Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:15):
Hey, it's Jen the
Builder and Corey, and hello
everyone.
It is our birthday month and wehave been packed with a bunch
of birthday shenanigans man, ohman, have we been.
Speaker 2 (00:31):
And I don't even want
to say partying, because most
people think partying meansyou're out there dancing,
drinking and doing all kind oflascivious type activity, and
that's not what I mean bypartying.
But we've been on the go, we'vebeen celebrating one another.
Speaker 1 (00:46):
I'm on the 28th,
jen's on the 30th so, and our
anniversary is on the 12th, sowe've just been having good time
after good time, after goodtime yeah, and speaking of good
time, we're gonna have one todayand, corey, you're just so good
about making sure we fiteverything in that we're
supposed to be doing, so you'relike do you want to record
(01:10):
before everything begins?
I'm like sure and that'sactually really good practice,
especially for me, because if Ihave something to do towards the
end of the day it kind of Idon't want to say puts a damper,
but it's always in my mind.
Speaker 2 (01:24):
Right.
Speaker 1 (01:24):
Like, oh God, I just
love to do this.
So I just love getting thingsdone with.
So if you have a day plannedfor enjoyment, you can truly
enjoy the day.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Absolutely.
And, jen, I kind of thought ofthat as we're planning our day
of festivities, we're going tohave some people over and
they're going to come tocelebrate the fact that we had
to be like a surprise for me.
Well, it kind of is.
I mean, you don't know allthat's in, that's entailed.
It's going to happen anyway.
(01:55):
I got a couple of announcements.
If that's all right.
Speaker 1 (01:59):
Go for it.
Speaker 2 (01:59):
Nice.
So, if you haven't noticed, wehave been growing.
The podcast is growing.
The YouTube channel for havebeen growing.
The podcast is growing.
The YouTube channel for theFuzzy Furry Forest is growing.
Our social medias are growingnot by leaps and bounds, but
everything is slowly starting topick up pace, and that's
intentional, so we just want toshare this with you guys.
(02:20):
If you're looking for anopportunity to win a free
Ruffles plushie it's a one of akind.
You will not find them outthere anymore.
This is one of the last onesthat we're going to be giving
away, and the way you do that isto subscribe to the YouTube
channel and comment on any videothat you would like to, and
(02:42):
then you will be entered.
That you would like to, andthen you will be entered, and on
October 1st we will beannouncing the winner of that
free plushie.
Also, the Genco Sound Companyhas been partnering with many
different people, but one inparticular was Dr Jessica Miller
(03:04):
.
If you would like one of herbooks for free, we are just
asking that you get in contactwith us, and we're going to be
giving at least five books away,and we want to share that with
you guys as well.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Yeah, awesome, have
we posted her video on our
YouTube yet?
Speaker 2 (03:21):
Not yet.
Speaker 1 (03:22):
That's going to be
good.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
Yes, it will be.
Speaker 1 (03:25):
And that's all I'm
going to say.
It that's gonna be good, yes,it will be, and that's all I'm
gonna say.
It's gonna be good, all right.
So for today's episode to endaugust and say hello to
september, core, you sent methis amazing quote, more like a
belief that you stand firm onyes um, and I am in agreement.
So it says if your peacedepends on everything going
(03:46):
right, it's not peace, it'scontrol.
Speaker 2 (03:50):
Aye, aye, aye.
Speaker 1 (03:52):
Yeah.
So it's like have you all evertold yourselves I'll be at peace
once everything finally settlesdown?
Speaker 2 (03:59):
Mm-hmm.
Speaker 1 (04:00):
Right.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
So the truth is is
what Peace isn't found in
everything going perfectly.
Speaker 2 (04:07):
No, absolutely not,
and it's not found in and under
your control.
It's almost impossible to havepeace when someone's controlling
it.
You're probably invoking chaosin someone else's life and
stress, and stress if you'recontrolling it.
What I've realized is trying tocontrol situations.
(04:30):
I've tried to control kids,family, marriage, friends, and
what always happens is it getsworse and worse and worse.
And I've learned to lean intowhat real peace is and I'm sure
we're going to get to that.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
Yeah, so it sounds
like where we're going.
Is that peace isn't found againin everything going perfectly
or in as planned, but it's howwe hold ourselves when life
isn't perfect or when thingsdon't go according to plan,
right?
So, corey, how would you definepeace?
Speaker 2 (05:06):
Peace to me is a
sense of calm in any scenario,
in any situation.
It's that safe place that youcan go to emotionally,
spiritually, even financially,because we know that there is
some chaos that happensfinancially and you just have to
resolve that.
There is nothing I can do aboutthis right now and I need to
(05:29):
settle in my peace so that I canmove forward.
And so, yes, financially, evenromantically, as far as being in
a relationship.
You have to find that placewithin yourself first before you
can have that within therelationship between two people.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Right.
So I would describe it as likean inner steadiness, right, and
a lot of our peace comes fromour faith and that's what it's
rooted in.
So one of the stories that Ithink of, when things felt very
chaotic but there was still apeace there, and it's so hard to
(06:12):
explain in just words becauseit's such a feeling, such an
emotion that we went through.
So we've shared before ourstories of when we were younger
and cory um, this is a surpriseto you that I'm bringing it up,
but I really want to share thisstory, okay, and I think you
(06:35):
might have touched on it or wentdeeper than just touched on it
a couple episodes ago, but Iremember when we were going
through our own addictions yeahand this may sound so weird, but
I'll just share it.
for me, when I knew that therewere addictions I had to let go
(06:56):
of and I would think about itliterally while doing it, and in
the midst of all that chaos andbeing controlled literally by a
substance, there was a peacewhere I knew that this was not
going to be for the rest of mylife and that it was actually
going to end soon.
I just didn't know when, but Icould just feel that that
(07:19):
readiness for it, you know, andthere was a calm like this is
not my life, right, this is whatit is in this moment.
You know what I mean.
Oh yeah, and so those are twovery different feelings.
Different like being inhopelessness but yet feeling
(07:41):
hope and having the faith that Iwas going to be able to walk
from it.
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Right.
So there's two things for methat resonate with what you said
and it's going to sound likeI'm disagreeing, but I'm
actually agreeing with you.
So, yes, faith, but I'mactually agreeing with you.
So, yes, faith.
However, it's the trust that Iknow who you are at your core
that allows me to have peaceabout certain things, and that
(08:10):
exists with other people as well, because when you know someone,
now I get it.
Everyone is unpredictable.
At some point in time you mayask for apple pie instead of
chocolate cake, but there'snever going to be that moment
where it's so outlandish thatyou're like, oh my goodness, I
just did not see this coming.
(08:30):
You know, that's a little bit ofpeace that I have in you and
our relationship and ourchildren, now that they're
adults and they've shown uspatterns and they've proven who
they are as individuals.
Second thing is, I understandsomething about what you were
(08:53):
saying as far as the addictionand the way I paint that picture
is being in a raging sea with30 feet waves just toppling on
top of you and you're lost inthe emotion of chaos, and when
you have that moment of clarity,meaning you see far enough into
(09:16):
the storm that there's light,there's blue sky and if you
leave right then right now, youcan get out of this addiction
and you can probably turn thetide of what's going on for you.
And so that's my sense of peaceis when I see any kind of
(09:39):
silver lining or any kind ofblue sky and the chaos, I'm
always reaching for that,running for that, swimming for
that.
However you want to paint thatpicture, that's what I'm trying
to achieve at that moment.
Speaker 1 (09:51):
What a beautiful
analogy, truly.
What a beautiful analogy.
Truly, because that reminds meof being in that chaos, in the
storm, If we go opposite of whatpeace is.
That's control.
Right, and control is typicallyrooted in fear.
Right, Because, look, I've gotto control this.
(10:12):
Everything's not going asplanned.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
Right.
Speaker 1 (10:18):
And it really is an
illusion.
I feel that you can manageevery outcome.
I think there's a sense ofcontrol, as in how you react,
but to your point, that's havingpeace and faith in who you are.
And, again, your steadfastness,right, right, like going
(10:39):
through it.
Um, it reminds me cory and youcan help me because, um, I think
in this, this kind of stuff,you've done your research more.
I'm reminded of the story whenyeshua was in a storm and he
(10:59):
walked on water right, calm thesea for Peter.
Later I always thought that wasthe ocean.
Based on how that story wentwhen I was a younger child, I
thought oh my gosh.
It was like being on the PacificOcean and like this massive
storm comes right.
Then I hear later that indeedit was actually a lake somewhere
(11:20):
, that typically a storm doesn'texist on that water.
Usually, when winds blow, thelake stays steady.
Yeah, is that right.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
Somewhat, and you
kind of mixed two stories.
But, I'll let the listenerfigure that part out.
I don't want to go into a wholeBible story about that.
But absolutely Also, jen, Ithink it's key to point out that
when you're looking for thispeace or when you're trying to
(11:49):
avoid controlling what'shappening around you, just know
this that the more you yousurrender, the quicker the peace
comes.
Opposed to the fight, the, thecontinuous trying to.
Uh, I'm reminded of a movie, uh, I am legend with will smith.
(12:11):
And when the outbreak ishappening, he says I'm not gonna
let this happen.
And the outbreak is happening,he says I'm not going to let
this happen.
And the thing is is that youcan't stop it from happening.
Life is going to happen nomatter what.
And if it's a chaotic moment,this is so far out of humans'
hands and human reach.
It's unbelievable.
(12:33):
So I just have grown accustomedto stop trying to control every
detail of life.
Now there are things that wecan control and we're very much
aware of that.
I can control my anger.
I can control how much I loveyou.
Sometimes I can't.
I feel like, oh my God, I justlove this woman to death.
But I also know that I can'tminimize my love for you because
(12:58):
I'm angry, right then I need toturn it up, but these are all
within my control.
That I can, you know, have theability to navigate, but then
there are those things that wejust cannot.
Speaker 1 (13:12):
So I stop trying Like
change right, so like surrender
shows up for me, me likeletting go of things that you
cannot change yeah and it's, youknow, crazy because turning 52
yeah, that's how old I am.
Now cory's 53, we're a yearapart hey, I didn't want to tell
him I'm 25 I just did like thisthing where I turned 52 in the
(13:37):
year 2025, and I had a lot ofpensive moments.
I had a lot of alone time,actually on my birthday, funny
enough, and it seemed like I wasbusy, but when I'm in that
space, I'm thinking of otherthings as.
I'm going.
So I was just thinking whathave I learned, like what has
been reciprocated or what kindof things based on how I've
(13:59):
acted and behaved, have now comeback to me like full circle at
52, in the year 2025?
Because, see, there's thatmirroring thing that I just kept
playing with and what I'mreminded of is that there were
things that were so uncertain inour lives from Corey, when we
that I have that big, drasticchange in career because of the
(14:22):
big layoffs, and I pursued aneducation, something, and it led
to other things.
And here's what I'm convinced ofand this is what brings me
peace is that it's been in themoments of uncertainty and just
where you feel like, wow, whereis this going, that it actually
leads you to where you'resupposed to be right you know, I
(14:44):
mean like, oh, that if thatdidn't happen I wouldn't be here
today, or if that didn't happenI wouldn't be who I am today,
right, and so, reflecting onthings like that, I think,
invite peace, because yourealize I wasn't in control of
that and, look it, I ended upmore than okay.
Speaker 2 (15:03):
Right, and I just
want to clarify because I don't
want people to think Jen saidsomething about layoffs and so
is she laid off or did she getlaid off?
No, this was a while back, 2008.
Yeah, so I like to make surethat everyone's on the same page
, so that's why I turned it asquick as possible.
There's one more thing, jen,that I experienced in 52 and
(15:28):
then turning 53.
I felt my age for the firsttime, and I don't mean I felt
like I was 52.
I felt things in my body werechanging.
I felt and I have no controlover it, you know, I'm waking up
and I'm like, oh my goodness,my back really hurts, and I've
(15:49):
never had that achy back feeling.
I remember going to bed a fewnights and saying I'm really
tired, like I'm exhausted, andso, again, these aren't feelings
that I've normally had.
I hadn't changed my diet toomuch anyway, and I hadn't
(16:09):
changed lifestyle too much, andso I could try to control it and
figure out what's wrong, or Icould lean into it and say Corey
, you know what?
You're getting older.
You haven't experienced thisbefore.
It's nothing major, so let'sjust get a better grip on what
(16:29):
your body is doing, opposed totrying to control everything.
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Right, right.
So I love that there's a shiftfrom control to peace.
So control might sound like mybody's changing and I'm going to
prevent that from happeningbecause aging's not going to
happen here.
Speaker 2 (16:51):
I'm not going to get
older.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Everything's got to
go right.
Speaker 2 (16:54):
Right.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
I think that's like
the typical quote for control
and the shift in perspective isI can handle whatever comes.
See, even when you say thatthere's a piece like control is
so intense.
In fact, peace to me is moreresilient than control, right,
(17:15):
because you're bouncing backfrom whatever it is that's
happening in your life.
I think, too, that findingpeace is in the now rather than
in the when, like.
For me it's not a question ofwhen am I going to find peace
(17:35):
Like.
I just welcome finding peacenow.
I don't think this is somethingto really plan for.
You can't create a task list onhow to find peace.
Speaker 2 (17:49):
And, at the end of
the day, what it boils down to
is that we're going to figure itout.
We may not have all the answersright now, we may not be able
to wrap our heads around it, butwe're going to figure it out
because that's what liferequires is for us to figure it
out.
And there was a rule that yougave me some years ago, and I
(18:12):
always remember this rulebecause you said if you can fix
it in six seconds, do it.
Or change it or get it done insix seconds, do it.
If it's going to take you sixmonths, then you might want to.
Speaker 1 (18:26):
Oh, it's six minutes.
Speaker 2 (18:27):
Okay, yeah, can you
give us the actual?
Speaker 1 (18:30):
Yeah.
So if you're thinking aboutsomething and it's going to take
you less than six minutes, thenyou know, stay there, think
about it, don't just let thatfly by.
I've actually changed it.
If you do something in twominutes or less, just do it,
don't pile that up.
And then you can also askyourself is this going to matter
(18:54):
in six months?
And then you can also askyourself is this going to matter
in six months?
If it's not going to matter insix months, like, don't waste
more than six minutes on it,yeah Right.
There's different ways to playwith that.
I really like that one.
Like, if this isn't going tomatter in six months, I'm not
going to waste more than sixminutes on this.
Speaker 2 (19:12):
So let me tell you
something that brought me so
much peace.
Tell you something that broughtme so much peace like
understanding that concept andand applying it to my life.
It just made me have a lot moreunderstanding of where I was
really going with things, youknow yeah, yeah, um.
Speaker 1 (19:31):
I think we've said
this a few times too.
Cory, as I'm listening to youand I remembered my story that I
shared in the beginning ofquitting um, the addiction.
You did not try to exercisecontrol on me I will say it is
tough to watch someone that youlove go through something it is
(19:51):
and what we want to do typicallyis to control it out of your
love for that person and itreally, I feel, is out of fear
of what's going to happen tothat person.
Should they not change?
Should they not do somethingdifferent?
Right, I didn't feel that fromyou when you said silver lining
(20:13):
and seeing the blue cloudsbehind all of the gray and gloom
and doom, right, I really feltthat with you I didn't feel
judged.
I felt like, like you said, I'mgoing to amp up the love
because this is when it reallymatters.
Speaker 2 (20:34):
That's when it really
counts, and I have this
philosophy.
It's not rooted in Corey, it'sanother perspective.
Actually.
I believe in miracles and Ibelieve that miracles happen all
the time, all around us, everyday.
We sometimes don't see him andsometimes we do, but if at the
(20:59):
end of the miracle I'm tired,then I perform the miracle.
Speaker 1 (21:03):
Which is a control
thing, which is a control thing
all over again.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
So I'm looking for
the miracle to be done without
my hands being involved.
Speaker 1 (21:12):
Love that.
I love that so much.
Speaker 2 (21:16):
So Right now, in
later, but or maybe it won't
(21:46):
happen at all.
But it's a constant tug of war,a constant teeter totter to
find all those perfectingredients stars aligning,
planets aligning.
And I say that because you knowwe want what we want.
But again, if we always getwhat we want, then it's us
(22:07):
controlling it and it never getsus where we really want to go.
Tell me one time in your lifewhen everything went exactly
like you wanted it to go and youwere happy.
And that part's the hard part,because we think if it goes
exactly the way I want it, I'llbe all right, right, but that's
(22:28):
not.
That's not the case that's agood.
Speaker 1 (22:33):
I'm really pondering
on that question, because there
have been times in my life whereI thought everything is good.
Now, there, that's the word isgood yeah not perfect but good,
and when you recognize what'sgood, you're not focused and
honed in on what isn't quiteright right right, you just know
(22:56):
that.
Okay, I acknowledge that, butthat's not going to be my focus.
Like, my savings account isn'tas big as I want it to be, but
man, there's so much good therebecause, guess what, in a couple
weeks I can make a deposit,hopefully, right.
So what's good is that?
Um, we, we've got income.
(23:17):
What's good is that?
Right now, cory and I arehealthy enough to walk 20 000
steps at disneyland.
Speaker 2 (23:23):
Uh, maybe suffer a
little for it the next day, and
we did, and are yeah, man, butlet's talk about that real quick
before we get out of here.
How'd you enjoy disneyland?
Speaker 1 (23:36):
okay, I'm just gonna
be forthright.
I enjoy it when it's not hot,like I've asked cory.
Hey, can we just go in themorning craze like, yeah, let's
do it and our, we plan here wego for the full four hours, but
it's been so hot lately I thinkwe're like averaging two and a
(23:57):
half three hours maybe, and thenwe go at night.
Um, for those who don't know,yes, cory and I are disney
adults and we're quite all rightwith that.
I think it helps us just unwind, even though it's hot in a lot
of people, and it keeps usconnected, of course, to play
(24:18):
and all things like imaginationright, yeah, absolutely.
How's it going for you at Disneyduring the summer?
Well?
Speaker 2 (24:29):
I think last night
was a lot better for me, because
what we were able to do is andsee, I can handle heat, I can
handle direct sunlight.
That's what really messes me upis when I gotta deal with that
intense burning heat coming onmy skin.
(24:50):
But what if the sun goes down,as it did last night, and we
went into some of the rides andsaw some of the attractions?
And there's there's some newparades and new uh firework
shows that are happening.
That we've got other shows yeah,we gotta go back and check that
out.
Hey, and if you guys are outthere hearing this, just know
this we're just kids.
We're we're adult kids that wegrew up and we took on
(25:13):
responsibility, but we neverlost that inner child that can
enjoy themselves and have fun.
Speaker 1 (25:22):
Totally so.
It's funny, cause you mentionedDisney.
I have to share this with youTwo thoughts.
Number one is later Remind meof kids that go.
I decided to go to Disney Supercute, you know that kind of way
where you wear the hat Idecided silly, silly decision to
(25:46):
break in a brand new pair ofshoes.
Omg, was I in pain.
Don't do it.
It was so bad, never, ever.
So here are my tips for disneydo not break in new shoes on a
disney day.
And if it's hot, why did I evenbother curling my hair, looking
(26:09):
all cute wearing a bucket hatand within 30 minutes of walking
intensely trying to get towherever it was we were going to
, just loads of sweat under thathat, was not feeling it at all,
but, um, we made the best of it, yeah, we did the best we
(26:29):
really did and oh, go ahead oh,no go ahead.
Speaker 2 (26:33):
Um, if I think you're
gonna say what I what I believe
you're gonna say, uh, I'm gonnajump in on it first, because
what's funny to me is like weleft the house at 7.30, 8
o'clock at night to go toDisneyland and when we get there
, there are kids that are justgetting there or have been there
(26:53):
all day long, and kids will letyou know when they've tapped
out, and so you just hear thiskid in the background, like I'm
like, oh, he's tapped out Time.
To just hear this kid in thebackground, like I'm like, oh,
he's tapped out time to go.
Time to go but mom and dad arestill trying to push.
Speaker 1 (27:08):
Just one more ride,
just one more ride, and I have
to say, cory, that really stuckout to me as we're celebrating
our birthday like we're young 50year olds and what I mean by
that is we started young, right,so our kids are grown, we don't
have grandkids and I'm reallyenjoying just being able to
(27:32):
control how we spend our time.
Yeah, there's that word control,and with that also is knowing
that things can change yeah youknow you make these plans and
I'm still at peace with the factlike, oh, that didn't work
quite out the way, quite the waywe wanted it to, but hey, we
still had a good time.
Um, I was reminded, corey, andI want to put this out there
(27:54):
cause I think this would be sogreat and I am totally speaking
out of turn, I have not checkedthis with Corey, I am totally
speaking out of turn.
I have not checked this withCorey, but I have been thinking
about how blessed we are forbeing able to go and I see the
kids and you can tell when kidsgrow up in Disneyland.
Yeah, you can tell they're verycomfortable there.
(28:15):
Mom's putting them in theirDisney princess outfits, with
the glitter they get their hairdone at Disney.
It's like a whole experience.
And one year we were able togift a Disney trip through the
partnership of my cousin and herhusband.
They had a skateboarding shopin Upland that's no longer there
(28:35):
, but they were so graciousenough to donate Disneyland
tickets.
So, on behalf of Genco Soundco,we'd love to do that, uh, for a
kid, um, this December, andobviously with parents and stuff
.
So I don't know what thatfamily package is going to look
(28:56):
like Uh, but we would love togive that.
So if you know of anyone whohas not been to Disneyland, I'm
going to put this out right nowand we're going to let it grow
Is, please get that informationto us and we'll figure it out
later.
But just know that we're goingto give a family package for a
(29:16):
one day.
Oh, three with three.
Speaker 2 (29:19):
Well, it'd be a one
day trip, but for three, three
tickets, yeah, three.
Well, it'll be a one-day trip,but for three tickets.
Speaker 1 (29:23):
Yeah, there you go.
Speaker 2 (29:25):
Because I mean, you
don't want a kid to have a
ticket and the parents don't.
Speaker 1 (29:28):
Fine, but what if
they have siblings?
See, this is where I go.
Speaker 2 (29:32):
Well, they'll have to
buy at least the siblings
ticket.
Speaker 1 (29:36):
Fine fine, fine, and
Disneyland during the holidays,
for me, is just the best yeah,because I get to wear layered
clothing yes and not sweat itout.
So much I I know we went on arant about disney, but I think
we're just still on the high ofour birthday, our birthday month
(29:59):
.
Speaker 2 (30:00):
You know what I mean
oh yeah, absolutely, and we were
given to very freely, so wewant to be able to give as well
yes, absolutely so.
Speaker 1 (30:09):
Um, that's what I
want to leave with you today is
just some take with youquestions.
So this week, when things don'tgo as planned, ask yourself
will I reach for control, orchoose peace, right, or another
good question, a good, strong,coaching question?
So what's one area of my lifewhere I can practice surrender
(30:30):
and stillness right now?
Speaker 2 (30:33):
I like that, like it
a lot yeah.
Speaker 1 (30:36):
So let me repeat that
question.
It's what's one area of my lifewhere I can practice surrender
and stillness right now, andcory and I will be on this
journey with you and um.
We'll give an update at thenext episode of what, what we've
done, um, and then I think thisis important too like in the
episode cory, today I mentionedwhat a rock you were for me
(30:59):
during a time of just chaos iswho or what reminds me of peace,
and how can I invite more ofthat or more of that person into
my daily routine?
So if there's something thatyou've done in the past that has
brought you peace and you'vejust kind of fell off, invite it
(31:20):
back, right.
Speaker 2 (31:23):
And tell it you are
welcome here.
Speaker 1 (31:25):
Absolutely,
Absolutely Anything else you
want to add to this beautifullydone episode.
Corey, thanks for sharing thatquote with us.
Speaker 2 (31:34):
Yeah, I think it was
a appropriate quote and
appropriate topic to have aconversation about.
No, I'm good.
Speaker 1 (31:43):
Beautiful.
Well, we hope that you'reenjoying your Labor Day Monday.
I think that's a total Americanthing.
If you're listening to us andyou're our friends in Europe and
Asia, australia and thePhilippines, that's where a lot
of our listeners are tuning inright now.
Thanks for being here with us.
(32:04):
We really appreciate you, yep,and you know us to take the
elevator.
We say look up and let'selevate Every day, elevate,
every day, elevate, every day,elevate, every day, elevate.