Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi everyone.
I hope things are going wellfor you today.
What we're going to talk aboutin the next 10 minutes is unsafe
behavior, and I know we've allseen it in our child in one form
or the other.
So we're going to talk abouttwo different things with unsafe
behavior One that they injecton other people or that they do
(00:24):
to themselves, and we've seenboth of that.
So what we're going to talkabout first is injuries to
others.
So if your child is like hitting, biting, hurting other people
or sometimes to get theirattention, if you remember one
of my podcasts, I talked aboutthe reasons why they have the
(00:47):
behaviors, and there's like fourof them, and one of them is
access to something, they wantsomething or they want your
attention or something of thatnature.
So we're going to first blockthat.
(01:11):
So just, you know a defensiveplace.
Let's say let's give an example, though let's redo that for a
minute that they're going to hityou.
So you're sitting at your deskor your table and you can see
them coming up with their fistsand they go to, you know, hit
you somewhere with their fists.
So what you do is you blockthat and kind of turn away, your
(01:35):
head away, and then show them.
You know, if they want yourattention, just to tap and then
keep ignoring them, don'tacknowledge that they're there
or that how they are trying toget your attention but once they
do the correct thing, say tap,please, you can use your voice
(01:57):
too.
Then look at them and say, yes,may I help you?
Or whatever the case may be.
Now, if they go to hit anotherchild, then that could be a
different reason why they aredoing that Maybe not get their
attention, but maybe they wantsomething, they want their toy,
or they don't want them sittingnext to them or something like
(02:18):
that.
So again, then you have to usewords, you have to say no,
that's not how we do that.
What do we need to say?
And then voice what they needto say, say, may I have that?
Can we share those kind of typeof things that you need to work
on?
So it's basically you block,redirect and then reinforce the
(02:44):
behavior, and then once they,you know, do and then reinforce
the behavior.
And then, once they, you know,do what they're supposed to do,
and the more that they do, thatyou want to keep rewarding them
and we'll talk a little moreabout that in a minute, when
given a chance to try it againand made a correct decision.
We do want them to be rewarded,but don't let me how.
(03:05):
I want to say that it's notreally big.
You know the reward would beyou would acknowledge them.
Yes, what can I help you with?
But let's say that they come toyou and they do the tap.
Then you really want to make abig deal out of it.
Yay, thank you for doing that.
That was really good and that'swhat we want to see.
(03:26):
We want to see if they docorrect it too, but not as much
as they do it the first time.
So make sure, if they come andthey do it the first time, that
you really commend them on thatis self-injury behaviors.
That is something like a lot ofkids, and I've just had a
(03:47):
student that did this andheadbanging and at first it
would scare the jeebies rightout of me.
I mean it's like because hewould really hit his head.
And so what you want to do, youknow, like if we're in a school
or anything, not so much aparent you know you're not to
touch the kids and stuff, but wehave to make sure they're safe,
(04:07):
and so maybe just gently, youknow, put your hand there and
this can be done at home tooyour hand, so they don't keep
banging and just kind of leanthem towards there.
We don't want them to hurtthemselves.
So the first attempt is safety,of course, and you want to
interrupt, you want to blockthat behavior, maybe with just a
(04:29):
light touch and, if possible,just a little bit of moving away
of the area so he cannot banghis head, or he or she Redirect
it with a task, something thatthey want to do, not something
that they don't want to do.
If they were working onsomething and they didn't want
(04:49):
to do it and they start bangingtheir head, you don't want to
stop the banging and then goback to the task that they
didn't want to do.
You want to redirect them intosomething that they want to do
to get them away from thatbehavior.
Then go back into the task thatyou want to do.
So, remember, if they'rehitting, pinching, biting, they
(05:12):
want access to something, mostlikely.
So you got to build thatcommunication.
You got to maintain safety foryourself, for the other children
in the home or at in theclassroom, and for themselves
too.
So there's a lot of differentways.
I know that schools if you havesomebody that because I did have
that was pretty violent.
(05:32):
He hit, hit a lot and I wasalways blocking because, you
know, a lot of times it wasn'talways directed to me but it was
directed to another child and Ihad to protect that child.
Especially some of them were alot younger and a lot smaller,
and so I would stand in betweenuntil we could get some help.
And it was recommended to me totake a course.
(05:56):
They have courses at placesthat you work to teach you how
to do things properly and nothurt a child.
So one of the things you wantto do the first thing, because
we want to get these behaviorsunder control.
That is top priority.
(06:17):
It comes before even educationor anything else.
You have to get these behaviorsunder control because if not,
everything else in life suffers.
So the first thing is you wantto build communication.
You want to be able to.
If they're verbal, let's saythey're verbal and then I'll
work on nonverbal.
But for verbal, you want tomodel how they should approach
(06:38):
somebody, not just grab and takeaway and run or hurt a hit.
You want to say teach them howto ask for something, or can I
have that please, may I sit down?
Things like that.
You know that you want to beable to model them, but when you
model it, you want them to sayit too.
So you want them to repeat it.
So if they're listening to you,just say, well, you have to say
(07:02):
it too.
You know it's not just yousaying it, they have to say it
too.
So verbally correct thesentence if it's not appropriate
, and so you know.
If they're mean, give me that.
I want that.
You can't have a callinganother student names or sibling
names.
You need to be able to changethat vocabulary and say this is
(07:26):
not how we talk.
We talk like this, you know,and can I please have that when
you're done?
Or something like that.
So the second thing is to teachtolerance, and I talked about
this in my last podcast.
One of the things you can dowhen we're doing different types
of things like if they did atask and then they're going to
(07:50):
get something, say we're goingto wait one minute, set a little
timer and when the minute'sdone, this will help teach
tolerance with them.
So that's one reason I alwayssay you know if you can build in
some wait time here or therealong the way we all have to
wait here and there anyway.
But teach them.
You need to teach them how towait.
Yes, you can have a Popsicle,but we're going to wait one
(08:14):
minute, okay.
Or we're going to wait twominutes and then do it.
So when the two minutes up, youcan have it and after a while
they get used to it and theyunderstand it.
So understand it and also teachturn taking, how to take turns.
A good way to do that and wedon't do it much anymore is
board games.
If you can just play one simpleboard game and have them, teach
(08:37):
them to learn how to take turns, I've been doing that on
Fridays in my classrooms.
We've been getting out boardgames and I was a little
surprised on how they didn'tunderstand how to take turns or
what goes next and little simplethings that sometimes you take
for granted that they do knowand they don't not with our
(08:58):
electronics anymore.
But that's a good way to teachturn taking.
Build in a reward system.
Teach turn taking, build in areward system.
So when they do take turns orthey do wait, of course, if
they're waiting for a treat,you're giving them a treat.
But give them a praise with atreat, say good job, waiting for
(09:19):
that, you did well, those kindsof things.
The third thing is maintainingsafety Safety for them, safety
for you.
So if they're exhibiting sometype of behavior, for example,
if I have a student that'sthrowing chairs, I'm going to
get the other kids out of theroom.
I don't want them to be injuredor hurt.
If that child is doingself-injury to her or him, then
(09:44):
I'm going to do what I can toremove that area or whatever
they have to in their hand orwhatever the case may be, to
help ensure that they are safetoo.
I've had a child that justrecently would self-injure
herself, but it was almost likeshe didn't realize what she was
doing and she started crying andI said, well, you're pulling
(10:07):
your own hair, you know, don'tpull your hair.
And kind of just gently moveher hand, you know.
And just telling her that madea difference, like, oh, this is
happening, you know.
So we need to make sure thatour surroundings are safe, that
they're not going to get intosomething that could hurt them
or hurt another child or hurtyou, that they're not going to
(10:27):
get into something that couldhurt them or hurt another child
or hurt you, and you know, toblock and turn away until the
behavior is under control.
Also, create a schedule.
If you're seeing this type ofbehavior happening again and
again, try to figure out why.
(10:48):
Why is it happening always atnoon on Monday, tuesday,
wednesday?
So what's going on?
Or maybe it's always on Mondaymorning in the classroom at nine
o'clock or something like that.
So think about what's happening.
Did they have breakfast?
Could that be something?
They're hungry and kind of seta schedule and figure out okay,
every day at this time they arehitting another student or
(11:11):
throwing a chair or whatever thecase may be.
And then the next day or so, ifit's happening at a certain time
in every day, then try to andbuild in a reward for that time
and say, hey, you know you'regoing to go 20 minutes without
hurting yourself or doing thisand that and you're going to get
(11:32):
a reward today for doing that.
And then do it right away.
Make sure your rewards areright as soon as possible.
You know the tip of the icebergkind of thing to kind of get
look at different ways to helpwith self-injury or being
injured with other people ismaintain safety is the first
(11:58):
thing.
Build that communication, youknow.
Build those tolerance, to beable to weigh and be patient and
then, of course, maintainsafety at all costs.
So that's it for this podcast.
I will be looking into the nextones that I'll be doing around
spring break, which is in Marchfor us, is strategies to
(12:24):
increase communication skills,strategies to increase
independence and strategies toincrease communication skills,
strategies to increaseindependence and strategies to
increase social skills.
So we're going to work on that.
So like, for example,independence would be personal
teaching, building to betterbehaviors, breaking down skills,
problem solving, modeling,playing skills, those kind of
(12:48):
things.
And for communication would bemodeling, again, personal
teaching, joint attention, play,those things to help with our
kids.
I hope this helps some way withthese podcasts.
I don't have the cure, ofcourse.
I don't have all the answers,but I just put out things that I
learned and hope that it helpsyou too.
(13:10):
So have a blessed day and Iwill talk to you real soon.
Bye-bye.
Hi everyone.
I hope things are going wellfor you today.
What we're going to talk aboutin the next 10 minutes is unsafe
behavior, and I know we've allseen it in our child in one form
or the other.
So we're going to talk abouttwo different things with unsafe
behavior One that they injecton other people or that they do
(00:24):
to themselves, and we've seenboth of that.
So what we're going to talkabout first is injuries to
others.
So if your child is like hitting, biting, hurting other people
or sometimes to get theirattention, if you remember one
of my podcasts, I talked aboutthe reasons why they have the
(00:47):
behaviors, and there's like fourof them, and one of them is
access to something, they wantsomething or they want your
attention or something of thatnature.
So we're going to first blockthat.
(01:11):
So just, you know a defensiveplace.
Let's say let's give an example, though let's redo that for a
minute that they're going to hityou.
So you're sitting at your deskor your table and you can see
them coming up with their fistsand they go to, you know, hit
you somewhere with their fists.
So what you do is you blockthat and kind of turn away, your
(01:35):
head away, and then show them.
You know, if they want yourattention, just to tap and then
keep ignoring them, don'tacknowledge that they're there
or that how they are trying toget your attention but once they
do the correct thing, say tap,please, you can use your voice
(01:57):
too.
Then look at them and say, yes,may I help you?
Or whatever the case may be.
Now, if they go to hit anotherchild, then that could be a
different reason why they aredoing that Maybe not get their
attention, but maybe they wantsomething, they want their toy,
or they don't want them sittingnext to them or something like
(02:18):
that.
So again, then you have to usewords, you have to say no,
that's not how we do that.
What do we need to say?
And then voice what they needto say, say, may I have that?
Can we share those kind of typeof things that you need to work
on?
So it's basically you block,redirect and then reinforce the
(02:44):
behavior, and then once they,you know, do and then reinforce
the behavior.
And then, once they, you know,do what they're supposed to do,
and the more that they do, thatyou want to keep rewarding them
and we'll talk a little moreabout that in a minute, when
given a chance to try it againand made a correct decision.
We do want them to be rewarded,but don't let me how.
(03:05):
I want to say that it's notreally big.
You know the reward would beyou would acknowledge them.
Yes, what can I help you with?
But let's say that they come toyou and they do the tap.
Then you really want to make abig deal out of it.
Yay, thank you for doing that.
That was really good and that'swhat we want to see.
(03:26):
We want to see if they docorrect it too, but not as much
as they do it the first time.
So make sure, if they come andthey do it the first time, that
you really commend them on thatis self-injury behaviors.
That is something like a lot ofkids, and I've just had a
(03:47):
student that did this andheadbanging and at first it
would scare the jeebies rightout of me.
I mean it's like because hewould really hit his head.
And so what you want to do, youknow, like if we're in a school
or anything, not so much aparent you know you're not to
touch the kids and stuff, but wehave to make sure they're safe,
(04:07):
and so maybe just gently, youknow, put your hand there and
this can be done at home tooyour hand, so they don't keep
banging and just kind of leanthem towards there.
We don't want them to hurtthemselves.
So the first attempt is safety,of course, and you want to
interrupt, you want to blockthat behavior, maybe with just a
(04:29):
light touch and, if possible,just a little bit of moving away
of the area so he cannot banghis head, or he or she Redirect
it with a task, something thatthey want to do, not something
that they don't want to do.
If they were working onsomething and they didn't want
(04:49):
to do it and they start bangingtheir head, you don't want to
stop the banging and then goback to the task that they
didn't want to do.
You want to redirect them intosomething that they want to do
to get them away from thatbehavior.
Then go back into the task thatyou want to do.
So, remember, if they'rehitting, pinching, biting, they
(05:12):
want access to something, mostlikely.
So you got to build thatcommunication.
You got to maintain safety foryourself, for the other children
in the home or at in theclassroom, and for themselves
too.
So there's a lot of differentways.
I know that schools if you havesomebody that because I did have
that was pretty violent.
(05:32):
He hit, hit a lot and I wasalways blocking because, you
know, a lot of times it wasn'talways directed to me but it was
directed to another child and Ihad to protect that child.
Especially some of them were alot younger and a lot smaller,
and so I would stand in betweenuntil we could get some help.
And it was recommended to me totake a course.
(05:56):
They have courses at placesthat you work to teach you how
to do things properly and nothurt a child.
So one of the things you wantto do the first thing, because
we want to get these behaviorsunder control.
That is top priority.
(06:17):
It comes before even educationor anything else.
You have to get these behaviorsunder control because if not,
everything else in life suffers.
So the first thing is you wantto build communication.
You want to be able to.
If they're verbal, let's saythey're verbal and then I'll
work on nonverbal.
But for verbal, you want tomodel how they should approach
(06:38):
somebody, not just grab and takeaway and run or hurt a hit.
You want to say teach them howto ask for something, or can I
have that please, may I sit down?
Things like that.
You know that you want to beable to model them, but when you
model it, you want them to sayit too.
So you want them to repeat it.
So if they're listening to you,just say, well, you have to say
(07:02):
it too.
You know it's not just yousaying it, they have to say it
too.
So verbally correct thesentence if it's not appropriate
, and so you know.
If they're mean, give me that.
I want that.
You can't have a callinganother student names or sibling
names.
You need to be able to changethat vocabulary and say this is
(07:26):
not how we talk.
We talk like this, you know,and can I please have that when
you're done?
Or something like that.
So the second thing is to teachtolerance, and I talked about
this in my last podcast.
One of the things you can dowhen we're doing different types
of things like if they did atask and then they're going to
(07:50):
get something, say we're goingto wait one minute, set a little
timer and when the minute'sdone, this will help teach
tolerance with them.
So that's one reason I alwayssay you know if you can build in
some wait time here or therealong the way we all have to
wait here and there anyway.
But teach them.
You need to teach them how towait.
Yes, you can have a Popsicle,but we're going to wait one
(08:14):
minute, okay.
Or we're going to wait twominutes and then do it.
So when the two minutes up, youcan have it and after a while
they get used to it and theyunderstand it.
So understand it and also teachturn taking, how to take turns.
A good way to do that and wedon't do it much anymore is
board games.
If you can just play one simpleboard game and have them, teach
(08:37):
them to learn how to take turns, I've been doing that on
Fridays in my classrooms.
We've been getting out boardgames and I was a little
surprised on how they didn'tunderstand how to take turns or
what goes next and little simplethings that sometimes you take
for granted that they do knowand they don't not with our
(08:58):
electronics anymore.
But that's a good way to teachturn taking.
Build in a reward system.
Teach turn taking, build in areward system.
So when they do take turns orthey do wait, of course, if
they're waiting for a treat,you're giving them a treat.
But give them a praise with atreat, say good job, waiting for
(09:19):
that, you did well, those kindsof things.
The third thing is maintainingsafety Safety for them, safety
for you.
So if they're exhibiting sometype of behavior, for example,
if I have a student that'sthrowing chairs, I'm going to
get the other kids out of theroom.
I don't want them to be injuredor hurt.
If that child is doingself-injury to her or him, then
(09:44):
I'm going to do what I can toremove that area or whatever
they have to in their hand orwhatever the case may be, to
help ensure that they are safetoo.
I've had a child that justrecently would self-injure
herself, but it was almost likeshe didn't realize what she was
doing and she started crying andI said, well, you're pulling
(10:07):
your own hair, you know, don'tpull your hair.
And kind of just gently moveher hand, you know.
And just telling her that madea difference, like, oh, this is
happening, you know.
So we need to make sure thatour surroundings are safe, that
they're not going to get intosomething that could hurt them
or hurt another child or hurtyou, that they're not going to
(10:27):
get into something that couldhurt them or hurt another child
or hurt you, and you know, toblock and turn away until the
behavior is under control.
Also, create a schedule.
If you're seeing this type ofbehavior happening again and
again, try to figure out why.
(10:48):
Why is it happening always atnoon on Monday, tuesday,
wednesday?
So what's going on?
Or maybe it's always on Mondaymorning in the classroom at nine
o'clock or something like that.
So think about what's happening.
Did they have breakfast?
Could that be something?
They're hungry and kind of seta schedule and figure out okay,
every day at this time they arehitting another student or
(11:11):
throwing a chair or whatever thecase may be.
And then the next day or so, ifit's happening at a certain time
in every day, then try to andbuild in a reward for that time
and say, hey, you know you'regoing to go 20 minutes without
hurting yourself or doing thisand that and you're going to get
(11:32):
a reward today for doing that.
And then do it right away.
Make sure your rewards areright as soon as possible.
You know the tip of the icebergkind of thing to kind of get
look at different ways to helpwith self-injury or being
injured with other people ismaintain safety is the first
(11:58):
thing.
Build that communication, youknow.
Build those tolerance, to beable to weigh and be patient and
then, of course, maintainsafety at all costs.
So that's it for this podcast.
I will be looking into the nextones that I'll be doing around
spring break, which is in Marchfor us, is strategies to
(12:24):
increase communication skills,strategies to increase
independence and strategies toincrease communication skills,
strategies to increaseindependence and strategies to
increase social skills.
So we're going to work on that.
So like, for example,independence would be personal
teaching, building to betterbehaviors, breaking down skills,
problem solving, modeling,playing skills, those kind of
(12:48):
things.
And for communication would bemodeling, again, personal
teaching, joint attention, play,those things to help with our
kids.
I hope this helps some way withthese podcasts.
I don't have the cure, ofcourse.
I don't have all the answers,but I just put out things that I
learned and hope that it helpsyou too.
(13:10):
So have a blessed day and Iwill talk to you real soon.
Bye-bye.
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