September 15, 2025 • 33 mins
What does it really mean to be free?
In this episode of Stories of Change and Creativity, Judy Oskam sits down with Christian Ray Flores—a high-performance coach, entrepreneur, and author of the Little Book of Big Reasons to Love America: A Love Letter from an Immigrant.
Christian has lived through revolutions and the fall of the Soviet Union. From that perspective, he offers a powerful take on the American spirit and freedom. He also shares how living your brand and leaning into your unique expertise can open the door and make a real impact.
In this episode you’ll learn
- Why freedom is personal power
- How the spirit of America shapes opportunity and resilience
- The risks of trading freedom for comfort and certainty
- How to live your brand and turn your expertise into impact
Contact Christian Ray Flores
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Judy Oskam (00:02):
What does freedom really mean?
Well, welcome to Stories ofChange and Creativity, and on
this episode, I'm joined by RayFlores.
He's a high-performance coachand entrepreneur.
.
he's the author of The LittleBook of Big Reasons to Love
America (00:18):
A Love Letter from an Immigrant.
Christian has lived throughrevolutions and the fall of the
Soviet Union.
He's seen firsthand thatfreedom is more than politics.
It's about personal power theability to use our expertise to
shape our future.
In this episode, he shares histake on the American spirit and
(00:40):
I think you'll get sometakeaways about how to live your
brand so you can have maximumimpact and create your own
legacy.
I hope you enjoy ourconversation.
Christian Ray Flores (00:53):
I wrote the book because I moved to the
States, let's say 21 years ago,something like that, and I was a
frequent visitor, et cetera,for a long time.
But I married an American.
She actually moved out of theStates to be with me in Russia
and we lived there and then wemoved for all kinds of different
reasons and when I arrived Ikept saying to Deb, my wife look
(01:13):
, this is special about America,this is special about America,
and it was not just sort ofthese superficial things, it's
sort of the thing behind thething, right, the culture, the
economic sort of backbone, thepolitical system, things like
that, and I would geek out onthat and I would be so excited
(01:34):
about it that eventually shewould go well, you have to write
these things down.
And eventually she sort of mademe write it.
When there was this very notableturn I think noticeable turn
towards the negative right Inthe public discourse we felt, I
felt for sure that there wassort of this rise of
self-loathing in the country.
(01:55):
You know, not healthy criticism, but just almost like
everything American is bad, andto someone like myself and I'm
sure if you have people in theaudience who come from the third
world, they're immigrants.
It's actually almost offensiveto hear that we go, you have no
idea, you have no perspective.
Get a life, go outside, livefor six months a year, three
(02:18):
years, in a place where there'sno freedom and then tell me
about all the things that arewrong with this place.
So it's an optimistic book.
It's 10 chapters, 10 reasons tolove America.
There's all kinds ofillustrations, from personal
archives, ai-createdillustrations, qr codes to video
, so it's a very interactivemultimedia kind of thing.
But it's an optimistic book inessence, for people who perhaps
(02:39):
have just felt thatself-loathing in the cultural
discourse and want to justremind themselves hey, there's
some good here.
That's basically it.
Judy Oskam (02:53):
Well, and what I like about the book is you can
take any chapter and start there.
Christian Ray Flores (02:57):
You can really take each.
Judy Oskam (02:58):
Each is a passage.
They're not necessarily inorder, but I kind of like that
because you can pick it up andread it for two or three minutes
.
Five minutes read a chapter andthen really get the essence and
the feel and then follow upwith some of the research.
Christian Ray Flores (03:13):
It's a quick read.
Yeah, it's a quick read.
It was meant almost like acoffee table kind of read Three
and a half hours.
You can read the whole thingRight right right.
Judy Oskam (03:26):
Well, I think what's interesting is your perspective
on what which caused you towrite the book and your
background coming from just sucha worldview.
What is it to you and youtouched on it earlier what is it
about the spirit of America?
What is it to you that reallymakes it so?
Christian Ray Flores (03:42):
And because I because.
Judy Oskam (03:43):
I feel that too, I really do.
Christian Ray Flores (03:46):
I, I, you know, I've, I've thought about
it a lot.
And the reason I thought aboutit a lot is because I have quite
literally had immersiveexperiences in all kinds of
cultures, right, so, this isquite literally my sixth country
in my fourth continent.
And when you have not just sortof like visiting as a tourist
for a week, or inside knowledge,right of the, almost like the
(04:10):
texture of the place, that, thetaste of the place, it it does,
america does stand out as almost.
I think I ended up calling itlike an, a cultural stack.
It's not one thing, it's acultural stack.
It's not one thing, it's acombination of things.
It's sort of the stars aligningat the same time.
And to me it's this profoundtreasuring of individual
(04:37):
freedoms that's at the core ofit.
And the thing is, you'll findthat in constitutions all over
the world, because what theycopied and pasted American text,
or sort of the broad strokes ofit.
But it's, and the thing is,you'll find that in
constitutions all over the world, because that what they they
copied and pasted the americantext, or sort of the the broad
strokes of it, but it's not deepin the culture.
And there's a differencebetween what's on paper and
what's culturally and a baseline, and in america individual
(04:58):
freedoms are a base, a culturalin the texture, in the very
texture of the culture.
Entrepreneurship, I would sayit's another one, um a really
interesting the differentiatorbetween western countries that
are really, because they'resecular, they're, they're rich,
the texture of family has beeneroded and so it has.
(05:21):
It has been eroded in americaas and I would say, in the third
world, family is much strongeron some level, but in general
authority hierarchy, things likethat, and then you have family
(05:46):
as part of this, almost like arigid skeleton of a nation In
America.
When people came here, theyleft all of these things behind
and there was no such thing here.
The main thing was the family.
So my theory is that family,although it has eroded quite a
bit in the 20th, 21st century,it still has a very profound
(06:10):
place in American culture thatis not even found, not in the
West, in other places, but alsonot even found in the global
South.
Let's call it.
People just rely on familyquite a bit and I think that's
really healthy, very important.
I think that a culture ofexperimentation,
entrepreneurship and, almostlike this, anti-fragility I call
(06:31):
it right, there's a termanti-fragility, that's another
thing right.
In very traditional, very oldcultures, saving face is super
important and failure is frownedupon.
In America, failure is like abadge of honor, which is a big
deal.
Actually, I think it's also avery charitable culture.
(06:52):
Americans are very generous.
Per capita, they give a lot,you know, to charities,
nonprofits, things like that,and the role of faith on almost
like this cultural level is abig deal as well.
So it's a country that doesbelieve in God and it's also
eroded, but I think it's alsostill deep in the texture of the
(07:15):
American culture.
Western Europe, for example,has lost that part quite a long
time ago part quite a long timeago.
Judy Oskam (07:29):
Well, and I think too, if you take all of that and
that becomes the fabric of whoyou are, and now you're turning
towards others and you'rehelping them develop their
businesses, develop yourcoaching practice, how do you
use those values?
How?
Christian Ray Flores (07:43):
do you use those values?
I'm teaching Americans to bemore American.
Judy Oskam (07:47):
Okay, I love that.
That's what I'm doing.
I love that and pulling fromwhat the founders started, right
?
Christian Ray Flores (07:55):
Yes, exactly, because it's
fascinating how, in a freecountry, how unfree people can
be.
You know they have the choices,but they become sort of
prisoners, captives of status,of decreasing risk, increasing
(08:16):
certainty.
So they trade freedom forcertainty.
Judy Oskam (08:23):
Right.
Christian Ray Flores (08:23):
You have the paycheck, you have the
career path, you want thecertainty, you have the mortgage
and you have the spouse and thekids and the Labrador and you
don't take risks anymore.
Judy Oskam (08:33):
Yeah, I love that.
Christian Ray Flores (08:36):
That's so true, and so you're not
necessarily in an oppressiveenvironment, but you create your
own prison by not trying newthings, by not risking and why
do you think people do that?
Judy Oskam (08:47):
Because I deal with students a lot too at the
university and I'm alwaystelling them, giving them
permission to just go forwardand create their own life.
To me, it's about permissionfor some reason and I use that
in my coaching a little bit toois why don't people feel like
they have permission to do that?
Christian Ray Flores (09:08):
I think it's.
I think it's sort of thismulti-generational flow, that
cycle I would say right, youknow, they say that strong
people create good times, goodtimes create weak people, weak
people create bad times, andthen bad times create strong
people, and so it goes right andand that's.
I think that's actually true.
Now you, now I think you, canbreak that cycle by creating
(09:30):
hard times on purpose, which isthe essence of entrepreneurship.
Judy Oskam (09:35):
Exactly.
Christian Ray Flores (09:35):
When you start something new, you are
literally creating chaos andchallenges for yourself and a
source of stress and anxiety andcreating hard times in creating
hard times.
So if you start hard times onyour own, rather than forced to
endure hard times from theoutside in, you started from the
inside out, you will create astronger person in yourself and
(09:57):
then your kids as well.
So you can break that cycle.
But the natural cycle, I thinkit's true, that's how it goes.
That's why a lot of immigrantsthat come from hard times they
do so well here and then theylook around and you know, and
look at all these complainingAmericans and go what is wrong
with you guys?
Right, this is a land ofopportunity.
No one's trying to arrest youin the middle of the night.
(10:19):
You can speak your mind, youcan start a company.
No one's going to take yourbusiness away just because what
is wrong with you guys?
Like, please be grateful.
And you know it's not personal.
I think people are not trying tobe ungrateful.
I think it's just, you know,good times create weak people
and then weak people complainand create hard times.
(10:40):
So, yeah, so, but you can breakthat cycle conscientiously and
I think that's sort of the, the,the coaching that I do, which
is personal branding and highperformance, is that it's
helping Americans create hardtimes so they can create a
future that is completelydifferent from their own, rather
than going with the rinse andrepeat, rinse and repeat of
where they are, which can becomfortable, but it's utterly
(11:02):
uninspiring because you're sortof on that lane of autopilot
living and you're hoping forbetter times.
You're hoping for more income,for more impact, more
fulfillment, more freedom, butif you do the same thing, you're
not going to get it.
It's just not how life works.
Judy Oskam (11:18):
Right, well, and are you seeing that in your
coaching at all levels, it's notjust the high executive, it's
the mid-range?
Yeah, absolutely.
What are you seeing?
Christian Ray Flores (11:30):
Well, basically, high executive, it's
the mid-range, yeah, absolutely.
What are you seeing?
Well, basically I work withpeople who have expertise, right
, so they can be, you know, ceosor vps of of companies.
But it's not just that.
I mean, I work with people whohave expertise, who can
basically productize theirexpertise and then create a
business out of it.
Right, it's a lifestylebusiness, it's an expertise
direct to consumer kind ofbusiness, and it doesn't you
(11:53):
don't have to be this big, bigshot person to do it at all.
I'll give you an example.
I was, I'm in, talking aboutfreedom and personal branding.
I'm in, I'm spending two monthsin Mexico right now.
Right, so I'm in Playa delCarmen.
I go to the beach a lot.
We spent four or five days inCozumel and I went on a dive.
So in between two dives in thisbeautiful coral reefs, my dive
(12:17):
master, the person who sort ofguides the group, there's like
three or four people in thegroup.
Her name is Lauren, she'sFrench, so we're hanging out
right and the front of the ofthe ship, it's quiet, she's
having a smoke, we're talkingabout life and she's I'm like so
what's up?
You know, what do you, what doyou love about this thing she
goes.
I love diving, I loveprotecting the environment, I
(12:38):
like educating.
I would.
This is, this is what I love todo, but I am also not making
enough money.
I can't keep doing this for along time because I'm I'm sort
of poor right which is true likemost scuba instructors are
doing this for a long time,because I'm sort of poor right
which is true Like mostschoolboy instructors are doing
it for the lifestyle and theydon't get paid well.
But I also and she goes I wantto travel and explore new places
and sort of maybe settle in aplace that I like most.
(12:59):
And we actually talked about aplace that I'm going to next
year, mozambique, which we havean afterschool academy there, so
I go every two years.
I was like I'm going toMozambique, she goes, oh, that's
exactly where I want to go, andso we started talking about
these things.
So she asked me about what I doand I said, for example, you
can be sort of the classic divemaster, right, you take four or
five people every single day,but you care about the
(13:22):
environment, you want to haveimpact, you care about education
, you have expertise.
You can be just that.
Or you can be a dive master whopublishes bring a camera, turn
it on, create some content,educate people about what not to
do, what to do about the gear,about places to go.
Now you're a dive master with amedia component to it, you can
(13:43):
actually have a 100%, a thousandpercent more impact.
You can probably 2x 3x yourincome If you attach to that
educational program we actuallytrain people online.
You can 10x your income andyour impact and you have choices
and you don't have to changeyour lifestyle.
She was looking at me goingreally, I'm like, yeah, so
(14:06):
anybody with expertise can havethat and that's essentially what
I do.
Judy Oskam (14:10):
I love that, and so is she going to do it.
Do you think she's going to doit?
Christian Ray Flores (14:14):
By the look on her eyes.
I don't think she's going to doit now, but she's going to do
it when things get particularlyhard, which is sort of the
typical thing, right?
Judy Oskam (14:21):
You know what?
Christian Ray Flores (14:21):
you ought to do.
You know you can do it and youshould do it.
But because you know you can doit and you should do it, but
because you know it's pain rightyeah you have to endure the
hard times of building somethinglike that, the when you do it
only when the pain of stayingthe same is more than the pain
of building something new.
And I think the smartest peopleand honestly all of us are like
(14:44):
that right, but the smartestpeople I know train themselves
to actually not wait for thatpain and just endure the pain
and build a different future.
Judy Oskam (14:54):
Well, and so when you're coaching someone like
that, how do you help themembrace the pain?
If you will?
Christian Ray Flores (15:01):
Well, first of all, they've already
made the decision that they wantto build something different,
sure, true.
So they've already sort ofstepped over that line, that
threshold.
I'm doing this and part of itis actually it's expensive.
So they voted, they invested inthemselves, they made that
investment, and so what happensthen is there's a step-by-step,
(15:23):
there's a lot of guidance,there's a weekly call with a
cohort, there's a group ofpeople who are all building
something.
They're all super exciting, sothat helps right Going.
Oh, I'm not alone and even mystruggles are not sort of this
unique thing for me and oh, Iget advice from this person,
this person and my coach.
So that's really helpful.
Obviously, the program itselfis a very structured
(15:46):
step-by-step that allows you tosort of make these baby steps
and see results, like on weekone, when you enter into
something that's a little bitscary.
You don't know what the outcomeis going to be and you feel a
difference on week one oh okay,now I'm inspired, right Now I'm
all in.
So it's sort of structured in away that helps somebody
(16:08):
emotionally sort of catch upwith this process and deal with
the pain, because they're seeingprogress and momentum.
Judy Oskam (16:14):
Well, and and I'm sure you have I really enjoy the
tiny habits, bj Fogg methods.
What habits do you, do youencourage your, your customers
or your clients to get involvedin?
Christian Ray Flores (16:31):
Well, the first one I have these sort of
three major pillars in the core,which is sort of the initial
three months.
This is where you establishsort of the foundations of what
will propel you forward in thefuture.
And, by the way, in nine to 12weeks we'll get you a business
model and a brand concept by innine to 12 weeks.
That's the promise, Right?
(16:52):
So people go really yeah,absolutely, and we're.
I mean, if we're not confident,we're not going to offer it to
you.
Sure, you know what you know.
It's probably not a good fit,that kind of thing.
So, but basically, the threemain steps in the initial three
months is we work on the fuel.
We all are fueled by somethingright, and we're all fueled.
(17:12):
We all have light fuel and darkfuel, right.
We want a better life.
That's light fuel, right.
All this stuff.
That is good.
But most of us who arepropelled into excellence and
ambition, we also have some darkfuel.
It's the hurts, the pains, the.
I'll show you.
(17:33):
You know you didn't think I wasgood enough, but I'll show you
whoever it was.
Judy Oskam (17:38):
I see the real emotional.
Christian Ray Flores (17:40):
Yeah, the trauma.
That's dark fuel.
Now it's not necessarily a badthing because you can basically
redeem that dark fuel into goodfuel.
So we talk about the fuel andhow to get access to it, how to
turn it into rocket fuel and howto anxious or scared or worried
every single day into creative,excited, clear.
(18:02):
You know, when you're energized, when you have the state of
flow, you can learn that as askill.
You know you might not evenexperience it every day, because
(18:24):
, but everybody knows how, howit feels and everybody knows you
can like quadruple yourproductivity and your
opportunity.
If you're like in that place asa normal place, well, we can
totally teach you how to getthere on demand every day and
that alone it's worth the priceof admission, if I may say yeah,
because it will change yourlife forever and that's and
(18:46):
that's uh productivity hacks.
Judy Oskam (18:48):
Is it habits, or what are we talking about?
Christian Ray Flores (18:52):
It's a whole range of things, but the
core thing is this sort ofcluster of activities that we
call win the day right, which isbasically you meditate because
you don't think about yourthinking every day.
Naturally, and you trainyourself to do that, so it's all
kinds of contemplative things,meditate, move, so it's physical
activity and master a new skill.
(19:14):
You do those three things everysingle day.
You will be unstoppable.
Judy Oskam (19:20):
Love that.
Christian Ray Flores (19:21):
I love that, completely unstoppable.
And people feel the differenceon week one, like it's instant.
It's not this sort of obscurething that we no, no, no.
You will feel the differenceweek one, like it's instant.
It's not this sort of obscurething that we probably no, no,
no.
You will feel the difference Ifyou do the work.
You'll feel the difference onweek one you know so, and
there's a lot to it and tomaster it it takes longer, but
you will absolutely feel thisincredible sort of leap forward.
Judy Oskam (19:43):
Power, you feel power.
Right, that's exactly it.
Power, yeah.
Christian Ray Flores (19:46):
So that's one.
The other one is sort ofunderstanding your edge and
basically what happens is we arenaturally sort of conformed to
being a cognitive machine.
It could be a societal machine,you know, family of origin.
Judy Oskam (20:00):
Family structure, whatever Family structure.
Christian Ray Flores (20:03):
Your school teaches you that.
Your university teaches youthat Any institution will sort
of chop off the edges so we fitbetter into a particular spot.
It's not personal, it's not aconspiracy, it just is right.
Well, what happens?
And that's actually good,because you can conform until
you learn a level of reach, alevel of mastery, where you
(20:25):
should not conform anymore.
You should actually shapeothers right.
So there's a transition.
When it's seasonal, when you'restarting up, when you're just a
student in a thing, yeah, be acognitive machine, learn the
skill, learn the craft, becauseyou know no one cares about your
personality, just get thecoffee, do the mechanical stuff,
(20:45):
do the job right and then, whenyou reach mastery, then you can
be a creator of something.
So most of the people that Iwork with don't have mastery.
They do, so now they need to.
They need to sort of uncogthemselves.
You know I love that they haveto unlearn that conformism is
the the way forward.
So they have to learn actuallywho they truly are and find
(21:08):
their edge and then they canstructure that believe, first of
all, that their edge isvaluable.
We do not believe the thingsthat make us us are valuable.
We just don't.
They're so familiar and we'vebeen trained to do that and it's
so familiar, it's so easy forus.
That's another reason we justdon't believe it's valuable.
So we, we work on finding thevalue and then marrying that to
(21:32):
your actual expertise and that,my friends, is explosive value.
That's the personal brand rightthere.
So now you can take that andyou can productize it and create
a intellectual property aroundit.
Right, and I'm telling you,these are people, I talk to,
people like that all week long.
Right, not only in the programbut outside of it, when I go.
(21:53):
You are like this CMO of thisinsanely massive corporation
like billions of dollars.
I talked to somebody yesterday,right, and you quit that job
for whatever reason, right intogoing to a new season or a new
company.
You have a reputation, but youhave nothing formalized, nothing
(22:17):
structured, nothing productizedfrom 30 years of extraordinary
work.
It's like a treasure that isburied you know, and there's no
value in the treasure becausesomewhere in the ground no one
knows how to get it right.
So we get that treasure andthat's sort of the edge part,
and then only do we talk about abrand and we can get from step
(22:39):
one, step two, step three inabout nine to twelve weeks well,
because you're talking about abrand.
Judy Oskam (22:43):
I'm hearing life.
I'm hearing a whole life.
Focus here yes, absolutely I'mhearing that you're helping
someone kind of accept who theyare and then transcend to the
next level.
That's exactly it.
Yeah, it's legacy.
Christian Ray Flores (22:58):
It's legacy, it's why you're here,
yeah, and then creating sort ofan environment and also a
business model, which is reallyimportant because it serves
nobody.
If you have sort of a generalconcept, then you don't know how
to deliver that value and getsomething that allows you to
serve them perpetually, pay thebills, all those things right.
So it's not just impact, it'salso income.
(23:19):
So, yes, yes, that's the brand.
Judy Oskam (23:23):
Wow, I love that.
I love that.
Wow, and I'm thinking of, youknow, our students at the
university and people that justget out and have a career and
they're starting their careerand and why brand is so
important.
We talk so much about personalbranding, but to start with
someone, to start with them, tosee that and build that, working
(23:44):
with a team like yours or orjust starting, I mean, I think
that's very impactful.
Christian Ray Flores (23:50):
It really is.
It really is absolutely lifechanging.
Judy Oskam (23:53):
Yeah, I love that Well, well, and I'm a gallup
strengths coach, so I alwayshave to ask people about their
natural talents and strengths.
What would you say your naturaltalents are?
Christian Ray Flores (24:03):
I don't know if you've done the
assessment or not, but I think Ihave, and uh, look I, my
natural talents are, and naturalI do it in quotes because I
don't think they're trulynatural.
I think it's nurture plusnature.
You know it's back.
It's all the origin story stuff, right?
Judy Oskam (24:24):
Right.
Christian Ray Flores (24:25):
I think it's.
I know people, I can readpeople, I can feel people, I can
speak into somebody's life onlike a level that most people
can't.
Judy Oskam (24:36):
Empathy, high empathy.
Christian Ray Flores (24:39):
And also figuring out what makes them
tick.
I can take them from point A topoint B.
I mean, that's why I coach.
It's a gift.
Yeah, I would say that I wouldsay brand as creating something
(25:00):
that sticks in the collectiveconsciousness and culture in
greater groups of people.
That's a gift as well, and it'salso, I think, not only nature,
but it is nurture.
You know, I was a refugee atage five.
I was poor, I went through allkinds of drama and everything,
and then in my early twenties Idecided to be a performer and in
(25:26):
a year I was on nationaltelevision in Eastern Europe.
When you learn these things atthis high of a level, which
means everything from image tostage performance to signature,
sound, all of these things, thebreadth of it in your literally
mid-20s, there's a gift there,right, yeah?
Judy Oskam (25:49):
for sure.
Christian Ray Flores (25:51):
And you only perfect it from there.
Judy Oskam (25:52):
A real talent.
Christian Ray Flores (25:54):
Yeah, that is absolute.
You know, I can feel it.
It's easy for me to see a brandin sort of a raw, sort of a
blob of a collection ofexpertise and people and context
and markets.
So I can dig around and go, oh,this is the brand right here.
You know, this is how you shapeit, you know.
So that's another one.
And I think culture creation,culture creation is a big deal.
Judy Oskam (26:21):
You know, I had to learn culture so fast when I was
a kid because I was you had tosurvive, I had to survive.
Christian Ray Flores (26:24):
yeah, so for survival, I moved from four
countries by age seven, so likeit almost like accelerates, your
almost, like you're a sponge ofculture.
You understand culture at sucha deeper level so I can shape
culture right.
I know how to create anenvironment like my cohorts.
When people come together inthese up to 10 people groups
(26:46):
online, it's like effervescentwith energy and creativity and
mutual support and people justlove it.
So I know how to create thatenvironment and that's a gift as
well.
Judy Oskam (26:57):
I think, yeah, yeah, I love that and your love of
America and how you integratethe spirit of America and
freedom and freedom.
Christian Ray Flores (27:07):
Oh my gosh , that's.
You're absolutely right.
The you know when I am, I, Igrew up in environments that are
so unfree.
So unfree, you know, likeentrepreneurship is illegal, for
example.
That's how it was in the SovietUnion.
Speech is completely not free.
Like you watch what you think,not just what you say.
(27:28):
It's so toxic, it's so toxic.
So that gives me this like Ihave an allergic reaction to any
environment that is oppressive,institutionalized sort of
restrictions.
I just cannot stand thosethings right.
So I'm not a very goodcorporate employee, for example.
(27:49):
So I discovered that veryquickly that I just can't
because of the background.
I discovered that very quicklythat, oh, I, just, I just I just
can't, you know, because of thebackground.
On the, on the bright side, I,I can see.
I can see that people's desiresto be truly, truly free and I
can.
I have the ability to say, hey,I know how you feel.
You're unfree in a free country.
(28:11):
You're still unfree, let's getyou free, but it's self-imposed.
Yeah, it's totally self-imposed.
Yeah, yeah, so you acceptconformity for relative
stability.
Or comfort for basic comfort,maybe For basic comfort, yeah,
for predictability, forcertainty, you accept it and you
(28:34):
become unfree in all kinds ofways, and that is a disservice
to the world.
Because your talent is unique,your treasure is unique and if
we can mine it, we can find it.
We can mine it, we can combineit, integrate it with your skill
set and then we can create aproduct, intellectual property
(28:56):
that you can actually serve theworld in a way that is so unique
and so special.
And so you, that will elevatefirst of all how you serve, your
impact, the outcomes youprovide for people.
It will definitely impact yourincome, because now you're
(29:17):
either an entrepreneur, youstart a new thing, or you're an
entrepreneur you started withinyour organization, which is
totally fine.
Or you're a social entrepreneur,you can be a charity leader, a
pastor, but you use the sameessentially muscles, the same
skill sets in any of thoseenvironments and your level of
contribution just skyrocketsright.
And maybe one environmentoffers less of a financial sort
(29:42):
of leap, but it gives you moreimpact, which is totally fine.
Another environment, thecorporate, it could be financial
Plus.
You become valued.
You understand how to exchangevalue for money money, not your
time and your hustle for money,and especially that applies to
women.
Judy Oskam (29:58):
Actually sure yeah, there's a lot of gendered things
.
Christian Ray Flores (30:01):
Oh my gosh yeah, I mean women in in in
sort of high-powered positions,they compromise.
They compromise their family,which is so natural for them, so
vital for them.
They compromise parenting tostay on.
And if they learn, hey, this isnot a weakness, this is
actually a strength, right, andif I can sort of understand how
(30:22):
to present myself in and providevalue, rather than saying, yeah
, I'm going to stand, I'm goingto work for 80 hours a week just
for the privilege of being inthis position.
It's so unnatural and unhealthyand you can be so miserable,
you know.
So, you can actually learn howto not compromise those things
(30:48):
and you will not lose positionand impact.
Judy Oskam (30:51):
And you will gain personal power.
Christian Ray Flores (30:54):
Exactly, Isn't.
What we're talking about ispersonal power on the inside and
the outside right.
Judy Oskam (30:55):
Internally and impact and you will gain
personal power.
Exactly Isn't?
What we're talking about ispersonal power on the inside and
the outside right.
Christian Ray Flores (30:58):
Internally and externally.
Yeah, there's nothing moreAmerican than that right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Judy Oskam (31:04):
I love that and, and I think I think you've you've,
you've got a great formula and Ithink, because of your
background, you really aretapping into something here that
is really valuable for us.
Christian Ray Flores (31:18):
Yeah, yeah , I think so too, and that's
sort of why I'm so excited toteach it to others, because all
of us have this untapped valuethat we're not even, most of the
time, we're not even aware thatthis is actually valuable.
It's so familiar that it's notvaluable, that this is actually
valuable.
It's so familiar that it's notvaluable.
So what we're doing is we'reintegrating your actual hard
skills, with the value that isabsolutely unique, into
(31:41):
something that is very unique.
You can't compete.
There's nothing, there's nocompetition because there's only
one of you.
Judy Oskam (31:48):
Yeah.
So, so someone's seeing.
Well, there's already expertsin diving, to use your example
earlier.
Well, but there's not that oneperson who wants to go to
Mozambique and teach, educate.
Christian Ray Flores (32:01):
With a charming French accent, with a
particular set of preferencesand insights into diving into
corals, into gear, intolocations, into hacks of how to
do that better, there's only one, Loren right.
And there's either a Loren thatdoesn't share, that doesn't
structure it, or it's a Lorenwho publishes, or there's a
(32:23):
Loren who publishes and createsan educational path for other
people to benefit from herskills.
Judy Oskam (32:30):
Same person same passions, very different
outcomes.
Yeah, yeah, I love that.
Christian Ray Flores (32:33):
Christian.
Thank you so much.
Outcomes yeah, yeah.
Judy Oskam (32:35):
I love that, Christian.
Thank you so much.
Thank you for your time.
Christian Ray Flores (32:39):
Judy, thank you.
Thanks for having me.
Judy Oskam (32:41):
And I want to thank you, the listener, for sharing
your time with us.
The takeaways for me Christianreminds us that freedom isn't
only about where you live.
It's also about how you live,choosing risk over comfort and
choosing power over fear, and Ilike how we really dove in and
explained about.
(33:02):
It's important to use ourexpertise, the skills and the
experiences that are truly ourown Well.
Maybe those can become thefoundation for a future that we
create on our own terms.
Well, if this conversationinspired you or you just enjoyed
listening, hit, follow andshare the show with a friend and
(33:25):
leave a positive review.
It really helps more peoplefind the show and remember if
you've got a story to share orknow someone who does reach out
to me at judyoskam.
com.
Thanks for listening.
What does freedom really mean?
Well, welcome to Stories ofChange and Creativity, and on
this episode, I'm joined by RayFlores.
He's a high-performance coachand entrepreneur.
.
he's the author of The LittleBook of Big Reasons to Love
America (00:18):
A Love Letter from an Immigrant.
Christian has lived throughrevolutions and the fall of the
Soviet Union.
He's seen firsthand thatfreedom is more than politics.
It's about personal power theability to use our expertise to
shape our future.
In this episode, he shares histake on the American spirit and
(00:40):
I think you'll get sometakeaways about how to live your
brand so you can have maximumimpact and create your own
legacy.
I hope you enjoy ourconversation.
Christian Ray Flores (00:53):
I wrote the book because I moved to the
States, let's say 21 years ago,something like that, and I was a
frequent visitor, et cetera,for a long time.
But I married an American.
She actually moved out of theStates to be with me in Russia
and we lived there and then wemoved for all kinds of different
reasons and when I arrived Ikept saying to Deb, my wife look
(01:13):
, this is special about America,this is special about America,
and it was not just sort ofthese superficial things, it's
sort of the thing behind thething, right, the culture, the
economic sort of backbone, thepolitical system, things like
that, and I would geek out onthat and I would be so excited
(01:34):
about it that eventually shewould go well, you have to write
these things down.
And eventually she sort of mademe write it.
When there was this very notableturn I think noticeable turn
towards the negative right Inthe public discourse we felt, I
felt for sure that there wassort of this rise of
self-loathing in the country.
(01:55):
You know, not healthy criticism, but just almost like
everything American is bad, andto someone like myself and I'm
sure if you have people in theaudience who come from the third
world, they're immigrants.
It's actually almost offensiveto hear that we go, you have no
idea, you have no perspective.
Get a life, go outside, livefor six months a year, three
(02:18):
years, in a place where there'sno freedom and then tell me
about all the things that arewrong with this place.
So it's an optimistic book.
It's 10 chapters, 10 reasons tolove America.
There's all kinds ofillustrations, from personal
archives, ai-createdillustrations, qr codes to video
, so it's a very interactivemultimedia kind of thing.
But it's an optimistic book inessence, for people who perhaps
(02:39):
have just felt thatself-loathing in the cultural
discourse and want to justremind themselves hey, there's
some good here.
That's basically it.
Judy Oskam (02:53):
Well, and what I like about the book is you can
take any chapter and start there.
Christian Ray Flores (02:57):
You can really take each.
Judy Oskam (02:58):
Each is a passage.
They're not necessarily inorder, but I kind of like that
because you can pick it up andread it for two or three minutes
.
Five minutes read a chapter andthen really get the essence and
the feel and then follow upwith some of the research.
Christian Ray Flores (03:13):
It's a quick read.
Yeah, it's a quick read.
It was meant almost like acoffee table kind of read Three
and a half hours.
You can read the whole thingRight right right.
Judy Oskam (03:26):
Well, I think what's interesting is your perspective
on what which caused you towrite the book and your
background coming from just sucha worldview.
What is it to you and youtouched on it earlier what is it
about the spirit of America?
What is it to you that reallymakes it so?
Christian Ray Flores (03:42):
And because I because.
Judy Oskam (03:43):
I feel that too, I really do.
Christian Ray Flores (03:46):
I, I, you know, I've, I've thought about
it a lot.
And the reason I thought aboutit a lot is because I have quite
literally had immersiveexperiences in all kinds of
cultures, right, so, this isquite literally my sixth country
in my fourth continent.
And when you have not just sortof like visiting as a tourist
for a week, or inside knowledge,right of the, almost like the
(04:10):
texture of the place, that, thetaste of the place, it it does,
america does stand out as almost.
I think I ended up calling itlike an, a cultural stack.
It's not one thing, it's acultural stack.
It's not one thing, it's acombination of things.
It's sort of the stars aligningat the same time.
And to me it's this profoundtreasuring of individual
(04:37):
freedoms that's at the core ofit.
And the thing is, you'll findthat in constitutions all over
the world, because what theycopied and pasted American text,
or sort of the broad strokes ofit.
But it's, and the thing is,you'll find that in
constitutions all over the world, because that what they they
copied and pasted the americantext, or sort of the the broad
strokes of it, but it's not deepin the culture.
And there's a differencebetween what's on paper and
what's culturally and a baseline, and in america individual
(04:58):
freedoms are a base, a culturalin the texture, in the very
texture of the culture.
Entrepreneurship, I would sayit's another one, um a really
interesting the differentiatorbetween western countries that
are really, because they'resecular, they're, they're rich,
the texture of family has beeneroded and so it has.
(05:21):
It has been eroded in americaas and I would say, in the third
world, family is much strongeron some level, but in general
authority hierarchy, things likethat, and then you have family
(05:46):
as part of this, almost like arigid skeleton of a nation In
America.
When people came here, theyleft all of these things behind
and there was no such thing here.
The main thing was the family.
So my theory is that family,although it has eroded quite a
bit in the 20th, 21st century,it still has a very profound
(06:10):
place in American culture thatis not even found, not in the
West, in other places, but alsonot even found in the global
South.
Let's call it.
People just rely on familyquite a bit and I think that's
really healthy, very important.
I think that a culture ofexperimentation,
entrepreneurship and, almostlike this, anti-fragility I call
(06:31):
it right, there's a termanti-fragility, that's another
thing right.
In very traditional, very oldcultures, saving face is super
important and failure is frownedupon.
In America, failure is like abadge of honor, which is a big
deal.
Actually, I think it's also avery charitable culture.
(06:52):
Americans are very generous.
Per capita, they give a lot,you know, to charities,
nonprofits, things like that,and the role of faith on almost
like this cultural level is abig deal as well.
So it's a country that doesbelieve in God and it's also
eroded, but I think it's alsostill deep in the texture of the
(07:15):
American culture.
Western Europe, for example,has lost that part quite a long
time ago part quite a long timeago.
Judy Oskam (07:29):
Well, and I think too, if you take all of that and
that becomes the fabric of whoyou are, and now you're turning
towards others and you'rehelping them develop their
businesses, develop yourcoaching practice, how do you
use those values?
How?
Christian Ray Flores (07:43):
do you use those values?
I'm teaching Americans to bemore American.
Judy Oskam (07:47):
Okay, I love that.
That's what I'm doing.
I love that and pulling fromwhat the founders started, right
?
Christian Ray Flores (07:55):
Yes, exactly, because it's
fascinating how, in a freecountry, how unfree people can
be.
You know they have the choices,but they become sort of
prisoners, captives of status,of decreasing risk, increasing
(08:16):
certainty.
So they trade freedom forcertainty.
Judy Oskam (08:23):
Right.
Christian Ray Flores (08:23):
You have the paycheck, you have the
career path, you want thecertainty, you have the mortgage
and you have the spouse and thekids and the Labrador and you
don't take risks anymore.
Judy Oskam (08:33):
Yeah, I love that.
Christian Ray Flores (08:36):
That's so true, and so you're not
necessarily in an oppressiveenvironment, but you create your
own prison by not trying newthings, by not risking and why
do you think people do that?
Judy Oskam (08:47):
Because I deal with students a lot too at the
university and I'm alwaystelling them, giving them
permission to just go forwardand create their own life.
To me, it's about permissionfor some reason and I use that
in my coaching a little bit toois why don't people feel like
they have permission to do that?
Christian Ray Flores (09:08):
I think it's.
I think it's sort of thismulti-generational flow, that
cycle I would say right, youknow, they say that strong
people create good times, goodtimes create weak people, weak
people create bad times, andthen bad times create strong
people, and so it goes right andand that's.
I think that's actually true.
Now you, now I think you, canbreak that cycle by creating
(09:30):
hard times on purpose, which isthe essence of entrepreneurship.
Judy Oskam (09:35):
Exactly.
Christian Ray Flores (09:35):
When you start something new, you are
literally creating chaos andchallenges for yourself and a
source of stress and anxiety andcreating hard times in creating
hard times.
So if you start hard times onyour own, rather than forced to
endure hard times from theoutside in, you started from the
inside out, you will create astronger person in yourself and
(09:57):
then your kids as well.
So you can break that cycle.
But the natural cycle, I thinkit's true, that's how it goes.
That's why a lot of immigrantsthat come from hard times they
do so well here and then theylook around and you know, and
look at all these complainingAmericans and go what is wrong
with you guys?
Right, this is a land ofopportunity.
No one's trying to arrest youin the middle of the night.
(10:19):
You can speak your mind, youcan start a company.
No one's going to take yourbusiness away just because what
is wrong with you guys?
Like, please be grateful.
And you know it's not personal.
I think people are not trying tobe ungrateful.
I think it's just, you know,good times create weak people
and then weak people complainand create hard times.
(10:40):
So, yeah, so, but you can breakthat cycle conscientiously and
I think that's sort of the, the,the coaching that I do, which
is personal branding and highperformance, is that it's
helping Americans create hardtimes so they can create a
future that is completelydifferent from their own, rather
than going with the rinse andrepeat, rinse and repeat of
where they are, which can becomfortable, but it's utterly
(11:02):
uninspiring because you're sortof on that lane of autopilot
living and you're hoping forbetter times.
You're hoping for more income,for more impact, more
fulfillment, more freedom, butif you do the same thing, you're
not going to get it.
It's just not how life works.
Judy Oskam (11:18):
Right, well, and are you seeing that in your
coaching at all levels, it's notjust the high executive, it's
the mid-range?
Yeah, absolutely.
What are you seeing?
Christian Ray Flores (11:30):
Well, basically, high executive, it's
the mid-range, yeah, absolutely.
What are you seeing?
Well, basically I work withpeople who have expertise, right
, so they can be, you know, ceosor vps of of companies.
But it's not just that.
I mean, I work with people whohave expertise, who can
basically productize theirexpertise and then create a
business out of it.
Right, it's a lifestylebusiness, it's an expertise
direct to consumer kind ofbusiness, and it doesn't you
(11:53):
don't have to be this big, bigshot person to do it at all.
I'll give you an example.
I was, I'm in, talking aboutfreedom and personal branding.
I'm in, I'm spending two monthsin Mexico right now.
Right, so I'm in Playa delCarmen.
I go to the beach a lot.
We spent four or five days inCozumel and I went on a dive.
So in between two dives in thisbeautiful coral reefs, my dive
(12:17):
master, the person who sort ofguides the group, there's like
three or four people in thegroup.
Her name is Lauren, she'sFrench, so we're hanging out
right and the front of the ofthe ship, it's quiet, she's
having a smoke, we're talkingabout life and she's I'm like so
what's up?
You know, what do you, what doyou love about this thing she
goes.
I love diving, I loveprotecting the environment, I
(12:38):
like educating.
I would.
This is, this is what I love todo, but I am also not making
enough money.
I can't keep doing this for along time because I'm I'm sort
of poor right which is true likemost scuba instructors are
doing this for a long time,because I'm sort of poor right
which is true Like mostschoolboy instructors are doing
it for the lifestyle and theydon't get paid well.
But I also and she goes I wantto travel and explore new places
and sort of maybe settle in aplace that I like most.
(12:59):
And we actually talked about aplace that I'm going to next
year, mozambique, which we havean afterschool academy there, so
I go every two years.
I was like I'm going toMozambique, she goes, oh, that's
exactly where I want to go, andso we started talking about
these things.
So she asked me about what I doand I said, for example, you
can be sort of the classic divemaster, right, you take four or
five people every single day,but you care about the
(13:22):
environment, you want to haveimpact, you care about education
, you have expertise.
You can be just that.
Or you can be a dive master whopublishes bring a camera, turn
it on, create some content,educate people about what not to
do, what to do about the gear,about places to go.
Now you're a dive master with amedia component to it, you can
(13:43):
actually have a 100%, a thousandpercent more impact.
You can probably 2x 3x yourincome If you attach to that
educational program we actuallytrain people online.
You can 10x your income andyour impact and you have choices
and you don't have to changeyour lifestyle.
She was looking at me goingreally, I'm like, yeah, so
(14:06):
anybody with expertise can havethat and that's essentially what
I do.
Judy Oskam (14:10):
I love that, and so is she going to do it.
Do you think she's going to doit?
Christian Ray Flores (14:14):
By the look on her eyes.
I don't think she's going to doit now, but she's going to do
it when things get particularlyhard, which is sort of the
typical thing, right?
Judy Oskam (14:21):
You know what?
Christian Ray Flores (14:21):
you ought to do.
You know you can do it and youshould do it.
But because you know you can doit and you should do it, but
because you know it's pain rightyeah you have to endure the
hard times of building somethinglike that, the when you do it
only when the pain of stayingthe same is more than the pain
of building something new.
And I think the smartest peopleand honestly all of us are like
(14:44):
that right, but the smartestpeople I know train themselves
to actually not wait for thatpain and just endure the pain
and build a different future.
Judy Oskam (14:54):
Well, and so when you're coaching someone like
that, how do you help themembrace the pain?
If you will?
Christian Ray Flores (15:01):
Well, first of all, they've already
made the decision that they wantto build something different,
sure, true.
So they've already sort ofstepped over that line, that
threshold.
I'm doing this and part of itis actually it's expensive.
So they voted, they invested inthemselves, they made that
investment, and so what happensthen is there's a step-by-step,
(15:23):
there's a lot of guidance,there's a weekly call with a
cohort, there's a group ofpeople who are all building
something.
They're all super exciting, sothat helps right Going.
Oh, I'm not alone and even mystruggles are not sort of this
unique thing for me and oh, Iget advice from this person,
this person and my coach.
So that's really helpful.
Obviously, the program itselfis a very structured
(15:46):
step-by-step that allows you tosort of make these baby steps
and see results, like on weekone, when you enter into
something that's a little bitscary.
You don't know what the outcomeis going to be and you feel a
difference on week one oh okay,now I'm inspired, right Now I'm
all in.
So it's sort of structured in away that helps somebody
(16:08):
emotionally sort of catch upwith this process and deal with
the pain, because they're seeingprogress and momentum.
Judy Oskam (16:14):
Well, and and I'm sure you have I really enjoy the
tiny habits, bj Fogg methods.
What habits do you, do youencourage your, your customers
or your clients to get involvedin?
Christian Ray Flores (16:31):
Well, the first one I have these sort of
three major pillars in the core,which is sort of the initial
three months.
This is where you establishsort of the foundations of what
will propel you forward in thefuture.
And, by the way, in nine to 12weeks we'll get you a business
model and a brand concept by innine to 12 weeks.
That's the promise, Right?
(16:52):
So people go really yeah,absolutely, and we're.
I mean, if we're not confident,we're not going to offer it to
you.
Sure, you know what you know.
It's probably not a good fit,that kind of thing.
So, but basically, the threemain steps in the initial three
months is we work on the fuel.
We all are fueled by somethingright, and we're all fueled.
(17:12):
We all have light fuel and darkfuel, right.
We want a better life.
That's light fuel, right.
All this stuff.
That is good.
But most of us who arepropelled into excellence and
ambition, we also have some darkfuel.
It's the hurts, the pains, the.
I'll show you.
(17:33):
You know you didn't think I wasgood enough, but I'll show you
whoever it was.
Judy Oskam (17:38):
I see the real emotional.
Christian Ray Flores (17:40):
Yeah, the trauma.
That's dark fuel.
Now it's not necessarily a badthing because you can basically
redeem that dark fuel into goodfuel.
So we talk about the fuel andhow to get access to it, how to
turn it into rocket fuel and howto anxious or scared or worried
every single day into creative,excited, clear.
(18:02):
You know, when you're energized, when you have the state of
flow, you can learn that as askill.
You know you might not evenexperience it every day, because
(18:24):
, but everybody knows how, howit feels and everybody knows you
can like quadruple yourproductivity and your
opportunity.
If you're like in that place asa normal place, well, we can
totally teach you how to getthere on demand every day and
that alone it's worth the priceof admission, if I may say yeah,
because it will change yourlife forever and that's and
(18:46):
that's uh productivity hacks.
Judy Oskam (18:48):
Is it habits, or what are we talking about?
Christian Ray Flores (18:52):
It's a whole range of things, but the
core thing is this sort ofcluster of activities that we
call win the day right, which isbasically you meditate because
you don't think about yourthinking every day.
Naturally, and you trainyourself to do that, so it's all
kinds of contemplative things,meditate, move, so it's physical
activity and master a new skill.
(19:14):
You do those three things everysingle day.
You will be unstoppable.
Judy Oskam (19:20):
Love that.
Christian Ray Flores (19:21):
I love that, completely unstoppable.
And people feel the differenceon week one, like it's instant.
It's not this sort of obscurething that we no, no, no.
You will feel the differenceweek one, like it's instant.
It's not this sort of obscurething that we probably no, no,
no.
You will feel the difference Ifyou do the work.
You'll feel the difference onweek one you know so, and
there's a lot to it and tomaster it it takes longer, but
you will absolutely feel thisincredible sort of leap forward.
Judy Oskam (19:43):
Power, you feel power.
Right, that's exactly it.
Power, yeah.
Christian Ray Flores (19:46):
So that's one.
The other one is sort ofunderstanding your edge and
basically what happens is we arenaturally sort of conformed to
being a cognitive machine.
It could be a societal machine,you know, family of origin.
Judy Oskam (20:00):
Family structure, whatever Family structure.
Christian Ray Flores (20:03):
Your school teaches you that.
Your university teaches youthat Any institution will sort
of chop off the edges so we fitbetter into a particular spot.
It's not personal, it's not aconspiracy, it just is right.
Well, what happens?
And that's actually good,because you can conform until
you learn a level of reach, alevel of mastery, where you
(20:25):
should not conform anymore.
You should actually shapeothers right.
So there's a transition.
When it's seasonal, when you'restarting up, when you're just a
student in a thing, yeah, be acognitive machine, learn the
skill, learn the craft, becauseyou know no one cares about your
personality, just get thecoffee, do the mechanical stuff,
(20:45):
do the job right and then, whenyou reach mastery, then you can
be a creator of something.
So most of the people that Iwork with don't have mastery.
They do, so now they need to.
They need to sort of uncogthemselves.
You know I love that they haveto unlearn that conformism is
the the way forward.
So they have to learn actuallywho they truly are and find
(21:08):
their edge and then they canstructure that believe, first of
all, that their edge isvaluable.
We do not believe the thingsthat make us us are valuable.
We just don't.
They're so familiar and we'vebeen trained to do that and it's
so familiar, it's so easy forus.
That's another reason we justdon't believe it's valuable.
So we, we work on finding thevalue and then marrying that to
(21:32):
your actual expertise and that,my friends, is explosive value.
That's the personal brand rightthere.
So now you can take that andyou can productize it and create
a intellectual property aroundit.
Right, and I'm telling you,these are people, I talk to,
people like that all week long.
Right, not only in the programbut outside of it, when I go.
(21:53):
You are like this CMO of thisinsanely massive corporation
like billions of dollars.
I talked to somebody yesterday,right, and you quit that job
for whatever reason, right intogoing to a new season or a new
company.
You have a reputation, but youhave nothing formalized, nothing
(22:17):
structured, nothing productizedfrom 30 years of extraordinary
work.
It's like a treasure that isburied you know, and there's no
value in the treasure becausesomewhere in the ground no one
knows how to get it right.
So we get that treasure andthat's sort of the edge part,
and then only do we talk about abrand and we can get from step
(22:39):
one, step two, step three inabout nine to twelve weeks well,
because you're talking about abrand.
Judy Oskam (22:43):
I'm hearing life.
I'm hearing a whole life.
Focus here yes, absolutely I'mhearing that you're helping
someone kind of accept who theyare and then transcend to the
next level.
That's exactly it.
Yeah, it's legacy.
Christian Ray Flores (22:58):
It's legacy, it's why you're here,
yeah, and then creating sort ofan environment and also a
business model, which is reallyimportant because it serves
nobody.
If you have sort of a generalconcept, then you don't know how
to deliver that value and getsomething that allows you to
serve them perpetually, pay thebills, all those things right.
So it's not just impact, it'salso income.
(23:19):
So, yes, yes, that's the brand.
Judy Oskam (23:23):
Wow, I love that.
I love that.
Wow, and I'm thinking of, youknow, our students at the
university and people that justget out and have a career and
they're starting their careerand and why brand is so
important.
We talk so much about personalbranding, but to start with
someone, to start with them, tosee that and build that, working
(23:44):
with a team like yours or orjust starting, I mean, I think
that's very impactful.
Christian Ray Flores (23:50):
It really is.
It really is absolutely lifechanging.
Judy Oskam (23:53):
Yeah, I love that Well, well, and I'm a gallup
strengths coach, so I alwayshave to ask people about their
natural talents and strengths.
What would you say your naturaltalents are?
Christian Ray Flores (24:03):
I don't know if you've done the
assessment or not, but I think Ihave, and uh, look I, my
natural talents are, and naturalI do it in quotes because I
don't think they're trulynatural.
I think it's nurture plusnature.
You know it's back.
It's all the origin story stuff, right?
Judy Oskam (24:24):
Right.
Christian Ray Flores (24:25):
I think it's.
I know people, I can readpeople, I can feel people, I can
speak into somebody's life onlike a level that most people
can't.
Judy Oskam (24:36):
Empathy, high empathy.
Christian Ray Flores (24:39):
And also figuring out what makes them
tick.
I can take them from point A topoint B.
I mean, that's why I coach.
It's a gift.
Yeah, I would say that I wouldsay brand as creating something
(25:00):
that sticks in the collectiveconsciousness and culture in
greater groups of people.
That's a gift as well, and it'salso, I think, not only nature,
but it is nurture.
You know, I was a refugee atage five.
I was poor, I went through allkinds of drama and everything,
and then in my early twenties Idecided to be a performer and in
(25:26):
a year I was on nationaltelevision in Eastern Europe.
When you learn these things atthis high of a level, which
means everything from image tostage performance to signature,
sound, all of these things, thebreadth of it in your literally
mid-20s, there's a gift there,right, yeah?
Judy Oskam (25:49):
for sure.
Christian Ray Flores (25:51):
And you only perfect it from there.
Judy Oskam (25:52):
A real talent.
Christian Ray Flores (25:54):
Yeah, that is absolute.
You know, I can feel it.
It's easy for me to see a brandin sort of a raw, sort of a
blob of a collection ofexpertise and people and context
and markets.
So I can dig around and go, oh,this is the brand right here.
You know, this is how you shapeit, you know.
So that's another one.
And I think culture creation,culture creation is a big deal.
Judy Oskam (26:21):
You know, I had to learn culture so fast when I was
a kid because I was you had tosurvive, I had to survive.
Christian Ray Flores (26:24):
yeah, so for survival, I moved from four
countries by age seven, so likeit almost like accelerates, your
almost, like you're a sponge ofculture.
You understand culture at sucha deeper level so I can shape
culture right.
I know how to create anenvironment like my cohorts.
When people come together inthese up to 10 people groups
(26:46):
online, it's like effervescentwith energy and creativity and
mutual support and people justlove it.
So I know how to create thatenvironment and that's a gift as
well.
Judy Oskam (26:57):
I think, yeah, yeah, I love that and your love of
America and how you integratethe spirit of America and
freedom and freedom.
Christian Ray Flores (27:07):
Oh my gosh , that's.
You're absolutely right.
The you know when I am, I, Igrew up in environments that are
so unfree.
So unfree, you know, likeentrepreneurship is illegal, for
example.
That's how it was in the SovietUnion.
Speech is completely not free.
Like you watch what you think,not just what you say.
(27:28):
It's so toxic, it's so toxic.
So that gives me this like Ihave an allergic reaction to any
environment that is oppressive,institutionalized sort of
restrictions.
I just cannot stand thosethings right.
So I'm not a very goodcorporate employee, for example.
(27:49):
So I discovered that veryquickly that I just can't
because of the background.
I discovered that very quicklythat, oh, I, just, I just I just
can't, you know, because of thebackground.
On the, on the bright side, I,I can see.
I can see that people's desiresto be truly, truly free and I
can.
I have the ability to say, hey,I know how you feel.
You're unfree in a free country.
(28:11):
You're still unfree, let's getyou free, but it's self-imposed.
Yeah, it's totally self-imposed.
Yeah, yeah, so you acceptconformity for relative
stability.
Or comfort for basic comfort,maybe For basic comfort, yeah,
for predictability, forcertainty, you accept it and you
(28:34):
become unfree in all kinds ofways, and that is a disservice
to the world.
Because your talent is unique,your treasure is unique and if
we can mine it, we can find it.
We can mine it, we can combineit, integrate it with your skill
set and then we can create aproduct, intellectual property
(28:56):
that you can actually serve theworld in a way that is so unique
and so special.
And so you, that will elevatefirst of all how you serve, your
impact, the outcomes youprovide for people.
It will definitely impact yourincome, because now you're
(29:17):
either an entrepreneur, youstart a new thing, or you're an
entrepreneur you started withinyour organization, which is
totally fine.
Or you're a social entrepreneur,you can be a charity leader, a
pastor, but you use the sameessentially muscles, the same
skill sets in any of thoseenvironments and your level of
contribution just skyrocketsright.
And maybe one environmentoffers less of a financial sort
(29:42):
of leap, but it gives you moreimpact, which is totally fine.
Another environment, thecorporate, it could be financial
Plus.
You become valued.
You understand how to exchangevalue for money money, not your
time and your hustle for money,and especially that applies to
women.
Judy Oskam (29:58):
Actually sure yeah, there's a lot of gendered things
.
Christian Ray Flores (30:01):
Oh my gosh yeah, I mean women in in in
sort of high-powered positions,they compromise.
They compromise their family,which is so natural for them, so
vital for them.
They compromise parenting tostay on.
And if they learn, hey, this isnot a weakness, this is
actually a strength, right, andif I can sort of understand how
(30:22):
to present myself in and providevalue, rather than saying, yeah
, I'm going to stand, I'm goingto work for 80 hours a week just
for the privilege of being inthis position.
It's so unnatural and unhealthyand you can be so miserable,
you know.
So, you can actually learn howto not compromise those things
(30:48):
and you will not lose positionand impact.
Judy Oskam (30:51):
And you will gain personal power.
Christian Ray Flores (30:54):
Exactly, Isn't.
What we're talking about ispersonal power on the inside and
the outside right.
Judy Oskam (30:55):
Internally and impact and you will gain
personal power.
Exactly Isn't?
What we're talking about ispersonal power on the inside and
the outside right.
Christian Ray Flores (30:58):
Internally and externally.
Yeah, there's nothing moreAmerican than that right.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Judy Oskam (31:04):
I love that and, and I think I think you've you've,
you've got a great formula and Ithink, because of your
background, you really aretapping into something here that
is really valuable for us.
Christian Ray Flores (31:18):
Yeah, yeah , I think so too, and that's
sort of why I'm so excited toteach it to others, because all
of us have this untapped valuethat we're not even, most of the
time, we're not even aware thatthis is actually valuable.
It's so familiar that it's notvaluable, that this is actually
valuable.
It's so familiar that it's notvaluable.
So what we're doing is we'reintegrating your actual hard
skills, with the value that isabsolutely unique, into
(31:41):
something that is very unique.
You can't compete.
There's nothing, there's nocompetition because there's only
one of you.
Judy Oskam (31:48):
Yeah.
So, so someone's seeing.
Well, there's already expertsin diving, to use your example
earlier.
Well, but there's not that oneperson who wants to go to
Mozambique and teach, educate.
Christian Ray Flores (32:01):
With a charming French accent, with a
particular set of preferencesand insights into diving into
corals, into gear, intolocations, into hacks of how to
do that better, there's only one, Loren right.
And there's either a Loren thatdoesn't share, that doesn't
structure it, or it's a Lorenwho publishes, or there's a
(32:23):
Loren who publishes and createsan educational path for other
people to benefit from herskills.
Judy Oskam (32:30):
Same person same passions, very different
outcomes.
Yeah, yeah, I love that.
Christian Ray Flores (32:33):
Christian.
Thank you so much.
Outcomes yeah, yeah.
Judy Oskam (32:35):
I love that, Christian.
Thank you so much.
Thank you for your time.
Christian Ray Flores (32:39):
Judy, thank you.
Thanks for having me.
Judy Oskam (32:41):
And I want to thank you, the listener, for sharing
your time with us.
The takeaways for me Christianreminds us that freedom isn't
only about where you live.
It's also about how you live,choosing risk over comfort and
choosing power over fear, and Ilike how we really dove in and
explained about.
(33:02):
It's important to use ourexpertise, the skills and the
experiences that are truly ourown Well.
Maybe those can become thefoundation for a future that we
create on our own terms.
Well, if this conversationinspired you or you just enjoyed
listening, hit, follow andshare the show with a friend and
(33:25):
leave a positive review.
It really helps more peoplefind the show and remember if
you've got a story to share orknow someone who does reach out
to me at judyoskam.
com.
Thanks for listening.
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