October 20, 2025 • 35 mins
What if the spark you want isn’t missing—it’s just waiting for a better container? We zoom into the heart of our series on relationships: how creativity sustains love and trust across seasons. For parents, it’s not about elaborate plans; it’s about small acts that make a child feel uniquely seen—voices in bedtime stories, joint kitchen experiments, and rituals that turn chores into connection. For friendships, we share the power of custom traditions like a traveling birthday bag or quick voice memos that cut through distance. And for marriage, we open up about co writing children’s books, blending styles, and designing dates that resist autopilot—because novelty with meaning changes everything.
We also offer practical prompts to turn chaos into clarity and show why willingness beats talent. If you’ve ever felt stuck, overwhelmed by your own script, or unsure how to keep the spark alive, this conversation will give you tools you can use tonight: reframe friction as data, partner with real needs, and create rituals that scale love. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs a gentle pivot, and leave a review with your A, B, and C for thriving relationships—we’ll read our favorites on the show.
Look up, and let's elevate!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
unknown (00:02):
Every day.
Hello.
Every day.
SPEAKER_02 (00:13):
Hey, it's Jen the Builder.
And Corey.
I paused for a moment, Corey,there, because you know what I
was thinking.
I was like, I wonder if we'regonna be able to make this 30
minutes because we have beengoing a little bit over.
SPEAKER_01 (00:28):
A lot of bit over, but it's all good.
SPEAKER_02 (00:31):
Yes, it is.
And we've been gone for a coupleweeks.
Man, so I feel like there's somuch there.
SPEAKER_01 (00:38):
There's a lot.
Yeah, there's a whole lot here.
So let's get ready to unpack awhole bunch of stuff.
SPEAKER_02 (00:44):
Yeah, but first, hello everyone.
Yay! How's it going?
Hello.
It's so good to be here withyou.
We have a lot to catch up on,but just want to prelude this
with after the little bit ofannouncements and updates.
Uh, we are on the last part ofthe series of relationships, the
see today.
Stay tuned.
(01:05):
It's about creativity andrelationships and how it keeps
the spark going.
So if you desire to keep thespark going and the
relationships you love, stayhere with us.
SPEAKER_01 (01:18):
Stay tuned.
SPEAKER_02 (01:19):
Yes, tune in.
Lean in.
SPEAKER_01 (01:21):
So, Jen, tell us, let's just lightly brush over
some of these amazing eventsthat we both had an opportunity
to be a part of.
Uh, let's start with Inlandia,the book fair that was in
Riverside.
In Riverside, yes.
The library.
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (01:41):
First, the building is huge.
SPEAKER_01 (01:43):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (01:44):
I wanted to go in, but it was it was so special
because it's the first onethey've had.
SPEAKER_00 (01:50):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (01:51):
So anytime it's the first, they're getting a feel
for it.
I just want to give a shout outto the group of volunteers and
the staff that put thattogether.
They were so welcoming.
They were figuring it out asthey went and they did such a
beautiful job.
Thank you for the accommodationsfor the vendors.
I really appreciated the airconditioned space because it was
(02:13):
flipping hot that day.
SPEAKER_01 (02:15):
It was a monstrous of a hot day.
SPEAKER_02 (02:17):
Yes, and I got to use indoor restrooms versus
potter potties.
Yes.
Um, which if I had to would befine, but didn't have to.
SPEAKER_01 (02:26):
No, and they gave us some cold water and they really
just kind of looked out for usto make sure that we were okay.
SPEAKER_02 (02:34):
Yeah, absolutely.
So we met some really coolauthors.
Yeah, so much fun.
To my left was Nidia, and shelives here in Fontana, and for
the life of me, I can't rememberthe name of her books, but it is
around Hispanic culture and thefamily.
So her first book was writtenabout her family, um, husband,
(02:59):
daughter, and son.
And then to our right was Julianand his beautiful wife, Debbie.
SPEAKER_00 (03:05):
Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_02 (03:05):
And he wrote his first book on poetry saying, uh,
what it was it again?
SPEAKER_01 (03:10):
Um connected to me somehow, some way or something
to that effect.
SPEAKER_02 (03:15):
Yeah, somehow connected to me somehow.
SPEAKER_01 (03:18):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (03:19):
Um, very well done.
They had a good turnout.
Oh, I'm sorry, I have to say,and we read to kiddos and people
who came to see us.
That was fun.
SPEAKER_01 (03:30):
Let me let me pause real quick right there, Jim,
because um our our two o'clockreading came around, and there
was no one sitting in thechairs.
It was a ghost town.
SPEAKER_02 (03:41):
And we had people show up for it, but it was like
a handful, right?
SPEAKER_01 (03:45):
Yeah, well, I'm getting to that.
Okay.
So there was no one over theresitting, and so the people that
came to hear us read was withus.
So just looking at that was alittle daunting because I was
thinking to myself, we're aboutto read to the people we invited
here, which would have beenfine.
SPEAKER_02 (04:03):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (04:03):
But on the flip side of it, Jen had did a little bit
of undercover hustle and ranaround connecting to the kids
that day.
Ran around and talked to somekiddos.
And so they were made, they wereprompt on time, and ready to
rock and roll.
And let me tell you, that was ablast.
It's it's not for me, it'snothing like reading the book
(04:26):
and the funny parts that Iintended to be funny.
You hear the little giggles.
SPEAKER_02 (04:31):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (04:32):
That that just makes my day.
It just it just makes me feel soamazing.
SPEAKER_02 (04:37):
Yeah, it's one of the best parts, isn't it?
SPEAKER_01 (04:39):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:40):
For me, following the reading is when the kids
came to our table and Corey,they just acted like they knew
Kelly Kinga, like she was thehomie.
SPEAKER_00 (04:49):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:49):
She's like, I want that book.
That's Kelly Kinga.
I said, What was your favoritepart?
And they were just able to talkabout what they loved most about
the book.
Um, it remember that little girlwhen we asked her what her
favorite part was?
I loved it.
Love your answer.
She said, When Kenny got lost.
SPEAKER_01 (05:11):
Yeah, that was that was pretty funny.
SPEAKER_02 (05:13):
So good.
SPEAKER_01 (05:14):
Just not one of the parts of the book you would
think people would really like,but she really liked the fact
that this uh baby Marsupio waslost and on his own.
SPEAKER_02 (05:25):
Yeah, in the dark.
That was good.
So that was in Landia.
SPEAKER_00 (05:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (05:30):
And then during that same week, I feel, right?
Like just a few days later, wewere at the 39th Annual
Children's Network Conference atthe Ontario Convention Center.
SPEAKER_01 (05:42):
Which was pretty ginormous.
And and forgive my my wording,but I I use words that mean a
lot to me.
That I would normally sayginormous, but I know that
that's just a little bit toofar, but it was pretty big.
SPEAKER_02 (05:56):
Well, let me wait, wait, wait.
Let me just share.
I get to be married to Corey,who is one of the most creative
writers I know.
So he would have referenced thegrandness of this or the
massiveness of this as he'slike, it was Macedonia.
SPEAKER_00 (06:18):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (06:18):
So it was definitely Macedonia.
Definitely.
SPEAKER_01 (06:23):
Um, yeah, we walked into this place, and I'm not
even talking about where we wereset up as far as that table,
just in the Ontario ConventionCenter, and the the conference
just branded amazingly.
Branded all throughout the thewalkway.
So when we put post these videosand put uh some of the um social
(06:45):
media stuff up, you'll see theyheld nothing back as far as
rolling the red carpet out forus.
And so then you get to the roomwhere the vendors were, and
again, just roll it out for us,took really good care of us,
gave us top-notch everythingservice.
Uh they fed us, they made surethat we were in the most
(07:10):
comfortable accommodationspossible.
And then the networking.
You want to touch on that, Jen?
SPEAKER_02 (07:18):
There's so much networking.
We met tons of people that werein service to the community.
SPEAKER_01 (07:27):
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (07:28):
Uh it I was just floored because there's so many
different so types of people,those who work with foster kids
and foster parents, those who umempathy for autism in California
is one.
And we've already plugged intoher.
We met some podcasters.
SPEAKER_01 (07:48):
Yeah, we met people who feed the homeless, who some
podcasters that are gonna joinus on the show.
SPEAKER_02 (07:54):
Yes, we've got a couple actually, so that's up
and coming.
Yeah.
So I love the podcast name ofthis duet, and I don't want to
give their names up, but theirpodcast is Talk Early With Me.
SPEAKER_01 (08:11):
Talk Early To Me.
SPEAKER_02 (08:12):
Talk Early To Me.
SPEAKER_01 (08:13):
Yeah, something to that effect.
SPEAKER_02 (08:15):
Yeah, it's about early child development.
SPEAKER_01 (08:17):
Right.
But we're gonna get it all, soyou're not gonna have to guess
on what it is.
SPEAKER_02 (08:21):
Yeah, and then we got invited to other events,
yeah.
Which is so fun, and I can'twait till we get to talk about
the creative creativity in thatspace once we get to that part
of this episode.
SPEAKER_01 (08:33):
And I gotta cover this and then I'll let it go.
Um, it's just wonderful to runinto like-minded individuals.
It's also amazing when you gotadvocates fighting for the same
thing that you're fighting for,for literacy, for safe places,
for kids not to be harmed, forkids not to be abused, for kids
not to be trafficked, for kidsto be able to have a safe home
(08:57):
environment.
And you got all these levels ofpeople working together.
It's not as hopeless as we thinkit is.
So I'm just sending a shout outto the children's conference,
uh, children's networkingconference for being such a huge
advocate for the same type ofwork that we're advocating for.
SPEAKER_02 (09:17):
Yeah.
So here's my last thing beforewe get into the the episode is
when you look at them and we'reall going through budget cuts, a
bit of a crisis in the financialworld right now.
SPEAKER_00 (09:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (09:34):
When you come across a non-profit and they've got a
fundraiser and you're able togive, maybe it's not money,
maybe you can volunteer, but itjust really impressed on me what
community means, especially.
I think community actuallybecomes more outstanding when
it's above the financialconstraints, and there's
(09:56):
something that happens when it'sbuilt from um uncertainty, a
little bit of feeling of chaosfor like what's happening here.
SPEAKER_00 (10:06):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (10:06):
So just want to encourage everyone who's doing
the work that um we stand byyou, and your work is not going
in vain.
SPEAKER_01 (10:15):
We're definitely gonna stand by and stand strong.
And and as Jen said, but the onething I did not hear, I didn't
hear anybody complain aboutmoney.
SPEAKER_02 (10:23):
No, not at all.
SPEAKER_01 (10:23):
And hear anybody talk about the budget was short
or they didn't have enoughmoney.
Everyone knew what the work wasabout.
They just buckled in and got itdone.
SPEAKER_02 (10:32):
That's right.
SPEAKER_01 (10:33):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (10:34):
So it's so appropriate that we would talk
about creativity for the lastpart of this series.
What we believe here is thatwhen we honor the creative
spark, whether it be in amarriage, a partnership, working
relationship, friendship,parent-child, that it keeps the
(10:54):
love, the connection, and thegrowth alive.
So we're gonna jump in andexplore it a little bit.
And Corey, if it's okay withyou, let's start with the
parent-child relationship.
SPEAKER_01 (11:04):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (11:05):
So, how do you see creativity bridging the
generations between parent andchild?
SPEAKER_01 (11:16):
Um, well, that's it's difficult for me because
I'm not involved in thatrelationship currently, as far
as you know, child parent.
Uh, I do talk to our children,obviously, but it's it's it's
such a different level ofcommunication at this point.
Um I definitely remember what itwas like to be creative with the
(11:41):
kids, and I told them, I gavethem a heads up on what I was
doing.
So they it nothing shocked themor hit them by storm.
Uh, I I did not lie to our kids.
I promised them that I wouldn'tlie to them, and so I tried to
keep that to a hundred percentto just tell them exactly what
it was so that I didn't have todouble back.
(12:02):
And that was one of my mostcreative ways to build a good,
positive, strong relationshipwith them.
And if it was something that Icouldn't talk to them about, I
probably shouldn't have beendoing it.
So I I just didn't even ventureinto that world of what I
shouldn't be doing.
I just told them like it was.
SPEAKER_02 (12:21):
Yeah, I really love that, and I'm gonna bring up
some things that I feel aregonna be pretty nostalgic.
So when I think of us as parentsto our children, I remember
things like you playing Bratzdolls with Kayla and making up a
whole story and actually gettingin her room, having the dolls in
(12:46):
your hands, and they're havingdialogue.
And I just thought that wasreally special, right?
SPEAKER_01 (12:52):
Um, I remember that.
That was that was pretty cool.
SPEAKER_02 (12:55):
Yeah.
And then we would have creativefun with the kids in the
neighborhood.
SPEAKER_00 (13:01):
Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_02 (13:02):
We had dance-offs, um, they had little parties in
the backyard, and then Kaylawould have her friends over and
they'd build like blanket forts,and we might have been a part of
that or just like checked in onthem.
SPEAKER_01 (13:16):
Definitely was a part of it, definitely helped
build the the structures of theforts, and and I just remember
knowing that I needed to bepresent a hundred percent, no
matter what.
I also knew that I I wasn't okaywith kids outside playing by
themselves and strange thingshappening, uh awkward kissing
(13:40):
moments or awkward likingmoments, awkward touching
moments.
I wasn't having it.
I just was like, if I'm there,it won't happen.
So I'm always gonna be there.
Right.
To the point to it was a littlebit of a detriment because kids
was knocking on the door askingme, Can I come out and play?
And I'm like, uh, our kids areout of town, so no, I will not
(14:00):
be coming out to play with you.
SPEAKER_02 (14:02):
Right.
Yeah, that was super fun.
And I think that also expandedinto us working with youth.
So our kids were in the youthgroup and talk about creativity.
Um, I think it was important forkids to see adults being
playful, imaginative, andcurious.
(14:23):
So during that time, Corey, youwrote a play called Circus
Bazaar.
We were doing dancing, we werehaving the kids play
instruments, getting them behindthe microphone to sing.
They were doing video ads forchurch announcements.
It was unbelievable the level ofcreativity, and it just kept
(14:45):
giving.
And what I loved about it isthat those activities made these
kids feel uniquely seen.
SPEAKER_00 (14:55):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (14:56):
Right.
So we brought out their gifts.
And so the question I would askany parent who's listening right
now is what story, song, oractivity would make your child
feel uniquely seen by you today?
Let's say it's a bedtime storyand they like to do voices or
they like to sing, incorporatethat in there, right?
(15:17):
Or just creating an everydaytask and turning it into
creative bond moment, bondingmoment.
Cooking is perfect.
SPEAKER_00 (15:24):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (15:25):
Cooking, just being in that kitchen and creating
something new together,phenomenal stuff.
All right.
Um, oh yeah, I'm gonna put aplug in here because that's why
I love the fuzzy furry forestbooks, because parents,
guardians, you can make the mostfun with these books by giving
(15:47):
the characters um your voice andjust having fun with the
dialogue.
SPEAKER_01 (15:54):
Not only your voice, but your energy as well.
Yeah, and that's where the truecreativity comes in, is when you
lend that energy into whatyou're trying to accomplish with
your own your own child or yourown uh children in the setting
where you're reading the book.
SPEAKER_02 (16:12):
Yes, absolutely.
So let's talk really quick aboutcreativity and friendship, and
we're gonna mix this in withfamily.
Um creativity.
I have friends who are out ofstate, and we don't even stay
connected on a phone call.
It's through every other way.
But it's how sometimes you canstay connected across distance,
(16:35):
time, and life seasons, right?
And even your friends that youget to see all the time.
So when I think about this,Corey, because you know, this is
my favorite, one of my favoritethings to do, is you send a
funny birthday voice memo, oryou do something different for
their birthday, or you start atradition that's just for you
(16:57):
two.
So for example, I have a reallygood friend, and our tradition
now is when we do birthdaysamongst each other, we use the
same bag, right?
And I've I have this otherfriend with her friend, they
have a Snapchat going on forthousands and thousands of days
now.
SPEAKER_01 (17:16):
I so I'm gonna back up just a little bit.
I did not know that.
So say more about the bag thingbecause that's pretty
interesting.
It's like the sisterhood of thetraveling pants, but it's the
birthday bag of travelingbirthdays.
SPEAKER_02 (17:30):
So when it's her birthday, I gift her and it's in
that bag.
She holds on to it when it's mybirthday.
I know it's coming in that bag.
SPEAKER_01 (17:37):
That's pretty nice.
I like that.
SPEAKER_02 (17:39):
And we and we take really good care of that bag.
SPEAKER_01 (17:41):
I bet.
SPEAKER_02 (17:43):
Um, yeah, I just think that is creative.
Yeah, that's really cool.
Can you think of anything thatyou might have done in a
friendship or in family thatbrings creativity?
SPEAKER_01 (17:54):
To that level, no, but uh, I mean, that's pretty
cool.
I'm sitting here thinking, like,man, I've I don't think I've
ever done anything like that.
Oh no.
SPEAKER_02 (18:03):
I I I think it's great that you have a family
chat and that you just like dothese rando texts in there.
SPEAKER_01 (18:12):
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Um, well, I mean, I kind ofthink I and tell me if I'm
wrong.
I I think that most families,uh, and not the entire family,
but the you know, parts of thefamily, cousins or uncles, uh,
you know, brothers and sistersor whatever, have some kind of
chat.
And what's fun for me is just todo a random check-in.
(18:34):
Like, yeah, just hey um happyFriday.
Just checking in with thefamily.
Hope everyone's doing good, havea great weekend.
And then everybody chimes in,and it's just it's great because
you get to hear or not not hearphysically, but hear everyone
check in.
So it's great.
SPEAKER_02 (18:53):
Yeah, that's that's beautiful.
Last but not least, speaking ofrandom creativity means you're
creating a new way of being.
So we've talked about on thepodcast where you and I, Corey,
went to Arizona for yourcousin's birthday.
We have a lot of family, and ifwe were to do that for
(19:15):
everybody, that would beintense.
But this was a special birthday,right?
She's turning 60.
SPEAKER_01 (19:21):
Turning turning 60, and um, excuse me.
And we hadn't seen her in a verylong time.
I hadn't actually saw her inprobably 10-15 years, and this
was my dad's sister's child, andand probably shouldn't let that
(19:41):
kind of time go by withoutseeing your first cousin like
that.
SPEAKER_02 (19:45):
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, let's welcomecreativity in that space and get
out of the mundane and bringsome joy in into there and some
surprises that always somethingnew in time.
Yes, all right.
So, let's go uh creativity inmarriage.
SPEAKER_01 (20:05):
Okay, now we're in my lane.
All right, I can speak a littlebit more free.
Go ahead, give me the question.
SPEAKER_02 (20:11):
Okay, just right there.
Um we know that in marriagethings can fall into a routine,
right?
So, what have you done that'screatively reawakened our spark?
Mmm, yes, I like that that's thequestion, though.
(20:35):
Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01 (20:37):
I didn't know that was an actual question.
No, I'm playing.
I knew that was a question.
SPEAKER_02 (20:42):
Okay.
SPEAKER_01 (20:43):
No, I just try to keep it different and keep it
um, I try to stay on my toes.
That way I'm keeping you on yourtoes, and then I think you're
doing the same thing.
So it's not the same oldrestaurant, it's not the same
old uh places to to go andthings to do.
Where anybody that knows usknows we love Disney, and so
(21:05):
we're always going there.
So we just try to sprinkle alittle bit of special, special
sauce on it to do something alittle bit different every once
in a while.
SPEAKER_02 (21:13):
Yeah, I think our biggest creative moment was
writing the books together,right?
Because the first two were you.
SPEAKER_01 (21:22):
Say more.
SPEAKER_02 (21:22):
I got to play in that with you, but the third,
and then books going forward,Corey's like, let's write it
together.
And that was another level ofcreativity because it's putting
both writing styles together,coming as one on a storyline.
That's been really fun.
SPEAKER_01 (21:43):
Um, can I can I speak to that a little bit?
SPEAKER_02 (21:46):
Please do.
SPEAKER_01 (21:47):
Um, I I honestly felt like the first two books
were really well-written books,but I felt honestly like that
third book was so much moreelevated, so much more
descriptive, and it gave afullness of the characters and
what was going on, and so we wecarried that mantra into the
(22:11):
fourth book as well, and so I'mjust really excited about that
creativity that I was lacking,and I'm not you know too proud
to say, hey, there was more tobe added to this.
SPEAKER_02 (22:25):
Thanks, Puna.
SPEAKER_01 (22:26):
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_02 (22:28):
So during creativity too, and I think the reason why
it's so important in a marriage,in a partnership, is because
there's a willingness to evolveand bring some new things.
So I we're gonna share a moment.
We were talking about thechildren's network conference
(22:49):
that just happened this pastweek.
And I'm going to talk about twowords that totally can exist in
the same space.
And actually, when there'schaos, creativity I feel gets
elevated.
Um so I was stuck on atechnicality.
(23:13):
Here's my type A, my type Apersonality, the left side of my
brain.
I got stuck on an invoice, and Iwas so convinced that the math
was wrong.
And I was convinced on a pricethat it should have been, and I
got stuck.
And when you get stuck, you'renot paying attention to the
(23:35):
opportunities that are in frontof you, just all the different
ways to be creative because Ifeel I feel that being stuck
actually opposes creativity, andso it felt chaotic.
And in so many words, you toldme this feels chaotic right
(23:55):
there in the middle of OntarioConvention Center, day two.
Was it day two?
Yeah, it was day two.
Yeah.
And I learned so much from thatmoment, and you said, Jen, we
need to figure this out andreset.
Here's the things that we don'tknow as of yet, and this is
something that we can visitlater.
(24:15):
So it took me a minute to reset.
I'm very aware of that.
And what I loved about that timeis that it worked as a catalyst.
So let me talk a little bit moreto add to the level of chaos.
So there, there's me, day two.
Another part of the chaos is wehad Corey and I had this
(24:38):
wonderful elevator pitch that weput together that we were
confident in.
We had our marketing materialall around us, and it just
wasn't hitting with people.
And it dawned on us that theseare social workers, community
health workers, psychiatrists,therapists, this is the work
that they do.
(24:58):
They teach, they're educators,they have and they shared with
us, we have so much curriculum,we can't even get through it.
So, although they honored andappreciated our work as authors
and as curriculum designers andbeing presenters and musicians
and all that, it just wasn'tclicking.
(25:22):
And so one could say, Oh man,this was a wash, right?
Like, what are we doing here?
And in comes Corey creativespace, what happened then?
SPEAKER_01 (25:33):
Um, I just saw an opportunity to pivot, and I also
saw another opportunity to leaninto what I know we're we are
very creative and good at.
And upon seeing that, it was inreal time, so I didn't have time
to just say, okay, time outeverybody.
Let me go and have thisconversation with Jen real
(25:54):
quick, so she'll know what pagewe're on.
I just started evolving in thatmoment, and then what I realized
was that there was a need, andwe could could provide an answer
to that need, but I needed toanswer it right away.
So uh I began to also applyanother aspect of our gifts and
(26:17):
abilities, which is publicspeaking.
Um, we've both been in thatspace many, many times, having
fun with it because that's whatwe love to do.
We and especially with kids andyouth.
Um, as Jen said earlier, we workwith youth for uh about seven
years together, and then I hadmy own time when I was working
(26:39):
in the non-public school system.
Uh, long story short, or maybeeven a little bit longer, uh, we
just pivot when we get stuck.
We pivot when we get chaos, andthat's when creativity really
starts to breathe.
SPEAKER_02 (26:54):
Yeah, I what I saw was that it just thrived in the
unknown.
Corey and I started thinking,what do we do well that they may
not do well and may beinterested in?
Speaking, music, soundtrack,podcasting, how to write in
(27:17):
journal, how to self-publish,what's that process look like?
So we're real time gettingdeeper into what Genko Sound
Company is gonna do.
Yeah, and it was just excitingbecause I'm listening to you
create the elevator pitch realtime on the workshops, and then
I started being able to see itand then being able to talk
(27:41):
about it, right?
And it totally dismantled thethought process of this is the
way it's always been done, orthis is the way we practice.
So, you know, what do we do?
Well, what you do is you createspace for new thinking, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (27:56):
You never get stuck in trying to make a uh square
peg go into a round hole.
Yes, you always have to think alittle bit outside of the box.
Now, that's not to say that wealways get it right, and that's
not not to say that we haven'tbeen there with that hammer
trying to force it in, but I'vehad enough train wrecks in my
(28:17):
life to know that this is notworking, I gotta try something
else.
SPEAKER_02 (28:22):
Yes, and I want to give a little sales 101, and
it's something we knew, and it'sinteresting when you know
things, but you don't lean intoit, right?
So creativity reactivatespossibility, and it was
brilliant when we we also sharedout loud.
(28:43):
Let's hear what they do, let'sshare then briefly what we do
and ask them what's thepossibility of us partnering and
coming together?
Yeah, how can you use us?
How can we be of service to you?
SPEAKER_01 (28:59):
And even more so, how can they see us working with
them?
Yes, to bring about a better uhoutcome in what they're doing.
SPEAKER_02 (29:07):
Yeah.
So I think when we limitourselves, it forces us to think
resourcefully because we werelimiting.
We kind of put this ceiling onus, like this is what we do.
But then when we realized wewere limiting, we went outside
of that container and went intoresource mode, right?
(29:28):
Like, okay, this is what we needto do.
Um, I think there was definitelysome groundbreaking ideas during
that time, which was a surprise.
And I feel like um the questionI asked myself is what can we do
with what we already have orwhat we already know?
(29:48):
So there was more direction andguidance by being open to being
creative.
SPEAKER_00 (29:53):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (29:54):
And I could go on and on and on.
SPEAKER_01 (29:58):
And I know we sound like we're Very excited.
It's because we are.
SPEAKER_00 (30:02):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:02):
And it it's it's exciting to be in the moment and
living in the moment opposed tothrowing in the towel and
saying, you know what, I giveup.
This isn't working.
I can't believe we did all thisfor absolutely nothing, and now
everyone says they already haveeverything I need that I have.
SPEAKER_00 (30:23):
Yes.
SPEAKER_01 (30:24):
But that that's not the end of the story.
And you write your story.
SPEAKER_02 (30:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:29):
It's up to each individual to say, this is
enough, or I have more.
SPEAKER_02 (30:35):
Yeah.
Absolutely.
And something else, too, that Isaw in people all around us in
between the event in Riversideand then in Ontario is we met
talented people, and creativityfor me is less about talent and
more about willingness.
(30:56):
Because you can be talented andnot be willing to create, not be
willing to collaborate, not bewilling to partner, right?
SPEAKER_01 (31:03):
Yeah, and let's address that.
SPEAKER_02 (31:05):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (31:06):
That in itself is a gift to be willing to do that.
To be to have the the kind ofheart to say, I'm willing to
collaborate with you, eventhough I don't know you, even
though I haven't seen what youdo completely.
And that's what a lot of whatwas going on happening in real
(31:28):
time.
And I loved it, not just withus, but with everybody.
And here's another thing (31:31):
there was a lot of trust going on
amongst so many different groupsof people, so many different
walks of life.
And I'm talking about from raceto uh personality to
backgrounds, and you're talkingabout educators with therapists
(31:51):
and social workers and authorsand then entrepreneurs, and
everyone is trusting each otherin this space, having honest
conversation, which is amazing.
So that all that creativity initself was pretty moving.
SPEAKER_02 (32:07):
Absolutely.
So for those who are interestedin writing, and those who might
want to go further and go lookinto self-publishing, Corey and
I are doing workshops.
So those will be announced soon.
But let me start with someprompts that can really help you
(32:27):
in the space of writing based onwhat we've talked about.
So think about these questions,don't overthink them, and then
just write your response, right?
So think about a time when youcreated something beautiful
during a difficult season andwhat it taught you.
So what's something you createdduring a difficult season and
(32:50):
what did it teach you?
Next question, if you wantanother one or that other one
didn't speak to you, is whatdoes my inner voice say when
things feel chaotic?
And how can I lean intocreativity to help me respond
differently?
So using creativity to be aresponse mechanism.
(33:16):
Third, what creative outlethelps me process stress or
uncertainty?
A creative outlet that helps youprocess stress and uncertainty.
I do want to put a PS in here.
Creativity does not necessarilymean art, a book, a you know,
(33:39):
drawing, music.
Creativity means you're bringingsomething forward that's new.
It could be creativity in theway you hold a meeting,
honestly.
Yeah, creativity is also problemsolving, right?
So that is what we're invitingin our relationships is be
creative.
SPEAKER_01 (34:00):
And and even and I'm when I say this, not last and
definitely not least, butthinking outside of the normal
parameters that you're allowingyourself to think as a form of
creativity.
You you've just given yourself afree lane to operate in so that
you can come up with somethingyou've never come up with
(34:22):
before.
SPEAKER_02 (34:22):
Yeah.
Be bold.
I know my creativity is silly.
Be curious, and it creativityisn't perfection.
I think we've established it's awillingness, right?
Um, well, Corey, I love theABCs.
It would definitely take me on ajourney.
I was surprised as to what wecame up with.
(34:45):
Um, I thought it was prettycreative.
SPEAKER_01 (34:48):
I thought I think we had to live a few of those
moments in order to completethis series.
SPEAKER_02 (34:54):
Yeah, agreed.
So, elevators friends, we hopeyou've laughed, cried,
journaled, and grown with usthrough this series.
And now we invite you toactually write your own
alphabet, your own ABCs forrelationships, one intentional
act of creativity at a time,three letters, ABCs.
(35:15):
What would you define asnecessary for relationships to
thrive?
Well, you know us to take theelevator.
We say, look up and let'selevate every day, elevate every
day, elevate every day, elevate,every day.
Every day.
Hello.
Every day.
SPEAKER_02 (00:13):
Hey, it's Jen the Builder.
And Corey.
I paused for a moment, Corey,there, because you know what I
was thinking.
I was like, I wonder if we'regonna be able to make this 30
minutes because we have beengoing a little bit over.
SPEAKER_01 (00:28):
A lot of bit over, but it's all good.
SPEAKER_02 (00:31):
Yes, it is.
And we've been gone for a coupleweeks.
Man, so I feel like there's somuch there.
SPEAKER_01 (00:38):
There's a lot.
Yeah, there's a whole lot here.
So let's get ready to unpack awhole bunch of stuff.
SPEAKER_02 (00:44):
Yeah, but first, hello everyone.
Yay! How's it going?
Hello.
It's so good to be here withyou.
We have a lot to catch up on,but just want to prelude this
with after the little bit ofannouncements and updates.
Uh, we are on the last part ofthe series of relationships, the
see today.
Stay tuned.
(01:05):
It's about creativity andrelationships and how it keeps
the spark going.
So if you desire to keep thespark going and the
relationships you love, stayhere with us.
SPEAKER_01 (01:18):
Stay tuned.
SPEAKER_02 (01:19):
Yes, tune in.
Lean in.
SPEAKER_01 (01:21):
So, Jen, tell us, let's just lightly brush over
some of these amazing eventsthat we both had an opportunity
to be a part of.
Uh, let's start with Inlandia,the book fair that was in
Riverside.
In Riverside, yes.
The library.
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (01:41):
First, the building is huge.
SPEAKER_01 (01:43):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (01:44):
I wanted to go in, but it was it was so special
because it's the first onethey've had.
SPEAKER_00 (01:50):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (01:51):
So anytime it's the first, they're getting a feel
for it.
I just want to give a shout outto the group of volunteers and
the staff that put thattogether.
They were so welcoming.
They were figuring it out asthey went and they did such a
beautiful job.
Thank you for the accommodationsfor the vendors.
I really appreciated the airconditioned space because it was
(02:13):
flipping hot that day.
SPEAKER_01 (02:15):
It was a monstrous of a hot day.
SPEAKER_02 (02:17):
Yes, and I got to use indoor restrooms versus
potter potties.
Yes.
Um, which if I had to would befine, but didn't have to.
SPEAKER_01 (02:26):
No, and they gave us some cold water and they really
just kind of looked out for usto make sure that we were okay.
SPEAKER_02 (02:34):
Yeah, absolutely.
So we met some really coolauthors.
Yeah, so much fun.
To my left was Nidia, and shelives here in Fontana, and for
the life of me, I can't rememberthe name of her books, but it is
around Hispanic culture and thefamily.
So her first book was writtenabout her family, um, husband,
(02:59):
daughter, and son.
And then to our right was Julianand his beautiful wife, Debbie.
SPEAKER_00 (03:05):
Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_02 (03:05):
And he wrote his first book on poetry saying, uh,
what it was it again?
SPEAKER_01 (03:10):
Um connected to me somehow, some way or something
to that effect.
SPEAKER_02 (03:15):
Yeah, somehow connected to me somehow.
SPEAKER_01 (03:18):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (03:19):
Um, very well done.
They had a good turnout.
Oh, I'm sorry, I have to say,and we read to kiddos and people
who came to see us.
That was fun.
SPEAKER_01 (03:30):
Let me let me pause real quick right there, Jim,
because um our our two o'clockreading came around, and there
was no one sitting in thechairs.
It was a ghost town.
SPEAKER_02 (03:41):
And we had people show up for it, but it was like
a handful, right?
SPEAKER_01 (03:45):
Yeah, well, I'm getting to that.
Okay.
So there was no one over theresitting, and so the people that
came to hear us read was withus.
So just looking at that was alittle daunting because I was
thinking to myself, we're aboutto read to the people we invited
here, which would have beenfine.
SPEAKER_02 (04:03):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (04:03):
But on the flip side of it, Jen had did a little bit
of undercover hustle and ranaround connecting to the kids
that day.
Ran around and talked to somekiddos.
And so they were made, they wereprompt on time, and ready to
rock and roll.
And let me tell you, that was ablast.
It's it's not for me, it'snothing like reading the book
(04:26):
and the funny parts that Iintended to be funny.
You hear the little giggles.
SPEAKER_02 (04:31):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (04:32):
That that just makes my day.
It just it just makes me feel soamazing.
SPEAKER_02 (04:37):
Yeah, it's one of the best parts, isn't it?
SPEAKER_01 (04:39):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:40):
For me, following the reading is when the kids
came to our table and Corey,they just acted like they knew
Kelly Kinga, like she was thehomie.
SPEAKER_00 (04:49):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (04:49):
She's like, I want that book.
That's Kelly Kinga.
I said, What was your favoritepart?
And they were just able to talkabout what they loved most about
the book.
Um, it remember that little girlwhen we asked her what her
favorite part was?
I loved it.
Love your answer.
She said, When Kenny got lost.
SPEAKER_01 (05:11):
Yeah, that was that was pretty funny.
SPEAKER_02 (05:13):
So good.
SPEAKER_01 (05:14):
Just not one of the parts of the book you would
think people would really like,but she really liked the fact
that this uh baby Marsupio waslost and on his own.
SPEAKER_02 (05:25):
Yeah, in the dark.
That was good.
So that was in Landia.
SPEAKER_00 (05:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (05:30):
And then during that same week, I feel, right?
Like just a few days later, wewere at the 39th Annual
Children's Network Conference atthe Ontario Convention Center.
SPEAKER_01 (05:42):
Which was pretty ginormous.
And and forgive my my wording,but I I use words that mean a
lot to me.
That I would normally sayginormous, but I know that
that's just a little bit toofar, but it was pretty big.
SPEAKER_02 (05:56):
Well, let me wait, wait, wait.
Let me just share.
I get to be married to Corey,who is one of the most creative
writers I know.
So he would have referenced thegrandness of this or the
massiveness of this as he'slike, it was Macedonia.
SPEAKER_00 (06:18):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (06:18):
So it was definitely Macedonia.
Definitely.
SPEAKER_01 (06:23):
Um, yeah, we walked into this place, and I'm not
even talking about where we wereset up as far as that table,
just in the Ontario ConventionCenter, and the the conference
just branded amazingly.
Branded all throughout the thewalkway.
So when we put post these videosand put uh some of the um social
(06:45):
media stuff up, you'll see theyheld nothing back as far as
rolling the red carpet out forus.
And so then you get to the roomwhere the vendors were, and
again, just roll it out for us,took really good care of us,
gave us top-notch everythingservice.
Uh they fed us, they made surethat we were in the most
(07:10):
comfortable accommodationspossible.
And then the networking.
You want to touch on that, Jen?
SPEAKER_02 (07:18):
There's so much networking.
We met tons of people that werein service to the community.
SPEAKER_01 (07:27):
Yes.
SPEAKER_02 (07:28):
Uh it I was just floored because there's so many
different so types of people,those who work with foster kids
and foster parents, those who umempathy for autism in California
is one.
And we've already plugged intoher.
We met some podcasters.
SPEAKER_01 (07:48):
Yeah, we met people who feed the homeless, who some
podcasters that are gonna joinus on the show.
SPEAKER_02 (07:54):
Yes, we've got a couple actually, so that's up
and coming.
Yeah.
So I love the podcast name ofthis duet, and I don't want to
give their names up, but theirpodcast is Talk Early With Me.
SPEAKER_01 (08:11):
Talk Early To Me.
SPEAKER_02 (08:12):
Talk Early To Me.
SPEAKER_01 (08:13):
Yeah, something to that effect.
SPEAKER_02 (08:15):
Yeah, it's about early child development.
SPEAKER_01 (08:17):
Right.
But we're gonna get it all, soyou're not gonna have to guess
on what it is.
SPEAKER_02 (08:21):
Yeah, and then we got invited to other events,
yeah.
Which is so fun, and I can'twait till we get to talk about
the creative creativity in thatspace once we get to that part
of this episode.
SPEAKER_01 (08:33):
And I gotta cover this and then I'll let it go.
Um, it's just wonderful to runinto like-minded individuals.
It's also amazing when you gotadvocates fighting for the same
thing that you're fighting for,for literacy, for safe places,
for kids not to be harmed, forkids not to be abused, for kids
not to be trafficked, for kidsto be able to have a safe home
(08:57):
environment.
And you got all these levels ofpeople working together.
It's not as hopeless as we thinkit is.
So I'm just sending a shout outto the children's conference,
uh, children's networkingconference for being such a huge
advocate for the same type ofwork that we're advocating for.
SPEAKER_02 (09:17):
Yeah.
So here's my last thing beforewe get into the the episode is
when you look at them and we'reall going through budget cuts, a
bit of a crisis in the financialworld right now.
SPEAKER_00 (09:34):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (09:34):
When you come across a non-profit and they've got a
fundraiser and you're able togive, maybe it's not money,
maybe you can volunteer, but itjust really impressed on me what
community means, especially.
I think community actuallybecomes more outstanding when
it's above the financialconstraints, and there's
(09:56):
something that happens when it'sbuilt from um uncertainty, a
little bit of feeling of chaosfor like what's happening here.
SPEAKER_00 (10:06):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (10:06):
So just want to encourage everyone who's doing
the work that um we stand byyou, and your work is not going
in vain.
SPEAKER_01 (10:15):
We're definitely gonna stand by and stand strong.
And and as Jen said, but the onething I did not hear, I didn't
hear anybody complain aboutmoney.
SPEAKER_02 (10:23):
No, not at all.
SPEAKER_01 (10:23):
And hear anybody talk about the budget was short
or they didn't have enoughmoney.
Everyone knew what the work wasabout.
They just buckled in and got itdone.
SPEAKER_02 (10:32):
That's right.
SPEAKER_01 (10:33):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (10:34):
So it's so appropriate that we would talk
about creativity for the lastpart of this series.
What we believe here is thatwhen we honor the creative
spark, whether it be in amarriage, a partnership, working
relationship, friendship,parent-child, that it keeps the
(10:54):
love, the connection, and thegrowth alive.
So we're gonna jump in andexplore it a little bit.
And Corey, if it's okay withyou, let's start with the
parent-child relationship.
SPEAKER_01 (11:04):
Okay.
SPEAKER_02 (11:05):
So, how do you see creativity bridging the
generations between parent andchild?
SPEAKER_01 (11:16):
Um, well, that's it's difficult for me because
I'm not involved in thatrelationship currently, as far
as you know, child parent.
Uh, I do talk to our children,obviously, but it's it's it's
such a different level ofcommunication at this point.
Um I definitely remember what itwas like to be creative with the
(11:41):
kids, and I told them, I gavethem a heads up on what I was
doing.
So they it nothing shocked themor hit them by storm.
Uh, I I did not lie to our kids.
I promised them that I wouldn'tlie to them, and so I tried to
keep that to a hundred percentto just tell them exactly what
it was so that I didn't have todouble back.
(12:02):
And that was one of my mostcreative ways to build a good,
positive, strong relationshipwith them.
And if it was something that Icouldn't talk to them about, I
probably shouldn't have beendoing it.
So I I just didn't even ventureinto that world of what I
shouldn't be doing.
I just told them like it was.
SPEAKER_02 (12:21):
Yeah, I really love that, and I'm gonna bring up
some things that I feel aregonna be pretty nostalgic.
So when I think of us as parentsto our children, I remember
things like you playing Bratzdolls with Kayla and making up a
whole story and actually gettingin her room, having the dolls in
(12:46):
your hands, and they're havingdialogue.
And I just thought that wasreally special, right?
SPEAKER_01 (12:52):
Um, I remember that.
That was that was pretty cool.
SPEAKER_02 (12:55):
Yeah.
And then we would have creativefun with the kids in the
neighborhood.
SPEAKER_00 (13:01):
Yeah, right.
SPEAKER_02 (13:02):
We had dance-offs, um, they had little parties in
the backyard, and then Kaylawould have her friends over and
they'd build like blanket forts,and we might have been a part of
that or just like checked in onthem.
SPEAKER_01 (13:16):
Definitely was a part of it, definitely helped
build the the structures of theforts, and and I just remember
knowing that I needed to bepresent a hundred percent, no
matter what.
I also knew that I I wasn't okaywith kids outside playing by
themselves and strange thingshappening, uh awkward kissing
(13:40):
moments or awkward likingmoments, awkward touching
moments.
I wasn't having it.
I just was like, if I'm there,it won't happen.
So I'm always gonna be there.
Right.
To the point to it was a littlebit of a detriment because kids
was knocking on the door askingme, Can I come out and play?
And I'm like, uh, our kids areout of town, so no, I will not
(14:00):
be coming out to play with you.
SPEAKER_02 (14:02):
Right.
Yeah, that was super fun.
And I think that also expandedinto us working with youth.
So our kids were in the youthgroup and talk about creativity.
Um, I think it was important forkids to see adults being
playful, imaginative, andcurious.
(14:23):
So during that time, Corey, youwrote a play called Circus
Bazaar.
We were doing dancing, we werehaving the kids play
instruments, getting them behindthe microphone to sing.
They were doing video ads forchurch announcements.
It was unbelievable the level ofcreativity, and it just kept
(14:45):
giving.
And what I loved about it isthat those activities made these
kids feel uniquely seen.
SPEAKER_00 (14:55):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (14:56):
Right.
So we brought out their gifts.
And so the question I would askany parent who's listening right
now is what story, song, oractivity would make your child
feel uniquely seen by you today?
Let's say it's a bedtime storyand they like to do voices or
they like to sing, incorporatethat in there, right?
(15:17):
Or just creating an everydaytask and turning it into
creative bond moment, bondingmoment.
Cooking is perfect.
SPEAKER_00 (15:24):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (15:25):
Cooking, just being in that kitchen and creating
something new together,phenomenal stuff.
All right.
Um, oh yeah, I'm gonna put aplug in here because that's why
I love the fuzzy furry forestbooks, because parents,
guardians, you can make the mostfun with these books by giving
(15:47):
the characters um your voice andjust having fun with the
dialogue.
SPEAKER_01 (15:54):
Not only your voice, but your energy as well.
Yeah, and that's where the truecreativity comes in, is when you
lend that energy into whatyou're trying to accomplish with
your own your own child or yourown uh children in the setting
where you're reading the book.
SPEAKER_02 (16:12):
Yes, absolutely.
So let's talk really quick aboutcreativity and friendship, and
we're gonna mix this in withfamily.
Um creativity.
I have friends who are out ofstate, and we don't even stay
connected on a phone call.
It's through every other way.
But it's how sometimes you canstay connected across distance,
(16:35):
time, and life seasons, right?
And even your friends that youget to see all the time.
So when I think about this,Corey, because you know, this is
my favorite, one of my favoritethings to do, is you send a
funny birthday voice memo, oryou do something different for
their birthday, or you start atradition that's just for you
(16:57):
two.
So for example, I have a reallygood friend, and our tradition
now is when we do birthdaysamongst each other, we use the
same bag, right?
And I've I have this otherfriend with her friend, they
have a Snapchat going on forthousands and thousands of days
now.
SPEAKER_01 (17:16):
I so I'm gonna back up just a little bit.
I did not know that.
So say more about the bag thingbecause that's pretty
interesting.
It's like the sisterhood of thetraveling pants, but it's the
birthday bag of travelingbirthdays.
SPEAKER_02 (17:30):
So when it's her birthday, I gift her and it's in
that bag.
She holds on to it when it's mybirthday.
I know it's coming in that bag.
SPEAKER_01 (17:37):
That's pretty nice.
I like that.
SPEAKER_02 (17:39):
And we and we take really good care of that bag.
SPEAKER_01 (17:41):
I bet.
SPEAKER_02 (17:43):
Um, yeah, I just think that is creative.
Yeah, that's really cool.
Can you think of anything thatyou might have done in a
friendship or in family thatbrings creativity?
SPEAKER_01 (17:54):
To that level, no, but uh, I mean, that's pretty
cool.
I'm sitting here thinking, like,man, I've I don't think I've
ever done anything like that.
Oh no.
SPEAKER_02 (18:03):
I I I think it's great that you have a family
chat and that you just like dothese rando texts in there.
SPEAKER_01 (18:12):
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Um, well, I mean, I kind ofthink I and tell me if I'm
wrong.
I I think that most families,uh, and not the entire family,
but the you know, parts of thefamily, cousins or uncles, uh,
you know, brothers and sistersor whatever, have some kind of
chat.
And what's fun for me is just todo a random check-in.
(18:34):
Like, yeah, just hey um happyFriday.
Just checking in with thefamily.
Hope everyone's doing good, havea great weekend.
And then everybody chimes in,and it's just it's great because
you get to hear or not not hearphysically, but hear everyone
check in.
So it's great.
SPEAKER_02 (18:53):
Yeah, that's that's beautiful.
Last but not least, speaking ofrandom creativity means you're
creating a new way of being.
So we've talked about on thepodcast where you and I, Corey,
went to Arizona for yourcousin's birthday.
We have a lot of family, and ifwe were to do that for
(19:15):
everybody, that would beintense.
But this was a special birthday,right?
She's turning 60.
SPEAKER_01 (19:21):
Turning turning 60, and um, excuse me.
And we hadn't seen her in a verylong time.
I hadn't actually saw her inprobably 10-15 years, and this
was my dad's sister's child, andand probably shouldn't let that
(19:41):
kind of time go by withoutseeing your first cousin like
that.
SPEAKER_02 (19:45):
Yeah, yeah.
So, yeah, let's welcomecreativity in that space and get
out of the mundane and bringsome joy in into there and some
surprises that always somethingnew in time.
Yes, all right.
So, let's go uh creativity inmarriage.
SPEAKER_01 (20:05):
Okay, now we're in my lane.
All right, I can speak a littlebit more free.
Go ahead, give me the question.
SPEAKER_02 (20:11):
Okay, just right there.
Um we know that in marriagethings can fall into a routine,
right?
So, what have you done that'screatively reawakened our spark?
Mmm, yes, I like that that's thequestion, though.
(20:35):
Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_01 (20:37):
I didn't know that was an actual question.
No, I'm playing.
I knew that was a question.
SPEAKER_02 (20:42):
Okay.
SPEAKER_01 (20:43):
No, I just try to keep it different and keep it
um, I try to stay on my toes.
That way I'm keeping you on yourtoes, and then I think you're
doing the same thing.
So it's not the same oldrestaurant, it's not the same
old uh places to to go andthings to do.
Where anybody that knows usknows we love Disney, and so
(21:05):
we're always going there.
So we just try to sprinkle alittle bit of special, special
sauce on it to do something alittle bit different every once
in a while.
SPEAKER_02 (21:13):
Yeah, I think our biggest creative moment was
writing the books together,right?
Because the first two were you.
SPEAKER_01 (21:22):
Say more.
SPEAKER_02 (21:22):
I got to play in that with you, but the third,
and then books going forward,Corey's like, let's write it
together.
And that was another level ofcreativity because it's putting
both writing styles together,coming as one on a storyline.
That's been really fun.
SPEAKER_01 (21:43):
Um, can I can I speak to that a little bit?
SPEAKER_02 (21:46):
Please do.
SPEAKER_01 (21:47):
Um, I I honestly felt like the first two books
were really well-written books,but I felt honestly like that
third book was so much moreelevated, so much more
descriptive, and it gave afullness of the characters and
what was going on, and so we wecarried that mantra into the
(22:11):
fourth book as well, and so I'mjust really excited about that
creativity that I was lacking,and I'm not you know too proud
to say, hey, there was more tobe added to this.
SPEAKER_02 (22:25):
Thanks, Puna.
SPEAKER_01 (22:26):
Absolutely.
SPEAKER_02 (22:28):
So during creativity too, and I think the reason why
it's so important in a marriage,in a partnership, is because
there's a willingness to evolveand bring some new things.
So I we're gonna share a moment.
We were talking about thechildren's network conference
(22:49):
that just happened this pastweek.
And I'm going to talk about twowords that totally can exist in
the same space.
And actually, when there'schaos, creativity I feel gets
elevated.
Um so I was stuck on atechnicality.
(23:13):
Here's my type A, my type Apersonality, the left side of my
brain.
I got stuck on an invoice, and Iwas so convinced that the math
was wrong.
And I was convinced on a pricethat it should have been, and I
got stuck.
And when you get stuck, you'renot paying attention to the
(23:35):
opportunities that are in frontof you, just all the different
ways to be creative because Ifeel I feel that being stuck
actually opposes creativity, andso it felt chaotic.
And in so many words, you toldme this feels chaotic right
(23:55):
there in the middle of OntarioConvention Center, day two.
Was it day two?
Yeah, it was day two.
Yeah.
And I learned so much from thatmoment, and you said, Jen, we
need to figure this out andreset.
Here's the things that we don'tknow as of yet, and this is
something that we can visitlater.
(24:15):
So it took me a minute to reset.
I'm very aware of that.
And what I loved about that timeis that it worked as a catalyst.
So let me talk a little bit moreto add to the level of chaos.
So there, there's me, day two.
Another part of the chaos is wehad Corey and I had this
(24:38):
wonderful elevator pitch that weput together that we were
confident in.
We had our marketing materialall around us, and it just
wasn't hitting with people.
And it dawned on us that theseare social workers, community
health workers, psychiatrists,therapists, this is the work
that they do.
(24:58):
They teach, they're educators,they have and they shared with
us, we have so much curriculum,we can't even get through it.
So, although they honored andappreciated our work as authors
and as curriculum designers andbeing presenters and musicians
and all that, it just wasn'tclicking.
(25:22):
And so one could say, Oh man,this was a wash, right?
Like, what are we doing here?
And in comes Corey creativespace, what happened then?
SPEAKER_01 (25:33):
Um, I just saw an opportunity to pivot, and I also
saw another opportunity to leaninto what I know we're we are
very creative and good at.
And upon seeing that, it was inreal time, so I didn't have time
to just say, okay, time outeverybody.
Let me go and have thisconversation with Jen real
(25:54):
quick, so she'll know what pagewe're on.
I just started evolving in thatmoment, and then what I realized
was that there was a need, andwe could could provide an answer
to that need, but I needed toanswer it right away.
So uh I began to also applyanother aspect of our gifts and
(26:17):
abilities, which is publicspeaking.
Um, we've both been in thatspace many, many times, having
fun with it because that's whatwe love to do.
We and especially with kids andyouth.
Um, as Jen said earlier, we workwith youth for uh about seven
years together, and then I hadmy own time when I was working
(26:39):
in the non-public school system.
Uh, long story short, or maybeeven a little bit longer, uh, we
just pivot when we get stuck.
We pivot when we get chaos, andthat's when creativity really
starts to breathe.
SPEAKER_02 (26:54):
Yeah, I what I saw was that it just thrived in the
unknown.
Corey and I started thinking,what do we do well that they may
not do well and may beinterested in?
Speaking, music, soundtrack,podcasting, how to write in
(27:17):
journal, how to self-publish,what's that process look like?
So we're real time gettingdeeper into what Genko Sound
Company is gonna do.
Yeah, and it was just excitingbecause I'm listening to you
create the elevator pitch realtime on the workshops, and then
I started being able to see itand then being able to talk
(27:41):
about it, right?
And it totally dismantled thethought process of this is the
way it's always been done, orthis is the way we practice.
So, you know, what do we do?
Well, what you do is you createspace for new thinking, yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (27:56):
You never get stuck in trying to make a uh square
peg go into a round hole.
Yes, you always have to think alittle bit outside of the box.
Now, that's not to say that wealways get it right, and that's
not not to say that we haven'tbeen there with that hammer
trying to force it in, but I'vehad enough train wrecks in my
(28:17):
life to know that this is notworking, I gotta try something
else.
SPEAKER_02 (28:22):
Yes, and I want to give a little sales 101, and
it's something we knew, and it'sinteresting when you know
things, but you don't lean intoit, right?
So creativity reactivatespossibility, and it was
brilliant when we we also sharedout loud.
(28:43):
Let's hear what they do, let'sshare then briefly what we do
and ask them what's thepossibility of us partnering and
coming together?
Yeah, how can you use us?
How can we be of service to you?
SPEAKER_01 (28:59):
And even more so, how can they see us working with
them?
Yes, to bring about a better uhoutcome in what they're doing.
SPEAKER_02 (29:07):
Yeah.
So I think when we limitourselves, it forces us to think
resourcefully because we werelimiting.
We kind of put this ceiling onus, like this is what we do.
But then when we realized wewere limiting, we went outside
of that container and went intoresource mode, right?
(29:28):
Like, okay, this is what we needto do.
Um, I think there was definitelysome groundbreaking ideas during
that time, which was a surprise.
And I feel like um the questionI asked myself is what can we do
with what we already have orwhat we already know?
(29:48):
So there was more direction andguidance by being open to being
creative.
SPEAKER_00 (29:53):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_02 (29:54):
And I could go on and on and on.
SPEAKER_01 (29:58):
And I know we sound like we're Very excited.
It's because we are.
SPEAKER_00 (30:02):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:02):
And it it's it's exciting to be in the moment and
living in the moment opposed tothrowing in the towel and
saying, you know what, I giveup.
This isn't working.
I can't believe we did all thisfor absolutely nothing, and now
everyone says they already haveeverything I need that I have.
SPEAKER_00 (30:23):
Yes.
SPEAKER_01 (30:24):
But that that's not the end of the story.
And you write your story.
SPEAKER_02 (30:29):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (30:29):
It's up to each individual to say, this is
enough, or I have more.
SPEAKER_02 (30:35):
Yeah.
Absolutely.
And something else, too, that Isaw in people all around us in
between the event in Riversideand then in Ontario is we met
talented people, and creativityfor me is less about talent and
more about willingness.
(30:56):
Because you can be talented andnot be willing to create, not be
willing to collaborate, not bewilling to partner, right?
SPEAKER_01 (31:03):
Yeah, and let's address that.
SPEAKER_02 (31:05):
Yeah.
SPEAKER_01 (31:06):
That in itself is a gift to be willing to do that.
To be to have the the kind ofheart to say, I'm willing to
collaborate with you, eventhough I don't know you, even
though I haven't seen what youdo completely.
And that's what a lot of whatwas going on happening in real
(31:28):
time.
And I loved it, not just withus, but with everybody.
And here's another thing (31:31):
there was a lot of trust going on
amongst so many different groupsof people, so many different
walks of life.
And I'm talking about from raceto uh personality to
backgrounds, and you're talkingabout educators with therapists
(31:51):
and social workers and authorsand then entrepreneurs, and
everyone is trusting each otherin this space, having honest
conversation, which is amazing.
So that all that creativity initself was pretty moving.
SPEAKER_02 (32:07):
Absolutely.
So for those who are interestedin writing, and those who might
want to go further and go lookinto self-publishing, Corey and
I are doing workshops.
So those will be announced soon.
But let me start with someprompts that can really help you
(32:27):
in the space of writing based onwhat we've talked about.
So think about these questions,don't overthink them, and then
just write your response, right?
So think about a time when youcreated something beautiful
during a difficult season andwhat it taught you.
So what's something you createdduring a difficult season and
(32:50):
what did it teach you?
Next question, if you wantanother one or that other one
didn't speak to you, is whatdoes my inner voice say when
things feel chaotic?
And how can I lean intocreativity to help me respond
differently?
So using creativity to be aresponse mechanism.
(33:16):
Third, what creative outlethelps me process stress or
uncertainty?
A creative outlet that helps youprocess stress and uncertainty.
I do want to put a PS in here.
Creativity does not necessarilymean art, a book, a you know,
(33:39):
drawing, music.
Creativity means you're bringingsomething forward that's new.
It could be creativity in theway you hold a meeting,
honestly.
Yeah, creativity is also problemsolving, right?
So that is what we're invitingin our relationships is be
creative.
SPEAKER_01 (34:00):
And and even and I'm when I say this, not last and
definitely not least, butthinking outside of the normal
parameters that you're allowingyourself to think as a form of
creativity.
You you've just given yourself afree lane to operate in so that
you can come up with somethingyou've never come up with
(34:22):
before.
SPEAKER_02 (34:22):
Yeah.
Be bold.
I know my creativity is silly.
Be curious, and it creativityisn't perfection.
I think we've established it's awillingness, right?
Um, well, Corey, I love theABCs.
It would definitely take me on ajourney.
I was surprised as to what wecame up with.
(34:45):
Um, I thought it was prettycreative.
SPEAKER_01 (34:48):
I thought I think we had to live a few of those
moments in order to completethis series.
SPEAKER_02 (34:54):
Yeah, agreed.
So, elevators friends, we hopeyou've laughed, cried,
journaled, and grown with usthrough this series.
And now we invite you toactually write your own
alphabet, your own ABCs forrelationships, one intentional
act of creativity at a time,three letters, ABCs.
(35:15):
What would you define asnecessary for relationships to
thrive?
Well, you know us to take theelevator.
We say, look up and let'selevate every day, elevate every
day, elevate every day, elevate,every day.
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