October 28, 2025 • 47 mins
We dive into how soul contracts, energy healing, and the Akashic Records shape dating, sex, and self-worth, anchored by Kanika’s moving story of loss and awakening. Practical tools help you break toxic patterns, calm inner critics, and choose partners from alignment, not fear.
• co-creation with the universe vs control
• grief as a portal to purpose and truth
• spotting signs, synchronicity and energetic nudges
• soul contracts and lessons in key relationships
• breaking cycles of toxic partners by healing patterns
• root and sacral chakras for safety, desire and creativity
• working with inner critics and archetypes, not against them
• a short guided yes/no practice for clear next steps
• resources to continue healing with meditations and coaching
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
SPEAKER_03 (00:00):
Welcome to the Straight From the Source's Mouth
Podcast.
Frank talk about sex and dating.
Hello, Tamra here.
Welcome to the show.
Today's guest is KanikaVastudeva, an energy coach and
Akashic Records reader.
And we'll be talking about howthese apply to our sex lives.
Thanks for joining me, Kanika.
SPEAKER_01 (00:18):
Thank you so much for having me here tomorrow.
I'm so excited.
SPEAKER_03 (00:21):
Yes, me too.
I have not heard of this KashikReaders or Energy Healing.
I've heard of energy healing abit, but I think this is a
different take.
So I'm excited to hear what youhave to share about it.
SPEAKER_01 (00:31):
Yeah, so Akashic Records are like the mystical
library that actually surroundsall of earth.
And they have information aboutall of us, like all the
information.
Information in this lifetime andinformation in the past
lifetimes, all our connections,everything.
(00:52):
So whether it's energy healingor anything else, people are
always pulling up informationfrom the Kashik records because
that's the central library.
Unknown to them.
SPEAKER_03 (01:03):
Yeah.
I've never heard of it calledlike quite like that.
But yeah, I mean it makes sense.
Like that's what they say.
Some people say that, you know,like is it fate or is it free
will and all that stuff?
Or you know, like, is it kind oflike that, or is it a little
different than those two areas?
SPEAKER_01 (01:19):
I love the question, and I think you're hitting the
ground running.
Um, yes, so we are co-creators,we have free will, but there's
also destiny and there's alsouniversal flow at place.
Maybe I'll start by talking alittle bit about myself and the
work that I do now.
Um, I never wanted to do this.
(01:39):
You know, I grew up as anengineer, then I became an MBA
professional.
I was a project manager workingfor really large corporations,
doing projects, multi-milliondollar projects around the
globe.
And energy coaching or tuninginto Akashic Records is really
never what I had in mind.
(02:00):
I think I was somewhere in mymid-30s.
So that time my Facebook lifelooked really good.
My LinkedIn life looked good.
If you would look at it, youwould see, you know, great stuff
that was going on, except thatinside I was feeling really
empty.
I wasn't in the happiestmarriage.
And I was a mom to a two and ahalf year old almost.
(02:22):
I was trying to understand myspace there because there were
just things happening and I wasunderstanding my identity.
I think this happens a lot withwomen.
When kids get born and suddenlyyour life gets turned, you're
like, okay, who am I now?
You have kids who need you alot.
You've got your family who needsyou a lot.
(02:43):
And you're like, Well, I'm thisnew person, you know.
I had associated my worth withmy output, with my work, with my
salary as well, and theaccomplishments that I was
making there.
And so this was newfoundterritory.
And I was also pregnant with mydaughter at the time.
(03:04):
And this was this weirdjuxtaposition going on with me
at that time because I knew Iwas pregnant with a daughter,
and as excited as I was to haveher, I was also reflecting at my
own life and thinking, gosh, I'mnot happy.
I've done the so-called rightthings, and I'm not really happy
(03:28):
with my life.
And what am I going to give toher?
How is she going to be happy?
And then one day I woke up, Ijust never felt her move in my
tummy, in my belly, and um wentto the doctor, realized that
there was no heartbeat, I had togive birth to a stillborn.
(03:52):
And that was a terrible moment.
That was also a very gracefulmoment.
Because before this, whateverwas happening in my life, I
could numb it, I could pack itaway and not look at it.
Now it was very different.
(04:12):
I was with her, I had her in me,and then I didn't have her.
The house reminded me of herthings because we were preparing
for her arrival.
The bassinet was there, thenursery room was there,
everything because she was 31weeks.
Um and I was suffering withguilt and shame.
(04:35):
That A, I'd not connected withher as much.
I also wanted to know as a momwhether she was okay or not.
I really wanted to find out whathappened and why she didn't come
into life.
So that started my whole journeyinto energy healing.
It wasn't a conscious choice,but I'm giving this example in
the sense that we all havecertain destiny points.
(04:56):
So, yes, there's a co-creator inus, in the sense that every
single moment we can do whateverwe want to do.
And based on that, the next lifesteps will show up.
But if I have a destiny, thereason why I took birth came as
a soul in this physical body,then there was a purpose that
(05:20):
set out.
And my soul is going to try anddo that again and again, bring
me back to that, keep bringingme to this lesson.
So for me, it was yes, I gotinto energy healing, I got into
Vakashic Records then andunderstood or started
(05:41):
understanding my relationship,how I'm a much smaller piece,
how there's a much bigger piecearound the universe, um, destiny
as well.
That all started making sense.
And by the way, with mydaughter, when I connected with
her, and I asked her, you know,why did you not come into my
life?
And she said, Well, you told methat you did not want to waste
(06:04):
this lifetime.
So I actually had an agreementwith her that if I was wasting
this lifetime, that she wouldcome and she would wake me up,
which she did.
So it sounds like a reallyterrible moment, but it actually
was, I think, life's biggestmoment of grace.
And that's what I'd like toleave the listeners with as
(06:25):
well.
That wherever you feel that yourlife's really hard, that you
just cannot go through it, Iwant to tell you, because I've
seen this over and over with allmy clients as well, that this is
where light wants to enterthrough you.
You're not being punished,you're being loved because
(06:46):
you're being driven to yourhigher purpose, you're driven to
your destiny.
Now it's up to you whether youtake the first knock.
Like, you know, life is tellingme, hey, there's something
wrong.
I was feeling unhappy.
So life will give you thosesigns, and then life will just
make it a little bit bigger andbigger to make sure that you go
on your destiny.
SPEAKER_03 (07:08):
Yeah.
Yeah, I know Oprah talks aboutthat too.
Like, first it's like a whisperand then a knock upside the head
and then a brick wall.
At least you, you know, eachtime it gets a little more like
obvious where you really aresupposed to listen.
SPEAKER_01 (07:21):
So yeah, absolutely.
And um, that's what happens alot of times, the coincidences
or the little things that we'rethinking, that is just life's
way of telling you that, hey,listen to this, listen to this,
listen to this.
Often the disalignment that wefeel, the disengagement, and we
start getting used to it.
And I would encourage you not toget used to it, because that is
(07:45):
where light's trying to come in.
Also, if you don't listen towhat you're really supposed to
do, like in some sense, you arecompromising, you know, you are
accepting a relationship becauseit's not too bad, it's a little
bit bad, you're not doing yoursoul's calling because it's sort
(08:05):
of okay to continue on with yourjob, even though it's not
inspiring.
Take the baby steps that you'resupposed to take.
Because if it's on your path, ifthat is what your soul's decided
to do, that needs to happen,whether in this lifetime,
whether in another lifetime, itdoesn't go away.
SPEAKER_03 (08:25):
Yeah.
I mean, it's totally it's notthat related, but I was always
felt drawn to doing stand-upcomedy.
And I was doing it before Istarted my podcast.
I was like, it was scared me todeath, but I couldn't like ever
stop from thinking about doingit.
And I did it for three years.
And now I feel like I did itlike I said I would, and I did
it, and now I've transitioned tothe podcast, and then we'll see
(08:47):
what's next.
SPEAKER_01 (08:48):
But yeah, so I mean maybe not as.
And that's a good story ofcourage, you know.
People don't go out and dothings like that, they don't
really follow the music in theirheart, but you really should.
Um, there's nothing like, well,you're in your 30s or 40s or 50s
and you can't do this.
Actually, give yourself theexample, give yourself the
liberty to do that.
(09:09):
Don't waste life.
There is a lot of competition tocome to life as souls, to be
born here, to come here.
There's a lot of preparationthat goes on.
Don't waste this.
And also give people around youan example.
You know, we always feel there'sthe sabotage in our person in
us.
(09:29):
There's also sometimes a childthat wants to feel just safe,
just loved, taken care of.
So we are not wanting to rufflethe feathers, so to speak.
How things are, we want to keepthem the way they are.
SPEAKER_02 (09:44):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (09:45):
But if everybody did that, humanity would just not
evolve.
You came here with your uniquemix of your light, your gifts,
your talent, your exploration,your ideas, bring them out,
share them in the world.
That's how you make humanity abetter place.
That's how you inspire otherpeople to do their dreams as
well.
So I'm really, really proud ofyou that you went and you did
(10:07):
your stand-up comedy becauseyou've inspired others.
You've inspired your family atleast.
You've inspired people who'veseen you, that you can go out
there and you can do what yourart calls you to do.
SPEAKER_03 (10:20):
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
And I had lots of friends watchon YouTube too, as I posted it.
So yeah.
Yeah, a lot of people.
Yeah, they and I I definitely,and even this podcast too.
Like I just I agreewholeheartedly that people,
there's always everyone hassomething they're thinking about
or really secretly want to do.
And like you said, they shouldjust get out there and take the
baby steps to do towards that.
SPEAKER_01 (10:43):
I think we're afraid that we feel there's no plan.
We feel like, oh, this is what Iwant to do, but I don't really
know the next steps.
But the idea is you're notsupposed to know the next steps.
And here's the thing (10:57):
we think, including myself, long time ago,
I used to think that I'm theperson in charge of my life.
Um, with my daughter, she wasn'teven born.
I was planning out things forher as an example.
I was planning out her clothes,I was planning out her room.
(11:18):
Because I, being the projectmanager, you know, I was
managing, looking after thesituation.
We are not the drivers, we'rethe co-drivers, we're the
co-creators.
Universe has a plan.
And that is the bigger flow.
Like if I think of myself and mysize, I'm a teeny and maybe even
smaller than that compared tothe whole universe.
(11:41):
And yet, I'm putting all thecontrols in place, or I'm
saying, well, I need to see thenext road before I take that
step, because it soundsoutrageous in the human minds.
But if we would just allow thatconnection, if we could just
tune into the universe and trustthat it's looking after us, that
(12:02):
there is a plan that we will beheld, things start becoming a
lot easier.
Often we want to see, and yourreal gifts, the real shine that
you're supposed to have, theywill be a little bit outrageous.
You know, when you share themwith people, they will be like,
What are you talking about?
Nobody's gonna back you forthis.
You know, the first time whenyou went out and you said, Oh,
(12:22):
I'm gonna do my stand-up comedy,somebody would have said, Are
you out of your mind?
unknown (12:27):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (12:45):
Yeah, yeah, I definitely had people like
afraid for me, kind of thing.
SPEAKER_01 (12:52):
Because it sounds so unfeasible to them in the human
mind, but when we let go ofthat, when we let go, I would
say it's a fact that we are justhuman beings, we are souls in
bodies.
So if we let go of controllingwith our little human mind that
(13:14):
I've got to control the outcome,if we surrender, we'll find that
life's a lot bigger.
You know, sometimes we act likelittle kids.
So when you've got a child,maybe two years old, and you're
taking them out of theplayground, and the child
doesn't want to come out, and hescreams and throws a tantrum
because it's like the end of theworld, and maybe the
(13:35):
playground's never gonna happenagain.
And of course, as a parent or acaretaker, you know that you
will bring them back to theplayground, it's not the end of
the world.
But we act like that all thetime with the universe.
Universe shows us some signs,tells us this is what you were
supposed to do, and we're like,mm-mm, no, no, no, no, no.
And then the funny bit, we stillend up blaming the universe or
(13:57):
life, whatever term we want toput to it.
We still end up blaming thatbecause you're not giving me the
right steps.
I'm asking you for guidance,you're not showing me, and the
universe is going like, I amshowing you, I am giving you the
inspiration.
Take the step.
SPEAKER_03 (14:11):
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
And since this is a podcastabout dating and relationships,
do you think I'm guessing youwould imagine this goes into the
same thing, like pickingpartners and being with people?
Like, is there are there do youthink it's a fate destiny kind
of thing for people you end upwith or a plan like that, or is
that more would you say it fallsunder the same thing?
SPEAKER_01 (14:35):
I think we are co-creators, especially our key
relationships.
That would be our mom, our dad,that would be the people we meet
um sexually as well, or our mainrelationships at least.
They are all pre-agreed.
Soul contracts, we all havethem.
(14:57):
Before we come in, we choose ourparents and we choose them for
things that we want to learn andevolve and grow with.
So they're carefully chosen.
Um, our key relationships,they're all carefully chosen as
well.
But having said that, we areco-creators.
So, the reason for all thesecontracts is that there are
(15:20):
certain lessons we're supposedto learn.
For example, in my case, it hasbeen this journey of really
understanding myself, owning mytruth, and then speaking my
truth a lot more.
So I've had parents who'vebought that out for me.
I've had relationshipsrepeatedly who've bought that
(15:40):
out for me.
And I was very much a peoplepleaser without even knowing it.
I think it still runs in somevery deep level of me, where I
just change myself, I become soflexible and change according to
the other person.
(16:01):
And because my sole purpose isto get more aware of myself,
that's why the relationshipsbring that out.
That often the more I becomeflexible, it's like, well,
actually, you were not supposedto do that.
You were supposed to stay inyour truth.
Same way, we'll all have certainlessons that we're all supposed
(16:22):
to learn.
So your relationships willfollow whatever you're supposed
to learn.
Some lessons, if you reallylearned them, then the contracts
that you would have withrelationships.
Let's say if you're having,maybe as an example, a toxic
relationship.
And if you're supposed to havethat so that you can understand
(16:46):
a lot more about betrayal andthen coming back to your center.
But if you've already startedunderstanding that, then the
next levels of that, they arenullified.
Um, let me explain it this way.
Um, how it works is you'resupposed to go, as an example,
(17:06):
from a level one to a levelhundred in certain lessons.
And let's say you start at one,the soul will meet you at one,
it'll give you opportunities atone, and it's not like the
physical world where we justhave plan A, plan B, plan C.
The universe has lots of plansthere, depending on where you're
vibrating and what you'relearning.
And it gives you opportunitiesbased on that.
(17:27):
Now let's say you go all the wayfrom one to five.
So in between, all that two tofour, you don't have to do that
anymore.
Now you're at five and it willmeet you there.
So all our soul contracts, allour relationships, they're
written in that sense, but wemight bypass some things.
Also, some of these contracts,some of the relationships that
(17:49):
we have, they might be based oncertain old programming or old
karmas.
Doesn't mean they can be notrewritten, but sometimes they
can be operating out of oldthings.
So examples here would be let'ssay a mom who for one reason um
(18:11):
had a miscarriage, and thenshe's really afraid of just
childbirth because of how thingstranspired for her, and she
might still be carrying thatmemory into her.
If you have lied in a particularlifetime around something, maybe
(18:32):
lied about something reallymajor with your husband or so
on, you might still be carryingthat impact, bringing that into
this lifetime.
But if you learn those truths,if you understand that the
miscarriage was at that time,you break the contract, then
(18:53):
that lady, and I've seen that,where my client just became
okay.
Initially, there was a pointwhere whenever anyone talked
about having babies, there wassomething in her body that just
froze.
Whereas after the reading, itwas like unhealing, it was okay.
Like, okay, now I can thinkabout babies because initially
(19:15):
she was thinking of babies andher body was freezing because it
was remembering the the passingaway.
It was remembering the pain withthat.
So that had been eased, cleaned,and the body just has a new
operating system.
For the lady who'd spoken liesabout certain really important
(19:36):
things.
When she moved and when sheunderstood that, oh, she's
supposed to speak more with hertruth, then the world opened up
for her as well.
Um, and she started getting moreopportunities, etc.
So our contracts are written ata particular time, but when you
(19:57):
clean them, they change yourrelationships.
If you're attracting toxicrelationships, and you've got to
ask this, right?
In the physical world, yes,person A was at fault because
there was something wrong withthem, person B was at fault,
there was something wrong withthem, person C was at fault.
That's fine.
I hear you, I totally get it.
I've been that person.
(20:18):
But at one stage you've got toask, well, why are they all with
you?
Why did you get them in thefirst place?
unknown (20:25):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (20:26):
What's running on inside you?
When I looked at that for me,there was a lot of healing that
you that I wanted to do, Ineeded to do inside me.
Often, if you're attractingtoxic relationships, look at
what is your pattern and startwith, well, what am I not
learning here?
(20:47):
Because that's the whole point.
Your soul's just trying to getyou to learn something.
What are you not learning?
Are you not standing up foryourself?
Are you not seeing the signs?
What is it?
And tune into that, not runningaway from it, but tuning into it
more.
And then once you've cleared thepatterns, you'll notice that
(21:08):
your relationships show up in alot different way as well.
SPEAKER_03 (21:12):
Yeah, yeah, definitely believe that.
I always I I've told uh otherpeople, but yeah, like th
there's a 10-year period wherethere's three different, I call
them the drunks, you know, thenvarying stages of like alcoholic
or functional alcoholic as oneliked to call himself.
Yeah, and then I took then Idated dated for the first time
(21:32):
for a few years, and then nowI'm like with someone that's
much better, like a nicer andall the good things.
But yeah, I had after taking abreak.
SPEAKER_01 (21:41):
And that's because you worked on yourself.
I took a six-month break.
And that's because you'vecleansed, you've come from that
really whole place.
SPEAKER_03 (21:48):
Yeah, so I definitely agree with what
you're saying.
I can see where it's good toknow that you can learn it and
you don't have to keep learningit.
Like once like you're onceyou've crossed that, you know,
check that box, like, okay,yeah, I understand this now.
I don't have to get that lessonanymore.
SPEAKER_01 (22:02):
You know, in about seven years, all the cells in
our body, they would haveregenerated, they would have
become new cells.
So we are constantlyre-evolving, we are constantly
growing.
Hence, that is an opportunity toconsider that we can let go and
we can really change our lives.
Whatever you are brought into,whatever paradigms you're
(22:24):
brought into, especially you'vetalked about abuse, whether that
is um alcohol, whether that isother sorts of abuse.
If you're coming to that, yourpast does not have to dictate
your future.
You have the free will, youalways have the free will to
break away from that, but you'vereally got to claim it on it and
(22:46):
go like, okay, I am changing mystory.
And again, coming back to theconnection, when you actually
connect with the universe, God,source, whatever you want to
call the divine, when youconnect with that connection and
when you really call in thatintent very strongly and say,
This is where I want to stand inand help me, help me break the
(23:10):
cycle of abuse, help me breakthe cycle of alcoholism,
whatever it is that isstruggling, that is paining you
in this lifetime, even if it ishard work, even if it is
repetitive chores, do that andyou will notice that you will
get that help.
But first ask that and claim itfor yourself because that is
your free will.
(23:30):
We have free will in the sensethat whatever we want to do in
our life, we can.
We can still make whateverchoices the source gives to us,
we can still choose whatever Iwant to do.
So it is still our playground.
And it is up to you to claim,okay, I don't want those limits
(23:52):
anymore.
I'm not going to operate out ofmy old story.
SPEAKER_03 (23:55):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I've had other guests before,it's just because you get kind
of stuck because it's likecomfortable enough.
So you just stay there and youdon't even know there's
something better because you'relike, it's good enough kind of
thing.
So yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (24:08):
And then it's the disalignment that we've got to
really understand.
Um, that oh, when you're feelingdisaligned, when you're feeling
unhappy, there is somethingwrong.
At a vast human scale, there isan agreement that, oh, as we get
(24:29):
older, as we get in the 30s, aswe get in the forties, as we get
in the 50s, you know, thehappiness in life is supposed to
go down.
And if that's happening for you,I want you to go out and just
watch some kids, even if youdon't have them in your house,
go to a playground, just watchkids playing, just watch kids
doing things.
This is how you came in.
They know how to be happy.
(24:50):
They'll be happy looking at astone, they'll be happy climbing
on slides, they will actuallynot run off out of ideas, they
will speak so much, which is whyparents will often say, Ah, he
doesn't stop.
But you came with that.
You came with that zeal of life,you came with that curiosity,
that creativity.
Where did all of that go?
If that life force has stoppedin you, and that's very much a
(25:13):
sacral thing, so that's verymuch the second chakra, the
chakra around sex emotions,that's because you've bottled up
your emotions, you've bottled upstuff that's in there and you've
not let it out.
You have instead of it being ahealthy functioning chakra, it's
become that place which is justsmelly and not feeling good at
(25:37):
all.
Your sacral chakra is the centerof sex at the same time.
Sex is, you know, it it um wethink of it as just sex.
SPEAKER_00 (25:50):
Whereas sex is how life starts.
SPEAKER_01 (25:59):
It's creativity, it is making everything in the
universe, every baby is amiracle.
So every time when you get intothat act, it is it can be
thought of as sex, it can justbe really tinied into that
definition, but it's a lot moreexpansive and a lot more
(26:25):
conscious vibration if you allowthat to be as well.
So when you really tapped in toyour second chakra, that time
you're really tuned in into theflow, natural flow of the
universe.
You really know what's going tohappen, you're in alignment,
your creative juices, they'reall flowing out because this
(26:47):
center is not just aboutbirthing babies, it's also about
birthing new ideas, projects,everything that you want to do
in life, that all starts here.
The birthplace is here, and ourhuman bodies, female human
bodies, they have the uterus,they have the whole reproductive
organs to be able to make ababy, but the same place is also
(27:11):
connected with the breath, withthe rhythm, with the birthplace
of the universe.
I think of the womb, not as justthe womb, but it's also the womb
portal of the universe.
You know, think of the womb assuch.
You'll see it's dark when youthink about it, it's a nice dark
(27:33):
place.
And now look at any picturesthat you would have seen of
space, and you would see thestars, the brightest of the
stars, and they are held in thatshimmery darkish purple place.
(27:54):
That is void, that is thebirthplace where all the stars,
where all the galaxies,everything in the universe and
all the multi-universes, theyall get born in that place.
And this is where your womb,especially for females,
obviously, that's connected to.
So your womb, your place is alot more sacred.
(28:17):
And hence, whatever happens inour lives sexually, can either
feel really violating at adeeply personal level, or it can
feel really deprivating.
Again, it's it's not small, youknow.
Everything that we feel isreally magnified here because
this is a potential force thatyou're correct connecting to.
SPEAKER_03 (28:39):
Yeah, I've never heard it quite that way, but
yeah, I like the sexual healing.
I know you talk about that alittle bit with like old
emotional patterns and thechakra, I'm guessing, is part of
that, or is it like explain moreabout that?
SPEAKER_01 (28:54):
Okay, around the emotional healing or around the
sexual healing.
Clients will come with sometimesthe addiction issues that they
have, or um they'll feel somesort of sexual chemistry
incompatibility with theirpartners.
And that's a symptom.
(29:16):
Your body is always talking toyou, your body is always going
to give you signals that this isnot happening.
Like you might feel thirsty, youmight feel pain in some area,
you will feel, ah, this is notgoing well.
So that's how the body istalking, you know, when you are
interacting with someone else,especially in something as
(29:37):
deeply intimate as sexualintercourse, or just even
whatever you're doing in bed,even if you're not really going
to the full rhythms, but it's avery intimate moment.
Lots of things are happeningthere.
But before I go on to the secondchakra, which is the center for
all of that, let's start withthe root chakra.
Root chakra is just a little bitabove, or it's the tailbone, so
(30:02):
it's right where you're sitting,it's the tip of the tailbone.
Um, root chakra is where we'reall coming out from.
This is our center of belonging.
This is whether we feel okay ornot.
And I'm talking about the rootchakra because as we go up in
the body, wherever you need tofeel a connection, it needs to
(30:25):
if you want to feel complete inthat connection at that level,
you'll first need to also feelcomplete in the connections at
the level below.
So if you're wanting to feelreally good with someone
sexually, it has to start withyou also feeling good with them
(30:47):
physically.
In the first chakra, firstchakra is around belonging.
So how do you feel with theperson?
Do you feel seen, heard?
You know, think of it in termsof the roots.
The tree needs roots to feelstable, to feel like you are
okay.
So do you feel like you can justbe them?
(31:09):
You're not judged because of howyour body looks, how big your
bank account is, and so on, butyou can just be.
So often, if you're feelingthat, oh, I'm not able to do it
with someone else, start withyourself first.
Start with being comfortable inyour own body.
(31:30):
Start with just looking atyourself in the mirror and
complimenting yourself,acknowledging your body.
Start by becoming your bestfriend, not criticizing yourself
in your self-talks that you gotlate for something, that you
didn't do something right.
But just start by bringing thatbelonging to yourself.
(31:53):
Once you start that, then you goon to the next place, which is
the second chakra.
This would be the sexual chakra.
This is also the place ofemotion.
This is also the place ofcreativity.
Then it's it is very, verydeeply um personal.
It's very deep within all of us.
(32:14):
You know, this is where lifestarts for all of us.
This is where we were conceived.
This is where all our Jews oflife lives, whatever we're going
to do in life.
So it's a very intimate space.
Even before it gets physicalwith anyone else, it's just a
very, very intimate space.
So to be here, you want to feelcomfortable in terms of
(32:37):
expressing your emotions.
You want to feel comfortable injust being how you are.
And I would say start withyourself because often we start
looking at everything theopposite way.
We put the onus on someone else.
Do they love me?
Do they like me?
Does he appreciate me or doesshe appreciate me?
(33:00):
But start first with yourself.
You're aligning with theuniverse, right?
That's the main rhythm ofeverything.
You're aligning with theuniversal flow.
So start by loving yourself,start by validating your own
emotions, start by understandingthat that's your inner compass.
So that no matter who you arewith, you are still looking and
(33:22):
hearing what they're saying.
But you've got your innercompass to understand.
Well, they said I was too loud,but was I really, was I okay or
not?
Your inner compass, your innerknowingness should be a lot
deeper than that.
Otherwise, you're gonna startfeeling hurt.
Does that make sense?
Do you have questions here?
SPEAKER_03 (33:42):
Yeah, I know.
I think I yeah, I get it.
Okay.
No, I mean it's definitely theunknown thing to like internal.
So you're the one that'sconnected, obviously.
So you know yourself best, andyou can don't have to agree with
what others say or think aboutyou.
SPEAKER_01 (34:00):
Yeah, like I had this funny story um that they
used to tell us sometimes when Iwas growing up.
There was this guy um long timeago in a village, and he had a
donkey.
And so the donkey was not doingreally well, but he's like
taking him somewhere.
And then as he's walking withthe donkey, some people started
(34:23):
laughing at him that come on,this guy's got a donkey, and you
know, he's not sitting on top ofthe donkey.
Like, what an idiot he is,because he's walking next to the
donkey.
So he said, Okay, you know, I'llsit next to the donkey.
Uh, on the donkey.
So he sat on the donkey and he'swalking, and now some people
they're looking at him andthey're like, doesn't this
(34:43):
person understand the donkey isnot doing well, and yet he's
sitting on top of him?
So then he gets down and uh umand he ends up the story, it's
just hilarious, but it's justsupposed to make us understand
how we can just never be rightif we continue looking at
(35:07):
everyone outside and continuetrying to do what they want us
to do because they're differentpeople, they have different
perspectives.
Like this guy ends up carryingthe donkey, like holding him
across his shoulders andcarrying him like that and does
all sorts of things, but there'snothing that he would do that
was ever right.
SPEAKER_03 (35:24):
Yeah, as soon as he heard someone say something, he
had to fix it.
Yeah, next thing.
SPEAKER_01 (35:29):
Yeah, but it happens a lot with all of us as well,
where we look at someone else,we see, hey, you know, this is
what you did not do, and itreally brings us that, oh, I did
not do that.
We become the biggestcriticizer.
And then some saying just lookat yourself and recalibrate and
go, like, well, I am okay,because often their voice is a
(35:50):
reflection of your inner voicein you.
And our inner critiques would besometimes you'd hear your mom
saying something, sometimes youhear your dad saying something,
your teachers, but look at thosevoices, heal those voices, don't
run away from that, but healthose inner parts of you.
A lot of times when you startdoing this work, um, you know,
(36:12):
maybe with a criticizing person,when you start loving those
parts in you, um the shiftreally happens.
And it's very, it's very quickas well.
It's very interesting as well.
Like I looked at one person, andwhen we were looking at why his
(36:37):
life was usually very dramatic,you know, things would um just
keep happening in his life.
Sometimes a fence would falldown, sometimes there would be
something with the X.
Like it was just dramatic, as ina movie, just dramatic.
And he was like, why is it sodramatic?
And I looked at his inner part,and part of it was that he had
(36:57):
this inner warrior.
So there was a previous lifetimewhere he'd been a warrior, he'd
gone out and he'd done a lot ofthings.
Um, and his victories werealways celebrated because where
other people could not go, hecould go there and he could
conquer those lands.
That part still stayed in him,and he still wanted those
(37:19):
laurels, he still wanted thosemedals.
So there was still this partwhich was bringing to reality
all the drama in his life,because that part would feel,
oh, okay, now I've won, now I'vedone this.
But that's part of you, that'syour energy that's acting up
like that.
Once you go and heal that bit,so when we worked with him, we
(37:42):
healed the inner warrior, notshoving it away, but just
holding it and telling it thatlook, this is this lifetime,
this is how I want it to be, andgiving them something else to
do.
So your inner sabotage person,your inner child, your inner
victim, your inner perpetratorsometimes when we are trying to
(38:05):
control someone, all differentinner archetypes of us, you can
always give them different tasksto do if something's not serving
you well.
Like in this case, this warriorhe loved to celebrate.
So we said, Well, why don't youlook out opportunities for us
where we would like to grow,maybe we would like to expand.
And we gave this part that job.
(38:27):
If you feel like you have aninternal voice in you that is
always sabotaging you, tellingyou why you cannot do comedy,
why you cannot do your podcast,why you cannot write your book,
why you cannot do the projectthat you want to do, give talk
to that part, heal that part,bring that to yourself and say,
Well, why don't you show me howI can do this?
(38:48):
Tell me skills where I will begood.
Talk to them instead of runningaway from them.
Talk to them, connect with thatpart of yourself.
SPEAKER_03 (38:57):
Yeah, I like that.
I am one of those people thathas the sabotage thing going on.
So very relevant.
So you've mentioned working withpeople.
Do you want to talk how peoplecan reach you to work with you
or like how to your website orwhatever you want to share
social media?
SPEAKER_01 (39:13):
Yes, absolutely.
So I am Kaneka Energy Coach.
Kaneka is K-A-N-I-K-A.
You can find me on Instagram atKaneka Energy Coach, you can
find me on LinkedIn at KanekaEnergy Coach, and I'm always
happy to answer questions.
If you come to my website,artoflifecenter.com slash call,
that's where you can book aclarity call with me.
(39:37):
Because whenever I work with aclient, I don't just start like
you come into a program or youdo this.
I always like to see where youare at, what's really going on
in your life, and then offer yousuggestions that way.
I'll meet you where you are at.
So in this call, we'll talkabout what's really going on
behind the scenes for you withwhatever is happening in your
(40:01):
relationship, in your personallife.
And I love helping peopleexpand, expand into more
visibility, expand into moreauthentic relationships, become
more visible with theirbusinesses, get the next
promotion, like whatever thatexpansion means to you.
I love helping you on thatjourney.
So you can find me atartoflifecenter.com/slash call.
(40:21):
Um, yeah.
And then there are lots offreebies on the website as well.
There's one around soulcontracts as well, if people are
interested.
Yeah, I'll let you explore.
SPEAKER_03 (40:31):
Okay.
Yeah, thank you very much.
Yeah, and then if do you haveany like final thoughts or kind
of closing comments now that weknow how to reach you?
SPEAKER_01 (40:40):
Yeah, thank you.
I usually just tune into thegroup of people who are going to
listen to it.
And just see what is somethingthat they would like to hear
that we haven't really shared inthis episode so far.
Okay, a bigger question that'scoming up is that we've talked
(41:02):
around the healing.
We've talked that this is whatyou can do, and they're like,
well, I'm feeling stuck, and Idon't really know what to do to
feel peaceful and where do Istart?
What is the practical thing thatI can do to get there?
(41:23):
All right, so I'm just gonnagive you a little hack.
If you're driving, I'd ask youto maybe just stop driving or
pull your car over.
But just take a few minutes tobe and settle yourself in a
place where your activeconsciousness is not required
where you can close your eyes.
SPEAKER_00 (41:48):
And then as you sit down, you settle in, just take a
nice deep breath.
Let it really go into your spaceand exhale out.
And then take another breath.
(42:08):
Deeper breath.
And in this breath, I want youto connect with the universe
around you.
SPEAKER_01 (42:19):
Like feel that there is this universe, the divine,
the source around you.
Just breathe that consciousnessinto you.
SPEAKER_00 (42:32):
Bring it in.
SPEAKER_01 (42:35):
This is your guidance, this is your love,
this is your support, this isyour inner compass, this is all
that you seek, this is yourtruth, this is your light.
SPEAKER_00 (42:46):
So bring it in because it wants to come to you.
Bring it in and let it push outall the heaviness and all the
debris that keeps you stuck.
Just let more and more light in.
(43:15):
And now out here in this space.
Just in front of your mind'seye.
I want you to ask, what is mynext step?
What am I supposed to do?
And I know you've got aquestion.
I know there's something you'reseeking an answer to.
(43:41):
And ask them to show you that ifyou do this, what happens?
SPEAKER_01 (43:48):
Like, is the yes stronger for you?
Is the no stronger for you?
You'll notice there's one lightthat's grow glowing.
So you ask your question, can Ido this?
Is this what I should do?
See the yes, see the no.
SPEAKER_00 (44:04):
See which one lights up for you.
And maybe this is the answerthat you wanted.
Maybe this is not the answerthat you wanted.
And that's okay.
Now step into the yes just tosee what it feels like.
How your body feels like.
(44:25):
And you can come out.
SPEAKER_01 (44:30):
And imagine you're getting a little cleansing.
Maybe there's a shower therethat just cleans you.
And now walk into the no bit.
SPEAKER_00 (44:40):
The no door.
And just see what that feelslike.
And then come out.
SPEAKER_01 (44:57):
And so whatever question you had in your mind,
whether you should go a certainway, whether you should not go a
certain way, now you have a lotmore clear guidance around that.
SPEAKER_00 (45:16):
And I wish you the courage.
I pass you love and light to beable to live with that.
To be able to honor your truestpurpose.
SPEAKER_01 (45:29):
Just soak in more of the breath, soak in more of the
consciousness.
Really let it filter throughyou, especially if your answer
is something that you didn'twant to hear.
Just soak in more of thatgoodness, more of the truth,
more of the light.
Bring that into you.
(45:49):
Because that brings the courage,that brings the guidance, that
brings all the support that youneed.
Bring that in into you.
Don't disconnect yourself fromtruth and light.
Connect yourself to truth andlight.
SPEAKER_00 (46:03):
Bring it in.
SPEAKER_01 (46:06):
And if you need more support, you tell them that hey,
I need more support.
I need you to flee to flow a lotmore through me.
SPEAKER_00 (46:15):
And so it is.
So it is.
SPEAKER_01 (46:18):
So anytime when you need an energy top-up, this is
what you do, and this is how yougo on your path.
And then when you're ready, youcan go ahead and open your eyes.
So that was something reallyquick.
I couldn't do it as long becauseit really hadn't set up the
(46:40):
scene for a meditation.
But if you're wanting to havemore guided meditations, I've
got full guided meditations onmy website.
They can be found atartoflifecenter.com slash free.
That is where you'll find a lotof my freebies, and underneath
you'll find all the guidedmeditations there as well.
Based on whatever you'reseeking, there's um there are
(47:02):
meditations on getting overtoxic relationships, on just
moving on, healing yourrelationships for your mom and
dad, because they can be thefounding blocks of how you're
attracting other people intoyour life as well.
SPEAKER_03 (47:16):
Yeah, definitely.
All right.
Well, thank you very much forthat.
And be sure to check out herwebsite and her social media
handles.
And if you love this episode, besure to tell your friends about
it and rate it as well.
And thank you for joining me,Kanika.
SPEAKER_01 (47:32):
Thanks a lot, Tamara.
It's been such a pleasure.
SPEAKER_03 (47:35):
Yes, thank you very much.
And thanks everyone.
All right, see you next time ortalk to you next time.
All right, bye.
Welcome to the Straight From the Source's Mouth
Podcast.
Frank talk about sex and dating.
Hello, Tamra here.
Welcome to the show.
Today's guest is KanikaVastudeva, an energy coach and
Akashic Records reader.
And we'll be talking about howthese apply to our sex lives.
Thanks for joining me, Kanika.
SPEAKER_01 (00:18):
Thank you so much for having me here tomorrow.
I'm so excited.
SPEAKER_03 (00:21):
Yes, me too.
I have not heard of this KashikReaders or Energy Healing.
I've heard of energy healing abit, but I think this is a
different take.
So I'm excited to hear what youhave to share about it.
SPEAKER_01 (00:31):
Yeah, so Akashic Records are like the mystical
library that actually surroundsall of earth.
And they have information aboutall of us, like all the
information.
Information in this lifetime andinformation in the past
lifetimes, all our connections,everything.
(00:52):
So whether it's energy healingor anything else, people are
always pulling up informationfrom the Kashik records because
that's the central library.
Unknown to them.
SPEAKER_03 (01:03):
Yeah.
I've never heard of it calledlike quite like that.
But yeah, I mean it makes sense.
Like that's what they say.
Some people say that, you know,like is it fate or is it free
will and all that stuff?
Or you know, like, is it kind oflike that, or is it a little
different than those two areas?
SPEAKER_01 (01:19):
I love the question, and I think you're hitting the
ground running.
Um, yes, so we are co-creators,we have free will, but there's
also destiny and there's alsouniversal flow at place.
Maybe I'll start by talking alittle bit about myself and the
work that I do now.
Um, I never wanted to do this.
(01:39):
You know, I grew up as anengineer, then I became an MBA
professional.
I was a project manager workingfor really large corporations,
doing projects, multi-milliondollar projects around the
globe.
And energy coaching or tuninginto Akashic Records is really
never what I had in mind.
(02:00):
I think I was somewhere in mymid-30s.
So that time my Facebook lifelooked really good.
My LinkedIn life looked good.
If you would look at it, youwould see, you know, great stuff
that was going on, except thatinside I was feeling really
empty.
I wasn't in the happiestmarriage.
And I was a mom to a two and ahalf year old almost.
(02:22):
I was trying to understand myspace there because there were
just things happening and I wasunderstanding my identity.
I think this happens a lot withwomen.
When kids get born and suddenlyyour life gets turned, you're
like, okay, who am I now?
You have kids who need you alot.
You've got your family who needsyou a lot.
(02:43):
And you're like, Well, I'm thisnew person, you know.
I had associated my worth withmy output, with my work, with my
salary as well, and theaccomplishments that I was
making there.
And so this was newfoundterritory.
And I was also pregnant with mydaughter at the time.
(03:04):
And this was this weirdjuxtaposition going on with me
at that time because I knew Iwas pregnant with a daughter,
and as excited as I was to haveher, I was also reflecting at my
own life and thinking, gosh, I'mnot happy.
I've done the so-called rightthings, and I'm not really happy
(03:28):
with my life.
And what am I going to give toher?
How is she going to be happy?
And then one day I woke up, Ijust never felt her move in my
tummy, in my belly, and um wentto the doctor, realized that
there was no heartbeat, I had togive birth to a stillborn.
(03:52):
And that was a terrible moment.
That was also a very gracefulmoment.
Because before this, whateverwas happening in my life, I
could numb it, I could pack itaway and not look at it.
Now it was very different.
(04:12):
I was with her, I had her in me,and then I didn't have her.
The house reminded me of herthings because we were preparing
for her arrival.
The bassinet was there, thenursery room was there,
everything because she was 31weeks.
Um and I was suffering withguilt and shame.
(04:35):
That A, I'd not connected withher as much.
I also wanted to know as a momwhether she was okay or not.
I really wanted to find out whathappened and why she didn't come
into life.
So that started my whole journeyinto energy healing.
It wasn't a conscious choice,but I'm giving this example in
the sense that we all havecertain destiny points.
(04:56):
So, yes, there's a co-creator inus, in the sense that every
single moment we can do whateverwe want to do.
And based on that, the next lifesteps will show up.
But if I have a destiny, thereason why I took birth came as
a soul in this physical body,then there was a purpose that
(05:20):
set out.
And my soul is going to try anddo that again and again, bring
me back to that, keep bringingme to this lesson.
So for me, it was yes, I gotinto energy healing, I got into
Vakashic Records then andunderstood or started
(05:41):
understanding my relationship,how I'm a much smaller piece,
how there's a much bigger piecearound the universe, um, destiny
as well.
That all started making sense.
And by the way, with mydaughter, when I connected with
her, and I asked her, you know,why did you not come into my
life?
And she said, Well, you told methat you did not want to waste
(06:04):
this lifetime.
So I actually had an agreementwith her that if I was wasting
this lifetime, that she wouldcome and she would wake me up,
which she did.
So it sounds like a reallyterrible moment, but it actually
was, I think, life's biggestmoment of grace.
And that's what I'd like toleave the listeners with as
(06:25):
well.
That wherever you feel that yourlife's really hard, that you
just cannot go through it, Iwant to tell you, because I've
seen this over and over with allmy clients as well, that this is
where light wants to enterthrough you.
You're not being punished,you're being loved because
(06:46):
you're being driven to yourhigher purpose, you're driven to
your destiny.
Now it's up to you whether youtake the first knock.
Like, you know, life is tellingme, hey, there's something
wrong.
I was feeling unhappy.
So life will give you thosesigns, and then life will just
make it a little bit bigger andbigger to make sure that you go
on your destiny.
SPEAKER_03 (07:08):
Yeah.
Yeah, I know Oprah talks aboutthat too.
Like, first it's like a whisperand then a knock upside the head
and then a brick wall.
At least you, you know, eachtime it gets a little more like
obvious where you really aresupposed to listen.
SPEAKER_01 (07:21):
So yeah, absolutely.
And um, that's what happens alot of times, the coincidences
or the little things that we'rethinking, that is just life's
way of telling you that, hey,listen to this, listen to this,
listen to this.
Often the disalignment that wefeel, the disengagement, and we
start getting used to it.
And I would encourage you not toget used to it, because that is
(07:45):
where light's trying to come in.
Also, if you don't listen towhat you're really supposed to
do, like in some sense, you arecompromising, you know, you are
accepting a relationship becauseit's not too bad, it's a little
bit bad, you're not doing yoursoul's calling because it's sort
(08:05):
of okay to continue on with yourjob, even though it's not
inspiring.
Take the baby steps that you'resupposed to take.
Because if it's on your path, ifthat is what your soul's decided
to do, that needs to happen,whether in this lifetime,
whether in another lifetime, itdoesn't go away.
SPEAKER_03 (08:25):
Yeah.
I mean, it's totally it's notthat related, but I was always
felt drawn to doing stand-upcomedy.
And I was doing it before Istarted my podcast.
I was like, it was scared me todeath, but I couldn't like ever
stop from thinking about doingit.
And I did it for three years.
And now I feel like I did itlike I said I would, and I did
it, and now I've transitioned tothe podcast, and then we'll see
(08:47):
what's next.
SPEAKER_01 (08:48):
But yeah, so I mean maybe not as.
And that's a good story ofcourage, you know.
People don't go out and dothings like that, they don't
really follow the music in theirheart, but you really should.
Um, there's nothing like, well,you're in your 30s or 40s or 50s
and you can't do this.
Actually, give yourself theexample, give yourself the
liberty to do that.
(09:09):
Don't waste life.
There is a lot of competition tocome to life as souls, to be
born here, to come here.
There's a lot of preparationthat goes on.
Don't waste this.
And also give people around youan example.
You know, we always feel there'sthe sabotage in our person in
us.
(09:29):
There's also sometimes a childthat wants to feel just safe,
just loved, taken care of.
So we are not wanting to rufflethe feathers, so to speak.
How things are, we want to keepthem the way they are.
SPEAKER_02 (09:44):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (09:45):
But if everybody did that, humanity would just not
evolve.
You came here with your uniquemix of your light, your gifts,
your talent, your exploration,your ideas, bring them out,
share them in the world.
That's how you make humanity abetter place.
That's how you inspire otherpeople to do their dreams as
well.
So I'm really, really proud ofyou that you went and you did
(10:07):
your stand-up comedy becauseyou've inspired others.
You've inspired your family atleast.
You've inspired people who'veseen you, that you can go out
there and you can do what yourart calls you to do.
SPEAKER_03 (10:20):
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
And I had lots of friends watchon YouTube too, as I posted it.
So yeah.
Yeah, a lot of people.
Yeah, they and I I definitely,and even this podcast too.
Like I just I agreewholeheartedly that people,
there's always everyone hassomething they're thinking about
or really secretly want to do.
And like you said, they shouldjust get out there and take the
baby steps to do towards that.
SPEAKER_01 (10:43):
I think we're afraid that we feel there's no plan.
We feel like, oh, this is what Iwant to do, but I don't really
know the next steps.
But the idea is you're notsupposed to know the next steps.
And here's the thing (10:57):
we think, including myself, long time ago,
I used to think that I'm theperson in charge of my life.
Um, with my daughter, she wasn'teven born.
I was planning out things forher as an example.
I was planning out her clothes,I was planning out her room.
(11:18):
Because I, being the projectmanager, you know, I was
managing, looking after thesituation.
We are not the drivers, we'rethe co-drivers, we're the
co-creators.
Universe has a plan.
And that is the bigger flow.
Like if I think of myself and mysize, I'm a teeny and maybe even
smaller than that compared tothe whole universe.
(11:41):
And yet, I'm putting all thecontrols in place, or I'm
saying, well, I need to see thenext road before I take that
step, because it soundsoutrageous in the human minds.
But if we would just allow thatconnection, if we could just
tune into the universe and trustthat it's looking after us, that
(12:02):
there is a plan that we will beheld, things start becoming a
lot easier.
Often we want to see, and yourreal gifts, the real shine that
you're supposed to have, theywill be a little bit outrageous.
You know, when you share themwith people, they will be like,
What are you talking about?
Nobody's gonna back you forthis.
You know, the first time whenyou went out and you said, Oh,
(12:22):
I'm gonna do my stand-up comedy,somebody would have said, Are
you out of your mind?
unknown (12:27):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_03 (12:45):
Yeah, yeah, I definitely had people like
afraid for me, kind of thing.
SPEAKER_01 (12:52):
Because it sounds so unfeasible to them in the human
mind, but when we let go ofthat, when we let go, I would
say it's a fact that we are justhuman beings, we are souls in
bodies.
So if we let go of controllingwith our little human mind that
(13:14):
I've got to control the outcome,if we surrender, we'll find that
life's a lot bigger.
You know, sometimes we act likelittle kids.
So when you've got a child,maybe two years old, and you're
taking them out of theplayground, and the child
doesn't want to come out, and hescreams and throws a tantrum
because it's like the end of theworld, and maybe the
(13:35):
playground's never gonna happenagain.
And of course, as a parent or acaretaker, you know that you
will bring them back to theplayground, it's not the end of
the world.
But we act like that all thetime with the universe.
Universe shows us some signs,tells us this is what you were
supposed to do, and we're like,mm-mm, no, no, no, no, no.
And then the funny bit, we stillend up blaming the universe or
(13:57):
life, whatever term we want toput to it.
We still end up blaming thatbecause you're not giving me the
right steps.
I'm asking you for guidance,you're not showing me, and the
universe is going like, I amshowing you, I am giving you the
inspiration.
Take the step.
SPEAKER_03 (14:11):
Yeah, yeah, definitely.
And since this is a podcastabout dating and relationships,
do you think I'm guessing youwould imagine this goes into the
same thing, like pickingpartners and being with people?
Like, is there are there do youthink it's a fate destiny kind
of thing for people you end upwith or a plan like that, or is
that more would you say it fallsunder the same thing?
SPEAKER_01 (14:35):
I think we are co-creators, especially our key
relationships.
That would be our mom, our dad,that would be the people we meet
um sexually as well, or our mainrelationships at least.
They are all pre-agreed.
Soul contracts, we all havethem.
(14:57):
Before we come in, we choose ourparents and we choose them for
things that we want to learn andevolve and grow with.
So they're carefully chosen.
Um, our key relationships,they're all carefully chosen as
well.
But having said that, we areco-creators.
So, the reason for all thesecontracts is that there are
(15:20):
certain lessons we're supposedto learn.
For example, in my case, it hasbeen this journey of really
understanding myself, owning mytruth, and then speaking my
truth a lot more.
So I've had parents who'vebought that out for me.
I've had relationshipsrepeatedly who've bought that
(15:40):
out for me.
And I was very much a peoplepleaser without even knowing it.
I think it still runs in somevery deep level of me, where I
just change myself, I become soflexible and change according to
the other person.
(16:01):
And because my sole purpose isto get more aware of myself,
that's why the relationshipsbring that out.
That often the more I becomeflexible, it's like, well,
actually, you were not supposedto do that.
You were supposed to stay inyour truth.
Same way, we'll all have certainlessons that we're all supposed
(16:22):
to learn.
So your relationships willfollow whatever you're supposed
to learn.
Some lessons, if you reallylearned them, then the contracts
that you would have withrelationships.
Let's say if you're having,maybe as an example, a toxic
relationship.
And if you're supposed to havethat so that you can understand
(16:46):
a lot more about betrayal andthen coming back to your center.
But if you've already startedunderstanding that, then the
next levels of that, they arenullified.
Um, let me explain it this way.
Um, how it works is you'resupposed to go, as an example,
(17:06):
from a level one to a levelhundred in certain lessons.
And let's say you start at one,the soul will meet you at one,
it'll give you opportunities atone, and it's not like the
physical world where we justhave plan A, plan B, plan C.
The universe has lots of plansthere, depending on where you're
vibrating and what you'relearning.
And it gives you opportunitiesbased on that.
(17:27):
Now let's say you go all the wayfrom one to five.
So in between, all that two tofour, you don't have to do that
anymore.
Now you're at five and it willmeet you there.
So all our soul contracts, allour relationships, they're
written in that sense, but wemight bypass some things.
Also, some of these contracts,some of the relationships that
(17:49):
we have, they might be based oncertain old programming or old
karmas.
Doesn't mean they can be notrewritten, but sometimes they
can be operating out of oldthings.
So examples here would be let'ssay a mom who for one reason um
(18:11):
had a miscarriage, and thenshe's really afraid of just
childbirth because of how thingstranspired for her, and she
might still be carrying thatmemory into her.
If you have lied in a particularlifetime around something, maybe
(18:32):
lied about something reallymajor with your husband or so
on, you might still be carryingthat impact, bringing that into
this lifetime.
But if you learn those truths,if you understand that the
miscarriage was at that time,you break the contract, then
(18:53):
that lady, and I've seen that,where my client just became
okay.
Initially, there was a pointwhere whenever anyone talked
about having babies, there wassomething in her body that just
froze.
Whereas after the reading, itwas like unhealing, it was okay.
Like, okay, now I can thinkabout babies because initially
(19:15):
she was thinking of babies andher body was freezing because it
was remembering the the passingaway.
It was remembering the pain withthat.
So that had been eased, cleaned,and the body just has a new
operating system.
For the lady who'd spoken liesabout certain really important
(19:36):
things.
When she moved and when sheunderstood that, oh, she's
supposed to speak more with hertruth, then the world opened up
for her as well.
Um, and she started getting moreopportunities, etc.
So our contracts are written ata particular time, but when you
(19:57):
clean them, they change yourrelationships.
If you're attracting toxicrelationships, and you've got to
ask this, right?
In the physical world, yes,person A was at fault because
there was something wrong withthem, person B was at fault,
there was something wrong withthem, person C was at fault.
That's fine.
I hear you, I totally get it.
I've been that person.
(20:18):
But at one stage you've got toask, well, why are they all with
you?
Why did you get them in thefirst place?
unknown (20:25):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (20:26):
What's running on inside you?
When I looked at that for me,there was a lot of healing that
you that I wanted to do, Ineeded to do inside me.
Often, if you're attractingtoxic relationships, look at
what is your pattern and startwith, well, what am I not
learning here?
(20:47):
Because that's the whole point.
Your soul's just trying to getyou to learn something.
What are you not learning?
Are you not standing up foryourself?
Are you not seeing the signs?
What is it?
And tune into that, not runningaway from it, but tuning into it
more.
And then once you've cleared thepatterns, you'll notice that
(21:08):
your relationships show up in alot different way as well.
SPEAKER_03 (21:12):
Yeah, yeah, definitely believe that.
I always I I've told uh otherpeople, but yeah, like th
there's a 10-year period wherethere's three different, I call
them the drunks, you know, thenvarying stages of like alcoholic
or functional alcoholic as oneliked to call himself.
Yeah, and then I took then Idated dated for the first time
(21:32):
for a few years, and then nowI'm like with someone that's
much better, like a nicer andall the good things.
But yeah, I had after taking abreak.
SPEAKER_01 (21:41):
And that's because you worked on yourself.
I took a six-month break.
And that's because you'vecleansed, you've come from that
really whole place.
SPEAKER_03 (21:48):
Yeah, so I definitely agree with what
you're saying.
I can see where it's good toknow that you can learn it and
you don't have to keep learningit.
Like once like you're onceyou've crossed that, you know,
check that box, like, okay,yeah, I understand this now.
I don't have to get that lessonanymore.
SPEAKER_01 (22:02):
You know, in about seven years, all the cells in
our body, they would haveregenerated, they would have
become new cells.
So we are constantlyre-evolving, we are constantly
growing.
Hence, that is an opportunity toconsider that we can let go and
we can really change our lives.
Whatever you are brought into,whatever paradigms you're
(22:24):
brought into, especially you'vetalked about abuse, whether that
is um alcohol, whether that isother sorts of abuse.
If you're coming to that, yourpast does not have to dictate
your future.
You have the free will, youalways have the free will to
break away from that, but you'vereally got to claim it on it and
(22:46):
go like, okay, I am changing mystory.
And again, coming back to theconnection, when you actually
connect with the universe, God,source, whatever you want to
call the divine, when youconnect with that connection and
when you really call in thatintent very strongly and say,
This is where I want to stand inand help me, help me break the
(23:10):
cycle of abuse, help me breakthe cycle of alcoholism,
whatever it is that isstruggling, that is paining you
in this lifetime, even if it ishard work, even if it is
repetitive chores, do that andyou will notice that you will
get that help.
But first ask that and claim itfor yourself because that is
your free will.
(23:30):
We have free will in the sensethat whatever we want to do in
our life, we can.
We can still make whateverchoices the source gives to us,
we can still choose whatever Iwant to do.
So it is still our playground.
And it is up to you to claim,okay, I don't want those limits
(23:52):
anymore.
I'm not going to operate out ofmy old story.
SPEAKER_03 (23:55):
Yeah.
Yeah.
I've had other guests before,it's just because you get kind
of stuck because it's likecomfortable enough.
So you just stay there and youdon't even know there's
something better because you'relike, it's good enough kind of
thing.
So yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (24:08):
And then it's the disalignment that we've got to
really understand.
Um, that oh, when you're feelingdisaligned, when you're feeling
unhappy, there is somethingwrong.
At a vast human scale, there isan agreement that, oh, as we get
(24:29):
older, as we get in the 30s, aswe get in the forties, as we get
in the 50s, you know, thehappiness in life is supposed to
go down.
And if that's happening for you,I want you to go out and just
watch some kids, even if youdon't have them in your house,
go to a playground, just watchkids playing, just watch kids
doing things.
This is how you came in.
They know how to be happy.
(24:50):
They'll be happy looking at astone, they'll be happy climbing
on slides, they will actuallynot run off out of ideas, they
will speak so much, which is whyparents will often say, Ah, he
doesn't stop.
But you came with that.
You came with that zeal of life,you came with that curiosity,
that creativity.
Where did all of that go?
If that life force has stoppedin you, and that's very much a
(25:13):
sacral thing, so that's verymuch the second chakra, the
chakra around sex emotions,that's because you've bottled up
your emotions, you've bottled upstuff that's in there and you've
not let it out.
You have instead of it being ahealthy functioning chakra, it's
become that place which is justsmelly and not feeling good at
(25:37):
all.
Your sacral chakra is the centerof sex at the same time.
Sex is, you know, it it um wethink of it as just sex.
SPEAKER_00 (25:50):
Whereas sex is how life starts.
SPEAKER_01 (25:59):
It's creativity, it is making everything in the
universe, every baby is amiracle.
So every time when you get intothat act, it is it can be
thought of as sex, it can justbe really tinied into that
definition, but it's a lot moreexpansive and a lot more
(26:25):
conscious vibration if you allowthat to be as well.
So when you really tapped in toyour second chakra, that time
you're really tuned in into theflow, natural flow of the
universe.
You really know what's going tohappen, you're in alignment,
your creative juices, they'reall flowing out because this
(26:47):
center is not just aboutbirthing babies, it's also about
birthing new ideas, projects,everything that you want to do
in life, that all starts here.
The birthplace is here, and ourhuman bodies, female human
bodies, they have the uterus,they have the whole reproductive
organs to be able to make ababy, but the same place is also
(27:11):
connected with the breath, withthe rhythm, with the birthplace
of the universe.
I think of the womb, not as justthe womb, but it's also the womb
portal of the universe.
You know, think of the womb assuch.
You'll see it's dark when youthink about it, it's a nice dark
(27:33):
place.
And now look at any picturesthat you would have seen of
space, and you would see thestars, the brightest of the
stars, and they are held in thatshimmery darkish purple place.
(27:54):
That is void, that is thebirthplace where all the stars,
where all the galaxies,everything in the universe and
all the multi-universes, theyall get born in that place.
And this is where your womb,especially for females,
obviously, that's connected to.
So your womb, your place is alot more sacred.
(28:17):
And hence, whatever happens inour lives sexually, can either
feel really violating at adeeply personal level, or it can
feel really deprivating.
Again, it's it's not small, youknow.
Everything that we feel isreally magnified here because
this is a potential force thatyou're correct connecting to.
SPEAKER_03 (28:39):
Yeah, I've never heard it quite that way, but
yeah, I like the sexual healing.
I know you talk about that alittle bit with like old
emotional patterns and thechakra, I'm guessing, is part of
that, or is it like explain moreabout that?
SPEAKER_01 (28:54):
Okay, around the emotional healing or around the
sexual healing.
Clients will come with sometimesthe addiction issues that they
have, or um they'll feel somesort of sexual chemistry
incompatibility with theirpartners.
And that's a symptom.
(29:16):
Your body is always talking toyou, your body is always going
to give you signals that this isnot happening.
Like you might feel thirsty, youmight feel pain in some area,
you will feel, ah, this is notgoing well.
So that's how the body istalking, you know, when you are
interacting with someone else,especially in something as
(29:37):
deeply intimate as sexualintercourse, or just even
whatever you're doing in bed,even if you're not really going
to the full rhythms, but it's avery intimate moment.
Lots of things are happeningthere.
But before I go on to the secondchakra, which is the center for
all of that, let's start withthe root chakra.
Root chakra is just a little bitabove, or it's the tailbone, so
(30:02):
it's right where you're sitting,it's the tip of the tailbone.
Um, root chakra is where we'reall coming out from.
This is our center of belonging.
This is whether we feel okay ornot.
And I'm talking about the rootchakra because as we go up in
the body, wherever you need tofeel a connection, it needs to
(30:25):
if you want to feel complete inthat connection at that level,
you'll first need to also feelcomplete in the connections at
the level below.
So if you're wanting to feelreally good with someone
sexually, it has to start withyou also feeling good with them
(30:47):
physically.
In the first chakra, firstchakra is around belonging.
So how do you feel with theperson?
Do you feel seen, heard?
You know, think of it in termsof the roots.
The tree needs roots to feelstable, to feel like you are
okay.
So do you feel like you can justbe them?
(31:09):
You're not judged because of howyour body looks, how big your
bank account is, and so on, butyou can just be.
So often, if you're feelingthat, oh, I'm not able to do it
with someone else, start withyourself first.
Start with being comfortable inyour own body.
(31:30):
Start with just looking atyourself in the mirror and
complimenting yourself,acknowledging your body.
Start by becoming your bestfriend, not criticizing yourself
in your self-talks that you gotlate for something, that you
didn't do something right.
But just start by bringing thatbelonging to yourself.
(31:53):
Once you start that, then you goon to the next place, which is
the second chakra.
This would be the sexual chakra.
This is also the place ofemotion.
This is also the place ofcreativity.
Then it's it is very, verydeeply um personal.
It's very deep within all of us.
(32:14):
You know, this is where lifestarts for all of us.
This is where we were conceived.
This is where all our Jews oflife lives, whatever we're going
to do in life.
So it's a very intimate space.
Even before it gets physicalwith anyone else, it's just a
very, very intimate space.
So to be here, you want to feelcomfortable in terms of
(32:37):
expressing your emotions.
You want to feel comfortable injust being how you are.
And I would say start withyourself because often we start
looking at everything theopposite way.
We put the onus on someone else.
Do they love me?
Do they like me?
Does he appreciate me or doesshe appreciate me?
(33:00):
But start first with yourself.
You're aligning with theuniverse, right?
That's the main rhythm ofeverything.
You're aligning with theuniversal flow.
So start by loving yourself,start by validating your own
emotions, start by understandingthat that's your inner compass.
So that no matter who you arewith, you are still looking and
(33:22):
hearing what they're saying.
But you've got your innercompass to understand.
Well, they said I was too loud,but was I really, was I okay or
not?
Your inner compass, your innerknowingness should be a lot
deeper than that.
Otherwise, you're gonna startfeeling hurt.
Does that make sense?
Do you have questions here?
SPEAKER_03 (33:42):
Yeah, I know.
I think I yeah, I get it.
Okay.
No, I mean it's definitely theunknown thing to like internal.
So you're the one that'sconnected, obviously.
So you know yourself best, andyou can don't have to agree with
what others say or think aboutyou.
SPEAKER_01 (34:00):
Yeah, like I had this funny story um that they
used to tell us sometimes when Iwas growing up.
There was this guy um long timeago in a village, and he had a
donkey.
And so the donkey was not doingreally well, but he's like
taking him somewhere.
And then as he's walking withthe donkey, some people started
(34:23):
laughing at him that come on,this guy's got a donkey, and you
know, he's not sitting on top ofthe donkey.
Like, what an idiot he is,because he's walking next to the
donkey.
So he said, Okay, you know, I'llsit next to the donkey.
Uh, on the donkey.
So he sat on the donkey and he'swalking, and now some people
they're looking at him andthey're like, doesn't this
(34:43):
person understand the donkey isnot doing well, and yet he's
sitting on top of him?
So then he gets down and uh umand he ends up the story, it's
just hilarious, but it's justsupposed to make us understand
how we can just never be rightif we continue looking at
(35:07):
everyone outside and continuetrying to do what they want us
to do because they're differentpeople, they have different
perspectives.
Like this guy ends up carryingthe donkey, like holding him
across his shoulders andcarrying him like that and does
all sorts of things, but there'snothing that he would do that
was ever right.
SPEAKER_03 (35:24):
Yeah, as soon as he heard someone say something, he
had to fix it.
Yeah, next thing.
SPEAKER_01 (35:29):
Yeah, but it happens a lot with all of us as well,
where we look at someone else,we see, hey, you know, this is
what you did not do, and itreally brings us that, oh, I did
not do that.
We become the biggestcriticizer.
And then some saying just lookat yourself and recalibrate and
go, like, well, I am okay,because often their voice is a
(35:50):
reflection of your inner voicein you.
And our inner critiques would besometimes you'd hear your mom
saying something, sometimes youhear your dad saying something,
your teachers, but look at thosevoices, heal those voices, don't
run away from that, but healthose inner parts of you.
A lot of times when you startdoing this work, um, you know,
(36:12):
maybe with a criticizing person,when you start loving those
parts in you, um the shiftreally happens.
And it's very, it's very quickas well.
It's very interesting as well.
Like I looked at one person, andwhen we were looking at why his
(36:37):
life was usually very dramatic,you know, things would um just
keep happening in his life.
Sometimes a fence would falldown, sometimes there would be
something with the X.
Like it was just dramatic, as ina movie, just dramatic.
And he was like, why is it sodramatic?
And I looked at his inner part,and part of it was that he had
(36:57):
this inner warrior.
So there was a previous lifetimewhere he'd been a warrior, he'd
gone out and he'd done a lot ofthings.
Um, and his victories werealways celebrated because where
other people could not go, hecould go there and he could
conquer those lands.
That part still stayed in him,and he still wanted those
(37:19):
laurels, he still wanted thosemedals.
So there was still this partwhich was bringing to reality
all the drama in his life,because that part would feel,
oh, okay, now I've won, now I'vedone this.
But that's part of you, that'syour energy that's acting up
like that.
Once you go and heal that bit,so when we worked with him, we
(37:42):
healed the inner warrior, notshoving it away, but just
holding it and telling it thatlook, this is this lifetime,
this is how I want it to be, andgiving them something else to
do.
So your inner sabotage person,your inner child, your inner
victim, your inner perpetratorsometimes when we are trying to
(38:05):
control someone, all differentinner archetypes of us, you can
always give them different tasksto do if something's not serving
you well.
Like in this case, this warriorhe loved to celebrate.
So we said, Well, why don't youlook out opportunities for us
where we would like to grow,maybe we would like to expand.
And we gave this part that job.
(38:27):
If you feel like you have aninternal voice in you that is
always sabotaging you, tellingyou why you cannot do comedy,
why you cannot do your podcast,why you cannot write your book,
why you cannot do the projectthat you want to do, give talk
to that part, heal that part,bring that to yourself and say,
Well, why don't you show me howI can do this?
(38:48):
Tell me skills where I will begood.
Talk to them instead of runningaway from them.
Talk to them, connect with thatpart of yourself.
SPEAKER_03 (38:57):
Yeah, I like that.
I am one of those people thathas the sabotage thing going on.
So very relevant.
So you've mentioned working withpeople.
Do you want to talk how peoplecan reach you to work with you
or like how to your website orwhatever you want to share
social media?
SPEAKER_01 (39:13):
Yes, absolutely.
So I am Kaneka Energy Coach.
Kaneka is K-A-N-I-K-A.
You can find me on Instagram atKaneka Energy Coach, you can
find me on LinkedIn at KanekaEnergy Coach, and I'm always
happy to answer questions.
If you come to my website,artoflifecenter.com slash call,
that's where you can book aclarity call with me.
(39:37):
Because whenever I work with aclient, I don't just start like
you come into a program or youdo this.
I always like to see where youare at, what's really going on
in your life, and then offer yousuggestions that way.
I'll meet you where you are at.
So in this call, we'll talkabout what's really going on
behind the scenes for you withwhatever is happening in your
(40:01):
relationship, in your personallife.
And I love helping peopleexpand, expand into more
visibility, expand into moreauthentic relationships, become
more visible with theirbusinesses, get the next
promotion, like whatever thatexpansion means to you.
I love helping you on thatjourney.
So you can find me atartoflifecenter.com/slash call.
(40:21):
Um, yeah.
And then there are lots offreebies on the website as well.
There's one around soulcontracts as well, if people are
interested.
Yeah, I'll let you explore.
SPEAKER_03 (40:31):
Okay.
Yeah, thank you very much.
Yeah, and then if do you haveany like final thoughts or kind
of closing comments now that weknow how to reach you?
SPEAKER_01 (40:40):
Yeah, thank you.
I usually just tune into thegroup of people who are going to
listen to it.
And just see what is somethingthat they would like to hear
that we haven't really shared inthis episode so far.
Okay, a bigger question that'scoming up is that we've talked
(41:02):
around the healing.
We've talked that this is whatyou can do, and they're like,
well, I'm feeling stuck, and Idon't really know what to do to
feel peaceful and where do Istart?
What is the practical thing thatI can do to get there?
(41:23):
All right, so I'm just gonnagive you a little hack.
If you're driving, I'd ask youto maybe just stop driving or
pull your car over.
But just take a few minutes tobe and settle yourself in a
place where your activeconsciousness is not required
where you can close your eyes.
SPEAKER_00 (41:48):
And then as you sit down, you settle in, just take a
nice deep breath.
Let it really go into your spaceand exhale out.
And then take another breath.
(42:08):
Deeper breath.
And in this breath, I want youto connect with the universe
around you.
SPEAKER_01 (42:19):
Like feel that there is this universe, the divine,
the source around you.
Just breathe that consciousnessinto you.
SPEAKER_00 (42:32):
Bring it in.
SPEAKER_01 (42:35):
This is your guidance, this is your love,
this is your support, this isyour inner compass, this is all
that you seek, this is yourtruth, this is your light.
SPEAKER_00 (42:46):
So bring it in because it wants to come to you.
Bring it in and let it push outall the heaviness and all the
debris that keeps you stuck.
Just let more and more light in.
(43:15):
And now out here in this space.
Just in front of your mind'seye.
I want you to ask, what is mynext step?
What am I supposed to do?
And I know you've got aquestion.
I know there's something you'reseeking an answer to.
(43:41):
And ask them to show you that ifyou do this, what happens?
SPEAKER_01 (43:48):
Like, is the yes stronger for you?
Is the no stronger for you?
You'll notice there's one lightthat's grow glowing.
So you ask your question, can Ido this?
Is this what I should do?
See the yes, see the no.
SPEAKER_00 (44:04):
See which one lights up for you.
And maybe this is the answerthat you wanted.
Maybe this is not the answerthat you wanted.
And that's okay.
Now step into the yes just tosee what it feels like.
How your body feels like.
(44:25):
And you can come out.
SPEAKER_01 (44:30):
And imagine you're getting a little cleansing.
Maybe there's a shower therethat just cleans you.
And now walk into the no bit.
SPEAKER_00 (44:40):
The no door.
And just see what that feelslike.
And then come out.
SPEAKER_01 (44:57):
And so whatever question you had in your mind,
whether you should go a certainway, whether you should not go a
certain way, now you have a lotmore clear guidance around that.
SPEAKER_00 (45:16):
And I wish you the courage.
I pass you love and light to beable to live with that.
To be able to honor your truestpurpose.
SPEAKER_01 (45:29):
Just soak in more of the breath, soak in more of the
consciousness.
Really let it filter throughyou, especially if your answer
is something that you didn'twant to hear.
Just soak in more of thatgoodness, more of the truth,
more of the light.
Bring that into you.
(45:49):
Because that brings the courage,that brings the guidance, that
brings all the support that youneed.
Bring that in into you.
Don't disconnect yourself fromtruth and light.
Connect yourself to truth andlight.
SPEAKER_00 (46:03):
Bring it in.
SPEAKER_01 (46:06):
And if you need more support, you tell them that hey,
I need more support.
I need you to flee to flow a lotmore through me.
SPEAKER_00 (46:15):
And so it is.
So it is.
SPEAKER_01 (46:18):
So anytime when you need an energy top-up, this is
what you do, and this is how yougo on your path.
And then when you're ready, youcan go ahead and open your eyes.
So that was something reallyquick.
I couldn't do it as long becauseit really hadn't set up the
(46:40):
scene for a meditation.
But if you're wanting to havemore guided meditations, I've
got full guided meditations onmy website.
They can be found atartoflifecenter.com slash free.
That is where you'll find a lotof my freebies, and underneath
you'll find all the guidedmeditations there as well.
Based on whatever you'reseeking, there's um there are
(47:02):
meditations on getting overtoxic relationships, on just
moving on, healing yourrelationships for your mom and
dad, because they can be thefounding blocks of how you're
attracting other people intoyour life as well.
SPEAKER_03 (47:16):
Yeah, definitely.
All right.
Well, thank you very much forthat.
And be sure to check out herwebsite and her social media
handles.
And if you love this episode, besure to tell your friends about
it and rate it as well.
And thank you for joining me,Kanika.
SPEAKER_01 (47:32):
Thanks a lot, Tamara.
It's been such a pleasure.
SPEAKER_03 (47:35):
Yes, thank you very much.
And thanks everyone.
All right, see you next time ortalk to you next time.
All right, bye.
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