Rewind to 7 to 13 August 2005.It’s the week the UN got scandalous, Shane Warne made history and a Playboy Mansion reality show somehow counted as TV. Plus: Jessica Simpson washes a car… aggressively. Let’s ride.
🛢️ UN scandal gets greasy. The third Volcker Report into the Oil-for-Food Program dropped and it was messier than a deep-fried mars bar. Top UN official Benon Sevan was accused of pocketing bribes, Saddam’s regime raked in billions and the whole thing made the UN look about as secure as your Hotmail password.
🚀 Space tourism’s wild pitch. Space Adventures announced plans to send rich people around the Moon for $100 million. Bold. But despite all the big talk and Soyuz flights, the dream of a billionaire doing a moonwalk in a space suit fizzled.
🏏 Warnie hits 600. Shane Warne became the first bowler to take 600 Test wickets, knocking over Marcus Trescothick in a wild Ashes draw at Old Trafford. Then he casually smashed 90 runs with the bat. Icon behaviour.
🎥 Daisy Dukes take over. The Dukes of Hazzard reboot hit #1 at the US box office, mostly thanks to Jessica Simpson’s car wash scene and a lot of Dodge Chargers being violently sacrificed for your viewing pleasure.
🐰 Playboy Mansion gets reality TV. The Girls Next Door premiered, serving bunny ears, low-rise everything and the illusion that Hef was just a quirky grandpa. The later memoirs? Not so fluffy.
📚 James Patterson’s 'Lifeguard' bombs. This week’s NYT bestseller featured less lifeguarding, more nonsense. Reviewers called it “clunky,” “gratuitous,” and “a reason to never trust your husband’s book recs again.”
🎶 Bow Wow & Omarion lose control. The US #1? Let Me Hold You. Bow Wow and Omarion gave us a house party drama that launched Future’s music video cameo career. Yes, really.
💥 Singer survives headshot. Marc Cohn was shot in the head during a carjacking attempt… and walked it off. Literally. He’s fine, but our jaws are still on the floor.
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