#29. Does Your Relocation Journey Lack True Connection? Here’s the Hard Truth About Expat Life

Have you ever returned home only to realize you no longer feel at home there?

For many expat women, the journey of relocation is full of unexpected emotions—missing one community while trying to rebuild another, questioning identity, and wondering where “home” truly is. This episode dives into that very struggle, showing how the USA can still hold promise despite its imperfections.

The surprising reasons moving back to England left me missing the USA more than expected.

Press play now to uncover a heartfelt perspective on creating home, no matter where life takes you.

To share your own migration story or feedback email  [e-mail] 

This compelling podcast dives into Expat and immigrant women (and men) stories. Those who immigrate to the USA, tackling the struggles of homesickness, identity crisis, and culture shock in the USA while adjusting to expat life and navigating cultural differences. Through conversations on starting over, reinventing yourself, and finding purpose, it highlights success stories of women's tenacity, and the resilience of expats in the USA. It offers insights into bicultural identity, language barriers, and the challenges of living overseas. The podcast emphasizes the importance of a strong support system and wellbeing for women in pursuit of the American dream.

https://www.instagram.com/theplaces_wecallhome

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hey, my friend.
It's so good to be back.
In this episode, I am sharingthe reasons why I left England
and returned with a family tothe USA in 2025, and what's been
on my mind these past fewmonths.
Welcome to starting over in theUSA, the Expat Woman's Guide to

(00:23):
overcoming homesickness,embracing cultural differences,
and creating a new home awayfrom home.
On this podcast, we talk aboutleaving behind the familiar, you
know, the pangs of homesicknessand culture shock to the
journeys of reinventingyourself.
I'm Yolanda Reshemah.
And after relocating six times,I know firsthand what it's like

(00:46):
to start from scratch, feelinglike both a foreign child and a
foreign adult in a new world.
You are going to take away fromthis episode the positive that
still exists in the USA todayfor you.
And why you should never give uphope.
Despite its imperfections andchallenges, this place still

(01:11):
holds a kind of promise that'sworth talking about.
We just returned.
From a year abroad with thefamily.
We went to England to spend timewith my parents because, well,
they're at that age and.
I took a break from recording toslow down and pay attention and

(01:32):
to reflect, and that pause ledme into some deep thinking about
where I've been, what I'velearned, and who I've become.
But the one thing that's reallystood out is the fact that I've
been relocating since I was 10from the Caribbean to England,
from England to France as ayoung adult.

(01:55):
Then back again, then over tothe USA as a newlywed and now.
Back to Europe with a child andhusband and each move came with
its own demands, its ownlessons, different attitudes,
different responsibilities.

(02:16):
But through all that, I haveremained me.
Just evolving.
And yet with every move, somefeelings always seem to follow.
There are familiar questionsthat just seem to echo again and
again.

(02:37):
Will I be okay?
Will I thrive here?
Am I gonna feel the same?
Will I still love it?
Will I, will I feel lonely?
Have I changed much?
But.
When we moved back to Englandlast summer, I was expecting to
feel grounded.
I was returning to the placewhere I was raised, surrounded

(02:59):
by old friends and bloodrelatives, and the comfort I
belonged for not as a visitor,but but as somebody who
belonged.
But what caught me off guard washow deeply I missed the life
we'd built in the USA.
I missed the fellow moms whowalked with me, the quiet spots

(03:21):
that we shared, the people whocried with me when my sister
passed suddenly 18 months ago.
I miss the community that knewmy dreams and the people who
cheered me on, and who held meaccountable to this podcast.
I even missed the herb garden atthe back.
Who would've thought Californiahad become my home.

(03:45):
Not just a place where I live,but the place where I grew into
myself, the person that I amright now, it's where I became a
mother.
It's where midlife found me.
It's where I stopped caring somuch about what others thought.
It's where I dance in thesupermarket aisles and embarrass
my poor kid.
It's where I found the courageto bring my ambitions to life,

(04:10):
and that realization actuallysnuck up on me.
I thought about whether or notthis place is actually more home
than England, even though myoldest friends and closest
relatives are in England.
The answer is, I don't knowright now, but I do know it is

(04:31):
home.
I really, truly feel stronglythat we are not defined by our
locations, by our country.
We are defined by our values,our humor, our resilience, our
humanity, the stuff that is atour core.
These things don't disappear,when we move, they show up.

(04:54):
They just adapt, they expand.,now we are settling into a new
school or, well, we're trying tosettle into a new school and to
get to grips with everythingthat's going on here.
But so far, so good.
And I, I'm so very aware thatthat is not the story for

(05:15):
everyone.
For us right now.
I can say so far so good.
And When that changes.
I will be here to let you know.
And incidentally, whilst we werepacking our house up and getting
ready to move and lettingeverybody know that we were
moving back.
So many people said to us, whyare you going?

(05:38):
Your daughter loves school here.
You love it here.
Why are you moving back?
Just stay.
And they were so happy to giveher many reasons why we ought to
remain, and I could think ofmany myself.
However, this is home.
And these are some of thereasons why we did actually

(06:01):
choose to come back to the us.
First, there's a, a, yes you canenergy here.
And it's not perfect.
Nowhere is certainly not inEngland, in France, Switzerland,
Germany, anywhere that we'vetraveled, I would never say that
anywhere is absolutely perfect.

(06:23):
But most definitely, it'spersistent Here, the people that
I've had the courage to bearound are generous with their
encouragement, and they arepersistent with their expertise
and their belief in what'spossible.
Here, you'll find people whowant to build with you, build
businesses, communities,rituals.

(06:45):
You'll meet minds that matchyour fire.
There's space to invent, tostart again, to fail and try
again.
And here that feels okay.
There's no shame in it.
There are people here I find whounderstand you, who want to know

(07:06):
you.
Who will help bring your valueto the surface.
true.
Belonging comes from the rightrelationships, not geography.
And I've also learned that youcan be surrounded by people
you've known all your life andstill somehow feel like an

(07:27):
outsider.
Home is where you grow.
And i've Definitely grown here,I'm excited to be back dreaming
again connected again andco-creating again.
It's been a pleasure to hearfrom some of you already your
stories are fascinating.

(07:48):
Interestingly, during ourtravels I met with people who
are curious about our decisionto move for a year.
Remember episode 22 when wetalked about the reasons we use
to tell ourselves.
Not to move abroad.
That episode was actuallyinspired by a group of women I
met in a spa in England, andtheir emotions were real.

(08:10):
If you haven't listened toepisode 22 yet, go and take a
listen.
Next week I'll be sharing aconversation with a clinical
psychologist, somebody whoreached out to me all the way
from Singapore, to expand on somany of the topics we've already
touched on, the tips and thestrategies I've shared with you

(08:31):
to overcome homesickness andfeeling isolated, dealing with
cultural differences, but fromthe perspective of a
psychologist.
talking about the impact oflocating what we go through, how
it shows up, and practical stepsin how to navigate.
You'll hear her insightsalongside my lived experiences

(08:53):
and more from my guests who willbe sharing the truth about their
relocation stories, how theyhave grown, where they now call
home the positives and thechallenges that they have
experienced, just so that youwill never, ever have to feel
like you are starting all byyourself.

(09:16):
That's me for today.
I love sharing with you, and Iwould love to hear from you,
your stories, your reflections,your questions.
Email me, just message me andlet's connect.
So until next time, remember.
You are not defined by yourlocation.

(09:38):
Countries change and things goup.
Things go down.
You know how it is, you aredefined by your values.
By humor, and by yourresilience.
Those parts of you.
They travel and they travelwell.
Have a lovely day.