July 9, 2025 • 9 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 0 (00:00):
Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help
you make stopping drinking asimple, logical and easy
decision.
We help you with tips, toolsand strategies to start living
your best life when alcohol-free.
If you want to learn more aboutstop drinking coaching, then
head over to wwwsoberclearcom.
(00:21):
I struggled with alcohol foralmost 10 years and alcohol was
by far the biggest source ofpain that I had in my life.
It was responsible for everybad decision I ever made.
Okay, ultimately I made thedecision, but alcohol was always
linked to it in some way.
Whether it was an argumentsaying the wrong thing to the
wrong person, a stupid financialdecision pretty much every bad
(00:43):
thing that happened in my lifewas linked to alcohol in some
way.
I tried stopping drinking withAA.
With willpower, I dropped to myknees in church and just begged
God to help me, but nothingworked.
Seven years ago everythingchanged.
I changed the way that I viewedalcohol and my life looks
totally different.
But today I'm going to unpackfour things that nobody is going
to tell you about stoppingdrinking.
(01:03):
And I say nobody because whenyou try and stop drinking
alcohol, you're going to get somany mixed messages.
One friend is going to say well, why don't you just cut down,
like me, you might go to thedoctor and they might say well,
you should drink the recommendeddaily allowance.
You go and read the alcoholbottle and it just tells you to
drink responsibly.
See, the things that I'm goingto tell you are kind of what you
need to hear but probably don'twant to hear.
(01:25):
So this video might make you alittle bit uncomfortable, and
that's okay If you haven't metyet.
My name is Leon Sylvester.
I'm the founder ofSoberClearcom and if you
actually want to access a freevideo training that shows you
how to control your drinking inas little as 24 hours, you can
click the link in thedescription, put in your name
and email address and then a newvideo will start playing that's
going to show you a new,scientifically validated
(01:46):
approach to getting in controlof your drinking quickly.
So just click the link downbelow, put your name and email
address in and definitely checkthat one out.
But now let's unpack things.
So number one and this won'tmake sense until I fully unpack
it but if you stop drinkingalcohol or you want to stop
drinking alcohol and let's sayyou've got a friend that stopped
, you might have a friend thatjust decided one day.
(02:06):
Do you know what I'm notdrinking?
And that friend of yours.
They could be a few monthssober, a few years sober, and
for them it was just like I'mjust going to not drink, and
that was it.
They didn't drink.
I've got people like this in mylife and all they did was use
their human will to stopdrinking.
Now, does this exist?
Of course it does.
There are people out there thatuse willpower to stop drinking
all of the time.
I have used willpower hundredsof times and it's fine.
(02:27):
You can use willpower to notdrink alcohol, but what people
aren't going to tell you is thatit rarely works long term.
See, when we use willpower tonot drink, what we're doing is
we're resisting the urge todrink, because that's what we're
doing.
We're exerting our will and ourpersonal strength against a
craving or a thought of drinking.
But making a decision to notdrink should not have anything
(02:48):
to do with willpower.
Think about it like this let'ssay you drink a lot of water,
but let's say you always addlemon and lime into your water.
If, all of a sudden, I said doyou know what?
No more lemon and lime in yourwater, are you going to need to
use willpower to just drinkplain water.
Are you going to need to fightthe urge to squeeze the lemon
and lime into your drink?
No, you're just going to befine, like it's just whatever.
See, the whole idea of usingwillpower to not drink alcohol
(03:10):
is a fallacy.
Think about it.
If you need to fight the urgeto not drink, you still see
alcohol as a good thing, assomething that enhances your
life in some way, which is whywillpower never works long-term.
It can work.
I am not saying that therearen't people out there that
stop drinking with willpowerI've done it and there are
people out there that don'tdrink for years, sometimes
decades, with just willpower.
(03:31):
So there are people out therethat do do this.
But listen, I don't want you totake this the wrong way, but if
willpower really worked, thenwe'd probably stop drinking in
our teenage years when we getthat first hangover and we're
like, oh, I feel terrible, I'mnever drinking again.
Do you remember when you toldyourself that?
Because I've told myself thatso many damn times, never again,
never again, never again.
Fight the urge back to the drink.
What you need to do is changethe way that you view alcohol.
(03:54):
Make one decision that's itAgain.
That's what I help people do inmy coaching program in my
company.
If you want more details onthat, just go to SoberClearcom
or click the link down below.
But I'm telling you you do notneed willpower to not drink
alcohol.
You need to see it for what itis, in a purely logical way,
because all it is is ethanol,right, poison.
You need to see it this waymake one decision and move on
(04:15):
with your life, and that is notsomething you're going to hear
anywhere else.
The second thing that nobody'sgoing to tell you and this one
is pretty close to my heart andlisten if you're a member of a
12-step program AlcoholicsAnonymous, narcotics Anonymous,
whatever and you found successwith that approach then just
probably skip this one.
But if you're trying to stopdrinking alcohol, you're not an
alcoholic.
Right, you've got nothing wrongwith you.
(04:35):
I've unpacked this many timeson the channel, but a medical
professional will never call youan alcoholic.
This has stopped, which is agreat thing, because what
happens when you call yourselfan alcoholic is you say that you
are the problem If you drinksomething that dehydrates you
and lowers your inhibitions andyou end up drinking more than
you intended to.
That has got nothing to do withyou.
(04:56):
Now, this was a big realizationto me in my journey when I was
stopping drinking, because,rather than blaming myself, I
could now attack the problemwith the drug alcohol.
And what I had to do, insteadof fixing myself because there's
nothing wrong with you is I hadto fix my perception of the
drug.
Now my own mother has been toAA for over 20 years.
That program saved my lifebecause if she didn't get sober
(05:17):
with that program, my life wouldhave just been a disaster.
But when I tried that approachno, it wasn't for me, and I'm
not trying to brush things underthe rug and say that you don't
have a problem, but this ideathat you are the problem is
wrong.
We need to separate you fromthe problem and attack the
problem instead of attacking youas a person.
You're not the problem, alcoholis the problem, and let's not
(05:37):
forget that distinction.
You're perfectly fine the waythat you are, and listen, that
might not go down well witheverybody, but these kind of
things helped me.
They were like light bulbmoments, like feelings of relief
, like okay, well, if I'm notthe problem, then I can fix the
damn problem.
And you can, but not if youcarry this baggage around for
the rest of your life, thislabel for the rest of your life.
Number three, and this willhappen to everybody that stops
(05:58):
drinking.
But you're not going to hearthis anywhere else.
If you go and watch some of thestop drinking video where
someone's talking about thegreat things that have happened,
they will probably gloss overthis.
But when you stop drinkingalcohol, your baseline will be
down here.
You're going to feel pretty bad, otherwise, why would you even
stop in the first place?
Something is going to happen inyour life that spurs change,
that motivates you, which isusually pain.
(06:18):
You will get to a place wherethat pain has gone, where it
will feel normal, and you'llreach a new baseline and you'll
almost forget how bad thingswere.
So when you stop drinkingalcohol, you can start with this
euphoria, right, this optimism,this I can do anything, kind of
attitude and now that's great.
Right, I'm not saying that'sbad at all.
When I felt this way, itmotivated me to make so many
(06:40):
changes in my life.
But I got to a place wherereality kind of hit me.
I still wasn't in the shapethat I wanted to be in.
I didn't have money, I didn'thave a business, I had no
success.
I didn't have a relationship,and there was a point where I
realized, okay, I've stoppeddrinking alcohol, but life just
hasn't mysteriously fixed itself, and you've got to be aware of
this.
See, people are going to talkto you about all the good things
that happen when you stopdrinking, but you will get to a
(07:01):
place where being sober is justyour new baseline and you cannot
forget the pain.
So, whilst it can start off withthis initial euphoria, the most
important thing that you can doduring that initial phase, in
the first couple of months, isjust start taking action.
Start trying to make your lifebetter New gym membership,
getting some coach in your life,working on your career, your
business, working on your family, fixing things.
(07:22):
If you can start gettingmomentum, then, once things feel
normal and once you've almostforgotten the pain, you're
becoming somebody else.
You're evolving as a person.
But just beware of this,because it happens to everybody.
But there's a knockover effectof all of this, which leads me
to the fourth thing thatnobody's going to tell you about
Now.
What happened to me when Istopped drinking alcohol is I
had had a decade-long battlestopping and starting more times
(07:44):
than I can count.
So what do you think myself-trust was like if, every
time, I promised myself Iwouldn't drink and then I broke
that promise to myself?
What do you think that does tosomebody's self-esteem and
self-confidence If youcontinually tell yourself right,
I'm going to take X, y, zaction, and then you don't take
that action.
You don't feel good and this iswhy drinking can hold you back
in such a massive way.
(08:05):
Because if you tell yourselfyou're going to drink less and
then you overdrink or you'regoing to stop drinking, and then
you drink again and relapse, Ipromise you this spills into
every area of your life.
Any goal that you set.
You're kind of setting thisprecedent of well, I set a goal
(08:25):
for myself, but it's not thatimportant.
You almost set this weird rulethat it's okay to break
commitments to yourself, and I'mnot trying to say that you
can't build a good life andbreak promises to yourself with
drinking.
Right, you might be in a goodplace in your life right now,
but one thing I will promise youfor certain is when you stop
drinking alcohol and you keepthe promise that you've made to
yourself, that will have such aknock-on effect to every area of
your life.
I have worked with people whohave gone from business idea to
(08:46):
hundreds of millions of dollarsin company valuation no kidding.
I've worked with people whosewives have kicked them out of
the house, said I've had enoughof you.
If you don't fix it, it's over.
And I've seen them rebuildtheir marriage.
I've seen people go fromoverweight, looking terrible, to
being in the best shape they'veever been.
I've seen this happen so manytimes because, through stopping
drinking and staying committed,they now have the self-trust to
(09:08):
go and commit to other areas oftheir life.
Now, if you want help makingthat commitment, if you want to
go through a completely new wayof stopping drinking where we
help you reframe the way thatyou view alcohol and then we use
coaching to really focus onbuilding this great quality
future, click the link downbelow, fill in an application
and you can book a freeconsultation to see if the Sober
Clear program could be a goodmatch for you.
We've worked with hundreds ofpeople now high-level business
(09:29):
owners, professionals.
So if you want to see if it's agood match, go and click the
link down below, fill in theapplication book in a call and
we'll speak to you soon.
Thanks for checking out theStop Drinking Podcast by Sober
Clear.
If you want to learn more abouthow we work with people to help
them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit
(09:52):
wwwsoberclearcom.
Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help
you make stopping drinking asimple, logical and easy
decision.
We help you with tips, toolsand strategies to start living
your best life when alcohol-free.
If you want to learn more aboutstop drinking coaching, then
head over to wwwsoberclearcom.
(00:21):
I struggled with alcohol foralmost 10 years and alcohol was
by far the biggest source ofpain that I had in my life.
It was responsible for everybad decision I ever made.
Okay, ultimately I made thedecision, but alcohol was always
linked to it in some way.
Whether it was an argumentsaying the wrong thing to the
wrong person, a stupid financialdecision pretty much every bad
(00:43):
thing that happened in my lifewas linked to alcohol in some
way.
I tried stopping drinking withAA.
With willpower, I dropped to myknees in church and just begged
God to help me, but nothingworked.
Seven years ago everythingchanged.
I changed the way that I viewedalcohol and my life looks
totally different.
But today I'm going to unpackfour things that nobody is going
to tell you about stoppingdrinking.
(01:03):
And I say nobody because whenyou try and stop drinking
alcohol, you're going to get somany mixed messages.
One friend is going to say well, why don't you just cut down,
like me, you might go to thedoctor and they might say well,
you should drink the recommendeddaily allowance.
You go and read the alcoholbottle and it just tells you to
drink responsibly.
See, the things that I'm goingto tell you are kind of what you
need to hear but probably don'twant to hear.
(01:25):
So this video might make you alittle bit uncomfortable, and
that's okay If you haven't metyet.
My name is Leon Sylvester.
I'm the founder ofSoberClearcom and if you
actually want to access a freevideo training that shows you
how to control your drinking inas little as 24 hours, you can
click the link in thedescription, put in your name
and email address and then a newvideo will start playing that's
going to show you a new,scientifically validated
(01:46):
approach to getting in controlof your drinking quickly.
So just click the link downbelow, put your name and email
address in and definitely checkthat one out.
But now let's unpack things.
So number one and this won'tmake sense until I fully unpack
it but if you stop drinkingalcohol or you want to stop
drinking alcohol and let's sayyou've got a friend that stopped
, you might have a friend thatjust decided one day.
(02:06):
Do you know what I'm notdrinking?
And that friend of yours.
They could be a few monthssober, a few years sober, and
for them it was just like I'mjust going to not drink, and
that was it.
They didn't drink.
I've got people like this in mylife and all they did was use
their human will to stopdrinking.
Now, does this exist?
Of course it does.
There are people out there thatuse willpower to stop drinking
all of the time.
I have used willpower hundredsof times and it's fine.
(02:27):
You can use willpower to notdrink alcohol, but what people
aren't going to tell you is thatit rarely works long term.
See, when we use willpower tonot drink, what we're doing is
we're resisting the urge todrink, because that's what we're
doing.
We're exerting our will and ourpersonal strength against a
craving or a thought of drinking.
But making a decision to notdrink should not have anything
(02:48):
to do with willpower.
Think about it like this let'ssay you drink a lot of water,
but let's say you always addlemon and lime into your water.
If, all of a sudden, I said doyou know what?
No more lemon and lime in yourwater, are you going to need to
use willpower to just drinkplain water.
Are you going to need to fightthe urge to squeeze the lemon
and lime into your drink?
No, you're just going to befine, like it's just whatever.
See, the whole idea of usingwillpower to not drink alcohol
(03:10):
is a fallacy.
Think about it.
If you need to fight the urgeto not drink, you still see
alcohol as a good thing, assomething that enhances your
life in some way, which is whywillpower never works long-term.
It can work.
I am not saying that therearen't people out there that
stop drinking with willpowerI've done it and there are
people out there that don'tdrink for years, sometimes
decades, with just willpower.
(03:31):
So there are people out therethat do do this.
But listen, I don't want you totake this the wrong way, but if
willpower really worked, thenwe'd probably stop drinking in
our teenage years when we getthat first hangover and we're
like, oh, I feel terrible, I'mnever drinking again.
Do you remember when you toldyourself that?
Because I've told myself thatso many damn times, never again,
never again, never again.
Fight the urge back to the drink.
What you need to do is changethe way that you view alcohol.
(03:54):
Make one decision that's itAgain.
That's what I help people do inmy coaching program in my
company.
If you want more details onthat, just go to SoberClearcom
or click the link down below.
But I'm telling you you do notneed willpower to not drink
alcohol.
You need to see it for what itis, in a purely logical way,
because all it is is ethanol,right, poison.
You need to see it this waymake one decision and move on
(04:15):
with your life, and that is notsomething you're going to hear
anywhere else.
The second thing that nobody'sgoing to tell you and this one
is pretty close to my heart andlisten if you're a member of a
12-step program AlcoholicsAnonymous, narcotics Anonymous,
whatever and you found successwith that approach then just
probably skip this one.
But if you're trying to stopdrinking alcohol, you're not an
alcoholic.
Right, you've got nothing wrongwith you.
(04:35):
I've unpacked this many timeson the channel, but a medical
professional will never call youan alcoholic.
This has stopped, which is agreat thing, because what
happens when you call yourselfan alcoholic is you say that you
are the problem If you drinksomething that dehydrates you
and lowers your inhibitions andyou end up drinking more than
you intended to.
That has got nothing to do withyou.
(04:56):
Now, this was a big realizationto me in my journey when I was
stopping drinking, because,rather than blaming myself, I
could now attack the problemwith the drug alcohol.
And what I had to do, insteadof fixing myself because there's
nothing wrong with you is I hadto fix my perception of the
drug.
Now my own mother has been toAA for over 20 years.
That program saved my lifebecause if she didn't get sober
(05:17):
with that program, my life wouldhave just been a disaster.
But when I tried that approachno, it wasn't for me, and I'm
not trying to brush things underthe rug and say that you don't
have a problem, but this ideathat you are the problem is
wrong.
We need to separate you fromthe problem and attack the
problem instead of attacking youas a person.
You're not the problem, alcoholis the problem, and let's not
(05:37):
forget that distinction.
You're perfectly fine the waythat you are, and listen, that
might not go down well witheverybody, but these kind of
things helped me.
They were like light bulbmoments, like feelings of relief
, like okay, well, if I'm notthe problem, then I can fix the
damn problem.
And you can, but not if youcarry this baggage around for
the rest of your life, thislabel for the rest of your life.
Number three, and this willhappen to everybody that stops
(05:58):
drinking.
But you're not going to hearthis anywhere else.
If you go and watch some of thestop drinking video where
someone's talking about thegreat things that have happened,
they will probably gloss overthis.
But when you stop drinkingalcohol, your baseline will be
down here.
You're going to feel pretty bad, otherwise, why would you even
stop in the first place?
Something is going to happen inyour life that spurs change,
that motivates you, which isusually pain.
(06:18):
You will get to a place wherethat pain has gone, where it
will feel normal, and you'llreach a new baseline and you'll
almost forget how bad thingswere.
So when you stop drinkingalcohol, you can start with this
euphoria, right, this optimism,this I can do anything, kind of
attitude and now that's great.
Right, I'm not saying that'sbad at all.
When I felt this way, itmotivated me to make so many
(06:40):
changes in my life.
But I got to a place wherereality kind of hit me.
I still wasn't in the shapethat I wanted to be in.
I didn't have money, I didn'thave a business, I had no
success.
I didn't have a relationship,and there was a point where I
realized, okay, I've stoppeddrinking alcohol, but life just
hasn't mysteriously fixed itself, and you've got to be aware of
this.
See, people are going to talkto you about all the good things
that happen when you stopdrinking, but you will get to a
(07:01):
place where being sober is justyour new baseline and you cannot
forget the pain.
So, whilst it can start off withthis initial euphoria, the most
important thing that you can doduring that initial phase, in
the first couple of months, isjust start taking action.
Start trying to make your lifebetter New gym membership,
getting some coach in your life,working on your career, your
business, working on your family, fixing things.
(07:22):
If you can start gettingmomentum, then, once things feel
normal and once you've almostforgotten the pain, you're
becoming somebody else.
You're evolving as a person.
But just beware of this,because it happens to everybody.
But there's a knockover effectof all of this, which leads me
to the fourth thing thatnobody's going to tell you about
Now.
What happened to me when Istopped drinking alcohol is I
had had a decade-long battlestopping and starting more times
(07:44):
than I can count.
So what do you think myself-trust was like if, every
time, I promised myself Iwouldn't drink and then I broke
that promise to myself?
What do you think that does tosomebody's self-esteem and
self-confidence If youcontinually tell yourself right,
I'm going to take X, y, zaction, and then you don't take
that action.
You don't feel good and this iswhy drinking can hold you back
in such a massive way.
(08:05):
Because if you tell yourselfyou're going to drink less and
then you overdrink or you'regoing to stop drinking, and then
you drink again and relapse, Ipromise you this spills into
every area of your life.
Any goal that you set.
You're kind of setting thisprecedent of well, I set a goal
(08:25):
for myself, but it's not thatimportant.
You almost set this weird rulethat it's okay to break
commitments to yourself, and I'mnot trying to say that you
can't build a good life andbreak promises to yourself with
drinking.
Right, you might be in a goodplace in your life right now,
but one thing I will promise youfor certain is when you stop
drinking alcohol and you keepthe promise that you've made to
yourself, that will have such aknock-on effect to every area of
your life.
I have worked with people whohave gone from business idea to
(08:46):
hundreds of millions of dollarsin company valuation no kidding.
I've worked with people whosewives have kicked them out of
the house, said I've had enoughof you.
If you don't fix it, it's over.
And I've seen them rebuildtheir marriage.
I've seen people go fromoverweight, looking terrible, to
being in the best shape they'veever been.
I've seen this happen so manytimes because, through stopping
drinking and staying committed,they now have the self-trust to
(09:08):
go and commit to other areas oftheir life.
Now, if you want help makingthat commitment, if you want to
go through a completely new wayof stopping drinking where we
help you reframe the way thatyou view alcohol and then we use
coaching to really focus onbuilding this great quality
future, click the link downbelow, fill in an application
and you can book a freeconsultation to see if the Sober
Clear program could be a goodmatch for you.
We've worked with hundreds ofpeople now high-level business
(09:29):
owners, professionals.
So if you want to see if it's agood match, go and click the
link down below, fill in theapplication book in a call and
we'll speak to you soon.
Thanks for checking out theStop Drinking Podcast by Sober
Clear.
If you want to learn more abouthow we work with people to help
them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit
(09:52):
wwwsoberclearcom.
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