making you questionyourself?
And then you get to have thatas your feedback.
And I also like to say that noinvestment or no mentor is a
good, bad, right or wrongexperience.
It's just the feedback that youneed in that very moment of
your life.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Oh wow, you know you mentioned self-talk there.
So in talking to yourself areyou a self-talker.
Speaker 3 (06:27):
Yes, I am getting much better about positive
self-talk instead of negativeself-talk or that
self-sabotaging talk, and it isa practice.
It's a daily practice and Ithink a lot of people think that
with positive self-talk, it'sjust about.
You know, I can do it once in awhile and we really need to
(06:50):
start to spot them, our thoughts, as soon as we start to have
them, and if we think I'm sayingsomething that's more on the
negative side, you just have tosay to yourself you know not
right now and and replace itwith a new, new thought and I do
that a lot.
I think sometimes I'm like, ah,you know, start to kind of beat
(07:10):
myself up inside.
But really that self compassionand self talk is so, so, so
important, especially whenyou're trying to align with the
next best version of yourself ona daily basis, with the next
best version of yourself on adaily basis.
Speaker 2 (07:25):
Yeah Well, what you've done is a little bit
scary.
I mean, you had two careersthat were pretty solid, that
people are always into and theyunderstand.
You know, it's like I am ahairdresser.
I work with hair Okay, I have avisual picture of what that is.
I know what you do.
I work in fitness Okay, whatkind?
(07:45):
All, right, now I have a visualpicture of that.
You jumped off into somethingthat people are like huh, so how
does that feel?
Speaker 3 (08:04):
How do you wrap your head around that?
And not oh what, what did I do?
Yeah, um, I think it comes from.
I talk a lot about three wordscourage, trust and strength, but
the I think courage on this oneis my answer.
Um, courage to be able to trustyourself um enough and know
that anything in life is anopportunity to make a decision
(08:29):
that could change your lifeforever.
And I was kind of living in theyou know, when we're going in
through what do you want to beas an adult and what do you want
?
It was like, well, I don'treally know.
I don't want to go to college,so I picked hairstyling.
I quickly just fell into it.
You know, I don't think I everreally truly had this ultimate
(08:50):
passion for it, and then withfitness, I have a huge passion
for it.
So it still is very court, likekind of combined into a lot of
the things that I do withcoaching and mentoring.
But that was stripped away fromme when I did make the
courageous decision to leavebehind the life that I thought I
had created.
(09:10):
But I just knew that I had totrust myself enough to
understand what I had beenallowing for a decade of my life
was actually molding me intothis person, and I could either
surrender and let go of the pastand forgive the past that I had
(09:33):
gone through, or I could holdonto it and have it keep me
hostage.
And that's what it was doingfor 10 years, was I was held
hostage of someone else's dream,someone else's life, someone
else's passion?
Yes, did I have the passionsfor it, but was it mine and was
it the true, aligned direction Iwas supposed to take?
(09:54):
No, and that again goes to thehow do you feel?
Were you waking up every day,miserable, trying to figure out
why the heck you felt so bad andtrying to always question
yourself?
That's when you know you're.
You're just not meant to be inthat place.
And that's one of the things Italk about is power shifting,
and you have to be in your ownpower to say you know what I
(10:15):
don't like this and I need tomake the shifts harder.
Hard or not, worth it or not,no one knows, but you have to
trust yourself to try it yeah,wow.
Speaker 2 (10:28):
Well, you're young and so, but you've got all this
life experience.
Do you ever find yourself andlook in the mirror and go, oh,
what am I doing?
And feel that I guess it'scalled imposter syndrome of like
maybe I shouldn't be the onetelling you, you know, coaching
(10:48):
along.
Do you ever have those feelings?
Speaker 3 (10:52):
Oh gosh, yes, and I think that's a natural, normal
person.
You know, we think we don'thave a story to tell.
We think we don't have anexperience that is bigger or
cooler than the other person,have an experience that is
bigger or cooler than the otherperson.
We tend to also compare ourjourney at our day one, or our
even year one, to someone'sjourney of 10 years into what
(11:16):
they're doing, and so that, Ithink, is a big part of the
picture.
I am very guilty of doing thatwhere it's like well, how do
they have all these clients, howdo they have this and why are
they doing it this way at all?
I want that, I want that, but Ialso like to think of that as
that's your inspiration.
If those are the things thatare calling to you, it means
they're on your heart and thatthey're meant for you as well.
(11:38):
So it's not about comparingyourself.
It's about how do I take theaction.
Comparing yourself it's abouthow do I take the action.
How do I get myself into thatposition?
Because I think a lot of times,comparison is just jealousy,
because you want to be there,you know, you're like, ah, I
want to do that.
And so, instead of it beingcomparing and having the
(12:00):
jealousy feeling, think of it aslike this is what is in your
forefront.
That's almost your higher selfreaching to you to say this is
what you want.
And that's almost your higherself reaching to you to say this
is what you want.
And I'm here to show you thatit's possible for you to.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
So what would you say ?
The difference between wishingand realizing your dreams might
be.
Speaker 3 (12:20):
Ooh, um, this might have to kind of drop in for me
for a second.
Um, I think a wish is a desireand I say this over and over and
I'll say it till I'm blue inthe face.
What you desire, you deservefor something to happen.
(12:45):
I think you sit with that andyou think about it.
You have to do the wholealignment check again.
You know how does it make youfeel.
If it's something that lightsyou up and you feel that it's a
desire for you to have it,whether it's be coaching,
mentoring, owning your ownbusiness, stepping into a
completely different world, likeI did, you have to decide.
You have to say to yourself isthis something that I'm wishing
(13:06):
for, or is it something that Ireally, truly want to do?
And here to tell you failureand setbacks and all the things
are going to happen, but it'skind of facing that and doing it
anyways, and then trulyreminding yourself that if it
doesn't feel aligned and itdoesn't feel good, that is the
decision you can make.
(13:27):
Again to say, what else can Itry?
And I think that's where mostpeople get stuck is they think I
have this dream or I have thiswish, but how do I get there and
no one knows.
We're all figuring it out.
No one's different than anybodythe people who are where you
(13:51):
want to be.
The difference is is they justtook the steps and they got
bumped backwards or sideways andthey continued to just say that
it wasn't just a desire or awish.
It was the dream that they weresupposed to fulfill for
themselves.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
And with that takes a lot of work.
From what I'm hearing, Twosteps forward, one step back,
two steps forward, three stepssideways.
I mean that just it just soundslike it's kind of a give and
take pull that you embrace.
Speaker 3 (14:18):
Absolutely, and I always say, like life is a dance
, and also, too, it takesimperfect bravery we don't have.
There's no perfect time,there's no perfect setting,
there's no perfect experience,there's no perfect mapped out
road.
Most of us want that, like,here's the yellow brick road
(14:41):
that we get to follow and wejust know that on the other side
of that is that pot of gold orwhatever we're looking for, and
it's just not that way.
And I think that that's anotherthing that scares people off of
following their heart and theirpassions, because it's not a
linear path, it is bumpy and itdoes require, like you said,
give and take, push and pull,dust yourself off and continue
(15:04):
to pull yourself up, because alot of times I always say this
too we fear the unknown, becauseit's uncertain, but we're not
fearful of the chaos that welive every day.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Well, that's interesting.
Speaker 3 (15:25):
Yeah, that's what I say all the time.
It's like we love to stay inthis familiar certain chaos
because we're uncertain of thebeauty that could be right here
on the other side of that.
One courageous step to changeyour life.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Wow.
So what would you say is thebiggest?
Speaker 3 (15:48):
waste of time.
Overthinking andprocrastinating.
I do it all the time too.
Still, I mean it's a waste oftime, it really is.
Overthinking andprocrastinating is just another
form of perfectionism.
I think, or I know that, and,like I just mentioned, perfect
is actually boring.
(16:09):
And if we were all perfectwhich, by the way, nothing in
life is perfect, and that'sactually the beauty in this
world is that we're allimperfect humans doing the best
that we can with the knowledgethat's at our fingertips.
Speaker 2 (16:27):
You mentioned the word failure a little while ago
and it's like failure sometimescan make you pause and not want
to go forward.
How do you feel about failure?
Speaker 3 (16:43):
You know, when I first started the journey called
life failure, to me it didn'tseem like anything.
You know, when you're a kidit's kind of like we failed at a
game or we did and we just keptgoing.
You know, we were like, we wereresilient, I feel, and we tend
to overthink as we get to beadults and we think that failure
is really truly the disaster.
(17:04):
It's the point of it didn'twork, it's never going to work.
But if you think about a lot ofpeople in this world I mean
even like I think somebodyreferenced, you know, the light
bulb.
I think it took him like,however many thousands of tries,
and if he would have given upwe probably wouldn't still have
light bulb.
So we have to think aboutfailure as I used to think, as
(17:24):
failure was.
It's not meant for me, it's toohard, it's not worth it.
And now failure to me is thatredirect I talk about.
Sometimes it's the beauty andthe blessing in the skies that
comes through that failure andit's also feedback.
It's feedback for you to eithersay, man, I learned from this
(17:47):
and I can grow from it, or I canlet this be the thing that just
stops me dead in my tracks.
Speaker 2 (17:55):
Yeah Well, so much of what you've talked about so far
takes a great deal of thoughtand kind of raking through and
getting rid of the negative andreaching for more and so many
different subjects.
What subject or aspect reallymakes your brain just ache?
Speaker 3 (18:23):
So I think in my world, what makes me just like
cringe a lot of times and acheand and and honestly feel for
people is awareness, and that iswhy one of my biggest
modalities and biggest trainingsI ever do with people is one
(18:44):
simple word and it's aware, andit's a way of, it's a technique
to with any experience I'mtalking any experience and any
emotion or any thought or anyfeeling.
You can work through one simpleword and that's awareness, and
I talk it, I just work youthrough it.
The A stands for you know, wecan work through that.
(19:06):
If you want, I can kind of diveinto that a little bit or we
can.
Okay, so think of it this way.
Like I've mentioned three orfour times, everything in life
is feedback, right, we.
Nothing in life really is good,bad, right or wrong.
It's just our own perspectiveand our own experience we all
talk about.
I always like to reference thisbecause it's a very easy
(19:29):
reference.
If you go to a movie and I goto the same movie, you come out
and you're like gosh, that wasthe best movie I've ever seen
and I'm like, wow, I reallydidn't catch it.
I didn't like it.
Perspective, that's awareness,that's your self-awareness
around.
I loved this movie and mine was.
I didn't really care for it.
So good, bad, right, wrong.
(19:49):
There's neutrality in themiddle Right, and so I like to
work through aware.
With this simple word you cando this with anything.
Is you have to be aware, oracknowledge what's in front of
you.
Is it helping you, or is itcreating chaos?
Or is it what?
Is it right?
We have to acknowledge it,because first step of awareness
(20:13):
and change is acknowledgingbehaviors and then willingness.
So we go to the W, we go forwillingness to change.
We have to tell ourselves arewe lying to ourselves and we're
trying to make things work andwe're trying to push the peg
into a round you know, round peginto a square hole, trying to
figure all these things out?
If it's not working and it'sfeeling like that, you have to
(20:36):
have willingness to move throughit.
And then that comes to the nextA, which is alignment, that
feeling that we've talked about.
How does it make you feel?
Are you feeling confident?
Are you feeling excited?
Are you feeling motivated?
Are you feeling driven or areyou beating your head up against
the wall, like I was for a longtime?
And then you have to be able torelease what doesn't serve you.
(21:02):
What is it the thought?
Is it the emotion?
Is it the action?
Cause you got to release itbecause it's going to hold you
hostage if you don't.
And then the E leads us intoexperience.
Go out and experience somethingelse.
It's just like pieces ofclothing.
If you feel like they don't fitanymore, what do you do?
You go buy a new shirt.
(21:23):
So you can do that with anyexperience in your life.
If it doesn't feel right, itdoesn't fit into your life, it
doesn't work anymore.
Try something else on, take anew experience, and you will
never know what opportunityholds the key to changing your
life wow and that's great.
(21:44):
That's my aware technique andthat's just like I said.
You can literally do this withany, anything throughout the day
.
I mean five different timesevery day.
I go.
Let me get aware.
How am I feeling, how it alsocan help you to not be so
reactive.
It can help you to not be soreactive.
It can help you to become morealigned and more slower.
(22:07):
You know, kind of starteddressing.
How does this make me feel?
Because if we're not aware,we're never going to change.
Speaker 2 (22:14):
Right.
So, is it callous?
Is it this?
Is it calculating everythingthat comes through, and does it
make you more, less feelingabout situations or events?
Speaker 3 (22:30):
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to say less feeling, I
think it actually makes you feelmore.
Speaker 2 (22:37):
Permission, I guess.
Speaker 3 (22:38):
Yeah, it gives you permission to understand, like
I've been saying, that good, bad, right, wrong.
What if you went about lifeknowing you can't get it wrong?
You know, if you went aboutyour day, instead of the fear of
the unknown, the fear of thefailure, the fear of the
uncertainty, if you knew eachday what you were doing, you
(23:04):
couldn't get it wrong, you werejust going to get the feedback
that you needed to make theshifts.
What would, how would you liveyour life differently?
And that's how I started living.
My life is living it worriedand fearful of like, well,
what's he going to think if Ileft?
Or what's my business going tothink if I just pick up and
(23:24):
leave?
What are my clients going tothink if I just want to not do
hair anymore?
You can't get it wrong.
You have to just decide.
Speaker 2 (23:34):
Yeah, you know, my mind went to being a parent, a
young parent, and you know whoyou surround yourself with of
like, whether you're using cloth, diapers or paper, or whether
you're nursing or using formula,or whether you're giving
vegetables or you're givingfruits or you're letting them
(23:57):
play here or play there, and youcan every situation go well,
there's one right way, and whenyou find out, no, there's a
million right ways, and so it'skind of that same thing.
You kind of embrace the freedomof making a choice because you
(24:18):
know you use formula or younurse, if you don't starve them,
they're fine, and somehowthey'll grow up to be great
adults, and so it just it's theweight that we put on things
sometimes can be so unbearable.
So do you think our dailyactions kind of make us who we
(24:39):
are?
Speaker 3 (24:41):
100%, 100% Because you know, I'll even think about
my daily actions.
Five years ago, my dailyactions were I rolled out of bed
.
I said, oh God, here we goagain, but I still pushed my.
You know, I still did my dailyactions.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (24:59):
But I was.
It was almost like walking thatyellow brick road we talked
about, but it was like this road.
That was just like normal,robotic.
It was, oh, I have to do this,this is the way my life is
supposed to be.
This is what I chose.
These are the things I did.
So I just lived that way.
Oh, I have to be cheated on, Ihave to be manipulated.
I have to have that because Iwant this.
(25:21):
So my actions led me to allowthe behaviors because I thought
that was as good as my life got.
And that's what most peoplethink is.
I chose this.
Whether you're married, you'renot, you're engaged, you're this
.
Whatever it is, life changes,people change, opportunities
(25:41):
change, experiences changes.
If it doesn't feel good anymore, that's when you have to use
the aware technique walkyourself through it.
What am I allowing that is notserving me, that is holding me
hostage of living a happier,more fulfilling life.
And I like to always ask thatquestion when you think about
that person, like we kind ofreferenced earlier, if that
(26:04):
person's living that happier,more fulfilling life that you
want, and you look to the rightand you look to the left and you
look forward and you think whois deserving of living that
happier, more fulfilling life,and the first person that comes
to your mind if it isn'tyourself, that's the feedback
you need.
Yeah, wow, you know.
(26:25):
I mean plain and simple.
The first person that shouldcome to that forefront of your
brain is yourself, because we'realways constantly worried about
what everybody else is thinking.
What's the opinion of thisperson, how's this person going
to act?
How's it?
Well, how about we startthinking about ourself first?
And that's a whole debacle wecould get into about.
That's selfish.
How is that selfish If I wantto live a life that is happier
(26:51):
and more fulfilling.
And guess what, if I'm livingthat life, you're going to be
more fulfilled too, because I'mgoing to treat you better.
Speaker 2 (26:59):
Yeah, it has a way of coming back.
Speaker 3 (27:02):
Yeah, it has a way of coming back.
Yeah, and also, it could alsohelp that person think, if she's
doing it and the world isn'tcolliding, maybe I could do it
too.
Yeah, so complete this sentencefor me we were put on this earth
to live a happier, morefulfilling life.
(27:22):
I would think that, right there, that's just a mic drop for me.
Like we, we were put on thisplanet to live a happy, healthy,
fulfilling life and, honestly,I think it's through passion and
purpose, and each of us has hada dream that is either dropped
into us I like to say wisdomshowers, I like to say when
(27:46):
you're sleeping the thingsaround you, the opportunities,
the synchronicities.
I believe that there is a paththat we are meant to be taking
and the redirects are there toput you on your most aligned
path, but it also takes theawareness and the willingness to
be able to try that out.
Speaker 2 (28:06):
Yeah, you said passion and purpose, meaning
that there's two, that those aretwo, those can be two different
things.
So what do you, how do you feelabout passion and then how do
you feel about purpose?
Kind of define those for me andthen how do you feel about
purpose, kind of define thosefor me?
Speaker 3 (28:24):
Yeah, so for me, I think, passion comes from
everything in between.
Your purpose Do you?
Are you passionate about yourlife?
Are you passionate about yourpartner?
Are you passionate about thefuture that you're going for?
And your purpose is yourcalling.
(28:49):
So for me, my purpose is toimpact women.
Right now, specifically, I wouldlove to do a collective, but
right now, my purpose in life isthat I went through what I did
to be able to stand in front ofwomen, mentoring and podcasting
and speaking about my experienceand my life.
That's my purpose, and I thinka lot of times people are like
(29:10):
well, I don't know what mypurpose is.
Well, you went throughsomething in your life that you
are one step ahead of the personthat you could mentor and maybe
that's not because noteverybody wants to be a coach or
a mentor, but there's somethingin your life that brought you
to where you are today and whoyou want to be a coach or a
mentor.
But there's something in yourlife that brought you to where
you are today and who you wantto be.
And a purpose is what has beenput on your heart or in your
(29:33):
forefront, and passion comesfrom.
How does it make you feel?
How does your life look?
Is it?
Are you passionate about wakingup?
And that leads me to my secondtechnique is I talk about?
If you're not aware, you arenot alive.
If you are not alive, you arenot in your own power.
(29:55):
You are letting other peopledictate how your life is going
to look.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Wow.
So you seem really strong andreally focused and I think
there's been a lot of work toget you there.
But growing up, did your familylife, did your mom, kind of
pour into you and begin tocreate this strong, young, young
lady?
Speaker 3 (30:24):
I have always loved my mom dearly and both, both of
my parents were always there forus as kids and I don't ever say
anything, um, differently and Ithink that, yes, I saw the
strength in my mother, but Ialso saw a lot of weakness in my
mom and I think that, um,there's a lot of behaviors that
(30:47):
I might have held on to becauseof what I saw through my own
relationship with my parents andtheir relationship.
And I think that you allowbehaviors because you're like
well I, but I kind of saw thatmodeled and I think for me, the
strength actually truly camefrom, like I mentioned in the
very, very beginning, it was onthe inside of me.
(31:08):
My strength was stripped awayfrom a lot of things in my
childhood and also, too, throughlife experience.
But it's up to you to decide ifyou want to find that again,
because we're all born, becausewe're all born pretty confident,
we're all born prettycourageous.
You know we like to take actionand try to walk and fall and
(31:30):
stumble and walk again, and wetry to talk, and we don't know
how to talk, but we sure dostart to learn how to.
So it's all about where was itstripped away and how can you
then reclaim it, and that's alot about.
What I talk about, too, isrelease, reclaim and rewrite.
If you don't like the narrative, change it.
Speaker 2 (31:52):
Well and that takes a lot, a lot of willingness to be
vulnerable with yourself.
So do you kind of prepare to bevulnerable?
And I mean you've done a lot ofthe work, but is it still
ongoing?
Speaker 3 (32:11):
Oh gosh and I think that's one of the biggest
compliments that I get almostdaily is your vulnerability, as
in my, vulnerability is whatmakes people I don't want to say
crumble in a bad way, butcrumble to be able to say you
know what?
I want to start breaking thesebricks down as well.
(32:31):
I want to start moving forward,because if you can be
vulnerable I mean I'm vulnerableevery day and I think that's a
huge part of being in the growthperiod, and growth is not the
destination, it's the journeythat we take each day to step
into that person.
Do I have good days?
Absolutely.
Do I have really good days?
(32:52):
Absolutely.
Do I have really bad days?
You betcha, I do, Becausethat's normal.
That's the imperfect bravery,that's the imperfect person that
you have to be to understandlife.
You know, life is just.
It's just mess.
It's messy and it's meant to bechaotic, but it's also meant to
(33:14):
be the chaoticness or thechaotic crazy that we think is
normal, to show you that there'sactually a way to live in more
peace and harmony and alignmentwith your true, authentic self.
Speaker 2 (33:28):
Yeah, wow.
So rich can mean so manydifferent things to us.
It can be monetary, it can begetting your career where you
want it to be.
It can be anything.
In what way do you feel rich?
Speaker 3 (33:44):
You know it's interesting.
I was listening to somethingyesterday and it talked about
like, what does money mean toyou, like, what is it going to
feel?
Because you have to feel thatfeeling.
And for me, like mine, isimpact.
And so when I think about, oh,how can I like have this rich
feeling, it's for me, it's thatimpact, it's that feeling of the
(34:05):
vulnerability, the shares andletting people understand that
everybody in life has a story.
We all have a unique way thatwe've walked through life.
But being able to be vulnerableand open up and share about it
and know that you're not aloneis the key to that richness, I
(34:26):
think.
And richness in life doesn'tjust have to be, like you said,
monetary.
The monetary almost kind offlows in when you're in line.
You're in line with you know,you're feeling like you're
floating right.
Things feel good.
It's not effortless, but it'saligned and it feels flowy.
(34:52):
It doesn't feel like Imentioned the heading beating up
against a wall or feeling as ifyou're stumbling over your own
two feet.
It's part of the process andfor richness, I think that
that's such a label for me thatit's about impact and
fulfillment of my own self andbeing able to know that I am out
there each day taking the stepsto leave.
(35:17):
That impact comes with thesimple text messages, the
comments being on podcasts likethese.
Knowing that someone in youraudience or someone in my own
audience feels lighter from whatI said is the richness.
Speaker 2 (35:35):
Yeah, oh, wow.
Well, you know, being anentrepreneur can be scary,
lonely, frustrating at times, aswell as fulfilling, fabulous
and freeing.
So have you put in place somesystems to kind of protect
yourself, to where you don't godown a dark hole?
Speaker 3 (35:59):
I think I'm working on that right now.
I think, when it comes toentrepreneurship and you know,
being solopreneur really anddoing all the things you do, you
have to protect your energy andyour space.
I mean because half the timeyou know I'm this person, that
person and this person, and eachday I'm like, oh, how do you
juggle it all?
And so I think for me, withthat question, it's like what do
(36:22):
you not feel is your zone ofgenius and I've been told that
from a mentor when I very firststarted this journey was stop
trying to do the things thatdon't give you fulfillment and
maybe you don't have the moneyto do it right away.
And that's one of my things isI'm working through being able
(36:43):
to say, okay, how can Isystemize?
Because I think once yousystemize, things also can start
running in alignment and thingsjust start to happen.
And so for me it's the systemis being kind of placed right
now is how can I be the onethat's out there in my zone of
genius doing the podcasting andspeaking on stages and hosting
(37:06):
retreats and workshops, but alsostill have that backend where
it's like that is not my zone ofgenius?
Computers and things like thatI didn't do it for two decades
of my life.
I'm almost 40.
And now I'm like how do youcreate this?
How do you do it?
And so those are the thingsthat you can eliminate from the
(37:27):
need to have to do until you'rereally ready to do it and focus
on what brings you fulfillmentand passion.
Speaker 2 (37:36):
It's interesting because when I first started my
advertising business, you knowwe focused on small and medium
businesses, because if they werehaving to focus on meeting
everybody that and at that timeeverybody who came in to sell a
billboard or you know some kindof form of media they would
spend a whole day meeting people.
(37:58):
Well then they couldn't dotheir job, their their real work
.
So it's finding that part thattakes up too much of your day.
You know that that can bepassed off to somebody else.
What are you most proud of?
Speaker 3 (38:16):
I think I actually just said this to myself, maybe
even yesterday.
I am proud of not giving up.
Yeah, and I'm talking throughlife.
I mean, like I mentioned evenjust a minute ago, we all have a
story and we all haveexperiences.
Being almost 40, I've had a lotand, like I said, I have a
master's degree in the school ofhard knocks, and so for me,
(38:40):
it's the most proud I have everbeen right now in my life is
that I went through that and Ihave had some bumps along the
road of still standing in mytrue passion and purpose, but
I'm not willing to give up.
I'm not willing to give up.
I didn't give up on a 10 yearlong, decade, toxic, abusive
relationship, so why would Igive up on my dreams?
(39:01):
Why would I give up when itgets tough?
I wasn't willing to let go ofthat toxic certainty.
So why would I give up on thething that means the most to me?
So I'm proud of myself, foreven though I was beating myself
up and beating my head againsta horse or a dead wall or
whatever a dead horse all thethings literally that's how my
(39:26):
brain felt for a while is notgiving up and trusting that in
time and the process, it willall fall together.
Speaker 2 (39:37):
Yeah, trusting time and process, that takes a lot.
That tenacity takes a lot.
So would you say that'sprobably the scariest thing
you've done is not give up onyourself.
Speaker 3 (39:47):
Absolutely.
I think it's been the scariest,the hardest, the most rewarding
all of it in the same breath,because it's your own
perspective each day.
Sometimes, when I don't give up, I'm like why am I not giving
up?
It's hard, but then it's theperspective of who can I impact
and who can I change, or whoselife can I change.
And if the answer continues tofeel like I'm not doing it or it
(40:09):
can't happen, that's thefeedback I need to then be aware
of.
But each morning I still thinkI have a story and I have a
mission and I have a vision ofwho I can and what I want to do
to this world to impact people,to be able to stand in that
truth and to be able to create alife that they have never
thought possible, because I didit Five years ago.
If I could say what my lifelooked like then to what it does
(40:31):
now, people would, you know, dothe huge bug-eyed and the jaw
drop, because it's night and daydifference.
Speaker 2 (40:43):
Wow.
So how do you decide whatdirection you're going to go for
your day to have this impact?
How do you do you?
Do you have a a two year, threeyear, five year, 10 year
business plan, or you?
Speaker 3 (41:03):
know how do you figure out your direction?
It goes back to the awarenessand the willingness is what am I
willing to do today that willimpact me for tomorrow and
that's for me right now.
I'm in my connection.
My word of the year isconnection connection, and it's
(41:27):
absolutely insane.
When you live through intentionand you live through what
you're wanting, things juststart to happen.
I mean the people I'veconnected with, the
opportunities I've already hadin my lap and what we're just
now through, two monthsbasically of the year.
You know, and and for me I'venever been much of like a goal
setter, like this is what I'mgoing to do today to get the
goal tomorrow, because a lot oftimes we don't really know, and
I think that that can hinder usa little bit too, because if it
(41:49):
doesn't happen in the timelinethat we thought it would, that's
failure instantly.
Well, if I failed, I didn't getit done in 30 days, well, what
if it takes 60 days?
And so for me, my goals aren'tnecessarily projected.
To say like I'm going to stopon my dreams in three years if
I'm not at a hundred milliondollars, let's just put it
(42:10):
prospectively.
Mine is is what am I willing todo each day to feel like that
still lights me up inside,because when you're doing
something that doesn't reallyfulfill you, why would you're
doing something that doesn'treally fulfill you?
Why would you keep doing it?
I mean, I was living for 10years of something that wasn't
(42:31):
fulfilling me, but I kept doingit because I thought that was
the, that.
It was the choice I made.
I was raising children.
They're not mine, but I was.
You know, I had so many levelsand layers to this molded story
that I thought was my realityand I think that's what a lot of
people do too is as well.
I'll just stay stuck for itCause I have kids, or I'll just
(42:54):
do these things because of this,or I should I heard that the
other day.
Stop shitting on yourself.
Speaker 4 (43:03):
You know it's it's.
Speaker 3 (43:04):
it's really cute because it's like you know we
should on ourselves all the time.
I should be here.
I should have done this.
I should have this by now, whythat's that blinded story that
you've been telling yourself.
Speaker 2 (43:18):
Yeah, yeah, and I guess that's where you know.
You hear people talking aboutthe entitlement.
Should is an entitled word andmaybe that's where there's the
difference.
That's putting, you know,muscle and effort in place of
(43:40):
the word should and patience andtenacity, you know, followed,
you know, with the work of it,perhaps.
What do you fear the most?
Speaker 3 (43:56):
Um, I think it might actually have already been kind
of answered.
I think fear for me is givingup.
Yeah, I fear giving up onmyself.
I fear that because it has beenhard and I think that a lot of
people in this world, like youjust said, kind of entitled, but
it's almost like this sense offacades and fakeness through
(44:19):
Instagram, tiktok, facebook landthat I think a lot of people
think well, because that persondid it and it was 30 days, I can
do that and if I don't, it's afailure and I'm going to give up
on myself and trust me, I'vefallen into the comparison and
the trap of hey look, I can helpyou make X, y, z amount of
(44:40):
money in 30 days.
I can do these things because itworked for me and it's that
cookie cutter system thatdoesn't work and that's why I I
talk about that in my, mycoaching and mentoring program
is this ain't a cookie cuttersystem.
I'm not going to give yousomething that worked for me
because, guess what, it's notgoing to work for you.
It could, it might, but we haveto try it on first.
(45:02):
We have to make sure it fitsfor you, cause that's what I
think is like I talked aboutthat circle, you know circle
sticking to the pay, whatever we.
We see all these things onInstagram and Facebook and it's
the highlight reels and it's allthese things.
And so if it doesn't happen foryou in the timeline that
happened for that person, yougive up on yourself.
And so for me, I've thoughtabout that.
(45:23):
Well, if they're doing it andit took them 30 days, but it's
taking me three years it's notworth it.
I'm going to give up on myself.
But, like I mentioned, if Ididn't give up on that life I
had created, I had built twobusinesses, I had built a family
, I had built a lot and I nevergave up on them, why would I
(45:44):
give up on myself?
And I fear that sometimes thatI have wanted to throw in the
towel because it gets hard, andI think that's why most people
don't want to try is becausethat familiar chaos that's
really hard.
Speaker 2 (45:59):
It's just gotten comfortable seems easier than a
new lease on life yeah, I justheard something the other day
about throwing in the towel andwhere that came from and it and
it came from being in the fightring and they used a towel to to
(46:19):
kind of clean up and get thefighter back on their feet, to
be back in for the next round.
And then it became throw in thetowel.
When they threw it to themiddle, then okay, the fighter's
done.
And it was kind of like that isreally interesting, you can use
the towel but you don't have tothrow it in.
And it just kind of struck meas a kind of a metaphor to life
(46:46):
of like, yeah, yeah, you, youmight have to clean up a mess
and keep going, but, um, but youknow it, it's, there's strength
within that of cleaning so much.
Speaker 3 (46:58):
Yeah, I mean that that right there just was like
oh wow, it could get messy and,yes, you might have to use that
towel, but don't throw it in.
Speaker 2 (47:06):
Yeah, yeah, I like that.
Can you tell when you need anadventure, where you need to
just put a stop to whatever ofyour day and just go be
adventurous?
Speaker 3 (47:20):
There for a while, no , there for a while, no, um.
But I feel like now, because Iam in more in alignment with
what I want to be doing, um, Iwas pressuring myself a lot so
for a good three or four months,like I had mentioned, with
mentors and things that weren'taligned with me, um, I, I was, I
was constantly working, youknow, constantly feeling like,
(47:41):
well, it has to change nowbecause I've done this and I've
invested in all things and Iwasn't taking the time and I
think that adventurous side andthat creative side and that
thing I talk about this too.
I ask people this when I mentorthem all the time, I'm like when
was the last time you didsomething like that Adventurous
or creative or exciting thatbrings you that passion right,
that, that, that that excitement.
(48:02):
And most oftentimes people arelike you know, and have to think
about it for a while, and thenthey say it and I said, okay,
well, when was the last time youdid it?
So for me, I'm starting torealize that there's days where
I'm like you know what I'm goingto go for, that afternoon walk,
and people are like, why wouldyou do that?
That doesn't sound fun.
Well, for me, it gets me intothe flow, it gets me into.
It actually gets me out of hereand into here.
Speaker 2 (48:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (48:25):
So you got to find those things that do that.
So I think, yes, for a longtime I wasn't listening to that.
I just needed to take a break.
I needed to to pause andreflect.
Speaker 2 (48:41):
Yeah, and I wasn't doing that.
So if you need to take a,longer break.
Speaker 3 (48:43):
What do you like to do?
I love to travel.
My fiance and I really do liketo just take little short
weekends up with our dog and dowhatever we need to.
But you know, I think a lot oftimes a lot of people are
fearful of the pause or fearfulof the stop for a second, and I
was for a really long time.
I heard that from a mentor goshback, even when I was in that
(49:03):
really terrible spot of my lifeand it was you have to slow down
, to speed up, and I was likemakes no sense.
But you know, taking a longerpause sometimes I just got back
from a trip in Mexico and Iliterally had no.
I mean, I had my phone and Ichecked things and I was looking
at things, but I didn't haveany like well, what's going to
happen today?
And it feels good to come back,and I do.
(49:25):
I felt fearful coming back,like how do I get back into
reality?
And I do that sometimes whereI'm like, yeah, well, I got off
the horse and it's hard, youknow, and so I think that's what
people think is like I can'tstop, I'm in this momentum.
But sometimes that momentum isthe thing to say this is where
you need to be, but still liveyour life as well.
Speaker 2 (49:47):
Yeah, wow.
So are you a heart listener ora head listener?
Speaker 3 (50:04):
you must listen to your intuition a lot and I'm
like, well, yes, I do, and so Ithink a lot of times I listen to
okay.
So let me rephrase this I loveto listen to my inner soul, my
heart center, my intuition, Ifeel like sits a little bit more
in kind of in my gut, but Ilove to listen to that.
And I was saying this yesterdayif I don't listen, I am
(50:24):
rewarded with something I don'twant.
If I listen to my head, I'mredirected pretty quickly and
it's like hey, remember what,what, what, what was here and
what was here?
And that's when I've made somepretty poor decisions in my life
and they've had the biggestconsequences.
As when I've made some prettypoor decisions in my life and
(50:45):
they've had the biggestconsequences.
As when I thought with my headand not with my heart or that
inner knowing of is this a gooddecision or is this a decision
that you're making that doesn'tfeel good for you.
Speaker 2 (50:54):
Yeah Well, what would you tell younger Maggie that's
coming, or to prepare for, ordon't do?
Speaker 3 (51:06):
or to prepare for or don't do so.
There's this whole thing onInstagram right now.
That's like this trend of youtook your younger self to coffee
and what did you tell her?
And I think for me, I keepthinking about like what would I
say?
And I'm like, well, first offit wouldn't be coffee, but I
think for me it would be.
It's okay to show up who youwere then, as in, I've always
(51:35):
had a unique trait.
I've always been different.
I've always stood out from thecrowd.
I have never been in thatclique, I have never had that,
and I've always thought ofmyself as different and it
doesn't work, but it actuallytruly is my superpower.
My uniqueness is my superpower,and I am now saying to her like
(51:57):
I love you for who you werethen and I am you now.
I want to show up for you howyou were when you were a kid.
Speaker 2 (52:07):
Huh, I like that.
I like that because you're, youknow.
So many people say just surviveit, you're going to be fine.
That's what I would tell myyounger self and it's like, but
that because you just embraced,you're encouraging.
Don't just survive it, embraceit.
(52:28):
So that's.
I like that, maggie.
We've talked about a whole lotof different things, gone over
many, many subjects.
Is there something that wehaven't touched on, that you
want to make sure we do?
Speaker 3 (52:45):
touched on that you want to make sure we do.
Um, no, I think we've, we've,we've definitely hit a lot of uh
, the the pain and pleasurepoints for me is is how I like
to kind of share who I am andwhat I've gone through.
Um, I think that you know, Ithink just my one thing that
always stands out so much in mylife is is that, like I just
said, is, if you think you'reweird, you think you're
(53:06):
different, you think you're this, embrace that, and that could
be a whole new episode.
But you know, just embraceyourself, embrace who you are.
I mean, we do grow and change,but technically we actually
enhance who we were brought intothis world.
Speaker 4 (53:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (53:25):
Before everybody else decided to say you're weird or
you're this or you're different,or society told you you should
be this way or that way.
Just embrace it, like you justsaid Fully embrace what life is
doing for you.
It's for you, not to you.
I caught that four verses too.
Speaker 2 (53:47):
I like that.
Speaker 3 (53:48):
And I say that all the time and it's funny how it
has become a saying, you know,but that's because life is
happening for you, not to you,and I was told that by a mentor.
It was my first very evermentor and he's a huge celebrity
now at this point and I lovejust listening to the fact that,
like that has stuck with meabout eight years ago that it
(54:09):
was like it happens for you andwhen you can truly decide to
rewire your thought around, it'shappening to me, because to me
is victim, to me is I'm going tosit and suffer, I'm going to be
the one that pouts and I'mgoing to be the one that pouts
and I'm going to be the one thatstomps and says life's unfair.
But when you can say life ishappening for you, you can find
(54:30):
the beauty in the chaos and youcan say I went through this or
this happened to me because Ican now be something else
because I can now be somethingelse.
Speaker 2 (54:46):
That's fabulous.
Speaker 3 (54:49):
How do people follow you, get in touch with you?
Yeah, so my biggest platform orthe place that I am most active
on is Instagram.
Powerwithinherinc andpowerwithinhercom is my website,
and those are the two bestplaces to find out who I am,
what I'm doing, all the eventsthat I'll be hosting and all
different kinds of stuff that'scoming.
(55:10):
It's just, it's been such apleasure to talk with you.
It's been such a goodconversation, but, yes, I love
people connecting with me andsharing their vulnerability and
their takeaways from anythingand everything, and perspective
is such a cool thing for me.
What do you feel?
How do you feel?
Because it's different than howI do.
Speaker 2 (55:29):
Oh, I love that.
And you are able to coach.
You're able to do some of thisvirtually, so people can connect
no matter where they are.
Speaker 3 (55:38):
Yep, absolutely I love to work.
I do love in person because Ijust love as a hairstylist.
So that physical I always sayphysical touch that seems a
little out of context, but, youknow, just being able to feel
and I have an event this weekendand just that, that, that
energy of in person.
But yes, I love virtual becauseit connects me with.
(55:59):
I have, you know, people fromover the world that I work with
and just seeing the difference,the difference in cultures, but
the similarities in life.
Oh isn't that crazy.
Speaker 2 (56:13):
It is.
It is.
It makes the world smaller,more understandable.
Put a face on it and it changesperspective Absolutely Well,
that's great.
I have one more question.
Yes, and you may have alreadyalluded to this a little bit, If
you had a superpower for 24hours, you can use it personally
(56:34):
or professionally whatsuperpower would you choose?
And then, how would you use itand why would that be your
choice?
How would you use it and why?
Speaker 3 (56:43):
would that be your choice?
So I think I have a superpowerof reading people, and so I
think it would be readingsomeone from the inside out, not
from the outside in, becauseoutside in is perspective,
inside out is understanding.
(57:04):
I think.
So how would I use that?
It would be able to be able tomake bigger impact, because when
you look at somebody from theoutside, that's your perspective
, that's your story and that'syour lens.
But if you can actually goinside and work from the inside
and really truly dig into thelayers and the deepness, that's
(57:26):
the person you're looking for.
Speaker 2 (57:29):
Oh, wow, I love that.
That's great, maggie.
Thank you, this has been afabulous conversation.
Speaker 3 (57:35):
Yes, thank you Very much enjoyed.
Speaker 1 (57:38):
It Got my pockets full of dreams and they're
busting at the seams, going boom, boom, boom to my own song.
Speaker 4 (57:59):
Gotta stomp to my own drum, stomp to my own song
Stomp.
Speaker 2 (58:11):
Hey, find stacked keys podcast on spotify,
soundcloud and itunes oranywhere you get your favorite
podcast.
Listen you'll laugh out loudyou, you'll cry a little, you'll
find yourself encouraged.
Join us for casual conversationthat leads itself, based on
where we take it, from family tophilosophy, to work, to meal
(58:32):
prep, to beautifully survivinglife.
And hey, if I could ask a bigfavor of you, go to iTunes and
give us a five rating.
The more people who rate us,the more we get this podcast out
there.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
Speaker 4 (58:52):
Hey, gonna put on my boots and move.
Got a stomp to my own drum,stomp to my own zone, stomp hey,
ooh ooh, gonna sing it out loudand say it real proud.
Speaker 1 (59:15):
Nobody's gonna step on my cloud Cause I stomp, stomp
to the beat of my big drum.
I got a big drum.
Whatever you do, it ain'tnothing on me, because I'm doing
my thing and I got the key toall my wants and all my dreams.
Speaker 4 (59:31):
Yeah, Because I stomp to my own drum, stomp to my own
song, stomp.
Hey, gonna, put on my boots andmove.
Song to my own drum song, to mybig drum song.
(59:51):
Yeah, got my pockets full ofdreams.
Yeah, they've been passing outthe same singing.
Wow, wow.
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