August 25, 2025 • 8 mins
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help
you make stopping drinking asimple, logical and easy
decision.
We help you with tips, toolsand strategies to start living
your best life when alcohol-free.
If you want to learn more aboutstop drinking coaching, then
head over to wwwsoberclearcom.
(00:21):
Today I'm going to show you howyou can socialize without
drinking alcohol but, mostimportantly, meet better people.
And that sounds so harsh andjudgmental, but you'll see what
I mean.
It's not from a place ofjudgment If we've not met yet.
My name is Leon Sylvester.
I'm the founder ofSoberclearcom.
I haven't drank for seven yearsafter a decade of struggling,
and I now run a coaching companythat helps business owners and
(00:43):
professionals stop drinkingalcohol with a totally new
method.
It's scientifically validated.
It works in as little as 24hours not always, but if you
want information on that, youcan either go to SoberClearcom
or, if you click the link downbelow, you can access a free
video training that shows youhow the method works and how you
can get control of yourdrinking.
You'll just click the linkbelow, put in your name and
email address and then a newvideo will start.
(01:04):
But the stuff that I'm going toteach you in this video today
I've used in my own life toliterally meet Olympic athletes,
to meet people with $100million companies, to meet
people with YouTube channelswith millions of subscribers.
So when I say better, I don'tnecessarily mean that they are
better people.
That's an arbitrary term.
But when I drank alcohol I hadpeople who had shared mutual
(01:24):
goals of drinking alcohol.
Yeah sure, maybe so often I'dfind somebody that drinks
alcohol and then also does a bitof training.
Every so often I'd make friendswith somebody who has a shared
mutual interest and doesn'tdrink.
But when I was drinking alcoholmy primary goal in life was
almost to drink.
That was the main focus.
So when I met people who drankwe'd connect pretty damn fast
and even if we didn't reallyshare that much in common, once
(01:46):
we got a few drinks in us we'dfind some common ground.
But I've just had a friend cometo stay with me.
He came to stay, him and hiswife, for three days, came for
the weekend, had an amazing time.
But after he left I thought fora second.
I thought you know what?
I would never have met thisperson when I drank alcohol.
I'm not going to names drop anddo any of that stuff, because I
just find it weird, but thiswas somebody who, in a way, I
(02:06):
used to look up to and now we'vebecome friends.
Long story short is, I used tolook up to him because I
followed his exercise programeven when I drank, and now this
person has become my friend.
But the reason why he's becomemy friend is all built on a
foundation for me of notdrinking alcohol.
(02:27):
So I'm going to give you a bitof a weird take on this whole
situation of socializing withoutalcohol.
I'm not going to teach you someweird technique of like
remembering people's names.
Go and read how to Win Friendsand Influence People.
That book seriously changed mylife.
But I'm going to give you adifferent take on this whole
thing of socializing withoutalcohol and how you can meet new
I say better quality people.
What I'm saying is people whoare more in alignment with the
goals that you've got in yourlife.
I but to tell you this, I'vekind of got to go back to when I
(02:50):
just stopped drinking.
So I've got to go back sevenyears ago, when I stopped
drinking alcohol.
I had a mentor.
This was a business mentor, andwhat this mentor said to me is
the first thing you've got to dois you've got to take full
responsibility for your life,where you are in your life right
now.
And at that time I justdestroyed my entire life because
of drinking.
I ran out of money, I wasoverweight, just everything had
(03:11):
gone to.
But the mentor basically saidLeon, you got to look at your
life and just take fullresponsibility.
Your life is exactly the way itis because you've designed it
this way.
And when I heard that, oh, Iwanted to cry.
I'm not going to lie, it wasn'tlike a nice thing that he said,
but that gave me the power tochange things.
Anyway, the next thing that hesaid is who you are right now
(03:31):
will never achieve any goal thatyou've got for yourself.
I was thinking what are youtalking about?
I'll just try, I'll just keepgoing to the gym and keep doing
this and do this with thebusiness, and then things are
going to go well.
And he said no, it doesn't worklike that.
He said you need to design theperson that you need to become
in order to effortlessly achievethe goal.
So, for example, if at the time, like, let's say, my goal was
(03:52):
to start this YouTube channel,who do I need to become?
I need to be somebody who'sfocused, somebody who isn't
afraid to put themselves on theinternet.
The fear of judgment is gone.
I need to be somebody thatworks hard, that's able to
research, that has a skill ofmaking YouTube videos, that can
hire somebody to help edit thevideos.
There was all of these thingsthat I had to become in order to
achieve the goal of a YouTubechannel.
And he would always say that youneed to design the person and
(04:14):
then step into becoming thisperson.
Why am I telling you all ofthis?
I tell you this because when Istopped drinking alcohol, I had
a vision for my life.
There was a person I wanted tobecome because there were goals
that I had, and he said you'vegot to sit down, design the
person and then become theperson.
And what you do is you liveyour life with this feedback
loop.
He would say, okay, you'vedesigned the person, live your
life and then, at the end of theday, reflect on what steps
(04:37):
you've taken in the direction ofbecoming that person.
And he would always call itthis positive mental feedback
loop.
Trust me, we'll get back toalcohol in a second, but this
whole thing changed my life insuch a big way.
It made me build this businessright.
It made me build this YouTubechannel the person who I am when
I first stopped drinkingalcohol.
Compared to who I am today,they wouldn't even recognize
each other.
Sure, that might sound a littlebit weird.
(04:57):
Technically I am the sameperson, but I'm a different
character.
When I designed the person Ihad to become the beliefs, the
mindset like.
Who is this person Once I'dstopped drinking alcohol is.
I changed my behavior.
I had a vision for my life,started changing my behavior and
started moving in thisdirection.
But then something interestinghappened.
I started attracting peopleinto my life who were in
(05:18):
alignment with this person Iwanted to become, and my friends
ended up becoming very similarto the character who I had to
become.
So I ended up finding a lot offriends that were doing YouTube
right, that were doing content,that were helping people.
I ended up finding friends thatwere into health and fitness
and powerlifting and CrossFitand all of this stuff.
And as my business grew, Iended up attracting a lot of
(05:38):
business people, a lot ofsuccessful people, into my
program.
But why?
Why did this happen and why amI even telling you this?
See, I am of the belief that weattract into our life who we
are.
What I mean by this is that ifyou drink a lot of alcohol and
you kind of put that out intothe world, then it's very likely
that you're going to attractthose people back into your life
.
That's what happened to me.
I'm sure you can relate to this.
(05:59):
But if you're putting out thatvibe, that energy, it's probably
going to come back to you, thesame way that you might have met
people in your life that arejust so negative and pessimistic
.
Nothing's ever right and it'salmost like these people just
keep attracting bad luck.
And what I found in myexperience is when I started
changing who I was, changing mybehavior, changing the way that
I viewed myself, and startedtaking action, it was weird.
(06:20):
It was like the right peoplejust started coming into my life
.
So, when it comes to socializingwithout alcohol, it's not just
about not drinking.
It's not just about, I don'tknow, learning some technique to
like talk to a stranger in anetworking event.
No, the most important thingyou can do when it comes to
socializing without alcohol isimproving you as a person.
It's defining your goals, yourdreams, the things that you want
(06:41):
in your life.
It's designing the character,designing the person you need to
become and just living inalignment with that, and I
promise you that's when you'llstart making progress.
That's when, a year from now,you look back at your life and
you're like, oh, I'm sodifferent.
Look at me, I'm back in shape,I'm making progress in my career
.
My family life is better thanever and what happened to me is
the people who I had a goodrelationship with that I drank
(07:03):
with.
These relationships juststarted disappearing, but they
were replaced with people whowere more in alignment with the
life I wanted to live.
So when I say better, you knowthat's kind of binary, right?
People aren't good or bad.
There's just people out therethat are more in alignment with
the character I want to become.
So if you want to socializewithout drinking alcohol, it's
an adjustment and you might gothrough a bit of a lonely period
(07:25):
.
You might realize, okay, well,a lot of these people in my life
they're not really my friendsand outside of drinking, I've
got nothing in common with them.
It's not uncommon for people tobreak up with long-term
relationships, sometimes getdivorced after they stop
drinking.
All sorts of things happen.
But the most important thing youcan do is number one is not
drink, because that's thefoundation of everything.
And then number two is startdesigning the character you want
(07:48):
to become, define the goals andthen move in that direction.
And it's like magic and I'm notgoing to lie, it does sound a
little bit like pseudoscience,but it works for me.
So all I do on this channel isshare what's worked for me,
share what's worked with theclients I've helped.
So if you want to attractbetter people into your life,
have a better social life and abetter network and a better
romantic relationship, whateverit may be, the foundation is to
(08:14):
number one, not drink alcohol.
And then, number two get better.
Thanks for checking out theStop Drinking Podcast by Sober
Clear.
If you want to learn more abouthow we work with people to help
them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit
wwwsoberclearcom.
Welcome to the Stop Drinking Podcast, where we help
you make stopping drinking asimple, logical and easy
decision.
We help you with tips, toolsand strategies to start living
your best life when alcohol-free.
If you want to learn more aboutstop drinking coaching, then
head over to wwwsoberclearcom.
(00:21):
Today I'm going to show you howyou can socialize without
drinking alcohol but, mostimportantly, meet better people.
And that sounds so harsh andjudgmental, but you'll see what
I mean.
It's not from a place ofjudgment If we've not met yet.
My name is Leon Sylvester.
I'm the founder ofSoberclearcom.
I haven't drank for seven yearsafter a decade of struggling,
and I now run a coaching companythat helps business owners and
(00:43):
professionals stop drinkingalcohol with a totally new
method.
It's scientifically validated.
It works in as little as 24hours not always, but if you
want information on that, youcan either go to SoberClearcom
or, if you click the link downbelow, you can access a free
video training that shows youhow the method works and how you
can get control of yourdrinking.
You'll just click the linkbelow, put in your name and
email address and then a newvideo will start.
(01:04):
But the stuff that I'm going toteach you in this video today
I've used in my own life toliterally meet Olympic athletes,
to meet people with $100million companies, to meet
people with YouTube channelswith millions of subscribers.
So when I say better, I don'tnecessarily mean that they are
better people.
That's an arbitrary term.
But when I drank alcohol I hadpeople who had shared mutual
(01:24):
goals of drinking alcohol.
Yeah sure, maybe so often I'dfind somebody that drinks
alcohol and then also does a bitof training.
Every so often I'd make friendswith somebody who has a shared
mutual interest and doesn'tdrink.
But when I was drinking alcoholmy primary goal in life was
almost to drink.
That was the main focus.
So when I met people who drankwe'd connect pretty damn fast
and even if we didn't reallyshare that much in common, once
(01:46):
we got a few drinks in us we'dfind some common ground.
But I've just had a friend cometo stay with me.
He came to stay, him and hiswife, for three days, came for
the weekend, had an amazing time.
But after he left I thought fora second.
I thought you know what?
I would never have met thisperson when I drank alcohol.
I'm not going to names drop anddo any of that stuff, because I
just find it weird, but thiswas somebody who, in a way, I
(02:06):
used to look up to and now we'vebecome friends.
Long story short is, I used tolook up to him because I
followed his exercise programeven when I drank, and now this
person has become my friend.
But the reason why he's becomemy friend is all built on a
foundation for me of notdrinking alcohol.
(02:27):
So I'm going to give you a bitof a weird take on this whole
situation of socializing withoutalcohol.
I'm not going to teach you someweird technique of like
remembering people's names.
Go and read how to Win Friendsand Influence People.
That book seriously changed mylife.
But I'm going to give you adifferent take on this whole
thing of socializing withoutalcohol and how you can meet new
I say better quality people.
What I'm saying is people whoare more in alignment with the
goals that you've got in yourlife.
I but to tell you this, I'vekind of got to go back to when I
(02:50):
just stopped drinking.
So I've got to go back sevenyears ago, when I stopped
drinking alcohol.
I had a mentor.
This was a business mentor, andwhat this mentor said to me is
the first thing you've got to dois you've got to take full
responsibility for your life,where you are in your life right
now.
And at that time I justdestroyed my entire life because
of drinking.
I ran out of money, I wasoverweight, just everything had
(03:11):
gone to.
But the mentor basically saidLeon, you got to look at your
life and just take fullresponsibility.
Your life is exactly the way itis because you've designed it
this way.
And when I heard that, oh, Iwanted to cry.
I'm not going to lie, it wasn'tlike a nice thing that he said,
but that gave me the power tochange things.
Anyway, the next thing that hesaid is who you are right now
(03:31):
will never achieve any goal thatyou've got for yourself.
I was thinking what are youtalking about?
I'll just try, I'll just keepgoing to the gym and keep doing
this and do this with thebusiness, and then things are
going to go well.
And he said no, it doesn't worklike that.
He said you need to design theperson that you need to become
in order to effortlessly achievethe goal.
So, for example, if at the time, like, let's say, my goal was
(03:52):
to start this YouTube channel,who do I need to become?
I need to be somebody who'sfocused, somebody who isn't
afraid to put themselves on theinternet.
The fear of judgment is gone.
I need to be somebody thatworks hard, that's able to
research, that has a skill ofmaking YouTube videos, that can
hire somebody to help edit thevideos.
There was all of these thingsthat I had to become in order to
achieve the goal of a YouTubechannel.
And he would always say that youneed to design the person and
(04:14):
then step into becoming thisperson.
Why am I telling you all ofthis?
I tell you this because when Istopped drinking alcohol, I had
a vision for my life.
There was a person I wanted tobecome because there were goals
that I had, and he said you'vegot to sit down, design the
person and then become theperson.
And what you do is you liveyour life with this feedback
loop.
He would say, okay, you'vedesigned the person, live your
life and then, at the end of theday, reflect on what steps
(04:37):
you've taken in the direction ofbecoming that person.
And he would always call itthis positive mental feedback
loop.
Trust me, we'll get back toalcohol in a second, but this
whole thing changed my life insuch a big way.
It made me build this businessright.
It made me build this YouTubechannel the person who I am when
I first stopped drinkingalcohol.
Compared to who I am today,they wouldn't even recognize
each other.
Sure, that might sound a littlebit weird.
(04:57):
Technically I am the sameperson, but I'm a different
character.
When I designed the person Ihad to become the beliefs, the
mindset like.
Who is this person Once I'dstopped drinking alcohol is.
I changed my behavior.
I had a vision for my life,started changing my behavior and
started moving in thisdirection.
But then something interestinghappened.
I started attracting peopleinto my life who were in
(05:18):
alignment with this person Iwanted to become, and my friends
ended up becoming very similarto the character who I had to
become.
So I ended up finding a lot offriends that were doing YouTube
right, that were doing content,that were helping people.
I ended up finding friends thatwere into health and fitness
and powerlifting and CrossFitand all of this stuff.
And as my business grew, Iended up attracting a lot of
(05:38):
business people, a lot ofsuccessful people, into my
program.
But why?
Why did this happen and why amI even telling you this?
See, I am of the belief that weattract into our life who we
are.
What I mean by this is that ifyou drink a lot of alcohol and
you kind of put that out intothe world, then it's very likely
that you're going to attractthose people back into your life
.
That's what happened to me.
I'm sure you can relate to this.
(05:59):
But if you're putting out thatvibe, that energy, it's probably
going to come back to you, thesame way that you might have met
people in your life that arejust so negative and pessimistic
.
Nothing's ever right and it'salmost like these people just
keep attracting bad luck.
And what I found in myexperience is when I started
changing who I was, changing mybehavior, changing the way that
I viewed myself, and startedtaking action, it was weird.
(06:20):
It was like the right peoplejust started coming into my life
.
So, when it comes to socializingwithout alcohol, it's not just
about not drinking.
It's not just about, I don'tknow, learning some technique to
like talk to a stranger in anetworking event.
No, the most important thingyou can do when it comes to
socializing without alcohol isimproving you as a person.
It's defining your goals, yourdreams, the things that you want
(06:41):
in your life.
It's designing the character,designing the person you need to
become and just living inalignment with that, and I
promise you that's when you'llstart making progress.
That's when, a year from now,you look back at your life and
you're like, oh, I'm sodifferent.
Look at me, I'm back in shape,I'm making progress in my career
.
My family life is better thanever and what happened to me is
the people who I had a goodrelationship with that I drank
(07:03):
with.
These relationships juststarted disappearing, but they
were replaced with people whowere more in alignment with the
life I wanted to live.
So when I say better, you knowthat's kind of binary, right?
People aren't good or bad.
There's just people out therethat are more in alignment with
the character I want to become.
So if you want to socializewithout drinking alcohol, it's
an adjustment and you might gothrough a bit of a lonely period
(07:25):
.
You might realize, okay, well,a lot of these people in my life
they're not really my friendsand outside of drinking, I've
got nothing in common with them.
It's not uncommon for people tobreak up with long-term
relationships, sometimes getdivorced after they stop
drinking.
All sorts of things happen.
But the most important thing youcan do is number one is not
drink, because that's thefoundation of everything.
And then number two is startdesigning the character you want
(07:48):
to become, define the goals andthen move in that direction.
And it's like magic and I'm notgoing to lie, it does sound a
little bit like pseudoscience,but it works for me.
So all I do on this channel isshare what's worked for me,
share what's worked with theclients I've helped.
So if you want to attractbetter people into your life,
have a better social life and abetter network and a better
romantic relationship, whateverit may be, the foundation is to
(08:14):
number one, not drink alcohol.
And then, number two get better.
Thanks for checking out theStop Drinking Podcast by Sober
Clear.
If you want to learn more abouthow we work with people to help
them stop drinking effortlessly, then make sure to visit
wwwsoberclearcom.
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