May 6, 2025 • 14 mins
In this powerful episode of The Stronger Deeper Marriage Show, we dive into Chapter 1 of my book, That Secret Sauce: Essential Ingredients for Creating an Exceptional Marriage – "Seek God First." Marriage can be challenging, but when we invite God to lead and build our relationship on His foundation, everything begins to shift.
Join me as we discuss how seeking God’s direction strengthens not only our connection with Him but also the bond we share with our spouse. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, disconnected, or like your marriage could use a reset, this episode will inspire you to realign with God’s purpose for your relationship.
Let’s explore how to navigate challenges, grow together spiritually, and create a marriage rooted in faith, love, and divine guidance. Don't miss this heartfelt and transformative conversation!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Lucille Reddic (00:03):
What's going on, everyone?
Welcome to the Stronger, DeeperMarriage Show.
My name is Lucille Reddick andI've been married for over 39
years.
For more than 20 years, I'vebeen coaching married men and
women, as well as those who hopeto get married in the future,
to create blissful marriages.
I travel around the countryspeaking about healthy marriage
(00:24):
relationships, and I am theauthor of That Secret Sauce,
Essential Ingredients forCreating an Exceptional Marriage
book.
This is your go-to source forbuilding a thriving marriage?
filled with long-lastinghappiness, peace, purpose, and
passion.
Join us, whether you're a womanor a man, as we navigate the
(00:48):
journey to a stronger, morefulfilling relationship without
the fear of vulnerability andrejection.
In this episode, I want to talkto you about a section from my
book.
So let's dive in.
We're going to explore Chapter1, Seek God First.
Now, this chapter emphasizesthe importance of seeking God's
(01:11):
direction and strength to builda strong foundation for our
marriage, especially whenchallenges arise.
Chapter 1 opens with a powerfulscripture from Matthew 6, 33.
But seek first his kingdom andhis righteousness, and all these
things will be provided to you.
Now, seeking God first iscrucial because it sets the
(01:35):
foundation for everything thatin our marriage.
When disillusionment begins toset in, remind yourself that God
designed marriage.
Now let me share a personalstory about disillusionment.
Now let's definedisillusionment first.
According to Google'sdictionary, disillusionment is a
(01:58):
feeling of disappointmentresulting from the discovery
that something is not as good asone believed it would be.
And I first felt this in mymarriage within about the first
month.
However, just a couple ofmonths later, I was back to
feeling the love and joy of ourrelationship.
(02:20):
I once heard a speaker atchurch say that marriage has
cycles.
Love comes around and goesaround.
You just have to hang arounduntil it comes back around.
And looking back, I can seeseveral times when we were in
disillusionment, And just asmany times when we were back to
(02:41):
love and joy.
It's true.
Marriage has a cycle.
Now, unfortunately, it'simpossible to stay in a place of
love and joy forever.
But I've realized that whenwe're in disillusionment, it's a
perfect time to put more effortinto our marriage.
(03:03):
Many couples...
gets so discouraged during thistime that it leads to divorce.
Now, while I know there areexceptions, I believe many
marriages could be saved bydoing simple things.
And as an example, if you'reunsure of what to do for your
(03:23):
spouse, focus on their lovelanguage.
You really can't go wrong withthat.
And if you don't know yourpartner's love language, I
encourage you to look it up.
And you can also stay tunedbecause there will be an episode
on love languages.
So now in the subchapter of thefirst chapter of my book, it's
(03:46):
titled Yield to God.
And in that subchapter, wediscuss why it's essential to
yield to God.
Now Psalms 24 and 1 reminds us,the earth is the Lord's and all
it contains, the world andthose who dwell in it.
Recognizing that everythingbelongs to God helps us to set
(04:09):
the right foundation for ourmarriage.
It's easier to give control toGod if we're not holding on to
it ourselves.
How many of you are stillholding on to your marriage?
I was.
I encourage you to give it toGod and become a faithful
(04:31):
steward of your marriagerelationships.
I must admit, I wasn't a goodsteward of my marriage in the
beginning.
It took time and commitment andprayer to become a good steward
of my marriage relationship.
We both had to learn that we'reon the same team.
We have different rolesdepending on what season of life
(04:58):
we're in, but we're bothworking towards the same goals.
Marriage is a marathon, not asprint.
Now, the first marriage in Edenhighlights the characteristics
of a godly marriage where ahusband and wife become one
flesh.
They remain as two individuals,but become one in their
(05:21):
purpose, sharing the samevalues, goals, and outlook.
They work together to build astrong family.
God created humans with aninnate need and desire for the
close bond that marriageprovides.
Yielding to God involvespraying for your spouse, praying
(05:43):
for yourself, praying for thosearound you.
I asked the Lord to help me tosee my spouse the way he sees
him.
Because what I was focused onwas only the things that I
thought were negativecharacteristics.
And I've since discovered thatthose negative characteristics
(06:04):
that I considered to be negativewere actually good because they
balance out my characteristics.
I was really disappointed atthis time that things weren't
going the way I had envisionedthem.
You see, all of the movies andbooks had led me to believe that
(06:24):
my marriage would be happy andblissful all the time.
I wanted everything to besmooth and easy.
I didn't expect conflict.
Looking back on it now, itseems strange.
How could there not beconflict?
(06:46):
We're two different peoplecoming together to mesh our
lives together.
We had to learn how to worktogether on projects, agree on
parenting issues, Learn how toshare similar values on how to
spend and save money withoutarguing about it.
(07:08):
We wanted to learn how to likethe same people and establish
some friendships with othercouples.
And another thing we had tolearn was how to always be ready
for physical intimacy.
And I didn't say we always hadphysical intimacy, but always be
(07:30):
open and ready for it.
These things don't happenovernight.
We might think it would bebetter if we didn't have to work
through our differences.
But I want you to consider thatthe struggle, effort, and
sacrifice actually deepens ourlove for each other.
(07:51):
The struggle is teaching uspatience.
Marriage is a lifelongcommitment that cannot be
rushed.
Just like training and runninga marathon, it requires
dedication and discipline topush through the difficult
(08:11):
times.
Ecclesiastes 9.9 states, enjoylife with the wife whom you love
all the days of your futilelife, which he has given you
under the sun.
Another verse, Malachi 2 and 16reminds us, Now these
(08:45):
scriptures emphasize that God'sdesire is for marriage to be a
lifelong commitment.
Now you might be saying toyourself, Lucille, I hear you,
but I'm not there mentally orspiritually right now.
I understand there was a timewhen I wasn't there either.
(09:11):
Do you want to know whatchanged everything for me?
It was the story of theIsraelites wandering in the
wilderness for 40 years.
God provided for them, but theykept complaining and murmuring.
Their faith wasn't strong.
(09:31):
Deuteronomy 29, five and sixsays that for 40 years, their
clothes and sandals didn't wearout.
Now that verse really spoke tome.
And I know people think, well,that's strange.
That's such an odd verse.
But if God took care ofsomething so small, such as
(09:57):
clothes and shoes or sandals,didn't wear out for 40 years, in
my mind, that was a miracle.
I interpreted that miracle asGod saying, even when things got
difficult for them, he wassaying, I'm still with you.
(10:19):
I haven't left you.
And if he did it for them, Ibelieve he will do it for me.
That realization turnedeverything around for me.
And here we are in our 39thyear of marriage, happier than
(10:40):
when we first got married.
The Lord turned everythingaround for us.
And I'm here to let you knowthat if he did it for us, he can
do it for you.
Now, let me summarize threemain takeaways from what I've
shared with you.
I said, seek God first in yourmarriage, setting the foundation
(11:05):
that seeking God first iscrucial.
This aligns your relationshipwith his purpose and helps you
navigate through times ofdisillusionment with faith and
commitment.
Number two, marriage hascycles.
Embrace and work through them.
Recognize that marriagenaturally goes through cycles of
(11:27):
love and disillusionment.
Embrace these cycles and usechallenging times to put more
effort into your relationship.
Focus on your spouse's lovelanguage and work as a team to
build a stronger bond.
Number three, yield to God andbe a good steward.
Yielding control to God andbecoming a faithful steward of
(11:51):
your marriage can transform yourrelationship.
Pray for your spouse.
Focus on positive traits andunderstand that the struggle and
effort deepen your love andcommitment, leading to a
fulfilling and lasting marriage.
I'd like to pray for ourmarriages right now.
(12:12):
Dear Lord, thank you.
that you first demonstrated tome what love, true love is.
You modeled it by giving yourson, Jesus Christ, as ransom for
our sins.
Lord, give us grace, Father, tolove willingly and continually,
(12:34):
even when we don't feel as ifour spouse is meeting our needs.
Love is not conditional.
Love forgives, love believes,Love endures.
Love never fails.
Thank you for modeling that tous every day.
(12:55):
In Christ's name, amen.
That's a glimpse into chapterone of my book, That Secret
Sauce, Essential Ingredients forCreating an Exceptional
Marriage.
That's all for today's episodeof the Stronger, Deeper Marriage
Show.
Thank you so much for spendingtime with me today.
(13:17):
I appreciate each and every oneof you for tuning in.
If you enjoyed today's episodeplease make sure to like and
subscribe to the show so younever miss an episode and if you
know someone who could benefitfrom our discussion share the
podcast with them.
If you received value fromtoday's episode please tell
(13:40):
others about the show and formore valuable content about
relationships sign up for mynewsletter join us next time as
we continue to explore ways tostrengthen and deepen your
marriage until then keepstriving for a marriage full of
peace purpose and passion untilnext time bye
What's going on, everyone?
Welcome to the Stronger, DeeperMarriage Show.
My name is Lucille Reddick andI've been married for over 39
years.
For more than 20 years, I'vebeen coaching married men and
women, as well as those who hopeto get married in the future,
to create blissful marriages.
I travel around the countryspeaking about healthy marriage
(00:24):
relationships, and I am theauthor of That Secret Sauce,
Essential Ingredients forCreating an Exceptional Marriage
book.
This is your go-to source forbuilding a thriving marriage?
filled with long-lastinghappiness, peace, purpose, and
passion.
Join us, whether you're a womanor a man, as we navigate the
(00:48):
journey to a stronger, morefulfilling relationship without
the fear of vulnerability andrejection.
In this episode, I want to talkto you about a section from my
book.
So let's dive in.
We're going to explore Chapter1, Seek God First.
Now, this chapter emphasizesthe importance of seeking God's
(01:11):
direction and strength to builda strong foundation for our
marriage, especially whenchallenges arise.
Chapter 1 opens with a powerfulscripture from Matthew 6, 33.
But seek first his kingdom andhis righteousness, and all these
things will be provided to you.
Now, seeking God first iscrucial because it sets the
(01:35):
foundation for everything thatin our marriage.
When disillusionment begins toset in, remind yourself that God
designed marriage.
Now let me share a personalstory about disillusionment.
Now let's definedisillusionment first.
According to Google'sdictionary, disillusionment is a
(01:58):
feeling of disappointmentresulting from the discovery
that something is not as good asone believed it would be.
And I first felt this in mymarriage within about the first
month.
However, just a couple ofmonths later, I was back to
feeling the love and joy of ourrelationship.
(02:20):
I once heard a speaker atchurch say that marriage has
cycles.
Love comes around and goesaround.
You just have to hang arounduntil it comes back around.
And looking back, I can seeseveral times when we were in
disillusionment, And just asmany times when we were back to
(02:41):
love and joy.
It's true.
Marriage has a cycle.
Now, unfortunately, it'simpossible to stay in a place of
love and joy forever.
But I've realized that whenwe're in disillusionment, it's a
perfect time to put more effortinto our marriage.
(03:03):
Many couples...
gets so discouraged during thistime that it leads to divorce.
Now, while I know there areexceptions, I believe many
marriages could be saved bydoing simple things.
And as an example, if you'reunsure of what to do for your
(03:23):
spouse, focus on their lovelanguage.
You really can't go wrong withthat.
And if you don't know yourpartner's love language, I
encourage you to look it up.
And you can also stay tunedbecause there will be an episode
on love languages.
So now in the subchapter of thefirst chapter of my book, it's
(03:46):
titled Yield to God.
And in that subchapter, wediscuss why it's essential to
yield to God.
Now Psalms 24 and 1 reminds us,the earth is the Lord's and all
it contains, the world andthose who dwell in it.
Recognizing that everythingbelongs to God helps us to set
(04:09):
the right foundation for ourmarriage.
It's easier to give control toGod if we're not holding on to
it ourselves.
How many of you are stillholding on to your marriage?
I was.
I encourage you to give it toGod and become a faithful
(04:31):
steward of your marriagerelationships.
I must admit, I wasn't a goodsteward of my marriage in the
beginning.
It took time and commitment andprayer to become a good steward
of my marriage relationship.
We both had to learn that we'reon the same team.
We have different rolesdepending on what season of life
(04:58):
we're in, but we're bothworking towards the same goals.
Marriage is a marathon, not asprint.
Now, the first marriage in Edenhighlights the characteristics
of a godly marriage where ahusband and wife become one
flesh.
They remain as two individuals,but become one in their
(05:21):
purpose, sharing the samevalues, goals, and outlook.
They work together to build astrong family.
God created humans with aninnate need and desire for the
close bond that marriageprovides.
Yielding to God involvespraying for your spouse, praying
(05:43):
for yourself, praying for thosearound you.
I asked the Lord to help me tosee my spouse the way he sees
him.
Because what I was focused onwas only the things that I
thought were negativecharacteristics.
And I've since discovered thatthose negative characteristics
(06:04):
that I considered to be negativewere actually good because they
balance out my characteristics.
I was really disappointed atthis time that things weren't
going the way I had envisionedthem.
You see, all of the movies andbooks had led me to believe that
(06:24):
my marriage would be happy andblissful all the time.
I wanted everything to besmooth and easy.
I didn't expect conflict.
Looking back on it now, itseems strange.
How could there not beconflict?
(06:46):
We're two different peoplecoming together to mesh our
lives together.
We had to learn how to worktogether on projects, agree on
parenting issues, Learn how toshare similar values on how to
spend and save money withoutarguing about it.
(07:08):
We wanted to learn how to likethe same people and establish
some friendships with othercouples.
And another thing we had tolearn was how to always be ready
for physical intimacy.
And I didn't say we always hadphysical intimacy, but always be
(07:30):
open and ready for it.
These things don't happenovernight.
We might think it would bebetter if we didn't have to work
through our differences.
But I want you to consider thatthe struggle, effort, and
sacrifice actually deepens ourlove for each other.
(07:51):
The struggle is teaching uspatience.
Marriage is a lifelongcommitment that cannot be
rushed.
Just like training and runninga marathon, it requires
dedication and discipline topush through the difficult
(08:11):
times.
Ecclesiastes 9.9 states, enjoylife with the wife whom you love
all the days of your futilelife, which he has given you
under the sun.
Another verse, Malachi 2 and 16reminds us, Now these
(08:45):
scriptures emphasize that God'sdesire is for marriage to be a
lifelong commitment.
Now you might be saying toyourself, Lucille, I hear you,
but I'm not there mentally orspiritually right now.
I understand there was a timewhen I wasn't there either.
(09:11):
Do you want to know whatchanged everything for me?
It was the story of theIsraelites wandering in the
wilderness for 40 years.
God provided for them, but theykept complaining and murmuring.
Their faith wasn't strong.
(09:31):
Deuteronomy 29, five and sixsays that for 40 years, their
clothes and sandals didn't wearout.
Now that verse really spoke tome.
And I know people think, well,that's strange.
That's such an odd verse.
But if God took care ofsomething so small, such as
(09:57):
clothes and shoes or sandals,didn't wear out for 40 years, in
my mind, that was a miracle.
I interpreted that miracle asGod saying, even when things got
difficult for them, he wassaying, I'm still with you.
(10:19):
I haven't left you.
And if he did it for them, Ibelieve he will do it for me.
That realization turnedeverything around for me.
And here we are in our 39thyear of marriage, happier than
(10:40):
when we first got married.
The Lord turned everythingaround for us.
And I'm here to let you knowthat if he did it for us, he can
do it for you.
Now, let me summarize threemain takeaways from what I've
shared with you.
I said, seek God first in yourmarriage, setting the foundation
(11:05):
that seeking God first iscrucial.
This aligns your relationshipwith his purpose and helps you
navigate through times ofdisillusionment with faith and
commitment.
Number two, marriage hascycles.
Embrace and work through them.
Recognize that marriagenaturally goes through cycles of
(11:27):
love and disillusionment.
Embrace these cycles and usechallenging times to put more
effort into your relationship.
Focus on your spouse's lovelanguage and work as a team to
build a stronger bond.
Number three, yield to God andbe a good steward.
Yielding control to God andbecoming a faithful steward of
(11:51):
your marriage can transform yourrelationship.
Pray for your spouse.
Focus on positive traits andunderstand that the struggle and
effort deepen your love andcommitment, leading to a
fulfilling and lasting marriage.
I'd like to pray for ourmarriages right now.
(12:12):
Dear Lord, thank you.
that you first demonstrated tome what love, true love is.
You modeled it by giving yourson, Jesus Christ, as ransom for
our sins.
Lord, give us grace, Father, tolove willingly and continually,
(12:34):
even when we don't feel as ifour spouse is meeting our needs.
Love is not conditional.
Love forgives, love believes,Love endures.
Love never fails.
Thank you for modeling that tous every day.
(12:55):
In Christ's name, amen.
That's a glimpse into chapterone of my book, That Secret
Sauce, Essential Ingredients forCreating an Exceptional
Marriage.
That's all for today's episodeof the Stronger, Deeper Marriage
Show.
Thank you so much for spendingtime with me today.
(13:17):
I appreciate each and every oneof you for tuning in.
If you enjoyed today's episodeplease make sure to like and
subscribe to the show so younever miss an episode and if you
know someone who could benefitfrom our discussion share the
podcast with them.
If you received value fromtoday's episode please tell
(13:40):
others about the show and formore valuable content about
relationships sign up for mynewsletter join us next time as
we continue to explore ways tostrengthen and deepen your
marriage until then keepstriving for a marriage full of
peace purpose and passion untilnext time bye
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