November 25, 2025 • 38 mins
Sometimes after a movie is successful, a sequel is made to further the adventures with the characters in that world. Many times that story is bad (but not always). Sometimes it is an outright embarrassment. In this episode Jason and Dee breakdown their list of the bad decisions, poorly casted, money-grabbing, worst sequels of the 1980s! Join us for a fun discussion on all things cringy, dopey and overall dumb. Does our list match your list? Buckle up!
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:14):
Hello everybody, and welcome back to the Surely You Can't
Be Serious Podcast. We are here with another top five episode,
and this is a little unusual because it's really a
bottom five episode. Right.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
We don't typically like to be haters, but we don't,
but sometimes there are movies that deserve it. That's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Yeah, yeah, so you will not hear us hate on
movies very often. When we pick movies to cover, we
pick movies we like.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
Generally we pick winners.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Yeah. Exceptions to that rule so far have been Jaws
The Revenge versus Superman four, two movies that both came
out the same year that were absolutely dismal for an
otherwise impressive franchise. Then we're gonna have another couple of
movies in the future. We're going to be teaming up
with some friends, gonna cover Last Action Hero, which is
(01:05):
a movie you walked out of I did, and then
that versus Alien three, yes, which I don't think I
walked out of that one, but I did walk out
of whatever the fourth one was where she had an
alien baby. At the alien baby scene, I was like,
I'm done.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, yeah, we'll talk about that here in the next
couple of weeks with the guys from the Film By podcast. Yeah,
and actually we talked with them about Superman four versus
Chara Revenge. We call it What the Heck Happened Series.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Yes, so this is our top five of what the
heck Happened from the eighties sequels.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Now important to note we recently did an episode with
another podcast called pop Culture Yearbook. Yeah, that's right, and
we covered the best sequels of the eighties. And the
rules on that game were that the sequels had to
have come out sometime between nineteen eighty and nineteen ninety nine, right,
(02:03):
and it was more like a draft type of thing.
So we had three guys from the podcasts and us too.
So those three guys were Brad, Pete and Giff and
we picked the best sequels of the eighties. But today
we are going to be picking the worst sequels of
the eighties. Yes, enjoy this episode and then go check
(02:24):
out that episode we did with them again. That podcast is.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Called pop Culture Yearbook.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
There you go. So the only rule that we are keeping, yes,
is that the movie has to come out sometime during
the eighties yesteen eighty to nineteen eighty nine. And again
it's going to be like our normal top five. Jason
has five, I have five. They might overlap, they might
be a sequel from another franchise. I don't know. We
will see.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
We don't know what each other's lists are.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Yeah, but like our other top five episodes, what we're
going to do is we're going to drop little bread
calms and see if we can get the other guy
to guess what movie it is that we're talking about. Right,
are you ready to jump in?
Speaker 2 (03:00):
I'm ready to jump in. Let's do five, four, three, two,
honorable mentioned autible mention number one. Yes, just like our
top five lists before, exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Okay, all right, I'm gonna let you go first. It's time.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
All right, d my number five Top five. I don't
know how to say this the right way. So this
is the fifth worst sequel of the eighties.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Five.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Now, some people are gonna fall out of their chair
when I say this.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Okay, okay, this was released.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
December eleventh, nineteen eighty five. Okay, this is a sequel.
So here's the tricky part. Part of me is like,
that's the worst sequel I've ever seen. The other part
of me is like, I loved the first movie and
this was the biggest disappointment I've ever had. Okay, So
December eleventh, nineteen eighty five, the budget on this one
twenty five million. It made ninety six million dollars. So
(03:52):
this is a hit movie.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Wow, okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Now, then the star of this movie tried to back
out at the last minute.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Okay, the other star.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Like, there's two main people in this movie. The other
star was the producer, and he went to the studio
and the studio threatened to sue her for like twenty
five million dollars if she drops out. And so the
main male lead had to be the go between between
his female co star and the studio to keep her
from being sued. It was a total disaster before I
(04:27):
got off the ground, any idea what I'm talking about?
Speaker 1 (04:30):
I give up?
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Okay, I'll give you this hint.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
The best thing to come from this movie is the
number two hit song when the Going Gets Tough by
Billy Oshin.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
I don't know, I don't know, No, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Okay. This is the sequel to Romancing the Stone. This
movie is called Jewel of the Nile.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Oh wow, I.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Got no pot Jack Coltman Chom Wild were romance and
a new kind of stone, all the jew him up
the nile.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
I practically got it in my hands.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
The only thing stopping me this quick shot a ripe
and stole it with him.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Okay, yeah, no, cass. So Kathleen Turner was like, this
is dumb.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I'm Kathleen Turner said. When she started to read the script,
She's like, this sucks. I want out. And Michael Douglas
is the producer on the movie. Yeah, And so she's
getting ready to screw him over. And so he said, listen,
calm down, I'll go to the studio. We'll rewrite this.
It'll be good. So they literally sat down with three
(05:32):
different scripts. He and Kathleen Turner sat down on the
ground and they decided, okay, well keep this. No, that's out. No,
this is in and that's out. And it was just
a disaster. I tried to watch this last night. Yeah,
for as good, literally as good as Michael Douglas, A
List Starr and Danny DeVito super funny, and Kathleen Turner
beautiful at the moment they could do nothing with this
(05:56):
dog around their neck.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
Really, it was awful, I guess. I mean I saw
it in the eighties and I was a kid, so
I just I guess I enjoyed it in the eighties.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Okay, so here's the deal. Spoiler. Okay, if you haven't
seen Jewel the Nile, it came out forty years ago.
The Jewel is a man, which my twelve year old
self stood up in the theater. I'm like, what the
what are you talking about? I want my money back?
This is bull crap. Okay, So that's my number five.
(06:25):
So you don't remember that.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
One, now, I mean I don't remember the movie. I
just remember thinking of a good movie. So okay, I
couldn't have been alone. Obviously, there were you know, is
ninety five million. It's not a bad showing. It's true's tough.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
By the way, Michael Douglas, Danny DeVito, and Kathleen Turner
do go on to star in One of the Roses
in nineteen eighty nine.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
I do remember that. I remember watching that one in
the theater and not being impressed. Terrible, not being impressed
at all. Yeah, okay, okay, so here we go my
number five. The star of this particular movie is now
pretty routinely an actor who is in pretty close to
Christian movies. Like a lot of the you know, Christian
(07:11):
pushed movies, but at the time that he made this movie,
he was pretty well out of his mind on coke,
as was several of the other actors in the movie. Okay,
the actor who had played the lead in the first
two of these movies said, Mesistopheles himself could not have
(07:32):
pulled me in to make this movie. He almost didn't
make part two. But they made Part three, and it
was so bad that when they made Part four, which
was also horrible, they pretended like three didn't even exist.
It was. It was the characters became entirely different people
(07:54):
with different backgrounds. It was like number three never happened.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I know what this is. I know what it is.
It's Jaws three, three D.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
You got it.
Speaker 4 (08:04):
With the first you were too terrified to go back
in the water. Just when you were starting to think
it was safe, along came the second. Now nature's most
terrifying creature has returned in an all new adventure, Jaws three.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
This movie was the first movie I ever saw that
I walked out of the movie, and it was not
my doing. I didn't. I mean, I was a little kid.
I had no idea, but my Dad was like, okay,
come on, we're leaving, and I'm like, you could do that.
I thought you had to watch to the end. I
thought that was the rule.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Okay, So here's the deal. I talked to Jeff Johnson
with the Philby podcast about this the other day. Yes,
we've covered Jaws one, they've covered Jaws two. We together
have covered Josh four. We have got to get together
and talk about Joss three at some point.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Okay, good, okay, So we're onto my number four.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
Four?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
All right. This movie was released November twenty first, nineteen
eighty four. Sorry, def Dave black Eye for nineteen eighty
four on this one, Sonya, Yes, no, it's not right.
That was a good guess though, that was very close.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
Fifth category? Am I am I wrong? Category?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
That's true? It is not that Okay. This had a
whopping eight percent on Rotten Tomatoes. This one two razzies
and literally is responsible for the selling of this franchise
to the Canon group.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Is this Superman three?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
This is not Superman three?
Speaker 1 (09:57):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
This is.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
A girl.
Speaker 6 (10:03):
Alexander Sulkind presents the action packed adventures of a dazzling
new superhero, starring Peter o'too I.
Speaker 5 (10:10):
Must be sent to the phantom zone.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
They Dunaway mea Farah Venus ring ridden of a caro Mark.
Speaker 6 (10:21):
McClure, that's Clark Kent's cousin hert Buckner, and introducing Helen
Slater as super Girl. Adventure runs in the family.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Oh right, right of course, yes, so there you go.
Oh yeah, and questionable whether Supergirl is worse or Superman
four quests for peace.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
There is no question. This is worse.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Is worse for sure?
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Okay, now listen to this. I got some tidbits for
you on this. They Dunaway was cast as the stupid
Witch in this movie. They wanted Dolly Parton. Demi Moore
was almost cast as Lucy Lane in this movie. Lucy
Lane is Lois's sister.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Oh right right.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Helen Slater is Supergirl. She's twenty years old. None of
this is her fault. She has no real superpower. She
can fly, but like she changes clothes magically and her
hair changes colors. This makes no sense. A total dog yeah,
absolute disaster and literally caused the Superman franchise to fall
(11:26):
in the Cannon Group's hands. Wow, in which they promptly
turned around and made Superman four, which we'll talk about.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Here in a minute.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Okay, all right, all right back to you, sir.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Okay, this one that I'm about to talk to talk
about it was the beginning of the end for the franchise,
but somehow it did not stop them. Okay, so still
had as the lead, the lead from Part one and
Part two and part three, but this was part four,
and it was the beginning of the dismal results that
(12:00):
were Part four, Part five and Part six. And you're
gonna hurt.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
My feelings if this is what I think it is.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Yeah, this is the one where everybody went, Wait a minute,
Steve Gutenberg is terrible? How did he? How's he been
a star? How do we get him in cocoons? Oh?
Speaker 2 (12:19):
My gosh, the goots? Yeah, this is the fourth Police
Academy movie.
Speaker 3 (12:26):
Graduates in Police Academy. I wonder to welcome all.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Of you citizens.
Speaker 7 (12:36):
The Police Academy has offered to train you citizen here.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
You don't think I'm facked.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
You know, if any won't do you.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
To better protect yourself?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Do we get to pack heat a car, thecho card,
money chairs, sitting mat Jo, my dollar, sweet Chi that's it?
Speaker 6 (13:01):
And Tackleberry good idea?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Citizens on Patrol, Citizens Cop, Citizens on Patrol, unfunny from
beginning to end.
Speaker 4 (13:12):
It.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
I saw this in the theaters me.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Too, and at ten years old, I thought it was hysterical.
Go back and watching it, I was just like, what
could I possibly have found? Funny?
Speaker 8 (13:21):
Man?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
Okay, so I haven't seen this since eighty seven, but
I walked out of the theater going, that was freaking funny.
All right, Back to me for my number three three,
I'll eat my shoes. If you've seen this movie.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
This movie is a sequel that came out in nineteen
eighty five to a movie that we've covered on the
Shirley Can't Be Serious Podcast eighty five came out in
eighty five. Okay, now listen to this. The subtitle for
this movie is called Your Sister Is a Werewolf.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Nope, okay.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
This stars Reb Brown, who played Captain America in the
nineteen seventy nine version.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Okay, Yeah, you've got jud Omen who played Mickey in
Peewee's Big Adventure, the guy who hitches a ride and
he's running from the cops.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Okay, you're gonna have to keep going, my friend, I've
got nothing.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
This is the big dropper. For you ready for this?
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Uh huh.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
It also stars Marcia Hunt, who was married to Mick Jagger.
She's a black woman. She was the source for the
song brown Sugar.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Wow. Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
It also stars Sybil Danning as Queen Sturba, who is
the Queen Werewolf. This is the Howling to Part two
Potty Time.
Speaker 7 (15:03):
It's no rocking Shock new Way, oh hard, no howling too.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
I can say that I've seen parts of this, very
specific parts.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Okay, so we have to talk about that part, right,
Sybil Danning. You don't hire for a great acting ability.
You hire her because she has amazing boobs, right, And
the director of this movie is like, okay, let's go top,
let's take it off. And she's like, no, I'm not
doing I'm tired of doing boom shots. Uh huh. And
he's like, no, you have to. It's part of your contract.
You gotta do it. So she said, all right, listen,
(15:44):
I'm gonna do this one time. So she rips off
her shirt one time in the movie, and then they
copy and paste it seventeen times in the closing credits.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
Yep, rip, rip rip.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
You have lines like I told you we'd get these fuzzballs.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Ah, that is great.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
Okay, over to you, my good man.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Okay, so we're to my number three.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
You're number three, all right.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
This movie came out in nineteen eighty three, forty years ago. Okay.
The star of this movie said that his favorite director
to work with was the director of this movie because
he knew how to make me look the best on screen. Okay.
The director also had a movie came out in eighty
(16:35):
three that was absolutely fantastic, that was a number three
in the series. Okay, I don't know what it is yet.
The director had her brother who had a song on
the album how about you got it now?
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Uh, we queue up Frank Stallone Far from over. This
is Staying Alive.
Speaker 8 (17:00):
Pictures presents John Travolta. You know, Robert Stigwood production, a
Sylvester Stallone film, Staying a Lot.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Yeah, so Sylvester Stallone John Travolta's favorite director to work
with because Sylvester Stallone knew how to make John Travolta
look good on the screen.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Oh, that's interesting.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
What is also interesting is that this got a wopping
four point seven on IMDb, so he couldn't have either.
He didn't look that good or the looking good didn't
make enough difference for such a terrible, terrible script.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I have never seen this movie. Oh yeah, but here's
the deal. You and I both hated Saturday Night Fever.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Well, yeah, so, I mean the thing is that as
bad as Saturday Night Fever was, this is worse. This
is worse. Yeah. I actually when we first started watching
Saturday Night Fever, I was like, where's the part where
he says I'm going to go strut? It turns out
that was my memory from watching Staying Alive and that
didn't happen until that next movie.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Okay, quick note on Staying Alive number one. I know
our good buddy John Reid likes this movie.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
John Reid, who also likes Alien three.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Exactly right. I do know that Cynthia Rhodes aka Rosanna
and Penny from Dirty Dancing was in this movie, and
I know that she met her husband Richard Marx on
the set of Staying Alive.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
All right, that is very cool, now, but that's Patrick
Swayze is in the movie Dancing in White Suspenders again
with Cyncia and Cynthia Rhodes.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Crazy again with Cynthia Rhods.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
Yeah, yes, exactly you know from the Toto video exactly
in your Dreams. And also Richie Sampora is in the movie.
He is a member of Frank Stallone's band. Whenever Tony
Manero visits Jackie at the rehearsals at the club.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Oh, I'm watching this movie. Now, that's it.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I've got to watch this movie. You dig it the most, baby,
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Another movie where the best thing that came out of
this was the song Okay, I wean know to my
number two.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
You're number two.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Two My number two was released August twelfth, nineteen eighty three.
This is another movie that made me stand up in
the theater and point and say, what the f is
going on? This is absolute abomination.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Problem with this is this was like the eighth movie
in the series of a very successful series that you
and I both talked about how much we like. Okay,
the star of the series died, and this is the
second attempt to reboot the series without him but maintaining
the character.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
I got nothing, man, this is good. Keep going, okay, Okay.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
The star of this particular movie is another actor that
we've talked about. He played James Bond in the eighties.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Oh, is this the Pink Panther. This is the return
of the Pink pant Curse of the Pink Panther, of
the Pink Panther. That's right.
Speaker 5 (20:23):
Introducing Ted Was as a detective sergeant Clifton Slay and
Blake Edwards Curse of the Pink Panther.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
This is my big chance, don't it?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Where Inspector Clouseau quote unquote has plastic surgery and is
played by a clumsy, ridiculous French accent Roger Moore.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
That's right. Well, I can tell you that what I
remember of this movie involved grapes, yes, because that's what
I was concerned about whenever I was a kid, was
the naked ladies squishing the grapes with their toes.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
God was that in this one or was that in
the previous one?
Speaker 8 (21:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I think that was I think that.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Wow, I do remember that scene.
Speaker 7 (21:06):
Though.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
I do know that Blake Edwards like they changed the
release date of this movie and it violated his contract,
and so he sued the studio and then they sued
him and it was this big legal battle. Either way,
it was this huge decise. How do you make two
Pink Panther movies? Keeping in spectracluzoh and not and Peter
(21:29):
Sellers is dead and buried.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Yeah, that's bad. It's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
It's insane, terrible, terrible. Okay, that's a good choice to
your number two, sir. All right, My number two is
a number two, okay. Came out of nineteen eighty eight.
This might be my number one.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
I'm confident that it is.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Okay, we can we can talk together.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Can dispense with the with the guessing. At this point,
I am confident that this is your number one. Okay,
we can move on and go straight into your number
one because we're at your number one, right, this is.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Got Oh yeah, we gotta do honorable mentions, all.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Right, so before we get to this one, which is
my number two, go.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Ahead, you're number one.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yes, We've got honorable mentions. So I'm gonna let you
go on the honorable mentions. Okay.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
My first honorable mention D came out the summer of
nineteen eighty seven. We did a whole podcast on this movie.
This movie nearly and I mean nearly killed this franchise
that was an American icon because this movie was so bad.
Released in nineteen eighty seven, they ran out of money,
and so the poor actor who we all adore in
(22:35):
this role had to look really hard at the Great
Wall of China and rebuild it.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
So this is interesting because my number two is your
number one, and my number one is your honorable mentions. Okay,
this is this is the question for more money. This
is Superman.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yes, absolutely it is. The Canon group purchased this because
the Salkinds got in so much trouble with Supergirl.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Then they turn around and they have been hamorrhaging like
ninety million dollars a year, so they have to cut corners.
The budget for this Superman movie was seventeen million dollars.
How do you make a big budget Superman movie for
seventeen million bucks?
Speaker 1 (23:18):
You don't. You make a terrible, terrible thing.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Yes, they had a pretty good start. They had Gene Hackman,
they had John Cryer, they had Margo Kidder. And then
they turn around and do things like Superman is flying
and intentionally drops Margo Kidder. It gives her our heart attack?
Remember that?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Yes, Uh, it's so bad. Guys, go back and check
out our Superman four versus Jaws The Revenge.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Yes, yes, my second honorable mention is a part three
to a movie that we have discussed in season one.
This movie was literally the second biggest movie of nineteen
seventy seven.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
So by the time this rolls out in the year
nineteen eighty three again and the main character is not
in this movie, it's baffling to me that somebody says,
keep going, let's do this. So here's what they do.
They doubled down. Excuse me, they triple down, and they
make the Smoky the bandit also literally with no bandit's
(24:22):
this is smoking the Bandit. Part three. Jerry Reid was
the bandit.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Yeah, he played. He steps into the bandit position and
it is not a good it's not a good fit.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
No.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
In fact, he had to come in at the last
minute because originally Jackie Gleason was playing the bandit and
then but he was also playing the smoky and he's
also playing like his cousin, Canadian cousin Jackie Gleason had
multiple parts and the audience got confused, so they brought
in Jerry Reid to play the bandit the last second.
It was a complete disaster and they should have just
(24:54):
dropped it. Okay, onto your honorable mentions.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
Sir, Okay, So this is a sea cool to a
movie that we have talked about before. We've talked about
the original movie before, not in a full episode context,
but I know that I've brought it up before because
there's a scene in the middle of that movie where
they're in a graveyard and one of the members of
(25:18):
the punk band, one of the female members played by
incredible actress Lena Quigley, who seems to lose her clothes
in quite a horror movies, gun Blisser manages to lose
her clothes in this movie as well. As she's stripping
to song, somebody's playing out of a boombox in the cemetery.
And I think I brought this up because I was
(25:40):
literally at the Vinyl record store and this song starts
playing over the pa and I'm like, no, this song.
Where do I know this song from? And the guy's like,
you know it from Return of the Living Dead And
I was like, oh, yeah, I've only seen that one part.
He's like, yep, that's the same part that everybody else
has seen. But that Return of the Living Dead was
(26:02):
not a bad movie. I mean, it's a seven point three.
It's a good movie. The Return of the Living Dead
Part two five point seven came out in nineteen eighty eight,
and it is a dismal, dismal follow up. Oh man,
could have been a pretty good series of movies.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Wow, Okay, that's good. I've never seen that one. Nineteen
eighty eight. Huh yep, thirty five years ago.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, don't bother with part two. Just go back to
part one which came out, and go back to part one,
which came out in eighty five. The perfect time to have,
you know, punk heads stripping in a cemetery. Okay, okay,
this one is for you, sir.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Okay, this is your second honorable mention.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
This is my second honorable mention, not because the first
one was great, although it did. It did launch the
career of a director that we've talked about before. Okay,
and oddly enough, in a movie where he was parodying
a movie that of a big director at the time
who then said, Hey, I want you to come direct
a movie that I'm producing. But the part two of
(27:07):
the series nearly ended the career of one of your
favorite directors before it ever got started.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
I know what this is. Yes, this is Piranhatu, the Spawning.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Hey, I watched this movie and I don't think it's
all that bad.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Well, James Cameron thought it was terrible. James Cameron did think,
and James Cameron got like fired halfway through or quit
halfway through, depending on which version you listened to. Like,
he was there with no money, not for the movie,
not for himself. He was stealing food off of the
carts that people left out at the hotel room. That's
how that's how down to the dirt he was. And yeah,
(27:50):
I he luckily managed to escape what could have been
a dismal career ending movie by just kind of disclaiming
and saying this wasn't really me.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
Right, he said when he got the phone call that
he was fired, he was painting rubber fish in his
hotel room, like working around the clock to try and
make this turn into something good.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Jeff Johnson and I have talked about this. We both
like this movie. Wow, it's actually okay.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
No, it's not. This movie got a three point eight.
Oh yeah, okay, so we are on to our number ones.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
One of the good things about Prontutude the Spawning though,
that's when Lance Hendrickson meets up with James Cameron and
he goes on to play Bishop and Aliens.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Yeah, and is the He is the guy who James
Cameron had set up to play the terminator and comes
in dressed as the terminator for the producers, bust through
the door, gun in hand, and they're like, what the heck? Yeah,
almost ruined that one too, that's true. Yeah, that's good
(28:55):
all right. So now here we are to number back
to number ones. And I know what yours is?
Speaker 2 (29:00):
No Jerseys.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
One, right, So yours is Caddyshack too.
Speaker 5 (29:12):
Ladies and a gentlemen, let's get ready to remember what
goes around comes around. Welcome back to Caddyshack.
Speaker 9 (29:25):
Hey, ty, you're looking well, Hey, nice to see if
any ted whatever?
Speaker 5 (29:29):
Bushwood Country Club, So you want to join old Bushwood,
where snowbery is a way of life.
Speaker 1 (29:35):
We just don't feed your Bushwood material. I want to
bite Bushwood Country Club.
Speaker 5 (29:39):
Let me ask you this, honest. But now it's members
are gonna get what they deserve.
Speaker 4 (29:45):
What do you think is it great?
Speaker 10 (29:47):
That's grat h out.
Speaker 5 (29:49):
God, the shack is back.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Our members will never stand for this.
Speaker 10 (29:56):
It's a story of high culture.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Who I was looking? Bodygrip?
Speaker 7 (30:01):
No, No, that loose stuff.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
You put your.
Speaker 10 (30:02):
Combs in no and subculture.
Speaker 7 (30:05):
I got you.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Now you're a little furry freak.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Sophisticated ladies.
Speaker 4 (30:11):
You did not on purpose.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Well, I will be a caddy all my life.
Speaker 8 (30:15):
I'm going to.
Speaker 5 (30:16):
Car wash school in the farm and perfect gentlemen, have
you ever seen a crisp fifty dollars?
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Bill? I tell you what if I pulled the arrow out,
will you please suck out the poison for me?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Catty Shack two?
Speaker 3 (30:32):
Is there any money in it for me?
Speaker 2 (30:37):
Mine is Caddyshack to got a whopping four percent on
rotten tomatoes.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
Four percent.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Listen to this. Rodney Dangerfield was supposed to come back
as Al Shirvekh. He was funny in Caddy Shack Part one,
and they were going to bring back Chevy Chase. Bill
Murray had no interest, so they brought Harold Ramis in.
This was going to be a mean, high dollar tent
pole comedy for eighty eight. But Rodney Dangerfield got sideways
with the studio, so he drops out. Harold Ramis said, well,
(31:07):
if Rodney Dangerfield is not in it, I'm dropping out.
So he drops out right. They wouldn't let him take
his name off the thing. Chevy Chase wanted a million
bucks just to be in it for five minutes, and
he was a turn to the director of the whole
time sucker and Harold Raimis went to the studios like, listen,
let's just let this thing die. John Peters Is like, no, no, no, no,
(31:28):
We'll get Jackie Mason in it. They'll be great. Jackie
Mason is terrible.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Yeah. The guy that got into direct is a guy
named Alan Parkish. Yes, literally, his big movie before this
was nineteen eighty three's Get Crazy.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
You know what he was famous for up to this
point Moonlighting.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
Oh is that what he was doing? Yeah? Wow, yeah,
I mean he would he directed some TV. He did
La Law and Saint Elsewhere. But yeah, no, the this
was their pick for the replacement for Harold Ramos.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Yeah, guys, I watched this movie the other day. I
watched it. It was so bad. I literally told you,
I counted down to the exact second that this movie
lost me one minute in thirty seconds, one minute and
thirty seconds. Because the movie starts off at one minute
in thirty seconds. You have this ridiculous, terrible gopher puppet
(32:24):
that looks way worse and has no character than the
one that appeared in the first movie that was so
freakin funny.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
I looked at him like, this sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
It's just it's just that's right, it sucks.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Dan Aykroyd, they brought him in to do the Bill
Murray Park. Yeah, he has this ridiculous high voice.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
It's terrible. It's so so bad.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Michael Willingham of The La Times said this film is
so bad it makes Caddyshack one look like the Godfather
part too. So bad. Yeah, yep, all right, onto your
number one, sir.
Speaker 1 (33:02):
All right, my number one may not be the worst
in the series, especially considering that you've already brought up
one of the things in the series that led to
the making of this movie. But I never saw a Supergirl.
Didn't watch it, like yeah, yeah. I think like it
might have been a thing where it was on TV
(33:22):
and I was like, Oh, I should watch this, and
I put it on and I was just like no, no.
So I had the same reaction with that one that
I had with Indiana Jones and The Crystal Skull, where
I watched it for maybe five to ten minutes and
I was just like, there's no way that this can
become good like it is unrecoverable. On the other hand,
what happened with Superman four? My number one is I
(33:46):
watched it all and I just walked out a broken
human being.
Speaker 10 (33:53):
The greatest hope against the threat of nuclear war is Superman.
Speaker 9 (34:00):
I'm going to do what our governments they've been unwilling
or unable to do effective immediately. I'm going to rid
our planet of all nuclear weapons.
Speaker 10 (34:15):
The greatest threat to Superman is Lex Luthor.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Smarter than I thought, we can make the world safe
for war profits.
Speaker 10 (34:22):
He's created the ultimate weapon to annihilate the Man of Steel.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
Risk worldwide nuclear war for your own personal financial game.
Speaker 10 (34:32):
Nobody wants war.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
I just want to keep the threat alive.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Dude, to steal where are you gonna get it?
Speaker 1 (34:44):
And you know you're a workaholic. Let's just stop smell
the roses.
Speaker 10 (34:50):
Hum Superman for Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Jackie Cooper, John
Cryer with Mary Way and Margot Kidder as Lois Lane.
Superman for his most important adventure, the Quest for Peace.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
I mean I used to dress up like Superman. Superman
was my go to guy, and they ruined it. They
just ruined it. And so because it was taken from
such high point from my perspective down to such a
low point with this movie. That's why I put it in.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
It's so Superman has all these ridiculous powers. The effects
are terrible. They keep reusing the same shot. You have
this kid named Jeremy and his social studies class who
tells everyone, no, no, should get Superman take care of
the nuclear bombs. He gets a giant net from home
depot and takes all the nuclear bombs to the sun and.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
What and that creates like a fetus from the sun. Yeah,
a growing fetus from the sun that suddenly has clothes,
Like we're gonna make this all scientific until it can't
be naked. And he's literally goo that they put in
a box on one of the missiles, like what what
are you what? And it gets worse from there, like
(36:22):
it's like the worst creation point you can imagine. And
then we're gonna go all right, here is the guy
we're pitting against Superman because he's so powerful unless you
have an umbrella.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Exactly exactly, and they actually do a good job, like
Superman thinks this through. Okay, this guy is completely solar
powered as long as the sun doesn't touch him, I'm safe.
So he takes him to the dark side of the
moon literally never gets sunlight.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
Yeah, except in the movie it does. Like what krack
a text?
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Well, yeah, please ely dude, it's terrible.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Yeah. Okay. So that does it for our top five
or bottom five, if you will, Top five worst sequels
of the nineteen eighties. Now, I had some movies that
I was excited to talk about today that Jason totally went, no,
we can't do that because that's the nineties. I'm like,
oh crap, we've changed the rules. So the reason for
(37:25):
that is we will be coming back to you soon
with a top five worst sequels of the nineties.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
We want to hear what you guys think are these
If you are out there and you have an opinion
that says, no, no, no, no, you got this wrong. That
movie is actually really good. We really want to hear
from you. I want to hear from somebody who says,
Caddy Shack two is awesome, or Smoking the Band it
is Part three is freaking funny. I don't think you're
(37:52):
I don't think they're out there.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
We'll see Jackie Mason.
Speaker 2 (37:55):
When Jackie Mason his golf swad. I don't even want
to get into his golf week. Hit us up on Facebook,
hit us up on Twitter at Shirley Podcasts on both spots.
Thanks guys, We will see you back here next week,
I guess
Hello everybody, and welcome back to the Surely You Can't
Be Serious Podcast. We are here with another top five episode,
and this is a little unusual because it's really a
bottom five episode. Right.
Speaker 2 (00:28):
We don't typically like to be haters, but we don't,
but sometimes there are movies that deserve it. That's exactly right.
Speaker 1 (00:34):
Yeah, yeah, so you will not hear us hate on
movies very often. When we pick movies to cover, we
pick movies we like.
Speaker 2 (00:41):
Generally we pick winners.
Speaker 1 (00:42):
Yeah. Exceptions to that rule so far have been Jaws
The Revenge versus Superman four, two movies that both came
out the same year that were absolutely dismal for an
otherwise impressive franchise. Then we're gonna have another couple of
movies in the future. We're going to be teaming up
with some friends, gonna cover Last Action Hero, which is
(01:05):
a movie you walked out of I did, and then
that versus Alien three, yes, which I don't think I
walked out of that one, but I did walk out
of whatever the fourth one was where she had an
alien baby. At the alien baby scene, I was like,
I'm done.
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Yeah, yeah, we'll talk about that here in the next
couple of weeks with the guys from the Film By podcast. Yeah,
and actually we talked with them about Superman four versus
Chara Revenge. We call it What the Heck Happened Series.
Speaker 1 (01:34):
Yes, so this is our top five of what the
heck Happened from the eighties sequels.
Speaker 2 (01:40):
Yes.
Speaker 1 (01:40):
Now important to note we recently did an episode with
another podcast called pop Culture Yearbook. Yeah, that's right, and
we covered the best sequels of the eighties. And the
rules on that game were that the sequels had to
have come out sometime between nineteen eighty and nineteen ninety nine, right,
(02:03):
and it was more like a draft type of thing.
So we had three guys from the podcasts and us too.
So those three guys were Brad, Pete and Giff and
we picked the best sequels of the eighties. But today
we are going to be picking the worst sequels of
the eighties. Yes, enjoy this episode and then go check
(02:24):
out that episode we did with them again. That podcast is.
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Called pop Culture Yearbook.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
There you go. So the only rule that we are keeping, yes,
is that the movie has to come out sometime during
the eighties yesteen eighty to nineteen eighty nine. And again
it's going to be like our normal top five. Jason
has five, I have five. They might overlap, they might
be a sequel from another franchise. I don't know. We
will see.
Speaker 2 (02:48):
We don't know what each other's lists are.
Speaker 1 (02:50):
Yeah, but like our other top five episodes, what we're
going to do is we're going to drop little bread
calms and see if we can get the other guy
to guess what movie it is that we're talking about. Right,
are you ready to jump in?
Speaker 2 (03:00):
I'm ready to jump in. Let's do five, four, three, two,
honorable mentioned autible mention number one. Yes, just like our
top five lists before, exactly.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Okay, all right, I'm gonna let you go first. It's time.
Speaker 2 (03:10):
All right, d my number five Top five. I don't
know how to say this the right way. So this
is the fifth worst sequel of the eighties.
Speaker 1 (03:24):
Five.
Speaker 2 (03:25):
Now, some people are gonna fall out of their chair
when I say this.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Okay, okay, this was released.
Speaker 2 (03:30):
December eleventh, nineteen eighty five. Okay, this is a sequel.
So here's the tricky part. Part of me is like,
that's the worst sequel I've ever seen. The other part
of me is like, I loved the first movie and
this was the biggest disappointment I've ever had. Okay, So
December eleventh, nineteen eighty five, the budget on this one
twenty five million. It made ninety six million dollars. So
(03:52):
this is a hit movie.
Speaker 1 (03:53):
Wow, okay, yeah.
Speaker 2 (03:55):
Now, then the star of this movie tried to back
out at the last minute.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Okay, the other star.
Speaker 2 (04:03):
Like, there's two main people in this movie. The other
star was the producer, and he went to the studio
and the studio threatened to sue her for like twenty
five million dollars if she drops out. And so the
main male lead had to be the go between between
his female co star and the studio to keep her
from being sued. It was a total disaster before I
(04:27):
got off the ground, any idea what I'm talking about?
Speaker 1 (04:30):
I give up?
Speaker 2 (04:30):
Okay, I'll give you this hint.
Speaker 1 (04:32):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
The best thing to come from this movie is the
number two hit song when the Going Gets Tough by
Billy Oshin.
Speaker 1 (04:40):
I don't know, I don't know, No, I don't know.
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Okay. This is the sequel to Romancing the Stone. This
movie is called Jewel of the Nile.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Oh wow, I.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Got no pot Jack Coltman Chom Wild were romance and
a new kind of stone, all the jew him up
the nile.
Speaker 1 (04:58):
I practically got it in my hands.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
The only thing stopping me this quick shot a ripe
and stole it with him.
Speaker 1 (05:08):
Okay, yeah, no, cass. So Kathleen Turner was like, this
is dumb.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
I'm Kathleen Turner said. When she started to read the script,
She's like, this sucks. I want out. And Michael Douglas
is the producer on the movie. Yeah, And so she's
getting ready to screw him over. And so he said, listen,
calm down, I'll go to the studio. We'll rewrite this.
It'll be good. So they literally sat down with three
(05:32):
different scripts. He and Kathleen Turner sat down on the
ground and they decided, okay, well keep this. No, that's out. No,
this is in and that's out. And it was just
a disaster. I tried to watch this last night. Yeah,
for as good, literally as good as Michael Douglas, A
List Starr and Danny DeVito super funny, and Kathleen Turner
beautiful at the moment they could do nothing with this
(05:56):
dog around their neck.
Speaker 1 (05:57):
Really, it was awful, I guess. I mean I saw
it in the eighties and I was a kid, so
I just I guess I enjoyed it in the eighties.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
Okay, so here's the deal. Spoiler. Okay, if you haven't
seen Jewel the Nile, it came out forty years ago.
The Jewel is a man, which my twelve year old
self stood up in the theater. I'm like, what the
what are you talking about? I want my money back?
This is bull crap. Okay, So that's my number five.
(06:25):
So you don't remember that.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
One, now, I mean I don't remember the movie. I
just remember thinking of a good movie. So okay, I
couldn't have been alone. Obviously, there were you know, is
ninety five million. It's not a bad showing. It's true's tough.
Speaker 2 (06:40):
By the way, Michael Douglas, Danny DeVito, and Kathleen Turner
do go on to star in One of the Roses
in nineteen eighty nine.
Speaker 1 (06:49):
I do remember that. I remember watching that one in
the theater and not being impressed. Terrible, not being impressed
at all. Yeah, okay, okay, so here we go my
number five. The star of this particular movie is now
pretty routinely an actor who is in pretty close to
Christian movies. Like a lot of the you know, Christian
(07:11):
pushed movies, but at the time that he made this movie,
he was pretty well out of his mind on coke,
as was several of the other actors in the movie. Okay,
the actor who had played the lead in the first
two of these movies said, Mesistopheles himself could not have
(07:32):
pulled me in to make this movie. He almost didn't
make part two. But they made Part three, and it
was so bad that when they made Part four, which
was also horrible, they pretended like three didn't even exist.
It was. It was the characters became entirely different people
(07:54):
with different backgrounds. It was like number three never happened.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I know what this is. I know what it is.
It's Jaws three, three D.
Speaker 1 (08:02):
You got it.
Speaker 4 (08:04):
With the first you were too terrified to go back
in the water. Just when you were starting to think
it was safe, along came the second. Now nature's most
terrifying creature has returned in an all new adventure, Jaws three.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
This movie was the first movie I ever saw that
I walked out of the movie, and it was not
my doing. I didn't. I mean, I was a little kid.
I had no idea, but my Dad was like, okay,
come on, we're leaving, and I'm like, you could do that.
I thought you had to watch to the end. I
thought that was the rule.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
Okay, So here's the deal. I talked to Jeff Johnson
with the Philby podcast about this the other day. Yes,
we've covered Jaws one, they've covered Jaws two. We together
have covered Josh four. We have got to get together
and talk about Joss three at some point.
Speaker 1 (09:06):
Absolutely.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Okay, good, okay, So we're onto my number four.
Speaker 5 (09:14):
Four?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
All right. This movie was released November twenty first, nineteen
eighty four. Sorry, def Dave black Eye for nineteen eighty
four on this one, Sonya, Yes, no, it's not right.
That was a good guess though, that was very close.
Speaker 1 (09:33):
Fifth category? Am I am I wrong? Category?
Speaker 2 (09:37):
That's true? It is not that Okay. This had a
whopping eight percent on Rotten Tomatoes. This one two razzies
and literally is responsible for the selling of this franchise
to the Canon group.
Speaker 1 (09:53):
Is this Superman three?
Speaker 2 (09:55):
This is not Superman three?
Speaker 1 (09:57):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (09:57):
This is.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
A girl.
Speaker 6 (10:03):
Alexander Sulkind presents the action packed adventures of a dazzling
new superhero, starring Peter o'too I.
Speaker 5 (10:10):
Must be sent to the phantom zone.
Speaker 2 (10:13):
They Dunaway mea Farah Venus ring ridden of a caro Mark.
Speaker 6 (10:21):
McClure, that's Clark Kent's cousin hert Buckner, and introducing Helen
Slater as super Girl. Adventure runs in the family.
Speaker 1 (10:35):
Oh right, right of course, yes, so there you go.
Oh yeah, and questionable whether Supergirl is worse or Superman
four quests for peace.
Speaker 2 (10:46):
There is no question. This is worse.
Speaker 1 (10:50):
Is worse for sure?
Speaker 2 (10:51):
Okay, now listen to this. I got some tidbits for
you on this. They Dunaway was cast as the stupid
Witch in this movie. They wanted Dolly Parton. Demi Moore
was almost cast as Lucy Lane in this movie. Lucy
Lane is Lois's sister.
Speaker 1 (11:05):
Oh right right.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Helen Slater is Supergirl. She's twenty years old. None of
this is her fault. She has no real superpower. She
can fly, but like she changes clothes magically and her
hair changes colors. This makes no sense. A total dog yeah,
absolute disaster and literally caused the Superman franchise to fall
(11:26):
in the Cannon Group's hands. Wow, in which they promptly
turned around and made Superman four, which we'll talk about.
Speaker 1 (11:32):
Here in a minute.
Speaker 2 (11:33):
Okay, all right, all right back to you, sir.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Okay, this one that I'm about to talk to talk
about it was the beginning of the end for the franchise,
but somehow it did not stop them. Okay, so still
had as the lead, the lead from Part one and
Part two and part three, but this was part four,
and it was the beginning of the dismal results that
(12:00):
were Part four, Part five and Part six. And you're
gonna hurt.
Speaker 2 (12:06):
My feelings if this is what I think it is.
Speaker 1 (12:08):
Yeah, this is the one where everybody went, Wait a minute,
Steve Gutenberg is terrible? How did he? How's he been
a star? How do we get him in cocoons? Oh?
Speaker 2 (12:19):
My gosh, the goots? Yeah, this is the fourth Police
Academy movie.
Speaker 3 (12:26):
Graduates in Police Academy. I wonder to welcome all.
Speaker 2 (12:32):
Of you citizens.
Speaker 7 (12:36):
The Police Academy has offered to train you citizen here.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
You don't think I'm facked.
Speaker 3 (12:40):
You know, if any won't do you.
Speaker 1 (12:42):
To better protect yourself?
Speaker 3 (12:43):
Do we get to pack heat a car, thecho card,
money chairs, sitting mat Jo, my dollar, sweet Chi that's it?
Speaker 6 (13:01):
And Tackleberry good idea?
Speaker 1 (13:04):
Citizens on Patrol, Citizens Cop, Citizens on Patrol, unfunny from
beginning to end.
Speaker 4 (13:12):
It.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
I saw this in the theaters me.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
Too, and at ten years old, I thought it was hysterical.
Go back and watching it, I was just like, what
could I possibly have found? Funny?
Speaker 8 (13:21):
Man?
Speaker 2 (13:22):
Okay, so I haven't seen this since eighty seven, but
I walked out of the theater going, that was freaking funny.
All right, Back to me for my number three three,
I'll eat my shoes. If you've seen this movie.
Speaker 1 (13:38):
Okay.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
This movie is a sequel that came out in nineteen
eighty five to a movie that we've covered on the
Shirley Can't Be Serious Podcast eighty five came out in
eighty five. Okay, now listen to this. The subtitle for
this movie is called Your Sister Is a Werewolf.
Speaker 1 (13:56):
Nope, okay.
Speaker 2 (13:57):
This stars Reb Brown, who played Captain America in the
nineteen seventy nine version.
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (14:05):
Okay, Yeah, you've got jud Omen who played Mickey in
Peewee's Big Adventure, the guy who hitches a ride and
he's running from the cops.
Speaker 1 (14:13):
Okay, you're gonna have to keep going, my friend, I've
got nothing.
Speaker 2 (14:17):
This is the big dropper. For you ready for this?
Speaker 1 (14:19):
Uh huh.
Speaker 2 (14:19):
It also stars Marcia Hunt, who was married to Mick Jagger.
She's a black woman. She was the source for the
song brown Sugar.
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Wow. Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (14:43):
It also stars Sybil Danning as Queen Sturba, who is
the Queen Werewolf. This is the Howling to Part two
Potty Time.
Speaker 7 (15:03):
It's no rocking Shock new Way, oh hard, no howling too.
Speaker 3 (15:16):
Wow.
Speaker 1 (15:17):
I can say that I've seen parts of this, very
specific parts.
Speaker 2 (15:22):
Okay, so we have to talk about that part, right,
Sybil Danning. You don't hire for a great acting ability.
You hire her because she has amazing boobs, right, And
the director of this movie is like, okay, let's go top,
let's take it off. And she's like, no, I'm not
doing I'm tired of doing boom shots. Uh huh. And
he's like, no, you have to. It's part of your contract.
You gotta do it. So she said, all right, listen,
(15:44):
I'm gonna do this one time. So she rips off
her shirt one time in the movie, and then they
copy and paste it seventeen times in the closing credits.
Speaker 1 (15:54):
Yep, rip, rip rip.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
You have lines like I told you we'd get these fuzzballs.
Speaker 1 (16:04):
Ah, that is great.
Speaker 2 (16:06):
Okay, over to you, my good man.
Speaker 1 (16:08):
Okay, so we're to my number three.
Speaker 2 (16:10):
You're number three, all right.
Speaker 1 (16:12):
This movie came out in nineteen eighty three, forty years ago. Okay.
The star of this movie said that his favorite director
to work with was the director of this movie because
he knew how to make me look the best on screen. Okay.
The director also had a movie came out in eighty
(16:35):
three that was absolutely fantastic, that was a number three
in the series. Okay, I don't know what it is yet.
The director had her brother who had a song on
the album how about you got it now?
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Uh, we queue up Frank Stallone Far from over. This
is Staying Alive.
Speaker 8 (17:00):
Pictures presents John Travolta. You know, Robert Stigwood production, a
Sylvester Stallone film, Staying a Lot.
Speaker 1 (17:17):
Yeah, so Sylvester Stallone John Travolta's favorite director to work
with because Sylvester Stallone knew how to make John Travolta
look good on the screen.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Oh, that's interesting.
Speaker 1 (17:25):
What is also interesting is that this got a wopping
four point seven on IMDb, so he couldn't have either.
He didn't look that good or the looking good didn't
make enough difference for such a terrible, terrible script.
Speaker 2 (17:37):
I have never seen this movie. Oh yeah, but here's
the deal. You and I both hated Saturday Night Fever.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Well, yeah, so, I mean the thing is that as
bad as Saturday Night Fever was, this is worse. This
is worse. Yeah. I actually when we first started watching
Saturday Night Fever, I was like, where's the part where
he says I'm going to go strut? It turns out
that was my memory from watching Staying Alive and that
didn't happen until that next movie.
Speaker 2 (18:04):
Okay, quick note on Staying Alive number one. I know
our good buddy John Reid likes this movie.
Speaker 1 (18:09):
John Reid, who also likes Alien three.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Exactly right. I do know that Cynthia Rhodes aka Rosanna
and Penny from Dirty Dancing was in this movie, and
I know that she met her husband Richard Marx on
the set of Staying Alive.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
All right, that is very cool, now, but that's Patrick
Swayze is in the movie Dancing in White Suspenders again
with Cyncia and Cynthia Rhodes.
Speaker 2 (18:36):
Crazy again with Cynthia Rhods.
Speaker 1 (18:39):
Yeah, yes, exactly you know from the Toto video exactly
in your Dreams. And also Richie Sampora is in the movie.
He is a member of Frank Stallone's band. Whenever Tony
Manero visits Jackie at the rehearsals at the club.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Oh, I'm watching this movie. Now, that's it.
Speaker 1 (18:59):
I've got to watch this movie. You dig it the most, baby,
Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2 (19:06):
Another movie where the best thing that came out of
this was the song Okay, I wean know to my
number two.
Speaker 1 (19:13):
You're number two.
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Two My number two was released August twelfth, nineteen eighty three.
This is another movie that made me stand up in
the theater and point and say, what the f is
going on? This is absolute abomination.
Speaker 1 (19:32):
Okay, okay.
Speaker 2 (19:33):
Problem with this is this was like the eighth movie
in the series of a very successful series that you
and I both talked about how much we like. Okay,
the star of the series died, and this is the
second attempt to reboot the series without him but maintaining
the character.
Speaker 1 (19:56):
I got nothing, man, this is good. Keep going, okay, Okay.
Speaker 2 (20:00):
The star of this particular movie is another actor that
we've talked about. He played James Bond in the eighties.
Speaker 1 (20:09):
Oh, is this the Pink Panther. This is the return
of the Pink pant Curse of the Pink Panther, of
the Pink Panther. That's right.
Speaker 5 (20:23):
Introducing Ted Was as a detective sergeant Clifton Slay and
Blake Edwards Curse of the Pink Panther.
Speaker 1 (20:32):
This is my big chance, don't it?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
Where Inspector Clouseau quote unquote has plastic surgery and is
played by a clumsy, ridiculous French accent Roger Moore.
Speaker 1 (20:49):
That's right. Well, I can tell you that what I
remember of this movie involved grapes, yes, because that's what
I was concerned about whenever I was a kid, was
the naked ladies squishing the grapes with their toes.
Speaker 2 (21:00):
God was that in this one or was that in
the previous one?
Speaker 8 (21:03):
No?
Speaker 1 (21:03):
I think that was I think that.
Speaker 2 (21:04):
Wow, I do remember that scene.
Speaker 7 (21:06):
Though.
Speaker 2 (21:08):
I do know that Blake Edwards like they changed the
release date of this movie and it violated his contract,
and so he sued the studio and then they sued
him and it was this big legal battle. Either way,
it was this huge decise. How do you make two
Pink Panther movies? Keeping in spectracluzoh and not and Peter
(21:29):
Sellers is dead and buried.
Speaker 1 (21:30):
Yeah, that's bad. It's a bad idea.
Speaker 2 (21:33):
It's insane, terrible, terrible. Okay, that's a good choice to
your number two, sir. All right, My number two is
a number two, okay. Came out of nineteen eighty eight.
This might be my number one.
Speaker 1 (21:44):
I'm confident that it is.
Speaker 2 (21:46):
Okay, we can we can talk together.
Speaker 1 (21:48):
Can dispense with the with the guessing. At this point,
I am confident that this is your number one. Okay,
we can move on and go straight into your number
one because we're at your number one, right, this is.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Got Oh yeah, we gotta do honorable mentions, all.
Speaker 1 (22:03):
Right, so before we get to this one, which is
my number two, go.
Speaker 2 (22:06):
Ahead, you're number one.
Speaker 1 (22:07):
Yes, We've got honorable mentions. So I'm gonna let you
go on the honorable mentions. Okay.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
My first honorable mention D came out the summer of
nineteen eighty seven. We did a whole podcast on this movie.
This movie nearly and I mean nearly killed this franchise
that was an American icon because this movie was so bad.
Released in nineteen eighty seven, they ran out of money,
and so the poor actor who we all adore in
(22:35):
this role had to look really hard at the Great
Wall of China and rebuild it.
Speaker 1 (22:42):
So this is interesting because my number two is your
number one, and my number one is your honorable mentions. Okay,
this is this is the question for more money. This
is Superman.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Yes, absolutely it is. The Canon group purchased this because
the Salkinds got in so much trouble with Supergirl.
Speaker 3 (23:02):
Yep.
Speaker 2 (23:02):
Then they turn around and they have been hamorrhaging like
ninety million dollars a year, so they have to cut corners.
The budget for this Superman movie was seventeen million dollars.
How do you make a big budget Superman movie for
seventeen million bucks?
Speaker 1 (23:18):
You don't. You make a terrible, terrible thing.
Speaker 2 (23:20):
Yes, they had a pretty good start. They had Gene Hackman,
they had John Cryer, they had Margo Kidder. And then
they turn around and do things like Superman is flying
and intentionally drops Margo Kidder. It gives her our heart attack?
Remember that?
Speaker 1 (23:33):
Yes, Uh, it's so bad. Guys, go back and check
out our Superman four versus Jaws The Revenge.
Speaker 2 (23:43):
Yes, yes, my second honorable mention is a part three
to a movie that we have discussed in season one.
This movie was literally the second biggest movie of nineteen
seventy seven.
Speaker 1 (23:54):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
So by the time this rolls out in the year
nineteen eighty three again and the main character is not
in this movie, it's baffling to me that somebody says,
keep going, let's do this. So here's what they do.
They doubled down. Excuse me, they triple down, and they
make the Smoky the bandit also literally with no bandit's
(24:22):
this is smoking the Bandit. Part three. Jerry Reid was
the bandit.
Speaker 1 (24:27):
Yeah, he played. He steps into the bandit position and
it is not a good it's not a good fit.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
No.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
In fact, he had to come in at the last
minute because originally Jackie Gleason was playing the bandit and
then but he was also playing the smoky and he's
also playing like his cousin, Canadian cousin Jackie Gleason had
multiple parts and the audience got confused, so they brought
in Jerry Reid to play the bandit the last second.
It was a complete disaster and they should have just
(24:54):
dropped it. Okay, onto your honorable mentions.
Speaker 1 (24:57):
Sir, Okay, So this is a sea cool to a
movie that we have talked about before. We've talked about
the original movie before, not in a full episode context,
but I know that I've brought it up before because
there's a scene in the middle of that movie where
they're in a graveyard and one of the members of
(25:18):
the punk band, one of the female members played by
incredible actress Lena Quigley, who seems to lose her clothes
in quite a horror movies, gun Blisser manages to lose
her clothes in this movie as well. As she's stripping
to song, somebody's playing out of a boombox in the cemetery.
And I think I brought this up because I was
(25:40):
literally at the Vinyl record store and this song starts
playing over the pa and I'm like, no, this song.
Where do I know this song from? And the guy's like,
you know it from Return of the Living Dead And
I was like, oh, yeah, I've only seen that one part.
He's like, yep, that's the same part that everybody else
has seen. But that Return of the Living Dead was
(26:02):
not a bad movie. I mean, it's a seven point three.
It's a good movie. The Return of the Living Dead
Part two five point seven came out in nineteen eighty eight,
and it is a dismal, dismal follow up. Oh man,
could have been a pretty good series of movies.
Speaker 2 (26:20):
Wow, Okay, that's good. I've never seen that one. Nineteen
eighty eight. Huh yep, thirty five years ago.
Speaker 1 (26:25):
Yeah, don't bother with part two. Just go back to
part one which came out, and go back to part one,
which came out in eighty five. The perfect time to have,
you know, punk heads stripping in a cemetery. Okay, okay,
this one is for you, sir.
Speaker 2 (26:43):
Okay, this is your second honorable mention.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
This is my second honorable mention, not because the first
one was great, although it did. It did launch the
career of a director that we've talked about before. Okay,
and oddly enough, in a movie where he was parodying
a movie that of a big director at the time
who then said, Hey, I want you to come direct
a movie that I'm producing. But the part two of
(27:07):
the series nearly ended the career of one of your
favorite directors before it ever got started.
Speaker 2 (27:15):
I know what this is. Yes, this is Piranhatu, the Spawning.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
You got it.
Speaker 2 (27:21):
Hey, I watched this movie and I don't think it's
all that bad.
Speaker 1 (27:25):
Well, James Cameron thought it was terrible. James Cameron did think,
and James Cameron got like fired halfway through or quit
halfway through, depending on which version you listened to. Like,
he was there with no money, not for the movie,
not for himself. He was stealing food off of the
carts that people left out at the hotel room. That's
how that's how down to the dirt he was. And yeah,
(27:50):
I he luckily managed to escape what could have been
a dismal career ending movie by just kind of disclaiming
and saying this wasn't really me.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
Right, he said when he got the phone call that
he was fired, he was painting rubber fish in his
hotel room, like working around the clock to try and
make this turn into something good.
Speaker 1 (28:12):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Jeff Johnson and I have talked about this. We both
like this movie. Wow, it's actually okay.
Speaker 1 (28:17):
No, it's not. This movie got a three point eight.
Oh yeah, okay, so we are on to our number ones.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
One of the good things about Prontutude the Spawning though,
that's when Lance Hendrickson meets up with James Cameron and
he goes on to play Bishop and Aliens.
Speaker 1 (28:35):
Yeah, and is the He is the guy who James
Cameron had set up to play the terminator and comes
in dressed as the terminator for the producers, bust through
the door, gun in hand, and they're like, what the heck? Yeah,
almost ruined that one too, that's true. Yeah, that's good
(28:55):
all right. So now here we are to number back
to number ones. And I know what yours is?
Speaker 2 (29:00):
No Jerseys.
Speaker 1 (29:02):
One, right, So yours is Caddyshack too.
Speaker 5 (29:12):
Ladies and a gentlemen, let's get ready to remember what
goes around comes around. Welcome back to Caddyshack.
Speaker 9 (29:25):
Hey, ty, you're looking well, Hey, nice to see if
any ted whatever?
Speaker 5 (29:29):
Bushwood Country Club, So you want to join old Bushwood,
where snowbery is a way of life.
Speaker 1 (29:35):
We just don't feed your Bushwood material. I want to
bite Bushwood Country Club.
Speaker 5 (29:39):
Let me ask you this, honest. But now it's members
are gonna get what they deserve.
Speaker 4 (29:45):
What do you think is it great?
Speaker 10 (29:47):
That's grat h out.
Speaker 5 (29:49):
God, the shack is back.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Our members will never stand for this.
Speaker 10 (29:56):
It's a story of high culture.
Speaker 3 (29:58):
Who I was looking? Bodygrip?
Speaker 7 (30:01):
No, No, that loose stuff.
Speaker 1 (30:02):
You put your.
Speaker 10 (30:02):
Combs in no and subculture.
Speaker 7 (30:05):
I got you.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Now you're a little furry freak.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Sophisticated ladies.
Speaker 4 (30:11):
You did not on purpose.
Speaker 1 (30:13):
Well, I will be a caddy all my life.
Speaker 8 (30:15):
I'm going to.
Speaker 5 (30:16):
Car wash school in the farm and perfect gentlemen, have
you ever seen a crisp fifty dollars?
Speaker 3 (30:21):
Bill? I tell you what if I pulled the arrow out,
will you please suck out the poison for me?
Speaker 1 (30:31):
Catty Shack two?
Speaker 3 (30:32):
Is there any money in it for me?
Speaker 2 (30:37):
Mine is Caddyshack to got a whopping four percent on
rotten tomatoes.
Speaker 1 (30:43):
Four percent.
Speaker 2 (30:44):
Listen to this. Rodney Dangerfield was supposed to come back
as Al Shirvekh. He was funny in Caddy Shack Part one,
and they were going to bring back Chevy Chase. Bill
Murray had no interest, so they brought Harold Ramis in.
This was going to be a mean, high dollar tent
pole comedy for eighty eight. But Rodney Dangerfield got sideways
with the studio, so he drops out. Harold Ramis said, well,
(31:07):
if Rodney Dangerfield is not in it, I'm dropping out.
So he drops out right. They wouldn't let him take
his name off the thing. Chevy Chase wanted a million
bucks just to be in it for five minutes, and
he was a turn to the director of the whole
time sucker and Harold Raimis went to the studios like, listen,
let's just let this thing die. John Peters Is like, no, no, no, no,
(31:28):
We'll get Jackie Mason in it. They'll be great. Jackie
Mason is terrible.
Speaker 1 (31:34):
Yeah. The guy that got into direct is a guy
named Alan Parkish. Yes, literally, his big movie before this
was nineteen eighty three's Get Crazy.
Speaker 2 (31:47):
You know what he was famous for up to this
point Moonlighting.
Speaker 1 (31:50):
Oh is that what he was doing? Yeah? Wow, yeah,
I mean he would he directed some TV. He did
La Law and Saint Elsewhere. But yeah, no, the this
was their pick for the replacement for Harold Ramos.
Speaker 2 (32:02):
Yeah, guys, I watched this movie the other day. I
watched it. It was so bad. I literally told you,
I counted down to the exact second that this movie
lost me one minute in thirty seconds, one minute and
thirty seconds. Because the movie starts off at one minute
in thirty seconds. You have this ridiculous, terrible gopher puppet
(32:24):
that looks way worse and has no character than the
one that appeared in the first movie that was so
freakin funny.
Speaker 1 (32:31):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (32:32):
I looked at him like, this sucks.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
It's just it's just that's right, it sucks.
Speaker 2 (32:39):
Dan Aykroyd, they brought him in to do the Bill
Murray Park. Yeah, he has this ridiculous high voice.
Speaker 1 (32:45):
It's terrible. It's so so bad.
Speaker 2 (32:48):
Michael Willingham of The La Times said this film is
so bad it makes Caddyshack one look like the Godfather
part too. So bad. Yeah, yep, all right, onto your
number one, sir.
Speaker 1 (33:02):
All right, my number one may not be the worst
in the series, especially considering that you've already brought up
one of the things in the series that led to
the making of this movie. But I never saw a Supergirl.
Didn't watch it, like yeah, yeah. I think like it
might have been a thing where it was on TV
(33:22):
and I was like, Oh, I should watch this, and
I put it on and I was just like no, no.
So I had the same reaction with that one that
I had with Indiana Jones and The Crystal Skull, where
I watched it for maybe five to ten minutes and
I was just like, there's no way that this can
become good like it is unrecoverable. On the other hand,
what happened with Superman four? My number one is I
(33:46):
watched it all and I just walked out a broken
human being.
Speaker 10 (33:53):
The greatest hope against the threat of nuclear war is Superman.
Speaker 9 (34:00):
I'm going to do what our governments they've been unwilling
or unable to do effective immediately. I'm going to rid
our planet of all nuclear weapons.
Speaker 10 (34:15):
The greatest threat to Superman is Lex Luthor.
Speaker 2 (34:18):
Smarter than I thought, we can make the world safe
for war profits.
Speaker 10 (34:22):
He's created the ultimate weapon to annihilate the Man of Steel.
Speaker 3 (34:28):
Risk worldwide nuclear war for your own personal financial game.
Speaker 10 (34:32):
Nobody wants war.
Speaker 1 (34:34):
I just want to keep the threat alive.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
Dude, to steal where are you gonna get it?
Speaker 1 (34:44):
And you know you're a workaholic. Let's just stop smell
the roses.
Speaker 10 (34:50):
Hum Superman for Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Jackie Cooper, John
Cryer with Mary Way and Margot Kidder as Lois Lane.
Superman for his most important adventure, the Quest for Peace.
Speaker 1 (35:16):
I mean I used to dress up like Superman. Superman
was my go to guy, and they ruined it. They
just ruined it. And so because it was taken from
such high point from my perspective down to such a
low point with this movie. That's why I put it in.
Speaker 2 (35:37):
It's so Superman has all these ridiculous powers. The effects
are terrible. They keep reusing the same shot. You have
this kid named Jeremy and his social studies class who
tells everyone, no, no, should get Superman take care of
the nuclear bombs. He gets a giant net from home
depot and takes all the nuclear bombs to the sun and.
Speaker 1 (36:00):
What and that creates like a fetus from the sun. Yeah,
a growing fetus from the sun that suddenly has clothes,
Like we're gonna make this all scientific until it can't
be naked. And he's literally goo that they put in
a box on one of the missiles, like what what
are you what? And it gets worse from there, like
(36:22):
it's like the worst creation point you can imagine. And
then we're gonna go all right, here is the guy
we're pitting against Superman because he's so powerful unless you
have an umbrella.
Speaker 2 (36:35):
Exactly exactly, and they actually do a good job, like
Superman thinks this through. Okay, this guy is completely solar
powered as long as the sun doesn't touch him, I'm safe.
So he takes him to the dark side of the
moon literally never gets sunlight.
Speaker 1 (36:51):
Yeah, except in the movie it does. Like what krack
a text?
Speaker 2 (37:00):
Well, yeah, please ely dude, it's terrible.
Speaker 1 (37:04):
Yeah. Okay. So that does it for our top five
or bottom five, if you will, Top five worst sequels
of the nineteen eighties. Now, I had some movies that
I was excited to talk about today that Jason totally went, no,
we can't do that because that's the nineties. I'm like,
oh crap, we've changed the rules. So the reason for
(37:25):
that is we will be coming back to you soon
with a top five worst sequels of the nineties.
Speaker 2 (37:31):
We want to hear what you guys think are these
If you are out there and you have an opinion
that says, no, no, no, no, you got this wrong. That
movie is actually really good. We really want to hear
from you. I want to hear from somebody who says,
Caddy Shack two is awesome, or Smoking the Band it
is Part three is freaking funny. I don't think you're
(37:52):
I don't think they're out there.
Speaker 1 (37:53):
We'll see Jackie Mason.
Speaker 2 (37:55):
When Jackie Mason his golf swad. I don't even want
to get into his golf week. Hit us up on Facebook,
hit us up on Twitter at Shirley Podcasts on both spots.
Thanks guys, We will see you back here next week,
I guess
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