The Legendary Falkville Metal Man!

"In 1973, the quiet town of Falkville, Alabama, came face to face with something out of this world—a gleaming, humanoid figure in a metallic suit, sprinting faster than any man alive. Was it an alien, a government experiment, or something even stranger? Dive into the mystery of the Falkville Metal Man on the Strange Brew Podcast—where truth is weirder than fiction."

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
The following show may shock, disturb, and offend some viewers.
The opinions, theories, and facts shared on this podcast are
not widely accepted by the brainwashed masses, especially those who
find dark humor offensive. Viewer discretion is advised.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
This kill said Head, Jeffrey Dagger so Blunt, the Unipommer
blowing up Wicko Texas and Heaven's Days and Aliens Modified

(00:43):
Men for Ames JFK shot on the head by the CIA,
Bigfoot and the mob Man.

Speaker 3 (00:49):
Start of Sam.

Speaker 4 (00:49):
Talking to tos again, Witches, JOm, Sam Got Serious Noise
and haunting stargards and the Skull and Bones. Most celebrities
are probably can so if you're feeling all.

Speaker 3 (01:01):
Alone, crack a beer and cat Stone.

Speaker 5 (01:03):
Welcome you to the.

Speaker 3 (01:04):
Podcast Strange Proof. We're here to entertain you. We're here
to entertain you, kid strange. It's about to get strange.

Speaker 6 (01:26):
How strange? Super strange?

Speaker 3 (01:28):
Okay, yeah, you're always okay?

Speaker 7 (01:33):
Are you your your dad?

Speaker 3 (01:37):
I haven't wait like I waited for you.

Speaker 6 (01:40):
No, I leave it today where we're coming back.

Speaker 5 (01:43):
Welcome you.

Speaker 3 (01:46):
Don't have a dad choke.

Speaker 5 (01:47):
They're they're getting like you never find them funny anyway.
I enjoy them.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
But yeah, but I'm sure the fans like them.

Speaker 5 (01:53):
Man, well you always I'm done being made fun of.
How about that about I have I have feelings to Tom.

Speaker 3 (02:02):
So. I have two beers I got. This is interesting.

Speaker 7 (02:05):
I got this flying Monkeys like stout pack and it's
all different types of chocolate stouts. So this one is
rabbit raspberry satin milk stout. And I also have an orange. Yeah,
I wish orange cream. Oh it's not catching because the
green scan.

Speaker 3 (02:25):
I had. The other one yesterday was a mint one.

Speaker 7 (02:27):
I was too drunk to remember the first one I
tried because I drank it after I was drinking.

Speaker 3 (02:32):
But it was weird.

Speaker 7 (02:34):
It tasted like a lit Legit tasted like milk chocolate,
mint chocolate.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
It was very weird.

Speaker 5 (02:39):
Actually that sounds I don't know.

Speaker 3 (02:42):
I feel like you would like it.

Speaker 5 (02:44):
I don't like it.

Speaker 6 (02:45):
You couldn't have six, but.

Speaker 3 (02:51):
You I know, because it's like these are like you
have like one or two.

Speaker 7 (02:54):
It's like a nice like night you buy a fireplace
finger popping each other and.

Speaker 6 (03:00):
You might not even end up finishing it.

Speaker 5 (03:01):
It might just kind of be a half a can
type of stitch.

Speaker 6 (03:08):
We're all anxiously awaiting.

Speaker 7 (03:09):
I kind of like it. This is the Raspberry. It
tastes like raspberry chocolate. If you see this in his store,
because I've seen it numerous times that I finally grabbed
one just out of curios, I would liked it, like
try it, maybe even save one for the show or something.

Speaker 3 (03:23):
M yeah, I kind of like it.

Speaker 7 (03:26):
Buying monkeys chocolate beer. All right, Welcome back to every everybody,
back to the show. Billy's kind of had a hiatus,
even though most of you don't really notice because there's
so many different episodes coming out at you from guests
were having on to Me and Aaron are covering and
offending everybody with our thoughts. But Billy's been moving and
and you know, going like he's been around, He's been

(03:47):
doing things. He's guy's own business.

Speaker 5 (03:49):
I've been the busy boy.

Speaker 3 (03:52):
M hm.

Speaker 5 (03:52):
So I'm out in a month and New Brunswick now
you can if you are listening from there, you're more
than welcome to.

Speaker 6 (03:58):
Please never contact me. I don't like talking to people.

Speaker 3 (04:01):
You used to give your phone number out on the show.

Speaker 5 (04:04):
I know, dude, I still I gotta I gotta call,
not a call a text. The other day and uh fuck,
I want to read it to here.

Speaker 3 (04:11):
Like somebody somebody asked, oh, was.

Speaker 5 (04:15):
That you that I'm like, this clearly came from I
didn't even say it was dude.

Speaker 7 (04:23):
It's because now that there's older episodes going to Cult
of Conspiracy, I have no idea if and we have
or maybe new fans coming in, like it's out there
that and he's Billy's getting a new number, so it
won't matter anyway, but like you legitimately put your.

Speaker 8 (04:38):
Number out to the internet.

Speaker 5 (04:43):
I don't know where it is. But it was like
it was like a really weird message where I'm like,
that clearly came from the podcast, but I'm.

Speaker 3 (04:50):
Not even someone recently. I don't know who it was.
Someone recently.

Speaker 7 (04:56):
I feel like I can't really remember someone's like, is
that actually Billy's phone number or something like that, And I.

Speaker 3 (05:01):
Was like, I think so.

Speaker 6 (05:03):
I had too.

Speaker 3 (05:04):
There was two.

Speaker 5 (05:05):
One person I did reply back to was is a
lot more nice about his reaching out, and the other
guy was just odd, So, well, fuck, what was it?
Sorry if I'm calling you out, but he's just like, yeah,
he said something. He's like, uh sorry. At the end
of it, he's like just got out of jail, and
I'm like, okay, I.

Speaker 6 (05:24):
Don't know what you want from me.

Speaker 3 (05:27):
Make me laugh, bitch, make me laugh?

Speaker 5 (05:30):
Is that what you're trying to get me to do that?

Speaker 7 (05:34):
You creepy bach If you had like messages like hey,
and it's like, hey, tell me a dad joke, and
you're like what, It's like, tell me a dad joke?
Some guy whacking off in his basement, she gets off
to dad jokes.

Speaker 5 (05:51):
Well, the last chance for anyone to do it. You
got him have two weeks, So the numbers null and
void because I'm a new Brunswick man now with a
new Brunswick number, no more Ontario.

Speaker 3 (05:58):
Yeah, it's so funny.

Speaker 7 (06:00):
At some point, I'm looked into it because I know
other shows that do it, and I was like, what,
how do you do this thing? I'm debating on doing
a like a call and app where people can leave
us voice notes and then we can play them mostly
on the Patreon, but if you pay for the Patreon,
we'll show it on the main show. Something like that,
And obviously I'm gonna vet them, but part of me

(06:21):
thinks would.

Speaker 3 (06:21):
Be funny not to, but I'm scared of what people
might say.

Speaker 5 (06:25):
Yeah, like we're already borderline pieces of ship, like we
don't need to go anymore.

Speaker 7 (06:34):
So I still want to think that'd be kind of fun,
So I should vet it at some point.

Speaker 3 (06:39):
Sure, so we are talking.

Speaker 9 (06:44):
About the legendary Fuckville metal Man encounter.

Speaker 3 (06:49):
Metal Man.

Speaker 4 (06:51):
Hopefully this doesn't get us copyright on YouTube.

Speaker 5 (06:56):
Get so distorted.

Speaker 3 (06:59):
I can hear it, that's all that matters.

Speaker 6 (07:01):
Sure, that's usually how you feel.

Speaker 5 (07:03):
Isn't it true?

Speaker 3 (07:10):
Did you hear that?

Speaker 5 (07:10):
That's so weird? Like I can hear it, but I
can't really hear it, like I know what you played,
but it's like like a deaf person watching your lips
move like you know, like you said, but period, no ship,
you can't hear it.

Speaker 3 (07:28):
Is about then I kissed him on the forehead, metal Man.
So this is an interesting case.

Speaker 7 (07:38):
So, uh, the police chief Jeff green Hawk of Fuckville. Yes,
what you what you say at Fuckville?

Speaker 3 (07:48):
Right? Fox Foxville?

Speaker 6 (07:51):
I bet it actually is like Fuckville.

Speaker 5 (07:53):
I bet they don't pronounce L but because like Folkville
would be with you.

Speaker 10 (07:58):
Yeah, I'm on the metal black Flackville.

Speaker 3 (08:03):
No, no Flualkville.

Speaker 5 (08:08):
No, where's the There's no U in that?

Speaker 3 (08:11):
So oh I want to should do that.

Speaker 7 (08:14):
Well, Billy's going now, I'm sure that's the just so
people see, look that Family Guy episode or like you
had me in.

Speaker 5 (08:23):
A little bubble on the top and you in a
little bubble on the bo that was a good one.

Speaker 3 (08:26):
That's what we're gonna do when we watch movies. Yeah,
yea together. Yeah, that's the idea across provinces.

Speaker 7 (08:34):
That's uh for for Patreon listeners, we'll be doing watch
alongs now that Billy hopefully.

Speaker 3 (08:38):
Will be a little more available.

Speaker 7 (08:40):
Well, we're really kind of try to dish out the
Patreon content, even small little mini sods and stuff like
that for other people that support because I want to
give them good content. So like I want to do
watch along of Strange Brew. Some of that stuff will
go live to Rumble, but then it gets taken off immediately.
So we're just doing it essentially to get people in
the chat and hang out and have fun. But like
Aaron wants to do scary movie, we got ideas. Yeah,

(09:02):
your chair is fucking Squeakville.

Speaker 3 (09:05):
Dude.

Speaker 5 (09:06):
I didn't realize how many pieces were in the other one.
I think it has the boot together. I didn't there's
a million you know, pieces are in a fucking office
chair of the bill. I thought it would just be
like done.

Speaker 7 (09:17):
Yeah, I know, I gotta build a new desk. I
gotta do it because everything's being moved around and I
gotta build.

Speaker 5 (09:22):
There's easily easily over eighty screws in there.

Speaker 6 (09:27):
Why the fuck is an office chair have that many screws.

Speaker 7 (09:32):
To make sure it's screwed together properly. You know, you
don't want those taken apart ever, you don't want those guys.
What's that guy from the office that Start'm just thinking
of his name? It's like you don't want him. You know,
we're like they got a whole lot of way, especially nowadays.

Speaker 3 (09:45):
Right, yeah, yeah. Extra wide plane seats. Why don't these
plane seats fit me? Miss? You are fucking five hundred pounds?
No ship?

Speaker 5 (09:54):
I want? I want. I think everybody agrees on extra
wide plane seats though, because.

Speaker 6 (09:59):
Like I want to in one. I don't need it,
but like it's nice.

Speaker 7 (10:02):
Billy wants a toilet also made into it so we
can just shoot on the plane, like just.

Speaker 3 (10:08):
Convenience.

Speaker 5 (10:09):
Like I don't I think you're making fun of you,
But that's amazing. That's such a good idea.

Speaker 7 (10:15):
Before we get into this one question. I really want
a bidet, but Chelsea keeps telling me no.

Speaker 3 (10:19):
I'm like, there's.

Speaker 5 (10:20):
One, there's one in this place of rens in here
it's not but it's not like a it's not like
regular one. It's like a I swear to gods like
I played around with it. It's like a water gun
on the side of it and you have like a
handle with a nozzle and the thing is insanely powerful.

Speaker 3 (10:36):
What the fuck do the roommates think you're doing.

Speaker 5 (10:38):
There's so much pressure coming out of it.

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Why does anybody just to really clean your ass man like?

Speaker 5 (10:47):
And that they could probably go a good like thirty
forty yards, Like there's so much pressure.

Speaker 7 (10:52):
I want to get one, even like we're like Chelsea
watching that dumb show Ninety Day Fiance.

Speaker 3 (10:56):
But it is why I do research for the show.

Speaker 7 (10:59):
It is entered painting, like it is entertaining man, just
because it's like this guy from this country.

Speaker 3 (11:04):
Oh, they're never gonna get along.

Speaker 7 (11:06):
Like it's like people always try to like make these
relationships work where this guy is from some Muslim country
and then it's just like this white lady from the
small town and it's like they're they're not gonna get along.
It's too culturally different, you know. So I'm like it's
funny to watch them and observe these people. And obviously
people act way different in front of cameras than they
would if the camera was off, Billy, But like it was.

Speaker 3 (11:32):
It for.

Speaker 7 (11:34):
That that douche commercial right where you like show people
to douche their asses.

Speaker 5 (11:39):
You really, you really, you really fought hard on that.

Speaker 3 (11:41):
One, or like wait are you been day salesman? Now
you're just like look at this ship, Look how clean
my asshole is. And you're just like showing people your
bid all the time. Look how clean that ship is.
You could eat off it?

Speaker 5 (12:01):
No, I got I gotta give credit re credits to
you for anybody even talking on camera, and like this
isn't really talking on camera. This is me like chatting
with you and hanging out and yeah, sure I see myself,
but when a whole camera crews in front of you
with a camera.

Speaker 3 (12:15):
I did it in Ontario for energy.

Speaker 5 (12:18):
I was a spokes guy for Attic Insulation for for
Average Gas.

Speaker 6 (12:22):
They wanted me to come and talk about that.

Speaker 3 (12:24):
How high can you hi?

Speaker 7 (12:25):
How how well can you hide and frank and you're
at pretty much.

Speaker 5 (12:30):
But anyways, I like, I was already doing this for years,
and my sales pitch was so fucking good and I
know so much about it, and the.

Speaker 3 (12:38):
Second that camera was rolling, my brain.

Speaker 5 (12:41):
Shut the fuck off. It was the most embarrassing four
or five minutes of my life. Like I was.

Speaker 6 (12:48):
Islation's good, Like that's.

Speaker 3 (12:52):
Like hide an attic, whole.

Speaker 5 (12:55):
Whole body froze like no, I couldn't. I couldn't sell
anybody with a camera on them. And still like seems
to be kind of normal, unreal, Like I have the
utmost respect for that, because this is not but a
film cruise on you. That's scary, and you're not allowed

(13:15):
to drink.

Speaker 7 (13:16):
So yeah, you can't get a confidence doesn't help unless
you're a politician.

Speaker 3 (13:19):
It's fine. Didn't you get drunk?

Speaker 7 (13:22):
There was a jagged mead sing was one hundred percent
drunk in the House of Commons. He was slurring his
words and stuff like that. They're all drugged up and stuff.

Speaker 3 (13:29):
All of them are just parasites, right, I just take politicians, Ok,
when was he drunk?

Speaker 7 (13:35):
I saw the clip? Like people are not gonna think so,
but like, uh, I don't think it was, and I
think I wasn't, Like maybe Jeremy talked about it, but
like I think somebody sent me it. And he's definitely
like like slurring his words and stuff like that. People
is that guy drunk in the House of Commons there
That one wasn't Andrea horror Bath. I hate that cun

(13:56):
but somebody else and and it describes her well, she
is a whore that bathes in You're right, I don't
know Indian, but like they're like they're probably all hopped
up on drugs, and she's like that there's one of
them that clip I just did recently where I called

(14:17):
them all out. The once you got on the end,
she was like at this like party, like it was
an election kind of party thing or something like that,
and she was like full blown, like drunk, screaming about
how thank god Omar Carter Cotter's home the terrorists who
he gave millions of dollars to a legit terrorist who
is in Guantanamo Bay who like killed people. They were
cheerleading and being like thank god, and they paid him

(14:39):
ten ten million dollars. That's where our money's going to
terrorist groups and Indians and stuff.

Speaker 3 (14:43):
Just so people know, do.

Speaker 6 (14:44):
You want to become a terrorist group an Indian?

Speaker 3 (14:47):
No? No, no, no, well no you can't. I just
all identify is.

Speaker 7 (14:52):
Don't say that too loud though technically Dagline is considered
a terrorist group in the eyes of some people. But
like I said, uh, my views are extreme to extremely
brainwash people, right, fair enough, yes, so right, it makes sense.

Speaker 5 (15:13):
I'm not going to rise.

Speaker 6 (15:15):
I'm really trying hard not to move so the charity.

Speaker 3 (15:19):
Yes, my views were quite normal about twenty years ago.

Speaker 7 (15:22):
So uh so police chief anyways, Green Jeff Green green Hall,
green Hall would happened, but I have something to changes
life forever by an encounter with a metal clad alien.

Speaker 3 (15:42):
Yes metal.

Speaker 7 (15:44):
Yes, okay, So October seventeenth, nineteen seventy three, the country
was in the midst of a nineteen seventy three UFO
fat Not not what you're thinking, Billy, I.

Speaker 6 (15:57):
Was still gonna make that joke.

Speaker 3 (15:59):
Gary on.

Speaker 7 (16:01):
Chief green Ha likely wasn't aware of this when he
took a call from an anonymous woman about to blinking
light lights landing in a field on the outskirts of
town owned by Bobby Somerford.

Speaker 3 (16:15):
Now that's a white name.

Speaker 7 (16:17):
Despite that, despite the fact that it was his day off,
the strangeness of the call, Chief green Haw suited up,
called in to let the duty officer know where he
was going, and went out to investigate. And when he arrived,
he spent fifteen to twenty minutes patrolling the pasture without

(16:39):
finding anything. He finally gave up a search, assuming that
he was the victim of some sort of prank, and
the exiting the field into a small dirt road when
he caught a sight of something standing in the road.
Initial initially Bobby thought it Our chief thought it was

(17:00):
Bobby summer Ford walking out to see why he was
driving around his property. That changed though, as he pulled
around the figure was fully illuminated by his headlights. Standing there,
standing in the middle of the road and about seven
seventy five feet away was a silver clad humanoid figure.

(17:22):
And in an interview with Red Red Red Water Fireworks
a few weeks later, is that a Native guy. Someone's
gonna get really mad for that, Red Water Fireworks.

Speaker 3 (17:36):
That's just kud. It's a business. But I am Redwater Firework.
I own the convenience start here, so I wish I
could do better, A better data accent, though, so Greenhaw
said that he initially thought he was just dealing with
an idiot.

Speaker 7 (17:56):
The opinion would quickly change. So this is the cop
and this is supposed to be the metal man.

Speaker 6 (18:04):
The guys just he's wrapped in tinfoil.

Speaker 3 (18:07):
I know, I know, he's the aluminum man. It's the illuminati.

Speaker 5 (18:16):
That was Sometimes you say things.

Speaker 7 (18:21):
So it uh he uh. He stood more than six
feet tall and was in a full spacesuit like outfit
made completely of silver metal and it was skinny with
a skinny antenna on the top of its head.

Speaker 3 (18:37):
It looked like his head and neck were kind of
made together.

Speaker 7 (18:41):
It's real bright, some like robbing mercury on nickel, but
just a smooth glass, different angles in different lighting, he
told interviews interviewers. The suit seemed to be a single
piece of material, So this is just a made up
but this is this is supposedly I swear this is
supposed to be the real picture of him.

Speaker 3 (19:00):
So maybe he.

Speaker 6 (19:01):
Heluminum so me, yeah, well I'm not.

Speaker 3 (19:04):
Yeah, it does like what not.

Speaker 7 (19:05):
Even researching this, I was like, it looks like somebody
just dressed up in in aluminum foil.

Speaker 3 (19:12):
He's like, this guy's like I saw how you a phone?

Speaker 7 (19:15):
The aliens are comming, so he's like tenfold himself out
like he's in signs.

Speaker 5 (19:20):
Actually agreed, that's funny.

Speaker 7 (19:25):
So the suit seemed to be a single piece of
material with no scene, with no neck met the head.
The whole suit reflected his headlights brightly, though I'm sure
what he was looking at. Chief Greenshaw opened his door
and stepped out to investigate further and addressed the person
in the suit. I said something to the effect of

(19:45):
how the stranger and there was no response at all.
At this point, he reached in and grabbed a poloid
camera that he used for photographing crime scenes and snapping
sexy pictures of himself in lingerie.

Speaker 5 (19:58):
I'm just kidding, Yeah, he did you see a change?
Expression like change? He's like, well, I'm gonna add something.
I think it's.

Speaker 3 (20:09):
Funny, Shad Hoover every but but really you're on a like.

Speaker 5 (20:15):
The wait, here's this? Sorry, the best you got?

Speaker 7 (20:17):
Apollo seventies one more pictures invented? Really you thought the
cameras were invented in the sixties?

Speaker 5 (20:25):
Fair enough.

Speaker 3 (20:27):
I'll never forget that, Alex, I didn't know.

Speaker 5 (20:33):
I wasn't there I wasn't alive. The quality was so
bad back then, I figured they were a.

Speaker 3 (20:38):
Brand new I know.

Speaker 7 (20:39):
I think it was that you like, uh, you didn't
think that. You didn't know when color pictures came out.
You thought they came out in the nineteen sixties or
something like that, Like.

Speaker 3 (20:47):
Why these photos not in black and white?

Speaker 7 (20:50):
As the party of Betty Hill's story, I should send
that one to the Cull boys to let that post it,
because I think fans I think it's funny.

Speaker 3 (21:00):
Yes, like he has a Polard camera. He reached it
and grabbed.

Speaker 7 (21:03):
It, uh, and then the beings remained still at that point.
I reached in and turned the blue light on the
patrol cock and seeing how reflective the material was.

Speaker 3 (21:16):
Then when I look back, it was moving from me.
So I decided to chase it down and if I
had to run it over, I would. That didn't happen either, what.

Speaker 5 (21:29):
Oh my god, I'm like, I can't follow this. Sorry,
is that what he said? Or are you paraphrasing.

Speaker 3 (21:35):
That's what he said? So he reached it, he took
it out of the patrol right of the light, and
then I did get high before this episode.

Speaker 7 (21:41):
Maybe not good idea when I look back, it was
moving away from me. So I decided to chase it
down if I had to run it over. But that
didn't happen.

Speaker 3 (21:51):
But that didn't happen, Okay, at this point, I thought,
At this point it chase began.

Speaker 6 (21:57):
Actually, sorry, in what world?

Speaker 5 (22:01):
I fucking love the sixties and seventies, like paraphrasing of
how like people thought or like, uh conducted their business
on everyday life back then. Like the cop sees something
and you're telling me his first reaction is to a
whip out that polaroid camera and snap a quick photo,
which is fair enough just in case it's actually fucked up.

(22:22):
I want to make sure I have documentation. But his
secondary reaction and b is I wonder how reflective that
material is. I'm gonna turn on my.

Speaker 3 (22:31):
Cup like to see, like, are you condensing a science experiment?

Speaker 5 (22:36):
Like get the guy I know, tell him to freeze
and hold your fucking gun.

Speaker 3 (22:42):
Was frozen there, he's just standing in the middle of
the road. Then walked towards him.

Speaker 5 (22:46):
He's like, turn on the light real quick because I
won't see how reflected this is.

Speaker 3 (22:50):
But like he already has headlights.

Speaker 6 (22:51):
If you wasn't reflect Would that have changed?

Speaker 5 (22:54):
Would that have changed your He's like, always not reflective.
It must not be dangerous. I'm almost that's what he's saying.

Speaker 7 (23:03):
At the point, like a chase began, so he turned
on his lights when and then he started driving after it.

Speaker 3 (23:09):
And this is why, like we get.

Speaker 7 (23:11):
To like why it couldn't just be a guy in
a tinfoil costume. Realistically, if I really wanted to, I
should have just put one on. I should have liked
just tin and foiled myself up for this episode. Would
have been a good idea. But like so there with
Green Green had also what a name followed at the
speed that seeded what a human could do. He said,

(23:34):
it wasn't moving like you will, Well I would move.
It's like a hat. It had springs on its feet
or something. It's springheel jacket, he's wearing a metal suit.
Never know, he's everywhere the most rapee cryptive to ever exist.

Speaker 6 (23:53):
Yeah, I wasn't. Yeah, we don't want to talk about
him no more.

Speaker 3 (23:56):
I gotta bring it back on the show eventually. I'm
just gonna he's a physically come on the show.

Speaker 7 (24:00):
He chased the creature at speeds of up to thirty
five miles per hour. Thirty five miles per hour doesn't
sound that fast.

Speaker 3 (24:09):
But I guess.

Speaker 6 (24:11):
You can't run that.

Speaker 5 (24:13):
I promise you no.

Speaker 7 (24:15):
That's for sure. Yeah, I guess you're right. That is
pretty you know, unless you're like Tom Peters or something.
What Tom Cruise is incredibly fast. It's his small height,
just like Zipsurride. He's like a little fairy well magic
faery that runs fast. You ever watched Mission Impossible?

Speaker 5 (24:37):
Oh my god? Okay, no, but yeah, like what's Usain
boat runs? What on a hundred meters dash? If I
had to guess, I mean like his top speed might
be like sixty kilometers, which.

Speaker 6 (24:52):
Is about just over thirty five. But that's only for
a very short period of time.

Speaker 3 (24:57):
Yeah, very fast black man, quick quick fast way, quick.

Speaker 5 (25:02):
Fast tall guy. So Kelly, I'm going to refer to
him from now on it the Olympian. Oh, the quick
fast tall guy.

Speaker 3 (25:12):
You forgot black. I'm just kidding. Uh, that's a good
thing that you can.

Speaker 6 (25:16):
See a quick, fast tall guy. He can't see at
night time.

Speaker 3 (25:20):
That's bad everyone, That's just a fucking joke. Jesus Christ.

Speaker 7 (25:25):
Black people can tackically run faster it's because they spend
a lot of times running between villages to fetch goat,
milk or whatever it is.

Speaker 5 (25:32):
You stay bolt only for about sixty to eighty meters,
which isn't even one hundred meters dash.

Speaker 6 (25:36):
He hits top.

Speaker 5 (25:38):
His top top speed is forty four kilometers thirty five miles.

Speaker 6 (25:43):
Is way faster.

Speaker 3 (25:44):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's crazy.

Speaker 6 (25:45):
Yeah, So that's that's skilled if something's going that quickly.

Speaker 3 (25:49):
Yeah, fastest amount of man alive.

Speaker 7 (25:51):
So like he's like Jay. He watched it run and
leap and bound. He described it as uncoordinated, moving awkwardly.
So that's like that'd be weird to like just going
like all across the road, despite the fact he could
barely keep up, barely keep up trying to keep it
in the car's headlights. By wise, he wasn't like just
blasting speed and uh he finally lost control of his

(26:13):
vehicle and it got stuck. He was left stranded, helpless
to watch the silver clad creature hop off into the
darkness of the night.

Speaker 6 (26:26):
Maybe he was arrested before and now he's scared.

Speaker 3 (26:30):
It's just like cops.

Speaker 7 (26:33):
I think this is the original photos. So like people
have tried to enhance it. But it's like.

Speaker 3 (26:39):
It like if that is, like I don't know it
is because his story is weird. So the guy was high,
cop was high. I think we'll get into this, but
I listened to him talk on an interview and it's
kind of shot. Yeah, it's sad. It ruined his life.

Speaker 5 (26:54):
Fine, really Yeah, he's just made because he got away
or everyone thought he was crazy.

Speaker 3 (27:01):
I thought he was crazy. I thought Greenhall was crazy.
Crazy boy.

Speaker 5 (27:06):
Maybe it was crazy.

Speaker 3 (27:07):
Sure, sounds like he's telling the truth when I heard
him on the interview.

Speaker 5 (27:14):
When I heard the crazy guy talk, I bet he
doesn't believe it.

Speaker 3 (27:19):
I bet you hate dang Dune saw that thing.

Speaker 7 (27:24):
So accounts very after sharing photos of his experience to
the press and other officers. But we do know that
by October nineteenth, Jeff Greenhaw became an unwilling celebrity. Story
of his encounter, along with copies of the photos, had
gone out to Newswire, and he and what he would

(27:44):
in his name in the papers across the country. This
would start a tragedy for Greenhaw because like this is
the photo, right, Everyone's.

Speaker 3 (27:52):
Like, what a fucking idiot that guy things he saw?
Metal man, you know, yeah, and back then so care Yeah.
Do you think people would be a little more open
to that now? Probably not, Yes, definitely compared to the seventies.
Do you think they were open now in the seventiesh.

Speaker 7 (28:14):
Yeah, they believe like, oh, if I vote, it's really
gonna do something to change my life, you know, stuff
like that.

Speaker 3 (28:20):
Yeah, it's just.

Speaker 7 (28:21):
Like but like they they were very close minded, right, like, yeah,
let's go to Vietnam and get those guods the just
fucking kill them. You know, like they were just like going,
we don't really know communism or some shit, and we
gotta go save save the other Vietnamese people, and save
us from communism. Meaning though it's halfway around the world,
you know, I hate communism, but like that's what like

(28:42):
it was. It's like America is definitely in ties with
something over there.

Speaker 5 (28:48):
Then though, I feel like, like, let's take religion for
an example. If you said you saw the second coming
of whatever god, you believe it.

Speaker 3 (28:58):
He didn't come the first time, I think.

Speaker 6 (29:02):
You're probably not.

Speaker 5 (29:02):
You weren't sexy, you're just a child. He has standards. Anyways, though,
if you do something like that, like I feel like
you'd make it further with more people back then with stuff.

Speaker 3 (29:15):
Like that to be like, oh it religious.

Speaker 5 (29:17):
Really they did see that because I don't know everything
like people. People weren't stuck in their ways, but the
Internet didn't exist, so nobody thought they were that smart.
Like everybody was more open to being like, oh, like,
that's not something I ever heard of it before.

Speaker 3 (29:30):
Tell me more. I doubt it.

Speaker 7 (29:32):
Were like Joan of Ar where she's like, I've seen
spirits and ghosts and I'm gonna leave an army and
all that stuff, right unless it's like way back then,
people in the seventies were definitely more closed minded.

Speaker 3 (29:43):
They were like, my government wouldn't lie to me. That's bullshit. Man.
They look, you know, like.

Speaker 5 (29:47):
You're you're, you're, you're, you're taking one particular example, and
you're in your rustling.

Speaker 3 (29:52):
But they didn't like it.

Speaker 7 (29:53):
They thought everyone saw UFO was crazy, that aliens is
a crazy thing. There's no way there's a little grease
spaceman out there. I'm gonna keep doing the same accent.
But they literally thought these things.

Speaker 6 (30:02):
They're always from fucking some.

Speaker 7 (30:06):
This guy said he thinks he's saw a little green man.
It's about fucking crazy. Go back to the poor house
and yourself, and I'll be fucker you know. It's like
saying ship like that.

Speaker 5 (30:17):
Similar, I'll go opposite then, uh, palm readers. Imagine if
palm readers never existed but came out today, not a
single fucking person would ever fucking buy that. But yes,
they worked around since the seventies. How people are like, oh,
they're real psychics my future.

Speaker 7 (30:39):
Yeah yeah, I agree with that point, right, but you
think about today people think that they're cats and dogs
and ship and that you if you cut off a
dick in a firm's of gender, you know. So like if
someone came alot like I guess you know, so I
was like, I can read your future with your hand,
and they're like, tell me more.

Speaker 3 (31:00):
Know in case you speak dog so dumb. So yeah, yeah, yeah,
keep going.

Speaker 7 (31:09):
I'm trying to, Like I got in trouble from the
fans because I don't shut up. And I was doing
an interview with Dustin Moys. I actually had him back
on the show yesterday to clear up that air so
I could really let him get his point across.

Speaker 3 (31:21):
But people are like, you need.

Speaker 7 (31:22):
To shut the fuck up, because like, even I want
to have conversations, not interviews. I was like the idea
of going back and forth. That's what I was used
to with me, you and Aaron and everybody.

Speaker 6 (31:31):
How many times I tell you that pissed me off?

Speaker 3 (31:34):
Back and forth, your turn to talk again? No problem.

Speaker 5 (31:41):
Yeah.

Speaker 7 (31:41):
So I've now logged that consciously and I have to.
I have to do it, you know. So I was
this gig excited, like when I jare me on. Me
and him are like going back and forth a lot
where it was just like just like a conversation having fun.
But I I hear you, fans, I acknowledge it, and
I'll shut the fuck up more often.

Speaker 6 (32:00):
H he's been, he's been going to sensitivity training.

Speaker 3 (32:05):
It's run by nazis.

Speaker 1 (32:08):
You.

Speaker 6 (32:09):
Your feelings are valid.

Speaker 5 (32:13):
Fans plural, Thank you, thank you.

Speaker 6 (32:17):
One person that's pissed.

Speaker 3 (32:21):
Yeah, thank you, thank you everybody. I appreciate that.

Speaker 5 (32:26):
I actually appreciate them too. I've been telling you that
for fucking ever. Drive me nuts. I love you, drive
me nuts.

Speaker 3 (32:34):
You know why?

Speaker 7 (32:34):
It is because I'm just uh like I do it
in real life too, where I'll fill dead air, dead air,
so it's it's it's dead silent.

Speaker 3 (32:43):
I'll be like, so, what did you think about like
the Jews? You know, it's like something like absurd, right, yeah,
I can't do it.

Speaker 5 (32:53):
That's that's that's the only way to fill void is
by going that hard.

Speaker 3 (32:58):
No, you could be like, so, how's the weather out there?
Have you looked up recently? It looks like there's a
lot of chemicals up there in the sky. I hate them.
It's terrible. I wonder what was that.

Speaker 5 (33:11):
Actually, this is going to become a tangent episode and
I'm over it. It's been a while since we do
this again, so I'm excited to come back and we
can go rants off a little bit. But what was
that video you showed me as a fucking uh the plane?
That was like, what was coming out of that plane
when he was landed?

Speaker 3 (33:28):
Oh, that shit's crazy? They had it turned on?

Speaker 5 (33:32):
Well, that was the comment. It was like, dummy forgot
to turn off the chemical trail. But it was just like.

Speaker 3 (33:37):
It's going to be something else. No, no, no, it's
really dude.

Speaker 7 (33:41):
There's a guy that had a commercial plane did a
video and he literally shows you where the fucking button
is where you just flicking on and essentially exhaust pour
out and it's aluminum and bury him. You can clearly
see it, and you can actually see I've seen videos
of ones where they're in the mid air, they're flying
and it turns off like literally a cut and then

(34:01):
they're just they fly away and you can clearly see
there's no contrast.

Speaker 5 (34:07):
Is there a different reason for doing that thing?

Speaker 3 (34:09):
Is that their reason is controlling the weather?

Speaker 5 (34:12):
No?

Speaker 7 (34:13):
No, No, they've admitted it. It's in it's in patents.
They've admitted this.

Speaker 3 (34:17):
They just call it.

Speaker 7 (34:19):
Yeah, they call it geoengineering. We did this on a
whole episode, Billy. It's called geoengineering. It's there's patents you
can find and essentially like they've had this where they've
done it in Texas. They've been manipulating the weather since
the fifties where they've admitted it in the military was
doing it over the ocean. We showed videos of this
ship on the episode, and you can clearly see that

(34:40):
they're doing that. So they've been doing geoengineering essentially comets,
is they So in Texas they've done it where they
spray aluminum or whatever in the sky and then it
participates rain. They get like oxide aluminum oxide, and it
forces rain to happen. So, but they're obviously adding other
chemicals or even not dustin emoys on like yesterday or whatever.

Speaker 3 (34:59):
And he sorry, he's like had a bloody nose. He's like,
I don't get like this at all.

Speaker 7 (35:02):
He's like, they've been barning Florida with chemtrails and they're
setting it out fire. There's fires everywhere and they're gonna
burn everybody in. So that's I'm like, me and Aaron
have covered some very very like serious shit in like
how the world is going. So I'm like, we're gonna
have some fun and going forward for a bit, because yeah,
it's literally was depressing me how crazy the fucking world
has gone.

Speaker 3 (35:22):
But yeah, it's not gonna be good. Just keep voting.
Uh yeah, so we all need Yeah, it's fine, we're good,
We're fine. It's okay.

Speaker 5 (35:36):
That's a metal man. What happened after this pole?

Speaker 7 (35:39):
So he went out, all of his photos got shared everywhere, right,
and he was in the papers across the country and
they started a month of his tragedy. We're ridiculed by
the townspeople. Can you give me some feedback? What were
they saying? How are they saying it.

Speaker 11 (35:55):
That that guy he have won too many of them
new ass oxy cons the.

Speaker 6 (36:05):
Isties.

Speaker 3 (36:07):
Yeah, nineties, he had won too many of them.

Speaker 5 (36:13):
Won't poppy seeds that were growing in the back of
fucking missus Darlene's farm.

Speaker 3 (36:19):
Stuart Heroin, That's all I got, So I got.

Speaker 7 (36:26):
And his and his fellow officers alike were like, you
crazy motherfucker. Most people thought it was he was pulling
a hoax, you.

Speaker 3 (36:36):
Know, surprise motherfucker for.

Speaker 7 (36:38):
Some reason, or at the best was an unwitting victim
or of one right of his hoax. Many people thought
it was just someone dressed up in the Halloween costume
that he had photographed. Then he began receiving threatening phone
calls at home.

Speaker 3 (36:56):
Rudermarks Well on duty. So there's people like, you fucking idiot.
You think you see a metal man, I'll fucking show
you metal man. I'll show you.

Speaker 6 (37:09):
And then and then what they're they're dressing up to be.

Speaker 3 (37:13):
The metal man every time you say metals O jerk
this one.

Speaker 7 (37:22):
But uh, they were like calling him and threatening him.
So I'm just like trying to think about what they
were saying, you know what I mean, Like you come
around my parts and you start talking about some sort
of metal.

Speaker 3 (37:33):
Man, I'm gonna make you fuck my wife, you know,
like I don't know what they're saying. She's notive, You're
not gonna like it. I'll rees her up for you.
I just for some for you.

Speaker 7 (37:51):
For some reason, I just pictured like this, like really
obese woman and like like a flower dress, you know,
when this old school seven. But she's in his backyard
in a pig pen, on her hands and knees, like
sniffing around for apples.

Speaker 3 (38:06):
That's okay to my mind.

Speaker 5 (38:10):
Weird, that's her over there.

Speaker 3 (38:14):
Ready for you. It's gonna be like Barber or something.

Speaker 5 (38:17):
So might scream.

Speaker 3 (38:20):
And then she's like, oh, have you seen fucking pigs screaming? No,
I don't fuck pigs, you know.

Speaker 6 (38:28):
Did you know pigs scream?

Speaker 3 (38:29):
Now?

Speaker 5 (38:29):
I want to So I was looking into.

Speaker 3 (38:31):
It for years.

Speaker 5 (38:34):
Now I know, and I'm gonna.

Speaker 3 (38:36):
Name him Winkers and he's gonna be mine.

Speaker 5 (38:37):
But anyways, I saw videos like people picking up their
pigs because they're like getting them in trouble because he
got into the apples or whatever got into the garden.
And the scream on them is insane. You need to
hear that sound. They should be on your soundboard. Honestly,
you'd love it.

Speaker 3 (38:55):
This taste like a Terry's chocolate orange.

Speaker 5 (39:00):
All those are good. I like those.

Speaker 7 (39:02):
Wow, that's fucking delicious. I actually like I kind of
like it. I kind of like these.

Speaker 5 (39:08):
Can you send me some fucking can you mail me
some craft beers? The craft beers down here are all
local breweries. Monkeys, it's good. There's no LC, that's yeah,
I still call it the LC constantly. But the craft
beer selection here in the liquor store is.

Speaker 3 (39:28):
Garbage flying monkeys.

Speaker 6 (39:32):
No, it's Ontario, that's just Ontario. It's not national.

Speaker 3 (39:38):
But uh Anton was able to sign monkeys beer. I'm
pretty sure.

Speaker 5 (39:44):
Maybe it's states thing states in Ontario. It's definitely not
out here. I can't find it anywhere. The only good
craft beer you can find down here is if you
go to the breweries. And there's a lot of them.
But I just like one of the I'll.

Speaker 3 (40:00):
See and just I want this one. Start yelling at.

Speaker 5 (40:03):
I know, you gotta send me some stuff. No, they
can't get it. They can't get it in your Brunswick like,
they can't order it. Like selection is way better grade
than down here. They're miles above I keep saying down there.
I hate that you say that you're up there.

Speaker 6 (40:20):
I said down here.

Speaker 5 (40:22):
Yeah, I'm technically I'm technically.

Speaker 8 (40:25):
Over here, but you're above me barely a lot wisely,
barely above you.

Speaker 3 (40:33):
I show map right now, you will see clear you
were above me. If you see.

Speaker 5 (40:39):
If there's ill, i'll come ship I am above you, but.

Speaker 6 (40:45):
Much not as much as you think.

Speaker 5 (40:48):
Job.

Speaker 3 (40:49):
Okay, are you gonna have this?

Speaker 6 (40:51):
Is this a Patreon episode?

Speaker 3 (40:52):
Now?

Speaker 5 (40:52):
No?

Speaker 7 (40:53):
I mean wanting to do this metal Man episode forever.
We'll make a Patreon ran episode and I'll just bring up.

Speaker 6 (41:00):
And I went an hour and a half more south.

Speaker 3 (41:03):
Okay, what I want it?

Speaker 5 (41:04):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (41:05):
Anyways, it sucks.

Speaker 3 (41:08):
Why is it sucks?

Speaker 6 (41:09):
It's cheap though, it's cheap.

Speaker 3 (41:11):
Yeah, you're above me so much so ship man. No,
you looked at she didn't you look? Just look at
the fucking map. You are above me. There's me.

Speaker 6 (41:25):
You can't trust these maps.

Speaker 3 (41:26):
I know you can't. You actually can't turn it.

Speaker 7 (41:28):
Oh weird, I guess. Okay, so I'm right down here somewhere.
I'm not gonna tell anybody. And then you're up here,
so you're above me.

Speaker 6 (41:39):
But but that's like fucking two meters.

Speaker 3 (41:42):
I'm down here, you're up there.

Speaker 6 (41:45):
I'm like a fingernail above you.

Speaker 3 (41:48):
Doesn't it up to the screen.

Speaker 6 (41:52):
I'm only like a fingernail.

Speaker 3 (41:54):
Yes, okay, like you're still still You're you're not up.

Speaker 5 (41:58):
There street though. But the world's on Toxes World.

Speaker 3 (42:03):
The world's flat. Just so you know, it is now
fun okay, all right, yes.

Speaker 7 (42:09):
I'm pretty I told you I want to do an
episode and I'll fight for flat Earth or vice versa,
and I just want like us to bring up you fight.
I want you to find like facts about either flatter.
It would be actually kind of funny because you're a
salesman to try to sell flat earth to people, and
I'll bring up like why it's not flat.

Speaker 3 (42:29):
I want to do that, you know.

Speaker 7 (42:34):
I think it'd be fun as a livestream because I'm
still on the fence. I think I think we live
in a simulation, so it doesn't fucking.

Speaker 3 (42:40):
Matter anyway, so I.

Speaker 5 (42:43):
Don't believe it.

Speaker 7 (42:43):
Yeah, I already kind of like afterrowing dustin Nimoys, he
calls a biblical earth. He's like every for centuries and
thousands of years, everyone thought it was flat until very recently.
And I'm like anything, explains why he thinks it, why
it's biblically referenced, and he's a Christian, but he's pretty smart.

Speaker 3 (43:00):
He's like done a fair to be fair.

Speaker 5 (43:03):
The other objective to that is everyone thought it was
flat until they went into space and looked at it.

Speaker 3 (43:09):
But did they but they went but did they weird?
But okay, well let's say they didn't.

Speaker 5 (43:17):
You know what I do know.

Speaker 3 (43:18):
For the Moon was definitely faked.

Speaker 5 (43:21):
You know what I do know for fact that's not arguable, though,
is every other planet's round. See those from our from
our our moon, the Moon's round. You can see that.

Speaker 3 (43:33):
People think it's people think it's plasma.

Speaker 5 (43:37):
They think a plasma circle is in the in Okay,
so in the Sun's round. Yeah, and because it has
a ring, but you can see.

Speaker 3 (43:50):
It, okay, just because things millions of people have seen.

Speaker 7 (43:54):
Yeah, yeah, I understand that. I understand that. But they
also have theories for that too.

Speaker 5 (43:59):
Okay, So you have to.

Speaker 3 (44:02):
Yes, you have to prove to me that the Earth
is flat.

Speaker 6 (44:06):
But when do we get to that? I want to
go on the other I believe the other side.

Speaker 7 (44:13):
You know, I've seen plants, some weird ship but also
when I was on mushrooms. Every time on mushrooms, all
the stars ter like they connect with like like it's
like a feel.

Speaker 3 (44:25):
It's fucked up. Everyone sees it. It's not just me.

Speaker 7 (44:27):
I've had other people say when they're on mushrooms and
they look up with the stars, it like is this web?

Speaker 1 (44:33):
So?

Speaker 7 (44:33):
Is that the reptilian web that's holding us down in
this reality? And then we just keep reincarnating back into
the slavery.

Speaker 3 (44:40):
Never know? All right, So then you get people start threatening.

Speaker 7 (44:47):
Him at that work and making remarks whatever he's called,
that house whatever. Then then the engine his car blew up,
likely the result of sabotage. Somebody blew up this guy's engine.
To add insult to injury. Claiming the stress and harassment,
his wife filed for divorce. So much for better or worse.

Speaker 5 (45:08):
Yeah, she's like, I don't you're a liar. He probably
told her. He's like, I'm doing this, I'm doing this thing.
Back me up, and I want to.

Speaker 3 (45:18):
It's kind of sad for him.

Speaker 6 (45:20):
That's that might have been what happened. Phone calls.

Speaker 11 (45:23):
If you don't fucking knock it off, I'm killing your wife.

Speaker 6 (45:25):
Oh click, she goes.

Speaker 5 (45:29):
I gotta get out of here.

Speaker 7 (45:30):
She's getting sucked by the metal man. I gotta leave you.

Speaker 6 (45:36):
What a twist?

Speaker 3 (45:38):
What a fucking twist? Middleman's over there and she's like,
this takes so much better? What a what a what's that? Stupid? Uh?

Speaker 7 (45:48):
God, I had it on to my tongue and you
said that, maybe what's that? Stupid director? I actually really
like his stuff. He always has a twist.

Speaker 3 (46:00):
What a twist? No, that pedophile? What's it? God? Damn, it's.

Speaker 7 (46:09):
M night Shamalom and ding Dong a I Shamelom and
ding dong guy. Yeah, I actually like his move. Have
you ever seen Old? You should watch Old, dude.

Speaker 3 (46:20):
It's good.

Speaker 7 (46:22):
They're on a resort, they go find this, there's this
weird part of the island.

Speaker 5 (46:25):
And then I'm like, I'm there's a twist.

Speaker 3 (46:28):
I bet it's a big twist. It was really good.
It was actually really good.

Speaker 7 (46:35):
And then he also did a recent one, uh where
they're at a concert and it's it's actually like his movies.
They're pretty like you'll see I'll set the same. You
would actually like these.

Speaker 3 (46:48):
They're like.

Speaker 7 (46:50):
Suspense movies, you know, so.

Speaker 5 (46:57):
Old.

Speaker 7 (46:57):
And then there's another one that they he recently came
with and it was really good. As if things couldn't
get worse. On November ninth, Oh that's a day after
my birthday, his trailer home had burnt down. But no
Arson is suspected, yo, like literally from just like being
like I saw metal.

Speaker 3 (47:13):
Man, I believe what I saw. I capture picture of it.
I captured a picture of it. This is what it is.
He's had his whole life destroyed. His wife left him,
people making fun of him, He's getting death threats, his
car fucking blew up, and then his trailer home after
he had nothing left and he had to go move
into a trailer home that was set on fire.

Speaker 5 (47:39):
That sounds pretty Shittyah, that sucks.

Speaker 3 (47:42):
That's why in the interview, I get it. He's just like.

Speaker 5 (47:49):
In the air.

Speaker 6 (47:50):
So when was this interview though, Like was the interview.

Speaker 3 (47:52):
Back then nineteen seventies after it.

Speaker 6 (47:56):
Was like while it was happening, he had the interview.

Speaker 7 (47:58):
Yeah, yeah, all this stuff was happening probably year. Then
a week, Oh, he's still alive. He's out there somewhere.
Then a week later, the city officials had called him
into a meeting and pressured him to step down after
less than a year on the on.

Speaker 3 (48:15):
His job.

Speaker 7 (48:17):
Fair after uh So, after all this, Greenhaw did his
best to withdraw from the public eye moved on to
work in other municipalities, for the stigma of the metal
Man citing haunted him endlessly. In an interview, he said,
I pretty much way drew withdrew myself from the public

(48:39):
for years, Betrayed by his friends and family alike. He laminated,
laminated people who were supposed to be my friends. The
only thing I found out is that I really couldn't trust.

Speaker 3 (48:51):
Anyone laminating sentences. It's very shiny. I ran, and that
I ran, and I went into places to get away
with it, to get away from it, to get away
with it. Yeah.

Speaker 7 (49:08):
So fast forward ten years later to nineteen nineteen eighty three,
and I would have guessed that Jeff Greenhaw thought that
the fallout from his alien encounter was behind him. But
there was more. Fucking there was more to come. So yeah,

(49:33):
there was it was there was more to come. On
the exact, almost the exact anniversary of his encounter, somebody
broke into his home and they stole three items. They
took hish wow, they took a shotgun, they took a shotgun.

Speaker 3 (49:50):
His revolt. Maybe maybe it's true, is they.

Speaker 7 (49:56):
Took his guns, like his shotgun, his service revolt and
the photographs he had hidden away. But how would they
know where the photographs were?

Speaker 5 (50:07):
Oh you can ransack anyone's apartment hard enough find anything
you're really fucking looking for it. I A'll find it,
will you though?

Speaker 3 (50:17):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (50:17):
Yeah absolutely.

Speaker 5 (50:18):
If I'm allowed to just turn over a fucking building
hide anything from me, I'm going to find it.

Speaker 6 (50:24):
If I'm like fully just like ramsacking through.

Speaker 7 (50:27):
Something, something I would love to do with you one
day is uh, what's that called amaze run or amaze
that the amazed room my escape room?

Speaker 3 (50:40):
Yeah?

Speaker 5 (50:42):
Nice?

Speaker 3 (50:43):
No, I got it.

Speaker 6 (50:44):
I got banned from the one in Burlington.

Speaker 5 (50:46):
I'm not allowed to go there anymore.

Speaker 3 (50:48):
I doubt they'll remember you.

Speaker 6 (50:51):
Yeah, you know what to be fair, Yeah that was back.
That was what twenty eighteen?

Speaker 3 (50:54):
How did you get banned?

Speaker 5 (50:56):
I I was getting the clues were getting hard and
I was getting annoyed, so I just like started like
forcing shit kick.

Speaker 6 (51:09):
So there was like you need in this drawer and
I'm like watch me get.

Speaker 3 (51:13):
Im at the I'm like, oh, I'm locked.

Speaker 5 (51:18):
Broke, Look I got in all years of speaker, don't
break you quick, I'm like, ah, sorry. So then I
realized that every time you go forward, so they never
actually unlock like the front door, and like because you can't,
it's fire hazard. In case like people get locked in,
you can always run back out. So I kept running backwards.
So I'd go into like the main lobby with the lady.

(51:40):
I'd be like, tell me what's next.

Speaker 3 (51:44):
She's like stop, and she kept pushing.

Speaker 5 (51:47):
Me in there, and then I kept turning around. I'd
be like, give me a clue, and just harassed her.
Not actually band. It was more of just like, please
don't come back. I've never been annoyed, it needed anything. Sorry,
I've never been to one. I'd like to go.

Speaker 6 (52:03):
There's one in Cambridge really close to you.

Speaker 7 (52:06):
Yeah, but I want you want you want to go
with people? You just want me and Chelsea and want
to just go by yourselves.

Speaker 5 (52:13):
Have fun.

Speaker 3 (52:14):
How much I hate you. I was gonna say, it's fun.
I know what, You're.

Speaker 7 (52:24):
Just kidding everybody. It's a fucking joke because you can't
take a joke. Then then I don't know, suck a weed.

Speaker 3 (52:32):
That's true. Okay, So you.

Speaker 6 (52:35):
Could go with Chelsea, it'd be fun.

Speaker 3 (52:37):
You said, you can't. It seems like you've them like
four people most times.

Speaker 5 (52:42):
No, like, well you have that four people because people
are dumb and honestly, I was drunk, like they are
a little they are a little tough. Depending on the
difficulty level you go into. You can ask for easy
mode and they'll give you easy mode and it's kind
of fun.

Speaker 3 (52:55):
It's like a bts M sex club type of one.
That'd be fun.

Speaker 6 (53:01):
I don't know if you know what escape rooms are.

Speaker 3 (53:04):
What am I escaping? Are escaping a guy? The other
bound outfit?

Speaker 5 (53:09):
So a horror house is kidding, that's that's a Canada's
Wonderland is.

Speaker 3 (53:16):
What you want to go to? Kike?

Speaker 5 (53:20):
So what Disney World?

Speaker 7 (53:22):
When interviewed about the break and he said, I thought
that was really weird. Only the only three things I
had with me at the night, the shotgwnering in the car,
the service revolver, and the pictures all three of them
came up missing. So like what he had when he

(53:44):
saw the Metal Man was his shotgun, his revolver and
photographs of the Metal Man?

Speaker 5 (53:56):
Right, did his whole did this whole polaroid camera get
song or just the photographs, just.

Speaker 7 (54:02):
The photographs, because he isn't at this time, he's just
stuff the cat stashed away of like these are my
press photos.

Speaker 6 (54:11):
The revolver in the shotgun.

Speaker 7 (54:15):
Because that's it's just what he had that because he
was a cop, right, he had this service revolver and
his shotgun. So if he felt really depressed on him
one shift to get blow his.

Speaker 5 (54:23):
Brains, shouldn't they have fucking taken that when they fired him.

Speaker 3 (54:29):
No, if you're in duty long enough, they're gonna like
it's your ship. I'm sure you like purchased it or
something like that, or giving it so you can kind
of it's alabim it's Alabama, man, what do you think
is going on?

Speaker 5 (54:44):
Every single thing you have as a as a officers,
your your government's property.

Speaker 3 (54:51):
It's true, and you are.

Speaker 5 (54:53):
No longer working for them. It is given back to
them immediately.

Speaker 3 (54:56):
It's Alabama, but he still had it. It's Alabama.

Speaker 6 (54:59):
That that explains it. I take back all of my remarks.

Speaker 7 (55:06):
Listen, the guy that probably ran the station was probably
his cousin. It's like, you know, I know we share
the same last name, greenholl but you need to like.

Speaker 5 (55:18):
We got two greenhows here and there's one greenhouse too.

Speaker 11 (55:22):
Many, and you need to go home. And you know what, here,
I'm gonna do your favorite, your favor. I'm not evil.
Don't look at me like I'm evil. I'm gonna do
your favorite. Let's keep the revolver. You can keep the revolver, Okay,
don't you go selling it on ebit now, because I'll
see it and i'll probe buy it. He'll be real

(55:44):
mad at you.

Speaker 5 (55:46):
Don't. Don't you keep the revolver.

Speaker 3 (55:49):
Go home. Don't use on yourself.

Speaker 5 (55:52):
He's on your wife. I never liked her anyway. We're
going to be in an old I want to.

Speaker 3 (56:00):
Be born in like the sixties.

Speaker 7 (56:02):
While after seeing what the world is now, I want
to be born in like, I don't know, nineteen, like
fifty eight or something like that, the good old year.

Speaker 5 (56:13):
You know, I'll never ever forget the one Englishman in
the world that ever said this to me. You do
not want to be more than nineteen fifty eight. You
want to be born in the future, because maybe the
future is different. But one time I was sitting there
and it was Monday, and I set out for a smoke,
and a stupid Englishman he said the most insane thing

(56:35):
to me that was sounded so dumb but actually really
resonated with me. It was I was sitting out having
a smoke. It was Monday outside a tiger Cat, and
I'm like, fuck, I wish it was Friday already. And
he goes, don't. He goes, wish it was last Friday.
He was like, I'm old enough to know you never
wish your life away. And then he just walked away,
and I'm like, oh, okay, so you do not wish

(56:59):
you were born nineteen fifty eight.

Speaker 6 (57:01):
You want to be born in three thousand and fifty.

Speaker 7 (57:03):
Eight, Why so I could be born in the Noah
Hyde communist order.

Speaker 5 (57:09):
No, maybe it's crazy. Maybe it's like every single person's
its own government at that point.

Speaker 3 (57:14):
I don't want any of that shit. I'd rather go
back crazy weird.

Speaker 5 (57:18):
You can like zoom up to Earth or zoom up
to every planet in the world, and like they can't
do for everything.

Speaker 7 (57:23):
And technically, because of our age, we grew up at
a height of a civilization and now we are actually
witnessing the decline of civilization.

Speaker 3 (57:34):
It's true, like we are witnessing.

Speaker 7 (57:36):
The decline of Canada, of the Western world of white people,
of people in general, of everybody.

Speaker 3 (57:43):
It's literally in decline.

Speaker 7 (57:44):
So we witnessed the height of it the nineties eight
like at least the nineties were started like it was.

Speaker 3 (57:49):
Getting there to the peak. Everyone's getting along.

Speaker 7 (57:51):
Everyone's like, you're able to make enough money, like everything
was kind of there was no wars, and then fucking
nine to eleven hit.

Speaker 5 (57:58):
You remember what we were saying, this is a fun showing. Yeah,
it's true.

Speaker 7 (58:05):
So Alabama, you know, he's he's in Alabama, and they
seem to think that there was a terrestrial explanation for
Jeff Hawks encounter, like they obviously were like, it's not
a metal man, it's gonna be something much cool. Like
George Bush for a second, the most popular. We're gonna

(58:25):
go to Afghanistan and we're gonna get them terraces us.

Speaker 3 (58:31):
He's got this like a certain twang to it though
it's it's.

Speaker 5 (58:34):
It is a little a little twang even not like
straight from Texas, Like yeah, no, that was pretty good.

Speaker 7 (58:39):
The most popular was the one photograph. What he was
photographed was a local team and a shiny costume.

Speaker 3 (58:47):
Fast people thought, but there was like.

Speaker 5 (58:50):
A local team in a shiny costume that can run
forty five miles an hour. Yeah, I know. It was
the fastest teenager on this goddamn planet.

Speaker 3 (58:58):
And like he trying to hit him with a cop
couldn't He.

Speaker 7 (59:01):
Seems sincere, right, Like when I listened to him talk,
he'd like, you seem pretty sincere.

Speaker 6 (59:07):
And that's the thing with crazy people.

Speaker 5 (59:10):
They don't know where they're crazy.

Speaker 6 (59:13):
They think it's true.

Speaker 3 (59:16):
Yeah, I know.

Speaker 7 (59:18):
You have a bunch of religious people being like, we're
the chosen people. It's okay if we slaughter massive amounts
of people, we're chosen.

Speaker 5 (59:25):
Yeah, not too far off the way the other day,
nice paraphrasing.

Speaker 7 (59:33):
The only answer would be if that green haw had
made up the whole thing, because how would the metal
man yeah run that fast?

Speaker 3 (59:40):
Will?

Speaker 7 (59:41):
No one else could rule out that as a possibility.
It seems unlikely. Jeff never tried to profit from his sighting,
and it nearly ruined his life. See that's what like
when it comes to people who have encounters like we
talked about. Even you know, an episode that I still
love is the The Hopskin Villain count where there was.

Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
Billy Ray and Bobby Ray, Genie Ray whatever.

Speaker 7 (01:00:04):
It's all like, there's all the cousins or whatever, and
they see those green creatures on the roof, remember that
the aliens, and they're like, what the fuck is that thing?

Speaker 3 (01:00:11):
Right? And like they never tried to profit off of it.

Speaker 7 (01:00:14):
When you see it, people are like, I'm going on
a book tour next week. Got changed my voice a
little bit. I go on a book tour next week,
and I'm gonna do the same thing. But I go
on a book tour next week, and I'm gonna like,
I'll tell you about my alien encounters or whatever. Right,
you see that a lot of people are trying to
make money off of it. But there's certain cases like
this guy and others where I don't know, it just

(01:00:35):
seems kind of like he's not really you know, only
he's not meaning to. He just is like, this is
what I saw. It was really weird. I don't know
what happened. And then they're like, shut the fuck up,
you're lying, you know. It's like a little sad.

Speaker 6 (01:00:51):
About were scared too.

Speaker 3 (01:00:53):
And actually that was the one big thing I'll give
you to.

Speaker 5 (01:00:55):
Our earlier argument is between the seventies and today is
back then it.

Speaker 6 (01:01:00):
Was like so much more aggressive.

Speaker 5 (01:01:03):
If someone didn't believe it, like it's like you fuck you,
fuck you in your mouth. Yeah I know now, it's
like that guy's crazy, and they walk away exactly.

Speaker 7 (01:01:13):
Well, you see that people I couldn't handle. Like if
if you show them clear evidence, like if you had
a cell phone even it be like, this is something
that you communicate with people with in the seventies and
you can text on the like the internet.

Speaker 3 (01:01:25):
They'd be like, what is the internet? Like, they would
just think you're crazy.

Speaker 7 (01:01:28):
Right, if you could show them technology now back then,
they'd be like, I'm not going to see that in
my lifetime.

Speaker 3 (01:01:34):
And then they did you know what I mean? Yeah,
fair enough unless they were in the war, but yeah,
fair enough, that's true. And then they were like I
fought on the wrong side. Look at the countries now,
So I'm kidding everybody. Hitler was paid opposition for sure,
so uh, he was part of it. They wouldn't have

(01:01:55):
Israel without him. So the only answer would be if
green I was making the whole thing up.

Speaker 7 (01:02:01):
Well, no one could can rule out as a possibility.
It seems unlikely. Jeff never tried to profit from the sightings. Yes,
I said, nearly ruin his life, while there's pictures to
support his story. Yeah, due admit that it would have
been nice for, you know, someone to have gone out
and done some investigation the following morning, but obviously no

(01:02:21):
one did that.

Speaker 3 (01:02:22):
They could have been.

Speaker 7 (01:02:24):
Some prints on the road or the very least tire
tracks from the chase. That would have been more evidence,
you know, like they had more evidence tex try to
prove it. Those those that would have supported his story
of like, and nobody investigates. So if they did go
out and we're like, oh, yeah, weird, they see his

(01:02:44):
car tires, there was like some sort of chase, if
there was footprints, Like, it's too bad that.

Speaker 3 (01:02:51):
He didn't try to catch any.

Speaker 7 (01:02:55):
Of it, like you know what I mean, but it's
late and dark, and yeah, polaroid camera doesn't catch much,
especially in.

Speaker 3 (01:03:01):
The saturdays, you know what.

Speaker 5 (01:03:03):
That's actually crazy though, And that's one thing I didn't
think about, is like if you had a picture back then,
like that meant a lot. It's not like today where
you can you can forge anything. It's still like every
picture even.

Speaker 6 (01:03:15):
Real, like you couldn't forge it.

Speaker 3 (01:03:17):
Like the only way to forge.

Speaker 5 (01:03:19):
That picture is to pay somebody to dress up that
way and take their picture.

Speaker 3 (01:03:25):
Long it would take for them to do that too.

Speaker 5 (01:03:28):
What's the difference between the left and the right one?
Is the left one the actual polaroid and the right
ones the.

Speaker 7 (01:03:34):
I think that he caught two. He may have cut
two or three different foes. I think three altogether.

Speaker 5 (01:03:38):
Okay, so one of these then, okay, So why okay?
These are When these stories become nonsense is when every
picture is fucking different.

Speaker 7 (01:03:46):
So this picture is the same that picture. It is
the same as that picture. Yeah, no, go back though,
same yeah, same No, the left one go back same.

Speaker 5 (01:03:59):
The left one looks like like if I saw that
in the seventies and'll be like, holy shit, that is something.
The right one looks like somebody like posing. It looks
like they're posing.

Speaker 7 (01:04:09):
They were just standing in the road. And I don't
know how far he caught it back. I wasn't there.
I didn't talk to him, But I'll try to get
him on the show after I've made fun for an hour,
didn't you you know?

Speaker 3 (01:04:20):
I think that's him.

Speaker 6 (01:04:22):
Yeah, that's gotta be him. That's probably him.

Speaker 3 (01:04:24):
Actually, I kind of gave the robot man underwear.

Speaker 5 (01:04:28):
He can't see his robots small conscious it's so weird.

Speaker 7 (01:04:35):
So while researching this post, I found it interesting interesting
to comment from someone claiming to have known the prankster
that was in the suit. I'm actually from the area
and made a video on him. To much pretty much
thinks it was a hoax played on the guy name
by a guy named Ricky Joe Smith. And then Ricky
John Smith is not always doing that, It's not he

(01:04:57):
was a prankster. I showed up at a hall of
being part of the exact costume as the MetalMan two
weeks later. However, Greenhaw was a victim of this for
the exact reason why people don't come forward with their encounters,
and that was by someone named mystery Junkie ninety eight
oh eighths. Sure, again, this is possible explanation, But if

(01:05:20):
Greenhaw was the victim of a prank, how did the
perpetrator manage to outrun his cruiser? Hung hoax to this
degree with a rural police officer seemed to be in
seemed to be incredibly riskey. So Greenaws encounter took place
just days after the passa. I'm not gonna be able
to pronounce this. I'm gonna go look this up because

(01:05:42):
I will not be able to pronounce this.

Speaker 6 (01:05:44):
There's no super professional. Yes, we're professionals.

Speaker 7 (01:05:49):
We're professionals. Now give me some money so I can
live off the show one.

Speaker 3 (01:05:53):
Day, because that would be really nice to see.

Speaker 5 (01:05:59):
We won't even attempt to say words that we don't
know how to pronounce. An wait here, we will take
the time to google the pasca.

Speaker 3 (01:06:06):
Gua, pasca goula. Okay, pasca Google pasca gura pasta goula Okay, sweet,
So that's how you say it. Just after days pasca
goula abduction. In that event, two men were abducted by
two shiny metallic aliens. These both took place in nineteen

(01:06:26):
seventy three. In the UFO FAP ty don't type that
into Google though, and with oh my god, I wonder
what's gonna come up.

Speaker 5 (01:06:36):
I'm very.

Speaker 3 (01:06:39):
UFO FAP.

Speaker 5 (01:06:43):
Want to really bad.

Speaker 3 (01:06:45):
Hey do that why I finish this?

Speaker 7 (01:06:46):
So these metal they were abducted around the same time
by two shiny metallic aliens that both looked like they
were placed in nineteen seventy three.

Speaker 3 (01:07:00):
I think incredible UFO.

Speaker 7 (01:07:01):
When alien countered to the it seems a largical conclusion
that both Greenhaw and these men from Pasca, a Gogola
event where the same creatures. Maybe do I look like
I'm like from the Like from nineteen ninety nine.

Speaker 3 (01:07:15):
It's just one of those days.

Speaker 5 (01:07:19):
So and Google it didn't work. So we are now
looking on porn sites and something comes up.

Speaker 3 (01:07:26):
Okay, let's see.

Speaker 6 (01:07:28):
Nah, it doesn't nothing.

Speaker 5 (01:07:30):
Oh my god, what the fuck?

Speaker 7 (01:07:36):
I look at Fred Durst right now? Where I fucking
so for people watching on the video. This is how
I used to wear my hat when I was seventeen.

Speaker 5 (01:07:43):
People are fucked Why I can't show us on the stream.

Speaker 6 (01:07:51):
This is the most disturbing shiit.

Speaker 7 (01:07:53):
See why we need episodes, dude, we gotta do a Patrio.

Speaker 3 (01:07:57):
I'm just gonna find in.

Speaker 5 (01:07:59):
The unappropriate websites and I'm literally like, it's all cartoon,
but it's literally people fucking aliens.

Speaker 7 (01:08:07):
That sounds fun. Save that and we'll bring it up
on a Patriot episode.

Speaker 5 (01:08:11):
Why are people so fus? Anyways? You never actually say,
because I googled it on actual Google, and uh, you
never saw what fat meant. You just laughed and said,
not that. But it's the Peruvian Air Force, just so.

Speaker 3 (01:08:30):
You know fat. Yeah, oh that makes sense.

Speaker 10 (01:08:35):
Well, no, Peruvians that took place during the UFO fatwards.

Speaker 5 (01:08:40):
Though Peruvian Air Force, it'd be forced air Peruvian.

Speaker 3 (01:08:45):
Oh my bad, it's UFO flap.

Speaker 6 (01:08:50):
No, it would be path.

Speaker 7 (01:08:52):
No, No, it's like during I don't know if they're
trying to say like it's a they're wording like there's
a lot of UFO encounters in nineteen seventy three, So
it was during the nineteen seventy three UFO flap.

Speaker 3 (01:09:04):
Not FAB.

Speaker 5 (01:09:06):
But flap FAP is the thing. It's a Peruvian Air Force.
But that's even about what is it they call why
they call they call themselves fat, but it's it doesn't
it would be PAF not.

Speaker 3 (01:09:17):
F a p Why is like a porn site thing?
Is it? Like? Why is fapping a thing?

Speaker 5 (01:09:21):
Is that?

Speaker 7 (01:09:21):
Because it's like like does that make a fapping sound?

Speaker 5 (01:09:26):
That is you for your own time to look up that?

Speaker 3 (01:09:32):
Why look it up?

Speaker 7 (01:09:33):
Look up why masturbations associated with fapping? We're almost at
the end of this. I want to know, just look
up why do people call masturbation fapping? Because like does
it mean also women or just does it mean like
does it mean just men? And it sounds like up,

(01:09:54):
you know, I don't know what it was fapping. Why
is is that? Why is that associated with that ship?

Speaker 3 (01:10:01):
Oh? Wait, I got a perfect sound for this. Don't
say anything yet or is it? God damn, you nailed it.

Speaker 5 (01:10:09):
But I wanted I wanted to see the Google translation
of that exact sentence.

Speaker 3 (01:10:13):
Okay, just wait, try to find the Google I got it.

Speaker 5 (01:10:17):
I got well, I got the AI overview, which is great.
I fucking love this AI overview. It's so nice when
you're trying to look something up.

Speaker 7 (01:10:25):
Disappointing, I had the I have the jeopardy like Dan,
and I wish I had it. Whatever, Okay, carry.

Speaker 5 (01:10:34):
On, they're Onopa, fat meant to it?

Speaker 6 (01:10:40):
Fox, Si fat meant it?

Speaker 3 (01:10:45):
Get it to say it?

Speaker 5 (01:10:48):
To say? The sound of a man masturbating fat is
first credited to an English translation of scene from a
Japanese manga Heartbroken Angels Kids a Duke Garrio Tekashiki by
Mashio Kanikui, a series which ran from nineteen eighty eight

(01:11:09):
to nineteen ninety one.

Speaker 3 (01:11:11):
Weird Fat, That is so weird.

Speaker 7 (01:11:16):
I just like, Oh, it's a sound effect for that,
but the fact that that is so old, Yeah, that's.

Speaker 5 (01:11:22):
From I guess that that that word came out, it
is fapping, and then everyone just ran along with it. Crazy.

Speaker 7 (01:11:30):
That's so weird, my nuts fun fact you have one, right.

Speaker 5 (01:11:37):
Oh, I got such a better one than that. You
might not like it, but I thought it was fucking hilarious.

Speaker 3 (01:11:42):
Okay.

Speaker 7 (01:11:42):
So while many people assume you know that, uh, you know,
the metal the metal Man event was a hoax, either
perpetrated by or play on Jeff Green Haha. I find

(01:12:03):
this conclusion to be unsatisfactory, as greenhod ever profited from
his encounter or more or less avoided it in you know,
the years, he essentially like it destroyed his life. As
what that means for Fuckville Mental Man was I could

(01:12:25):
only guess that it was an alien in a suit
or a robot of some type.

Speaker 3 (01:12:29):
That had wandered away from its ship.

Speaker 7 (01:12:31):
It got spotted by the police officer before he went
finally back.

Speaker 6 (01:12:36):
Why wouldn't alien wear a suit.

Speaker 7 (01:12:38):
Because they can't withstand our oxygen? Because they think they
look weird compared to us, Because because because because all
the wonderful things that it does.

Speaker 3 (01:12:47):
Do you think they're self conscious?

Speaker 5 (01:12:48):
Do you think aliens are self conscious?

Speaker 3 (01:12:51):
Might be their higher up being? Do you think they
still have self always. They could be from a lower dimension.
We don't know that, but they can travel with so
they can't be that much lower. Meets some potatoes. Man
who knows.

Speaker 6 (01:13:07):
Meet some potatoes. Nailed it.

Speaker 3 (01:13:10):
So I'm looking to strange brew Yes, where.

Speaker 5 (01:13:14):
We just do an hour in fifteen minutes on I
can summarize a story in forty five.

Speaker 3 (01:13:23):
What do you think? Do you think it was real? Like,
where's your honest thought?

Speaker 5 (01:13:27):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:13:28):
There's barely any information.

Speaker 5 (01:13:30):
He took a picture, he got he told everyone, they
got upset, no one investigated, and he got his life ruined,
and then his ship burned down, and.

Speaker 6 (01:13:41):
Then someone stole his photographs, and.

Speaker 5 (01:13:43):
Then he went on TV interviews saying it was horrible,
and then that's the end of the story.

Speaker 3 (01:13:48):
Do you believe he was telling the truth.

Speaker 5 (01:13:51):
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:13:52):
I don't know if he's nuts. I don't have enough information.
You don't think he was telling the truth.

Speaker 5 (01:13:58):
He might have been, He could have been, you know what.
To be fair, it's fucked up. It's very very hard
to uh to fake coolrooids.

Speaker 3 (01:14:07):
I'll give him that. So whether either if he was.

Speaker 5 (01:14:10):
Telling the truth or be this was insanely elaborate on
his end.

Speaker 3 (01:14:16):
It's one of the two.

Speaker 5 (01:14:20):
And if he was crazy, I don't think he would
have been that elaborate.

Speaker 7 (01:14:24):
Yeah, I know, right, So, like it is weird, I'm
gonna say that he really believes what he saw. God
knows if it was some sort of government experiment or
a guy, a kid on a skateboard.

Speaker 5 (01:14:37):
Yeah, skateboards were yeah, big thing on skateboard.

Speaker 3 (01:14:44):
Alright, ready, Yeah, it's time for that day.

Speaker 7 (01:14:56):
Just so you know, when we do our seven Years
of Strangeness episode, I'm gonna make you do that again.

Speaker 3 (01:15:03):
Oh, I gotta do it. I'm gonna do it like live. Yeah,
I gotta re record it. I'm gonna make you do
it on a live.

Speaker 6 (01:15:14):
Okay.

Speaker 5 (01:15:15):
For their size, okay, barnacles have the longest penis length
of any animal.

Speaker 3 (01:15:33):
Barnacles Okay, I'm gonna have to look this up.

Speaker 5 (01:15:38):
Eight times longer than their body, eight time.

Speaker 7 (01:15:45):
Nine of the weirdest penises in the animal kingdom. Can
we do that instead of barnacles? Okay, I'm gonna show
everybody a barnacle dick.

Speaker 5 (01:15:54):
However, as one of the few cecily animals to copulate,
they face a trade off between reaching more maids and
controlling ever longer penis and turvenent for you they have
it's eight times bigger than their body.

Speaker 7 (01:16:11):
That's what is that classify as a penis because it does,
like I guess it come out and then it it's
their penis.

Speaker 3 (01:16:17):
It works.

Speaker 6 (01:16:18):
It's such sexual.

Speaker 3 (01:16:19):
Organ Oh disgusting, that crazy. It's eight times bigger. Eight.

Speaker 6 (01:16:29):
I don't think you're hearing me.

Speaker 7 (01:16:32):
Eight It doesn't look that big. Eight particles made it.
What the fuck man you? I do not like the
look of these things, fucking nuts.

Speaker 3 (01:16:44):
Oh man as disgusting though I don't like it, and
I like looking at it.

Speaker 5 (01:16:54):
If you think about it, they probably.

Speaker 7 (01:16:56):
This for fun. Nine of the weirdest penises in the
animal Kingdom. Birds have them, bees have them, and the
regular old fleas have them. But in the animal Kingdom,
no penis is exactly like the next what a weird
I know it's true because like it's like bees don't

(01:17:16):
have like a bird's is a kloaco, then that's a
bird vagina.

Speaker 3 (01:17:22):
Them. I'm not going to read the whole thing because
it's kind of funny.

Speaker 7 (01:17:25):
It's like anyways carry down the most scientists the people
have studied penises for a long time, since they've won.

Speaker 3 (01:17:34):
Heads above the rest of man. You want to read this?

Speaker 5 (01:17:42):
I thought that was a food I eat. Have four
headed penises, only two heads are put to.

Speaker 6 (01:17:51):
Use at one time.

Speaker 3 (01:17:52):
What the fuck?

Speaker 5 (01:17:54):
Sometimes this one isn't enough for its scenes for the children.

Speaker 3 (01:17:57):
Oh no, God.

Speaker 5 (01:17:58):
Get handsy, No, next time over?

Speaker 3 (01:18:01):
It is that? What that is?

Speaker 6 (01:18:04):
It's anada, but is a tortillo.

Speaker 7 (01:18:08):
That's not as an chinata. No, that's something different, Billy.

Speaker 6 (01:18:17):
It's something very similar.

Speaker 3 (01:18:19):
I know that when this goes live, because you guys
will know it's live when we.

Speaker 7 (01:18:24):
Actually show your comments and stuff like that. There's gonna
be people. And it's an enchilada, that's what it is.
And you said enchinada. No, it's not enchilata. Oh a
lot of this is okay.

Speaker 3 (01:18:40):
Getting handsy. Dolphins are known to rate people. That's true
ship everywhere.

Speaker 7 (01:18:51):
Dolphins are known for their intelligence, promiscuinity, promiscuinity, and they're
absurdly dexterous penis. They have prehensive, prehensively prehensile penis, meaning
it swirls and grabs and gropes much like a human's hand.

(01:19:12):
Oh my god, prehensile penis helps males navigate the complex
labyrinth like reproductive track of a female dolphin.

Speaker 5 (01:19:22):
That's crazy.

Speaker 3 (01:19:23):
Dolphins don't use their multiple see.

Speaker 7 (01:19:26):
This is why dolphins rape dolphins and dolphins don't use
their penis for baby making either. Bottle nose dolphins frequently
copylate for pleasure, often mating with the same sex. Oh
so they're fucking gay dolphins. Sex doesn't last long, only
ten seconds, but the male can ejaculate multiple times an hour.

Speaker 6 (01:19:47):
It's just like Tom ten seconds Tom, that's what they
call him.

Speaker 7 (01:19:53):
But I can go multiple times, so it's like one
after the other. I'm as constantly come out of the
entire time.

Speaker 6 (01:19:58):
But you're only only a push for.

Speaker 3 (01:20:00):
For minutes of just come. That's it.

Speaker 5 (01:20:06):
Falls.

Speaker 3 (01:20:07):
Yeah, I just have to say this. Okay, so I
didn't know that. I know that dolphins like rape people,
and I know that the Indians almost raped a dolphin
out of existence, so that's a fact. But like the
fact that they don't do that for mating. That like
the people claim that they're intelligent, as their intelligence clarify Indians,
I've already talked about it. They almost raped to a

(01:20:29):
pink dolphin, so they almost well, actually it wasn't it
was Pakistani's.

Speaker 7 (01:20:35):
But it's the same thing they were at one point.
They were at one point India and Pakistan was connected.
They were like was it Hindu stand or whatever, but
they were the same thing at one point.

Speaker 3 (01:20:48):
They're the same people.

Speaker 7 (01:20:48):
They're just like ones love Muslims a little more and
ones love other things a little more.

Speaker 3 (01:20:53):
Hinduism and weird things like that.

Speaker 7 (01:20:55):
But like, there's a pink it's called the pink dolphin,
I think, and it's almost because it has the thing
similar or two of vagina. It's almost have extinction because
they literally fucked it to death. It's a fucking thing
you can look up. But like, my thing is like
to say that it's fine. They claim that dolphins are
as intelligent as humans are, just on a different level

(01:21:18):
or they can like so, I'm like, it's so crazy
that they have been known to like like we say
that word too often, but assault each other in that way.

Speaker 3 (01:21:28):
But it's not even for like having kids. It's not
even of them having kids. It's them like anyways, fencing
with a fall less that's this thing. Okay, you get
flat worm.

Speaker 5 (01:21:39):
The flatworm engages okay on guard. Many animals use their
penises for love, but flatworms also use theirs to fight,
like the reptility Like many organisms with.

Speaker 6 (01:21:53):
I can't my whole screens.

Speaker 3 (01:21:55):
Blurried intriguing fallacies.

Speaker 5 (01:21:57):
Many organisms with intriguing scary like I know what I'm
trying to look in. Everything's fucking blurry. Maybe I do
need to get my eyes checked. Flatworms that engage in
penis fights are hermaphrodites, just one example that showcases how

(01:22:18):
a sex binary system fails to account for the range, fluidity,
and diversity of the many organisms. Some species of flatworms
engage in this duel.

Speaker 3 (01:22:29):
Your eyes like scary. Oh you see your eyes?

Speaker 5 (01:22:35):
I get so close to my screen to see those
so blurry on my end.

Speaker 3 (01:22:39):
Made me cry a little bit because you're just like man.

Speaker 5 (01:22:43):
I can't even read that. For I can't even read that,
Go ahead, read it.

Speaker 8 (01:22:49):
I can't read the first like many organisms with intriguing
phallasis phallas, So yeah, that's weird.

Speaker 3 (01:22:59):
They have two to penis, resembling sports.

Speaker 5 (01:23:04):
And battles can last up to an hour as they
take turns attempting to stab each other. Stab each other,
the winner pierces the flesh of the other flatworm to
deposit the sperm, something scientists refer to as a traumatic insemination.

Speaker 3 (01:23:19):
That's called create. That's crazy.

Speaker 6 (01:23:25):
Mailing can be competitive.

Speaker 3 (01:23:27):
Sting is that a team that's made in l that's
made can be competitive at the screen, I can see it.
I haven't read from my eyes.

Speaker 7 (01:23:38):
That is a fucking lally insane.

Speaker 5 (01:23:43):
Mailing can be I'm saying mailing mating can be competitive
with a flat uh single flatworm fertilizing another. In other cases,
like with the tiger flatworm, they can play both roles.
Each flatworm gives and receive sperms from its partner. Allays
we should carry on the rest of them for another day.

Speaker 3 (01:24:03):
No, we're gonna keep going one more.

Speaker 5 (01:24:05):
We're gonna do the rest of them.

Speaker 7 (01:24:07):
Blue whales are the largest creature to ever roam the earth,
and they are certainly have the faucis to match up.
Blue whales penises range from eight to and to ten
feet with a long diameter. Each of the testes, along
with can weigh up one hundred and fifty pounds and
can ejaculate gallons of semen in one single go. Whale

(01:24:30):
pieces gallons well penises well penises. Whale penises famously oversize
that Moby Dick. Herman Melville suggests using the skin of
a sperm whale's phallus as a floor length apron to
set to tidy while skinning the rest of the whale.

(01:24:50):
YO In the book, he was like, we're gonna the
gallons of semen. In the book Moby Dick, I guess
one of the guys are like, all right, we're gonna
make a apron out of this. I will make an
apron out of his penis skin. So while I'm carving
up the rest of the whale, I don't get more
semens soaked on me.

Speaker 6 (01:25:12):
Dallons.

Speaker 3 (01:25:13):
Okay, okay, we did barnacles. You already do that. Oh
I don't like that thing armed and okay, here you go.
Bed Bugs, bed bugs, Oh fuck?

Speaker 5 (01:25:26):
Bed bugs stabbed their partner Drink Copulation Center of Disease
Control and Prevention. Bed Bugs are famous for their aggressive
stabbing sex. Sometimes, over zealous males kill females with their
super light penis in the process.

Speaker 6 (01:25:41):
I got one of those.

Speaker 3 (01:25:44):
I feel just got stacks. I didn't kill them, I'm honest, man.

Speaker 5 (01:25:53):
I just pulled down a zipper. Willingham explains that this
violent process has caused bed bugs to evolve something very
vagina like where they tend to get stabbed.

Speaker 6 (01:26:05):
This special less.

Speaker 5 (01:26:06):
Armored area of their abdomen might minimize minimize harm as
the male injexas sperm into the female circulatory.

Speaker 3 (01:26:15):
So fucked up, man.

Speaker 5 (01:26:16):
So they developed something other than the vagina that made
it look like a vagina. So you could put your
dick in there and stab them, but it wouldn't kill them,
but it goes into their fucking bloodstream.

Speaker 3 (01:26:28):
Sounds fucked up. Its fucking wild.

Speaker 7 (01:26:33):
So not much shock's william Ham about animal penises. Whoever
that is Willingham anymore, But she says this must be
some sort of doctor and U bioversity heritage library. Sure,
but she says she was surprised to learn about the
microscopic eye liss cave insect, which depends on how scientists

(01:26:56):
understand sex.

Speaker 3 (01:26:57):
Look at this little thing, it's time.

Speaker 7 (01:27:00):
It's as tiny as an eyelash, an eyelash, oh eye
lists eyeliss cave insects. But their microscopic they're tiny, and
they're everywhere. And think about that, you know, the germs
and things we don't see. It's so fucking crazy. So
males of the species have a.

Speaker 3 (01:27:20):
I know, I know.

Speaker 7 (01:27:21):
Males of the species have a vagina like pouch containing sperm,
while females have a special penis like organ that penetrates
in vacuums up of the male sperm. Unlike other species
that use similar processes butterflies, mites, beetles, males of the
species don't have a similar productive organ.

Speaker 3 (01:27:44):
Only females do.

Speaker 7 (01:27:45):
Weird so like they come in and they like this,
this creature thing comes in and it just pierces. They
have like a sperm like the man have just like
a sperm like pouch, and the females like, fuck, let
me get some of that.

Speaker 3 (01:27:57):
Let me get in there.

Speaker 10 (01:27:58):
You know that's right there, good stuff, all right. This
thing a temporary tool, looks like a contract. Half fun
pronouncing this meat fuck.

Speaker 5 (01:28:12):
Chrome mos chromidorus recticulate to a type of sea slug
that has a reckon with a scary reality. Sex means
saying goodbye to their penis at least for the day,
so it.

Speaker 3 (01:28:26):
Comes back for a day.

Speaker 5 (01:28:28):
Whatever that animal is are hermaphrodis and fertilize each other
simultaneously during sex. Each has three centimeter long schlongs. I
love how I said that they only but they only
extend a centimeter of their penis when copulating. After sex,
they shed their single used penis into the oceans of

(01:28:51):
this but this loss doesn't mean their sex sex life
is over. They have at least two more disposable penis
segments hidden away, so it's twenty four hours later a
slug will be back in action, so you can do
three times your life, get to have sex three times
in your life. They're all hermaphrodites, so they're literally like

(01:29:12):
unbinary fucking individuals.

Speaker 6 (01:29:15):
These are the only ones allowed to be part of
this community. Community, by the.

Speaker 3 (01:29:18):
Way, by binary is where they think that they're everything.
Slugs are creepy looking, looks like a little it looks
like a mushroom.

Speaker 5 (01:29:27):
So they inseminate each other so they're both having sex
and they're.

Speaker 3 (01:29:31):
Both just fell off like a bee, like a b Like, I.

Speaker 5 (01:29:36):
Don't believe I'm yelling this right now, So I'm curious
what they think.

Speaker 3 (01:29:41):
It's like, what do you talk about? This guy's nuts.

Speaker 7 (01:29:46):
Sometimes pieces can post lot logistical challenges. That has a
certain case for the le leopard slug, which is so
well endured that it has an extreme measures to reproduce.

Speaker 3 (01:29:59):
Is that leopard? Wow? I said, yeah, maybe it's not
that short, little guy. You know it was not short.

Speaker 7 (01:30:07):
Mating leopard slugs dangled there from their branches by a
shared rope of their own slime, with their penises hanging below.
As hermaphrodites. These slugs incimonate each other during sex. Once
the action starts, two pieces are on display, and their
pieces are easily spotted. They're electric blue and roughly the
same size as the slug in themselves.

Speaker 3 (01:30:29):
You need to go.

Speaker 7 (01:30:32):
You need to just look. You need to go up
and look one up. You can see the videos of
the slug in action here. Okay, all right, I'm going
to show you. I'm gonna share. Can you see it?

Speaker 3 (01:30:49):
I'm watching it right now.

Speaker 7 (01:30:51):
Okay, I have to. Oh it's gross, Okay, I have
to show you. I show you out of it present.
Why is it like letting you share that screen.

Speaker 5 (01:31:02):
Because it knows it's not okay, it's destiny.

Speaker 3 (01:31:08):
Oh there's its WANs bro.

Speaker 5 (01:31:12):
E.

Speaker 3 (01:31:15):
Oh. I do not like slugs at all.

Speaker 5 (01:31:18):
Men who does.

Speaker 3 (01:31:22):
Are just hanging out, they're not doing anything, and then
there comes their other wings. It's fucking disgusting.

Speaker 6 (01:31:31):
Yeah, okay, stop. I don't care.

Speaker 9 (01:31:33):
This is a seven minute long video. Buddy, I'm not
watching you don't watch his luck up, I don't. Oh god,
all right, so that was the last one. So luckily, luckily,
well that was fun.

Speaker 3 (01:31:48):
This is yes, we better. That was actually fun.

Speaker 7 (01:31:54):
That was actually really fun, you know, fun fact episode
like the folk I feel bad for the cop to
be honest, but you know, for this why you listen
to the patreons, why you support the patreon by merch
you can get like shirts like this that I'm wearing
on the merch site. But like, you know what, like

(01:32:15):
I would it would kind of be fun to do
even once in a while, we'll do a fun fact
episode for Patreon where we just find a bunch of
really messed up facts, you know, and then we can
show images and videos of some of these maybe fun facts.

Speaker 5 (01:32:31):
That's literally my gig.

Speaker 6 (01:32:33):
But yeah, sure make an episode.

Speaker 3 (01:32:36):
Maybe one episode. We'll get into it.

Speaker 7 (01:32:38):
That one episode that you let me do a fun fact.
I found a shipload in the matter of like a
couple of seconds, I.

Speaker 5 (01:32:44):
Know, but your good ones, Like, so.

Speaker 3 (01:32:51):
I'm glad we covered that. That was interesting.

Speaker 7 (01:32:55):
It's a nice change and saying all I've talked about
recently is like the world ending in uh glass, immigration
and government and stuff. So all right, well, everybody support
the show. I appreciated obviously, five star rate and reviews,
all that good stuff by merge go the Patreon. Please
support it means the world to us. Find us on Instagram.
I've had a meme go viral. It's got like it's

(01:33:17):
not like two point something million views, So like, support
the show this time.

Speaker 5 (01:33:23):
Fuck you, honestly, hands down, you are the one person
I know that, and just.

Speaker 6 (01:33:28):
Keep going viral. I don't know how to do.

Speaker 3 (01:33:30):
Just keep doing it.

Speaker 5 (01:33:32):
You've done. I know.

Speaker 7 (01:33:34):
I just well my face yelling about the government is
one thing. But like just I've made my own memes
up that have like have helped. The one that I'm
speaking of is not my own. But if you go
through the Strange Podcast Instagram, you just reposted. Most of
the memes that I post on the Strange Podcast Instagram

(01:33:54):
are my own memes. But it's the one you saw
of the uh it's the light save and is it
the Illuminati? Is it the leftist? Is it the globalist?
And then the guy comes in red and he's like,
it's the Jews is like millions upon millions upon millions
of views.

Speaker 3 (01:34:13):
Yeah, and I was like, that's a sawyer said it
to me.

Speaker 7 (01:34:15):
I was like, that's hilarious, so I reposted It's gain
is like a thousand followers.

Speaker 3 (01:34:19):
So we appreciate everything that does that.

Speaker 7 (01:34:21):
But I've also I've also posted very other controversial stuff
with my memes and everything. So it's just easy. I
just think of it and I'm like, this will be funny.
Won't be a lot on TikTok. But Instagram is being
friendly for once, so that's kind of nice. But yeah,
I support the show all that stuff social media. We're
most present on Instagram. I'm trying to be there on

(01:34:41):
x so strange brew cast. People are like, you got
to argue with people on it, so like and then
I'm like, I don't like doing that ship.

Speaker 3 (01:34:47):
I gave it up a long time ago.

Speaker 7 (01:34:53):
And then you start, yeah, i'd start arguing with people
on like political.

Speaker 3 (01:34:58):
Points of views or something like that.

Speaker 5 (01:35:00):
How you.

Speaker 3 (01:35:02):
Yeah, So I appreciate that. Okay, everybody, love everybody. I
guess if you have to, uh so and support the show, motherfuckers. Okay, Haurvoir,
thank you for listening. I appreciate you. Kiss, kiss good night.