September 17, 2025 • 10 mins
The unexpected intensity of perimenopause symptoms can be shocking and disruptive, even when you think you understand what's happening. A recent episode of hormone-induced depression forced me to reconsider my approach to managing this transition and validated the need for more open conversations about women's health experiences.
• Unpredictability is one of the most challenging aspects of perimenopause
• Hormonal shifts can cause physical symptoms like nausea and dizziness with little warning
• Depression-like symptoms can descend quickly, feeling like "a fog of sadness"
• Natural approaches may not be sufficient for managing severe symptoms
• Considering hormone replacement therapy after trying natural remedies
• Children notice and are affected by parental mood changes during hormonal shifts
• Important to validate women's experiences instead of dismissing them as "crazy"
• Open conversations about perimenopause are essential but too rare
If you're experiencing similar struggles with perimenopause, know that your feelings are valid. I'm here as a resource and happy to point you toward helpful information as we navigate this journey together.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
One.
This is Steel vs Podcast.
This podcast is created forwomen, by women, to elevate
women's voices.
I am very happy to be sittinghere talking with you today
because I have been kind offrazzled this week.
As you can tell, the firstepisode this week was rolling
out on Wednesday.
I try to do Monday, wednesday,fridays, but you know my motto
is giving myself grace.
(00:21):
I have to lean into that prettyhard, normally have like a
stock of little you know thingsthat I see online or just play
little thought starters that Ilike to bring to everybody just
for your own food, for thought.
But I've given a lot ofhonestly time thinking about
wanting to record an episodethis week to relay something
(00:41):
that's impacting me prettyintensely.
So I'm going to go with thatbecause it's something that's
really been kind of brutal forme and I think if I'm going
through it, I know some of youare too and I'd really like to
maybe even the playing fieldhere a little bit and let you
know that you're not crazy.
So I've mentioned a few timesbefore probably more in the past
year about going throughperimenopause and what that
(01:05):
means and like how that'saffected me, and I've talked
about the fatigue quite a bit,and I have talked a little bit
about like cycle syncing and how, with my cycle, there's certain
like the week before is kind oflike my dark cloud week, where
I'm a little bit more sensitive,a little bit more ragey, like
whatever.
What has happened recently is ashift.
Now, unfortunately, a large partof our bodies especially for
(01:28):
women as we get older is thatthere's a lot of
unpredictability aroundperimenopause and menopause.
There is unpredictable amountof time that you're going to be
going through everything.
There's unpredictability aboutthe kind of symptoms you're
going to get and the intensityof the symptoms that you're
going to get.
Some people don't have anysymptoms at all.
They fly right through it.
It doesn't affect them, theyjust stop being deteriorated,
(01:49):
and they're perfectly happy withthat.
I am not one of these people,so I and I don't even have it
that bad.
I'm only in the tip of theiceberg.
What I'm seeing here, though,and part of my concern for all
of you, was that I'm goingthrough what I'm going through,
but I can step back, and I dorealize when something is
(02:09):
happening to me that isn'tnormal to me and for me, I don't
lean into it.
I almost step back objectivelyand say okay, jenny, I know we
feel this way or I know this iswhat's happening, but the
reality is I don't think this isreal and I think this is going
to pass.
So, most notably past weekend,I started getting hormone shift
(02:30):
symptoms and normally for me,when I have a hormone shift or
you know, and this is to me Icall it hormone shift because I
don't know what else to call itbut I can feel something
happening inside my body.
It's like a sense.
I don't know how to describe itand I bet you, some of you, are
nodding along, going yes, weknow, we know what you're
talking about.
So it's a sense.
I get a sense that something isshifting in my body.
(02:55):
Now, this past week it felt likeI'm a little bit nauseous.
I started to get like kind ofdizzy.
I just had like an overall,like kind of icky feeling, think
like really low grade, likemorning sickness, Like that's
kind of how it felt.
It just felt like kind ofcrappy.
Nothing I couldn't handle,obviously.
But I took note and I was likeokay, this is happening.
And I looked at the calendar.
I was like it's not really theright time for anything to be
happening.
I don't really know why this ishappening, but I noted it.
(03:18):
That was like maybe Friday toSaturday, sunday comes along and
I'm pretty volatile and I'myelling at my kids and I'm, you
know, really just honestly beinga jerk.
And you know, I was with mydaughters and my kids are very
aware that you know when myperiod is coming or when I have
it.
I'm not going to be myself.
And so my one daughter asked me.
(03:40):
She was like mommy, what'swrong?
Like why are you acting likethis?
Do you have your period?
And I'm like I try not to laughabout it, but I thought it was
funny because she's a young girl, she's only eight, and for her
to really already acknowledgethis I appreciate it.
But I was like I don't know andI said I legitimately said I
was like I don't know why I'macting like this.
I was like I think it's myhormones so pretty volatile
(04:05):
Sunday and I started to get thisfeeling.
Now, if any of you haveexperienced depression, you'll
know what I'm talking about whenI describe this and I'm going
to try to describe this to thebest of my ability.
But it felt like a fog ofsadness settling over me slowly.
It was almost the best possibleway I can say it, because it
was really slow moving and itwas really light and at first it
(04:26):
was just like all right, jenny,you're going to cry a lot today
.
Like you can deal with that,you know, just kind of make
light of it, it is what it is.
But then it got heavier,heavier and I was going to sleep
on Sunday night, basicallypraying that I would wake up on
Monday and be okay.
Unfortunately that was not thecase and I woke up on Monday
even worse, and it felt like,because I've gone through
(04:49):
depression, it felt like one ofthe days of like my worst
depression episodes, where youdon't want to do anything, you
want to just lay in a ball andjust cry out all day.
Now my husband poor thing, blesshis soul and his heart didn't
really know.
Obviously he doesn't know, hedoesn't know what's going on
inside my body and I'm notreally forthcoming.
I mean, I am forthcoming, butyou know he didn't know, like
(05:11):
leading up to like oh, in myhead, like what had been
happening, and so he thought Ijust got overwhelmed and you
know he was trying to comfort meand tell me it's okay, like
just take things one step at atime, don't.
And I was like no, no, that'snot it.
And I had to explain to himlike it's like this weight of
sadness, like just kind ofhanging over me, just like a
weight, and I was like I'mtrying to shake it off, but I
(05:32):
can't seem to shake it off and Iwas like I I don't know what to
do.
And you know, I found it.
I was panicking a little bitbecause, logically, I know that
sadness, that kind of depression, sadness, has no place here.
I'm okay.
Yet I couldn't.
It was just there Now, slowly,throughout the day, and this is
what I said to my husband.
(05:52):
I was like it's going to goaway.
It's truly just like a hormoneimbalance and then we go back to
balance, like it is what it is.
And it did.
And by the end of the day I wasfeeling a little bit more like
myself.
By Tuesday I was back to myself.
Today I'm even better, a betterversion of myself, or probably
the best version of myself.
The part that's mind blowing tome is that this even happens
(06:15):
Like to be perfectly transparent.
This level, this intensitylevel, I shocked me.
This time it really did.
It knocked me for a loop,because normally I know what's
happening.
I can feel it.
I try to take it easy on myself, I try to like.
This one was like out of theblue.
I wasn't expecting it, I wasnot prepared for it, I was kind
(06:35):
of frazzled with it Because ofall that.
It really forced me to take aminute, to take a step back.
Now, what I've been doing overthe past year or so or a couple
of years is I've beeninvestigating, like, natural
pathways to dealing withperimenopause and menopause.
There's a lot of products outthere that you can leverage for
support.
So I've tried pretty much allof them because I, you know,
(07:00):
truly would like to take anatural approach to my body
transitioning into, you know,being a I can't say adult a
grown woman.
No, you know what I mean Olderwoman.
So I'm trying to, you know,just prepare myself for that,
help my body along.
But this episode really scaredme.
Now there's a couple things tooto it that I'm just like you
(07:21):
know, do I really want to playRussian roulette with my life?
And just, you know, not knowwhat's going to be happening and
how my home is going to shift,and just have to go with that?
You know what, if it shifts ona really momentous day where I'm
where I really want to be happyand I can't because I'm, like,
devastated by, you know, ahormone shift, like I don't want
to live a life where I can'thave any rhyme or reason.
(07:43):
So I have made an appointmentwith my doctor to discuss next
steps for potentially, hormonereplacement therapy.
Now there's a lot ofinformation out there for
hormone replacement therapy thatkind of goes either direction.
There's a lot of people thatare against it, completely
against it.
There's information that says,like, hormone replacement
(08:06):
therapy causes cancer.
I can say that because of thework that I do, that I'm
considering hormone replacementtherapy because for me and for
my health and for my currentsituation, I think this is going
to be a good solve.
It's going to address a lot ofperimenopause symptoms that are
irritating, that I've just beendealing with because I didn't
(08:27):
really want to put a productinto my body.
But now I'm at a point where Iwant to take that leap and I
want to take that step because Idon't really want to put a
product into my body.
But now I'm at a point where Iwant to take that leap and I
want to take that step because Idon't want to live a life that
I can't have any kind of controlover this part.
There is a part of me that isstill hesitant because, as I
said, like I'd like to addressthis naturally, but I don't.
I know what I don't want and Iknow I don't want my kids
(08:49):
growing up with a mom who isfalling to pieces the way that I
did on Monday.
Now they didn't really see it,but I felt it and I don't want
to feel like that.
So I wanted to share all thatwith you, because I think that
these conversations do nothappen often enough.
I think that we're not ashonest with each other about
this part of our lives, becauseit is very personal and it is
(09:13):
very hard to share it, to beperfectly honest with you,
because you do feel a little bitcrazy, like what.
I can't deal with my own body,like what.
This is ridiculous, but it isthat, like really it is that.
So I will keep you all informedas I make my way through this
journey, as I always have beenand I always will.
I wanted to share this with youguys again, because I think
(09:35):
there's probably some of you outthere that are experiencing
similar things and being toldyou know, get over it, or you're
being told you're crazy, you'rebeing told it's in your head,
you're being told a lot ofthings and basically your
feelings are not being validated.
And I'm here to tell you thatyou have a valid reason for
feeling everything that you'refeeling, and I am here as a
(09:57):
resource and happy to point youin the direction of some good
resources out there that couldhelp you navigate this.
So I appreciate all of you withme.
I appreciate you guys hangingin there with me when I have
these off moments where I can'tget an episode recorded.
I hope to have you guys on withme on this journey for many,
(10:17):
many, many more episodes to come.
Thank you all so much and Iwill catch you on the next one.
Take care.
One.
This is Steel vs Podcast.
This podcast is created forwomen, by women, to elevate
women's voices.
I am very happy to be sittinghere talking with you today
because I have been kind offrazzled this week.
As you can tell, the firstepisode this week was rolling
out on Wednesday.
I try to do Monday, wednesday,fridays, but you know my motto
is giving myself grace.
(00:21):
I have to lean into that prettyhard, normally have like a
stock of little you know thingsthat I see online or just play
little thought starters that Ilike to bring to everybody just
for your own food, for thought.
But I've given a lot ofhonestly time thinking about
wanting to record an episodethis week to relay something
(00:41):
that's impacting me prettyintensely.
So I'm going to go with thatbecause it's something that's
really been kind of brutal forme and I think if I'm going
through it, I know some of youare too and I'd really like to
maybe even the playing fieldhere a little bit and let you
know that you're not crazy.
So I've mentioned a few timesbefore probably more in the past
year about going throughperimenopause and what that
(01:05):
means and like how that'saffected me, and I've talked
about the fatigue quite a bit,and I have talked a little bit
about like cycle syncing and how, with my cycle, there's certain
like the week before is kind oflike my dark cloud week, where
I'm a little bit more sensitive,a little bit more ragey, like
whatever.
What has happened recently is ashift.
Now, unfortunately, a large partof our bodies especially for
(01:28):
women as we get older is thatthere's a lot of
unpredictability aroundperimenopause and menopause.
There is unpredictable amountof time that you're going to be
going through everything.
There's unpredictability aboutthe kind of symptoms you're
going to get and the intensityof the symptoms that you're
going to get.
Some people don't have anysymptoms at all.
They fly right through it.
It doesn't affect them, theyjust stop being deteriorated,
(01:49):
and they're perfectly happy withthat.
I am not one of these people,so I and I don't even have it
that bad.
I'm only in the tip of theiceberg.
What I'm seeing here, though,and part of my concern for all
of you, was that I'm goingthrough what I'm going through,
but I can step back, and I dorealize when something is
(02:09):
happening to me that isn'tnormal to me and for me, I don't
lean into it.
I almost step back objectivelyand say okay, jenny, I know we
feel this way or I know this iswhat's happening, but the
reality is I don't think this isreal and I think this is going
to pass.
So, most notably past weekend,I started getting hormone shift
(02:30):
symptoms and normally for me,when I have a hormone shift or
you know, and this is to me Icall it hormone shift because I
don't know what else to call itbut I can feel something
happening inside my body.
It's like a sense.
I don't know how to describe itand I bet you, some of you, are
nodding along, going yes, weknow, we know what you're
talking about.
So it's a sense.
I get a sense that something isshifting in my body.
(02:55):
Now, this past week it felt likeI'm a little bit nauseous.
I started to get like kind ofdizzy.
I just had like an overall,like kind of icky feeling, think
like really low grade, likemorning sickness, Like that's
kind of how it felt.
It just felt like kind ofcrappy.
Nothing I couldn't handle,obviously.
But I took note and I was likeokay, this is happening.
And I looked at the calendar.
I was like it's not really theright time for anything to be
happening.
I don't really know why this ishappening, but I noted it.
(03:18):
That was like maybe Friday toSaturday, sunday comes along and
I'm pretty volatile and I'myelling at my kids and I'm, you
know, really just honestly beinga jerk.
And you know, I was with mydaughters and my kids are very
aware that you know when myperiod is coming or when I have
it.
I'm not going to be myself.
And so my one daughter asked me.
(03:40):
She was like mommy, what'swrong?
Like why are you acting likethis?
Do you have your period?
And I'm like I try not to laughabout it, but I thought it was
funny because she's a young girl, she's only eight, and for her
to really already acknowledgethis I appreciate it.
But I was like I don't know andI said I legitimately said I
was like I don't know why I'macting like this.
I was like I think it's myhormones so pretty volatile
(04:05):
Sunday and I started to get thisfeeling.
Now, if any of you haveexperienced depression, you'll
know what I'm talking about whenI describe this and I'm going
to try to describe this to thebest of my ability.
But it felt like a fog ofsadness settling over me slowly.
It was almost the best possibleway I can say it, because it
was really slow moving and itwas really light and at first it
(04:26):
was just like all right, jenny,you're going to cry a lot today
.
Like you can deal with that,you know, just kind of make
light of it, it is what it is.
But then it got heavier,heavier and I was going to sleep
on Sunday night, basicallypraying that I would wake up on
Monday and be okay.
Unfortunately that was not thecase and I woke up on Monday
even worse, and it felt like,because I've gone through
(04:49):
depression, it felt like one ofthe days of like my worst
depression episodes, where youdon't want to do anything, you
want to just lay in a ball andjust cry out all day.
Now my husband poor thing, blesshis soul and his heart didn't
really know.
Obviously he doesn't know, hedoesn't know what's going on
inside my body and I'm notreally forthcoming.
I mean, I am forthcoming, butyou know he didn't know, like
(05:11):
leading up to like oh, in myhead, like what had been
happening, and so he thought Ijust got overwhelmed and you
know he was trying to comfort meand tell me it's okay, like
just take things one step at atime, don't.
And I was like no, no, that'snot it.
And I had to explain to himlike it's like this weight of
sadness, like just kind ofhanging over me, just like a
weight, and I was like I'mtrying to shake it off, but I
(05:32):
can't seem to shake it off and Iwas like I I don't know what to
do.
And you know, I found it.
I was panicking a little bitbecause, logically, I know that
sadness, that kind of depression, sadness, has no place here.
I'm okay.
Yet I couldn't.
It was just there Now, slowly,throughout the day, and this is
what I said to my husband.
(05:52):
I was like it's going to goaway.
It's truly just like a hormoneimbalance and then we go back to
balance, like it is what it is.
And it did.
And by the end of the day I wasfeeling a little bit more like
myself.
By Tuesday I was back to myself.
Today I'm even better, a betterversion of myself, or probably
the best version of myself.
The part that's mind blowing tome is that this even happens
(06:15):
Like to be perfectly transparent.
This level, this intensitylevel, I shocked me.
This time it really did.
It knocked me for a loop,because normally I know what's
happening.
I can feel it.
I try to take it easy on myself, I try to like.
This one was like out of theblue.
I wasn't expecting it, I wasnot prepared for it, I was kind
(06:35):
of frazzled with it Because ofall that.
It really forced me to take aminute, to take a step back.
Now, what I've been doing overthe past year or so or a couple
of years is I've beeninvestigating, like, natural
pathways to dealing withperimenopause and menopause.
There's a lot of products outthere that you can leverage for
support.
So I've tried pretty much allof them because I, you know,
(07:00):
truly would like to take anatural approach to my body
transitioning into, you know,being a I can't say adult a
grown woman.
No, you know what I mean Olderwoman.
So I'm trying to, you know,just prepare myself for that,
help my body along.
But this episode really scaredme.
Now there's a couple things tooto it that I'm just like you
(07:21):
know, do I really want to playRussian roulette with my life?
And just, you know, not knowwhat's going to be happening and
how my home is going to shift,and just have to go with that?
You know what, if it shifts ona really momentous day where I'm
where I really want to be happyand I can't because I'm, like,
devastated by, you know, ahormone shift, like I don't want
to live a life where I can'thave any rhyme or reason.
(07:43):
So I have made an appointmentwith my doctor to discuss next
steps for potentially, hormonereplacement therapy.
Now there's a lot ofinformation out there for
hormone replacement therapy thatkind of goes either direction.
There's a lot of people thatare against it, completely
against it.
There's information that says,like, hormone replacement
(08:06):
therapy causes cancer.
I can say that because of thework that I do, that I'm
considering hormone replacementtherapy because for me and for
my health and for my currentsituation, I think this is going
to be a good solve.
It's going to address a lot ofperimenopause symptoms that are
irritating, that I've just beendealing with because I didn't
(08:27):
really want to put a productinto my body.
But now I'm at a point where Iwant to take that leap and I
want to take that step because Idon't really want to put a
product into my body.
But now I'm at a point where Iwant to take that leap and I
want to take that step because Idon't want to live a life that
I can't have any kind of controlover this part.
There is a part of me that isstill hesitant because, as I
said, like I'd like to addressthis naturally, but I don't.
I know what I don't want and Iknow I don't want my kids
(08:49):
growing up with a mom who isfalling to pieces the way that I
did on Monday.
Now they didn't really see it,but I felt it and I don't want
to feel like that.
So I wanted to share all thatwith you, because I think that
these conversations do nothappen often enough.
I think that we're not ashonest with each other about
this part of our lives, becauseit is very personal and it is
(09:13):
very hard to share it, to beperfectly honest with you,
because you do feel a little bitcrazy, like what.
I can't deal with my own body,like what.
This is ridiculous, but it isthat, like really it is that.
So I will keep you all informedas I make my way through this
journey, as I always have beenand I always will.
I wanted to share this with youguys again, because I think
(09:35):
there's probably some of you outthere that are experiencing
similar things and being toldyou know, get over it, or you're
being told you're crazy, you'rebeing told it's in your head,
you're being told a lot ofthings and basically your
feelings are not being validated.
And I'm here to tell you thatyou have a valid reason for
feeling everything that you'refeeling, and I am here as a
(09:57):
resource and happy to point youin the direction of some good
resources out there that couldhelp you navigate this.
So I appreciate all of you withme.
I appreciate you guys hangingin there with me when I have
these off moments where I can'tget an episode recorded.
I hope to have you guys on withme on this journey for many,
(10:17):
many, many more episodes to come.
Thank you all so much and Iwill catch you on the next one.
Take care.
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