Stress-Free Homework: Transforming Study Time with Engaging Strategies and Brain Insights for Children

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Is your child’s homework causing meltdowns and staring spells? Discover strategies that can transform study time into a manageable and even enjoyable experience. In this episode, we discuss how to recognize signs of stress and disengagement in children, ensuring study sessions are short and tailored to their age. From having all necessary supplies ready to varying how information is presented, we cover it all. Emphasizing the importance of being engaged in the learning process, we offer tips on using visual timers, breaks, and diverse activities to keep your child’s mental “gate” open, making learning more effective and less stressful.

Drawing from my experience in a reading lab, we also explore the fascinating world of child brain development, focusing on how different parts of the brain contribute to reading abilities. I share insights from specialized programs and discuss plans for further research to help you support your child's reading journey. Stay tuned for more valuable insights and another exciting podcast soon. Have a fantastic day and an even better week ahead!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hi, everyone, hope you're having a good day today.
Today we're going to talk alittle bit about working with
your child on doing homework, orif you're homeschooling.
So you're at the table withyour child and you're trying to
get an assignment done andthey're either turning their
backs on you or they're lookinginto space or having a meltdown.

(00:24):
Their backs on you or they'relooking into space or having a
meltdown and you just want to gohide and grab a gallon of ice
cream and eat it.
So what went wrong?
So the answer is that you'reworking against your child's
system and so their brains maybe working harder than what you
think.
So their brains may be workingharder than what you think and

(00:47):
if it's new information they'retrying to, you may be trying to
stretch their brain a little bitin ways that they're on maybe
overload and you don't realizeit.
They may be feeling stressed.
If they're just newlyhomeschooled, it kind of takes a
few weeks to kind of adjustfrom going to the routines of
school to routines at home.
Also, it's another thing thatyou need to consider.

(01:10):
So a child should come to thetable for between 10 to 20
minutes, and we're going to talka little bit about that in just
a minute you may be thinkingwell, that's what we do, but I
just wanted to finish the lasttwo problems and they did not
want to, or they read the lastparagraph or something like that
, and they refused.
So let's look at your child alittle differently.

(01:33):
Think of them as that they havea gate or an open door to your
child's brain, to your wholechild's system actually, and you
want that gate to stay open sothey can absorb the material, do
the work that they need to bedone for the day.

(01:55):
You've set a goal and you wantto reach that goal and you want
them to reach a goal.
You agreed on the goal for theday and they're just shutting
down.
So like if you live in a gatedcommunity, think of them that
that's what they live in.
They live in a gated communityand sometimes that gate will
shut down when you're trying toget that information in.

(02:16):
So when they start to shut down, we see some signs before they
do and they feel like somebody'sgoing to invade their home.
So if your doors are locked andshut and all of a sudden you've
got somebody trying to get intoyour home to break in, what are
you thinking about cookingdinner.
Are you going to be thinkingabout you know what next you

(02:39):
need to do?
No, you're going to be thinkinghow do I protect myself and
what do I need to do?
You're going to have thatflight or fight kind of emotions
, and that's what happens tothem.
So think of that.
You know how would you feel andthink how they must feel Once
that gate is closed.
You're not going to get anymore information in 're just not

(03:02):
cue the gallon of ice cream.
Remember that they don't alsocontrol it either.
It's not like something theysay yes or no to, or I'm not
gonna or not.
When they have those feelingsof that it'd be an invasion into
their, their uh, then it's thatgate's just going to shut on

(03:25):
them.
They're not saying I'm going toshut it out, their body is just
doing it.
So here's a few tips to kind ofhelp Keep it short.
So what does that mean?
Keep it short?
How many minutes do you work?
Well, I had read somewherewhere it said you take their age
and add two, maybe even three,but two, and then that's how

(03:50):
many minutes?
So if they're seven years old,you add two, that's nine.
So if you go, 10 minutes, okay.
So, whatever their age is, addtwo and that's your answer of
how many minutes at the table.
Now that doesn't mean that youcan't like say you do 10 minutes
and then you know they get abreak for whatever.
Do something different.
Maybe you can, like you know,if you're working on math, do

(04:14):
something in the kitchen, or ifyou're doing science, do
something outside.
You can kind of do it that waytoo and add to it.
Also, if you're reading outloud to them, that doesn't
include those minutes, becausethat's kind of something that
you're doing relaxing.
Those minutes are actually workminutes that you're working on

(04:34):
stuff it's not preparing oranything like that, it's just
actual minutes.
And make sure everything'sready, all your supplies is
there at the table before youbegin to work.
And find out which words workbetter with them.
How do I present theinformation to them?
Some work better than others.

(04:55):
It just depends.
It's just.
Let me give you an example,like when I'm working on math
skills.
There's some of my studentsthat have.
I have to say I have to putthat word in, equal to for them.
If I can't just say four plustwo, you have to say equal.
They need to hear that word.

(05:16):
So those are just some of thethings that may help your child.
Help your child to do a problem, do a problem with them.
If they're doing a math problem, you do one or something like
that.
Or if they're coloring, ask ifyou want them to help you color
something.
So be involved with what theydo, and not just that you're

(05:39):
doing it, but just that they'redoing it together and um, and
that helps in socializing too.
Body language.
So if you see them, put theirhands on their eyes or their
ears, they're looking away,they're y, they're getting ready
to close down.
So your job, your first job, isto keep that gate open, to keep

(06:01):
those doors open.
So remember, when you'resitting down, what's your first
job Keep the door open, becausethat's the only way you're going
to get information in.
Also, don't forget that.
You know it depends on yourchild to have those timers.
You know a visual so they cansee.
It can be.
I work for this and first, thenthen this it could be a

(06:26):
schedule where they take it offwith pictures, or it could be a
clock itself.
So you have to find out whatworks best with your child, what
makes them feel morecomfortable to be relaxed and be
open to the assignments.
Ask questions you know to themthey may not answer, but that's
okay.
Just keep asking thosequestions.

(06:47):
Maybe do the first problem forthem and that may help them too.
But, like I said, your firstjob is not helping them solve a
math problem or reading is tokeep that gate open or that door
open.
If they do shut down, it's okay.
Find ways to bring them backwithout discipline.

(07:09):
Remember, this is not somethingthat they're doing on their own
will, that they're doing ontheir own will, and so
discipline is not going to work.
So we need to find ways to openup.
So, like I said, if you'reworking on math, do something in
the kitchen, bake some cupcakesor something you know.
Plan something that, when theydo shut down on you, you can

(07:30):
bring them back and calm themback down and they are able to
open up again and receive theinformation.
Sometimes it takes a while.
It may take a few hours, it maytake the rest of the day, it
may take, you know, just a fewminutes.
So just find some techniquesthat work for you and your child

(07:51):
to help calm them down andbring them back to where they
need to finish up theirassignments, and if it's not
that day, then the next day.
Okay, don't let it get you downand don't let you be stressed
about it either.
Encourage them to complete atask.
You can also give them rewards,you know.

(08:13):
Okay, so when we get this done,maybe an extra minute or five
minutes or something on TV ortheir iPads or something like
that, or the only thing I wouldsay is don't you want a reward
system, but you don't want to beable to have to go to the store
every time they get something,a prize, because that doesn't
work either.
That's not real life and theyneed to know that every time you

(08:38):
walk in a store, they're notgoing to get something.
Now you can do things to helpthem with grocery shopping, and
that they help pick out somegood, healthy snacks and, like I
said before, read aloud canhelp them to relax.
It's not part of the time thatthey're actually working, but it

(08:59):
may help them to reopen thatgate too and find stories that
they like.
Right now, I'm working with oneof the students I'm working
with.
He's seven years old, and so helikes those short, you know,
with pictures like no David orsomething, one of those kind of
books.
He loves those kind of shortlittle stories where there's not

(09:21):
a lot of words.
Now I am starting to do some ofthose books with a lot of words
and he's getting a littlefrustrated with it.
But I'm just trying to increasehis endurance a little bit here
and there because he is rightnow homeschooling.
If he ever went back, you knowit's going to be a different
story.

(09:41):
So I'm trying to help him gaina little bit more time on task,
try new things like, like I saidyou know, go for walks, include
him in things that you like todo, and maybe he'd take an
interest in that.
So that's all that I have forthis podcast.
I am going to do another onethat's kind of related to this,

(10:04):
but I'm going to talk.
I've got to do a little bitmore research and I'm going to
talk about different parts ofthe brain and what is happening
with our brain.
Now, I'm not a doctor and I amin any way know a lot about
everything, that's for sure.
But I do want to just kind oftouch bases.
Years ago I worked in, I had areading lab and they came in and

(10:28):
did this program.
I worked in, I had a readinglab and they came in and did
this program.
I learned a lot about differentparts of the brain and how they
work, especially with reading.
So I do want to do a little bitof research and see if I can
come up with some things tomaybe help you with your child
and to understand what's goingon a little bit with their in
their brain.
So I will be doing my researchon that.

(10:50):
I am going to do another smallpodcast on some another topic
soon.
So anyway, I hope you have areally good, good day and a good
week.
Take care and God bless.