October 10, 2025 • 35 mins
Despite having regular mammograms and being previously told she had benign fibrocystic breast tissue, Kim received news that would change everything. The confusion of conflicting test results and constantly changing treatment plans taught her what would become her mantra: "Prepare for the plan to change." This wisdom carried her through surgery, chemotherapy, and the difficult decisions that followed. Kim's transformation was ‘pivoted’ into an opportunity learning to prioritize her own needs and desires after a lifetime of people-pleasing.
The ripple effects of this mindset shift have touched every area of Kim's life. At 58, she joined a business partnership, embracing uncertainty and opportunity with newfound confidence. She's developed a passion for health and wellness, researching mitochondrial function and metabolic health with the awareness that none of us is invincible. Most importantly, she's learned to put herself first – to do what brings her joy before tackling obligations.
Guest Bio:
Kim Kelleher is a Luminary at Luma Accounting, a bookkeeping/accounting firm (no tax!) committed to helping small- and medium-sized businesses gain clarity around their finances. Luma’s “secret sauce” is the blending of accounting, technology and process - this gives clients not only the accounting support they need, but also helps identify opportunities for innovation through technology and processes changes. The firm was born from the merger between Kim and her business partner Heather Deibele - they found they shared the same values and both craved collaboration. Together, they built a 100% remote, work-on-your-own-time and highly collaborative model designed to support US-based women seeking flexible but meaningful work.
Now at Luma, Kim is focused on ensuring the firm’s mission of BEST. EXPERIENCE. EVER., both for clients and for team members.
Connect with Kim:
Connect with Theresa and Ivana:
Theresa, True Strategy Consultants: tsc-consultants.com
LinkedIn @treeconti, Insta @tscconsultants
Ivana, Courageous Being: courageousbeing.com
LinkedIn @ivipol, Insta @courbeing
SITP team, Step Into The Pivot: stepintothepivot.com
LinkedIn @step-into-the-pivot, YouTube @StepIntoThePivot
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_00 (00:03):
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode
of Step Into the Pivot.
And this is a special episode.
We are continuing our workaround October Breast Cancer
Awareness Month.
And uh this is the month wherewe uplift and celebrate women
who have had personal directexperience with breast cancer.
(00:26):
And um, this is the month wherewe then showcase some of the
stories.
We're so grateful to have aguest today who is willing to
tell her story, Kim Kelleher.
Kim, welcome to the show.
SPEAKER_01 (00:38):
Thank you for having me.
I mean, I kind of wish I didn'thave to be on this one.
Wouldn't we all that have hadthat?
But um I really appreciate youletting me talk about my story.
SPEAKER_00 (00:50):
Yes, and I will let Teresa introduce you more.
I know that the two of you alsoprepped for this call, quote
unquote, and by prep, I mean youhad deeper conversations because
as um our listeners who've beenfollowing us know, Teresa, you
too personally have had theexperience with breast cancer.
And this is one of the reasonswhy we started doing this show,
because this was, you know, youroriginal big pivot that you
(01:12):
wanted to talk about.
So I'll let you furtherintroduce Kim.
I do have to say for everybodywho is listening to us on audio,
if you check out our YouTubechannel and you see the two
women I'm speaking to today,they both are so vibrant and
full of health and vitality.
And that is one of the you knowbig messages that we're bringing
through today.
You know, how do you stayhealthy and um and thriving in
(01:34):
the face of big stuff like theC-Words?
So, Teresa, please take it away.
For sure.
SPEAKER_02 (01:40):
So yeah, uh, as Evie said, you know, Kim and I
actually got to meet uh lastyear at a retreat, um, and we
had an amazing connection, youknow, and it's it's not just the
breast cancer that connects you,although you do, because what
you learn is you're not alone,right?
And I think to me, that's alwaysthe biggest message.
(02:01):
And I really um enjoyed theopportunity to talk to her there
and that she was willing to comeon because telling the story is
not always easy, right?
It's not always where you're at.
And even though you're at a goodplace now, it's always something
to think about, right?
And and I think Kim, we're gonnatalk about that a little bit.
So, like Evie said, thank you somuch for being on.
We really do appreciate it.
(02:21):
And I'm gonna jump right in.
Tell us a little about yourstory, tell us the background of
your story, how you discoveredit, you know, and and a little
bit about that.
SPEAKER_01 (02:34):
Okay, so um if you just sort of start with the fact
that I had been told for yearsduring exams, because I went
every year, I was good, I didall that, but um, I was told I
have fibrocystic breast tissue,which, you know, apparently was
pretty common.
So every time I heard that, Ikind of was like, Yeah, yeah,
(02:55):
I'm fine.
And then uh there was a time inthe early 2000s once I had had
kids where a mammogram showedsomething that they said, you
know, we want to do a what theycall a core biopsy.
I'm like, okay.
So went and did that and endedup finding out there was nothing
(03:15):
that they thought was uh, youknow, really suspicious.
So then you get to the annualmammogram in 2018, and that
showed like suspicious kind offlakes across the way they
described it, and they wanted todo a core biopsy biopsy.
So I literally took theradiologist aside and I said,
listen, I've been through thisbefore.
(03:36):
Uh, I'm sure it is nothing.
They've already done this.
And he's like, Oh, I wanted me.
He was so nice given what I wasdoing.
But um he said, No, we reallywant to do it.
So I had it, and then uh it wasmy birthday.
It was like I had my birthday onthe 13th of August, and it was
on the 14th that I got a phonecall from Kaiser, and someone
(03:56):
said, Hi, I'm calling from asthe nurse, you know, from
whatever the breast cancerplace, and I need to tell you
you have IDC and went on.
And I was like, Hold on, arethis is Kim Kelleher?
Have you actually called theright person?
Like I was so convinced allalong this is nothing that when
(04:17):
she said it and I realized thatit was actually true, I mean,
I'm actually like getting alittle goosebumps because it's
like it is this most shockingthing that has ever happened to
me.
And um, anyway, I like that'sanother time for the day.
What I I mean, I had to driveimmediately to my husband's
office, which was close enough,and close the door and just
(04:39):
immediately burst into tears.
And was and then we told thewhole family immediately.
So, this is one of the things Iwill also mention is that I am a
person who needs to talk aboutstuff.
And I was completely open witheveryone.
I posted on Facebook, I starteda caring bridge blog, I wrote a
ton for anybody that wanted toknow.
(05:01):
And that's not going to be foreverybody.
So the good news is people canhave different ways of dealing
with this, but I did that.
So um anyway, they thought thatI had a five centimeter tumor,
which my brain at this point isnow completely not able to
think, not able to processinformation.
(05:23):
And so they were like, we thinkit's five centimeters.
My kids are like, Mom, that'slike two and a half inches.
So they thought it could beeverywhere.
So I'm about to take my son tocollege for the first time on
the East Coast, and they said,We got to get in a PET scan
before you go.
So we do the PET scan, and I amit was actually this great thing
(05:44):
to take him because I had tofocus on something else, because
otherwise the hours that go byare interminable.
So I take him, and it was whileI was there that I got a phone
call, and they said, Guess what?
The great news is nothing lit upthroughout the rest of your
body.
And I'm like, thank goodness.
And they said, but what's weirdis nothing lit up in your breast
(06:07):
either.
And now no one knows what'shappening.
And now I'm like, did they getthis wrong?
And anyway, so they said, Well,the the plan had been I'm you're
gonna have chemo to shrink thistumor, then we're gonna do
surgery and yada, yada.
And I met with enough peoplethat someone told me prepare for
the plan to change.
(06:28):
And that was the best advice Igot because literally things
changed all the time.
Okay, so then they said themedical oncologist goes, You
can't tell me what size, what'sgoing on here.
I'm not treating her.
So suddenly the plan flips,you're gonna have surgery.
We don't know what we're gonnafind.
And the surgeon is like, We aredoing a single mastectomy, there
(06:50):
is no reconstruction at thistime.
If you want any of that, we willtake care of that later.
Even if you want to double rightnow, we are not going to do it.
And that was like a gift becauseI didn't have to make any
choices looking back.
And I think about people who arelike, Oh, what do you want to
do?
And I I was just lucky to beleft out of that.
So, so I knew going in, gonnacome out of this flat, and we'll
(07:13):
figure out what's going on.
Anyway, the end result was therewas stuff all through ducts,
cancerous cells, but it onlycome out in two little spots.
And so they're like, Oh, this isgreat.
But in the three lymph nodesthat they took, one of them had
isolated tumor cells, whichmeans that you can actually,
according to all the statistics,ignore it, but they're like, we
(07:35):
don't want to ignore it.
So would you be willing to dochemo?
And I'm like, I am willing to dowhatever I can to not be in this
position again.
So I say, yep, we'll do it.
So um that is we go intosurgery.
I have surgery that actuallywent just fine, was great.
And then you start getting readyfor uh chemo.
(07:58):
And that's when I was like, um,I cannot believe I'm facing
this.
And I ended up finding out thatthere was a naturopathic doctor
focusing on oncology here inPortland, Rose Paisley is her
name.
And I met with her and shehelped me put together this plan
of listen, here are all thesesupplements, here's what they
do, this is why you're takingit.
(08:20):
And it was a lot, but and italso included fasting.
So before every time, uh, and Iknow I'm getting into this a
little out of order, but um, shesaid, this is what's gonna help
you not take in the toxins inall of your body as much.
So I ended up following what shedid and what she said to do.
(08:41):
And in the end, I cannot believeI can say I was never once
nauseous.
I lost my hair, but I did notever throw up, was never
nauseous through 12 weeks ofchemo.
So um the crunchy way sometimes,even if it was just in my head,
I don't care.
I was very happy to uh have donethat.
(09:02):
So, anyway, we get to the end,and then there's when when I'm
looking online at Facebookgroups and things, I'm realizing
that there's actually this flatand fabulous Facebook group.
And I'm like, what's this?
And it was women who had hadbreast cancer, and they ended up
deciding to stay flat.
(09:24):
And at the same time, literallya month after my diagnosis, this
woman, Catherine Guthrie, writesa book and publishes it called
Flat.
And it was about her cancerjourney and deciding to stay
flat, all of this.
And I just sort of saw it ashey, do I really want to go for
(09:44):
more surgery?
And and this is again, everyonethankfully gets a choice.
And finally, the medicalestablishment is actually
supporting women and coveringthe costs of these things.
But for me, I just went, Idon't, I don't want any more of
that.
Not no more of it.
And so somehow I also saw a pageon tattoos and I went, I am just
(10:05):
gonna get a kick-ass tattooinstead, and I'm not gonna worry
about it.
And so that's kind of the way itwent.
And then I, you know, startedlooking at different tattoo
artists, found the one.
He designed the tattoo for mybody, and I it's the most
audacious thing I've ever done.
(10:26):
And I will tell you, when I gotthe lines drawn, it took 12
total hours, and I never had atattoo.
And I thought, I've had fourkids, this will be no problem
whatsoever.
I was so wrong, and I don't, Imean, anyway, they he did the
lines.
I get in the car and I startsobbing.
This was the worst decision ofmy entire life.
(10:48):
And my husband is like, oh myGod.
But anyway, it was not, and inthe end, I am thrilled with the
result.
So I think that brings us kindof current on.
Well, that brings us sort of tothe end of that.
SPEAKER_02 (11:03):
All right.
Well, a few you said so manythings.
I mean, so many amazing things.
But for those of us watching,for those of you watching on
YouTube, you can see Kim'skick-ass tattoo, right?
Like she wears it proudly, whichI totally love.
And and love that you did that,right?
It's like, it's like your signof, you know, I had this and I
(11:25):
survived, and this is who I am,right?
Um, you know, some other thingsyou said.
I love that you wrote about it,right?
That was probably a greatrelease for you.
And I always feel that thatdoing some of those things helps
others, even if it just helpsone other person.
And the journey, like you evensaid that, like I've said that
continually.
(11:45):
Everybody's journey is theirown, right?
You talk about it being yourcrunchier route, but to me, it's
not your crunchier route, it'syour journey, it's the route you
took that worked for you, right?
Those kind of things.
I know Evie has something to sayin here.
Come on, I know you do.
Because it goes on so manyamazing things, right?
SPEAKER_01 (12:04):
Well, oh, the one thing I want to mention on the
tattoo is um it it became clearto me that if I was to like I
had a choice on what to do withbeing flat, right?
But then I had a choice oflooking at something every day
in the mirror that was notsomething I chose, and I decided
to put on top of that somethingI chose.
(12:26):
And that was, I don't know,there was just something too
that where I'm like, yeah, youwant to ask me about this?
Let me tell you.
And I'm still here, and I, youknow, it was it was very
empowering, I guess, to be theright word.
SPEAKER_00 (12:39):
Yeah.
And the design, when I see it,you know, it does, it looks like
there is a flowering going on,blooming, blossoming.
It's very dynamic, it looks veryalive, and it looks also very
organic and very natural, butthere is also this sort of like
otherworldly, you know, designelement to it.
And you and I remember seeing itfor the first time peeking out
(13:03):
of your outfit while we were ata very um professional event.
So we were, you know, this isthe first time we met, because
uh, you know, your background isvery serious.
And some of the things that I'veuh heard you talk about, you
know, I know that you too findyourself in a place of, you
know, like those medicalprofessionals who were helping
(13:25):
you coming in and helpingbusinesses like mine say, All
right, here's what's going onfrom a bookkeeping and
accounting standpoint.
Here are some things that uhmaybe will require that you
change your plan.
Or then here's some other thingsthat are okay, or let's do an
assessment.
So, like you're no strangers tothese kinds of conversations,
(13:45):
being the one who, you know,essentially runs the runs the
assessments and is really goodat making those, you know,
recommendations and saying,like, look, here's what I think
we should do.
So that was really interestingto see you and hear you speak
about it, being, you know, inthis vulnerable space and in
the, you know, I'm a recipientof service.
And I'm not trying to compareand contrast breast cancer and
(14:08):
bookkeeping questions, not atall.
But what I'm saying is, like,you know how to run the energy
of, I'm gonna be here the onewho provides the guidance and
the clarity and the help.
And here you are telling us astory where you know you were in
the seat of someone who neededto receive the support and the
help.
So that was one of the you knowbigger comments I wanted to make
(14:28):
that that's an interesting justjuxtaposition.
SPEAKER_01 (14:32):
Well, I don't know whether Teresa it had kind of
the same feeling, but when youget to the other side of it, if
you're that lucky, because thereare a lot of people who are not,
but this is one of those thingsin life that completely you can
either go back to the rat racethat you were in, or you can go
(14:52):
hold the fort.
What are you doing?
What are you doing with yourlife?
Is this really what you want todo?
And um, I would say that'sreally like the big pivot for me
in that I was such a peoplepleaser, and I still am to a
great degree, but I was sowrapped up in what do others
think and all this, and what'sthe right way?
(15:13):
Oh my gosh.
Um, it just is it's it'smaddening because then I was
like, stop, get like, do whatyou want to do.
And here I am, you know, justjoined a partnership last year
at the age of 58.
And it's like, we're having ablast.
Um, and we're making it verymuch our own.
So, you know, even as you said,uh, we don't walk in there and
(15:36):
kind of like, hello, we're hereto talk to you about your
accounting.
I'm kind of like, tell me, whatis your problem?
We're going to fix this.
We know how to use technology todo it.
I it's just, I don't know, itjust allows you to be free.
SPEAKER_02 (15:49):
Well, I I loved your comment about how you do.
It does make you kind ofrethink, right?
What's going on in your ownlife, right?
What what it absolutely did, youknow, in so many ways for me.
Um, you know, right after thathappened, my husband and I
started our charity foundation,and you know, so that we could
(16:10):
continue that good work.
So to me, that was important,right?
It was, it was kind of thatrevisiting.
But you also said, right, likeyou talked about the
naturopathic doctor, but youwere really open to some kind of
non-traditional things.
And I would even argue that yourchoice to not have
reconstruction is not thetraditional choice.
(16:30):
Most women worry about that,right?
Most women worry about howthey're viewed.
And I love that you took that adifferent direction.
SPEAKER_01 (16:40):
Thank you.
Um, yeah, it's funny because wealmost are called unicorns
because so few people willchoose to have only one side
that's flat.
SPEAKER_02 (16:49):
Uh there aren't many, but um well, and so many
women just don't no women reallychoose not to have
reconstruction at all.
Even if you have a double, theydon't choose that, right?
That's just not the traditionalway.
But for you, I and and you gotthis tattoo to to remind
everybody of you know, this isjust who I am.
(17:13):
This is the choice I madebecause that was what was best
for me on my journey.
SPEAKER_00 (17:19):
Yeah.
So that's the um that reminds meof um how, you know, that
retreat that you mentioned,Teresa.
So both both of you were at therest and receive um event, and I
invited you to really take thisinvitation seriously.
I invited you to take theinvitation seriously of okay,
(17:42):
rest and receive, one of thethings that distinguishes that
approach from other approachesis that if I say that this is
optional, it's a choice, I'mreally inviting you to tune into
does this program right now, theinvitation, does that really
speak to me?
And if I don't feel like doingwhat is on the program, I'm
going to actually spend timedoing what feels right.
(18:04):
So it's almost essentially thehomework there to just, you
know, relax and choose and dowhat you feel like doing.
And Kim, you stood out the wayyou took that to heart.
Seriously, and uh all the punsuh intended, and you essentially
built yourself a curriculum,moving through the experience,
(18:26):
not missing anything, definitelycontributing, definitely being
part of the circle, but reallywe watched you listen to your
body.
I need to rest now, I need tosleep now, I need to be by
myself now, now I need tosocialize, now I need to share
and you know, gather.
Can you say a few words aboutthat?
(18:46):
How this experience maybe youmentioned being a people pleaser
in the past, Rhett Race, youmentioned, you know, is there a
connection between what we werewitnessing at rest and receive
and all of the lessons thatyou've learned?
SPEAKER_01 (19:00):
Oh, yeah.
I and I will be perfectlyhonest, that was I was like, I
really want to do, I want to goout on a you know, around the
lake uh on a hike with onething.
And she said I could not do it.
So just do it, just do it.
I had to like talk myself intoit because it still was so like,
no, we're here.
(19:20):
She laid out the agenda.
Look, I'm supposed to do thesethings.
And um, and then when you whenyou said something about it in
in front of everybody, I'm like,oh my god, I'm in trouble.
Oh my god, like it still camein, but it was me finally going,
no, just go do what you want todo.
(19:41):
And you need to do more of that.
SPEAKER_00 (19:44):
And it's so funny.
But let's let's just pause herefor a second because the reason
I mentioned something, andhere's where the inflamed mind
goes like the inflamed mindsgoes, I'm in trouble.
I am bringing you up as anexample to other people saying,
please give yourself permission,follow this example, don't give
(20:04):
yourself up, right?
And still still it like youcould not be clearer.
I am mentioning this becauseit's actually a role model, and
you know, the programming willkick in and you get so hard on
yourself, you know, everyonedoes, right?
And be like, oh my gosh, I'mgetting highlighted, must be a
problem.
SPEAKER_01 (20:24):
But I also loved it that I mean, I was like, I think
she really means it.
I think she does.
So that you know, I was glad II'm really glad I was done it.
It was so small, but I swear Ihit on that in my life every
day.
Am I gonna do that or am I gonnado this?
And it all seems so silly,especially that's they call it
some people will call itliterally the gift of cancer.
(20:46):
And it is hyper focuses you onwhat is really important here.
And so that is the one thing Iwould say is that if people can
kind of embrace it for that andtake that away as opposed to
like there are a lot of peoplewho just pretend like nothing's
happening here.
I'm just I'm keeping going, andthat's great if it works for
(21:07):
you.
It just may end up having sometoll down the road and being
having more freedom might bereally, I don't know, it could
be great.
So it everybody's different.
SPEAKER_02 (21:18):
Well, we never want anybody to view ourselves to
view us in that way, right?
Like, you know, I'm anoverachiever as well, and I know
Kim is too, right?
Like we're overachiever, like,and oh my gosh, I'm have cancer
and I'm sick, and I gotta justkeep going because I don't want
anybody to view me that I'msick, right?
Like type thing.
So it's kind of that, it'salmost like a defense, right?
(21:41):
That that we're pushing backagainst it.
And I agree with you.
I think some of it's good,right?
Because it does keep us going.
You moving your son to collegehelped you kind of move past
because you can't just sit thereand dwell on it either.
But you also have to giveyourself some time time to allow
yourself, right, to grieve, to,you know, think about something
(22:02):
else, to rest, to whatever thatlooks like for you.
SPEAKER_01 (22:07):
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00 (22:10):
And I noticed, and that's why I think it's so I
noticed when you talked aboutthe, you know, the doctor who
was really clear with you.
Here's the plan, here's whatwe're gonna do, you know, and
you said that you could feel thedifference between them like,
you know, really basicallyhaving your back here as opposed
to bossing you around andtelling you what to do, removing
any choice.
So it's not about it, it itwasn't about the fact that they
(22:33):
weren't respectful of the factthat you might have a say in
this.
But what you were describing,and correct me if that's not um
correct, grounded confidence.
So it's like it felt like, okay,here's someone anchoring me into
this whole experience becausethe whole thing is so
overwhelming and big anddifficult.
(22:54):
And so to have someone be likethat, saying, like, here's what
we're gonna do, and remove thechoice really was not about you
know disrespecting your yourfree will or your will of or
your you know your health andwell-being as a as you know, you
being an active participant inthe decision-making process, but
really making it easier for you.
I love that, you know,distinction.
(23:15):
And it's almost like you'relearning how to do that for
yourself now on an ongoingbasis.
Like be the one who comes in andsays, okay, here's what we're
gonna do.
I'm gonna be the grounded, youknow, confidence, but at the
same time, open to change.
I love the prepare for the planto change idea.
I think that that is probablygonna be the title of the
episode, you know.
(23:37):
You gave us the motto, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (23:40):
Yeah, anything you'd say there about the so the other
weird thing that happened waswhen I had in 2018 is when I got
diagnosed.
And it was in like that yearthat I had brought on a team
member for the first time.
I had been working since 2010 bymyself on clients, and I had
(24:00):
more than I could handle.
And I just brought in someone.
And so suddenly I went, oh mygosh, what would I have done if
I hadn't have done that?
And I don't know, there wassomething about that whole
thing, I really wanted otherpeople involved with me.
And so the whole collaborationidea of what I have in my head
may not be the right thing allthe time, right?
(24:22):
So, how great to have people tobe able to talk with about.
And in this particular case witha surgeon, I I trust her.
She's she's and she told me whyshe wanted this.
She's like, you can do whateveryou want later, but right now,
this is all we're doing.
And I'm like, oh, thankgoodness.
So it really was, it wasfantastic.
unknown (24:43):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (24:44):
And sometimes you need that like force to tell
you, right?
Like, okay, this is what we needto do.
And and I think in your case,they didn't know, so they need
to figure out what was reallygoing on, but that's okay,
right?
Like that was the best route.
And, you know, I think everybodyneeds those when they're going
through something like breastcancer or anything that's, you
know, sometimes you need theguidance, right?
(25:06):
Like, I can tell you, I felt thesame way.
My breast cancer doctor wasvery, I mean, there were a lot
of pieces, and you know, a lotof plans changed as we found out
more things, right?
But she was always right there.
And my husband was was crazy,knew everything that was going
on because you also said yourbrain's just mush.
Like you have no idea, right?
(25:28):
Um, but it's it's it that partis the interesting part of the
journey.
And I've told people that I'vetalked to, right, that are
recently diagnosed, make sureyou have somebody you can count
on.
You should be taking somebodywith you to doctor's
appointments.
You should have a doctor you cancount on.
Because honestly, that time wascompletely a blur to me.
SPEAKER_01 (25:49):
Oh, yeah.
Um, to that point, I ended up atI told people because so many
people offered help.
And I finally said, Well, hereare things that I like.
Because honestly, that'soverwhelming when you've got all
what can I do?
And you're I don't know.
I have no idea.
Um, but then I told people, Iwould love to not have to drive
(26:10):
to chemo every week.
And I got a different personevery week that said, I will
drive you.
And they would come and theywould stay, and we'd get, you
know, get to chat.
It and like that was amazing.
SPEAKER_02 (26:22):
Yeah.
And I think it's people areafraid to ask for help.
But I actually really love, andand like I tend to be, I have
somebody who's going throughsome a friend who's going
through someone right now.
And I'm like, what do you needme to help you with?
Like, do you want me to comevisit?
Do you need me to go to thegrocery store?
Do you need me to do errands?
Do you need me to bring youfood?
Like, what is that?
And I know it's hard.
(26:42):
And she keeps saying no.
And that's okay, but I'm gonnakeep asking, right?
And I love that you asked forthat help.
It's it's hard to ask for help.
We don't want to be viewed asweak or whatever that looks
like.
So yeah, no, I I think it's a Ithink it's an amazing story.
SPEAKER_00 (27:00):
Yeah, I think getting specific is really cool.
You're speaking about, you know,Kim, when you started to get
specific about, okay, here, hereis what would actually make a
difference.
And getting really specific.
I think also it's really helpfulif we're in the support role
when we can start unlocking theother person and saying, okay,
how about this?
(27:21):
Uh here's some ideas I have, youpick.
And it doesn't have to be thetraditional, you know, meal
train, or it can't exactly bethe traditional meal train.
Like everything is welcome.
SPEAKER_02 (27:31):
Any changes is like driving to and from chemo and
having maybe somebody sit therewith you, or somebody different
to talk with, or whatever thatlooks like, right?
Like, like it, it it really is.
Like it's it's an amazing time.
And people want to help, right?
They wouldn't be asking if theydidn't want to.
So, you know, it's okay to sayyes, I would love to have you
(27:51):
help me with this or do this.
So um, yeah, great story.
Great story.
So can you just recap for uswhat you why this why this pivot
was your step forward?
I know you said it earlier, butwe always love to end on this
note.
SPEAKER_01 (28:07):
Um, I think that this allowed me to understand
what I was what I'm living underin terms of I I always am trying
to please everybody else.
And I will say I will get all mywork done before I do the thing
that I I want to do.
And I'm like, you may not havetime for that.
(28:29):
You actually need to focus onthat a lot more.
So I there was that along withwho says there's a career uh
actual career path, like whatand and the fact that I took 10
years off actually completelygave me, I wasn't sure what was
gonna happen.
And then suddenly I'm running af an accounting bookkeeping
firm.
(28:49):
It's like crazy.
But figuring out what you liketo do and figuring out like what
comes up in your life and beingopen to it.
I didn't have a plan, and yetsomehow I'm like with a great
partner, and I the whole thingis just kind of nutty, really.
So if you're I think maybe justbeing open to things and not
(29:09):
necessarily knowing you have theplan, but maybe that's what it's
going to be.
SPEAKER_02 (29:15):
Maybe that's the universe pushing you that way.
I mean, who who knows what thatlooks like, right?
Like for sure.
So awesome.
SPEAKER_00 (29:22):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I have a PS question for both ofyou.
You know, Kim, when you weresaying that you were telling us
the story about the tattoo, andthen you come back from the
first appointment and you get inthe car, and the big tears come.
And you're wondering, like, whathave I done?
What's happening here?
Do you feel like some of thatwas also, you know, here you
(29:44):
are, having just gone throughthis like a massive experience,
and a release is happening.
Do you feel like you know, theemotions around?
I mean, the whole experiencemust be so emotionally damaging.
Did you guys, both of you, findyourselves basically with some
of these experiences where,like, here I am, I'm crying over
(30:06):
something that may not be justabout that.
It may be about everything else.
SPEAKER_01 (30:10):
Cause I'm just, you know, expressing and cleansing
and I think it possibly, I thinkit almost certainly was, but I
will tell you, it was like threeand a half hours of him digging
in the black lines on me, and mybody was twitching.
And he he finally said, Hey, um,he had to stop.
And he's like, Listen, I've gotthis numbing cream I can use on
(30:33):
you, but you'd have to tell meif you're okay with it.
And I'm like, Oh, yeah.
And he says, Well, just so youknow, it's like from China and
it's not regulated.
And somebody came in and they'reuh anyway, the doctor used it
around his heart and he ended updying.
And I'm like, No, I'm all rightwith it.
Let's use it.
That anyway, but yes, I thinkthat yeah, it was kind of this
(30:57):
birth into the new, the new me.
I mean, I had a new buddy, butnow here it is.
I've chosen to do this, so yeah,there had to be something very
big about that.
SPEAKER_02 (31:06):
Yeah, and I can't really pinpoint for myself, but
I think there were a lot oflittle moments that I was like,
okay, like this, you know, I'mokay.
Like it's okay now.
I'm gonna, I can move forward,right?
I can do this.
I I think my biggest aha momentwas um when I was going to have
reconstruction and I was like, Ijust need to do it now.
(31:29):
Like I need to have it done.
And I really pushed the doctor.
And she's like, you know, it'slike mid-May, and she's like,
the earliest I would do it isearly June.
I was like, the earliest in Juneyou can get me in.
Like she's like, I'd really andI was like, no, I just I felt I
needed to have that done.
Like, I don't know, it was mytimetable and not hers.
And I was like, as long as it'ssafe for you to do it, I need to
(31:50):
have it.
Like, I just needed to be backto me, right?
Like and and I think that's partof it, right?
So yeah, it's a great, it's agreat question.
But you know, you just havethose.
I think everybody's again,everybody's moment, everybody's
journey is their own.
So, you know, that's where weend up for sure.
SPEAKER_00 (32:11):
Thank you.
Thank you both.
Thank you both for demoing, youknow, how these pivots have
indeed been a step forward foreach of you.
And I know, yeah, emphasizingthat it's a unique experience
and also, you know, the factthat it's universal and there's
so many women going through it,and it's also so relatable.
Anyone else going through anyhealth journey, your stories
(32:33):
really help and you know bringsome meaning and some, you know,
essentially audaciousness intothe whole thing, like you said,
Kim.
SPEAKER_01 (32:40):
You know, the last thing I would say is, and Teresa
had mentioned it before, like,how has it impacted you even
today?
I have been on a deep dive abouthealth.
I would have told you there wasno way that could happen to me.
And now that I have clued in tomore about, oh, these are the
things that can happen, likeeverything I'm reading about now
(33:01):
is about um like mitochondrialhealth and you know, insulin
insulin sensitivity and allthese things.
And so it has, I mean, it haschanged what I'm doing.
And I don't know if I if I hadnot had the whole cancer thing
happen, I think I would havekept thinking, oh no, I'm
invincible.
And and we're not.
And so the more you can do tokeep yourself from that, you
(33:24):
know, the better.
SPEAKER_02 (33:26):
Yeah.
No, what a great way to end.
Um, thank you so much, Kim, forbeing on today.
We really appreciate you sharingyour story with all of our
listeners.
Um, it is breast cancerawareness month.
So we always love to hear thesestories, these amazing stories.
We all have journeys, we allhave to move forward with them.
(33:46):
So thank you again so much.
SPEAKER_01 (33:49):
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate it.
It was it was very fun.
It's fun.
SPEAKER_02 (33:55):
Evie, do you want to close this out today?
SPEAKER_00 (33:58):
Well, thank you both, and thank you to all of
our listeners.
We will catch you on anotherepisode really soon.
And in the meantime, if you havea pivot, step into it
audaciously.
Hello, everybody, and welcome to another episode
of Step Into the Pivot.
And this is a special episode.
We are continuing our workaround October Breast Cancer
Awareness Month.
And uh this is the month wherewe uplift and celebrate women
who have had personal directexperience with breast cancer.
(00:26):
And um, this is the month wherewe then showcase some of the
stories.
We're so grateful to have aguest today who is willing to
tell her story, Kim Kelleher.
Kim, welcome to the show.
SPEAKER_01 (00:38):
Thank you for having me.
I mean, I kind of wish I didn'thave to be on this one.
Wouldn't we all that have hadthat?
But um I really appreciate youletting me talk about my story.
SPEAKER_00 (00:50):
Yes, and I will let Teresa introduce you more.
I know that the two of you alsoprepped for this call, quote
unquote, and by prep, I mean youhad deeper conversations because
as um our listeners who've beenfollowing us know, Teresa, you
too personally have had theexperience with breast cancer.
And this is one of the reasonswhy we started doing this show,
because this was, you know, youroriginal big pivot that you
(01:12):
wanted to talk about.
So I'll let you furtherintroduce Kim.
I do have to say for everybodywho is listening to us on audio,
if you check out our YouTubechannel and you see the two
women I'm speaking to today,they both are so vibrant and
full of health and vitality.
And that is one of the you knowbig messages that we're bringing
through today.
You know, how do you stayhealthy and um and thriving in
(01:34):
the face of big stuff like theC-Words?
So, Teresa, please take it away.
For sure.
SPEAKER_02 (01:40):
So yeah, uh, as Evie said, you know, Kim and I
actually got to meet uh lastyear at a retreat, um, and we
had an amazing connection, youknow, and it's it's not just the
breast cancer that connects you,although you do, because what
you learn is you're not alone,right?
And I think to me, that's alwaysthe biggest message.
(02:01):
And I really um enjoyed theopportunity to talk to her there
and that she was willing to comeon because telling the story is
not always easy, right?
It's not always where you're at.
And even though you're at a goodplace now, it's always something
to think about, right?
And and I think Kim, we're gonnatalk about that a little bit.
So, like Evie said, thank you somuch for being on.
We really do appreciate it.
(02:21):
And I'm gonna jump right in.
Tell us a little about yourstory, tell us the background of
your story, how you discoveredit, you know, and and a little
bit about that.
SPEAKER_01 (02:34):
Okay, so um if you just sort of start with the fact
that I had been told for yearsduring exams, because I went
every year, I was good, I didall that, but um, I was told I
have fibrocystic breast tissue,which, you know, apparently was
pretty common.
So every time I heard that, Ikind of was like, Yeah, yeah,
(02:55):
I'm fine.
And then uh there was a time inthe early 2000s once I had had
kids where a mammogram showedsomething that they said, you
know, we want to do a what theycall a core biopsy.
I'm like, okay.
So went and did that and endedup finding out there was nothing
(03:15):
that they thought was uh, youknow, really suspicious.
So then you get to the annualmammogram in 2018, and that
showed like suspicious kind offlakes across the way they
described it, and they wanted todo a core biopsy biopsy.
So I literally took theradiologist aside and I said,
listen, I've been through thisbefore.
(03:36):
Uh, I'm sure it is nothing.
They've already done this.
And he's like, Oh, I wanted me.
He was so nice given what I wasdoing.
But um he said, No, we reallywant to do it.
So I had it, and then uh it wasmy birthday.
It was like I had my birthday onthe 13th of August, and it was
on the 14th that I got a phonecall from Kaiser, and someone
(03:56):
said, Hi, I'm calling from asthe nurse, you know, from
whatever the breast cancerplace, and I need to tell you
you have IDC and went on.
And I was like, Hold on, arethis is Kim Kelleher?
Have you actually called theright person?
Like I was so convinced allalong this is nothing that when
(04:17):
she said it and I realized thatit was actually true, I mean,
I'm actually like getting alittle goosebumps because it's
like it is this most shockingthing that has ever happened to
me.
And um, anyway, I like that'sanother time for the day.
What I I mean, I had to driveimmediately to my husband's
office, which was close enough,and close the door and just
(04:39):
immediately burst into tears.
And was and then we told thewhole family immediately.
So, this is one of the things Iwill also mention is that I am a
person who needs to talk aboutstuff.
And I was completely open witheveryone.
I posted on Facebook, I starteda caring bridge blog, I wrote a
ton for anybody that wanted toknow.
(05:01):
And that's not going to be foreverybody.
So the good news is people canhave different ways of dealing
with this, but I did that.
So um anyway, they thought thatI had a five centimeter tumor,
which my brain at this point isnow completely not able to
think, not able to processinformation.
(05:23):
And so they were like, we thinkit's five centimeters.
My kids are like, Mom, that'slike two and a half inches.
So they thought it could beeverywhere.
So I'm about to take my son tocollege for the first time on
the East Coast, and they said,We got to get in a PET scan
before you go.
So we do the PET scan, and I amit was actually this great thing
(05:44):
to take him because I had tofocus on something else, because
otherwise the hours that go byare interminable.
So I take him, and it was whileI was there that I got a phone
call, and they said, Guess what?
The great news is nothing lit upthroughout the rest of your
body.
And I'm like, thank goodness.
And they said, but what's weirdis nothing lit up in your breast
(06:07):
either.
And now no one knows what'shappening.
And now I'm like, did they getthis wrong?
And anyway, so they said, Well,the the plan had been I'm you're
gonna have chemo to shrink thistumor, then we're gonna do
surgery and yada, yada.
And I met with enough peoplethat someone told me prepare for
the plan to change.
(06:28):
And that was the best advice Igot because literally things
changed all the time.
Okay, so then they said themedical oncologist goes, You
can't tell me what size, what'sgoing on here.
I'm not treating her.
So suddenly the plan flips,you're gonna have surgery.
We don't know what we're gonnafind.
And the surgeon is like, We aredoing a single mastectomy, there
(06:50):
is no reconstruction at thistime.
If you want any of that, we willtake care of that later.
Even if you want to double rightnow, we are not going to do it.
And that was like a gift becauseI didn't have to make any
choices looking back.
And I think about people who arelike, Oh, what do you want to
do?
And I I was just lucky to beleft out of that.
So, so I knew going in, gonnacome out of this flat, and we'll
(07:13):
figure out what's going on.
Anyway, the end result was therewas stuff all through ducts,
cancerous cells, but it onlycome out in two little spots.
And so they're like, Oh, this isgreat.
But in the three lymph nodesthat they took, one of them had
isolated tumor cells, whichmeans that you can actually,
according to all the statistics,ignore it, but they're like, we
(07:35):
don't want to ignore it.
So would you be willing to dochemo?
And I'm like, I am willing to dowhatever I can to not be in this
position again.
So I say, yep, we'll do it.
So um that is we go intosurgery.
I have surgery that actuallywent just fine, was great.
And then you start getting readyfor uh chemo.
(07:58):
And that's when I was like, um,I cannot believe I'm facing
this.
And I ended up finding out thatthere was a naturopathic doctor
focusing on oncology here inPortland, Rose Paisley is her
name.
And I met with her and shehelped me put together this plan
of listen, here are all thesesupplements, here's what they
do, this is why you're takingit.
(08:20):
And it was a lot, but and italso included fasting.
So before every time, uh, and Iknow I'm getting into this a
little out of order, but um, shesaid, this is what's gonna help
you not take in the toxins inall of your body as much.
So I ended up following what shedid and what she said to do.
(08:41):
And in the end, I cannot believeI can say I was never once
nauseous.
I lost my hair, but I did notever throw up, was never
nauseous through 12 weeks ofchemo.
So um the crunchy way sometimes,even if it was just in my head,
I don't care.
I was very happy to uh have donethat.
(09:02):
So, anyway, we get to the end,and then there's when when I'm
looking online at Facebookgroups and things, I'm realizing
that there's actually this flatand fabulous Facebook group.
And I'm like, what's this?
And it was women who had hadbreast cancer, and they ended up
deciding to stay flat.
(09:24):
And at the same time, literallya month after my diagnosis, this
woman, Catherine Guthrie, writesa book and publishes it called
Flat.
And it was about her cancerjourney and deciding to stay
flat, all of this.
And I just sort of saw it ashey, do I really want to go for
(09:44):
more surgery?
And and this is again, everyonethankfully gets a choice.
And finally, the medicalestablishment is actually
supporting women and coveringthe costs of these things.
But for me, I just went, Idon't, I don't want any more of
that.
Not no more of it.
And so somehow I also saw a pageon tattoos and I went, I am just
(10:05):
gonna get a kick-ass tattooinstead, and I'm not gonna worry
about it.
And so that's kind of the way itwent.
And then I, you know, startedlooking at different tattoo
artists, found the one.
He designed the tattoo for mybody, and I it's the most
audacious thing I've ever done.
(10:26):
And I will tell you, when I gotthe lines drawn, it took 12
total hours, and I never had atattoo.
And I thought, I've had fourkids, this will be no problem
whatsoever.
I was so wrong, and I don't, Imean, anyway, they he did the
lines.
I get in the car and I startsobbing.
This was the worst decision ofmy entire life.
(10:48):
And my husband is like, oh myGod.
But anyway, it was not, and inthe end, I am thrilled with the
result.
So I think that brings us kindof current on.
Well, that brings us sort of tothe end of that.
SPEAKER_02 (11:03):
All right.
Well, a few you said so manythings.
I mean, so many amazing things.
But for those of us watching,for those of you watching on
YouTube, you can see Kim'skick-ass tattoo, right?
Like she wears it proudly, whichI totally love.
And and love that you did that,right?
It's like, it's like your signof, you know, I had this and I
(11:25):
survived, and this is who I am,right?
Um, you know, some other thingsyou said.
I love that you wrote about it,right?
That was probably a greatrelease for you.
And I always feel that thatdoing some of those things helps
others, even if it just helpsone other person.
And the journey, like you evensaid that, like I've said that
continually.
(11:45):
Everybody's journey is theirown, right?
You talk about it being yourcrunchier route, but to me, it's
not your crunchier route, it'syour journey, it's the route you
took that worked for you, right?
Those kind of things.
I know Evie has something to sayin here.
Come on, I know you do.
Because it goes on so manyamazing things, right?
SPEAKER_01 (12:04):
Well, oh, the one thing I want to mention on the
tattoo is um it it became clearto me that if I was to like I
had a choice on what to do withbeing flat, right?
But then I had a choice oflooking at something every day
in the mirror that was notsomething I chose, and I decided
to put on top of that somethingI chose.
(12:26):
And that was, I don't know,there was just something too
that where I'm like, yeah, youwant to ask me about this?
Let me tell you.
And I'm still here, and I, youknow, it was it was very
empowering, I guess, to be theright word.
SPEAKER_00 (12:39):
Yeah.
And the design, when I see it,you know, it does, it looks like
there is a flowering going on,blooming, blossoming.
It's very dynamic, it looks veryalive, and it looks also very
organic and very natural, butthere is also this sort of like
otherworldly, you know, designelement to it.
And you and I remember seeing itfor the first time peeking out
(13:03):
of your outfit while we were ata very um professional event.
So we were, you know, this isthe first time we met, because
uh, you know, your background isvery serious.
And some of the things that I'veuh heard you talk about, you
know, I know that you too findyourself in a place of, you
know, like those medicalprofessionals who were helping
(13:25):
you coming in and helpingbusinesses like mine say, All
right, here's what's going onfrom a bookkeeping and
accounting standpoint.
Here are some things that uhmaybe will require that you
change your plan.
Or then here's some other thingsthat are okay, or let's do an
assessment.
So, like you're no strangers tothese kinds of conversations,
(13:45):
being the one who, you know,essentially runs the runs the
assessments and is really goodat making those, you know,
recommendations and saying,like, look, here's what I think
we should do.
So that was really interestingto see you and hear you speak
about it, being, you know, inthis vulnerable space and in
the, you know, I'm a recipientof service.
And I'm not trying to compareand contrast breast cancer and
(14:08):
bookkeeping questions, not atall.
But what I'm saying is, like,you know how to run the energy
of, I'm gonna be here the onewho provides the guidance and
the clarity and the help.
And here you are telling us astory where you know you were in
the seat of someone who neededto receive the support and the
help.
So that was one of the you knowbigger comments I wanted to make
(14:28):
that that's an interesting justjuxtaposition.
SPEAKER_01 (14:32):
Well, I don't know whether Teresa it had kind of
the same feeling, but when youget to the other side of it, if
you're that lucky, because thereare a lot of people who are not,
but this is one of those thingsin life that completely you can
either go back to the rat racethat you were in, or you can go
(14:52):
hold the fort.
What are you doing?
What are you doing with yourlife?
Is this really what you want todo?
And um, I would say that'sreally like the big pivot for me
in that I was such a peoplepleaser, and I still am to a
great degree, but I was sowrapped up in what do others
think and all this, and what'sthe right way?
(15:13):
Oh my gosh.
Um, it just is it's it'smaddening because then I was
like, stop, get like, do whatyou want to do.
And here I am, you know, justjoined a partnership last year
at the age of 58.
And it's like, we're having ablast.
Um, and we're making it verymuch our own.
So, you know, even as you said,uh, we don't walk in there and
(15:36):
kind of like, hello, we're hereto talk to you about your
accounting.
I'm kind of like, tell me, whatis your problem?
We're going to fix this.
We know how to use technology todo it.
I it's just, I don't know, itjust allows you to be free.
SPEAKER_02 (15:49):
Well, I I loved your comment about how you do.
It does make you kind ofrethink, right?
What's going on in your ownlife, right?
What what it absolutely did, youknow, in so many ways for me.
Um, you know, right after thathappened, my husband and I
started our charity foundation,and you know, so that we could
(16:10):
continue that good work.
So to me, that was important,right?
It was, it was kind of thatrevisiting.
But you also said, right, likeyou talked about the
naturopathic doctor, but youwere really open to some kind of
non-traditional things.
And I would even argue that yourchoice to not have
reconstruction is not thetraditional choice.
(16:30):
Most women worry about that,right?
Most women worry about howthey're viewed.
And I love that you took that adifferent direction.
SPEAKER_01 (16:40):
Thank you.
Um, yeah, it's funny because wealmost are called unicorns
because so few people willchoose to have only one side
that's flat.
SPEAKER_02 (16:49):
Uh there aren't many, but um well, and so many
women just don't no women reallychoose not to have
reconstruction at all.
Even if you have a double, theydon't choose that, right?
That's just not the traditionalway.
But for you, I and and you gotthis tattoo to to remind
everybody of you know, this isjust who I am.
(17:13):
This is the choice I madebecause that was what was best
for me on my journey.
SPEAKER_00 (17:19):
Yeah.
So that's the um that reminds meof um how, you know, that
retreat that you mentioned,Teresa.
So both both of you were at therest and receive um event, and I
invited you to really take thisinvitation seriously.
I invited you to take theinvitation seriously of okay,
(17:42):
rest and receive, one of thethings that distinguishes that
approach from other approachesis that if I say that this is
optional, it's a choice, I'mreally inviting you to tune into
does this program right now, theinvitation, does that really
speak to me?
And if I don't feel like doingwhat is on the program, I'm
going to actually spend timedoing what feels right.
(18:04):
So it's almost essentially thehomework there to just, you
know, relax and choose and dowhat you feel like doing.
And Kim, you stood out the wayyou took that to heart.
Seriously, and uh all the punsuh intended, and you essentially
built yourself a curriculum,moving through the experience,
(18:26):
not missing anything, definitelycontributing, definitely being
part of the circle, but reallywe watched you listen to your
body.
I need to rest now, I need tosleep now, I need to be by
myself now, now I need tosocialize, now I need to share
and you know, gather.
Can you say a few words aboutthat?
(18:46):
How this experience maybe youmentioned being a people pleaser
in the past, Rhett Race, youmentioned, you know, is there a
connection between what we werewitnessing at rest and receive
and all of the lessons thatyou've learned?
SPEAKER_01 (19:00):
Oh, yeah.
I and I will be perfectlyhonest, that was I was like, I
really want to do, I want to goout on a you know, around the
lake uh on a hike with onething.
And she said I could not do it.
So just do it, just do it.
I had to like talk myself intoit because it still was so like,
no, we're here.
(19:20):
She laid out the agenda.
Look, I'm supposed to do thesethings.
And um, and then when you whenyou said something about it in
in front of everybody, I'm like,oh my god, I'm in trouble.
Oh my god, like it still camein, but it was me finally going,
no, just go do what you want todo.
(19:41):
And you need to do more of that.
SPEAKER_00 (19:44):
And it's so funny.
But let's let's just pause herefor a second because the reason
I mentioned something, andhere's where the inflamed mind
goes like the inflamed mindsgoes, I'm in trouble.
I am bringing you up as anexample to other people saying,
please give yourself permission,follow this example, don't give
(20:04):
yourself up, right?
And still still it like youcould not be clearer.
I am mentioning this becauseit's actually a role model, and
you know, the programming willkick in and you get so hard on
yourself, you know, everyonedoes, right?
And be like, oh my gosh, I'mgetting highlighted, must be a
problem.
SPEAKER_01 (20:24):
But I also loved it that I mean, I was like, I think
she really means it.
I think she does.
So that you know, I was glad II'm really glad I was done it.
It was so small, but I swear Ihit on that in my life every
day.
Am I gonna do that or am I gonnado this?
And it all seems so silly,especially that's they call it
some people will call itliterally the gift of cancer.
(20:46):
And it is hyper focuses you onwhat is really important here.
And so that is the one thing Iwould say is that if people can
kind of embrace it for that andtake that away as opposed to
like there are a lot of peoplewho just pretend like nothing's
happening here.
I'm just I'm keeping going, andthat's great if it works for
(21:07):
you.
It just may end up having sometoll down the road and being
having more freedom might bereally, I don't know, it could
be great.
So it everybody's different.
SPEAKER_02 (21:18):
Well, we never want anybody to view ourselves to
view us in that way, right?
Like, you know, I'm anoverachiever as well, and I know
Kim is too, right?
Like we're overachiever, like,and oh my gosh, I'm have cancer
and I'm sick, and I gotta justkeep going because I don't want
anybody to view me that I'msick, right?
Like type thing.
So it's kind of that, it'salmost like a defense, right?
(21:41):
That that we're pushing backagainst it.
And I agree with you.
I think some of it's good,right?
Because it does keep us going.
You moving your son to collegehelped you kind of move past
because you can't just sit thereand dwell on it either.
But you also have to giveyourself some time time to allow
yourself, right, to grieve, to,you know, think about something
(22:02):
else, to rest, to whatever thatlooks like for you.
SPEAKER_01 (22:07):
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_00 (22:10):
And I noticed, and that's why I think it's so I
noticed when you talked aboutthe, you know, the doctor who
was really clear with you.
Here's the plan, here's whatwe're gonna do, you know, and
you said that you could feel thedifference between them like,
you know, really basicallyhaving your back here as opposed
to bossing you around andtelling you what to do, removing
any choice.
So it's not about it, it itwasn't about the fact that they
(22:33):
weren't respectful of the factthat you might have a say in
this.
But what you were describing,and correct me if that's not um
correct, grounded confidence.
So it's like it felt like, okay,here's someone anchoring me into
this whole experience becausethe whole thing is so
overwhelming and big anddifficult.
(22:54):
And so to have someone be likethat, saying, like, here's what
we're gonna do, and remove thechoice really was not about you
know disrespecting your yourfree will or your will of or
your you know your health andwell-being as a as you know, you
being an active participant inthe decision-making process, but
really making it easier for you.
I love that, you know,distinction.
(23:15):
And it's almost like you'relearning how to do that for
yourself now on an ongoingbasis.
Like be the one who comes in andsays, okay, here's what we're
gonna do.
I'm gonna be the grounded, youknow, confidence, but at the
same time, open to change.
I love the prepare for the planto change idea.
I think that that is probablygonna be the title of the
episode, you know.
(23:37):
You gave us the motto, you know.
SPEAKER_01 (23:40):
Yeah, anything you'd say there about the so the other
weird thing that happened waswhen I had in 2018 is when I got
diagnosed.
And it was in like that yearthat I had brought on a team
member for the first time.
I had been working since 2010 bymyself on clients, and I had
(24:00):
more than I could handle.
And I just brought in someone.
And so suddenly I went, oh mygosh, what would I have done if
I hadn't have done that?
And I don't know, there wassomething about that whole
thing, I really wanted otherpeople involved with me.
And so the whole collaborationidea of what I have in my head
may not be the right thing allthe time, right?
(24:22):
So, how great to have people tobe able to talk with about.
And in this particular case witha surgeon, I I trust her.
She's she's and she told me whyshe wanted this.
She's like, you can do whateveryou want later, but right now,
this is all we're doing.
And I'm like, oh, thankgoodness.
So it really was, it wasfantastic.
unknown (24:43):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (24:44):
And sometimes you need that like force to tell
you, right?
Like, okay, this is what we needto do.
And and I think in your case,they didn't know, so they need
to figure out what was reallygoing on, but that's okay,
right?
Like that was the best route.
And, you know, I think everybodyneeds those when they're going
through something like breastcancer or anything that's, you
know, sometimes you need theguidance, right?
(25:06):
Like, I can tell you, I felt thesame way.
My breast cancer doctor wasvery, I mean, there were a lot
of pieces, and you know, a lotof plans changed as we found out
more things, right?
But she was always right there.
And my husband was was crazy,knew everything that was going
on because you also said yourbrain's just mush.
Like you have no idea, right?
(25:28):
Um, but it's it's it that partis the interesting part of the
journey.
And I've told people that I'vetalked to, right, that are
recently diagnosed, make sureyou have somebody you can count
on.
You should be taking somebodywith you to doctor's
appointments.
You should have a doctor you cancount on.
Because honestly, that time wascompletely a blur to me.
SPEAKER_01 (25:49):
Oh, yeah.
Um, to that point, I ended up atI told people because so many
people offered help.
And I finally said, Well, hereare things that I like.
Because honestly, that'soverwhelming when you've got all
what can I do?
And you're I don't know.
I have no idea.
Um, but then I told people, Iwould love to not have to drive
(26:10):
to chemo every week.
And I got a different personevery week that said, I will
drive you.
And they would come and theywould stay, and we'd get, you
know, get to chat.
It and like that was amazing.
SPEAKER_02 (26:22):
Yeah.
And I think it's people areafraid to ask for help.
But I actually really love, andand like I tend to be, I have
somebody who's going throughsome a friend who's going
through someone right now.
And I'm like, what do you needme to help you with?
Like, do you want me to comevisit?
Do you need me to go to thegrocery store?
Do you need me to do errands?
Do you need me to bring youfood?
Like, what is that?
And I know it's hard.
(26:42):
And she keeps saying no.
And that's okay, but I'm gonnakeep asking, right?
And I love that you asked forthat help.
It's it's hard to ask for help.
We don't want to be viewed asweak or whatever that looks
like.
So yeah, no, I I think it's a Ithink it's an amazing story.
SPEAKER_00 (27:00):
Yeah, I think getting specific is really cool.
You're speaking about, you know,Kim, when you started to get
specific about, okay, here, hereis what would actually make a
difference.
And getting really specific.
I think also it's really helpfulif we're in the support role
when we can start unlocking theother person and saying, okay,
how about this?
(27:21):
Uh here's some ideas I have, youpick.
And it doesn't have to be thetraditional, you know, meal
train, or it can't exactly bethe traditional meal train.
Like everything is welcome.
SPEAKER_02 (27:31):
Any changes is like driving to and from chemo and
having maybe somebody sit therewith you, or somebody different
to talk with, or whatever thatlooks like, right?
Like, like it, it it really is.
Like it's it's an amazing time.
And people want to help, right?
They wouldn't be asking if theydidn't want to.
So, you know, it's okay to sayyes, I would love to have you
(27:51):
help me with this or do this.
So um, yeah, great story.
Great story.
So can you just recap for uswhat you why this why this pivot
was your step forward?
I know you said it earlier, butwe always love to end on this
note.
SPEAKER_01 (28:07):
Um, I think that this allowed me to understand
what I was what I'm living underin terms of I I always am trying
to please everybody else.
And I will say I will get all mywork done before I do the thing
that I I want to do.
And I'm like, you may not havetime for that.
(28:29):
You actually need to focus onthat a lot more.
So I there was that along withwho says there's a career uh
actual career path, like whatand and the fact that I took 10
years off actually completelygave me, I wasn't sure what was
gonna happen.
And then suddenly I'm running af an accounting bookkeeping
firm.
(28:49):
It's like crazy.
But figuring out what you liketo do and figuring out like what
comes up in your life and beingopen to it.
I didn't have a plan, and yetsomehow I'm like with a great
partner, and I the whole thingis just kind of nutty, really.
So if you're I think maybe justbeing open to things and not
(29:09):
necessarily knowing you have theplan, but maybe that's what it's
going to be.
SPEAKER_02 (29:15):
Maybe that's the universe pushing you that way.
I mean, who who knows what thatlooks like, right?
Like for sure.
So awesome.
SPEAKER_00 (29:22):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I have a PS question for both ofyou.
You know, Kim, when you weresaying that you were telling us
the story about the tattoo, andthen you come back from the
first appointment and you get inthe car, and the big tears come.
And you're wondering, like, whathave I done?
What's happening here?
Do you feel like some of thatwas also, you know, here you
(29:44):
are, having just gone throughthis like a massive experience,
and a release is happening.
Do you feel like you know, theemotions around?
I mean, the whole experiencemust be so emotionally damaging.
Did you guys, both of you, findyourselves basically with some
of these experiences where,like, here I am, I'm crying over
(30:06):
something that may not be justabout that.
It may be about everything else.
SPEAKER_01 (30:10):
Cause I'm just, you know, expressing and cleansing
and I think it possibly, I thinkit almost certainly was, but I
will tell you, it was like threeand a half hours of him digging
in the black lines on me, and mybody was twitching.
And he he finally said, Hey, um,he had to stop.
And he's like, Listen, I've gotthis numbing cream I can use on
(30:33):
you, but you'd have to tell meif you're okay with it.
And I'm like, Oh, yeah.
And he says, Well, just so youknow, it's like from China and
it's not regulated.
And somebody came in and they'reuh anyway, the doctor used it
around his heart and he ended updying.
And I'm like, No, I'm all rightwith it.
Let's use it.
That anyway, but yes, I thinkthat yeah, it was kind of this
(30:57):
birth into the new, the new me.
I mean, I had a new buddy, butnow here it is.
I've chosen to do this, so yeah,there had to be something very
big about that.
SPEAKER_02 (31:06):
Yeah, and I can't really pinpoint for myself, but
I think there were a lot oflittle moments that I was like,
okay, like this, you know, I'mokay.
Like it's okay now.
I'm gonna, I can move forward,right?
I can do this.
I I think my biggest aha momentwas um when I was going to have
reconstruction and I was like, Ijust need to do it now.
(31:29):
Like I need to have it done.
And I really pushed the doctor.
And she's like, you know, it'slike mid-May, and she's like,
the earliest I would do it isearly June.
I was like, the earliest in Juneyou can get me in.
Like she's like, I'd really andI was like, no, I just I felt I
needed to have that done.
Like, I don't know, it was mytimetable and not hers.
And I was like, as long as it'ssafe for you to do it, I need to
(31:50):
have it.
Like, I just needed to be backto me, right?
Like and and I think that's partof it, right?
So yeah, it's a great, it's agreat question.
But you know, you just havethose.
I think everybody's again,everybody's moment, everybody's
journey is their own.
So, you know, that's where weend up for sure.
SPEAKER_00 (32:11):
Thank you.
Thank you both.
Thank you both for demoing, youknow, how these pivots have
indeed been a step forward foreach of you.
And I know, yeah, emphasizingthat it's a unique experience
and also, you know, the factthat it's universal and there's
so many women going through it,and it's also so relatable.
Anyone else going through anyhealth journey, your stories
(32:33):
really help and you know bringsome meaning and some, you know,
essentially audaciousness intothe whole thing, like you said,
Kim.
SPEAKER_01 (32:40):
You know, the last thing I would say is, and Teresa
had mentioned it before, like,how has it impacted you even
today?
I have been on a deep dive abouthealth.
I would have told you there wasno way that could happen to me.
And now that I have clued in tomore about, oh, these are the
things that can happen, likeeverything I'm reading about now
(33:01):
is about um like mitochondrialhealth and you know, insulin
insulin sensitivity and allthese things.
And so it has, I mean, it haschanged what I'm doing.
And I don't know if I if I hadnot had the whole cancer thing
happen, I think I would havekept thinking, oh no, I'm
invincible.
And and we're not.
And so the more you can do tokeep yourself from that, you
(33:24):
know, the better.
SPEAKER_02 (33:26):
Yeah.
No, what a great way to end.
Um, thank you so much, Kim, forbeing on today.
We really appreciate you sharingyour story with all of our
listeners.
Um, it is breast cancerawareness month.
So we always love to hear thesestories, these amazing stories.
We all have journeys, we allhave to move forward with them.
(33:46):
So thank you again so much.
SPEAKER_01 (33:49):
Thank you for having me.
I really appreciate it.
It was it was very fun.
It's fun.
SPEAKER_02 (33:55):
Evie, do you want to close this out today?
SPEAKER_00 (33:58):
Well, thank you both, and thank you to all of
our listeners.
We will catch you on anotherepisode really soon.
And in the meantime, if you havea pivot, step into it
audaciously.
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