January 14, 2025 • 16 mins
The episode focuses on the dynamics of becoming a favorite substitute teacher through friendly interactions and storytelling. It discusses strategies for connecting with students, addressing their concerns, and managing the balance between being friendly and maintaining professional boundaries.
• Importance of friendliness in establishing rapport
• Sharing personal stories to connect with students
• Navigating student comparisons with regular teachers
• Handling complaints and student motivations
• Addressing serious family situations with care
• Balancing humor and educational responsibilities
• Final insights on fostering a positive classroom environment
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Greg (00:00):
Greg Collins, episode 276.
It is January 14th 2025.
I tell you what?
I'm going a little bit crazybecause I haven't.
I'm going to go through almost,I guess, five weeks without
substitute teaching because wehad the two-week holiday break.
Then here in Kentucky, alongwith a lot of you, that is, in
(00:24):
the horizontal center of theUnited States, we had another
week off because of weather, andthen me and my wife were
involved with a two-weekvacation in Florida, thank
goodness, but that's a long timeover that substitute teaching.
So I'm recording this on theSaturday prior and then when
(00:45):
this comes out, we're actuallyon the beach and today's topic
is going to be you know, maybeyou have aspirations of being
the favorite and I'm not goingto tell you how to do that.
You got to do it yourself.
But today I'm going to tell youhere's what students are going
(01:08):
to say.
Here's what students are goingto tell you share with you when
you become a favorite substituteteacher.
Substitute Teachers Loud.
All right now, to tell you thetruth, I got the idea for
(01:38):
today's episode on a post that Iread recently on our Substitute
Teachers Lounge Facebook groupSomebody, basically, in my
opinion, teachers LoungeFacebook group.
Somebody.
Basically, in my opinion.
This is the way I read it.
They were bragging about howstern they were in the classroom
and how they never let anybodygo out and just different things
.
And I couldn't help but thinkwell, that's their prerogative.
(02:00):
It's not fair to me to say thatthat is the wrong way to
substitute teach.
It's not the way I choose to go.
I usually choose instead forthe friendliest and, to be
honest, leaving the classroom,somebody says they got to go to
the bathroom.
I ain't going to stop them fromdoing that because I've seen
(02:22):
the result when that happenssometimes, but it made me think
all right, let's flip it fromthe stern side and go over it.
We'll just call it thefriendliest side.
And I think you know the reasonyou become one of the
substitute teachers that kidslove to have in the classroom is
(02:43):
not because you're that greatof a teacher, but it's because
you're that friendly of ateacher I hear over and over.
You know we love it when youshare the personal stories with
us and it's so funny.
I'll blame this.
I am taking Nereva now for mybrain health over the counter
(03:06):
and I tell you it makes me thinkof more stories from my past,
unless I remember stories thathaven't even happened.
But I come up with more andmore stories here lately and
they like to hear those, andonce you reach a level where
you're one of their favoritesubstitute teachers to have in
(03:27):
the classroom, it's justnaturally they're going to be
more comfortable about sharingthings with you.
Now that's what we're going totalk about today, and I'm trying
to think of as manypossibilities as I can.
I'm going to go with theobvious one first, because
(03:49):
sometimes they will imply eitherthat they like a substitute
teacher better than maybe aregular teacher, which isn't
fair, because a regular teacherhas to deal with them every day,
but they're still going to saythings like that.
So you got to be prepared forwhat you're going to say as a
(04:12):
comeback.
Don't agree with them, eventhough you hold yourself in high
regard as a substitute teacher.
Don't tell them that youunderstand what they're talking
about.
Sometimes it's just.
Let me back up a little bit.
I have been in classrooms whereI became a co-teacher because
(04:33):
the math teacher that I wassubstituting for had told
another math teacher hey, duringyour planning, would you mind
to drop in on my class that Gregsubstitute teaching for today
and just walk them through someof these problems.
Not fair to ask Greg to try toaddress that.
(04:54):
Well, she did.
She came in and she was doing aproblem on the board and it
wasn't working out.
A problem on the board and itwasn't working out.
And I saw what the issue wasand I felt guilty, for the kid's
sake, of not correcting her.
So I just said, hey, up thereon step two, wouldn't it be?
(05:16):
And then I went into it and shesaid you're exactly right, and
she's very nice.
She was very nice about it.
She didn't feel like I hadshowed her up or anything about
it.
She didn't feel like I hadshowed her up or anything.
But quite often students willshare with you how they'd rather
have you in a classroom thansomeone else.
Now here's the way I approachthat.
I usually say I know yourteacher, your teacher's great.
(05:39):
Is it at all possible that thereason you're not crazy about
that teacher is because you'renot enjoying the subject or
you're not paying attention?
Or keep in mind that when I'min here I'm just carrying out
(05:59):
for one hour what the teacherhas left behind.
I don't have to be as concernedif I don't want to about your
education.
Your regular teacher has to beassured of that.
So that might be why they pushyou harder, why they insist you
do it this way, because maybethat's the only way they know
that you will be able to learn.
(06:21):
So I don't want to be someonethat you think is better than
your own teacher.
I want to be someone who youenjoy having in the classroom
when your teacher's not around,and then I will encourage them
to do this.
I'll say listen, I'm alwayshere for you.
If you're struggling in a class, you can always let me know.
(06:43):
I'll give you what help I can,but most likely I'll have to end
up directing you to someoneelse.
This teacher wants you to learn.
To someone else this teacherwants you to learn.
Now, occasionally I'll get astudent where they're saying
they might just be making someof this up, but they'll say
stuff like oh, our teacher neverhas things graded on time.
They always pick on me in class.
(07:06):
That's why I don't open upanymore and share my thoughts.
I'm so demotivated in here thatI really don't have any
interest in being successful inthis class.
I'm just not a math person.
They can make up any types ofexcuses and the bottom line is,
when you're faced with asituation as a substitute
(07:28):
teacher where they're makingcomments like that about a
teacher, don't agree with them.
You'll have to figure out waysto motivate that student and to
motivate that student's opinionof their regular teachers.
That's going to come up thefreer they feel like they've
(07:50):
become to talk to you.
That's going to come up.
You might as well be preparedfor it now.
Now, on a more serious note, ifthe students become more and
more comfortable talking to you,they may occasionally share a
family situation, share a familysituation, and you've got to
(08:13):
decide now how you're going todeal with that.
I've heard comments like myfather slapped me last night,
found out that that wasn't trueand the student was really just
doing that for attention.
He said it loud enough for theother kids to hear and some of
(08:36):
them laughed because some ofthem knew his father and they
knew better than that.
But what are you going to dowhen you're faced with that?
You know, here's what I tellthe student.
I said listen, you realize thatright now I'm supposed to have
the school contact socialservices to address this
situation.
And then they always back downand said oh no, I was just
(08:59):
joking, I didn't really meanthat.
I love my dad.
That kind of thing.
You're going to be faced withthat sometime, maybe even more
More seriously, you might besomeone that a student feels
comfortable telling you specificfamily situations and are very
(09:22):
serious about it, and thenyou're going to have to realize
that you're now in a situationwhere you have to tell the
student.
Well, the way I usually word itis, I am not authorized to give
you advice about your family.
I would like to recommend thatyou instead talk to this
(09:44):
counselor, this person.
Do you have someone you trust,like a preacher you could go to,
or just someone from yourchurch or someone that's always
been special to you that wouldhelp you with things like this?
That's what I encourage them todo.
Do not tell your opinion.
(10:05):
It don't even say now, son, I'mnot sure that this really
happened, even though you toldme that, but if it did and then
go into a big, long explanationabout what they should do, don't
ever do that.
That is not your job as asubstitute teacher.
Students will naturally becomefriendlier with you.
(10:26):
If you're friendly with themand then you're faced with a
situation where you may have toaddress that sometime, I would
encourage you to address it likeI do, tell them I'm not
authorized to say anything.
You can be heartfelt for thestudent, but you can't say, well
, here's what I would do if Iwas in that situation, because
(10:48):
it is not your place, and thenmove on from there.
All right, since that was aserious one, let's close with
one that's a little bit morelighthearted, and then I'll get
on with my vacation.
You will constantly if you'rethat friendly person that has a
lot of good.
Now, part of it's my age.
(11:09):
I have a lot of good storiesbecause I lived 66 years, but
the stories I'm sharing for themost part are from high school.
So there's many.
All of us that are substituteteaching has made it through
high school and has our ownstories Because of my age.
Some of mine are funnierbecause of what was allowed.
Like you didn't have to lockthe doors.
(11:30):
Back in my day, we haddesignated smoke areas in our
high school, which just seemsunfathomable now today.
But you've got a lot of storiesto share.
Well, this is the one that I'mthe most guilty of.
They want to hear those stories, those friendly stories, the
(11:52):
stories where they feel likethey are closer to you.
There are some stories that Iwill only share juniors and
seniors, nothing that bad.
It might be like when I had agirlfriend in high school or
something like that, but I don'tfeel it's proper to share that
(12:13):
with the younger age groups.
Or it might be about somedisciplinary action you were
witnessed of or, to be honest, Ihad my few ways that I like to
aggravate not students ingeneral, but my best friends.
Best friends pick at each other, you knock their books out of
their hands, all that kind ofstuff.
You don't have as many booksbeing carried around the hallway
(12:35):
now.
But here's my point.
I share a lot of those stories.
There was one time in a classwhere I know it was middle
school, in fact I think severalyears ago, because I remember
two of the students that were inthe class that said the front
room, they're now juniors inhigh school.
But I got on a roll.
(12:55):
They were laughing, I wascutting jokes.
They were real, it reallyhappened to me.
So that makes them any funnier.
You know, things that actuallyhappen to you that are funny are
much funnier than stuff thatyou're just cracking jokes about
.
So I was sharing all thesestories and then all of a sudden
(13:16):
I'm thinking oh, my goodness,what time is it?
And we were halfway through theclass and I haven't given them
the assignment yet.
Now that will get you introuble.
Now I've had teachers tell methat I could do whatever I
wanted to and they know thestudents like my stories and
some teachers will leave busywork and they don't mind you
(13:39):
sharing extra stories.
I used to say that I almostlike the days where there's only
about 50 minutes worth of classmaterial and then I got 10
minutes just to kind of goof offand to share stories and to be
funny.
That's my kind of thing.
But whatever you do, don'tbecome so comfortable teaching
those kids.
(13:59):
You know, and I'm getting intoelementary school now, so it's
kind of worse because theygiggle at everything.
Don't be so carried away withyour quote.
I'm doing air quotes right now,popularity that you forget.
This is a class you got toteach and make sure that you
stay on top of things.
Maybe lay out the assignmentfirst and sometimes, if I can
(14:24):
look at an assignment and tell,well, this isn't going to take
the whole class period, I willtell them this All right, do
your class work first and if youdo a good job, if you don't
rush through it.
If you do a good job, take theproper amount of time to do it
properly, then we'll do some funstuff at the end.
(14:45):
Sometimes it's just lettingthem get on their phones for a
few minutes if the teacher's allright with that.
Sometimes it's just lettingthem get on their phones for a
few minutes if the teacher's allright with that.
Sometimes it's playing somegames.
Sometimes I'll just startsharing things, and then,
especially again with theelementary school students.
If you share some things at theend of class, you better believe
that they're going to sharesome stories back with you.
It's amazing.
(15:05):
It doesn't matter what storyyou tell them.
There's students in thatclassroom that have similar
stories.
They don't want to just tell astory.
They've got a story as wellthat's probably just as funny or
funnier as the one that I'vejust told.
So I don't think it's wrong towant to be a favorite substitute
(15:28):
teacher.
Obviously you want to with theschool and the teachers, because
that's why they call you backWith the students.
You want them to feelcomfortable when you come in
each day, and that's good.
That's a good thing.
It's all right to be that way.
I'm not going to insist thatyou're that way.
But as you become more and morecomfortable in talking with
(15:49):
those students, they become moreand more comfortable with
talking to you.
Just be prepared for some ofthe things they're getting ready
to share.
Greg Collins, episode 276.
It is January 14th 2025.
I tell you what?
I'm going a little bit crazybecause I haven't.
I'm going to go through almost,I guess, five weeks without
substitute teaching because wehad the two-week holiday break.
Then here in Kentucky, alongwith a lot of you, that is, in
(00:24):
the horizontal center of theUnited States, we had another
week off because of weather, andthen me and my wife were
involved with a two-weekvacation in Florida, thank
goodness, but that's a long timeover that substitute teaching.
So I'm recording this on theSaturday prior and then when
(00:45):
this comes out, we're actuallyon the beach and today's topic
is going to be you know, maybeyou have aspirations of being
the favorite and I'm not goingto tell you how to do that.
You got to do it yourself.
But today I'm going to tell youhere's what students are going
(01:08):
to say.
Here's what students are goingto tell you share with you when
you become a favorite substituteteacher.
Substitute Teachers Loud.
All right now, to tell you thetruth, I got the idea for
(01:38):
today's episode on a post that Iread recently on our Substitute
Teachers Lounge Facebook groupSomebody, basically, in my
opinion, teachers LoungeFacebook group.
Somebody.
Basically, in my opinion.
This is the way I read it.
They were bragging about howstern they were in the classroom
and how they never let anybodygo out and just different things
.
And I couldn't help but thinkwell, that's their prerogative.
(02:00):
It's not fair to me to say thatthat is the wrong way to
substitute teach.
It's not the way I choose to go.
I usually choose instead forthe friendliest and, to be
honest, leaving the classroom,somebody says they got to go to
the bathroom.
I ain't going to stop them fromdoing that because I've seen
(02:22):
the result when that happenssometimes, but it made me think
all right, let's flip it fromthe stern side and go over it.
We'll just call it thefriendliest side.
And I think you know the reasonyou become one of the
substitute teachers that kidslove to have in the classroom is
(02:43):
not because you're that greatof a teacher, but it's because
you're that friendly of ateacher I hear over and over.
You know we love it when youshare the personal stories with
us and it's so funny.
I'll blame this.
I am taking Nereva now for mybrain health over the counter
(03:06):
and I tell you it makes me thinkof more stories from my past,
unless I remember stories thathaven't even happened.
But I come up with more andmore stories here lately and
they like to hear those, andonce you reach a level where
you're one of their favoritesubstitute teachers to have in
(03:27):
the classroom, it's justnaturally they're going to be
more comfortable about sharingthings with you.
Now that's what we're going totalk about today, and I'm trying
to think of as manypossibilities as I can.
I'm going to go with theobvious one first, because
(03:49):
sometimes they will imply eitherthat they like a substitute
teacher better than maybe aregular teacher, which isn't
fair, because a regular teacherhas to deal with them every day,
but they're still going to saythings like that.
So you got to be prepared forwhat you're going to say as a
(04:12):
comeback.
Don't agree with them, eventhough you hold yourself in high
regard as a substitute teacher.
Don't tell them that youunderstand what they're talking
about.
Sometimes it's just.
Let me back up a little bit.
I have been in classrooms whereI became a co-teacher because
(04:33):
the math teacher that I wassubstituting for had told
another math teacher hey, duringyour planning, would you mind
to drop in on my class that Gregsubstitute teaching for today
and just walk them through someof these problems.
Not fair to ask Greg to try toaddress that.
(04:54):
Well, she did.
She came in and she was doing aproblem on the board and it
wasn't working out.
A problem on the board and itwasn't working out.
And I saw what the issue wasand I felt guilty, for the kid's
sake, of not correcting her.
So I just said, hey, up thereon step two, wouldn't it be?
(05:16):
And then I went into it and shesaid you're exactly right, and
she's very nice.
She was very nice about it.
She didn't feel like I hadshowed her up or anything about
it.
She didn't feel like I hadshowed her up or anything.
But quite often students willshare with you how they'd rather
have you in a classroom thansomeone else.
Now here's the way I approachthat.
I usually say I know yourteacher, your teacher's great.
(05:39):
Is it at all possible that thereason you're not crazy about
that teacher is because you'renot enjoying the subject or
you're not paying attention?
Or keep in mind that when I'min here I'm just carrying out
(05:59):
for one hour what the teacherhas left behind.
I don't have to be as concernedif I don't want to about your
education.
Your regular teacher has to beassured of that.
So that might be why they pushyou harder, why they insist you
do it this way, because maybethat's the only way they know
that you will be able to learn.
(06:21):
So I don't want to be someonethat you think is better than
your own teacher.
I want to be someone who youenjoy having in the classroom
when your teacher's not around,and then I will encourage them
to do this.
I'll say listen, I'm alwayshere for you.
If you're struggling in a class, you can always let me know.
(06:43):
I'll give you what help I can,but most likely I'll have to end
up directing you to someoneelse.
This teacher wants you to learn.
To someone else this teacherwants you to learn.
Now, occasionally I'll get astudent where they're saying
they might just be making someof this up, but they'll say
stuff like oh, our teacher neverhas things graded on time.
They always pick on me in class.
(07:06):
That's why I don't open upanymore and share my thoughts.
I'm so demotivated in here thatI really don't have any
interest in being successful inthis class.
I'm just not a math person.
They can make up any types ofexcuses and the bottom line is,
when you're faced with asituation as a substitute
(07:28):
teacher where they're makingcomments like that about a
teacher, don't agree with them.
You'll have to figure out waysto motivate that student and to
motivate that student's opinionof their regular teachers.
That's going to come up thefreer they feel like they've
(07:50):
become to talk to you.
That's going to come up.
You might as well be preparedfor it now.
Now, on a more serious note, ifthe students become more and
more comfortable talking to you,they may occasionally share a
family situation, share a familysituation, and you've got to
(08:13):
decide now how you're going todeal with that.
I've heard comments like myfather slapped me last night,
found out that that wasn't trueand the student was really just
doing that for attention.
He said it loud enough for theother kids to hear and some of
(08:36):
them laughed because some ofthem knew his father and they
knew better than that.
But what are you going to dowhen you're faced with that?
You know, here's what I tellthe student.
I said listen, you realize thatright now I'm supposed to have
the school contact socialservices to address this
situation.
And then they always back downand said oh no, I was just
(08:59):
joking, I didn't really meanthat.
I love my dad.
That kind of thing.
You're going to be faced withthat sometime, maybe even more
More seriously, you might besomeone that a student feels
comfortable telling you specificfamily situations and are very
(09:22):
serious about it, and thenyou're going to have to realize
that you're now in a situationwhere you have to tell the
student.
Well, the way I usually word itis, I am not authorized to give
you advice about your family.
I would like to recommend thatyou instead talk to this
(09:44):
counselor, this person.
Do you have someone you trust,like a preacher you could go to,
or just someone from yourchurch or someone that's always
been special to you that wouldhelp you with things like this?
That's what I encourage them todo.
Do not tell your opinion.
(10:05):
It don't even say now, son, I'mnot sure that this really
happened, even though you toldme that, but if it did and then
go into a big, long explanationabout what they should do, don't
ever do that.
That is not your job as asubstitute teacher.
Students will naturally becomefriendlier with you.
(10:26):
If you're friendly with themand then you're faced with a
situation where you may have toaddress that sometime, I would
encourage you to address it likeI do, tell them I'm not
authorized to say anything.
You can be heartfelt for thestudent, but you can't say, well
, here's what I would do if Iwas in that situation, because
(10:48):
it is not your place, and thenmove on from there.
All right, since that was aserious one, let's close with
one that's a little bit morelighthearted, and then I'll get
on with my vacation.
You will constantly if you'rethat friendly person that has a
lot of good.
Now, part of it's my age.
(11:09):
I have a lot of good storiesbecause I lived 66 years, but
the stories I'm sharing for themost part are from high school.
So there's many.
All of us that are substituteteaching has made it through
high school and has our ownstories Because of my age.
Some of mine are funnierbecause of what was allowed.
Like you didn't have to lockthe doors.
(11:30):
Back in my day, we haddesignated smoke areas in our
high school, which just seemsunfathomable now today.
But you've got a lot of storiesto share.
Well, this is the one that I'mthe most guilty of.
They want to hear those stories, those friendly stories, the
(11:52):
stories where they feel likethey are closer to you.
There are some stories that Iwill only share juniors and
seniors, nothing that bad.
It might be like when I had agirlfriend in high school or
something like that, but I don'tfeel it's proper to share that
(12:13):
with the younger age groups.
Or it might be about somedisciplinary action you were
witnessed of or, to be honest, Ihad my few ways that I like to
aggravate not students ingeneral, but my best friends.
Best friends pick at each other, you knock their books out of
their hands, all that kind ofstuff.
You don't have as many booksbeing carried around the hallway
(12:35):
now.
But here's my point.
I share a lot of those stories.
There was one time in a classwhere I know it was middle
school, in fact I think severalyears ago, because I remember
two of the students that were inthe class that said the front
room, they're now juniors inhigh school.
But I got on a roll.
(12:55):
They were laughing, I wascutting jokes.
They were real, it reallyhappened to me.
So that makes them any funnier.
You know, things that actuallyhappen to you that are funny are
much funnier than stuff thatyou're just cracking jokes about
.
So I was sharing all thesestories and then all of a sudden
(13:16):
I'm thinking oh, my goodness,what time is it?
And we were halfway through theclass and I haven't given them
the assignment yet.
Now that will get you introuble.
Now I've had teachers tell methat I could do whatever I
wanted to and they know thestudents like my stories and
some teachers will leave busywork and they don't mind you
(13:39):
sharing extra stories.
I used to say that I almostlike the days where there's only
about 50 minutes worth of classmaterial and then I got 10
minutes just to kind of goof offand to share stories and to be
funny.
That's my kind of thing.
But whatever you do, don'tbecome so comfortable teaching
those kids.
(13:59):
You know, and I'm getting intoelementary school now, so it's
kind of worse because theygiggle at everything.
Don't be so carried away withyour quote.
I'm doing air quotes right now,popularity that you forget.
This is a class you got toteach and make sure that you
stay on top of things.
Maybe lay out the assignmentfirst and sometimes, if I can
(14:24):
look at an assignment and tell,well, this isn't going to take
the whole class period, I willtell them this All right, do
your class work first and if youdo a good job, if you don't
rush through it.
If you do a good job, take theproper amount of time to do it
properly, then we'll do some funstuff at the end.
(14:45):
Sometimes it's just lettingthem get on their phones for a
few minutes if the teacher's allright with that.
Sometimes it's just lettingthem get on their phones for a
few minutes if the teacher's allright with that.
Sometimes it's playing somegames.
Sometimes I'll just startsharing things, and then,
especially again with theelementary school students.
If you share some things at theend of class, you better believe
that they're going to sharesome stories back with you.
It's amazing.
(15:05):
It doesn't matter what storyyou tell them.
There's students in thatclassroom that have similar
stories.
They don't want to just tell astory.
They've got a story as wellthat's probably just as funny or
funnier as the one that I'vejust told.
So I don't think it's wrong towant to be a favorite substitute
(15:28):
teacher.
Obviously you want to with theschool and the teachers, because
that's why they call you backWith the students.
You want them to feelcomfortable when you come in
each day, and that's good.
That's a good thing.
It's all right to be that way.
I'm not going to insist thatyou're that way.
But as you become more and morecomfortable in talking with
(15:49):
those students, they become moreand more comfortable with
talking to you.
Just be prepared for some ofthe things they're getting ready
to share.
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!