#90 David Vardeman - Servant Leader, Patriot, & VP at Capital Bank - Tales of Leadership

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
You're listening to the Tells the Leadership podcast
.
This podcast is for leaders atany phase on their leadership
journey to become a morepurposeful and accountable
leader what I like to call a pal.
Join me on our journey togethertowards transformational
leadership.

Speaker 2 (00:20):
All right team, welcome back to the Tells the
Leadership podcast.
I am your host, josh McMillian.
I'm an active duty Army officer.
I have over 16 years ofleadership experience and I'm a
leadership coach for both theArmy and then outside the Army,
and I am on a mission to createa better leader what I like to
call a purposeful, accountableleader or a pal and my vision is

(00:41):
to end toxic leadership bypromoting transformational
stories and skills.
And on today's episode I ambringing you one of the best
well-connected men in WashingtonDC, david Farnham.
David is a US patriot, developeda deep understanding of what it

(01:02):
means to serve, sacrifice andhave selfless actions giving to
both the US military, activeduty and the veteran communities
as a whole across the OD.
He has tirelessly worked forthe benefit of those who need it
.
He has had direct access toboth active duty and retired

(01:24):
flag officers at all levels andhe really found a calling in
helping military of allpositions and experience levels.
He has a deep understanding andknowledge base on the multiple
military verticals, allowing himto listen to an individual
regarding of what's trulyimportant to them, rather than

(01:45):
having a personal agenda when itcomes to his leadership and
service.
He specializes in militaryhealth issues, military
occupational transition andmilitary historical preservation
.
Currently, david has reallyzero free time and you're going
to hear that through everythingthat he is doing, but his level

(02:06):
of sacrifice and commitment tothis country is unwavering.
I don't think I've had anyoneon my show that does so much for
so many people, and does itbecause he chooses to, not
because he needs to, because hedoesn't, but he does it because
he wants to make this country abetter place for you and me.

(02:29):
So let's go ahead and let Davidinto the podcast.
David, welcome to the Tales ofLeadership Podcast.
Brother, I'm excited to haveyou on, but how are you doing?

Speaker 3 (02:41):
I'm doing great.
I'm really excited to be hereand I really love your channel,
and all the different guestsyou've had in the past have been
incredibly impressive, and youknow you got my buddy, Robert,
coming on next, so you know Igot to set the stage right and
give a little competition, sowe're going to have a great
conversation.
I look forward to you knowtoday and being with you.

Speaker 2 (03:03):
You know I was thinking about that today.
I was kind of reflecting onthis journey because I've been
podcasting now for almost a yearand three months and just all
the awesome people that I'vegotten the opportunity to talk
to that I would not havenormally had the opportunity to

(03:23):
talk to if I didn't put myselfout in this forum and a lot of
that came through some of theconversations that we've had and
those should have been podcastsby themselves, because we I
think we've had like two hourphone calls yeah, yeah, they've
been great and really, uh, youknow, enlightened in terms of
what our expectations are fortoday, but also you know how we
can have a better impact todayas well.

Speaker 3 (03:40):
So I think they were a great, uh, you know, starting
starting point for both of us.

Speaker 2 (03:44):
I'm going to start off with a quote, because Vice
Admiral Sally O'Hare stated thatyou are the most military
connected individual inWashington DC that she has ever
met and I want to set the stageis like listeners, be ready,
because David does everythingand it's almost to the point of

(04:05):
where I don't know how you'redoing all of that.
It's just one person, but I'mexcited to kind of dig into all
that.
A great place to start is maybejust provide a quick overview
to the listeners of who you are.

Speaker 3 (04:18):
Again.
My name is David Vardaman.
I'm a national commercialbanker.
In terms of my job, I'm helpingthe not-for-profit community
from coast to coast, but duringmy volunteer time I'm totally
dedicated over the last 10 yearsto the US veteran community and
that includes joining differentveteran service organization

(04:40):
boards.
I currently sit on seven ofthem.
I sit on the Association of theUnited States Navy Navy League
of the United States Navy, safeHarbor Foundation, the National
Coast Guard Foundation, warriorsEthos, wounded Paw Project,
international LeadershipFoundation.
I'm on two national task forcesAmerican Legion, small Business

(05:01):
Task Force and the CitizenWarrior Coalition.
It's the reserve organizationand different, all the different
branches of the reserves thatwe support.
So that is a pretty hefty liftright there.
But I also support 40 veteranservice organizations
philanthropically, as well as 10traditional, not for profits
that in different ways tie intothe military community, such as

(05:24):
cancer research et cetera.
So I'm extremely busy in termsof my volunteerism, intertwined
with my national mission, withmy work.
So everything is all together,but it's all very focused on
helping the US veterans, helpingthe active duty, making their
lives better every single day.

Speaker 2 (05:44):
Veterans helping the active duty, making their lives
better every single day.
I love it because it's allconnected and I would love to
kind of take it and it's noteven including what you're doing
or you plan to do in 2024,because you're helping build the
Navy Museum right now, which isa multi-billion dollar project
within DC.
So I truly mean this is that I'mhumbled to have you now as a

(06:04):
connection and, you know,hopefully after this podcast we
continue to grow as a friend,cause I know that I'm going to
be able to learn a lot from youand when I move up to the big
house one day or the Pentagon,I'm probably going to get a
chance to see you, probablypretty frequently.
But it's truly amazing, justall the things you listed, and I

(06:25):
always prep every single one ofmy podcast episodes.
It's usually straightforwardyou know someone you know they
go into a career and they enter,they have a challenge and then
they reinvent themselves andthey do that transition to
whatever the passion is.
They find that passion.
But you, man, are doing so muchand it's truly inspiring and, I

(06:46):
think, a great way to startbecause you work with so many
patriots across all of DODdefining what leadership is to
you, and I'm really curious toohow has that changed with some
of the caliber of leaders thatyou're around every day?

Speaker 3 (07:03):
Yeah, I thank you so much because leadership is very
complex to me and you and Italked for a long time about
this because, you know, puttingit into words is very complex,
so I decided to write it down soyou know, we could, we could
get it and it would be coherent.
And so I'm going to just readwhat I stated in terms of what I
feel leadership is.

(07:23):
Just read what I stated interms of what I feel leadership
is.
Leadership based on my last 10years in the field, helping
everyday active duty and USveterans in need continues to
develop and grow.
Based on multiple verticals.
I am an expert.
My viewpoints of leadership hasto do with being the right
person at the right time, basedon one's skills and experience

(07:45):
to execute the task successfullyin front of them.
But, most important, have theconfidence of those who are
looking to you to lead.
Courage, sacrifice, vision,accountability, character, and
then the execution will defineyou as a leader on each task
throughout one's life.

Speaker 2 (08:06):
You listed so many different types of values
through there and I love that ofhow you kind of started it off
with being the right person atthe right time In leadership.
The more I go down this journeyand General Petraeus, when I had
him on, really highlighted thisfact is that there's not a set

(08:27):
strategy that you can always useto be successful in every job.
It's really tailored towardsthe environment you find
yourself in, the team thatyou're on.
You know where I work withinSoCal.

(08:48):
My leadership style iscompletely different than how I
was when I was a companycommander and I was commanding
250 people, because the level ofmaturity within the
organization.
I can be more of myself andless stoic is a good way of kind
of saying that.
But my core values still holdtrue and I think that that's one
of the critical things withindefining leadership is defining
who you are and how you show up,and you do that, I think, by

(09:13):
those core values, the thingsthat you just stated and listed
out, because those ring truethroughout your entire journey.
How you show up is differentand that is really hard to
describe.

Speaker 3 (09:23):
You could do a cookie cutter version of what is
leadership, look it up in thedictionary and say it and move
on with the conversation.
It's much more difficult to saywhat are the aspects that you're
going to need for the rest ofyour life to be an effective
leader.
And again, the courage,sacrifice, vision,
accountability, character isexactly what you were talking
about in terms of yourtransition from a 250 to what

(09:45):
you're doing now.
And one of the really greataspects is your life will change
dramatically pretty much everyseven years.
You're going to be sort of adifferent person every seven
years, or it's going to be sixyears too, right, but you're
going to have different tasksand different responsibilities
and through that maturity,you're going to have different
leadership challenges that aregoing to face you, and whether

(10:07):
or not you can live up to thatand execute is going to be based
on your core values.
Like you said and that isreally what I've learned over
the last decades of service andworking is that you will change.
Your responsibilities are goingto change.
Recently, we had a death of oneof the executive directors and

(10:27):
then one of the not-for-profitsI listed.
I never in my life thought I wasgoing to have to take over a
not-for-profit because I'mhandling the finances and take
care and sort of run the thing.
But I had to take on theleadership role based on my
experience and based on thecharacter of the need.
And if I didn't do it, who elsewas going to do it?
So it isn't a lifetimecommitment, but it is something

(10:48):
that I had to execute at themoment and that was on top of
everything else I'm doing right,but it just had to be done.
So somebody has to step up andlead and take care of
transactions, based on yourskillset and based on your
capability to execute and thenallowing people to allow you to
do that leadership.
It will bring it all togetherinto a really nice experience.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
I think one of the critical characteristics that
defines I always call a pal or apurposeful, accountable leader,
and to me that is someone wholeads with transformational
leadership styles and is aservant leader transformational
leadership styles and as aservant leader but one of the
key characteristics that I'vekind of always noticed within
leaders is that ability to beunreasonable or bold and, like

(11:32):
what you just said, is that youstood up in a time of turbulence
of where most people probablywould not have raised their
right hand to kind of fill thatrole, but you understood that
your skill set, you're the rightperson for the right time to
fill that void.
That's awesome connection it'saccountability.

Speaker 3 (11:49):
Like I, I knew I could handle the accountability
of the task and it's soimportant the leader to to do
those tasks that do fit intoyour skill set and not try to do
something and try to be the allgreat leader of you know and
handle everything, becausedifferent people have different
skill sets that far that youshould be a follower and not
necessarily the leader at alldifferent transactions that you

(12:12):
know need to be done.
So I do not jump in on everysingle thing, but this was when
I felt like I needed theaccountability and the group
needed the protection and Ineeded to do it.
So sometimes you do need totake a step, but then you take a
step back when you're no longerneeded, and that's part of
leadership as well I have aconcept.

Speaker 2 (12:32):
We haven't even got any questions up so far.
Right, I call it the rule ofsledgehammer, um, and as a
leader, being a sledgehammer,and?
But you're not always applyingthat type of mentality, you only
apply that?
mentality when you need to,because you'd still need to hold
your team accountable.
But when they get to a certainpoint of where they're stretched
beyond their capacity, that'swhen the leader steps in and

(12:54):
they have a sledgehammermentality.
They break through thatobstacle or whatever mental
barrier the team's in and thenthey hold their team accountable
.
All right, figure out a systemor a process that will not allow
that to happen again and givethe ball back to their court.
You, kind of like, just slowlysink away back into the shadows.

Speaker 3 (13:14):
And what you're saying is great, because that
applies to both the civilianleadership as well as military.
It is really.
You know some great stuff andyou know I think that's what I
was doing on this particular but.
But you know we've learned thatyou have to do that all
throughout the differenttransactions that you may be
leading, whereas push, pull backand make sure that people are

(13:34):
still with you through the wholeprocess, because you don't want
to alienate somebody you knowduring the process and lose
their insight just becauseyou're pushing everything
forward, right?
So I try to.
I try to balance and be softand, you know, and tough all at
the same time with witheverybody I deal with.

(13:54):
I do make mistakes, and sothat's being a real leader, I
think, is not only allowingmistakes, but also making them
yourselves, because how are yousupposed to grow with more
mistakes, right?
so I made all the mistakes inthe world, and so I think that I
think that um, in terms of themilitary and how that ties into
the military is I was like wewere discussing back in you know

(14:16):
the 2014 13 15 range, when theywhen, when it was open with the
us army and the navy weretalking about allowing their
people to make mistakes but notholding them to an
accountability where it ruinstheir career or ruins their
esteem.
And so I think that we need tosort of get back to those
conversations with the militaryand how we're treating people as

(14:39):
they come through in their 20s.
You know, everybody in their20s mess up, right, and
everybody in their 30s havetheir moments, right, so their
leadership moments when theywant to be a little bit more
aggressive, right.
So I think that we, as leaders,and also the flag officers all
the way down to the you know,the colonel level and major

(15:00):
level, we all have to like thinkabout, you know, how do we want
to discipline?
How do we want to discipline,how do we want to bring these
young people up in a way that wedo not knock themselves down to
the point where they becomeunconfident or that second guess
their good intentions and gooddecisions.

Speaker 2 (15:19):
There was one organization that I worked for
and it was a hands down one ofthe best jobs that I've ever had
in the Army.
And I say that because the Armygave me keys to a Humvee and I
had no one supervising me and Iwas in Fort Polk, louisiana.
It's been right now, but we'lljust say that there may or may
not been some mudding.
That happened in Fort Polk,right.

(15:40):
That was such a beautifulexample when we were talking on
the phone of failing and thenunderstanding that the
importance of failing and me nowhaving a master's degree in
engineering, I see even more ofa correlation.
Is that what is engineering ifit is not to fail, fail small

(16:01):
and fail quickly, so then youcan identify the problem,
isolate it and improve and grow.
And what the Army does, or atleast you know.
When I was in the operationalside, especially at those CTC
rotations, they did a reallygood job of stretching a brigade
combat team to the point offailure because they wanted to

(16:21):
take you to the point where youwere going to fail.
You know, mentally, physically,logistically, so you could
identify those issues, thosepain points of where hey, this
is why you failed.
So when you go, actually deploy, if you were going to Iraq or
Syria or wherever, you would notexperience that same type of

(16:41):
negative event when it actuallymattered.
And we would do a really goodjob of capturing those lessons
learned all the way at theplatoon to a brigade, after
action review and capturingthose feedbacks.
But I think what you just saidis that leaders nowadays at
least what I've seen is they'reafraid to give the authority to

(17:05):
their subordinate leaders tomake those types of decisions
because they kind of want tohoard them, and I see that a lot
within that.
The acquisition field is thatyou know, the bureaucracy that
we live in gives leaders atremendous amount of power and
when you have that power it'svery hard to give it away.
But to be an effective leaderyou have to be able to do that

(17:28):
and with that there's going tobe failure and there's going to
be a lot of it.
But as long as you don'tviolate a core value of your
organization, of what you'retrying to build within the
culture and the climate, I thinkit's it's it's OK to allow that
individual to fail because atthe end of the day they're being
fortified through fire, they'regoing to come out stronger,

(17:50):
they're going to become a betterindividual and you're grooming
the future leaders in yourorganization.

Speaker 3 (17:55):
What are you saying?
You're saying that they'retraining.
You trained before you went.
There were seeds and so youwere prepared and you had the
failure here.
That's the same in all thedifferent elements, correct?
So why not push them?
Why not allow them to fail andlearn and grow and develop as an
individual, Because these arethe future leaders of our nation

(18:15):
, and if we do not allow them tounderstand that they not only
have to learn through trial anderror, but the people coming
after them have to learn throughtrial and error.
So how are we going to build areally strong culture when we're
not allowing people to embracetheir own potential and also
push their own potential?
So I think this is exciting ifwe can get the thought process

(18:39):
back to where we were five orsix or seven years ago, when we
were really pushing that elementof allowing people to grow and
develop and fail and continue tomove and forge forward.
And so that is sort of an offtopic of leadership.
But something very important towhat we're doing is not only in

(19:02):
the civilian world, but also inthe in terms of the mentor
civilian world, as well aswhat's going on in the military.

Speaker 2 (19:08):
So I think as well.
I was just saying this is why Ilove talking to you, because,
like, we haven't literallygotten to any of the questions
that I've written down, butevery time I talk to you you
fire me up because we share thesame passion.
And yesterday I took a test theresiliency-based leadership
program.
I got certified on that lastnight.

(19:29):
It's a four-hour exam, yeah,and the dude at the end is like
how do you feel?
He's like I feel fired upbecause we're talking about
stuff that I love.
So I'm going to shut up so wedon't derail the conversation,
but I would love to kind of getinto.
You know where your leadershipjourney started, starting off at

(19:50):
James Madison university.
You graduate through there andthen you enter the banking field
, and I think you started offwith like 54 employees is when
you first entered in the banking.

Speaker 3 (20:00):
When I entered banking and you know, I did it
because I had to get healthinsurance and then, you know, I
did it because I had to gethealth insurance and then, you
know, things just progressedvery quickly and then I ended up
, you know, leading and growingas an individual national banker
and leading the nation andcommercial banking and different
in a different company that Iwas working for at that time.

(20:23):
So I really became extremelygood at what I did, you know,
during my independent sales.
It's a sort of an independentsales national commercial

(20:44):
banking relationship managertype job.
And so then I went to.
Capitol Hill and then I startedmanaging lots of different
people in terms of starting aprivate banking initiative.
And then, when I was on CapitolHill, I worked with Muhammad
Yunus and others on microlending.
The only reason I bring that upis, you know, there could be a

(21:05):
government shutdown coming up.
Yeah, we started themicrolending program for the
capitol police and the architectof the capitol.
So I was really involved withyou know how do I help people
and that really brought mypatriotism back.
You know, because I grew up asa navy, with a navy family, and
it was very, very patri, verypatriotic.
And you know, then I got onCapitol Hill and I actually

(21:26):
started wearing my American flagthat you see over here on my
lapel, because I wanted peoplewhen they came to Washington DC
and came to the Capitol, theywould see that people are
patriotic and, you know, reallyloving their country, and so
that started it all back andthen sort of the rest is history
when I left because then Ijoined a private business bank

(21:47):
and I began my work with theWounded Lawyers and with Navy
Safe Harbor and it just sort ofsnowballed from there to what it
is today.
And so it's 10 years of a lotof hard work.
It's 10 years of reallydedicated day-to-day, you know,
face-to-face interaction withveterans and senior leadership

(22:07):
of the Army, navy, air Force,marine, coast Guard, all the way
down, you know, with theAmerican Legion, down with the,
you know, infantry, and so it'sreally encompassed the entire
military community.
There is not one branch I donot help more than the other
branches.
There is not one branch I donot help more than the other

(22:42):
branches and I'm very, verydedicated to making people's
lives better and I did thatthrough a lot of hard work,
trial esteems of both a soldieror a sailor and or young people
coming up in all of life, butlet's just focus in on the
sailors and the soldiers thethree critical elements of
esteem I decided I had to tackleand that was personal spiritual

(23:04):
esteem, occupational esteem andphysical fitness esteem I
decided I had to tackle and thatwas personal spiritual esteem,
occupational esteem and physicalfitness esteem.
And so by focusing in on thosethree esteems in terms of what I
wanted to accomplish, I wasable to build a network of 40 to
45 veteran serviceorganizations that sort of
encompass one of those valuesand they encompass them in all
different ways, encompass one ofthose values and they encompass

(23:26):
it in all different ways.
And it allowed me a reallystrong focus of what am I doing,
why am I doing it and how am Ileading, you know, to help as
many people as I possibly can.
And it really has blossomedinto something extremely special
and once in a lifetime I canhonestly say that I'm the top
national banker in militaryaffairs in the nation.
I can say that with all dueconfidence because I don't know

(23:50):
how to be close to what I'mdoing, but it's very strategic
and it's very smart and it's alltied into a leadership concept
of how do you be one person andimpact as many people as humanly
possible.
And I can dive deeper into thatif you have questions regarding
those esteems and what I'mreally an expert on at this time

(24:12):
.

Speaker 2 (24:14):
Yeah, I know, when we were talking before is that
something very similar that Ihave about, you know, having
fulfillment in life between work, work, family, self I I joked
with you before is that I'm justa simple infantryman and I keep
everything.
Kiss, keep it simple, stupid,right is that to me?

(24:34):
Anyone that you know that Iwork with, and especially with
me, you have to be able to havea harmonious life between work
of what, uh what occupationalfamily, which I think falls
within that personal space andthen spiritual and then and self
um, which which is you, youknow right, like you have to be

(24:54):
able to to serve yourself.
And when I was always in thezone or switched on, I had a
healthy balance between allthose.
It wasn't perfectly balanced,because life is never balanced
in that way and it's alwaysseasons of life.
Maybe our occupational is goingto require more time, maybe our
spiritual is going to requiremore time because we're going

(25:16):
through a challenging situationand we need to turn to Christ,
or maybe someone else needs helpand we have to be able to do
that.
But walk me through.
How did you develop those threepillars, that framework?

Speaker 3 (25:30):
I think I was seeing what was struggling with that on
a day-to-day basis and ofcourse you have the elephant in
the room is the suicideprevention.
I specialized in that for fiveyears and that's sort of how I
sort of encompassed these threebecause I saw, after those five
years of really digging deep andtrying to do my very best to
help people, I found that I haveto help all the other

(25:54):
organizations and groups to helpthem in order to get a
maximized effort out there withdifferent ideas and different
techniques in order to help USveterans in active duty have a
better, healthy day-to-day life.
Okay.
So then I said, okay, what isone of the big stressors that we
all go through through life,from 20, whatever 18 to maybe 65

(26:20):
, and that's occupational andesteem.
You know, do you feel goodabout your job?
And then I was thinking, whenthe people are transitioning out
, are they having a goodexperience?
And I found out that you knoweight out of nine veterans that
leave only last in their firstjob for nine months.
Right, yeah.
Well, instead of, you know, justpreaching it, I actually

(26:42):
engaged in practicing.
You know, just preaching it, Iactually engaged in practicing.
I joined Warriors Ethos, whichis a military transition group
that is run by Jared Shepard andGeneral Clark and Medal of of a

(27:04):
US veteran transitioning intothe workforce.
And how do I make their journeybetter and how do I make it
more comfortable in terms oftheir transition?
And am I there?
What's even more important, amI there after the nine months?
Okay, Because that's when thetrouble begins on suicide
prevention, okay, they're allhappy, they got their first job,

(27:24):
okay, but then they find thatthat isn't the right fit, that
isn't the spiritual fit, thatisn't giving them the physical
fitness ability that they'relooking for, correct, so they
become out of balance, and so wehave to be there for them when
they become out of balance, toget them back on the track where
they're more comfortable interms of what they want to do
with their life, because Iguarantee you they're more

(27:49):
focused nine months after thanthey are, right, when they get
out.
And one thing I do want to sayis I deal with flag officers
from four stars all the way downto infantry, and everybody's
anxiety is consistent.
I talk to four stars that areabout to get out who say the
same stick as an infantry guyabout to get out.
You know, maybe the infantryguy is a little bit more anxious

(28:10):
about getting that first jobbut their anxiety levels,
everything about their purpose,everything about their
contribution to the nation isall very similar and we have to
be much more in tune with thatand be able to really be patient
with them and be really focusedon helping them during that
time.
So I think that explains sortof why I got into the

(28:32):
occupational esteem issue.
I do help groups like Boots toBooks out in California.
I'm interested in a lot ofdifferent organizations
throughout the nation, hiringOur Heroes with Admiral Adam
Rock.
You know there are differentpeople that I want to help, but
so I'm very in tune with thiswhole issue and how the

(28:52):
different programs are going.
I do believe in all thedifferent programs and they all
sort of serve a differentpurpose, which I think is really
fascinating, and how we get thebest practices of all of them
is something I need to work onin the future, but right now I'm
just focused on making adifference in occupational

(29:13):
transition and this will helpsave lives.
Somebody who has a purpose,somebody who is in tune with
what they want to do with therest of their life, will really
help guide them to the spiritualsoftness that will help them
you know, help them with some oftheir negative feelings.
I can get more into that wholeother issue because that's a

(29:35):
very deep one, but but these arethe things that I'm doing to
try to help veterans on theoccupational side.
On the physical fitness side, Ijoin energies with groups like
Warriors Rising and also Catch aLiftoff.
These different groups giveveterans an opportunity to

(29:59):
regain their health and physicalfitness through different
programs that bring them up interms of it's always better.
Don't you feel better whenyou're working out and you're
not overweight?
I mean, I do like I'm dying, tostart 100%.

Speaker 2 (30:15):
I'm like a diva those snicker commercials.
If I don't work out in a day Ijust I get sassy.
That's the best way to defineit.

Speaker 3 (30:22):
And then you know, for me, I've been working so
hard on this veteran state.
I think I've been like doingand going to these dinners and
drinking and eating.

Speaker 2 (30:29):
You know, you blow my mind every day on linkedin, you
post this amazing picture of anamazing event gala that you're
always attending.
I'm like I think david is themost interesting man in the
world, like those commercials.
It's like that's you.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
It's like it, it it's been a very wonderful, intense,
you know, like heavy weightgaining last two weeks, and so
you know I'm also in tune with.
You know I have to bephysically.
You know you have to practice.
I have to be on point with myoccupation.
I have to be physically fit andthen I also have to work on

(31:07):
spirituality and thespirituality elements.
And then I also have to work onspirituality and the
spirituality elements.
I deal with taps and I, youknow, in terms of the Gold Star
Bereavement programs throughoutthe nation and I try to build

(31:27):
people up through Navy SafeHarbor Foundation and the
Warrior Games and making peoplewho are injured feel better
about themselves and community.
So there's all sorts ofdifferent spiritual and I also
have become extremelyexperienced spiritually because
of this experience, because I'vehad all sorts of wonderful
interventions, you know, interms of my experience in
helping people and where thathas led, and it's only made me
super strong spiritually becausethere's no question in my mind

(31:49):
that we're being watched andthat our actions are being
changed.
So I think, um, I think thatreally is inspiring in itself.
So, you know, believe in the um.
We believe in the spiritual,occupational, physical.
If you try it, as, as you knowyourself, you're going to find
out how hard it is to reallybalance all three and we have to

(32:09):
put that in perspective withsomebody who is out of balance
and what they're going through,and be empathetic and engage,
and that is what I've been doingthe last 10 years in terms of
trying to create programs andsupport all these different, 40
different VSS in order to make areally powerful, impactful

(32:30):
difference for as many lives asI humanly possibly can.

Speaker 2 (32:34):
I think that's one of the most impactful missions
that you're currently on is thesuicide prevention within the US
military, because that issomething that is near and dear
to my heart, because I've hadmore friends that I can count
that have committed suicide,because I've had more friends
that I can count that havecommitted suicide.
And it always is through thosetransition points, and it's just
the same in the battlefield.

(32:55):
What is the most dangerous timein a combat operation is those
transition points when you'reentering or you're exiting or
you're transitioning fromoffensive to defensive
operations.
That's when darkness can creepin, that's when the enemy gets a
vote, because that's whenyou're most vulnerable.

(33:16):
And we need more people like youthat are willing to use the
resources that they have forgood and help save lives and to,
kind of, you know, shape thiseven more powerful.
How many soldiers and don'tdon't take this as a quote,
cause this probably isn't spoton, but it's pretty close Did we
lose in Iraqq and afghanistan?
You know the 20 plus years?
Yeah, like between six to seventhousand.

(33:37):
Now do the math and I'm sureyou're a banker, so you probably
do the public math on this one22 veterans a day for that 20
plus years committed suicidethat's over 160 160,000 soldiers
that could have been maybe notall of them we could have helped
, but a good portion of thosecan.

(33:58):
That's what I do.
What I do is because I believethat if I can help show leaders
a better way to lead, with aservant leadership style that
uses meekness as the powerwithin leadership and you don't
always have to be an alpha, thenmaybe that can touch someone's
life and save someone's life,because everything rises and

(34:21):
falls on leadership.
I love how you talked aboutthat is that you had to learn to
lead yourself with thisframework practice what you
preach before you go, start totalk to other people, because
that is absolutely essential,because you show up
authentically and if you weren'tpracticing what you're
preaching and you weren't givingthat type of advice or guidance
, people would see through that.

(34:41):
They would see that you weren'tyour authentic self.
So I love that.

Speaker 3 (34:47):
I love everything you're doing with that
Everything I'm doing is totallyauthentic, because what am I
gaining?
I'm not gaining financialwealth.
It's all about doing and beinga patriot to the United States.
That's what it's all about.
I mean, we live in the bestcountry in the world.
We have to.
We shouldn't be going through22 a day, right?
So we have to think about.

(35:08):
And there was a very famous man.
He asked me what was the numberone best practice?
There is no one number one bestpractice.

Speaker 2 (35:16):
No, there's not.

Speaker 3 (35:17):
Every individual is so unique and this is not
something I wanted to learn.
Okay, you know, when you'rediving into the topic, you want
to save lives, you want to stopit right, but every soul is so
unique that it's very difficultto identify.
I'm on Navy Safe HarborFoundation Board.

(35:39):
We recognize the number onewounded warrior out of the
10,000 throughout our nation andone of them suffered with PTSD.
But they were put at the verypinnacle of the United States
Navy.
You know that person, tragically, and I was always worried about
that person because they wereput at the very pinnacle of the
United States Navy.
That person, tragically, and Iwas always worried about that
person because they were overemotional and I was like, why
are you hugging everybody?
It was just sort of strange andI was like I was a little

(36:01):
worried about him and he didcommit suicide two years later
and he was the pinnacle.
Ok, he was the person that weall said was the very, you know,
the fine recovery, OK, so, soit's very hard to like pinpoint
and say this person's healthy,this person is not.
What we can do is create betterenvironment and better programs

(36:23):
that make it easier or or bringpurpose or commodity.
You know when you're alltogether you know, bring the
camaraderie the camaraderie.
Thank you, I was just bringingeverybody together, you know, in
a common good, and I thinkwe're getting there and I think
we're doing better.
And one thing I do want to, youknow, state with regards to

(36:45):
suicide with women.
Right, women's numbers weregoing up and up and up and the
reason was not because they werein combat, right, the reasons
was the PTSD in their childhoodwas being triggered by events
that were taking place in theirworkplaces, in the military.
Okay, so there were flashbacksand bad elements.
So how do you identify that?

(37:05):
And how do you identify that inthe military, right?
So I think this issue is somuch more complex and so much
more difficult and so much morechallenging for individuals
getting involved in it.
Saying I want to make adifference, right, in all
intentions, right, I thinksometimes we have to really

(37:26):
think about how we can impact.
That impact may be helping TAPS, it may be helping Headstrong,
it might be helping some othergroup that is researching also
the fight-flight syndrome, whichis being studied right now in
intense that, you know, gettingbetter research on that.
So we can maybe detox peoplewhen they come out of the

(37:48):
military in order to protectthem in terms of their own harm
to themselves.
So all of these things,intertwined, need to be done
more effectively.
Now that we know so much more,does that make sense?
That is a toffee right there,what I just said.
That is a really difficultthing for us to pull together
and be able to execute.
But the time is over for youknow, like you know people doing

(38:12):
push-ups 2,200 a day or.
The time for that is over.
The time for action and timefor us to engage with the
education that we've learnedover the last 10 years needs to
begin, and so I challenge, Ichallenge the VA and other you
know, people of power that youknow.
If you want to make adifference, we have a lot of

(38:33):
great programs and research, andhow do you identify an
individual In the Headstrong ata national gallery?
A guy threw himself off thebuilding and somehow survived,
and they put these guys up onstage and say why did you commit
suicide?
But he said the said the better.
The world would be better offif I'm not here, and that has

(38:54):
always stuck in my head.
You know in terms of wheresomebody's mind is, you know
when, when they do the ultimatedeed, and and can we touch more
of those people because heregrets doing what he did.
So if people regret, you knowafterwards what he did.
I've never heard somebody say Iwish you know I'm happy with
what I did and if they could seethe impact it has on the

(39:16):
families, like I can't even tellyou all the debridement
programs I've started to helpthe family members of the
suicide because they'redevastated.
Okay, so I think that's wherewe have to have better education
in lines, even underneatheverything you know somehow.
I think you know the Coast Guardwith their mental resilience
program.
Mental resilience is code forsuicide prevention, but they try

(39:42):
.
They're doing wonderful workwith the chaplains and trying to
get you know at least thestigma of discussion lowered,
and so they're probably the bestgroup that I've seen in the
different verticals engagedright now in trying to address
the issue.
But it's still complex and I'vejust gone on and talked about
it for a while because I've beenworking on it for 10 years.

(40:04):
But don't underestimate, if youwant to get involved in this
topic, if you want to reallymake a difference in this topic,
how much you have to learn inorder to have your skill set and
your talents put in the rightplace within this extremely
complex, but we do.

(40:24):
I totally believe we have tobring this 22 number down
because it has not changed onebit since I started 10 years on
the process.
So obviously maybe I'm doingsomething wrong or maybe
obviously the nation has to dosomething better, but it's very,
very complex.

Speaker 2 (40:44):
All right, team, let's take a quick break from
this podcast and I want topersonally invite you to our
private Facebook community thatI call Purposeful Accountable
Leaders, or PALS, and PALS is acommunity dedicated to inspiring
and developing servant leadersby sharing transformational
stories and skills Exactly whattells the leadership is all
about.
My goal is to build a communityof like-minded leaders that can

(41:08):
share lessons learned, askquestions and celebrate wins
when it happens.
And my mission in life is clearI will end toxic leadership by
sharing transformational storiesand skills, and you will find
countless transformationalleaders in this group, many of
them I have had the honor toserve with in the military.
If you want to find a communitythat can help you grow both

(41:30):
personally and professionally,we would love to have you.
You can simply searchPurposeful Accountable Leaders
on Facebook or click theLeadership Resources tab in the
show notes to join.
I am looking forward to seeingyou guys and continuing to grow
together on our leadershipjourney.
Back to the podcast.
Well, I think you hit the nailon the head is that everyone

(41:51):
uses these, I think, for selfishpurposes, like when the ice
bucket challenge came out forALMS, right Like, everyone was
on social media and they weredoing all these ice bucket
challenges and the pushup doing22 a day, but you lose the true
purpose of it is that you'rechallenging someone to do
something and then they'relooking at it from a more

(42:13):
selfish lens, um, in terms oflike the social media following
the dopamine clicks that we'regoing to get for the likes that
we're going to put in there.
But people have times, theyhave talents and they have
treasures.
We all have those.
How can we leverage our time,our talents and our treasures to
actually make a difference?
And to hit your note, what youjust said is there are so many

(42:34):
resources out there and ways toactually put resources in
people's hands that are in thatdark space, but we're focused
more on promoting just a concept22 pushups a day to bring
awareness.
Okay, we've got awareness, bro.
What are you doing?

Speaker 3 (42:53):
I think we have plenty of awareness.

Speaker 2 (42:55):
Yeah, so every time, like one of my friends would
always like tag me in one ofthose, I would just never
respond, but it was like causeI'm using my influence that I
have limited and some of thetalents that I possess that's
God given to make a difference.
You know, it's the wholepurpose of doing this podcast is
like I'm hoping to reach peopleout there and build better
leaders and the same thing.

(43:16):
What you're trying to do andpeople.

Speaker 3 (43:19):
People struggle with their spiritual esteem, but, um,
you know, when they may say youknow, the world is better off
with them.
No, without them.
With them, but, um, the worldis not better off without you,
because each individual and eachspirit brings, you know,
uniqueness and perspective.
And they have people who lovethem, and their family, and and
and people who love them intheir workplace and in their

(43:41):
lives, and to and to turn theirhead on the bag or to turn their
, their thought process awayfrom that and into something
dark, you know, is somethingthat they should really consider
what their actions will lead to, if, if they can.
And so there, there, there,there becomes the medical part

(44:02):
where, where you know, themedical people have to have
their, have their place right.
They need to have these peoplepossibly looked at and spoken to
professionally in order forthem to work through the things
I just stated right.
And so everybody has their rolein place and we have to be sure
to provide the proper medicaland psychology support to these

(44:25):
individuals that are in need.
And, trust me, when I visitedthe different posts throughout
the nation I won't say whichbranch, but as I visited the
post, people will come up to mein the strangest moments and say
you know what my staff isreally struggling because of
ADLC?
And these are not combat staffs, these are people that have to

(44:48):
deal with the public inemergency situations, right, so
it's across the board.
I find and so that worries me alittle bit that it's not this
whole concept, that it's PTSD,brain trauma.
You know veterans that are over, you know fighting ISIS, it's
people throughout the entiremilitary for different reasons,

(45:10):
and how we begin to reallyaddress that is something that
will only strengthen the UnitedStates military and strengthen
the individuals.
You know, somebody who haspersonal esteem, spiritual
occupation, physical, is a lotstronger individual than
somebody who's struggling in allthree right.

(45:30):
So I think if we can buildpeople and build the soldiers
and the sailors with that typeof attitude, you've got a really
powerful force coming atwhoever you're going after.

Speaker 2 (45:42):
That framework.
We just circled back to it andthat is a critical piece.
And I've seen, I know ofgeneral officers that's
committed suicide.
I know of majors and colonelswho've had mental breakdowns
like hiding under their bunk ina training situation because
they just did not want to befound, and I know that.
But because we ask so much, our, our nation's greatest resource

(46:07):
and it's the men and women whoserve and and you are one of
those, I would consider you, youknow, a patriot, who who serves
our country.
We ask so much and we oftengive them so little in terms of
resources to actually accomplishthe mission, and it's so they
kind of give you kind of a brain.
Um, to frame my current jobthat I'm in right now, my team

(46:30):
of three people is managing 34acquisition programs, which is
just insane when you think about, you know, po Aviation in
Huntsville, alabama, pmuas has36 or 34 programs and that's a
360-man person organization.
I have three people and I manage34 programs, but I do it for

(46:53):
such a unique organization thatI will find a way to yes, we
will find a way to yes, and thatlevel of time that it takes to
do that and be intentional, youlose yourself.
So you have to have a frameworkthat you can balance yourself
with.
Yours and mine is exactly thesame.
Mine's a little bit morerudimentary because it's more

(47:13):
basic.
I keep in that kismet, but Ilove that.
But I'd love to kind of steerit now to your philanthropic
philosophy.
So what is a philanthropist,first of all, and then what
drove you to serve so deeplywithin the veteran community?

Speaker 3 (47:30):
Really, I've been trained with a very I've been
mentored by some of the greatphilanthropists of our time.
Jack London, you know, helpedme, guide me in terms of how he
guided CACI, in terms of theirsponsorships and what they do,
and so he helped guide me.
And what's great aboutmentorship is you know, you

(47:51):
listen to all what they say andthen you sort of do what you
want to do, but you take intheir efforts and their
knowledge.
So I didn't do exactly what hesaid, but it gave me a framework
to do it.
You know, maybe 70% of what hesaid right or 80%, and that
really helped me.
So, getting mentorship on termsof when everybody's coming

(48:12):
after you for money, you knowhow to balance and make
decisions that will makeeveryone feel good about you,
know your contribution but alsomaximize your capability Right.
So without him I would not havebeen able to execute the last
five years as efficiently as Ihave.
So he passed away.

(48:33):
He was the chairman of the boardof CACI and a billionaire and
just a wonderful man, and nowhis wife, dr Jennifer Lunden, is
running his philanthropic worknow.
But he really helped guide me.
So does that answer thequestion of how, like I got
started and you know theguidance of how to distribute

(48:56):
the funding and that's a smallpiece of what you know.
That's sort of a piece of whatI do.
But now I'm more of a proactiveaction individual engaging in
the not-for-profits and whatI've been doing lately is
helping them with grant work.
So you know I can help themwith their grant work, which
will provide them much moremoney than what I could provide

(49:18):
philanthropically myself.
So I'm sort of taking it toanother whole level in terms of
volunteers, where I'm gettingthem the opportunities based on
the different opportunitiesthroughout the nation for their
particular mission and I'mhelping them with their grant
work, and that is much morebeneficial than than my actual
philanthropic work.
The philanthropic work helpscertain little needs that are

(49:42):
needed throughout a year for anorganization, but it doesn't
make the organization if thatmakes sense.
What does?
make sense is more of the grant,providing an annual income that
they'll get from that is fargreater than anything I could
give.
So that's sort of my growth asa leader is learning that piece

(50:03):
and being able to expand mymodel of how to assist people
outside of just, you know, mytime or treasure, right.
So I'm doing a lot more thanjust philanthropic work.
It's far, far greater than that, and also the contribution of
the knowledge of how anot-for-profit works is very
beneficial.

Speaker 2 (50:25):
That's another thing too, is that?
So this is just anotherresource that a veteran could be
listening to, of trying tofigure out for transition
purposes.
I've seen now working with somany organizations that develop
material solutions for militaryproblems.
That are veteran companies andthey're all amazing people, but

(50:47):
of those it's hard.
It is hard for a new company toto start with the level of
resources that are required fora small business to kind of
stand up and and get going.
And I think about, like howmany small businesses fail?
Um, and I think through thelens of an entrepreneur.
An entrepreneur usually failsthree or four times before they

(51:09):
finally hit their stride andbecome successful.
You know, fail small, fail oftenand grow every single time.
So I love that concept of that.
You're providing anotheramazing resource for the veteran
based kind of communities and Ithink what 40, over 40 programs
right now or organizationsRight right?

Speaker 3 (51:30):
I help a lot of different programs.
That's crazy and they're allamazing and they're all very
different and they all engage inone of the three aspects we
were talking about.
Yeah, you know, dear to myheart, you know, due to the fact
that people do, there's alsothe there's also, I'm sorry,

(51:52):
there's also the transition into, into entrepreneurism.
I'm very involved with groupslike Veterans Growing America
and the American Legion.
I'm working extremely hard onthe GI Bill to expand that to
entrepreneurial funding.
So I'm working with theAmerican Legion on that right
now in terms of legislation.
So, you know, it's all it's allabout.

(52:14):
How do we, how do we make theexperience of people who don't
want to go the traditional routeand get the resume and you know
, go what if?
What?
If a young man wants to get outand go and start his own
business, Well, how are we goingto help him on that, Right?
So I'm working really hard ontrying to provide verticals that

(52:36):
will allow them to explore andfail right, but also explore and
um and try the differentelements of entrepreneurism that
they want.
Um, because entrepreneurismreally is a key to the veteran
community, because you guys aregreat at starting businesses,
because when you get out.
You want your mission and youwant your purpose to be part of
something that is useful to thenation.
Whether it's Don Neal Jones, youknow, Veterans Growing America,

(52:59):
right?
He was a command sergeant majorfor the United States Army and
now he's.
Now he pulled all these peopletogether and they're all.
They're all selling their goodsand they're all veterans, right
?
Well, this, these are wonderfulconcepts and and and and.
The possibility ofentrepreneurism needs to become
more real and more a little bitmore easier access to capital

(53:21):
that's something I'm workingreally hard on with the American
Legion, Okay.
And we're coming up with reallyunique ideas, because if we can
do the PPP loan and give out atrillion dollars, we can come up
with a concept that uses cashas collateralization to help
businesses get money.
So these are but not have riskto the banks and the people in

(53:41):
the different groups that areborrowing money.
So these are concepts that wehave to work on and try to make
happen for the young peoplecoming out that want to start
their own business.
So I want it to be an equalelement Start your own business.
We want to go through thetraditional route of getting a
job.
It's up to you, but we willhelp you one way or the other

(54:02):
that would be the ultimate goal.

Speaker 2 (54:04):
You made a beautiful transition because I was going
to ask you walk me through someof your current efforts that you
have with the american legionbut I want, I want to say I want
to say that I am going to haveto pick up my, my, my game when
it comes to serving.
So my wife and I, I break my.

(54:25):
So the three areas that wetalked about work, work, family,
self.
I take it even further andyou're going to love this.
I call it the seven F's right.
So fun, friends-filled, finance, fitness, faith and family.
We set a definable spark matrixevery single year.
That's 10 years out.
So long-term vision for ourfamily, and every year we have

(54:46):
communities that we want toserve.
So Arlington for this year, Iwould year we have communities
that we want to serve.
So our LinkedIn for this year.
I would love to take my familyto go hang reefs so I can help
connect the head, heart and theliver.

Speaker 3 (54:56):
I just did a reef for .

Speaker 2 (54:58):
I did, and I was peanut butter and chili.
I'm living vicariously throughyour LinkedIn, but I'm going to
have to.

Speaker 3 (55:08):
That was a great, once in a lifetime moment.

Speaker 2 (55:11):
Yeah, and I knew that was.
I think we talked on the phoneright before that event.
You didn't know necessarilywhat was going to happen.

Speaker 3 (55:18):
Yes, I didn't know.
I didn't know I was going tolay a wreath among the sacred
steps of the tomb of the unknownsoldier, that's amazing.
Yeah, it was really once in alifetime.
And again it's participating,it's action, it's dedication to
one's nation.
These things do not happen andthey are not given to people
that aren't engaged.

Speaker 2 (55:39):
So if you want to make a, difference.

Speaker 3 (55:40):
You got to get out and you got to stop complaining
about how bad something, someconception about how bad things
are.
They aren't bad at all.
When you go to the ArlingtonNational Cemetery and you see
all the people that served, allthe people that passed away due
to their service, and honoringthem, you'll have a whole
different perspective of howgreat our nation is, because it

(56:02):
is the greatest nation in theworld.

Speaker 2 (56:07):
Go ahead.
I'm sorry.

Speaker 3 (56:09):
No, no, no.

Speaker 2 (56:10):
That was done.
I had a very humblingexperience when I first joined
the military and I blessed andcursed, I guess, in the way of
the platoon that I took over inAfghanistan.
My first interaction with themwas at Sergeant Rodriguez's
memorial and if you've everattended a service member's

(56:31):
memorial and garrison, it is avery emotionally charged fair.
Now do that in a combat zone.
It is a whole other level.

Speaker 3 (56:43):
And.

Speaker 2 (56:43):
I didn't even know the platoon that I was going on,
but I saw the company commanderin tears, barely being able to
talk, the platoon leader intears, barely able to talk, 120
barrel-chested freedom fightersthat I probably didn't have any
headspace and timing to reallyunderstand how great those men
were at that moment in time,just on their knees.

(57:05):
And then when I went throughthat, it changed me.
It changed my whole life of howI viewed leadership, because I
was coming in that role ofhaving a very selfish mentality
of how can I do as good as Ipossibly can so I can go serve
as a platoon leader in 75thRanger Regiment and go do all
these things that I wanted to do?

(57:26):
And that moment it stopped mein my tracks and made me think
about I'm here to serve, so howcan I serve this team the best
possible way that I can?
And being able to go toArlington, I think, for my
family would probably be able todo that same connection,
because it's hard to show thatto people who don't understand

(57:50):
or live.
You have to see it and it is.

Speaker 3 (57:55):
It is an amazing sight and every, every american
should have together we talked alittle bit um yeah, about
shared experience and and theloss of shared experience and
how that's affecting our nation.
Yeah, and you know that'sanother whole topic, maybe for
another day, but yeah, but that,but I think you're sort of
tapping into that.
You have to have that sharedexperience that you had with

(58:18):
those, those soldiers on thebattlefield.
Um, you know, my sharedexperiences is seeing families,
you know, on their knees becausetheir, their child, committed
suicide and they sent them offto the army, or they feel their
own guilt, and family guilt, ofwhat occurred.
Okay, so all of these thingsare intertwined in terms of

(58:38):
service and learning throughexperience, and also learning by
not being selfish and embracingall the different groups
throughout the nation andtreating them all your brothers
and sisters, because we all are.
We all are.
You know all souls and withinthe vehicle and we're, you know
we start and we finish right.
So there's absolutely nothingto be um jealous about.

(59:01):
You know, I did talk to you alittle bit sally and I talk
about jealousy and how thataffects leadership and you have.
You have to rise above it butyou also have to be aware of it
because it can be damagingtoward your greater good.
The people that are possiblyjealous of me have they done
anything to help anybody otherthan themselves?
Probably not right, but theycan cause damage towards all the

(59:23):
good that I'm doing.
So I cannot ignore it.
And a lot of people say, justignore those people, they don't
know what they're talking about.
Well, you know and haveovercome them.
I've overcome them through hardwork and showing people what

(01:00:00):
I'm doing, and when they seethat the jealousy sort of goes
away and admiration and moredignity come in sort of goes
away and admiration and moredignity come in.

Speaker 2 (01:00:12):
I think every episode has a theme.
Every person that I get to talkto and just listen to their
incredible story has a theme,and yours, I would sum up, is
character and consistency.
That you have an unwaveringcharacter because you know who
you are and how you want to showup and what the changes that
you want to make.
And you are consistent, andthroughout your you, you were
consistent.
You said something there, too,that that I think this, this

(01:00:34):
nation, needs to hear more of isthat we're all one team, one
fight.
It doesn't matter where youcome from, it doesn't matter
what your socioeconomicbackground is we are all
Americans and put any of us in acountry that does not like
Americans and they would treatyou exactly the same, and I
really wish that we had.

(01:00:55):
I don't know if I'll get introuble for saying this, but
mandatory service requirements.

Speaker 3 (01:00:59):
No, I'm all into it Me and.
General McChrystal, we're allinto it Because you're not
allowed.
Don't go there, go back ashared purpose.

Speaker 2 (01:01:09):
But I've worked with some amazing people throughout
my time in the military and onething that was never brought up
was race never brought up.
You could be with uh refugeesfrom different companies, who
are different countries, whocame to serve here because they
wanted to come from haiti.
I had several soldiers thatwere from or ha, haitian,

(01:01:30):
directly from Haiti, some of thebest soldiers I've ever had
hands down.
I had immigrants from Vietnamcould be in my formation.
I've had people from the innercity of Chicago and Detroit and
I had good old farm boys fromNebraska, but everyone came
together.
And why did they come together?
Because they had sharedsuffering and pain, but they
also had a shared purpose and Ithink as a country, we're kind

(01:01:53):
of missing that.
And then and the unfortunatething about most of the time of
when we do truly come togetheris through a tragic event.
So think about, like 9-11, ofthat camaraderie that we had
about being an American Well,that required a deep sacrifice
to this nation to get back tothat.
And I'm hoping that we don'thave to go to that level to

(01:02:15):
recreate that bond.
But what you just said, thiscountry and honestly this world,
just needs to hear more of thattype of message.

Speaker 3 (01:02:24):
And the Rookie of the Year for the Baltimore Orioles.
Al Bunbury, he played with CalRipken, won a World Series in
1968.
He was possibly the firstplatoon leader in Vietnam
African-American in 1968.
And he stated that.
You know exactly what youstated.
He said there was no racism.

(01:02:46):
I was just in charge of gettingthese boys home alive, that's
all he said.
So you know this is a timelessgift that you know the military
gets that 1% of seeing everybodyas equal and seeing everybody
for their character and theirability to protect one another
and not race.

(01:03:07):
My growing up in DC sort ofspoiled me, where I've been with
the different races andnationalities of the entire
world all the time, so that'snever really been part of my
vocabulary.
But again, if we had sharedexperience, if everybody did
have to pull together at the ageof 18 and 19, we would have a

(01:03:28):
stronger sense of self and alsoa stronger sense of national
pride.
And I see it in Greece.
I see it in different countriesthroughout the world where
service mandatory.
You see it in Israel, you knowwhere service mandatory is
mandatory.
So this is not something wehave to do in terms of military

(01:03:49):
only.
We can also do it for you know,serving in your community or
serving yeah, 100%.
Yeah, maybe at a differentstate, you know, but serving
community and all doing ittogether is one.
So that is something that I doendorse as well, only because I
know the shared experience willmake our nation stronger and

(01:04:09):
it's not to put a burden onthese and a young person.
They will get paid to do itright, you know.
Just have that option to havethat shared experience would
really help bring everybodytogether instead of continuing
to have those people beingpulled apart based on something
that isn't relevant towardnational survival right.

Speaker 2 (01:04:33):
I wanna tell you that , looking at the clock, I can't
believe it's already an hour.
And we've talked about this isthat we would be able to do a
podcast recording for probablyover two hours and rival Joe
Rogan right, I have a hard stopat 715, but I don't want this
conversation to end because Ihave so many dang questions that

(01:04:55):
I haven't even been able tobring up, so I'll pose this one.
Walk me through some of theawesome projects that you're
working in 2024 that's coming up.

Speaker 3 (01:05:02):
Well, 2024, I'm going to be working with the American
Leasing on the GI Bill and theAdvocacy Capital for the for
entrepreneurial veterans as apilot program and sort of taking
some of the concepts that welearned in PPP program and
discussing those throughout theLegion to construct realistic

(01:05:26):
legislation.
That would not be presented byme, of course.
It would be presented byprofessional people that lobby
these different laws.
But we're working on that.
That's really interesting.
I'm working on the Navy MuseumProject.
It's a billion-dollar facilityoff the wharf.
I'm working very closely withyour friend and future friend,
robert Irvine, who is alsodeeply involved with that

(01:05:49):
project.
But I'm doing a lot offundraising for them and
determined to make that impactas well as I can do.
With regards to that and it'sreally dear to my heart with the
family being Navy in the pastthe Citizen Warrior Coalition is
for the reserve, so we'll behelping the reserves and
educating businesses on the law,on what they can do and how

(01:06:09):
they hire and how they have tokeep them hired, and also, you
know, no negativity toward theiremployment and their
obligations to the nation.
So we have to do a better jobglobally over the entire nation
in the Army, navy, air Force,marine for retention purposes,
which are critical to thepreparation and preparedness of

(01:06:31):
our nation's military in termsof conflict.
That just goes without saying.
So I'm going to be working onthat really hard.
I'm working on the Wounded PawProject.
It's an anti-dogfighting ringand people might say, how's that
military?
Well, it's tied with humantrafficking and every negative
thing you can think of insociety is tied to that type of

(01:06:51):
activity.
So it brings me back to lawenforcement, which I was
involved with in the past, and alot of other.
Fbi, CIA.
And it will help me educatemyself more on the whole topic
of human trafficking and how themilitary is trying to combat
that as well.
And then, finally, I'm going towell, I'm working on two more
American GI Forum.

(01:07:11):
I'm going to be working reallyclosely with them, with their
initiatives throughout the year,and of course, I'm on the
Kuskar Foundation Board.
I'll be working with them withthe mental resilience programs,
with the senior leadership thereas well as the board, and
trying to make a differenceagain with helping people before
they become critical and tryingto identify them before their

(01:07:35):
mental problems become moreserious.
And I'm trying to to curve andcome up with some really good
best practices to spreadthroughout all the different
branches.
So that is some of what I'mgoing to be doing next year,
which is new, which I'm veryexcited about.
I still have all my othertraditional things I'm doing,

(01:07:56):
but it's going to be really busy, right, but I wouldn't want it
any other way and this is what Ireally want to engage in and
I'm passionate about making adifference.
I do blend this in with myfull-time job and I'm going to
be really focused on that aswell next year, but I think that
it's going to be a great 2024,because all these initiatives

(01:08:18):
are so special and needed and Ithink I'm going to make a really
strong national impact.

Speaker 2 (01:08:23):
So I'm moving more from local, you know, helping
out like local groups and toreally engaging in national
issues yeah you, you let me knowif you need any free service
and I'm going to get themcmillian clan out there and go
help you.
Uh, because that's one thing Iwant to get my daughter more
involved in, because she'salready a little natural leader,
so it's safe to say in f andfy24.

(01:08:44):
I guess I've been conditioned tosay that now, uh, 2024, you're
not really doing a whole lotright?
No, I'm joking, that isincredible man.
Your dedication to this countryis inspiring and I always kind
of go back to that John QuincyAdams quote of the definition of
inspire, and I'll have to lookit up.
But if your actions inspireothers to do more, be more,

(01:09:06):
become more than your leader,and you are the epitome of
everything that is good withinthis country.
And I think you said it beforeand this was in the opening
notes as well is that you're apatriot to this country, and I
think part of being a patriotand living in the greatest
country in the world is livingin a free country, being able to

(01:09:29):
say what you want, be able todo what you want, be able to
start a business because youhave the ability to do that.
I think freedom is such animportant trait and
characteristic that our countryhas that has to be protected,
and I'd love to turn it over toyou because I know you prepared
a comment on this, defining whatfreedom is.

Speaker 3 (01:09:50):
This is my freedom means statement.
And it was created for Marty,and Marty and James Feltz, both
Army.
One was an Army colonel, theother was Army Special Forces,
green Beret.
Sorry, but these are two greatAmericans and I dedicate them to

(01:10:15):
you, pam, and I dedicated themto you, and I dedicate this to
all the different veteransthroughout the nation.
This is for you and this iswhat freedom means to me, but it
also is totally dedicated toall of you.
Freedom means we live in thegreatest nation representing
freedom.
America loves a winner, americaloves the underdog, america

(01:10:37):
loves the comeback kid, and weall have fallen into one of
those categories, regardlesswhich category you are in.
All Americans have the freedomto find the strength inside
themselves to go on the personaljourney or the pursuit of
happiness.
One, then, will find thestrength inside themselves to

(01:10:57):
achieve their own personalunderstanding of freedom.
May God give strength to ouractive duty.
May God give strength to our USveterans to protect all
Americans'.
May God give strength to our USveterans to protect all
Americans' pursuit of happinessto protect all Americans'
freedom.

Speaker 2 (01:11:14):
I love that, brother.
That's amazing.
I usually do a final showsegment that I call the Killer
Bees, but I don't want to takeaway from that amazing kind of
definition of freedom that youkind of summed up.
That's beautiful and I thinkthat's an absolutely great way
to end the show.
But before we do, what I'd loveto ask is one of those killer

(01:11:37):
bee questions is how can ourlisteners find you and how can
they add value to you, because Iknow you're doing so much, but
how can they find you and howcan they add value to your
missions that you have going?

Speaker 3 (01:11:46):
on.
You can find me on LinkedIn,David Vardaman.
You'll see my face, just thesame one that you use for the
promo.
I think the way you bring valueis.
I need support in terms of justspiritual and good wishes,
because a lot of what.
I do is sort of baked in now interms of my actions.
What I need is A lot of what Ido is sort of baked in now in

(01:12:08):
terms of my actions.
What I need is, you know,people that recognize and
appreciate the effort and if Ican get more people like that
and that would just build that.
Everybody needs a littleinspiration or a little thank
you once in a while.
We don't need them very often,like I don't think Joshua and I
need it very often, but justevery once in a while.

(01:12:28):
You know it just makes theworld of difference.
And you know my getting the GIForum, the American GI Forum.
You know selecting me andallowing me to carry their
wreath on Veterans Day.
You know on the.
You know on the sacred groundof the unknown soldier was
really really special towards.
You know, on the sacred groundof the unknown soldier was

(01:12:48):
really really special towards.
You know making my year andalso making all the hard work I
do worth it.
Tomb of the Unknown Soldier.
I'm sorry but yeah, walkingthose sacred steps, very, very
few civilians will ever walk it,and so for me to be honored to
do that, you know that is.
That tells me that I'm doingeverything right.

(01:13:10):
That tells me that you knowanybody if I can do it.
Anybody can be a US patriot andreally deliver what the country
needs.
And do not do not think thatyou are too busy, do not think
that you are too caught up inother important matters.
There's nothing more important.
There is nothing more importantthan giving back and doing the

(01:13:33):
very best for your nation.
That will define you, that willlive on with you for the rest
of your life.
So don't throw that opportunityaway.

Speaker 2 (01:13:42):
Engage it, david.
This has been an absolutelyphenomenal podcast and I did
have a hard stop at 7.15.
But I will tell you that Ididn't even get to a fraction of

(01:14:13):
the.
An even better place because wedo live in the greatest country
in the world and, trust me,because I've seen some of what
the worst humanity has to offer,and a lot of the problems that
we have here are so minute andfractions of what we deal with
that I'm blessed and honored tonow have you as a friend brother
, so thank you for everythingthat you do.

Speaker 3 (01:14:34):
Thank you too, and what you're doing with the
podcast is absolutely amazingand I think you're on pace to
just make a huge difference andallow the really great Americans
to be on, and people should belooking out every week for your
videos.
And you know, I had to make ita little difficult for Richard
in the next show.

Speaker 2 (01:14:55):
You got to give me some inside baseball questions
to ask him.

Speaker 3 (01:15:00):
I'll email those to you, but he's a great American.
Your next show is going to beabsolutely stunning.

Speaker 2 (01:15:05):
I love it really.
Well, hey, have a great night,david, and I look forward to
talking to you in the future.
All right, team, it's time forour after action review.
That was a phenomenal episodewith David and it's just
inspiring to hear everythingthat he is doing and the impacts

(01:15:25):
that he is making at a nationallevel.
And you heard some of theefforts of FY24, 2024 that he's
gonna be doing.
It's just inspiring and italways goes back to a quote and
I was able to find it from JohnQuincy Adams If your actions
inspire others to dream more,learn more, do more and become
more, you are a leader.

(01:15:46):
And he is a leader because heembodies that type of selfless
service to this nation.
So what is the first keytakeaway?
The first one I have is findyour formula.
So we talked about personal,occupational, spiritual and
having those buckets in life tobe able to find fulfillment.
But I shared mine, which waswork, family, self.

(01:16:10):
And then, to take it evenfurther, I break those down into
seven critical areas that Ihave for my life, which I call
those the seven F's, or thepillars of my life.
And it's all based on freedom,and we'll get to that here in a
second.
But it's all based on freedomat the top.
Fulfillment finance.
But it's all based on freedomat the top Fulfillment finance,
family, fitness, faith, field,which is my career and fun.

(01:16:32):
And all those feed into myfreedom goals and I have a 10
year freedom goal that I havewith my wife, going through the
smart filter of specific,measurable, attainable,
realistic, time based and shared, because I share it with the
woman that I love and that keepsa thread when life gets crazy

(01:16:53):
right.
Because we have work issues, wehave family issues, we have
self issues and unless we canhave a formula that allows us to
work through that, we're nevergoing to truly gain momentum and
continue to move forward.
That's all life is.
It's just moving forward.
But to do so you have to havethose threads that allow you to

(01:17:17):
move forward.
And his framework is beautifuland he also connected that with
how he does business.
He doesn't do business withpeople that don't have those
types of threads orcommonalities within his life,
that don't have those types ofthreads or commonalities within
his life, and he also findsthose people who need that in
their life to make change, andone of the occupational ones
that we've talked about, that iswhere you know veteran suicide

(01:17:40):
is highly prevalent.
Why?
Because that's when it's atransition point of kind of what
we've talked about.
So the first key takeaway isfind the formula that works for
you and then continue to developit.
The second one is consistencyand character, and that was the
theme throughout this entireepisode, with David starting off

(01:18:02):
as a young banker all the waynow to doing everything that he
does as a senior vice presidentand every nonprofit organization
that he works for and all theother veteran communities that
he helps.
Two things were trueConsistency.
He didn't get to this level ofsuccess or significance, I would

(01:18:26):
argue to say, because of luck.
He did it through years andyears and years and years of
showing up and being consistentwith his actions and what we
always go back to the concept ofrad.
He was routine, he wasaccountable and he was
disciplined because he knewwhere he was wanting to go,
because he had perspective, hehad alignment between his head,

(01:18:46):
heart and hand.
And then the most important oneis character Deeds, not words.
Doing what you say you're goingto do, being a person who can
be value added to theorganization, but also a high
degree of character and veryreliable.
And if you can do those twothings, if you can be consistent
and you have a strong character, then you're going to see

(01:19:10):
success.
Regardless of what you'rewanting to do, wherever you're
listening, whatever yourprofession is, you have
consistency and you havecharacter, you're going to see
growth in your life.
And the last one is make adifference.
We talked about that towardsthe end.
We all have talent, we all havetime, we all have treasures

(01:19:32):
three T's that I always like tothrow out there and I learned
that from Jerry St Pierre that Ihad on my podcast episode.
But there are so many resourcesout there right now that you
can do to make a change inwhatever you want your life to
have meaning and passion and apurpose.
For me, it's saving veteranslives, and I do that through

(01:19:53):
using my influence and myplatform to help build better
leaders.
Show you a better way of doingthat, that there's a
transformational, servant way ofbeing a better leader, and it
goes back to a quote that Ifound developing this AAR from
John F Kennedy.
Too often we enjoy the comfortof opinion without the

(01:20:14):
discomfort of thought.
We all have an opinion and 22pushups a day is great for
bringing awareness to soldiers,veterans.
But we all have time, we allhave talents and we all have
treasures that we can activelygo, act and make a difference,
and that's what I'm challengingyou to do have talents and we
all have treasures that we canactively go, act and make a
difference, and that's what I'mchallenging you to do.
Whatever your passion and yourpurpose is in life.
The time is now.
Go act, take your time, takeyour treasures, take your

(01:20:38):
talents and go make a differencein this world.
Make it a better place.
Hey, team, do me a favor If youlike this episode, share this
podcast with someone that is aleader within their own right
and again, I see everyone as aleader.
So share it with everyone thatyou know, because you have to
lead yourself first and makesure that you go with whatever
platform you're listening andyou give this a review.

(01:20:59):
I don't care what you review it, it just helps me within the
algorithm.
But, if I can tempt you, leavea five-star review please, if
you're getting any value fromthe content and finally support
the show.
And you can do that by going toMcMillianLeadershipCoachingcom
and clicking the leadershipresources tab.
You'll see all the differentarticles that I've written.

(01:21:20):
You'll see all the differentpodcast episodes that I've done,
and I've also started doing newpodcast episodes on my website
atMcMillianLeadershipCoachingcom
and writing a blog article foreach one of my podcast episodes
that air.
So I'll have done a deliberateAAR.
You can go to that website whenthis episode airs and be able

(01:21:43):
to read through it so I candistill down all the wisdom that
David was able to share in avery short, concise manner.
Hey team, I'm your host, joshMcMillian, saying every day is a
gift.
Don't waste yours.
I'll see you next time.

All Episodes

#90 David Vardeman - Servant Leader, Patriot, & VP at Capital Bank

Episode Transcript

Popular Podcasts

Stuff You Should Know

The Breakfast Club

Crime Junkie

.css-15opob5{left:0;position:absolute;top:0.8rem;} All Episodes

.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}#90 David Vardeman - Servant Leader, Patriot, & VP at Capital Bank