Start Trek

Well if y'all have watched that documentary on Biosphere 2, you know how this episode ends. If you haven't, here's what you should know. Sealing 4 people up in a terraforming base that could be on that "Tiny House" show is a bad idea, especially when one of the actors moonlights as...a Bond KGB antagonist! Just to be clear though he's not in the KGB in the Star Trek Universe. Anyway, these terraformers...

Well we got a doozy this week. This is a pretty middle of the road episode, gotta say. Long story short, a childless planet kidnaps a few kids off of the Enterprise, including Wesley (they have kidnapper's remorse like immediately) but I guess it's bad manners to return kidnapped kids so they're just stuck with him?

No one seems to understand radiation, Chris Hansen is nowhere in sight, and we find out that ...

So we have this dude in super terrible prosthetics who is like in his mid 20s pretending to be 100 and it takes you out of the episode right away. I mean, these are really embarrassing prosthetics. I'm guessing the make up dude responsible for them was just dumped by his significant other and was just phoning it in that week. It's bad. And they forgot to do the actor's hands, so he has the hands of a 20 something.

Well well well, this is exactly why Starfleet needs to update their IT staff and not make them as disposable as Singh, because then episodes like this wouldn't happen. The Enterprise stops by a space base for some R & R and software updates to make the holodeck a little bit less murdery only for it to go awry when the software starts acting crazy!

Picard third wheels a holodate with Riker, I assume Crusher opened ...

Hi guys, so Dave is sick with a stomach flu and yet again we've been foiled by our own weak human blob bodies.

We wanted to do something to celebrate hitting 3,750 downloads, so we are giving away three custom mugs (including shipping) to the first three people who get the questions asked in this segment correct! You have to be speedy and accurate!

Email your answers to anecdotesforawkwardfolks@gmail.com whe...

If you really like left nipples, this is episode is for you! The team visits a matriarchal planet where the women make their men wear navel necks that expose their left nipples. And very tight pants, probs with padding. Because male writers in the 80's totally know what women want to see, so chill ladies, this is for your benefit. 

But don't worry everyone, the diplomatic issue on the planet is solved by the ladi...

Honestly though, what are they teaching at Starfleet Academy? Because it's definitely not good leadership. Or empathy. Picard needs to memorize some Hallmark apology cards or something.

The crew (not Data) decide to invite themselves to Data's home planet where they poke around his past and bring up a homicidal Data doppelgänger  that maybe was left dissembled by the now dead colonists for a reason?  But no, Pica...

Despite depriving his entire crew of some much need free massages and relaxation after the whole "Troi's betrothed jumping ship to chill with ebola Farrah Fawcett," Picard decides he's just too stressed to do his work and instead goes on a selfish adventure in the 1940s on the Holodeck, which apparently is like the Matrix in this episode because if you die in it...you die for real!

This is because it br...

Troi's in for a surprise this episode when a disembodied head spewing rubies announces she's about to tie the knot! But things do "knot" go to plan! Which is good, because Troi's betrothed is obsessed with Farrah Fawcett.

Riker gets pouty as he ponders the loss of his potential friend with benefits, everyone gets psyched for a visit to a spa planet only to thwarted YET AGAIN BY PICARD. 

We...

Finally! They give the people (meaning me and apparently a ton of fan fic writers) what we want! Q reappears and sets his sights on hunky hard to get Riker, they have a playful back and forth and Dave cannot convince me this isn't just a massive set up in the form of a "humanity test" just so Q and Riker can have a lovely date together.

Also, Starfleet is all uppity about warp travel and stuff, but they do n...

You guys. My (Amara’s) favorite burrito place closed down permanently and we found out an hour before recording this episode, so I’m like at an eleven the entire time, sorry in advance. 

Picard is dodgy as heck in my book, and Dave and I recorded over two hours of heated debate about Picard and Ferengi relations which is why this episode is a bit jumpy in some places (I had to trim it down majorly), it got intense, may have been fue...

Hold on to your space britches, the crew finds a super sex positive planet and are about to have a wild party when Wesley wesleys and we end up with a political situation, and is a giant beaver dam/c***block.

Dr. Crusher pretends to understand mechanical engineering, Riker leers, the poor male aliens in this episode have some major discomfort in the crotch region due to odd costume design, Picard is mad inconsistent with s...

So we finally get a South Asian member of the cast and I am totally psyched, but it's short lived. RIP Singh, we hardly knew ye. 

Palpatine makes a surprise guest appearance, we find out Space Apple Pencils may electrocute you, and the Enterprise gets the White Lotus treatment. Also there is some heavy pro vegan messaging from Riker and Yar in this episode y'all.

Happy Holidays, everyone! Thanks for list...

Oh the depths of the writers' room to which they must have descended to write a more irritating character than Wes, in an attempt to make Wes more likeable.

Introducing: Space Elon! He works his assistant basically to near death, doesn't actually know what he's talking about, and basically wrecks everything, tearing the social fabric of the Enterprise asunder. 

Featuring: Warp ponchos! A friend for ...

YIKES.

We recorded an entire episode for "Code of Honor," the episode between "The Naked Now" and "The Last Outpost."

We aren't going to say this TNG episode didn't age well, because it should not have been made in the first place! To be honest, it was tough finding the humor in such a crappy episode - that's not just us saying it, Riker's actor has called it "...

So Dave disagrees, but I am team Ferengi all the way. Listen to the episode and find out why - the Enterprise basically provokes like 90% of the drama.

Oh - Zordon makes a surprise cameo from The Power Rangers, and people are just being rude to Data for absolutely no reason!

Also Picard gets a little too flag happy. Oh and "Doctor" Crusher doesn't understand how cold weather works, and considers eut...

Today we listen to the weirdest episode of Season One,  where people are infected with "Polywater" which is some kind of aphrodisiac or confidence booster, like oysters mixed with cocaine? Dave doesn't know, Amara is just along for the ride. We learn what a "wild party" is by Starfleet standards, and spoiler, it's pretty lame and boring. Amara begins to doubt Dr. Crusher's medical credentials. Oh,...

In our inaugural episode, we take a journey to Farpoint Station, meet Space Hamlet, Riker's* immaculate hair, Wesley's stupid sweater, Troi's feelings, potential psycho droid Data, colorblind Dr. Crusher, and a really chill guy named Groppler who is toootally not sinister AT ALL, in fact he could make his mark as a weatherman since his name rhymes with doppler. 

Ohhh, also, we meet Professor X pre-wheelchair...

Join us for the thrilling conclusion of something* something at Farpoint! In which we see a grumpy Levar Burton (probably because his glasses won't let him read books), Riker does not show appropriate deference to Levar which makes me mad as the Reading Rainbow was an important part of my developmental years, Space Hamlet (Q)'s costume budget runs out, the Weather Groppler has a courteous torturer, and we maybe see some X...